#so I'll save those for later on
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main take aways from Halloween (1978) rewatch:
michael myers is canonically 21??? this bitch should be at the club
*sees tiddies* ***MURDEROUS RAMPAGE NOISES***
that's it that's the movie
outside of the fact that everyone who has sex is murdered by the narrative, this is a surprisingly chill portrayal of female sexuality? these teen girls are horny and actively enjoying Getting It On with their boytoys. no pushy boyfriends sneaking in through their bedroom windows--these ladies are taking the initiative to sneak out and GET SOME. one of them gets laid and then immediately orders her boyfriend to get her a beer. (yes she gets Slashered soon afterward, but so does the boyfriend so honestly, gender equality.) yes the Final Girl is the only one not having sex, but she's not bullied for that, nor are her friends slut shamed except possibly by being murdered by the narrative
actually the only character who is shown being morally condemned on-screen is michael myers. specifically FOR his violent overreaction to other people's sex lives. (people he is spying on). metaphorically, the villain is American Puritanism sticking its judgy nose into other people's business.
aka Michael Myers Is A Republican
but actually the real villain is the doctor. guy's a judgemental, shaming, pathologizing asshole. and he's been in charge of michael's care since he was SIX YEARS OLD? kid never had a chance. i'd go on a killing spree too
also the parents. where are the parents? it's halloween night and all the teenage girls are home babysitting their younger siblings? come to think of it, michael's first victim was his own older sister, whom he killed while she was babysitting him. teen girls are really shouldering a labour burden here. maybe parentification is the true villain
side note: mike commits his first murder wearing a clown costume...which is never referenced again? his 'iconic' costume is a generic mask and wig and jumpsuit, when we coulda had a Killer Clown Michael Myers??? travesty
i like how the Final Girl and her friend casually smoke weed in her car. yeah she's an honor student and her friend is the sheriff's daughter. yeah they smoke weed. so what it's 1978
(to reiterate, mike is 21 and should be at the club. im not saying he shouldn't be rampaging, im saying it's sad that he broke out, tasted freedom for the first time in his life, and immediately snuck back into his childhood home to go rampaging. let's have a remake where he goes to a nightclub and has a few beers. maybe some slutty dancing. then rampage)
oh no he's hot

#HALLOWEEN#halloween the movie#michael myers#do you think he's a mike? mikey? to his friends? if slashers had friends?#i'll be honest i was expecting this movie to be way more of a bitch to its female characters#i mean yeah they died but so did some dudes#there's just a lack of cattiness compared to the way most later movies portrayed teenage girls idk#yeah the Final Girl is a Virgin and a Bookworm. but there's no bullying or any strong sense that's she's morally superior to everyone else#mostly she AND the other girls feel a bit sorry for her lack of a social life. one even tries to set her up with a date to the school dance#solidarity! trying to get your nerd friend laid!#overall it's just teenagers being teenagers and then a slasher comes in and ruins everything with his Lack Of Chill#like yeah dude sometimes teenagers have sex. get over it#also something to be said about how while the girl who survives is the one who isn't sexually active and dresses conservatively...#ultimately those things aren't ENOUGH to prevent her from being targeted#you could say that the other girls 'provoked' the villain (the same way women irl are so often accused of provoking their attackers)#but ultimately that doesn't keep the Final Girl safe. it just delays the inevitable.#because violent men never need excuses. no matter how eager society is to provide them.#ultimately she is at the mercy of the same violent whims because it was never her behavior that invited the violence.#gendered violence doesn't need an invitation.#also she doesn't save herself the doctor saves her#it's not her actions or choices that put her in danger OR save her from it--once again it is the whim of a man#no this wasn't intended to be a feminist movie it's just fun how you could argue it that way
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jason is a grandpa's boy and u cant take this away from me!!! they cook together, they discuss literature together, and when jay comes back, they clean their guns together haha. ofc they celebrate their birthday together too! 😌
✨️🎂 hbd jay & alfie 🎂✨️
#jason todd#alfred pennyworth#batfamily#batfamily fanart#dc#dc fanart#batman#red hood#dc red hood#they have one of those relationships where jason outright says he loves alfred the most and alfred refuses to say he has a fave grandkid#but it's kind of just concensus that it's jason cuz he's the only one allowed in the kitchen#i am also a heavy believer in the hc that for a while there jason wouldnt meet up with anyone but alfred#and theyd meet for tea and stuff outside the manor#i love those fics#i was gonna draw an in-between angsty one where alf has a picnic by jay's grave with tea and cake for two but i dont have the energy 😅#i was also gonna draw a red hood and agent A one with the guns they were cleaning but again: no more energy 💀#mb i'll save that one for later. i still love the idea so much. :')
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I was reading a post about CoTG and I realized: Rick has seemingly started to write every character pairing with the exact same dynamic, and he's not good at writing that dynamic and it doesn't make sense for 90% of the characters he writes it for.
It's that very specific dynamic of one half of the pair who is almost aggressive to the other party - "teasing" them constantly/insulting them, affectionately punching/judo flipping/maiming/etc, seemingly almost always exasperated with the other - and said other party usually just accepts this treatment or blanketly views it fondly, and may generally be framed as more incompetent than their partner and a little bit of a doormat (particularly relating to being insulted/teased/etc by their partner).
We start seeing this dynamic in HoO with Percy and Annabeth, as a sort of semi-inconsistent twist on their rivals-to-friends-to-lovers dynamic from the first series. Then the dynamic pattern develops further with Leo and Calypso. Then Magnus and Alex. Then Nico and Will, particularly in TSATS. And now in CoTG, it's Percy and Annabeth again but even more in this direction.
I know people have talked about Nico and Will's relationship over the series rapidly being shoehorned into Percabeth Two™, and it's extremely apparent in TSATS that Rick's doing it on purpose (including directly quoting Percabeth scenes but minorly tweaking them to be Solangelo). But recognizing it as an overarching trend in Rick's later books honestly reminds me a lot of how Rick started trying to apply the "Percy Formula" so-to-speak to nearly every protagonist in HoO (and then try to replicate similar character archetypes with Magnus and Apollo's narrations - moreso Magnus in being jaded and sarcastic, very much trying to be first series Percy. He only sounds unique because Rick failed at making him Percy 2. Apollo is more akin to later-series Percy characterization of being goofy and incompetent. Apollo [and Zeus] even got retconned to give Apollo a more similar backstory to Percy's). Rick seems to have decided that he thinks the audience wants this specific dynamic but 10 times over, except he's not good at writing it the first time because it's a bastardization of the time he did a different thing okay.
And Rick also seems aware of that too! Because he retconned Calypso and Leo at the end of TOA, probably because he realized how absolutely awful it was reading when they were written with that dynamic of Calypso just functionally hating Leo and constantly being aggressive towards him! The only time Rick's actually made the dynamic even semi-successful was with Magnus and Alex, because it actually fits within their characters, their dynamics with each other, and their environment. Alex beheading Magnus on the regular works out fine because there are no repercussions to that in Valhalla, Magnus will be fine, so it does genuinely come off as humorous. And Alex has been effectively established to be abrasive at times but have her genuine feelings shine through regularly, and that meshes well with Magnus' jaded-and-aloof-but-quietly-very-empathetic character. And Magnus has been established to, yes, not be great at combat, particularly compared to Alex. They are the only time that flavor of dynamic in that form was effective and cohesive.
Percabeth is no longer rivals-to-friends-to-lovers badasses on equal levels with shaky pasts who finally found some form of permanence with one another. Now it's super smart doting and affectionately aggressive girlfriend and her silly goofy 50%-of-the-time incompetent boyfriend who she judo flips/pushes off cliffs/etc - but affectionately~! Solangelo is trying to riff off of the early series "Poseidon & Athena are enemies" dynamic that Percabeth had but with Apollo & Hades being "opposites" but learning to accept each other, except it ends up with Will just coming off as a huge asshole and Nico being retconned to a complete doormat about it - when prior to that those characterizations would be completely contrary to their established characters (even just from TOA!). Calypso in HoO gets retconned from her PJO characterization to being snooty and aggressive, and Leo's false persona gets merged into his just normal personality except he just also becomes a doormat but more goofy than Nico with occasional haha-dark/depression-humor! Which Nico also got. Which was also a bastardized Percy trait that got redistributed.
It's exhausting. Rick write more than one relationship dynamic you can do it I promise
#pjo#riordanverse#percy jackson#tsats#annabeth chase#nico di angelo#will solace#mcga#magnus chase#alex fierro#leo valdez#calypso pjo#analysis#< bwah i feel bad putting that many tags but it is relevant#rr crit#< i guess?#tsats crit#< that one can be here though. the other crit tag is usually for Bad Stuff ergo why i feel weird putting it. this one's just random stuff#i feel like i should tag ships too cause it is an analysis of those ship dynamics in canon but i dont want it to come off as shipbashing :(#eh fuck it i'll ship tag. disclaimer- this is not shipbashing i am just doing analysis of how rick is bad at writing this specific dynamic#i am tagging these ships for relevancy and analysis purposes only. i do not intend to be mean about them re: fanon#fierrochase#percabeth#solangelo#caleo#i do think this is good to note though with writing these dynamics - like rick's intentions vs execution vs consistent characterization#i think you could also argue Carter and Zia exhibit some traits of this dynamic? like an early form of it in Rick's writing perhaps#i havent reread it in awhile though so i will save my thoughts on it for later#long post //#forgive if this post is semi-incomprehensible it was a quick late night rambly thing
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Dark enchantress cookie redesign
#I've been thinking about her recently#my only knowledge of her is from kingdom so thats the only version i know but she actually seem pretty empathetic all things considered#i mean she raised velvet and keeps members of the cod that probably hinder her progress [COUGH COUGH licorice and poison muchroom COUGH]#dont get me wrong i like them alot and i think the are sweet but for a while i really didn't understand why she kept them around because of#the way all the cookies talk about her charater#she would seem verry tough love or just ruthless but in actuality she just keeps adopting these weird cookies she finds#she also knows what they are good at and plays into those strength. pome is good at keeping things organized. Mushroom is good at#keeping others guard down. licorice is willing to work hard to succeed at any task given#choco is good at fighting and keeping his team safe. she clearly knows them fairly well and also sometimes supports the stupid stuff they#want to do#i would say pome is more ruthless then dark enchantress herself#anyway i have more thoughts about her but I'll save them for a later time. thanks for reading ig ^^#dark enchantress cookie#dark enchantress crk#crk#cookie run kingdom
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It's taking me ages to write this chapter because every time I look through old VODs / notes to check something, I come across moments like this that make me want to lie down face-first on the floor:
[Context: Pac commits to the idea of taking the Happy Pills so he can create a cure. He's about to write a note to Cellbit to explain his plan.]
Pac: If Cellbit puts himself in this position, it's worse for everyone, because Cellbit is smarter when it comes to coming up with strategic plans, so he is the thinking mind of the Favela Five group, so if he no longer has the mind, he’s not capable of solving this whole problem, you know? But if I put myself in this position to help Cellbit so he can get the cure... You understand? It's better if I'm the bait. Right? I can't- I can't carry things alone guys, I've already lost Mike [...] if I lose Cellbit and I alone had to carry things, I won't be able to. But I think Cellbit can manage better. He is more independent, and he has Roier. He has a husband. I'm trying to– to be lucid here, understand? That's all.
Date: September 11, 2023 || Timestamp: 03:10:10
#i talk#qsmp talk#Oh Pac... :((((#I know the Happy Pills arc is soured for a lot of us (for valid reasons) but I still love it because of how vital it is to Pac's character#This arc is what solidified him as my favorite character. He was so brave and he's so full of love and grief#Aghh. Those self-worth issues man... :(((#Pac cubito I carry you in my heart forever and ever and always#fic talk#I don't know if it's funny or miserable that whenever I fact-check myself thinking#''Am I misremembering this / misrepresenting this? Is this too grim?''#The answer is no I hit it dead center#I love Pac's dynamic with all the Favela members but Pac and Cellbit's relationship dynamic has so many layers#it's fascinating to explore#Especially since in the stream before this he had a complete breakdown because he was terrified Cell was going to come back#Love and fear and friendship and anger and hate and healing...#So many layers#The murderer who once mauled him who he left to die#Now a dear friend and co-parent of his son#It's fascinating#What breaks my heart is when Cellbit finds out Pac took the Happy Pills a few days later and they have a confrontation#Cellbit tells him ''You were my only hope- the only scientific person who could create a cure; how are we supposed to save you?''#''We still had one another and now I'm alone!'' <– As always please take my translation with a grain of salt#But man. MAN.... Pac saying Cellbit will be fine he can handle things on his own and he has Roier#vs. Cellbit having the same fears of being left alone#I wonder if; even for a moment; he remembered what it felt like when Pac (e Mike) abandoned him on that Island after Fuga#Obviously he realized / later learned why Pac took the pills but AGH!!!!!!!!!! It hurts.#I wish they logged on at the same time more frequently I WISH we got to see them interact more#I can't really explore this too much in the Fit Pac fic but I am delving into it in the Pac fic#I don't think I'll go as in-depth with the Happy Pill stuff as I'm doing in this fic though. This has been exhausting. It's a heavy arc#(Stream date: September 13 2023 || Timestamp 1:34:00 for Cellbit's POV of that conversation btw)
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some of the portraits ive made for my kingmaker games
#kingmaker shenanigans#undescribed#my art#ive run out of brains for words but basically: first 2 are from yesterday for Thorns' party. feature thorns and viridian.#second set is from today. featuring Amore. Eurydice and Lambkin for the lets romance nyrissa and save the world entirely#i'll explain later some of the details here and there designs wise. like amore's broke heart with her horns and lambkin's halo being a#spiked collar cause chien enragé barbarian. stuff like that. first crew are lvl3 second only lvl2 so those are they baby stage#those are really fun to do theres a Lot more i'll have to draw
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interesting to think about how constantine isn't commonly read as being the most morally upright of characters, and that's generally a fair assessment. but at the same time he can still be a surprisingly ethical character, particularly in terms of the values he holds synonymous with being a good community member.
a couple examples of (what i think are) his most consistently held values throughout the hellblazer series:
constantine feels very strongly about things like defending people's bodily autonomy and showing kindness & compassion towards society's more vulnerable demographics, especially kids & unhoused people.
he frequently & sincerely upholds the basic principles of xenia (showing hospitality towards foreigners, guests, and anyone whose fate is in your hands), and possesses a deep, innate sense of justice that he is unafraid to uphold when he feels it necessary to do so.
he personally values survival above honor but still has a healthy appreciation for people that are committed to a code,
he respects integrity more than he'd respect a good liar (even if he fucking hates you, at least you're being true to yourself; can't help it if yourself is just a prick),
and he is CONSTANTLY PLAGUED by a deeply personal sense of social responsibility to try and nip potential threats to the world, to his city, or to his friends in the bud if he thinks it might be within his capabilities to do so.
of course, it's key to note that constantine's code of ethics was also founded primarily in accordance with the principles of '70s-'80s counterculture + still largely abides by the social beliefs of the same-era punk community, and thus also includes more subjectively-judged tenets such as challenging the establishment, defying the government, protecting individual liberties, taking direct action in support of your community, putting people above possessions at every turn, and actively addressing social issues wherever / whenever you encounter them. so he's not always viewed by other characters (particularly upper-class bootlicking ones) as being particularly ethical. doesn't change the fact that constantine still adamantly maintains certain major ethical principles in accordance with the social systems he inhabits and was raised in.
#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS.#( character study. ) A WALKING PLAGUE OF A MAN.#don't @ me for referencing xenia si spurrier has nothing to do with this. i just love the concept#i had a very interesting twofold coincidence that led to this post (well. interesting to me probably very mundane all told)#was rereading hellblazer 12 and when ritchie demanded that john find him a body to hop into? john's response was verbatim:#'a body? jesus mate. hang about. don't you think there might be a question of ethics here?'#and i giggled at that a little bc john constantine? ethics? come on now. but it made sense given his own struggles w/ autonomy#but then i saw a post later on that read 'let's do something unethical together. just for fun' and thought it was silly#and when i went to reblog it for john i stopped and thought about it and realized. no he wouldn't find that very fun actually#cue rabbit hole into morality vs ethics with a side jaunt into what the hell is moral nihilism#plus a dash of key recurring themes in hellblazer (bodily autonomy. standing up to injustice. compassion towards the vulnerable.)#i may be getting ahead of myself but i now think compounding morality + ethics into a uniform behavioral monolith#or else mistaking one for the other. Might Be a very big reason why john gets SO mischaracterized in later dc adaptations#like yes! he often has to resort to behavior / making decisions that are (to us) Obviously Morally Wrong in order to save the world#sacrificing gary lester to a demon. leaving ritchie trapped in a computer. lying to get baron winters' help against the brujeria.#and yes! that Morally Wrong behavior can and does involve causing harm to the people around him (albeit usually inadvertently)#Doesn't! Mean! He Has! No Sense! of Decency! or Empathy! or Right! or Wrong! just because he Had to Resort to an Immoral Act!#there were still Valid or at least Understandable Ethical Reasons behind ALL THREE EXAMPLES i just listed above!!!#that's why two of those examples are GUT-WRENCHING!! bc he betrayed his moral beliefs in support of his ethical principles!!#i can punch someone in the face and still feel compelled by my cultural norms to help a little old lady cross the street right after!!#upon reflection: whoa nelly. i fear i am getting needlessly heated over this. Anyways#if you've followed me for a bit you're already aware of how i feel about the continued mischaracterization of constantine in media lmao#i've said my piece. i've done my morality and ethics homework. i can rest now#and i'll say upfront that it would be Extremely funny if i wrote all this out + later find out i've been mixing up the two. bc it would be
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I CANNOT GET OVER HOW COOL FLESHA'S MOVEMENT IS IN THE FINALIE!!
LIKE THE FIGHT??? THE FUCKING FIGHT??? IT'S SO ELEGENT YET JANKY AND SHE"S SO CHILL AND SMILELY IT"S SOOOO CREEEPPPYY!!!! SHE"S SO SURE SHE"S GONNA WIN I CAN"T!!
AND ITS SO ELEGENT!!!! LIKE SHE"S COMPLETLY HIJACKED THIS FLESH VESSEL AND KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!! IT"S TOO SMOOTH AND ITS SUCH A GOOD CONTRAST TO UZI"S STRONG AND HARD HITTING MOVEMENTS!!!
LIKE UZI HAS NATRUAL JERK AND EVERYTHING SHE DOES IS EITHER A HIT OR RESTABLIZING HERSELF AFTER SHE HitS LIKE I CANT ARTICULATE IT BUT IT"S COOL AS FUCK!!!
WATCH THE FINALIE!! ITS SO MUCH BETTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE
#9/10 show#my only problem is that they did doll SO DIRTY#my girl deserves better#Genuinely though I came in with mid expectaions and was BLOWN OUT OF THE WATER#Like MD's writings good but it's not the best#I forgot that the goal of the show is TO HAVE A GOOD TIME!!!#I AM EATING THIS SHIT UP#literally this is the stuff I get hyped for#God I love it#THEY BROUGHT V BACK!!!#AND WE GOT J MOTIVES#literally my only problem is doll#she deserved more closer#like i wish the snapshot we got of the funeral was played somewhat seriously#someone needs to acknowledge how cool she was#if J is V if she didn't have friends and those parallels are explored in their fight#Then Uzi needs to acknowledge that doll is her without friends#but I guess they didn't have time#which is fair#I have so many thoughts about this show#but I'll save them for later#murder drones uzi#murder drones spoilers#murder drones#murder drones cyn#murder drones flesha#murder drones ep 8#murder drones episode 8
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I really like the voices that end up coming around in Chapter II, and how differently the world and the Princess become.
Don’t get me wrong, there are some absolutely wild variations of the Cabin and the Princess in later chapters, and it’s nice hearing all the voices bounce off of each other if you get to a Chapter III or Chapter IV (though at that point it’s quite hectic), but there’s just something very neat to me when it’s just you, the two voices you started with, and the one newcomer. It’s fun how the game interprets what you did in the previous chapter, what kind of person you’d have to be to make those choices, or how you’d be feeling after they’d been made.
For example, when I was going about the game for the first time, I didn’t quite like the idea of blindly accepting what the Narrator had told me about the Princess when he was my only source of information. But at the same time, he really was the only information I had to go on. I decided it was probably best to take the knife with me, while fully planning on discarding it if I heard enough from her side of things to determine he was wrong, if not outright lying. The meeting with her wasn’t illuminating, like I hoped, but I had grown more doubtful of Him than I did of her. So I decided to set her free. See what would actually happen if she walked out of the cabin. What the Narrator then tried to pull left me very distrustful of him, so of course I did my best to fight him at every chance, before the Princess mercifully ended it.
I got the Skeptic, which fit perfectly.

(Narrator: Did you just say 'wink' out loud?)
(Voice of the Skeptic: No, I didn't. Wink.)
Anytime he shows up again he’s the one I’m most drawn to agreeing with, and because we seem to be on the same page so often, he’s the one I’m more inclined to listen to if he has something he’s interested in doing, even if I enjoy the other voices too.
My brother, even more blind about how this game worked than I was, decided to leave the dagger behind. He talked with the Princess, all soft and bubbly in contrast to my version, up until he decided the best option was for them to just hang out and get to know each other better. “I can make sandwiches!”
No one besides the Hero liked this idea.
The sudden change in the Princess’s behavior set my brother on edge enough that he was still of the belief that it’d probably be best to just leave her chained up. Then, with her shouting creepy threats at him as he ascended the stairs, and the Narrator prompting him with the reminder that he could come back down to finish the job, he figured that’d probably be the best solution, and retrieved the knife.
Then he saw the discarded remains of her chewed off arm, previously attaching her to the shackles it still limply laid in.

He was NOT comfortable venturing out into the dark after her, and tried to wait her out in supposed safety. It didn’t work. He fell asleep, she pounced, it all went dark. And he died.
He got the Hunted, whom he grew attached to quickly, immediately following his advice without question and then pleading for it when it wasn’t given.
Though I don’t have him here right now to verify if this is how he particularly felt, I think it perfectly fits with the feeling a theoretical player would have with these choices. You gave her the benefit of the doubt, and decided that something was off enough to justify her imprisonment, then dangerous enough to warrant your original mission. She’s not just dangerous, she’s a predator, and only a fool chases after a predator. You’re not looking to be a hero, you’re looking to survive.
Also it’s just very ironic to me that he’s absolutely obsessed with Dungeon Meshi right now and got the most Dungeon Meshi aligned route that could possibly exist. The monstrous chimera, the more heavy focus on action, to eat or be eaten, and if you are eaten, do you give up then? Or do you continue to fight for your survival? The underlying message I saw someone else mention of how to eat is to love.
Crazy stuff.
#slay the princess#slay the princess spoilers#bit of play experience#ouroborosreilig#it is also interesting that I got the Prisoner first out of all possible variations#but I don't have the words to get into why right now#I've got some other interpretations for what I think the game is interpreting is going on player side for a first experience of chapter II#but I haven't reached all of those yet so I'll just save them for a reblog addition later#if I remember
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oh boy reader beweader it's time for indy to vent in their tags!!!!!!!
#lalala please don't read if you don't want to! nothing down here is majorly triggering it's just kind of Dumb and Sad#I'm having some sort of episode!!!! and this is probably going to be deleted later!!!!#Vents 🏹#I am 😁 not a good person 😁#I am! kind of just a bad person! and I kind of just have to deal with that forever 😁 fun so fun#like. the most I'll ever be able to be is sort of maybe okay. and I just gotta. accept that#most of all I think I'm just really really stupid. intelligence has no moral value but I don't feel that it's helping my case#it's just one of those days where I just. I feel like everyone should give up on me now#do it while you're still ahead. everyone in my life is being set up for failure.#I'm sorry guys I know you came here to see me post silly drawings but. fucking whatever.#I'm never going to amount to anything. I just wish everyone would stop trying. save themselves the heartbreak yknow?#idk it just kind of makes me sad. I have to live 24/7 with someone who I know for a fact is a sniveling sack of horseshit#I'll never be able to do anything worthwhile. I wish everybody would just give up on me already. I already have
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me, who probably quite likely has that chronic fatigue thing on account of being chronically fatigued, and goes through every day feeling as such: holy crap how come i got the eeps so bad
#ok no but really though ggggggggggggg#i do honestly feel like it's getting worse. sitting up for any length of time is very difficult#if i ever have to get a job again im so screwed#why oh why am i one of those fuckers caffiene doesn't work for#doctors: you are deficient in The Vitamins#me: OH SWEET so i'll take The Vitamins and feel better!#me several months later feeling worse: hrng save me The Vitamins save me
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Okay.
One more Bowser drawing and then I'll go right back to making Mareach fluff. Pinky promise. 😌💟
#As I do best! 😉🤭#I have 2 other bro centered drawings in store as well#But on second thought I think I'm gonna save those for a bit later#Tumblr has been acting weird for me lately ><#I want to make sure that my next fully rendered pieces will reach my followers properly cause I'm really proud of those ;_;#So in the meantime I think I'll stick wity slightly quicker/simpler sketches 😅#Good thing is it might allow me to work faster and cover more ideas x3👍#See you then! 🤗#Mario#Bowser#Princess Peach#Mareach#fanart and fanwork
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The fact that pots and cfs/me is incurable (I'm convinced that that's a lie, just like with "incurable" stuff like cancers, there is possible treatments, but doctors couldn't give less of a fuck about us and thus aren't doing research on what could help us) and this constant song and dance of fighting with parents and doctors to get help or even believed at all and going nowhere. And most importantly, that this is my new forever, and I'll NEVER be able to go back to what i could do only 2 years ago, is finally sinking in
And I'm only fucking 21, 20 when it started
I'm seeing people lamenting about not being able to do what they did in their 20s now, but i haven't even got to try adulthood at all before it got ripped away from me forever
How the fuck am i supposed to keep going knowing that no one will ever understand or give me help, i will constantly get not believed and pushed into crashes by doing the bare minimum, and everything i was planning and excited about doing because of the freedom of adulthood, be it learning new hobbies, travelling somewhere, or just where and how I'd like to move in and live in the future, has to be dumped in the trash
But yeah it's all anxiety in my head. Go take walks, loose weight, drink water, play less video games (i play around 6 hours a week) and go play board games at the public library, they say
Great
This is my new "life"
#usually those kind of vents never leave my drafts#but i'm so fucking done#if i keep getting pushed while refusing to give me the help i need#I'm gonna get stuck in a wheelchair at best. or genuinely bed bound at worst#i know it. i SAW it in cfs and pots spaces while looking for advice and help#it keeps happening. and i can see how the same thing that made them end up like that is happening to me#having to live in and fight this body is already bad enough#why do i have to keep fighting *everyone* around me on top#the more I'm forced to have to interact with government official healthcare like assurance maladie centers or the mdph (disability house)#the worst i get treated#so far. what I've seen is that the best way for me to get help is going to highly specific. rare. and scattered around the country. private#and expensive specialists#it's how i got my autism diagnosis after 15 years of running around therapist to therapist#it's how i (half) got my pots diagnosis after almost 10 years of being told I'm “just fat and don't do sports” (a lie on both front btw)#if i want anything. i need to avoid official infrastructures. save up money. and drive for hours. and hope that i win the coinflip of them#knowing what they're talking about#thought getting a diagnosis still hasn't gotten me any help. but at least i can fill up the official disability paper and wait for an answe#though I'm sure I'll have to fight with them too#cfs/me#pots syndrome#PROBABLY CAN'T DRIVE TOO BECAUSE OF MY DISABILITIES. SO STUCK RELYING ON PUBLIC TRANSPORT. OR OTHER PEOPLE TO DRIVE ME TO THOSE PRIVATE#SPECIALISTS. WHILE I HAD TO DROP OUT OF SCHOOL AND GENUINELY DON'T KNOW HOW I'LL POSSIBLY GET A JOB LATER. SO CAN'T MAKE MONEY#IT'S FUCKING GREAT. I LOVE IT HERE /S#vent#rant
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SKITTERS LIKE A CRITTER AT MACH SPEEDS. Hey. >:3
Since you mentioned wanting to try your hand at the drawing challenge... may I request VRV Hypnos (ep2) in "Crying Lightning"?
A Hypnos request in my inbox? HEHEHE why you shouldn't have (:
#m scribbles#m asks#hlvrv#hlvrv dr hypnos#I'll admit you gave me QUITE the challenging palette!I DID have to cheat a little and steal a shade of black to make this work#BUT!!! IT WAS A VERY FUN CHALLENGE AND IT TURNED OUT VERY COOL (:#I still have the lineart for this saved too so i might come back later and do this again with his normal colours too!#Aaa. I'll play this extra safe and add an#eyestrain#because. YEP my eyes certainly are straining on those curls haha#eye contact
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you guys realize that things (the DMC Netflix anime) don't necessarily need to be either (1) the equivalent to the Holy Grail or (2) like it killed your grandma. you guys realize 'mediocre' and 'generic' exist. right.
#i am unfortunately from the negative side of this all#i'm salty. i've written a lot of criticism. and i despise the attitude of the showrunner with my whole being#but also. i have a life. so i simply shared those thoughts with. like. two close people#and i have everything muted because: i'm tired boss#look. yes. some people have done ridiculous criticism. that's true#but most of the times... it bas been justified. i am sorry. but it has#we're back with the 'wacky woohoo pizza man' bullshit again. and with Vergil only being the damn storm that is apro#you get it.#i would prefer for this to be the absolute worst as some people claim it to be so i didn't get it to jumpscare me more#but unfortunately it's not. it's just mediocre#another generic action anime for me#and i don't even watch much stuff in general. i either read or play stuff#but i can't just sit and watch. so like. i just want april to pass. i'm tired bosssssss#probably because due to me not being the most-mentally-stable-person-out-there#— i cannot enjoy a ✨piece of media✨ like any normal human being would#it has to both (1) save my life and (2) ruin my life. no in between#hyperfixations. yeah. but this time for real#The Odyssey (yes the damn poem) has been stucked with me since i was 10 years old#that's a whole decade of something affecting my life and the way i am#and now. last year Devil May Cry was added as the second one#i always avoided the saga like the plague. the memes. the view of the series the fandom gave me... it just wasn't it#and perhaps it's thanks that a mutual convinced me to start with 1 and not with 5 that my mind had changed so quickly#so seeing a story and characters that have affected me in both the good and the bad at such a deep level#— getting changed almost completely for the sake of a bottleg universe#eh. i'll pass#then again. it's just not for me#i guess. not like i'll go tell my therapist about it#because it's not good. it's not bad. it's mediocre#and something generic at least will pass by. i hope#deleting later
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Bestieeeeee 😻,
What is your worst IE headcannons?
I'll tell mine back 💅💅💅
I may be too out-of-touch from the fandom to know what people would consider bad and worst but I do have some that others may have an issue with! AND I WAS JUST ABOUT TO ASK YOU ABOUT HEADCANONS TOO, BUT YOU GOT ME FIRST! AND I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW YOURS VERY MUCH!! (although I haven't watched most of ares and orion so i may not understand some for now, I would love to hear them still!!)
This ended up a long post, I'm making this cut...
I'll start with a tame one (may also be really boring), but this one needs my other hcs for anyone to understand the actual one I want to share. Here's a "brief" list of the others (happened between og series and inago):
Gouenji has unparallel knowledge of ALL Disney, Pixar, Dreamworks, and Ghibli movies and will defend the female characters with his life. (This is why I thought he probably knows MLP as I said on the last ask)
He's not a fan of social media and does not use anything outside of inalink and private messaging. Not because he's cool, he just doesn't understand them. Much like in honosuto with the laptop, initially with inatube, and how he always forgets his useless phone.
Yuuka convinced him to make an inatter (twitter) and inagram account because she does not want anyone to steal the @ and that she also wants to be able to tag him on her posts (and of his teammates/friends) so they can keep the memories. He saves all the pictures he gets tagged in and sometimes prints them out to keep in an album he designed (he's very good with crafts). I still can't believe honosuto came up with those social media names (except for inagram)
He only cared about the bare minimum use of social media so he only ever retweets in inatter (never made his own tweet ever; but he does reply on some that addresses him) and only posts his creations on inagram with no caption or a few words about what he made (made takoyaki, felted a bunny, crocheted a penguin, made cupcakes, etc.).
He only has three kinds of inatter rts: about soccer, about making art, and tweets of his friends and family. Yuuka made his bio in both of them. He also became good at taking pictures of his creations thanks to Yuuka.
However, he is mildly updated with internet language because that's all he hears from his sister and her friends and from his own friends in the group chat that he only talks in when he's mentioned. He assimilated most of the phrases they use in chats.
Having said all this, he almost has no social media presence. You're lucky to see his page updated after two weeks. He doesn't reply with strangers either unless it's a kid who loves or interested in soccer.
He also doesn't share much in interviews. Very bare minimum of answering questions and always answers in short sentences and just poses for the camera shortly before he bounces. His favorite answer to questions is "oh that's private" not because it's private but because he doesn't want to talk that long in public unless it's something that needs to be said. Example is a question of his opinion on human rights-- something that his agent and/or soccer club prevented the press from ever asking him again (an hc drop another time). He always had strong opinions and doesnt hold back in expressing them (og series and inago) and that's trouble for the club sponsors so they make a lot of effort of stopping anyone from having the opportunity of asking him anything outside of his personal and athlete life.
And the last context here is that Gouenji is autistic, but we already know that.
Okay so now time for the actual bad HC I want to share... which is how Gouenji came out as bisexual to the public
This started with an inatter thread of a person criticizing Anna (Frozen) for her actions in the first movie that reached Gouenji's timeline. Gouenji answers with 7 tweets worth of respectful paragraph of why Anna shouldn't be criticized because of how she was brought up, because of her isolation, and because of her grief, etc. So, everybody lost their mind, etc etc. AND NOW, at the midst of all this, a soccer fan asked him the question below that he answered without thinking much about:
This blew up and his notifications gets flooded with questions about his sexuality and questionable taste that he really didn't mind answering if it wasn't blowing up his phone.
He was out with everyone in his circle that he forgot the world didn't know he's bi. So, he fixed that by tweeting "yes, im bisexual" on his timeline. He logs out and then decided to wait a few months before logging in again.
This didn't sound as fun as I amped it up to be but I think it's a terribly bland HC that I find kind of funny
BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THAT ASK!! I VERY MUCH WANT TO HEAR YOURS!!!
#i hate that there needs to be this much context to a stupid hc i have#im so sorry for making you through reading all that#go* through#ie imagined by lore#inazuma eleven go#inazuma eleven#gouenji shuuya#axel blaze#halftime lore#garbage--account#i was about to tell like another different one but this got too long. i'll save those for later#inazuma eleven headcanon
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