#so I do have to tag it. I’m sorry

[shmothman]

T for the NSFW HC alphabet <3 For Vash obviously

SFW/NSFW Alphabet Prompts

(Vash/Reader)

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

NSFW below the cut, folks. 18+ only.

God knows I want to write a fic about this eventually, but headcanons will have to do for now. In effect: something something lost tech. Humanity will find a way to keep making dildos and vibrators, no matter how dire the situation is, so I KNOW you can still get your hands on that stuff on this desert ass planet. And Vash has been alive for a long long time, so there’s no way he hasn’t at least tried some stuff. I don’t think he owns any—the man travels with just a duffel bag of all of his belongings—but he’s used them before, if very rarely. I don’t even think he jacks off all that often (he’s… depressed); at least not until he has a crush and his sex drive kicks into high gear. As y’all know, I’m fond of giving him weird alien genitals, but a vibrator’s gonna work on just about anything, and Vash is sensitive. In fact, vibrators are borderline too much for him, and they’re certainly not conducive to the shitty inns with flimsy walls that he ends up staying in, when he even gets to stay the night somewhere at all. Fleshlights, though—if you see him with a cock, or something analogous to one—those are his favorite. Vash could go ham on a fleshlight. He’ll pretend it’s you, of course—he knows the real thing would be so much better, but it’s all he has right now (all he’ll ever be able to let himself have, he tells himself). He’s fast and merciless with it, biting down on whatever he can to muffle himself, whining and drooling and sighing your name.

Once he has a partner, though, that changes the whole game. I honestly don’t think he’d be the one to bring it up—he’s plenty happy with the sex you’ve been having, and I think it wouldn’t really be on his radar at first—but if you mention something… well. He just wants to please you. And he can’t deny the appeal of the mental image it conjures up in his brain of you writhing on the sheets for him. So he’ll happily use whatever you want on you, however you want him to use it, eyes wide and cheeks flushed the entire time, hell bent on your pleasure as always. And when you ask if he wants a turn? He turns scarlet, more aroused by the idea than he ever thought he would be. Perhaps it’s just because it’s you holding the vibrator against his length, smiling at him so teasingly, asking him if it feels good—it’s so much, and he’s going to come quicker than ever, chest heaving as he pants for breath, his hair sweat-stuck to his forehead.

The same goes for other types of toys: he’s beyond happy to take your strap or a dildo, and cock rings are right up his alley—you can’t convince me this man isn’t into edging and denial. And, again, fleshlights: if you tell him you’d like to see him use it, he’ll be so embarrassed—but he’ll do it; show you how he used to pretend. (And then probably beg to actually be inside you—and you wouldn’t say no to that.)

Oh! And that idea I’ve seen floating around about a lost tech strap that lets the wearer feel it? Vash’s first time being stroked and sucked and able to bury himself inside you? It’s strange, and novel, and feels so goddamn good that he might just die, falling apart at the seams the moment your hand is on him.

[boobilby]

Being even more cringe than usual

Featuring my friends drawing of Joel, who I’m pretty sure they don’t even know, @dustystripe is the friend

[theoldkyokodied]

Aaaaand more very quick stream doodles. This one shot was so fun to watch, it’s so sad that it had to end already. But oh well, let’s not dwell on that and let’s enjoy the good time we had, like disguised tiefling gale being both Karlachs and astarions type, wyll and gale having a spa day, bing bong in general (rip king, you will be missed), and of course the 8 strength fight for magic items <3 thanks to the cast for the chaos, I enjoyed it thoroughly

[durge-marzio]

Ohhh, I'm rereading Mystra's entry in the Sword Coast Adventurer's Guide... and this detail:

This means Gale was punished for trying to restore and preserve what he thought was a lost piece of Mystra's magic. Gale being Mystra's ex-lover put aside. He as her follower, she his goddess, was punished for attempting to do the one foundational rule of her faith.

I'm seething and so sad at the same time.

Edit: I used the word punish loosely, as in, toxic/abusive people will take any small mistake or action and twist it into something they can take advantage of. This post was also largely from the stand point of a toxic deity rather than a toxic partner, but both takes are valid here. Especially with the, “you didn’t stay compliant so now I’m giving you the silent treatment” part of it—from a god and a partner perspective.

[kiwinatorwaffles]

i pity people who say “yeah it’s nice to see these two characters as friends but their relationship becomes so much more meaningful if you see them as romantic.” how has the dredges of the amanormative world poisoned you this bad? have you never had a friend or wanted a friend who changed your life for the better? or if you do i feel bad for them because of so obviously little you value them

[rystiel]

shipping chart thoughts

(billford always happens and they always break up. ford was obsessed when bill was his muse, then bill is obsessed after they’re no longer together and he realizes what he lost) (this dynamic is just canon, really)

(fiddauthor is always present at some point but in one route they end up together after canon events, and in another route fidd moves on) (it’s possible that they had a thing in college but consider it “typical college experimentation” because it’s the 70s and denial is strong. they still go through canon events)

(fiddlestan only happens during the fiddlestan route. otherwise canon events stay the same and they barely actually interact with each other. in the fiddlestan route they work together in the 80s and grow old together)

(billstan isn’t really romantic but it is a one-sided obsession. bill just can’t stop obsessing over the stans… for very different reasons…) (dare i say an unrequited kismesis dynamic?)

(ford and stan are brothers. that’s it. leave them out of the shipping dynamics.)

(fiddlebill isn’t really included here but i feel like the only way this would happen is if bill was possessing ford and wanted to fuck with fidd by using his crush on ford against him) (this one’s basically only possible if it’s fiddauthor-adjacent)

[unspuncreature]

The things Anakin would do for this man. Nothing was too depraved. Nothing too base. The older man had no idea what power he held. Anakin would raze this city if he asked. Reshape the stars. He would give him anything––anything, if his Master would only carve out a piece of himself and let Anakin rest there.

Some scattered laughter sounded in the distance, and for the second time that night, Obi-Wan was pulling away from him.

“No, Anakin,” he said, his tone final. “No.” And with that, he walked off, leaving Anakin panting in the dark.

from ch 4 of That’s My Type by @teaandjumpers

this fic has me gnashing my teeth and barking. the entire work has been rotating in my mind like a gas station hot dog for weeks. i love it so much. i couldn’t rest until i threw a little smthn together for this scene

no-background ver under the cut

[bibbsy]

failed kiss attempt

[heshemejoshi]

brand new body

[icara-mack]

happy 25th birthday techno, not a day goes by where the world doesn’t miss you. o7 rest in power

I’ve heard of a sky with a thousand suns

Just beyond a veil.

I’m told the wonder’s beyond reproach

And our world - but a mirror - seems pale.

You left to see those thousand suns

That cast the heaven’s light.

There are no shadows in that world, just endless sunlit skies.

So when my star grows old and pale

And burns out like a lamp

I’ll join you in that land of suns and see you once again.

Here are the closeups, tumblr did in fact eat the original lmao

[whosbian]

i couldn’t pick which fit them better so here’s both… thoschei constantly on the brain

[sleepsi]

Something I drew in the @daycarefriendpickup ‘s magma! Also I don’t think I’ve spent so long drawing in one day before, this one took a longgggg time.

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: dismemberment / ]

I think a lot about how Leo’s rescue could have easily ended in him losing a leg as the portal snaps shut on the Krang still clutching the limb, or, alternatively, only having Leo’s right arm make it out, still held dearly in his brother’s hand as the rest of Leo is left behind. (The latter hits even harder, as it directly parallels his future self in the worst of ways.)

I think a lot about how so many things could have gone wrong during the course of the movie with even a little bit of a change, but it really is harrowing how much of a coin-flip the entirety of the Prison Dimension rescue was.

[cerealmonster15]

walks into the function wearing a tshirt that says ASK ME ABOUT MY TOXIC THIRD YEARS POLYCULE HEADCANONS

this map has been stewing in my mind for years i think and i finally wrote it down in the illegible spaghetti way that i always do let's GO

lilia is not in the polycule he's just playing his own game of collecting sons. everyone is his son. he's also going to watch the drama because who doesn't love a soap opera playing out in real life he's got front row seats to the divorce vortex.

cater/trey/rook/vil are the ultimate four way polycule but also oh god theres so much going on there.

cater and trey are a ride or die duo but also trey knows cater sometimes isnt completely open with him but trey has a very passive nature to him as we've seen in book 1 and when he mentions cater's wish to himself in the starsending event... but theyre still close and care for each other a lot and i will die defending them if i have to fjdklsjfds

rook and vil oh my god rook and vil. they are so married. and so dramatic. and so. sdkfjsdkljf a little divorced because rook is also in love with the biggest rival of vils life but that is NOT enough to break their marriage. love finds a way. somehow. fdskjfjksdlg

^ i could go much more into both those duos but we simply. we dont have time we are moving along we are walking

rook and trey beloved science weirdos oh my god every time theyre on screen together theyre so funny. i love odd friendships. science marriage real.

cater canonically flirted with vil even tho it got somewhat censored in engtwst and was partially probably for clout reasons HOWEVER, to ME it's also for bisexual reasons. vil is canonically very pretty and caters like yeah 🧡🧡🧡 vil can see through when cater's being more superficial BUT ALSO they have genuine moments of getting along!!! like in events, beanfest 2 and the puppet one that's not out in eng yet. no spoilers here but there is a bit in puppet event that has me so vindicated on how they really do work well together and respect each other!!!!!!! into the polycule you go.

vil and trey,,, gestures to vil's lab coat story klsdjflksd they get along and it's cute. everybody loves trey.

even leona wants trey in the divorce polycule. no spoilers but please see playful land puppet event / leona's card vignette for that event. and also i think treys platinum birthday card story sljdflksdjf

the extreme difference between how malleus reacts to cater bothering him vs rook bothering him or even just Talking To Lilia is so funny. like he gets along with rook sometimes but in those two pe scenes hes SO aggro he wants that twink OBLITERATED he is going to KILL ROOK HUNT. but he will play tag with cater :^)

leona is the king of divorce. he is divorced to everyone he touches . he invented divorce. he's turbo divorced with vil and malleus because he and vil are just sooooooo. fsdkjfskdlg when therye on screen together it's like passive aggressive but mostly just aggressive bitching and bullying. theyre so funny. they have this energy of like "we have Tension but also i am going to kill you. i begrudgingly respect your abilities but i will only say so with layered insults." like the way vil says "so leona's got a pretty face but that's ALL he has going for him" like. multiple times. why does he keep doing that.

and then whatever he has going on with malleus is so funny. like malleus seems like hes a smug little bitch having fun with the banter [again he wants to Destroy Rook in those PE stories, but leona's blatant insults i feel like he's more teehee you stupid bitch >:)] and leona's just so pissed mad angry forever he's like no i need this dragon fucker DEAD for EXISTING !!! but i think malleus' having fun with the fellow teen experience of stupid razzing

leona and cater are giving me subtle divorced vibes in that one scene in book 2. listen. i have headcanons. ive talked about it. moving on 🚶

rook. leona. i feel i do not need to elaborate jfklsjfkljsekljfkl

idia is so funny. why are his opinions about everyone around him either "oh god hes ultra tier scary" or "he's so sparkly dazzling handsome beautiful". he does this often with no filter and it's so funny. i like that he and leona played chess for like hours or whatever in that one birthday vignette but i forget which one lol i think it was idia's union bday or something

do i have more to say. ive been thinking about them for hours and also years. i can and will talk about them forever i think they are So funny. this is just a messy summary of it all i'm barely scratching the surface i simply cannot go into full detail or this post will Never End GOODBYE!!!!

[lunar-years]

Now why would she…

[deanofsam]

it just occurred to me that some of you might have missed seeing american football player joe burrow’s suit this past june during paris fashion week, and it is my personal opinion that everyone see these images at least once in their lifetime, especially those of us with a shared interest in slutty clothes on men (fictional or otherwise). so here they are.