#sitcom life

[raethereptile]

My grandma lost her false tooth 2 days ago, and we all looked freaking everywhere for it. And I mean everywhere. First in the logical places, then in the slightly less obvious places, then the it's not going to be there but let's check anyway places, and then the bins.

Anyway I had the pleasure of finding it this evening. In the kettle.

Yep.

Inside. The. Kettle.

Which led to this stellar interaction:

Me: ...so who's had a cuppa up here in the last 2 days?

*8 different family members all raised their hands*

Aunty's partner: let's never speak of this again

[alarmsofmyheart]

I just realised I watched only three parts of last thame po episode

[internetgreatesthits]

[egophiliac]

ENG PLAYERS I BESEECH YOU

I have been informed that you guys are getting part 4 of episode 7 tomorrow, which means we are FINALLY going to get the official romanization of Revaan's name, somebody please tell me because I need to know what it is.

like, yes, it's probably just Revan/Levan, but look, I'm sitting here with my finger over the button of all these Laverne and Shirley jokes and just waiting for the opportunity to deploy them --

[awiltedkissofdeath]

sometimes i just wanna yk *passes out and wakes up in a dream 5 mins later* because that's like the dream life?? and the dream life has me and my bf in it and we're just a sitcom couple vibing yk??

[eefaevie]

We Shall Have the World Forever For Our Own by @quitequaintrelle (M, 63.7k, complete)

Starting at Crowley’s jawline, Aziraphale lays a chain of kisses down the column of his neck, ending at the pair of dark red marks the precise shape of Aziraphale’s pursed mouth in the groove above Crowley’s collarbone.

“I do hope you keep these for a good long while,” Aziraphale says as he gently prods the marks with his nose.

Crowley’s breath streams in a drawn-out hiss of pleasure. A plaintive whimper clambers up and out of his mouth as Aziraphale smiles broadly against his throat.

“If you want me… want me to wear a turtleneck more often, you can ask,” Crowley whines. Aziraphale’s tongue has poked out to skirt around the borders of the love bites.

It’s still a delightful novelty—the asking and the answering.

“I do adore your turtlenecks, so handsome…” Aziraphale nudges the neckline of Crowley’s dressing gown aside to bare more skin, marking a path with kisses as he goes. “Though, it might also be great fun to flaunt a bit, see the looks on everyone’s faces at the Christmas market grand opening.”

excerpt from chapter 8, Autumn Rhythm (It Ends as It Started)

happy (MUCH belated) birthday to my darling @quitequaintrelle ! you are hilarious, wonderful, and kind, and I’m so grateful to be your friend! thank you for always being there to think of silly ideas together, going on Real People outings with me, and letting me have the honour of beta reading your amazing fics early 😘 I hope you like it!! ❤️❤️

for more scenes of domestic intimacy and celestial beings Making Problems On Purpose, you should read we shall have the world forever for our own. It’s genuinely excellent 🫶

[allthingstv]

The Suite Life Of Zac & Cody

somebody tell them their reservation is ready please!

[emilyjunk]

"Kevin isn't that bad it's not like he beats her, why does she need to kill him or fake her death, just get divorced" you are the point of the show, you are missing the crucial reveal. Allison sees Kevin in every single scene as she does their last scene together, but we as the audience aren't privy to that and we only see sitcom Kevin which is Kevin's self perception. He is not suddenly becoming scary and threatening to her. He was like that the whole time. We only see Allison's feelings about Kevin and the aftermath of her interactions with Kevin -- this is the ONLY time we see Kevin from her POV except for the brief initial breaking of the sitcom cam. Every other time we see Kevin on screen it's from Kevin's POV. Even after she cuts her hand we only see the bandage in her singular pov when she is away from kevin, but when it shifts back to sitcom Kevin it's gone.... We do not see the reality of her interactions with Kevin, that's the point of the show!!! Because when Kevin is on screen, it's Kevin's world! We only see Kevin from anyone else's lens in ONE scene at the end, which is when Allison decides to leave, so yes the sitcom cam "softens his abuse" but it also just fully acts as an unreliable narration because we never literally see Kevin from anyone else's POV until the series finale so every time Kevin is on screen it isn't even an accurate portrayal of what's happening, it's Kevin's perception of what's happening. Allison has viewed him like that the entire show, we as the audience just did not get to witness that POV until the end

[halflifebutawesome]

redraw i didn’t finish in time for Halloween… SIGHS.. you can have it now tho 🧡

[jewish-joy]

Embarrassingly, I woke up to check if anyone had commented on my Conclave fanfiction and instead found out the pope died.

[thhouseofblack]

neoptolemus, telemachus, peisistratus, hermione, polycaste, electra, orestes, and pylades – now that's a chaotic friend group I need a sitcom of.

[arcadia-smith]

My sweet life Ep3

Moodboard/Masterlist

Pairing: Simon Riley x Fem!Reader.

Summary: Navigating everyday life with Simon Riley. Sitcom-style fanfiction.

Word count: 495

Tags: @candlelight-reading

Previous episode // Next episode

“How’s it going?” Price asked as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

“Fine,” Simon muttered. “Except for the part where Riley tried to rip the missus apart.” His eyes flicked toward the K9, now curled up peacefully.

It had been about a week since Simon brought Riley home. For the most part, things were fine—so long as Simon was around. Riley behaved, staying in his designated space in the laundry room and at night Simon made sure to lock the door, keeping the dog from wandering.

But then, one night, you had gotten up for a glass of water. As you stood by the counter, a strange weight settled over you—the distinct feeling of being watched.

You turned.

Riley sat at the kitchen entrance, ears perked, eyes locked onto you.

You weren’t afraid of him, not exactly. But you were wary. It was clear Riley had decided you ranked low in his pack order.

“You’d be cuter if you didn’t stare at me like that,” you murmured, setting your glass down.

The moment you took a step toward the door, Riley moved, ears pricked forward as a low growl rumbled deep in his chest, lips curling back to reveal sharp teeth.

Your arms shot up instinctively as you stumbled back. “Easy, Riley,” you whispered, voice shaking.

But Riley wasn’t backing down. His hackles bristled, tail raised in a rigid line of dominance. He stayed low, muscles tensed, weight shifting like he was ready to pounce.

Panic surged through you.

A scream tore from your chest "Simon!"

And for once yiu were glad your fiancè was a light sleeper.

It took him five seconds to bolt from bed to the kitchen.

What he saw made his blood run cold.

Riley, locked in a silent, predatory stare. And you—trembling, wide-eyed, frozen in place. Simon had never seen you this scared. Not even when you chased down the guy who had stolen your purse the day you both met.

“Riley.” Simon’s voice was sharp and commanding “Stand down.”

The transformation was instant. Riley’s posture relaxed as he turned to Simon, trotting over and sitting obediently at his feet like nothing had happened.

Like he’d already forgotten you.

Simon exhaled slowly "Go back to bed," he said, his voice calm as he addressed you.

He watched as you swallowed hard and edged around the kitchen, keeping as much distance from Riley as possible before disappearing down the hall. Only when he heard the bedroom door click shut, he shifted his focus to the dog sitting at his feet.

"The fuck was that about?" He crouched down. Simon ran a hand over his head, exhaling sharply. He'd trained dogs before, he knew how they thought, how they operated within a pack structure. And Riley had just made one thing very clear—he didn't see you as part of it.

"You don't get to pull that shit in my house," Simon warned before dragging Riley back to the laundry room.

[nordidia]

raphie doodles from a rage filled day

(first one is the only kinda /srs one, u can laugh i promise bc if this wasnt me i'd laugh my ass off /pos) i had to project. also i love my friends sorry i yelled at yall xx

just period thingz... surely it has nothing to do with my genuine anger issues. no its just all hormones i promise guys. trust.

its a little pathetic i was genuinely warm inside and inches away from trashing my desk for ZERO FUCKING REASON. WHY?!?! WHAT THE FUCKAEHNGHJSDAGHAH send me to hell im begging

that second panel is something i actually do irl to iben when i need him to stfu so fucking immediately and he has dubbed it "the jojo stare" and its so fucking funny until i need him to stfu so fucking immediately (he drew this one time when i did it at him)

[chawliekin]

and if I said that dennis’ insistence on being the breadwinner/provider despite literally being a pampered princess who dgaf about traditional roles of masculinity in every other regard (aside from ego) is because his mom only stayed with/chose frank for his wealth and dennis is highly aware that he’s difficult to love and unable to show his emotions openly so he has to be contributing something to the relationship materially in order to feel like he’s worth staying for… and mac grew up with parents who were extremely ambivalent to him and eachother so he has to overcompensate by proving his worth at every given moment and seeking praise/validation from people (and religious icons) who will never demonstrate the same amount of dedication to him but he has no idea how else to desperately keep himself close to those he loves other than by eroding himself into something they’ll approve of… dear god they’re both exactly what the other needs — someone who can’t and won’t leave them even if they try — and they don’t even see it…

[wordswithkittywitch]

I admit that in the past I've been quite scatty

They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a mess

But every now and then, though I can't promise when

I successfully work through all my stress, true! Yes!

And I fortunately know a little secret

It's a technique that I've recently acquired

And now lately, I'll admit, if I should feel like shit

Verklempt or overwhelmed or just plain tired--pathetic!

Small achievable goals!

[holyfuckinshitleto]

FRIENDS - 4.20 The One With All The Wedding Dresses

1994 - 2004 | dir. David Crane & Marta Kauffman