#should i get diagnosed??
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THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!!
I took two quizzes few days ago...and I took one today which was like WHO ARE YOU WRITTEN BY... something like that ...and I get I AM A GIRL WITH UNDIAGNOSED AUTISM....and for the other two quizzes....GUESS WHAT???.....I SHOW SIGNS WHICH IF DIAGNOSED PROPERLY CAN SHOW THAT I AM AUTISTIC.....I Am SoRrY WhAT???....
#random#rambles#funny#this is news to me#am i autistic#i never knew it#đđđ#should i get diagnosed??
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i think everyone who's ever had migraines should be financially compensated forever btw
#camera talks#disability stuff#this is for my chronic migraine girlies (gn) <3#i think we should all get 1 million million dollars everyday actually#this is the worst fucking night of my life (everytime i have migraines) (specifically rn tho)#chronic pain#chronic migraine#migraines#chronically ill#disabled#disclaimer because idk Iâve got a lot of notes on this#I have diagnosed chronic migraines. I used to have them 5-6 times a week#now with medication on a good week Iâll only be affected 2-3 days#on bad weeks itâs much worse#anyways donât doubt my condition I know what Iâm talking about thx
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"ok but are you diagnosed" what are you a cop.
#reminder that being diagnosed as autistic/ otherwise disabled is meant to help YOU.#if abled ppl expect u to justify every little thing u say abt ur experiences as (insert disability) they should explode#also if you dont wanna get officially diagnosed bc it will make your life harder no one will judge you. if they do theyre assholes#actuallyautistic#actually autistic#autism#autistic#autism pride#adhd#actually adhd#actuallyadhd#only tagging this as adhd and autism bc its all I am. however this can be about Literally any disability
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Idk I really dont know what im doing, im getting too hyper
#venom#venom 3#eddie brock#venom the last dance#we are venom#someone sedate me#i think i have issues#someone should get me diagnosed for adhd
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hey guys if i see another billdip vs billford poll i might ram my fist through my head <3 in fact can we stop with the comparison altogether lol. CLEARLY theyre the same but also completely different weâve all elaborated enough on that. idc which one u like they both equally suck because bill is the worst. now lets go back to making whichever one we like better (for some weird unknowable reasons) kiss in our heads and go about our day. PLEASE
#billdip#not tagging the other ones cuz theyre mean to us#but listen i truly dont care. canon not canon WHO CARESSSSS ITS A FUCKING TRIANGLE#âits pedophiliaâ please go outside for once in ur life genuinely im worried about u#i think we should worry less about which ship is better and more about what shipping either says about our mental state#im betting 90% of us grew up with a narcissistic parent LMAO#ok enough diagnosing i wont waste my degree here#but seriously excuse my harsh tone this is all in good fun#i like making fun of how absurd this is#tldr we all need therapy and also our favorite ship is based#i am a billdip tho for life theyre my bread and butter and if u dont understand Well. u just werent meant to. but trust me its glorious#i wish u could get it#canon is as real as these characters are. meaning its not
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hey, it's me! i'm still alive, somehow, though just barely. this semester has been pretty tough so far and will probably remain that way until spring. despite this, i managed to add some fun new features. : ) ALSO i promise 100000% that if you sent me an ask i WILL answer it. i will. anyway, look at all those cool things! -> a system for cuts, bruises, tattoos, wounds and other decorations your whumpee's skin is an empty canvas. whether you fill it with scars and wounds or cutesy band aids is up to you!
the way this is set up is kind of like a bunch of stickers. so for example, if you decide to hurt the lil' guy with something sharp, he'll get a "stab wound" sticker in the spot you decided to target. over time, that sticker will change over to a "stab scar" one. it's a very flexible way to do things, but it still needs some work and a couple big changes, since it's very unfriendly to low-end computers. in terms of visuals though, it should look exactly the same as the decal-based "decorations" for your whumpee that you see above!
- a better way of getting that dude on camera the camera system is now a lot more immersive and will fit the story. the awkward developer cam that could clip into walls is no more.
you can drag around the view and zoom in and out by scrolling. as you progress, you'll get access to even more ways to invade your whumpee's privacy. : )
-> new ways to get horny in the last devlog post (around 1000 years ago) i said that you won't see any "horny accessories" in the upcoming updates. that was a complete lie, sorry! here's a preview of some cool new horns you can give to your whumpee.
the neat part is that the horns are customizable - other than just choosing the shape, you can modify their size and color gradient. -> other stuff + story i've made plenty of changes and additions to the back end. most of it is not flashy or super significant - most of the time and energy i could dedicate to the project went right into fueling the violent, bloody conflict between me and custom shader code. i've also made some updates to how time is simulated and fixed a bunch of bugs. there is now a sound system too! i'll look for some copyright-free sfx and music before the next update. oh, and there's some lore too!
i've been experimenting with different ways of delivering the main storyline. heavily stylized cutscene-like sequences were very fun to do! not sure if i'll stick with this style though. either way, i have the general outline of something that resembles a plot. >: ) that's it for now! again, sorry for the irregular update schedule. i've been following the "no progress for a long time, then one night you have all the energy and inspiration in the world and you zone the fuck out for an unhealthy amount of time just working on your thing then until realize that you're going to be asleep within the next 40 seconds" development strategy - hopefully, my brain will kindly allow me to switch to a more comfortable workflow. :' ) taglist below: (let me know if you want to be added OR LET ME KNOW IF I FORGOT TO ADD YOU IM SO SORRY) @whumpinthepot @andithewhumper @pigeonwhumps @monarchthefirst @scp-1296 @whumpedydump @screenys-whump-corner @whumpshaped @bloodsweatandpotato @burning-and-remembering @thealmightyconeoftruth @whimpity-whumpity @catnykit @vietbluecoeur @rainythealias @cardboardarsonist @snakebites-and-ink @lthrboy @woo-lu-woo @wingsofadragonsstuff @wecoffphm @bayvel @pics-and-fanfics @dokidokisadness @generic-whumperz @lambetjenasus @aarika-merrill @hayaneakabane @moons-cozy-corner @brittaunfiltered09 @rule-masochism @reverie1234 @oddsconvert @wh-wh-whumpified @currentlyinthesprial @cupcakes-and-pain @heavenlyden @whumpsday @likeadeadbattery @stay-on-topic1 @cyborg0109 @kawhump @astrowhump
#whumpdev#whump community#whump art#whump game#whumblr#whump#this took forever SORRY#there's still so much more to do but i'm really excited to start implementing new stuff#i gotta get myself a trello board with features or something#or anything that resembles a plan tbh#planning is hard but you know what is even harder? sticking to a plan#and that difficulty SKYROCKETS if its a plan you made yourself#man idk i gotta check if i don't have adhd or something i feel like this might not be the way an adult brain should operate#ill do some research later if i don't forget??? i'm always so skeptical of thinking to myself âi might have this disorderâ#cuz i feel like i'm super hardcore prone to some weird bias and i wouldn't trust my own brain to diagnose itself#i don't trust that fucker in general
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#meme#homemade memes#cw dysphoria#trans#bones are stupid#cw dysphoria venting#waiting out current phase of transition changes to happen#(cause I got my dose raised again in april & am waiting for my next two surgeries & continuing tryna build muscle đ)#hoping it'll get to a point eventually where the affirming bits are overpowering enough to ppl's perception#that I can dress the bits I can't change (like hips) in things that suit them#and do the whole embracing looking trans thing without worrying abt the misgendering#but alas I won't believe in my body's ability to do that until I see it#seeing as I still get lady-ed & unquestioningly she/her-ed 5 years into HRT + post two highly visible surgeries#+ fully dressed in men's clothes + sporting the shortest hair I've ever had -.-#cis ppl learn what transmascs look like & what that means for words you use on them challenge 2024- difficulty level: impossible apparently#I've had several ppl in the last few months that I literally TOLD I am trans/'it's he/him'/was clocked as trans by#who then STILL proceeded to misgender me anyway???#like what more can I do than literally straight up tell you????#I told a clinician who was looking at my knee the other month that I was trans (cause they always ask abt all meds n diagnoses)#and he misgendered me as a trans woman on his report like-#sir I am 5'4" and have a flat chest baby face and facial hair#and I was telling you abt how I've been on HRT for years and have had several Transgender Surgeries#you're a bone doctor you know how bones work and what their limitations are and you have functionning eyes#you should be able to put 2 and 2 together abt how this works even if you've never met a trans person holy fuck#(I wrote a complaint and they amended the report and sent me an apology meanwhile but still like- buddy wtf)
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i think everybody should think about how much of a privilege driving is before they judge people who donât drive for being immature or whatever. like do you not realize that not everyone had a high school with driverâs ed or parents/older relatives who could teach them, not everyone had time to learn when they were younger, not everyone can afford a car and car insurance and any repairs that a car might need, not everyone lives in a place that is drivable anyway, and not everyone has good vision or a healthy enough brain and/or body to drive. and nobody needs to explain to you why they donât drive! all you need to know is that the canât, donât want to, or it doesnât make sense for them at this current time in their lives. fuck off!!!!! the response to inadequate public transportation isnât that everyone should drive instead!!!!!! also everybody complains about bad drivers but people are incentivized to drive regardless of their actual driving ability because itâs shameful not to drive even if itâs a personal choice. and like maybe some people are just not self aware about their own driving abilities but some people just donât understand that they are in control of a large machine that is dangerous if they donât operate it properly and they have to be more responsible for the people theyâre putting at risk because they donât care enough to pay attention or follow the rules of the road or keep their tempers under control while theyâre behind the wheel. anyway not everyone can or should drive, thatâs all
#apropos of nothing i just was thinking about how judgmental my ex and her friends were in college that i didnât drive#and i was not as bothered by that as i shouldâve been lol#because i was low key deeply embarrassed about it so i thought it was kind of fair that they were being dicks about it#it was mostly this one guy. i tried to explain my reasoning but he just didnât get it and kept pushing that it was dumb not to drive#and like. yeah sometimes it can be limiting but for most of my day to day life itâs not a problem at all#having a car would be a bigger problem to figure out rn#anyway ânow i think he should just go to hell#he was kind of judgmental a lot actually and had a pretty big ego imo with no reason to be that self centered#my ex was kind of egotistical too but at least she was an extremely interesting and bright individual#it was grating that she thought she was the most interesting person in the room all the time but she actually was lol#anyway. whatever this isnât about her itâs about ME and not driving#itâs not gonna happen until i have enough money for a car and time to learn how to drive#and probably not until i actually get assessed (+ treated if diagnosed) for adhd bc my biggest fear is being a distracted driver#if anyone has a problem with that they can suck my dick#anyway. anyway.#thatâs all i guess#i fucking hate drivers rn the drivers in my city are nuts
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there's something undiagnosed plaguing me but going and getting evaluated sounds like a hassle so I'm just gonna side eye it suspiciously for now
#shitpost#looking at my behaviors like what ARE you#this could indicate a few different things and I don't know which#also this post is open to physical diagnoses as well#because there's also a potential physical thing i'm like hmm. i should probably at least ask about that. about#anyway. if you see me get more mentally ill dw about it it's fine
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Someone just told me they think Iâm autistic. This is the 27th person who told me that.
Anyhoo Bobret the silly :3
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I know a lot of people like the "all synths are autistic" thing and i understand, but the idea that they intentionally made Danse like that is so fucking funny to me, and the idea that X6-88 just ended up like that is even fucking funnier
#danse gets diagnosed somehow and has a fucking fit#YOU COULD HAVE MADE ME A PERFECT SPECIMEN#WHY DID YOU MAKE ME HATE CERTAIN TEXTURES AND BAD WITH EYE CONTACT??? WHAT THE FUCK#I COULD HAVE BEEN A FUNCTIONAL ADULT BUT NO. NO. INSTEAD I SAY WEIRD SHIT AND CANT TALK TO PEOPLE#meanwhile x6 gets diagnosed and is like yes? and?#call it whatever you want. you wish you were me#a perfect specimen. flawless in every way#perhaps they should make more synths like danse and i#(danse losing his last marble in the background)#fallout 4#fo4#paladin danse#X6-88
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Hannibal currently in co-con watching me fuck up while making boxed spaghetti for dinner:
#did fictive#did alter#did stuff#did things#actually did#traumagenic did#diagnosed did#why is this my life#get me out of here#hannibal#hannibal lecter#hannibal nbc#nbc hannibal#hannibal shitpost#hannibal fictive#haha iâm in danger#embarrassing#fml#this is a serious disorder but i do have funny moments#should i keep sharing these#he keeps me entertained tbh
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Feel like making people miserable today. Anyways, here's Gon experiencing like. Textbook symptoms of trauma in the CAA, in case there was any lingering doubt about this or anything:
Initial denial that the experience happened or was traumatic
[ID: A screenshot from episode 85 of HxH 2011. Gon, eyes bright and with a smile, says "Kite is alive!" End ID.]
Flashbacks
[ID: Two screenshots from episode 95, and a third from episode 110. In the first, Kite's arm is shown in the foreground, bleeding and blurred. In the second, a close of Pitou's wide eyes, looking animalistic. In the last, puppet Kite's mangled and scarred face stares emptily ahead - the scene is greyed out. End ID.]
Intense distress at real or symbolic reminders of the trauma
[ID: Two screenshots from episode 116. In the first, Gon's fist can be seen in the foreground, with Pitou shielding an unconscious Komugi just barely seen. The narrator says "The girl lying before them brought back". In the second, Komugi has a medical respirator on. The narrator continues "images of a broken Kite to Gon's mind". End ID.]
Physical sensations such as pain, sweating, nausea or trembling
[ID: A screenshot from episode 116. Gon's fists slam into the ground as he says "That isn't fair...". Sweat drips down his arms. End ID.]
Extreme alertness/hypervigilance
[ID: A screenshot from episode 116. Part of Pitou can be seen in the foreground as Gon stares at them intensely, crouched on the ground with his arm resting on his knee, obscuring his lower face. End ID.]
Angry outbursts or other extreme behaviour
[ID: Two screenshots, one from episode 116, and the other from episode 127. In the first, Gon shouts "Is something wrong with you?!" as his face contorts with rage. His aura floats black around him. In the second, Gon, his face shadowed eerily with thin lines, says "The next time you try to delay me, I'll kill her." End ID.]
Feeling like you have to keep busy
[ID: A screenshot from episode 94. A close up of Gon's face from the side as he says "I want to focus on my training." End ID.]
Doing things that are reckless and self-destructive
[ID: Three screenshots, one from episode 95 and the other two from episode 131. The first is stylized as a black outline of Gon's figure over a background like parchment or a projector - he's been hit in the face and sent to the right from the force of the blow. The second is a close up of Gon's face, almost completely shadowed, with intense and vacant eyes - he says "I don't care". The third continues with a close up of his eye filling with darkness - "if this is the end..." End ID.]
Feeling like nobody understands ("since it means nothing to you")
[ID: A screenshot from episode 116. In a whitish-room with a crack on the wall between them, Gon stands ahead of Killua, facing away from him. They are both in shadow. End ID.]
Ignoring offers of help and shutting out loved ones... poor Killua :(
[ID: A screenshot from episode 136. A spotlight on both Killua, in the foreground, and Gon, walking away from him in the background. Killua thinks "I wanted you to ask for my help in defeating Pitou!" End ID.]
Self-loathing, self-punishment, and lack of self regard
[ID: Three screenshots, two from episode 110 and the third from episode 131. The first is a close up of Gon's face over Morel asking "When would you try to hurt yourself?" The second is a continuation. Morel looks down at Gon who is facing away from the camera as Gon replies "When I couldn't forgive myself." In the last, adult Gon, staring ahead, is animated in black and white with the only colour being the blood from the stump of his right arm. His left hand grips his shoulder. End ID.]
Blaming yourself for what happened
[ID: Two screenshots, one from episode 95 and the other from episode 130. In the first, Gon hugs puppet Kite around his waist. In the second, Gon stares blankly ahead with tears streaming down his face as he thinks "I killed Kite." End ID.]
Overwhelming feelings of anger, sadness, guilt, and shame
#all this wasn't going to fit into my gon analysis but i still wanted to cover it#when i say he was genuinely traumatized i. actually seriously mean that.#note that this does NOT mean he had ptsd!!! ptsd should only be diagnosed if symptoms continue for several weeks to a month#after being removed from the traumatic situation#given that the trauma was ongoing this does not count! we could only say he has ptsd if somehow these symptoms persist when#he's back on whale island after the fact. but honestly i doubt they would#however. in caa? yeah 100% he was very traumatized by kite's death#hence all the trauma symptoms i listed above. poor little guy :(#storyrambles#hxh#gon freecss#this post hurt me to make btw. ow. ow.#i also. cruel as it is i genuinely like that gon's trauma fueled breakdown was. not palatable. like he is genuinely really scary there#and it's REALLY hard to watch and listen to#i really get why killua felt so helpless there.#like. your best friend is incredibly fucking volatile and very obviously wants to and is intending to run himself into the ground#because he feels he deserves it#what the hell is the other thirteen year old supposed to do here. :(#random thoughts
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I think antipsychotics would fix yukio okumura
#Is this a weird thing to say?#Idk when i started headcanoning him to have psychosis of some kind#That any sort of hallucinations or erratic behavior would be brushed aside#Also yukio is the masking king#Its prolly only after hes among peers that he realizes something might be wrong#Btw this is not a bad thing i think yukio should be causally psychotic#yukio okumura#blue exorcist#ao no exorcist#I just noticed i deleted one of my tags at some point#I ment i think it would be hard for him to get diagnosed cuz yukio spent his whole childhood saying he saw demons#So if he actually has hallucinations he prolly wouldnt tell anyone natsume yuujinchou style#Anyway insert this as the 3rd tag pleasee
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we as a society don't adequately address how physically, emotionally, and mentally hard the menstrual cycle is on a woman's body and we really should be talking about this
#for all the ladies#menstruation#menstrual cycle#periods#period talk#not fandom#it's always oh you'll be fine in a few days#never how can i help? what do you need?#we brush it off bc âit just happensâ#when we really need to be addressing how bad it can get#and also how if it's so bad you can't fucking move THAT IS NOT NORMAL AND YOU SHOULD SEE A HEALTH PROFESSIONAL#speaking as someone who only got diagnosed with pcos after years of hell periods#we need to talk about this
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actually lloyd deciding that his last words would be dedicated to calling javier bitchless and alicia noona is so funny and iconic of him. he said "i'm gonna go down exactly as i lived. being a pain in the ass to javier and disrespecting the monarchy" and i think that's beautiful <3
#i talk a lot <3#tged#the greatest estate developer#lloyd frontera#i've said it before and i'll say it again#the ideal dynamic between lloyd and javier should be them just constantly going at each other like#'i diagnose you with gets no bitches' 'oh please preach me from your ivory tower of zero hoes' 'do you want to kiss'#and this is the closest i'll probably get so its in my top ten favorite moments akdjskdjks
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