#shit genuinely sucks but oh well
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me when i mera mera (other ver under cut)
they’re so gay i hate them.
#milgram#milgram fanart#shidou kirisaki#kazui mukuhara#0507#kazushidou#guy who is dazzling x guy who is dazzled#took inspo from gira gira#dazzle dazzle shine shine#used a lot of fruity colors huh#i also really like the fish i drew that’s a nice fish#soryr i’m ao out of it cuz or the presidentiql election i qqctually hate everything#0507 n my friends are one of the only things keeping me going#shit genuinely sucks but oh well#ALSO I DIDN’T PAINT FOR ONCE!!! HIP HIP HOORAY#also it is almosy 4 am lole#chibi's art/rkgk
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its past midnight and time to yap about Mouthwashing. Anyway obviously we don't see the Specific Events only how the characters react but with Anya... Okay I'm going to talk about the Sexual Assault not with Specific Details but that's what the post is about so
Anyways she reads to me as very like... trying to downplay the severity to herself. Like thinking through it (not having the exact quotes but) I feel like it'd be an unfortunately natural reaction- if you were stuck with 4 guys and the guy with the second highest position on the ship assaulted you depending on the situation. I feel like its not hard to imagine you'd try and reframe it as Less Bad to cope because let me be honest if I had to confront the implications of that, mainly the fact he could do it again and I wouldn't have any real way of dealing with it without complicating things even further bc he doesn't just have a close relationship with the guy with the Most Power on the ship, he also is in charge of keeping Me and The Other People On The Ship Safe, i would be in deep denial just to not lose my god damn mind like thats so fucking scary. And then the implication you tried to talk to the captain and even if he wasn't cruel he didn't Understand the Severity of what you were suggesting is like. Besides feeling afraid it could genuinely really fuck with my own perception bc like "if this guy who I trust says he's not a bad person maybe I'm just overreacting?" is. Again unfortunately understandable.
And again I'll say that Anya fully breaks down when the news breaks that pony express is fucked and like. 1. I think that's related to her own finances (and also. Literally just realized the way an abortion could interact badly with "no savings" like I Just Processed that fact. Like I knew "oh if she couldn't abort having to support a child wouldn't just be traumatic but also fucking nightmarish finance wise" but even having an abortion could make things so much harder.) 2. Jimmy LASHES OUT at Curly OPENLY. again based on my interpretation of Mildly In Denial To Cope this would. Like. Really fuck with that because it goes from "I trust the captain and I don't want to be afraid of my crewmate for a year" to "oh he is willing to verbally abuse the captain, who is his friend" and realizing I wasn't overreacting.
I also wanna point to the dead pixel conversation and obv it's symbolic but idk if it's meant as "there's a dead pixel that Anya noticed and she's using the topic to like test the waters" or if it's "anya is literally just trying to figure out Curly's thought process" which isn't like super important but like. Focusing on the way she starts the conversation by saying that she "Likes the illusion the screen has". (I don't remember the exact words sorry) But that's really interesting to me bc obviously you can read into Curly not seeing the dead pixel and instead focusing on the bigger picture (and how the dead pixel "doesn't ruin the illusion") but I think it's really interesting that Anya starts by talking Positively about the screen even though the dead pixel is there (and she can't stop thinking about it)
Like thinking through implications option 1: she's talking about the screen and uses the dead pixel to get a feel for how Curly responds to her bringing up issues
2: she's being entirely metaphorical and still trying to sort of self soothe- seeking external validation that the dead pixel Isn't Actually That Big A Deal (and therefore she's just overthinking)
3: idk how to phrase this exactly but ppl have talked Abt the way she talks to Jimmy, how it indicates a sort of "Fawn" response where she tries to keep him calm with compliments and stuff, and her talking about "enjoying the illusion" is her trying to do something similar with Curly- essentially starting the metaphor by downplaying the issue
Anyway. I don't know if I have a full conclusion but another thing is I think ppl need to acknowledge that while Curly fucked up and harmed Anya (mainly thru inaction). He's not uniquely shitty. Most people will be in a situation where they act similarly, and that DOES NOT JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS. I AM NOT SAYING CURLY IS ANY BETTER. I am saying that you need to be able to recognize your capacity for harm thru inaction and understand that like. He's not uniquely terrible he's just Normal Levels Of Unhelpful, which in a situation like Anya's is Dangerous
Like. Basically you can say "fuck jimmy fuck curly" all you want but you need to be able to understand that everyone including yourself has the same capacity for harm
#Mouthwashing spoilers#Rape ment#SA ment#Ask to tag#Idk I will say with the Anya thing: I'm a little bit speaking from personal experience#Of. There are things that I think about like ''ppl say These Things (that I experienced) are Very Bad but I don't think that's the case#For me'' like. Not consciously ''oh I'm over reacting'' but more ''well maybe my situation is different'' and it's really hard to figure ou#How much of that is genuinely the case and how much is denial y'know. 👍#Also Curly is a trans guy to me bc I'm hungry for characters who are trans men and just as culpable of willful ignorance and harm#As cis men. Anyway if anyone has a diff take on Anya's situation and)or mindset I'm open to hear it this is just my thoughts#Based on how the scenes read to me.#Also like the situation is delicate and this isn't like A Perfect Fix but genuinely Curly should've given Anya the gun#I don't think she would've shot it but it works as a Defensive Threat in a way that would give her security and also deter jimmy from being#A fucking problem because he doesn't experience consequences for his actions due to a mix of Captain's Friend and#''we can't really do shit to him or we lose our co-pilot'' (even tho he fucking sucks at his job they don't learn that until he#Is The Captain so they likely assume he's at least fucking. Functional and they would be worse off with him out of commission. Y'know)#But then again Jimmy's allergic to responsibility and consequences to the point of murder suicide so maybe Anya wouldve had to shoot him#Idk. Imagine me pacing full of rage. Imagining a universe where Anya can just fucking go to med school and doesn't have to deal with#The pony express. FUCK THE PONY EXPRESS
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The amount of doomerism I've heard from fellow usamericn zoomers/millennials around me is starting to drive me fucking insane.
"We're all gonna die, it's hopeless, it's not worth doing anything. This is our penance as human beings/[insert other guilty identity]"
You know who you guys fucking sound like? Fucking Evangelicals.
Yeah it's fucking scary and big, I'm not trying to say it isn't. But what the fuck is your plan??? Sitting down and dying?? Are you really telling me that this world is not worth you even fucking trying?? That you're just gonna party it out until your miscellaneous end game apocalypse arrives?
This isn't the rapture. The apocalypse is a false concept. People have been living through "apocalypses" every day of their fucking lives for all of human history, especially during the past 400 years. Get up and stop the suicidal idealization of your own tragic death. Our lives in the first world are built off suffering. To lay down and say we don't have any power is to reject the duty we have as beneficiaries of that suffering.
If you are so convinced you're going to die young then die trying instead of baring your fucking throat.
#going to r/collapse pisses me off because some people are genuinely trying to do community gardens and become more self sustainable#and others are like “the third world is done for at least im safe for the time being in the first world :((((”#the “third world” isn't your fucking sacrificial lamb for climate guilt. acting like it's over for billions of people when people are tryin#to survive and innovate and prepare and help themselves is fucking selfish#and moving away from the usa may help you but everyone else is still fucking there and the us will still suck resources from everyone else#the same people who don't vote in anything and then go “oh well it was a given” when shit people get in office like babes you could've done#something about that#climate change#sorry im just pissed today. my housemate keeps saying stupid doomer shit like “hope i die before it gets too bad haha”#like we are both puerto rican don't you think our homeland is worth saving???#to be clear it doesn't have to be extreme action! its something im fighting through too#learning how to be more self sufficient outside of capitalism also conveniently means a more sustainable lifestyle!#and im not perfect at all i want to do more#but im so sick of people just accepting this shit and saying it like its a fucking joke#i get it is a coping mechanism and trust me i get sad too but like jesus christ people are eat the rich until its time to actually#think of a plan or what a survivable future might actually fucking look like and how we help each other get as close to possible.#whatv compromises we have to make until one day it's not a compromise but a goal#and yeah it might not work but i don't want to obliterate any chance of it either#what's the quote from the sophie video? “people can visualize the end of the world more then the end of capitalism”#doomerism#climate justice#gen z#generation z#millennials#climate
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"Star Wars isn't dead y'all are just haters" "Disney saved Star Wars" "It's the Woke Agenda that ruined Star Wars"
My mans, Disney single-handedly destroyed the Sequel Trilogy despite the Force Awakens being the gateway to something potentially fantastic; MCU'd the Mandalorian (a story which originally had nothing to do with the Prequel and OG Trilogy aside from sharing a universe and exploring a sect of a completely different culture/ideology); ego-boosted both Filoni and Favreau to the point where their OC Verse is not only canon but openly disregarding the Star Wars Universe Bible/Lore; gave us a snippet of what an extremely misunderstood indigenous culture is actually like (instead of portraying them as the savages one of the white leads mislabeled as animals that deserved to be slaughtered) only to then wipe out the tribe we got to know for no reason other than shock value thus alienating indigenous/poc viewers in the most disrespectful way possible; completely threw away the entire message of TCW (that being a clone does not make you incapable of being your own person who has their own thoughts, ideals, moral compass and overall identity) by making TBB (a show that does have it's strong points in set design, soundtrack orchestration and overall sound design, but is extremely weak on both characterization and storytelling because they either make the meaningful plot points stretch too thin or focus on the wrong character completely) their go to show marketed for kids instead of the actual kids programming that people shit on for being for, surprise, kids; constantly disregards valid critique from their consumers (to the point where infighting in the Fandom has gotten extremely ugly) that people either give up on interacting completely or simply vanish and take all their things with them (because no one seems to understand where these critiques come from, or how being unable to admit your special little show is imperfect is actually not a good thing for both you and others).
This isn't even accounting for the fact the Fandom seems to have doubled in it's overall toxicity since Disney took over. Which is par for the course when a mega corporation takes hold of something that started out extremely political in nature anyway. The Cash Cow machine needs feeding after all...
#Eps Talks About:#Funny enough this started as an argument between my sisters#One of which isn't a Star Wars fan and the other who is an OJ and Prequels fan#My mom (who was the one to introduce us to star wars mind you) and I watched from the sidelines#Mom didn't care because she doesn't like Modern Star Wars stuff but I ended up putting an end to the argument#My younger sister is right that Disney put too much emphasis on SELLING Star Wars to newer generations to a detrimental degree#but that doesn't mean they invalidate what came prior to their shitshow or the message SW was created to uphold#in fact Andor and SW Visions S2 made a point of being the best homages to the OJ trilogy thus far by being very political in their messages#But my older sister is also right that the state of Fandoms these days is very much a US vs THEM situation in terms of how people make#themselves heard and how meeting in the middle is virtually impossible which is very much a product of social media and how people conduct#their personal image via either genuinely expressing their feelings on certain topics or simply using them for clout#It is a case of locking yourself in a room with an 'adversary' and trying to see who can scream the loudest until someone loses their voice#I love star wars but that doesn't mean I'm blind to the fact star wars also kinda sucks lmao but oh well these are just my thoughts that#I'm letting loose because I'm already pissed off from something else going wrong today and have no patience for some of the rancid shit#that keeps cropping up in either tags or posts I find in and out of Tumblr Dot Com
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Genuinely how Hoshie is written in Atom: The Beginning is so infinitely frustrating. She's a character that really barely appears in the original series and had no backstory other than her role as Umatarō's wife and Tobio/Atom's mother, and I was so excited to learn she was in ATB. Or was until I actually read it. In ATB, she's very largely only there to appear a few times as his love interest and has really no reasoning FOR feeling that way nor any character traits outside of that. I'm still before the time skip chapter wise (and have some hope she will get more development after that time skip), but to ME to take a character that is that underdeveloped and you have an opportunity to really add a lot in there and don't? It sucks. It focuses so much more on the other characters that really do not have as much importance in the long run of the series (mostly original characters) and a lot of how the women are handled in ATB can be really rough a lot of the time (Ran as the exception, she's great, but it feels a lot of them are just there to be sexy set pieces. The way that they hyper sexualized Pink's traditional Vietnamese outfit is one of the worse examples of this (as you could write off the "sexy robot girls from Lab 1" thing as criticism of it, but in that case there really isn't much excuse to bring in) and while I'm glad it's not as prominent w Hoshie (because they quite literally draw her as a child and then have her show up later having gone through puberty, so thankfully they didn't get bad with it), it is still so bad. Like why do we have this character that is instrumental to the source material (as he said he based ATB as a sequel to Chronicles of Atom, where she is very important for that one volume and for Atom as a character after he is sold to the circus) and very not developed and all that is done w her is on par with how Naruto tried to develop romantic relationships (girl is in one sided love with the male protagonist and barely appears). You could have done so much, and so much that could have really helped develop the relationship in the future and helped flesh her out as her own characters with her own interests. She had a personality in the original and here, it is just being blushy and fawning over the protagonist and it is genuinely kind of insufferable.
#tzkposting#technically i suppose#twist rambles#the age gap shit is really rough here too but im just. god im so mad at the writing of her esp w how she like. never appears minus maybe 3-4#times in 100 chapters???#sorry. i woke up and got mad over hoshie again bc its genuinely been the worst part of this minus well. how the crossdressing is handled#which is also pretty rough imo#like. i say all of this out of love 4 the series bc i DO really enjoy it but good god. as a hoshie fan this is not fun to read lol#posts w quite literally 0 target audience but well. i needed to discuss it bc it is genuinely just rly bad a lot of the time#like the angle of oh its immature infatuation and shes idealized the perfect guy in her head even if it doesnt match up 2 him irl + the lack#of interest in her from him all could be used to rly kind of make the relationship set up to be more interesting and yet. lol. i rly hope#post time skip it gets better but honestly i kind of doubt it. i feel Naru.to is an apt comparison for her as a guy who has read a bit of#b.oruto. like god. i hate it here bc atb is soooo so good minus this. and this is there. and it sucks.
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it is always a little funny to me when people try to make psychologists and psychiatrists out to be the only people ever capable of being able to accurately diagnose mental illnesses and disorders and that their word is law as a way to criticize self diagnosis when like. once i was hospitalized and the psychiatrist there who i had not even known for more than a day tried to diagnose me as bipolar despite me having No history of mania because he.. couldn't really understand why i acted the way i did i guess???
#milgran't#tw hospital#tw psych ward#i just randomly remembered this (i say randomly as if i dont know exactly why im thinking about this stuff). dont mind me#tbh i should make a tag for like. more personal posts. but. idk what to make the tag name..#oh well#apologies for not being cool and collected and expressing things that show that im a human with emotions and needs recently#The Holidays are probably. one of the worst times of the year for me </3#its not even seasonal depression or whatever its just Oh Jesus Oh Fuck Oh God (gets hit by 99999 trauma bullets)#that psychiatrist sucked SOOOO fucking bad btw#trying to prematurely diagnose me as bipolar was one of the tamest things he did during my stay#i hate him i genuinely hope he dies <3#tbh i think he actually did. Break The Law with me. he probably couldve argued it was for the safety of others bc im crazy :3. but.#sometimes i just Remember That and im like. huh. hey what the fuck actually#but seriously. so many mental health professionals just make you sit there and go. .. how the FUCK did you get your license??????#ive heard some of The Most ''oh only people who are completely ignorant about mental health say this!'' type of shit from professionals#idk why im the one being labelled as insane when they think saying some of that shit is okay and professional MFKDLSFMDSf
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sometimes i think about the type of media i was into from 2017 to like mid 2020 & i genuinely want to throw up
#& it’s not even like ‘noooo cringe past me’ type shit#bc i also found out about gunnm at the time which is still one of the main universes i go to#also i still love stuff that i loved when i was like 9 (aka. hunchback of notre dame) so yea#but jesus christ what the fuck was i on otherwise#at least i had the mental capacity to stop watching game of thrones 2 episodes into season 8#like wow congratulations u realized that hate watching stuff is a complete waste of time!! cool!!!#but ig sorry 2 scott pilgrim & half of the dc universe i can’t fuckin stand this shit at this point#((partially sparing teen titans here bc they actually had some good concepts in the show))#& alien was actually always the best movie in the series & if u say ‘WELL ACTUALLY ALIENS IS OBJECTIVELY BETTER🤓’#ok????? go & suck james cameron’s dick some more or sth fuck off!????#((like most 80s action movies r so cringe to me like shut the fuck up predator is genuinely ass & there’s not a single enjoyable moment))#+ marvel was always mid & i don’t understand how i manipulated my brain into liking any of the shit they made#also not even gonna talk about music here oh my god dude
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people begging me to do something to make a certain someone happy aren’t taking into account that i hate this person and i will revel in the knowledge that i kept them from getting the most perfect version of what they wanted. in fact i hope they mourn the loss of this for the rest of their life and die unhappy about it
#i wish i could do worse. i wish i could go through and ruin everything i ended up giving them (all against my wishes) and i wish#i could ruin everything they love because god do i hate them and i will laugh when they finally fucking die#i have no idea why everyone glosses over all the shit this person has done to us and all the pain they’ve caused and i can’t fathom why#everyone wants to make them happy and why they’re willing to beg and bribe for me (and one other person who also hates them) to#give in but it is amusing and i hope they all fucking cry about it like oh nooo did poor [REDACTED] not get something they will never#get another chance to have ? oh well that sucks so bad for them i’m oh so sorry i caused that i can’t believe i managed to ruin their#chances for this how awful that this person i hate who has done and gotten away with so many horrible things didn’t get their perfect#little fantasy how sad we should all comfort them and call me a bitch who has no respect for anyone#god sometimes i wish i gave into violence more in the past bc i wish i got to fucking beat their ass up back when it would be self-defense#unforch i will never get to now. SAD!#i suppose i have murder fantasies and the thought of being able to ruin their funeral to soothe my soul#and the knowledge that i could make them fucking hurt by refusing to cooperate w them#and ough every time an opportunity presents itself for me to fucking take back what they took from me arises i have to fight myself#on it bc everyone will know it was me. i don’t even want what they have i just want them to know they will never get it back and#god it would upset them so much but they never should have had it in the first place ough if i get the chance before i ditch everyone here#for good i’d want to take it and stick around just long enough to hear how much they’ll cry about it before i fuck off#unforch i would need to know where all of their copies of things are but fuck i hate knowing they’ve taken so much from me bc i didn’t#get a fucking choice and they think they have to right to keep it all bc oh it makes them so happy they love having it they’re so fucking#afraid of losing it but it’d be so easy and i doubt they’d even notice for a while and i genuinely could disguise it as a mistake something#got misplaced some files corrupted etc etc but whatever this is fantasy a sweet little daydream of mine my second fantasy involving#them has smth to do with setting their house on fire and my third fantasy is desecrating their grave when the time comes#okay i’m done w this lalalalalala *skips off into the distance* i think revenge is not productive but god is it delicious to think about
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brrrrr (/pos)
#weight talk#<- just in case even though this is pos#but like. okay ive been. SEVERELY underweight all my life#like i looked like a skeleton you could see all my bones it was AWFUL#i just. I've literally always hated looking like that i hated looking like a walking corpse i mean i looked ILL#but recently i started taking remeron for anxiety#partially bc my anxiety keeps causing me to not eat properly bc i feel sick constantly#so i kept ending up in the ER for malnutrition and dehydration and my liver getting messed up#well i started the remeron for the panic attacks bc daily panic attacks suck but the psych mentioned it could increase appetite#and it???? did????? I'm eating on a slightly more regular schedule???? I'm eating more than once a day????#and like. ok I've always weighed like 100lbs#highest i ever got was 111 when i was 16#and then it dropped 10#and then dropped 10 more in the span of 3 months while i was in and out of ER#and i was genuinely starting to panic over it bc i could PHYSICALLY FEEL my muscles getting eaten bc i had no fat left#like i was getting drastically weaker by the day my knees still won't stop buckling#but in the about three months I've been taking those meds I've. gained 10 back#I'm actually gaining weight like me and my mother are genuinely SHOCKED this genuinely hasn't happened since i was fucking TWELVE#and just now i took off my shirt and noticed. holy shit. my stomach doesn't go CONCAVE when I'm hungry anymore#like whenever i couldn't tell if i was hungry before i would just look at my stomach and be able to tell if it was too curved inwards#but now!!!!!!! it doesn't do that!!!!!!! and I'm genuinely fucking ecstatic like oh my god i don't look dead anymore#I've always wanted to gain weight i feel like i would be 100% more comfortable in my body as a fat trans man#and i can't talk about that to anyone bc they always say it's either self harm or fetishistic#when no i just genuinely feel more comfortable in my skin thinking of myself that way#and now i have confirmation that i would genuinely be happier that way with this bc the sheer joy i have at not being underweight anymore#i mean I'm still a bit under but at least im gaining SOMETHING like at least i dont look like a drowned street cat#seeing the very slight rolls and folds in my stomach when i move the right way makes me happy
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realizing now that ask was likely in reference to one of the two posts. dont really care. system discourse is stupid. "dni if your view of personality doesnt line up exactly with mine" for people that generally seem so fucking ready to denounce pathologizing... okay yeah. the dsm knows everything, famously and without issue, and the western view of everything is perfect and its for sure your business to know whether or not someones childhood could be deemed traumatic.
#bloodletting#i am particularly... i dont give a shit. could not care less how many mutuals are lost.#genuinely what does it fucking matter...?#and before someone says that its their right to not want to interact. sure is.#its my right to think its fucking stupid as hell though.#this is... much more to the point than i imagine most of the other facets would be. oh well.#going to sleep so it is not my problem right now.#this is not directed at the asker. probably. unless you suck.
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my flatmate asking me the day before "do u want to hang out w me and [old friend] everyone else cancelled so I can invite u now" is not the heartfelt offer she thinks it is :^/
#what am i sloppy seconds. fuck off man#i like them both but im not in the place to socialise rn + also it just feels kinda mean. theyve had these plans for weeks#and i wasnt invited bc some of their other friends (who ive never met) didnt want me there which is fair enough ig#even tho their friends complained abt someone else bringing her bf but they both blocked the veto for that. pretty sure ik them-#better than some guy but whatever. i dont rly like their friends anyway bc they only ever have bad things to say abt them#like damn they sound like they have the emotional range of toddlers plus theyre all into shit like genshin. so i wasnt fazed abt it#hope they have a nice time etc but wow sure now theyve cancelled the day before u can invite me as a replacement. yeah thatll do wonders#for the social and self esteem issues i have around being single use and disposable and always on the outside etc yippee#the thing is if i go theyll just talk to each other anyway and leave me to be the fly on the wall like they always do. they dont want#me there they just want an audience i literally have nothing else to contribute i dont think they even like me that much so!#anyway complaint over. genuinely i hope they have a nice time im just annoyed at being treated like that + probably projecting a bit too#its not like i could go if i wanted to anyway bc i have shit to sort out + mail to wait for. maybe next time invite me from the start huh#we had another old friend visit last weekend but those plans were really made without me too and i was just added bc i Live Here so its#kind of unavoidable. but oh well whatever it was nice to see them either way#im too depressed rn to fix my social life or even rely on existing coping strategies in social situations so im having to temporarily#cut it back bc i get too trigger sensitive + dont want to hurt myself or others bc of an arbitrary emotional overreaction#its usually one of the first things to go when im Going Thru It not in a self isolating way but more bc its one of the hardest things#for me to maintain + im pretty self sufficient so its not absolutely crucial. like of course i love my friends but socialising is a#want not a need yknow. eating/sleeping/exercising/hygiene are all more fundamental parts of the engine so i gotta prioritise them#and it sucks but ill survive. anyway sorry for venting on everyones dash so early in the morning i woke up grumpy 👎#i need to get breakfast and then go out. ughhhhhhh okay.#.vent
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Who up spending all day not drinking liquids and then wondering why they have a head ache and feel like a husk?
#sucktacular sucks#it me the ps5#i had a cup of ice tea. a tiny bottle of apple juice. and some sips of water...#but i also scrubbed the fuck out of our whole bathroom and the entire stair case#and it was hot and humid as shit today#and i had to shower a second time today cuz i Genuinely Had To Clean the stairs for saftey and biohazard reasons#that are unrelated to me and not done by me and its a whole thing i wont share here but#ANYWAY I was scrubbing the fuck out of this house today sweaty and sticky and yucky and disgusting#and yet#i neglect...#to simply hydrate my own ass#sitting here writing this instead of doing anything about it 👍#(ill go get some water i guess finneeee)#also i fucking - okay this is funny#i was at my partners (3 hrs away + not in canada) and we were about to leave to go back to my place#and i said OH WAIT I FORGOT MY WATER BOTTLE and go back in the house and grab my bottle and we go#we get to my house and i look at my partner and i say.... i forgot my actual water bottle.... and theyre like HOW!!!#well see i was preoccupied getting the gatorade bottle id been using to hold my water with for the past few days#and neglected to collect my actual contigo water bottle out of the dish rack cuz i had just deep cleaned it....#so anyway im boo boo the fool and now i gotta gatorade bottle my water cuz i left my stupid fucking ACTUAL bottle behind#😭😭😭#ill get it back eventually but damn we wont be havin easy sippins for a moment#end stories :)
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me clocking in for my shift seeing a score chart of how many credit cards every cashier has gotten since the cards rolled out: i hate it here i actively cant take this for much longer i need to quit soon i need a new job by summer time i need to get out of here im out of here
manager: hey brot today you’re going to be making a little. diorama. for easter. i figured you’d enjoy it so i saved it for you to do :)
me: maybe michaels isnt so bad :)
#they rope you IN with the free being-paid-to-do-arts-and-crafts#but then BOOM credit cards BOOM rewards signups BOOM stupid warranty things BOOM severe hour cuts#well the . mad part about me is wondering if my hours have gotten cut so bad because my credit card thing is slacking#but like if someone says no to a credit card wrf else do you want me to do!!#especially bc im barely on register and i barely have hours like if im on register for 2 hours a week of course i have no opportunity to get#my numbers up#but then again its not like i want to be on register#but its still like youre punishing me wheni dont even have the opportunity to improve#and it sucks because im genuinely trained on literally everything in this damn store except custom framing ans ofc manager duties#register is my weak point but i can do literally anything else and i do it damn well#and im . at this point the third most senior non-manager employee#youre gonna do me dirty like this .#but then the other part of me is like well maybe its not them singling me out maybe its just yknow really bad hour cuts and my availability#but its like SHAKES MY CAGE#overall everything about this shit has gotten unpleasant if something doesnt change for the better in the next few months im outta here#but then im like oh but im gonna miss the 30% discount. the getting paid to paint random shit for 2 hours. all that :(#and its like eeurhhjgh#brot posts
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very important question. what various decepticon teams could use one (1) frontliner speedster
eta: i need at minimum four of them for this to work lmfao
#may or may not have evil plans for drag strip today#i just cant figure out which team leaders would have plausible uses for him#im sure almost any decepticon team lead could be like 'well everyone says your boss rapes you. i wanna see what all the fuss is about'#'hey actually hang on a second this is kind of fun. you did a good job'#and then accidentally gives drag strip like. just enough positive feedback that when he gets put back on his regular team#and back with motormaster who is like 'hes so egotistical. never say anything nice to him ever or he'll be even more insufferable'#hes just like shit. i need to go back to this other team. i liked them better. hello mr ex boss pweasies fuck me im miserable now'#and then the entire team can be like 'wait a second. what the fuck did you do to OUR fucktoy. we treat him better hes ours now. asshole"#extremely important to the genesis of this idea is that under no circumstances did drag strip want to have sex with any of them at first#but he's so absolutely twisted out of shape by motormaster's whole nonsense that hes just like 'oh ok so THIS rape was BETTER than that one#and i liked it more. so now that i feel genuinely miserable as opposed to like confused and only half miserable i think i need them again'#his life fucking sucks#red rambles#lemon#literally just for the tags
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i would like to express three blanket statements for everyone in the notes:
- yes i obviously know that calling people ‘family’ is a way of referring the other queer people. this is evident in the fact that i used that fucking word in the post jesus christ guys you don’t need to try and inform me of this
- related, but this was a rhetorical post. i do not need advice on how to talk to people. i am involved with real life trans groups and am well versed in how to subtly talk to people. i literally made this post while on break from my bad customer service job after seeing multiple trans customers
- maybe this is a me problem but people having dysphoria from being seen as trans is sad to me. like i sorta get it but also hm maybe work on ur self hatred idk. being trans is a joy
reading comprehension questions:
consider the targeted demographic of this post. then consider, do you dislike this demographic? if so, please try changing your opinion or at least scroll away and stop bothering me about it
did the author make reference to old forms of queer communication? if so, it seems like he is familiar with the concept and perhaps refrain from informing the author about it
why might have the author, at first glance, described dysphoria as self hatred? did he really do this, or does he rather acknowledge that one facet of dysphoria stems from depression and deprecation? consider why someone might not want to be seen as trans. is it for safety reasons, or because they have yet to unlearn the perceived shame of being trans, or any other multitude of reasons? any reason is perfectly valid but one may wish to examine their opinions on the cis view of the trans body
seeing trans ppl in public is literally life giving. wish there was a normal way to express to other trans people in public that we’re family and that i love them
#the second one is perhaps a hot take but idc my activity is annoying as fuck rn#*third one. whatever sorry#other posts have said this much more eloquently but obviously yes dysphoria is real and sucks etc#and you cant just make it go away by thinking positive thoughts or whatever else like yeah sometimes you do need hrt or srs or the like#that said. a lot of dysphoria for me and also a lot of other ppl ive seen CAN be eased when you stop hating yourself#like. surround yourself with trans ppl in many stages of transition. explore other mindsets (ie no medical transition etc)#even if they don’t apply to you because that person’s experience is no less valid etc#take a note from body neutrality/positivity people#stop giving a shit what cis people think#there are so many things that genuinely ease suffering and it wont work for everyone but wallowing is never the way to go sorry#like i have nothing against you people and i wish you all well. BUT. i am worried for you#because.. when you get hrt or any surgery…. it wont magically fix your depression you also have to do the work yourself#YOU have to unlearn the cis normative view about how bodies look#well idk. some people as with any marginalized identity go oh! im trans! therefore i cant be transphobic#without unpacking any of the transphobic bullshit that is ingrained in society and themselves#NOT saying that people with bad dysphoria are transphobic of course not. i dont think most of the people in the notes are at all#it is however a related concept okay. no bad faith interpretations of this reblog allowed#SOMEONE had to sit here and read everyones tags and replies and after 22k notes hes a bit ticked off#sorry 4 being a spiteful transsexual fagdyke idgaf#trans
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Fuck minerals and fuck microscopes
I hate that so much 🥰🥰🥰
#I have spend the last few months absolutely loathing this course#And now it's time for the exam#I feel unprepared as shit#It's like my ability to pass the practical part is based on a coin flip#Maybe#Maybe not#Who knows#Not me#And don't even get me started on the theory part#I don't know what kind of questions there'll be#Expect for one#And I suck at that#Oh well#I genuinely feel so anxious rn#At least it's the forst thing tomorrow#And then it's hopefully over#And completely done#And then on thrusday everything will be better#I hope#By the way I do actually love minerals#They're usually great#I just don't know which ones which#Even after 2 years
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