#its genuinely crazy how cute i look now and. how happy i am

[redphrite]

HEY EVERYONE TODAY IS MY HRT ANNIVERSARY TIME TO CELEBRATE ONE WHOLE YEAR OF GIRL JUICE

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 171 spoilers and thoughts but i'm mostly just going "YAY I LIKED THIS MOMENT" and more below the cut

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DEMON KING LLOYD HELLO. HELLO?? WHAT. WHY?? BUT WOW. HOLY SHIT. I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS

I LOVE WHEN CHARACTERS GAIN WINGS AND HORNS AND . GHGHHGHGHHG AAAHHH ITS MY FAVORITE THING if you didn't already know dragon lloyd was like one of my favorite all-time panels so this is VERY AWESOME FOR ME YAYYY YAAAAYYY HAHAHA

LIKE SERIOUSLY LOOK HE GOT FANGS N SHIT AND. OH MY GODD THE SMOKE SLIPPING PAST HIS LIPS IM SO??? THAT'S SO COOL. I LOVE WHEN THEY DO THAT WITH SMOKE AND MONSTROUS FORMS OF CHARACTERS

genuinely i need to draw this asap. pacing issues aside i am obsessed with how sick this is. i love this a LOT

ok ok back to the top bc theres some stuff i wanna touch on from before demon king lloyd got revealed! because...

"master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us".

EXCUSE ME WHAT

YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT OFF SCREEN, LLOYD TOOK TIME OUT OF HIS BUSY ASS DAY. TO TEACH THE KIDS HOW TO PLAY SOCCER. AND THEY HAVE PLAYED ENOUGH TO BE FAMILIAR ENOUGH TO PLAY ON THEIR OWN. WHICH MEANS THAT LLOYD . PLAYED SOCCER WITH THEM . AND WE FIND THIS OUT. NOW?? I. GGHH. THATS SO. CUTE. IM GOING TO BITE HIM. THE FUCKER. WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

the fact that they go up to ask him im going to EXPLODE?!?!?

he looks so nonchalant abt it here im cryinf

AND LOOK AT THEM GO THIS IS SO SO SWEET IM VERY GLAD LYRA GOT TO PLAY WITH THEM I LIKE THIS A LOT

this scene, and the beginning scene where the adults were just so casual with her and treating her as a living person with feelings and someone that they can talk to was so so heartwarming i oooghhh my heart

AND THEN THERE HE IS. SMILING IN THE BACK. YOU ASS.

I SEE YOU BEING KIND AND EMPATHETIC AND SELFLESS LLOYD. YOU LOST THE NONCHALANT WAR. YOU CAN'T ESCAPE

christ. i fucking HATE him /j /aff

it is also VERY silly that they're so casual abt. destruction like that HELPPP they got it from someone sob sob, though i imagine since most of the estate consists of people who have done construction it probably isnt that big of a deal when things get destroyed every now n then

and lyra looks so damn happy,,, god im so glad she had a good experience, she really needed one :')

also i completely LOST it when the kid got mad at lyra for not responding with a yes or no HELPPP JESUS CHRIST

again they,,, got it from someone HAHA though honestly i think it tracks. kids can be straightforwardly brutal in their language, especially when they don't really have biases or cares for who they are speaking to. as crazy as this instance looks (LMFAO) i think this fits well with the context of the straightforwardness of children and considering the person who they look up to at the estate. i think it was good for lyra to meet a human child her age who can speak straightforwardly and not skirt past things, if that makes sense? i hope it does!

AND THE DEMON KING TRANSFORMATION i already talked abt it above but i wanna point out this blue system box here

a power outside of the system?!?? what does this mean for the protagonist of the new prequel bk_moon is writing?? is the weather forecasting included in this???

my first assumption right now is that the demon king power is just an in-world power system while everything else (ie the weather forecasting) is external, blue-textbox system. maybe? so lloyd got the demon king power which comes with skills separate from the ones that the system can provide? that would explain why there's no indication of lloyd trying to use the weather forecasting, he probably can't use it,,,? except i dont know why artanis can use it in that case. most likely i am overthinking it LMFAO

semi-related, i am a little confused as to why artanis did this? i guess she really, really trusted him w this power? or maybe her weather forecasting noted that this would be something good to do i have no idea,,, it Does feel a bit sudden i won't lie, i'm not sure how earned this is

also javier and everyone else not reacting that much to the demon king status. SENT ME HAHA "... nothing's changed." LOL

deadpan humor never fails to make me giggle ily javier

also loved the moment where the two of them were bein serious for a sec,,, they've got a job to do they've got people to protect. lloyd will stop fate and javier will be right besides him...

i think showing them at emily's wedding really cements how much they really, REALLY need to fight fate now. the novel events happening is very very bad, but it feels like now that so many people, emily especially, have found THIS much happiness in their lives,,, failing to stop fate will hit even harder. i really like the analogy of a taut bow that the dragon king used when he first described it, bc it's really REALLY showing how much the repercussions will hit if they fail. im praying they succeed,,, please,,, i need a happy ending or i will curl up and turn into an actual shrimp irl.

and now the demons have to build the pantara railroad,,, artanis's expression omfg

she really didn't,,, know,,, she trusted him that much,,,, girl,,,

but it's ok. it'll be a net positive trust! that's how lloyd does things!!! and then soon we'll get the happy ending where we can get the eye of summer and beat up fate and then silly fun times YAYY <- probably copium

some other thoughts of note that i had with a dear mutual (hi sprout :3) about this ep:

we were talking about how the plot seems to be paced right now, and honestly i'm of the opinion that while yes its Technically moving, the way they're ending each ep in this current arc makes it feel like it's going both very slow and very fast, that is to say it feels like it's not moving at all

bc they're like "okay NOW we're gonna do the build project" and it's been like that for several episodes now. pieces are moving but we're going past the point of it all too fast (especially the whole demon king thing. mentioned this before but while cool, doesn't feel as earned simply bc we're both tackling each point and yet blowing past all the points, so it's a lot less satisfying than it should be (despite how awesome it is,,, oh lloyd you give me so much internal conflict </3))

it does make me a lil worried that they're gonna timeskip the hell out of the pantara railroad build. however this episode, although it still has a weird pacing/movement issue, does feel a little bit better than the last two imo, so i have hope that it'll turn out okay, that it'll start heading up! i'm actually really excited to see where they go with this and i'm sure that even if the pacing is still goofy i'll have some kind of fun with it (seriously the panels this ep were wonderful HAHA)

anyway that's all for this week! extremely excited for the next ep,,, ill see yall then,,, lets go pantara railroad arc!!!

[d6volution]

Himbo kinger with a huge dick, fucks fem reader , and usage of pet names, and praise. Just pure filth.. in his pillow fort.

sorry this is so short, I'm still trying to get in the groove of writing kinger but i hope you enjoy anyways!

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"Ah.. you also have a pillow fort in your room.. I don't know why I'm surprised." You said, followed by a genuine chuckle. It was oddly charming. "Well your highness, may I go inside?"

Kinger twiddled with his fingers, his heart always raced when you used those cute honorifics with him, "Yes.. o-of course!" The words fumbled out of his mouth and he watched you get on your knees and crawl towards the entrance.

His eyes immediately lands on your ass as you wiggle and shimmy into his pillow fort, clearly with great precaution and care to not have it topple over. He wasn't sure if it was your ass or the fact that you cared so much not to destroy his fort that could be the reason he was pitching a tent right now. "O.. Oh my.." He looked down, then back up at you. Surely you wouldn't mind right..?

You were trying to wiggle your way inside his pillow fort when you felt two gloved hands on your hips. The sudden contact caused you to stiffen, but only briefly. The dots quickly connected in your head. You smirked.. What a pervy king he was. His hands caressed and gently squeezed at your form in pure awe. Kinger felt his dick throbbing beneath his robes, he knew this alone was enough to get him off if he kept it up. He cleared his throat, he had to stop himself if he wanted to go all the way with you.  "Apologies, y/n." He made sure to speak loud enough so you could hear him.

You finally slipped completely inside, "Hmn.. don't worry about it, that's what we're here for.. right? Come inside. There's more where that came from.. sir." You added the honorific just to tease him, and it certainly worked.

Kinger unceremoniously shoved himself inside the beloved fort and you two were pressed up against one another, his dick rubbed against your thigh. "Ah.. is that your hand or are you just happy to see me?"

"Well I am certainly happy to see you, y/n. As for that w-well, yes you make him very happy too." He said with genuine sincerity, and it made you giggle at how straight forward he was. Your hand slid down to the bulge beneath his robes, you began to stroke it through the fabric. "Well, lets make him happier hmm?" You hummed, and you could feel him twitching in your grasp. You didn't realize until you were feeling him up just how big he was.. you wondered if he was even aware.

"What soft.. hands you have.." He said breathlessly and thrusted into your palm. He was shaking a little from how excited he was , it's been.. he can't even remember how long since he was touched like this by someone other than himself.

You pushed aside his robes and his shaft flung out happily, it was thick and girthy. Making your legs press together at the thought of it nudging its way into your tight entrance. You needed him. Now. You wiggled out of your bottoms, and if it wasn't for the poorly lit pillow fort kinger would have been staring hard, but he seemed to be in his own world while you prepared and positioned yourself accordingly. "Kinger.. c'mere.."

"Oh! y/n... almost forgot you were there," He said with a chuckle, and followed your lead. Crawling in between your legs, his warm dick rubbed against your thigh. "Oh.." He thrusted against your thigh, his hands holding your waist. Making you feel quite small beneath him, "K.. Kinger.." You shuddered, his grip was tight on your waist. His eyes weren't focused on one particular part of your body as he got off on your thigh. You had to stop him before he blew his load without even being inside you.

"K.. Kinger wait.. ah.. lets.." You reached down and guided his shaft towards your entrance. You swallowed, the tip was thick and fat.. it made you hesitate a little.

He could feel the heat radiating from your entrance. It was driving him crazy, "G.. Good.. yes, good girl.." He thanks you and his hips jumped forward, the tip pressing against your entrance with a bit of force. "I was getting quite distracted there.. thank you, princess." He chuckles as he carelessly attempts to mount you.

The pet name he let slip from his mouth caused your stomach to go in knots. "M.. Mn.." His tip was finally breaching your hole, spreading you apart nicely along his dick. You gasped and gripped at his robes now , no longer needing to guide him. "You're so.. tight.." He mutters , but forces another inch inside. You don't think he's aware of how he's almost man handling you.

"Ghn.. n-no you're just bIG..!" Your voice hitched as he thrusted hard and he was buried about halfway inside of you now. "Fuck.." How was this only HALF of him? What kind of monster dick did he have? You questioned in your head, chest heaving. Your insides twitched around him eagerly. He was filling you so nicely..

"Ah, language young lady." He said, interrupting your thoughts. "N.. Now.." He seemed to adjust himself before continuing his assault on your entrance, bullying the rest of his dick inside of you as you squirmed and whined beneath him. He finally bottomed out and if he had a mouth he'd be smiling. "Are you okay..? You look.. crazy. Like me." He commented without thinking, staring at your dazed expression.

"Y.. Yeah.. just fine.." You said and moved your hips a little, his dick was so tightly snug inside of you it felt like you couldn't breathe. "M.. Move , please move Kinger.." You said and tugged him closer.

"Ah, right.. I shouldn't keep a princess waiting.. ha.." He said and started to move, dragging his dick out of you then slamming back in. He didn't mean to be so rough, truly.. but the way you were clamping down onto him made it impossible not to, "You feel.. feel.. so nice, y/n." He said and pumped into you at a uneven rhythm, but it didn't matter. He was so big that he was hitting every senstive corner that had you moaning and whimpering his name.

"K.. Kinger.. ha..!" You locked your legs around his slim form and he made a surprised noise, but this only encouraged him to thrust faster. With your bodies colliding and moving more than usual the pillow fort began to fall apart. But for once Kinger didn't care, he was chasing his high. "Close.. I'm.. y/n..." You were too, but hardly in a sound enough state to vocalize it. Your insides clamped down on him and you felt your body buzz as you reached your climax. He fumbled over his words as his hips stuttered and he was damn near bruising your skin by how tightly he held you while he came, your insides suddenly felt warm.

You both were still for a moment, coming down from your high and trying to catch your breath.

"Ah.. the pillow fort.." You said breathlessly, just now noticing how out in the open you two were.

"Oh, ..oh— I didn't even notice. Would you like to rebuild it with me..? After we.. clean up, o-of course." He said, a bit nervously.

"I would love to, Kinger."

[commander-gloryforge]

okay after playing for a healthy and normal 10 hours finishing act one, here are my thoughts.

QQWWWWWWWWWWAAAAARRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH YYEAAAAAASSASS S WWEWEWEEWWWW AYYYWEEEAEEDEDDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSA WOOOOOOOOOOOOIHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

okay . god. okAY. fuck. okay. so. i dont even know where to start im enjoying myself so much here its crazy. like im having such a good time genuinely holy shit.

THE MUSIC. fucuukkkkk god the music. okay it has a lot of that one instrument that i cant name but its a very specific sound that they used a lot in ibs too and i genuinely love that sound. god. FUCK. the music is so good. i think i already have a fave track but im not gonna name it just yet bUT FUCK ITS SO GOOD. i think im gonna have to get that one on vinyl when they release it. GOD.

also voice acting? HELLO???? insane job done by the kodan ESPECIALLY poised arrow, he's AMAZING. and the uh. The Big Bad Guy we fight at the end of chapter 5. uhm. hello. the voice. hello sir. hey. hiiiiii.

the map. ive only seen the first so far but by god this is my favoruite place ever in the world. i really love how peaceful that place is, but how alive it feels. theres events everywhere, the hearts are wonderfully done, it LOOKS just simply beautiful. its so much fun to explore and run around in and just do nothing but sit there and listen to the kodan talk. this is genuinely the best of. all worlds? like its HUGE but never feels empty, its fun to explore but easy to get through, its diverse and beautiful and alive, it feels like a core map but BETTER. the adventures are fun, I GOT TURNED INTO A FISH, the events are lovely, i want to eat this map.

warclaw??? actually feels good to use????? genuinely love how it feels now, actually kind of prefer it over raptor/jackal. i only have the first mastery on it because im focusing on homestead mastery but omg the jumping abilities are so fun and i cant wait to level the mastery more... the skin you get is so cute and i might genuinely use warclaw so much more now. its abilities are actually kinda fun to use too

SPEAR. i didnt get to test spears out a lot but i can confidently say that I LOVE GUARDIAN SPEAR i switched auroras build and now story fights are actually fun. have not tested it with any other class but its GOOD.

characters. i cant say so much about the story itself yet but it does feel so much better than soto just because of the characters alone. instead of being thrown into some brand new mess with a bunch of characters we dont know that quickly become irrelevant, we actually have known faces by our side- like properly. caithe and malice are are GREAT companions for this, i love the tyrian alliance (despite being a jennah hater) because we keep coming back to these characters we've known, it doesnt feel like all the relationships weve made have been cast aside anymore. HELL WE EVEN GET CHARACTERS THAT WERE MISSING SINCE IBS BACK! even if its just for a short time, THEYRE THERE, WE GET TO CHECK IN WITH THEM! THATS GREAT! and even with all the new characters, they dont feel as overwhelming, they just feel.. good? its just good. its just right.

and theres so much more to say but its 5:30am right now and i need to wrap this up.

god. okay its easy to please me. take everything i say with a grain of salt. i am very easily impressed and excited, ESPECIALLY when it comes to gw2, but it really does feel like theyre figuring it out. it feels like anet really did listen to us, and learned from soto, and things are going well. im so happy. i love this so much. AAAAAAAH

[toomuchracket]

okay but I would love your thoughts on what the boys reactions are when flatmate! matty and you finally get together!!

like obviously they wouldn't be shocked, I imagine they even had a bet on but I would love if just one of them was genuinely flabbergasted. in my mind it's ross bc he just seems oblivious and takes mattys incessant "we're just close mates!!!" seriously bc him and matty are just close mates so why wouldn't you be?

I imagine you invite them all over and matty makes them sit down and you go make tea and coffee for everyone. you bring it in and sit next to matty and go "okay so we have some news-" and matty is just so fucking excited he interrupts you and just goes "WE'RE DATING SHES MY GIRLFRIEND AND WE'RE IN LOVE" and you're like "babe!!! woah!!! give the men a second to breath!! (but i love you too that was very sweet)" The immediate reaction is a groan from George, a smile from Adam and a completely shocked face from Ross. at first matty is like "George??? that's the worst reaction ever?? you're meant to be my best mate and-" George just cuts him off and goes "matty I am really happy for you but couldn't you have got together literally a week later? now I adam £20." this causes him and Adam to burst out laughing whilst you and matty just sit there shocked (Ross is also shocked but that's because he still hasn't processed that you're together lol)

Ross eventually says "...but you always said you were just mates???" and Adam is like "Ross love, seriously did you see them in bed together cuddling? or how about when they dance in the kitchen together when they make breakfast and tea for eachother? or when matty hears her sniffle once and goes bat shit crazy and gets 200 tissues and loads of cough sweets? it was pretty fucking clear those two idiots were head over heels!" the whole time they've been looking at eachother during this convo so Ross looks over to you two for confirmation of this shocking turn of events and just sees you staring longingly into eachothers eyes and he's like "fucking hell have they always looked at eachother like that?" and adam and George just do a slow nod and Ross says "god I'm stupid"

aaaaaaaah this shit is SO CUTE. kind of obsessed with the idea that adam's the first to know/notice that you and matty are in love with each other actually - like because he's so easy to talk to and kind, both you and matty inadvertently end up just letting your guards down a bit and gushing about the other to adam. and he doesn't say anything to either of you about how the other feels, he just does a classic adam hann knowing look (you know the vibe) and waits to see how long it'll take one of you to admit it. and then adam and george are chatting in rehearsal one day and you and matty are being cute with each other in the corner (fuck knows where ross is... off somewhere being sexy as per usual probs), and george nudges adam and goes "look at the pair of them" and he tells adam about how domestic the two of you are at home and that he had said you were like a married couple. adam's like "they've both been pining for the other to me for years its insane. maybe now you've said something they'll realise and get together now. i bet it'll happen this weekend". george is like "hmmm no they're both too stubborn to admit it so soon. give it another week to sink in" and they literally put a bet on it lmao. but i don't even think it's like a planned reveal when they find out you and matty are together, i think the boys are just over at the flat chilling and you and matty kiss in front of them (like how you used to do head kisses, just a casual kiss on the lips as you pass each other) and the boys are like WHAT WAS THAT and matty's like "oh yeah we're a thing now turns out we've been in love with each other for a while lol. but now it's official" and then the exchange about the bet happens, like you said. ross really is in shock though - he's like "i've played wingman for both of you so many times??? you were in love with each other and living in the same flat and i was wingmanning you so you could take other people home???" and matty's like "yeah lol we both literally just realised on saturday night that it was requited love". and ross thinks for a minute and goes "wait i literally wingmanned you on saturday night WTF???" and you're like "yeah and then he came in to ask me for a condom and decided he wanted to shag me instead lol" and matty's like "babe please it was making love not shagging" and the boys are like "ok we're happy for you but please shut the fuck up now" lmao <3

[mars-ipan]

OK green day concert highlights bc it’s the next day now and i’m really happy i got to go still. these won’t be in chronological order bc i don’t think like that

billie joe did the freddy mercury call n response thing throughout the whole show and it was sick (i have always wanted to participate in that)

he also kept telling us he wanted to see us “jump around and go fucking crazy” and the entire time i was just thinking BILLIE MY KNEES. PLEASE

tre cool has a really good stage presence (i mean obviously . he’s a performer. but still) also he kept throwing his drumsticks throughout the Entire show he had. so many drumsticks

he was also incredible with his performance of all by myself. funny as fuck song (has an angsty kmhn animatic in its head about it)

before the show these green and pink paper hearts got handed out to us and we put them over our phone flashlights for wake me up when september ends and bobby sox. a lot of the show’s lighting and branding was green and pink too which felt special To Me as someone who. well. marzi is green and pink Das Me. so i’m letting myself take that as a sign that things are looking up bc i need that lmao

someone complimented my epic heart-shaped bag <3

when brain stew ended i pulled my phone out to record what i thought was gonna be the transition into jaded. what i ACTUALLY ended up recording was the transition into american idiot and it fucking ruled

during “know your enemy” billie joe brought an audience member from the pit up onstage and had them sing and it was really cute. shoutout to kierstan i loved watching you jump around onstage <3 oh-way-oh-way

in the middle of letterbomb billie joe paused the song and gave this huge speech about how tonight he wanted to see us all jumping together and dancing together and singing together for us and for each other and for our loved ones and those who are gone and that this wasn’t a party but a celebration and It Made Me Tear Up. letterbomb is one of my favorite songs in american idiot (love me an anthem) and the unity i felt with everyone there as the song resumed was incredible

just. scream-singing lyrics with the rest of the audience in general. extra big love to when the band would play at a slightly faster bpm than the song usually is so we would all sing a little faster too and it was so hype

for most of the show i was next to this blonde girl who clearly was just as passionate about the band as i am. and we never spoke and we didn’t know each other but singing and dancing alongside her was really really fun. my opinion of her was slightly lowered when she pulled out a vape but at least she always blew the cloud somewhere where people Weren’t

during bobby sox (which also made me tear up bc i am a faggot !) someone handed billie joe a pink ribbon bow and he put it in his hair and it was really sweet and queer and i’m so happy i got video of it

sidenote for being like. in their 50s. green day still look really good. billie joe especially. seeing him live made me realize it is not just gender envy i feel for that man he is genuinely just attractive. cannot help my weakness to guyliner and boys who look a little like girls </3 it’s ok tho i needed some middle aged man rep in my “people i find attractive” list. first realized it when he blew kisses to the crowd and my heart skipped i went “wuh oh” to myself

he’s Been doing this for this show but the line “not a part of your redneck agenda” in american idiot was modified to say “maga agenda” which was. satisfying

at some point during dookie this huge blimp-shaped balloon with a sad animal face on the front and the words “BAD YEAR” on its side was carried through the audience by staff and i got some cool videos of it. saw that thing and immediately thought “oh so real”

so many of these songs felt amazing but look ma no brains felt particularly electric to me for some reason

at the start of are we the waiting billie joe jumped down into the pit and i presume mingled with the audience for a bit. it was cool :)

i LOVEDD watching billie jump around and get into character during st. jimmy. he was cheeky and energetic and cute and it was fun

at some point during dookie billie joe was given a mexican flag and he held it up to the camera and wore it like a cape for a bit. viva la méxico

this is standard concert fare but hearing billie joe shout “AUSTIN !!!!” and “TEXAS !!!!” throughout the show and include the location in the lyrics felt really really good. loved cheering with the audience every time it happened

billie joe started singing the “nobody likes you” sequence in a falsetto to mimic the female voice in the recording and slowly faded out to let the audience hit the notes exactly as we sang it with him. it felt like we got to pitch in and help it was cool

for some reason abt halfway through american idiot (album) a solid amount of people in our little chunk of audience just . got up and left. it was really bizarre but also worked out pretty nice for me bc i was able to get better videos and when i had to take sit down breaks i could still actually see the show. which was REALLY nice for homecoming because that song is another of my favs from the album but i was getting Tired and couldn’t stand for the full thing

usually with live music you feel the bass in your head but for some reason i felt it in my chest (as did the friend i was with) especially sitting down. it was a little odd but also made you feel like the music was squeezing your heart which. on brand. i had the song in my veins

the last song billie joe played was time of your life bc. duh. obvious end-of-show choice and i’m sure that’s something they’ve been doing for years and years now. but i pulled my phone out to record it bc it was Sweet and clearly i wasn’t the only one bc billie literally got two lines in before pausing to make fun of all of us for pulling out our phones. we got scolded lmao. i recorded through him chastising us but put the phone away afterwards bc He Was Right. so now i have a recording of billie joe armstrong going “let’s see how many videos we can get on The Youtube” and giggling to himself :]. he laughed through the song too. also later on during the song tre came back onstage with his phone out and got way up in billie’s face with it and made him laugh again. it was very silly and sweet

god the set was so cool. it made me miss doing theatre it was so fucking cool. we had fire and fireworks and lights and fog and

after the show tre pulled out a giant trash can filled with drumsticks (this must have been where his infinite supply of drumsticks was coming from) and threw them into the pit for the audience members. when the trash can was empty he threw the can OVER his drum set and cleared it. i was so afraid he was gonna hit it but he did not

[betweenthings2]

THE NEW CHAPTER. i feel like an exclamation mark. ! . im going to DIE this is the sweetest thing ever ur a god im convinced like how do u just Casually write the most romantic thing ive ever read. i need you in libraries. death and destruction may occur but nothing will kill my love for this like i am in AWE it's just so SOFT

The days fall into a rhythm of morning coffee and cigarettes on the deck, easy midday walks through the sprawling countryside, stopping to look at sheep or cows or horses and pet the friendly ones, then afternoons spent making music just for the sake of making it or watching films or reading. In the evenings, George cooks and on occasion, Matty opens a bottle of wine. Sometimes, they pass a joint, or two, back and forth in the evening, and life settles into a routine Matty's never really had. It's nice, really nice, for a while, but before long Matty begins to feel like something is missing.

okay well *distant sobbing noises*. i cant even describe what i love so much about this but its just so!!! the countryside. the cooking. the spliff. STAWP

A week later, they find themselves on the way to meet the breeder Matty found. Matty is a ball of energy in the passenger seat, rambling about how excited he is that they're going to have a puppy and how this is their puppy, a puppy that's theirs, not Matty's or George's and how it's almost like they have a little family now, Matty, George, and the puppy they've decided to name Mayhem. George lets him, a fond smile on his face the whole time.

this is the cutest thing ive ever read and i am going to start crying now. MAYHEM MENTIONED its time for me to be Insufferable about this. me and mayhem are best friends, mayhem just doesnt know it yet. anyway. they have a puppy!!!!!!!!!!!!! im about to explode pls the way youve written mattys excitement and how hes like JSJDJJWOXOWKIWOEKJEOKQKDIIWKDJWI and george is just :) next to him. obsessed

They don't end up waiting long though, and it's not twenty minutes before they’re back on the road, an excitable little ball of black fur in Matty's lap, already making it clear he's going to live up to his name.

I NEED A MOMENT AND I NEED TISSUES. im about to start sobbing pls this is So Cute i cant deal with it

George hangs back for a moment, taking a couple of discrete photos on his phone before following Matty.

i need more moments and i need more tissues. HES TAKING PICTURES im gonna actually seriously start crying. i think its like an unwilling reaction now like i see the user betweenthings2 and i start to well up in preparation. pavlovian or whatever. im obsessed and im going to die

"No dogs on the bed."

me when i lie. that dog will be on the pillow by six pm

anyway i am Obsessed with this and i want it as a scroll and a book and tattooed onto bleached leather (is that even a thing) and embroidered into a tshirt and and and and EVERYTHING. i genuinely do not think u understand how amazing u are. u convey emotion SO well that it makes my heart hurt and i really really Really hope u know it!!! best writer on the planet <3

Thank you so much!!! =)

Me, in libraries?? That's so sweet of you to say, oh my god, I don't even know what to say 💚💚

They're so soft!! To be so honest, some of this is me being a little bit weirdly nostalgic about the early lockdowns because even though everything was absolutely awful, I had no responsibilities and I love having no responsibilities, at least for a little while. I did start to go a little bit crazy, but who didn't? Who hasn't gone a little bit crazy? Fictional!M+G had to get a dog so they didn't go crazy.

Fictional!George loves fictional!Matty so much!! They're getting a puppy and fictional!Matty's so excited and fictional!George is so happy that he's happy. Everyone's so in love!

Fictional!Matty and Mayhem have the same excitement levels about things right now.

Again, fictional!George is so in love and they're so happy! They both absolutely have collections of candid photos of each other taken since they were like fifteen.

I was going to give it about a week before Mayhem was on the bed, but you might be right. All fictional!Matty has to do is ask really nicely and he gets what he wants.

Things are going to get sad again, unfortunately for poor fictional!M+G. They might be happy one day. We'll see.

Anyway, thank you so much for the wonderful compliments--you are so kind!! =)

[arcplaysgames]

okay with THAT dissertation done, the rest of the shit I've done so far, which is finishing up a lot of SLinks! I have now completed Temperance, Sun, Moon, and Death. Let's go over them.

GET READY FOR SOME CARTOMANCY TAAAAAALK

who me? what? don't know WHAT you could be implying Kawakami hahaha anyway how about this weather, btw i'm super happy for you. wow what a crazy random happenstance! you deserve it, i love you.

I KNEW IT, SHE KNOWS

When asked how she figured out, she points out that the thing with Takase's guardians worked out way too well for her and Reverie was the only person she told. Which... yeah, that makes it p5retty fucking obvious huh.

lmao as if Reverie going "I need their names," in the previous scene wasn't a massive flag. I am not playing this subtle but also Kawakami is smart and I adore her.

Her SLink is complete!!!! So far, she's the best one in the game, to my utter astonishment. I'm glad I muscled through the awful start because this SLink has everything: mocking the player's teacher-maid fetish, an incredibly mouthy cool millennial lady, a genuinely tragic backstory without being soap opera-y, sympathetic portray of sex workers. IT'S GOT IT ALL.

Kawakami was kind of a very Standard portrayal of Temperance. It's not a super interesting card, it's just about having the emotional strength to find the path forward and to find balance in yourself spiritually and materially. It's often portrayed as an angel passing water between two cups-- cups are the suit of emotional intelligence. And they're my favorite suit, personally.

Kawakami starts the arc solidly in a reversed Temperance, she can't balance anything, the goblets are overturned, and all of her emotional strength is just pouring out onto the floor because she is so overworked, there is no well for her to draw from. Through the arc, she actually shares her troubles with Reverie, which in of itself is a show of emotional strength, and with his help manages to rebalance herself. Finally, she can take her eyes off the cups and look ahead to her future.

TEN OUT OF TEN, SO FAR SHE'S MY FAVORITE CONFIDANT.

I haven't been recapping it because it's.... genuinely not a link that's easy to summarize bc its a lot of politics and small moments, but I finished the Sun too!

OH SO THAT'S THE JOKE OF EVERY LINK HUH, EVERYONE KNOWS WHO REVERIE REALLY IS that's pretty cute actually, I like it.

Yoshida was this failed politician who got disgraced twenty years ago in a finance scandal, now returned to try and take office again. His whole arc is about his new ideals of empowering the youth and taking care of the elderly, and with the rise of the Thieves, he acknowledges them as a symptom of a broken system that needs massive reform.

You follow him through some intra-party political issues and his recurring thing is that he sticks to running instead of being someone else's right hand man, even when doing so would clear his name from the finance scandal that ruined him.

I'm NOT gonna lie, his final speech is good. He speaks about Reverie, "a certain young man" he met who is aspiring to change the whole, and though Yoshida cannot follow the same path as this young man, he hopes they will meet again at the top of the mountain they are both climbing together, separate.

It's really good honestly. And for the curious, Yoshida is a very interesting Sun to me. The Sun comes at the end of the Star-Moon-Sun sequence and those three cards are basically their own mini-journey. The Star is the herald that the story isn't over and you must continue. The Moon is the darkness that follows, full of illusions and distractions and madness you have to navigate. And the Sun is the light that comes after, is exuberant and joyful, and more than anything it is certain in itself. In the light of the Sun, all is revealed and laid bare. (Which is why it leads into Judgement soon after.)

Yoshida works for the Sun really well because the twenty years of scandal and shame have already happened to him, and he has made it out to the other side. Now, his ideals and purpose are illuminated under the Sun and he never strays from his path.

It's good! Eight out of ten on him!

DEATH! Goth Doctor!

lmao she figured it out too. I guess that's just the joke of every max rank, huh?

Anyway, I loved Tae for The Unnamed Arcana. She's great. I love that she's actually a goth, actually has a very morbid sense of humor, actually talks about death a lot. They really leaned into the whole vibe and I appreciate that.

Also her look is impeccable obviously.

Tae's whole thing is that she's undergoing the process of Death, the transformation the card deals with. With the lost of her prestigious position at the research hospital, she is stuck working in a small back-alley clinic.

She definitely goes through a period of real mourning for her past self, resisting the forward motion of her life. But slowly she begins caring for the locals around her and builds a new patient base. Really, the drama with her past patient and the miracle cure for her is an afterthought; the Death aspect is definitely rooted in Tae herself. And by the end of the link, she is still dour and morbid, but there is life to her voice again.

She's great. Seven out of ten.

So Mishima.

SIGHS. Okay. I hate Mishima as a character and I think he represents everything that is bad about the Phantom Thieves and it's his actions (which were completely unasked for and unprompted) that leads the plot to the clusterfuck we're about to enter with Okamura's imminent death. Fuck the phansite and fuck this phuckboy.

BESIDES THAT

yeah he's a half-decent Moon? It's complicated, actually.

So his set up as the Moon is pitch-perfect. The Moon card is a place a person comes to after great upheaval in their life. It's a dark, quiet place for contemplation and reflection. Best case scenario is that it's a stepping stone in your journey towards the new dawn and the Sun.

But there are strange images in the reflection and the reflected light of the Sun in the Moon can lead a person astray and into madness.

Again: the Moon is an environment of possible madness. The Hanged Man is a risk taken that might led to madness. The Hanged Man goes into the deal eyes open, knowing the stakes. The Moon doesn't know the danger around them and has to keep from lingering.

So as the Moon, Mishima goes from being Kamoshida's punching bag into this dark, quiet place where he doesn't know what to do with himself, only that he needs a purpose. He settles on the Phansite.

Now, I think the game is arguing that running the Phansite gives Mishima direction and purpose, letting him move forward in his path.

I think that's undercut by how much the game itself points out Mishima's actions led to various fuck ups. Remember when Reverie had to be the one to tell him to give back the fucking money he'd collected from "donations"? Honestly, most of the conversations in this SLink are just trying to drag Mishima away from his worse impulses.

Which... also kinda works! I say the game's intended portrayal of the Moon is dumb, but my own is just as valid. I don't think Mishima has moved on and grown at all. I think he's been dazzled by the false, reflected light of the Moon (metaphorically, the allure of his nebulous fame re: the Phansite and his repeated misunderstanding of how to use it without being a malicious prick) and instead of continuing on his journey, he is staring slack-jawed into the illusion.

Sooooooooooo.... Nine out of ten, honestly!

But also I hate Mishima.

ONWARDS, INTO IMMINENT DISASTER!

[alegator]

hiii everyone :D i miss tumblr so bad and the ability to make long form blog posts ugh twitter is not the same plus the site and app are literally so shit. even though the tumblr app is not much better sometimes!! ive decided i want to post more on here to continue my little virtual diary…. I love the tagging system and most of all, love being able to look back and read my own updates!!! it’s crazy how it can help me recall the exact feeling of that moment… it feels special :) Twitter is great for quick fleeting thoughts so i wanna make lengthy life posts on here as a little time capsule, so i can have fun looking back and reading all my posts 10 years from now (if this site still exists. but i joined in 2011 and its still here so who knows). plus ive been posting my entire life on here for YEARS so who cares i will be vulnerable and over share and shit!!!!!! as is tumblr tradition… fuck it if youre my cousin on my homestuck side you can have my SSN.

moving on, here are fun life updates:

- celebrated my 11th anniversary on Feb 14th with the love of my life, Tenma!!!! i have been affectionately calling it the 7/11 anniversary since it’s been 11 years together, but also 7 years married 🤯 it actually fucks me up so bad that 2017 was 7 years ago like. genuinely lol FUCKKK HOOWWW 2017 should’ve been like 3 years ago. we choose to get married on the same day Tenma asked me out, which is also Valentine’s Day, and it was the best decision of all time for SO many reasons. maybe i will make a fun big post detailing those thoughts that another time!! we spent our anniversary day trying out a new coffee spot (so cute and SO pink omg), taking photo booth pictures at a new spot, exploring cute shops, and having an insanely delicious set menu i think maybe 6 courses? at a very fancy restaurant. i think 3 years ago we tried a new restaurant on our anniversary w their set Valentine’s Day menu course and it was so good, fun, and the best way to try out new foods so we’ve kept it going and i LOVE IT!!!!! i am already excited to see what tenma picks out for next year lol. finished the night by watching In The Mood For Love at our favorite local movie theater and i LOVED the movie, the whole end until bedtime we were just talking about it and dissecting it together. i love our life!!!!!!!!!

-tenma and i went to disneyland at the end of February for our anniversary trip!! ive gone before but they haven’t. IT WAS SO FUCKING FUN i am not a Disney fan at all but i love disneyland idk it’s just fun as fuck… um my feet were fucked afterwards lol but so worth it. one day at disneyland and the next at California aventure i wanna go back already but most importantly, tenma was already talking about wanting to go back and that makes me so happy bc it means they really enjoyed it!!! yay!!!! they even went on rides they thought were really scary just so we could try them together just once and that filled my heart with joy. then we also got to meet my online friend and had hotpot together. DELICIOUS i want to go back and explore LA next time and see more friends!!!! we are maybe planning a trip to San Fran in a few months though as the consulate is there to get my passport so that will take priority over any other trips☝🏼

-I GOT MY GREENCARD YEAGHHRHRHFJF!!!!!!!! ok actually i got it last year lol i wasn’t sure if i should put that on here but actually im so happy so fuck it!!! and then we celebrated by having a fancy dinner and I shared the news w the waiter who said he also did the same process w his wife! and yes i cried when i got my greencard idc i am HAPPY! crazy bc i got DACA for the first time in 2013 and then in 2023 i got my greencard… it’s been a fucking rollercoaster. and tenmas been there literally every step of the way…. Tenma is my rock I love them so much im crying typing this bc of how much i love them and how much they always support me and augnfngnfmg

-concerts this year have been Sonic symphony, kikuo/bo en/gus, Hannah Diamond, and hatsune miku (mikuexpo 2024)!!!!!!!! i loved all of the concerts genuinely so fun and next month i am taking my youngest sibling to a concert of a guy I don’t know but they love him so we will go and have a blast 🫡 idk if I’ll buy more tickets to more concerts but even if I don’t, it’s been a really really good year concert wise and i got to experience so many fun shows i never thought i would see live before!!

-spent time with lovely friends and celebrated old friendships and new ones yaaaay i love my friends and im blessed to have a good support system and I can’t wait to see what new friends I make in the future….

-I have a cold rn and took nighttime meds and unfortunately they are starting to hit so it’s time to say goodnight to tumblr…

If you read this far ummm ok weirdo… lol just kidding but i will try and post my lil life updates and pics more often so that not all my posts are like. months worth of writing… or maybe I won’t and the next time I make a post will be in a year idk!!!! this site is full of so many memories both good and bad and it’s dear to my lil heart, even if the feel isn’t the same since everyone mass migrated to Twitter, I want to come back here more often and make new memories whenever I can. goodnight 💤

[cordelianewman]

Happy Birthday, Babe! @cagenewman

Even though my official birthday plans for you won't start until tomorrow, and continue throughout the weekend, can't pass up giving you your presents. While we celebrate another holiday, I stand firm this is why we need a whole birthday weekend or week for you, so it doesn't steal your thunder, obviously! First, I couldn't pass up a delicious chocolate malt and stout cake -- something tells me the Irish would approve. Best yet, I also go cupcakes to bring to your brother's which means you could keep this cake for yourself -- so long as you're willing to share with me. The photo frame has an original vinyl of Hank William Jr's music and the lyrics to one of his songs scripted on the outside. Now I know you're not exactly a jewelry person but something tells me these are pieces you won't mind in your wardrobe. The watch is one completely crafted from wood, aside from the inner mechanics to make the watch actually work. Felt like this is something you could dress up, dress down, wear whenever you like and it still looks timeless on you. Plus the brown goes with your pretty blue eyes. The bracelet has a simple white gold charm engraved with a 'C' for Colton and his date of birth on the back to keep him close to you. Of course, little miss, couldn't miss out on giving you a gift. So I drew these little figures of us and she... made us... okay, so she definitely got your eye color right, just not the sizing -- never said she was gonna be the next up and coming artist but she is all too excited to give this to you.

Guess now that the gift giving is out of way I can get to the mushy stuff. The last year hasn't been without its difficulties, but seeing your birthday and celebrating it together leads us to yet another year together. There has been no one as honest, well-meaning, and caring coming into the life of someone with a child and immediately embracing not only your old high school sweetheart but my daughter, who adores you, in case you didn't notice. We're blessed to spend another year with you and going into the next year I hope it's going to be another exciting, adventurous, crazy, passionate, year around the sun till we're standing back here again next year.

Seeing the man you've become since walking back into my life has been such an amazing experience and I realize just how lucky not only I am, but so many people are to have you in their life. There's genuinely nothing I wouldn't do to make you happy, and I realize that I've never been more happy than because of you. You have the most amazing spirit and can't wait to see what this world has in store with you through the next several years of your life. You deserve the world and hope I can give you a fraction of happiness you deserve.

So, happy birthday, handsome.

xo

Cor.

PS. Cute butt.

[kadajwifeyff7]

THE LATE GREAT POP MART MANIFESTO

Yes, the title sounds fucking insane but follow me on this.

So I’m guessing by now we all know about POPMART right? It’s become the new decentralized place to get all your dumb stupid trinkets.  all of the popular tick-tock trend hoppers are now hopping on the amazing new Labubu, or the other ones are also super expensive and low-key kind of made, but are cute working, and TikTok popular™️

No listen I do not have a problem with POPMART at all. Even I have bought some POPMART figurine not because I wanted to post them online but because I genuinely found them cute or they were part of my favorite franchises.

But I think I’m more mad at what day now represent to the mass market, which is the glamorization of overconsumption in our media, especially tick-tock, and Instagram, and all other short form platforms.

I believe this all started with the rise of sunny angels, and how companies were able to see that having dumb little trinkets that were cute while also being boring enough, but everyone could like it would make a big money. No I would never call Labubu boring or basic because I like them before they were popular. But I feel like there now just preaching to the choir if that’s the correct term. They aren’t using as many crazy ideas recently and I kind of using the same popular entities like Labubu to grow their brand. I believe there’s so much more actually opened the POPMART amusement park in China and it’s literally all just like labubu. Even though there are other, and sometimes even greater designs out there from different POPMART entities like pucky or crybaby or the smaller ones that aren’t as wide reaching and have not been in stock in sometime .

Labubu and POPMART, in general have really only become popular due to TikTok, and they need to be in a trend. Everybody when it’s sunny angels when it blew up and everyone wanted the boo-boos when it blew up and now it’s the other one turns. I can’t think of her name-skull panda! That’s the name. Everyone only collect them to seem popular and in trend. Which is also hurting the trinket community. How many times have you tried searching for your favorite figurine only to find out that it’s become “TikTok popular” and is now harder to find then the lost Ark? I literally have been trying to look for Sunny angels since like early 2021 and they are always sold out everywhere. Not because people like them but because they’re popular and owning them has become a bit of a status symbol in our society in which we are coming towards economic downfall. 

I have a personal favorite, which is the pucky roly-poly cat line. Sadly, this line its original parent line pucky, and the pucky fur roly poly line have said we become TikTok famous, of course it isn’t as bad as blah boo-boo or sunny angel but it’s become popular enough to where they are constantly sold out and I have yet to find them on places that will ship quicker than two weeks. Now I know what you’re saying, why not just buy them off of AliExpress the official store also is there!?, and while I will do that when I have the money to you also have to remember it takes up to two weeks to even ship! I love AliExpress, but I will only order something if I’m OK with the fact that it’s gonna be a little late.  I usually buy trinkets in figurines when I am either verysad or very happy and need a good pick me up. And I think that’s what trinkets should be for.  they should be for the average person having a bad day that needs a really good light in their life! Not be boring as fuck TikTok influencer, who just wants to seem popular to the now growing community of tick-tock trinket collectors 

THEM

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate TikTok. I actually use it all the time. It’s the best place for discovering or finding out more people who are interested in your special interest! I’m currently hyper fixated on the Infinity Nikki game and I have found a ton of beautiful guide and super cool people because of it! But that doesn’t stop the point that TikTok has a really bad overconsumption problem.

Whether it be make up, body scrub, or just trinkets, tick-tock, find something super niche, and not really popular in the main stream, and makes it popular! To the detriment of the original founders of said strange hobby. TikTok has ruined a lot of things for me personally. I am a big fan of the obscure Sanrio character marumofubiyori. TikTok found out about him and suddenly any and all types of March of him goes up to $200?! Mind you this character has been out of stock since at least late 2022. I can find Charmy kitty merch that cost less than that?! What character that haven’t been used since the 2010’s! One TikTok find something you love, they make it Uber popular, which while can be good for building a community can also break it by making whatever it is cost way more. This is what has happened to pop market and all other types of trinket collecting hobbies. Figurines that used to cost at most $10 now can go up to $100! Do you like Labubu? Tough shit pay me $1000 for this blue colored Labubu or get the fuck out. You like the power puff girls, and found out that crybaby had a collab with them? I literally had to go to a Reseller Kawaii store in my Little China, and this one figurine cost me almost $20?!  do you like monchhichi?? I literally paid $60 for a fucking doll hand puppet that I didn’t even know was a hand puppet?!  It’s included in my picture in the back, I basically had to stop it with cotton to turn into a plushie. It gets ridiculous, and it pushes out the people who bought these things for themselves in to make them selves. Happy to make room for people who buy it to make others happy and jealous.

It has gotten so bad that people are selling premade shrink it keychain and basket and buckets?! Like they are trinkets that somebody buys and then makes them look older or more retro and sold them at almost triple the price it cost to even make it?? And people actually buy this shit?? People spend like $20 on a makeshift trinket keychain that is commercialized and that 20 people they know probably has instead of doing what trinketer like me have always done, make our own!! Trinkets have always been the art of personalizing the unpersonalizable!! Creating your own happiness from the small objects that you are own. Tick-tock has completely ruined that by making everything commercialized and more savory for the average clout demon trendhopper! It honestly makes me feel the future of my favorite series, and if they will be scouted by resellers in the future…. 

My phone is going to die, so I’m going to end this manifesto here. I actually love ranting on Tumblr because it’s so therapeutic it’s like my own blog! I feel like a 2000s blogger Xx

 Anyways, if you truly care about something that cost almost no money, please gatekeep. Hot girls might not get keep but ugly crow bitches do. Be the ugly crow bitch. 

[causenessus]

hi my loveliness! how’s your morning afternoon or evening !! i miss you so so so much SO MUCH i’m so sorry like hhhh IM SO SORRY BUT I HOPE YOUVE EATEN AND TAKEN CARE OF YOURSELF!! i wanted to send this earlier but after work i was so so so tired and i’m still so very tired but i will try for you !!! the roles are so reverse right now like im fighting sleep and you know what’s so funny? for like an hour i was in and out of sleep and i was imagining myself writing a response and i got so disappointed when i actually woke up and i didn’t </3 BUT ITS A SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE THAT I MUST WRITE THIS !! then i will pass out

todays shift was honestly like… a fever dream because i can not tell you what happened today like i was on autopilot the whole day and i have another shift tomorrow BUT BUT ITS A FOUR HOUR SHIFT !! just a 2:45-7:30 shift YIPPE!! but my coworkers wanna go out after work tomorrow like i hope im not too tired to go but i will 100% update you on that tomorrow, i talked to my manager(girl manager!)about potentially quitting and she was so happy for me I WAS SO SAD BECAUSE SHE WAS LIKE “you’ve been here for so long like we saw you grow up !” AND ITS KIND OF TRUE LIKE IVE BEEN HERE SINCE I WAS 15 SO ITS KIND OF CRAZY and i was like awww now ur making me not want to quit!! but now im gonna quit and fly to the states and work a cute little frame retail job with ness <333333333333333333333333333 AND YES MY STORE MANAGER QUIT OUT OF NOWHERE?? like there’s a group chat for work right and she just sent a huge goodbye message and i was like WHAT and everyone(except for the managers) knew about it like it was such a shocker, unfortunately its NOT the male manager but im manifesting him reading these cutesy little haikyuu x femreader blogs since today he was soooooo DEMANDING !! LIKE !! every second i heard “mango anon do this mango anon do that” LIKE I DONT MIND LIKE it’s my job but it was because like i had a main task to do right but i couldn’t even finish it because he kept sending me on side missions and had the nerve to be like “wait u didn’t do ur main task?” HOW COULD I !! ur sending me on 20 side missions like at this point u should send me to the vents to dust it out!! but i think i am quitting this coming september because i need to start focusing on school more i think but i’ve never quit a job before so im a little NERVOUS BUT BUT OFC ILL UPDATE U !! also i can’t believe your job is making you stay another month LET ME SAVE YOU !! i’ll literally fly to the us and take your shifts for you and you can just sit relax and look pretty while i run around being a hostess(i’ve NEVER been a hostess nor do i know how it works but anything for ness anything anything for you)

update i just fell asleep i think for like 10 minutes but im back so IM CONTINUING (i’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense omg i’m just writing what comes to mind right now)

ness u are the sweetest person ever like whichever higher being decided to give me the blessing of living in the same era as you …. i dedicate my life to them..LIKE THE FACT THAT I GOT BACK INTO HAIKYUU AND FOUND UR BLOG AND I GOT TO ACTUALLY INTERACT WITH YOU LIKE I’M SO LUCKY you’re the best ever ever :(( i don’t want to stress you out with requests but ill keep that in mind because work has been so so so unnecessarily evil lately but having you to talk to has made it a lot easier for sure! and YES THE MEN ARE SO ??? sometimes i genuinely wonder what’s going in their head…. and like in a most polite way ever i feel bad for their wives because like do they not know how to hang up clothes?? is this how they treat their wives?? I HOPE DAMN NOT !! it’s so mind blowing though because in what MENTAL EVALUATION DOES ONE DECIDE “oh i found this RANDOM GIRLS INSTAGRAM and even through in a full grown man, i’m gonna go up to her and shoot my shot!!” LIKE NO??? it was such a bad day like im baffled that one would even think about that?? like im truly baffled, STUNNED EVEN! i appreciate you so much for understanding because i don’t wanna come off as like “she’s complaining about having to do her job!” BECAUSE IM COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW IM BEING TREATED AT MY JOB !! to think these are members of society is kind of scary because like i feel bad when i don’t open the door for someone whose 20 feet behind me like wdym you can give me a pile of your warm WORN inside out clothes?? and to any customer or weirdo who even THINKS of disrespecting you or being weird to you: i will definitely NOT bite your cheek lovingly… i will bite it aggressively and unlovingly and i will very cutely send pieces of your hair to an etsy witch to very cutely hex you <33333333 cutely and politely of course <333333333333333

I GET NOT WANTING TO EAT CHUNKS OF RAW FISH like even the word CHUNKS is terrible but it’s literally what it is !! chunks of raw fish!! NOW IM SQUIRMING AHH CHUNKS AHHH but like i tried covering it up with the other stuff too and it definitely wasn’t that bad but i get not being a raw fish person because that was me too !! also im still on the hunt for cinnamon almond butter! i’ve found some online but they’re like websites i’ve never heard from and personally i do not wanna risk buying from random websites LOL BUT !!! when i fly to the states and meet my favourite person ever (you!!) the first thing i want to do is literally the cinnamon almond butter LIKE IT SOUNDS SO GOOD!! the name and everything(one day for sure) like i don’t care about the american fast food places !! i want CINNAMON ALMOND BUTTER ON A BAGEL !!

also once again you are literally the cutest ever like I WANNA BITE UR CHEEK SO HARD LOVINGLY !! like i know i shouldn’t be but im so scared to actually dm you because idk my blog is ugly(LMAOOO) and im like nervous like so unserious in that matter LIKE SOMETIMES IM LIKE what do i even say ness is too cool for me her inbox is probably filled with other awesome smau writers then THERES ME(like it’s so unserious my reasonings) BUT I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I HATE DAYS WHERE I HAVE TO SEND THESE LATE BECAUSE I GENUINELY MISS TALKING TO YOU LIKE WHENEVER I GET A NOTIF THAT YOU POSTED I GET SO HAPPY !!! (no pressure to always post though !! i’m just saying it’s nice to see you’re still alive and well)

AND YES IM A SCORPIO !! i used to try to be into horoscopes but i never did get into it like I TRIED BUT THERE WERE TOO MANY FACTORS AND LIKE wdym since im a scorpio my favourite colour is red🤨🤨 like that type of thing so i was like okay im just gonna take my star sign or something and roll with it BUT UR A CANCER??? LIKE THAT MEANS YOUR BIRTHDAY JUST PASSED RIGHT? oh my god i didn’t send you a cake and a big ol gift i can’t believe it ALSO WHEN YOU SAID FRESHLY 18 I DIDNT EXPECT FRESHLY FRESHLYYYY 18?? thats so crazy oh my gosh i thought you’ve been 18 for a while(idk why i just kinda assumed) literally i will fly to the states right now and throw you a huge celebration <333333333333333333

IF U HAVE PHASMOPHOBIA WE CAN PLAY AND ILL PROTECT YOU I PROMISE <3333333 and everytime i see “you’re my mango anon” I LITERALLY KICK MY FEET AND GIGGLE LIKE it’s so cute because you literally gave me that name too and it’s so endearing to me like i remember you asking “can i call you this” and i was literally so so so so honoured like i was so :((((( (/POS) IDK IT FELT SO CUTE?? also oh my god i just had a BIG flashback and i’m like IM PRETTY SURE IT WAS YOU BECAUSE ILL BE SO SO SO EMBARRASSED IF IT WASNT YOU BUT!!! i remember you posted something before where you were talking about how you disagree about suna and atsumu being portrayed as like playboys since they’re like losers and they’d be smitten with a girl and I REMEMBER!!! I REMEMBER I SENT IN AN ASK (like i completely forgot this happened so i thought our first interaction was the one about the original love notes plot) BUT I WAS LIKE no yeah i totally agree because they’re losers! in a loving way ofc and i see them being absolutely whipped and smitten and YEAH I REMEMBER THAT LIKE IT JUST CAME TO ME RANDOMLY! i remember just scrolling through tumblr and i saw that and i immediately followed you right after seeing that because i 100% agreed with you and i just remember you being such a sweet sweet person and i think that was the first ever time i’ve sent in an anon ask?? i felt as passionate about it as you did and yeah WOW THAT WAS SO LONG AGO TOO (ness if im wrong and it wasn’t you i’m literally gonna start crying but im 90% sure it was you because i haven’t interacted with any other accounts as much)

LITERALLY ATSUMU COME THROUGH WITH THE 4 BOXES OF MAC AND CHEESE !! we literally need to have a 3am sit down at a dinner table eating mac and cheese and talking about tech because i swear i can make a whole book about my experience as a tech kid it was THAT traumatizing and OH MY GOSH IM FREE TUESDAY AND THURSDAY AND FRIDAY!! LET ME FLY IN REAL QUICK <3333333333

RANDOM INTERMISSION!! water break time, cheers with me CHEERS!! (totally off topic but i love ice water so much)

BACK ON TOPIC to the weird chefs at ness’ work… watch your back because i will not be a sweet loving anon to you … i will very VERY politely make sure u will not have hair in 1 year time …. i will literally become your work guard dog and i will be shameless about it!! AND my male manager is kind of like the “scary” manager so i guessssss he isn’t so badwko

(okay update i fell asleep while writing this and its the morning now so im gonna continue)

ALSO IF UR EVER TIRED PLS PLS PLS DONT WORRY ABOUT WRITING BACK !! i can always wait !! i just want to make sure you’re taking care of yourself and eating because i love and care about you very very much!

THE CONDOMS AND BLACK MOLD THINGS ARE SO FUNNY LIKE im sorry to break it to you but i fear you are correct… it is just a you school thing BUT actors quitting mid production is like sooooo messy because it means more rehearsals for us since we have to get people to fill in the roles and practice their characters! i always feel so bad for our stage manager because like our director kind of always put a lot of pressure on them? AND I FELT SO BAD BCUZ SHE WAS ALWAYS STRESSED like being a store manager is not for the weak at all!

I LOVE ADOPTING PEOPLE IN THE YEARS YOUNGER THAN ME!! i was in physics ap in high school right and during my last year i was the only one left in ap so my teacher had me like kind of become a tutor for the ap kids in the year below me(there was 3 of them) and they were so sweet like i miss them so much </3333 i hope they’re well </33333 BUT I LITERALLY ADOPTED THEM LIKE they were my kids !!! i felt like a proud mother when they were doing well and AHHH but me and you literally i don’t like showing people things multiple times AND ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY DONT GET IT like i know it isn’t their fault because to be honest i think im pretty bad at explaining things but that’s why i VISUALLY show it but when they still don’t get it im like HHHH AHHHHH i do know what to mean by parking the lights!! i had to know a bit of how to do lights since idk lights and sound are linked in that way (like me and you)(soulmates WE ARE SOULMATES) AND I WOULD BE FRUSTRATED TOO IF SOMEONE DIDNT GET IT because i feel like idk it’s kind of …. LIKE IF YOU SEE SOMEONE DOING IT I FEEL LIKE YOUD GET IT?? or i don’t know maybe regina george kin guy is kind of weird like that BUT THE KID YOU ADOPTED SEEMS SO SWEET AND FUNNY LOL i hope you manage to convert her (AND SAVE HER) everytime we talk about tech i miss it so much like if my director asked me to come in to help I FEAR I WOULD SAY YES!! LIKE RIGHT AWAY!! i miss the environment because it was so unserious and like the toxicity between the casts was like watching a tv show right because i was never involved but i heard and watched it all go down so ITS KIND OF FUNNY (you should tell your teacher you know a sounds person)(i will fly in AND i will accompany you)

ALSO TONICS INTRO AHHH IM OBSESSED IM SO EXCITED !! i read it just when i woke up and i was like ness ur so cool ur so so cool ness is so cool AND i will find you your irl sunarin TO TREAT U RIGHT !! or i will simply transform myself and everything to become mister suna rintarou HIMSELF (JUST FOR YOU!!) i will ward off all the weird men for you <333333 just say the word and ill contact the etsy witches i promise you <333333333333333333

HELP THE SLEEPY AND GOD CONVERSATION??? no because literally why are all discord servers the same like everyone playing into the gods role and then there’s that ONE person whose not playing into it(SLEEPY YOU FUNNY FUNNY MAN OR WOMEN)I CAN ALSO PROBABLY FIND A BUNCH OF OLD SCREENSHOTS FROM DISCORD BECAUSE LIKE… a lot of what people said had me genuinely GASPING LIKE SURPRISED BECAUSE IM LIKE oh! oh okay! (the discord quarantine experience is so real and universal i love it)

ANYWAYS I HOPE YOU HAVE THE BESTEST DAY EVER EVER!! IM SO SO SORRY THAT THIS IS LATE BUT I HOPE YOU ATE AND TOOK CARE OF YOURSELF !! my life is forever yours like i will hand you my heart on a silver platter I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH i miss you too like when i woke up literally i was like oh my god did i send ness my ask did i even FINISH IT?? (and i slept midway writing it im so so sorry work drained me) also im literally working 6 days in a row right now like… give me that overtime pay to pay for my ticket to see the actual love of my life AND IF YOU WERE MY HOUSEWIFE ID BE THE BEST BREADWINNER EVER AND BUY YOU WHATEVER YOU PLEASE i will make sure you never have to worry about anything i will literally protect and love u with my life and soul and give you all the cinnamon almond butter the world has to offer!! BUT HAVE A GOOD MORNING EVENING OR AFTERNOON NESS!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND DRINK LOTS OF WATER AND EAT GOOD!! xoxoxoxoxoxo

MANGO ANON </33333333333333333333333333333333 AAA HELLO HELLO!! DO NOT BE SORRY AT ALL!! I AM SO HAPPY TO HEAR FROM YOU AND ONCE AGAIN YOUR SHIFT YESTERDAY SOUNDED SO LATE :(( I WASN'T EXPECTING YOU TO HAVE THE ENERGY TO SEND SOMETHING IN AT ALL!! I WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FIRST ALWAYS <3 so i'm glad ur body was like?? trying to get u to sleep?? or at least made you sleep a little bit before replying 😭😭 BUT I'M GLAD WE WERE IN THE SAME SPOT LMAO last night i think i was trying to write something and once again my eyes would just randomly close and i'd fall asleep for five minutes without realizing it 😭😭 it's simultaneously like the most exhilarating and tiring thing ever?? like i love fighting off sleep and it's always fun waking up like "WHEN DID I FALL ASLEEP? WHERE AM I? WHAT'S HAPPENING" but also like i wanted to stay awake last night!!! but i was super tired </3

I'M SORRY YOU WORK AGAIN TODAY!!! :(( BUT I'M WITH YOU!! i also work a 4 hour shift tonight from 3-7:15 or something like that!! SO WE CAN BE LIKE,, WORKING IN PARALLELS!!! (i have no idea how to word that but hopefully u get what i mean!! i think my brain has given up today so i don't think i'm english-ing very well today in general LMAO) MY SHIFT LAST NIGHT WAS SUCH A FEVER DREAM TOO i'd be grabbing people menus at the speed of light and i was like "i can't believe i know how to do this all" but i couldn't think about it too hard bc it's like when you're breathing and then you suddenly realize you're breathing and then you're like "i do this on autopilot??" and then you can't stop voluntarily breathing yk?? 😭 (SORRY SIDE TANGENT) BUT YOUR GIRL MANAGER SOUNDS SO SWEET!!! :(( AND I'M GLAD SHE'S SUPPORTING YOU QUITTING!! AND I FEEL LIKE THIS IS ONCE AGAIN JUST SHOWING HOW SIMILAR WE ARE MANGO ANON!! bc this restaurant job i've also been working since i was 15 i think!! and ofc i had that little break where i quit before i've had to come back for a few months 😭 (and it is SO admirable that you have worked there for so long i could never!!! you definitely deserve to quit this place with all you've gone through though </33) but it's weird bc like one of my mother's coworkers there is also someone she's been working with since we moved to the state we live in now (when i was just a wee little baby. i think we moved here in like 2013?? idk what grade or age that puts me at and i can't math BUT IK I WAS YOUNG). like they worked at this one sushi place forever and then my mom quit and moved to the restaurant she works at now and this coworker and ended up moving to this restaurant too if that makes sense 😭😭 so that coworker has literally seen me grow up!! and that's crazy 😭 SORRY FOR THE SIDE TANGENET AND I HOPE IT WASN'T CONFUSING

THE GIANT GOODBYE MESSAGE LMAO????? i can just imagine you checking your phone and then suddenly it's a "i have decided to quit. blah blah blah yap yap yap yap yap yap yap. goodbye." message from your store manager LMAOOO (it reminds me of this one fateful day in high school i'm eating my lunch and check my phone and suddenly there's an instagram message from my sister's bf "hey. i love you and your sister so much and i know this is going to be hard for you guys now that we're separating but i just want to say that i'm still here if you guys need anything and don't be mad at her. she's an amazing person and i will always love you guys." NOT ME FINDING OUT THAT MY SISTER AND HER BF BROKE UP [only to get back together a few months later] FROM HER BF BEFORE I EVEN HEARD IT FROM HER??? AND IT WAS THE MOST RANDOM THING EVER LIKE BROTHER IT'S 12 PM ON A WEDNESDAY WHAT'S HAPPENING) THE FACT THAT EVERYONE BUT THE MANAGERS KNEW ???? THAT'S CRAZY 😭 I HOPE THAT DOESN'T MAKE THINGS MORE DIFFICULT FOR YOU FOR HOWEVER MUCH LONGER YOU CONTINUE TO WORK THERE!!

and yes!! maybe your male store manager should be reading cutesy hq x fem reader stories!!! maybe that'll soften his hard heart <33 he's kicking his feet reading a kenma x figure skating reader smau rn <33 how cute!! MAYBE HE WAS TOO BUSY READING CUTE HQ FICS TO REALIZE HOW MUCH HE WAS BOSSING U AROUND WHICH WOULD BE THE ONLY VALID EXCUSE FOR HIS ACTIONS BC OTHER THAN THAT!! grr bark bark let me at him mango anon!!! i will fight him!!! him sending u on side missions and then being like "wait u haven't done your main mission on top of the thousands of side quests i sent u on??!! how dare u!!" (i love using the words missions and quests now for work I WILL FOREVER BE DOING THAT NOW)

AND HE FR SOUNDS LIKE MY MANAGER!! like okay at my store we have the store manager (old man with a mohawk and jeep with no doors and thousands of ducks on his dashboard and is like never there bc he's so busy trying to also help out/manage other stores bc ig we just don't have enough store managers or something. also he's a little crazy bc i think i told u this but one time this guy came in wanting to frame BLACK CORAL he bought OFF THE STREETS OF SOMEWHERE IN MEXICO [black coral IS ENDANGERED AND SO IT IS HIGHLY ILLEGAL TO BE IN POSSESSION OF IT OR MOVE IT OR ANYTHING] and so we had to ask my store manager if we should even be allowed to take it in and frame the coral bc like?? technically it's not ours?? but also maybe a store shouldn't be doing that?? and he would NOT stop comparing it to "this would be like framing a pound of cocaine!!" and he kept saying it and we were like "OKAY BUDDY!! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?? DO YOU WANT A POUND OF COCAINE BEHIND A GLASS IN A LITTLE WOODEN FRAME??" anyway sorry i'll move on, but he's pretty silly), we have like manager #1 that handles all the new employees and also helps around the store, manager #2 that probably does something like that too but idk what it is (and also helps around the store) and then we have "my" manager whose in charge of the framing department (who she's kind of new to being a manager. like basically she worked there and then the old framing manager quit and they begged her to be a manager which all happened right as i was hired). and when i first started she was like "if you close with manager #2 sometimes she'll ask u to help close the store as well" (bc since we're the framing department, we just close our part of the store and the rest of the closers close the actual store if that makes sense) which like!! ig i get!! bc our closing responsibilities are a little bit easier and i don't mind helping!! but also it's not my job and i'm getting paid minimum wage for this!! and even my framing manager said it in a tone that sounded like "yeah this is a crappy thing to make us do so i would never make u do that if u close with me" so i trusted her to not be crappy!! (even though she kind of is) BUT ANYWAY WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS IS LIKE ON THURSDAY SHE HAD ME RUNNING SIDE QUESTS TOO and i was coming into the main office like about to grab paper for our printer AND to ask my manager if i could take a 15 minute break bc i knew she was in there but then she's on our radio like "and ness! will u please sweep THE ENTIRE STORE" (MIND U MY BUILDING USED TO BE A BOOKSTORE AND IS PRETTY BIG. ALSO THIS IS THE SECOND TIME SHE'S ASKED ME TO DO THIS AND THE FIRST TIME I UNDERSTOOD BC THERE WAS ONLY ONE OTHER CLOSER, SO LIKE THERE WAS JUST MY MANAGER [CLOSING REGISTERS], OTHER COWORKER [CLOSING ENTIRE STORE], AND ME [CLOSING FRAMING] BUT ON THURSDAY THERE WERE THREE!!!!! OTHER COWORKERS WHO WERE CLOSING THE ENTIRE STORE SO TELL ME WHY NONE OF THEM COULD TAKE AN HOUR TO SWEEP THE FLOORS SO I COULD GET MY STUFF DONE) AND SO THE PROBLEM is that i was going to ask to take my break!! bc the last of my other coworkers had just gotten off their break and so i was like "cool!! now it's my turn :D" BUT BC I HAD TO SWEEP THE FLOORS I COULDN'T TAKE A BREAK BC IT WAS ALREADY TOO LATE and then i closed framing and there's like three minutes left until we close so wtf am i supposed to do in that time so i'm on my phone (and i was also in the mindset of: this is my 15 minute break shortened into three minutes since i couldn't take it earlier) but my manager comes in and is like "erm...what r u doing on your phone." KYS (SORRY that day made me so mad i am now done with this side tangent!! sorry to ramble so long while ur talking about your manager but i thought you might find this funny 😭😭)

and i think it sounds like a great idea to focus more on school!! especially if your work is scheduling you so much and customers are stressful and everything </3 I WOULD TAKE OVER FOR YOU IF I COULD!! EVEN THOUGH I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT LIKE CLOTHING RETAIL!!! and yeah i mean quitting is terrifying 😭😭 the first time i quit (hosting job) i literally did it over text (felt like one of those fboys breaking up with their gf over text "hey. i think we need to take a break." BARF) and my manager (has made me cry before) literally took me out back the next day and was like "why do u want to quit?? what if we just don't schedule u as much?? or like once your workload as school lightens up u come back??" and i was like "no...i'm done lmfao." (i didn't say that. unfortunately i made up some bs like "oh!! maybe!! i would love to come back!! i just don't know when i'll be less stressed so i'll tell you when i'm doing better [which would be never] :)") and my second job (fast food job </3) i did print out some google doc two weeks notice template and they literally could not care less and i didn't care so it'll be ok!! and it sounds like your manager was super nice about it so that's good!! I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU MANGO ANON <33 WE COULD HOST TOGETHER!! WE'D BE THE BEST DUO EVER LITERALLY LIKE I THINK THE WORLD COULD PAIR US UP AND THROW US INTO LIKE A CONSTRUCTION CREW AND WE'D BUILD THE BEST SKYSCRAPER EVER DESPITE NO PAST EXPERIENCE. LIGHTS AND SOUND DUO? THAT'S US <3 HOSTING TOGETHER? WE CAN DO IT <3 BUILDING HOUSES?? AN EASY TASK FOR NESS AND MANGO ANON!!! <3

AND LMAO DW ABOUT MAKING SENSE AT ALL!! i will always be able to follow mango anon i am convinced we are literally two peas in a pod <3 on the same wavelength and everything!! and that was me last time i answered and lowkey how i'm feeling today 😭😭 i just write whatever pops into my silly little brain!!

AND YOU WOULDN'T STRESS ME OUT AT ALL MY LOVE <333 I'M SO SO SO SO GLAD I GET TO INTERACT WITH YOU!! I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE I LOVE TALKING TO YOU EVERYDAY <3 LOWKEY I ENJOY GOING TO MY HOSTESS JOB ESPECIALLY (since that seems to be where all the drama happens LMFAO i love u food industry) bc i'm always in the mindset of "omg!! what can i tell mango anon happened today <3" or something happens and i'm like "I'M TELLING MANGO ANON ABOUT THIS" like i love everyone!! but everytime someone asks me how my day is sometimes i purposely keep things away...so that when i talk to u i can tell u everything that happened if that makes sense.. (i'm sorry to ANYONE ELSE OTHER THAN MANGO ANON READING THIS I LOVE U ALL AND I LOVE TALKING TO U GUYS BUT ALSO I REALLY REALLY LOVE MANGO ANON) so definitely pls lmk if you want me to write you anything!! i would love to ESPECIALLY IF IT CAN HELP MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER!! but i cannot tell you how much it has also helped me to talk to you!! i love to hear about your days and hear your replies and literally everything i love you so much mango anon <33

DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT BEING POLITE TO MEN!! THEY DON'T DESERVE YOUR POLITENESS literally men are the worst!! i don't think there's anything going on in their heads!! and i definitely feel bad if any of them have a wife and how much they probably have to do to make up for their lame excuse of a husband </33 AND YOU NEVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HOW YOU COME OFF EITHER MANGO ANON!! ALL OF YOUR FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS ARE ALWAYS VALID <3 DON'T LET ANYONE ELSE TELL YOU OTHERWISE!! IT IS ALWAYS VALID TO COMPLAIN ABOUT YOUR JOB AND HOW YOU'RE BEING TREATED THERE!! ALL OF THAT IS REAL AND CAN BE STRESSFUL!! and once again i'm glad you may be quitting soon!! so that hopefully you can alleviate some of that stress!! ETSY WITCH HEXING IS SO SO CUTE <33

AAA CINNAMON ALMOND BUTTER <33 DO NOT WORRY!! I WILL FLY TO U AND BRING U MY FAVORITE ALMOND BUTTER AND BAGELS!!!! AND DEF DW ABOUT LIKE FINDING IT ONLINE 😭😭 when i first started buying cinnamon almond butter and had to get it off amazon/the brand's sketchy website tell me why each jar was literally like $13????? i think the one i buy now is like $7 so i feel like that's a bit better 😭

AND PLEASE!! NEVER WORRY ABOUT LIKE YOUR BLOG OR DMING ME OR NAYTHING <33 OR OFC JUST MAKE A BURNER ACCOUNT 😭😭 BUT I PROMISE YOU ARE JUST AS AWESOME AS EVERYONE ELSE (if not more awesome!! teehee <3) AND HONESTLY I LOVE SEEING U IN MY INBOX BUT LAST NIGHT I WAS LIKE "i wish i could check in on mango anon 😔 but i have no way of messaging her first" BUT ALSO I LOVE OUR DYNAMIC!! I LOVE THAT U SEND THESE AS ASKS BUT I WILL BE HAPPY AS LONG AS I TALK TO U!!! I LOVE KNOWING U ARE ALIVE AND WELL ALSO!! <3 I WILL LOVINGLY BITE YOUR CHEEK AND NOT SO LOVINGLY BITE YOUR BRAIN'S REASONING AND INSECURITIES!! BC YOU ARE AWESOME MANGO ANON I LOVE YOU <3

AND AAA OMG I LOVE SCORPIOS!!! I ALSO NO LONGER KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HOROSCOPES LMAO LIKE I USED TO BE REALLY INTO IT AND THEN KIND OF FELL OFF ("wdym my fav color is red bc i'm a scorpio" LMAOO THAT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD) BUT I DO KNOW SCORPIOS AND CANCERS ARE LIKE SUPER COMPATIBLE!!! LITERALLY WE ARE TWIN FLAMES LOOK AT US <3 AND YES my birthday did just pass 😭😭 this is so scary like i hope not a lot of people see this bc i feel bad but like i def did just round up when i started putting my age on my blog bc i was like "i'm almost 18 anyway whtvr!!!" (i had under a month </3) I PROMISE I'M NOT A BIG LIAR i don't even want to like make excuses about this bc it was super stressful for my on my birthday bc i was like "do i pretend to be 19 now?? or just keep rolling and hope no one thinks abt the fact that i'm a cancer??" but i wanted to be honest as possible and everything yk 😭😭 so i'm sorry i rounded up for a little bit AAA sorry i hope that's okay i've never mentioned this on the blog before but i feel safe with u mango anon 😭😭 so i'm saying this here 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 BUT DON'T LET THAT GUILT TRIP YOU OR ANYTHING JUST YELL AT ME IF THIS WAS A BAD THING FOR ME TO DO OR ANYTHING I'M SO SORRY (i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry pls know i'm so sorry idek what to say but i just hope this wasn't upsetting to find out?? idk?? i'm sorry </3) I WILL BE THROWING YOU A BIG CELEBRATION WITH A BIG CAKE AND ALL THE PRESENTS IN THE WORLD IN NOVEMBER!! <3

PLEASE IT WOULD BE SO FUN TO PLAY PHASMOBIA TOGETHER!! I'VE NEVER PLAYED IT BEFORE AND DON'T HAVE IT I'VE JUST SEEN CLIPS OF PEOPLE PLAYING IT AND I'D BE SO SCARED TO PLAY IT 😭 BUT IK IT'D BE FUN WITH YOU!! AND AA I'M SO HAPPY I COULD GIVE YOU THE NICKNAME!! IT'S SO SWEET AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH <3 AND YES!!!! THAT WAS ME I MADE THAT POST ABOUT SUNA AND ATSUMU BEING LOSERS IT WAS THE DAY I WAS LOCKED UP IN A ROOM FOR LIKE 7 HOURS TRYING TO GET MY HAIR DYED RED AND WAS GOING CRAZY 😭😭😭 AND I REMEMBER YOUR ASK TOO BC I WAS SO SO HAPPY TO SEE SOMEONE AGREE WITH ME!! bc i was like scared to show that opinion bc it genuinely felt like entering the community of people who are obsessed with suna smoking and being like "suna doesn't smoke" YK LIKE I FELT LIKE I WAS LITERALLY THROWING MYSELVES TO THE WOLVES BUT THEN U AGREED WITH ME AND I WAS LIKE "OH THANK GOODNESS!!" i am forever thankful to tumblr and the world for letting that post come across your feed!!! BC I'M SO SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE MANGO ANON <33

AND LITERALLY!!! PLEASE TALKING ABOUT TECH TRAUMA OVER 3AM MAC N CHEESE (MADE BY ATSUMU MIYA HIMSELF) WOULD BE A DREAM!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU TUESDAY MANGO ANON!! I WILL BUY MAC N CHEESE TODAY <3

i love random intermission!! I LOVE ICE!! I LOVE EATING ICE!! AS U READ THIS MAKE SURE U DRINK SOME WATER!!

MANGO ANON I HOPE YOU HAD AN AMAZING SLEEP AFTER WRITING THIS 😭😭 THE WAY WE WERE LITERALLY THE SAME FALLING ASLEEP TRYING TO REPLY TO EACH OTHER PLEASE NEVER WORRY ABOUT RESPONDING AS WELL!! i love you so much <3 the way you were telling me if i was tired to not worry about replying when you're HERE!! DOING THE SAME THING!! /lh (AS LONG AS YOU SLEPT AND FELT WELL RESTED AND TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF I FORGIVE U!!)

and yeah omg i'm so stressed for my stage managing duties coming up 😭😭 bc my directors also put so so so much pressure on our stage managers 😭 i remember we did "the tempest" one of my high school years and it was a show that our theatre was basically submitting to try to take to like a thespian conference?? idk if other states/countries do that 😭 and basically bc i was the light board op yk i was always right next to my stage manager and our director would ALWAYS come up and be like "YOU need to do this THIS and THIS and THIS and WHY HAVEN'T YOU DONE THIS YET? it's YOUR job AS THE STAGE MANAGER" and like she was stressed I was stressed and he was only making it worse bc then she got more stressed out and then i was stressed bc she was stressed and it just was not a good time </33 AND THAT'LL BE ME SOON!!! 😃😃😃😃 i need ur strength mango anon!!! pls come be my sound person 😭😭

AND YES!! LIKE SOMETIMES YOUNGER KIDS ARE MENACES BUT THEN YOU FIND THE REALLY GOOD ONES AND YOU'RE LIKE "omg let me adopt you and just care for you and give you every single thing in the world. u are my child now." OR AT LEAST THAT'S HOW I FEEL LMAOO AND I'M SUCH A PROUD MOTHER TOO!! i think i told u this ( i just went back to check so i'm not repeating myself and i did so nvm BUT I ALSO JUST SAW HOW MANY TYPOS I MADE MY BAD 😭😭 I FR THINK IN THE MOMENT "yeah there's no way i made any typos!!" BUT I DEF DID I'M SORRY ) OKAY SO NVM I'M NOT TELLING THE STORY AGAIN I WAS JUST GONNA TALK ABOUT HOW I WAS HELPING THE GROUP OF THE KID I ADOPTED BC I LOVE HER BUT INSTEAD LET ME TELL YOU the other groups in that class were so stressful. mango anon i had a nightmare last night about having to use an angle grinder bc they broke a drill bit trying to make a box and then all of their screws were like poking out the side of the box 😭😭 AND ACTUALLY SO THEY FINISHED MAKING THEIR LITTLE BOXES ON FRIDAY and had to use a piece of lauan (just thin wood!! idk how explain it or how much u know i'm sorry </3) to make like the back of the box AND MY KIDS DID SO GOOD I WAS SO PROUD OF THEM I TOTALLY GET IT <3

i have completely lost any sense of comprehensibility so I'M SORRY FOR HOW RANDOM THIS ALL IS 😭 BUT YES!! WE ARE SO CONNECTED I THINK I TOLD U THIS AS WELL BUT LIGHTS AND SOUND ARE DEF CONNECTED </3 there was one time a group of actors (seniors when i was a junior) asked me to run the sound board bc like no one else was there to do it and i was like "oh!! i never have before but OKAY IG 😃" BUT OMG UR TOTAL RIGHT BEING IN THEATRE WAS LITERALLY JUST LIKE WATCHING REALITY SHOWS?? LIKE I'VE NEVER WATCHED KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS OR WHATEVER THAT SHOW IS BUT I'M SURE IT'S JUST LIKE THAT LMAOOO and that's exactly why it was so easy for my directors to convince me to come back 😭😭 and like it's even better now that i've graduated!! so i feel like i'm on more equal playing ground with my directors and everything!! IF YOU FLEW TO ACCOMPANY ME YOU WOULD LITERALLY SAVE MY LIFE LMAO 😭😭 u could help me co-parent this lovely kid i've adopted!! she could grow up to be a dual lights and sound kid omg <3 MANGO ANON I NEED U TO COME HERE!!!

AND HELLO??????? BECOMING MISTER SUNA RINTAROU HIMSELF??????????? MAYBE YOU ALREADY ARE MANGO ANON <3 I THINK YOU'RE MY IRL SUNA RINTAROU <3 AND I'M SO HAPPY TO HAVE FOUND YOU <3 I AM NO LONGER CURSING OUT THE WORLD FOR PUTTING ME IN THE WRONG UNIVERSE BC I HAVE FOUND YOU!!! SO THIS IS THE RIGHT UNIVERSE FOR ME BC I HAVE YOU <3333 I'M SO GLAD YOU ENJOYED THE TONICS INTROS!! THANK YOU SM I'M SO SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT <33

I LITERALLY KICKED MY FEET READING YOUR LAST MESSAGE MANGO ANON <33 YOU ARE LITERALLY THE BEST YOU ARE MY IRL SUNA AND THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!! I WOULD BE UR HOUSEWIFE TOO IF U WOULD HAVE ME <3333333 AND I'M SO SO GLAD TO KNOW YOU!!!! I WILL BE WORKING EXTRA HARD TONIGHT TO PAY FOR MY TICKET TO SEE U <33 AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT SHIFT TONIGHT!! I CANNOT WAIT TO HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN LOVE <3 I HOPE YOU HAD A WONDERFUL SLEEP AND HAVE A GREAT DAY TODAY!! MAKE SURE TO EAT AND DRINK WATER <333

[fizzywashere87]

*read your response with a wry grin, and shakes my head with a slow chuckle*

Now I reckon it might be the fact that I’m somewhat of an old fart, but this was a trip to read little lady *affectionately* I fear I may be more outta the loop that I expected, but I appreciate the sentiments nonetheless.

*lowers hat over eyes with a small smirk*

I’m glad you like the hat, I kinda like it too. Helps with the whole anonymous factor and what not, so while I accept your invitation to be your friend, I will do so from a distance. I do enjoy a good mystery myself every once in a while.

As for the main character moment, well Hon who are you not to be your own MC? This is your story ain’t it? You adventure in the making, so don’t be afraid to write it. *shrugs casually and folds arms nonchalantly*

I’m nobody but a simple anon who lives by the phrase, “If you see something, say something.” I think it’s a down right shame that we often left fear get in the way of giving folks the love and validation so many of us often see. And I try to follow the wise words of Ghandi, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” So here I am, doing what I can.

The world can hate for no reason, so why can’t I love for no reason? You don’t need to be something or someone special to be loved and appreciated, hon. You matter and are important simply by the mere fact you exist. Don’t forget that 🧡

*tips hat at you again before sauntering back out*

wry is a funny word 😚

i'm glad my wack ass grammar and way of responding to the last one gave you a stroke!! 🥰 /pos

love that for you preppy lil baddie 🎀

are you implying that you're crazy? because like kinda same or is it my language that makes you question your existence? 🤯

hehe ur like uber mysterious its so preppy!! either way new moot- your name is 🧡 because that's the only thing you gave me- plus i like orange so yippee 🥳

OMGIE?! WHY IS THAT LIKE- it's my story guys we can have the ex lover everyone hates the best friends and the dog

look et the lil guy he's a little baller ⛹️- give him respect he's better than uhm everyone he mogs everyone 👍

that's a good phrase but you're not just an anon i don't need to know which fucker on here you are to know you're so much more, genuinely though i rlly don't know how there was much to see here but im so happy there's people like you who can look into small things like this blog and make something out from it 🫶

ion know wtf "left gear" means but it threw me off when you said down right and then proceeded to say left- (rlly had to point that out 😔🤚)

bestie i bet you looked up who said that quote to be mysterious and like wise old person type shit i caught you!! 😁🫵

why are you being so nice tho? i'm rude asf some times- and how do you somehow like tell me every thing i probably should hear?

you're important too babes without people like you everyone would be defected fetuses 🤚

that was outta pocket i'm sorry.

how tf did you come in clutch when i was like failing at life tho- uhm thank you 🫶

can i have a cool hat too?- im kinda jealous of you /not actually bc you own and rock the hat

also keep coming into my inbox you said we're friends so we're friends now 🥰

they don't have to be super cute and sweet and wholesome messages that i go about slightly like nonchalant but they make me smile every time i get them (2 but i think abt it a lot)

love you tons new anon moot

also i heavily appreciate the validation from someone probably older than me- you seem like you're at least old enough to vote so ill take it either way🫶🥰🫶🥰🫶🥰🫶

i genuinely hope to see you in my inbox often, you can sign with 🧡 unless you want a diff emoji i'll probably know it's you

HAHA I DIDNT CRY THIS TIME 😛🖕

[lqfiles]

hiiii 💕💕

i haven’t checked ur tumblr in a while but i did. and i am sooo caught up on your new smau… it’s so funny and it’s literally exactly what i needed cause i’ve been having the worst week possible 😖😖

basically i struggle with acne and i finally went to the dermatologist (it’s so expensive 😀😀) and they gave me some antibiotics to take??? but they’ve been making me feel sick on random mornings… which hasn’t been the best because sometimes it results in me 🤮 WHICH IS SO WEIRD BECAUSE I HAVEN’T 🤮 IN SO LONG??? i forgot what it feels like. i think today’s the last day i’m gonna take the antibiotics i tried for 3 weeks 😭😭 but today i had a 7 hour exam (which was hell btw) but i pulled up to my school’s parking lot and felt like i was going to faint 😭😭 and then after barfing my guts out in the bathroom i pull up to the exam like nothing is wrong and then just collapse on my bed as SOON as i get home.

now i’m cozily in bed reading ur smau, and it has just made me so happy i love renjun and yangyang they’re literally my favs <33 and the fact that you included them in the smau like… their dynamic NEEDS TO BE TALKED ABOUT MORE

- 🤠 anon (idk if u remember me but i think i sent you an ask once… i’m a lil shy but i was feeling bold today 💪💪💪)

of course i remember you you might not believe it but i thought about the other day while looking through my blog lol kinda crazy how you’re back but i’m happy to see you again hiii ^^

okay yeah i’m pretty sure that’s NOT supposed to happen omg do you think you can find some other type of treatment? you should look into the ingredients and search on google if there are other products that have the same effect. also that suck :/ trying to bond with you rn, but i got some skin issues too, my issue is that i have surprisingly very sensitive AND dry skin which is like the worst combination cos even my scrubbing my face thoroughly can sometimes result in my skin breaking out and making my skin worse 😭😭😭 i mean it’s not that bad anymore since it’s becoming warmer these days but god.. winter was BAAAD for me lol. I HOPE THE ANTIBIOTICS HELPED SOMEWHAT THO and you should definitely find alternative that don’t cause you to throw up every time.. hope your exam went well tho, 7 hours is CRAZYYY that’s literal torture??? are you okay???

also you being renyangist is sooooo real they’re kinda one of my fave dynamics, this whole smau is just filled with my fave dynamics now that i’m deeping it like i’m a huge jaemarkist, renminist and a renyang enjoyer too plss 😭😭 anyways YESS i love renyang dynamic so much they’re so cute, the way renjun genuinely considers yangyang his bff.. 😣 its very fun to see how everyone fights for renjuns love meanwhile renjun is busy wondering what yangyang wants in his hot pot 😭

[anakin-pilled]

ANDRA ANDRA ANDRAAAA my sweet andra <3 i am so sorry it took me this long to read and annotate this, i normally read everything you post within the day but life has been little crazy lately ): but anyway im so excited to that you're writing again because you are so talented and no one can compare to the way you make me feel with your writing!!!!! so happy to see false god continuing because well.....who doesn't love a dilf! jake with heavy angst WITH AN AGE GAP?!?!??!?

Why would you say that? What possessed him to confide in you about parts of his life he forsook, he gave up what felt like eternities ago?

poor jakey is embarrassed from talking to a younger hot girl HAHAAHAH

You and Neteyam were much alike, and somehow still managed to complement each other well, at the same time. He used to think you’d be good for him, back then.

👀👀 now why do i feel like something might happen with neteyam..

“I’m sure whatever it is, it’s not as bad as you think. We always tend to overthink in our heads, and, as humans, we always tend to see the worst in ourselves. You, more than most.”

i always love how you bring the human condition into all your stories because while the na'vi might disagree with and not understand this, the human condition (in all its positivity and negativity) is so beautiful and an extraordinary thing to witness AND go through.

but also i once again find myself relating to your female protagonists...its like you see into my soul ?!???!?!

“I think someone overstepping once in a while is exactly what a man who’s always obeyed needs. Go to sleep, love.” 

NOW NORM WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THIS AND WHY ARE YOU SAYING IT

Just because you talked about something he cared about, that nobody asked him about, just because he confessed to you feelings he hasn’t said out loud in more than 24 years… that didn’t mean anything.

UH OH the seeds of something have planted into jake's heart...

Any extra time spent with you is time where he could talk and say something, confess something else that is better left unsaid, fall prey to your uncanny ability to see through him, to will out words he hasn’t even realised he’s been dying to say out loud. 

NBDJKNBJENRBKJSNIODRNSOABNRK ..... ummm jake is in a pickle

Can you do that for me?”

you mean can you do that for me babygirl

Norm once told you life, especially in your 20s, was about the joys and miseries of growing pains, but if you knew, how the journey was full of polarising extremes that pulled at every fibre of your being, how the high was insurmountable, but the pain was unbearable, maybe you would have thought twice before jumping in. 

oh god this is so fucking spot on but also i love this description of the 20s its so intense and scary but that's exactly how it is

You wonder if he realised that this was the beginning of the end, if the pull you felt was the same one that drove him to what came after

now now now.....what does Eywa have to say about this

It was clear to him more and more you loved being the one asking the questions and never the one answering them, and, soon enough, here you were again, curious as a cat about things nobody else was when it came to him.

AHHHHHHHHHHH omg omg omg like its so cute but i have to remind myself hes a married man but also i do feel bad for jake because while neytiri does love him, i would be sad if i never got the chance to talk about my life before even though jake doesn't seem to look at his past fondly, i think everyone is attracted to the idea of someone genuinely wanted to know about you on a deeper level because we all want to be seen, even when we don't admit it or reject it

He looked at you, pleading, not knowing whether he needed you to stop or keep going, only knowing it hurt, being torn at the seams like that between two choices that both led to heartbreak and epiphanies he wasn’t ready to face nor strong enough to deal with on his own, especially right now.

WE LOVE EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE JAKE!!!!!!! can i just say i love how introspective you write every character you right always has the perfect characterization and you always describe their inner thoughts in the most perfect way as well

It was then you knew you were heading for a potentially life-altering, life-ending fall that would break all your bones and leave you tethered on the ground, shattered and broken, unable to ever be put back together the same. And so you tried. You broke the moment that felt eternal, even though it pained you, to know at some point he wouldn’t be looking at you the way he had been then, and asked him to go home.

THIS WHOLE PARAGRAPH RIGHT HERE????!!?!? FUCKING PERFECT!! THERES NO GOING BACK NOW OMG ITS OUT IN THE OPEN AND THEY BOTH CAN FEEL IT

i think as much as i love being like dilfs 🥰 i would be absolutely terrified to be in this situation with an older man because they just hold so much more experience and wisdom (well maybe not too much wisdom) and well im a baby and god it must be SO intimidating to be in that position and how the hell do you even navigate this fine line without falling off the fucking edge ?!?!??!?

Better than sulk all night in a corner the way I know you’re itching to do.”

OK OUCH NETEYAM DONT BE FUCKING RUDE

It took a lot to make Neteyam flustered, and so you couldn’t understand why your words affected him so much.

THERE IT IS!!!!! neteyam has to be some feelings reader. also im fucking crying because she just projected so hard in the next sentences, she must be a little oblivious or too in her head from the previous conversation but i have an inkling that she is more desirable than she thinks to multiple people

In your head, that was exactly what you needed then: some sex with some random Na'vi who wanted to show you a good time, help you forget about the one you really wanted.

THATS EXACTLY WHAT I NEED TOO!!!!

You weren’t his. You were free to do as you wished, and the thoughts that plagued him as the mother of his children was sitting in his lap, perfectly unaware, were enough to pool other feelings, like guilt and shame, and form a heady concoction of emotions that he knew sooner or later would explode all around him.

i am so interested in this dynamic and i absolutely love love love it!! because it really is so complex and there's so many layers to understand and its not black and white AT ALL but that's what makes it all the fun and i cannot wait to see where this goes

You couldn't believe he was in your room, as if by thinking about him hard enough you manifested him here.

.....that's a little strange jake and i don't like it.

“Because it’s not you, ok?! Because it can’t be you! And I don’t know if you’ve realised this, but it’s not like I have a line of men willing to mate or even be seen with a human, an alien, a sky demon. So it has to be him! That’s why.” 

NFIESBNGIBDOSG OH LORD SOMETHING IS ABOUTT O HAPPEN AGAIN AND IM NOT READY

His lips, soft and needy, not at all like you imagined them to be, ceased your pleading words before you got a chance to speak them. It took a second, just one second, for you to understand what was happening, to process the way the kiss was everything you've ever wanted and more than you've ever dreamed about, the way he was desperate and hungry for your touch, for you to reciprocate his feelings... so you did.

me rn: 💀💥

With a nod, you dropped your head backwards and knew, in your heart, whatever was next would be the beginning of the end, of you, of him, of everything you’ve both worked so hard for and yet, all you felt was unadulterated, heavenly, euphoric bliss. 

i have no words right now EXCEPT WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK girl i didn't think that they would get it so quick but um...here we are. AND HOW WILL THEY DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES AND HOW WILL JAKE HIDE THIS FROM NEYTIRI OH GOD

this was an amazing chapter pookie, even though you haven't written in a while, you couldn't even tell because this chapter was so good ❤️ IM LITERALLY SCREAMING STILL AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ANDRA WHY WOULD YOU BE THIS CHAOTIC

ꜰᴀʟꜱᴇ ɢᴏᴅ | ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ɪɪ: ɪ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ꜰᴇᴇʟ ᴀʟɪᴠᴇ 'ᴛɪʟ ɪ'ᴍ ʙᴜʀɴɪɴ' ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʙᴀᴄᴋʙᴜʀɴᴇʀ

pairing: dilf!Jake Sully x (f)human/avatar!reader

synopsis: Jake struggles to adapt with the way being next to you is making him feel.

this story will contain an unhealthy, co-dependent relationship, and dark themes (smut, mental health, death, violence, infidelity), so pls read at your own discretion.

warnings: 18+ minors DNI, angst, age-gap (23 vs 43), (a little) smut at the end

wc: 6.1k words

a/n: umm, hi there?? do you remember me? i know it's been such a long time and I am so so sorry, but I am backkk besties!!! i am so happy to finally be able to complete chapter two and I hope you enjoy because it's quickly picking up pace. i really hope this isn't garbage, i'm so so out of practice and so insecure about my writing, but i still hope you are able to understand and enjoy this, because i am so excited to finally be back writing.

ps: this story will move perspectives and timelines a lott, so i hope it's not too confusing but pls do let me know if it is and i'll figure something out xx

replies and reblogs are massively appreciated, i loveee to hear from you so much!

na'vi compendium: tanhi - bioluminescent freckles, paskalin - sweet berry (term of endearment)

series masterlist (x)

Maybe I'm just not better than this, I haven't tried Maybe life's less romantic when I don't wanna die You'd think I'd be a fast learner But guess I won't ever mind crisping up on your backburner

Jake has always felt comfortable in nature. Even back on Earth, the comfort of a bed was a luxury mostly lost on him throughout his life. It was peaceful, and comforting, feeling the ground beneath his feet, beneath his skin, malleable and nurturing, like a warm embrace. It was a given here, with the connection the Na’vi had with the world around them, with the forest surrounding them, that he would become one with it, too, that he would find solace in it. He did, most days. Just not tonight, as he lay on the slightly damp surface with an arm underneath his head for support, trying to find meaning in the stars that were still so beautiful and bright they took his breath away, trying to calm his erratic heartbeat and his wandering thoughts. 

What was that? This whole day, that conversation that was still ringing in his ears like an insipid echo, making sweat bead on his forehead and trickle down his temples, until they were one with the soil. Why would you say that? What possessed him to confide in you about parts of his life he forsook, he gave up what felt like eternities ago?

He’s never truly noticed you before. The shy, timid girl who was far too attuned to others’ feelings to be able to overlook the disdain still present in some members’ of the clan when it came to anything human, always holed up in that lab he hated, that was at odds with everything he’s come to known and too much like everything he was trying his best to leave behind. It used to be different back then, when you were young, just a child craving connection and companionship, always tied to the hip to his eldest son, Neteyam, where Spider always took more to his two middle children. Par for the course, he thought. You and Neteyam were much alike, and somehow still managed to complement each other well, at the same time. He used to think you’d be good for him, back then. Not that he’d ever tell Neytiri that, the seemingly blasphemous idea, but yes - he thought that, even before you got an Avatar. But now, the thought made him uneasy - queasy, even. It wouldn’t be right. Your relationship would be frowned upon, and the Omaticaya would never look at you and see the future Tsa’hik that’s meant to lead them, to interpret their deity’s way. You were too fragile, too tuned in to your own and others’ emotions to be able to overcome it, and it would break you. Being with Neteyam would break you. 

The night was torturous and slow, so many thoughts eating away at him like a disease. By the time Eclipse passed, he was ready for this trip to be over. Being here with you alone wasn’t good, he realises now. It was a mistake, to talk to you, to look into your eyes, to notice you. Because now that he did, he couldn’t stop. The way your Avatar body twitched in sleep, the way he couldn’t help wonder what you were doing in your human body - were you sleeping, like you should be? Was this on your mind, this night, the same way it was his? Were you cramming everything you once used to do in a day in the few hours you had in your now secondary body?

“Oh, kid. You better know how to fix this better than I do.” 

“Is the Avatar safe?”

Norm trusted Jake with his life, and still, he knew he had to ask. The scientist in him, the Avatar program leader de facto, he’s always taken every responsibility, every chance to prove himself to the Na’vi and to his late mentor, Grace Augustine, very seriously. And that included taking care of you. You were not his blood, but you were his family, and he wanted to protect you, he wanted you to be alright. And so when Jake suggested getting some much needed tutelage, he was happy to wait until the night to hear all about it. 

“You know it is.”

“How did it go?”

“Well, I think. He was right, I guess. I definitely feel a bit more comfortable outside of the village, of all the prying eyes.” 

“Amazing. Do you have plans for tomorrow?”

“I’m… not sure. I think… I overstepped.” The blush in your cheeks and eyes glued to your fiddling feet made Norm’s brown eyebrow rise, a small grimace mirroring the one marring your beautiful, soft features. Still, he placed a hand on your head, gently brushing the stray hairs that were raised from the hours of being in the cryocapsule.

“I find that hard to believe.”

“He… told me about his life on earth. About his father, and I… made a comment. I have no idea how he reacted to it, but now that I’m here, I have no chance to fix it.”

“I’m sure whatever it is, it’s not as bad as you think. We always tend to overthink in our heads, and, as humans, we always tend to see the worst in ourselves. You, more than most.”

After helping you out, making sure you were settled on your wobbly, weak knees, he gave your shoulder a small squeeze and left to his quarters, but not before telling you one last thing.

“I think someone overstepping once in a while is exactly what a man who’s always obeyed needs. Go to sleep, love.” 

The next morning, you felt dizzy as you woke up in the forest, slight groan audible with every stretch that allowed your sore muscles to loosen. You weren’t surprised to see Jake already up, busying himself with gutting a fish which would most likely constitute your breakfast. You gulped at the sight of him, veiny arms expertly handling the animal, his relaxed postured at odds with the slight frown on his face. Was that because of you? Was he mad at you? What possessed you to talk to him like he was a friend and not the Toruk Makto, the mighty Olo’eyktan? What possessed you to confess about an old crush, that died with your innocence about the world, about the same time you finally started to notice how the Omatikaya, particularly Neytiri, have looked at you all your life. 

“Um, good morning.” 

His eyes flickered over to you, lingering for a second longer than they needed to on your golden eyes before turning back swiftly, and the expression he adorned, a mixed between shame, guilt and desire, would have been obvious to anyone with more life experience, but not to you. Still, you noticed the blush in his cheeks, and couldn’t help the anxiety bubbling in your chest at what… or whom, might be the cause of it. 

“‘Morning, kid. D’you sleep well?” 

“I guess. You?” 

“One of us have to stay up and keep an eye out for predators, you know. Can’t have you get eaten before I’m done teaching you how to defend yourself.” His smile was teasing, and if it was an effort to put your mind at ease, you did appreciate it. It made what you had to say next come out easier.

“Listen, Jake… what I said last night… it was none of m-“

“It’s alright, kid. It’s been a while since anyone’s contradicted me, apart from my wife, so…” his laugh was rugged and unforced, and you couldn’t help join in at the sonorous melody that rang in your ears and all of a sudden couldn’t imagine being without. 

“So you don’t hate me?” 

Jake’s eyes settled on your own, but not before flickering to your parted lips, so focused and eager, you were clinging on to his every word, waiting desperately to be put out of your misery. 

“No, kid. I don’t hate you.” 

Jake didn’t know what was wrong with him, but he did know one thing: it was just a stupid conundrum, nothing more. He didn’t feel anything for you, he was just taken aback by someone who seemed to be a lot more intuitive and incisive about someone’s inner workings than he gave you credit for. But that’s it. Just because you talked about something he cared about, that nobody asked him about, just because he confessed to you feelings he hasn’t said out loud in more than 24 years… that didn’t mean anything. He had a mate. A mate he loved, a mate he was sworn to forever. He had a family, children, a life. It was nothing. So he did his duty and helped you, keeping a safe distance and the conversation to a minimum, outside of instructions he ought to give you. Still, despite his apprehensions, being with you was easy. You were docile and listened well, you were quiet and kept to yourself, and, in the moments you did talk, there was a pureness, a light to your heart that made his own feel lighter. 

“Good form. Now focus on the target and, when you’re ready…”

He watched as the arrow flew at high speed and travelled the length of the forest until it hit the ground next to a tree marked with an X - a makeshift target, but it did the job. 

“Release.” 

“Sorry.” Your ashamed disposition was as clear as day on your face and in your body language, and the purple twinge in your cheeks brought forth the luminosity of your tanhi and he hated himself for noticing it to begin with. 

“Don’t be. You did well. Just make sure you draw all the way back before releasing. The target’s a bit narrower than you’re used to, so you’re doing well.” 

His eyes softened taking you in. A sigh reverberated from deep within his chest and he said the words before he could stop himself, fully knowing he might regret them later. 

“Let’s focus on your tracking instead for a little while. A change of scenery might do you well.”

He knew he should leave the tracking skills for back to the village, for someone else to teach you. He should just hurry back home - to his life, to his wife, to the normalcy he’s both craving and desperately afraid of. Any extra time spent with you is time where he could talk and say something, confess something else that is better left unsaid, fall prey to your uncanny ability to see through him, to will out words he hasn’t even realised he’s been dying to say out loud. 

The ground was wet and cold, accentuated by the heavy moisture surrounding you. it still took getting used to, the air, breathing it in and out, like you were born to do so, such a colossal departure from the mask that covered your face for most of 23 years of your life. Still, it was a blessing, and one you made sure to appreciate with every breath you took. You forgot a little about it, all the gratitude, as the air felt particularly dense and thick as you took it in, as the man you now called mentor crawled skilfully like a steady, stealthy apex predator, little to no evidence of his presence other than the hand that was rested carefully on the small of your back, sending bouts of electricity all throughout your body. His voice was quiet as he spoke it near your ear, a velvet shroud that enveloped you and stirred something in you, something primal and carnal, something you’ve never felt before. What was happening to you? What was he doing to you?

“Lower, kid. The lower you are to the ground, the fainter your scent, the easier to hide.” 

“I-it’s… hard.” 

You could hear his smirk as he answered your quiet protestation, and you wondered whether he found it endearing or irksome, praying and hoping with as much power as you still had left in you that it was the former. 

“I know, girl. Guess we’ll have to train those abs for more core strength, huh?” 

You were happy your back was to him so he couldn’t see the violent blush haunting your cheeks, but even so, there was little you could do about your rampant heart or your heaving breath.

“I can hear your heartbeat like it’s echoing through the whole forest. And if I can, every other animal on a half a click radius can, too. You have to learn to calm your mind. Can you do that for me?”

Although what he was asking of you seemed impossible, considering his touch set your body and soul ablaze and your mind’s already erratic rumination seemed to reach an incandescent high, you tried, and although every muscle in your body hurt and ached, much like the first few times you allowed yourself to train in this body, you did as you were told, and, by early afternoon, you managed to track a pack of Yarik without even as much of a perk of the ear to give you away. You remember still, those early days, like they were happening to you now, as you stood here, in your bedroom, as the tears blurred the familiar space, the rock you were holding so tightly in your hand that it was cutting through your palm until all that inundated your sight was a watercolour red stain. You should have known then. What would follow. When he touched you, how it made you feel, you should have known to stay away. Norm once told you life, especially in your 20s, was about the joys and miseries of growing pains, but if you knew, how the journey was full of polarising extremes that pulled at every fibre of your being, how the high was insurmountable, but the pain was unbearable, maybe you would have thought twice before jumping in. 

You wonder if he knew, then. If he felt it, too. You wonder if he realised that this was the beginning of the end, if the pull you felt was the same one that drove him to what came after, to all he ended up putting on the line. You wondered if it was all a ploy, getting you alone, or if he truly just wanted to help, innocent and undiscerning, just a dutiful Olo’eyktan. You thought you knew his heart, and how much it hid and how much it hurt, you thought you came to know it all through all this time, but as the bleeding in your heart mirrored your gashing palm, you weren’t sure anymore. 

“Come.”

The Yarik were all gone now, unfrightened by your unassuming presence, which you took as a win. Still, you almost flinched when his now much louder voice rang above the quiet murmur of the forest. 

“Where?”

“You worked hard today, so you deserve a break. And I know just the spot.” 

Jake wasn’t sure if it was a good idea, what he was about to do, but he knew you needed something to break apart the times of pain and struggle. It was something he’s learnt, being here, on Pandora, as one of the people, that there was more to life than duty, than sacrifice and pain, then the daily struggle of fitting in, of pitching in, of simply existing. You had to live life, face it, enjoy it. And he wanted you to have that, especially now. He understood, more than most, what it was like to be inhibited and trapped to a space or a time, paralysed, literally or figuratively to your immutable circumstance. For him, it was his legs, trapping him in a body he hated and couldn’t recognise, in habits he took on just like the soldier he’s always been, because there was nothing else he could do. For you, it was your human body, that confined you to the lab, to a mask, to a life that could never be experienced fully, until now. So, despite a small part, probably the logical part of his mind, telling him he should just keep the training going or go home, he decided to share with you a place he found while hunting for food last night. And when he saw your face as you took it in, all doe-eyed and bushy tailed, ears twitching enthusiastically and a beautiful, innocent smile taking over your whole face, he knew he made the right call. He found his own smile brewing without being able to contain it, your joy so contagious, it was like the whole world shone just a little brighter than it had a few minutes ago.

“Jake… I love it. Thank you.”

The roar of the waterfall crashing on the otherwise peaceful lake almost drowned your words, and he laughed at the way you were tentatively approaching the water, as if scared that the caress of it on your skin might hurt your already aching muscles. 

“Good. Let’s see how you like it up close.” 

And with that, and a gentle tap on your shoulder, a loud splash ensued where you hit the water. He laughed yet again at the way you emerged from it, wet and startled and almost as if you could not believe what just happened. 

“I-I… you… I cannot believe you did that!” 

He couldn’t help how much fun it was, doing this, being with you - it was as if for the first time in ages, in decades, being alive was fun again. It was as if this forest was completely separated from his own, from what was waiting for him back home, the unsurmountable pressure that plagued him every second of every day, especially since the humans returned. 

“Believe it, kid. You need to learn to let loose once in a while, you know?”

You rolled your eyes, but seemed intrigued by his preposition. 

“I will if you will.” 

And so he did. And for the next few hours, life was easygoing and fun, and spending time in your presence felt like coming out for a deep breath when it felt like he’d been drowning. He’s learnt you didn’t really know how to swim, and that the first song you’ve ever learnt on piano was one you deeply related to, that he’s made you promise you’d sing to him, and he found out plenty of small things, but nothing important, or of substance. It was clear to him more and more you loved being the one asking the questions and never the one answering them, and, soon enough, here you were again, curious as a cat about things nobody else was when it came to him.

“Did you ever expect it?” the sun was still shining brightly upon you both, warming your strong, supple bodies as you floated in the otherwise cold water. Eclipse wasn’t too far behind, but right now, neither of you particularly seemed to care. 

“What’s that?” You continued floating, looking intently at the sky - focused or too embarrassed to look at him, Jake couldn’t really tell. 

“Everything. What you did, what happened. Did you ever expect it, when you were offered a place on a shuttle to Pandora?” Once again, Jake was taken aback by your propensity of asking deep, profound, intimate questions like you were asking about the weather. He wondered briefly if you realised that that’s not how most people talked.

“No… I didn’t. I didn’t care, about the job or the mission. I cared about the money. And later, about the chance to get my legs back.” 

“Do you ever miss it? Being… normal.” 

“I was given a second chance - a purpose bigger than me, bigger than the measly life I left behind. I -“ this finally got your attention, and for the first time since your first question, you adjusted your position in the water so that you were fully facing him, inquiring eyes like beads of light and focus, intent on taking in every expression, every shift in mood, every slight adjustment of his face. You tried again, this time more forceful and intense, this time almost demanding of his full attention.

“That wasn’t my question. It’s a privilege, and an honour, to be who you are…”

He struggled as he always did to stifle a roll of his eyes and the speech he’s heard a million times before, from his wife, or his Tsa’hik, from every villager of the Omatikaya, from every other tribe leader he’s ever met through diplomatic missions. The answer he always kept at the ready was caught in his throat, because you kept going.

“…but I’m sure it’s also tiring, and hard. And lonely. So do you ever miss it? Do you ever wish things could go back to the way they were? Do you ever wish you didn’t have to be there for everybody all the time?”

He looked at you, pleading, not knowing whether he needed you to stop or keep going, only knowing it hurt, being torn at the seams like that between two choices that both led to heartbreak and epiphanies he wasn’t ready to face nor strong enough to deal with on his own, especially right now.

“Kid…” 

“I went too far again, didn’t I? What is wrong with me?” 

The attempt to get out of the lake was swiftly overthrown by his much stronger physique keeping you in place, caging you in between the edge of the lake and his muscular arms. Jake wasn’t an emotional man, he wasn’t one to be overcome with feelings that could cloud his judgement, that could interfere with a plan of action and yet, standing there, in that moment, your wide golden eyes looking fearfully and surprisedly up at him, the rapid pulse of your heart clearly visible in your carotid artery running up your neck, he felt his mind clouded and his own heart trembling with the overwhelming, unexpected urge to taste you, to feel those lips crashing over his, your tongues intertwined, his fingers wander in wondrous places he was sure no one else had before. He needed you, like he’s scarcely ever needed anything else, like he rarely ever allowed himself to. But you weren’t his, you never would be. And this was wrong and immoral, and it didn’t matter - that you seemed to be able to see right through him, that everything you said cut like a knife through all the bullshit and pretence, that your pupils were so wide they were swallowing the golden of your irises, that he could feel that you wanted it too. None of it mattered. 

“You didn’t go too far. You just… see things. And ask things, no one else ever does. And it scares me, kid. You scare the shit out of me.” 

“Me? I’m nothing. I’m… just a girl.”

“You’re everything.”

It was then you knew, that the crush was not a crush, it was so much more, too much more. It was then you knew you were heading for a potentially life-altering, life-ending fall that would break all your bones and leave you tethered on the ground, shattered and broken, unable to ever be put back together the same. And so you tried. You broke the moment that felt eternal, even though it pained you, to know at some point he wouldn’t be looking at you the way he had been then, and asked him to go home. You were quiet and compliant all the way back, and he made it easier on you by a performance of the same caliber. You didn’t know if it made you feel better or worse, that the moment clearly affected him too, enough that both of you looked like dogs with their tails between their tails as you arrived back in the village, without having spoken another word to the other, without as much as risking a glance in the other’s direction.

It was for the best. There was nothing, absolutely nothing that could come of entertaining this little troubled happenstance, and truth be told, you couldn’t wait for your life to get back to normal, where he barely spoke to you and you were free to withdraw within yourself the way you knew you had to in order to heal. You were able to get over your mindless crush once before, and you were certain to be able to do it again, especially given you would had the perfect opportunity in the annual clan celebration that you had come just in time for. 

“How was it?” Neteyam was quietly hopeful about your trip with his dad, eager to be able to call you one of the People as soon as he possible could. Any effort to aid that, to allow you closer to a life he knew you deserve and knew you could make your own, was beneficial and encouraged in his mind. You loved Neteyam, and appreciate him for who he was and what he meant to you - a brother, a best friend, a confidant. You told him most things and yet, some things were just too ugly to share, and so you didn’t. Some things were better off swept under the rug, praying the lump they made was not big enough to trip on. 

“Great. I think he was right, being away from all the prying eyes helped. Guess I’ll just have to show you tomorrow. Who knows? I might even be better than the mighty warrior soon, eh?” 

He threw his head back and laughed, and you joined in his joy, already feeling better just being away from him, leisurely walking trough the village and helping out with anyone who needed a hands for tonight’s celebration. 

“Dream on, paskalin. Although, you could show me what you learnt tonight, and maybe even win a prize in the knife throwing contest. Better than sulk all night in a corner the way I know you’re itching to do.” 

“Actually, I wasn’t planning on doing that. Not tonight.” 

“Oh?” You wish you hadn’t said that, because you should have realised Neteyam would be curious and it was a subject you didn’t feel ready to talk to anyone about, especially a man, a beautiful, glorious, obviously-experienced one, such as your best friend. 

“I just mean, it’s time, you know? To try to live my life. Maybe even find someone with whom to share it with.” 

“Y-you mean… like a mate?” 

Neteyam looked taken aback by your confession, so much so that he stopped in the middle of the path, making two children bump into his legs and fall down behind him. It took a lot to make Neteyam flustered, and so you couldn’t understand why your words affected him so much. Was it so unsettling to people, the thought of an Avatar finding love on the planet that wasn’t quite home, but was the only chance at home you would ever get? Were you so repulsive as a person that the one who knew you the best thought it hard to digest that you could ever be loved by a man? 

“Forget about it, Neteyam. I’ll be at the celebration, alright? I should go get ready.” 

You left before you could hear his excuses or explanations - you knew you were sensitive, probably too sensitive. You knew you were probably overreacting, and his words didn’t have any malintent, and you knew he was most likely just taking a second to adjust to a new stage of your life you’ve never shared with him before. You knew all of these and more, and yet, your heart was tired and bruised, your mind a tumultuous whirlwind of doubt and misery. You needed time, time to heal, time to think. Time you didn't have, when the celebration was upon you.

You almost wanted to laugh now, months after that night happened, at how stupid you had been that night, how desperate and pathetic. You knew about some Na'vi, certain warriors who loved the idea of humans, of experimenting with them, of using them. You've heard the stories, you've seen the scientists coming back to the lab with them, you've been around when they talked about how good it was, how necessary the release, how passionate and life-changing the experience. In your head, that was exactly what you needed then: some sex with some random Na'vi who wanted to show you a good time, help you forget about the one you really wanted. It wasn't hard enough to find one that night, especially after you won your prize in the knife throwing competition, when the warmth of liquid courage was still embedded deep within your throat and soul, much to Neteyam's dismay. Still, the performance attracted attention, of one man in particular you cared about. Strong, 10 feet tall and muscular, he was looking at you like a meal and right then, you wanted nothing more to be devoured. You wondered what your life would have been like if that night went differently than it did. You wondered...

He barely noticed it, his wife’s touches or his clan members’ words of admiration or respect, not when the only thing his mind could focus on was the way his hand was caressing your shoulder and down your arm in gentle and intimate touches that felt too familiar for two people who have seemingly barely ever interacted before. His skin crawled at the sweet, shy smile you were sending his way and at the slight tint of purple he could see in your cheeks. You were too pure for this, Jake knew. Too pure for the intentions clear on his face that he didn’t think you fully understood, how this was all a game, a conquest, how you were a prize to be won, a trophy to be paraded around to the Na’vi who loved to brag about fucking the Avatars, the humans, the aliens. It was a game to him, and you… you weren’t a game to be played, not to Jake. 

To his surprise, he realised he was angry with you. Angry that you were humouring him, that you were giving into it, that you were enjoying it. That guy was not good enough for you, and you should know that. You should know that for your first time being touched, being someone else’s, you needed someone who knew how to handle you, how to make you feel good, show you what it feels like to give in to your wildest dreams and fantasies. You needed someone to teach you. The fury bubbling just beneath the surface worried him.

You weren’t his. You were free to do as you wished, and the thoughts that plagued him as the mother of his children was sitting in his lap, perfectly unaware, were enough to pool other feelings, like guilt and shame, and form a heady concoction of emotions that he knew sooner or later would explode all around him. None of the feelings trumped the relief that washed over him as soon as he saw Lo’ak approach the two of you and break apart the scene, and right then, in that moment, Jake never felt more grateful for his troublemaker son and his propensity for meddling in other people’s business.

You looked disappointed with the interruption, slightly irked at his son and at the way the hand that was running up and down your thigh was now vacant from the spot you obviously thought it belonged on. The boy was clearly annoyed at Lo’ak, and a smirk breeched the carefully constructed expression resting on the Olo’eyktan’s face - annoyed or not, everyone knew better than to challenge one of his sons. So, with a careful goodbye, he was gone, leaving you gesticulating widely in his direction and clearly despondent with the outcome. It wasn’t long before you left for your tent, and Jake knew that if he was to survive this night, he’d have to be careful not to give in to the one thing he wished for the most in the world. 

Your shower was hotter than what you were used to, hot enough to hopefully scald away the shame and embarrassment you felt now that you were sober once more. Your life seemed to be comprised mostly of those, recently, and while it was somewhat easy to forget how badly you fared in training your Avatar body once you got back to your bedroom and the safe confines of the labs, this new, fresh development lingered like a cold sore, painful whenever you remembered it. Did anyone else apart from Lo’ak see you, shamelessly flirting and allowing a Na’vi warrior to feel you up? Did everyone know how desperately you wanted someone to take you away and make you forget about the one man you actually wanted, the man who made all the other ones pale in comparison, the one man who you couldn’t have? You knew it was so wrong, how badly you craved his touch, what effect even a fleeting image of him in the back of your mind had on you, how your slick was running down your legs, how your brain couldn’t stop conjuring all the ways he could teach you how to be, how to love, how to live. How you knew his touch would ruin you and put you back together, kill you and finally bring you to life. 

As you fastened your towel onto your body and opened the door to your bedroom, you were startled to find the one man you couldn't shake from your mind sitting on your bed, eyes wandering over your barely dry body.

“God, Jake, you scared me!”

You couldn't believe he was in your room, as if by thinking about him hard enough you manifested him here. He was so tall, so much bigger than you as you stood now, in your human body, frail and delicate and so easy to break. He barely fit on your bed and in your room, taking most of the walking space, so much so you struggled to adjust your position to face him properly.

“…What are you doing here?” 

“What were you doing with that grunt at the party?”

You couldn't believe your ears, settling on a double take as you considered his question carefully, mulling over every word in your mind, as if doing so will finally reveal a secret meaning to it that you couldn't quite understand yet.

“Pardon?” 

“You heard me, kid.”

His words were dry and humourless. There was no levity to them, or to the situation, the room filled with thick tension, and for the first time in your life, you were almost...scared of him. Why did he care?

“I… he… we…”

“That’s what I thought. Why him? If you want someone to mate, I’m sure there’s better options out there.” 

“I don’t want to talk about it, Jake.”

You started turning around, dizzy from the way his presence was making you feel and tired of giving him so much power to do so. You didn't manage to, though, as his large hand caught your forearm and held you in place, and when you were forcefully turned back to look at him, you saw it all. The hurt. The anger. The... betrayal. The jealousy.

“No, this isn’t how this works. You always ask questions and get me talking about shit I haven’t said out loud in decades, or ever. You’re not going shy on me now, not anymore. So why him?” 

Fuck it.

“Because it’s not you, ok?! Because it can’t be you! And I don’t know if you’ve realised this, but it’s not like I have a line of men willing to mate or even be seen with a human, an alien, a sky demon. So it has to be him! That’s why.” 

“Kid…”

The tears were pooling in your eyes like beaded pearls making your vision blurry, and the struggle with which you've been trying to remove yourself from his grasp finally paid off because you did it, you finally manage to break free, but it was too late. You were exhausted, and you knew it was time to lay it all on the table, once and for all, for him to know, and to disprove, for him to break your heart so you could finally move on.

“No, Jake! You’re in my head, all the time. It’s messing with my mind, the deluded reality I’ve been living in. You talk to me, and you notice me, and you give me attention. You touch me, and you look at me like…”

Soft sobs broke your words apart and let their meaning linger all around you, sounding like infinite echoes in the room. It would all be over soon.

“...Like you want me. And I know you don’t, and I know it’s not real, and it hurts me! So I need something else, I need someone else, I need someone to show me there’s other men out there, to pull me out of this nightm-“

His lips, soft and needy, not at all like you imagined them to be, ceased your pleading words before you got a chance to speak them. It took a second, just one second, for you to understand what was happening, to process the way the kiss was everything you've ever wanted and more than you've ever dreamed about, the way he was desperate and hungry for your touch, for you to reciprocate his feelings... so you did. And you melted under his touch, and before long, the whole world disappeared from view, and there were no consequences to your actions, and all you knew, all you needed... was him.

You were both panting when you finally came up for air, and all you wanted was more. More. A little more. Always more.

“Fuck, kid. You’ve got no idea how much I want you. But I’ll show you.” His hand wandered down your much smaller body, until his large fingers found the knot of your bathrobe, that he skilfully undoes, before sliding them over your soaked folds. “Shit. Look how wet you are for me. Let me show you, please.” 

With a nod, you dropped your head backwards and knew, in your heart, whatever was next would be the beginning of the end, of you, of him, of everything you’ve both worked so hard for and yet, all you felt was unadulterated, heavenly, euphoric bliss. 

Maybe I blame my mother bleeding into my stride Maybe it was my father and his wandering eyes (It's their fault that) I'll always be in your corner 'Cause I don't feel alive 'til I'm burnin' on your backburner

taglist:@yagirlheree @mashiromochi @deepdarktower @tojisleftarm@childofgod-05 @youngpersonaathletebear @cinetrix @hinataashoyos @i-live-in-a-fantasy-daydream @misscaller06 @v1l-ismissing @legendarynoodlebowl@analuw @imjustcal @the-fractured-eye @pandoraontop @sweetirilly @kouyoumarryme @blxkstar @ok-boke @myheartfollower @the-mourning-moon @pandoraslxna @jakexneytiri @blue-slxt @kingjulian0o9 @erenjaegerwifee @babyduk213 @@toocoldoutsideforyou

[betbeton]

✃ Do Not Collect €200!

Various TR Men Odd Habits

Mildly Suggestive

18+ Below Cut

·GN Reader·

·A/N - i am probably the only one here that low key simps for shion 🤢·

HQ Version

・❥・ Masterlist

⪧ Sano 'Mikey' Manjiro

Always has his toes out no matter the weather

It was below freezing and there stood your partner clad in a fluffy winter coat, pilfered from your closet, and soft fluffy pyjama pants. It would be quite a cute fit for running to the convince store in the middle of the night if his fit wasn't topped off with sandals, normally you wouldn't complain after all it is his body to clothe who are you to intervene.

Alas though it does become your problem when he inevitably begins complaining about the snow coating the ground up to his ankles. With an exaggerated sigh you stooped down when his complaining reached the point you worried he would catch the attention of anyone passing by on their way home, hands cupping as you motioned to your back a silent signal for him to jump up.

Even if his insistence on being a mild hazard to his health grated on your last nerve you wouldn't trade the happy little grin that lit up his face when you offered him a piggyback ride for the world. That smile was something that kept you going on gloomy days and set your heart ablaze when you were irritated after an argument. It was also the reason you were carrying Mikey and the plethora of snacks he purchased back home at almost midnight, all to see that little grin tug at his usually stoic face.

⪧ Shion Madarame

Latches onto your neck like a leech in public if he is ignored for any length of time

You had turned your back to him for five seconds to order ice cream for him. You should have carded a hand through his hair to appease him before you did it maybe then you could have avoided the horrified gasp of the poor cashier when this wild eyed delinquent cupped the front of your neck and latched onto your spine with his teeth like he was trying to rip it from your body. As aggressive as his snarl he let out while biting you seemed he really wasn't doing it all that hard, but he did have a reputation to keep up so there he was holding you by your neck with his large hand and teeth while you stood with a blank expression on your face. The cashier looked close to calling the authorities when you piped up asking if you could order all while the blonde was still attached to you. With a wobbly nod they took your order and scooped it up before handing you the cone, which you promptly held out to the side making a noise like you were calling a cat. As comical as it was to you, you could see how crazy the cashier and fellow customers thought you were and you didn't blame them.

Though if you genuinely cared about their stares you wouldn't be dating someone as wild and uncaring as Shion. And the wide open mouth grin that split his face as he unlatched from your now spit covered neck to grasp the cone, leaning in to pepper kisses across your cheek as thanks, was something you would gladly knock heads over if anyone voiced how odd his actions were.

⪧ Haitani Ran

Humps you if you bend over, he finds it hilarious

How you had forgotten your partner's habit was baffling considering he does it almost unconsciously at this point, but sadly for everyone at your dinner party you had forgotten. You had been on autopilot when Takeomi and Mocchi had asked for an ashtray, bending at the waist to grab it from its hiding spot under the kitchen sink right as Ran had passed by you to grab a bottle of booze. The memory of his habit flashed through your mind the moment his large hand curled around your hips giving them a squeeze before he let one harsh thrust bash his pelvis into your ass. The impact was boarder line painful, and almost sure to leave even a mild bruise on one or both of you. After the dull smack of his body against your own had sounded through your now deathly silent apartment you stood abruptly ready to whack him with the ashtray now firmly held in your hands only to be stopped by Rindou letting out an annoyed groan before speaking.

"Can't you wait to be nasty until we leave?"

That only tugged a cackle from Ran as he threatened to do it again only to be bopped over the head by your fist.