#she's the main fucking character of the movie it makes EVERY sense to show her on screen

[andorerso]

I'll be real, I don't think it makes much sense for Cassian to only start looking into Jyn after the meeting with Tivik. I mean yes, the timeline of Rogue One in general isn't 100% clear, but Cassian has already known about Galen when Tivik mentioned his name to him, which leads me to believe they already had some kind of intel about Project Stardust and that Galen was involved in it. which in turn makes me think they were likely already looking at Jyn as a possible mark. not to mention that Bodhi was already on Jedha when the meeting with Tivik happened, and since I don't think that much time passed between that and Jyn and Cassian going to Jedha, Jyn had to have been rescued from Wobani around the same time. and honestly, I don't think Cassian could have put together her file and found her that quickly.

is it possible? technically yes. but I find it far more believable that Jyn was already in the picture when the Kafrene meeting happened.

there's also this from the novelization:

they know about Galen. they know about Saw. there's no reason they wouldn't already be looking into Jyn, the girl who connects them both. just as a precaution - even if they aren't yet sure she's important.

[pzychojinx]

as I said, act two left me with genuinely mixed opinions. that said, I slept on it and I think I'm able to verbalize it a little bit.

let's start with what I think went right in this act. first of all, obviously, the animation and art. if possible, they're outdoing themselves. I love the experimentation, I absolutely adored the pastel tones they used for vi and jinx's childhood memories, the way isha's point of view sequence feels like it's straight out of a ghibli movie, I loved the distortion effects used on jayce and every single visual effect they used for viktor to convey this sense of absolute inhumanity, the entire messianic visuals were insane, warwick was gorgeous especially during sequences where we didn't get to see him but rather we got to see the camera following his massacre. gorgeous. no notes.

episode four, in my opinion, was near perfect plot-wise too. seeing the new state of the military situation in zaun, getting to see sevika as the rallier of the revolution, isha's drive to be a fighter for zaun leading her to impersonate jinx when needed, the whole mission to enter stillwater - I genuinely think it was incredible. most of all, it was probably my favourite jinx episode to date. and that's saying a lot. this is a character I've resonated with and held very very close to my heart for three years now. seeing her gain not only a younger sister through whom there could be a process of reclaiming her own past, but also very importantly seeing her gain new objectives and seeing her gain community, was deeply healing and heartwarming to me. that one scene where her followers touch her, not only as an idol but as an equal, is so so moving and good. isha was the kickstarter to jinx's reclaiming of powder and a sense of stability, sure, but living in a fantasy with isha alone could have very easily led her to the same old mechanism of co-dependency - thus never breaking the cycle that silco himself perpetrated onto her. but no, they made her respected. they made her see a nation of people who saw something in her. they gave her goals, even if she reasonably only started giving a fuck about said goals when her sister/child went missing. it was everything I never thought could happen to her. it was healing.

episode five is where the issues start, I think. first of all, there's been way way way too much space dedicated to the black rose. much as I love mel, much as I find her truly intriguing, her plotline is so severely disconnected from everything else and it feels un-cohesive. before s2 started, one of my main fears was that they would give noxus an excessive screentime in order to prepare the viewers for a future noxus project and I hate to see that I was right. this leads to the second issue, which is pacing. and specifically, vi. vi stans, how are you doing? because to be fair, the show kind of fucked you over and there's no sugar-coating it. the fact that vi's fighting pit era lasted three minutes was genuinely ridiculous. the entire plotline involving her, jinx and warwick in episode five was way, way too rushed in order to make space for black rose content - and again, I love mel, I love ambessa. but there's no doubt something was off here in terms of pacing and screentime. now, I don't think the episode was bad. I loved the dynamic between jinx and vi. with jinx having gained some sort of a stability (at least, for her standards) and vi having nothing else to lose, the fact that their conflict turned into a half unwilling cooperation felt very real and believable to me and I loved their interactions, especially in the micro expressions; it all screamed family bond where something went awfully wrong but here we fucking are and the love is still there at the roots. I just, you know, would have liked to see more of it. the final hug with warwick felt, to me, less earned than it could have been if we just had a little more time with these characters in this arc. was it emotional? sure, but could it have hit harder if the episode was just structured a little bit differently, a little more cohesively, especially regarding vi? yeah. and another question: would the zaunite revolution arc have needed more than just one episode before being pushed aside and sort of forgotten? probably, yeah, even though there's no comparison with how vi's arc was reduced to three mins. so again, pacing issue. still, I had no particular issues with the plot and the contents of the story itself. I would say episode five was rushed, crammed and structurally weak, but the story still hit me in all the right ways when it needed to. vi and jinx's reluctant steps to some sort of understanding hit me hard, in spite of any structural weakness.

episode six... well. episode six leaves me so conflicted. 'cause the thing is, it's dope. I think it's a fucking bomb. they managed to fit nearly (nearly - mel being, again, dissociated from the main storyline and in this case, absent) every character's plotline into a cohesive arc. it kept me on the edge of my seat near the whole time. there were so, so many things I absolutely adored - the imminent attack on the commune from ambessa, the way they managed to make warwick a center plot point and use that plot point to show us both the benefits and the limitations of viktor's hexcore messianic utopia cult, everything regarding jayce's return (whom is getting so much hate, but come on, it's clear the man has seen Some Things), the way the episode starts off with a plan but not necessarily a sense of deep urgency and then the urgency slowly creeps in and it explodes into a fucking battlefield. again, warwick. vi and jinx's slow re-building of some trust, slow reclaiming of family love. viktor. man, I adored their work on viktor. I just found it dope. the thing is, episode six has two major, major issues that I just can't seem to get past and this time it's plot issues, which makes it worse than 2.05 for me.

the first one, caitlyn. sure, I get that caitlyn wasn't fully onto ambessa's methods. but there's a very huge leap from 'I distrust this person and I question her methods' to 'my ex told me that this savage monster that just brutally mauled our men is her father so I'm just gonna help her save him'. like jesus, come on. caitlyn deserved better than this. (again, shoutout to vi stans, cait stans and caitvi stans, they did you dirty.) especially when I think they did such a good job on her descent in act one. the second one, isha. look, I'm gutted if she's dead. like fucking gutted, mourning, red-wedding level in shock, like, can't even think about it without wanting to cry. but this is not just an emotional thing. in fact, I love some good angst. no, this is a narrative issue. they spent the entire act - the entire season - building up jinx's healing and to take it all away like this, to bring her back to step one, just feels like fucking trauma porn for the sake of it. it feels unnecessary and cheap, and cheapness is the one thing I can't forgive arcane. like, what was the point? why not have her spiral from 2.01 if this was the direction? it's beyond me and it makes me feel so bitter, so sick, that at times it's hard for me to remember that there were so, so many things I adored in these three episodes. again, 2.04 is up there as my favourite jinx episode to date. 2.05 gave me some of my favourite siblings moment in the entire show. 2.06's work on viktor and hexcore and magic is otherwordly. I'm so glad I got these episodes, genuinely. and yet.

'cause the thing is, - not considering the isha thing for a minute - aside from my critique regarding caitlyn, and aside from having to make peace with how rushed/crammed the pacing is, this show is still absolutely gorgeous to me. it's still gorgeous art to me. sure, s2 has its very real issues. and for sure, it's absolutely reasonable to recognize them, critique them, and still find it an incredible story. but this. fuck, this could change everything to me. if isha's truly dead, then it means they wasted six episodes on what could have been one of the best, most genuine, most earned stories of unexpected healing I'd ever seen on my screen just to throw it away and I'm not sure how to forgive them for that. episode six itself was dope. episode six isn't really where my gut-deep fear and bitterness comes from. it's where it could lead from now on. I'm so holding out hope on ekko saving the day, even if it's a deus ex machina. it's a deus ex machina I'd accept if it means not throwing away jinx's entire road to recovering. but I don't know, guys. I don't know. making her spiral as a general s2 choice would have been one thing, and I would have been on board, but this is something else entirely. this is cheap betrayal and if true, if confirmed, if real, it's a sour taste.

[restinslices]

Ngl now I wanna read MK1 LKBS reacting to Twilight in headcanon bullet point format 😭

Pretend I put a joke here

Bi-Han

Bi-Han probably hates a lot of things 

Twilight is quickly added to his list 

You know how you can hate a movie, show, book, whatever but have a favorite character? That doesn't happen with Bi-Han

Fuck Bella, fuck Edward, fuck Jacob, fuck EVERYBODY 

The fact that he managed to finish the first movie is a miracle. He for damn sure ain't watching the rest and/or reading the books. You gon have to stab him 

“I'll divorce you if you don't” “I'll get the paperwork for you”

I don't think he'd like any parts of it. There's not a single redeemable thing in that movie 

The type to get mad at Bella and pause the movie to do a lap so he won't destroy the TV 

His main question is “why are y'all doing all this for a girl you hardly know?”

I legit don't think he'd enjoy any parts of it. MAYBE the soundtrack, and that's a big MAYBE 

So many things would bother him. Why is stalking romantic? Why are you risking your family's life for a girl you hardly know? Why is Edward not considered a pedo? How has he not met someone yet? Why is Jacob stuck on her?

There is nothing redeemable about Twilight to him. I think every minute for him is agony 

I don't think any of them like Twilight but I feel like he hates it the most 

In turmoil

Kuai Liang

He doesn't like it either but he tries to be nice and hide it 

He hides it poorly 

A very pained smile whenever you look over at him 

“You like it?” “Yes… 🙂” “Great! Let's watch New Moon!” “There's more?😧”

Does he watch the others? Possibly 

Will he read the books? No

I don't think he'd be fond of any of the main characters either

He’s not a fan of love triangles and he also just doesn’t like the characters

Favorite character? Maybe Angela 

She gets hardly any screentime so she can't do any wrong 

That soundtrack is nice tho-

I don't think he's in as much agony as Bi-Han, but I don't see him liking Twilight 

I'm not even sure he's even into romantic movies 

Do I think he's against romantic movies? No. Do I think it's his favorite genre? No. It could be like, top 5 or something 

This isn't me jumping on the Twilight hate train because I like Twilight in a sense, but I just don't see any of them genuinely enjoying it and being apart of the Team Jacob vs Team Edward debate 

He for sure ain't rewatching the movies 

His niceness is only going so far. At some point he gotta deliver the news to you 

Bella's lullaby is his shit now tho 

Tomas 

Supermassive Black Hole is a nice song 

So… he doesn't entirely hate it 

Like it though? Um… he likes that you like it

Unlike the other two, he'll read the books but he's only reading them because he's like “these movies gotta be popular for a reason. Maybe the books are better”

Does he finish? Probably not 

The love triangle ain't even balanced fr, so he's not really intrigued by that part

I can see him being into the supernatural stuff but I mean, it's not like it's super expounded on 

Is he Team Edward or Team Jacob? Neither 

Bi-Han hates everyone, Kuai Liang doesn't like love triangles, Tomas doesn't like Bella 

Playing both sides when it's convenient for you is something he's not fond of. Pick one and stay on that one 

Who’s his favorite character? He jumps from side characters 

The main characters are probably never his favorite. They're always doing something that makes him raise a brow 

I can possibly see this becoming a series he hates so much, he feels the need to rewatch it 

He spots plot holes and now he can no longer unsee them

He really does try to pick a team if you want him to but it's like “I know who she ends up with so what's the point?”

The point is to be part of the community Tomas 

“I thought you didn't like Twilight” “I need background noise” “...” “I need to feel something” “I get it”

Love hate relationship 

He just like me fr 

[xanderjkz]

Knox Overstreet- Fixing the problem of a kind boy

I like fucking love the concept of Knox's character and the message he portrays but holy shit they really fucked up when it came to the execution. Both in the movie AND book (ESPECIALLY there). This fandom takes its time to reconstruct his character to be likeable. But how would this actually play out in a better-constructed storyline for this dude with girl problems?

Well, that's the answer I would like to answer today

Knox in the official dead poets media

Like every poet in the movie Spotlight, Knox comes from a family that's enforcing the path of a lawyer. His father is one, which is how his storyline even starts. He is invited to the Danbury's because his dad helped the only responsible and well-mannered dude in the house. And in that same scene, they literally tell us that people expect him to be a lawyer. So there's this kind of pressure.

But not really because we never get to see that side of Knox in the movies where he clearly states that he doesn't like the path people chose for him. All he has is girls problems.

Which is sad considering that he could be so much more

But then we'd have to extend the movie by about 1 hour and that would make it unenjoyable because this movie is perfect because of the pacing they chose. It's fast and yet slow and kinda counts down to Neil's suicide in a way that gets stuck. Because he is one of the main characters and most scenes should be with him. Not with Knox considering if his life expectancy is okay.

So is there any extra scenes in the book?

...yeah no

"But how do we solve this issue with knox's awful storyline?"

Rewrite the book and hope for the best.

Since I'm an author myself I know that writing often gets complicated when your creative streak is gone but since I'm an author I'd solve it this way:

Keep the Chris storyline

Let that boy be problematic, let him make mistakes but not once that deeply traumatises someone like SEXUALLY ASSULTING someone. Knox is the message bringer of the bad side of carpe Diem. Sometimes seizing the day will make things worse because you didn't think it through. That's a great message to bring across, I mean how many 16-year-olds make mistakes that we thought were okay? A lot, and he is the one who made the mistake in the story.

"So how would you change his mistake?"

The storyline reinvented

He meets Chris like usual

Look he didn't fuck up here in the slightest. I too would be stuttering if I met a beautiful girl. And him meeting her through the Danbury clearly shows the problem he has to date Chris. It's classic anyway

Cut the bike scene and use his sister instead

From what I gathered his sister goes to the same school as Chris (can be mistaken but for this story she does! ) so he uses her to kinda pry into Chris's life and find things out. It is problematic if he literally implies stalking her but c'mon, at least someone in the Overstreet family has common sense and only observes in the distance...right? Besides who doesn't use their siblings for their advantages? Plus it brings depth to that mean. Seeing how he treats his sister could indicate his behaviour with people extremely close to him.

Let him attempt the party but be extremely obnoxious

That's what he's best at

His nickname is literally knoxious. But what the hell do I mean by being obnoxious? Let that boy not leave Chris's side. Why? Because that sets up his mistake. Being attached to someone's hip can be extremely uncomfortable and with Chet's provoke able (?) ass this can go wrong fast. (Also we can't forget that Chris is the one being played around like an object in this and this should be his biggest mistake as we do not treat anyone like that, especially women!) But what would be the breaking point for CHRIS and Chet and the thing where he decides that "carpe diem" is good to use (even tho it's not)?

HE DANCES WITH CHRIS

Okay, instead of him being an ass and kissing Chris, he's an ass and dances with her. He was under the influence when he made both decisions which isn't an excuse but something that pushed him towards it. Because Knox in his most sober self wouldn't even talk properly to her.

So, some lame-ass song from the 50s is playing and he grabs her hand. Maybe she danced with someone else and he stole her. Considering that the tension between Chris and Knox is already uncomfortable, this would bring it to the maximum. Chris (as the beautiful woman she is) would try to use this moment to finally talk about his behavior so he lets her go. And the moment he finally talks chet comes in.

This small synopsis is weak but let's be honest, no one would read a whole ass script abt this.

Anyway

Chet comes in, the situation becomes way out of control and the only person getting extremely hurt is Chris. As she was toyed around by Knox and Chet. So she leaves the party prematurely (as she should, take care of yourselves) and Knox returns to Welton with the same bloody nose as in the movie

He goes directly to her house

Him doing so is a direct response to his failure. Between the party and them talking he needs to reflect on his failures and feel genuine guilt. It sucks that he can only do so once he gets punched but at least he has the mind to realise that.

But Chris isn't that easy to talk to. Obviously, this whole thing made her feel weird and sad so she avoided both of them. When he goes up to her house and gets rejected? He talks with Keating.

Mentor Keating

Not only would this solidify his last scene in the movie more but it also gives them a connection more than Keating humiliating him. Okay, but can we fit this into the movie? Not the conversation but he could easily fit it into the scene where he returns to Welton after talking to her.

"What would Keating tell him?"

The same thing he told Neil. Honesty.

Fate decides itself in the decisions you make and Knox knows that lies won't wrap her around his fingers. So maybe honesty carries them to a state where they can be friends.

So his masterplan gets made and it's the most trope-st shit you can think of.

Throwing a rock in the night at her sweet sweet window

Why did I think of this? Well, do you like the scenery of how he originally apologised and made everybody look at her?

At least it's at night so fewer people look and it would show us the skills he earned from sneaking off bc of the poet's meetings. Thus showing the audience more connection to the group. Plus at night people are mostly at their most vulnerable time and it would get Chris to talk.

But what would they talk about?

Considering that he finally saw the wrong parts of his obsession with her, he would give her the space to express her discomfort to its fullest after he of course apologises. But I think Chris wouldn't even express herself to the fullest because she has sympathy for him. She understands that loving someone can make you sick and twisted when you're a teenager but she is still her flesh and mind who clearly didn't want it to cause her relationship to break.

She might not express the worst anger that comes with something like this but she still expressed her sorrow in this mess. And Knox listens and sees the wrong in his actions. He doesn't need to justify himself because no justification could make this play in his favour. And when all is said and done, she forgives him for being so damn obnoxious.

But she doesn't like him in the way Knox wishes her to feel. And knox needs to learn to accept it. Like we all do

The story progresses without knox getting what he wants

Through this whole story he went through, we as viewers get the message that even if you apologise, it's up to the victim of your actions to give you what you want. And throughout the film, I never even got the notion that Chris has an interest in Knox. Hell, they don't even talk that much to build a conclusion on their goddamn relationship before he kissed her. He sets the message of a "Carpe Diem" gone wrong. After that, he is a reminder of us humans and our way of going through those problems you cause.

There are probably better ways of doing his arc, heck give him a different one. I mean he has potential. Maybe he's better off once the group splits or maybe he isn't.

But the way he is in the movie is a horrible portrayal of romance. I get it, the script is from the 80s but c'mon you're allowed to admit that it's bad.

Well, there's nothing we can really do, the movie in itself is an art and should be viewed as it. It fits into the zeitgeist of past generations and our present ones. I love the movie but if I had to change one storyline it would always be Knox oversteet's

Btw can be talk about how stupid his fucking name is? Who names their child Knox? With the last name OVERSTREET

[ordinaryschmuck]

Alright, last time ever that I’ll talk about Velma. I promise.

Because I’ve been extra salty towards this show all week, and I don’t want to take it further than that. Talking nothing but bad stuff about this show for the entirety of its run is exactly what the writers want. They want us to hate watch it so we can talk about each new atrocity the show brings up week after week, and call us haters or anti-woke propagandists. When, in reality, they don’t give a FUCK about any of that. They don’t care about other races, genders, or sexualities. They just WANT you to think they do. Know how I can tell? Because I’ve SEEN genuine attempts of representation.

THIS is a genuine attempt of representation. Matt Braly, the series creator of Amphibia and a Thai-American, felt like Thai culture was underrepresented in media. So, he not only made his main character and her Thai, but he also dedicated subplots and entire episodes showcasing the culture he wanted to represent.

THIS is a genuine attempt at representation. Dana Terrace, series creator of The Owl House and open Bisexual, wanted a main character that was explicitly bi to finally help kids feel like they’re seen. To help give the representation SHE always wanted.

But when I look at Velma? None of it hits the same.

This isn’t a genuine attempt for representation. This is Mindy Kuling turning a character into a self-insert to make herself look smarter than everyone else and the most important person in a narrative. Truth is, this Velma is nothing more than a sociopath, narcissistic dipshit who thinks she’s better than everyone else but is actually more aggravating than endearing.

So...Good job representing YOURSELF there, Mindy.

And this?

This isn’t representation. This is a shield.

A way to protect the show from any criticism because it couldn’t possibly be bad. They have gay characters! Gay characters are good in everything!

Except that is the LAST reason you should include gay characters! Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE more LGBTQA+ representation in media. What I don’t love is obvious attempts to pander to audiences just to avoid criticisms. And keep in mind, this is NOT the first attempt a creator wanted to make Velma gay.

James Gunn wanted to make her gay in the live action movie, but WB said no.

Scooby-Doo: Mystery Incorporated (the GOAT of the Scooby-Doo franchise) wanted to make Velma gay, but could only imply it because Cartoon Network didn’t greenlit Steven Universe yet.

THOSE are genuine attempts to make Velma gay, to represent people because the creators of both products agreed that it was the least they could do.

But making Velma and Daphne a thing just to protect a show is nothing more than shallow and inconsiderate of the hard fight dozens of people put up with for the sake of representation.

And, honestly, I’d be a little more forgiving if the writing in Velma was good. But it’s not.

Within the first minute, this show features...

Cockroaches having sex...

And fifteen year olds taking a shower to make a joke about how over-sexualized a series’ pilot can be.

First of all: FUCK YOU FOR MAKING ME FIND THIS SCREEN SHOT FOR A POINT!

Second: You lose every ounce of credibility that you actually care about people when one of the first moves you make in your series is to sexualize minors for the sake of a joke.

A joke that doesn’t make sense at that. Point me to a series pilot that’s over-sexualized. If you get more than ten, I’ll say you have a point. I won’t say that sexualizing minors to make it was a good thing, but I’ll at least say that, “Yeah. You’re right. So many pilots do this. SO STOP DOING IT!”

That’s the level of writing Velma has. And it’s why they have their “representation” to protect themselves. Meanwhile, you want to know the level of writing you’ll find in The Owl House and Amphibia?

Villains who prove that the most dangerous people are the ones who make the rules.

Jokes that are actually funny.

Likable main protagonists who are kind and caring to the people around them.

Protagonists who have heartfelt relationships with other great characters, to the point that it breaks your heart to see them leave each other.

And on top of that, actually good representation. But here’s the thing: The representation isn’t only genuine. It’s a bonus. Something great to add onto everything else the writers and the creators do right.

What it isn’t is an attempt to protect a show from what it does wrong.

And that’s it. That’s the LAST time I’ll ever talk about Velma. I really mean it this time.

Talking about this show past it’s premier is already more attention it deserves. And if you were smart, you would not only stop watching, but stop talking. The best attention to give something you hate is NO attention.

If you really want to waste time, waste it by watching something good, like The Owl House and Amphibia. They may be kids shows, but they have more maturity than a single second of Velma.

[goosemixtapes]

max's top 10 books of 2024

past top tens in this tag! as always, these rankings are based on some unspecified combo of objective "goodness" and personal enjoyment. books beneath the cut :3

first off, as usual, our BOOKS I LOATHED category. shout-out to: i, claudius by robert graves (SHAME! SHAME! THE TV SHOW IS SO GOODBADCAMP!) and rhinoceros by eugene ionesco (very real argument about fascism; very fucking boring execution). shout-out also to king cheer and immortal longings, both of which were quite bad but which i wouldn't say i "loathed" so much as "they sent me into spirals of shakespearean madness."

my most anticipated 2025 release is the sea eternal by emery robin. also, alecto the ninth again

okay. the meat of the matter. i read SO many good books this year (and so much good short fiction), so lots of runners-up: brotherless night by v.v. ganeshanathan (absolutely gutting with some of the most gorgeous prose i've ever read), white pearl by anchuli felicia king (set in an asian beauty corporation rocked by scandal; filled the succession-shaped hole in my heart), fairview by jackie sibblies drury (this play is doing the coolest fucking things with fourth walls), luster by raven leilani (i adore the main character so much and she is NOT thriving), and the his dark materials series (i wish i had read these as kids, but i'm also glad i have miltonic context?). thank you to my professors for half of these

OKAY. THE LIST!

10. Dare Me by Megan Abbott

i expected a thriller about toxic friendships and evil cheerleaders; i was not expecting this to REWIRE ME. the DYNAMICS in this fucking book. the ugly violent homoerotics and the empty hunger of white suburbia. the tenderness of the grooming. the constant unspoken looming specter of lesbianism. the constant sense that the main characters are teetering on the edge of disaster. BETH CASSIDY YOU ARE ONE OF THE CHARACTERS OF ALL TIME YOU MAKE ME FEEL BONKERS BATSHIT CRAZY. i need to send everyone in this book the lesbian masterdoc goodbye

9. Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehesi Coates

okay i know everybody raves about ta-nehesi coates' writing so i wasn't exactly SURPRISED this was good. but i WAS still knocked off my feet by the beauty of this book. this is an extended letter to coates' son on the experience of being a black man in america, and every single page is glowing with heartbreak--for all the black people destroyed and endangered by white supremacist society--and love--for everyone who keeps living, for the world, and for coates' son. i wrote down sooooo many quotes that struck me in the chest

8. Go Tell It on the Mountain by James Baldwin

kind of no fucking idea what to say about this book because my sense memory of it is just a whirlwind of "ack augh ough." the way this book envelops you in the psychological and emotional tumult of fourteen-year-old john grimes is crazy and intense and then baldwin DOES IT AGAIN in a series of interludes from other characters. this is about one day in john's life and his experience in the church, but it's also about the exhilarating terror in/of religion and the pain of growing up and the agony of antiblackness and the quiet terror of realizing your parents are fallible and human. and also a little bit about being gay for your youth pastor. did people lose their fucking minds in 1953 when this book came out because i would've

7. Lost Places and Sooner or Later Everything Falls Into the Sea by Sarah Pinsker

favorite author i discovered this year is definitely sarah pinsker, whose short stories mostly have in common that they are strange and whimsical as hell and make me want to crawl into her brain. i can't decide between her two short story collections, so i'm putting them both on here because they were SO fucking fun to read. between the two, some of the short stories include: a horror story told through a folk music genius lyrics page! a robot arm that identified as a road! a kid yelling the lines in the 1920s movie theater! george gershwin! girl scouts! and my favorite, a batshit crazy agatha christie homage set at a convention of dozens of alternate-universe sarah pinsker selves! (which you can read online!)

6. Paradise Lost by Erin Shields

look. there are aspects of this play--a modern reworking of milton's epic poem, featuring hot middle-aged woman satan--that are too on-the-nose. but holy fucking shit, the irreversible things milf satan has done to my brainstem. maybe i'm just a fucking ex-catholic but some of the speeches in this play made me feel like i was being tumbled in a heavy-duty washing machine. also, fascinating things going on with script format here. i wrote an insane transgender satan monologue for my paradise lost class because of this play. (also shout-out shields' king lear adaptation/prequel, left off my list for space but it's REALLY fucking fantastic)

5. In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado

okay we all know in the dream house. but i'm here to sing its praises anyway, because reading it feels like walking into a woodchipper. this is a memoir about abuse and an experiment with form and a raw open organ placed directly in your hands. machado's prose is genuinely fucking crazy good; she has such a gift for scalpel-like precision in every sentence, and everything about this book is so carefully-crafted and feels like getting clocked in the teeth. there's a choose-your-own adventure section where the result is always the same. for personal reasons i read this at a weird time and it made me want to get on my knees on the carpet and hack like a sick cat

4. Nobody Knows My Name by James Baldwin

i read this essay collection two weeks into the year and i knew it was going to be one of the most stunning reading experiences of 2024. the first page knocked me flat on my ass and it never let up. he manages that thing so few authors can do, where his eloquent and precise prose is exactly as deft as his observations are perceptive and sharp. his work cuts straight to the truth of things. i finished this book grieving the fact that baldwin died before i was born--because he can't comment on current events? because i can't see him speak live? because i felt some kind of connection to him through the words despite knowing he was not writing for some random college kid in the backseat of a car? anyway i am a groupie now

3. Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

reading this and then in the dream house back to back was like self-trepanation. why did i do that. what in the name of god can i even say about this book. what IS there to say. all the best of fantasy and all the best of humanity are in here in under 300 pages and it made me cry and i have thought about it ceaselessly since and i can't say anything without spoiling the fun because you REALLY ought to go in blind. um. girls, do you like, um... the labyrinth?

2. Angels in America by Tony Kushner

ohhhhhhh my god. oh my fucking god. i mean it with my full chest when i say that this is thee defining dramatic work of modern america. play that is about jewishness and gayness and AIDS and love and sickness and the anxiety of modernity and getting boners and prophecies from reactionary angels. and roy cohn is there. this was written at the end of the 20th century and yet it still hits exactly as hard if not harder in 2024 ("in the twenty-first century we will all be insane" yeah for REAL). it's the play of all time. it's one of the most things ever written. i am going to think about it every day of my fucking life. truly impossible to overstate this one

1. The Stars Undying by Emery Robin

and yet AIA is still my #2, because my #1 is a book i think may have been written specifically for me. like, so much for me that i'm furious i didn't write it. that book being a space opera rendition of cleopatra's life story, featuring insane butch mark antony and bisexual love triangles and CICERO? CICERO IS THERE? this is a slowish character-driven story that wouldn't work if gracia's narration wasn't so stirring and self-aware, but it is, and she is, and she's fascinating and has everything wrong with her, and i am obsessed with the things this book is doing with history and legend and the reception of these figures and also ROMAN HISTORY JOKES IN SPACE!!! and i want anita decretan so bad it makes me look stupid. emery robin do you want my credit card information

if you've read this far, please pitch in with your own favorite reads of the year! what books are you excited for in 2025? :)

[yoinkschief]

I remember watching this one movie called Us by Jordan Peele

What if the eddsworld lads were dropped in this universe lol

It's actually so funny that you ask that cause I just finished watching that movie after my friends recommended it to me !!!

The easy answer would be haha Spares ! And they just kill them all ofc, but I think thinking about it in the setting of Us is the best way to go about this,,,

To me I immediately go to character 1-to-1s, like who would be which character in the movie, yk ?

I think Edd would be Adelaide, I mean cause duh main characters, but also they just,,,, I dunno something about them fits, I think it's cause to me they both have that same instinct of wanting to protect everyone themselves but also holding all responsibility on their shoulders and not letting anyone else feel that weight if that makes sense (This is just a personal HC for Edd, but I think Adelaide might genuinely feel this way, at least in some regard, seeing as she hadn't told Gabe about her fears with Santa Cruz's beach until the movie, which sure could be for plot reasons but I don't see why she wouldn't have told him way sooner since they've been to the beach house before if it wasn't because she was scared to let him hear that cause he'd think she's crazy, yk, keeping all the "burden" to herself)

I think Tom would be Gabe, because I mean fucking look at them, goofy ass dads the both of them I mean it's perfect it fits something something TomEdd propaganda

Matt would be Zora in an odd sense,, I dunno him and Tord's character placements are a little flimsy to be fair,,, honestly I have Tord as Jason cause he's a little shit who loves fire

Also I'm mostly doing this because I would LOVE to see Eduardo and Jon as Kitty and Josh,,, I think Kitty would be Eduardo and Josh would be Jon, and I know a lot of people aren't going to agree with that but I see it with the times Kitty turns to Adelaide and is just like "I think about killing him sometimes" like as a joke obviously cause haha ball and chain, but also mostly because of the scene where Kitty's on the balcony and telling Josh to go and look outside since she heard something

and there's another reason why but it's cruel and would have minor spoilers for the movie

As for who's Becca and Lindsey I don't care I hate them bitches Mark can be both he's blonde enough for it

BUTTT thinking about this in a more "The boys but their next shenanigan is Us" it changes a bit

(WARNING: SPOILERS BEYOND THIS)

Leaning more into that whole "haha, Spares!" moment but mostly just for Bing and Larry cause they totally fucking would be the type to create soulless copies like that I mean they already fucking did and I will never forgive them from throwing Scribble Tom in the reject room he deserves to be free

But also imo if we're going down this route I think it would be better to have Tord as Adelaide with the whole leaving and coming back bit he did, I think it would be a great way to incorporate the twist if ykwim I don't wanna outright spoil anything yk but I think that would be the extent of like the one-to-one comparisons with the main cast versus eddsworld casting since everyone else has pretty different personalities

But they wouldn't hesitate to not give a damn and just kill every doppelganger they came across, I think the neighbors would still get killed but they'd show up in the next eddisode like nothing happened, and I think Edd would know about the whole twist at the end,,, kinda like how some people speculate Jason does :ppp

[palmtreepalmtree]

Alright my friends - the twinkly lights are up, the house smells like pine, you've got every manner of red-green-and-gold wrapping paper shoved in a corner - without a doubt it's that time of year: Christmas. As you know, I've been disappointed to see so few entries into the Christmas rom-com genre this year from Netflix, so I've started to explore further afield to find something ripe for your enjoyment.

And now, I'm pleased to present...

The Worst Movies on HBO/MAX/Discovery+/HGTV??? (idefk), Right Now!

As it turns out sometime last year Discovery+ teamed up with MarVista to produce some Christmas romance content with random tie-ins to their FoodNetwork/HGTV network stars. This has created some really... oh, let's just call it interesting content.

I mean... you gotta know from the outset that there's no way these will be good. NO fucking WAY.

FIRST, as a whole, I don't think these movies know what their purpose is. Are they supposed to promote the reality shows of their cameo stars? Are they supposed to give their reality stars an opportunity to flex some acting muscle!? Are they supposed to be *GASP* good stories? NOBODY KNOWS!

SECOND, it's possible that the point of these movies is just to promote the reality show format as like... a concept. But the thing is -- NOT TO FORESHADOW OR ANYTHING -- that comes with some very weird baggage. LIKE SUPER WEIRD.

Let's break these down in round-up style.

The first movie that apparently created the mold* was Candy Coated Christmas (2021) - *pun intended. This vehicle cameos Ree Drummond, The Pioneer Woman, who gets about two minutes of screen time which apparently warrants her this kind of promotional one-sheet placement:

...like okay.

A shocking number of these stories involve people who are in financial peril. In this one, a hotel heiress finds herself on the brink of bankruptcy, and, on daddy's orders, she heads to a small town to evict the peppermint farmer tenants at her family's property who are, you guessed it, on the brink of bankruptcy.

In this movie, the spirit of Christmas (or spearmint gum in this case), is a plan to rescue these two financial catastrophes, oh, and they fall in love. Sure. Why not.

This movie is an empty candy-coated shell of a romance that I can best describe as serviceable. But apparently it was enough of a hit that the rest of the movies followed. So we can blame this candy cane for the Christmas rogering that followed in 2022.

Continuing from worst to most egregious...

A Gingerbread Christmas (2022) - This one cameos that Ace of Cakes dude (no idea his name and not interested in looking it up) who is judging a gingerbread competition that the main character desperately needs to win to save her dead mom's foundering bakery - YES another fucking business in peril.

Her love interest is the general contractor/baker/single dad who has taken up daily residence in the bakery where he is apparently simultaneously working on fixing the place up and also doing all of the baking........?

Yeah, it makes little sense, and yet somehow this is not the worst of the four entries this year.

Both of these actors are people you'll recognize and will have you thinking heyyyyy where is she/he from? (Let me help you out: The Good Place/Reacher). They're fine.

This is fine.

It's just... not going to leave you feeling much of anything. And that's the exact opposite of what these movies are supposed to do. You're not killing me, you're just boring me. There's nothing spicy in this gingerbread, baby! ZING! Nailed 'em.

There's a kind of nice subplot about a new immigrant entering the contest as well, but maybe I have a soft spot in my heart for that. This definitely does not seem like it's going for the same audience as some of the Hallmark movies, but it's also only gesturing at substantive things rather than really delivering anything of substance. Hey guys, did you know that immigrant Muslims can celebrate Christmas too!?

MOVING ON.....

One Delicious Christmas (2022) - Alright... where do I even start here??? Continuing on our theme of struggling businesses, this one slightly breaks the pattern by telling us a story of the owner of a boutique inn who needs to find a new chef for her family business so that she can bring on a financial partner to help ease the strain of her sole ownership.

The cameo in this one is Bobby Flay who comes in as a restaurant critic to comment on the food. Sigh. I know. Look I'm just reporting here, don't harm the messenger.

Alright there are three things here that just drove me completely batty: First, and I hate calling this shit out, but I gotta say the lead actress here has some partial vocal fry thing going on with her voice that is just impossible to watch for an hour and a half. I just wanted to shake her and be like BREATHE THROUGH YOUR CHEST. Fucking hell. It's a trial being me sometimes.

Second, obviously the theme here is cooking, but the whole story is based around the fact that the chef is doing new and risky recipes that the inn owner is nervous her people won't like... but like... the recipes are super basic? Like scalloped potatoes instead of mashed? Lobster bisque!? None of the new menu items read as dangerous or cutting edge -- especially if you watch the Food Network -- SO WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT1?!? Argh, okay.

Last, and this is just a weird thing that probably only I noticed, but like all these movies seemed to go out of their way to do mixed racial castings, which is a good thing, but then they also seem to have not made any adjustments for that in terms of story.

In this one, the love interest/chef is played by a Canadian actor of Filipino ancestry -- but his character name is Preston Weaver. Preston. PRESTON. PRESTON. There are also repeated references in the story to cooking for and with his grandmother, but no mention, not even one, that maybe her cooking wasn't American-style food? I mean, it is perfectly possible for a person to have their family immigrant story have happened so long ago, that even their grandparent doesn't make traditional foods from their country of ethnic origin, but it also seems WEIRD. Like some sort of weird white washing??? idk. Jury is still out on this I guess. I just don't think it would have killed them to reference one Filipino recipe or technique, especially since that's a pretty rich food culture. You know, as compared with making a main plot point that the fucking LOBSTER BISQUE keeps selling out.

(Is there a whiter word than bisque? I don't fucking think so).

I HAVE GONE ON TOO LONG. THE NEXT ONE.

Designing Christmas (2022) - Alright, I'm running out of steam and so I'm gonna make this one quick. This one cameos that dark haired lady from Love it or List it not sure her name not looking it up (Hilary???). This one is about a couple who work as a designer/contractor pair on a reality show and in order to save their failing show they decide their last show of the season will be a restoration of her family's old home that she just purchased and SURPRISE TO NO ONE WHO WATCHES THESE SHOWS there's a crack in the foundation blahblahblah WHO CARES!?

NO ONE.

This one really suffers from the fact that the male lead is just boring.

Honestly, that's a theme throughout these movies. The male leads are super weak and boring. Tepid. Just absolutely forgettable characters played by actors who are deciding whether the fuck to fire their agents.

What's weird about this one is the way that the production really styles it after a reality show -- even including those restoration classic before and after reveals. But that is nothing on the last one......

A Christmas Open House (2022) -- Alright the cameos in this one are that Hometown Whatever couple who have been "restoring" houses in their hometown in someplace in the south and by restoring, I mean flipping but under the guise of home restoration.

ANYHOW - the plot is that this big city house stager teams up with a realtor to sell her family home to make sure her mom gets the best purchase price on the sale. It's just like those old Christmas classics that really capture the Christmas spirit - A Christmas Carol, Miracle on 34th Street, It's a Wonderful Life. You know. Really in that anti-capitalist vein.

Deeeeeeeep sigh.

So... I don't even know how to say this. But this movie involves a Christmas miracle.

See, it turns out the house stager accidentally gave the furniture company the wrong credit card number, so the day before the showing ON CHRISTMAS the furniture people came and took back all of the perfectly staged furniture and GASP knocked down the (fake) Christmas tree! WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO1?!? HOW ARE THEY EVER GONNA SELL THE HOUSE ON CHRISTMAS NOW!?$!

BUT IT'S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE

The whole town shows up to bring them furniture that they can use to stage the house before the potential buyers arrive. Like... they show up with their odds and ends so that the house can be staged. SO THAT THE HOUSE CAN BE STAGED FOR SALE. Are... are you guys with me here? The miracle that the whole town rallied behind was bringing FURNITURE to STAGE A HOUSE. FOR SALE.

I just... I am walking away.

We are so fucking far from Dickens here we might as well be in a new fucking holiday.

And we are.

Because that's the whole point of all of these movies.

It's not Christmas.

It's American Christmas.

For all the shit that the nostalgic, small-town worshipping Christmas movies get this time of year, I'm gonna go out on a limb and say these movies are more insidious. Instead of blatantly trying to valorize the small town spirit, the support of family and friends, and getting back to your roots, these movies are like the Scooby Doo villain of Christmas movies. Rip off the mask at the end for the big reveal:

IT WAS CAPITALISM ALL ALONG!?!?

Anyhow, I don't know who was supposed to read these scripts before they became movies, but everyone involved will probably be laughing all the way to the bank.

Don't watch these. They're not funny enough to be worth the soul-gutting feeling of realizing what these movies are for.

Nothing.

Empty.

Spiritless.

Candy-coated capitalism.

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

My Sydcarmy dream happy ending? Or Storer's?

This is the 1st time I actually envisioned a whole scene with music and all in my head. I always had the feeling that the end of the show is gonna be like the final scene of Braciole: All together, the found family, maybe at the restaurant, maybe not, and just having dinner and having a good time.

After that "vision" I had, I found out that Storer mentioned in a panel that food had always saved them as a family, he was talking about his own family. So I figured: OK so since the show he created, the whole Bear universe, revolves around food, that's gonna be the ending. I felt he kinda confirmed my "vision", my take, the one I had as soon as I finished watching S1. I could already see that ending and believe in it wholeheartedly. And it looked like that, but blurry, because it was just season 1, and even though I knew there was a S2 that I hadn't watched yet (watched it the next day, actually), the overthinker in me was already daydreaming about THE SHOW'S FINALE.

OK, cut to me obsessing about this show after watching S2, that IMO was even better than S1, which is VERY RARE nowadays on TV, and then me re-watching both seasons and dissecting them till the cows go home and then re-watching S2 only over and over to analyze every single layer of Sydcarmy as humanly possible, and literally cutting my working hours to have more time to do that LMAO! etc. So, I ended up noticing the whole script structure Storer (and Calo) came up with, it's Austenian. And at that point, I was already a Sydcarmy soldier, of course, but when I picked up on the Austenticity of it all I FUCKING FLIPPED OUT because that gave me hope. It meant that the Sydcarmy endgame I had in mind could very well happen seeing as it was IC and Austenian, and it fit the slow burn process I had already picked up on right after watching Braciole, as I mentioned HERE. It all made total sense. How will it happen exactly, IDK, I wish I did but Storer is diabolical and way better than me at plot twists, so I won't even try to guess, but I will put my trust in the Austenian arc he swears by.

Me growing up reading Austen (real footage):

For those who haven't read Jane Austen, her trademark is: taking something painful and making it beautiful, finding beauty in pain, and always building towards a happy ending and redemption arc for her main characters, unless she kills them first and if she does, we can be sure that death will serve the happy ending purpose anyway (AKA: Michael, Syd's mother and probably Cicero, I wanna believe Donna will live, but I'm on the fence about her, I do believe she will be redeemed after Nat's baby is born, either way), she will take that death and make it worthwhile and beautiful. She doesn't stand for unhappy endings, but she does include bittersweetness in the endgame of some of her characters, usually not the A ones, but the B ones. The Alphas usually get a relatively "clean happy ending". Relatively being the operative word and what we can ALWAYS expect no matter what, is a "teaching", a lesson learned by the main characters. They walk out of that story as new men/women after having learned that/those lesson/s. She does this. She slow burns romances left and right, kills characters off, takes losses and turns them into gains, and builds towards a happy ending. That's an Austenian structure right there. It's usually used in Romance movies, rarely seen on this kinda TV shows, but here we are. The Storer-Calo duo are giving us Austenian characters in a nutshell.

So, back to my point, I always had this take and wishful thinking even, but up until now, I was never able to actually envision a final scene that could be actually canonical. I mean, I could even fucking write the whole script of that whole final ep, line by line, for every character if they allowed me to. I have the music in mind, the outfits, the whole set, and the final take that faiths to black and reads THE END. And no, this is not just a wishful thinking list or prediction post, it's an actual argumentative outline about why I think The Bear’s series finale will look like the Happy version of Fishes:

And just because Carmy said this, I will take a wild guess, this is gonna be part of the menu:

He associated them with his, and I quote: "fucked up family life" end of quote. So he wanted to reversion them:

And Marcus, based on Sydcarmy's pointers, came up with The Michael Cannoli:

I am also assuming, Sydcarmy will be endgame because of the aforementioned reasons, but I'm not sure Storer will actually show it on camera, maybe just insinuate it, because we all know he is diabolical and also because that's how the original movie script turned into TV script ended before Storer knew The Bear was going to be picked up for a 2° season, he always had this ending in mind for The Bear, behold:

So what I'm saying is: We Sydcarmy truthers have an actual shot here. I also dive into this theory HERE but from a totally different angle.

This happy Sydcarmy endgame we want is at arms' reach.

Now I see it more clearly.

Who's with me?

@ciaonicole85 thanks for the inspo to write this post, it all came to mind when I saw yours.

[vasito-de-leche]

i just realized something from each arcanist's voiceline, im not sure if u are ahead of me in this but anyways...

...their "monologue" segments, each of their monologue segments their most vulnerable they have ever been or the deepest they have ever opened up, at least for the ones that I have read.

for example:

- pavia admitting that every night it feels like he's still in piedmonte (by extension, that boarded up basement)

- blonney thinking why it's impossible for humans and arcanists to get along when they have similar interests like movies

- mesmer jr. screaming to stop being insane and leave her alone (poor girl is traumatized and a big F you to constantine and her family for being persistent in putting her in those situations)

- sotheby in yet another scene about how little she knows about distinguishing human things and arcane things (which is a problem for a young arcanist like her should she be unintentionally blatant about it)

- horropedia being glad that he is still himself despite the foundation's attempt to fit him in a mold

all in all, "monologue" segments are actually sad bits about our faves

A good chunk of the monologues are tragic, yeah - but I think that it's because we have the benefit of the full picture and we each have our own interpretations!

I just don't like to think of monologues as just exclusively sad bits for characters to show how sad they are or used to be in their lives? It takes away the nuance of how the character speaks about these things, if that makes sense!

I'll put the rest of my thoughts and ramblings under the cut so I don't keep clogging the main tag with nonsense <3

For example, Pavia's monologue - a popular interpretation of his character is that he's still traumatized by his past and the time he spent in the basement, therefore his monologue implies that no matter where he goes, he's still alone in that dark basement. From my personal reading on it, Pavia is a character who reclaimed the things that hurt him (the darkness, the isolation) and are now part of him (his wolves and shadow arcanum, his independence).

So to me, that monologue is a threat. I already explained this in detail in my first Pavia posts, so I'll spare y'all from the repetition lolol

Sotheby's monologue - you say that her lack of knowledge when it comes to differentiate human things from arcanist things is a problem. To me, this quote is just a highlight of her curiosity and her sheltered life, because she sounds chipper at the idea of learning new things. And I think it's a monologue meant to focus on her curiosity, because her Insight II is "World on the Other Side" which shows Sotheby inside a glass cage, looking outside to the real world.

The outside world is different from what I imagined. There are more arcane animals than I thought ... Humans are also more interesting!

And one can still continue to look deeper into this monologue and relate it to the full context of her situation to have a different reading!

Maybe someone else thinks this quote is extremely fucking tragic, because we're talking about a rich, privileged and sheltered girl who relied heavily on her caretaker, Mr. Karson, and now that he's gone, she's left to explore the world all on her own! Maybe it's a really lovely and happy quote, because it shows Sotheby's growth, still excited to learn about the outside world! Maybe it's all at once!

And Blonney's monologue, to me that's not a tragic voiceline at all but a rather hopeful moment for Blonney, a moment of thoughtful consideration which contrasts the "Blonde Bimbo" stereotype she's been cast in and shows how observant and attentive to detail she can be.

Is it true that humans and arcanists cannot live in harmony? We have so many things in common to share and enjoy, like the movies. As I learned about humans from the movies, so can humans learn about arcanists ... It's just that no one has made such a movie yet.

From my reading on this monologue, Blonney very clearly believes it's possible for humans and arcanists to live in harmony - it only takes for both sides to consider each other's perspectives. She's lived among humans, she's learned about humans through their movies. But she's ignorant about arcanists because of the way she was raised, because of the lack of exposure she's had to arcanists and their world.

No one has made such a movie, but maybe her, an arcanists that's experienced the duality of everything, a bimbo who is majoring in film, a major that everyone insists is wrong for her because it doesn't fit her image - maybe she can make such movie.

Yes, it's a sad monologue because of the context of subtle oppression towards arcanists, because of what we know about Blonney's life and all. But to me, it doesn't end on a sad note. Especially with how driven and outspoken Blonney is.

It's the same for Horropedia's monologue for me - yes, he's serious when talking about the way the Foundation and the way they continue to cut away all the unwanted parts of the arcanists they take in, but it also ends on a nice note. He's relieved to have survived being true to himself, he's relieved Vertin was able to do the same.

And then there's Mesmer Jr.'s monologue - this one is, without a doubt, an awful moment for her. Given what we know about her background and family, from either the main story or the Three Doors update, we can safely assume this is her having a panic attack of sorts, steming from her trauma and long-term internalized hatred/fear/disgust towards arcanists.

This is the most objectively sad and tragic monologue out of these. But what of the reading?

Is this Mesmer Jr. being comfortable enough around Vertin to let her see such a violent and vulnerable moment? Someone could easily read this as Mesmer Jr. and Vertin's relationship being repaired slowly to allow such display of vulnerability, the same way someone could easily read this as Vertin just stumbling upon Mesmer Jr. having the worst time of her life. Someone might also interpret this as Vertin doing something that caused Mesmer Jr. to react like this!

A few other examples I have at the top of my head that can differ greatly depending on the way you choose to read it...

Bette's monologue, for example!

 I've dreamt forever about my first character, not as a rich young man, a courageous adventurer, a fair or rich lady, but the first character starred by me, Bette with brown hair! I have noted them all in this notebook, which is called "My Script."

Is this voiceline sad? It can be, if you choose to intepret it as Bette's inability to get a starring role, while all of her dreams of being the protagonist are kept in a notebook that no one else will read or notice. It can also be inspiring, if you choose to interpret it as Bette holding on to the belief that she herself - not a character that she plays, but herself as a person - is important, even if no one else notices. Again, it can be this and that or both or none or all at once!

Or Baby Blue's monologue!

People at school once called me... Umm, how do you say that word? Ah... Crazy! Sad? I'm not sad... They told me that the most outstanding people were all crazy...

Yes, this can be sad, because we're talking about a 17 year old girl who was so disillusioned with her real life that she feels more comfortable in a world of illusion, while her real body remains comatose. And yes, this can be happy, because we're talking about a 17 year old girl who found a place that she truly feels alive in, where she finally has peope who understand and care for her.

I think I might've lost the point of the post somewhere through the rambling - but yeah! I don't like to think of these voicelines as just sad bits, especially with how much detail and attention the writing of R1999 has, all the love they put into all characters <3

[hello-nichya-here]

https://www.tumblr.com/mostly-mundane-atla/710894569738387456/this-sounds-pretty-accurate-but-there-is-another what do u think ??

Okay, here are the bits I agree with:

1 - Some Azula fans are trying way too damn hard to make her a "Girlboss" that never did anything wrong. This is legitimatelly something I have seen happen A LOT lately and it gets on my nerves SO BAD.

2 - Some Azula fans focus a just a little bit too much on the sad aspects of her character/story, mainly her loneliness and how she felt nobody loved her (Note: I'm being generous here because most of the time people bring that to remind me people that, no, just because she was the favorite child of an ABUSIVE parent it doesn't mean that her life was easy, but I HAVE seen the "character sad, therefore character good" a few times).

The stuff that I don't agree with it AT ALL:

1 - "Cersei Lannister is a character that is like Azula." No. Just no. I know the fandom likes to joke about some simmilarities between both shows or borrow elements from that story to our fanfics, but Avatar is not Game Of Thrones, and Azula is not Cersei. Their personalities are not that simmilar, nor their family situations. Cersei is far more reckless, blood thirsty, downright vile ADULT WOMAN, she never got a single shred of respect from her father or ANYONE, and her main way of manipulating people is to go the Femme Fatale route and seduce them. Not at all like the pragmatic (but not sadistic), prodigious, awkward princess that can't flirt to save her life and that everyone respects/fears. Even the whole "When you play the Game Of Thrones, you win or you die" doesn't really apply because Cersei sacrificed nearly everything to remain the queen, while Azula literally brought Zuko back home, making him the heir to the throne again. They. Are. Not. The. Same. (I won't get into the other characters mentioned because I don't know who they are)

2 - "Azula isn't that well written" Unless we're considering the comics, in which EVERYONE was poorly written, I'm gonna die on the hill that this is just wrong. Azula was not redeemed, yes, and Bryke seems to not understand her, but the way her story and arc went in the show makes perfect logical sense to me - I just don't think that's where or how it should end. We can argue over whether her story is finished, not on if she's well-written character and a deliberately sympathetic villain that was also REALLY good at being a villain.

3 - "Azula doesn't have a lot going on" Bullshit. Regardless of redemption or not, Azula IS a complex character - yes, even if she is the villain of a Nickelodeon cartoon (WEIRD argument to claim she can't be that deep - this is literally a show about war, genocide and abusive families, which is why it stood out to people because NOBODY expected Nick to go there). We literally see her having a mental breakdown after years of abuse, indoctrination and VERY bad decisions that ruined every relationship she had finally caught up with her. I consider this a lot, just like I consider things like waking up one day and finding out EVERYONE you knew and loved has been gone for a hundred years or dealing with the fact your father is an abusive piece of shit that is totally okay with disfiguring and banishing you because you dared to speak out of turn. For fuck's sake, the existence of The Beach as an episode proves this claim wrong because the whole point of that episode is "These villainous Fire Nation teens have some hidden depths."

4 - "There are better stories with better/more complex characters" Again, weird argument. I think Beauty And The Beast is the best Disney movie and that Mulan is the best disney princess, but I still adore Snow White despite her story being VERY simple. And even though I like these stories that all have endings, I like the dark fantasy and heavy on politics story of Game Of Thrones - and even though I think the books are better, I still like the first half of the show despite the changes made to the story. This is not a "Either this or that" situation. You can think something isn't perfect or deep and STILL like it.

5 - "She's not a real person, she's a character on a show therefore her not needing to 'deserve' redemption is irrevelant because what matters is what benefits the story and Azula's redemption wouldn't do that" Really? You're pulling that shit? In a show like ATLA? The show that said "Everyone is capable of great good and great evil"? The show that repeatedly says "Friendship and kindness are going to save the day?"? The show that had one of the bad guys redeem himself by befriending the good guys and visiting his abusive father in jail and saying "Maybe this will make you have a change of heart?" THIS show would not benefit or stay consistent to it's themes if the villain that desperately craves love and validation learned that the way she tried to get these things was wrong and started being a better person who'd eventually be healthy, loved and accepted? Give me a break.

[brunossan]

HOW TO NOT WRITE VILLAINS: THE SITH RESURGENCE EDITION

Note: The Post about The Fic resume is still on the oven. This is an extra about a thing i need to complain about on this damned fanfic.

Kylo Ren in this fanfic is more of a punching bag than a proper villain.

But lets start with a point.

A thing everyone who knows Lily Orchard knows is that she hates a certain group of characters. These characters are what she calls "The White favourites of fandom", and they all fall in the same archetype according to her:

1: They are male.

2: They happen to be White most of the time.

3: They usually start as villains or antagonists but get their redemptions at some point or are so loved by The fandom they are used in other media like references or even full participations that makes People change their vision on them.

Her list include characters like Hunter (The Owl House), N (Pokemon), Arthas (World of Warcraft), Silver (Pokémon), Laios (Dungeon Meshi) and a bunch of others, but there is one in the list that gets the crown of most hated one.

Kylo Ren.

Lily hates him A LOT. Like, when i say a lot, i mean that almost ALL HER VÍDEOS INCLUDE HIM AT SOME POINT. IN HER POKEMON REVIEW SHE NAMED SILVER KYLE RON JUST TO "Beat him without remorse", AND EVEN IN HER STAR WARS FANFIC HE IS THE WORST VERSION OF HIM.

Now, lets take one thing clear. Kylo ren is a trash character? Yes he is. He had a cool concept but got a bad execution, thats why in some fanfics People try to make him either a better villain or redeem him. However, in Lily's case, she made sure he is a pathetic punching bag for her main characters.

This is now a resume on how Kylo goes in this history and how to NOT write a villain.

1-Not a Real Threat

A thing Lily claims to love are "Low stakes histories", wich are normally histories focused on small things like personal problems. However, The Sith Resurgence is on the problem lots of histories fall that its called

The villain is not a real threat.

And still, Lily tries to sell the ideia on Kylo being a threat. Like, lets jump to chapter 2 of the fic.

The chapter introduces Kylo Ren as an explosive person, but while in the movies we see his first introduction as being more threatening and serious but with anger issues that make him a bad Darksider, in this fic he is literally a manchild with a Lightsaber. All his flaws are upped to 100%.

In fact, in chapter 2 he senses Aliana's presence and after she denies coming with him, they fight. However, Kylo gets stomped by Aliana and is forced to run back to his ship by her. After that, it becomes a snowball, because every single fight, argue or even a moment in the fic he SHOULD show his strenght...

It fucking falls on ground.

Not only he is extremely weak, Lily sells the ideia that he is actually extremely powerful but had a bad teacher and was a bad student.

A bad student i can excuse but luke a BAD TEACHER?

Go fuck yourself, Lily.

Anyways, right after this loss, Kylo Ren starts getting more and more disrespect, even from his own allies. He is bullied, disrespected and even threatened by his own companions. This makes him wanting more and more to defeat both Aliana and Rey so he could get his respect and pride back.

But

Every

SINGLE

TIME

HE GETS HIS ASS FOLDED BY THEM BOTH. ALL HIS FIGHTS, ALL THE MOMENTS HE COULD BE SELLED AS THE BIG BAD OF THIS FIC, THROWN IN THE GROUND FOR NOTHING EXCEPT MAKING HIM THE PUNCHING BAG OF THE MAIN CHARACTER AND HER WIFE!

Kylo Ren in this fic is not a real threat to any of them. He is just the punching bag. Why?

Because Lily hate him.

2-The Hate blinds a writer, so a cat on a blender.

Its not uncommon doing histories out of spite of things you dislike. But in case of lily, at least 90% of her histories (Iris and Kiera not included) are made because she spites things of a certain média. Pokemadhouse has lots of moments where Lily calls out things of pokemon world, like Pokeballs being the tools to enslave pokemon, and her Warcraft fantiction used to tackle a lot of both Blizzard and Wow mistakes. However, most of the problems came from The fandom itself.

And one the only things i can agree with her is that shippers can ruin a media or the reputation of it.

Yes.

Im talking about Reylo.

You see, Lily absolutely despises Disney Canon, the Star Wars fandom in General and Reylos. But her hatred moved her on this fic decisions, like the Curse on the Beniko Clan and the hatred the Force have for them. She claimed in one post from her now-deleted old account that she took inspiration on them for it, on People who dislike her fic, her vision on Sith not being evil or her critics about how star wars is handled by media. Wanna know the worst part about the Force hate in this fic?

In this fic, The Force is Reylo. Not exactly reylo, but you remember the Force Bond thing in The Last Jedi, where Rey and Kylo share minds and start talking with eachother then Snoke reveals that it was him who bonded them?

Well, it all falls to the ground because of this scene (TW: SA Mention below)

Where Lily compared the Mind Probe, a Dark Side Force technique to read minds.

To R4pe.

Yes. Mind reading counts as S3xu4l 4ssault somehow, and this is a Cat in a Blender situation on the fic.

Cat in a Blender is a term that is used to reference moments where the writers make certain characters do horrible things to excuse the main characters actions. In this fic, Kylo Ren actions are considered the worst of crimes, even when Aliana actions are literally pure evil most of time. She kills, and threatens and even uses mind tricks to get rid of all enemies in her way, and yet the punching bag of the fic is accused on SA just to excuse the "Punishment" he receives. The hate of this character is so big that his suffering extends for 46 of the 48 chapters of this fic. And not only that but ends with not only he losing again but in such painful and destructive way that makes it feel pointless.

The ideia of a villain being ruined because of the writer hating on the character is a reason why i took almost 2 months to finish this history. Because at some points, it was just Cat in a Blender situations all over again. And other points were just Lily using her fic to directly attack star wars and its fans over and over again. Hate can really blind a writer from its own mistakes.

3-The Hatred 4 years after the fic ended still remains.

We all need to grow up at some point, even if we keep disliking one thing. But the thing that lily cant stop doing is remembering People she hates certain characters and considers their existence like the coming of the anti-christ. Kylo Ren hate stopped being cool after the Rise of Skywalker, People moved on of it. But all the time she must remember People on her vídeos that Kylo Ren sucked, that his fans are thrash, that Reylos are thrash...

Girl, move on. Its a bad character and you made the character a punching bag for being bullied and tortured the entire fanfic where the Mary sues could do everything and him nothing. We get it.

But still, its been years the fic ended. Move on. You remember the warcraft reference you made on this scene.

"Its all NOTHING!"

[peach-fiz]

I actually didn't even bother watching the second season of Loki because of the cheap marketing and inconsistent storytelling.

It just felt like the plot was lifted off somewhere it would have made sense, and a character with a similar ego was replaced with Loki and goes through an arc that might have made sense for a blank slate character, but not someone who already has a backstory.

Loki doesn't even feel like Loki after three episodes in S1. The whole point of having a show like that just seems to be about the TVA and Sylvie.

Also the whole genderfluid thing. They 'confirmed' it in the promo and had a line in the script that went completely against anything they just said.

I knew at once that the writers, directors and other parts of production were really just pulling it in different directions and it would probably sound like a jazz trumpeter and a metal guitarist trying to improvise after knowing each other for 15 minutes.

I've been meaning to watch it just so I can have educated opinions on all of it but it's just,, so hard to get into. I definitely agree the marketing was cheap, they did with the 80s McDonald's like they did DB Cooper!Loki and made it centric to the advertising because McDonalds was also getting something out of it which is kinda ass seeing as realistically Loki Laufeyson would burn 6 of them down before he ate in one 😭

I personally don't like either of the major ships in the show but the forced Sylki shit in season 1 really got to me. Like not only did she completely replace him as the main character in HIS show, she's also a variant of him who he wants to make out with and overall it just reads as lazy writing and it's extremely disappointing that Mike Waldron has been put in charge of Multiverse of Madness and The Kang Dynasty since, due to the popularity of the Loki TV show. I was talking to my boyfriend about this last night but it kinda reminds me of the complaints people had ab the last Indiana Jones movie but opposite? Like everyone complained his best friend's daughter was gonna replace him bc she's a Mary Sue and she rlly isnt, she's more reminiscent of Marion in Raiders of the Lost Ark she just doesn't wanna fuck him. But the difference is Indy is a character who's majorly blank for little boys to project themselves onto. Which is great!! It works for those kind of movies, but they're not character development centric like the individual mcu movies tend to be. Loki is characterized in a way that he's drowning in identity issues and family problems and he experiences growth in every installment whether it be positive or negative. It doesn't make sense to take the formula of an Indidna Jones movie where he meets up with a woman who's typically a love interest and has her own issues that are only slightly touched on because that's not the focus, and they go do the plot.

Sylvie is not an Indy Girl, they straight up are trying to replace Loki with Sylvie. And you can tell the character wasn't supposed to have as much importance as she does in the show bc the character was worked on more after the actress they chose was buddies with a producer ( and this is no hate to the actress I'm sure she's delightful everything I've seen her in in terms of interviews has been lovely ).

I also absolutely agree they should've just made a tva mini series to introduce the tva rather than bringing back a dead character who soon will not make much sense anyway because Tom Hiddleston is getting older (and also he deserves to branch out in his career).

The genderfluid thing was a cash grab and it sucks ass, they just want money for acknowledging things already canon in the comics, same with confirming him as bisexual.

My boyfriend is actually writing a fic on ao3 called Find Me that's rlly good if you want Loki content that isn't related to the show.

(YES this is shameless promotion sshhhhshshsh) but fr the loki TV show makes me more confident in my screenwriting bc t h a t got put on disney plus. I'm also working on a Loki show rewrite in my spare time!!

[wisecrackingeric-2]

Death Island Spoiler-Free Thoughts post!!!

I JUST finished seeing DI last night (In Aotearoa) and oh my GOD???????? It was S O G O O D????????? It ABSOLUTELY lived up to my expectations!!!!!!!! I’m gonna do a spoiler-free thoughts post first and then I’ll post my spoilers post!!!!!! And if anybody wants any clips of the movie I managed to sneak in, please just ask!!

Ok first off,,, holy FUCK that beginning was S O tense. My friend and I were gripping our seats the entire time and it takes place during a pretty important moment in RE history and I think people are gonna LOVE it

And the villains motivations????? His backstory???????? LITERALLY HEARTBREAKING. It’s ACTUALLY GENUIENLY COMPELLING AND INTERESTING. His backstory is all laid out in that beginning scene and dear GOD it’s SO SAD. I’m trying to keep it Spoiler-Free obviously but I will D I E on the hill that him and his “best friend” were actually gay lovers. You CANNOT convince me otherwise

He was also just genuinely pretty frightening of a villain. He has this one repeated ‘motion’ he does throughout the movie that really makes you tense up, and there’s this one scene with a doctor character that had my friend and I on the edge of our seats

Again, his motivations were actually interesting and made sense!!!!!! And him calling out the main gangs respective organisations (BSAA, DSO, Government, Terrasave, etc etc) for being hypocrites was actually a compelling argument!!!!!!!!! It actually made the characters think!!

I’m trying to word this as best as I can without giving any of the plot away, and @highball66 has talked about this in their posts too, but throughout the movie the main gang are called ‘Pawns’ or ‘The Governments Weapons’ repeatedly quite a lot, and it makes me wonder if that’s gonna come up as an important plot point in a future game or something???? It’s very interesting to think about coupled with the implications of their respective organisations being hypocrites

You’ll all be delighted to know there is SO MUCH shipping content in this movie my GOD. S O many good Chreon moments. So many good Valenfield (for both siblings) and Chamberfield moments (in fact, every scene Rebecca’s in, Claire’s in there too :)) Shippers will have a BLAST

Just as expected, Jill and Leon are the PERFECT duo. They’re SUCH GOOD BESTIES, they work off of each other repeatedly SO WELL. They’re constantly giving each other silly goofy one-liners and saying something sarcastic to make the other one laugh, it’s great

Also, I don’t think Leon has a single serious line in this movie HXNSHDNDHXN everytime he’s on screen he’s ALWAYS saying something goofy or silly or making a pun. It’s GREAT

Also, the characters traumas actually get explored in an interesting and compelling way!!!!!!!! ESPECIALLY Jills!!!! Which makes sense cuz the movies about her, but they all get their moments to talk about how X event effected them etc etc, unfortunately none of it really gets resolved but I’m assuming they’re saving that for a future game

Jill’s kinda does???? She has a Good-For-Her moment with the villain which is fantastic and her and Chris have a good heart to heart at the end

Also, Chris Redfield fans are gonna be delighted with his character exploration in this movie

LOTS of references to Re2 & 3. In fact a BIG plot point/ motivator of the movie all stems from RE2, so Raccoon City fans are gonna have a blast!!!!!

Also, HEAPS of old characters are either mentioned or do actually show up!!!!! Nobody that I think anyone would be screaming to be excited about, but still!!

Unfortunately, Rebecca does get the exact same treatment as she did in Vendetta, but like, in the opposite direction…… she dissapeares for basically the entire movie and randomly shows up to save the day. I can’t complain though cuz seeing her work together with everyone else was FANTASTIC

This truly did feel like the avengers endgame of the RE movies, but there were also PLENTY of hints and open ends to a sequel

Finally, this truly was JILLS movie. When I was told that Jill was gonna be the main character I wasn’t really convinced, but M A N she truly SLAYS in this film. She IS THE MOMENT. This is HER movie and it shows

Aside from Leon’s random goofy one liners, I think my favourite part of this movie was the villain. I WISH I could just spoil his motivations in this post because for resident evil standards they’re SO INTERESTING and AGAIN, his thoughts on the main gangs respective organisations leave a lot to think about when it comes to future instalments!!!!!

10/10 movie, would 10000000% recommend. Truly lives up to my standards. My only negative is that Rebecca was hardly in it for the middle half but that’s it. SO glad we FINALLY got to see everyone working together (Capcom, PLEASE put your characters together like this again!!!!!!)

Forgot to add this, but Jill is cannonically a Jurassic Park fan. In fact, the entire last half of the movie is just a giant Jurassic Park reference

And I can’t PROVE this, but,,,,,, I’m 90% sure there was a Mr Beast reference. You’ll know it when you see it

[randomshyperson]

So I finally watched The Marvels.

~SPOILERS AHEAD~

They missed the opportunity to actually say Wanda's name but it's totally fine 'cause this is not about her, but also, excuse me Miss Rambeau??? Monica is that powerful now and all because she visited Wanda's little Sims city a couple of times, like what? I love it. That old theory that Wanda was the one who gave Pietro's power is coming back stronger now

I strongly believe misogyny and racism are behind the flop of this movie, I had an amazing time watching it, whole thing was genuinely funny with relevant marvel lore and characters plots (the aliens are still fighting each other and blaming humans, but hey, colonialism and exploit of resources are the main reason we have to protect planets). Everyone loves when Peter Quill explores the galaxy but if three women do the same it's suddenly a problem.

A lot of people saying how tired they are of Marvel, were only tired of women doing the Marvel formula, don't believe those haters. Just like every other Marvel project, we have the hero journey and their blockbusters cliches, a lot of visual effects and jokes, LIKE EVERY OTHER MARVEL PROJECT, but sure, let's blame the girls for the failure. To me, it was really refreshing just to see women having fun and supporting each other and throwing little energy balls every now and then.

Also, the fact that Princess Carol is a fucking Star now? Pretty sure that got her killed in the What if series but good to know she's more powerful than that.

Kamala is the star of this movie, she's so funny and charming but also Monica and Carol angst got me crying and it was not enough!! I need more of their pain

I almost forgot, Miss Carol Danvers is all by herself in space just using a god damn TORTURE DEVICE to try to get her memories back, EXCUSE ME??? Someone gives this woman a hug, or idk, sent her to therapy with Bucky cause jesus Christ that's not healthy lady.

For the things I didn't like, the rhythm for sure. Such a quick movie, a lot of things happening, one minute I was crying the next I was giggling then crying again and then thinking about politics like slow down a little. I wanna digest the dialogues for a second.

THE SINGING PLANET I CANNOT-

Really funny movie, kamala's parents, the cats, everything was so easy going and cheerful even with the little angst moments, I had such a good time.

The best thing about this movie, as fanfic writer who gets truly frustrated with plot holes and stuff like that, it's that I will be able to watch it again. Movies from the first phases I used to love before I start writing, I can no longer enjoy the same 'cause I keep seeing how they don't make a fucking sense or have unbearable characters storylines and personality changes (yes I'm talking about Civil War and Age of Ultron or Ultimate, maybe STEVE ROGERS LEAVING BUCKY in a specific matter). This and also the fact they lack all kinds of minorities. Doctor Strange had like 2 women in the cast?? And don't even get me started on talking about what the sequel did to Wanda's character development.

The Marvels, Ragnarok, Black Widow, Captain Marvel, Captain America (1&2), Infinity War and Guardians of The Galaxy (all three), Black Panther (both), Ten Rings, Eternals, are still the only Marvel movies I actually enjoy rewatching, because they are projects that respect the characters established personalities and history and for origins ones like Eternals or Ten Rings, they are simply fun, what a crime for a movie to be just fun huh

All of the shows are worth rewatching (even Fury's one that I hated it), 'cause they were given time to develop into stuff and as a writer there's a lot for us to work it.

Btw, I'm not talking about Kate Bishop'cause I'm simply unable to process my happiness over seeing her again. I do think I might have a stroke once Yelena is back.

[professional-bulshitter]

palm springs starring Andy Samberg and Cristin milioti is such a great movie example of,

she's everything. he's just Ken.

and, and hits just the right spot between barbie (the movie by Greta gerwig) and Good Omens (the queer angel demon book turned show) (if this doesn't makes sense rn gimne a min I'll explain,,,

so this man (Nyles) has been stuck in a time loop for the longest time ever and he just takes it yk? like he's having a shitty ass life rn,, he makes a friend who wants to kill him, his gf is cheating on him, he's stuck on the day of the marriage of two people he doesn't particularly care or like and he's just having a bad time overall yk?? so he's just accepting of his fate and is just accepting of the sheer hopelessness of life and meaninglessness of his every action

and then, and then, comes our main female protagonist (Sarah) who's dealing with the consequences of her shitty choices, she's absolutely miserable at her own sister's wedding because she's slept with her fiance and she's considered a fuck up by everyone and her past is just fucking her up constantly and all that right?? and suddenly she mistakenly becomes a part of the time loop and now he has another person with him, she's not lonely anymore but she wants to escape it and they're having fun, feeling nice together and all that, and then she finds that the other mc lied to her and it's devastating ofc it is

and the way they behave is what I'm talking about concerning barbie and ken,,, because as soon as she leaves, the man Nyles is inconsolable, he tries to find her, goes mad doing everything in his capacity to find her, tries ways to kill himself just to find her again and that's it?? cause he's sorta grieving what they could've been and how he fucked up and all that,,,

but her, she goes and learns physics. like tf? every time the loop resets, she goes and sits at a cafe and learns quantum physics and figures a way out and experiments her way through it (is it a little convenient and far fetched that she could learn it this easily? with no previous background in it or anything else we know of? ofc yes? but is the suspension of disbelief similar to that in a barbie movie?? yk the answer is a yes 🤷‍♀️) and then she comes back with a way to get them both out of the situation that they are technically in because of him while he mopes around in the background waiting for her

the good omens thingy is the one that happens in the ending of season 2 wherein both Aziraphale and Crowley want to be together, but the way and the place they want to do it at is very different (gross simplification but essentially),,, and in palm springs (a movie that I watched for funsies and wasn't supposed to write this about) they both are essentially in a similar situation with Nyles wanting to be together w her but in the loop while she wants them to get out of it together and figure it out yk,,, it's also a nicer version of that conflict as they do end up agreeing on doing one of these things together rather than seperating (temporarily but still,, unlike some celestial beings 👀)

and yeah. that's it ig

PS,,, ik I'm talking about three movies here to get the full context of this but like it fits?! and I can't help it. (emphatic period and not an exclamation mark because I'm not desperate)

PPS,,, side note I feel so sad for tala (Camila mendes's character because she's like the only not shitty(ish) character out of all of them who ends up being married to a mf cheater who cheated on her a day before their wedding with! HER! FUCKING! SISTER! (AGAIN A DAY BEFORE THEIR WEDDING!)

PPPS,,, that's just the way I understand it and all of these movies together but yea,,, also it's fun to see men being 'rescued' and essentially just existing characters in place of women (but that could be just me 🤷‍♀️)