#she remembers that i told her i’m going back to university and she always asks me about it
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muffingnf · 5 months ago
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one of the best parts of working with elderly people with dementia is when they’re able to tell you something from their life and you can like. see the recognition and familiarity of what they’re saying in their face
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a-b-riddle · 7 months ago
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Part Five
Can't stop thinking about the attempt of reconciliation and reader ain't having it. Our girl is going to be wilddddd y'all. Also goodnight. See y'all tomorrow (maybe)
You call Meredith when you get home.
You. Are. Fuming. She's not sure she can ever remember a time you using so many swear words at one time.
How fucking dare them? Immature? You're the immature one? You were the one trying your best to salvage four failing relationship meanwhile none of those assholes could be bothered to try and keep one. They had one person to manage: you.
"I wanna go out this weekend." "Wear something tight and borderline risk indecent exposure."
"You know what I always say," Meredith begins. "The best way to get over someone-"
"is to get under someone else." You finish. You weren't exactly keen on the idea of bringing someone to your bed just yet, but a little attention would do you some good. "I don't want to fuck someone just yet." You admitted. "I'm more on the getting drunk and making out."
"I didn't know we resorted back secondary school heavy petting?" She teased.
"University, Dear." You corrected. "I didn't peak until after I graduated."
"No." She argued. "You didn't put your books down long enough to realize that boys actually wanted to fuck you." You were glad she couldn't see you roll your eyes. "Saturday work for you? I have a late night Friday and won't be up for it."
"That works."
"Sorry." She apologized. "I plan on getting you absolutely smashed so I need to be ready to play the nanny. I know how you love to get drunk and run off."
It was true. You had always found it hilarious when you were drunk to just run. Quite literally run away. It got to a point during university where Meredith would handcuff you to her so you didn't stray.
"I won't run." Your sober mind promised.
"Uh huh." Meredith's tone told you that she knew that was a load of shit. "I'll text Tabs. Let her know the plan."
The next day at the shop was pretty uneventful. No more unexpected visitors. You still had them all blocked. Not caring if now they decided to offer up some bullshit apology.
Months. This had been a steady decline for six months. A text or a simply sorry won't fix this. You weren't sure anything could.
But it didn't matter. You were done and they obviously were too.
You had picked up enough take out to feed a family, but you didn't plan on making your lunch before work or cooking when you got home. The rest of the week you planned on just going through the motions until you could go out Saturday and hopefully get everything out.
You weren't paying attention as you walked down the hallway to your flat. Fishing in your purse for keys. You were at almost at your door when you saw him.
Sitting next to your door was a familiar face. A face you felt you haven't seen in forever.
“What are you doing here, Kyle?" Your voice was flat as you continued to blindly try and find your keys with one hand. Fuck. You really need to clean out your purse...
“My key wouldn’t work.” He explained. "So I’m out here.”
"I'm aware why you're not in my apartment since I changed the locks," you said, trying to keep your irritation at bay. "What I am asking is why did you come here?"
"You won't return any of our messages."
"You're all blocked, so technically I didn't really get any messages." "Besides, you don't get to complain to me about not responding to texts, Kyle Garrick." Your fingers finally wraps around them. God bless. "If you're here for your things, it'll have to wait. I have to sort through everyone's shit and I don't know whose is whose."
"We need to talk." He explains as you put the key into the lock, opening the door.
"Nah," you say scrunching your nose in that way he used to adore. "I'm good. But you can swing by tomorrow and pick up your things if you'd like." You say before trying to shut the door on him. You were stupid in thinking you could be faster than him.
Dammit.
"I know things haven't been good and I've definitely could have been better,'' he admits. "But can you at least try and let us apologize? Let us try and work it out."
"No." You answered, trying to close the door. Not caring if you had to resort to kicking his shins to get him out.
"Why not?" He countered.
“Maybe because I've already tried, Kyle?” You gave up on trying to shut him out. You were strong, but he didn't have any issues in besting you. “Because I actually tried with you. With all of you. You didn’t need to come here giving me excuses about your life being hectic because I’ve made the excuses for you.” You didn't miss how he practically flinched. He had always blamed his busy life. Family. Work. You stopped caring about whatever excuse he gave you and realized it was just that. An excuse. “I’ve been telling myself for months that everything you guys didn’t do for me wasn’t because you didn’t care about me. It was because of the stress of your deployments is the reason none of you tell me when you get back from until it’s time to fuck. I tell myself it’s because of the fucked up situation of me being with all of you that makes it awkward to meet your families. Families you all have that I now know I’m not worthy of meeting.” He wanted to correct you. You were. You were worthy. He was an idiot. “It’s not that I need your excuses to make me feel like what you did was justified. No matter what it was, it was apparently to you because you did it.”
He took a step back, processing everything you had said. He had been selfish. You were the reliable constant in his life. Someone he believed he never disappointed. Someone he couldn't disappoint no matter how many times he fucked up.
You took the opportunity to slam the door. Quickly turning the lock before he had a chance to open it back up.
God...
That felt good.
You had spent that evening collecting their thing in case Kyle did show back up tomorrow. You wouldn't make their lives easier by sorting all their shit and organizing it. Everything. One box. Let them figure it out. You almost had a mind to add a shirt that you knew didn't belong to any of them just to have them argue over it. Or least make them think there was someone else...
You were almost tempted if not for the premise that you wanted them to realize this was their fault. Their fuck up. But now that you were officially all broken up, you were free game.
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iamnotoriginalphil · 1 month ago
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Lay Claim (Agatha Harkness x f!Reader)
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Synopsis: The return of Agatha's ex stirs up feelings in you that would rather have been left in the past.
Words: 2.8k
Warnings: jealousy, possessiveness, a few swear words, angst, mommy kink kind of
When you were told the Witches Road would show you your deepest fears you’d been expecting something like clowns or zombies or the inescapable plod towards death. What you weren’t expecting was Agatha’s ex to show up and stir up all kinds of feelings. That was not the kind of fear you were thinking you would be shown.
Watching Agatha and Rio interact, you felt a pit in your stomach. Turning your gaze down to your bare feet, you scowled, not wanting to keep watching, not wanting to keep feeling. Your silence was all encompassing, not able to even feign interest while this show was going in front of you.
An arm wound through yours, startling you. Glancing up, blue eyes were staring out at the coven you’d unwittingly joined, lips pressed together.
“The universe is conspiring against me,” Agatha said, a displeased growl of a voice.
“Oh please. I doubt the universe is even thinking about you,” you replied.
She rolled her eyes but her lips pulled up into a small smile. The flutter of your heart shouldn’t have been your response, but anything that give her some modicum of entertainment always did that to you. You liked being able to make her happy, even if it was only for a fleeting moment.
“You can’t trust her,” she said, lowering her voice, eyes trained on Rio.
“I know,” you replied, a sick twist in your gut.
You’d met Agatha long before she’d gone after Wanda and gotten caught in Westview. Back then, it had been the fluttering beginnings of romantic feelings. Soft glances, fingers brushing together, soft whispers over spell books late at night. Right on the precipice of something more, you’d teetered for months, waiting for one of you to make a move. And then she’d disappeared.
When she’d walked into your shop with a teenager in tow, you’d been completely caught off guard. Your heart had thudded once, twice, in your chest and you’d had no words. But you’d shown up to her house at the allotted time. Of course you had. It was still a case of when she told you to jump, you asked how high.
After so many years apart with no word from her, you were jumping pretty fucking high to be with her again.
“She’ll hurt you for her own sick gain,” she said, her eyes still locked on the other woman.
Rio turned, looking over her shoulder at the two of you. The wink she gave only made your jaw clench. Those brown eyes lazily dragged from Agatha to you, her smirk settling deeper on her face before turning back to looking forward.
“You assume I can’t take care of myself,” you said, knowing you didn’t sound pleased.
In your peripheral vision, you saw her head finally turn towards you. Those brilliant blue eyes were like a ghostly caress, sweeping over you before settling on your face. She lent closer, her breath ghosting over your skin. You fought against a shiver, knowing there was no way to hide it with her so close.
“Can you?” she asked.
You turned towards her, nose almost brushing hers.
“Just because I’ve never fought you before doesn’t mean I can’t,” you said, “I’m not the one who had her powers taken. I didn’t choose to take such a big risk and ended up losing it all.”
“No need to be mean, kitten,” she said, lips pouting and like a moth to a flame, your gaze focused on them.
“Isn’t there?” you asked, your eyes meeting hers again.
She didn’t give you an answer, only drawing back far enough that the two of you weren’t sharing the same air. You glanced away, finding brown eyes watching in interest. Turning to stare out at the trees, you ignored that probing look from the only person you refused to give your answers to.
“I remember you talking more,” Agatha said as if you hadn’t been difficult, “a real chatty Cathy.”
“It’s been years. People change,” you said with a small shrug that she must have felt through the arm still wound around yours.
“I didn’t think you would,” she said.
“Why?” you asked, not sure what you were hoping to get from her.
“Because I liked you how you were,” she replied.
“But not now,” you said, hating that you’d asked in the first place.
“I’m still deciding,” she said, almost distantly, like the answer didn’t matter.
The answer definitely mattered.
Later, walking beside Jen, you were doing your best to not look at Agatha and Rio again. Snipping at each other, the animosity a front for unspoken sexual tension, you were finding it difficult not to listen in. It was making your skin itch.
“So you knew Agatha before all this?” Jen asked.
“Uh huh,” you said, still watching the two of them bickering.
“What was she like? When you knew her?” she asked.
“Uh… kind of similar to how she is now,” you replied, dragging your gaze away from her, “a liar, manipulative, but so much fun. She was my best friend.”
You glanced back to her, finding blue eyes already there to meet yours. The moment stretched and you felt yourself trembling. Forcing yourself to look away, you found Jen watching with interest.
“But that was years ago,” you said, waving off the pit in your gut, acting as if it no longer existed.
“What happened?” she asked.
“What always happens. She disappeared into the night,” you replied.
“So what? She dropped you without warning?” she asked.
You narrowed your eyes at her, considering her for a moment. She was still looking at you expectantly. You wrinkled your nose and sped up, leaving her behind without an answer. The weight of a heavy gaze stayed on you, longer than you were expecting. You refused to meet those eyes again, hating every second of what you were feeling. This was not what you’d signed up for.
Except it was.
“So what made you agree to this little adventure?”
You’d been so caught up in your own thoughts you hadn’t realised that Rio had fallen into step beside you. You glanced over then away again, keeping your gaze straight ahead.
“All encompassing power,” you replied.
“Ha, right,” she said, “I’m sure that was the incentive that had you joining this band of merry men.”
“What other reason could I have?” you snapped, immediately regretting it when you saw the lick of satisfaction passing over her face.
“Perhaps you feel a sense of loyalty for a certain beguiling witch,” she said.
You scoffed, hoping to cover up the exact reason.
“Or maybe,” she said, drawing even closer, breath ghosting over your ear, “you just want to please mommy.”
You jerked back, snapping your head around to look at her. She was grinning, delighting in your heated cheeks and thudding heart. Her hand slid along your lower back, curling around your hip as she tugged you closer. Your breath was a shudder and your skin felt on fire. Brown eyes rested on your lips for just a moment before finding yours again. You didn’t even realise the two of you had stopped walking.
“Is that why you’re doing it? Are you hoping to be mommy’s special girl?” she asked, voice lowering into a whisper.
You pressed your lips together, eyes darting up, searching for someone, anyone, who could interrupt this moment. Blue eyes flashed and you felt your breath catch.
“Take your hands off her,” Agatha growled.
“And why would I do that?” Rio asked, head rolling in the direction of the other witch.
“Because I told you to,” she said.
“But she’s such a pretty pet,” she said, looking back at you.
Her nail trailed over your lip, a threat held in the gentle touch. You shoved at her, only to find her pressing you closer, chest to chest, caught up in her arms like twisting vines. She drew closer, the scent of wet dirt and rotting leaves invading your nose.
“Stop,” Agatha said.
“No one lays claim to her,” Rio said, lips almost close enough to brush yours, “she’s free game.”
“I claim her.” Agatha’s voice had hardened.
The small noise you made was embarrassing. So close, there was no possibility Rio had missed it, probably locking it away to use against Agatha at a later date. But to hear those words after all this time… You hadn’t been able to stop yourself. Rio released you, stepping away with a small shrug.
“If you say so,” she said. Agatha snatched at your arm, steering you away from the other witch. Your jaw clenched but you let her, like a toy won in a game of tug of war between two toddlers. Ignoring the audience watching on, she strode off, leading everyone further down the road.
“You didn’t have to do that,” you muttered under your breath.
“Yes,” she said, her voice still hard, “I did.”
You didn’t argue, letting her continue to steer you with the strong hold she had on your arm, just above your elbow, fingers digging in hard enough to make you wonder if there would be bruises there later. That wouldn’t be such a bad thing, you thought.
She kept silent until you made camp, another day on the road leaving you weary. The flickering fire crackled, the voices of the women familiar in ways you hadn’t experienced in such a long time. Agatha sat beside you, silent and brooding, shoulder brushing against yours. Across the fire, Rio was watching with dark eyes and darker smile.
It felt as if you were turning into a pawn in a game of power you had never agreed to play.
When it came time to lay on the bed of leaves, you curled into a ball, your back to both women. All you wanted was a moment to yourself, the roiling in your stomach and the burning in your veins toxic, making it impossible to forget the jealousy you’d been grappling with this entire trip. This god forsaken trip. You squeezed your eyes closed, willing yourself to sleep.
You weren’t sure how much time had passed, the sky never changing from perpetual night. Soft fingers were gently stroking through your hair. Your forehead was gently resting against the side of a warm thigh, your body curled towards the woman you’d missed more than you’d admitted to her. Your unconscious mind had sought out what you hadn’t let yourself want in your waking hours.
Keeping your eye closed, you pressed your face against Agatha’s leg. Her fingers stilled for a moment before continuing. It was soothing, her touch something you’d missed for so many years.
“I missed you,” you whispered, still soft with sleep, not quite able to stop yourself.
“I know you did, hon,” she said, still carding her fingers through your hair.
You sighed, knowing that was probably the best you were ever going to get from her. You shuffled away, dislodging her fingers. Sitting up, you plucked leaves from your hair, letting them flutter back to the road. She reached out for you but you shook your head.
“Don’t,” you said, “this is… I can’t do this.”
Scrabbling to your feet, you looked down at her. The expression on her face was hurt and confused before the mask slammed back into place.
“Fine by me,” she said, “if you can’t do it then you can’t do it.”
“Fine,” you said.
You spun on your heels and strode off, giving yourself the chance to calm down. The ache in your chest was only growing the more time you spent with her and you were certain it was going to end in heartbreak. For you, specifically. Even if she had done that whole claiming thing with Rio.
Which, you weren’t going to lie, was still making your knees weak when you thought about it.
Shoving your fingers through the front of your hair, clenching your fist, you stared out at the road. You should have never agreed to join Agatha’s coven. You’d known it was a bad idea even as you’d shown up to her house. And yet here you were, like a love sick puppy, unable to say no to her.
“Just to be clear, what is the this you can’t do?”
You jumped, spinning around. Agatha, in all of her witchy glory, had managed to follow you on silent feet.
“Don’t sneak up on me,” you admonished, your heart beating too fast in your chest.
“I see your perceptive abilities are still the same as ever,” she said.
“You know what? I take it back. I wish you’d left me alone,” you said.
“You don’t mean that, hon,” she said.
“I do,” you said, “because then I wouldn’t feel like this and I could have continued on assuming you’d just grown tired of me instead of whatever is going on now.”
“You thought I’d grown tired of you?” she asked.
You glanced up, finding those blue eyes staring at you with such intensity it made you shiver.
“We argued about you going after Wanda, but you went anyway and when you didn’t come back I just assumed…” you said, trailing off.
“That I was finished with you,” she finished for you.
“I mean, now I know that wasn’t it, and don’t get me wrong, I want to crucify Wanda for what she did to you. But then on the other hand, it hasn’t exactly been the way it was before you left,” you said.
“I’m glad you recognise you’ve been acting out of character,” she said.
“Not me,” you snapped, “you. You’ve been all mooney eyed over Rio. Lingering glances and stolen looks and bickering all over the place.”
“Careful, kitten. You’re sounding jealous,” she said, taking a swaying step closer.
“Say’s the woman who was ready to throw down with a woman who simply touched me,” you said.
“She was doing a bit more than touch you,” she scoffed.
You closed the gap with her, both hands grasping her face. Her own hands came up, fingers curling around your wrists in a tight grip.
“Don’t throw stones in glass houses, Agatha,” you warned, pulling her closer.
“I’ve missed you too,” she murmured, making your heart ache, “before that bitch put me under her spell, when I was there in Westview getting ready to take her magic. The entire time I wished you were there with me.”
“And now? Do you still wish I was with you?” you asked.
“More than anything,” she whispered.
“And Rio?” you asked.
“Can burn in hell,” she replied, “and if she touches you again she won’t be making it to the end of the road. You’re mine, pet, and only mine.”
“As long as you know I claim you too,” you said.
She lingered, a hair’s breadth from your lips. With your hands still cupping her cheeks, you closed the distance, kissing her the way you’d spent so long dreaming of. It wasn’t the stuff of romance, soft and sweet and butterfly inducing. She kissed you like she owned you, possessing you. You dragged her closer, pressing your body to hers, wanting to feel every inch of her.
The kissed deepened. Heat spread through your veins and you moaned, hands sliding from her cheeks to her hair, tangling your fingers in it until it pulled. Her teeth sunk into your lower lip. You whimpered into her mouth, clutching tighter, not caring how needy you were being. You’d waited long enough for this. You weren’t about to play it cool enough for her to think she’d made the wrong decision by kissing you.
She dragged herself away from your lips, eyes darkened and lips kiss swollen, a flush high on her cheeks. You thought she’d never looked so beautiful, nor more desirable. She was the kind of temptation that had your knees growing weak.
“I bet you’re not wishing I’d left you alone now,” she said, but the breathless note undercut the cocky attitude she was trying for.
“Shut up,” you laughed, pulling her in for another kiss.
You didn’t know how much time passed like that, losing yourself in her. But when you returned to the fire once more, you curled up beside her, head resting in her lap, letting her fingers run through your hair once more. It was the best you’d slept in quite a long time.
The next day, no one mentioned the change between the two of you, but they didn’t have to. It was obvious. Agatha had laid claim to you and you, without any argument, had laid claim to her too.
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gor3sigil · 3 months ago
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I’m Trans and Insane and I’m doing fine.
[TW Psychosis, transphobia, psychophobia, medication, psych ward]
“Are you sure ?” she asked.
I remember looking back at her in disbelief, because that was certainly a question I never asked her when she came out.
“Why do you ask ?” I say.
“Dude, I’ve seen you go into depersonalization so hard you even thought you were a human soul in a robot vessel and now, you want me to trust you when you say that you, too, are trans ?”
That’s the memory that comes back to me as I fold and put in my bag my psychiatrist’s note attesting that I suffer from gender dysphoria, NOT LINKED to any psychotic symptoms. Here it goes in my folder with my prescription note, an increase - again - of my anti depressants and Xan, and my endocrinologist’s HRT prescription, increased too - finally.
I go to two separate pharmacies to pick up each prescription for two reasons:
There is only one in this godforsaken town that always had testosterone in stock.
I can’t explain to you with words the look you can get when you give back to back, to someone who, despite not being a doctor, works in healthcare, a note for trans HRT and then a note for psychiatric meds.
And I’m lucky, because I’m not taking antipsychotics anymore. Contrarily to what you could think, it doesn’t magically makes the voices and the shadowy people disappear, but it can make a mess of your head pretty bad and my doctor and I both agreed that I didn’t need more damage up here than what I already had. And no, it doesn’t make your delusions vanish magically too: in fact, I was still pretty certain that I was talking to my soul family out here in Argentine telepathically about my mission on Earth, the meds just made it more difficult to understand their voices, but the belief was still solid.
Anyways, I’m back home with the Hoy Grail I fought tooth and nails to get: a letter from the Sacred Council of Mental Sanity also known as Psychiatry that I was, indeed, a bit delulu, but also trans, and that both things didn’t play into each other. My transness wasn’t a delusion, my delusions didn’t have anything to do with being trans.
Or did it ?
Chicken or egg, you know the drill. Did I have my selves fractured before and one of the piece that shattered my brain happened to make me trans or was I just trans with a shitload of traumas in the back that made me insane ?
But don’t worry, at least, trans people when we’re together, we have each other’s back ! Right ?
“Transidentity ISN’T a mental illness !! We don’t DESERVE to be FORCIBLY LOCKED UP and MEDICATED and MADE TO CONFORM FOR OTHER’S SENSE OF SECURITY !!”
Neither do I, RIGHT ?
Oh
Or do I ?
Remember what she said, my girlfriend, right at the beginning ?
How I can’t be trusted about myself when sometimes I don’t even have a sense of self anymore or I have too much selves who fight against each other ?
And what do we say to that ?
Get treatment. Get in-patient. Take medication. And for the love of God, shut the fuck up about it, you’re giving us a bad name.
Because being trans and crazy can’t exist. It’s absurd. You have to fix one of these two things. Choose which jacket I’ll wear, and they call it a straitjacket for a reason it seems, so am I queer or am I insane ?
All I know today is there isn’t a universe in which I’m a trans without any mental illnesses, or mentally ill without being trans. And yet, I can’t tell you how many time I got asked “do you think you’d be trans if you never got through [x trauma] ?”. I. Don’t. Know. I’ll never know. And I deserve just as much agency as you get despite being mentally ill. If you don’t believe in that, don’t come yapping about “liberation for all of us”, but “if one of us is crazy they’ll all think I am too and that can’t happen”.
No LGBTQIAA+ person deserves to be told they need to be put away, to be cured, to be allowed out in the open only if they’re deemed “acceptable” by society’s standards. And no mentally ill people deserve to either.
No trans person should be going through years of counseling to have the access to HRT.
And I shouldn’t have had to threaten my own mother’s life to avoid being locked in an adult psych ward at 14.
If you ever think, for one second, that these two things have nothing to do with one another, you are far removed from history.
To hear queer people say “yeah but some mentally ill people are dangerous !” feels like you don’t even know where you come from.
And if I want to say, that me being trans is linked to me being mentally ill, or at least, that both are connected in a way, all hell breaks fucking loose.
So I’ll explain very carefully.
See, when I was young, my mind got shattered into a thousand of pieces I had to try to glue back on. All these pieces of myself broke further more down the line because I couldn’t catch a fucking break. And now, it happens that the final puzzle does not have the same face it had before. It happens that its shape changed over time, for reasons over the control of all of us who tried to build ourselves back. Now there’s a bigger picture, less pieces, a few other shadows, and me. Built from the shatters. With my own needs and afflictions.
And whoever you are, whatever your agenda might be, I will not let anyone take any agency away from me under the false pretext that I can’t know anything for myself. They say that about children, they say that about minorities, about physically disabled people, about the people they want OUT. And my trans siblings, you know that.
I came out for the first time 7 years ago, to my then girlfriend, who was the one asking the question that is the first sentence of this text. I came out a second time 3 years ago. Been on HRT, had top surgery, had psychotic breaks, got my meds changed, switch therapist.
Because I am trans and crazy. And yet, all these choices I made, I made myself. It didn’t have to be that hard to get the basic care I needed. It didn’t need to be. But it WAS. And I’m part of the lucky crowd of people who had access to out-patient treatment, who never have been locked up in ward, who managed to stay alive through meds withdrawals without medical assistance when I had no therapist.
Be very careful of when you start to put conditions on the rights you think you deserve. Be very, very careful about your definition of sanity and of how it warps the way you see people. When you start to say “I have access to that, but there’s people like X or Y who shouldn’t BECAUSE”, pause and ask yourself what led you to think this way. More often than not, you’ll find yourself playing the same mind games as the ones you swore to fight against, and when it gives them the upper hand, they won’t hesitate to come for you after that.
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propertyofwicked · 8 months ago
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SECRETS part 2 - LN
lando x fewtrell!reader
no content warnings in this part, i promise the next part will have some actual fluff to it
previous part -> next part
masterlist the playlist
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y/n was easily won over by chicken nuggets and a diet coke - a fact lando knew too well. both he and max had both spent almost hundreds on the food combo every time y/n was roped into one of their plans. whether she was lying to her parents to cover up where max had been all night, or even just being asked to hold a camera or a boom mic for a quadrant video, she was always rewarded with 6 chicken nuggets and a diet coke.
lando had in fact not included max in his late night plans, and very quickly made it known as to why.
“so, how’s uni?” he asked, warming her up for the incoming conversation, turning onto a side road and pulling the car to a stop.
“yea it’s good thanks, how’s driving?”
“could be better, i could be better,” he smiled sadly, but glad she asked about driving as she fell directly into his trap, “why did you stop coming to races?”
“lando,” she sighs his name, almost disappointed in him for even asking, “university’s a lot of work you know. i can’t fly around the world to watch you drive a car. and, i still watch the races - just from home.”
“so it’s nothing to do with me?”
“well ignoring me for a year doesn’t help your case, but no, it’s not to do with you. you know i’ll always be there when i can. when im invited,” the emphasis on invited hung like hot air in the car, and created and unsettling silence.
“lan, can i ask you a question?” she said, breaking the awkward atmosphere in the car.
“mhm, anything.”
“why did you stop talking to me? i know we’re not as close as you and max,” she adds, lando almost wincing at the mention of his best friend, “and i know you were busy being, you know, a superstar and that. but even over your break, i saw you like twice in passing.”
“im sorry y/n, honestly it wasn’t intentiona-”
“bullshit, try again norris. the truth this time.”
lando breathed in deep, as if to lock and load his next statement.
“max he, uh, he told me he’d seen some pictures of us. you remember that club in monaco?,” she nodded in response, remembering the encounter with lando that night in somewhat drunken detail, “he wasn’t happy with me. thought we had something going on behind his back. y/n when i say angry, i mean he was one step away from beating me up and then keying my car.”
“but there was nothi- i mean we weren’t d-”
“i know, i tried to tell him,” lando sighed, “he gets a bit, let’s say ‘over protective’ with you i guess. doesn’t trust me maybe? i don’t know.”
“so instead of letting me discuss it with him, you refused to acknowledge my existence for a year? yeah that’s mint, let’s do that,” she said, the sarcasm rolling off her tongue.
“i was a dick, ok - i’m sorry. but your brother is slightly terrifying when he’s angry. think he’s realised he was wrong - that’s why he let you come to the race im guessing.”
he was wrong - but was he? was max completely wrong to assume what he had? she thought the feelings were mutual but clearly lando had other ideas.
“can i drive your car?” y/n asked, smiling over to lando in the drivers seat. he’s started driving around aimlessly again, deciding to put an end to the conversation about where they stood with each other. his head whipped around to look at her, his eyebrows quirked up in a mix of confusion and immediate refusal. he wasn’t even driving one of his more expensive cars, as they all stayed in monaco. but of course, lando norris needs a high end car in every country.
“please, lan,” she said again, eyes widening in attempt to tug on his heart strings, “please. i miss driving, i haven’t driven since like, christmas since my car died and went to car heaven.”
“y/n, angel,” the nickname wasn’t something new, but it still flipped something about in her stomach, ”if anything, that makes me want to say no even more. besides, it’s automatic - you drive manual.”
“oh come on, it’s literally just a pedal for stop and go. please.”
“not tonight,” he said, looking at her to show his sad frown as if that would make her happy about the rejection, “if i get podium tomorrow, ill put some money towards getting you a new car.”
“lan, please you don’t have to do that.”
“i know i don’t have to. i want to. besides, if i get podium i think i owe my lucky charm something to show my gratitude, no?” he said. y/n knew this was an argument she wouldn’t win, so she smiled up at him, nodding slightly.
the car fell back into a silence, comfortable this time, with only the sound of lando’s music playing quietly out of the speakers, and the odd whooshing of a car driving past.
the car came to a still, the red light reflected on the their faces as they waited for the light to change.
“the stars look pretty tonight,” she said absentmindedly. y/n was never one to sit in silence without at least attempting to fill it.
“yeah, they do,” lando responded, although he wasn’t looking at the stars, moreover, he was staring directly at the light reflecting onto y/n’s face. his own mouth curling up into a smile when he saw your soft features grinning contently at the sky.
it was around 1am when y/n and lando returned to the hotel car park, casually discussing life at university and where y/n saw herself using her degree in the future.
“i think it’s better if we don’t tell max about this,” she mumbled, tilting her head to the side, catching lando’s eyes. her own eyes blinking slowly in exhaustion.
“i think so too. are you going to tell him what i said?”
“not right now. but i refuse to let him believe has any right to threaten his own friends in a bid to control my life,” she says, her body now twisted fully to face him directly.
“just,” he sighed, “dont get violent,” his hand reaching over to rest on her knee.
“me? violent? that is a bold accusation, norris.”
“y/n - i know you. just don’t be too harsh, he thought he was doing what was best.”
“thinking is always max’s downfall,” she responds with a snort. she turns her body back, arm reaching to grab the handle when lando catches her other arm, forcing her to look at him again.
“i’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”
“i’ll be there.”
sneaking back into a room was usually y/n’s specialty, but she’d never attempted to sneak past max before. rather, her teens were spent sneaking back into the house with max. unlocking the door and pulling the handle down, y/n pushed softly on the wood, but the creaking was so loud in the silence of their hotel room. the floor boards to her bag of clothes seemed to have a vendetta against her today too, she could’ve sworn they did not creak when she had walked across them earlier.
the bathroom tap decided to splutter loudly and spit freezing cold water down her, and the door to slide back open and allow the stream of light to fall directly on max’s face.
“y/n?” her brother groaned, “you just come back in?”
“yeah, sorry - i tried to be quiet,” she whispered back, turning the bathroom light off and stumbling gracefully through the dark room to the sofa.
“it’s 1am? you were in the gym for 3 hours?”
“erm, yeah,” her voice wavered in the lie, “i got distracted on the treadmill. tired myself out though.”
max grumbled something in response, too sleepy to say anything further.
the next morning max walked down to the hotel lobby, passing the gym in his journey for breakfast.
open 7:00 - 23:00
hang on, he thought to himself, shut at 11?
where had his sister been? she couldn’t have been in the gym till 1am, so where had she been, and why had she lied?
★ ☆ ✦ ✧ ✩ ✶
tag list: @harrysdimple05 @scopeiguess @hiireadstuff @landosgirlxoxo @natt9598 @phantomxoxo @val-writes
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kaleldobrev · 1 year ago
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Old Man
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Pairing: Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader Summary: Dean never had a problem with the age gap between you two; not until now any way Word Count: 3.4k Warnings: Age Gap, Cursing (13x), Sexual Innuendos, Dean talking bad about himself, Frat guys giving Y/N the disrespect she doesn’t deserve Authors Note: Me and Jensen have a 17-year age gap – what’s your age gap? | This came out A LOT longer than I expected | I don’t know how to write frat guys xD | If you liked this, don’t forget to like & reblog. I really appreciate it! Feedback is always welcome ♡
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You and Dean pulled up in front of a gas station; needing to stop for gas and maybe a few snacks before the two of you continued your almost four-hour long journey back to the Bunker. You and Dean had just spent the weekend in Lawrence, due to the very rare occurrence that there were no cases. You had told Dean that even though you’d been living at the Bunker with him and Sam for the past couple of years, you had never once been to Lawrence even though you could have easily made a day trip out of it. With that being said, Dean was more than happy to take you and show you around, reminiscing about some of the things that he remembered doing all those years ago back when he was four; back before everything. But that’s not all the trip was, you had done some other things too; like visiting the Biodiversity Institute and Natural History Museum – which was considered to be one of the best museums in the entire state of Kansas, along with Grinter Farms – who prided themselves on their sunflower photo-ops. You enjoyed both places immensely, and were happy that Dean did too, even if he wasn’t initially keen on going to either place at first.
“I’m gonna grab us some snacks while you do the pump.” You said, grabbing your wallet from the glove compartment. Once you closed it and before you exited the car, you looked over at Dean, who was currently giving you the most serious look on his face. “What?”
“You already know what I’m going to say Sweetheart.” His tone sounding just as serious as his facial expression had looked. 
“Pie.” You said in unison.
“Cherry or apple?” You asked, the two of you getting out of the car at the same time.
“Like you have to ask.” Dean stated, opening up the fuel cap.
“Just making sure Dean. I mean, I don’t want to come out with apple when you really wanted cherry.” Your comment earned a slight chuckle from him.
“I’ll be getting some cherry pie later, don’t you worry.” He winked.
“I don’t think that applies to me anymore.” You smirked.
“We can always pretend.” He started fueling Baby just then. 
“Now that’s a roleplay idea I can get behind.” You winked at him before making your way into the store.
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As soon as you walked into the store to grab some snacks for the two of you – one of which needed to be pie; a car pulled up the next pump over with a group of about four men who all appeared to be from the University of Kansas solely based on their Jayhawks apparel. “I don’t know dude. I’m pretty sure that chick was into me.” One of the men said, causing the one that he was talking to, to roll his eyes.
“No dude. She was into me. She was giving me the old fuck me eyes. Did you not see that? Or were you too busy looking at her ass?” He laughed. It was the other guy’s turn to roll his eyes.
“Can you blame me? You could bounce a quarter off that thing.” The young man replied.
“Hell yeah you could!” The other one agreed, giving each other a high five. 
There was a part of Dean that found their conversation funny because he had remembered when he was like that; but it hadn’t been for some time. Yes, there were times when he was still like that, but it was solely reserved for one woman: and that woman was you.
“Check out that piece of ass in the store there.” Another one of the men who hadn’t talked before was talking now. His comment caused Dean to turn in their direction and then back into the store. There was no other person that they could be talking about but you, as you were the only person in there besides the clerk behind the counter; and Dean was pretty sure they weren’t talking about the balding clerk.
“Bet she’s a good fuck.” One of the men said. Oh you have no idea. Dean thought to himself. 
“I’ll bet you thirty bucks that I can convince her to have sex with me.” The first guy said, the one that had noticed you in the first place.
“Dude, there’s no fucking way she’d have sex with you.” The next guy said. “Look at her! She’s way out of your league. Plus, even if you could pull her, where are the two of you gonna do it uh? The dirty gas station bathroom?” 
“Sure why not? I bet she wouldn’t mind it at all.” He winked. His comment caused Dean to chuckle a little to himself, knowing how wrong that guy was. You and Dean have had sex in a variety of different places, but never a gas station bathroom. “Dean, as much as I love you, I’m not fucking in a gas station bathroom. That’s honestly my only limitation.” You once told him. “So, Waffle House bathroom is okay then?” He joked back, causing you to give him a playful smack on the arm from his remark. 
“Dude, she’s not gonna give you the time of day. She needs a real man. And that ain’t you.” The man started walking around to the other side of the pump and started making his way toward the store. You ain’t a real man dude. Dean thought to himself. None of them were what he would call a man, only boys pretending to be.
“Watch and learn boys!” The guy said using his most charismatic voice. Dean wasn’t worried at all; he knew that you would never give the guy the time of day. You two had been together for the last couple of years, and the group of quote on quote men weren’t remotely your type in the slightest. Dean had seen pictures of your previous exes or have worked cases with them before. All your previous exes besides about one were all hunters; not varsity jock looking guys, and that’s what those guys were.
“Hey kid, I wouldn’t if I were you.” Dean finally chimed in. At first, he wasn’t even going to say anything. He had almost wanted to see the boy come back out the store with the look of utter embarrassment on his face when you had rejected him; which he knew was going to happen. But the jealous side of him won in that moment. He knew that you were more than capable of handling yourself – you were one of the best hunters he’d ever seen or worked with. He’d seen you get hit on plenty of times either when you two went to the bar together or while working a case; but those men never seemed like threats to him. But this time, this time felt different for him.
“I’m sorry?” The guy questioned.
“I said, I wouldn’t if I were you.” Dean said, his voice a bit more stern than usual.
“What’s it to you?” The guy asked, giving a slight snort.
“She’s going to reject you buddy. Trust me.” Dean finished filling the car up and put the pump back in its place. “Just trying to save you the embarrassment in front of your buddies here.”
“Oh yeah? Why do you say that?” The guy turned to look at you. You were currently standing at the counter laughing, probably at something the clerk had just said with two apple pie containers in your hands. Although Dean couldn’t hear your laugh, the sound of it echoed in his brain. God, he loved the sound of your laugh.
“That piece of ass” Dean began to say, hating using the words that they had used to describe you, “is my girlfriend.” Dean smirked. He had hoped that his usual tactic would work like it had done in the past. In the past, whenever Dean was with a woman; regardless if she was his girlfriend or not, the minute he said the word girlfriend to another guy that was hitting on his girlfriend, date, etc. the guy would usually back off, not wanting to get into any trouble. But his usual tactic didn’t work, it had simply just made the guy laugh.
“Your girlfriend?” The man laughed again. “Yeah, okay Old Man.” 
“Old, Old Man?” Dean was caught off guard. No one had ever really called him an old man before; the only one who ever did it was Claire, but she was the exception, because she was basically family to him.
“Yeah. What are you? Like 50?” The guy behind him chimed in.
Dean turned around. “50? You think I’m 50? I’m 42 dude.” Yet more laughter from the men.
“Close enough.” The man that was close to the store said. At that moment Dean had saw you wave goodbye to the clerk and started to head out toward the door. The man looked at you, and then eyed his buddies, making his way toward Dean. “Listen, tell her that if she wants someone that can keep it up without the use of meds and doesn’t go to bed before 6, to give me a call.” The guy said, giving Dean’s shoulder a slight pat before going into the car with his other three buddies.
Dean started to take out his gun just as the guy in the driver’s seat started the engine. Before he could fully take out his gun you were standing next to him, two boxes of pie in your hands and a slight look of worry on your face. “Can I shoot them?” He asked you. 
“Not in public.” You responded, handing him one of the boxes. “What did they say to you?” You were curious, and you had every right to be. Even though you were accustomed to Dean pulling out his gun, you were confused as to why he had wanted to pull it out in that moment, especially since you were pretty sure that the men in the car weren’t any kind of monsters.
“Nothing.” Dean was quick to respond, but his response sounded angry, almost hurt.
“It didn’t look like nothing. Especially since you asked if you could shoot them.” Dean handed you back the box of pie that you had just given him, causing you to give him an even more worried look.
“Can we just leave?” His voice was panicked now, maybe with a small hint of embarrassment.
“Yeah.” Was all you said as the two of you got into Baby.
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There was a strong silence between the two of you, and it wasn’t the comfortable kind like you were used to. That was one of the things that you had loved most about Dean; that you and him didn’t constantly need to fill the silence with talking. It was something that you enjoyed because your past boyfriends always needed to have some kind of conversation going because they hated the silence. “Y/N, can I ask you something?”
“Always.” You turned your attention to Dean.
“Am I…Am I old?” He asked. His eyes flicked in your direction and then back onto the road.
“Old?” You asked, not sure if you had heard him right. Him asking if he was old was something that had caught you off guard.
“Yeah. Am I old?” He repeated again.
“Did those guys back there say you were old Dean?” This conversation topic was something that Dean would have never brought up, not unless someone had specifically said something to him. The last time he had this conversation with you was because Claire had jokingly called him an Old Man.
“You didn’t answer the question.” Dean stated. You were positive that’s what it was.
“No. You’re not old Dean. I don’t even know why you would think that.” You knew why he would think that; you were pretty sure that the men back at the gas station had said something to him about it. But you didn’t know why they would have said something to him.
“Those guys back at the gas station called me…Old Man.” His voice sounded slightly defeated, like he was embarrassed even though he had no reason to be. “I caught those assholes looking at you, making comments.” He turned to face you for a slight moment before looking back at the road, his knuckles started to turn white as his grip tightened on the steering wheel. “They were trying to make a bet about who would be able to pick you up. When I confronted them about it, telling them that you were my girlfriend, that’s when they laughed and called me an old man.”
“Dean –” You began to say, but he cut you off before you could finish.
“Sweetheart, I know you could have handled that yourself. You have a black belt in three different martial arts and you don’t take any kind of shit from anyone. Hell, a part of me had wanted to see you embarrass the guy because I know for a fact that he isn’t your type but…he was your age.” He was your age. 
“Well, you’re not old. It’s not like you’re 90 Dean. You’re 42. That’s still young.” You stated, putting your hand on his thigh, a small gesture that you knew he loved. You had hoped that your comment would make him feel slightly better.
“I’m not young Sweetheart, you are. I got like 15 years on you.” His response made your face drop.
“That’s never been a problem for you before. I mean, it’s not like I’m 17 Dean, I’m three years shy of 30.” When you first met Dean, it was roughly five years ago when you were 22 and he was 37. Initially when you had first met him, you had figured that the two of you would be nothing more than just friends due to the semi-massive age difference that there was between the two of you, despite the fact that you did find him attractive. For the first couple of years that you knew him, you didn’t try to pursue anything; and neither did he, although the two of you had similar feelings. Dean had figured that you wouldn’t want to be with someone his age, and you thought that he didn’t want to be with someone your age. It wasn’t until Cas said something and both of you almost dying on a hunt that caused you two to realize that maybe you should give it a shot – and you’ve been together ever since.
“Exactly. You’re three years shy of 30. I’m far, far past that. You know what I was doing at 30? Trying to stop the Apocalypse. When I was 30, you were still in high school. You weren’t even on my radar back then.” 
“Would have been pretty good jailbait though.” You joked.
“Not funny.” He responded.
“I’m not laughing.” You said back.
“Can I ask you another question?” His knuckles were still white against the steering wheel. 
“Of course.” What else could you possibly say?
“Why me? Why out of all the guys you could possibly be with, that are your own age, that you actively choose to be with me? I mean, I know I drink too much, I have way, way too many screws loose, I’ve been to Hell, Purgatory, been possessed more times than I can count, I have major trust issues, PTSD.” He looked over at you again. “The list goes on and on. I’m all kinds of fucked up Sweetheart.” Your heart sank at Dean’s comments. You hated more than anything when he talked bad about himself, because there was no reason for him to do that. 
“Pull over.” Was all you said.
Dean looked at you with a confused expression. “What?”
“Did I stutter? I said pull over.” Your voice was stern now, but it made Dean pull over on the side of the road.
“Dean, the fact that you even have to ask me why I’m with you shows me that you don’t actually realize or understand the reasons why I love you. You’re right, I could be with someone my own age. But you know what? I don’t want to. I’ve dated people my age, and they honestly suck. Hunters or not, men my age or even a year or two older have no fucking clue what they want in life. The only thing they’re positive about is wanting to fuck anything that has a pulse and gaslight women.” You let out a frustrated sigh. “My parents used to tell me, ‘not all men,’ and I knew that. You may have a slight case of alcoholism –”
“A slight case?” Dean interrupted, raising an eyebrow. He thought you saying that he only had a slight case of alcoholism was a tad too generous.
You pointed a finger at him. “Don’t interrupt me.” Dean put up his hands in defeat. “As I was saying. You may have a slight case of alcoholism, are insanely prone to nightmares, get angry more often than you probably should, enjoy murder every now and then, have been to Hell and Purgatory and back, but wanna know something? I’ll take all of that, gladly! Because you are honestly the best man I could ever ask for. Yes, you have some flaws, but who doesn’t? I mean look at me for example.” You went into your jacket and pulled out your hunting knife. “I’m someone who brings a hunting knife wherever they go like it’s a security blanket. No normal person does that Dean.”
“As you should. You need to be prepared at a moments notice.” He agreed.
“Exactly! No sane person would agree with me.” You said, putting back your hunting knife.
“Y/N, are you saying that part of the reason you’re with me is because I’m not sane?” He raised an eyebrow. He’s been called crazy or insane more times than he could count, so this wasn’t particularly newsworthy for him.
“I was thinking more…cautious.” You shrugged. “I mean…No, cautious isn’t the right word. You are cautious but…” You were really trying to come up with the right word to tell Dean, and you could feel it on the tip of your tongue. “What I’m trying to say is, any other guy would be freaked the fuck out if they saw me walking around with a hunting knife in my jacket. You? You couldn’t give two fucks. And you wanna know something else? I’ve worked with a lot of hunters over the years before I met up with you and Sam, who just looked at me and laughed because of my age, thinking that I don’t know the difference between rock salt and holy water.” You took one of his hands in yours intertwining your fingers. “You, not including Sam of course, accepted me as someone that actually knows a thing or two about hunting despite my age. You treated me like your equal. Hunter or not.”
You treated me like your equal. Your words rang in Dean’s mind. “Of course I treat you like my equal Sweetheart. What man wouldn’t? ‘Sides those other hunters and the Jayhawks spirit squad back there.” He chuckled, and you let out a small laugh too.
“Exactly. You’re a feminist icon.” You smiled.
“A feminist icon uh? Who knew?” Dean finally smiled.
“In all seriousness, I could give a rat’s ass about your age. You treat me right and my parents love you. What else could I possibly ask for?” You gave his hand a slight squeeze as you shot him another smile, but a softer one this time.
“Still amazed that your parents love me.” He said, starting to lean in closer to you.
“You treat their daughter right. That’s all they care about.” You confessed. When you had first told your parents about Dean, one of the first things they asked is if he was treating you right, they never asked about his age. And when they had met him, they still never commented on that fact, even when he wasn’t in the room.
He caressed your face. “I really am lucky to have you.” He smiled and leaned in fully to kiss you. “I love you so much.”
You smiled. “I love you more.”
He let out a slight chuckle. “Show off.”
“Always.” You responded, leaning in to kiss him again.
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0mg-bird · 4 months ago
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Sunrise~ Tyler Owens x Fem! Reader
Summary: The curious case of the tornado wranglers, down to earth, girlfriend.
A/n: I just watched Twisters and am in love. Right now Sunrise by Ryan Bingham is my favorite song so here’s a little one shot inspired by it.
Warnings: Language, implied smut
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Everyone’s called you crazy ever since you were born. The people in your small Texas town said you were the wild child, your parents had four boys and when their baby girl came around, she had a mean streak just like her brothers. Ten years old and standing in an empty corn field, looking at the thunder heads forming above you, hot and muggy air gusting against your skin, the crack of thunder didn’t scare you, you were utterly curious and amazed. You’ve known storms since you were a babe, you remember the shrill sound of the sirens going off and your mama screaming for you to come inside. Your family was in a panic, you remember your daddy letting the horses loose and the way the cattle ran. That funnel touched down and prayers were prayed, you watched from the bathroom window despite the way your mama dragged you away.
It was beautiful, so utterly terrifying in the distance, a force of straight power.
You were hooked.
Telling your parents you were going to the University of Arkansas to study meteorology was a good idea in theory until they told you becoming a weather girl was a sweet job.
You told them about storm chasing and your mama almost had a stroke.
But you’ve worried everyone your whole life, only you would choose something so crazy.
You met Tyler your sophomore year when you had the same class, your energetic personality hid the fact you were a nerdy kind of cowgirl. The two of you quickly became best friends, despite his cocky personality. You formed a dare devil connection, you were the call he made when he got a lead on something.
Graduation came and you said you were going back home, he hated that idea.
“Come with me.” He said.
“Where?”
“Anywhere, everywhere.”
It’s hard to say no to a man with puppy dog eyes.
Somewhere between gathering a crew up from all over the boons and adopting a one eyed dog you found stranded after a storm in Little Rock, the two of you fell so deep for each other, it hit harder than any storm you experienced.
Here you are now in Oklahoma, cutting through fields in Tyler’s red Ram truck. “Lilly, talk to me.” You call over the radio system on the dash, looking for what data the girl in the vehicle following has. In the backseat, Boone, the right hand man, is recording like always, talking to the followers.
“Welcome back guys, we’re currently back at it again in the Oklahoma plains. This beauty we’re going into is gaining speed, turning into something good. What are we thinking, Tex?”
You look to the camera and smile. “You know, I’d like to call this an easy F2 but the strong updraft we’re getting here could push this baby into the F3 category.”
Also from the back seat, Ben, the London journalist asks to explain what you just said.
The rain cap starts and muddies the earth, the truck drifts as Tyler maneuvers it greatly. You pull your sunglasses off and lean forward to get a better look at what you’re driving into.
“What are you thinking, darlin’?” Tyler asks, seeing the way you evaluate the area.
“Take a left, it ain’t gonna hit the tree line, see the way the wind shifted?” You instruct.
“Yes ma’am.” He nods, giving you one of his perfect grins before making a sharp left.
Ben makes a sort of strangled cry of fear as he gets tossed around in the back. You, completely nonchalant, chewing on a Red Vine, turn to look at the Brit.
“Ben, baby, how you feeling back there?” You ask, pointing something else out to Tyler.
“Oh I’m bloody great.” He lies before getting knocked into the door again. You laugh. “Man, I love this guy.” You declare, finding him so amusing. “Let’s keep him, Ty.”
He rolls his eyes at you, making you scoff. You look at the dog in your lap who’s wearing a tiny helmet with the words ‘Killa’ written across the front. “What you think, Rocky? You wanna keep Ben?”
The dog lays his head down and places his paw over his small snout.
“Rude. Ty, Rock used to agree to everything I say, now you’ve done gone and brain washed him. Poor fella.” You pout before yelping in surprise at the way Tyler drifts into a spot. He grips the radio, calling for the convoy to assume their positions.
“Sorry, I’m no expert but it looks like the twister is going to roll right over us.” Ben says as everyone buckles their harnesses.
“You’re exactly right Benny boy.” You say, opening the center console and placing Rocky inside his designated safety seat. “We need to be in its path so the data bugs we’ll launch have enough wind speed to reach the height needed. Put your harness on and you’ll be about as secure as a pistol in a PTA Mama’s purse.”
Ben looks to Boone in question. Boone just shrugs. “At some point you get used to all the odd shit she says.”
Tyler cranks the E brake, then looks at you with a smirk. “You wanna touch my joystick?” He ask, motioning to the control stick that has the button to activate the drills that will anchor the truck into the ground.
“I love it when you talk dirty to me.” You scrunch your nose, pushing the button.
The truck is secured, you’re all buckled in tight, now you have to focus on when it’s the perfect time to launch the processors. Things are blowing against the windows, Tyler’s laughing and Boone is howling into the camera, showing the viewers what they see.
“Tell me when.” Tyler says, and as thick water drops pummel the windshield, you stay silent, waiting…watching.
“Now!” You shout and he presses the button that activates the hydraulic opening lid to the tub in the truck bed, the small bug sensors fly out and are carried up into the funnel that is passing over you.
“Breaker breaker, what are we seeing?” You call into the radio, Dexter in the caravan off in the clearing responds. “We got eyes, Tex. Data is coming in clear.”
You shoot your arms up in victory, this was the first time you were launching the 2.0 sensors. “There we go!” You look directly into the camera Boone is pointing at you. “You see that kids? I still got it.”
You watch the storm pass you, the funnel goes into the distance and the winds calm a bit as you unbuckle your harness. You’re pulling the pup from its safety and throwing open the door, running to the spot it just was.
“Whoo!” You hear Tyler whoop, and you throw that snapback hat of his you were wearing, adrenaline pumping through you. He sweeps you into his large arms, twirling you around. “Did you see that, baby? God, that was beautiful.” He laughs and you pull on the brim of his cowboy hat. “I sure did, let’s go get those bugs before we lose their signals, cowboy.”
Later as you set up camp in some cheap motel, Ben is approaching Lilly and Boone with questions.
“I need a story about the girl, uh Tex? Does she have a name?” He settles into one of the fold out chairs and motions to you sitting on the roof of the truck, looking up at the stars and listening to the music playing on the radio.
Lilly chuckles and then makes an adjustment to her drone. “She does, but she’d kill you if she found out you was using her government name in your fancy paper.”
Ben finds that interesting, he writes a few notes about a very mysterious persona you have. “How long has she been in this business? I tried to ask her some questions but she shushed me and told me she was ‘meditating to a Childers song’ and it was very important that she did this.”
Boone shakes his head. “She says confusing stuff to make people go away when she wants her peace.” He explains. “Tex is the original, her and T were the ones to assemble the squad of us, they taught me everything I know. She might be crazier than he is if I’m bein’ honest, always pushing the limits but every move she makes is calculated.”
Lilly agrees. “She’s my best friend, but has always been a curious case. She comes from Texas, hence the nickname and the accent that gets too thick when she’s drunk. Mama wanted her to be this Southern belle but she turned out to be a real wrangler. She’s the smartest person I know, but has a very relaxed way about her.”
“Who?” Dexter asks as he passes by.
“Tex.” They answer.
He shakes his head. “That girl’s a tree hugging loon.”
Ben quickly comes to know the dynamic of you and Tyler. There is no home but each other, you make the best of every situation because you are together. Two pairs of cowboy boots and wide eyes, that’s what you two are.
“I’d compare her to like…a coyote.” Lilly determines. “She’s the perfect balance of wisdom and foolishness, always willing to make light of situations. One time, we were tracking a desert storm in New Mexico and we were camping in our trucks, it was hot, all our leads were gone and we’re ready to turn back. The sunrise comes and it’s prettiest thing I ever seen, we wake up to just a color spill of orange and pink. We open our doors up and Tex is out there dancing in a sports bra and boxers.”
Boone leans back in his chair, laughing at the memory. “Man, we thought she finally lost it, that being with Tyler for so long finally made her go off the rails. T is standing there, watching her, asking what the hell she was doing and she claims she was doing a rain dance.” He says, making Ben chuckle to himself.
Lilly lights a cigarette and rolls her eyes. “She was out there shaking her ass.”
“You fucking joined her!” Boone argues, taking the cigarette from her.
“Well yeah, you don’t let your best friend dance alone. And what happened that day? The rain came and the biggest thunderheads I had ever seen blew in. The lightning was beautiful, Ben, you shoulda been there.”
New Mexico rain was a memory you thought of often, it just felt a little fresher. Blame it on the heat you were dying of or the thirsty land you stood on, but you stood out in it, getting soaked to the bone and then fell into Tyler’s arms.
Now, far away in Oklahoma, Tyler stands looking up at you soaking in the moonlight. “Come down from there.” He calls. You lean over the edge of the roof and look at him. “Why don’t you come up here?” You challenge.
Tyler shakes his head. “I’m tired, darlin’. Let me take you inside.”
You look back up at the stars, then slide from the top of the truck, making him reach out and catch you. “Alright, take me to bed you old man.”
He shakes his head at your comment. It’s hard to resist anymore, you just looked so gorgeous underneath the moonlight. He leans to kiss you, nothing too deep but still of passion because he loves tasting the sugar of your lips, you were always so sweet that it made his head cloudy.
Arm around your shoulders, yours around his waist, the two of you say goodnight to your friends and head to your motel room, Rocky trotting after you. The lock on the door is hard to budge open, the room has a sort of stale smell.
As Tyler is distracted by setting up a bed for the dog, you grab your things from your duffel. “Dibs in the bathroom.” You shout before making a run for it. Tyler groans and tries to beat you, but you stand in the doorway, sticking your tongue out at him. “You just gotta be faster.” You tease before shutting the door in his face.
The low bulb light casts a hazy orange glow to everything, you start the shower and find it to have weak water pressure. Your clothes make a pile on the floor and soon the air steams up.
Your muscles relax as you wash off, you let out a small groan at your fingers scrubbing your scalp. The sound of the shower curtain being pulled back and Tyler stepping in behind you makes you turn. “I haven’t even been in here that long.”
He shrugs, then moves to hog the water. “I got impatient.”
After being with someone for so long and sharing everything, nothing really fazes you. The crew jokes that you and Tyler could probably morph into one body at this point.
By the time the two of you are mostly rinsed off, he’s getting handsy. His fingers trace over your handful of tattoos, wet skin sliding across you in a feverish way. You lean your head back against his shoulder, looking up at him. “Ty…”
He looks down you was an innocent smile. “Oh come on, we’ve been traveling with people for too long. We get one night without Boone gagging when I kiss you.” He says, then leans his head down, nuzzling into your neck.
You bite your lip at the feeling, your arm coming up to run your hand through his hair. “Who’s in the room next to us? These walls are thin.”
“I don’t give a shit about that.” He mumbles, hand slipping far past your navel, earning a loud gasp from you.
You lean your weight back against him, nodding feverishly as his fingers do wonders to an aching spot between your legs. “Okay, not having Boone around is really good.” You breathe.
He’s practically holding you up, his other arm is around you, holding you to his chest while he makes you fall apart.
It didn’t matter that the room hasn’t been updated since the 80’s or that the mattress groaned under the weight of the two of you or that Rocky runs and hides, the two of you were savoring this alone time because you didn’t know when the next time would be when you got it.
You’re laughing, making out and switching positions. The feel of his hand running past the valley of your breasts and giving your throat the lightest grip, it makes you feel on fire. The headboard’s getting knocked into the wall, you’re breathlessly whining and he’s loving every reaction you give him. By the time you’re gripping his shoulders so tight and his name is sounding broken as it cuts from your throat, he’s barely holding himself up.
The air conditioning makes an odd hum sound as you lay against him, skin on skin. You never understood how people could get bored of sex after being with someone for a while, having sex with Tyler Owens was hotter than west Texas in the Summer.
Well, the first time was a little awkward. Most people don’t establish they love each other before they sleep with each other, but you guys did. When you sat in his lap, lips slotted against his, you had to fight to push the idea out of your mind that you were grinding against your best friend. Everything was slow and every touch was unsure, after it ended you were scared that the relationship dynamic would never work if this was how sex was together.
You laugh now, thinking about it.
“What’s so funny?” He asks, fingers tracing the long horn skull that is tramp stamped on you.
“I’m just remembering the first time we had sex.” You shake with amusement. He groans. “You have to stop bringing that up.”
Pushing up from his chest, the blanket falls off of you. He watches in amazement as you swing your leg over his waist, your hands planted on his chest. “I think it’s cute, we were just babies.”
“Yeah, sometimes I miss the days where I didn’t know how insane you were.”
You glare, immediately going to move off of him before his grip yanks you back to your spot.
“I’m kidding, I always knew you were crazy.” He says.
“You love it.” You lean over him, and his hand comes to tuck some of your hair behind your ear. “You know I do, darlin’.”
Falling asleep was easy, you could fall asleep anywhere, but in a bed with Tyler holding you to his chest, it had you dreaming in seconds. You wake before he does, slowly sliding away to get dressed. You stand at the balcony outside, a cup of coffee in your hand as you watch the sunrise. After a few moments of peace, the door behind you opens and out comes your lover boy.
“No rain dance this morning?” He asks, kissing the top of your head.
“There’s plenty of rain in Oklahoma, they don’t need me to shake my ass in the parking lot for it to come.” You state, leaning down to pick up Rocky who trailed out after Tyler.
The two- well, three of you, look out at the horizon line, the air is already getting hot.
“You ready?” He asks you, and you turn to kiss his jaw. “I’m always ready.”
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cameronspecial · 6 months ago
Note
Rafe and reader - enemies to lovers
Protective!rafe with innocent!reader
She asks her best friends brother for help when she’s in trouble!
Safe In The Arms Of The Enemy
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader
Warnings: Fear of Being Followed and Walking Home Drunk Alone
Pronouns: She/Her
Word Count: 1.2K
Masterlist
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Y/N and Sarah have been best friends for as long as she can remember. Even though Y/N is three years older, they met when she was nine and Sarah was six. The two of them just clicked and they have been thick as thieves ever since. This led to their families growing close together. The Camerons were always so nice to Y/N; everyone except for Rafe. For some reason, he has always been bothered by Y/N and she reciprocates that feeling because his hate provokes her.
The music in Sarah’s room blares through the speakers while Y/N stands in front of the mirror, singing along to “Stressed Out” by Twenty One Pilots. She is sleeping over at the Camerons' house to keep Sarah company. Ward, Rose and Wheezie are on the mainland for Wheezie’s spelling bee and Rafe is who knows where. The girls had grown peckish, so Sarah offered to get some pizza, leaving behind her best friend at Tannyhill by herself. “Wish we could turn back time. To the good old days. When our mama sang us to sleep, But now we're stressed out.” Her right hand forms an o as she uses it as a microphone. Her focus is on her own reflection, so she doesn’t notice Rafe’s appearance behind her. He leans against the door frame with his arm above his head. “Wow, you would think with how rich your parents are that they would pay for singing lessons for you after hearing you screech like a banshee,” he teases. 
Her eyes roll in their socket and she turns to face him. She fires back, “Like I care about your opinion. I’ve seen your tastes and I’m glad that I’m not up to your standards.” “Whatever,” he grumbles. “Obviously you are blind because I have amazing tastes.” 
“Nah, I’m not the problem. You are,” she pushes to infuriate him. She steps forward and they are face to face. He crouches down so their eyes meet, “I wish I was the one with the problem because then I wouldn’t have to deal with you. I swear every time I see you at my house, which is all the time, I wonder when you are going to get the fuck out of my life because I hate that you are in it.” 
His words don’t meet his eyes, but she doesn’t notice. Instead, her mind takes the words to heart. A poke attacks her heart and it causes a tsunami of blood to come out. She can’t explain why she takes the word to heart; she returns the sentiment. Nevertheless, maybe she doesn’t feel as strongly as he does because as much as she loathes him, she couldn’t imagine her life without their quipful exchanges. He sees her tight lips and her silent demeanour; guilt flashes through him.
Before he can try to resolve the situation, Sarah passes behind him with a steaming pizza in her hand. “Ugh. Rafe, leave her alone. I would like to eat in peace,” she complains, setting the flat box on her desk. His hand runs over his lips as he thinks. “Fine, I don’t care. Later losers.” 
———
The ending of summer means Rafe and Y/N have to return back to UNC. When she found out he was going to the same university as her (she should’ve seen it coming because Ward is an alumnus), she hesitated to accept her position; however, she figured uni was a big place and the chances of running into him were slim. It has been true for the most part. They’ve only run into each other five times in the two years they have been at university.
She stumbles through the dark street with her head pounding. It wasn’t the best idea to be walking home alone while drunk, except she didn’t want to make her friends go home early. She lied to them and told them another friend was picking her up. Her feet catch on the pavement and a rock skips across the ground. A car passing beside her causes her to jump away from the road. Her inebriated state makes her more paranoid. She lets out a breath when the taillights fade into the distance. Laughter coming from behind her causes her to spin around. She spots men walking in her direction and even though they don’t appear to be looking at her, panic sets through her. She begins to walk faster as her breathing starts to get faster and she decides to run into an alley to hide. Her first thought is to call to help, so she pulls out her phone and dials the first number that comes to mind. “What do you want?” he grunts through the phone. “Rafe, I’m scared. I don’t know what to d-” She hears footsteps coming closer to her and hangs up. A trash can seems like the perfect cover, so she drops behind it against the wall. 
Rafe sits up straight from the couch and stares at the phone. The screen showing that the call has been ended makes him grow anxious. He begins to pace as he tries her phone again. His hand runs through his hair while he replays the fear in her mind. He is sent to voicemail and wants to through his phone against the wall. Another thought comes to mind and he decides against it. 
———
She doesn’t know how long she has been behind the garbage with her head pressed against her legs. She is honestly too scared to move in case those men are still around. It didn’t look like they were following her, but it is better safe than sorry. The alcohol in her system starts to affect her state of consciousness and she struggles to keep her eyes open. A hand on her back causes her to scream and jump back. Her head hits against the brick wall. She grimaces as she brings her hand up to rub the back of her head. “It’s okay, Sweetheart. It’s me, Rafe.” The familiar voice makes her look up to verify his identity. 
She sees his mop of dirty blonde hair and his stunning blue eyes stare back at her. She has never been so happy to see him. Her arms wrap around him to pull him against her, “I was so scared. Are they still out there?” She surveys the street once they separate. His hand cups her cheek to check her for injuries; he isn’t concerned about their surroundings. “Sweetheart, there is no one around. Are you okay? Are you hurt? Did someone do something to you?” He frowns at the last part, following her search with a hard expression to find the person he has to defend her against. She doesn’t find anyone and her shoulder drops in his hold. Her head rests against his chest. Tears begin staining his shirt. His hand laces between the hair at the nape of her neck and he gently scratches her scalp. He knows it soothes her. He kisses her forehead, “I’ve got you. You are safe.” For the first time tonight, Y/N feels safe and she is in the arms of her enemy.
Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @thepatriarchykeychain @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover @forstarkey @loving-and-dreaming @magicalyoura @rubixgsworld
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thepixelelf · 8 months ago
Text
and the universe said,
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07 - "bro, chill"
genres/tags: soulmate au, idol au, comedy, romance, dumbassery relationship(s): ot13 x reader chapter warnings: coarse language. kithing. a liiitle svt on svt violence note: ik it's been a long time please be nice to me <3 (this isn't edited... I'll take a look at it when I have the time)
When soulmates are suddenly thrust upon the world, you are one in a million who wishes they weren’t – and that’s before you meet the person (people?!) making your life much harder than it needs to be. And before someone asks you to sign an NDA.
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prev ⭒ chapter seven (4.0k) ⭒ next
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“Where are they?” Myungjun asks as soon as Jihoon and Junhui enter the room they agreed upon.
Junhui braces both of his arms on the back of a chair. “What do you mean?”
“Your soulmate—” Cutting himself off with a sigh, Myungjun pinches the bridge of his nose and answers his own question. “You didn’t bring them.”
Yejung, who was sitting at a table with her laptop, shuts it with a frown. “Why not?”
Junhui shrugs. “I’m just here because Jihoon dragged me out.” He shifts between looking at the three other people in the room. “You guys know I just met my soulmate, right? I don’t like not having them here with me, either.”
“Well then why didn’t you—”
“They don’t know.” Jihoon cuts off Myungjun’s words, then pulls out a chair and drops himself in it. He stares at a random spot on the table. When he doesn’t elaborate any further, Yejung sends a furtive glance Myungjun’s way.
“Don’t know…” She leans her forearms on the table and scoots her chair closer. “...what? That you’re their soulmate? That there’s more than one of you? That you’re famous?”
Junhui snorts. “All of the above?”
At Junhui's quip and Jihoon's continued silence, Myungjun raises a cynical brow.
"You didn't tell them?" Yejung asks, softly shocked. "Why?"
Junhui's eyes skirt to Jihoon; he's unwilling to share his own reasons, though he doesn't quite understand this about himself, either.
Jihoon sighs. "I don't know. It's complicated. Things happened too fast the first time we—"
"The first time?" Myungjun echoes. "So you've been with them multiple times."
“Don’t say it like that.” Jihoon almost pouts, but the facial expression just makes him look angry. “Look. I ran into them when the vocal team was on the way to that radio show. We’d stopped by a cafe and there wasn’t much time and I was so out of my mind that I—” He cuts himself off. “It doesn’t matter. I got their number, and then they left. I asked to meet today and we did. Jun was already there for…” With his arms crossed, Jihoon looks over at Junhui, remembering that he still doesn’t really know what Junhui was doing at the same cafe you apparently frequent. Is this the same cat cafe Junhui is always talking about? “…some reason. Then someone started singing, and they told us their soulmate is stupid and annoying because their mark…”
“It’s not like ours,” Junhui finishes for Jihoon, though this only deepens the confusion written on Yejung and Myungjun’s faces.
“If it's not like yours, then how do you know they're your—”
“It's them, Hyung.” Jihoon can't help noticing the hopelessness in his own voice. It's you. He knows it's you.
But you don't know it's them— him.
And he's not sure you want to know.
“Their mark, like, grows,” Junhui explains. “Ours just stay on our hands, but when one of us sings, the notes go all over their arms and neck. Maybe other places — I don’t know — but they obviously don’t think it’s either of us since we weren’t singing when their mark did its thing.”
“So…” Myungjun crosses his arms and taps his finger on his bicep. “They don't like their mark.”
Junhui doesn't nod right away, but he does eventually.
Myungjun turns to Jihoon. “And you think that means they don't like you.”
Groaning and rubbing his hands over his face, Jihoon doesn't dignify that with a response. “Even if they did like their mark, it’s an insane situation. Thirteen soulmates? They’re gonna run for the hills when they find out.”
“That’s not necessarily true,” Yejung says, to which Jihoon gives her a dry look and Junhui’s eyes light up. She clears her throat. “We just need to find a way to calmly inform them of the situation — preferably in a safe, comfortable environment.”
Myungjun recognizes a Yejung Game Plan brewing when he sees it. “Basically, what she’s saying is…”
“Let me talk to them.” Yejung opens her laptop again and begins typing away. “We just need to go about this in a calm, logical manner.” She gives a little nonchalant wave of her hand. “This’ll be easier than a design meeting.”
You’re sitting on the floor of your apartment, arms crossed, legs too, as you stare down at the shiny black credit card lying there between you and Heejun. His position mirrors yours, head tilted while he studies the card.
“It could be fake,” you say. Your knee bounces up and down, up and down.
Heejun lifts his head to give you a look. “Why would it be fake?”
“He said he doesn’t believe in banks.”
“It doesn’t look fake.” Heejun reaches out and takes the card, flipping it over in his fingers to read the back. “Looks like any other credit card. We should test it.”
You frown. “How?”
“Uh,” Heejun speaks like the answer is obvious. “Buy something?”
Okay, it is obvious, but the idea doesn’t sit too well with you. “Isn’t that stealing?”
“He gave you the card.”
“Yeah, but the police don’t know that,” you argue. “If I got charged for fraud, it would be his word against mine— no one would believe coffee guy just handed me his black card.”
Without moving his head, Heejun glances up from the card to look at you. "Why would he lie?"
"Um, because he already has? Who knows— maybe this card is connected to illicit activities and he planted it on me to implicate me."
“Which he would do because…?”
You throw your hands up in the air, then let them drop emphatically at your side. “I don’t know! Why did he do any of what he did?”
He raises a brow. “Because he’s a weirdo who likes you?”
“Okay but have you ever given your credit card to a person you’ve only met twice?”
Heejun’s shoulders rise in a shrug. “I’ve wanted to.”
“Seriously?” You can’t imagine your friend going that gaga over a crush, but then again, there was that girl in fourth grade whom he gave all his choco pies to. Heejun loves choco pies.
“Mine would decline though. It wouldn’t exactly impress.”
You lightly shove his shoulder. “Oh come on, it wouldn’t decline.”
“It would if they went over the limit. People only give people their credit cards for expensive stuff. You know that, right?”
The black card gleams up at you, almost tauntingly.
“Expensive stuff like what?”
He shrugs again. “Like a car?”
“You’ve been watching too many CEO dramas.” You exhale and place both hands on the floor with a pointed slam. Standing, you pick the credit card up and brush imaginary dirt off your pants.
“You won’t be so sarcastic when Park Seojoon tells you to keep that thing.”
You roll your eyes as you toss the card into the same trinket dish you keep your keys and other miscellaneous things in. “Isn’t that guy like six foot?”
“So was Huijun,” he counters.
“So are you. Is that all it takes to be a CEO nowadays?” you joke, pulling out your phone. “Height?”
Heejun scoffs, then frames his chin with his thumb and forefinger. “That and my devilish good looks.”
“Please.” You tap on a notification from an unknown number. “If that were true, you’d be the one handing out black…cards…”
At the way you trail off, Heejun furrows his brow and walks over to you. “What’s up? Did you fall for another online scam?”
Not this again. “Okay, first of all, that was not a scam, and I did not fall for it—”
“You didn’t fall for a not scam?”
“Shut up. What do you think this means?” You turn your phone towards him, and he takes it from your unsteady hand.
He reads aloud. “‘Hello, this is Shin Yejung of Pledis Entertainment.’ Did you apply there?”
“No,” you say, then shake your head and wave your hand. “I mean. I don’t know. Maybe. I applied to like five hundred places. But this isn’t that. Keep reading.”
Heejun takes a breath and starts reading like he’s holding a new edict. “‘It has come to my attention that you are in possession of one of my coworker’s bank cards.’ Oooooh, you’re in trouble.” He drags out the last syllable. “‘Please meet me at…’ whatever building, numbers numbers numbers… ‘so I can retrieve it. Please reply to this number for more information, and thank you for your time.’ Hm.”
“What do you think… am I getting arrested?”
Lowering your phone, Heejun gives you a seriously? look over it. “The cops are texting criminals now?”
“So you agree I’m a criminal.”
“You get annoying when you’re nervous, you know that?” When you roll your eyes, Heejun mirrors the expression and pokes your forehead long enough that he pushes you backward. “Look bub, you wanted to give the stupid thing back without using it, and now the opportunity has been handed right to you.” He waves your phone in the air like evidence. “The only question is why coffee guy didn’t just text you himself.”
You cross your arms. “Maybe he doesn’t like me as much as you thought.”
“One more self-deprecating comment out of you and I’m posting those pictures from your twentieth birthday.”
A gasp wrenches from your throat. “You wouldn’t!”
Joshua Hong doesn’t think he has that many unread messages on his phone.
He looks down.
Oof. 682.
Well, it’s not his worst.
Notifications fly by at the top of his screen.
[vernon] where is this guy
[chan] hyung this is important!!
[wonwoo] when have we known that guy to answer anything
[soonyoung] someone text yejung!!
It’s probably not that important, whoever they’re talking about. His members are likely just freaking out over this whole soulmate thing again.
Joshua lifts his hand and stares at his weird, natural — supernatural — tattoo. He still can’t bring himself to believe it.
Soulmates? Really? In this economy? This isn’t Tumblr.
At least… Joshua looks around the dance practice room… He’s pretty sure this isn’t Tumblr.
His phone rings, which is weird since he always has it on silent. Sliding the answer button, he brings the phone up to his ear. “Yejung?”
“Where are you?”
“The practice room,” Joshua answers plainly. “Isn’t this where we’re supposed to be today?”
Yejung sighs on the other end of the line. “I said in the group chat that we were dealing with soulmate stuff. Upstairs.”
Ah, so that’s what has everyone in a tizzy. “Alright, okay. Where am I going?”
“Room eight-thirteen—” He hangs up and starts to pack his things before Yejung can say, “Wait, no, nine-thirteen. We'll start when you arrive. Joshua? Hello?”
You check your phone for what must be upwards of the fifth time.
Yup, Shin Yejung of Pledis Entertainment definitely told you to meet her in room 813, and yet here you are. In room 813. Alone.
You shift on the leather couch. It’s a lounge-like room you’re in. You don’t really understand the purpose of such a room in an entertainment company, but whatever. You’re only here to return something you never should’ve had in the first place.
Although…
You turn the card over in your hand, watching the way the fancy lighting bounces off of it.
Why would Jihoon give it to you if he was just going to get it back like this?
Also, now that you really think about it, Jihoon did say something weird when he left yesterday with Huijun. Something about not letting “the rest” scare you off. Whatever that means.
The rest of what?
Or… whom?
You know Jihoon must work for the company in some capacity. The fact that both he and Huijun were wearing masks makes you think they could be artists…
Oh. Duh. Why didn’t you think of this earlier?
Switching apps, you tap the search bar and start typing. Just as you’re done with the last character of Jihoon HYBE, the door you entered through opens. You hastily slip your phone into your back pocket as you stand to greet the person coming in.
“Hello, you must be…” Your eyes scan over his face. He’s… delicate looking, until you move your gaze downwards a little, and his broad shoulders and thick arms are decidedly not delicate looking. “…Shin Yejung?”
You tilt your head. With no mask on the lower half of his face, he seems familiar. Now this guy must be an idol — you probably saw him on the walls when you were making your way through this maze of a building. 
He just raises a brow. “Who are you?”
“Oh, uh…” You stay standing in front of the couch as he approaches you, his arms crossed over his chest. “I’m just here to return this.” Lifting the black card up, you hold it out between you and the man. “It’s Jihoon’s.”
“Jihoon’s?” he echoes, then moves to take the card from you, pinched between his thumb and forefinger. 
You both see it at the same time.
His mark, five black lines, clear as day.
Yours, peeking out from where your sleeve is pulled halfway up your hand.
You look up from your not-really-joined hands, then look down again.
No fucking way. 
“Twinkle twinkle, little—” The notes, whatever they are, dance across his mark.
No fucking way. 
You meet his eyes. “...Songbird?”
He doesn’t say anything for a few seconds. A few too many seconds.
Then, “So it’s you.”
“Holy—!”
At the same time as you try to jerk away, he attempts to turn your hand over and get a better look. Neither plan really works out. You stumble backwards, and with your hand in his, he gets pulled down with you onto the couch. His free hand shoots out to keep himself from slamming into you, but, persistent as the universe is, your faces end up very freaking close to each other anyway. Warmth from his knee on the couch cushion next to your thigh seeps through your clothing.
He doesn’t move. You don’t either.
For some reason, you feel stuck in place. Not in a bad way, necessarily, but… you just feel like you should be exactly where you are.
You’re almost too close to make real eye contact, so you just watch the way his eyes study yours.
“Songbird?” you whisper, though you have no idea what you’re trying to ask.
He stops analyzing you and finally looks at you. “Yeah?”
“…Are you leaning towards me on purpose?”
His lips (since when were you looking at those?) curl down at the corners. “Are you?”
Slowly, like your mind is trying to catch up to your body, you shake your head. “No…”
He drifts closer. Or you do. Or you both do.
Or something.
Your lips brush over his, and you feel just as much as you hear him whisper. “Then neither am I.”
In the span of a second, his free hand moves from the back of the couch to cradle your jaw, his thumb grazing gently just under your ear. He kisses you, lips moving over yours in a way you’ve felt before, but also in a way you’ve never felt before.
It’s strange.
Not bad strange, but strange in the way that it feels like you’ve just put the last of the groceries in the fridge. It’s like folding that final piece of laundry. Like coming home to the bed you made when you left in the morning.
It’s… satisfactory?
But that’s not the word people normally use when they think of putting their tongue in someone else’s mouth, right?
You’re running out of breath, but Songbird is insistent, and so are his lips, which you find yourself unable to get enough of. He pulls back for half a breath, registers your kiss me again or so help me facial expression, and dives right back in. He’s kissing you and you’re kissing him and you’re soulmates and…
Wait.
Soulmates?
“Wait,” you say, though it comes out more like, “Mmaem” Climbing both your hands up his — whoa — strong arms, you cup his cheeks in preparation to push him away, but he seems to like your touch. He covers the back of one of your hands with his warm palm, and he hums in a way that is not PG-13.
The sound has you melting, unfortunately.
Not for long though.
He’s ripped from you just as quickly as he fell onto you, pulled back by some guy with fluffy black hair, cozy attire head to toe, and… shit, a you’re in trouble glare the likes of which you’ve never seen before. He’s not even looking at you, yet you feel scolded.
“Yah!” he yells at your soulmate, who’s now on the floor. Then, after glancing at you for half a second and apparently finding zero more words to say, he shouts at him again. “Yah!”
Your soulmate opens his mouth, but then he turns to look at the now-open door, which leads you to do the same. A mob of prettyboys stands just outside, some with their jaws dropped and some looking like murder just got legalized and they’re on the prowl.
Someone’s despondent voice shouts, “Hyung!”
You feel like hiding under a blanket. Before your flight instinct kicks in, though, you recognize two familiar faces. “Jihoon?” His eyes meet yours when you say his name. “Huijun?”
One of the many boys among those you don't recognize echoes, “Huijun?” while sending him a weird look.
Someone pushes through the crowd — more like slinks through, occasionally nudging one of the other guys out of the way. His eyes stay firmly on you as he approaches, but you find no fear rising despite that. For some unknown reason, even as this completely unfamiliar man strides over to you with a frankly alarming amount of eye contact, you feel… safe.
Or at least, something close to it.
He kneels in front of where you're still seated on the leather couch, hand resting mere centimetres from leg. “Are you okay?” he asks, voice slightly nasal, but so, so gentle. 
“Uhh…” Self conscious, you wipe at the corner of your mouth with your sleeve. You spot your soulmate catch you doing so, and a look of hurt crosses his face. His own reaction, though, seems to startle him, and his hand rises to gently prod his shiny bottom lip with one of his fingers. He looks confused.
Well, that makes two of you.
Taking in the man right in front of you — pretty, lithe, concerned for you despite his unfamiliarity — you fail to answer his question. “Are… you Shin Yejung?”
He lets out a laugh, relieved, maybe, that you're not not okay. “Jeonghan,” he says simply.
You nod. “Jeonghan.”
At your voice echoing his name, the man’s eyes light up. “Yes?”
“Oh, uh…” You weren’t trying to call on him for anything, but as you study his gaze, you find yourself lost in his confident ease. Something in his eyes says that he knew this would happen.
Maybe not this, exactly — your soulmate has found a spot on the floor and has not stopped staring at it, while the rest of the strangers are still watching you — but taking up the same space as you, facing you, smiling at you with a soft quirk at the corners of his lips.
“Ugh!” A woman’s exasperated voice makes you look up at the crowd by the door. “Get— out of the way, you… ugh—” She breaks through, pushing aside a tall guy who looks like he’s about to cry. “—you men!”
Stumbling to her feet, she rights herself and brushes her bangs out of her face with a huff. “Now, what is—” She spots your soulmate still on his ass and mutters something you’re pretty sure can’t be aired on any broadcasting network. “...my life.”
Your eyes meet hers as she takes another breath. “Please tell me you’re Shin Yejung.”
“Yes, we spoke over the phone.”
“Thank god.” Shaking off all the weird feelings you’d accumulated in the last — what? Two minutes? — you stand from the couch and sidestep Jeonghan. The black card fell at some point during that lapse of judgement (aka kiss), so you swipe it up off the floor and hold it out to her with no preamble. “I swear I’m not a stalker fan or anything. And I didn’t use it, so…”
You glance over at Jihoon, whose expression gives off an oncoming panic. Is he scared to see you? Why? Huijun looks just fine, happy even, with you here. You can practically hear the ‘hello’ he wants to say out loud.
You clear your throat. “Anyway, um. I didn’t mean to, uh…” As you nervously cross your arms, you nod towards your soulmate. “I’m his— I mean, we are… sorry. This is… I wasn’t exactly expecting to find the person who’s…”
Maybe you shouldn’t say you’ve been annoyed by your soulmate since you got your stupid mark. At least not while he’s in the room.
“That’s actually what I brought you here to talk about,” Shin Yejung tells you, a bit like a doctor who’s about to deliver the bad news first. She doesn’t even take the card from you. “Would you like to take a seat?”
You scrunch your eyes shut for a second with a little shake of your head, trying to manual reset your brain because clearly it’s still muddled. “Sorry, what? You want to talk about…?”
The mob of men in the room get hidden from your vision as Yejung strategically places herself between them and you. “Soulmates,” she says.
You look down at the black card, then back up at her again. “Soulmates.”
“Yes. Your soulmates. I was hoping to talk to you alone first.” She sends a pointed look at the men behind her. “But it’s not exactly easy to get these guys to lis—”
“Sorry.” You wave a hand in the air to get her to stop, unable to comprehend any of her words after— “Did you say my soulmates? As in… mates, multiple? Mates with an S at the end? I don’t think I heard you correctly.”
Remaining calm while your mind spins, Yejung nods. “I know this is a lot to take in.”
“Know what is a lot to take in?”
Yejung opens her mouth to answer, but a voice blurts out behind her, “We’re your soulmates!”
Maybe you haven’t known him long enough or talked to him that many times, but you recognize Jihoon’s voice, and something in your gut suddenly grows sharp. Not painful, but begging for you to feel it. Yejung shifts so your field of view is once again filled by men too pretty to be all in the same room. Jihoon’s standing there, fists clenched at his sides, out of breath for no discernable reason other than…
We’re your soulmates.
Seeing your hesitation, Jihoon huffs and tears a bandaid you never really noticed off the back of his right hand. Even before he completes the motion, you know what must be under the bandage. He holds his hand up, though, and the evidence is very near damning.
Next to him, Huijun smiles and lifts his arm, pointing to his own five lines with his opposite hand. 
Most of the guys behind them show you the same thing. Five lines on the smooth backs of their hands, near the base of the thumb. Dear lord, you don’t even know how many of them there are.
The angry one who pulled the man off of you earlier, at least, just looks lost, like he once had control and now has none. Relatable.
You stumble back a bit. Instinctively, you say, “Songbird?”
Though quite a few of the men seem to perk up at the nickname, only the one you already gave the moniker to truly reacts. Your soulmate — god, one of your soulmates? — looks up at you from the floor and answers, “Yeah?” before realizing he’s even doing it.
“Never mind,” you dismiss with a wave of your hand. “Ms Shin?”
“Yes?” She steps closer, a worried look on her face.
Jeonghan, too, moves toward you with a similar look on his face.
You try to take a steady breath and fail. “I think I’ll take that seat now.”
Swaying backward, your body falls onto the leather couch. 
You hear approximately ten panicked shouts as you go down.
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prev ⭒ chapter seven (4.0k) ⭒ next
new chapters for atus are not on a schedule nor guaranteed. there is no taglist. thank you for reading!
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be4chywritez · 1 month ago
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Afterglow | oscar piastri
oscar piastri x roommate!reader
you have a big fat crush on your roommate
request: heyyy, can u do oscar or lando or max w 28 and 36?
prompts: “accidentally” locking other out. (they’re roommates.), and "Quit smiling at me, I can't stop messing up my sentences when you look at me like that."
beachy’s masterlist🐚
prompt list🐚
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If you had told your thirteen-year-old self that your best friend’s really cute brother would one day be your roommate, she would have absolutely lost it.
But life works in mysterious ways. Oscar had always been a point of interest in your life—not just because you were next-door neighbors, but because you’d been close with his sisters. You were a year older than Hattie, and the two of you got along splendidly.
As university discussions became more frequent, you decided to take a leap, applying to the International University of Monaco. To your surprise, you got in. At seventeen, you packed your bags, said goodbye to the only home you’d ever known, and headed for a new life by the Mediterranean.
Leaving meant parting with your friends, your family, the Piastris—your second family—and the boy you’d secretly been in love with since you were thirteen.
Fast forward to 2023. You’re twenty-two, settled into an amazing job, and living comfortably in your lavish Monaco apartment. Your connection to home hasn’t faded—you still have regular calls with your parents and close friends.
During one of your weekly catch-ups, Hattie mentions that Oscar’s made it to Formula 1. You couldn’t be prouder. You remember her talking endlessly about his journey through F3, and you have no doubt that now, with him in F1, she won’t stop anytime soon.
After hanging up, you return to sketching prototypes for work, the details pulling you back in. So much so, you nearly miss the chime of your phone—nearly.
Glancing down, your heart skips a beat. It’s Oscar.
Hey, can I call you for a sec?
You hesitate for just a moment before typing back a quick Sure and setting your sketchbook aside.
Seconds later, your phone rings, and when you answer, the familiar sound of his voice sends a ripple of nervous energy through you. “Hey, long time no talk,” Oscar greets, his tone easygoing as always.
You clear your throat, trying to sound normal. “Yeah, it’s been a while. How’s everything going with you?”
“Busy, as usual,” he chuckles softly, and you find yourself fidgeting, your fingers lightly tapping against the sketchbook in your lap. His voice has always done this to you—made it hard to focus, made it hard to breathe, if you were being honest.
“Yeah, I can imagine,” you reply, trying to keep your voice steady. You’d known him for years, but now, with him on the line, your thoughts scatter. There’s a beat of silence before you speak again. “Hattie told me you got into Formula 1. That’s amazing, Oscar.”
“Thanks,” he says, and you can hear the smile in his voice. “It’s been pretty surreal.”
There’s another pause, a moment where you think the small talk is winding down, and you brace yourself for the inevitable goodbye. But instead, Oscar clears his throat. “Actually… I wanted to ask you something.”
You shift in your seat, nerves buzzing under your skin. “Sure, what’s up?”
“So, I’m moving to Monaco soon,” he starts, and the mention of Monaco—your Monaco—makes your heart skip again. “I was wondering… Would it be okay if I stayed with you for a bit? Just until I find a place of my own?”
Your breath catches, and you sit up straighter. Rooming with Oscar? The idea alone sends a jolt of panic and excitement through you. You’re quiet for a moment too long, and Oscar’s voice cuts through the silence.
“If it’s too much trouble, no worries. I can figure something else out.”
“No, no!” you rush out, maybe a little too quickly. “It’s fine, I mean—yeah, you can stay with me. It’s no trouble at all.”
The words leave your mouth before you can fully process what you’re agreeing to. The thought of sharing your space with him, being around him constantly, sends your mind spinning. But you can’t bring yourself to say no. Not to Oscar.
“Thanks, I really appreciate it,” he says, his voice light again, like the weight of the request is off his shoulders. “It’ll just be for a little while.
“Yeah, no worries,” you repeat, though inside, you’re anything but calm.
You hang up a few minutes later after more polite exchanges, but as you set your phone down, the reality of what you just agreed to hits you like a wave. Oscar Piastri, the boy you’d been in love with since you were a teenager, was going to be living with you.
And there’s no way you’re going to survive this unscathed.
That was a year ago.
Oscar hasn’t left as he promised. Not that you’re complaining—you like having his company, and you’d say he enjoys yours as well. But you weren’t going to lie: your crush on Oscar hadn’t faded. If anything, it had grown, expanding until it was something you could no longer ignore.
You’d gotten better at hiding it, of course. But there were moments—little, fleeting moments—when you’d catch yourself staring at him too long or feeling a spark when his hand brushed yours. And those moments? They were dangerous.
Living with him had brought its own routines, little traditions that had become your favorite parts of the week. Like Tuesday movie nights. It had started casually—something to fill the time—but now it was your unspoken ritual. The only complication was when Oscar was away for races, but even then, he’d FaceTime you, watching the movie along with you through the screen.
Tuesday movie nights had become a guilty pleasure, though you’d never admit it. You told yourself it was just because of the routine, but deep down, you knew it was because of him. The way he would sit close enough for your arms to touch, the way his laugh made your chest tighten. It was torture, and yet, you craved it every time.
And then there was the way he looked at you—so casual, so unbothered. He had no idea, did he? No idea how your heart raced every time he smiled at you or how the sound of his voice made you forget everything else.
You often wondered if Oscar noticed—if he could feel the tension simmering between you, or if he was just blissfully unaware. Sometimes, you thought you caught him looking at you a little too long, or that his teasing smile held something more. But you never let yourself hope too much. Not when he seemed so completely, utterly unaware of the effect he had on you.
And so, you kept pretending. Pretending that your feelings were buried, that living with Oscar was perfectly normal. But every day, it became harder to ignore the truth: you were still in love with him, and no amount of time or distance could change that.
It was another Tuesday night. Oscar got home earlier than usual, greeting you with a tired smile that made your heart do an inconvenient little flip. You felt oddly underdressed as he looked at you, even though you were in the comfort of your own apartment—cozy sweats and a tank top, nothing out of the ordinary. But something about the way his eyes lingered made your skin feel too warm.
You tried to shake it off, busying yourself by pulling out snacks from the cupboard for movie night. The crinkle of the chip bags was enough of a distraction—until Oscar walked back into the kitchen, out of his workout clothes and now wearing jeans and a simple white t-shirt.
You raised an eyebrow. Jeans? For movie night?
“So, I know it’s movie night,” he began, leaning against the counter, his hands gripping the granite. You watched the way his fingers flexed on the stone, trying not to think too much about how good he looked—like you hadn’t seen him in casual clothes a hundred times before.
“Yeah?” you prompted, waiting for him to continue. When he didn’t, you glanced up to find him already staring at you. His gaze was soft, but it sent a nervous flutter through your chest.
He rubbed the back of his neck, ruffling his hair. “Meredith from PR asked if I wanted to go for drinks.”
The words hit you like a punch to the gut, but you forced your face to stay neutral. You knew you shouldn’t feel this way—shouldn’t feel the sudden green wave of jealousy swirling in your stomach—but there it was.
“Oh,” you managed, shrugging like it didn’t matter. “Yeah, I get it. We don’t have to do movie night.”
Oscar’s lips curved into a small pout, and you had to look away because, God, that look was going to be the death of you. “I know you want to do movie night,” he muttered, almost as if he didn’t want to disappoint you.
You kept your eyes on the snack bags, pretending they were the most fascinating thing in the world. “It’s fine,” you said, though your voice was quieter than you intended. “You should go. It���s no big deal.”
There was a brief silence, one that stretched just a little too long for your liking. “Can we do movie night when I get back?” Oscar asked, and the hopeful tone in his voice made it impossible for you to say no.
You hesitated for just a second, your heart already betraying you. “Yeah, sure. What time will you be back?”
“Ten,” he said, and you nodded, already telling yourself that it was fine. You’d fill the time with work. That project needed attention, anyway.
Oscar smiled again, this time a little more relaxed, as grabbed his car keys and wallet. “I’ll see you later, then,” he said, heading for the door.
You forced yourself to smile back. “Yeah, see you later.”
As the door closed behind him, the apartment suddenly felt too quiet. You stood there for a moment, staring at the empty space where he’d been, and tried to push down the uncomfortable knot of jealousy twisting in your stomach. You shouldn’t care this much. He was just your roommate. Just Oscar.
But the pang in your chest told you otherwise.
You tried to shake off the unease, focusing on your project instead. Time passed in a blur of work until you wrapped things up around 9:30. Twenty minutes to spare.
You leaned back, glancing at the clock and then at your reflection in the nearby window. Before you could stop yourself, you found yourself reaching for your makeup bag. Just a little—subtle mascara, a swipe of lip gloss. You told yourself it was because you were bored. But deep down, you knew the truth: you wanted Oscar to see you.
A glance at the clock.
9:48.
You padded into the kitchen, rummaging through the snack cupboard once again. You pulled out some of Oscar’s favorites—chips, biscuits, a pack of his beloved Tim Tams. You reached to the back of the cupboard, fingers grazing the last pack of Tim Tams, and popped a bag of popcorn in the microwave.
The machine hummed as the kernels popped, the comforting sound filling the silence. You found yourself glancing at the clock again.
9:59.
The popcorn was done. You set it on the counter to cool slightly, and grabbed a few blankets from the couch, arranging them neatly. Tonight was your turn to pick the movie, and you had already decided on La La Land. A few sparkling waters from your last grocery run sat ready on the table.
And then you waited.
You sat on the couch, scrolling through Instagram to pass the time. The soft glow of your phone lit up your face, but the anticipation thrummed beneath your skin, distracting you.
10:15.
Your popcorn was cold.
10:25.
Condensation from the sparkling waters was beginning to leave small rings on the coffee table, pooling at the base of the cans.
10:30.
You sighed, the weight of disappointment settling over you. The TV screen remained frozen on the movie selection screen, your remote still in hand. With a frustrated click, you powered it off and got to your feet. Slowly, you folded the throw blankets, placing them back where they belonged. The cold popcorn went straight into the trash.
Sitting back down on the couch, you stared at the wall for a long moment, a heavy feeling growing in your chest. Why were you waiting for him? Why did it hurt so much?
In a snap decision, you stood up and walked to the front door. You pulled it open, crouching down to check beneath the mat for the spare key. Your fingers closed around it, and you slipped it into your pocket.
Oscar never bothered to take his apartment keys when you were home, always joking about how you had “Oscar tingles”—how you’d somehow know exactly when he was coming home and be ready to open the door. It wasn’t tingles at all, though. You just… waited for him.
Except tonight, you weren’t going to wait anymore.
After locking Oscar out, you settle on the couch, arms crossed tightly, trying to ignore the guilt creeping in. Sure, locking him out might have been petty, but he deserved a little consequence for coming home late. Still, your phone buzzes again—his name flashing on the screen.
“You locked me out.”
You bite the inside of your cheek, debating whether to reply. After a beat, you type:
“Oops. Thought you had your keys.”
“I didn’t take them because you’re always here.”
You hesitate, knowing you can’t leave him out there forever. Letting out a sigh, you slowly rise, dragging your feet toward the door. When you open it, Oscar is standing there, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, looking at you with that familiar easy smile.
He doesn’t seem irritated at all. In fact, he’s grinning like this whole thing is some kind of joke.
“Took you long enough,” he says, stepping past you with a shrug. “I was starting to think you’d make me sleep in the hall.”
You force a smirk, stepping aside. “Maybe you would’ve learned something out there.”
As he walks by, you notice his shirt—rumpled, his collar slightly crooked. Then, you see it: a faint smudge of lipstick near the edge of his neck. Your stomach drops, but you swallow down the sting, forcing yourself to play it cool.
Oscar heads for the couch, oblivious as always, and stretches out comfortably. You stay near the doorway, arms crossed, your gaze flicking over him as you try to keep your voice light.
“Rough night, huh?” you ask, eyes lingering on his collar and the mark on his neck.
Oscar frowns a little, looking down at his shirt before brushing at the smudge casually. “Yeah, I guess I wasn’t paying attention. Meredith’s friends get a little… enthusiastic when they’re drinking.” He chuckles, seemingly unaware of the effect his words have on you.
You force a smile, your voice sharper than you mean. “Clearly.” You gesture vaguely at his collar. “Looks like someone really went for it.”
He glances down again, this time actually noticing the mess of his collar, and shrugs. “Didn’t think you’d care about my wardrobe choices.”
You laugh, though it’s hollow. “Oh, I don’t. Just thought you might want to… tidy up a bit. Wouldn’t want to give anyone the wrong idea.”
Oscar, still completely relaxed, glances over at you, confused but not concerned. “What wrong idea?”
You stare at him for a moment, caught between wanting to scream and laugh at his complete obliviousness. Instead, you force out a sarcastic reply.
“Nothing,” you mutter, your voice dripping with bitterness. “Just looking out for your reputation.”
Oscar, unaware of the storm inside you, smiles softly and turns his attention back to the couch. “Right. So, still up for that movie? I did say we’d watch it.”
You swallow down the surge of frustration, nodding even though your chest feels tight. “Sure. Why not?”
You head to the kitchen, not to grab the snacks you’d laid out earlier—those were already thrown out when the disappointment set in—but to busy yourself with something, anything, to avoid looking at him. Your chest feels tight, and your head is spinning.
You settle back on the couch with Oscar, and though you’ve tried to compose yourself, the weight of everything unsaid presses down hard. He’s right there—so close—but he might as well be a million miles away.
The movie starts, but you can’t focus. Your eyes flick to the screen, but your mind races. Oscar is relaxed beside you, oblivious, a faint smile on his face as he settles into the film. Meanwhile, the tension inside you is almost unbearable.
And somehow, despite everything, he remains blissfully unaware.
You’re about halfway through La La Land when you suddenly feel Oscar’s arm settle around your shoulders. His fingers brush against your skin, and for a second, it feels like everything stops. The warmth of his touch sends a jolt of electricity through you, and your heart skips a beat.
Without thinking, you shrug it off. “I, uh… I think I want some crisps.” The words tumble out of your mouth, and before he can react, you practically leap off the couch, heading straight for the kitchen like your life depends on it.
You tell yourself you’re just hungry, but your racing heart and flushed cheeks betray the truth. Your hands tremble as you fumble with the cupboard door, staring blankly at the shelves.
Suddenly, you sense him behind you. He’s so close you can feel the warmth radiating off him.
“You okay?” Oscar’s voice is calm, but there’s a hint of concern in it.
You nod, even though your heart is hammering in your chest. “Y-Yeah, totally fine. Just, you know… snack cravings.” You don’t dare turn around, because you know if you look at him, you’ll probably combust.
Oscar steps even closer, his breath now ghosting over your shoulder. “You sure?” he asks, his tone soft, as if he can sense something’s off.
And that’s when it happens. You can’t hold it in anymore. The dam breaks, and the words spill out, fast and frantic.
“No! No, I’m not okay! Because I’ve been in love with you since I was thirteen, okay? And it’s driving me absolutely insane because you are so damn clueless and oblivious, and I thought maybe after you moved in, my feelings would just—poof—disappear, but they didn’t! They got worse! And then you come home late with lipstick on your neck, and your stupid rumpled shirt, and I try to pretend like I don’t care, but I do, Oscar! I really do! And you just keep acting like we’re—like we’re buddies, and I can’t—”
You stop, panting slightly from the rapid-fire confession, and that’s when you notice it.
Oscar is smiling.
Not just smiling—grinning. A huge, cheeky grin spreads across his face, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
Your face flushes even hotter, and you glare at him. “Quit smiling at me! I can’t stop messing up my sentences when you look at me like that.”
Oscar’s grin softens, but he doesn’t stop smiling. Instead, he takes a step closer, closing the gap between you. “You’re cute when you’re flustered, you know that?” he murmurs.
You open your mouth to respond, but the words die on your tongue as he suddenly pulls you in, pressing his lips against yours. It’s not the gentle, tentative kiss you might have imagined. No, this is full-on, heart-stopping, world-tilting, toe-curling. His hand slides to the back of your neck, pulling you in closer, and for a moment, you completely melt into it, into him.
But then, reality crashes back down. You shove him back, eyes wide as you remember the smudges of lipstick, the crumpled collar, the late night out.
“What about—what about the girls from the bar?” you stammer, stepping back, heart still racing from the kiss.
Oscar blinks, and then understanding dawns. “The lipstick?” He reaches up, brushing a finger over the spot you’d noticed earlier, and then laughs softly. “It was Meredith’s friend. She tripped, spilled her drink, and kind of… crashed into me. PR disaster, but nothing else.” He shrugs, completely calm as always. “I didn’t mention it earlier because, well, I didn’t think it mattered. Guess I should’ve explained, huh?”
You stare at him, still processing what he’s just said. The knot in your stomach starts to loosen, but your heart is still racing for entirely different reasons now.
Oscar steps closer again, his smile softer but unwavering. “You’re the one I want to be with. Not some random girl from a bar. Just you.” His voice is quiet, but there’s no hesitation in it. He looks at you like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
You feel your breath catch, the weight of everything you’ve been holding in for so long starting to lift. But instead of saying anything, you just stand there, staring at him, your mind a mess of emotions. His hand gently finds yours, and even that small touch sends another spark of warmth through you.
For once, Oscar isn’t oblivious. He can see the worry in your eyes, hope and doubt swirling in your mind. “Hey,” he murmurs, squeezing your hand gently, pulling you out of your head. “It’s always been you. I thought you knew that.”
You blink at him, still trying to believe it’s real. But the way he’s looking at you, so calm and sure… it’s hard not to believe him.
And maybe, just maybe, this isn’t as complicated as you’d made it out to be.
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starkeyisthelastname · 5 months ago
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It’s Always Been You Chapter One
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Okay.. so here is the first chapter of my first series. Things will get more exciting! Hope you loves enjoy! 🥰 Things are a little different in this universe and don’t necessarily follow the exact OBX plot line. Here is the back plot for anyone who missed!
Back Plot
Rafe is a total dick to other girls, you’ve been warned. 😅
Chapter One:
The girl below him, whose name he couldn’t remember, let out a loud moan as he shoved himself inside her entirely. He pressed her head down into the mattress, telling her to shut the fuck up. He closed his eyes, relishing in the feeling of her cunt as he tried to get a quick nut in that night. It had been a long work week, and tonight he needed a distraction from wanting to go out and get wasted. It was when he was mid stroke that his phone rang on the bedside table. He went to ignore it, but eyes glanced over the caller ID to see it read your name.
“Hey slut, listen to me. Don’t make a fuckin sound when I answer this..” Rafe spat, smacking the girl’s ass hard before sliding his thumb across the screen to answer.
You had plans to go out that night with some friends, but now we’re laying in bed with your makeup done, pajamas on as they had changed their minds, leaving you alone on a Saturday night. As you held your phone up to your ear, you heard the voice of your best friend answer after a few rings.
“What’s up?” He asked, hips not slowing down as he continued to thrust into the girl. “Club doesn’t sound too busy?” He laughed, hearing the sound of a tv in the background.
You were completely oblivious to Rafe having company, and if you did know then you would have probably shut yourself down tonight not wanting to think about all the girls he constantly was fucking that weren’t you. It was your own fault really, but he had been your best friend since before you two knew what that even meant. You couldn’t ruin your lifelong friendship by telling him you’d been in love with him since you both were teenagers.
“The girls changed their minds, don’t ask me why either because I don’t even know.” You laughed, as you were sure it had to do with one of them wanting to see their boyfriend instead. “But… can you come over? I’m bored… and can you bring food?” You asked with a soft giggle. It was when you heard a faint moan in the back, that your heart sank. That wasn’t his tv, and you knew it by the name Rafe being followed. “I-I’m sorry.. I didn’t know you were busy. Um.. just text me later.” You said, clearing your throat as the last thing you wanted was for him to hear the sad tone in your voice. It was best you hang up the call and quickly.
Rafe barely had time to respond, before the call ended. His thrusts completely came to a stop, no longer caring about his nut as he tossed his phone on the bedside table and pulled out. “Get your shit and get the fuck out of my house.” He said, voice cold as he grabbed his sweatpants from the floor. He hated himself for doing this. Meaningless hook ups to avoid how he felt about his best friend, and his anger only grew as he would have completely dropped this whiny bitch to go over to your place in a heart beat.
The girl sat on the bed, frown on her face as she watched Rafe pull the grey sweatpants over his toned hips and grabbed his vape off the dresser to take a hit of. “B- but, I didn’t cum.” She said with a pout, only to earn a mean laugh from the man that had been inside her the only moments before.
“I told you to the shut the fuck up when I was on the phone, think I care that you didn’t get to cum? Better be out of here by the time I get out of the bathroom.” Rafe said causally, walking towards his connected bathroom, not carrying that she mumbled asshole under her breath.
He was an asshole, always had been. That stemmed from some deeper issues that he didn’t talk about often. The only ones who knew about his mental health problems were his family and you, something no random girl would ever understand. He sighed, running a hand through his hair before slamming his fist on the marble counter of the sink. Why was he continuing this torture on himself? Why was he such a pussy about telling you how he felt?
You heard the beep of the alarm, signaling someone had unlocked the front door. There was only a few people who knew the code, your parents, Sarah, Wheezie and Rafe. Walking down the stairs of your townhome, you saw his tall figure stepping in quietly, a bag of food in his hand. You took a sigh, stepping onto the hardwood floor as you looked at him. You wanted to be mad at him, but you couldn’t. There was no reason to be. Right? He was just doing what Rafe Cameron did.
“What are you doing here? I thought you had your little girlfriend over.” You asked, trying to hide the obvious jealousy in your voice. Your fuzzy slippers glided over to where he stood, taking the food sack from him and turning around to head into the living room. You heard him chuckle behind you, but didn’t look back as you plopped yourself onto the couch.
“Not my fucking girlfriend.” Rafe snorted, throwing his keys on the coffee table. “You know I don’t do serious shit.” He said, collapsing down next to you as you pulled the food out from the bag. He didn’t do committed relationships as he was far too busy working at his father’s company, trying his best to become the man he needed to be. In an out of jail, high off blow and after nearly killing someone, he was trying to do right for the people he loved and more importantly himself. The only committed relationship he was willing to be in was with you, that was if he ever manned up enough to tell you.
As you unwrapped your food, you couldn’t help but feel your heart clench at that statement. For as long as you’d known Rafe he’d never dated anyone longer than a month. He was too selfish to be tied down and after everything he had went through during his coke fiend, you knew his focus was work and trying to stay clean. You just wondered if he would ever want anything serious when it came to you.
“And you really thought that bitch was important enough for me to skip coming to hang out with my best friend?” He asked, stealing a fry as he leaned back against the cushion.
Best friend.. and that’s all you would probably would ever be to him. You brushed the thought away, slapping his hand away as he started to reach for another fry. “Why didn’t you just get something if you planned on stealing my food?” You asked with a laugh as he pretended to look hurt that you slapped his hand.
Rafe always seemed to have a stick up his ass for the most part, a brooding look constantly on his handsome face. You knew it was hard for Rafe to let down the wall of being vulnerable, or even his funnier side. You felt lucky that you got to see the side of him that not a lot of people got to experience.
“I just wanted a couple, damn. It’s the least I can get for waiting in that long ass line for some damn chicken strips.” He scoffed, muttering about how the worker was an asshole anyway.
You rolled your eyes, taking a bite of one as he pulled his vape from the pocket of his hoodie to take a hit off. “Please tell me you aren’t gonna complain this much on family vacation.” You said, jokingly, meeting his blue eyes you loved so much as you looked up at him.
Blowing out the cloud of flavorful smoke, he rolled his own eyes before leaning his head back against the couch. “Don’t fucking remind me, that my dad picked fucking Disney World of all places.” He said with a grumble, shuddering at the idea of all the kids he was going to have to be around for 7 days.
It had been a tradition every summer for as long as you could remember that both of your families took a trip together. The first one of this year being Disney World, which you were excited for. Rafe on the other hand would rather go anywhere else than the happiest place on earth.
“Wheezie’s been begging to go for years and we’ve always gone elsewhere. Let your sister be happy.” You said, knowing the thirteen year old hardly got to choose anything that she wanted to do as she was the youngest out of everyone.
“She’s 13. Don’t you think she’s a little old for Mickey Mouse or some bullshit.” Rafe said, eyes traveling back to you. The way you looked so effortlessly beautiful, having washed your face free of makeup. Your hair on top of your head in a messy bun, and cute little set pink pajama set on that hugged those gorgeous curves. He wanted to groan, not only from the thought of leaving for Orlando in a few days but also that he wanted you more than anything he ever wanted in his life. Rafe pretty much got whatever his heart desired, except having you as his girl.
“You are never too old for Disney.” You told him, matter of factly as you continued to eat, completely clueless to the fact his cerulean eyes were bored into you as he watched you.
Rafe let out a small chuckle, shaking his head at the fact you and everyone else seemed to be thrilled about visiting a place he didn’t find so magical. “Are you that excited princess?” He asked, the nickname one you were used to but still felt butterflies when he said it.
Swallowing a bite, you looked up at him to meet his gaze with a nod to your head. Disney was the place where dreams came true and maybe there you would finally have the courage to tell your best friend that you were in love with him.
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afterglowkatie · 24 days ago
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security nightmares | k.m./c.f.
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katie mccabe x caitlin foord x child!reader | 2.5k | things don't go as planned at one of the arsenal matches leading you to have a nightmare later that night
ˏˋ°•*⁀ this is part of my new little starfish universe. depictions of starfish's nightmare are included in this, not too much detail but yeah <3 thank you for being so patient while i took a break. i love that you love starfish sm
Match days on their own could be quite overwhelming and full on, let alone match day in a whole different country. By now you were used to travelling on planes and going to different places, but you were only really used to doing that with the Ireland team. You couldn’t really remember travelling with the Arsenal girls that many times. You knew how travelling with Ireland worked, plus travelling on planes with Ireland was a lot more common than travelling with Arsenal so everything was bound to run more smoothly with Ireland than Arsenal. 
Your mammy had tried her best to make sure travelling with Arsenal would be the same or at least quite similar so it wouldn’t throw you around too much. But she was still constantly stressing over you. You weren’t the type of kid to really be too phased by travel or new countries, being surrounded by different languages and all that. You were quite used to it all, it was all you knew.
But there were obviously things that no one could control and whenever you were going somewhere new your mammy always stressed and worried extra about you, ‘Yes mammy, stop asking I still have it,’ You had a pout on your face and almost rolled your eyes when your mammy asked you, for what felt like the millionth time, if you had your backpack and if you had your pass on you. Your pass was important, since it told security who you were and if you got separated from either Katie or Caitlin then you were able to, with the help of security, find your way back to them.
Not that it’s ever happened, you being separated from them, but as your mammy said, it’s better to be safe and you can never be too careful, ‘Hey, starfish, this is important, okay? It’s not like we’re just at the Emirates where everyone knows who you are, this is completely different and I need to keep you safe,’ Your eyes softened and you lost your pout and attitude when your mammy brought out her serious voice.
You nodded and gave your mammy a hug, ‘I’m sorry mammy,’ 
‘I just want to keep my little starfish safe, I love you,’ Katie smiled and held you tighter, picking you up and sitting you on her hip while walking towards the change rooms.
From the atmosphere in the change rooms you could tell that today was a bit more of an important match than some of the other ones you had been to, ‘Goodluck Caity,’ You had wandered over to Caitlin after she’d finished putting on her boots, ‘Gonna get goals against them,’ You tried to swing your leg in a way to pretend you were kicking a ball just like Caitlin but you ended up falling over backwards in the process.
‘Whoops, you alright starfish?’ Caitlin was quick to help pick you back up, brushing off and flattening your little dress back out, ‘Gotta be careful starfish,’ You both laughed it off and you wrapped your arms around Caitlin’s neck giving her a hug before you were all being ushered out of the room and into the tunnel. 
‘Looks like you’re stuck with me starfish,’ Both your mammy and Caitlin were starting today so you had to go with one of the others who wasn’t starting and unfortunately for your mammy and Caitlin, Kyra had been the one who would look after you while you all sat on the bench. 
‘Oh no,’ You dramatically sighed out, throwing your head back covering your eyes with your little hands. Though as hard as you tried, your facade cracked easily and you couldn’t help but laugh.
‘You know you love me,’ Kyra poked at your sides before taking your hand so she wouldn’t lose you on the walk out, knowing that she wouldn’t want to face either Katie or Caitlin if she did lose you from her sight. 
‘Ky Ky look!’ You held your connected hands up excitedly wanting her to twirl you around so you could show her the jersey you were wearing. Normally you would wear a mini version of your mammy’s jersey but you’d been asking lately to have one with Caitlin’s number and name and today you finally had gotten one to wear at the match.
‘Oh look at you,’ Kyra smiled while you skipped slightly next to her, ‘When are you gonna wear mine to a match?’ Kyra joked but also knowing Kyra she would get you to wear one of hers just to mess with Katie.
‘Only wear mammy’s and mum’s,’ You beamed proudly, Kyra’s steps faltered a little, taking in the slight shock realising that you were referring to Caitlin as your mum. 
It’s something that Kyra had brought up to Caitlin one day when they had a moment to themselves at training, if you had or would ever call her mum or something along those lines. It was something that Katie and Caitlin had talked about but Caitlin never wanted to pressure you into calling her anything other than what you were comfortable with.
A small smile spread across Kyra’s face but she knew to not make a big deal over it, not until Caitlin was the one that told her about it. She didn’t want to spoil that moment between you and Caitlin. Also since Kyra was definitely sure you hadn’t said it to Caitlin yet, or others would definitely know by now.
When Kyra was being subbed on she made sure you were safe and being looked after. But nothing ever really goes as planned. It was an important win and when the final whistles went everyone was lost in the heat of the win. Enough that you weren’t noticed when you jumped off your seat and wandered away from the bench.
You were excited to see your mammy and Caitlin after the match. Caitlin had scored a goal and you wanted to give her a hug as soon as you could. But before you could make your way onto the pitch and towards them, like you were normally able to, you were stopped by security. None of the security had seen where you’d come from and just assumed you had come from the stands and were just a fan of the players.
‘I want my mammy,’ You yelled out towards the security guy, a little cry escaping your lips. He’d stood in front of you, quite tall and scary and blocking your view so you couldn’t see your mammy anymore. 
He was talking to you but you weren’t listening, just crying out for mammy or Caitlin just anyone to come save you. You’d forgotten your backpack where you were sitting on the bench otherwise you could show him that you belonged where you were. Then when his hand touched your shoulder, trying to escort you away from the players is when you become hysterical.
‘Get your hands off her,’ You weren’t in the head space where you could hear anyone’s voice and you missed when Caitlin came over shoving the security away from you, ‘That’s my daughter,’ Caitlin and Katie were going around looking for you when they noticed you hadn’t made your way to them and you weren’t still on the bench.
The next thing you knew you were in Caitlin’s arms, she was rubbing your back, whispering little ‘You’re okay starfish, you’re safe,’ While she took you away from the pitch, away from everyone and down the tunnel.
When your mammy reached the two of you she had some choice words to describe the security guy after Caitlin told her what she’d seen. Choice words that you’d never be allowed to repeat. 
‘I’m sorry Caity,’ You cried out, burying your head further into Caitlin’s neck and wrapping your arms as tight as they could around her, ‘I didn’t mean to forget my backpack, I know it’s important. I’m sorry,’ You were calming down enough that you could string together sentences again, even if your voice was still so soft and muffled by your tears.
‘Hey, shh, it’s okay starfish. Me and mammy, we aren’t mad at you,’ Caitlin kept rubbing her hand over your back soothingly, ‘We’re both just glad you’re okay and safe with us again,’ You calmed down almost completely, letting Caitlin’s soft voice and words soothe you. You were just glad to be back with them.
‘I’m gonna go get her things, you gonna be okay?’ You heard your mammy’s voice, it was softer than usual, the kind of voice she always saves for when you’re upset or tired. In a few years you’d find it amusing how your mammy’s voice can be so strong and bold but then so different when it comes to you. Something you’ll always appreciate.
‘Yeah, we’ll be fine. I’ve got her,’ Caitlin had sat you both down at her cubby, wrapping you up in one of her hoodies.
‘I love you,’ Katie placed a soft kiss on Caitlin’s temple, rubbing her arm softly, ‘And I love you my little starfish,’ You gave your mammy a small smile, Katie met you with a sad smile when she saw how red your eyes were. She gave you a kiss on your forehead and a little hug as best she could with how you were positioned and left to go get your backpack and anything else you had left behind.
Before the girls started filtering into the change rooms, Katie had already told them what had happened, Caitlin was grateful that everyone kept their distance and didn’t overwhelm you. Some of the girls silently checked with Caitlin to make sure you were okay before going about their post match routines. 
It wasn’t long before your mammy joined you both. She was glad to see you weren’t crying anymore and had settled yourself, but she still wiped a little under your eyes and rubbed your cheek softly. It was obvious you had exhausted yourself, the way your eyes were half closed, the small pout on your face, how you weren’t really present and focused on your surroundings and the way you were leaning into Caitlin.
You didn’t leave Caitlin’s arms, not on the way to the bus and not once when Caitlin was seated on the bus, all the way back to the hotel you were all staying at. On the bus your mammy had given you your favourite starfish toy you’d brought with you and once you had that safely tucked in your arms, along with the comfort of Caitlin’s hoodie you had on, you were out like a light. 
‘Thank you for taking such good care of starfish,’ Katie whispered to Caitlin once they’d both slipped into their bed. In the hotel room you were staying in, your bed was in the same room just a little bit from their bed. They were able to get a bigger room that had a separate space for you but for Katie’s peace of mind, they opted for a room where you were in the same space as them. 
‘You don’t have to thank me, she’s my daughter too,’ Caitlin opened her arms, pulling Katie into her embrace.
‘I know,’ Katie whispered, looking over to where you were sleeping before looking up at Caitlin, ‘You’re just so good with her. I don’t know how we got so lucky,’ Katie smiled softly, cuddling more into Caitlin.
‘I’m the one who got lucky to have you both in my life,’ They both shared a small kiss before following you in falling asleep, your mammy taking a bit longer while she watched over you for a bit to make sure you were sleeping okay before she went to sleep.
Your sleep had started out promising, until it went downhill. Luckily for you, you never did have nightmares all that often. But unlucky for you is that when you did, they felt like the worst dreams in the world since you weren’t used to them. The dream seemed like it was a good dream, you were at the match watching your mammy and Caitlin play but then suddenly they were gone. They were gone and you were calling out for them, calling out for anyone to help you but no one could hear you. No one could see you and you couldn’t find your mammy or your mum.
Suddenly you were all alone. The world felt cold and you were on the ground holding your legs to your chest until some big, tall scary looking man loomed over you. In your bed you were tossing and turning, your arms thrashing around and when you woke up it was dark and you couldn’t see your mammy or your mum.
Already close to tears the moment you woke up, the dark room and feeling like you were still alone and left behind sat like a weight in the bottom of your stomach. You burst out in tears, crying out. Trying to call for your mammy or your mum but nothing other than loud cries were coming out.
Instantly at the sound of your cries, Katie and Caitlin both sat up. Your mammy frantically tried to turn on a bigger light while Caitlin made her way over to you. Caitlin took your little body, as gentle as she could so she wouldn’t frighten you, into her arms gently rocking you and soothing you.
A frown spread across Caitlin’s face as you cried out, making out the words, ‘Don’t leave me,’ ‘Was all alone,’ ‘Couldn’t find you,’ while you cried harder and your little hands fisted her shirt tightly. 
‘Shh, it’s okay starfish. You’re okay. You’re safe, me and mammy are right here,’ Caitlin spoke softly into your ear, over and over, hoping that her words would eventually break through and you would start to calm down.
Your mammy sat beside you both, her hand rubbing up and down your back, letting Caitlin take the lead. If Katie started talking too she knew it would only overwhelm you and make everything worse, but her presence was enough especially when you would start to calm down and be present enough to know she was also right there.
‘We’ll never leave you or let anyone take you away from us,’ You’d calmed down a lot to the point your cries were just little hiccups, ‘You’re our little starfish and we love you so much,’ 
‘Promise?’ You sniffled looking up at Caitlin, a little pout on your face.
‘Pinky promise,’ Caitlin held her pinky up towards you, letting go of her shirt you linked your own with Caitlin’s. Once you were ready, Caitlin gently moved you over to her and Katie’s bed. Your mammy already had your starfish toy waiting for you while Caitlin placed you in the middle. 
‘Love you mammy,’ Your voice was small, tiredness evident. You turned your head so you were facing and cuddling into Caitlin’s side, ‘I love you mum,’ You were safe and most importantly you were back with your mammy and your mum.
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krirebr · 9 months ago
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Welcome to Your Life
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Pairing: dark vampire!Steve Rogers x f!reader
Word Count: ~3.75k
Summary: During a drunken night out on vacation, you're brought to a strange club and presented to a mysterious man. Part of Everybody Wants to Rule the World
Warnings: Horror elements, dark elements, mind control, some blood and gore, feeding on humans, captivity, dub/con, SMUT - All of my work is 18+ - Minors DNI
Divider by @saradika
We're All Monsters
Masterlist
A/N: And here it is, the first part of Vampire Steve's solo story! If you missed his introduction, it was in I Can't Sleep Cause My Bed's On Fire. You don't need to read that before you read this, but some of the world-building (specifically how his club works) might be helpful. Plus, it's a vampire threesome, so 🥵🥵🥵
This is also the first part of the new, super-expanded supernatural universe that I'm doing with @paperweight91, playing off of what I started with my Psycho Killer AU. Big thanks to Chelsea for all her help on this and for just how much fun it's been to come up with ideas with her for this whole universe.
Now, where it might get slightly confusing, but I really hope it doesn't. This story introduces a new character, Cutter, who will eventually be a reader in one of Chelsea's stories in her werewolf half of this au. She is not physically described at all here, other than being a woman. I hope it gets you excited about what @paperweight91 has in store for her.
As always, any comments, reblogs, or asks are very appreciated. You know how much I love this Steve. Please come screech with me about him!!!
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You were shaking. That was the only thing you knew. You didn’t know where you were or what you were doing there. Not even how you’d gotten there, just that you were standing in the back room of some club, surrounded by people—were they people? Of course, they were. What else could they be?!—unable to move, and you couldn’t stop shaking.
You’d been on vacation with some friends in Berlin. You’d all decided to have a wild night out together but were quickly separated. While tipsily searching for them at a club, you’d bumped into a man, an American, who told you his name was Cole. And suddenly, looking for your friends didn’t seem as important. He’d told you he knew a great bar just a few blocks away. You didn’t really remember agreeing to go with him, but now you were here, in a room full of strangers who wouldn’t stop leering at you. No one had done anything or even said anything, but you knew in your bones that you were not safe. And yet, you couldn’t move.
Cole, especially, wouldn’t take his eyes off you, your neck in particular. You desperately wished for something to cover up your club attire. A woman was leaning against the wall in the corner, sharpening her ridiculously long nails with a knife. She looked up occasionally, and this time her gaze landed on Cole, a scowl on her face. “You know he gets first taste,” she said, before looking back down in disinterest.
“I know,” he said, his fingers drumming impatiently on his thigh.
“Everything has to get his approval before it goes on the menu,” she continued, still not looking up as she filed her nails to a terrifying point. 
“Yes,” Cole gritted out, “I know that, Cutter. I’m not fucking new.”
“Then stop acting like you’re jonesing for your next fix. You’re that fucking hungry? Go get yourself something to eat that actually is on the menu.” Nothing they were saying made any sense. 
He scowled at her, but started to leave the room, and then, suddenly, stopped. Everyone stopped. Cutter looked up, listening for something, then pushed herself off the wall and made her way over to you. She brushed one of her exceedingly sharp nails over your bottom lip. Looking you in the eye, she breathed, “Kneel, sweetheart.” And you were on your knees before you had any idea what had happened. She smiled at you and added, “Be quiet,” and you knew, in every cell, that you wouldn’t have been able to make any noise if you’d tried. 
One of the doors opened and a tall, broad, beautiful man came into the room and you felt the energy of everything change. It was like it was all, yourself included, suddenly charged with electricity. You’d never felt anything like it. He zeroed in on you instantly and made his way over. You felt the instinct to cower, but it was far away, almost like it was behind a wall. And you still couldn’t move anyway. All you could do was shiver.
The man looked at you carefully. “Pretty,” he said, absently. He brushed his thumb over your lower lip just like Cutter had. Then he gripped your chin and angled it up so you were forced to make eye contact. “Give me your wrist,” he said and you couldn’t explain the feeling that moved through your body, only that you reached your wrist up to him, you had to, and waited for him to take it. He took it in his firm grip and placed his thumb right over your pulse point. He pressed down hard and smiled when you still didn’t move, didn’t react. It was like you didn’t know how. And then, something happened, so quickly you couldn’t process it. Fangs descended into his mouth and he lowered his head to your wrist and bit down hard. It was some of the worst pain you’d ever felt, but you didn’t pull away, didn’t make a sound. It wasn’t until you felt the wetness on your cheeks that you even realized you were crying. It was like all the different parts of you were separated. 
He pulled his teeth from your wrist and then licked the wound clean. He grinned at you and said, “You have excellent taste in cocktails, honey.” Then he looked over at Cutter and his smile dropped. “She’s still drunk. You should have known better.”
Her mouth fell open, and then she flung her hand out at Cole who stood sheepishly on the other side of the room. “Cole’s the one who brought her in!”
He was in front of her in a blink, the arm that was still in the air now in his firm grasp. She grimaced. “And you know exactly how good his judgment is,” he growled.
“Steve,” she whispered, just barely loud enough for you to hear her.
The man (could you even call him that? Deep down you knew what he was), Steve, brought his face as close to hers as possible. “When I put you in charge,” he said, so lowly, “I expect you to be in charge.”
She just stared at him for a moment meeting his gaze, then dropped her own and nodded. He smiled fondly, you were surprised to see, and kissed her on the cheek. “You know he needs supervision.”
He made his way back to where you were still kneeling, now cradling your arm. He bent down to you slightly and stroked a hand down your neck. “There’s something there, though,” he said, although you weren’t sure who he was talking to. Certainly not to you. “Underneath everything else. I’ll try her again tomorrow and see how she is when the blood’s pure.”
You gazed up at him, confused, and he gripped your chin in his hand. “You may speak,” he said.
“I don’t understand what’s happening,” was all you could manage.
“Oh honey, of course, you don’t,” he said with a grin that frightened you. “The good news is that you’ll never need to understand anything ever again.” He looked back up at the room at large. “Set her up in a room upstairs.” He released your chin and made his way to the exit, pausing as he was almost out the door to call “Cole!” over his shoulder. The other man quickly followed him out of the room.
Cutter came to stand in front of you. She looked you in the eye and said, “Up,” and without thinking, you were on your feet. “Such a good girl,” she cooed. “Follow me,” and suddenly that was all you wanted to do.
The room she took you to was better described as a cell. There was a cot, a toilet, and a sink. No windows. Painted grey. It was tiny. Cutter left as soon as you were inside and you heard the door lock behind her. 
You sat down on the bed and closed your eyes. You felt the urge to panic but it was like your body wouldn’t cooperate. Your heart rate stayed steady, your breaths even. You were calm, even if that was the last thing you wanted to be. 
These people must have done something to you. People, right. You knew what they were. Every single one of them had stared at your neck. Steve had fangs and he’d literally drank your blood. You knew, even if an hour ago you would’ve sworn that was just fantasy. Vampires. You were being held captive by vampires. What the hell?
There was nothing to occupy your time in here except for your thoughts, so you curled up on the cot and tried to convince yourself that it was all a bizarre dream. Eventually, your exhaustion overtook you and you fell asleep. 
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You weren’t sure when exactly you woke up. You hadn’t seen a single window since Cole had brought you into the building last night. Because sunlight kills vampires, you thought to yourself, somewhat hysterically. Your memories of the night before were… weird. And not just because you swear someone drank your blood. They were patchy. And yes, you’d been drunk, but not that drunk. Not so drunk that you blacked out small portions of the night. And certainly not so drunk that you hallucinated vampires. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. There was no way out of the cell. Nothing in it that would help you. All you could do was wait for whatever it was that was coming for you.
Sometime later, hours probably, a slit in the door you hadn’t noticed before was opened, and a tray was slid through. Food. You gathered it quickly and sat on the bed. There was a carton of water and a plate with a large salad that was mostly made up of spinach and lentils. Iron-rich food, your mind supplied. The previous night seemed more and more real.
.You thought about refusing the salad, but you were so hungry, so you ate it. It was surprisingly good, but not what you would have chosen for what would probably be your last meal. You lay back down when you were finished, curled up on your side, and daydreamed of something more satisfying than a spinach salad. 
More time passed. You stared at the walls and tried not to freak out. You wondered if your friends had made it back to the hotel. How long it took for them to realize you were missing. Were the police searching for you? Did your family know? You couldn’t help it when the tears started. You were pretty sure you were going to die here.
You dozed in and out for who knows how long. And then the door opened. Steve walked in with Cole behind him, carrying a chair. You jolted up and pressed yourself into the wall. “Stop,” Steve said, and everything did. “Calm down,” and you felt everything in your body slow. Suddenly, you couldn’t access whatever it was that you’d been so scared of. So you sat still and watched him. 
Cole handed Steve the chair and he placed it in front of your cot. He sat down and looked at you. His gaze made you feel so small. He reached out his hand and brushed the backs of his fingers against your knee. A chill ran up your spine, not just fear, but an excitement too, that you couldn’t explain. “Give me your other wrist,” he said, lowly, and you immediately did. He took it in his hand and brought it up to his nose, forcing you to lean forward. He inhaled deeply. “Much better,” he said. “You’re all sobered up now, aren’t you?”
You didn’t respond. You knew, deep inside yourself, that he didn’t want you to. His fangs dropped and you braced yourself, something in the far recesses of your mind knowing that you should be scared. With a slight grin, he sank his teeth into your wrist. The pain was just as bad as the night before but soon, so much quicker than the last time, it was over and Steve was pulling away, his eyes still locked on you.
“Shit,” he breathed.
“What?” Cole asked, from his place by the door. “She’s that bad?”
“No,” Steve growled. “She tastes like sunshine.” He stood up and leaned over you, running the back of one finger across your cheek. “Precious thing.”
You looked up at him and blinked. “Please,” you said, “please, I want to go home.”
“No, honey,” he cooed, so gently, “you’ll never go home again.” As you tried to process that through the fog, he turned to Cole. “Put her in my private reserves. I’ll have her for dinner.” And then he was out of the room.
Cole looked at you, a pout on his face. “Goddamnit,” he grumbled, “I’ve been waiting for a taste.”
“You’re gonna bite me, too?” you asked, alarmed.
He sighed. “Not anymore. I’d rather not face the true death, thanks.” He looked you in the eye. “Come with me.” 
You felt something move through you at that. There was definitely a strong urge to obey that you wouldn’t resist, but it was nothing like what you felt with Steve, or even Cutter, where it was like your body was on strings. It wasn’t a huge weakness, but you were taking note of everything at this point. 
Cole took you through a long series of hallways that you couldn’t hope to keep track of. Cole talked the whole way, mostly inane bits about his frustrations with the pecking order in whatever vampire organization this was. You marveled for a moment at the fact that you were describing something to do with mythical monsters as inane. Finally, just as you arrived at a door not dissimilar to the one you’d just come out of, he concluded with “You’re a really good listener.”
You gaped at him. What did he think was happening here? He’d targeted you, done something to you to bring you here where you were trapped and probably going to die and he thought you cared that he didn’t feel respected enough by his fellow monsters???
But staying alive right now was your primary concern, so you just quietly said, “Thank you,” and let him show you into the room. 
It was much bigger than the cell, but still small, along the lines of a spacious walk-in closet. There was a plush rug under your feet, a deep rose color. A four-poster bed was to one side covered in a big, fluffy comforter that was in a lighter shade of dusty pink and piled with pillows to match. The far wall was entirely made of mahogany built-in bookcases that were completely full of books. There was a soft-looking armchair in the corner by the shelves. You turned back to Cole and asked, “What is this?”
“It’s your room,” he said with a smile. He looked you in the eye. “Now,” he said, and you felt his words travel through your body. He pointed at a door without breaking eye contact, “that’s your bathroom. You’re going to use it now to get very clean and smooth. There are lotions you’ll use after to make yourself soft. There are things in there,” he pointed to a beautiful armoire in the corner, “for you to change into when you’re done. Steve will be back in a few hours and you will be ready for him. Do you understand?”
“Yes,” you said, your voice coming out of you without any conscious thought or effort, “I’ll be ready for Steve.”
“Good girl,” he said, and gently patted your cheek. He stood awkwardly, watching you, but now that the command was in you, you were focused on getting to the bathroom so you could get clean. He was in your way.
“I have to get ready for Steve,” you told him, your voice sounding oddly robotic to your own ears.
Cole blinked at you and then sighed. “Right,” he said, sounding almost forlorn. He stared at you again and then shook his head. “I’ll see you again soon,” he said, stroking one hand down your arm. And then he finally left.
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It was the most luxurious shower of your life. 
When you came out of the bathroom, clean, smooth, and more moisturized than you’d ever been, you opened the armoire to find a small collection of slips in different sizes hanging in it. You found the one that would fit you best and put it on. It was black, a combination of silk and lace. It felt expensive against your skin. You searched the drawers, and next to a collection of silk briefs, you found a pair of black lace panties that would work for you. 
Once you were dressed (or as dressed as you were going to be with what was available), you moved to the bookshelves. They were chock full of every genre and category you could think of. Vaunted classics next to dime store romances. Shakespeare collections and airport schlock. You ran your fingers across the spines, when, suddenly, from behind you– 
“If there’s something you particularly enjoy, let me know and I’ll have someone get it for you.” 
You spun around to find Steve just inches from you. You hadn’t heard a noise when he’d come in. There was a coldness emanating from him that made goosebumps rise along your flesh. Your breath caught and he grinned. You inhaled and asked, “You aren’t going to kill me?”
He laughed. “Oh no, Sunshine. You’re too delicious. I’m going to be feeding from you for a long, long time.”
You tried to back up, but the wall of bookcases blocked you. You pressed yourself into it anyway. He opened his mouth and you hurried to say “Please don’t make me calm down!”
His eyes narrowed and he tilted his head to the side. “Explain,” he commanded and you were obeying before you even registered the word.
“I don’t know what you’re doing to me, but I feel it when you tell me to do things. And I– I don’t know. I don’t know.” You wanted to obey, every part of you was trying, but you had no vocabulary for any of what this was. So you were left chanting, “I don’t know,” over and over. 
“Stop,” he said, and of course, everything did. “You can feel it?” he asked. “The compulsion? You actually feel it move through your body?”
The word was new to you, but you knew what he meant. You nodded and he hummed. “Oh, you are very interesting, aren’t you, pet?” 
You didn’t say anything to that, just watched him warily. He gave you a sharklike grin that sent chills down your spine and said “Now, calm down.”
And just like before, you felt everything inside you slow. Your body sagged a bit against the shelves, no longer trying to push your way through them.
“There,” he said, cupping your face in his large hand. “Isn’t that better, little pet?”
He guided you to the armchair and sat down in it, pulling you onto his lap. You could feel the supernatural strength in his thighs as you settled on top of him, sidesaddle, as he took all of your weight without any reaction at all. He scratched his thumbnail down your jugular and you closed your eyes. “It hurts,” you said, your tone surprisingly flat for how afraid of all this you’d been just a moment before.
“Hmm?” he questioned, as he nuzzled his nose along your throat.
“When you bite me,” you said, still so calm, “it hurts so much.”
“Oh, is that all?” he asked and you could hear the smile in his voice. “Don’t worry, Sunshine, I’ll make it feel just as good for you as it will for me.”
With that, he moved one of his hands in between your legs, slowly sliding it up your thigh. His face was fully in the crook of your neck when he mumbled “Feel this,” and you felt the command vibrate through your whole body. The calmness that had flattened you faded away and you let out a little whine when his hand reached your mound. He pushed your panties to the side and slid his fingers between your folds. You gasped as he quickly found your clit, tracing slow lazy circles around it. You tried to grind down onto his hand and you felt him huff a laugh into your neck. His tongue darted out, licking a wide stripe all along your vein. You let out another whine, so desperate this time. 
He chuckled again. “I was going to make you get wet for me,” he said, as his fingers began to prod at your hole gently, his thumb still working at your clit, “but I don’t need to, do I? Or at least, not with my voice.” He was right, you were already soaking, and there was no resistance as he slipped one finger inside of you. You squirmed against his hand and he added another finger. 
His mouth was still on your neck, lapping and nipping at your jugular, but he hadn’t sunk his teeth in yet. He scissored his fingers for a moment, stretching you so good that you cried out before he added a third. They stroked inside your walls, looking for your spot. He found it and you threw your head back. 
“Come on,” he growled, “give me what I need.” He curled his fingers, scraping against that place inside you just right. You screamed as you were thrown over the edge of your orgasm and that’s the moment he finally sunk his fangs into your neck. You felt it, you did. The pain was just as intense as before but mingled with some of the strongest pleasure you’d ever felt, you couldn’t bring yourself to care. Your body spasmed around his fingers as he loudly sucked from your neck. You swore that you could feel the blood rushing to both places. You babbled as you coasted along the waves of your orgasm, feeling like it would never end. Even as the aftershocks quieted and slowed down, his mouth was still latched to your neck, taking what he needed from you. Your body was fully collapsed into his now. Everything offered up for the taking. 
Finally, his teeth left you and he gently licked the blood from your skin. He slowly removed his fingers from you and you whined at the emptiness. He brought them up to your lips. “Clean up your mess,” he commanded and your mouth dropped open without thinking. He slid his fingers in and you swirled your tongue around them. You tasted yourself, sweet and musky, as you sucked him clean. He pulled them out with a soft pop and wiped them on the bodice of your slip. 
You looked at his face. He still had your blood on his lips. You felt the odd urge to kiss him but didn’t have the chance as he pushed you off his lap. Your knees buckled, too weak to stand. He laughed gently, like you might at a cute animal that was struggling, as he lifted you into his arms and carried you to the bed. He laid you down and tucked you in. “Rest up, Sunshine,” he cooed, and your body did as it was told, quickly sinking into sleep. “I’ll be back for more soon.”
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moody-alcoholic · 2 months ago
Text
These Violent Delights
Chapter 5 - Once Upon A Playground Rainy
Summary: Poly 141 x fem!reader, a/b/o alternate universe. 6.6k words. Omega's trying to be helpful for better and for worse.
CW: a/b/o alternative universe, a/b/o dynamics, typical a/b/o universe tropes (claiming, heats), Gaslighting, medical procedures, bullying, angst.
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Enjoy <3
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You make it to the lab just after 6. The barracks were quiet when you left but the base is busy with activity. You feel like you’re breaking some kind of rule sneaking around. You don’t need to sneak, Dr. Piper knows about this. The lab is quiet too, there is only Dr. Miller sat in his usual spot at the desk. He has goggles on as he looks at something in a jar. 
“Hey, glad you remembered, I was worried you weren't going to show.”  He smiles at you looking up from whatever he’s working on. 
“I want to help them, I won't forget,” you say walking over to him. He takes his goggles off and pushes back from the table. You stop at the bottom of the steps. 
“Come on, we need to go to the medical room,” he says walking over to you. You both make your way up to the room which has a keycode on it now. He knows the code, Dr. Piper must trust him. You automatically sit up on the exam bed when you go in. 
“Is Dr. Piper coming?” you ask as you watch him clean his hands. 
“I told her she could sit this one out, she needs all the rest she can get.” He smiles at you as he drys his hands off. Well that’s true. She’s always working so late you barely get to see her. 
“So what are we doing?” you ask. His scent is strong in the air now and you try not to let it go to your head. 
“I need to take some blood, and I have something for you to take,” he says, taking things out of the cupboard. 
“What is it?” you ask watching him organize everything.  
“The drug? The same you had last time,” he says looking at you confused. 
“Last time?” you ask, you remember him giving you 2 injections. 
“Yeah, do you not remember?” he says, coming over to you with the tray of supplies. You try to think back, but you can’t remember. You remember the conversion about when he left the bunker. 
“Do you normally have trouble remembering things?” he asks. You shake your head, why can’t you remember ?
“Good, we wouldn’t want to give Dr. Montgomery more to worry about, would we.” 
“No,” you say, rolling your sleeve up so he can take some blood. When he’s done he comes back over with a syringe. You’re too scared to ask what it is now. You should remember, you’re sure he told you. 
“It’s for the hormone blocker right?” you ask, pulling the rest of your sleeve up. 
“There you go, you’re not losing the plot.” He smiles, you smile back. It’s for Simon, it’s the hormone blocker of course.
“So are you ready for your heat?” he asks as he finishes up. 
“I guess so, I still have a few weeks. Do you think the blocker will be ready by then?” you ask, pulling your sleeve down. 
“I hope so. I’m working as hard as I can. You doing this is a big help,” he says, throwing everything in the trash. You hop off the bed. 
“Wait, you should lay down for a bit, 15 minutes. Wouldn’t want you passing out on the way back to the barracks would we?” You shake your head getting back up on the bed. He comes round and raises the back for you so you can lean back a bit. 
“Why would I pass out? I didn’t last time,” you say. 
“No but it’s better to be safe than sorry. I wouldn't want you getting hurt,” he says, you sigh, relaxing back. It’s the first time you’ve been up this early in days and with the sleepless nights, it’s not long before you’re starting to doze off. The room is warm and the exam table is surprisingly comfy. 
You don’t remember falling asleep, but you’re woken by the room door opening. 
“How are you feeling?” Dr. Miller asks. You blink away the sleep in your eyes. You move off the bed. 
“Fine, tired.” He smiles and you follow him out of the room. 
“Take it easy, okay, we don’t need to give Dr. Montgomery or Captain Price anything to worry about, okay?” You nod blindly at him as you leave. You’re so tired, you want to get back into bed. The walk back over to the barracks is nice. The morning sun lights up the dew-covered grass, and there’s a low fog making the forest look like something out of a picture book. You let the smell of pine fill your nose before you walk back into the barracks. 
“Hey, where have you been so early?” Johnny asks from the table, you look up at the clock it’s already almost 7. You didn’t think anyone would be up this early. Shit , you don’t know what to say. 
“Dr. Piper. I needed to see her about something,” you lie. You take another step towards the kitchen. There’s no way he can tell you’re lying. You blow out the nerves. 
Dr. Piper comes into the kitchen. You freeze watching as Johnny looks at her then back at you, confused. She goes over to the kettle while you’re just standing there trying to decide what to do.  
“Dr. Piper, I need to talk to you,” you say quickly, before Johnny can get a word in. She turns with a mug in her hand, and she frowns at you. 
“Okay.” She puts the mug down and starts to head back to her room. You quickly follow after her. 
“I thought you were at the lab,” you say loud enough for Johnny to hear. 
“You were at the lab? Is everything okay?” she asks as you walk into her room. She closes the door behind you. 
“Yeah, just the sleeping pills. I think they’re a good idea,” you say. 
“Okay, I’ll get that sorted,” she says. You sigh. “Are you sure there isn’t anything else?” 
“No, I’m just tired,” you say. You want to get out of the room now. 
“We still need to talk with Captain Price about your heat.” You feel yourself blushing, you’re embarrassed all of a sudden. 
“We kissed,” you blurt out. “Me and John.” 
Dr. Piper looks a little shocked. 
“How do you feel about that?” she asks. 
“I don’t know, it was nice, I trust him.” You look at her as she takes a step towards you. 
“I mean we’re going to have sex in a few weeks, I feel like a kiss is nothing really.” 
“That’s true but heats are very different from something romantic like a kiss,” she says. Romantic? 
“I like John,” you say. 
“That’s good, and he’s a good alpha. It’s okay to feel all these new emotions. This heat will be very different from the past ones. It’s good that we’re talking, and you know my door is always open,” she says, resting her hand on your shoulder.
You nod, smiling at her. She’s right, this time it will be different. You’re going to be getting claimed for one, not to mention you’ll actually be with someone you trust. It’s different now that you’re in a pack. A device beeps on Dr. Piper's waist. She drops her hand looking at it. 
“Crap, I have to go. I’ll sort out the meeting with John okay?” she says as you walk out the room. You nod at her and she smiles, rushing down the corridor. Johnny steps round the corner with a bowl in his hand and a spoon in his mouth. He gives you a look. You’re not quite sure what it means, so you go into your room, closing the door behind you. You don’t need anyone to worry. You just need to be a good omega. 
A week goes by and Dr. Piper still hasn’t set up the meeting. She’s been busy: new scientists show up—normal people, not people who worked for the professor. They don’t look at you as weird as the regular soldiers. They look at you more in awe, like you’re something to be studied. 
Your visits with Dr. Miller have been going well. He keeps you up to date on the progress, and how it’s going. He thinks he's perfected the hormone blocker but the true test will come during your heat. You’ve been tired, the early mornings mixed with the restless nights have been hitting you hard.
You haven’t seen much of John or Simon, but Johnny and Kyle have been around and you’ve been eating lunch or dinner with them which is nice. Not so many people stare and talk when you’re with them. You really want to spend some time with John and maybe go for a walk again.
It surprises you when John asks if you could help with a training exercise. You don’t mind, in fact you were more than happy to help. You’ve not really seen them in action apart from when they rescued you. You weren't really paying attention to what was going on then, just hoping you made the right choice to trust them. 
“Okay, here’s what’s going to happen,” John says, getting everyone’s attention. You’re standing next to him and everyone else is lined up with their backs to what looks like an empty abandoned building. Everyone is dressed head to toe in gear with massive weapons swung over their shoulders. The sight of them makes the hairs stand up on the back of your neck.  
“So now that we have these heightened senses, we need to train them. Dr. Montgomery suggested this. Since omegas give off the strongest scent, she’s going to hide somewhere in the building and it’ll be your job to find her and bring her out without using your eyes.” John picks up a bag by his feet throwing strips of black cloth to them all. 
“We’re playing hide and seek with blindfolds?” Johnny asks as he catches one. 
“Yes, and the quicker you find her the less drills we have to do. You’ve all felt the heightened sensations, your sight, hearing, smell. That’s a benefit of the formula. It’s the main reason Professor Hale was trying to perfect it, so that the US could have an army of ‘super soldiers,’” John explains. 
“So we’re super soldiers now?” Johnny asks, tying the black strip round his forehead. 
“The only thing super about you is how much you can run that mouth of yours MacTavish,” Simon says. You smile as you watch him secure his blindfold on his forehead. 
John turns to you, placing his hand on your shoulder. “Okay, so you’re going to hide anywhere you want inside the building. Make it as hard as you want, just don’t get yourself hurt.” You nod. 
“What about you, are you going to be looking for me too?” He shakes his head 
“Actually alphas are the worst at detecting scent so maybe you would need more training,” you say looking at John. You feel yourself blushing as you hear Johnny chuckle. 
“Someone needs to watch to make sure you’re not cheating.” Kyle nudges Johnny, who starts to protest and you see John shake his head. 
“Go on then, go hide. We'll give you a few minutes,” John says to you, nodding towards the building. You smile at him and walk past them all into the entrance of the building. There's rubble everywhere and before you’ve really even made it in you're tripping over stones. You go upstairs walking down one of the empty halls looking in each room seeing if there’s anything you could hide behind or inside of. John did say make it hard, but you’re not sure what that means for 3 trained soldiers.
You can hear them talking outside. You know for sure they can hear you moving around no matter how hard you try to avoid making noise. You come to the end of the long building. There is another staircase down but you want to stay upstairs. You duck into one of the rooms that has boards on the top half of the door. There’s a desk in the room. Better than nothing. 
You sit down. This is fun, and you’re helping them. You hear John tell them they can go and you feel nervous all of a sudden. Your adrenaline spikes at the thought of you being hunted. You keep still, but you project your scent. You want to help them a little bit. You can hear them downstairs, talking and moving around. 
“So we’re like sniffer dogs?” Johnny asks. You hear Simon sigh. They’re under you now, you think. Maybe they’re confused. You stop projecting your scent. 
“What dog would you be if you could be a dog?” Johnny asks. The thought of Johnny as a dog makes you giggle. 
“Shush!” They stop. You slap your hand over your mouth realizing what you’ve done. You can’t help but smile though. You hear them moving a little quicker now. It sounds like they’re heading to the staircase at the end of the hall. It takes them a while to get up the steps. You contemplate moving but decide to stay. If you so much as move the stones around you, they’ll be able to hear it.
When you can see their shadows in the hallway you hold your breath. You’re not sure why. Even an alpha would be able to smell you this close. They’re quiet on their feet, sure of their movements even with the blindfolds. You see Simon first. You can only see the bottom half of his body as he turns to face the room, his hands feeling the boards.  
“Duck into this room on the right,” Simon says. Shit, it’s over, they’ve found you. Simon walks over to you and you stand up putting your arm out to stop him before he walks into you. He pulls the blindfold off and you smile at him. 
“Found her,” Simon says as Johnny and Kyle stumble in pulling their blindfolds up. You walk out with them and Johnny wraps his arm around your shoulders. You feel like if you'd let him he would have carried you out of the building like some trophy they’ve just won. When you get back out John seems happy, nodding and smiling before asking everyone to do it again. You try to pick a harder spot but the place is pretty barren. You start just trying to avoid them, moving from room to room when they get close to you. 
One of the runs you accidentally bump into Kyle when they split up. They’re too good at this, always finding you within at least 10 minutes which makes John happy. You’re not sure how long you’ve been doing this for but it must be midday at least. The sun is high in the sky and it's unusually warm. Johnny has his arm around you again as you walk out the building. You look up at the sky when you leave, you're bringing your hand up to block the sun when everything goes fuzzy. You’re overcome with dizziness and then everything goes black. 
“Hey, can you hear us lass?” That’s Johnny’s voice. You open your eyes. The sun is bright in the sky. Johnny is leaning over you, his hands shaking your shoulders. You feel sick and lightheaded. You should have eaten something this morning. You hear more voices around you as you start to sit up, what happened? The last thing you remember was stepping out of the building.  
“Don’t move, let's wait for the doctor to come.” Johnny pushes your shoulder back down. Your fingers are tingling as your senses start to come back. All you can smell is beta in the air, it’s calming. You look around seeing John come over to you. His alpha is strong, overwhelming the beta in the air. Now you really don’t want to be laid on the floor. 
“I’m fine,” you say, trying to sit up again. You don’t want to be a bother. You remember what Dr. Miller told you. Dr. Piper and John are always so busy. They don’t have time for you to be forgetting to eat.  
“You’re not fine, stay there.” John’s voice is commanding. It makes hairs stand up on the back of your neck. He’s worried. Johnny lets you sit up supporting your shoulders. You watch as Simon walks back over to John and you can see Kyle walking over with Dr. Piper. You don’t need her—you’re fine, you just pushed yourself too much and skipped breakfast. Dr. Piper kneels down putting a bag on the floor next to you. 
“I’m fine,” you repeat. She sighs, opening the bag and taking out the blood pressure cuff. You stare at her. You’ve been through this a million times before. 
“How do you feel? You’re not allowed to say fine,” she asks as she swabs your forehead with a thermometer.
“Lightheaded,” you admit, “but it’s going away.”
“Blood pressure is low. When was the last time you ate?” she asks. You look up at John. 
“I had breakfast,” you lie. 
“Yeah? We’re going to check that theory,” she says, reaching out for your hand. You sigh, letting her prick your finger. She puts it in the machine as you wait for the reading. 
“Low blood pressure, oh look at that! Low blood sugar,” she says, standing up and putting everything away. You look up at John. His arms are crossed, and you can’t tell if he looks angry or worried. You’ve been a bad omega. You should have eaten breakfast. 
“You know you can’t be doing this so close to your heat. You need to eat 3 meals a day,” she says, helping you up to your feet. You nod, keeping your eyes on John. He’s disappointed at least. 
“Simon’s going to take you back to the barracks,” John says. You look over at Simon. You can never tell what he’s thinking, especially with the mask. You don’t want to go with Simon, but you don’t want to upset John more than you already have. You nod following him as he walks away. You feel sick. You shouldn’t have been projecting your scent so much. If you had given them a challenge then you wouldn’t be as tired. You walk in silence back to the barracks. You feel like a kid that’s done something wrong. When you get through the door he pulls out one of the chairs from the table. 
“Sit,” he says, going into the kitchen. You watch as Simon waits for the kettle to boil. You’re nervous, and you don’t know why. 
“Milk and sugar?” he asks, looking over at you. You nod. It feels like the most he’s ever spoken to you. You watch as he makes tea. You think this is the most you’ve ever seen him do, too. He comes over placing a mug down. You smile, pulling it into your hands, warming them as he sits next to you. You swallow the nerves away. His alpha is strong in the air for a second before it completely evaporates. You’re not sure what to say to him. You don’t know if he will start the conversation or not. 
“Do you like the book?” he asks, nodding at the copy of Alice in Wonderland next to you. 
“Dr. Piper gave it to me. I used to read a lot in the bunker,” you say. “Have you read it? It’s about this girl called Alice, she falls down a rabbit hole. I like the cat. I like all the animals actually.” You look up at him.
“I’ve read it before. Drink your tea,” he says. You look down at the cup. You didn’t really think he was the type of person to read. You sip the tea, it’s almost too sweet for you but you don’t want to complain. 
“What kind of books did you have in the bunker?” he asks. 
“Just story books. Have you read Charlotte's Web?” you ask. 
He shakes his head. “I know there’s a film though.” 
You almost spit your tea out. 
“There’s a film?” 
“Yeah. There’s an Alice in Wonderland film too,” he says. You smile. 
“Do you think we could watch them?” you ask, looking over at the TV. 
“Yeah, maybe,” he says. You take another sip of the tea. 
“Do you have a family back in the UK?” Maybe now is better than ever to get some information out of him. Get to know him better. 
“Yeah.” 
“Do you miss them?” you ask. You’re trying to read his eyes at least, since he does such a good job at protecting his scent. He’s almost as good as a trained beta. He’s one of those people who’s just a natural at it.  
“Every day.” There’s sadness in the air now. He turns away from you, upset. You sip your tea again.
“How old were you when Professor Hale took you away?” You’re surprised by the question. 
“I don’t know, 13, I think. My memories before that time, they’re not really there.” You don’t know how to word it. All you could remember from before was your mother and now you’ve learned that was just a memory planted in your head.  
“What do you remember?” he asks, looking back at you. 
“I don’t know. I don’t know what to believe anymore.” You shrug. 
“It must have been hard, being alone.” 
“I’m used to it. I was never really alone. Dr. Piper was always around, or the Professor,” you say, watching his eyes, trying to see if there’s any change. You take in a deep breath but all you can smell is the tea. 
“Do you have any siblings?” you ask. There’s the smell of sadness again. It’s overwhelming. You feel like you can see a change in his eyes, or maybe you’re looking too hard. 
“Why do you care?” he asks, his voice a little harsher than he meant it to be. 
“Sorry, I’m just trying to get to know you.” You sigh looking into your tea. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe he doesn’t want to get to know you. 
“Did you ever go to school?” he asks. You look up at him. He seems more relaxed now. You try to think back, you don’t remember much about school or anything before the bunker. 
“All I remember is what I learned from the bunker. Dr. Piper would teach me things. I don’t remember ever going to school.” You almost laugh at the question. “What about you? Did you go to school?” 
“Yeah. Whenever it rains I think of school,” he says.
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
“I like the rain.” You smile, sipping the tea. You look out the window. It’s bright out. For once, the skies are clear. You hear his chair scraping as he gets up. You see him disappear around the corner down the hallway, and you hear a door open. He comes back around to the table placing a book down. 
“Catch-22?” 
“It might not be your style, but if you’re bored of Alice in Wonderland, it might be a good change.” 
“What is it about?” 
“The war. Like I said, you might not like it.” He shrugs as he sits back down. 
“Thank you. I appreciate it. Thank you.” You smile at him. You wish you could see what he was thinking. 
“Could get you more if you wanted?” 
“Yeah, that would be nice. You don’t have to, though, I know you’re busy. You and John have other things to worry about.” 
“Price likes you, I'm sure he’d sort something out,” he says.
“Do you like me?” you ask. He doesn’t say anything, and his eyes don't tell you what he’s thinking. You can’t help but feel like he doesn’t want to answer. 
The door to the building opens and you turn to see John walk in. You don’t know why that makes you blush. 
“Soap and Gaz are in the pit. Go.” Simon gets up. Your eyes follow him as leaves. John comes to sit next to you. 
“So why have you been skipping meals?” he asks. You look down at your empty mug. 
“I don’t know, I guess I haven’t been paying attention. Sorry.” 
“You need to take better care of yourself.” He sighs. You look up at him nodding. 
“Sorry.” 
“It’s okay, but from now on someone will be coming with you for meals. Lunch and dinner,” he says. You sigh, slouching down in the chair. It’s okay. You don’t really mind. You’ve missed having someone around for lunch. You nod at him. 
“I don’t think Simon likes me,” you say, gripping the book. 
“Simon’s a tough nut to crack. Don’t take it personally.” You nod. You wish he would like you.   
“You would let us know if anything is wrong right? If you don’t want to talk to any of us, you can always talk to Dr. Montgomery,” he says. 
“I know I'm sorry, I’ll do better,” you say. He smiles. 
“Come on, let's get an early lunch then you can take a nap. You probably need it.” He gets up and you smile following after him. 
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Another week goes by. There’s more training with everyone, the same as before with them having to find you blindfolded. They’re getting better and you don’t even need to project your scent any more. John says maybe he’ll look at going somewhere outside the base for drills. Better practice, as you can get more distance from them. Regardless, it sounds like fun. You’re sitting in the lab. It's the weekend so most of the scientists go home. It’s just Dr. Miller and Dr. Piper. Although Dr. Piper is out, it's just you.
“How have you been feeling this week? No more incidents?” he asks. You shake your head. 
“How many of these are left?” you ask as you roll your sleeve up. 
“A few more, then we can move on to stage 2,” he says. You frown, for some reason it hurts this time. 
“Stage 2?” 
“You haven’t been listening have you?” he says frowning as you pull your sleeve back down. 
“Sorry, I know I’ve been tired lately, thanks to the early mornings. It’s hard to sleep at night.” You jump off the stool, looking towards Dr. Piper's office. You wish you could take the sleeping pills, but they make you feel sick. 
“You should start going to bed earlier. Try herbal tea.” You nod at him. Maybe that’s a good idea. 
“Stage 2, that will come when you’re in heat. When do you think that will be?” he asks. You count in your head. 
“Next week, maybe the week after. It doesn’t really work on a timer,” you say. 
“You worried about John’s rut? Alphas can get aggressive,” he says. You feel yourself blushing.
“No, I trust John,” you say, pulling your jacket on. It’s not like you can do anything.
“Well, if you need anything you know where to find me,” he says, turning back to his work. You nod walking out of the lab back to the barracks. It looks like it might rain. You like the rain, the idea of curling up in your nest with a book while you listen to the rain sounds like the best idea right now. When you make it to the barracks you bump into Johnny. 
“Lunch?” he asks. You nod, looking at the time. It’s almost 1 o’clock. His arm wraps around your shoulders. 
“What have you been doing today?” he asks. 
“Nothing really,” you say. There hasn’t been any training today, you’ve been stuck inside all day. 
“I have a story to tell you about Gaz slapping a drill sergeant's ass,” he says. You chuckle. “See he thought it was Si’s ass, until the guy turned around.” 
“Are you sure it wasn’t you who did that?” You laugh as you walk into the mess hall. 
“Why, what did you hear?” You smile, picking up a tray.
“Sounds like something you’d do, not Kyle.” 
“You don’t know what I'm capable of.” He nudges you. You fill your plate up with food and two puddings, it’s chocolate again. You both make your way over to an empty table. There’s a few people around but not as many as usual. You keep making small talk with Johnny. If there is something Johnny is always good at, it’s filling dead air. You never feel alone when he’s around. Halfway through eating a new group of soldiers comes through and for some reason they make you nervous, taking seats at a table behind Johnny. 
“Is that her?”
You feel sick. The pit in your stomach isn’t going away. You can hear them laughing, you know Johnny can hear them too he sits up in his seat. 
“Is this why you’ve been skipping meals?” He asks, you shake your head pushing the food around your plate. You don’t want to eat anymore, not even the pudding. You feel embarrassed. You wish you could just curl up in a ball and vanish. 
“Would you?”
“What risk discharge for her?” 
“No, she needs bigger tits.” 
“Bigger ass too.”  
Laughter follows. You really try to ignore it, digging your nails into your palm. It's almost like you can only hear that table now, the group of 5. What if you’re not good enough? What if John thinks these things? If there was another omega would he pick her? You don’t remember standing up or running past them, you just feel the cool outside air hit your face.
You don’t wait for Johnny, just rush over to the barracks. Your head is pounding as you burst through the door rushing straight over to John’s office. You’re ignoring everything around you, tears streaming down your face as you knock on his door. You barely even hear him say come in before you open the door. John looks over his desk at you, as soon as he sees you he gets out his chair. 
“What's wrong? Where’s Johnny?” he asks, putting his hands on your shoulders trying to look you in your eyes. You can't talk, you're too worked up, you're just sobbing in front of him. This isn’t helping, he probably thinks you're being so stupid. You hear people talking behind you as John squeezes your shoulders. His alpha is strong in the air. You're making him upset. You’re being a bad omega.
“What happened?” John asks someone behind you.
“Some rookies in the mess saying some not nice things.” It’s Johnny. John sighs, pulling you onto his chest wrapping his arms around you. 
“Take Gaz, get me names,” he says. You don't hear Johnny reply but you hear the door close.
“Come sit,” he says, guiding you over to the sofa. You sit down as he reaches over to his desk pulling out some tissues.
“I’m sorry.” You sniffle taking the tissue.
“No need to be sorry. What did they say?” he asks, his scent still strong in the air. You turn to look at him trying to compose yourself. Don’t be a problem.
“Nothing, just stupid stuff,” you say, wiping your nose. 
“Come on, let's go for a walk,” he says, offering his hand. You nod, brushing the tears away and taking his hand. He walks you back out the base to the dirt path just like last time. As soon as the base is outside of earshot you let out a long breath and breathe in the forest air. It smells of pine and damp wood. Now that you know there’s a lake here your ears are hypertuned to pick up the sounds of the lapping water. John's hand comes to the small of your back. 
“I’m sorry I haven’t been around much,” he says. 
“It’s okay, I know you’re busy,” you reply.
“You’ve been doing a great job helping out with all the training,” he says. You smile. 
“It’s been fun.” You’re not sure what to say. You don’t want to think about training right now, you don’t want to think about the work with Dr. Miller. You like spending time alone with John. You lean against him, his scent filling your nose as you walk around to the lake. You smile, closing your eyes letting the breeze wash over you. You’ve calmed down now, the whole thing just felt like you’ve blown it out of proportion. John moves behind you wrapping his arms around you, his hands resting on your hips. Pulling you up against him, you can feel his breathing as you lean back. His scent is calming, it complements the smells of nature. 
“Do you want to talk?” he asks after a few minutes. You let out a breath. Your eyes are still stinging from the crying. 
“If there was another omega, a better omega, would you rather be with her than me?” you ask him. 
“What? No, why would you even think that?” 
“I don’t know. I’m not exactly the perfect omega,” you say, digging your shoe in the dirt. 
He turns you in his arms so you’re face to face. “All I want is for you to be safe and happy. To do that we need to communicate,” he says. His eyes are kind. You don’t want to lie to him, but you want to upset him even less. You breathe in his scent letting it calm you. 
“I am happy,” you say. One of his hands comes to your chin, forcing you to look up at him. He hums, looking around your face. You smile up at him. He leans down and kisses you. You close your eyes, sinking into the kiss, letting his tongue press against yours. You don’t know if you’re getting any better at kissing or not, but he doesn’t complain. His hands running down your body pulling you closer to him. He pulls away, one of his hands brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. 
“You’re so beautiful, my beautiful perfect omega.” His thumb brushes your cheek. You smile at the praise, it makes you feel all warm inside. It’s high praise from your alpha, you can tell he means it. It makes you project your scent more for him. You can’t help it, the sweet smell of strawberries cutting through the smells of nature. He smiles back at you as his nostrils flare, breathing you in.
“Can I ask you something?” you ask, nerves welling up inside you, your mouth feeling suddenly dry. He nods. 
“I want to have sex with you before my heat.” You feel yourself blushing. He smiles at you, kissing your forehead. 
"Are you sure?” he asks. You look up in his eyes, his beautiful kind eyes. You nod. 
“Okay then, we can figure something out.”  You press your face into his chest wrapping your arms around him. 
“Are you worried about your heat?” he asks. You pull your head out his chest so you can look at him. 
“I’m not worried. I know this time will be different, but I trust you.” You smile at him. You’ve never had someone you trust with you during your heats. You know people have been involved, and you’re lucky you remember so little. It’s not that you don’t remember it. It’s suppressed memories, or at least that’s what Dr. Piper calls them. It’s the nightmares that get you the most, reminding you were just a plaything for the Professor. 
“Are you nervous?” you ask. 
“No,” he says. It’s what you needed to hear. You’re not worried, he’s not worried. He’s your alpha and he’ll take care of you. You step up on your toes and kiss him. His arms pull you closer to him. There’s a cold breeze that makes the hairs stand up on the back of your neck. You can feel the first drops of rain. You don’t care, you want to stay in this forest forever with John. 
“C’mon we should get back before it rains,” he says, breaking away from the kiss. 
“I like the rain,” you say, keeping your arms wrapped around him. He chuckles, prying your arms off him. You move to the side of him gripping his waist. 
“John, what made you agree to claim me?” you ask as you make it back to the dirt road. 
“There's a connection I can’t explain. I know you and Dr. Montgomery say it's just biology but I think there's something more.” 
“Really?” 
“If it was just chemicals then it would be more like a need, something my body is missing. It doesn’t explain other feelings like, love or—”
“Love?” You stop your fingers gripping his waist. You look up at him, confused. Love?  
“Love, patience, caring.” He turns to look at you, his thumb brushing your cheek. 
“How do you know it’s love and not just chemicals?” you ask. You don’t know what love feels like or what it smells like. You try to smell the air but you just smell nature, pine, damp wood and hints of wild herbs in the air. You can smell John’s scent too but nothing new. You don’t even know if you can feel love. 
“Love is something you feel, it’s this feeling of wanting to care for someone, maybe more than you want to care for yourself. I think it’s more than just chemicals.” He pulls you closer to him and you keep walking. 
“I don’t think I’ve ever felt that before,” you admit. You think about Dr. Piper, and the Professor. The only two people who have been constants in your life, always there for good and for bad. Love for you is just something you’ve read about in books. People do stupid things for the people they love. You look up at John, his arm wrapped around your waist. He’s a good alpha, you want to believe it's more than just chemicals, more than just the biological need to find and mate with an omega. 
You wish you knew what love feels like so you would know too, if it was more than chemicals. You walk back in silence. You like spending time with John, you like feeling his hands on you, his touch, his kisses. Maybe it is love. You shake the thought away as you walk up to the barracks. When you walk into the building you see Kate, you almost don’t recognise her with her back turned but as soon as the door opens she’s looking at you both. 
“Where have you been!” she snaps. She doesn’t sound angry, just worried. 
“Kate? I thought you were supposed to be in Langley?” he says, his arm dropping from your back. She looks over at you then at John. You see Kyle and Johnny stood behind her, they look worried too. Their scent is thick in the air and it's making you nervous.
“It’s Shepard, he’s on his way here. He knows about the omega and he wants to take her.” She says. You’re holding your breath. 
“What? Take her where?” John asks. 
“Back to Professor Hale.” 
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Next Dividers by Plum98 & gild-ui My rock rememberwren <3
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lyrinsluv · 4 months ago
Text
9:28pm
timeskip! kenma x reader
☆゚.*・。゚
wordcount: 671! :D 
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being the partner of a streamer — kenma kozume — was amazing, but it also had its downfalls. i mean, it’s not in every relationship where both parties respect the fact that one doesn’t have enough time for the other. kenma was always streaming, always sitting in his office on phone calls and with him being the head of a huge company, it didn’t help you at all. you missed your boyfriend. you enjoyed the soft whispers and praises you gave him as he fell asleep on you. that was the only time you two had together: the ten minutes you both cherished before you both dozed off. 
you walk into your shared home, dropping your work bag in the front as you slip off your shoes. you wanted to tell kenma something. as you were heading back from work, you remembered a little something your coworker told you. she was giddy about some firework show that was happening in her local park. it was nice that you two lived a couple minutes away from each other. she didn’t convince you fully. you wanted to go with kenma. you truly did. 
you don’t announce that you’re home by the worry that he’s streaming or in a meeting. you knock on his door, and you smile at the soft ‘come in’ he says. you practically jump as you walk in, but you contain yourself.
“ken, can i ask you something?” you ask as you lean on his desk, your smile still eminent on your face. he gives you a nod, his gaze looking up at you from his screen.
“can.. we go somewhere? in thirty minutes? it’ll.. um, it’ll be a surprise. you can wear whatever.” you say in a hopeful tone. you missed your boyfriend. you missed the little dates you had when he first started university. you look into his eyes with a somewhat longing gaze, hoping that he’d agree. 
and he did. 
“mm.. okay, i’m free tonight anyways.” he said in a somewhat soft manner. the joy that spread across your face spoke volumes for him. 
it was 9:28pm, and now you two were sitting on some damp grass with a blanket over the two of you. you lean your head on his shoulder. it felt so.. warm. you knew he hated displaying affection in public sometimes, but he let it go for you.
“i still don’t know what we’re doing, y’know..” he murmured quietly as he looked at you. the adoring look in his eyes made your stomach twist into knots. 
“you’ll see.” you whispered as the clock hit nine-thirty. and that was when the first firework started up. you didn’t even tell your coworker that you were there. the quiet chuckle he let out made you smile. you gave him a peck on his neck and you let out a soft sigh. 
“what? i know it’s corny, but i haven’t seen you in a while. this is the closest thing we’ll get to a date.” you mumble back as you snuggle into him. 
he let out another quiet chuckle and he didn’t respond. it felt odd at most, but when you saw his gaze, everything changed. he looked up at each firework like it was a work of art; his eyes lighting up at every pop and glimmer he sees. you couldn’t help but stare at him. 
your boyfriend looked beautiful. 
“thank you.” he whispered as his gaze turned to yours, the two of you practically staring at each other now. you smile and you turn your body to sit up straight at him. 
“yeah, baby. any time. i love you.” you say softly. you knew the night ended well because the ten minutes together that you usually spent before bed lasted an hour. it was a somewhat lazy night, but you both enjoyed it dearly. 
you knew the night was basically perfect because of his eyes. his gaze was still so bright and affectionate even after the show.
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nadvs · 4 months ago
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can i request for the swte universe in their college days, reader seems like a perfectionist to me so what if she failed on an exam or she didn't get there in time and she failed her class and she got really upset, feeling terrible about herself, very disappointed and rafe tries to uplift her mood, trying to get her out of her dorm room?🤍🤍🤍
omg yessss i always love your prompts 🥹
based on this fic
» au masterlist
she had a bad feeling about the midterm. sometimes she could tell when she was being too hard on herself, when she was catastrophizing, but she knew she wasn’t exaggerating when she told rafe that her mind went blank during the test and that she’s sure she failed.
now, as she sits in her dorm checking her grade on her laptop the night after, she gets the confirmation.
she texts her boyfriend, just like she did when they were best friends and told each other everything. i was right.
her phone starts buzzing with a phone call.
“you okay?” he says when she picks up. he remembers that her grade was supposed to be posted tonight.
“no,” she says with a defeated laugh.
rafe is with the guys, watching a game at the house. he stands up off the couch, holding his phone to his ear. one of his housemates points to the screen, eyebrow raised, clearly confused why rafe would leave when there’s a minute left in an intense game.
but he ignores him, rounding the corner to pace into the hallway. he leans back against a wall, arm crossed over his chest.
“how bad is it?” he asks.
“so bad that i’m working on an email to my prof to ask if i can retake it or do anything for extra credit,” she says. “i didn’t even pass.”
he can hear the panic in her voice. rafe chews on his thumbnail as he stares down at the floor.
“it’s not over,” he says. he realizes he sounds just like he does when he’s trying to motivate his teammates between periods during a rough game. he rethinks his approach. this isn’t a game. this is his girl. and she’s freaked out about her future.
“baby, it happens,” he says. “everyone fails at some point.”
“this is so bad,” she mumbles. “i’m so stupid.”
he grimaces. they’re basically the same person. he knows how much pressure she puts on herself. sometimes, he’s almost certain that she thinks she has to be perfect to be worth something, just like he does.
“where are you?” he asks.
“home.” her inhale is shaky. “i shouldn’t have stayed up late studying so much. i thought it’d be better to learn what i could, but running on barely any sleep must’ve messed me up.”
“send the email,” he says. “and be ready in half an hour, okay?”
she’s quiet for a moment.
“why?”
“because i know you’re gonna sit in your room all night, beating yourself up, thinking about what you should’ve done and there’s no point to any of it,” he says. “just be ready, alright?”
moments like these, she’s glad her boyfriend is so bossy and decisive. her head is such a mess right now, somehow feeling both chaotic and blank at the same time.
rafe texts when he arrives. when she settles in his passenger seat, he can see that she’s been crying. he shuts off his music and gently pulls her in, his palm at the back of her neck, so that she’ll nuzzle into his chest.
it’s his go-to move when she’s upset. it always works. after crying against him for a moment, her breaths start to even out.
he kisses her forehead, his hand running up and down her back. he hates this feeling, when she’s so stressed out and he’s utterly powerless.
“you’re not stupid,” he mumbles against her hair.
“i am. i’m so disappointed in myself,” she says, her voice brittle. “how could i fuck up this bad?”
he frowns. he knows her well enough by now. sometimes she needs tough love. sometimes it’s the only thing that’ll pull her out of her haze.
“it happened,” he says. he pulls back just enough so she can look up at him. “can you change that it happened?”
“no.”
“is calling yourself stupid going to fix it?”
“no.”
“that’s my girl you’re talking to,” he says, his blue eyes sweeping over her face in worry. “my girl isn’t stupid.”
her lips twist in sorrow, but she nods, eyelids fluttering. she spirals sometimes. she can tell she’s doing it right now.
rafe’s hand rests on her damp cheek, rubbing his thumb over her skin.
“you anxious?” he asks.
“very,” she replies.
so, he decides to see if his most effective way of cooling down when he’s wired will help her.
he pulls into a lot by an outdoor court he always sees on his drive to her campus and takes the basketball out of his trunk when he parks.
“this is kind of unfair,” she says lightheartedly when she gets out of his car into the cool night air. “no chance i’m winning a one-on-one against you.”
“we’re just shooting hoops,” he says, putting an arm around her as he holds the ball to his chest.
the court is empty and quiet and dimly lit. they stand below one of the nets, bouncing the ball back and forth between each other.
“what if i fail the course?” she says.
“you won’t.”
“but if i do?”
“if you do, you’ll survive,” rafe replies. “you think some class can take you down?”
she breathes a chuckle. when she gets the ball back, she holds it, standing across from him, staring. all they ever are with each other is honest. it’s how it’s always been.
“i’m scared,” she admits. “i’m scared this will throw off my timing and i won’t graduate when i want to.”
“baby, there’s no way that’s happening,” he says confidently. “one bad grade won’t do that.”
“you seem so sure,” she states. she bounces the ball back to him.
“here. if i make this, it means you’ll fail the course.”
he takes the ball in both hands, holds it over his head, and throws it so it hits the rim hard, making the whole backboard shake as the ball goes flying down the court.
“i think that was rigged,” she says, the ache in her chest loosening as she laughs.
“we’ll never know,” rafe half-shouts as he runs to pick up the ball. he bounces it back to her.
she dribbles it a few times, squaring up with the net, and launches the ball in the air. it falls in the net.
“nice,” he breathes. “don’t let my coach see you. he’ll replace me.”
she turns to look at him, mirroring his smile.
“you’re laying it on a little thick, cameron,” she teases. she’s touched that he’s being so sweet just to cheer her up.
“just telling it like it is,” he says. he passes the ball to her again. “let’s see how you do with some defense.”
he steps between her and the net, a hard wall against her. his hands find her hips as she tries to line up with the net, his big frame moving with her.
“i’m pretty sure that’s a technical foul,” she says. “you can’t touch me like that.”
“nah, that’s not a rule.”
“you can’t just decide that,” she laughs.
“such a tight-ass,” he scoffs with a smirk, taking his hands off her hips and cradling her face. “how about this? this allowed?”
she giggles, holding the ball in one hand and hooking the other around his neck to pull him closer. their lips touch tenderly, both of them expelling a quiet sigh of contentment under the kiss.
she pulls back. he’s too busy staring at her in awe to block her from making another shot.
“your defense sucks,” she teases. rafe puts his hand to his chest in mock outrage.
“now you’re trash-talking?” he says. she watches him pick up the ball. he makes it look so effortless, the net swishing as the ball whizzes through it.
she’s seen him on the court so many times before, but she never tires of the sight, always so struck by how skilled he is.
they play for another twenty minutes, talking and taking turns shooting hoops, until she finally feels too tired to keep going. and she realizes she hasn’t thought about her failed midterm the entire time.
“thank you,” she says as they settle in his car. “i feel better. sweaty, but better.”
“it always works. just gotta burn your energy on something else so you can’t use it stressing out.”
“smart,” she says. “i’ll keep that in mind when i take your spot on the team.”
“i’m not so sure about that anymore,” he says. “you take fucking forever to throw. you’d run out the shot clock every time.”
she laughs, thinking about how many times in the last twenty minutes she kept the ball in her hands while she got lost in conversation with him.
she playfully shoves him, but he takes her hand and pulls her in, meeting her in a slow kiss.
“listen, i don’t want to hear the word stupid come out of your mouth again,” he mumbles. “not when you’re talking about yourself. i’m serious.”
she looks down at her lap, exhaling slowly. she knows he’s right. there’s no reason for her to bully herself so mercilessly.
“okay.”
“and please, baby,” he says solemnly, his tone deep as if he’s about to say something serious, “throw the ball faster next time.”
“i hate you,” she laughs, shoving him again. he smirks at her, putting the car in drive.
rafe has felt proud of himself a few times in his life, mostly with his athletic achievements, but he thinks that hearing her laugh, knowing he’s the one who made her feel better, is the proudest he’s ever felt.
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