moody-alcoholic

[moody-alcoholic]

WIP Wedensday

Here's a little snippet from that fourth wing x COD crossover I mentioned. I'm not going to dedicate 100% of my time to it until after These Violent Delights has finished. Plus, it still needs a name...

Regardless enjoy this very small snippet and happy Wedensday! <3

___

You’re not supposed to be here. 

You’re a healer, you are not supposed to be here. 

Yet you are here - stood in the cold lined up as the last of the volunteers work their way across The Parapet. They got to go first, you’re not sure if that's better or worse. All you know is you shouldn’t be here. It’s not like you can just leave though, you look behind you at the rest of the Healers who were picked by the random lottery.

You never have been lucky. 

An ear piercing scream fills the air and your head whips around to see a mass of pale blue break through the fog. Then it’s gone. Your stomach jumps, you force yourself to swallow so you don’t vomit. You’ve scraped many bodies from under The Parapet, most of the time parents want them back to bury, for some though the ground below you will be their last resting place. 

It’ll be yours too if you don’t focus.

Heights have always been something you’ve avoided, even climbing the turrets in the collage is enough to get your heart pounding in your chest and your palms going sweaty. For some reason though you’re strangely calm, your heart is steady and your palms are dry. Maybe it’s the fact that you can't see the 200 foot drop that's currently concealed by low fog. 

There are only 2 more people in front of you then it will be your turn, your turn to die. You know you’re going to die. Maybe not on The Parapet but at some point - you’re not supposed to be here. You were 12 months away from graduating and now you’re about to cross the 18 inch wide stone bridge to what will probably be your inevitable death. 

Maybe that’s why you’re so calm. You’ve accepted your fate. 

The person in front of you is given the go ahead to walk, you watch as he holds his arms out and steadily steps onto the narrow stone bridge. If you can even call it a bridge, you step up and give your name to the scribe and she nods at you. You look at the rider in black flight leathers who stands cross armed at the exit.  

“Remember, no lesser magic.” He says. You’re pretty sure he’s reminding anyone not just you but you nod and swallow the fear quickly working its way through your body. The rule feels pointless, it’s supposed to level the playing field and make it fair. Like anything in the Riders Quadrant is fair. You’ve spent the last 2 years patching up enough riders to know there are no rules when it comes to fairness. 

Everyone who has been picked for this program - or volunteered - are third years, you’ve all had plenty of practice with lesser magic. It still makes no sense though, what are you going to use it for? To shield your 200 foot fall? There’s not a shield powerful enough in the whole of Navarre that could help survive that. 

“Next.” The Rider orders, now he’s talking to you. You’re frozen in place though, just staring at the part of the building that’s crumbled away to nothing leaving only the dark stone of The Parapet stretching out above a sea of fog. 

“Cadet!” He snaps. It makes you jump, and you look at him. 

“Move.” He orders. You nod, you’re not sure why, it’s automatic. You don’t care though because there is no way you’re surviving this. You pull the strings on your backpack tight and take the first step out towards The Parapet - towards your death.

___

[moody-alcoholic]

These Violent Delights

Chapter 19 - Bonus

Summary: poly 141 x fem!reader, a/b/o AU. WC: 2.4k

CW: smut, oral (M reciving), sprinkle of angst.

TVD masterlist - next bonus

Enjoy <3

Simon scoots closer to John. It’s been a long few days, it’s been hard on John the most. Simon doesn’t need to smell him to know how tense he’s been. Right now though he’s trying to keep his emotions in check. 

He watches as John turns the TV up a little louder and shuffles. Your moans seem to be echoing through the house, the sounds of sex and the smell of vanilla reaches all the way down to the living room.

You sound like you’re having a good time, he knows Johnny and Kyle will be. It’s good, you need this, they all needed this really. Simon looks over at John, he can see the bulge in his pants, it makes Simon’s cock harden too. 

He reaches over resting his hand on the back of John’s neck. John tenses but tips his head back slightly, letting out a sigh. 

“You’re tense.” Simon says squeezing his fingers against the base of John’s skull. 

“So are you.” John retorts back. Simon scoffs.

“I can keep it in my pants though.” He lies, resting his other hand on John’s thigh. John hums, Simon doesn’t stop as your moans pick up again. He can hear Johnny too, he’s always loud when he’s having sex, used to be a problem when they were sneaking around. 

Not so much anymore, people don’t tend to question an SAS officer, least of all Ghost. Simon’s hand runs up to John's crotch, he looks at John who’s head turns. Simon presses his forehead against John’s and projects his scent filing the space with a mix of alpha and vanilla. 

As soon as Simon’s hand moves over to John’s cock he locks his lips onto Simon’s. The kiss is feverish, messy and desperate. Simon squeezes John’s cock, his own almost bursting out his sweatpants. Your moans sound muffled now, maybe you’re sucking one of their cocks. 

Simon moans in John’s mouth as he imagines your perfect mouth around his cock. He imagines what you will look like as he hits the back of your throat and tears fall down your face. He’ll catch them all and brush them out the way. 

“Simon.” John breathes, breaking from the kiss.

“Want me to stop?” Simon asks, their foreheads still pressed together. 

“No.” John says, Simon smiles and kisses him again quickly before slipping off the sofa. John shuffles his pants and boxers down slightly, enough so he can get his cock out. It’s instant relief when he does, letting out a long moan and smearing precum down his length. 

The smell of vanilla is strong now, it makes his head spin as Simon reaches over to take his cock in his hand. John cups his face brushing his cheek with his thumb. 

“Look so pretty down there.” John says. 

“Anything for you, sir.” Simon says, it makes John’s cock twitch. It’s rare Simon and John get time together. Usually it’s when one or the other needs some release but ever since Johnny and Kyle joined they’ve always had another option. John misses it though, misses him and the little moments they would have together. 

Simon locks his mouth around John’s tip, he tips his head back on the sofa as Simon takes him all the way into his mouth. 

“Fuck.” John breathes. He can hear you moaning again, Kyle too, the sounds go straight to his cock twitching in Simon’s mouth. Simon moans, sending vibrations up John's spine. He wishes it was you. He’s never had you suck his cock before, he can imagine how soft your lips are, how gentle your tongue would be. 

Not like Simon who sucks him like he’s trying to suck the life out of him. Not that he minds right now, he moans as Simon squeezes around the base of his cock. It's rough and needy, hearing you call out and moan, the wet sounds of sex that have been travelling though the house have got them both worked up. 

You’re part of the pack but you’re John’s omega really, you have his mark and even though he trusts John and Kyle he can still feel jealous. Especially because he’s barely so much as touched you over the past month, at least you’re close by. According to Dr. Montgomery's notes you being away from an alpha for an extended period of time would be bad for all of you. 

Just thinking about you has his cock throbbing. He reaches down to run his hand through Simon’s hair. 

“Fuck Si, mouth feels so good.” He says pressing him down deep on his cock before removing his hand so he can breathe. Simon pulls his mouth off his cock stroking it with his hand. 

“Bet hers feels even better.” He says with a cheeky smile and a shine in his eyes. Fuck, Simon has his mouth back on John before he can say anything. This time Simon presses his tongue on the underside of his cock, taking him all the way letting his tip hit the back of his throat. 

Christ, Simon’ll be the death of him one day. John’s toes curl as chases the peak, Simon can feel it on him by the way he presses himself deeper into the sofa. John reaches out for Simon’s head running his 

hands through his hair. 

“Yeah, she’s got such a pretty mouth, such soft lips.” John babbles as the sound of your moans cut straight through him. He’s not going to be able to keep this up and Simon seems to sense that gripping the base of John's cock and squeezing.   

All he can think about is your lips wrapped around his cock. The pretty little noises you would make as you try to take him deeper with each bob of your head. He can imagine how good it would feel to have your moans sending vibrations up his body. 

“Fu-” It’s the only quick warning he can give before he comes. Simon presses his mouth deep on John letting his spend hit the back of his throat. Your moaning is still echoing in the house and John’s ears as he relaxes in the come down. Simon’s mouth is gentle on his cock as he removes his mouth. 

“Needed that?” Simon asks with a raised eyebrow. All John can do is nod in response. Simon stands up, dropping his pants and holding his cock in his hand, he tugs a few times before taking a closer step to John who wraps his hands around Simon’s thighs. 

“My turn.” He says with a smile on his lips. 

You’re practically glowing when you come into the living room with Johnny. 

“Sit here!” Kyle calls, patting the spot next to him. You smile and walk over, John's eyes linger on you but you don’t look at him. He can smell you, the scent of strawberries makes his head spin. Hairs stand up on the back of his neck. He’s not sure how much longer he’ll be able to keep this up for. 

Maybe Kyle’s right and he should initiate the conversation he knows you need to have. He turns his attention back to the game, not that he cares about either team. Kyle starts explaining how the game works to you and Johnny comes back in with two bowls of food, handing one to you. 

“Who’s winning?” Johnny asks before falling into the chair next to Simon. Simon goes on a rant about the teams while you eat your food. John knows you don’t understand anything he’s saying but you still watch him and listen intently while he winds Johnny up. You giggle when Johnny gets particularly red faced defending the team playing. 

When halftime happens everyone leaves to take a piss or get another drink. John glances over at you when he comes back from the bathroom and you smile at him while Kyle hands you a beer. At least that might help you relax, or understand the rules better. Kyle’s arm goes back around his back and he digs his thumb into John’s tight shoulder. 

The rest of the game goes as expected; Johnny’s team wins. Simon winds him up but then everyone gives each other silent glances.

“Another?” Kyle asks you as Johnny and Simon head to the kitchen. John watches them all leave, they’re giving John a chance alone with you. He can smell your nerves in the air, but it’s quickly replaced with his alpha. He’s not quite sure how it works but if you’re nervous or sad then his scent almost latches on to you. 

You turn and smile at him, he smiles back but waits to see if you want to make a move. 

“Can I lay on your lap?” You ask, quietly. His smile grows bigger, he lets out a sigh of relief. Yes, he wants nothing more than for you to lay on his lap again. 

“Sure.” He says he doesn’t want to be too eager and spook you. You slowly shuffle over to him then pull your legs up onto the sofa and rest your head on his legs. The moment you do he feels his whole body relax, your scent fills his nose and he relaxes further into the sofa. 

You’re safe, you’re calm and you’re surrounded by your pack.

You shiver, pulling your legs closer to your body. “Cold?” He asks pulling one of the throws off the back of the couch and lays it over you. John projects his scent and you breathe it in relaxing even more. He’s not sure where to touch you, he wants to touch his mark but maybe it’s too soon. He wants to touch his mark but instead he rests his hand on your shoulder instead giving you a gentle squeeze. 

She doesn’t try and stop him, he moves slowly up to your hair. He runs his hand across your head pulling a strand of hair behind your ear. John can see the red marks Johnny and Kyle have left over your neck. You tip your head forward slightly and he can see his mark on the back of your neck. He wants to touch it but continues to stroke your hair instead.

“What do you think is going to happen now?” You ask, his hand pauses for a second. 

“With what?” He asks, waiting for you to bring the subject up first. 

“We’ll figure something out,” he says. He sees you smile, little do you know they’ve had a lot of time to talk over this past month. It was Simon who bought it up first and they all quickly agreed. They don’t care if there is a cure or not. You are more important than any of this. 

They have a plan, they have a gift and a way to make this Christmas special for you. They’re going to let you know they love you and no matter what they’re sticking by your side, cure or no cure. Now it is about you healing because that is what you need right now. 

His thumb brushes over his mark and you close your eyes letting out a long breath. 

“I promise I’ll be a better omega.” You say, Johnny can hear the strain in your voice - the guilt. 

“Shh, you don't have to promise anything. You try your best, you do your best. I don't expect anything more from you.” He replies, you shouldn’t feel guilty for anything. You are perfect. John’s words catch in his throat as Kyle pokes his head around the corner. John smiles and gestures for him to leave. Kyle smiles, holding his thumb up and sneaking back out the room. 

“You were always there. Even when I hated you you never left my side.” You open your eyes hearing the door close. John rests his hand on the back of your neck feeling the families indents of his teeth on your skin. 

“Of course. I will always be there.”

“Even if I hated you?” you ask. He lets out a little scoff, there’s nothing in the world that would ever 

make him leave your side. 

“Even if you hated me,” he says, going back to stroking your hair. 

“Thank you.” You say, he watches you relax resting one of your hands on his knee. You look so beautiful as you relax off to sleep, John continues to stroke your hair, his other hand rests against the top of your head. After a whole month of no contact you still came back to him.

He wants the moment to last forever, he doesn’t want to move you while you're curled up next to him like this. He could not have pictured you any more perfect then you are right now. He’s not sure how long it’s been when Johnny silently slips into the room, it’s hard to keep track of time when you do this for him. 

Johnny scoops you up in his arms to take you to bed. To John’s bed where he’s going to hold you all night long and never let you go again. Possessiveness takes over him making hairs rise on the back of his neck. He rubs it as you murmur wrapping your arms around Johnny’s neck. 

“I laid in John’s lap.” You say your voice is filled with sleep but John can hear the pride behind it too. It must have been a big thing for you to decide to forgive him. 

“Yeah ya did.” Johnny whispers as they both creep past the other rooms. You hum and you don’t protest as Johnny helps you get into John’s bed. John steps into the room watching you turn over to face the empty side of the bed. 

“We’ll deal with tomorrow, take your time with her, yeah?” Johnny whispers leaning in close so only John can hear. 

“Thanks. For everything.” John replies. Johnny smiles patting him on the shoulder before leaving. John drops his sweatpants and climbs into bed with you. You reach out for him before he gets a chance to lay down properly, he smiles again and pulls you up onto his chest. His hand lands on your back where he can feel each breath you take. 

“I’ve missed you.” You mumble, John can hear the sleep dragging you back down. 

“I know, I missed you too.” He says, he sees you smile slightly. A few seconds later your body is completely relaxed, your breathing has slowed and your arm drops from his chest. He kisses the top of your head and rubs your back as you sleep. 

And that's all he does for the next few hours - watches his omega happy and content sleeping in his arms again.  

Chapter 19 - Next bonus

Dividers by Plum98 & gild-ui

[moody-alcoholic]

I can't believe I'm writing this. I just can't shake this idea.

So it's a fourth wing/COD crossover...

You're a healer, that's all you're meant to be. But then Basgiath decides that this year every section of every wing must have a healer assigned to it.

At first they let people from the healer quadrant volunteer, but it wasn't enough and they had to do a lottery to randomly select the remaining numbers.

And your number came up.

Turns out you're about to spend your final year of graduation fighting to survive in the riders quadrant.

Second wing, claw section surrounded by third and second years who earned their place here. You are an outcast, a healer 12 months away from graduation and afraid of heights.

To make things worse, second wing is lead by an ex-infantry captain who was bonded by a dragon mid battle. His second in command is a mysterious skull mask wearing executive officer who bonded to the only white dragon to be born in a millennium.

Humans believe a white dragon is a mark of good luck. Dragons believe it's a bad omen.

And then there is Johnny the bubbly claw section leader and his second in command Gaz who make up the 3 ex-infantry soldiers captain Price insisted on bringing with him to the riders quadrant.

You and the rest of the chosen healers have one year to do what a rider completes in 3. Just because you're from a different quadrant does not mean the rules have changed. And with war on the horizon your section may be dependent on you sooner rather then later.

But for now your job is to stay alive and survive the Threshing. Because it doesn't matter if you were a year away from graduating if you're dead.

Oh yeah of course it's poly 141 X Reader. Did you even need to ask?

I wish I could say this was a baby of an idea but I'm 3 chapters in...

I haven't even finished the book series and I didn't even like the first book that much but man this idea has me in a chokehold.

[moody-alcoholic]

Cross My Heart

Chapter 9 - Self Sacrifice

Summary: poly141 x reader. WC: 6.8k Original abridged version HERE

CW: +18 MDNI explicit content. Sex, threesome kind of (MMF), fingering, interrupted sex kinda, PiV sex, use of weapons, death, canon typical violence, angst, injuries, hurt/comfort.

AN: We are now caught up with the minific. Everything from this point onward will be new chapters!

Previous - masterlist - next AO3

Enjoy <3

“Ghost! We need that door open now!” Price shouts as he turns. Gaz comes over to the window in the door. 

“On the console, there should be a green switch. Try flipping it.” He says. You nod heaving as the fresh oxygen in the room slowly gets replaced with whatever gas is being pumped in. Finding the green switch is harder than you think. The gas is stinging your eyes now, they fill with water and you have to keep brushing tears out of the way with your free hand. 

It feels like you’re looking forever, your fingers running over every button and switch. You finally find it blinking a few times to get the tears out your eyes before flipping it. The switch clicks and the hissing stops. You regain your composure, you cough breathing in big gulps of air. 

Your hand squeezes your vest then you hear coughing. You look over at the window. You see Price cough, you can hear the others start too. You look back at the console. 

It’s you or them. Fuck.  

Your eyes lock onto Price as you wipe the tears from your face. Fuck . This was going to suck. You can’t let them die though. You move back over to the green switch. You hesitate, a few days ago they wouldn’t have thought twice about doing this - letting you die. 

Now, things are different. The sound of their coughing fills your ears. You can’t do this, you can’t listen to them suffer. You can’t let them die. 

“Dont, you dare!” Price shouts between coughs. You look over at him. 

You flick the switch. There’s a few seconds of silence then the hissing starts up again. The smell of chemicals fill the room making your eyes sting, slowly their coughing stops as yours starts up again. 

“NO!” Price shouts, you look over at him, your hand comes up to your nose and mouth. It doesn’t matter though. You move away from the console and towards the door. 

“Can’t let you die.” You wheeze, your eyes are stinging, you can barely see him now. You think back to the kiss, the sex. You wipe your eyes, looking past Price but you can’t see anything. 

“Ghost. That door needs to be opened!” You hear Price shout. “Gaz, is there anything you can do?” 

“I’m trying!” You hear Gaz shout. Your lungs are burning now, there’s not much clean air in the room, your head is starting to spin. You can’t tell if it’s the poison or the lack of oxygen. It doesn’t matter. They’re safe. 

Your hand drops from your face and you smile at him. For a second your eyes clear, you can see his face, his hand pressed up against the glass. You reach up and press your hand against his. You swear you can feel the heat from the other side of the door. 

“Price.” You cough, pressing your body against the door to hold yourself upright. You don’t know how much time you have. You don’t expect them to save you, but if they don’t get out you’ll haunt them from the beyond. The thought makes you chuckle which throws you into a coughing fit. 

“GAZ!” You hear Price shout. You slam your hand against the glass and he turns back to look at you. It’s not Gaz’s fault, it’s no one’s fault. You hear banging, pounding against metal.

“Price. Thank you.” 

“John, and you can thank me later.” He says, you smile, coughing. There’s not going to be a later. You can’t hold yourself up for much longer black spots flash in your vision. 

“Got it!” You hear Ghost shout. You try to take a breath in but you can’t panic rises in you and your legs give way. You fall to the floor looking up at the gas coming in through the vents. 

You die and they live. It was how it’s supposed to end. Ever since the beginning when they were going to put a bullet in your head. Maybe it’s fate or something. It feels like a fitting end. You let out one last long breath before everything goes black.

…

Price is holding his breath as your body slides down to the floor. He watches you go limp against the door. He wants to tear it off, they need to get you out of there. Suddenly there’s a wiring sound and the gas in the room starts to get sucked back up the vents. 

A few seconds later the door clicks and slides open. Price moves to the side, Soap and Ghost push past him and grip your vest pulling you out the room and into the hallway. The sweet smell of the gas fills his nose, it makes his throat tighten as the fresh air circulates back into the room.

“Is she breathing?” Price asks, he doesn’t get a response straight away. “Soap!”

“She’s breathing - christ - she’s alive.” He replies, his ear pressed up against your face.

“What the fuck happened?” Price asks following Gaz into the main room.

“Makarov left a trap for us. He knew we were getting close.” Gaz says. John watches as Soap takes your vest off. “There'll be more Konni on the way we need to leave.” 

“Shit.” Price curses under his breath pulling the sat-phone off his vest. “Ghost, go get us a car. Gaz get what data you can.” He holds the phone up to his ear listening to it ring out. 

“Price.” Lawell’s voice comes through the phone.

“Laswell. We need exfil, medevac.” 

“Not possible.” 

“Why?”

“Captain, you did this without our approval, we cannot send unit’s into Russia right now.” Shepherd says. Price pulls the phone away from his ear and curses. 

“Makarov is dead.”

“Good. But you still have a job to do, Captain. Secure the weapons in Russia and the nukes in Urzikstan then we can call it even for this little revenge mission you’ve been on.” Shepherd says, Price looks over at Gaz typing on the laptop. 

“Hard to do when you’re one man down.” Price spits. 

“Who is injured? Or is it that smuggler you’ve insisted on dragging around?” Shepherd asks, he sounds mad. Price doesn’t say anything, he hears a sigh down the line.

“Acceptable losses I'm afraid. For the best really, the amount of paperwork she’s generated is unbelievable.” Shepherd says. Price turns to look at you, Johnny is holding you in his arms, all the colour looks like it has drained from your face. Acceptable loss. It makes him mad, so mad he wants to throw the phone across the room. You’re not a loss, because they’re not going to lose you. 

“You have a job to do Captain and I would suggest you do it quickly. If we have to send someone else in to clean up your mess it won’t end well for you.” There’s the warning, the threat. It almost makes Price laugh, he holds it together turning to look at Gaz who nods at him. 

“We’re sending the data from Russia.” Price says keeping his voice level. 

“Good. Now get back to Urzikstan. Preferably without picking up any more strays.” The call ends. 

Acceptable loss. How dare he.

“When’s evac coming?” Soap asks. Price swallows, building his confidence back up. 

“There is no evac. We need to get to Urzikstan ourselves.” Price says.

“What!” Soap shouts gripping you tighter. He can hear the anger in his voice. “Cap, she needs medical attention.” 

“If it’s anything like the gas I inhaled in Verdansk she’ll be fine.” He doesn’t believe the words out his own mouth though. 

“It’s nothing like the gas from Verdansk.” Soap snaps back before looking down at you. 

“Price, vehicle secured.” Ghost’s voice comes through the radio. 

“Okay, let's move.” Price says. 

…

Ghost insisted on driving. Price wanted to drive, he wanted to have something else to focus his mind on other than the sound of your laboured breathing from the back seats. He should be happy, you’re breathing which means you’re alive. As long as you’re alive he’s not going to panic. 

He looks back in the rear view mirror. Soap is still fussing over you, he hasn’t let you go since they dragged you out that room. His fingers brushing your hair and face, his other arm keeping you steady while Ghost barrels down the road. 

He looks over at Gaz, their eyes meet for a second and he looks down to his hand rubbing your thigh. He smiles, swallowing some of the dread away and looking back out to the road. Kyle was the most sceptical about you, said he didn’t want to waste time getting close to you if you were going to betray them.

Johnny tried to convince him it wasn't going to be like that. Even Price had his doubts, all the way up until the kiss, he couldn’t wait any longer not after hearing what Simon and Johnny got up to. There was something in your eyes, something about the way you kissed him back he knew you weren't going to betray them. 

He can almost feel the guilt radiating off of Kyle. He never got to give you a chance, now he might never get to. Price lets out a breath pushing the thought away. They’re not going to lose you, they’re taking you to Farah, they have doctors, you’ll be fine. 

“What are we going to do about Shepherd?” Ghost asks not taking his eyes off the road. 

“We are not going to do anything.” John says he's already got a plan. He’s had a lot of time to think while they’ve been driving back to the border. They can talk about it when this is all over, depending on what state you’re in his plan is subject to change.

“It could have been one of us.” Ghost snaps, John turns to look at Soap and Gaz. 

“I know.” He looks back out the front and scoffs. “Acceptible losses.” 

“I say you put a bullet in his head, Cap.” Gaz says. John smiles and looks up at him through the rearview mirror.

“What the hell?” Ghost says. Price snaps over to look at him as the car rolls to a stop.

“What is it?” He asks. 

“I don’t know, something’s broken.” He says getting out of the car. Price follows him, they walk over and Ghost opens the hood, steam and smoke fills the air. It’s so hot they both have to take a step back. When it dissipates, Ghost reaches down to touch something but pulls his hand back straight away. 

“Fuck. Cooling system must be broken or something. Engine overheated.” Ghost says. 

“Shit.” Price responds looking around. This is not a good place to be stuck. They’re by the border but there’s nothing around for miles, scattered farms and some houses. No cars around for them to take, it’s starting to get dark too. 

“How far can we push this before it breaks totally?” Price asks.

“I don’t know, a kilometre, maybe 2 I wouldn’t want to risk it and be left with no transport whatsoever. If we could leave it for a few hours to cool we might be able to make it over the border.” Ghost says, Price sighs looking around again. 

“Price!” Soap calls. He hears the urgency in his voice, the fear. He walks round the car leaving Ghost. 

“What?” He asks, his eyes scanning over you. You’re shaking, beads of sweat have formed over your body. 

“Feel.” Soap says pulling Price’s hand to touch you. 

“She’s freezing.” He says pressing on your cheek with the back of his hand. 

“What’s wrong with the car?” Gaz asks. 

“Overheating, Ghost thinks the cooling is broken or something.” Price says as the hood of the car is slammed close. 

“There’s a house back down the road at the end of the field. Looks empty, maybe we could see if they have anything to help?” Ghost asks. Price looks over to where he’s pointing.

“That or we can sit for a few hours, let the car cool.” He looks back over at you. “Get her inside somewhere warm, try and get her temperature back up.” He doesn’t like the thought of stopping here, but they’re running out of options. 

Everyone seems to silently agree, Price and Ghost get back in the car. The drive back to the house felt like it was taking hours, not minutes, the drive down the mud offroad was the worst. Ghost had to slow down to stop the car from skidding and Price was worried they could get stuck. 

When they make it to the house it really is starting to get dark. There are no lights turning on, that's a good sign. There are plants in the window that look like their wilting, maybe this place was abandoned when Konni increased their presence in the area. 

“Me and Ghost will clear the place. You two stay here.” Price says as Ghost gets out of the car. There’s looks of concern on Gaz, and Soap’s face, your lips almost look like they're turning blue. They need to be quick, before this gets any worse. 

The house is clear, they know that before they make it to the second floor. Opening the door to furniture covered in sheets, boxes strewn all over the place. Upstairs the building is an empty bar one bedroom with a double bed and a bathroom. 

Gaz and Soap are already carrying you into the house before they get the all clear. They place you down on the sofa running around and finding anything to cover you in. Even with a pile of blankets on you covering everything but your face your lip is still quivering. 

Your lips are definitely blue now but John can see the sweat falling down your face. They don’t have anything to help you, you need a doctor or a medic. Instead they’re stuck in Russia with a broken car. 

“Soap, any idea what that gas was?” John asks. 

“Could have been anything.” He says quickly looking at John then back at you. He presses the back of his hand to your forehead. “They were messing with all kinds of chemicals.” 

John pulls the sat phone off his vest. “I’m calling Nik, maybe he can get us a flight out of here.” 

“I thought he was going to be in Bulgaria.” Gaz says. 

“He better not be.” Price says and walks over to the kitchen. No one follows him and he closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. He gives himself a second to be emotional, that's all he gets one second. 

“Captain!” Nikolai’s voice chimes through the phone.  

“Nik.” He smiles hearing his warm voice. “We’re stuck in Russia, any chance of a pick up.” 

“Ha! Any time Captain. What do you need chopper? Plane?” 

“Whatever you need to get us to Farah as quick as possible.” John replies. There’s silence down the line for a second. 

“When do you need it?” He asks.

“As soon as possible.” John says. “We’ve got one injured.” 

“Yebat. Who?” 

“The smuggler, she inhaled some gas at Makarov's compound. She’s been unconscious ever since.” John explains.

“Yebat. I heard about the kind of things Makarov was working on.”

“Makarov’s dead.” John says.   

“Pozdravleniya, Kapitan!” Nik says, it makes John smile again. “You made the world a little bit better again.” There’s the sound of a door slamming. 

“Send me your location and I’m on my way!” 

“Copy, I'll send them. Thank you, I owe you one.” 

“Ha, no problem kapatin! See you soon.” Nik says before the call ends. John walks back into the living room somehow you look worse and you’re shivering. Johnny is stroking your head wiping the beads of sweat off you. 

“Nik needs the coordinates then he's on his way.” John says. Ghost is already moving out of the  living room. 

“Laptops in the car I got it.” Ghost says as Gaz throws him the keys. 

“What do we do until then?” Johnny asks. “This isn’t good.” 

“Body heat.” Gaz says. “She needs body heat, like if someone has hypothermia you warm them up with your heat so they don’t warm up too fast.” 

“She doesn’t have hypothermia.” Soap says. 

“No but she’s freezing and her lips are turning purple.” Gaz says as Ghost comes back in with the laptop tucked under his arm. 

“It’s worth a try.” Price says, you look like you’re getting worse, not better. “There’s a bed upstairs.” Soap sighs but starts pulling the blankets off you before scooping you back up in his arms. Everyone follows him to the second floor. Gaz pulls the sheets off the bed and Soap lays you down. 

“Take her clothes off, it needs to be skin to skin contact.” Gaz says pulling the bottom of your shirt up. Soap raises an eyebrow but listens, helping him strip you down to your underwear. Then they do the same stripping down to their boxers before climbing into bed. 

Gaz rolls you on your side pressing his chest against your back. “Christ, she’s freezing.” He says reaching down for the duvet and pulling it over you all. 

“You sure this will work?” Soap asks, reaching over to wrap his arms around Gaz pulling them close. 

“We’ll have to wait and see.” Gaz says. Ghost comes back in with the laptop, slumping down on the armchair and opening the laptop. John pinches the bridge of his nose closing his eyes. 

“She’ll be okay.” John says, he’s not sure if he believes it himself but it has to be real. There’s no way after everything that this is the end. 

“And if she’s not?” Ghost asks looking up at Price.

“Then at least we know who to blame.” Price says.

…

Everything hurts. Your chest hurts the most, and your eyes. You’re freezing but there’s someone laid next to you. You move, hands instantly find you, voices filling the air as you open your eyes to look around. 

“Easy, you’re okay.” Johnny says. You open your mouth to speak but it’s dry, you slap your lips together trying to swallow what little moisture there is. It throws you into a coughing fit. You shoot up in the bed, your hand pressed on your chest. 

Hands land on your shoulders and back as you try to suck in gulps of air between the coughs. Someone presses a bottle of water in your hand and you bring it to your lips gulping it down. The coughing stops and you sit there panting. It feels like you can’t get a full breath of air in. 

You can hear yourself wheezing, each breath stings your chest. It feels like you can still smell the sickly sweet odour of the gas. Someone reaches over and takes the bottle out of your hand. You look up to see Price stood by the side of the bed. 

“John.” You say smiling at him. Your voice is hoarse, it doesn’t sound like your own, it sounds weird. Your free hand comes up to rub your neck. He smiles back at you and you look round at Johnny and Gaz supporting you. 

“Where’s your clothes?” You ask, turning to Gaz. Before any of them can respond he leans in and kisses you. His kiss is soft, his hands come up to cup your face. You want to keep kissing him, you want his lips and hands to never let you go. You can’t kiss him for long though, you’re holding your breath and you have to break from him to breathe. 

“Kyle,” he says. You smile at him.

“You gave us a proper scare lass. Thought we’d lost you.” Johnny says pulling you against him and kissing the top of your head. 

“Don't do anything like that again. I don’t think my heart can take it.” Johnny says chuckling. You smile in his chest, yawning and closing your eyes. They made it out, made it out safe and managed to get you out too. They didn’t have to do that but they did. 

You feel Kyle’s hands rubbing your back and John sits down on the bed. You open your eyes looking up at him. He reaches over to stroke your cheek. 

“Thank you.” He says, you smile at him. “But seriously, don’t ever do that again.”

“Only if your life depends on it.” You reply. He tuts, shaking his head. 

“Get some rest.” He says leaning forward to kiss your forehead before standing up off the bed. You look over at the light coming in from the doorway. You see Ghost’s silhouette blocking most of it. 

“Good to have you back.” He says. You nod yawning again, your head still feels stuffy and your limbs feel heavy.

“C’mon, a few hours kip will do you the world of good.” Johnny says encouraging you to lie back. As soon as your head hits the pillows a wave of exhaustion pulls on you. 

“Will you stay?” You ask as you close your eyes.

“Yeah, we’ll stay.” Kyle says as you feel him lay back down next to you.

“We’re not going anywhere.” Johnny says pulling the duvet over you. 

“Good.” You whisper feeling their arms wrap around you, pressing their bodies against yours. You never would have imagined the very people you thought would end your life in a heartbeat would be the people you risk your life for. A few days ago you were all strangers, now you’re lovers? Partners? It doesn’t matter, all you know is you wouldn’t want to change it for the world.

…

You wake in Kyle’s arms, Johnny has gone, as soon as you move he grips you tighter and he hums into your hair. 

“Where are we?” You ask sleepily. 

“Still in Russia, the car broke down, and you got worse.” He explains, you look up at him frowning. “Yeah your temperature dropped, we were worried you were going to get hyperthermia.” 

“I don’t think that's how it works.” You chuckle, turning to face him. His eyes light up as he props himself up and leans in to kiss you. This time you’re determined to let him kiss you for as long as you want.

His hand travels down your body, his thumb dipping past the waist of your underwear. You hear someone come into the room, you can’t be bothered to look though it feels too good having Kyle’s hands running over, your tongue playing with his. 

Someone gets in the bed behind you, you turn slightly to see Johnny pressing himself against your back. He hums into your neck his hand moving up your stomach, Kyle smiles before pulling you back in for another kiss. 

You let Johnny’s hand travel up and under your bra, you gasp breaking from the kiss. Kyle sees Johnny’s hand groping your breast and smiles. 

“You’re eger Tav, she’s only just woke up.” Kyle says. 

“It’s okay.” You say, you don’t want him to stop, his thumbs feel good brushing over your nipples. 

“See, she’s perfect Gaz.” Johnny presses his face into your neck, his lips kissing your skin. Kyle smiles wetting his lips, you smile back as you feel Johnny unclip your bra. You turn raising your arm so you can pull it off. 

Their hands run up your body as you lay on your back, fingers squeeze your nipples, Johnny runs his tongue across your collar bones and up your neck, humming and pressing kisses. You arch your neck back to give him better access as he sucks on the sensitive skin leaving marks. 

You look over at Kyle, his eyes and lips are glossy as he moves his hand down to the front of your underwear. You spread your legs for him and he presses two fingers past your folds circling round your entrance. 

“Always this wet love?” He asks, Johnny chuckles, reaching up to pull your face over to look at him. 

“I think that’s your doing Gaz.” Johnny says, he leans in further to kiss you as Kyle presses a finger into you. You moan breaking from the kiss letting your head tip back trying not to arch your back. 

“Got the softest lips don’t you.” You look up at Johnny leaning over pulling Kyle's face to his. 

“You’re a menace.” Kyle says, his fingers pushing into you faster as they make out. The wet sound of their lips smacking together and Kyle’s fingers fill the dead air. You reach out to grip one of their arms clenching round Kyle’s fingers. 

“Gonna cum love?” Kyle moans in your ear. You nod arching your back, Johnny's mouth locks round one of your nipples flicking it with his tongue. 

“Kyle-” You moan his name as you cum around his fingers, he rides you through it pressing on the spongy spot inside you. Johnny pulls his head off your nipple smiling up at you. You don’t know what to expect from them, your whole body is pulsing with heat. 

“Christ love, the sounds coming out of you.” Johnny coos, his hands haven't left your breasts though. You look over at Kyle, he smiles brushing hair out your eyes. 

“Do you wanna fuck her?” Johnny asks. You both look over at him, he winks. 

“Do you know how to be subtle Johnny?” You ask him. Kyle laughs. 

“I don’t think he knows the meaning of that word.” Kyle scoffs. 

“Like you’re any better.” Johnny replies. You look between them both, flicking your eyes between them. 

“Do you want to?” You ask Kyle. You’re nervous all of a sudden, maybe he’ll say no.

“Are you two done?” Simon’s voice fills the room. You all look over to the doorway. 

“Wanna join us LT?” Johnny asks. Simon doesn’t say anything just crosses his arm. You feel heat rushing to your cheeks. 

“Ach, you’re such a buzzkill.” Johnny says, jumping out the bed and grabbing a shirt. He pulls it over his head going over to him, he throws his arm over his shoulder taking him out into the hall. You see him turn back to you and wink as he closes the door.

“Do you think he’s buying us time?” You ask Kyle, he looks down at you. You reach up to kiss him, his hand moves quicker this time gripping the waist of your underwear. You raise your hips so he can pull them down, he breaks from the kiss pressing his fingers on your clit. 

Pleasure pulses through your body as he shifts next to you taking his own underwear off and climbing on top of you. Your hands run up his back, his hand reaches down to guide his cock into you. He’s soft, gentle like his kisses, his eyes squeeze closed you hear him muttering praises as he eases into you. 

He feels good, so good you have to bite the inside of your cheek so you're not moaning out too loud. 

“Kyle.” You moan arching your back, the change in angle makes his breathing pick up and his thrusts picking up. 

“You feel so good, no wonder Tav wouldn’t shut up about you.” He says, you smile at the praise running your hands up his back. 

“I don’t think he ever shuts up.” You say between your own breathless pants. Your lungs burn but you don’t care, Kyle pushing into you hitting the nice spongy spot inside you with each stroke. Your hands end up round his neck, your fingers running up the back of his head. 

His movements change, his breathing getting more desperate, his hands gripping the pillow, he looks down at you, his nose pressed against yours. His breath is hot on your face, you keep planting kisses on his soft lips as he drives into you faster. 

You start squirming your hips as you get close trying to hold off for as long as possible, it makes you clench around him which only makes his breathing more feral, it feels like he’s pressing into you deeper. 

“Fuck-” You cry out as you cum, so much for trying to keep quiet. A few seconds later he’s cuming too, his thrusts slow, his cock throbbing inside you as you reach up to kiss him. It’s needy and messy, too much teeth and tongue but you don’t care. A few seconds later he flops down beside you. 

“You really are amazing.” He says, you turn in the bed to face him. 

“Not too bad yourself, well compared to Simon, or Johnny.” You tease. He opens his mouth to protest then sees you smiling and stops. 

“Soap’s a bad influence on you.” He says sitting up in the bed you chuckle and his hand comes down to brush your face. “How are you feeling?”

“Good, hungry.” You say, he nods, swinging his legs out the bed and feeling around for clothes. 

“All we have are protein bars, I'm afraid.” He says as you feel round the bed for your bra and underwear. 

“Come down when you’re ready. I’ll save you one.” He says buttoning his trousers up. You nod and get out of bed.

…

It’s cold downstairs. The place is barren, you find them all in the kitchen. John has a laptop, he watches as you walk over to the table and sit next to Johnny. 

“What do you want? Peanut butter or cookies and cream?” Kyle asks, they both sound horrible. You reach over and take one out his hands, he opens the other. 

“So what's the plan?” You ask biting into the bar. 

“We’ll wait another hour or so for the car to be cooled then we’ll go to the border. The plan is to get back to the ULF base outside of Sakhra.” John says. 

“What about the base we attacked?” You ask.

“Russian’s will take care of it, seize everything hopefully before Al-Qatala can get there.” He says. You nod, taking another bite of the bar. 

“What about The Butcher and Khaled?” Kyle asks, oh yeah, you’d forgotten about them. They were supposed to be with Makarov. 

“We don’t know where they are. Laswell and Farah are keeping an eye out but they could be anywhere.” John says. 

“Or they could take this opportunity to take control of Konni.” Johnny says. You don’t like the thought of that. 

“They could, but we have to hope they’re all so busy with the mess they started in Urzikstan they don’t have time for that.” Simon says 

“What about Makarov, does he have a successor?” Kyle asks. 

“Not that we know of, he had a habit of killing off his close allies.” John says. 

“No loose ends.” You say. They all turn to look at you. 

“Makarov is dead. With the intel we have it won’t be long before we know where we’re going next. In the meantime I think we could all use a little time off.” John says. It’s met with agreement and mumbles, Johnny leans back on the chair stretching his back. You keep your eyes on John looking over the laptop at you all. 

His eyes catch yours and he smiles at you. It makes heat rush to your cheeks and butterflies dance in your belly. It feels like you’re beaming, you really are falling for them. 

...

Nikolai arrives an hour later. 

He smiles when he sees you all hugging John and patting him on the back. 

“I thought you had one injured. I bought a medkit.” He says pulling out a red bag. 

“S’alright she’s feeling better now.” Johnny says hitting you on the back throws you into another coughing fit. You have to brace your hands on your thighs. Johnny rubs your back and Kyle comes over with an open bottle of water. You accept it and take a long drink. 

“Trying to kill her, Tav?” Kyle tuts. 

“Not any more.” He winks at you and you shake your head handing the bottle back to Kyle. Johnny jogs up to Simon and helps him throw the bags into the back of the helicopter. 

“Nice to meet you properly.” Nikolai extends his hand, you shake it. Last time you met him you were exhausted and after you’d said hello you passed out in the back of the plane.  

“Heard you speak Russian.” He asks in Russian. 

“Not by choice.” You reply in Russian smiling. 

“Ha! I like this one kapatin!” Nikolai says. Johnny throws his arm around your shoulders. 

“C’mon lass, I’ll tell you about the time Gaz fell out of a chopper.” Johnny says. 

“You fell out a chopper?” You ask shocked spinning to see him. He sighs looking less than impressed with Johnny. 

“Ever been pushed out a chopper, Soap?” He asks. You chuckle as you step up with Johnny as the blades of the helicopter start up. 

You smile at John who gets in after you while Johnny and Kyle continue to wind each other up. 

“Thank you.” You turn to John. He smiles at you and pats you on the shoulder. 

“No problem. We weren't going to leave you.” You nod at him. You wish you knew how you can really say thank you. Especially for all they’re about to help you with. 

You will find a way to make sure they know how thankful you are. You take a seat next to Johnny as Simon gets in last slamming the door behind him. He looks at you and for the first time you think you see him smile under his mask, you smile back patting the seat beside you. 

…

It’s tense when you get back to the ULF base Urzikstan. Farah looks tired, so does Alex, they’ve lost more people than they thought trying their best to stop Al-Qatala and Konni advancing the border.  

Now the Urzikstan military is involved, which takes some of the pressure off her but at the same time now she has to be careful. She’s still a wanted woman. You can’t tell if you respect her more or not, she’s stubborn and she hasn’t given up yet. 

It reminds you of when the ULF came to aid your village when it was attacked by Al-Qatala. You never saw Farah but you remember her soldiers trying to recruit people. That's how they do it, it’s how they have to do it to recruit people. They’ll help you but then they’ll recruit you to die for them instead of Al-Qatala or the military.   

“General Shepherd wants the nukes?” She asks eventually. 

“The Americans want the nukes.” Alex scoffs. 

“I don’t care who wants them, they need to be secured before we can leave.” Price says 

“They haven’t moved them. We can take the base tonight.” She says. 

“How many people do you have?” Price asks. 

“Not including everyone here, I can spare about 10 people.” She says. Price smiles looking over at Ghost then back at her. 

“Tonight then.” Price says. 

…

“What did the doctor say?” Price asks as you wait in a car for the signal to attack the base. There’s no sneaking around this time, other than Ghost and Alex to cut the alarm system. Then it would just be a rush, leave no survivors, secure the missiles and nukes. 

“He said my lungs sound like I’ve been smoking 40 cigarettes a day.” Soap chuckles. “Said I would need to see a proper doctor at a proper hospital.” 

“When we’re back in the UK. We’ll get you sorted.” Price says. “If you still want to come back with us.” You nod smiling at him. Soap nudges you and rests his hand on your thigh. You’re still waiting for the all clear. Farah managed to find more people to help with the raid, she promised Price that the nukes would be handed to the authorities. 

In exchange some ULF prisoners are being freed. You have no idea how the politics side of things work, you’re happy with just shooting where Price points. Maybe you would have made a good soldier, maybe if your captains in Urzikstan were more like Price you would have stayed. 

You see the flair rise into the sky. That's your cue, Price turns the engine on and drives down the road to the main gates. It feels like second nature right now, strangely surreal as you all pile out the car. Bullets fly around, more ULF fighters trickle into the base. 

You catch a glimpse of Ghost in the distance, he sticks out like a sore thumb all in black with the white skull mask. Price barks orders you follow without thinking. Moving with Soap and Gaz like you’ve done this a million times before. By the time you make it to the barn most people are dead and the place starts to get eerily quiet. 

Ghost and Farah meet up with you as you go into the barn. It doesn’t look like anything has changed from the last time you were here with Soap. Everyone walks around looking at the bombs still resting in their holders. 

“Where will you go after this Captain?” You hear Farah ask behind you. 

“Jamal and Khaled are still out there, Makarov is dead and now there’s a power vacuum. Someone has to take his place.” Price says. You look up at Soap standing next to you and he smiles.  

“And what about you?” You hear Farah call. It takes you a second for you to realise she’s talking to you. You turn to look at her, raising an eyebrow. 

“Is there still no way I can convince you to work for us? Fight with the ULF and take our country back.” You almost want to laugh at her, instead you swallow taking a step towards her. 

“There’s nothing left for me here.” You say as a matter of fact. 

“It’s your chance to build a new life for yourself. A better life.” She says, you look past her up at Price who’s standing with his arms crossed. You made your mind up a long time ago, before you had even met them. 

“You can’t build something out of nothing.” You smile. She sighs, nodding. 

“I’m sorry about what happened with your parents. They were good people.” She says. It shocks you, you doubt she would even remember them, she ordered the airstrike that killed one of them. Employed your mother then failed to protect her. You don’t know what to say, you don't want to say anything. 

Her bringing them up makes you mad.  

“Yeah well. It’s always the good people who get hurt. Not the fuck ups like us.” Before she can reply you turn and walk away. You don’t care if you never see her again, you’ve done enough for them. Now it’s time to move on, and get out of this god forsaken country. 

“You good?” You hear Soap ask, his hand lands on the top of your back as you walk. 

“Yeah.” You say looking up at him, you can tell he doesn’t believe you but he doesn't push you any further. 

“Soap!” Ghost calls from ahead of you. “Stop fucking around and get these missiles disarmed.” 

“Yes sir.” Soap says, he walks past you. You hear footsteps behind you but you don’t turn around. Another hand rests on your shoulder. You know it’s John before you see him. 

“You really want to do this? Leave your home.” He asks. You let out a long breath watching Ghost and Soap talk by a crate of something. 

“I get to start my life again.” You say turning to look at him. “Are you telling me you would turn down an opportunity like that?” He shakes his head.

“What are you going to do?” He asks. 

“First I'm going to sleep for at least a day. Then I think I'll try fish and chips.” You say, he chuckles, crossing his arms. 

“What about us?” You ask feeling the nerves rise in you. 

“What about us?” He asks, raising an eyebrow. You sigh, you don’t know what to say. Maybe this is over now, they got what they want, you get passage to the UK. 

“I don’t want it to end.” You admit. 

“Who said anything about it ending. The only thing we need to know is which of us you want to stay with. And I'll let you in on a secret, Gaz has the nicest place.” You look up at him, you’re not sure what to say. You want to hug him, kiss him you can’t right now though, you’re just standing there beaming at him. 

“C’mon, we’ve still got inventory to do before we can leave. Can’t keep Shepherd waiting.” He says walking over to Ghost and Soap. You swallow the tears, they’re happy tears but you don’t want to cry now. 

It’s not ending, nothing is ending. You don’t want to mourn your old life, you want to celebrate your new one. You watch Price turn and wave you over. You smile at him and walk over to them. It wouldn’t be a new life without them.

Banners by plum98

[moody-alcoholic]

Learning To Survive

Part 2 - Let's Fight

Minific. Simon x Johnny. Loosely based on THIS.

CW: Medical inaccuracies, description of injuries, little bit of angst.   WC: 3.1k

Series masterlist - Masterlist - next AO3

Enjoy <3

No one dares to bother him. Kyle tries but he’s not leaving Johnny’s side. 

The next time John comes into the room though he comes in with a folder. Fuck, Shepherd really was serious about them chasing the Makarov lead. 

“There are other SAS task forces.” Simon says squeezing Johnny’s hand. It’s been 3 days, the drain has been taken out of his head but they still want the swelling to improve a little more. If all things go according to plan they’ll be able to try and wake him up after the weekend. 

“He’s moving fast.” John says. 

“According to who?” Simon snaps, he doesn’t mean it, he's not mad a John just the situation. 

“CIA, MI5. The intel's good.” John says handing him the folder. Simon sighs, dropping Johnny’s hand and flicks through the folder. 

“We could get him now, put an end to all this.” 

“The three of us?” He asks, looking at the CCTV stills. It’s definitely him. This feels like a waste though, there’s no way he’s staying in one place for a second longer then he needs to. 

“No, just me and Kyle.” He says, Simon looks up at him and John sighs. He’s going to let him stay, Simon looks back down at Johnny. 

“Thank you.” He says, John sighs again, this time Simon can hear the irritation in it. 

“Don’t. I’m not doing this for you.” John says, there's something in his voice. Anger? He looks up at John, he can’t make his expression out, he’s usually so good at being able to read John. He looks disappointed. 

“Look I get it Simon, I do. You’re in love, I can't have your mind anywhere else, I need you 100% or you’re no use to me.” John says, it’s harsh. John hasn’t spoken like this in years, not since Simon was a sergeant.

“I can focus.” Simon says standing up. “Do you not trust me?” 

“I do. With my life Simon. But this isn’t a pop to the shops this is chasing fuckin’ Makarov.” John rests his hand on Simon's shoulder. 

“I can work.” 

“You are working. You’re watching Johnny. Makarov could still send someone to finish the job, and who’s the best person to protect him now?” John asks. Simon sighs and nods. 

“Who else is going with you? Or is it just you and Garrik?” Simon asks as John squeezes his shoulder before dropping his hand.

“They’re sending some commandos with us. Best they can do at short notice.” John says picking the folder up off the bed. 

“And if he gets away?” Simon asks. 

“Then we keep looking. No matter how long it takes.” John says. Simon nods looking back at Johnny, he looks pale today, Simon’s still not quite used to seeing him with so many tubes and wires coming off him. 

“I won’t let you down.” Simon says looking over at John who’s stood at the end of the bed. 

He smiles. “I know.”

______

“You’re doing great.” The blonde haired nurse says. Johnny huffs and groans as he sits on the edge of the bed. All he needs to do is take a step and turn into the arm chair they bought in the room a couple of hours ago. 

The doctor said it’s important for him to move now, it’s also helping gage how fucked his head is. So far it seems to be only affecting his motor skills. He struggles to walk let alone stand, Simon’s stood behind him watching as the nurses help him lift his arse off the bed. One of his arms is broken in a cast and his ribs are cracked from Simon doing CPR. 

Every movement must be agony.

“Thats it, take a second to catch your breath.” The brown haired nurse says. Johnny doesn’t say anything but Simon can hear the strain on him, in each breath. Simon digs his nails into his palm, it’s taking everything in his power not to just go over and help. 

Johnny has to do this, he lets out another long breath and takes the step. His groaned pain hits Simon right in the chest. He can see how much effort it’s taking him to move one step. The nurses keep encouraging him until he’s turned and slumps down into the chair. 

He groans again and squeezes his eyes closed. Simon's heart hurts watching him in so much pain, the effort it took him just to take one step. Partial paralysis, the bullet hit the part of his brain that controls the motor skills. They think it might improve with time but that's going to take time and more tests. For now all they can do is wait - and run those tests. 

The nurses move all the wires and tubes then take his blood pressure. Simon doesn’t take his eyes off him and Johnny smiles. Even though he’s been awake for less than 24 hours he’s already charmed the medical staff. Simon can never understand how he can so effortlessly make people like him. 

The nurses leave the room and Johnny lays back in the chair, Simon can see him trying to hide the pain on his face. He’s good at it too, he always has been. Simon remembers back in Las Almas, he got shot and managed to get out of enemy territory with a bullet in his arm. He didn’t complain once, not until Simon had to give patch up the wound.

“Hey, Lt, where is everyone?” Johnny asks. It snaps Simon out his head and he stands up from the wall. There's a slight slur in his voice and his smile is crooked. It’s the little things but it hurts Simon all the same. He should have been there quicker, he should have got to Johnny quicker. 

“They’re around. Trying to find Makarov.” Simon says he's not sure how much to tell Johnny, the last thing he needs is Johnny freaking out. 

“F-fu-” Johnny tuts frustrated as the words get stuck in his mouth. So he’s lost more than just his motor skills. 

“Fuck him?” Simon offers raising an eyebrow. 

“Aye.” Johnny smiles. Simon drops his arms and walks around to Johnny sitting down on the bed in front of him. 

“We’ll find him.” Simon says, it’s a promise. They’ll get revenge for everything Johnny has lost and more. 

“I know.” 

“Let you put the bullet in his head when you’re feeling better.” Simon says, another promise. 

“I don’t know. I’m feeling kind of useless right now.” Johnny says, dropping his smile. It stings in Simon's chest. He’s not useless, he's never been useless to Simon even now where he can barely walk he still has that magnificent mind of his, the cheeky grin and the bubbly personality. Makarov didn’t take that away. 

“You’ll get your strength back.” Simon says. He has to get it back because if he cant that would mean discharge. Simon shakes the thought away, he can’t think about that right now. He watches as Johnny flexes his hand then balls it into a fist, his hand shakes and Simon stands up resting his hand on top of Johnny’s fist. 

“What happened in the tunnel?” Johnny asks in a low voice. 

“We don’t have to talk about it now.” Simon says. 

Johnny tuts again. “P-p-pl-ese.” Simon sighs watching how frustrated he gets when that happens. Simon gently lets go of his fist, Johnny opens his hand before closing it around Simon’s thumb.

“The intel was bad. We had no idea Makarov was there, he went for John then for you. You protected him, you know that.” Simon says gesturing at his arm which has been wrapped in a cast. “John was quick to get the call out for backup but we were too far away.” Simon sighs and Johnny squeezes his thumb. It's only light but it’s reassuring.

“When we got there we managed to take out some Konni but Makarov had already fled. Price and Gaz defused the bomb while I tended to you.” He stops, the rest is still somewhat of a blur. He remembers the blood, the medics, the beeping of the machine when he stopped breathing in the helicopter. 

“The doc said I was lucky.” Johnny says. 

“We’re lucky Makarov was a shit shot.” Simon says, it makes Johnny chuckle and he winces in pain pressing a hand on his chest. Simon can’t help feeling bad about it.  

“What happens now?” Johnny asks when he’s finished. 

“Right now you’re on medical leave. When you’re better-” 

“I’m not talking about work.” He interrupts Simon, Simon frowns at him. “What happens with us?” 

Simon lets out a sigh of relief. For the first few hours when Johnny had just woken and was mumbling everything Simon though he had forgotten about their talk, their confession. Simon wants to kiss him, hug him - hold him in his arms and tell him everything will be okay. Not here though, Simon will take him home first, treat him the way he deserves. 

“I love you Johnny. This changes nothing.” Simon says looking directly in his eyes. He sees tears form in them before Johnny blinks them away. Simon smiles and squeezes his fist before moving back to sit down on the bed. 

“Stubbon bastard.” Johnny scoffs, Simon’s heart melts again at the smile on Johnny's face. 

“Not stubborn-” John was right, he's way more than compromised. “-Just in love.” 

___

“Where the f-fu-fu-” Johnny sighs, frustrated. He can’t quite reach the word; it's like it's at the back of his mouth. 

“Fuck?” Kyle says. 

“-Fuck have you been?” Johnny manages eventually as Kyle comes over to the bed.

“Doing your job.” Kyle jokes before wrapping his arms around Johnny as best as he can while Johnny’s in the bed. “It’s good to have you back, Tav.” 

“Good to be back.” Johnny says as he breaks from the hug. His ribs throb, there isn’t a single second he’s not in pain even with the pain killers being pumped through his system he still aches, or something stings. John is next, he comes over to hug him too.

 “Good to see you John.” He says resting his hand on his shoulder and squeezing it. “Thank you, for the tunnel. You’re a good soldier and a good man.” 

“Who dares wins, right?” Johnny says with a cheeky grin on his face.

“I don’t know if I would call this winning mate.” Kyle says with a raised eyebrow looking around the room. 

“Having S-S-Si-S-” He huffs again looking over at Simon. “-Ghost waiting on me 24/7 is a win.” Kyle tuts and chuckles. Johnny feels useless, he can’t even say his lover's name. Is that what they are now? Lovers, they didn’t really get a chance to talk about it. 

“The doctor said you should be doing things by yourself. To get your strength back.” Simon reminds him, Johnny looks over at him and smiles rolling his eyes. He knows Simon secretly enjoys it, even now as he crosses his arms. 

“What did the doctor say?” John asks. Johnny watches Kyle and Price as Simon explains in detail what the doctors have been saying over the last few days. He has 3 cracked ribs and a broken arm. The bullet hit his cerebellum and motor cortex, which means he’s lost almost all his fine motor skills and moving around is hard too. 

Partial paralysis or something they called it. But it’s not a spinal injury that's causing it, it's a brain injury so there’s a good chance with time and therapy he might be able to walk again. Then there’s the mental side of things, he needs assessments for PTSD and depression, common after a near death experience.  

The only shrinks Johnny has seen are the mandatory ones he needed to see for his medical in the army. They were both nice but Johnny couldn’t help thinking about how clinical it felt. Almost like they had a checklist of things to tick off rather than having a serious talk about how he feels. 

“Does that mean I’m done Cap?” Johnny asks as Simon finishes, dread rises in him, he doesn’t want to lose his job. He likes his job, he likes his team. John presses his lips together thinking. 

“Not up to me.” He says. At least that's something it won’t be his friend firing him, it’ll be some stranger on the medical board he’s never seen before. “You don’t need to worry about it right now. Focus on getting back on your feet. Then we’ll deal with the medical board.” Johnny nods and forces a smile, at the end of the day it’s going to be out of all their control. 

“So, Makarov. Found him yet?” Johnny asks to change the subject. Simon moves closer to Johnny’s side, he reaches over picking up Johnny’s hand gently squeezing it. It makes Johnny’s heart warm, Simon might not always know the right things to say but he makes up for it with his actions. 

The little touches and nods, the way he looks at Johnny with his caramel eyes. ‘No one fights alone, Johnny.’ Even now Johnny’s not fighting alone, surrounded by his friends and the man he loves. 

“No, we’re pretty sure he’s left London. Probably the country.” John says, gripping his vest. 

“It’ll take months to find him again.” Kyle adds. Good, that means Johnny has a bit of time to try and improve.

“He’ll slip up.” Simon says. “He’ll get greedy again and that's when we’ll get him.” 

“What was he doing in the tunnel? Why didn’t we know he was there?” Johnny asks. There’s anger in him, if they knew he was going to be there they would have made a different plan and maybe Johnny wouldn’t be here right now. 

“We don’t know. Shepherd is here though he’ll want to talk to you.” John says. Johnny doesn’t want to talk to him, he’s the last person he wants to talk to, he sighs and nods. It’s not like he has a choice. “I also need to know if you want me to call your family?” Johnny sighs again. He doesn’t want to worry them, he doesn’t need them coming down to fuss over him. 

“I’ll talk to them.” Johnny says, John nods. Simon squeezes his hand again. 

“I have a flat in London.” Simon says, Johnny looks up at him and frowns. “If your parents need somewhere to stay.” 

Johnny smiles. “Thanks.” 

“Okay, get some rest Soap. I’ll bring Shepherd by later.” John says. Johnny nods and they say their goodbyes then John and Kyle leave. 

“What about you S-Si- Ghost.” He still can’t do it. Still can’t even say Simon’s name, it fills him with disappointment. 

“I’m staying.” Simon says. “Any chance to give Shepherd a piece of my mind.” 

“I bet he loves that.” Johnny scoffs. 

“Don’t care what he thinks. He owes you one hell of an apology." Simon says. 

“We knew the risks.” Johnny shrugs. “We’re soldiers at the end of the day.” 

“We didn’t know the risks though. That's on him.” Simon says with venom in his voice. Johnny squeezes his hand.

“I’m still here.” Johnny says, Simon turns to look down at him. Christ, Johnny can’t even see his face but he wants to kiss him. He’s practically fucking him with his eyes when theres a knock on the door. Simon lets go of his hand walking over to the door. 

It’s not a nurse or a doctor, they wouldn't have knocked. Simon opens it and a lump forms in Johnny’s throat as Shepherd steps into the room. 

“I heard you were awake.” He says stopping at the end of the bed. Johnny doesn’t say anything. He’s not sure what he was going to feel when he saw Shepherd but all he can feel right now is anger. Simon stands behind him with his arms crossed. 

“We’re very sorry for what happened. Our intel told us Makarov was in Russia, we had no idea he was going to be in that tunnel.” He says he's nervous. Johnny has never seen him nervous before. “I heard you were going to be okay.”

“Okay’s a bit of a stretch.” Johnny says. 

“Well obviously you’ll be commended for your actions in the tunnel.” Shepherd says, Simon scoffs. 

“I almost die and I get a medal?” Johnny asks raising an eyebrow. 

Shepherd nods. “For your heroism and bravery. You saved Captain Price’s life. The bomb was defused and you all saved countless lives.” 

“Did you come here just to apologise or is there something else General?” Johnny asks, he’s tired now he just wants to be alone. Shepherd nods and reaches over offering Johnny a folder. 

“You’ll be discharged with the highest honour.” Shepherd says as Johnny reads over a paper he thought he would be seeing in his 60’s not his 20’s. He feels sick, there’s a notarised letter from Shepherd too.

“What about the medical board?” Johnny asks. Simon comes over and takes the folder out of Johnny’s hands. “And isn’t Price supposed to be doing this?” 

“Captain Price would like to go to the medical board but based on your injuries I thought you would like the other option.” Shepherd says. 

“B-bul-bul-” Johnny huffs, angrily.

“Bullshit.” Simon says for him. 

“Just think it over. A straight discharge is easier than waiting months and months to plead your case to the medical board.” Shepherd says. 

“What the hell is going on?” John’s voice fills the room as the door opens. Everyone looks as John and Kyle walk in. Simon goes straight over to John and hands him the folder. John frowns, Shepherd takes a step over to the door. Kyle moves in the way blocking it. 

“What the fuck is this?” John asks. Johnny sighs, maybe Shepherd is right. Being honourably discharged is quicker and easier than fighting the medical board. His injuries are severe, he tries to wiggle his toes but he can't.

There’s no chance he would pass the medical board. He can’t even say the name of the man he loves. The man who’s currently sizing up Shepherd like he’s about to fight him. John’s shouting profanities as he waves the papers. 

They’re fighting for him, they’re going to fight the board with him. He gets a sudden rush of pride - hope follows. There is always hope, even now he’s laying here bruised and broken there is always hope. He watches as Kyle joins in defending Johnny’s actions. 

“It’s not up to any of you.” Simon says suddenly. It snaps Johnny out his head and everyone turns to look at Simon. “It’s up to Johnny.” 

Eyes all land on Johnny. This is his chance, he could give up now and take the discharge with the perks, make life easier for everyone. Or fight. Fight to get his strength back, fight for the person he loves, for the friends who just defended him. If they believe in him then he can believe in himself. 

He tries to wiggle his toes but again nothing happens. 

“F-fu-fu-” He takes a breath concentrating. “-Fu-fuck it. Let's fight.” 

Banners by firefly-graphics

[moody-alcoholic]

This but you know Simon and John have the big sports direct mugs.

And you know Kyle and Johnny don't get it...

[moody-alcoholic]

Learning To Survive

Part 1 - The Tunnel

Minific. Simon x Johnny. Injury recovery, PTSD, new relationship. Loosely based on THIS.

CW: Medical inaccuracies, CPR, description of CPR, canon typical violence, bedside vigil, angst, blood, brain surgery.   WC: 3.8k

Series masterlist - Masterlist - next AO3

Enjoy <3

The tunnel was strangely humid. 

Simon didn’t expect that, they’ve only been walking for a few minutes and he can already feel an uncomfortable layer of sweat under his clothes. 

“I heard you spoke to Tav.” Gaz says suddenly. Simon’s breath catches in his throat then he scoffs. Of course Johnny talked to Kyle, they’re best friends. 

“It’s okay, you don’t have to say anything.” Kyle sighs, Simon looks down at him. He looks confident, his confidence has grown so much over the past year. John always had a good eye for people but even Simon was sceptical when John set up 141. It all turned out alright in the end though, he quickly looks behind him to make sure the soldiers are following. 

“It’s just, I’m so glad he’s over the whole ‘should I shouldn’t I’ phase.” Gaz nudges him. “Good for you both, I’m happy for you.” 

“Focus on the task, Sergeant.” Simon says, but they both look at each other and smile.

“Always, sir.” Gaz responds. Simon wishes Johnny was here, he wishes it was him instead of Kyle walking beside him. It’s selfish to think like that, John needs him for the bombs they’re looking for. He’s useful over there, the only thing Simon is supposed to run into are hostiles. 

It’s eerily quiet though, almost too quiet.  

They stop at the tracks, this side of the tracks has already been shut down so it’s safe to follow them, they both look up and down anyway. 

“It’s quiet.” Gaz says, Simon tuts. 

“Oh come on.” Gaz scoffs. “Don’t tell me Ghost believes in that.” No , Ghost doesn’t but Simon definitely does. Christ , Johnny really is rubbing off on him. He never would have thought twice about something like that but now he has someone else to worry about he’ll take all the luck he can get. 

Simon picks a direction and they start walking. It is quiet though, they haven't taken any contact and based on how quiet the coms are neither have the others. Simon gives himself a second to breathe and get his head together. Johnny knows what he’s doing, he’s a good trained soldier. He’s in no more danger than he was 12 hours ago. The only thing that's changed is now they both know they love each other. 

It’s stupid really, this mission should be textbook. There’s no surprises around the corner, just a bomb or two find and defuse and maybe a few Konni to take out along the way. Although they haven’t run into anyone yet. Easier job for them at least, he hopes John’s having the same luck on his end. 

They keep walking for a little longer, they do come across some Konni and John relays they’ve bumped into some too. Maybe they were just deeper down the tunnel which means the bombs are probably deep too. Then the call comes through - they found the bomb. 

Suddenly that seems to change the mood, like a switch is flipped. They run into more Konni and Simon gives the order to start heading back towards John and Johnny. If they’ve found the bomb they might need back up, chances are Konni would be heading towards them. 

The order for backup comes in only seconds later, it’s only just left Price’s lips when Simon was giving the order to move. He locked eyes with Gaz for a second, he will never forget, the look in his sergeant's - in his friend's eyes. 

It was a look he’d only seen on Gaz’s face a few times, a twisted mix of horror and worry. Simon’s never felt this before, his heart feels like it’s about to burst out his chest as he breaks into a sprint. He has to get to them, he has to get to Price because there is one other person there. 

The man he finally confessed his love to no less than 12 hours ago. The person he finaly let his guard down with there’s only one thought in his head. Only one action that matters; save Johnny. 

Simon’s feet pound on the ground, he’s running as fast as he can. He wished he could rip his vest off and ditch his weapons just to run quicker. He can’t breathe it doesn’t matter he can hear shots, he can hear another voice it’s not John or Johnny. 

“NO!” there’s an ear piercing scream, John - it’s John screaming. It feels like Simon’s heart stops as he makes it through the door. He feels sick as he sees Makarov, he’s not supposed to be here. All the intel they had told them he was in Russia, now he’s here running from them. Simon throws himself against cover, firing shots off at Konni and Makarov.

Simon can’t see him anymore though, it’s too late he’s missed him. He looks over at John getting to his feet and rushing over to the bomb. 

Where’s Johnny?  

Then he sees him, then he sees the blood.  

“No, no, no.” He whispers, not quite believing his eyes. He drops the weapon out his hand without even checking if the place is clear. He knows John is shouting instructions at Kyle but Simon’s not listening. A ringing starts in his ears. 

He looks like he’s sleeping. Simon collapses down by his head resting his hand on his chest. He can see the wound on the side of his head. He doesn't think, he just works, his hands shake as he undoes Johnny’s vest. He throws the mags and his weapon to the side exposing his chest. He pulls off a glove placing his fingers on Johnny’s neck. 

No pulse.  

He’s trained for this, he knows what to do - he never thought he would actually be doing it though. Least of all on Johnny. 

“You’re gonna be alright Johnny.” He says as he presses his hands together and starts pumping on Johnny’s chest. There’s no blood anywhere else which is good, the wound on his head even looks like it’s stopped bleeding. 

He feels the tears come, he tries so hard to fight them. He’s never broken down in public and he’s not going to start now, but his body betrays him as his adrenaline wains and fear grips him. 

This can’t be real. 

He’s not going to give up. He’s not going to stop, not now, not ever. He will save the person he loves. He lets the fear be replaced with anger “You’re not fuckin’ dying today Johnny. You hear me!” He shouts between breaths. 

“Simon.” That's John’s voice next to him. His breathing changes as he feels the tears pool up on his mask. He doesn’t stop though. He still feels warm through Simon’s hands, he looks over at John. 

“Where’s MEDEVC?!” Simon shouts. His hands start to shake but he keeps his rhythm, that's all that matters. Johnny is not dying today.

“Watcher, we need a medic.” John asks, if somewhat reluctantly. 

“Captain.” Kyle protests. It makes Simon angry. 

“We try Garrik!” Simon snaps. He’s not going to give up. Kyle comes over and bends down on the other side of Johnny. 

“Stop.” Kyle says, taking his gloves off. 

“No.” Simon says. 

“We need to check for a pulse.” Kyle explains, Simon sighs and reluctantly stops watching Kyle press two fingers against Johnny’s neck. He looks like he’s just sleeping.

This can’t be real. 

“Keep going.” Kyle says, sitting back on his knees. Now Simon can hear the determination in his voice. He keeps going, he feels his body heat up but it’s not going to stop him, he’s not dying today. Simon looks up as he hears people rush in, including a medic with a massive bag and a machine in his hands. 

Kyle stands up, and he explains what happened to the medic who puts his bags down by Johnny’s head. The medic looks grim as his eyes scan over them both, a second later he nods and orders someone to take over from Simon. 

He kneels down opposite Simon getting his hands ready to take over. Simon doesn’t want to though, he doesn’t want to let Johnny go. He feels John’s hand land on the top of his back. 

“Lieutenant, let them take over.” Price orders. It makes a shiver run through Simon’s body. It’s an order he’s going to ignore. He doesn’t say anything, the soldier in front looks past him at John as the medic starts to open his bag and turns on the machine that beeps. 

John bends down next to him pressing his mouth close to his ear. “Simon, if you want to save him you have to let them work.” Simon stops and sits back on his knees as the soldier takes over CPR. Simon stands up and John keeps his hand on the top of Simon’s back. It’s the little support he needs to keep him from breaking down totally. 

This can’t be real. 

That's all he can think as he watches the other medic cut off his top and starts sticking wires on his chest. Simon holds his breath every time they stop CPR as they work around each other. More people are coming in now and Simon is forced to stand back. The more distance he puts between him and Johnny the more it hurts.

One of the medics puts a mask with a bag attached over his nose and mouth and starts pumping it. Another one attaches a neck brace and starts to look at the wound on his head. Simon’s eyes look over at the monitor, it’s giving off a steady rhythm. That has to be good right?  

“Pulse check.” The lead medic says as CPR stops again. Simon has no idea what to look at. 

Simon’s holding his breath, his head is pounding as rapidly as his heart. 

“We have a pulse.” 

Simon almost passes out right there. His eyes fix on the monitor showing a steady rhythm, he can see his chest rise and fall slightly. He zones out the medic barking orders. He feels John squeeze his shoulder. He can’t move though, his eyes fill with tears as he watches them work around Johnny doing who knows what. 

They’re keeping him alive, that's what they’re doing. 

Suddenly John is in front of him. It snaps him back to reality. Simon can see the seriousness on his face. 

“I need you with me Simon.” John says, wrapping his hand around the back of Simon’s neck. “Are you with me lieutenant?” 

Simon nods. 

“Good. He’s going to make it Simon.” John says squeezing his neck and keeping eye contact. “I need you to focus now okay?” 

Simon nods again. 

“Good. We’ve got one hell of a mess here so I need you to go with Soap.” John says and Simon tries to look past him but John squeezes his neck again pulling his attention back. “Simon, listen to me. Your orders are to stay with John. I need someone to keep an eye on him and you’re my best.” 

Simon nods. 

“Words, C’mon Simon I need to know you’re solid.” John says. 

“I’m solid. Stay with Soap.” Is all Simon can manage without his voice breaking. John nods, dropping his hand and Simon can see that they’ve started to move Johnny onto a stretcher. Simon walks closer wanting to help but not knowing what to do.

“Gaz, go with him.” John says.

“Captain.” Kyle protests.

“That's an order, Garrik!” John snaps. 

“Let’s move, there’s a bird waiting for us.” The lead medic says. Kyle comes up next to Simon. 

“He’s gonna make it. It’ll take more than a bullet to stop Soap.” Kyle says, Simon knows he’s trying to be reassuring but it’s not helping right now. He looks at the pool of blood on the floor. That’s a lot more blood than Simon thought there was. He swallows and nods before following the medics moving back into the service tunnel. 

This still doesn’t feel real.

___

Simon’s pacing. 

He can’t keep still, not while they’re waiting to find out how fucked up Johnny is. He stopped breathing again on the short ride to the hospital. This time though they were quick to tend to him while Simon’s nails dug into his palm. He still only has one glove, he left the other in the tunnel. 

“He’ll be alright.” Kyle says, although Simon thinks that's more for himself then him. Simon hums anyway. They’ve been waiting for what feels like hours, Simon looks down at his watch, it’s only been 15 minutes since they took him into the CT scanner. 

“Makarov wasn’t supposed to be there.” Simon says, there’s real venom in his voice. If they knew he was there they would have gone with a different plan, they wouldn’t have split up. They would have been more cautious, maybe taken a different route. Maybe then Johnny wouldn’t have been shot. 

“Right? I thought he was in Russia.” Kyle says, Simon looks at him. He’s not sure what Kyle’s thinking. He's been quiet up until now. Johnny is his best friend, he loves him too. 

“Intel was bad.” Simon says, crossing his arms. Now Johnny’s fighting for his life because of bad intel. Simon needs someone to blame, someone is going to pay for this and it’s not just going to be Makarov. A nurse walks around the corner and spots them walking over. 

“Garrik.” Simon says, dropping his arms, Kyle stands up. 

“Mr Riley?” She asks, Simon nods. 

“They’re taking him through to surgery. There is some bleeding on his brain but so far his scans are looking promising. The consultant is on his way and he will be able to give you a more detailed update.” She explains. 

Simon feels like he’s about to pass out for the second time tonight. He almost reaches out to hold on to Kyle for support. Instead he hears Kyle scoff and slap him on the shoulder before laughing and wrapping his arms around Simon. He doesn’t try to stop it, smiling under his mask. 

“Would you like to wait in the family lounge?” She asks. 

“We’re okay, thank you.” Simon says, it’s quiet here that's why he picked the spot in the first place. She nods understandingly and turns to walk away. Kyles hand is still on Simon shoulder. 

“See, told you. It’s going to take more than a bullet to stop John MacTavish.” Gaz says with another scoff before sitting back down. Simon hums again. He’s not out of the woods quite yet, he’s being prepped for brain surgery, a million things could still go wrong. 

He’s alive though. He’s alive and that's all that matters right now. 

…

The hospital coffee tasted like shit. 

Kyle was passed out between two of the chairs. John came back about an hour after Johnny had been taken into surgery. One of the nurses came to tell them she would bring them updates and that the surgery was going to take around 4 to 5 hours. 

“Makarov shouldn’t have been in that tunnel.” Simon says in a low voice to John this time. He looks over to see if Kyle moves but he doesn’t. 

“I know.” John replies, taking a sip of his coffee. “You should have heard the earful I gave Kate.” 

“How did we miss this?” He almost hisses. 

“I don’t know, but we do know who gave us the intel.” John sighs. Simon sips on the disgusting coffee if just to give his hand something to do. 

“And what has he said?” Simon asks.

“Nothing yet. Laswell’s keeping me posted.” John says, Simon scoffs, shaking his head and sipping on the coffee again. There’s silence between them for a few more moments. Simon looks back down at his watch. It’s been 45 minutes since the nurse came out to give them an update, she should be out again with in the next 15 minutes. 

“I heard you and John talked.” Price says, Simon’s head snaps to him, he looks almost disinterested. 

“Yeah, how-” Kyle, of course it was Kyle. Simon looks over at him still sleeping

“I wouldn't be much of a captain if I didn't know what my team was getting up to.” John sighs. 

“Including personal relationships?" Simon hits back.

“Especally personal relationships.” John smiles, turning to Simon. Simon holds his gaze, he expected him to get mad. Tell him that they had to break up even though they’re not really like that. In all fairness Simon’s not quite sure what they are, they haven’t exactly had time to talk. 

“And?” Simon asks, swallowing the nerves. 

“As your captain I would tell you that I'm concerned, dating a subordinate is inappropriate and that I’m worried it may compromise your ability to do your job.” He says, it’s harsh but true.

“It won’t.” Simon replies. 

“It already has.” John says looking away and sipping on his coffee. “I saw you in that tunnel Simon. You went thinking like a lieutenant or even a soldier. You were thinking like someone in love.” 

Simon’s not sure what to say. He wants to snap at Price and defend himself, tell him he would do that for any of them. Instead he holds his tongue sipping his coffee to quell the nerves. 

“But.” John says resting his hand on Simon’s thigh. “As your friend, I’m happy for you. I see how happy you both are. He’s good for you Simon.” 

Simon sighs. “And who would my friend tell me to listen to, my captain or my friend?” John scoffs. 

“Listen to your head. Follow your heart.” John says. Simon tuts. 

“Thats real fuckin’ cheesy.” Simon scoffs. 

“Comes with age.” John chuckles, smiling at him. 

…

This time it’s the surgeon who comes out instead of the nurse. At first it makes Simon’s stomach drop, he fears the worst but instead he smiles as he snakes their hands as he introduces himself. 

“Your friend is very lucky. It’s not everyday I get to pull bullets out of people’s brains and they live to tell the tale.” 

“So he’ll live?” Kyle blurts out. 

“Yes, but we won’t know the extent of any long term damage until he wakes up.” The doctor says. “Right now there is some swelling and fluid build up so we’ve put a tube in to drain it, after that we can try and wake him up.” 

“So he’s in a coma?” Kyle asks. 

“Yes, for now while the swelling reduces and we can run some more tests we’re going to keep him in the ICU.”

“Can we see him?” Simon asks. 

“They’re going to be taking him into room 3.” The doctor says gesturing for them to follow him. “Visiting hours are over but you can see him quickly. Does he have any family?” 

“I can give you the details.” John says. When they walk into the room it’s empty but there are chairs against the wall. Kyle sits down and John goes with the doctor. Simon can’t keep still though, not until he sees Johnny. 

They’re not waiting long before Simon sees a nurse and then the bed. They roll it in and Simon’s sure his heart stops for a second. His head has been shaved, he’ll hate that. There’s a tube coming off the top of his head just like the doctor said there would be, the rest of his head is covered with a bandage. He’s unconscious with a tube down his throat, and he’s been changed into a hospital gown. 

“We have his belongings if you would like them.” One of the nurses says. Simon’s not listening though walking around the bed to sit on the other side of him. 

“I’ll take it.” Kyle says as the nurses move all the tubes and wires connecting them to the wall instead. Simon doesn’t take his eyes off Johnny, the side of his face looks swollen, his eye is puffy and red. 

Simon sits down next to the bed reaching out for Johnny’s hand. Even with all the tubes and wires he looks good. He looks peaceful, Simon leans forward and rests his chin on the bed guard. He squeezes Johnny’s hand, rubbing the back with his thumb. 

“I’m here Johnny.” He says quietly, he knows Kyle is here. John will probably be back soon but he doesn’t care. “You’re going to be okay. It’s all going to be okay.” 

He’s going to be okay. Simon tells himself. He’s going to be okay. 

___

The next day Shepherd showed up. 

Simon was surprised, no one expected him to fly out the UK. They definitely didn’t expect him to show up at the hospital. It felt like he was invading, like he was stepping into something private. It made Simon uneasy as he saw Price following him into the room. 

“Don’t get up on my account.” Shepherd says as he walks over.

“Wasn’t planning on it.” Simon retorts looking back down at Johnny. Shepherd doesn’t get any of Simon’s attention. He doesn’t deserve it, he loses all of their respect for putting Johnny in this hospital bed. He should have known where Makarov was, he got them the intel. It was his job to make sure they weren’t running into a trap. 

“Is he going to be okay?” Shepherd asks. 

“The doctors think so.” Price says. “It’s just a waiting game.” 

“Thats good.” Shepherd sighs. Simon scoffs, all he cares about is the fact that now he has to do less paperwork. Kyle’s not here, it's his turn to rest. Now that no one knew where Makarov was it was risky leaving Johnny on his own. There had been rumors the bomb defusal had scattered Konni, it wouldn’t be a surprise if there was a bounty on Johnny’s head. 

There wasn’t much new intel and what they did have - especially from the Americans - they didn’t know if they could trust it. Simon already wasn’t planning on leaving Johnny’s side but until they know where Makarov is and what is happening to Konni he gets to stay here. 

“Any news on Makarov?” Simon asks. 

“Not yet, but I have people looking. We’ll find him.” Shepherd says. Simon hums but holds his tongue. He wants nothing more than to rip into him but he promised John he’d be civil. 

“Well anyway captain. We should talk, I have a job for you all.” Shepherd says, turning to John. Something snaps in Simon when he hears that, he’s not sure why but the thought of not only leaving Johnny but working while he’s in a coma. It makes his stomach twist, how dare he order them around after he almost got one of them killed. 

“We’re a little bit busy, General.” Simon says. He so badly wants to reach out and touch Johnny, hold his hand and ground himself. John clears his throat, it’s a warning - don’t push it. 

“I cannot have an asset sitting around watching someone who isn’t going to die. Not when we think Makarov might still be in London.” Shepherd says. Simon scoffs. 

“Lets talk outside, General.” John says, Simon can hear the edge to his voice and he looks over to see John shooting eyes at him. He doesn’t care, he said what he said. As soon as the door is closed Simon reaches out and grabs Johnny's hand again. 

He feels the tears come, he can’t tell if it's out of anger or sadness he doesn’t care. No one is going to make him leave Johnny’s side. Not Shepherd, not anyone. 

“I’ll always be here for you Johnny.” He says as he brings his hand up to his mouth and kisses it. “Always and forever.”

next

Banners by firefly-graphics

[moody-alcoholic]

Learning To Survive Masterlist

The call for backup came and Simon gave the order to move. He locked eyes with Gaz for a second, he will never forget, the look in his sergeant's - in his friend's eyes. 

It was a look he’d only seen on Gaz’s face a few times, a twisted mix of horror and worry. Simon’s never felt this before, his heart feels like it’s about to burst out his chest as he breaks into a sprint. He has to get to them, he has to get to Price because there is one other person there. 

The man he finally confessed his love to but a few hours ago. The person he finally let his guard down with there’s only one thought in his head. Only one action that matters; save Johnny. 

…

Minific. Simon x Johnny. Injury recovery, PTSD, new relationship. Loosely based on THIS. It was supposed to be a quick one shot now here we are 6 pages of draft later.

AO3

Part 1 - The Tunnel Part 2 - Lets Fight Part 3 - Home Sweet Home

Banners by firefly-graphics

Spotify playlist

[moody-alcoholic]

Broken and bruised

I needed to kick the angst so I wrote this. It was supposed to be pure angst but I couldn't help throwing in a sprinkle of smut too.

Summary: Johnny x Simon. Johnny's at home trying to recover from surriving Makarov's gunshot, only he finds himself wallowing in self-pity instead. WC: 3k

CW: +18 content MDNI. Smut, oral (M receiving), angst, hurt/comfort, injured Johnny, mentions of scars, suicidal thoughts, self-pitty, description of injuries, language.

this ended up being a whole minific...

Masterlist

Enjoy <3

___

Some days are good. Some days are bad. Then there are days like this - utter shite. 

His head hurts, his leg hurts. His whole fucking body hurts and the pain killers aren't touching it. Simon tried to stay, he can always tell when Johnny’s lying to him, he’s like a bloodhound only with emotions. Which is always so fucking annoying because Ghost is so good at being stoic. 

It doesn't matter anyway for as good as Simon is at reading him, Johnny is an expert at faking it. 

‘Does that hurt?’ Simon asked as he transfers Johnny from the bed to his wheelchair. Johnny winces, wrapping his arms tight around Simon’s neck and shoulders. 

‘Na, jus’ stiff s’all.’ Johnny says gritting his teeth and biting down on the inside of his cheek. Simon pretended to ignore it, brushing it off as he made them breakfast. He places it down in front of Johnny with two little white pills. Morphine. 

Johnny sighs but takes them just to appease Simon. Then when Simon reluctantly had to leave Johnny put on a smile and told him Price and Gaz needed him. 

‘You could always come? Your security clearance is still active. I think they’d like to see you.’ Simon said, Johnny just sighed and let Simon transfer him out of his chair and onto the sofa.

That's where he’s been for the last two hours trying to ignore the throbbing pain in his head. 

Maybe something was wrong, maybe he’s having a stroke and he’s about to keel over right here. Simon would come home to his body, he’d try and save him, just like he did in that god forsaken tunnel. Traumatic brain injury leading to partial paralysis. On a good day Johnny can move, maybe even walk a couple steps - but today is a bad day. A utterly horrible miserable day. 

‘You could always come?’ Simon’s words spin in his head. And do what? Sit there and listen to them talk about how they’re going to find Makarov? How they’re going to find him and take him down while Johnny sits there useless, watching, listening, dreaming he could join them and get revenge. 

‘I should have let you kill him when we had the chance.’ Yeah Price, you fuckin’ should have. He scoffs, he’ll never be back with them again, he’ll never put the uniform on again, no matter how many doctors tell him his paralysis might improve with physical therapy. Another thing he hates. 

At least the Crown pays for him to go private, the facility is nice and the therapists are all patient and kind. Even when Ghost is towering above them with his arms crossed watching how little Johnny’s improved. 

He can’t sit here anymore, he can’t wallow in his self-pity. He reaches over and turns his wheelchair so can transfer into it. He’s going to take a piss at least. Simon put the number for their neighbor in his phone, she's a retired nurse and was always happy to help. 

Johnny’s almost convinced Simon picked this flat on purpose, retired nurse next door, body builder across the hall. They’ve helped a few times before when Johnny’s fallen in awkward places and Simon can’t quite get him up by himself. 

Because he’s that fucking useless, can’t even take a piss without having to go through a million steps. He secures the wheelchair and with one hand on the armrest he pushes his body up to transfer. Something is wrong though, before he can figure out what it is the chair rolls away while Johnny’s still in the air. 

His arse slams on the floor painfully, it sends a pain skyrocketing up his spine. It makes his ears ring and he cries out in frustration as he hits the floor with his fist. That hurts more, making his weakened arm shake. He looks over to see he forgot to put the brakes on his chair. He looks down at his useless legs screaming as he tries everything in his power to get them to move. 

They don’t even twitch. He slams his hand on one of his thighs, the pain ripples down to his toes. So he can still feel he just can’t fuickin’ move anything. Fuck this. He tries to pull himself back up onto the sofa but he doesn’t have the strength in his body anymore. Months in hospital ate his muscles away, now all that's left is bone and skin.

He stops trying letting out a frustrated huff, he looks over at the wheelchair. It feels like it’s mocking him, he scoffs looking at it. He doesn’t need a stupid chair, besides he’s on the floor now anyway. Unless the movement decides to magically come back into his legs he’s stuck here until Simon gets home. 

Fuck it. He turns onto his stomach and uses his arms to pull himself out the living room towards the bathroom. He’s going to take a piss no matter what his body says. It takes all his energy and by the time he gets there he doesn’t even need to go anymore. His head is throbbing worse then ever, he pushes the bathroom door open. 

He should take a bath, that always helps him relax. Only he can’t get in the bath without Simon’s help. He huffs frustrated and drags himself over to the shower instead, turning over onto his back and sitting up against the glass of the shower. 

Simon had a seat and handles drilled into the shower so Johnny can sit and Simon can help him bathe. Showering is the most intimate they’ve been with each other in months and even then it’s not a sexual thing. Johnny hates his body, he hates how his toned muscles have been wasted away. Simon tried to take him to the gym but his strength is just not there.

It was horrible, embarrassing, Simon tried his best making a routine based on the advice his physical therapists gave. They tried to work on his arms and torso if his legs were feeling up for it they would work on them too. Johnny sighs, pulling his shirt off over his head and looking down at his flat stomach. 

There are scars dotted all over, bullets and shrapnell, hair has grown over some of them, for the others it looks like the hair won’t even touch them. Johnny never understood how Simon could stay by his side, stay so loyal to him. Love is a powerful thing. He shimmies his sweatpants and underwear off, he sighs thinking about Simon. 

He does love him, he’ll always love him, he just wishes he wasn’t a useless broken mess. He always thought things would be so much different. They would still be working, Johnny could walk and think straight. He would cook for Simon, he would draw, his fine motor skills wouldn’t be shot. He would fuck Simon the way he deserves it on every surface in view. Instead Makarov put a bullet in his head.

Simon doesn’t deserve him, no one does - if he was a horse they’d put him down. Maybe they should, they should move on and forget about him. But there’s that stupid emotion he can’t get away from - love. For as much as he hates himself he’s still madly in love with Simon Riley. Simon deserves better, he tells himself as he pulls his useless body into the shower. 

He deserves a man who can stand on his own two feet. He deserves a man who can make love to him and take care of him. He needs someone watching his six and who can be there for him every second of the day. Johnny groans reaching up to turn the shower on, he shivers as the initial blast of cold water hits him. He turns the water up hot letting it burn his back, he looks down at his legs and feet. He tries to wiggle his toes but there's nothing. He chuckles, of course fuckin’ tyipical. Maybe the hot water will help loosen up what little muscle he has left.

He hears his phone ringing in the living room. It’ll be Simon checking up on him - another thing he wouldn’t have to worry about if Johnny was normal. He doesn’t even get revenge, Price or Ghost will put a bullet in Makarov while Johnny stays at home praying they all make it back safe. The water stings as his back heats up to the point of pain. 

Good, he could use pain somewhere other than his head and arms right now. The phone stops ringing but starts again immediately. Now Simon will be panicking, he’ll already be getting ready to call Mandy from next door to come and check on him. Or maybe he’ll leave whatever brief he’s in and come and check on him himself. 

Johnny doesn’t care anymore, he should have bought his phone. Fuck. No. Simon shouldn’t have to be doing this, how can he be a good asset to 141 if he can’t think straight. How the hell is he supposed to be John’s lieutenant if he can’t concentrate. His mind will always be somewhat focused on Johnny. At least when they were in the field they could have each other's backs, now it’s just Simon worrying if Johnny has fallen and can’t get up, or hurt himself. 

Johnny feels the tears come. Useless, he’s nothing but useless. He can’t even get up off the stupid floor, he can’t remember to bring his phone with him. He can’t even do things he likes, his fine motor skills are non existant and he can barely hold a pencil for a few minutes before his hand cramps up and he has to stop. 

This time when the phone stops it doesn’t ring again. He hopes Simon’s not coming, he needs to focus on work not Johnny's self loathing. He closes his eyes and leans his head back in the shower and lets his hot water pummel his face, it’s nice, somewhat calming even the throbbing in his head disperses. He lets out a sigh and clears his mind letting himself have a moment of peace. 

… 

The shower turning off snaps him back to reality. 

He has no idea what happened, the last thing he remembers was dragging himself into the shower. He looks up at a worried looking Simon bending down in front of him. Johnny lets out a disappointed sigh, he didn’t want Simon to come, now he’s left work for no reason. 

“You okay?” Simon asks, reaching over to pick up a towel and wraps it around Johnny who leans forward to let him. He tries to wiggle his toes again but nothing happens. 

“Johnny?” Simon asks this time with more concern in his voice. Johnny nods and sniffles, his eyes are raw and his nose is stuffy, at least he had a good cry. Simon doesn’t say anything and Johnny doesn’t protest, he just helps Johnny dry then scoops him up in his arms taking him to the bedroom. Johnny sits on the edge of the bed holding the towel around him as Simon looks around for fresh clothes. 

Johnny looks over at the clock on the bedside table, it’s just past midday so he’s been in the shower for at least an hour. It feels like it, his body feels warmed to his bones and his skin is wrinkled. Simon comes back over with a pair of boxers and kneels down in front of Johnny before picking up one foot. 

Johnny tries to move his leg again but nothing happens, he scoffs feeling tears from in his eyes again. Simon looks up at him and frowns, stopping what he’s doing. 

“What is it, Johnny?” He asks, resting his free hand on Johnny’s knee. 

“Nowt.” Johnny says, shaking his head, Simon sighs and squeezes his knee. It’s gentle but reassuring. Johnny looks down at the man he would give up the world for. The man he will spend his whole life proving that to only he can’t, not in the way Simon deserves. 

“I love ye.” Johnny snaps letting the tears come as the throbbing in his head slowly starts to come back. Simon lets go of his ankle resting both his hands on Johnny’s thighs. 

“I know, I love you too, Johnny.” he says with worry plastered on his face. “What’s wrong?” 

“You deserve better.” He says finally. Simon lets out a little sigh of relief, he stands up so his head is level with Johnny. His hands slowly work their way up his arms and to his shoulders. Simon squeezes them before running them over to cup his neck. It makes Johnny shiver as Simon’s thumbs trace his chin. 

“I have everything I could ever want and more.” Simon says his hands move up to cup his face. His words make a warmth bloom in Johnny’s chest. It only lasts a second before it’s replaced with the overwhelming feeling of disappointment. 

“I’m useless, can’t even make ye a cuppa.” Johnny says, Simon smiles slightly before pressing a quick kiss on his lips. It shocks Johnny but it has him wanting more, he wants to press his tongue into Simon’s mouth and drink him up - kiss him like it’s the first time they ever kissed. He can do that at least. 

“I can make my own tea. You’re not useless, you're bloody perfect.” 

“I’m broken.” 

“So?” Simon says, raising an eyebrow. “Who isn't? To me you’re perfect, I would take you broke, bruised, missing an arm and a leg. Whatever, however, I love you so fuckin’ much Johnny.” 

“Really?” Johnny asks, almost not believing the words out of Simon's mouth. Simon smiles and leans in to kiss him. This time Johnny pushes his tongue past his lips to drag it along Simon’s. The kiss is deep and slow, Simon’s grip on his face is gentle but grounding it’s perfect. 

There are not many things in Johnny’s life that are perfect but Simon Riley is one of them. When he breaks from the kiss Johnny smiles at him, Simon smiles back moving his hands from Johnny’s face to his shoulders. 

“Fuck the clothes.” Johnny says, dropping the towel from his shoulders. Simon drops his hands down to his chest, Johnny watches his eyes soak in each part of him. His fingers brush over his nipples making Johnny’s cock twitch. They haven’t had sex since Johnny woke up from his coma, another thing Johnny can’t give to him. 

Simon never complains though, he doesn’t say a word when Johnny grinds against him and Simon goes down to suck him off and he never complains when the most Johnny can muster is a quick handjob. Simon's fingers gently pull the towel to reveal Johnny’s half hard cock, clearly his brain is more fucked up then he though since he can go from suicidal one second to horny the next. 

Simon - a man of few words - kneels down and Johnny automatically spreads his legs, Simon moves the towel out the way then reaches over to pick up Johnny’s cock. He presses a kiss on the tip that makes Johnny tip his head back. Simon gives him a good few tugs, wetting his lips before locking his mouth around the head.

Johnny almost cums right there, instead his cock throbs in Simon’s mouth. His hands move to his thighs and run up to his stomach. 

“Lay back, Johnny.” Simon says in a low voice quickly taking his mouth off him. Johnny nods in response letting himself lay back on the bed. 

“Good boy.” Oh fuck. He forgot how much he missed this, missed Simon running his hands over him. How he talks in that low grumbling voice. The way he knows exactly where and when to touch Johnny. Simon presses his tongue hard onto the underside of his cock as he takes him all the way.

“Fu-fuck Si.” Johnny breaths his hands gripping onto the bedding for dear life. It feels like he’s about to take off, his whole body pulses with energy, the pain in his head and arms being replaced with pure pleasure. Simon makes such pretty noises too, rewarding Johnny’s moans with his own that send vibrations straight down his cock. 

He’s not going to be able to last, another thing the shooting took - or maybe it’s the lack of sex making him out of practice - regardless he reaches down with his hand finding one of Simon’s hand laces his fingers with his. 

“Simon, Simon..” Johnny maons with each thrust of Simons mouth. On the next thrust he comes, Simon slows working him through the orgasm. He keps going until Johnny’s leg twitches from overstimulation, it hurts and Simon pulls his mouth off him. 

“Sorry.” he says, Johnny looks up at him standing between his legs. Johnny sucks in some long breaths as Simon kicks his boots off. 

“C’mon, let's get you into bed.” He says pulling his belt and jeans off. Johnny can see how hard he is too. 

“Want me too...” Johnny trails off, Simon shakes his head and pulls his shirt off over his head. Johnny can see each muscle on his chest, each scar. He soaks him up wishing he had the strength to sit up and press kisses all over him. Instead he has to lay there and wait for Simon’s help. 

Simon moves him gently and slow pulling the covers back and helping him move under them. As soon as he’s comfortable Simon climbs in behind him wrapping his arms around him. Johnny can feel his softening cock pressed against his lower back.

“Thank you.” Johnny breaths. “I needed that.” 

“I know.” Simon says kissing the back of his head. Johnny sighs and closes his eyes. 

“I love you so much Si.” 

“I love you too, Johnny.” He says with another kiss. “Whatever happens, I will always be here. I got you Johnny and we’re going to get through this, thick and thin, until the end.” 

Johnny’s heart warms at his words and he squeezes Simon arms, Simon squeezes him back relaxing against the pillow. 

Maybe today isn’t going to be so bad after all.  

___

[moody-alcoholic]

I'm absolutely obsessed with your brat taming with bratty reader Kyle and Johnny🥰

I was wondering if you'd do something similar where they decided to drag john and Simon to a club (or something else that really isn't their scene) and they make it their mission to have John and Simon boiling with rage and jealously by the end of the evening.

Thank you!🥰

-🦊

I am so sorry this ask has taken me so long. I hope this is worth it. ❤️

Poly141 x reader

CW: +18 explicit content MDNI. alcohol, sex, fingering, sub/dom dynamics, oral (M receiving), overstimulation, jealousy.

can you tell I've never been to a club before??

___

Johnny crashes through the wreck room door first. 

John and Simon are sat on the couch, it has been a slow few days. They’ve not been anywhere, Shepherd has been off their backs and you’ve all actually got some downtime. He picks up a pillow off the sofa and throws it at Simon. 

“What the hell Johnny!?” Simon calls. 

“Do either of you know what day it is?” He asks angrily, resting his hands on his hips. 

“Tuesday?” John asks. 

“Useless, you’re both useless.” He says, shaking his head. He’s about to explain but you walk through the door. You frown at Johnny as you make it around the corner. You see John and Simon sat on the sofas. 

You’re not in the mood to talk to them. They forgot your birthday. 

“Cup of tea Johnny?” You ask digging your eyes into John. 

“Ta thanks.” he says. You hum and walk over to the kitchenette turning the kettle on. You sigh and turn back to look at them all crossing your arms. 

“I think we should go out tonight Johnny and celebrate. What do you think?” You ask him. 

“I’m up for anything, lass. Where do you want to go?” He asks. 

“There’s a club in the next town over.” You say shrugging. 

“I don’t know about that.” John says, raising an eyebrow. You watch as Kyle comes into the room smiling at you. 

“We’re going out to a club tonight.” You say to him. 

“Really?” He says smiling, then looking at John and Simon on the sofa. “That’s going to be fun.” 

“No way.” Simon says, starting to get up.

“Sit down Simon. You owe me.” You say pointing at him. He sighs and sits down. 

“We have no training this weekend. It’s been weeks - no months since we’ve all been out.” You say. 

“Why a club though? Why not just down to the pub for a few?” John asks.

“Because it’s my birthday and I get to pick.” You say smiling. Johnny and Kyle are already excited, you know that, they’re game for anything that will get them off this base. 

They exchange glances and eventually John gets up. He comes over to you. 

“Are you sure you want to go out to a club?” He asks. You nod and he kisses you on the top of the head. 

“Okay,” he says, turning around to look at Simon. “We’re going to a club.” 

___

Johnny knew the guy on security. Of course he does, which means when you walk up to the club you all get in right away. You always bring a dress with you on deployment, you’re not sure why, maybe you hope you’ll get an opportunity like this more often. Really you think it’s just so you have something to surprise the boys with if they ever decided to take you out or something. 

Whatever the case, you’re glad you bought one. The club is loud and the atmosphere is great, you head straight over to the bar almost dragging Johnny with you. 

“What do you want?” He shouts over the music, waving the bar tender over. 

“Anything but tequila.” You and Kyle call back at the same time. Johnny laughs and orders vodka. You turn to see Simon and Price walking over to you all. They look like fish out of water, they look good but absolutely out of place. John wanted to wear a hat but you all managed to convince him not to. Simon always has a nice collection of jeans and it wasn’t hard for you to find shirts for John and him. 

“C’mon!” You call at them. They make it over to you as the bartender finishes the shots. If you had alcohol on the base you would have pre-gamed at the barracks but all you had was John’s stash of scotch. You hand shots to John and Simon who reluctantly take them. 

“Slàinte!” Johnny calls before you all tip the shot back. You grimace as the alcohol burns your throat placing the glass on the counter as Johnny calls the bartender over again. One shot is enough to make your head swim straight away though. You smile at John and Simon as you take their glasses off them. 

Simon pulls his mask back up, you’re surprised they even let him in the club with that on. The music changes and Kyle throws his arm over your shoulder. 

“Wanna dance, love?” He asks. You nod accepting the next shot from Johnny and handing it to Kyle. 

“Think we can leave these two alone?” You ask, nodding towards Simon and John. Kyle laughs and you clink your shot glasses together before throwing the shot back. 

“Johnny’ll keep an eye on them c’mon, let's dance.” He says taking a step towards the dancefloor. You take his hand and let him drag you towards the floor. You smile as you pass John and Simon who still -after 2 shots - look even more out of place. 

You dance with Kyle then eventually Johnny Joins. Kyle always attracts attention and before you know it there are already two women pulling him away from you. 

Johnny’s next, as soon as he whips out that deep Scottish voice women just swoon. Eventually he’s left you too being dragged away by a red head with a dress that leaves nothing to the imagination. You tut tolling your eyes. It’s only a few seconds later that a man catches your eye. 

You see him smile at you and wink. You know he wants to dance with you and you watch as he slowly starts to make his way over. You should probably go check on Simon or John, make sure they haven’t run away yet. 

You look for Johnny and Kyle in the crowd but you can’t see them, the music pounds in your ears pulsing through you then you feel a hand on your hip but you don’t recognize it. You turn to see the stranger behind you. 

“You here alone?” He asks. 

“Who comes to a club alone?” You tease. You want to get away from him already though. Whatever plan you were thinking about vanishes when you back up into someone's chest. The stranger's hand drops from your waist and you turn to see Simon staring down the man. 

“Eazy Si.” you chuckle jabbing his shoulder. He crosses his arms and you scoff, shaking your head. You turn to see the man has scarpered off. You sigh, grabbing Simon by his arm and dragging him back to the bar. 

You call the bartender over.

“Where’s John?” You ask. 

“Picked another observation spot.” He says like you’re on an job. 

“Obser-” You laugh. “It’s not a fucking op.” 

“From him.” The bartender says placing a drink in front of you.

You hold your drink up and nod at the man across the bar. You see Johnny pass him winking at you on the way to the bathrooms, you shake your head rolling your eyes. 

“Whats that?” Simon asks. 

 “He bought me a drink.” You say waving at a different stranger. Simon reaches over to pick up the glass pulling his mask down and taking a sip of the drink. You frown at him hitting his chest. 

“Hey!”

“Never trust-” 

“A drink the bartender made?” You interrupt him. Taking the drink out of his hand. Simon hums pulling his mask back up. 

“Where’s Johnny?” He asks, looking around. 

“Bathroom.” You say sipping on your drink. Simon’s off in a flash, his hand was on your thigh, you missed that. 

“We need to do something about these two.” Kyle says slipping into the spot where Simon was. 

“I know. Simon’s gone to find Johnny in the bathroom.” You say sipping on your drink. 

“John’s perched at the other side of the room like he’s running surveillance.” Kyle says. “Has an earpiece in and everything.” 

“Fucks sake.” You breathe, you take another sip of your drink but it sits heavy in your stomach. “Maybe we should go.” 

“No.” Kyle says coming to stand in front of you, you look up at him. “It’s your birthday, fuck them let them have their fun. You should be having fun!” Kyle takes your drink out your hand putting it on the bar. 

“C’mon, let's dance!” He says dragging you back towards the floor. He wraps one of his arms around your waist pulling you close to him. 

“Let's make them jealous." He says in your ear. You look up at him and smile. You like this idea, and you lean up to kiss him. He smiles as you break from the kiss and you dance close to each other. 

Your chests are practically pressed together as you move in time with the music. You focus on him and no one else, your eyes getting lost in his. You run your hands up his body and he does the same with his hands moving up to cup your face as your hands grip his waist. 

“Fuck, you look hot.” You say. You can feel the alcohol getting to you, Kyle wets his lips and you see them glisten in the light. It makes your heart pump faster as the music speeds up. Suddenly you feel hands around your waist. 

You freeze.

“Are we already trying to make them jealous?” Johnny’s voice hums in your ear. You look up at Kyle who smiles. Now Johnny’s behind you rocking his body up against yours, his hands travel up your sides. 

Kyle chuckles burying his face into your neck. He sucks on the soft skin while Johnny’s hands run around the curve of your arse and breasts. Keep this up and you’ll all get kicked out. You don’t care though it’s not about the club it’s about winding up Johnny and Simon. 

The music seems to get louder and Johnny and Kyle move you to the other side of the dancefloor.

“Ghost’s behind me, 5 o’clock.” Johnny says. “Price’s on your 6.” 

“Fuckin’ hell.” You whisper as Johnny squeezes your arse. You don’t even care if the jealousy is working or not the way they’re touching you you’d fuck them right here on the dancefloor. You turn in their arms and press your lips up to Johnny. You kiss him fast and needy, it’s a sloppy mix of teeth and tongue but you don’t care. 

“I’d do you right here, Johnny.” You say. He gets a cheeky grin on his face. 

“Na, too many people.” He grabs your wrists and pulls you away from the floor. Kyle seems to know what's going on too and he follows you both. You’re led to what you think is the bathrooms only there’s no smell of piss or people making out in the hall. 

In fact, it's unusually quiet. You don’t care, it’s private and Johnny has his hands down the front of your dress. Kyle’s pulling the bottom of your dress up and his hand is down your underwear. They hold you between them, attacking your body. 

Suddenly there's a crash and you all turn to see Simon and John barreling towards you. Simon pulls Johnny off your back and pins him against the wall. 

“Can’t keep it in your pants for two bloody minutes can you Johnny?” Simon asks. Johnny laughs. 

“Can’t keep my hands off the most beautiful lass in the club Si.” Johnny retorts. John has Kyle pressed against the wall. 

“What’s your excuse Kyle?” John teases, pressing a kiss into his neck. 

“That beautiful fuckin’ ass of her’s sir.” Kyle says with a smile on his face. John turns to look at you, he looks you up and down, your dress has been pushed up over your hips and one of the straps is halfway down your arm. 

“We’re leaving!” John orders.

…

As soon as you make it back to your barracks it starts. 

John and Simon grab you all pulling you over to the sofas. Simon buries his face into your neck and his hand is in your underwear as he thrusts his fingers into you. 

“Didn’t know you’d be so jealous.” You pant. 

“Not jealous.” He says pulling his mouth off your neck. 

“Sure.” Johnny chuckles, you turn to see him pulling his mouth off John’s cock. Simon thrusts his fingers into you faster and you throw your head back moaning. 

“What? Couldn’t stand it?” You tease looking down at Simon. They’d dropped the facade of being sneaky about watching you all about half way home. The earpieces came out as you straddled John in the back of the taxi. You pulled his earpiece out and the radio off his hip as his cheeks turned red with guilt.

“Fuck, where’s the lube?” Kyle asks. It snaps you out of your head and you hear John moan. You look over at Kyle who’s full naked now lining himself against John’s arse as Johnny runs his mouth over John’s chest. 

“Fuck.” You cry out, watching them is so hot. You’re too tipsy to think properly as the first orgasm washes over you. Your body squirms as Simon’s fingers relentlessly fuck you through the overstimulation. You’re twitching against him, his palm is relentless on your clit as you throb around his fingers.

“Si-Simon!” You call.

“You can do it. Give me another.” He orders. You nod as the sound of Kyle's hips slapping against John’s arse.

“Ye-yes.” You cry. His fingers stop, you look down at him in frustration. 

“Simon!” You snap.

“Yes what?” He growls. You laugh, now he’s the one making the rules? 

“Admit you were jealous." You say.

“I’m the one with my fingers in your cunt.” He says. 

“Yeah? I could have had Johnny and Kyle if you two hadn't interrupted.” You say tipping your head to the side. 

“And you would have begged to join.” Johnny says. 

“I would have fucked our girl in an appropriate enviroment.” Simon spits back. Kyle stills, causing John to moan in frustration. 

“Go on John. Are you jealous?” Kyle asks. 

“Never.” John says between pants. You look over at Kyle and Johnny who also exchange glances. 

A cheeky smile grows on your face as you look back down at Simon. The night’s not over yet.

___

[moody-alcoholic]

These Violent Delights

Chapter 40 - Love Will Come To You

Summary: Poly 141 x fem!reader, a/b/o alternate universe 8.5k words. This is the healing chapter.

CW: +18 content MDNI. a/b/o alternative universe, a/b/o dynamics, typical a/b/o universe tropes, mentions of previous SA, mentions & description of sexual kink (megalophilia), hurt/comfort, angst, sex, PiV sex, Oral (F receiving), threesome - MMF, fingering, gentle sex, sex after trauma, mentions of birth control, smoking.

Previous - masterlist - next AO3

Enjoy <3

The next morning John offers to cook you breakfast while Kyle and Simon go out to the store. Johnny was still asleep when you left, you both snuck out the nest heading into the kitchen. He bought the laptop over and set it up so you could look at houses in the lake district. 

“It’s very pretty.” He says as you show him the house, he nods as he cooks you both omelets. 

“I like the stone.” You say, it’s like Johnny’s house with a big living room. “Maybe Johnny can have a room to paint in.” 

“Yeah, I think he’d like that.” John says 

“Do you have any hobbies?” you ask him. 

“I like to fish, there’s a lot of fishing in the lake district.” 

“Oo this one as a garage.” You say excitedly, that's convenient. You keep looking and clicking on anything that looks remotely nice. You’re almost spoiled for choice. 

“What are you doing, love?” Johnny asks stretching and pressing a kiss on the top of your head  as he comes to sit next to you. 

“John said I should look at houses.” You say. 

“They’re a bit out of his price range I think.” He says. 

“I said not to worry about the price.” John says, you look over the laptop and smile at him. 

“In that case,” Johnny pulls the laptop over to him. “Let me show you how to find the good places.” 

“I want a big living room, so we can make it into one big nest. And a room for you to do art in. And a garage. Maybe you should have a room for a gym aswell.” You say, John chuckles.

“Okay, love anything else?” Johnny asks, chuckling. 

“Can we get a pet?” A dog and maybe a cat. I’ve always wanted a dog.” You say. 

“Maybe.” Johnny says before clicking on a house. “This one has solar panels, that’ll save you some money.” 

“Look at the size of the bath!” You call pointing at the triangle shaped bath tucked into the corner. 

“I bet we could all fit in that.” Johnny chuckles. You smile up at John who smiles back starting to plate up the food. Suddenly you’re hit with an overwhelming feeling of sadness. Mint fills the air cutting through the amazing smell of John’s food. 

Johnny’s hand lands on your thigh and John puts everything down to come and wrap his arms around you from behind. He presses a kiss into your neck as the mint is slowly replaced with their scent. 

“What is it?” John asks. You sigh. 

“Just. I have no idea what to do with my life.” You admit. Johnny squeezes your thigh and John presses another kiss into your neck. 

“We’ll figure it out. You have all the time in the world to figure it out.” John says, you smile and nod. “Now tell me more about this bathroom.”

It’s late evening when you tell John and Simon you’re ready. 

You technically told them around lunch time but they wanted to give you a few hours so you were sure. Since then things have been super chill. Everyone just got on with what they needed to do and that’s what you needed. Sex isn’t a big thing, it’s not something that needs to be prepared for. 

You’re lounging around with Kyle and Johnny but Simon and John pop in every now and then. When they start projecting their scents, filling the room with their alpha and you know they’re ready. The next time John comes into the room you follow him. 

No one says anything. There isn’t even a witty quip from Johnny, John’s hand lands on the small of your back as you walk up the stairs to the master bedroom, the only room that still has a mattress and is made up. You pause at the door and turn to look at John.

“Thank you.” You say, he smiles, his hand runs up your arm and the side of your neck. 

“If anything, anything is too much then you just say and everything will stop.” He says, you can see the seriousness in his eyes.

“Do I need a safeword?” You ask remember that one training exercise you did way back in America. He smiles and leans down to kiss you.

“Purple.” He says, it makes you smile that he remembers. “Or just tap us, whatever you want. You’re in control, no one else but you.” You smile at him one last time and turn back to the door. When you walk in Simon stands up from the bed and comes over to you. They’ve kept the lighting in the room low and the fire is lit. 

“Hey, love.” Simon says his hands gently cupping the sides of your neck. His thumbs run across your cheekbones. It’s gentle and reassuring, they’re both moving slow. Only taking steps or making moves when they know you’re happy with it. 

John moves from behind you pulling his shirt from over his head and sitting on the bed, you’re already walking towards him before you can stop yourself. You run your hands up his torso, your fingers slide through his chest hair then you find a scar to trace. 

He shuffles back on the bed and spreads his legs, his hand grips your wrist pulling you closer to him and your knees hit the bed. Simon comes up behind you wrapping his arms around you. 

“You’re going to sit on the bed and John’s going to hold you.” He says low and slow in your ear. “We’re going to hold you and we’re never going to let you go again. Your alpha’s will take care of you.” A warmth blooms in you as you hear the words out his mouth. As you look at John, you almost want to cry. 

You turn around in Simon's arms, he smiles and kisses you deep and slow, his tongue filling your mouth and sliding against yours. You run your hands up Simon’s top and his hands land on your waist slipping under your top. You break from the kiss, raising your arms and letting him take it off. You ditched the bra a few hours ago. 

You’re topless in front of them again, it doesn’t feel awkward or scary, it feels right. Simon's hands tug on your PJ shorts next and you slip them off with your underwear. Now you’re fully naked for them, John’s hands replace Simons and he pulls you backwards towards the bed as Simon takes his shirt off. 

You sit on the bed between John’s legs, he must be naked too, you feel his half-hard cock against your back as he pulls you a little further onto the bed. He’s already getting harder as he presses kisses in your neck. His lips brush Kyle's scar and it makes you shiver. 

“Sorry,” he says, stopping immediately and pulling his face away. Simon beds down between your legs, he’s also stripped down but you weren’t paying attention. 

“It’s okay.” You say. They both wait watching you for a few seconds, you smile at Simon who smiles back and presses a kiss on your thigh. 

“We’ve got you.” John says as he pulls you back against his chest. “Are you going to let him take care of you?”

“Yes.” You say, now your voice is thick with nerves. 

“Don’t worry, he’ll be gentle.” John says in your ear, you nod. “You’re going to tell him to stop if it’s too much.” You nod again. 

Simon is slow, moving up your legs, pressing kisses along your thighs. His arms hook under your knees gently pulling your legs apart. He keeps his eyes on you as he presses kisses on the soft skin of your thighs. You watch him move slowly as he gets closer to your pussy. 

When he‘s almost there he stops for a second before resting his hands on the top of your thighs. His breath is warm and he uses his thumbs to spread your folds to reveal you to him. 

“Ready?” Simon asks. You nod at him. 

“Words, love.” He says.

“Y-yes please, alpha.” You say, John hums in your neck and Simon smiles. They both like that, Simon smiles then presses his mouth on your clit. 

“Oh- fuck.” You call out. 

“That’s it, love.” John breathes into your neck. “Let me play with you too.” He says his hands are gripping your breasts, his thumbs brushing over your nipples.. 

“Please, alpha.” You whimper already grinding your hips against Simon’s mouth. “Don’t stop.” 

“Never.” John says, pressing a kiss into your neck. You moan out reaching down to run one of your hands through Simon’s hair. You didn’t realise how much you’ve missed this, how much you needed this. It’s like fireworks through your body as Simon’s tongue slowly speeds up.

“Our perfect omega.” John says. “We’re going to take such good care of you, and you’re going to be so good for us.” 

You hum at the praise and it makes heat rush to your cheeks. You will be good for them, you’ll let them do whatever you want. You don’t care. This is a safe space, you are safe with your pack. You can’t stop yourself, the first orgasm comes out of nowhere. You feel Simon push you over the peak with one more flick of his tongue. 

You cry out, your hand gripping his head to push him down on you as he rides you through the orgasm. Your breathing turns to pants as your heart thumps in your chest. It feels amazing, it’s nothing like the Professor. You gasp and stiffen up as his face flashes in your head and Simon pushes you over to the point of overstimulation. 

As soon as you shake he pulls his mouth off you and sits back.

“Easy, love. You're doing so well for us, I'm going to open you up some more. So you’ll be ready to take our cocks.” Simon says, his voice low sending shivers up your spine. Your breathing picks up but you blow it out and relax again. You’re here with your pack now, the people who love you. You don’t need to think about the Professor, he doesn’t deserve you thinking about him. 

John presses a kiss into your neck. “You’re okay, you’re doing so well. Just relax.” He says, you smell him projecting his scent; it's refreshing, overpowering some of the vanilla in the room. You let out a long breath as Simon stands waiting for you to be ready.

His cock sits heavy and hard as he runs his hand down. You don’t know if you’re ready for Simon quite yet, you always forget how big he is compared to the others. You remember what he said though and before you can say anything he’s back on his knees by your feet. 

You spread your legs for him again and relax like John instructed as his hands run up the inside of your thighs. His thumb brushes over your clit and you sigh - the brief contact makes a shiver run up your spine. 

John hums breathing in your change in scent, his alpha disperses leaving you with the thick smell of vanilla again. Simon’s hand moves down to your entrance and he looks up at you. 

“Ready?” He asks in that low droning voice, you’re pretty sure you’d agree to anything when he uses that tone. You nod and he smiles pressing one finger into you. Even his finger is thick and you clench around him. 

“Relax.” He says as he drags his finger out before adding another one. This time the stretch makes you moan and grit your teeth but you don’t squeeze around him this time. That makes him smile and he keeps dragging his fingers in and out slowly increasing the pace. 

“Want me to play with your nipples again?” John asks. 

“Yes please, alpha.” You reply. You’re not sure why you’re being so formal you don’t care, everything feels too good. Simon curls his fingers up inside you, hitting that spongy spot inside of you. He knows how it makes you feel and you melt against John even more as he whispers praise into your hair. 

“Love you so much.” John breathes. 

“I love you too.” You reply, your breath hitches in your throat as Simom moves his other hand to your clit. As soon as his fingers brush it you moan, John keeps pressing kisses into your neck. 

“So perfect for us.” Simon says. “You feel that? You’re so soft, practically sucking me in.” As he says it you clench around him and he rewards you with nice deep strokes. 

“Can I add another finger?” Simon asks. 

“Please.” You say. He chuckles and on his next pull he adds a third finger. There’s the sting, the feel of him stretching you out. It makes you shiver though as you feel yourself getting closer and closer to the edge. 

“Al- Simon.” You call reaching out for him. 

“Make her cum Simon.” John orders his voice hot in your ear. Please, yes. All you can do is pant, your eyes roll back as you let go crying out and gripping onto Simon's arm. 

“Christ, love. You’re bloody perfect.” John says as a new smell fills the air. You sit up as you flair your nostrils, breathing it in. 

“What’s that?” You ask. 

“Cinnamon.” Simon says wiping his hand on the bed before cupping your face with his hands. “Thats what you smell like when you cum.” 

“You smell like leather.” You say breathing in the scent again. You’ve always wondered what you smelt like. You look up at Simon, he’s still towering above you. They both move you slowly scooting you closer to the edge of the bed. You spread your legs further and Simon steps between them, his cock rests on your stomach. You reach down to run your hand down his cock.

He’s warm and wet with precome, it makes your mouth water and your pussy flutters. The thought of not only him but John fucking you is now no longer a horrible thought it’s something that feels right. 

“I want this.” You say looking up at him. He smiles and leans down to kiss you, one of his hands coming up to cup your face. 

“I know. I’ll be gentle.” he says. You nod and he replaces your hand with his standing up and giving himself a few long tugs. He’s way bigger than the others, thicker, the head of his cock is red and throbbing. You feel your heart rate pick up again as anticipation rises in you. The smell of your nerves cuts through the vanilla. 

“Let me help.” John says shuffling, his cock’s still pressing into your lower back. It must be uncomfortable but he doesn’t complain. His hand travels down your body to your clit. He’s gentle, rubbing small circles forcing you to relax against him. It helps and you watch Simon lock eyes with John. 

“Ready?” Simon asks, you nod and smile at him. He rubs the tip of his cock against your entrance, you watch him as he slowly presses into you. The stretch burns even though he stretched you out with his fingers. You let out a long shaky breath, it burns but it feels good. 

“You’re doing so well love.” Simon says pressing a quick kiss on your cheek, you smile at him and he presses in a little further causing you to moan out. It's followed by a new scent you can’t quite place. Simon and John instantly react to it. Simon stills and John moves his hand from your clit to wrap his arms around you holding you tight against him. You smell John projecting his scent for you. 

Fear, your body is reacting to them with fear. You’re not scared though and you squirm in John’s arms.

“Easy.” John says as you stop tensing up. You know you should be relaxing, if you relax it will be easier. Maybe you weren't ready. 

“Breathe, love.” Simon doesn’t move, he's like a statue waiting for you to calm before he moves. You take in a big breath and blow it out relaxing around him. 

“Good girl.” Simon says, one of his hands lands on your abdomen and his thumb reaches down to rub your clit. It’s the distraction you needed and you moan as you relax against John who still holds you tight. One of your hands runs up Simon’s body stopping at his chest. You can feel his rapid heartbeat. 

He inches into you further you feel the burn and the stretch as he’s almost all the way inside. You feel him twitch as he continues, you don’t want him to stop, you feel that blissed out feeling come back into your chest. He moans as he presses all the way into you.

“Si-Simon.” You say clenching around him. 

“Yeah?” He asks without moving. You smile and look up at him, his eyes are glazed over, his arms are tucked under your knees and you’re basically suspended off the bed but John keeps a good grip on you. 

“Fuck me please.” you say. His cock throbs again and he slowly starts to buck his hips. 

“I’m not going to fuck you.” He says, he presses his forehead to yours. “We should be taking care of you. We’re not going to fuck, from now on we make love.” 

“Even when I’m in heat?” You ask, he stands back up and smiles at you. 

“Especally when you’re in heat.”

It makes you smile and your heart flutters. John’s cock twitches behind you too as you watch Simon. He starts slowly, his eyes watching your every reaction. You breathe out for him, moaning to let him know you’re okay. You feel so full, John will be easier, maybe you should have started with him but honestly you don’t care. 

It feels good to have your alphas back, it feels right with Simon's cock dragging in and out of you while John mutters praises and plays with your nipples. 

“Good girl, you’re doing so well for him.” John says, you mumble back at him as Simon picks your legs up higher, hitting deeper inside of you. “Does he feel good? You better be making her feel good Simon.” 

“I feel good. He feels good.” You pant between thrusts. John hums, pressing another kiss into your neck, it sends vibrations through your body and you cry out clenching around Simon. 

“Love, fuck!” He growls, his alpha fills the air. John's cock twitches behind you, his mouth nipping at your ears. “You feel perfect, you know that? Our perfect omega.” 

“Your omega.” You mumble.

“Our omega.” John repeats. Simon speeds up his breathing turning into pants. You can feel a deep heat coil in your belly as John drops one of his fingers to your clit and speeds up to match Simon’s. Your moaning starts to turn into cries as you get closer to the edge.

“P-please-” The words catch in your throat you throw your head back and close your eyes. 

“What, love? Do you want him to make you cum?” John asks. You nod frantically. 

“Please. Alpha.” You say. You hear Simon growl pressing his cock into you deeper and faster. You didn’t think it was possible. His mouth locks around your neck as he stabilises himself on the bed, he sucks your neck moaning, it sends vibrations down your spine. You can’t hold back anymore and you come with a cry while they both attack your neck. 

Simon comes a thrust later and he pants in your neck. Their teeth nip at your skin, all you can think about is them claiming you, their teeth digging into your skin and leaving their mark forever. Instead they leave you with soft kisses and gentle sucks leaving red marks on your skin.

“We got you.” John says as Simon slips out of you. 

“Si.” You call reaching out for him in your haze. His hands grip your arms.

“Right here, love. Feel good?” 

“Amazing.” You breathe. 

When you’ve calmed Simon and John move you so you’re laid flat on the bed. Simon comes to lay next to you, his fingers playing with your nipples or your clit. He keeps you stimulated while John slips in between your legs. He lifts them up and Simon grabs a pillow placing it under your hips. 

“Alpha.” you call reaching out for Simon again he grabs your hand bringing it to his mouth and kisses it. 

“We’re here, love.” His voice is low, he sounds almost sleepy. 

“We’re always going to be here.” John says as he towers over you kneeling between your legs, his cock resting against your stomach. You smile at him and nod, he smiles back and moves a hand down so he can line himself up with your entrance. You feel him take some of your slick and wipe it down his cock.

“Ready?” He asks, you nod 

“Such a good omega for us.” Simon says his hand is traveling down your stomach to your clit. “Taking both your alpha’s.” He presses a kiss on your nipple before locking his mouth around it. John looks at you as he presses in. You let out a long moan as his hips become flush with yours.. 

“Alpha, feels good.” You say as John rocks his hips making cock hit the same soft spot inside you. 

“Good.” John says breathlessly. You thought it would take you way longer to come again but with Simon’s mouth and hands it’s making your body feel electric. You wish they could claim you now, you want to feel their teeth digging into your skin and making you as theirs. 

You reach down and run your fingers through Simon’s hair. John fuc- makes love to you like it’s the first time he’s inside you. It reminds you of the first time you had sex, he was gentle back then too. Only now you have Simon too. His mouth has come off your nipple in favour of pressing kisses on your face and neck. 

“You’re so good for us. You deserve all of this and more.” Simon says. You nod in response, it’s automatic now. He continues to kiss your neck and shoulders carefully to avoid the scars. John keeps a steady rhythm and you look up at him, his hands keep running up and down your thighs as Simon keeps your clit busy. 

Simon’s right this is different, it’s slow and calm. You are in charge even if it doesn’t feel like it. They react to you and your body, the way they touch you and talk to you is soft and gentle but still enough to make you cum multiple times. There’s no rush, no reason not to be here in the moment. 

This is what making love must feel like, utter bliss surrounded by the people who love you the most. 

“John.” You call closing your eyes and arching your back. His hands are digging into your thighs but you don’t care. Everything feels too good. “John, John.” His name leaves your lips with each press of his cock inside you, each slap of his hips. You reach out and grab onto Simon squeezing around John’s cock as you cum.

“Fuck.” John grunts, you feel him cum too. His cock pulsates inside of you, you’re barely listening to them as they mutter praises over you. You’re overwhelmed with their scent, it tickles the back of your brain. You squeeze Simon’s hand as John rides you through the overstimulation. 

When your body throbs you feel John pull out of you. Your whole body relaxes against the bed, the waves of pleasure are still washing over you making your whole body tingle. You feel John come and lay on the other side of you pressing a kiss on your cheek. The tickle of his beard brings you back to reality.

“Welcome back love.” Simon says with a chuckle. You turn to look at him and he leans in to kiss you. You turn to see John who’s propped up on his elbow. He also leans in to kiss you. You’re so lucky to have not just one but four people who love you. A whole pack, your pack. When you break from the kiss John reaches over to brush the hair stook to your forehead. 

You move to get up but John gently presses you back down into the bed and Simon gets up. 

“We’ll take care of you.” He says smiling and kissing your forehead. 

“I-” The words catch in your throat and you swallow, he chuckles and continues to stroke your head. 

“Shh, it’s okay. You did so well for us.” John says, you smile looking into his glazed over deep blue eyes. He projects his scent for you and it pushes you closer to the edge of sleep. Simon comes back in the room with a towel and you can hear the bath running. 

“A nice warm bath then you can take a nap.” He says, you nod and this time when you move to get up he lets you. John wipes your thighs before you slip out the bed, Simon - who is now half dressed - helps you walk to the bathroom. You climb into the bath and Simon sits on the outside helping you bathe. 

They seem to like seeing you bathe, or helping you. You don’t mind, you run your wet fingers through your hair, it’s going to take months to get back to the length it used to be. Then the first thing you’re going to do is ask Johnny to braid it. Your hand rests on Simon’s mark, your fingers feel around it and you sigh. 

Simon’s hand lands on yours and you turn to look at him. He looks sad.

“How did you really feel when you found out Johnny and Kyle had claimed me?” You ask. 

“What do you mean?” He asks.

“You said you didn’t mind that it felt right because we’re a pack.” 

“It did feel right, it still does.” you drop your hand resting hit on the side of the tub. Simon’s hand lands on yours. 

“When did you know you liked me?” You ask leaning your head against his hand. He sighs thinking for a moment, his other hand comes to brush wet hair out your face.

“In America. I don’t know if you remember but it was after Piper cut the tracker and the bomb out of you.” He sighs. “You were covered in blood. All I could smell was your pain and your fear. You had this look on your face, this look of horror I never want to ever see again.” He continues to stroke your face as you listen to him talk. His voice is gentle and low, you don’t think you’ve heard him talk about you like this before.

“I didn’t even think, I just picked you up, I saw the tears in your eyes, the blood flowing down you. You were so small in my arms, so fragile. I was going to kill whoever did that to you, I made plans, how- when I was going to kill them. I sat by your side while Soap and Price went on a rampage.” He sighs. 

“I remember.” You say looking up at him. “I remember you carrying me, I remember waking up with Johnny by my side and Piper being gone.” You feel a tear slide down your cheek Simon brushes it away. 

“When I heard it was Piper-” He scoffs, shaking his head before looking back in your eyes. “Piper made me fall in love with you. She spent hours telling me how amazing you are, how beautiful and special you are. She made me love you and that day she hurt you out of love. That's when I knew.”  

“Piper made you love me?” You ask a little disappointed. 

“You made me love you.” He says. You smile 

“I’m glad everyone claimed me. Piper didn’t think it was possible since I had been claimed by two alphas.” You say, you look up in his eyes. His eyes that shine golden in the low bathroom light. You lean over and kiss him, his arms wrap around your chest as you press your tongue into his mouth. 

You love kissing Simon, he’s slow like John and Kyle but he likes to kiss for a long time. His tongue is soft as he moans pulling you further into his mouth. You could kiss him forever and you think he could too, you smell vanilla filling the room again. You pull back from the kiss and look at his glazed over eyes. 

“We’re a pack, marks or not.” His fingers brush over his scar making goosebumps rise on the back of your neck. “We love you.” 

You smile back at him. “I love you too.” He drops his hand and helps you get out of the bath then helps you dry and change into a fresh set of pyjamas.

You’re in bliss when Simon carries you down the stairs to the nest. Johnny is laid out watching the TV. You open your eyes to see him, Johnny smiles, his eyes locking onto you. 

“There she is.” He says moving so Simon can place you down beside him. He puffs up the pillows and throws the duvet back. “You look proper fucked out, love.” All you can do is hum in response as Johnny starts to caress your face. 

“Alpha.” You call out, reaching out for Simon as he puts you down. 

“I’ll go get John.” He says pressing a kiss on your forehead before leaving the room. You frown looking at Johnny. 

“Why can’t Simon stay?” You ask, he pulls you closer to him. You need an alpha near you, you want John and Simon to be with you for the rest of the day. 

“He’s on watch.” Johnny says, looking at his wrist. You shiver as you snuggle up next to Johnny wrapping your arm around his stomach. He pulls the duvet over you. 

“You smell of leather.” You say, the room is cold. They've opened the window in an attempt to disperse the smell but it hasn’t helped.

“Sorry, love. You were making such pretty noises.” Johnny says rubbing your back. You hum, you’re exhausted and you didn’t even do any of the work. 

“I love you Johnny” You say, he chuckles and runs his hand down your back, holding you close. You hear the door open and you can smell John, he walks over getting into the nest coming to lay behind you. 

John presses a kiss into your neck. “How are you feeling?” he asks, you smile and look up at Johnny. 

“Perfect.”  

You wake with Johnny gently snoring on your chest. You turn to see Kyle awake next to you, you smile at him and he reaches over to stroke your cheek. You want to say good morning but before you get a chance he reaches up to kiss you. 

You only get a few seconds before Johnny wakes mumbling, Kyle breaks from the kiss and you both look down at him. 

“Wa? I don’t get a morning kiss?” He asks, Kyle chuckles leaning over to kiss him too. They have no idea how much watching them kiss turns you on. Then you smell vanilla in the air and they break from the kiss looking up at you. 

“Sorry.” You say. You hate that fact you can’t control your scent, it could be months before it heals properly. 

“Me next.” You say pouting. Johnny chuckles and scoots up to kiss you. Needy and sloppy just what you expected. When he breaks from the kiss he kneels up scooping you up in his arms. 

“Johnny!” You giggle as he gets to his feet unsteady on the mattresses. “Johnny put me down! I can walk!” He carries you into the kitchen. 

“Johnny put her down, if you trip and fall you’ll both get hurt.” Simon says, you giggle as he takes you over to the kitchen island. Kyle pulls out a stool and Johnny sits you down, you look up at John who’s stood leaned against the sink. 

“Tea?” He asks, sipping on his own and raising an eyebrow. You nod and feel Simon come up behind you. He wraps his arms around you and buries his head into your neck. 

“You slept through the night.” He says, you smile looking up at John, you did sleep through the night and you didn’t have any horrible dreams. 

“Do you stay up watching me or something?” You ask. 

“Sometimes.” Simon says in your ears. 

“You don’t have to do that.” You say. Although it does make you happy to know they’re always there watching over you. You smile and accept the tea off John as Simon sits down on the stool next to you. You hear a ringing noise and frown, Johnny moves and comes back placing a laptop down in front of you.

You watch as he accepts the call and Piper’s face pops up on the screen.

“Hey, hun.” She smiles. 

“Hey.” You smile back. 

“How is it being back in Scotland?” She asks. 

“Good.” You nod. Simon’s hand lands on your thigh. 

“Where’s John?” She asks, frowning. 

“I’m here.” he says and walks around the island to the see.

“Well, I have good news. We tried the cure on someone and it worked.” She says. You smile at her and get off the chair to let John have your spot. He doesn't sit down though. Kyle comes into the kitchen and you all turn to see him. 

“Piper said the cure works.” You announce. You don’t know why you feel angry, you shouldn’t feel angry. There are so many people who want the cure, like Alejandro and Rudy, even your pack - even if they don’t admit it. 

“Thats-” He stops like he’s not sure what to say. 

“It’s okay. It’s good we need a cure.” You say, you hear Piper sigh.

“We’re still not going to take it until Piper has perfected it, and if you decide you want it.” Johnny says from the other side of the island staring you down. 

“How is that going?” John asks. 

“Nothing new yet. We’re trying some new tests, the results are going to take a few days.” She says. You don’t want to talk about this, you don’t want to hear about how well Piper is doing and that she has a working cure. You can’t tell how you feel. It's like a rush of emotions, it feels like you can’t control it. 

You drowned out John and Piper talking, you can’t tell what scent is filling the air. You wanted a choice then you didn’t get one and now you have to make a decision that not only affects your life but the people you love. People who were once normal and had a life without you. Now you’ve dragged them into this world.

Simon’s hand lands on your shoulder. 

“Tomorrow.” You say suddenly stepping up and grabbing John’s shirt. “Tomorrow I want you to force my heat.” He turns around and frowns at you. You feel heat rushing to your cheeks. You have no idea where that came from.

“Okay.” John says, raising an eyebrow, his hand rubs the top of your arm. 

“I’m not on birth control anymore.” You say looking past them to Piper. 

“You are. I injected you with two of the implants. Hale only took one out.” She says. “In case he ever removed it without me knowing you had a second one that he didn’t know about.” 

“That was smart.” John says.

“Or fucked up.” Johnny whispers, there’s anger in his voice. It makes the hairs stand up on the back of your neck. Before you can stop it your nerves fill the air.

“Johnny.” Simon warns, his alpha fills the space; it doesn’t make you any less nervous. 

“It’s okay.” Piper says.

“I don’t remember.” You admit, squeezing the top of your other arm trying to feel for it. Maybe it’s not even in your arm. Kyle comes over to you wrapping his arm around your waist. 

“It was best if you didn’t know, just in case you accidentally let it slip.” She explains. No one says anything, there’s a heavy silence in the room. You step forward out of Kyle’s arm, John moves out the way so Piper has a full view of you.

“I keep having this dream. I wake up on a surgery table and then in the medical room. You told me the Professor’s friends were rough. I had a fresh scar on my abdomen. Was that real?” You ask, John’s hand lands on your shoulder and you shove it off.

She sighs, dipping her head. “Yes.”  

“We don’t have to talk about this.” John says. 

“What happened?” You ask. 

“John’s right, we shouldn’t talk about this now.” She says. 

“Please. I want to know.” You say taking another step up to the laptop. She sighs and you see her eyes flick up. 

“One of his friends had a kink we didn’t know about.” She says. You frown and hear Johnny sigh and cross his arms. “He liked big objects and specifically large objects being forced into people.” 

You swallow, you feel like you already know where this is going. 

“He ruptured the walls of your vagina. The reason you were awake on the table was because you had just finished your heat putting you under general anesthetic could have killed you.” She explains.

You feel sick, you’re not sure what to do. 

“Thank you. For being honest.” You say, you and take a step to the living room, you’re heading for your nest. That's where you need to be right now. Kyle steps in front of you blocking you from going any further. His hands gently land on your arms, you press one of yours on his chest. 

“I’m tired.” You say. He kisses your forehead. 

“Okay, go for a nap.” He says moving to the side and you drop your hand from his chest. “We’re always here if you need us.” 

“I know, thank you.” You say and walk into the living room collapsing into your nest. 

…

“That was a terrible idea.” Johnny says.

“Calm down, she's okay.” John says, they all watch as Kyle walks back into the dining room closing the door behind him. 

“She’s asleep.” He says, there's a collective sigh of relief. 

“She’s been resting better since we’ve been back.” Simon says.

“Being somewhere safe, being surrounded by her pack it’s only natural. Creating a nest in the living room was a good idea.” Piper says. “How is her neck looking?” 

“Better, it looks like it’s a few months old rather than days." Kyle says. 

“That's good. You should be able to mark her again. Although it might be painful for her.” She says. 

“More than usual?” John asks. 

“Yes, the skin is still fresh and healing. Keep towels nearby or tissues in case there is any blood. If it doesn’t immediately start to heal then you may need to wrap it on a bandage.” Piper explains. “It will be harder for the back of her neck, she’s had two marks removed from there recently.” 

Simon sighs and John looks up at him.

‘Not if she’s in pain’

‘She won't be’

“We can’t avoid it.” John says. “If we force her heat and don’t claim her, she'll be upset.” 

“We could convince her to wait.” Kyle says. 

“Good luck.” Johnny scoffs. John sighs and looks at Simon. They both felt it yesterday, they need you, they want you. It was strange having sex again and knowing you’re not claimed by them. They could feel it. They want to claim you again too, it’ll be stronger when you’re in heat.

“She needs us to be strong for her.” John says, they all nod. “We will claim her, we all need it as much as she does.” 

“Not if it’s going to hurt her.” Simon says, John’s eyes flick up to him. 

“It’ll hurt her more if we don’t claim her.” Kyle says. He’s right, you’re doing so well. It could set you back if you come back from your heat and realise they haven’t claimed you. What will that mean to you, that they don’t love you?

“Be careful John. Even though you’re a pack there is still a chance you will all fight over her.” Piper says John looks down at her. “She is technically unclaimed again. Make sure the betas can get some rest, they’re going to need it if you want them to take care of you and the omega. And be careful, she could suffer from heat exhaustion again, there are 4 of you this time.” 

“Thank you.” He says. 

“Do you want me to come up in a few days?” She asks. 

“No, we’ll let you know if we need you.” John says. 

“Take care of yourselves. I mean it.” She says. John nods and ends the call, he closes the laptop. He sighs, spreads his hands on the kitchen island and lets out a long breath. 

“We can do this Cap.” Kyle says resting his hand on John’s shoulder.

“She’ll be okay. She’s safe here. We’re in control.” Johnny says. 

“No.” John snaps, turning to look at him. Kyle’s hand drops from his shoulder. “She’s in control.” 

“How did it go today?” Kyle asks, trying his best to change the subject. There’s silence for a few seconds. 

“Well.” Simon steps up. “She did well.” 

“She’s been through hell. Today was about healing.” John says looking around everyone. “When she’s in heat, she’s not aware so we need to take extra care. We need to make sure that heat or no heat she knows she never goes through the hell she went through in the bunker ever again.”

“Agreed.” Johnny nods. Kyle’s hand goes back on John’s shoulder, he turns to see him, Kyle reaches up and cups his face. 

“John, it’s over. She’s safe.” Kyle says he sees tears build in John’s eyes. “She’s safe. You and Si, you took care of her. You should get some rest.” 

John shakes his head “I need to be with her.” 

“Price.” Simon says with authority in his voice. John turns and looks over at him. 

“She needs this.” 

“Yeah, she does.” Simon says coming over to John. His hand lands on his shoulders. “But you need rest.” 

“Everyone needs rest.” John says.

“So we do it today. If she’s up for it.” Simon says. 

John nods.

You wake to Simon sat next to you in your nest. The sun is just starting to set, you slept for longer than you needed. You don’t care though, you feel like you needed it. The good thing is your dreams weren't too horrible. At least you didn't wake up screaming. 

His fingers come down to brush hair behind your ear. 

“Hey, how was your nap?” He asks. 

“Good.” You say. 

“I thought if you’re feeling up to it we could go to the loch?” He asks. You smile sitting up, you always want to go there, you’d live at the loch if you could. He smiles, he knows your reaction is yes enough. 

“Okay, let's get ready. We have something for you.” He says helping you to your feet. 

“What is it?” 

“You’ll see.” He says squeezing your hands. 

…

When you make it to the loch John and Simon come over to you with a bag in their hands. You’re not sure what the surprise is but based on how quiet Johnny has been you’re pretty sure it’s nothing good. 

“Remeber when you came over here and let Piper go?” John asks. You nod. “We thought maybe you would want to do the same-” his hand disappears into the paper bag Simon is holding and he pulls something out. “- with Professor Hale.”

For a second you’re not sure what you’re looking at. It's a pretty box, made of polished wood with gold and silver swirls of metal. You reach out and open it, your nerves fill the air. When you open it the familiar scent of the Professor's cigars fills your nose. 

You feel sick, the smell almost makes you gag. You swallow hard and feel a hand land on your shoulder. 

“His cigars.” You say. You reach out seeing your hand shake and pick one up. You’ve never been able to touch them before. You don’t even want to think about what he might have done if you did touch them. You look up at John, he likes cigars.

“Are they good cigars?” You ask. You don’t really care. You assume they are, the professor was rich. 

“Very good,” he says. 

You hand a cigar to John. He frowns at you.

“The smell.” You say swallowing the nerves. Just looking at it in your hands makes you nervous. “When I was younger I hated it. When he smoked it was always because something good had happened which usually meant something bad for me.” You roll the cigar in your fingers then look up at John. 

“The smell reminds me of him. I want it to remind me of something else. I want to imagine you when I think about cigars. Not him.” You say, your eyes are pleading with him like you expect him to say no. He reaches out and picks it up out of your hand. He holds it more confidently than you do. 

“Are you sure?” He asks, raising an eyebrow. No, you smile and nod at him. This is a good thing. He sighs, reaching into his pocket for something. You turn back to look at Johnny and Kyle, you walk over to them then you all walk down to the edge of the loch. 

Simon hands you the box of cigars and you place it on the edge of the shore. Maybe you should say something. You don’t know what to say, for once he’s quiet in your head too, maybe you are healing. You laugh, your face heats up as you realise how inappropriate it seems. 

“I’m sorry.” You say between giggles. You look around at them, they look confused. Maybe they think you’re crazy. “This is supposed to be sad but I can’t think of a single good thing to say about him.” 

Simon’s hand lands on the small of your back. You look at Johnny who has a smile teasing his lips. 

“Do any of you have anything nice to say?” You ask, wiping your eyes as the laughing dies down.

“I’m glad he’s dead.” Kyle says. It makes you snort laugh again. 

“He’s rotting in Hell for what he did.” Johnny says before spitting on the box. You hear Simon tut and you laugh again. 

“Piper was a good shot.” Johnny says shrugging.

“Mate, it was point blank, she couldn’t have missed.” Kyle says scoffing. 

“I don’t know civ’s can be unpredictable.” Johnny replies, crossing his arms. 

“Who officially shot him?” Kyle asks, turning to see John.

“Simon.” He says with the cigar in his mouth, you hear him click a lighter. Your smile fades as the familiar scent of the Professor's cigars fills your nose. You sigh as goosebumps rise on the back of your neck. Simon rubs your back and you look down at the box. 

“I wish she missed.” You say. There’s silence, no one says a word, no one moves. You hear John suck in a long puff of the cigar. You look up at Kyle. “He should have suffered a little.” John’s hand lands on your shoulder. 

Simon hands you a large gas lighter and you look down at it. It’s symbolic, burning the cigars is symbolic, you’re supposed to be letting him go, this is supposed to help. You twist the stopper and hear the sound of hissing gas. You click the button and a blue flame comes out. 

You step over to the box and hold it down over the cigars. They catch a light quickly and when there is a good fire going you stand back up turning it off. Simon takes it out of your hand. You turn to look at John who has the cigar in his hand. 

You reach out for his hand and he laces his fingers with yours. You squeeze his hand watching him take a long puff of the cigar. The smell makes bile rise in our stomach, it feels wrong looking up expecting to see the Professor but it’s not it’s John and he smiles at you. 

“Tell me your name.” You ask, it comes out a whisper. Barely audible but you need to hear it, you need to hear his voice. He hands his cigar to Simon and rests his hands on the top of your arms, gripping tight enough to keep you grounded. 

“John, my name’s Johnathan Price.” He says keeping eye contact with you. “Johnathan Michael Price.”

“Johnathan Price.” You smile reaching up to hold his face. You feel his beard under his fingers, you run your thumbs across his strong jaw. He’s here and he’s real, your John Price. You reach up and kiss him, long and slow letting his hands run up and down your body. When you break from the kiss he presses his forehead to yours. 

“I love you John.” You say.

“I love you too.” He replies, you smile at him then moves you to his side. You see Johnny and Kyle then Simon comes into your field of view. He hands the cigar to John then slips in next to you. Their arms wrap around your waist as you watch John and Kyle do the same. 

You lean against John looking at the box in the middle of you all being destroyed by the flames. You let out a long breath, Johnny and Kyle look like they're about to start crying or making out with each other.

You smile, this is good. You are healing and your pack is here for you. Professor Hale is gone, the last remnants of his life are burning at your feet. That part of your life is over, now all you have to do is live your life, surrounded by the people you love.

Dividers by Plum98 & gild-ui

[moody-alcoholic]

The These Violent Delight's masterlist just hit 1k notes and to celebrate I thought I would share some information on the prequel and sequel fics I'm working on. I was hoping to get a sims build of the bunker finished too but I’ve been so busy and that will come out when it’s ready.

Instead please enjoy the blurbs and moodboards I have been working on. There is no ETA on when the fics will come out but I will be dedicating my full attention to them after These Violent Delights is finished. 

And finally thank you so much! All the support I have got over this series really does mean the world, this fic has become my passion project and I am so excited to be able to create more for it.

This is my WIP Wednesday post, the next chapter of TVD will be out on Friday.

Enjoy <3

These Violent Beginings

A young Piper Montgomery is a newly qualified medical geneticist who has just finished her masters degree. Frustrated with the current rules and restrictions surrounding the research into curing genetic diseases, she becomes enthralled with Professor Victor Hale and his new life changing formula.

Only as the years pass she watches a man she once inspired turn into a monster searching for a perfection that doesn’t exist. And then there’s you, the young sweet omega he came back with after a 2 year absence. 

Piper always admired Victor Hale and his brilliant mind, but now there’s you and Piper can't help falling in love with the daughter she's always wanted.

Piper Montgomary moodboard CW: needles, medical tools, scalpels.

___

These Violent Ends

‘There is nothing more genetically perfect than a pureblood omega.’ - Extract from Victor Hale’s manifesto. This as well as other works were recovered and stolen by the terrorist organization commonly known as; The Victors.

10 years after the events of These Violent Delights, Piper Montgomary is now a Professor and world famous for the formula that can cure almost everything. But there is a new threat looming.

A terrorist organization known as The Victors is hell bent on exposing the ‘old’ formula to the world. They believe the previous versions of the formula are superior and the natural progression of human evolution. Suddenly Piper and the omega find themselves with targets on their backs. 

Piper is the only person left in the world who can re-create the original formula and her daughter is the only omega left. Luckily they have protection in the form of an SAS taskforce; 141. But as the terrorist attacks increase Piper and the omega are in more and more danger. 

The Omega Moodboard CW: Blood, abuse, bruises, cigars, alcohol, needles.

[moody-alcoholic]

NikPrice Week Day 7

Day 7 - Formals NSFW WC: 1.4k CW: +18 content MDNI. Smut, oral (M receiving), masturbation, uniform kink kinda.. AN: Want more Nikprice? Want better Nikprice?? I'll leave a few people below who actually inspired me to do this week in the firstplace:

on-a-lucky-tide nekrosmos laswells-ashtray

Previous - masterlist

Learn more HERE

Enjoy <3

“I can’t believe you convinced me to do this.” John shouts from the bedroom.

“I think it was nice of them to offer.” Nik responds. 

“I didn’t exactly pack my dress uniform.” He responds, sighing. 

“We don’t have to go.” Nik says walking down to the bedroom. When John came back from 2 days in London they drove to Edinburgh to get his ankle checked at the hospital. It’s healing nicely so he was given a different cast and a walking boot. 

That was how they bumped into an old colleague of John’s who offered them to join him as well as a few other officers for lunch at the end of the week. It’s at an elite men's club and the dress code is full formals. John winched at the offer but he seemingly couldn't refuse. Even Nikolai got invited, now he needs to rent a suit. 

But at least he’s not hobbling around anymore.  He looks at John who’s hands are on his hips looking at laid out uniforms on the bed. 

“I thought you said you didn’t bring anything?” He asks, walking up behind him and wrapping his arms around his waist. 

“It’s the stuff Soap has stored here.” John says, rubbing his chin.

“You could get them to drive your uniform up.” Nik says. John hums, he knows it's a long trip. 

“Might have to.” John says, picking up a belt. Nik squeezes his waist and John turns in his arms. He kisses Nik. 

“Do you look good in dress uniform?” Nikolai asks, teasing him.

“Fuckin’ stunning.”

…

John wasn’t joking, he does look stunning. 

Nikolai has never seen him in full formals but he relished in watching him dress. He watched how meticulous John worked, shining shoes and his buttons. Running a lint roller over the thing several times, he took a long shower about an hour before Simon was due to pick them up.

Not only did he ask Simon to bring his uniform up he practically ordered him to attend the event too. 

‘You know it’s your job to shadow me at every event I'm invited to. You do want to make captain some day don’t you?’ John asked over the phone.

‘No.’ Simon’s voice came back making Nik chuckle. 

‘You’re coming Simon.’ John says in an authoritative tone that even makes Nik stiffen up, there was a sigh down the line. 

‘Only if I get paid.’ Simon says. 

‘Deal.’ John replied enthusiastically. 

“Last time I wore formals was when I got promoted.” John calls from the bedroom, snapping Nik out his head. He looks towards the open door but he can’t see John. A second later he emerges and Nik stands up. 

“Chert voz'mi.” Nik curses under his breath. He really is magnificent. It doesn’t help that the uniform is ever so slightly too tight on him. Nik strides over to him, wrapping his arm around his waist and pulling him close. His cock twitches in his pants as he runs his hands up the rough beige uniform. 

“Christ.” John says getting a breath in between Nik’s needy mouth and tongue. “You’ll mess my hair.”

“I don’t care.” Nik says breaking from the kiss looking at John and his cheeks turning red. “I’ll suck you off right here, right now.” 

John scoffs. 

Nikolai drops to his knees and looks up at John. John’s mouth is tipped open as Nik reaches down to unclip his belt. 

“We’ll be late.” John says breathlessly, but he’s not stopping him. Nik can feel his cock hardening as he pulls John’s pants and boxers down taking his cock in his hand. 

“Lieutenant Riley won’t mind.” Nik says before locking his mouth around John’s tip. His hands come to Nikolai’s hair running his fingers through it. 

“You clearly haven’t spent enough time with Lieutenant Riley.” John chuckles before moaning out and pressing Nik’s head deep on his cock. Nik moans gagging on his cock as John twitches in his mouth hitting the back of his throat. 

“Fuck, Nik.” John moans lets his head go and Nik pulls his head back a little. He smiles as best as he can, he loves John like this. Desperate but happy, enjoying himself and making Nik gag on his cock which he is always happy to do. 

“Didn’t know you had a thing for uniforms.” John says between pants. Nik’s mouth fills with saliva as he takes John deeper and deeper with each thrust. John starts moving his hips in time with Nik too, his breathing picking up and his legs trembling. 

Nik squeezes his thighs and feels John flex under his hands. It makes his own cock throb in his pants. He can feel the wet spot of precum he hopes is just in his boxers. He has to return this suit. He reaches down with one of his hands to unzip his trousers and reaches in to pull his cock out. 

He moans with relief giving himself a few tugs and letting John’s cock slam into the back of his throat. He can’t stop though grinding his hips into his fist a few times while he swirls his tongue around John’s head letting the salty taste of his precum linger on his tongue. 

He wants to tell John how hot he looks, with the colourful badges and the shiny brass buttons. How the perfectly straight trousers and jacket tickles something in the back of his brain. It makes him proud too, proud that the man he loves gets to wear a uniform like this. Something that shows off not only him but his history, his achievements. 

It’s so fucking hot, his cock twitches in his fist a steady stream of precum rolls down his fingers. Then there’s John with his breathy moans and panting, his hand gripping Nik’s hair and forcing him to take his cock all the way. 

“Fuck, Nik. You’re mouths so fuckin’ perfect.” John grunts, Nik hums for him and his cock pulsates. Nik tries to pull his head back but John doesn’t let him, holding his head with two hands as he thrusts his hips, once, twice, then he comes deep down Nik’s throat. 

Fuck he feel’s good, he tastes good Nik could happaly do this for hours. He almost misses his own cock pulse as he comes over John’s perfectly shined boots. John gently pulls Nik’s head off him and bends down to kiss him, he’ll be getting saliva all over his beard. Wait till he finds out about his boots. 

“Bloody hell Nik, you’re-” The words catch in his throat. “Perfect. You’re perfect.” 

Nik smiles and looks down at his boots, John looks too and chuckles. Nik tucks himself back in his pants and reaches into his pocket and pulls out tissue, he uses it to wipe the cum off his boots. John pulls his trousers and boxers back up. When Nik’s done he stands up checking them both to see if they’ve leaked on their clothes. 

John’s fingers pull Nik’s chin up slightly so they’re eye to eye. He kisses him again, this time longer and deeper running his hands up and down his hands. 

“You know I might just have a thing for you in that suit.” John says his cheeks flushed red. 

“Da? It’s a shame it’s rented.” Nik says smiling. John smiles too, he grabs Nik’s hands and squeezes them. 

“I love you Nikolai.” John says, it makes Nik’s heart flutter and his smile grows bigger, he brings one of his hands up to cup John’s face. 

“I love you too.” Nik replies before leaning down to kiss him again. This time they’re interrupted by a car horn. John sighs when he breaks from the kiss squeezing Nik’s hand. 

“You look amazing.” Nik says, John blushes reaching over to pick up his hat. 

“Thank you.” He kisses Nik quickly on the cheek. “C’mon, lets go.” 

“Why did you invite Simon?” Nik asks suddenly, John frowns at him then heads for the door.

“He’s an officer, part of his duties.” John says, Nik hum, he doesn’t quite believe him. 

“And the real reason?” Nik asks. John chuckles stopping at the door and putting his hat on. 

“There’s no way I’m getting through this without a few glasses of whisky. We needed a designated driver-” He opens the door waving at Simon. “-Ghost doesn’t drink.” 

“Ha, you’re funny John.” Nik slaps him on the shoulder. John frowns looking back over at Simon.

“What do you know, Nik?” John asks. 

“I think that's a story Ghost has to tell you.” Nik chuckles, dropping his hand off his shoulder and waiving at Simon before heading out to the car. 

He hears John tutting behind him as he closes the door.

Back to day 1 Banners - guild-ui

[moody-alcoholic]

NikPrice Week Day 6

Day 6 - I missed you SFW WC: 700 CW: Nothing. AN: sorry this one is a little shorter, this was the only prompt I had nothing planned for.

Previous - masterlist - next

Learn more HERE

Enjoy <3

They only get another week before John’s forced to leave. 

“It’s only for a few days.” He reminds Nik as they lay together, their bodies a naked entitlement. 

“It’s a few days too long.” Nik sighs. John hums. 

“I’ll fill the fridge up so you don’t have to go out, that ankle of yours needs to heal. When i’m back it will be time for your check up.” John says. 

“Just be safe John, it’s a long drive to London.” Nik says, John turns in the bed so he’s facing Nik, his hand brushes through the hair on his chest. 

“Three days maximum.” John says, reaching up to kiss him. Nik likes to kiss slowly, taking his time with John’s mouth. He likes to touch too, running his hands up and down John’s body any chance he gets. 

“Three days.” Nik replies, pulling back from the kiss. John nods and smiles.

…

For John it was the drive down to London that was the worst. Each mile he put under his belt hurt. When he did finally get to the base the distraction was more than welcome. 

“How’s Nik, Cap?” Johnny asked, slapping him on the top of his back. 

“Good, thank you again for letting us borrow the cabin.” John says with a smile.

“No problem! It should be doing something other than sitting there empty.” Johnny beams before Simon comes over with his arms full of paperwork. John sighs, fucking buraccuracy, he should have sorted all this before he left. He nods at Simon following him into his office. 

…

It’s late again as John runs his hand down his face. He looks over at the clock on the computer. It’s almost midnight. He should call Nikolai at least and ask how his day was. He picks up his phone and brings it up to his ear as the call rings through. 

“Kaptain.” Nik’s voice comes through. It makes John instantly relax into his chair. 

“Sorry it’s so late.” John says. 

“No, don’t worry about it. I was just thinking about you.” He says, a warmth booms in John’s core at the thought of Nik thinking about him. 

“Oh yeah?” John asks playfully. His mind going back to a few hours ago when he was making out and cuddling up with him. Now he’s alone in his dark temporary office. 

“Da, I miss you.” Nik’s voice comes back with a low soft hum. 

“It’s only been a few hours.” John scoffs, he misses him too. He misses the feel of Nik’s hands on his, the way Nik will take any opportunity to press kisses into his neck. He misses the feel of Nik’s strong legs or arms wrapped around him. The way he smiles at him or looks at him first thing in a morning with sleep still in his eyes. 

“I miss you too.” John smiles. He hears Nik hum down the line, it sounds like he’s still in bed. Christ, he wishes he was there, anywhere but stuck on a base reading pages and pages of reports. They all started to blur together in the end. Why he couldn’t just allow Simon to sign off on them was still bugging him. Fucking burracuracy. 

“Are you in bed?” John asks. 

“Da.” Nik replies sleepy. He should leave him, let him get some rest. Instead he finds himself reaching into his pocket for his earbuds. 

“Put the camera on.” John says moving his phone away from his ear and turning his own on before resting it up against his monitor so it’s facing him. He smiles as he hears Nik rusting and moving on the bed. A second later Nik shows up on the screen, Nik smiles at him and stabilises the phone. He must have it propped up against the light on the bedside table. 

“That's a lot of paperwork.” Nik sighs. 

“You should see the other pile.” John scoffs. Nik yawns relaxing in the bed. He’s shirtless, the low light from the bedside table lights up his features. Christ, he misses him, if he spends a little longer doing these now he could be on the road back by tomorrow afternoon. 

“Are you going to watch me sleep malýsh?” Nik asks with his eyes closed, one of his strong arms is tucked under the pillow, his other hand is resting over his stomach. 

“Yes, that's exactly what I’m going to do.” John says, Nik opens one of his eyes and smiles. 

“You need to rest too.” He says yawning. John smiles watching him relax even more into the bedding. 

“I will don’t worry.” He says lowering his voice. Nik just hums in reply and John picks his pen back up. He gets through a few more paragraphs on the report before he hears the gentle snoring in his ear. He looks back at his phone seeing Nik passed out, his mouth open slightly. 

John smiles watching the man he loves sleep soundly. He wishes he could walk in the next door and find him sleeping softly but for now he can handle this compromise. 

John hums. “Love you, Nik.” He whispers. Nik doesn’t move or react. Good, he needs the rest. John should go to bed to prop the phone up in his  bedroom somehow and pretend he’s sleeping with him. No, he should keep going. The quicker he gets this done the quicker he can get back to him. 

He smiles listening to Nikolai’s snoring as he gets back to his report.

next

Banners - guild-ui

[moody-alcoholic]

Not this having me sobbing at 3am 😭

Angst when I should be sleeping just hits different ❤️

Simon paints

18+

wc: 600

CW: non-explicit smut. Simon accidentally smears you with greasepaint and finds out he's not soulless. yes those things are somehow connected trust the process

Simon says art requires a soul. Ask him if he has one, he’ll tell you no. Ask if he’s sure, he’ll swear it.

Still he comes home from deployment with greasepaint all over his eyes, balaclava off and crumpled in a hand. 

When you go in for a hug, he slumps into you—nuzzling the crook of your neck, shamelessly inhaling your smell like he's addicted to it, kissing wherever his lips land like he's starving.

Black stripes like brushstrokes bleed from his brow to your skin, but you barely notice, and he's too fucking tired and soft to care.

Suddenly, his hands frame your face as he drags your mouth to his, because no amount of fatigue can keep him from getting his fix of you.

It's then that his palms soak up the grease, and he unintentionally paints you with it. 

From your neck to your cheeks, at first. Then a handprint on your stomach, dragged down to the waistband of your sweats. Streaks around your nipples, the ghost of his hand to your breast, painted fingers wrapping at your hips. 

Shadows of him and where he's been, infiltrating the creases of your body. In the wrinkles at the corners of your eyes, where his thumb collected tears as you shattered on his fingers. In the tiny dimples framing your smile, where his hand locked you in place so he could find your lips. Smeared dots on your legs, ribbons in between the silver lines that stretch along your thighs, where he held you steady as you straddled him and finally brought you both to bliss.

You only notice come morning, finding painted comets on your bed sheets. Two bodies reuniting, two souls back home—or only one, like he insists, finding its missing piece.

The gentle curve of his thumb brushing your cheekbone stares back at you in the bathroom mirror. The greedy mark of his lust dances from your chest to your mons, lost in the curls growing above your sex, only to then flare at your hips—just like the first shaft of sun at dawn. A slice growing golden at the horizon.

You touch it with your fingertips and follow the journey his hands took mere hours ago as the memory of it flows gently before your eyes.

As you reach your navel, his reflection appears behind you, a cheeky smile hinted on his lips—greasepaint on them as well, smeared around by the kisses you gave him, and the one he returned in kind. He looks amused and just as surprised, as if he's witnessing something entirely different from what he was expecting. 

Something so, so much better.

Thick arms envelop you from behind. Drawings of your own making mark his chest in greasy black strokes, and now you can feel them transfer to your back. 

"You paint nice," you whisper.

Art, he thinks. His magnum opus, drawn with blind eyes and an open heart. You look disarmingly beautiful with the gentle ghost of his hands on you, and he looks more alive than he's ever been with the memory of your fingertips painted on himself.

And maybe his chest isn't as hollow as he thinks. Maybe he holds crumbs of a soul inside of him. He ventures that he might have a full one too, and he might end up believing it if you keep smiling the way you are now, meeting his gaze in the mirror.

He kisses the curve of your shoulder. The shape of his mouth a signature on the most perfect of canvases.

Two bodies reuniting. Two souls back home.

[moody-alcoholic]

NikPrice Week Day 5

Day 5 - Restraints NSFW WC: 2k CW: +18 content MDNI. Sex, anal sex, handjob, restraints, bondage, dom/sub dynamics, safeword, overuse of the word cock. AN: This prompt chewed me up and spat me out. I deleted half of it this morning and re-wrote it because I just couldn't get into it. Anyway please enjoy whatever this is. XD

Previous - masterlist - next

Learn more HERE

Enjoy <3

It had been another week and things had been going great. Until John got a call. 

“I don’t care lieutenant, just handle it!” John snaps. Pacing the living room as Nik finishes washing the dishes. “This is utter bullshit, Laswell!” 

Nik looks over watching John run his hand over his face. He can’t tell who John is mad at. 

“I’m hundreds of miles away. You have my lieutenant, you have my team, solve this and don’t call again until you have Makarov.” Nik looks back at the sink as John makes a frustrated noise and walks over to sit at the table. 

“What was that about?” Nik asks after a few seconds of silence. He turns to look at John staring at his phone on the table.

“Classified.” John sighs still with anger in his voice. It’s not, he just doesn’t want to talk about it. Nik doesn’t push him, pressing his lips together and hobbling around behind John. 

“You need to relax, John.” Nik says. “You’re not working.” 

“I know. Sorry.” He says pinching the bridge of his nose then rubbing his forehead. Nik starts to rub his shoulders. John relaxes slightly, dropping his shoulders and relaxing back in the chair. 

“I think I know something that might help.” Nik says, John turns in the chair to look up at him. “Something that takes your power away.” 

“Power?” John asks, raising an eyebrow. Nik smiles and leans down to kiss John. He kisses him deep, John becomes needy pressing his hands on Nik’s chest. 

“Do you trust me?” Nik asks. 

“‘Cause I do.” John says, Nik smiles and steps back keeping the majority of the weight on his good leg. 

“Then trust me.” He holds his hand out for John who sighs before accepting it and Nik leads him to the bedroom. Nik guides him over to sit on the bed. John does and looks up at him. 

“Take your clothes off and lay down.” Nik orders. 

“Romantic.” John teases pulling his top off over his head, Nik does the same pulling his shirt off before turning and reaching into a chest in the room, he pulls out a few different ropes and turns to look at John who raises an eyebrow. 

“You need to give up control. Let me take over.” Nik says, John presses his lips together as he thinks about the possibility of giving up control to Nik. He didn’t lie when he said he trusted him, he’s just not used to giving up power. Nikolai takes another step over to him and lets John run his hands over the ropes.

“Do you want to pick a safeword?” Nik asks, John looks up at him, he sees the glint in his eyes. Maybe this will be good for him, giving up control and letting Nik have his way with him. 

He nods. “Red?” 

“Red.” Nik repeats. He smiles and brings his hand up to stroke John’s cheek. “Turn on your side, hands behind your back.” John frowns for a second but follows his instructions. It’s not the most comfortable possession but that's part of the point. Besides, his cock is already twitching in anticipation. Maybe he does need this. 

Turns out even though John can’t see he can feel how confident Nik is with the ropes and knots. He binds his arms together, from the top of his biceps to his wrist. He takes his time and not pulling them too tight but tight enough that John can’t move his elbows or wrists. As long as he leans forward slightly it’s not as uncomfortable as he thought it was going to be. 

“You don’t have to do anything. You deserve a break.” Nik says as he finishes running his hand over the ropes he just tied his hand landing on john’s arse. He squeezes his thumb teasing his hole already. John lets out a long breath. “Thats it John, relax.” 

Nik hooks his arm under John’s legs and helps him bend them a little. Nik then stands up and John hears him take the rest of his clothes off using the bed as support as he pulls his shorts off over his cast.

John waits patiently moving his arms to test his range, he barely has any movement but that's the point. He never would have guessed Nik was so good with ropes. John feels frustrated though, he wants to touch his cock and he can’t. He tries squirming on the bed for some stimulation but it’s hard, he’s in an awkward position. 

Nik reaches over, picking up his cock and rubbing his thumb over the tip. John moans wanting to move his hands to Nik’s cock but he can’t. He groans in frustration. 

“No, no, John. You’re not going to do anything. You’re going to lay there and let me fuck that head of yours quiet.” Nik says, his voice low and filled with authority. John has never heard him like this before and it makes goosebumps rise on his body. 

“You’re going to listen right, John?” 

“Yes.” John breathes letting himself relax and feeling Nik ruins his hand down his body and cups his arse again. He squeezes moving his fingers down to John's hole. He takes in a breath feeling Nik teasing him again. 

“John, are you going to let me fuck this pretty ass of yours?” Nik asks with that same low voice sending shivers up his spine. He nods wiggling his arse closer to the edge of the bed, Nik chuckles moving his hand up to his lower back.

“Stay still, let me help you out.” Nik says his hand leaves John’s cock making him whine in response. John hears the bedside table drawer open and he hears Nick shaking a bottle of lube. John didn’t bring one, he almost wants to kick himself for not bringing one but maybe Nik did. Or maybe Johnny left it behind. 

Whatever the case he hears Nik squirting some of the lube out. Nikolai’s hand runs down John’s tied arms stopping at his wrists and grabbing the knot between them. He pulls his arms a little forcing John to arch his back. 

“Have you ever had someone fuck your ass?” He asks. John shakes his head, his cock throbbing in anticipation, Nik sees it and moves his hand from the rope reaching over to grip his cock. His hand is warm and he pulls his foreskin back and gives him a good few tugs making John moan out. 

“Good boy, I’m going to open you up a little first.” Nik says before using his other hand to press a lubed finger into John's ass. John’s never felt this before but Nik seems to know what he’s doing curling his finger and pressing on a soft spot in John’s ass he never even knew existed.

“Fuck, Nik.” He calls, arching his back again and squirming on the bed. 

“Stay still.” Nik orders and John relends. He tugs on the restraints around his arms, suddenly he understands the ropes. John can barely move, sure he can try and fight them but he’s stuck in this awkward position leaving his arse open for Nik to do whatever he wants to him. 

And he does, he thrusts his finger in and out of John’s arse as he pumps John’s cock with his other hand. John’s body pulses every time Nik takes his time to rub that spot, and each time John rewards him with a moan. 

“I’m going to add another finger.” Nik says. 

“Please.” John begs and he's rewarded with a second finger. The sensation sends a shiver up John’s spine. “Feels good.” The words coming out John's mouth with a breathy moan. 

“Good, I’ll give you my cock next.” Nik promises, pressing his thumb on the underside of John’s cock. 

“You deserve this John. You work so hard.” Nik says, he stops thrusting his fingers leaning over and pressing his lips close to John's ear. “Tell me you deserve it.” 

“I-I deserve this.” John says almost immediately wanting Nik to start his fingers again he preses a quick kiss on John’s cheek before standing back up. 

“Yes, yes you do. You’re a captain.” Nik speeds up his fingers and hand. “You have a team that would die for you.” He makes sure to linger on that soft spot in his arse making his cock twitch in Nik’s hand and John groans.

“Easy John.” Nik says removing his hand from John’s cock and his fingers from his ass. “I want to fuck you.” More lube is squirted and John feels Nik line the head of his cock up with his arse.

“Rememeber the safeword?” Nik asks. 

“Yes.” John says wiggling his hips in a desperate attempt to get Nik to hurry up. Nik rests his free hand on John’s arse to stop him and eases in. There’s nothing going on in John’s brain when he does. The worries about work, the annoyance they still haven’t found Makarov. The stress, it’s all washed away as the air is expelled out his lungs. 

“Nik.” John moans, closing his eyes and enjoying the gentle drags of his cock. One of Nik’s hands grabs the rope between his wrists locking him in place, the other goes back to pumping his cock. John doesn’t have to do anything other than lie here and listen to Nik and his beautiful moans.

“Tell me you deserve this.” Nik asks as John's eyes snap open again. 

“I deserve this.” He repeats. He’s barely thinking, Nik rewards him with speeding up his hand and his thrusts. John pulls on the restraints bending his knees up to his chest a little more. It makes him tighten around Nik’s cock, he moans and it makes John smile. He fucking loves Nik’s moans, he never thought he could sound so pretty, so utterly blissed out. 

It makes John throb in Nik’s hand, precum soaks his hand, it’s all a little too much, he’s not going to last much longer. 

“Nik-Nik.” John pants letting him pull on his restraints even more, it's pulling his arms in an uncomfortable position but he doesn’t care he’s so close. Nik is chasing that peak with him, his thrusts speeding up and becoming erratic. 

“Come with me, John.” Nik says and that's all the permission John needs. His own cock pulsates as thick ropes of cum squirt up his chest and on the bed. A few seconds later Nik stills inside him, his cock throbbing as he fills John’s arse. John swears he nearly comes again just from the feeling but instead he focuses on Nik’s moans and his hand working John through the overstimulation. 

When the moaning and panting turns into them both taking long breaths Nik pulls out of him and gently gets to work untying his arms. He pulls the ropes, muttering praises to John. He kisses him too, over the indents the rope has left, sometimes muttering in Russian. 

“How are you feeling, malýsh?” Nik asks. 

“Good.” John replies, trying to roll on his back. 

“Wait a second.” Nik stops him pressing on his shoulder. “There’s lube everywhere, let me get a towel.” John smiles as he leaves the room, he brings one of his arms into his field of vision and sees the marks left on his skin. He really did need this, he needed his mind not to think of anything.

Nik comes back in the room with a towel gently wiping his lower back and arse, then the bed as best as he can. When he’s done John turns to see him wiping his own body down. John’s gaze lands on his now soft cock that still shines from the lube. 

“How did you learn to tie knots like that?” John asks. 

Nik smiles. “You would be surprised how many knots I need to tie for work.” He reaches down to pick up his boxers. 

“Wait.” John calls holding his hand out to stop him. “Fuck the clothes.” Nik smiles and drops them. John scoots over, getting under the duvet and pulling it back for Nikolai who slips into the bed next to him. Nik gestures for John to lie on his chest. John doesn't complain laying up against Nik resting his head on his chest. 

John wraps his hand over Nik’s stomach as he pulls the duvet over them both. 

“Thank you.” John says relaxing fully against Nikolai. 

“No problem. Kaptain.” Nik says kissing the top of John’s head. “Rest now.” 

next

I know it cuts off kind of quick but just imagine they spent the next few hours cuddling.

Banners - guild-ui

[moody-alcoholic]

Cross My Heart

Chapter 8 - Dirty Work

Summary: poly141 x reader. Enemies to lovers. WC: 3.7k Original abridged version HERE

CW: Death, use of weapons, violence, military inaccuracies.

Previous - masterlist - next AO3

Enjoy <3

When you walk back down with John you can still feel the heat in your cheeks. It feels like every time you walk into a room with any of them it’s more and more awkward. You feel like eyes are digging into you as you walk over to the table in the room and put the laptop down.

“Give me your boots.” Johnny says coming over to you. Before you even question him you’re already taking them off. “I’ll dry them by the radiators.” You nod, Gaz walks up to you as Price opens the laptop and sets it up on a table.

“Can you help her set up a keyword search or something?” Price asks.

“What are you looking for?” Gaz asks, pulling the laptop towards him. You look over at Ghost sticking a cloth into some part of a broken down weapon. 

“Here, type in what you want to search for.” He says turning the laptop back to you. 

“What should I search for?” You ask the room. 

“Try Makarov.” Price asks from the doorway. You type it into the search bar, you have no idea what Gaz has done or how he managed to get it working so quickly. In fact the search part seemed to take the longest. You pull a chair over and sit down clicking through each thing. 

“Just some emails, nothing really. They’re talking about the post being shut down.” 

“Try missiles.” Gaz says you nod typing it in if you try Arabic first and nothing comes up so you switch to Russian. There’s only one document, you open it and there's a list and pictures of missiles, at the end there’s a link. You click it and it opens to a video. 

It’s Makarov, he's talking about something, it looks like he’s in some kind of lab or something. He picks up a vial of something. Everyone but Ghost have moved over to the table now.

“What’s he saying?” Gaz asks. 

“He’s talking about a chemical. Those missiles in the garage they’re-” You stop continuing to listen to him. “Chemical bombs, he's using the missile casings to make chemical weapons.” 

“If those are empty shells outside, where are the insides?” Johnny asks.

“Probably with Al-Qatala.” You say, the video finishes on a freeze frame of Makarov's face. You look up, Ghost has started putting the weapon back together now. 

“What kind of chemicals?” Price asks. You go back to the document turning it so Johnny can see, he scans over it for a few seconds. 

“That's like white phosphorus.” He says pointing at something. “This is some kind of gas.” 

“Like in Urzikstan?” Gaz asks.

“Like Urzikstan?” You ask.

“He had sarin gas. This is different though.” Johnny says you raise an eyebrow looking up at Price who has his arms crossed with a concerned look on his face. 

“What do we do now?” Gaz asks. 

“We send this to Laswell, let her start looking through it. Tomorrow when we follow them to Makarov we’ll know more.” Price says then moves away from the laptop. 

“I can keep looking.” You say moving the laptop back towards you. 

“Laswell’s programs are faster, besides we need to get some rest. It’s going to be a long day tomorrow.” He says. You nod pushing the laptop back to Kyle.

…

Everyone wakes before the sun is up. You slept uncomfortably, not because you had no bed and you were basically sleeping on the hard floor. Because Johnny had the building so hot you woke up in a pool of sweat. At least your clothes are dry though, mostly. 

“Tea?” Johnny asks, passing you a plastic cup. You yawn, taking it from him.

“Carry tea into a warzone with you all the time?” You ask.

“Cause, how would we function without it?” You look over at Gaz sitting next to you, you smile at him. 

“No time for a tea break. They could be here any minute.” Price says. You sip the tea anyway; it's sweet and milky not like the kind you’re used to. You get up going over to where all the gear is drying and pick up your vest. It’s still damp but it’s better than being sodden. 

You walk over to the window where Ghost and Price are standing. 

“When do you think they’ll be here?” You ask, tightening the vest. 

“Anytime now.” Ghost says.

“How are we going to follow them without being spotted?” You ask.

“We’ll take the car they left yesterday, if they do see us we’ll hope they think it’s one of them.” Price says. You don’t know if that will work but you trust him. 

“When we get there what's the plan?” You ask. 

“Haven’t got that far yet.” Price smiles and turns to look back into the room. You raise an eyebrow, Johnny comes up next to you throwing his arm over your shoulders. 

“Hey, wanna cozy up with me in the back of the car when we leave?” He says winking at you, you feel heat rushing to your cheeks. 

“You’re driving.” Price says smiling. Johnny’s arm leaves your shoulder as he starts to complain. You chuckle going back over to the window. 

“C’mon, help me pack. You two keep a lookout.” Price says walking past you. You lean up against the window, looking out at the garages. 

“So. What's with the mask?” You ask looking over at Ghost, he turns slightly and crosses his arms looking at you. He doesn’t answer, you frown at him. 

“I think it’s cute.” You tease. He scoffs going to look back out the window. “Are you shy or something? You don’t seem shy.” 

“I don’t like people knowing what I do.” He says. It’s not really a satisfying answer. 

“What, you don’t want people knowing you're military?” You ask. He just lets out a sigh.  

“I get it.” You say looking back out the window. “You want to keep work and home life separate. Do you have someone at home waiting for you?”

“No.” He says quickly. “Not anymore.” 

You don’t press him any further, it feels like you’ve hit a nerve. You’re not waiting much longer, the sun has only just started to break over the horizon when a truck pulls up to the gate. You all make it outside and climb into the car they hid round the back of the building. 

You all wait in silence hearing the garage doors open and close. Johnny doesn’t turn the engine of the car on until you all hear the distant click of the front gates slamming closed. By that point everyone is getting somewhat restless, you’re sat in the back between Ghost and Gaz. Price is in the front with the laptop on his knees. 

“Laswell thinks they might be heading to an old cold war base a few hours from the border of Kastovia.” Price says. “Satellite images have been promising and Russia has no troops in that region.”

“And they would have no reason to lie.” You say raising an eyebrow. You shrug when Price looks back at you. 

“Let’s move, we don’t want to lose them if we’re wrong.” He says gesturing for Johnny to drive. 

…

Price was right, they end up driving into what looks like an old cold war air base. Grass is peaking through the cracked concrete of the runway. The surrounding fence is rusted and collapsed in some places the buildings look rundown and barely functional but you all watch as one of the doors to one of the hangers open and the trucks drive in. 

Price orders Johnny to drive round to a forest about a kilometre away from the place and you all get out. 

“How can we be sure he’s there?” Gaz asks as he closes the boot of the car. 

“He’s there.” Price says confidently. 

“What about the others, The Butcher and Khaled?” You ask as you follow them through the trees. 

“No, they haven’t been spotted. This is a cold war era building though. Chances are there’s an underground tunnel system they’re hiding in.” Price says.

“That explains why we didn’t see many guards.” Ghost replies. 

“Right, besides I don’t think it’s going to be getting in that's the problem.” Price says. You let out a sigh, this feels too easy. It feels like you’re rushing, he’s in that building but like Price said there could be miles of tunnels hidden underneath. He could have a whole army in there just waiting. 

You follow them in silence listening to them talk strategies. The plan seems to be to go in as quietly as possible, cut the alarms, locate Makarov and take him out. Then confirm where the bombs and chemicals are so the US and Russia can come in and clear them up. 

It was a plan, not one you’re particularly happy with but it’s a plan nonetheless. 

“Gaz, Soap. You get in to see if you can find a maintenance room of some kind. Something we can use to tap into their systems.” He hands them the laptop. Gaz takes it then they start making their way down to the building. 

You’re all hidden behind something you think was once a barn but now there's a tree growing out of it and it's collapsed on one side. Ghost has binoculars looking around the place, the sun is out and the sky is clear which is way better than the thunderstorm from last night. 

“Place is quiet. I don’t like it.” Ghost says after a few seconds. 

“Makes our job easier.” Price says. You straighten up when you see the doors of the hanger open again. 

“Eye’s up Ghost.” 

“I see.” He replies. You squint trying to get a better look, you can’t see anything really from this distance, you wonder if Soap and Gaz are having any better look. 

“Shit. That’s Makarov.” Ghost says handing the binoculars over to Price. He brings them up to his eyes. You see a smile on his lips. 

“Got you now fucker.” You hear him whisper under his breath as he takes the binoculars down and hands them over to Ghost. 

“Update Soap and Gaz. I’ll get Laswell in the loop.” He says before turning to walk away. 

“Soap, Gaz. Makarov is heading into the main building.” 

“Copy.” You hear Gaz call back. “How’s our way in looking?”

“You’re clear. Watch yourselves.” 

“Always.” Soap replies. You turn behind you to see Price talking on a phone. When you turn back you try to look for Soap and Gaz but you can’t see them at all. You watch as Makarov makes it into the building with his entourage. 

“We’re in, making our way to the building now.” Gaz says. 

“Copy, watch your step, we have no intel you’re going in blind.”

“Copy, won’t be blind for long though.” Gaz whispers. You’re holding your breath, your palms have gone sweaty. You’re nervous, you want to be with them, helping them. What if they get hurt? They know what they’re doing, they’ve been trained for this. 

“Is it anonymity or something else?” You ask, Ghost looks at you and you see him frown. “I mean if it was really for anonymity you’d cover your tattoo’s too.” 

“Focus.” He snaps, turning back to look through the binoculars. You chuckle and look black down to the building. 

“Did you always wear it or was it only after you became SAS?” You ask, you can tell he’s not interested in the way he sighs. “And why the skull, why not just a black mask?”  

“Does it matter?” He snaps. 

“I mean you did fuck me I get to see your cock but not your face?” You shrug lowering your voice and making sure Price is still out of earshot 

“You’re missing one reason.” He says, sighing again. You thought he would get riled up. Get his blood pumping before a fight. 

“Whats that?” You ask, now you’re curious. He turns to look at you. 

“Maybe I don’t wear it for me.” He says, you frown tipping your head as he looks back towards the airfield. What the hell does that mean?

“How’re we looking?” Price asks as he comes back standing next to you. You straighten up, gripping your weapon. 

“We’re in, looking for a maintenance room.” Soap whispers as if on cue. 

“Good. Let us know when you have access then we’ll move.” Price says. It feels like you’re waiting forever, the seconds feel like minutes, you find yourself constantly checking your watch. Apart from that you’re trying to figure out what Ghost ment. 

“Nervous?” Price asks. You look over at him and smile. 

“Never.” He smiles back nodding his head.

“We’re in. Looks like Makarov is sitting pretty at the top of the ATC. Can you get a visual Ghost?” You all look up at the tower, you can’t see anything from here. 

“Copy. I see him.” Ghost says after a few seconds.

“We can override the security and lock him in there?” Gaz asks.

“Good, do it. Any signs of tunnels?” Price asks. 

“Nothing, everything seems to be above ground.” Gaz responds, you look over at Price. It feels too easy. 

“How many inside?” 

“A few dozen, 30. Maybe 40.” Soap says.

“Civilians?” 

“Negative.” 

“Stay put, we're coming to you.” Price says tapping Ghost on the shoulder.   

It doesn’t take you long to make it to the part of the wall Soap and Gaz made it though. Ghost and Price are faster than they are. More sure in their movements, they handle their weapons in a way you’ve never seen before, it's second nature to them. You all slip through a side door and walk into a dimly lit corridor. 

“Were in.” Price says. You see Soap stick his head round a corner with his weapon drawn before lowering it. You all walk over to him seeing Gaz kneeled down next to the laptop hooked up to what you assume is some kind of server. 

“Gaz, stay here. Guide us, we’ll clear floor by floor. Make sure Makarov doesn't try anything. He’s not getting away this time.” Price says. Gaz nods and the rest of you make it out the room closing the door behind you. 

“Which way Gaz?” Price asks as you all stand there looking to him for direction. 

“Door to the left will take you through to the main entrance, then right through the double doors will take you into the mess.” Gaz says. “You’re looking at about 15-20 people.” You swallow hard. That’s a lot.

“Are you sure we can take that many people at once?” You ask before you can stop yourself. Soap chuckles and you feel embarrassed. 

“We’ve dealt with worse odds. Besides, we have an advantage.” Price says. You frown, shaking your head at him. 

“They don’t know we’re here.” Price says, clicking the safely off his weapon and turning to the left. 

He was right again. Surprising them was a big advantage. Gaz was good at calling out hazards too. You knew where they were before they could even find you. It felt clinical, maybe you’re used to it now, all the killing. It’s not hard when you’ve done it a few times. 

It’s easy, your basic training comes back in minutes. You keep a formation and move as a team, Price leads and you fall into a rhythm behind Ghost. When the firing starts Price calls out orders every now and they. He’s even started calling you sergeant on accident and it makes something awaken in you. Maybe you could see a future in the military. Especially if it’s with them. 

You don’t think about it, you just shoot, shoot the enemy or they will shoot you. You don’t think about if they have a life outside of this. They’re the enemy, they’re making bombs and chemicals to hurt actual innocent people.  

“Mess and kitchen are clear. You’ve got people coming from the west side of the building.” Gaz says. You all get into position before the first few soldiers make it through the doors and manage to get shots off. You have to duck under a table slipping on something and fall on your ass. 

You hear Soap chuckle coming over to you and grab your arm pulling you up. He leads you over to cover and you crouch next to him. 

“Change your mag, I'll cover you.” He says. You nod, pulling the almost empty one out and pressing a new one in. The firing has stopped by the time you’re ready to fire again. You look over at the pile of bodies in the doorway. The room stinks of blood and gunpowder. 

You don’t think that is something you can ever get used to. 

“Looks like you’re clear.” The last few soldiers are with Makarov. I would hurry if I was you. I had to trigger a security lockdown so they couldn’t leave the ATC tower. He’s trying to override it. I don’t know how long you have.” Gaz explains. 

“Copy, we’re moving.” Price says already jogging out the room. When you make it back outside the building you see people coming out of the hangar towards you. 

“Go we’ll hold them off!” Soap shouts grabbing your arm to stop you. You nod at him and watch as Ghost and Price run off towards the ATC tower. You fire off shots with Soap, some are hitting, your adrenaline is pumping and your hands are sweaty. 

He grabs your arm pulling you to cover behind a roadblock. Now it’s your turn to cover him so he can reload. You look over the block and fire off shots trying your best to make them land. You can’t tell if you’re getting better or not. The last one falls as Soap gets back up. 

“C’mon let's catch up with the others. You watch our six, yeah?” You nod and follow him to the tower. Ghost and Price are already out of sight. The lift has been affected by the lockdown so you’re left with the only other option being the stairs. 

You hear an explosion, the building shakes. You both freeze for a second, your eyes meeting before you’re sprinting up the stairs. It takes the wind out of you sprinting up the steps trying to keep up with Soap. By the time you make it to the top you have to brace your hands on your knees and take in lungfuls of air. 

When you look back up Soap has gone, the doors to the control room are open. You walk in hearing voices. 

“You think you can stop us all, Captain?” That has to be Makarov, his thick Russian accent cutting through the air. 

“Maybe not. But we’re going to give it a damn good try.” You hear Price say as a shot is fired. You make it round the control panel just in time to see his body flop to the ground. 

“Gaz, target down. Where’s the control room in this place?” Price asks as he turns, your eyes meet. There’s something different in them now, you quickly look back down at the body. His eyes look dark, focused. This was personal, you swallow hard, your throat feeling suddenly dry. 

“Main building second floor.” Gaz says. You’re already turning to move back down the stairs before them. You feel a shiver up your spine. They got Makarov, they’ve got the weapons, now all they need to do is get the Americans and Russians in here to clear the place out. 

It felt weird, like something had changed between you all. Well something had changed, they’ve completed their mission. You feel a shiver run up your spine remembering the cold look in Price’s eyes. 

It’s not even over yet Jamal and Khaled, they're both still out there, they’re both probably involved in continuing Makarov's work. He was right, they can’t stop them all.

You make it to the control room first Gaz is leaned over a laptop. The room looks out of place almost like they just slammed a concrete box down in the middle of the building, maybe they did. You had to walk through a double set of metal sliding doors to get in. 

“Where are the others?” he asks looking over your shoulder, you turn to see no one following you.

“They must have got turned around.” You say. 

“I’ll go get them, stay here.” he says. You nod, swinging the weapon off your shoulder and putting it on one of the tables. You hear them before you see them, they must have not been that far behind. You walk over to the door to meet up with them. It slides shut and you step back for a second then step up again. Nothing changes, you frown looking up at the sensor waking your hand. 

You sigh, maybe it can only be opened from the other side, you can see them walk into the little room you can only describe as an airlock. This building really is as old as the cold war. When they make it to the door it doesn’t budge. 

They look at you confused. 

“I don’t know.” You say reaching over to press the red emergency open button, it doesn’t do anything. Suddenly you hear a hiss and a clank, they all turn watching the door behind them slide closed and lock. 

An alarm rings out. They look at Gaz who looks down at the laptop, you can see him furiously clicking on the keyboard.  

“The whole system’s gone into lockdown.” He says, you see panic on his face. Fuck. Price looks back at you. 

“Did you touch anything?” He asks. 

“No of course not!” You shout back defensively. Suddenly there’s another hissing, this wasn't like the one in their room. This one sounds different. You look up trying to place it. 

“What’s happening?” Price asks. You look round, it’s the vents, a few seconds later a thick smoke starts to seep out of them. It almost immediately makes you gag and cough. You bring your arm hand up to block your nose and mouth. 

You look back at Price, now you can see panic on his face. 

Fuck.

next

Banners by plum98