#she is so scared of them but the way she trusts me... it makes me CRYYYYYYYYYY
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gothicfied · 2 days ago
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Cho Hyun-ju / Player 120 Headcanons
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Pairing: Cho Hyun-ju / Player 120 x Reader
Warnings: Mentions of death/dying, killing, guns/gunshots (typical squid game stuff), other than that it's just fluff, not proof read (english isn't my first language)
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જ⁀➴ Watching Hyun-ju during the six-legged pentathlon, you couldn't help but be amazed. She was a leader, a fighter, someone who didn't and wouldn't give up, that much was sure. It was amazing to see her lead her group to victory, to safety, being the one to push them and encourage them. Everyone cheered, obviously including you, and it truly was an amazing feeling to see them all get away with their lives. You weren't so sure if you'd make it, too.
જ⁀➴ Thankfully, you did. Your group barely scraped by and you just decided that you needed to be on Hyun-ju's team. Hesitantly, you approached Geum-ja, who immediately noticed your small figure and agreed in a heart beat to let you join their little group.
"You were great back there, you know?" You told Hyun-ju with a shy smile while she was sitting on the stairs, originally just observing Yong-sik getting scolded by his mother again. "Hm? Ah.. that was nothing." she replied back, shaking her head when smiling up at you. "I think everyone in here should be like you," you chuckled, "like, actually. We'd all benefit from it."
જ⁀➴ Hyun-ju's heart melted at all the nice words you would say to her, complimenting her braveness and strength. It made her feel more validated in her actions, which was the motivation she really needed in a place like this. Young-mi was equally excited to have you in their group now, having animated conversations with you about the things you had in common — And if she approved of you, Hyun-ju would, too.
જ⁀➴ Whenever you were scared, were having doubts about yourself or just needed someone to talk, Hyun-ju was there. It was almost like she felt it when you felt that way and she'd always listen to you and comfort you. Her hugs were warm and firm, perfectly calming you down after a particularly bad nightmare. In return, you also encouraged her to talk to you if she ever felt the need to, but everytime you suggested that she'd laugh it off. To Hyun-ju, it was enough to know that she brought you comfort, she didn't need anything in return. She did think it was adorable for you to say that.
જ⁀➴ To distract you from all the stress sometimes, she'd ask you about your plans for the future, about your hobbies and jusy about the things that made you, you. Hyun-ju was genuinely interested in getting to know you and was growing very fond of you over a short period of time.
જ⁀➴ After suffering through the third game together, and also a painful loss (rip Young-mi, my queen), everyone was going through it. Instead of everyone keeping it peaceful, they just decided to slaughter each other after lights out. Ever since losing Young-mi, Hyun-ju was very adamant on keeping you by her side at all times. She wouldn't make that mistake again and leave someone she cared about out of her sight.
The lights flicker like crazy above you, screams and the disgusting sound of people getting killed right next to you were the only things you could focus on right now. You were panicking, you were scared, you felt like you were going to cry and throw up. Hyun-ju had grabbed you by your hand and dragged you to the last corner of the dorm area, hiding you between some mattresses other players had set up. She was firmly holding you by your shoulders and telling you something you couldn't make up. Probably that everything will be okay or something. "Hey! Hey, please listen to me," Hyun-ju leaned in close, hugging you against her, "it's all going to be fine. We'll be okay."
જ⁀➴ In fact, you were. Obviously you were. Hyun-ju wouldn't say something she didn't mean — she wouldn't lie to you. She knew that winning someones trust was hard and the fact that you put so much of it into her filled her with pride.
જ⁀➴ Gi-hun had his mind set on a revolution. Anybody who could handle a firearm was supposed to step forward and take one of of the ones they took off the dead guards. You swallowed, locking eyes with Hyun-ju. She'd step forward, they needed her. You gave her a quick nod and a faint smile and she returned it, quickly stepping forward to help the others.
Geum-ja put a hand on your shoulder, claiming that she'll be fine and that she's far too tough to die out there. "They'll be back to get us out of here, don't worry about it." she said, tugging you by your sleeve, beckoning you to come with her.
When Dae-ho stormed in after a while again, hastily collecting the magazines out of the guards pockets, you were relieved, even if he seemed extremely beside himself. He had some sort of panic attack, so you sat him down on one of the beds, trying to reason with him, until Hyun-ju stormed in, making your facs light up. Oh my god, she's alive. She basically ran to Dae-ho, urging for the ammunition and kept asking him what happened.. so, this wasn't going according to plan at all. You assumption was confirmed by all the masked guards that flooded into the dorm area, holding the remaining players at gunpoint.
"Hyun-ju..?" your voice was shaky. Her eyes fell down on you, taking your hand into hers. "It's all going to be fine."
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stinkysam · 2 days ago
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Choi Subong “Thanos” - No winner.
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Warning : drug and blood mention, talking about dying, stress
Genre : fluff / angst
Synopsis : You get anxious after the mingle game and Thanos tries to comfort you in his own way.
Reader : male (you/yours)
A/N : bold is in English. // I said (to y’all in my head) I wouldn’t write for squid game or Thanos but this fic came to me as I tried to sleep. Not as great as how I imagined it but it’s because I had to wait a day to write it. Don’t expect more fics for this fandom, this was an exception.
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You knew Subong since you were kids, before you even got to school and even before his interest in rap. But despite this, you always had an on and off friendship over the years. Constantly arguing and separating only to come back to one another after some time.
His extravagant personality could often clash with your introverted one, and things got even more unstable between you two when he started his rap career and it got only worse with drugs.
He never asked you for money though, even after he lost everything, knowing you too had money troubles.
You didn’t expect to see him here, you knew he had lost all his money because of that YouTuber, but you didn’t think that man would’ve gone after your friend. You felt a bit relieved to see someone you knew, though the last time you saw him, you two had a fight. It was your fault. You said, a bit too tactless, that ‘it was stupid in the first place to listen to some random guy on the internet and trust him with all your money.’
He had only appeared for a few seconds on the giant screen, putting his vape in his mouth, before it showed someone else. You looked around you, trying to make yourself a path to find him amongst the hundreds of people in the room. You spotted his purple hair and called him, as he turned around and saw you, his eyes widened.
“My man !” He exclaimed, raising his hands in the air, walking toward you. “What are you doing here ?!” He asked, grabbing you by the shoulders, shaking you and then hugging you.
You weren’t really surprised, you’d often argue and leave mad only to see each other the next day and act as if nothing happened.
Since then, two days had passed, and by the third you were at your limit. The mingle game was over, Namgyu and some other player walked out of their room while you and Thanos walked out of yours.
“Welcome back, my friends.” Thanos said loudly, and Namgyu followed with a “Skrrt.” as he joined you two.
You sighed as you looked at all the blood splattered on the floor, you noticed a few players slipping on the puddles, making you sick to the stomach.
You all walked back to the lobby as they announced the imminence of the next vote.
While you waited, Thanos was sitting next to you, talking animatedly with Namgyu who acted just as energetic as him, you could tell the pills they had both taken were still doing their magic and the more you heard them talk about what the next games could be, the more you zoned out, spiraling.
There were three games left, and so many people were alive. Sure, a lot of them would die, but it won't be enough, right ? They surely won’t let a large group of people out of this place, so the games will probably be deadlier, and you know you won’t survive three more games.
You were the only one on the side of the room who had voted X, it was on your chest since the first vote. You looked at Minsu who eyed player 380, you knew he wanted to vote X like you, but he seemed too scared of Namgyu and Thanos to do so. Minsu seemed to look up to her, maybe he she voted X he would too ? But how could you make her vote X ?
So many people have voted O and all of them were dead set to keep on voting the same thing.
You felt even more trapped than you already were. Your heartbeat was increasing as you frantically tried to find a way out of here, to win, to escape somehow, looking around at whoever. Would he vote X ? And her ? And them ? No, maybe him ?
Namgyu saw you looking everywhere and gestured to Thanos who placed a hand on the back of your neck, stopping your thoughts.
“What’s going on my brother ?” He asked loudly, voice devoid of any stress or worry.
All eyes slowly turned to you. You looked at Thanos, the blue O on his chest. He never got mad at you for voting X, knowing you wouldn’t change your mind, you were as stubborn as him.
‘We’re all gonna die’. You wanted to say, but nothing came out. Instead your breathing got louder as everyone’s focus remained on you. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. You’re never gonna get out of here alive.
“Bro ?” Thanos called, his other hand going to your cheeks, squeezing them in hope for a reaction. “You there ?” He leaned closer, his eyes scanning yours but instead of giving him a reaction you just stood up and left, walking and climbing to your bed before hiding under the thin blanket.
Thanos looked at the others, they were as surprised as him but said nothing, they had already caught on what was going on.
“The fuck ?”
After a few minutes you heard someone approaching, climbing on your bed and laying next to you. You already knew who it was ; Thanos.
“What’s wrong, man ?” He asked, shaking you slightly. “Sleeping your anxiety away ? You’re still doing that ?” He laughed, remembering the time you admitted why you took so many naps.
You don’t respond.
“Come on, what’s going on ?" He nudged you again and with the lack of response he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you closer just to annoy you, he knew you wanted space, but he wasn’t going to give it to you.
“What’s bothering you ?” He held you tightly as you shifted, trying to pull away.
Finally, you gave up and poked your head out from the sheet, looking at him with a glare.
“Subong, we’re gonna die.”
He raised an eyebrow.
“Woah, full government name.” He chuckled.
“It’s not, and I’m serious. It’s logical, so many people are still here, 001 kicked your ass in a second and he’s still alive with his group, with two marines, we can’t all survive, why would they allow that, only a handful if not just one is gonna survive and it’s not gonna be-”
“I’ll protect you. Don’t worry.” He said with a smile, confident in himself as he patted your head.
“You really think you can win.”
“It’s the rules, if we survive, we’re free. And debt free.”
“What if the rules say we have to make teams of two ?”
“I’ll help you win. I went with you in the mingle game, remember ?”
“But then we have to play against one another and the loser of the two dies.”
He stared at you before smiling and replying.
“Well, I guess you die.” He wiggled his eyebrows and booped your nose with his finger.
You rolled your eyes, unamused and turned away.
“I told you, I’ll protect you.” He added, snuggling closer to you. “We’ll survive, you’ll see.” He closed his eyes, relaxing with a smile.
“Can you let go of me ?”
“No.”
You rolled your eyes, moving your foot to kick him, only for him to kick you back.
“Shhh, accept the affection of the great legend Thanos.”
“Yucks.” You replied with a chuckle.
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rhaeheartzsquirrelz · 2 days ago
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moms best friend sevika x masc reader?
I know I took so much time writing this but I just wanted it to be perfect! Also, I know it’s short and I’m SOOOO sorry. I’ve been soooooo flipping busy :(
Masc4Masc
Sevika x Masc Female Reader
( Head cannons + Fluff and Slight Smut)
Cw: Mentions of sex (though not in detail).
MEN DO NOT INTERACT OR I WILL BE BLOCKING!
Proofread (finally) || Note: I hate it when those fuckers int w my page. like NO, men do NOT follow me. istg. i’ve blocked like 8 of them already.
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Your mom was one of those people who talked to everyone. Who was friendly with everyone. And, she just happened to be close to Sevika. They were practically best friends, inseparable, two peas in a pod.
Your mom invited Sevika to every small gathering. Be it a family dinner, or even a family gathering, the tall woman would be there. And that’s what sparked her attraction for you.
One thing she didn’t expect, ever in her life, was to be into to someone half her age. You. Who she’d been eyeing ever since she’d first seen you.
It wasn’t only your face that had her utterly mesmerized, it was the way you carried confidence with you everywhere you went. The way you talked, smiled even. Her curiosity about your sense of style was skyrocketed when you’d worn one of your more.. masculine outfits at home. The woman would be lying if she said she didn’t find it hot.
Sevika had a staring problem. At first, you found it a bit.. intimidating. The way she’d narrow her eyes and smirk at your responses to your mother. The way she stood tall and assertive, it was a bit scary. But slowly, as the two of you bonded, she was actually just a like any other woman. You’d even found out, it was more of a hunch, that she was a lesbian.
Sevika was into a lot of things you were. Music. The thing the two of you most bonded over. Everytime Sevika was invited, you’d always come downstairs from your room and show her a new album your mom had bought you. She even gifted you one on Christmas, one that was expensive.
Something that made her sure you were just as into her as she was you was the way you looked at her. The way your eyes would stare into hers whenever she opened her mouth to talk. The way your eyes would travel down to her lips whenever you looked her way. And even the way your lashes lightly fluttered whenever she placed a hand on your shoulder. She was sure you were into her.
As easy as it would’ve been to make you hers, your mother was sure to freak out— to disapprove.
Sevika took her time. She waited. There was tension, intimacy, between the two of you, and you both knew that.
But, one thing that caught her off guard was the fact that you made the first move.
Your mom was on an anniversary dinner, and it just so happened that she told Sevika to “babysit” you. Bad idea.
It started off simple. Sitting next to her on the couch, thights brushing, and shoulders touching. It escalated to somthing much more complicated. You kissed her, let her know her assumptions were correct— that you wanted her.
And, of course, Sevika kisses you back with just as much passion as you.
Your relationship with her was a secret. And it was gradual. Sevika wouldn’t be scared to give you a few looks from across the room, and neither would you be. Your mom didn’t suspect a thing, not when she’d gently pat your back or lightly nudge you. What was so wrong about that?
You’d even make excuses just to see the woman. It went from doing your mom’s errands and dropping things off at her place to being able to go there for no reason at all.
Your mom trusted her, and when she was out of the house, you’d drive to Sevika’s place and crash there. Either relaxing or eating her out, enjoyed your visits— she did aswell.
As much as she tried to keep her “tough and rough” act, whenever you’d kiss her she’d completely melt. Ever so slightly, you could feel her hips squirm and her breath heavy, it was like she was begging for it. Maybe she was?
Top or bottom? How ‘bout both! Receiving and giving, Sevika was a switch. From stuffing your face into her dark cunt, whimpering your pretty little name, to strapping you down and making you beg for mercy. You enjoyed both sides of her.
There was a sense of thrill in your heart whenever the two of you were together. It was the fact that one wrong move could get you in trouble. It was risky, but so much more worth it.
And don’t forget to thank to your mother, you’d found the right woman to take care and love you because of her.
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kiryoutann · 3 days ago
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i wanted to rant about simon.
what do you think so far like what are your actual headcanons for the canon simon vs this simon from this series?
my feelings about the actual simon is quite vague. i've read far more fanfictions than bothering with the actual material so my picture of his is not really...constant? idk
but with this simon, he scares me. just to think about people that can engage in such romantic and sensual acts with little to no feeling involved.
or the mc's father. her dad makes me feel such an anger and injustice that i don't know how to express it and i know we probably won't get a satisfying update on him.
you don't like your wife fine i could understand the distance between them, but how can somebody forget their child no matter if they share the same blood or not, after all the time he raised her
leaving all that behind just to start a whole new life. how can that not eat somebody alive
OHH this is actually a good question. honestly for me, simon is probably one of the hardest character to write about because he doesn't give away too much. too calm. too know-it-all.
we're just gonna talk about the romance aspects!
but based on my head-canon of the canon simon, he has those younger years where he avoids romance, but not this actively and aggressively. it's more because he has too much on his plate (anger management issues, PTSD, depression) than because he think he's not good enough for some happiness (but he also doesn't expect/hope for it.)
canon younger (probably 6-7 years after he killed Roba) Simon lives his life without the need for things to turn out in certain ways. as he gets older (yes, the 2022/2023 ghost) and better mentally, he's become a little more open to the idea, though.
he's still not actively seeking romance, settling on one-nightstands and things that don't require any strings attached. however, he's not completely closed off to the idea too. if he has someone he likes AND TRUST (this is already a high wall to get over), he might act on it. but again, not really actively pursuing it and knows he doesn't need it.
and this might come as a surprise, but he's actually the biggest flirt out there—well, at least when it's only the two of you. when in front of his taskforce, he goes back to acting like he's the calm, collected, cool, stoic, scary lieutenant that everyone knows. can't have you ruin his reputation, right?
"it's private but not secret," with him. though it's not loud PDA, sometimes he lets his hands linger in places like your waist, your hips, shoulders. his love language is act of service, gift giving, physical touch—he makes sure to always appreciate you with compliments and love affirmations, but he's never really a man who's big on words.
WHILE THIS SIMON, hmmm.. he's a bit more complicated. and a mess. at some point, you can think of him as the younger version of canon simon we just talked about to simplify it, but even that's not really accurate considering the different ways they handle "all that sappy stuff" (as simon would say). this one actively and AGGRESIVELY avoids romance.
and while they both (my ver. of canon simon and this simon) sort to flings and one-nightstands, the canon simon is more careful and actually follows the boundaries he draws himself. while this simon outlines the boundaries, follows his rules until an interesting bird enters his orbit, violates them, and destroys them himself before he goes around saying "you read that wrong, darling."
NOW, ABOUT THE FATHER. . .
RIGHT! in my opinion, it's better for them to get a divorce actually and Dad still plays a role in MC's life rather than just leaving her. like, i know it'll still hurt the MC but, at least she can still have both of her parents even though in different houses! at least she doesn't have to feel neglected in her childhood.
okay, you hate someone you thought you would love forever, but abandoning your child? whose very existence was created because of you? talk about the Dad will come up in the sequel. hell, he'll even make an appearance with his two ballet loving new daughters. imagine how MC will feel.
sadly, this happens a lot in real life. fathers leaving and starting a new life without thinking about his "old" family. how people shame single mothers but never the absent fathers. people shame many women who have "daddy issues" or call them "fatherless" yet never call out men's incapability of being a real, PRESENT father.
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lolitastories · 2 days ago
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Ocean blue
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Rafe Cameron
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As I stood one step behind Rafe and our daughter, I felt like their bodyguard. He always wanted to have her in his arms. He didn’t feel the need to use her stroller, so it always stayed in the trunk. He would look back every so often to make sure I was close by but most importantly, he made sure to catch every moment, expression, or action from our daughter. “Don’t get her too close to the glass” I warned. But just as I said it he squatted down with her close enough to touch the glass. He grins back at me before turning to see our daughter so fazed with the creature in front of her. I step back taking a seat on the wooden bench and just watch those two.
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“Can you imagine them living amongst dinosaurs?” My head snaps to my right as a man takes the seat beside me. “Of course they developed over the years but it's incredible to think of how far back they go.”
“And now you have them here” I plainly point towards the glass. “Living behind a glass where people pay to come and see them.” The guy laughs shaking his head.
“If you think they deserve better, why come see them?”
“Call me a hypocrite,” I smile. “I like to think these places are made up of animals we have helped. Maybe that small turtle was saved and would never be able survive out there in the wild.”
“A nice way to see things,” He lets out a sigh. “But still pessimistic?”
“Oh yes” I laugh. “It’s second nature to me. People can be so deceiving that it's easier to never truly put your trust on someone.”
“Talking from experience?” I turn my head to look at him. My smile turned into a bit of a frown. His mood shifted really quickly, noticing my change. “You seem like a person who believes in second chances?”
“I believe things can be made right, but I also believe a person should know their value. Trust should be sacred. If you decide to trust someone it could either make you noble or a fool for falling for the same trick twice.”
“And you don’t want to make that mistake twice because you’re scared of the pain?” I shake my head letting out a quick laugh. “In my books it doesn’t make you a fool to trust again, it simply means you are a human with a big heart.”
“Guess we just differ in opinions.” He smiles nodding along.
“We should meet up to see if that is true, maybe in a couple of years it will be the same?” I look over feeling my smile die down. I take a deep breath ready to respond when someone cuts me off.
“I think not.” Our heads turn to see Rafe standing there. “Our daughter wants to visit the shop.” His eyes rolled over to mine. Dead expression on his face.
“I don’t mean to cause any trouble-”
“Then walk away.” I gasp at Rafe's response. I was about to grab his hand and pull him away when he turned towards me and handed over our daughter. As I adjusted her in my arms I am faced with his back.
“I-” I see the man stretch to the side with pleading eyes to look at me but of course Rafe blocks him. He moves forward with each hand grabbing a fist full of the man's collar.
“Look dude. I am trying to have a nice day with my family and you are ruining it. You are some creepy guy who comes to places like these alone to what? Pry on women hoping they give you some attention?”
“Rafe stop.” I demanded placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Look man I just saw her sitting there and she looked a bit down,” What? I looked down? People said I have a resting bitch face but I didn’t know it made me look depressed, what the fuck.
“Your mistake.” Rafe continues. “Now that I am here you can move along and bother someone else, this one is mine.” He lets him go with a little shove. I stay quiet knowing and hoping it won’t escalate. The man fixes his shirt and with a last glance towards me he walks away.
“Seriously?” I say watching Rafe walk to where I was standing. “You didn’t have to do all of that.” He doesn’t respond. He simply takes a hold of my hand and begins to drag me somewhere. “Rafe,” I say a little louder trying to get his attention. He swiftly dragged us between the crowd until we stopped in front of the family bathroom.
“In.” He opened the door and motioned for me to get in but I just stood there. I raised one brow thinking how crazy he was acting and childish. “Can you please get in?” I rolled my eyes and got in. I shake away the small grin knowing it wasn’t the time to acknowledge his cute plea. I wait for him to close the door and lock it. “I heard you two talking.”
“Rafe you know I wouldn’t-”
“I wasn’t talking about him.” He stays put in the doorway. I search his eyes for any clue, until it hits me. “Are you ever going to trust me?” His voice was almost a whisper. “You don’t say it but I know the reason for you breaking up with me and putting me on trial to be in our daughter's life was because of my past.” I was left speechless. My cheeks were burning and my bones were aching to just touch him. I saw how pain flashed in his eyes but I couldn’t find the words. “You would have hated who I was back then and who’s to say I won’t go back to being that person again. My father was a bad man but I loved him.” His last word made his voice crack. “I don’t want her to live through that and hate me,” His head falls down but I notice a small tear rolling down his cheek. “I don’t want to live knowing you always have a foot out the door.” That's when he broke down into a cry.
“Rafe,” I swallowed the pain in my throat and walked over to him. I grabbed his hand and led him to the single couch in the room. “Look at me Rafe.” I kneel in front of him. I lifted his chin a bit to search for his eyes. Once I saw his eyes focus on me I moved our daughter to his lap. “I can’t tell you that it didn’t play a part in my decision because it did.” His chest was breathing heavily. “But it didn’t make me stop trusting you, ever.” Both of my hands were holding his cheeks making sure he didn’t look away. I move my thumbs to clear up the remainder of his tears. “Baby I fell in love with the man you became after so much pain. You did that on your own before we met and after seeing you become a father, I know you won’t ever do anything to make her and I hate you.”
“But you don’t even look at me the same.” I grinned hearing his childlike whine. I move closer between his legs.
“I don’t look at you the same because you keep changing on me for the better.” I begin to smile bigger. “I fell in love with a 20 year old boy who was building a life for himself. Then again as a 24 year old man who became the father to our little girl. Now I have a chance to see what kind of person you will become as we grow older together but trust me, the only change you see in my eyes is how my love just keeps getting bigger and bigger for you.” I lift my head giving him a quick kiss. “Those blue eyes have become my favorite blues to see.”
“Not the ocean?” He says quietly.
“No, ocean blue doesn’t even come close.” He nods softly before fixing his down posture. “Are you okay?” He flickered his eyes down towards me as he nodded. But when I tried to get up with one hand he kept me from standing up. He leans forward and as I try to pull away but his free hand moves from my shoulder to the back of my head.
“You need to be more careful when talking to strangers,” What am I, 10?. “I held back because our daughter was nearby, but don’t go making friends with strangers, especially men.” I roll my eyes as I let out a chuckle. “You two are mine to protect.” I move forward resting my forehead against his.
“She is ours to protect,” I say challengingly. His piercing eyes don’t change showing how he was not amused with my answer. “I won’t do it again.” I groaned, pulling away from him. “Can I get up now? My knees are killing me”
“I don’t know why. You have always been good on your knees.” I scoff pushing him away.
“You're an idiot.” I hear him laugh as I pick myself up. “Now let's go because there is an otter plushie that has my name on it.” I hear the couch creek as he stands and walks over to the door. I turn around to face Rafe, one hand on the handle behind my back as he stares down at me. “I love you so much.” I whisper quietly and slowly. His eyes move to my right and then the left a couple of times. “Don’t forget it.” I simply state. I turn and push the door open but his hand grips mine and pulls it close. His face right beside me ear,
“Woman if I didn’t have my daughter in my arms right now I would fuck you against this very door. Don’t go saying things like that when I can’t do anything about it.” He takes a step back allowing me to focus back on opening the door. I tried to swallow but my mouth was left dry. Of course Rafe was enjoying it. He wrapped his free arm around my neck and led us to the shop with a grin on his face.
“Fuck the store” I stop in my tracks. Shivers were literally circulating around my body.
“What?” Is he stupid?
“We can come tomorrow to get her a stuffed animal. Let's go home. She needs to nap.” I didn’t care how desperate I looked or sounded. I needed Rafe. These people should be grateful I have enough self restraint to hold myself back but it wouldn’t be for long.
“What about the otter-?”
“Fuck the otter Rafe.” I looked around a little embarrassed as I spoke a little too loudly. I walked closer making sure no one was going to hear me. “I am giving you a chance to go home and fuck me Rafe.” His eyes widened. “You can fuck me until you put another baby in me. I need you,” I look up with pleading eyes hoping to get him on the same page.
“Yes ma’am.” And with Rafe, it didn’t take much.
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Omfg your writing is so cute !! I already requested a couple times before but I just can’t help it
Sonic x reader that admires Shadow, But Sonic misunderstands this as reader having a crush on Shadow when reader just sees Shadow as a mysterious, cool role model, so this causes Sonic to try and compete and up throw Shadow in order to gain readers affection. Only for reader to confess to Sonic and him being confused like “i thought you liked Shadow???” And reader explains that they just admire him and look up to Shadow, but Sonics the one they actually like!
Sorry if this is hard to understand but take your time!
🐛
“The Wrong Idea”
Pairing(s): Jealous Sonic the Hedgehog x Reader, background Knuxadow/Shadknux (Knuckles x Shadow)
Requested: Yes (by an anon).
Description: Sonic the Hedgehog never got jealous! At least…that’s what he tells everybody. So why was it always that faker that made him feel this way?
Notes: Wooooo, request number seven (eight?- technically the eighth one I’m posting-)! And don’t feel bad for requesting multiple! I’m having fun writing these!
(Reader will be gender neutral.)
(Not proof-read/beta-read.)
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Sonic the Hedgehog never got jealous.
At least…that’s what he told everyone.
But right now, it seems like he wasn’t telling the truth.
He has no clue why, but every time he sees you chumming up with that faker, he gets jealous.
He knows it’s selfish, but he wants your eyes on him, not Shadow of all mobians.
Right now, you and Shadow were outside of Rose’s Bakery, Amy’s bakery that she set up with the help of Vanilla and Cream, eating sweets and drinking bubble tea.
Shadow had some kind of coffee-flavored one with tapioca bubbles (because of course he did), while you had a simple fruit tea with your favorite fruit-flavored bubbles.
…Not that he remembered your exact order each time you go to Rose’s…
Oh, who was he kidding. He had a massive crush on you but he was 90% sure you had a crush on the faker.
So all he had to do was one-up him, right?
Sonic zoomed off, paying for a bouquet of your favorite flowers, before zooming back over to where you and Shadow were, only to find you both gone.
His ears droop in disappointment, the flowers drooping as well in a sad yet funny irony.
“(That’s okay, that’s okay. You’ve just gotta catch ‘em next time!)” Sonic thinks to himself. “(It won’t be that hard! You’re the fastest thing alive after all!)”
The next time he sees you both, you’re on your way over to a movie theater, chatting on the way there.
Bingo!
“Hey [Name]! Shads! Good to see you guys!” Sonic says, zooming over to you both.
“Oh! Hey Sonic!” You say, waving at him with a warm smile on your face, one he always cherished.
“Sonic,” Shadow acknowledges. “What are you doing here?”
“Well sheesh, can’t a guy say hi to his friends without the suspicion??” Sonic asks. “Anyway! What are you guys up to?”
“[Name] offered to take me to see a movie in theaters, to have the “full Mobius experience,”” Shadow states, doing air quotes with his hands.
“Oh, sweet! Mind if I tag along?” Sonic asks.
“You sitting still in a theater for hours? Doubtful,” Shadow states.
“I can too sit still in a theater,” Sonic grumbles.
“Sure thing! Though, we are going to see a horror movie, just warning you in advance,” you tell Sonic.
He makes a “Pshhh!” sound, waving you off.
“Puh-lease! Horror is my middle name!” Sonic states.
“I thought it was Maurice-” you start, only for Sonic to take your hand in his, gently pulling you along.
“C’mon! We wanna get the best seats!” Sonic states.
Boy, was Sonic not prepared for this movie. Luckily (or maybe not so luckily, he hated seeing you scared), you weren’t, either, with you and Sonic clinging onto each other every time there was a scary scene.
When you all exited the theater, you were still slightly shaking.
“R-Remind me not to trust movies with holiday names in them anymore…” you mutter.
“You did say it was gonna be scary, [Nickname].” Sonic tells you.
“Would you like me to take you home?” Shadow asks, holding out a hand for you to take.
“I’ll take ‘em home, Shads!” Sonic suddenly announces, putting an arm around your shoulder. “Besides! I can get them there lickity-split!”
“I appreciate that, Sonic,” you say with a small smile, and Sonic swears he sees a light blush on your cheeks, but he brushes it off.
“Sure thing!” he tells you, before scooping you into a bridal-style carry. “See ya later, Shads! Now hold on tight, [Name]!”
You wrap your arms around Sonic’s neck and he rushes off towards your home to get you back safely.
A few days later, when you texted him asking him to meet up, he was nervous.
What if you were mad at him? What if you told him you didn’t want to be friends?
What if you were dating Shadow?!
He took a deep breath, exhaling sharply.
“Calm down, Sonic. They just want to talk with you. It’s fine,” Sonic says to himself before rushing out of his and Tails’ shared home.
Getting there in the blink of an eye, Sonic immediately notices something.
You.
You’re dressed in a really nice outfit and you have a picnic set up, hiding something behind your back.
You look-
“You look gorgeous…” Sonic mutters aloud.
Your face turns pink, and you look to the side, a bit embarrassed, but you wave him towards you, which he does, sitting on the blanket next to you.
“So…” you start.
“So…” he continues.
You clear your throat with one hand before bringing out what was behind your back; a bouquet of blue orchid flowers, Sonic’s favorites. You hold it out to him and he takes it with a shocked expression, his face tinted pink, cradling the flowers carefully.
“I- But- We- I thought-” Sonic sputters. “I thought you had a crush on Shadow!”
You blink twice before bursting out laughing, hunching back before hunching forward, wiping a few tears from your eyes.
“No, silly! I’ve liked you this whole time!” you tell him. “Shadow felt like a mentor to me. And don’t tell him I told you, but he came to me for love advice.”
“Love advice??? Him???” Sonic questions. “Who could he possibly like??”
Looking around, you cup a hand around your mouth before whispering in Sonic’s ear, and Sonic’s face quickly morphs into one of genuine shock.
“HE HAS A CRUSH ON WHO?!” Sonic yells.
“Don’t say it so loud!” you tell him, letting out another laugh.
“I just- Knuckles???” he questions. “I would’ve never thought!”
You giggle before placing a kiss on Sonic’s cheek, a smile appearing on both of your faces.
Neither of you could be happier.
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beelanddiavolosimp-blog · 24 hours ago
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Time to catch up the side characters!
Side characters react to a MC with a tongue piercing
Diavolo
He honestly never noticed it about MC since he didn't look at their mouth that hard. That is until he started to develop feelings for them he kept staring at their lips and that's when he noticed it. He asks "Hey Mc what's that in your mouth?" MC looks at him confused then makes a 'oh' face and sticks out their tongue. Once he sees it he immediately blushes a bit. "Wow MC that is such a cool piercing probably one of my favorites now!" He says and suddenly cups MC's face examining it more. He eventually backs away. "I'll buy you some jewelry for it right away!" He says excited. He seems to enjoy this piercing too much....
Barb
MC revealed it to him since he personally doesn't care what they do and don't have. As long as MC is with him he's content. They were both having tea when Mc decided to show him. "Hey Barb.....I just wanted to let you know I have a secret piercing..." MC states. Barb looks at them and tilts his head a bit. MC then sticks their tongue out. He doesn't react much just amused MC was that trusting of him. "It's certainly a interesting piercing tell me how it went" he says now pushing their conversation to said piercing.
Simeon
He noticed it right away since he often looks at every detail of a person. Especially if he has a crush on them like MC. He didn't want to outright ask so he kept hinting at it. MC eventually tired of beating around the bush stuck out their tongue. His eyes widen and his cheeks turn a slight pink. "Woah.... you're so cool MC!" He says amazed. He continues to ask some questions here and there and definitely didn't forget about it.
Meso
As MC and him talked his eyes kept catching a small ball. He noticed this for weeks and did not say anything. He finally broke when none of the brothers would say anything to him when he asked. "MC do you have something in your mouth? I keep seeing a light hit a ball?" He says genuinely confused. Once MC stuck out their tongue he felt genuinely stupid. A ball? A piercing! He sighs to himself and then apologized to MC. "I'm sorry for being so invasive I was confused and apparently stupid I should've put two and two together....it does look nice though. But it's distracting!" He retorts
Raphael
He noticed of course nothing slips past him but why pry? It's MC's business not his own. He was slightly curious. Why have it? Does it do something special or something? He actually found out fully when the brothers were yapping about it. He doesn't say anything but does stare at your mouth randomly....just thinking.
Thirteen
Great minds think alike. She noticed immediately because she has an eye for those sort of things. More so to use as a way to prank people so she watches them closely. She did ask about the pain because she wants one of her own and MC and her actually bond over this fact. She really loves it and buys cute jewelry for MC and says how excited she is to match with MC one day.
Solomon
He didn't notice for a while because MC tended to keep their mouth closed around him. (Due to his cooking) He accidentally gave MC his coffee that was WAY too bitter so they stuck their tongue out in disgust which is when he notices it. He immediately smiles excited for some reason. "That piercing is so cool MC I wonder....does what you eat stay on it? Could someone else taste it when they-" MC covers his mouth. Horny bastard.
Luke
He only noticed when Mc started eating infront of him. He of course pipped up and asked the moment he saw it. "MC what is that?" He asks. MC shows him and he immediately looked terrified. "Why would you do that! Doesn't that hurt?" He asks worried for MC once they explained everything was okay he didn't feel as scared. He asked many MANY questions.
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murderdogwater · 2 days ago
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How do the Bachelors and Bachelorettes act when someone flirts with you?
Is this overdone? yeah? do I care? No.
Haley: If Emily's eyes turn red when she's mad, then I wanna say Haley's turn grey, like a storm over the ocean. Haley isn't going to get physical (though she's ready to if she needs to) she's just going to come and mark her territory. Kiss you, hug you, maybe she'll run over calling you a sweet pet name. Either way she’s going to go into full mean girl mode to whoever was flirting at you. And if you let it happen, you might get an earful too.
Abigail: Full scary dog privilege. She's been training with her sword (and maybe the adventures guild) and she has the presence of someone ready to fuck you up. And she will, if the person who's flirting with you doesn't back off. If you let it happen, she's going to immediately get a little mad, so... don't do that.
Leah: Leah is calm, in most cases, and she's calm now. She simply ignores whoever is flirting with you and moves you away to other things. She will get a little suspicious of your loyalty if you were just letting it happen.
Penny: This girl is already insecure and probably already has anxiety. This makes it worse. She'll run up to you and hug you and try not to sound angry about the situation. She'll glare the the person who was flirting with you occasionally she might actually cry if she finds out you were just letting the flirting happen.
Emily: Ever want to see a similarity between Emily and Haley? This is your chance. Emily may not have been a mean girl, but she's a fast learner. She's a bit less obvious about staking her claim on you. She'll just force herself into the conversation, hold onto your arm, hug you, just be obvious about your relationship. If she finds out you let it happen, you may end up with the silent treatment.
Maru: Doesn't strike me as the jealous type, honestly. She seems like she'd trust you not to let it happen, but if it does, she'll probably tell the person that you aren't interested and pull you away. Give you the silent treatment if you just let it happen, and Demetrius and Penny will give you the cold shoulder for a little.
Alex: Scary dog on his way to bark he's tall. He's big. If he doesn't say anything, his presence will. And when they're gone, he's going to shrink back down to dote on you unless you let the flirting happen, then he'll give you the cold shoulder for a bit.
Shane: Shane isn't a big guy, nor is he the most confident, but if someone is flirting with you, he'll approach and probably just drag you away. He'll be silently mad at either you or the person, will probably need a little reassuring after because he does get scared that you'll leave him.
Sam: Golden retriever boyfriend reminds you that while he's sweet, he's still a dog with a pretty decent bite to go with his bark. I like to headcannon that sam is pretty tall and lanky, but when he's mad, he really does look like Kent. Once the situation is over, he'll ask about what happened and if you're okay. If you let the flirting happen, he's going to be a little hurt...
Sebastian: He'll just stand there... menacingly. If the person doesn't get the hint, he'll come over (I don't think Seb can fight), but I think he has enough emo aura to get rid of an asshole. He'll give you the silent treatment if he finds out you just let it happen.
Elliott: Inserts himself in the conversation and out flirts them. If they don’t get uncomfortable and leave on their own, then he'll just lead you away. "Why would you let them flirt with you when I could write poems upon poems about you, my love?" He says as he kisses your hand.
Harvey: Not the biggest or strongest, but when faced with no other options, he'll get a bit confrontational (even though it makes him anxious). He'll tell them you aren't interested and act like they aren’t there until they leave, then he makes sure you're okay. Might get insecure if he finds out you were going along with the flirting. He also gets scared you might leave him.
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kindheartedgummybears · 1 year ago
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you wanna know what??
I am
TIRED
of overmasculinized werewolves!!!!
I WANNA SEE A
WEREWOLF
WALKING AROUND IN A CVNTY LITTLE OUTFIT!!! WALKING THE STREETS!!!! DISEMBOWELING CREATURES!!!!
I WANNA SEE WEREWOLVES COVERED IN BLOOD AND GORE WHILE WEARING A SHORT SKIRT AND CROPTOP WITH HELLO KITTY ON IT!!!!
I WANNA SEE A WEREWOLF WALKING AROUND IN COTTAGE AND FAIRY AND PRINCESS CORE OUTFITS!!!!!! WITH A DEAD MANGLED RABBIT IN ITS MOUTH!!!!
AND MAKE THE WEREWOLF
D I S G U S T I N G ! ! !
#i am TIRED of seeing all these manly man werewolves that are all copy and paste white boys#I am TIRED of seeing all these woman werewolves being butch and masculine(also mostly white) or submissive!!!#I WANNA SEE SOME PLUS-SIZE WEREWOLVES I WANNA SEE SOME BLACK ASIAN LATINO MIDDLE EASTERN NON WHITE WEREWOLVES!!!!! THAT ARNT F3TIZIED!!!!!#I WANNA SEE A G I R L WEREWOLF THATS INTO “G I R L Y” THINGS!!!!! LET THE WEREWOLF BE A SLVT!!!!!#LET THE WEREWOLF BE IN THE TRADITIONAL CLOTHING OF ITS CULTURE!!!!#AND RIP AND TEAR AND MAUL AND CRY IN THE MORNING AFTER DOING ALL OF IT!!!! RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#no but fr can we werewolf fans like. actually sit down and reflect on the inherent misogyny of werewolves??? ESPECIALLY IN MEDIA#like. almost EVERY. SINGLE. WEREWOLF. in movies and shows and stuff are always a buff white man with anger and trust issues#and on the rare occasion that there *is* a woman werewolf shes always either over masculine or “weaker” than the “stronger alpha male” were#olf and only seen as a mate. AND shes always “calmer” and “maternal” and “calms the alpha male down🥺🥺”.AND she never has an actually good#werewolf form its always either wolf tail and ears or full wolf. or if it *is* actually a decent werewolf her transformation is offscreen.#like whyyyyyyyyyyyyy are people so scared to make women go ape shit?????? werewolves are NOT pretty creatures!!!! STOP MAKING THEM PRETTY!!#(lmao jk we know why they're so scared hashtag male gaze)#like yes. werewolves ARE pretty but not in the “dog show 30k$ poodle” kind of way i see some people making them(not that that's bad tho)#AND ALSO LIKE. ARE WE JUST GOING TO PRETEND WEREWOLVES LITERALLY WEREN'T MADE FOR WOMEN AND MINORITIES???#like. once a month someone turns into a raging bloodthirsty unstoppable beast driven by the moon and instincts with an insatiable hunger an#need to hide away from people due to them wanting to kill you or fearing you simply because you're a werewolf. they don't know you. they ju#t see you as a creature that might hurt them. constantly being hunted down to be killed simply for existing.#WHAT PART OF THAT SCREAMS: “ah yes. White man.”#IK theres going be people(men and pick mes) that see this post and think “this bitch is overreacting” and tbh idc.the girls who get it get#the girls who dont dont.#anyways shout out to Ginger Snaps trick or treat and every other piece of media or fan piece with disgusting non-f3tiszied woman/poc werewo#i love yall#*smooch smooch*#Werewolves#Werewolf#Lycanthrope#Lycanthropy#Werewolf AU#Yeah. Im tagging that too. I see yall.
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guinevereslancelot · 4 months ago
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decided to leave my job and i'm gonna fr gonna cryyyyy
#literally can't work with my new boss bc i can't trust her#she went to the head of the department with complaints abt me without ever speaking to me or giving me any indication she was unhappy#and various other reasons im not happy w management and the school in general#HOWEVER#i love the kids sm and im gonna miss them and worry abt them 😭😭😭😭#im literally scared for some of them bc it feels like the other teachers have no empathy for some of my favorite kids#one of them who is so so sweet and when he cries i'm the girst to comfort him bc everyone else thinks he needs to toughen up 😭#also my new boss sucks so so bad and is gonna be such a bad influence on him and all the other kids#and my main co teacher said she's gonna quit if i do so i cant even beg her to look out for my babies and take care of them 😭💔#and it would be unprofessional to mention any concerns to the parents but genuinely some of the kids would be better off elsewhere#like im actually worried about it#i dont want some of the really sweet sensitive kids to lose their sweetness bc they're being treated unkindly#and the worst bullies and spoiled kids are the ones the teachers dote on#so it encourages some of the sweet ones to act out for attention#anyway 💔#i really do need to go tho#and i'm sure i'll love the kids at my new job#but im so sadddd#also its unlikely i can find a well paying job w this age group even tho i love this age group#its basically impossible not to get attached to them at this age and i get to pick them up and hold and cuddle them and stuff#and you cant really do that with the older kids sadly#literally on the verge of tears even seriously thinking abt leaving#things have been p bad for a while due to management but i never seriously considered leaving bc i love the kids so much#but i literally can't see a future here#and my new boss clearly hates me and im worried she's going to try to get me fired#she already made up a bunch of lies about me and its only been three weeks#anyway i only make 15 an hour so hopefully i'll at least get more somewhere else and i know i'll still love the kids#its just really hard#which is why i've stayed this long#i was p unhappy before my new boss even started bc of the way they treated my old boss
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cerealbishh · 3 months ago
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"So... I should have called you when Kathryn came home sick. I just hate this every-other-week mom thing, you know? So when Kat needed me, I just had to show up for her. And I know it doesn't make sense-"
"No, it- it does make sense. Why do you think I let them eat ice cream at midnight? And look, I overreacted too, because of my weird-ass relationship with my father..."
#cbs matlock#matlock reboot#matlock 01x02#olympia lawrence#julian markston#julympia?#olympian?#olympia x julian#please... not the cheeky little eye squint they both do at each other in the second gif! that felt the teeeeeeeniest bit flirty to me#he knows her moves!!!#he stared at her for quite a bit in the 4th gif and i like that he doesn't hold her back from doing her job but that's a low bar#the way she laughs with him in the last gif! it makes me feel like... in a weird way she's most vulnerable with him(and elijah)#her smile when she says ''seems like we know each other pretty well''#and the way he got her to break into a laugh when she was trying to maintain a straight face#also the way he nudges her leg with his hand#i love them being friends... but i mayyyybe sense something more#i think maybe julian was close to turning his dad in and that's why his dad doesn't trust him??? but maybe i just have a jason ritter bias#matlock spoilers?#skye has said that daddy dearest is trying to pit them against each other... so i feel that that's why there's some mistrust going on#i love that in both episodes it sort of ends with him being there for her so i'm scared of when that won't happen#they kinda make me miss don and nyla#skye also said that one of the biggest reasons olympia loves julian is because he gives them both have the space to work and be a family#matlock spoilers#they kinda are giving parent energy in the last gif#tw: food#they're both just trying their best tbh#skye p. marshall#jason ritter#i changed the third gif because i liked that you could sort of see olympia smiling and REEEEEALLY see julian just shaking his head
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willowfey · 1 year ago
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starting to think maybe waking up with an anxiety stomachache every single morning and then needing to spend the entire day trying to get rid of said anxiety just to maybe have a few minutes in the evening of feeling relaxed before going to bed is perhaps not normal
#the first thing i do when i become conscious is check my phone to make sure nothing terrible happened to anyone i love while i slept#i never ever ever have plans and if anyone Else has plans i feel sick with anxiety until they’re back from them#if i have smth planned that week i feel completely tense and on edge until it happens#i didn’t used to be like this i hate hate hate it#i used to feel safe in my little house in the forest where i knew everyone in town and knew my way around with my eyes shut#it’s still the only place in the world i feel safe. that’s so unfair#my separation anxiety is ridiculous. if my mom goes to the store and doesn’t answer a text right away i start panicking#if my sister goes to a class or smth idk what to do with myself until she gets back#if i’m in the shower or have the fan on or headphones in suddenly i’ll think i hear someone shouting and i’ll have to quickly turn it off#ever since i moved here it’s been getting worse. i don’t feel safe here to begin with i feel so out of place it’s unreal#but then covid and trauma with my mother’s health and my uncle dying and multiple relatives getting sick and things happening to my friends#i know i have ptsd from very specific things that happened and i live on a hospital path so every day i hear sirens#and every time i do it fully triggers an anxiety attack in me for at least an hour. and my mom too#since being here my hometown burned and friends i thought would never grow apart did and my brother moved out#i know a lot of that is just Being In Your Low Twenties but also some of my worst trauma has happened in the last handful of years and now#now i’m just always scared. always uneasy. always worried. never fully relaxed. never feel fully safe. & idk how to be myself through that#i’m always paranoid and i never trust people irl anymore. ppl my mom or sister meet. i am so suspicious of them constantly.#if anything small changes at all i can’t handle it. my ability to deal with change has gone so downhill#in the last 5 years of being here i realised i was autistic which led to me unmasking a bit and that. comes with pros & cons doesn’t it#my own health has declined. my body changed a lot in ways i wasn’t prepared for and i had to get rid of most of my comfort clothes#sometimes i just wanna sit on the ground and cry about it and not have to also be the one that picks myself back up. y’know???#but at the very least i’d love to just wake up One Day w/o feeling sick with anxiety already. just one day i want to wake up feeling rested#i want to be myself again but can i start with not being scared? not being tired? i don’t know what to do anymore#i just watch my comfort videos and read my comfort fics and stay in my daydream world
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themyscirah · 10 months ago
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I should make a post about how insane Diana being chosen as champion is at one point. Like yes ik in most versions it was an anonymous competition but like the sheer level of trust and hope and desire for reconciliation and peace that comes with that gesture is a so insane to me. Hippolyta the woman that you are...
#just so crazy to me. also the amount of FEAR hippolyta and the amazons must have been feeling like that. like i know were told the story#through dianas pov but no WONDER they didnt want her to go/were scared of her going.#like she was the ONLY child in thousands of years and the only one who didnt live firsthand the cruelties that lead to them moving to#themyscira like hippolyta is one of the characters of all time to me but just like#having to send your only daughter out as an emissary of your culture to a world she has never been to and knows little of#and you havent been to in thousands of years. yet the last time you were there your entire society were captured beated and sexually#assaulted for just being themselves and expression their culture...#hippolyta omg just... damn#the weight of this isnt acknowledged nearly enough imo. like diana isnt the ambassador because shes “the princess” she has this job because#she doesnt carry the weight of this past violence the same way (as she never lived it)#and so this lets her trust and be open in a way that some of the other amazons cant. its a new beginning for the relationship between them#its the ultimate show of trust and faith of peace and friendship between the groups#like shes their heart shes their future#and yes in most versions they dont know diana is going to be champion until after the competition and shes usually masked but this doesnt#make the meaning her specific story adds to the role less true#wonder woman#diana of themyscira#hippolyta of themyscira#blah
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nexus-nebulae · 4 months ago
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another childhood bucket list item obtained: i finally have a snuggie
#and it's the real thing not even a knockoff#kinda surprised they still exist#but also not surprised bc Blanket. blanket is universal#i just remember a lot of those As Seen On Tv ads like. imploding within 5 years#they still do As Seen On Tv products like there are still boxes marked with that logo it almost feels wrong like an ancient relic#bc most like. ubiquitous 2000s brands from my childhood are just Gone or at least so fundamentally changed it's not the same thing#heard about like 50 more companies going bankrupt probably in the last year alone#anyway ive always wanted a snuggie it's one of those Always Wanted things that never go away#others include: staples easy button (obtained!); mini fridge (not); pillow pet (i had a knockoff once); power drill (not)#i spent a surprising amount of my childhood actually going out of my way to buy stuff i could use in my own apartment in the future#i grew up lower middle class and then just lower class#so like. i always Knew i couldn't just furnish the whole apartment at once i Knew I'd have to build stuff up over time#also bc when my sister got kicked out she had like. nothing. in her trailer. and i did not want to have nothing#i knew if dad was willing to just toss out my sister like that i would absolutely follow suit#and i did! two years younger than my sister when she was!#it just happened that my mom didn't want me homeless at FOURTEEN when i legally could not work for two more years#so she went with me and we lived with my grandma#so take that dad. turns out throwing family members out willy nilly makes the rest of your family not trust you or like you!#and now i get to rub it in his face that HE can't function in a house by himself and still needs to beg my mom to clean up after him#bc i spent so much of my childhood getting berated and called lazy for not doing chores#getting told stuff like 'you have to function by yourself your parents can't always pick up after you'#and then he's literally useless without his wife#he's not disabled and he's not neurodivergent he's never even had a serious health scare he just doesn't bother to learn how to clean#his excuse is that he doesn't know how to use the washer and dryer (it has been almost ten years fucker. learn)#or he doesn't know which cleaning products to use (you have google and a library card. LOOK IT UP)#he's the only person i get mad at for this behaviour bc he's a fucking hypocrite and a child abuser about it too#he is the exception to my rule of everyone needs to be given the space to get things done where they're able and deserve help when needed#and I'll bend over backwards to make excuses for other people so i DONT exclude them from my rule i will try to find every good reason first#he has no fucking excuse though he made two teenagers nearly homeless bc he thought we were too lazy and then he's even worse
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girlcrushau · 10 months ago
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#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/#but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment#i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating#there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2#months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it#not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him#in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to.#until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if#he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone#and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think#there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy#your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you)#and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly#so last night#i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text.#i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart#until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent#that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real#did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart#and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about#and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in#which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever#it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in.#just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the#reason that he went away on me.#im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying#not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me#that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest.#and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs#he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am
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swordmaid · 1 year ago
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for me… FOR ME..!!! and for shri’iia specifically the lock in for astarion’s romance is his graveyard scene in act 3.
i think it is too quick for shri’iia to be moving on to another relationship considering her previous one was with her mistress who essentially groomed and isolated her for like … more than hundred years. learning to chase her own desires and not moulding herself to what anyone wants her to be is something so new to her…!!! and something that she’s still learning how to be comfortable with….
and what I like abt romancing astarion with her is that I usually go for the dialogue path in his act 2 confession scene where you can ask him:
- what do YOU want to do?
and he goes like honestly idk what we’re doing but /this/ is nice. it just feels like two people exploring the option to love for the first time and taking things in their own pace rather than jumping straight into the relationship. they’re going at a snails pace… they don’t know what they’re doing but they like this feeling and the vibe and they want to more of it but they’re not ready to commit to anything yet and it’s fine for them …!! and they’re only committing by the end in the graveyard scene where significant time has passed and they’ve learnt a little more about themselves and they’re both more confident about their own desires and also how they want to be loved.
like it is so fitting I think… and sweet… not to mention astarion being a high elf & a vampire and shri’iia being a drow, they have all the time of the world for themselves so I def think they would want to take their time. except if shri’iia turns into a mindflayer or drider by the end then that plan is out the window lol
#now I’m thinking who else I can romance with her .. maybe lae’zel ??#since the thing with her is that she doesn’t get vulnerable in act 1 so the scenes where the romances#are kind of heart to hearts like shadowheart’s or karlach’s (😭😭😭) is out of the question since it doesn’t fit her …#like she’d rather sleep with someone first than actually get to know them 😭 hence astarion and lae’zel …#gale and wyll… I am hmmm about it on one hand her approval with wyll in act 1 is not even high enough 😭😭#and I don’t think she can be sweet enough to chase after him in the party .. she was kind of like ok fine whatever when he said he’s not in#the mood … gale I think can be a contender .. I actually don’t know how his route goes so I’m not sure abt that …#but the thing is … she gets vulnerable LATER ..!! and why astarion’s romance work for her is i hc after their act 2 scene#they’re just in a situationship rather than actual relationship … like they’re dating (yes!) but also dating (hmmmm)#and it’s only in his last scene where they both lock in bc I think that’s enough time for her to process her OWN trauma and also for her#own character development … like she has to learn how to trust (ack!!!!) which is the thing that you don’t do when you’re raised in lolth’s#cult …. and her mistress manipulated her trust too so it’s even more nerve wracking for her bc she doesn’t want someone to have that power#over her again .. but now she has to learn how to give it away freely … without being scared … bites my hand …!!!!#and astarion graveyard scene where he wants to live again vs shri’iia learning how to trust again and trying to live without the fear of#someone betraying you and using you and the paranoia that comes with it … urck urgh goughhhhhh critical hit …#also I have a hc that she actually is quite good at making poisons since her mother sold alchemy herbs and components#and she gives him poison as a courting gift lol .. also like a way to protect him 🤭 but she won’t admit that … she’s like if you want it#take it if you don’t idc 🤷‍♀️ (she does..) i hc that she gets flustered at sincerity actually#their relationship for me is like they’re both two little shits and a general menace to society (both charlatans)#but if they had to hold hands she’d get too flustered too and he’s like honestly what are you a child? (smug face making fun of her)#I have this little comic idea for them when they held hands for the first time and she’s like ouggghhh 😳😮‍💨 flustered and sweating and he’s#like hihi 🤭😎 but then their hands starts to get sweaty and then he’s like ew that’s disgusting and she’s like ok if u hate it let go then#and he’s like no YOU let go 🙄 but they don’t let go now they have to suffer through the sweaty hand holding alas such is fate …
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