#t see you as a creature that might hurt them. constantly being hunted down to be killed simply for existing.

[kindheartedgummybears]

you wanna know what??

I am

TIRED

of overmasculinized werewolves!!!!

I WANNA SEE A

WEREWOLF

WALKING AROUND IN A CVNTY LITTLE OUTFIT!!! WALKING THE STREETS!!!! DISEMBOWELING CREATURES!!!!

I WANNA SEE WEREWOLVES COVERED IN BLOOD AND GORE WHILE WEARING A SHORT SKIRT AND CROPTOP WITH HELLO KITTY ON IT!!!!

I WANNA SEE A WEREWOLF WALKING AROUND IN COTTAGE AND FAIRY AND PRINCESS CORE OUTFITS!!!!!! WITH A DEAD MANGLED RABBIT IN ITS MOUTH!!!!

AND MAKE THE WEREWOLF

D I S G U S T I N G ! ! !

[glacierbash]

Hello i Will Not Be Tagging This but i wrote like 5000 words and. this is deadass just me kinda feeling the waters, trying to get Adella’s personality down (girl PLEASE speak to me more there is Not Enough For Me To Go Off Of oh my gOD) anyways it’s gay because i am gay. dkfkgjfaksdfds

The hunter had slaughtered many beasts, dismembered many humans, and killed whatever might lay in between. To her, they were just one of many. The beasts came endlessly, so she hunted endlessly. 

Such monotony was bound to grate on her nerves eventually, so when she encountered the strange being with the sack, she was more than excited.

Having felled the Bloodstarved Beast that she had been tasked with hunting before trying her hand at Vicar Amelia once more, Eva found the grand cathedral and the area around it… Different. Perhaps the biggest difference was how she was loathe to be greeted by any of those damned church servants.

Upon wishing Arianna farewell, blood vial in hand, Eva had strode out of the cathedral with confidence, eager to let blood taste the serrated edge of her saw. Such plans were quickly set into play when she saw the new creature, sack in hand. It had large hands with long, thin fingers and a pale, gaunt face. It sent shivers down her spine, but not of apprehension.

No, she felt excited. With a flick of her wrist, her saw flipped open, and she began her approach. The creature, just as Eva began to stalk it, had turned its head away. It should have been an easy kill, once no more challenging than the fools she has already encountered.

And so when the being whipped around and grabbed onto her blade just before it could connect with its back, Eva could find no words to describe her horror.

Instantly, she went to jump back, but the grip was strong on her weapon and she refused to risk dropping it. What should’ve been a tense game of strength ended quickly when the being shoved her and the cleaver back, sending her sliding several feet away.

As she took the time to close the cleaver back into its short form, she barely had time to look up and see the being lunge at her. There was no time for a dodge, or to use her gun, and all she could do was brace herself for what would be a painful blow.

And painful it was, as she was ripped open by what felt like claws. Eva let out a cry, trying to charge forward in some sort of pitiful counterattack. Such was expected by the being, who managed to step to the side. 

Her back exposed meant there was little more she could do. Claws raked her back, her own blood began to soak through her jacket, and she barely had time to look back in horror at the new terror she would have to face before it curled the long fingers into a fist and brought it down upon her.

The last thing she saw were terrible, empty eyes.

She had awoken, but not within the dream, or next to Andrew at a lamp. There was no comfort here, no soothing words or teasing lessons. There was only a dull ache as her head thudded from dull pain, one eye swollen almost completely shut. Her back felt as if her muscles were completely ripped, and standing felt more laborious than taking on any of the beasts she had fought already. 

But a hunter does not give up.

Slowly, painfully, she forced herself to her knees, first. That already felt like hell, but on the plus side that meant everything was at least working (hopefully).

Then, she inched forward and grabbed onto the bars of the cage where she was, pulling herself to her feet.

From there, she could finally take in her surroundings as well as evaluate her own state. She decided to examine first, as her own body could wait. She would hear anything coming in time, and perhaps then death would be genuine.

From what Eva could tell, she most certainly was in a cage. Dank walls, dripping with moisture, and chains galore made for a certainly unique atmosphere. There were footsteps in the distance, as well as whispers, but none approaching. If anything, they all sounded to be moving away from her. Nearby, there was a staircase, and many more potentially opened doors to walk through.

Satisfied with what she saw, she then turned her attentioned to herself. The gashes in her body had healed, but only a tiny bit. She could only imagine what her back looked like. With a shaky hand, she began to fumble around in her pockets, wincing as shattered glass threatened to cut open her hand. However, she found an unharmed blood vial, a sight that made her beam.

She quickly jammed it into her leg, giving a relieved sigh as the pain instantly began to dull, and then come to an end. She knew they were still there, the grievous injuries, but they stopped hurting, and that was what mattered. 

Finally able to move without pain, Eva looked around for her cleaver. Thankfully, it was right next to her. She grabbed it up, and then pushed on the cage door keeping her contained.

She had fully prepared for some sort of jailbreak, but it simply… Opened. Without a worry, just a loud screech.

Freed from her prison, she first turned her attention to the staircase leading down at her right. She hesitated, before she tightened her grip on the axe and then began to creep downwards.

Upon reaching the bottom and with a quick scour around, she found nothing of harm. She was tempted to simply climb back up and continue trying to find a place to escape, when she then noticed something… Interesting.

A voice. 

A human voice.

Clear as day, completely sane. A complete and utter blessing considering what she had endured during the last time she had been on the hunt.

Turning towards the voice, she began to walk towards it, no longer concerned with any stealth. She just needed to find this figure, talk to them…

"Please, leave me be... Don't take me... Please... Oh, please, dear gods."

The voice was clear as day, just as Eva was about to smash a pot in frustration. Rather than attack, she gently moved the pot in the way to the side, taking a step forward towards the figure she saw.

A young woman, wearing some sort of church garb. Eva gave a quick glance down at herself, giving a tiny smile when she realized she wore the robes of the black church. Then, she slowly bent down, reaching a hand out. “Hey there.”

The woman instantly jumped, about to whimper before she turned and took a long look at Eva. Fear faded to ecstatic joy as she gave a tense smile. “B-By your garb, you’re--”

“Yes, I am.” Eva kept smiling, though deep down she hoped the woman wouldn’t start questioning her; truth be told, her knowledge of the churches in yharnam was… negligible at best.

However, the woman did not dare question her savior. Instead, she continued to beam at her. “You’ve come to save me, haven’t you?”

“One could say. Are you alright?” Eva continued to offer her hand, and after a moment of hesitation, the woman took it.

“Better now that I've been f-found.” She laughed nervously, letting Eva pull her up. “Oh, thank you. T-There isn’t much I could offer you, but--”

“No need.” Eva pulled down the covering she wore over her face, just to make her own smile clear. This made the woman seem to relax, just a bit. “Have you got a name?”

“Oh! I should have said, my apologies… I am Adella.”

“And I am Eva.” She took a step back before giving a low bow, the same Hunter’s Salutation that Andrew had taught her. She never expected it to come in handy…

“I… I must say thank you, once more. I didn’t expect to come out of here alive, actually..!” A quiet laugh. “I was seized off the streets of the Cathedral Ward by this big, hulking brute. There were others, too. Many others. But…”

“There seems to be a large lack of ‘others,’ hmm?”

“Correct.” Adella glanced down, before back up. “And with the hunt, the doors shall be locked tight. Perhaps… Perhaps this isn’t my place to ask, good hunter, but… Do you know of any place one could stay..? A place that may take me in?”

“Actually, I do. Oedon Chapel. How, though, do you plan to get there?”

Adella’s face fell. “Oh.”

“If you were taken off the streets by just one, how would you face whatever horrors lay here?”

“Ah…”

“Or what about the beasts, or those other hunters with the torches and the guns and the dogs?”

Nothing from her this time. 

Eva instantly felt a pang of guilt upon seeing the way Adella’s face fell. She reached out a hand, gently touching her shoulder. “...My friend, how about I escort you out?”

“Would you..?”

“Why else would I offer? I can hunt, and therefore I can protect us. You just need to be prepared to run. Leave me if things get tough.”

Adella hesitated, before she began to smile again. “Oh, I’m so happy..! But I do not want to be a burden on you.”

“Nonsense. Truly, Adella, it shall be no worry. So long as you stick close and do as I say, you shall escape safely.”

After a second longer, the nun gave a nod. “I trust you, good hunter.”

“I shall not let you down.”

Eva nodded back before she turned around and began to climb up the stairs. She walked slowly, until she heard Adella close behind. From then on, she refused to slow down. Perhaps, going ahead and slaughtering the beasts ahead would’ve been smarter, but…

If the being with the sack had captured them both with ease, and nearly slaughtered Eva with just two hits, she didn’t exactly wish to be the one fighting it head on. Simply bolting would be the best option, as embarrassing as it was. Perhaps she could simply excuse it as living to fight another day..!

Reaching the cell where Eva had awoken in, she found a small spiral staircase. That had to be the way out, as there was nothing else in sight. Eva took one more look at Adella, who gave a small nod.

Eva then began to climb up stairs, constantly glancing back to make sure Adella was close. Luckily for her, the nun moved with the same amount of agency, and even when Eva began to run Adella kept close behind.

Soon, she made it to the second floor, where intuition tugged at her. Sure, she could awaken in the hunter’s dream and then proceed to wake up wherever, but she didn’t know what might happen to Adella if she did so. Therefore, Eva prepared for what may appear in the best way possible: Sheathing her blade and picking up Adella. She gasped as Eva did so, almost wiggling out of her grasp. “What are you--”

“Shh! I refuse to get into any fight here. Hold onto me. I think I have an idea where the exit is. We just have to, uh… Survive.”

“This is suicidal!”

Eva just tightened her grasp on Adella, and finally the nun wrapped her arms around Eva’s neck. 

With a quiet sigh, Eva took two long strides and then broke out into a run, jumping as incoming hands tried to swipe at her. She then turned backwards and jumped once more, sliding on her back end over a table. Hitting the ground, she continued to sprint forward.

Two of those strange “snatchers” with the bags soon came into view, standing by a table. Adella clung to Eva even tighter at the sight of them, looking away. Eva steeled herself, taking a quick look around and what might be there to help her.

Before she could formulate a plan, however, one of the Snatchers was already about to swipe at her. At the last second, Eva jumped up, both feet planting on the face of the Snatcher. The other one swiped too, but she had already jumped high into the air, sailing over a ledge and beginning to plummet down low.

Adella screamed, but before it was too loud, they both hit the ground. Eva absorbed all the impact, a sick crack sounding as her legs felt almost broken from the impact. Slowly she began to stagger up, taking a look around as she set Adella down. “That… could’ve gone worse.”

“You almost got us both killed!” Adella gave her a concerned look. “Are you mad?”

“No. I just needed us out of there. Now come on, I think I see a door.”

What Eva didn’t mention was that she also saw a gigantic sleeping beast, electricity crackling off of its body. No doubt, Adella saw it too, but she didn’t say anything. Good for both their hearts, Eva supposed.

From there, they crossed oh so quietly what could’ve been the arena of a tense fight, one bound to end with both of them dead. Reaching the door on the opposite side, Eva slowly pushed it open. Once more, the beast didn’t move.

When it finally did open, Eva ushered in Adella before she shut it behind her. Only then did the beast even begin to stir, but by the time it did Adella was already beginning to make her way up with Eva close behind.

“Do you know where we are?” Adella asked after several moments of tense silence, causing Eva to shrug.

“If I had to guess..? Old Yharnam.”

“W-We are?”

“Probably. I don’t know many other low places, and we seemed to be pretty deep, from the looks of that beast’s den. We make it through here, and then we can reach the Cathedral Ward, and Oedon Chapel!”

Adella looked back in front of her, shivering a bit. “What might we… encounter here?”

“Oh, shouldn’t be much. I have already slain most of the beasts here. Just… Keep an eye out for the gun.”

“The what?”

“The gun.”

Adella was about to say something else when Eva instinctively reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling her back a bit. “I’ll lead from here.”

“A-Alright. You know best, after all…”

Eva looked back with a small frown, before it faded. “Just trying to keep you alive, friend.”

Adella didn’t reply to that, looking more than a bit stressed out.

The hunter scoured the area in front of them, as they had just reached an exit into the streets. Nothing, though, seemed to be moving. Giving Adella a nod, she began to run to the opposite street, with Adella yelping and following after.

Reaching it felt like a hollow victory, as Eva knew just how persistent the gun hunter could be if they got spotted. Sure, they had the element of surprise now, but what about later on, when they have to cross his vision? Of course, the hunter did not wish to worry the nun, but she felt like it would be impossible to make it across without drawing at least some attention.

Oh, well.

It would appear Eva had been right about the beasts not being there, as where there should’ve been many enemies, it was quite empty. Only the corpses littered the streets, the familiar serrated edge in many of the bodies. Adella shuddered as they both stepped over one. “Have I said thank you yet?”

“Several times. But, you’re welcome.” Eva glanced back and gave a smile. Adella tapped one of the corpses with her shoe, before backing away.

“How… Could I repay you?”

“Too early to think about that. Besides, I do not need much.” Eva began to run down the streets again, with Adella close behind.

“Perhaps it is too soon to offer, but--”

“It is too soon. Just focus on arriving alive, okay? You seem far too nice to just let die. One of the only nice people I’ve met so far..!”

Adella gave a weak smile, coming to a stop next to Eva when they crossed the street. “Well, you did save me. It was… kind of you to do so.”

“I may be a hunter, but… That does not stop me from wanting to help people.” Eva once more placed a hand on Adella’s shoulder, before she pointed ahead. “Look, that room there… Once we’re in it, we begin climbing up. From there, it should only take about five or so minutes to mad-dash to the chapel. Be wary for any potential flames, and then simply keep close. We’ll need to be quick and speedy, and if you happen to see any other hunters… Well, simply put, we aren’t exactly friendly towards each other.”

“What did you do..?”

Eva let out an involuntary snort. “Exist.” 

Adella didn’t laugh at that.

“Well, genuinely..? I’m a hunter. I hunt. The hunters here don’t. Suppose they aren’t exactly hunters then, eh? Well, the point being, they don’t wish for the beasts here to die, and I might have… Killed many of them. Granted, they were trying to kill me first…”

“O-Oh.” Adella purses her lips a bit, before looking around. “Shall we… head in?”

“Thought you’d never ask.” Eva sighed and then walked into the large building. 

As expected, many beast corpses lined the floor. Oils, as well as charred and singed wood indicated the path where Eva had slaughtered many before. Adella walked close behind, stepping over the corpses that Eva didn’t kick away. “T-There are so many... “

“Exactly, I was shocked. They just kept coming, honestly. You could never stop them all--Or, that’s how it felt like.” Eva paused and knelt down, picking up a small bullet from the corpse. She examined it, before tossing it to the side. “But they stopped coming eventually. They always do. They cannot fight forever, after all.”

Adella looked at the blood-stained floor, before she slowly looked back up. “You’re clearly quite skilled at this, aren’t you?”

“One could say.”

“...Does it ever scare you?”

“Does what?”

“The fact that you are so… skilled at killing the beasts, I suppose.” 

Eva turned to stare at her, before she gave a silent nod. “It does.”

She then continued forward without another word, and Adella followed after.

Upon ascending the stairs, Adella was about to cross forward, when Eva placed a hand on her shoulder. “Halt. This is where we come into the view of the hunter. He has a very large gun and has a tendency to… shoot first, ask questions later. As they all do, eh? Stick very close to me, and when I say run, you run. Even if I end up riddled with bullets, you keep running. Worst-case scenario and I end up down? I’ll return as quickly as I can. Do you understand?”

Adella nodded silently, creeping up close behind to Eva. Together, they passed the ladder leading to the top of the tower where the gun-hunter sat, and soon they stood in front of a long stretch of land. Dead trees planted in gardens lined the path, but they would do little to protect against the coming barrage of bullets. Eva gave Adella’s hand a gentle squeeze, before looking up, nodding, and pushing her forward.

The second Adella began to run, Eva followed after, and a beat later the gunfire began. Adella sped up, and soon she was inside the building and hiding behind a wall, out of the way of the gun. Eva began to cheer for her, when she felt herself falter.

Instantly, she could feel bullets begin ripping into her, leaving her wracked with awful pain. She pushed forward, but the moment she reached inside the house and out of range of the gun, she collapsed to her knees and began to cough. There were hands on her quickly.

“Are you--”

“I’m f--cough--fine.” Eva slowly staggered up, looking down at the one hole in her abdomen where the bullet actually passed through. “I’m just glad it was me and not you. Are you hurt?”

“I fell when I made it inside, but other than that…” Adella gently touched her back, pulling her hand away when Eva winced.

“I’ll be fine, I’ve had worse. It is my duty, after all. Come on, let’s keep moving.”

Eva continued along, stepping over even more beast patient corpses, before they reached a decrepit wooden plank acting as a bridge. Eva grabbed Adella’s hand, giving a small nod. “He’s going to be shooting again.”

“Will he ever quit?”

“When we’re out of Old Yharnam, he will. Ready?”

“I am prepared.”

Eva took a deep, pained breath, and then began to sprint forward, tugging Adella along behind her. Crossing the bridge was easy, though the planks broke just a moment after Adella crossed over them. Making a sharp right turn, Eva ran forward, and then when she reached the door, she used all her might to launch Adella into the room, before she ran in after.

This ended up much better than before, with the gun only starting after they were both safely inside. Eva slowly slid to the floor against a wall, giving a small smile. “Do you know what would be awful?”

“...What?” Adella took a seat next to her, giving a concerned look.

“If I accidentally got us trapped.” Eva smiled softly, before shaking her head. “I usually just kind of… jump to get here. But sadly, I lack superhuman legs. So we need to go up stairs. Stairs that’ll probably get us shot at.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. Heh. Not gonna be too bad though, compared to the shit we’ve already crossed. Imagine doing this with all the beasts alive. Now that would be damn near impossible.” Eva slowly stood up, before she helped Adella stand. “You’ll be fine, I promise you. We’re getting to the end, I swear.”

Eva then led her up the stairs, waiting until the last possible moment to break out into a mad dash towards the top. There was only a little ways to go before they could reach the end of the gun’s range, and soon they would be safe.

By this time, at least for Eva, she felt no more adrenaline rush. No more excitement. She hardly even felt any fear. Even if she got shot to death, she would just come back a few moments later.

Luckily for her and her moping, there was no getting shot. They reached the large, steady bridge with ease, and the gun finally stopped firing. They both shared a look, before at the same time they began to laugh. It was quiet, perhaps more out of fear in Adella’s case, but it was the first sign Eva found that she had actually succeeded.

They were alive.

Eva fumbled in her pockets for another unbroken blood vial, slowing to a walk as she crossed the bridge with the nun next to her. “We are almost to our destination. That was exciting, wasn’t it?”

“Exciting isn’t exactly the word I would use for that, good hunter. But… You did save me.” Adella gave a soft smile at Eva. “Thank you for that.”

Eva dipped her head. “Of course. A hunter is no different than the beasts they hunt if you do not show care for others. My mentor has drilled that into me over and over again. Now… Not hurt?”

“My feet are sore and my heart feels like it’s about to burst, but-- H-Hey!”

Upon hearing Adella begin to complain, Eva had instantly scooped her up, holding her close to her chest. “I can handle that.”

“I didn’t mean for you to c-carry me!” Adella grimaced. “Last time you did, you gave me a heart attack.”

“This is easy. Just walking up a few flights of stairs.” Eva continued on, soon reaching the doors out of Old Yharnam. “Just a little further.”

Adella sighed, before she leaned into Eva’s chest.

Carrying the nun up the last stretch of the journey was much easier than the rest of it, and without anything of note, they soon stood together at the entrance to Odeon Chapel.

“Huh… You weren’t lying..!” Adella looked inside of it, before she gave a quiet laugh. “I’m… a bit surprised, honestly.”

“Well, I am an honest woman. Here.” Eva set her down, before taking her hand and slowly guiding her inside. “You needn’t make much discussion with anybody, I am simply going to tell the owner of this place that you’re here. I’ll be back.”

Eva then let go of her, before she jogged to where the Chapel Dweller… Sat? Lay? She didn’t ever put much thought into it. He slowly glanced up at hearing Eva approach, but when she spoke a small smile spread across his face.

“Hello sir, I have brought another one.”

“O-Oh, did ya?” He smiled at her. “Well… Well, thank ya! And I’m sure they thank ya too! You’re… You’re doin’ a great service to us all, ya know that?”

Eva smiled softly down at him. “Of course. I’m happy to help. Her name is Adella. Nun, part of the church. Got kidnapped, but here she should be safe.”

“I’ll do everything in my power to keep her protected, good hunter. Are you alright?”

“Oh, yeah. Just had a bit of trouble escorting her here. She’s safe, though. So we don’t have to worry. I’ll stop by in a few, once I’ve cleaned up a few more… Lose ends.”

“W-Well alright then! I look forward to it!” The chapel dweller smiled at her once more, bringing a small smile to Eva’s own face. He was an honestly good man, and Eva found herself to quite enjoy his company.

She then turned and walked back down the few stairs, giving a small wave to Arianna as she did. Arianna gave a small smile and waved back.

Adella had situated herself in a small corner behind some old pillar, hands clasped together and head bent down. She had taken off her hat/hood mix, leaving her with just a messy braid. Eva gently tapped her, which made her jump once more.

“Oh..! Oh! It’s just you.” She gave a warm smile, already much more at ease. “I have already thanked you before, but I must thank you again. Truly. The town may be in disarray, but there are still people here. I suppose all we can do now is wait for the healing church.” A pause, before a small sigh. “I cannot even begin to truly express my gratitude towards you. The only thing I could offer is my own lowly blood… If such a thing would suffice.”

This made Eva perk up, more so out of concern than interest. And then she remembered that she was currently in Yharnam, where blood seemed to be passed around lightly. The concern only slightly ebbed away. “I… suppose if it would make you happy, then I shall… Accept.”

Adella’s face lit up, and she began to feel around herself. “Yes, alright. Come closer now.”

Eva did so, standing as close as she could. Accepting blood felt… More than a bit awkward. She still wasn’t used to it. One moment she was standing there as the nun seemed excited at the thought of giving up blood, and the next Adella was gently closing Eva’s fingers around a vial of, sure enough, her own blood. “I hope it shall serve you well, brave hunter.”

“I’m… Sure it shall.” Eva took a step back and then bowed to her. “Rest up. I shall return soon, just to check up on you. Farewell.” She then turned, but she could see Adella watching her until she completely turned the corner.

Finally she took the moment to take a true breather, to lift her head up and take in the cool air, to relax and--

“Well, well, well, you’ve finally returned from your little… Foray into Yahar’gul, eh?” Appearing next to her, arms crossed and axe bloodied, was indeed her mentor. A man named Andrew, a skilled hunter who sought to pass his skills on to Eva. Who also had a habit of appearing at random during the worst times.

“That’s where I was?” Eva looked down at him, frowning.

“You don’t even know what I mean by that, do you?”

“Not in the slightest.”

“Expected.” Andrew yawned slightly. “The nun you rescued… She makes you happy, doesn’t she?”

“I’ve known her for maybe an hour, Andrew.”

“I was young once too. I know how your brain works.”

“Are you saying--” “Am I wrong?”

Eva hesitated, before she slowly shook her head. “But feelings are frivolous during the hunt, that’s just what you’re gonna say.”

“On the contrary, I find it important to remain in touch with human things such as emotions. You feeling for her..? While a weakness in some cases, it could very well be the difference between you continuing as you are, or ending up no better than the slobbering, awful beasts you clobber currently.”

“Huh. That… makes sense.”

Andrew gave a fake, exaggerated gasp. “It is almost like the teacher has some things to teach you!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Eva sighed, looking at the blood vial in her hand. “I… yeah.”

“I get it.” Andrew gently rubbed her back. “Take a moment to rest and recover. There is hunting to be done still, but I’ll leave you to get to know your new… friend.” His eyes crinkled like he was smiling, which soon made Eva smile as well.

“Right.” She looked at the vial once more. “I’ll see you--”

He had already disappeared.

Eva’s smile slowly faded, and she pocketed the vial of blood without another word. The hunt felt more… alive, now. She felt more alive.

It was a strange feeling.

Eva didn’t quite know whether she liked it or not.

[flutteringphalanges]

Summary:  “Am I in Hell?” Agatha’s voice was hoarse, a hint of fear in her tone. “That depends on your definition,” Dracula answered. “Perhaps.” His fingers felt cool against her burning skin, the fever raging through her body. “If you’re going to kill me, then do it,” she mumbled. The count chuckled, gazing into her eyes. “On the contrary,” he smirked. “I’m going to save you.”

((In which Dracula cares for a gravely ill Agatha))

Characters: Agatha Van Helsing/Dracula

Rating: T

Read on FFN and AO3

A/N: Sorry for the delay! Thank you all so much for the feedback! I hope you enjoy! -Jen

                                                 Chapter Five

"You're dead."

Ten year old Agatha Van Helsing yelped in surprise as she was swiftly knocked off her feet, her back hitting the ground hard as her grandfather loomed over her. Abraham's weathered face showed no sympathy as he held a stick right underneath the girl's chin. Out of the corner of her eye, Agatha saw her own weapon lying far from her reach.

"Stand up," the old man grumbled. "You let your guard down again. In a matter of seconds, you could've been taken advantage of and drained of your life blood." He motioned towards her stick. "Again."

"We've been doing this for hours," the child complained. By now, bruises had already begun to form on the places that had been battered the most. She hated practicing combat, especially when it was with someone as highly skilled as her grandfather. "Can't we take a break?"

"There are no breaks when you're being hunted," Abraham replied firmly. "Now quit your protesting and come at me. We are going to keep doing this until you get it right." He ignored the girl's scowl and prepared his stance. "Again."

Even though she had yet to come across a mirror in Dracula's castle, Agatha felt as if her appearance was already improving by the day. No longer was her skin a deathly pallor and blotched with a red rash, but her fatigue had lessened too. By no means was she cured, far from it, but at least she was one step in the right direction. Focus on the positives. The nun had to constantly remind herself of that.

A loud knock sounded against her bedroom door causing Agatha to jump a little in surprise. Her eyes fell to the door knob, anticipating for it to twist and push open. She didn't put it past Dracula to waltz inside without permission. He'd done it several times before. However, after a few moments had passed without the vampire gracing her with his unwelcome presence, she relaxed.

"Will you be joining me downstairs to eat, or shall I leave it by the door as usual?"

Accompanying him for dinner, as if he actually ate alongside her. She inhaled deeply, flattening out the creases in the dress he'd gifted her. It was rather lovely, but it did agitate her knowing he probably realized her fondness of it. Regardless, she hadn't much else to wear-thanks to him, so she had to make do.

"You truly make being a good host such a daunting task," the vampire continued when she refrained from responding. "I've opened by home to you, healed you, and yet, you still don't trust that my intentions aren't sinister." He paused, quickly adding. "At least, not to what you expect."

"Exactly where does one find trust with someone who has slaughtered countless innocent lives," Agatha retorted. "I don't expect you to see my reasoning behind my hesitation as you kill without a second thought."

"We do what we must to survive," Dracula stated. "Monster or not, human or creature, it's in our genetics to thrive by whatever means necessary. If I made you a vampire right now, I can assure you you'd give into your cravings within a second. Whether you feel guilty or not afterwards is no concern, but you would consume blood."

"I'd rather die," she frowned deeply.

"As you've made very, very clear," the vampire exhaled. "Anyway, if desired to kill you, you'd already be dead. So rather than acting like a broody hen sitting on a clutch of eggs, perhaps it would do you good to come join me by the fire. Being confined in a room for so long isn't good for one's sanity."

His mere existence was pushing her to the brink of insanity. Chewing on the inside of her cheek, Agatha's eyes fixed on the door. Something told her that he wasn't about to give in and leave her to her own devices. At some point, she'd have to really face him. Exhaling heavily, she stood up. Positive thoughts. Maybe she could use this to her advantage. A learning experience. Information. Clearing her throat, she forced a stoic expression.

"Fine," she exclaimed. "I suppose I'll join you."

"Ouch!"

A small drop of blood trickled from the knick on Agatha's thumb where she cut herself. She set the knife down, and examined the piece of wood she'd been whittling into a stake. Abraham strode forward and grabbed her hand, his brows knitting as his ever present frown deepened.

"You need to be more careful," he instructed. "A vampire would be able to smell this a mile away and you'd be killed before you even knew what hit you."

"It was an accident," Agatha insisted.

"Doesn't matter," the old man frowned. "You can't afford to make a mistake. Always be vigilant. Vampires are monsters, Agatha. They don't feel. They don't care. All you are is a meal to them. You must remember that!" He snatched her stake, his fingers trailing down the pointed wood. "Keep going," he muttered, handing it back to the girl. "You're looking if this would go through a human's chest."

"How did you learn to cook anyway?"

Agatha's eyes followed Dracula as he set a dish in front of her. At first glance, it appeared to be some sort of fowl, perhaps quail, along with root vegetables. She'd be lying if she didn't admit it smelled incredible. It wasn't until the vampire placed a crystal glass filled with a red liquid that the nun visibly stiffened.

"It's just red wine," Dracula chuckled, snorting softly. "Honestly, Agatha, I may be a 'brute' as you'd put it, but I'm not twisted enough to give you blood." There was a glint of mischievousness in his eyes. "Especially when it's a requirement in my diet."

"You didn't answer my question," Agatha said, lifting up the cup to swirl the liquid around. "Where did you learn to cook? And why?"

"I picked up many skill sets throughout the centuries," he admitted. "When you have a lot of time on your hands, why not take the opportunity. Besides," he smirked. "It comes in handy when I have guests over." He gave a nod towards her dish. "Go on, give it a taste."

Eyeing him warily, Agatha lifted up her fork and picked up some of the meat. Hesitantly, she placed it into her mouth. Throughout her decades of life, she hadn't ever tasted anything so delectable. She tried to ignore Dracula's wide grin as he watched her eat. He was a good cook, she'd give him that.

"Well?"

"I'm not dead yet, so I suppose you didn't poison me," she said, setting her utensil down. "Impressive for someone who only consumes blood."

"I do try my best," he smirked. "And if we are offering compliments, might I add that you are looking much more lively now. The fire really brings out the color in your cheeks."

Agatha almost choked on the wine she'd taken a sip of. Heat rose to her face as the vampire eyed her smugly from across the table knowing what he'd done. Pleasant conversations and Dracula didn't go hand in hand. Especially when he was attempting to flirt for her own embarrassment.

"You really lack the ability for romanticism despite your centuries of life," she countered, an argument not helping her cause. She should've just dropped it. Left his snide remark where it was. "You have as much charm as a decaying crow."

"Ah, your insults are enthralling," Dracula mused, clearly entertained by her disdain. "Go on, do continue."

She should've stayed in her room. Ignored him. Pretended he wasn't there. Hell, she should've died back in that rundown clinic. But here she was, sitting before the buffoon of a man-if one would even give him the dignity of calling him that. Anger began to bubble within her chest, her witty demeanor fighting the urge to leap over the table with the strength she clearly didn't have and stake him in the chest with her butter knife.

"You're a pig," Agatha growled. "A barbarian."

"Come on, Agatha, you and I both know you can be far more creative than that," he teased, making his way over to her side. "I've witnessed it before. Give me your best shot. That is," he paused. "If you still have it in you."

What happened next was a blurred memory, as if Agatha had blocked out the event that led up to it. The next thing she realized was that she was standing, her mouth against Dracula's as he pushed her back against the table. The force of it hurt and the nun knew she'd have a bruise later. But that didn't matter now.

Her arms wrapped around his neck as he lifted her up, the dining ware knocked to the floor. Shattered. Teeth grazing her bottom lip. Fingernails digging into his impenetrable skin. She couldn't breathe. She didn't want to. The fabric of her dress tore as he ripped it off like one does the wrapping of a present.

"Don't trust a vampire." Abraham's words echoed in her mind as she lay splayed across the table like some elegant feast, Dracula looming over her with dark, lustful eyes. "Never fall into their trap."

His words faded as the vampire pressed himself close, his forehead against Agatha's. Her body ached for him. Burned. And she was a victim to its demands. Perhaps later she'd regret this. But later wasn't now. She allowed her eyes to close, bare skin to bare skin, as she drowned in the passion that was desire.

[twilights-800-cats]

<< Allegiances | Chapter 26 | Chapter 27 | Chapter 28 | From the Beginning >>

Chapter 27

Tinystar opened his eyes, more exhausted than when he’d gone to sleep. He’d dragged himself into his nest far after moonhigh, when the sky was just starting to lighten. Sandstorm hadn’t stirred as he’d laid himself down, drained to his core, and shut his eyes. His dreams were fleeting and hard to catch, like a butterfly escaping a kit’s claws – but his anger… it boiled like greenleaf flame.

Mouth dry, Tinystar forced himself to wake. Sandstorm had left the nest, her scent lingering still. The bulk of the Clan didn’t know that he’d gone out last night. He had to project strength.

It’s all for revenge. He thought as he stretched, trying to force the sleepiness from his body. The more he thought about the meeting with Scorch last night, the more frantic energy filled him. His claws clutched his nest, some part of him pretending that the bedding was Scorch’s pelt. He’s going to drive us all out because of petty revenge!

Tinystar tried to force his fur to lie flat. It used to be Bluestar’s actions that caused his temper to flare – it didn’t help that her mentorship had nutured that part of him – but now it was Scorch. His own half-brother! A cat he’d looked up to as a kit, who’d tell him stories and come and visit Tinystar more than his own littermates!

He took a deep breath. It does no good to get worked up now, he thought. What’s happening is happening – there’s no changing it. If StarClan has pitted us against one another then I will do everything in my power to stop him.

Tinystar padded out of his den. Leaf-bare sunlight shone weakly down on the clearing, the cats in motion like flitting shadows in the gray dawn. No cat was panicking – it seemed as if no one knew he’d gone. Sandstorm was leading the kits off, all three bouncing around her and Stormpaw as they pushed through the gorse tunnel. Tawnypelt and Featherpaw followed.

Tinystar spotted Whitestorm with Mistypaw and Ashpaw near the camp walls. The two apprentices were patching the wall, weaving sticks in with paws and jaws to reinforce the camp’s defenses. Tinystar padded over to Whitestorm’s side, keeping an eye on the two. Ashpaw had a history of anger at Stonepaw – was he like that with Mistypaw?

“Everything is fine,” Whitestorm mewed under his breath, as if he could hear Tinystar’s thoughts. “They’re both focused on their task – I thought that would be best.”

“Thanks,” Tinystar agreed. Mistypaw was still distraught over the loss of her brother – she needed to keep her paws busy. He wasn’t sure if it would help Ashpaw, though. There might never be any way to make him see his denmates differently.

Tinystar blinked, putting his attention to the barrier itself. He imagined BloodClan rogues streaking through the forest and crashing into it with full force. He saw the barrier bending and swaying and breaking as a tide of BloodClan cats swarmed into the clearing. For a moment the quiet sounds of morning were replaced with the screaming of cats dying. Tinystar swallowed and shook away the vision.

And yet the gorse was waving for real.

Tinystar bristled, opening his jaws to call out warning – but only two shapes emerged. Two black-and-white shapes. Tinystar shut his jaws. It was Ravenpaw and Barley!

“Well, this is a surprise,” Whitestorm admitted.

Tinystar’s tail twitched. “Greetings, Ravenpaw. Barley.”

Barley, who lived in the barn at the edge of the territories, looked uncomfortable being around so many cats. Tinystar guessed that the loner had never been in the heart of the Clan’s territories before – he seemed alright with being just at the fringes. Ravenpaw, however, looked calm and comfortable, his eyes bright as he looked at Tinystar.

“We heard about what’s going on from a WindClan patrol,” Ravenpaw reported. “We set out as soon as we could – we want to help.”

Whitestorm frowned. “Admirable,” he admitted, “but is it really your place?”

Ravenpaw narrowed his eyes. “ThunderClan was my home. I might be a loner now, but part of me will always be a warrior.”

“I understand that,” Tinystar meowed. He looked to Barley. “But you? You have no reason to fight.”

Barley shuffled on his paws. Ravenpaw laid his tail on his friend’s back. “It’s all right,” the young loner mewed reassuringly. “Barley has some information for you, Tinystar. He thinks it might help.”

Tinystar glanced at Whitestorm, who shrugged and turned his attention back to the apprentices at the barrier. Tinystar waved his tail for the loners to follow and led the way to a shady spot across the camp. The ferns that screened the medicine cat’s den kept them from prying eyes, too.

Barley tucked his paws beneath him as he settled down. Ravenpaw sat on his haunches, his tail wrapped around his friend’s bulk. Tinystar stifled a yawn and sat, curling his tail around his paws, leaning in to listen. He had to admit that curiosity was pricking his pelt – there was very little that any cat in the forest knew about their long-time loner neighbor.

“A-Alright…” Barley took a deep breath. “Here goes.”

“I’m with you,” Ravenpaw assured.

Barley shot him a grateful glance, tinged with affection. Tinystar wondered briefly if the two toms were more than just barnmates.

“I was once part of BloodClan,” Barley announced.

Tinystar’s ears pricked in surprise. The soft-pelted loner looked nothing like the ragged, skinny, muscular creatures that made up BloodClan.

“It’s true,” Barley mewed, gauging Tinystar’s reaction. “I remember growing up in an alley… BloodClan territory took up half the Twolegplace, it seemed. It was just me and my mother – she taught me and my littermates how to hunt and fight. I don’t know where our father was. We had to fight for and save nearly every scrap we could find.”

Barley swallowed. “The Clans out here… you guys have queens and systems made to take care of kits. Everyone works together for their survivial – but there’s nothing like that in BloodClan. It’s every cat for themselves. Mothers teach their kits how to hunt and fight but once you’re old enough you’re on your own.”

Ravenpaw murmured something comforting to Barley, to settle the tremor in his voice. Barley rumbled back.

“It gets brutal and violent.” Barley’s eyes grew haunted and dark with memories. “BloodClan adults don’t usually challenge queens with kits but… when you come to a certain age it doesn’t matter if you still rest at your mother’s belly – you have claws and you have to use them. Cats take what they want – food, grimy puddles, other cats – it doesn’t ever end. That’s why I left.”

“I’m so sorry,” Tinystar mewed gently. “But there must be some sort of order – otherwise why have a leader at all?”

“There is order – if you can call it that,” Barley went on. “Whatever BloodClan was started for, I don’t think that’s what it is now. But there’s a leader. There’s an inner circle of cats who watch over parts of the territory and the groups that wander in it. Disputes are settled… in their own way. In the end, though, it’s still survival of the fittest. You could hunt in a party of cats you’d known since you left your mother but if you can’t contribute you’re gone.”

“Do you know how Scorch became leader?” The mention of his half-brother’s name kindled the anger in Tinystar again.

“I don’t know,” Barley admitted. “When I was part of BloodClan there was a cat named Scourge in charge. Scorch must have killed him for the position – that would be the only way all of BloodClan would follow him.”

Tinystar stiffened. His brother… a murderer? You’ve seen just how dangerous he is, a small voice whispered. He’s always been capable. You’ve just been naïve.

“Why would any cat want to be part of that?” Tinystar mewed hoarsely, trying to punch down the anger growing in him. He tried to imagine how BloodClan worked – fighting and starving constantly for every scrap. No security when you grew too old or too hurt to fight. No thanks for your work.

“When you’re in Twolegplace you’re either a kittypet, loner, or a BloodClan cat,” Barley admitted. “Loners don’t last long in BloodClan territory. At least kittypets can hide in their nests for the most part. But you’re either with BloodClan or against them. Absolute or nothing at all.”

Tinystar frowned. BloodClan sounded like an awful deal – but starvation and looming death made cats do desperate things. “There must be some weakness,” he guessed. “BloodClan outnumbers both WindClan and ThunderClan together. Anything will be helpful.”

“They’re fierce fighters and they rarely leave opponents alive,” Barley answered, sympathy in his mew. “And they follow Scorch out of fear but that doesn’t mean that most of them aren’t nurturing darkness in their own hearts. But… they do have a weakness.”

Tinystar leaned in close.

“They don’t believe in StarClan,” Barley stated.

Tinystar frowned. “How is that…?”

“A Clan without a code can exist, yeah – but is it really a Clan without StarClan?” Barley went on. “A Clan without a StarClan is missing something fundamental – faith. BloodClan runs on bloodlust and fearmongering – there’s no faith in anything more than that.”

Tinystar swallowed. “You’re right,” he breathed. “Without StarClan… without our ancestors… we wouldn’t have any of their boons. No medicine cats to heal us, no omens to warn us of danger…”

“No nine lives,” Ravenpaw finished meaningfully.

“No nine lives,” Tinystar repeated.

Scorch doesn’t have nine lives!

He swallowed. Somehow the thought had never occurred to him – a Clan that didn’t believe in StarClan? It seemed an impossible concept. Suddenly it felt like the task was somewhat easier – BloodClan was ruled through fear of Scorch. Eliminate Scorch and BloodClan would disperse. Yet that meant… eliminating Scorch.

My brother will have to die to save the Clans… Tinystar shuddered. There was still a part of him that dreaded the thought. Oh StarClan!

He swallowed again. “T-Thank you, Barley,” he rasped. “This is very helpful.”

“I hope so,” Barley purred.

Ravenpaw waved his tail. “Barley and I will be there, Tinystar. We’ll fight with you at Fourtrees.”

Tinystar frowned. “This is not your battle.”

“It is,” Barley mewed firmly, getting to his paws. The loner’s eyes were hard, and Tinystar wondered if he’d been taken far back in his memories, to his time with BloodClan. “If BloodClan takes over the forest it won’t take them long to find the barn. They’ll ravage it like they will the entire forest – and we won’t be able to escape. We might live on the outskirts but what happens in the forest affects us, too.”

“I’d shed blood for the Clans many times over,” Ravenpaw agreed. “Especially for ThunderClan.”

Gratitude swamped the fear and apprehension and anger welling within Tinystar now. He touched his nose to each of the loner’s foreheads, stretching to reach Barley’s round head.

“Thank you,” he forced himself to purr. “Thank you both.”

———————————————————-

Barley and Ravenpaw’s visit made Tinysar restless. After their departure – they stated they would stay with WindClan until the battle, to help them recover and prepare – Tinystar set off into the woods. He caught himself a thin mouse and ate it where it died, knowing his Clan was as full-fed as it could be in these lean times. Then he carried on to the training hollow.

The first batch of warriors out for training would be doubtless on to other tasks now, but the sandy hollow wouldn’t be empty until the battle with BloodClan. Even in the night hours there would be training going on, thanks to Graystripe and Oakheart’s schedule.

Tinystar picked his way up the ravine, following the trail to the sandy hollow. A flash of fur caught his eye – a patrol was heading his way. Tinystar raised his tail to greet Frostfur and Longtail as they mewed their own greetings and stopped before him.

“We’re glad we caught you,” Frostfur mewed. “We were patrolling Sunningrocks and we caught scent of ShadowClan and RiverClan across the river.”

“Still?”

Longtail nodded, his pale eyes flashing thoughtfully. “Seems like ShadowClan is hiding there. Wonder if BloodClan has taken the marshes? Maybe they’re trying to hang on to LionClan.”

“Foolish, if you ask me,” huffed Frostfur. “There just isn’t enough room for two Clans in one spot!”

Tinystar waved his tail. “Go get some fresh-kill,” he ordered. “Be ready for training.”

Longtail and Frostfur dipped their heads and headed for the ravine. Tinystar watched them disappear into the spindly, dry undergrowth. He knew the patrol to the Thunderpath would confirm what Tinystar and Cloudtail had discovered the night before – that BloodClan was in ShadowClan’s proper territory.

So LionClan hasn’t properly split? He thought, setting his paws back on the trail to the sandy hollow. Is Leopardstar really trying to hold them all together? How long can that last?

Reaching the sandy hollow, Tinystar settled himself out on the fringes of ThunderClan’s training area to let the warriors and apprentices have their proper space. Graystripe had Fernpaw and Snowpaw in one corner, while Sandstorm trained Willowpelt’s kittens in another. Cinderpelt was going over ThunderClan-style moves with Featherpaw, Stormpaw, and Tawnypelt. Off to another side, Dustpelt was sparring with Brightheart and Swiftfoot while Cloudtail watched.

Tinystar looked proudly at his Clanmates, all training their hardest. The sandy hollow was more full than he’d ever seen it. He flicked his tail to Graystripe, who put Fernpaw and Snowpaw into a little bout before plodding over to greet Tinystar.

“How are things?” Tinystar asked.

“Well!” Graystripe mewed proudly. “BloodClan is going to tremble in their fur when they see us.”

Tinystar purred. “I have to agree,” he admitted, turning his eyes over the training cats. “Everyone is fighting like a warrior – even the kits.”

As he said so, Sorrelkit and her siblings flew on Sandstorm, burying her in their pelts. Sandstorm’s tail lashed from beneath the kits’ onslaught and Tinystar had to hold back a purr of amusement at the sight. Sandstorm would never let him keep his pelt if he teased her about this – but then again, this was nothing to tease about.

“Excuse me,” Graystripe mewed. “I’ve got to talk to Fernpaw about her claw work.”

Tinystar nodded, letting the gray warrior go. Graystripe walked with a spring in his step he seemed to be lacking, and there was a happy twinkle in his eye. Was that because of being reunited with Silverstream? Tinystar pushed it away – he didn’t want to think about what might happen to his old friend if Silverstream went back to RiverClan at the end of it all.

Sandstorm pulled herself out of the kitten pile, sporting a decent scratch on her spine. She raised her tail to end the fighting.

“No claws, Rainkit!” she ordered.

“Sorry,” the gray tom mewed.

“Why not have claws?” Sorrelkit piped up. “BloodClan isn’t gonna keep their claws sheathed!”

Sandstorm fluffed up her neck fur. “No proper Clan cat trains with claws unsheathed!”

“Dappletail says ShadowClan does,” mewed Sootkit.

“We’re not ShadowClan!” Sandstorm stated firmly. “We’re ThunderClan, and claws are sheathed! When you three are apprentices I’ll pity your mentors!”

“But we want you to be our mentor!” Rainkit squealed.

“Yeah!” Sootkit clamored.

Sorrelkit stood up on her hind paws, swiping at their air with practiced strikes. “You can train all three of us, can’t you?”

Tinystar purred, his whiskers twitching in amusement.

Sandstorm looked up, her tail fluffing as she caught Tinystar’s eye. “Hold a moment, kits,” she meowed to the three bundles. “Tinystar is here.”

“Oh, wow!” Sootkit gasped.

Suddenly Tinystar was surrounded by the kits, all three bouncing up and down around him. Their fur was dusted with sand and their pelts were rumpled but none of them seemed the least bit tired by their training. Sandstorm touched her nose to Tinystar’s in greeting.

Tinystar leaned over his mate and ran his tongue along her scratch. Not deep, but the kits had managed to penetrate her leaf-bare thick fur. Sandstorm purred at the gesture.

“Tinystar! Tinystar!” called Rainkit. “Sandstorm can be our mentor, right?”

“All of us?” Sorrelkit added.

Tinystar looked down at the kits, his whiskers twitching. “She can only mentor one of you,” he said gently. “That way she can put all her energy into her apprentice properly.”

“Well, I want it to be me!” Sorrelkit decided, her tail standing straight up.

“What about me?” Rainkit huffed.

Sootkit fluffed his pelt. “Well, whatever – I want to be Tawnypelt’s apprentice.”

“We can’t be her apprentice!” Rainkit clamored. “She’s our sister!”

“So?” Sootkit’s little tail lashed. “She’s just as good a warrior as Sandstorm!”

Sorrelkit got down on her haunches. “Well, can Tawnypelt do this?” She pounced on her brother, and the two disappeared in a tangle of gray-and-tortoiseshell fur.

Rainkit watched, sighing. “Of course she could,” he muttered. “A pounce? Every cat can pounce…”

“They’re a pawful,” Tinystar decided, watching the tussle.

“You have no idea,” Sandstorm agreed, leaning against him a moment. “But their energy is admirable.”

Tinystar looked up at his mate. He could see the wistfulness in her eyes as she watched the kits practice their battle moves. He rubbed his chin against her shoulder. “If you want one of them as your apprentice, just ask.”

Sandstorm stiffened. “I… I suppose. I’d like Sorrelkit, I think. If things work out.”

Tinystar frowned. Was his mate still worried for Stonepaw? Did she hold out hope her apprentice would return?

But the look Sandstorm gave him was more intense than that. Sandstorm wasn’t worried about one lost apprentice – she was worried about the Clans as a whole. If BloodClan drove them out, the warrior code and the lives they built wouldn’t matter anymore. Mentor and apprentice would disappear, along with everything else.

“We’ll win,” he assured her quietly. “We have to.”

He let Sandstorm go and resume her training with the kits. The three followed after her eagerly, their tails up. They’d be ready for a good long sleep when they went back to the nursery – and when their apprenticeships began Tinystar could see them being some of the best warriors ThunderClan ever had.

Tinystar turned his attention to Swiftfoot and Brightheart. The two crippled warriors were facing Dustpelt – a formidable opponent in his own right. Dustpelt lunged across the sand, closing the distance between himself and Brightheart – but any hopes of tackling the “easier” of the two were dashed as Brightheart leaped back and Swiftfoot took her place.

Dustpelt crashed into Swiftfoot, who used the momentum to wrap his paws around Dustpelt’s neck. With a heave, Swiftfoot shoved Dustpelt’s face into the dust.

“Get off you lump!” Dustpelt hissed. “My mouth is full of sand!”

“Not until you surrender!” Brightheart crowed, her tail twitching.

Dustpelt wriggled more and then sagged. “Fine – fine! I surrender!”

Swiftfoot purred as he released Dustpelt from his grip. Dustpelt got back to his paws, looking dizzy. He shook his head to clear it and then the rest of himself to loosen the sand in his pelt. He looked between the two crippled warriors. “Didn’t see that coming, honestly,” he admitted. “Think you could teach me that?”

“We’ll teach you all,” Brightheart promised. Beside her, Swiftfoot scoffed, rolling his eyes. “There’s no reason we can’t all fight for our Clan.”

Tinystar made his way to Cloudtail’s side. “They’re doing so well,” he praised. “Swiftfoot especially.”

“I don’t know where he comes up with these moves,” Cloudtail admitted, her eyes flashing with admiration. “But they’re always astounding – and Brightheart is clever herself, too!”

Before them the three warriors got back into position for another bout. It wasn’t long before Dustpelt was on his belly again, begging for mercy – this time because of Brightheart’s snakelike movements. Cloudtail puffed out her chest.

Tinystar felt pride, too. All of his Clanmates were so skilled! Though his muscles itched to join in on the training – it felt like moons since he’d used his claws for anything but hunting – he turned to Cloudtail again.

“We should go and see Fiona,” he meowed.

Cloudtail stiffened. Tinystar knew that the previous night had taken a great toll on her emotionally. He was fully prepared for her to refuse – but she was slowly nodding in agreement. “We can’t keep her in the dark,” she murmured. “She needs to know what my father… what Scorch has become.”

Tinystar licked her between the ears. Cloudtail said a quick good-bye to her mates, promising to return swiftly. Then the two were off, their paws on the trail to Twolegplace.

———————————————————-

They traveled in silence through Tallpines and into Twolegplace, reaching Fiona’s nest just after sunhigh. There were plenty of kittypets out and about, lying on their bellies to relish the sunlight before it got too cold to enjoy it. They paid no mind to the two forest cats slinking along the bottoms of their fences.

“We shouldn’t tell her about last night,” Tinystar decided as they reached Fiona’s fence. Her scent clouded the air on the other side. “The rest of it is going to be hard enough as it is.”

“Yeah,” Cloudtail agreed. She gave a powerful leap and balanced on the top of the fence a moment before disappearing over the edge.

Tinystar followed, scrabbling a little to get over. His shorter height always made jumping a bit of a chore. He landed on all four paws in Fiona’s garden in time to see the pure white she-cat greeting her daughter with a purr, the bell on her collar tinkling gently.

“Cloudtail, it feels like seasons since we’ve seen each other!” Fiona fretted. “Don’t be a stranger!”

“Mother…” Cloudtail sighed, wincing as Fiona rasped her tongue along her thick pelt.

Fiona’s ears perked up as Tinystar came into view. “Tinyclaw! There you are – you look so thin! Are you eating properly? The cold must have driven off so much prey…”

Tinystar’s ear flicked at hearing his old name. He coughed awkwardly.

“Mother – he���s Tinystar now. He’s Clan leader!” Cloudtail pointed out.

Fiona’s ear flicked. “Tinystar…?” She tested the name on her tongue, looking slightly cross. “You Clan cats go through names quicker than a kitten shreds a toy, I swear!”

The pretty white she-cat shook her head. Then, she sighed, her big blue eyes sympathetic. “That must mean that Tigerstar has passed? I’m so sorry, Tinystar.”

Tinystar nodded. “He did, yes,” he reported. “Things have been so busy, I’m sorry we haven’t been able to come to give you proper updates.”

Fiona flicked her tail. “Well it’s no wonder – you’re leader now! Doubtless you’ve got many responsibilities! You won’t always be able to make time to visit.” Though the thought clearly made her sad, she put on a brave face. Tinystar felt a prickle of admiration for the kittypet queen, who almost always refuted Clan perceptions of how a kittypet ought to behave.

“I haven’t heard those dogs in a while, either,” Fiona breathed. “They must have moved on.”

In a way, Tinystar thought. He didn’t have time to go through the entire story, so he simply nodded.

“Well then – you’re leader now and everything seems to be all right in the forest, so why do you both look like someone’s trying to chew your hind legs?” Fiona demanded. She looked between her kit and her friend. “What’s happening out there?”

Tinystar swallowed. Cloudtail’s jaws seemed firmly shut, unwilling to tell her mother what was happening. So it fell to Tinystar to tell her everything he was willing to – about Rusty and Scorch, about BloodClan, and about the attack in two dawns’ time.

Fiona let out a wail.

“I knew it!” she cried. “I knew something was going on with him and those nasty cats!” She slumped against Cloudtail. “How could he do this? I kept warning him they were bad news and now…”

“I don’t know.” Tinystar moved to comfort her, resting his tail against her flank. “I don’t think Scorch was ever the cat we thought we knew, Fiona.” Cloudtail murmured her agreement, her eyes pools of sorrow.

“I loved him, Tinystar,” Fiona whimpered. “I loved him so much…”

“I know.”

Fiona let herself shake for a moment longer before she straightened up. She ran a trembling paw along her whiskers to straighten them, as if that would calm her. She looked between Cloudtail and Tinystar.

“Please,” she mewed quietly, “be careful, the both of you. That BloodClan is ruthless and evil and they never stop until they have what they want.”

“We’ll win,” Cloudtail meowed confidently. She butted her head against her mother’s shoulder. “We always do!”

Fiona didn’t look totally reassured – she stared right into Tinystar’s eyes, and the small black tom realized he knew what the kittypet was thinking.

We always seem to make it out… but not without losing cats along the way.

[thetravelerwrites]

Setting the Record Straight

Rating: General Audiences Fandom: 魔法使���の嫁 | Mahou Tsukai no Yome | The Ancient Magus Bride Characters: Elias Ainsworth, Hatori Chise, Ruth, Silkie, Alice Words:3985

Chise gets annoyed by people asking if she's afraid of Elias and explains exactly why she's not. Please Leave feedback.

A sharp knock at the door interrupted their afternoon tea. Elias turned his head, but Chise shot up and was at the door before he could speak.

"Alice!" He heard Chise say in surprise. "Hi, what brings you by?"

Elias stood, allowing Silver to collect their dishes, and followed Chise out into the hall. Ruth padded after him.

"Hey there," Alice said cheerfully, standing on the porch of the Ainsworth residence. She held up a gift bag. "I heard it was your birthday not too long ago. I stopped by to give you this."

Chise stepped back to give her room to enter. "Oh,” She said softly. "You didn't have to buy me a gift."

Alice laughed as she stepped inside. "Don't worry, I didn't buy it. It's a hand-me-down. I got a new one, so I thought you like to have this one. It still works great, I just don't need two." She looked up at Elias and chuckled. "That is, if your jailer here is allowing contraband."

"Die," Elias said gruffly.

Alice stepped past him, flipping her hair, and made for the sitting room without invitation. Chise looked at Elias questioningly.

"It's fine," Elias said. "I'll be in the study."

She smiled and nodded, following Alice with Ruth on her heels. The door closed behind them with a snap.

Sighing, he made for the study but stopped when he realized he'd left the book he was reading on the kitchen table and doubled back for it.

He could hear the voices of the two young women muffled through the door and decided not to intrude, but hearing his own name made him stop and lean against the wall, listening. He had a vague sense that perhaps this was a private conversation, but curiosity got the better of him.

"I doubt the bonehead would give you one of these," Alice said haughtily.

"I don't think Elias even knows what it is," Chise said, laughing softly. "He's not too familiar with modern technology; at least, not that I've seen. He doesn't even own a radio or a landline phone."

"I don't know what kind of music you like, but I have pretty eclectic tastes, so I put a mix of everything on there. If there's anything you like particularly, I can replace the songs you don't like with more of the kind you do."

"Thanks, Alice, this is really nice," Chise replied.

"So what did Elias get you for your birthday?"

"He saved my life. That's gift enough for me."

"You mean from the freak?"

"Cartaphilus isn't a freak, Alice. He was just in a lot of pain. Pain can make people do terrible things."

There was a silence, during which time Elias remembered a few terrible things he'd done while he had been in pain. He hadn't recognized it as pain at the time because it wasn't physical; it was inside his chest and stomach and gnawed at him as though trying to eat it's way out of his body.

It wasn't until after he recovered Chise and had a long talk with her that he realized the pain he felt in her absence was emotional. He was experiencing loss, grief, and guilt: three emotions with which he had been previously unfamiliar because he'd never felt them before. He was hoping now that he knew what they were, he'd be able to react better in the future should such feelings arise again, though he dearly hoped that they never would.

He had heard such feelings could cause a person to die. Before, he didn’t believe such a thing could be possible, but now he was absolutely certain it was true. If Chise left again never to return, if she were to die, could he survive that? He wasn’t sure. And even if he did survive, he would never be the same. One day of rejection was enough to destroy what humanity he possessed and reverted him back to a mindless monster, lost and devastated. If she were gone forever? If he never saw her face or heard her voice again? He feared what he might become.

Chise’s soft laughter brought him back to his senses. It was sometimes difficult to catch the undercurrent of a conversation if he couldn't see the faces of those speaking, so he melted into the wall and shimmied under the door to find a shadow within the sitting room to hide in. He caught Silver's disapproving stare as he slipped under, but ignored it.

Alice was sitting in the chair closest to the door and Chise was on the couch with Ruth's head in her lap. There was a small, white, rectangular device with a accompanying cords sitting on the coffee table. This must have been Alice's gift. Chise was right: he had no idea what that was.

"I still can't get over seeing Ainsworth turn into that huge... thing," Alice began again.

Chise didn't respond, and Elias wondered what she was thinking. Her face was impassive.

"I mean, I'd never admit this to anyone but you, but that guy scares me when he goes all beast-mode. Weren't you scared?"

"Yes, I was," Chise said, and Elias felt deep sinking in his gut. Chise always swore he didn't frighten her, but deep down he always felt that he must. How could he not? Could she have been lying? Why? To spare his feelings? She was kind enough to do so, but the thought that he truly did frighten her made him feel... he didn't know. Disappointed? No, that wasn't strong enough. Disheartened? Disconcerted? Some sort of word with the letter D in it.

"I wasn't scared of Elias, though," Chise clarified a second later, and the heaviness Elias felt evaporated. He took a breath, not realizing he hadn't been breathing.

"I was scared of the situation. I was afraid to lose Elias or Ruth, or Stella, or you. I was afraid Cartaphilus or Ashen Eye would kill one of you. I was afraid I would fail and I wouldn't be able to fix the damage I had caused. There was a lot fear and anxiety bouncing around in my head, but none of it was because of Elias."

She paused, and a shadow passed across her face, barely discernible, gone in an instant. Elias couldn’t say what it meant, but it caused an unpleasant prickling sensation in him.

She took a breath and smiled. "I know who and what Elias is. I know he can take on may forms. None of them scare me. It never has."

"Really?" Alice asked in disbelief. "You're not scared of him? Not at all?"

Suddenly, Chise's voice rose in exasperation. "Why is that so hard to believe?" She asked, throwing up her hands. "Do you know how tired I am of people asking me that, especially him?"

There was a stunned silence. Alice had backed away a little. Ruth even seemed surprised.

Chise sighed and held up her hands placatingly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap. Look, let me tell you a story, alright?"

"Okay," Alice said slowly.

Chise closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "When I was eight, I was sent to an orphanage for girls in a small town outside of Okayama. By that age, I was used to doing things by myself, so I just got on with it. No one took enough notice of me to tell me what to do, so there was no need to ask permission, I just did what I needed to do. It was enough to go on with, and I survived it fairly well.” Her eyes went flat with introspection. “I think that’s why I’m so bad at letting people help me. I’m so used to being on my own and doing for myself that it just doesn’t occur to me to ask for help most of the time. I’m still getting used to that.”

“I totally get that,” Alice said. “My parents were blitzed out of the minds most of the time, so I was pretty much a street kid. I did whatever I wanted, as long as wasn’t hassled too much. A kid alone on the street is pretty much a target for every lowlife looking to take advantage. I learned to use a knife to my advantage pretty early on.”

Chise listened sympathetically in silence and waited as if expecting Alice to expand upon her story. Instead, Alice motioned for Chise to continue.

"On my first day of school in the new town, I left the orphanage and walked to school alone. To get there, you had to pass the town center. There was a big ornamental fountain right in the middle, and sitting on it was a huge red creature the size of a double-decker bus. No one else could see it; they passed it by like it wasn’t a giant nightmare looming over all of their heads. Oblivious.

“The… thing, whatever it was, was made up of nothing but tentacles, teeth, and eyeballs. Now, I was used to seeing weird things all the time and I'd gotten used to living in a constant state of anxiousness, but this was the biggest, creepiest thing I'd ever seen. It terrified me more than anything else had up to that point. I still have nightmares about it.

“I tried to ignore it, but somehow it realized I could see it and it began to follow me. It followed me to school and sat outside my classroom window, making obscene faces at me. It followed me back to the home and sat outside my bedroom window, licking the glass. It followed me for three months."

"Jesus," Alice said in an undertone.

Chise's face was dark and pained. "It constantly told me it was going to steal me away and drink my blood. It told me all the terrible things it wanted to do to me. It delighted in seeing how scared I was. It told me that as soon as I let my guard down, it would get me, and then it would lash out at me. It’s tentacles were apparently covered in barbs, because it left cuts and scratches all over me. I stopped sleeping. I stole a knife and hid it under my pillow. I kept arriving at school and back home covering in cuts and bruises. People thought I was insane and hurting myself. They didn't believe that there was this awful thing hunting me and hurting me. No one listened.

"One night, I was so tired that I couldn't stop myself and I fell asleep. I woke up because I felt a pain in my leg and when I opened my eyes, I realized that thing had managed to get the window open and was dragging me outside by my ankle. My leg was cut wide open and bleeding everywhere. I used the knife to cut at it and it let go and disappeared. The caretakers saw me with a knife in my hand and a huge gash in my leg and assumed I had done it to myself. It was the first and only time I ever threw a real screaming fit. I cried and yelled and shouted and told the caretakers that it would kill me. I told them that if they didn’t send me far away, I would run away myself. They thought I had lost mind.”

"Did they move you, though?" Alice asked.

"Oh, yes," Chise replied flatly. "To a mental asylum. The doctors there diagnosed me with paranoid depressive schizo-affective disorder with a tendency toward self harm. They deemed me a danger to myself and others and I was kept in a locked room by myself for six months."

"Holy shit," Alice breathed. Elias was equally shocked.

"Yeah." Chise was silent for a moment. "It wasn't as bad as you might think, though. The asylum had iron bars on the window, which I didn't know at the time was keeping the bad things out. It was the first time in my life I didn't see things that other people couldn't. Being alone for once was kind of nice. There was no one telling me how delicious I was. There were no creatures trying to scare me. It was quiet, but it was a peaceful quiet. I thought maybe I was actually crazy and that being at the asylum was making me better. But then they released me, and all the bad things came back. The medicine they gave me didn't help. If anything, it made me feel more crazy.

"But you know what the worst part of that story is?" Chise asked Alice, who shook her head. "That tentacle creature was not unique. It stands out in my head because it stalked me for so long, but there have been many monsters like it trying to hurt me my whole life. Some of them succeeded, and some of them weren't even fae. Humans can be just as monstrous as the monsters."

Her eyes were dark, and Alice nodded knowingly. Elias felt disquieted. Chise often talked about her past experiences with fae creatures but was far less open about her experiences with other humans. Elias hadn't thought much about it before, but now he wondered just how much she had suffered at the hands of her own people.

"When I first saw Elias, was I surprised? Yes, of course," Chise admitted. "But I wasn't scared. Compared to that red monstrosity that terrorized me outside of Okayama, Elias was practically cuddly."

Alice snorted at the description. "Cuddly isn't the word I would use to describe Ainsworth."

"You don't know him," Chise blurted out, then bit her lip. Alice smirked at her and narrowed her eyes.

"You have weird taste," Alice said.

"Hey," Ruth retorted, lifting his head off of the couch next to Chise. She patted him down.

"No, she's right," Chise said with a laugh. "But weird isn't the same as wrong."

"I suppose that's true," Alice admitted. She stood up and stretched.

"Leaving already?" Chise asked, a little disappointed.

"Yeah, sorry," Alice said. "Renfred and I are running a new test at the college tomorrow and I gotta be up early. I just wanted to make sure you got your gift. Maybe someday soon I can take you out to lunch, though."

Chise smiled in return. "That sounds nice."

Elias used the distraction of Alice's departure to quickly jump through the shadows to his study. He rematerialized and sat at his desk, attempting to look busy and preoccupied.

He heard a knock at the door.

"Come in," he called.

Chise opened the door and Ruth followed her inside.

Elias attempted to be nonchalant. "How was your visit with Renfred's apprentice?"

"She has a name, Elias," Chise said, her hand on her hips. She wore a frown. "You know, it's rude to eavesdrop on other people's conversations."

Elias sucked in a breath. So she had known he was there. She was becoming very perceptive to him, not always to his benefit.

"My apologies," he said. No point in denying it. "I was curious." He tried changing the subject. "What gift did she give you?"

"Oh." Chise held up the white rectangle. "It's an MP3 player."

"A what?" He asked, baffled.

"A music player," she clarified. The white cord attached to the rectangle branched into two separate cords, at the ends of which sat little round objects. "You select a song you'd like to hear," she said, demonstrating. He saw a small screen flip through song titles. "And then the music plays through the earphones." She held one up for him, but then faltered. "Uhh..."

"Yes?"

"Do you have ears?"

That was an interesting question. Did he? "I am obviously capable of perceiving sound, though I am not sure from where."

She frowned again. "Bend down."

He obliged her, and she held out her fingers next to where he assumed he might have ears were he human, and snapped them. "Is that louder than normal?"

"No, but I think you're on to something. Try again."

After some trial and error, they determined he best perceived sound just behind and slightly above the bone that made up his lower mandible. There was a shadowy hollow there than may have actually been an ear canal. She held an ear bud there and pressed play.

Elias listened for a moment and said, "Ah, I see."

Chise smiled and put the other bud in her ear, and they listened to the song together.

"What a pleasant tune," Elias said as the song ended. "This was a thoughtful gift."

"Yes," Chise agreed. "I like it very much.”

Elias straightened as Chise put the music device in her pocket. Chise turned to leave Elias to his work when he stopped her.

“Chise,” He began slowly. “Is what you told Alice true? About my monstrous forms never frightening you?”

Chise sighed in frustration. “Again? How many times do I have to say it before you believe me?”

“At one point, you seemed to hesitate. Why?”

Chise was silent, and Elias thought she might deny it. She looked down at the floor. Ruth nudged her hand and gave her a pointed look. She sighed again.

“Look, I want to be as honest with you as I can be,” She began. “The truth is, your forms don’t scare me. The fact that you used to eat humans doesn’t scare me. The fact that you’re bigger and stronger and more powerful than me doesn’t scare me. The fact that if you wanted to, you could devour me in three bites has never bothered me at all.”

“But?”

She paused and sucked in a long, shaky breath. “But you did scare me once. You scare me when you do things you think are rational, when you act in a way that puts others at risk because you want to help me.”

“You’re referring to what happened with Stella,” Elias said.

“Yes,” Chise said, still avoiding his eye. “You really scared me then, Elias.”

“I know,” He replied mournfully. “And I am truly sorry. I did not understand then what I stood to lose. I understand now.” He grew thoughtful and said, “When you confronted me, you said you thought I was different. You cried. I didn’t understand what you meant.”

Chise did look at him then. “The fae treat humans like they’re disposable. Like tools to be used until they’re no longer valuable and then tossed away. I had thought, because you were part human, that you would value human life more than other fae did. I was… disappointed to learn that I was wrong.”

Now it was Elias who failed to meet Chise’s eye. He hung his head, feeling guilty. There was another feeling there, one he couldn’t put a name to.

“You don’t have to love every human out there, Elias. You don’t even have to like any of them. But people are not expendable. You can’t use them with no regard to how it will effect them or the people in their lives. My life is not worth more than Stella’s, or any other human being, just because you care more about me and less about them.”

Elias was unsure he understood this. Chise was infinitely more important to him than any other human. He would gladly sacrifice every life on Earth if it meant saving hers, fae and human alike. Was that wrong? He didn’t understand how.

“What if you had succeeded?” Chise continued. “What if you had transferred the curse to Stella and she died in my place? Can you imagine how her family would feel if she never came home?”

“I’m afraid I cannot,” He replied.

“Don’t you remember how you felt when I left you and you didn’t know if I’d come back?”

“Yes, I felt…” Elias thought for a moment. The pain he felt when she left surfaced again and he struggle to put it into words. Cold was inadequate. So was lonely. It took him several minutes of reflection before he finally decided on a word that felt appropriate.

“Broken.”

Chise’s eyes widened and her lips parted. Whatever she was expecting him to say, it wasn’t that. After a moment, though, she got back on track.

“Don’t you think that’s how her family would have felt? Losing a child is devastating for most parents. If you had gone through with it, you wouldn’t only have killed her, but you would have broken her entire family as well. Some people can’t live with that kind of loss. My mother couldn’t. I barely could. Don’t you realize that?”

He hadn’t. Elias had not even taken Stella’s family into consideration in his single-minded fervor to complete the ritual. His jaws opened in surprise as sudden understanding filled his mind.

“I see,” He said in a wondering tone. “I see.”

“Do you?” She asked him. She took his face in her hands and made him look her in the eye. “Do you really see?”

“Yes, I believe I do. Loss is a terrible thing to endure. It is not a feeling I would wish upon another.” He huffed unhappily. “Is this what it is to empathize?”

Chise nodded.

“This lesson in human behavior was certainly hard-learned.” He replied.

“Yes,” She agreed. “It’s one I wish I had taught you sooner.”

Elias sighed. “I am trying, Chise,” He said plaintively. “I’m trying to learn, even though it is difficult for me to grasp at times.”

“I know you are, Elias. I wouldn’t be here otherwise. If I thought you couldn’t learn, I’d never be able to stay with you.”

“I know.” He leaned his long skull against her forehead. “Believe me, I never wish to lose you again. I need you to help me understand so that I can do better. If you are willing to be patient with me, I shall endeavor to try harder.”

She sighed and smiled, planting a soft peck on the ridge above his nose. “That’s all I can ask for.”

“Chise,” He said, pulling back to look at her better. “I feel an emotion that I cannot identify. I’ve felt it since that day when you discovered my plan and ran from me, when you cried and struck me. Can you help me understand?”

“Yes,” She replied earnestly. “What does it feel like?”

“Guilt, but stronger. A cold knot in my stomach that makes me anxious and sets my nerves on edge. But at the same time, it makes me sad. Do you know what it might be?”

She considered him, hanging his head like a berated dog and not looking at her.

“I’m not completely sure, but I think it might be… shame.”

Elias straightened and looked down at her, processing the information. “Yes. I believe you’re correct,” He said quietly. “I am ashamed.”

“That’s good,” Chise said encouragingly.

“It is?”

“Yes. It means you truly understand your mistake and are capable of learning from it. That’s a good step going forward.”

“How do I make this awful feeling go away?” He asked a little desperately. “It is most distressing.”

“Maybe you could do something nice for Stella,” She offered. “Invite her for tea, or even go with me the next time I visit her family.”

Elias nodded. “Both are fine ideas. I will do that.”

“Good,” She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him tight. He draped his arms over her shoulders in return, nuzzling her head with his snout, careful not to snag his teeth on her skin.

From the circle of his arms, she looked up at him with her wide, lovely eyes. “Would you like to listen to some music with me?”

“Nothing would please me more,” Elias responded. “After, I’d like to hear more about your childhood, if that’s all right.”

“Sure,” She said, taking his hand and leading him back to the sitting room.

Since my work is no longer searchable, please do me a favor and reblog this story if you enjoyed it. Help me reach a wider audience! To help me continue creating, please consider buying me a Kofi, becoming a Patron, or donating directly to my PayPal!

Thanks for reading!

My Masterlist

The Exophilia Creator’s Masterlist

[fantroll-purgatory]

@sodixm

Planet: Alternia

Name: Kaklin Halwyn (Kaklin is a nonsense word that seemed to fit them, Halwyn is Welsh for salt)

I do wonder why you chose salt as the name theme to carry through everything. Is it because of the fact that they’re interested in cooking? I think I want to give her a more focused theme on Cooking/the things that come with cooking. 

That said, I think a good name for him might be Quirin, from Quirinalia, the last day of the God Fornax’s Feasts. And Gavius, from a well known ancient Gourmet and lover of food. 

Quirin Gavius. 

Age: 9 Solar Sweeps

Strife Specibus: rapierKind, which is equipped generally with “The Frogsticker”, which they use for obviously, sticking frogs. And then cooking and eating them.

I understand why you’d want a cool sword, but rapiers aren’t really used in hinting or any kind. I think going with a spear here might be a better idea. Frogs are typically hunted with spears. As an added bonus, Quirinus is the deity of spears, so it’s Thematically Appropriate. It’s also a lot easier to prop a spear up over a fire pit than a rapier. 

Fetch Modus: the Endurance Modus (to retrieve an item, they have to endure a jolt of pain coursing through their body that is proportional to how much the item is important to them. The more important it is, the more it hurts)

That’s concerning! While it’s an interesting idea, I don’t know that it fits the character well. Perhaps it could be a ‘Recipe Book’ instead and they’re only allowed to withdraw items if they come in combinations that can be used together. (Example: If he wanted to use a salt shaker, he’d also have to take out a pepper shaker. If he wanted to take out a pie crust, he’d also have to take out some berries and a pie tin.) 

Blood color: #00248f (Blue-blood)

This isn’t the biggest change in the world, but I am tempted to move her down to teal- if only because if her goal is to become the Empress’ personal chef, a teal is more likely to hold that role than someone like an indigo. And even if he has some hesitant feelings about the hemospectrum, indigo bloods have a somewhat adversarial relationship with seadwellers. So, #088487.

Symbol and meaning: The alchemical sign for salt! (Circle with a line through it one, there are multiple different ones lmao,,)

I think Fornax is a better fit! The furnace, named after the goddess of ovens, who people prayed to for Good Cooking. 

Trolltag: gypsumConviviality (I’m thinking of changing it, any suggestions?)

maybe convivialCuisine, I liked the use of conviviality to communicate Friendliness but gypsum was a bit of an odd choice. 

Quirk: th3y sp3ak grammar-wis3 pr3tty similarly 2 rOxy??? But with 3’s and O’s and what3v3r lmaO (O looks like their sign, 3 because they have a fondness for the number, and because salt is the third component in the alchemical trinity)

Because I switched up the sign, I’d recommend capitalizing A’s and maybe using 9′s in the place of g’s (because of Fornacalia would last 9 days). 

Special Abilities (if any): Not really an ability, but I like to think that most blue-bloods are strong and beefy, like the Zahaks, and so Kaklin is very strange for being scrawny and weak)

Most highbloods are indeed strong, but the Zahhaks are really a special case! They’re really, freakishly strong. However, it is common for all bluebloods (I think from Terez-Equius all count as blueblooods) to be unaware of their own strength. 

That said, is there a reason why you want them to be scrawny and weak? Is there a thematic or story purpose? Is that why he turned to cooking and made that a career goal instead of doing something higher ranked or military? What caused this weakness? 

Lusus: Giant salt golem! (I really hope this is okay? I mean I don’t see mythical or non-animal lusii a lot, so I kinda drew what was okay or not from Sollux’s Bicyclops lusus!)

Using mythical lusii is definitely okay, but a Golem is kind of a bad choice for this in particular, considering they’re less General Mythical Creatures and more ‘important parts of Jewish mythos with significant meaning’. Maybe you should go with a Harpy, since they’re known in myth to steal food. we know creatures with humanoid torsos can exist because of Equius’ lusus, and Teal is right in the appropriate range for bird-based lusii. 

Personality:  Kaklin is very lonely because they live far away from most of other trolls. Because of this, whenever they make a friend, online or off, they are very clingy. They will constantly talk to people, but also constantly put off talking to people, because of the fear that they’ll be annoying or say something wrong. At heart, they just want to be liked. In general, they tend to be chipper, loud, and very anxious!

I do like the idea of that being a kind of nervous and clingy person. Maybe they try to impress others with their cooking skills a lot? Something else I’d recommend is maybe making her a liiiittle bit of a fairweather friend. Like, when they can’t take the heat, they do indeed get out of the kitchen, because of their anxiety. 

Hemospectrum Views: Kaklin has what I like to call “highblood guilt”. They feel bad because they’re in a pretty high up position on the spectrum, and so will wrongly try to never bring the topic of blood up at all ever around lowbloods ever at all.  For highbloods, Kaklin will try to avoid higher-blooded trolls, but when they have to, will toady because they know that highbloods have power and could kill them.

This makes his long-term goal kind of curious. Why does he want to work directly for the empress if he wants to avoid higher-blooded trolls? Is she trying to do it for safety and protection? How does she justify this if someone lower on the spectrum asks about it?

Interests: Kaklin likes cooking. Like, REALLY likes cooking. It is one of the very few things they’re good at naturally. When they’re bored? Bake. When they’re sad? Sautee. When they’re calm? Cook! They also enjoy watching movies sweeps and sweeps old, going rock climbing on the salt cliffs near their home, and surprisingly, discussing philosophy with their lusus, which grunts in response.

All really good. Maybe the lusus can do a little more squawking philosophy of their own, now, though. (; 

Title: Kaklin actually never played Sburb, but I was thinking a Page, maybe of Void?

I honestly think Seer of Blood might be a better title. It’s a little on the nose with what it’s trying to teach them, but… Getting him to understand the ties that bind people and all that is a pretty important goal! 

Land: No ideas, haha.

If she never plays Sburb, it might not matter so much to figure out. Mostly because The Land is most important in the context of how the Game wants them to shape and grow. Something with them facing anxiety and confronting loneliness might be good, though. 

Dream Planet: Probably would be Prospit.

Gender: Trigender! Comfortable with he/they/she.

Life Goal: To become the Condesce’s Personal Chef™

On to the design!

Head: I made their horns match their symbol. Her hair is mostly the same, but I gave it a few more fwoopy bits for more dimension and also to potentially resemble wings or a jagged surface. I gave her some more anxious looking eyes. 

Body: I made his top like a kind of. Vaguely chef-coaty t-shirt? And I gave her some hiking boots. 

Thank you so much for your time!!!!!

Thank you for sharing!

-CD

[sapphicalexaandra]

Beautiful Mess (1/4)

Pairing: Jace/Alec

Rating: E (eventually, this particular chapter is T)

Summary: After Jace is set free from his dark parabatai-like bond with Jonathan Morgenstern, he has a hard time dealing with the aftermath. It's clear to him what he wants, but is he worthy of it?

Notes: Merry Chritmas and Happy Holidays! This is my contribution to the Jalec Secret Santa, and it is for @myltzi !! I tried weaving in all your prompts, which totally fit my preferences too, so it was a pleasure doing them and I really really hope you like the result! :D The fic has in total three chapters plus an epilogue, and i’ll be posting them once a day; more information on ao3. 

Act I: Reborn

When the world shakes us Trying to take us out of line

Being reborn happened in the form of a sword to the heart.

Jace didn’t remember much, only that his consciousness, after a literal flame had burned him from the inside out in an excruciatingly painful manner, had suddenly cleared – no more clouds warping his mind into thinking that the bond he had believed to be good and pure was instead bad and twisted. And he could see the battle raging all around him for what it was, with him on the side of…evil. Clary stood in front of him, a burning, glorious sword in hand, and he had no more energy to keep himself upright.

But something stopped his fall. Jace felt someone catching him from behind, slowly easing him onto the ground. And he didn’t need to see to know who it was, because he could feel him. In those first few moments of new life – because it truly felt like just then he was coming back to life, and not when the angel Raziel had risen him from the dead many weeks earlier – everything that had been unreachable to him before was back.

Alec. The real bond that he had chosen for himself. The right soul tied to his, no longer hidden under layers upon layers of dark magic.

Alec was hugging him to his chest, holding on with his chin laid on Jace’s head, his body shaking so imperceptibly that Jace doubted anyone else could notice it…and Jace couldn’t help but reach for Alec’s hands almost desperately, squeezing as hard as his own battered body would let him.

Curse the day someone had drove a wedge between them, making Jace forget everything that Alec meant to him. Curse that demon not even to hell, but to a place of complete non-existence!

That demon, however, had already escaped; the battle was over, and people had started to come closer to the parabatai pair, surrounding them with looks varying from pitiful to happy.

Clary, most of all, was still there, the sword having vanished from her hands, and she was silently crying with a smile on her face. For some reason, Jace felt sick just looking at her; thinking, remembering all that time, during his...swaying, when he had been with her as that same wrong person. This was all wrong, and Jace couldn’t do more than merely nod at her, hoping that it’d be enough to convey his gratitude…before he finally closed his eyes to better bury himself into his parabatai’s embrace.

Fear of tomorrow Feelings we borrow for a time

After weeks (and weeks), they had finally tracked down Jonathan Morgenstern and his army, managing to engage them in a battle…and Alec knew that he should’ve been focused on defeating that despicable evil creature who had taken away his parabatai from him, but all he cared about was that he was closer than he’d been to Jace ever since he had confronted him in a dark alley; when he had found out that Jace was still himself under the compulsion that had drove him towards Jonathan’s side.

(When he thought back to how Jace’s cutting words and violent threats had still not made him able to kill or even just harm his own parabatai, Alec was still torn about whether to cry or to smile.)  

A scream was stuck in Alec’s throat anyway, as he predicted Clary’s move before it actually happened. DON’T DO IT, he wanted to yell at her…but if he didn’t believe in his parabatai’s inherent goodness, then why was he even there?

They had figured out a way to save Jace: the sword named Glorious, granted to them by the angel Raziel, had the power to burn away the evil from the inside. And if there was enough good left in the person it was used against – Jace, in this case – he’d be able to live as himself again, free from any demonic influence.  

As the sword was pulled out of Jace’s body and Jace screamed, starting to fall, Alec caught him before he could even think about it…and the fact that Jace was clearly alive and warm in his arms made Alec ashamed of doubting him even for one second - of course, there would always be more than enough good left in Jace.

And, right then, the surge of life that, like the most welcomed of floods, sparked back into the parabatai bond – that had been dreadfully silent the entire time of Jace’s...departure – was another incontrovertible proof that Jace was back.

But, as he held onto Jace unable to stifle the tremor in his body, Alec couldn’t feel the relief; he felt only tired, that they kept losing each other, or almost dying, or that the bond kept being weakened or twisted in the first place…

Closing his eyes, Alec pressed a lingering kiss on Jace’s forehead, and he couldn’t care less what the people surrounding them, or Jace himself, would think. He would not repress his emotions any longer, or pretend that he could ever want to be anywhere else but at Jace’s side. He’d had enough.

And hell would rain on whoever took Jace away from him again.

Water so deep, how do we breathe? How do we climb?

When he woke up again, Jace found himself on a bed in the Institute infirmary.

Immediately, he wished he was anywhere but there, because he could already feel that if he saw anyone, he would crumble in on himself. After everything he had done, not only recently, but all his life…how could they bring him here?

And seeing Alec asleep on a chair next to his bed didn’t help at all; Jace felt his throat close, hot tears starting to fall from his face before he could even blink once.

“You’re awake.”

The whisper made him jump while Alec didn’t even stir, and only then did Jace realize that Izzy was on his other side. As soon as he did, he shot a hand up to his face to try and cover the evidence.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Jace could hear the tears in Izzy’s voice as well. A moment later, he felt a hand covering the one he had kept on the bed, and he had to stop himself from snatching it away. “You’re home now. It’ll be okay.”

Oh, how wrong she was…but he didn’t have it in him to tell her.  

A few minutes passed before he could breathe regularly again, and he removed his hand to finally look at Izzy. She smiled wobbly at him. He couldn’t move a muscle.

“How – how can you even look at me?” he croaked.

Her expression was set as she answered him, “That wasn’t you.”

“It was me. I remember everything, I-”

“That wasn’t you.”

The deep, groggy voice startled both of them, and they turned around to watch Alec rub his eyes, never having looked more tired than he did right then. Still, he didn’t waver as he spoke next, “I would know, believe me.”

Even if he had been addressing both, Alec was looking at Jace alone. And Jace knew that Alec was thinking of the last time they had seen each other, when Jace had had a sword at Alec’s neck…when he had told Alec he would never love him back…when he hadn’t killed Alec, yes, but he had wanted to…

So, even if Alec might have interpreted that non-killing as the ‘real’ Jace shining through, and even if what Alec had said to him - that he would always…love him - might still stand true, that didn’t change the reality of the situation: that Jace could never go back. It had been too much, he had crossed too many a line that a parabatai should never cross. He had repudiated Alec, in favor of another soul-bond with a demon!

It didn’t matter that he hadn’t been the one responsible for it…what was done was done, and Jace had to start now with pushing Alec as far away from him as possible. He had to make it up to him.

Jace opened his mouth – to say what, he still wasn’t sure, but he had to try – but he suddenly remembered that Izzy was still there. She seemed to take the clue, however, because she got up.

“Sleep well, Jace. See you tomorrow,” she bid them goodbye, before leaving the room, her shoulders hunched.

This was another example of how much he was hurting the Lightwoods. All of them.

No more.

Yet, Alec preceded his next words, rather harshly, “I don’t want to hear it.” Jace’s mouth closed shut against his will. “Whatever it is, save it,” Alec continued in the same tone, “I’m not going to listen to any bullshit coming from you right now, Jace. This is you, and you’re finally home, and I – all of us love you. I know it will take time to find a new…balance, but I’m not going anywhere, and you’re not going anywhere, or if you are I will hunt you down, you understand me?”

Jace still couldn’t speak, and Alec took that time to drag his chair closer to the bed, and grab Jace’s hand with both of his. It wasn’t a hard hold, Jace could’ve freed himself from it…but he was suddenly too tired to move.

“You’re back,” Alec said, his voice audibly shaken up - Jace didn’t know what had brought along such openness in Alec, and he didn’t know whether to love it or to run at full speed away from it. “And even if you’re not up to share your soul with someone else anymore, after what was done to you…just, let me be there for you, with you, in any way you want. I don’t ask for anything else.”

Love…love is not there in the hopes of being loved back. It just is, for no reason, with no condition, nothing to be gained. And you ask if I still love you? When I’m dead, and my soul has risen to the heavens…even then I will love you, Jace Herondale.

Alec’s words, uttered in a moment of absolute hopelessness and yet so full of hope, had haunted Jace’s other self, too. Now, they were sharper than a knife constantly twisting in Jace’s heart.

“I - I’m so sorry, Alec, I-” I’ll always want to share a soul with you, it’s you who shouldn’t have or want to.

“Shh, don’t talk now. Just rest,” Alec whispered kindly, lovingly.  

And the Jace I know…Jace loved more intensely, more deeply than everybody else. He did everything for love, he gave his own life, even when he thought it was making him weak. You might think it now, too...but there has never been more strength in a person than when Jace loved. And I know you’re still that person, Jace.

Jace didn’t know how to tell Alec that he was wrong; it wasn’t like that, he could never be the person Alec saw him as. He was nothing but the shell of a broken person…and the people he loved the most only cut themselves on all his edges.

“I…could I be alone for a while?” Jace merely said. He had to regain his bearings first, and then he could figure out how to proceed. Alec, however, raised an eyebrow at him. “I won’t – I won’t go anywhere, I swear. I just need a moment.”

Alec reluctantly nodded. “Okay. I’ll stay outside. Call me if you need anything.”

He’d stay outside.

When the truth was…Jace could never start to deserve the pureness of Alec’s love for him.

We’re in over our heads But somehow we make it back again

Alec sighed, falling on a chair outside the Infirmary.

It was not as if he had been expecting anything different, and at least the fact that Jace wasn’t going to run was a start; still, he had never felt heavier in his life.

Since he could feel that Jace hadn’t lied about getting away, however, Alec thought he could at least afford to get up and walk a few feet to sit down next to Clary instead.

She looked smaller than usual, if possible, all curled up on her seat. A rather strange sight, considering that during the battle, or the last time he had seen her before that, she had looked larger than life. Alec couldn’t help but feel a pang of sympathy, then, upon realizing that she was merely confined, like he was, in the space Jace had put in between them.

Alec had already made peace with the fact that she and him would always share that one fact: they both loved the person on the other side of the wall far too much.  

“You were brave...to do that,” he told her honestly. “I wouldn’t have been able to.”

Alec might’ve wanted to – and did - punch Jace in the face a few times in his life, but he could never bury a sword into his chest, if it could mean killing him.

Did that mean Clary had more faith in Jace than he did?

No, he could never allow that to be true. Causing harm to Jace was simply everything that their bond stood against. Killing himself would be easier than even coming close to killing Jace.

Alec sighed again.

“I lost him,” Clary suddenly said, in a small voice just as unlike her.

Alec frowned. “What do you mean? He’s here. He’ll be fine, eventually. You saved him, and he loves you.”

“No, I didn’t. And he doesn’t.”

Alec didn’t understand what had gotten into Clary, so he frowned harder, turning his head towards her. “Hey, don’t say that. You went willingly into Jonathan’s clutches to be able to bring him back. Jace’s in that room right now because of everything you did for him.”

Only his reluctant drive to absolute honesty could bring Alec to admit that, because it pained him immensely to just think about it.

During those wretched weeks when Jace had been lost, Alec couldn’t have wanted more than to just drop everything and run after him; but he’d had an Institute to run, a war to win, a family to secure. Clary, instead, had been free as a bird, and Alec didn’t know if it was her recklessness that had rubbed off on him, or if he had simply realized that, all in all, Clary’s plans – infuriatingly – always seemed to work in her favor…but she had seemed Jace’s only chance. That was why he had chosen to send her on the insane mission to join Jonathan and Jace, after prohibiting her from doing so in front of the entire Institute…

To this day, people still didn’t know that Alec was the one responsible for her escape from the confinement of the room he had put her in.

****

Alec walked through the silent corridors pretending to be checking on the guards stationed there. Secretly, he was on a mission.

When he reached Clary’s room at the precise moment of the change of guard, Alec’s mind had already been made up for hours.

He took out his stele from the inside of his pocket and opened the door in a swift move.

Clary jumped from her bed at hearing someone enter, but Alec put a finger on his lips to signal her to be quiet. She looked at him perplexed, but a small flame of hope could already be seen in her eyes.

It only became bigger as Alec took something else from his pocket. Her stele.

He handed it to her.

“Bring him back.”

He watched her enter a portal with what could only be called hope burning up in him.

****

Clary looked Alec in the eyes then, the fire completely spent in hers. “I wasn’t able to bring him back. I wasn’t. Whenever he was with me, he fell further and further into the persona Lilith had created for him. But after - it was you, wasn’t it? He saw you, and I know he did, because he came back from a mission one night completely distraught…and ever since then he looked at Jonathan differently, he started questioning things, he was able to break free from the compulsion more and more! One time, he managed to talk to me as himself, even though he could barely look at me…and he begged me to kill him, Alec, and to tell you that he was sorry.”

Alec realized his mouth was hanging open, and he closed it. Both his head and heart hurt as he took in her words. “He – he begged you…and what are you even saying, Clary? He’s my parabatai, we share a connection similar to what he had with Jonathan, it makes sense that he would get drawn out of that by me. It doesn’t mean he - he loves you any less or whatever it is that you are implying.”

Clary’s smile was more of a grimace. “In any other case I would believe that, too, but I know what I felt. I can tell that something’s changed in him, and that I’m not someone he wants to be near to anymore.”

“Well, that makes two of us.” Alec gestured to where they were, and where Jace was. “Just give him time, okay?”

Clary got up. “Only if you do that too.”

Alec pretended not to understand her, and simply bid her goodnight when she did.

Her words lingered in the air all around him even after she had left.

It was not as if Alec didn’t understand what she had tried to get at, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t believe that she was completely out of track.

Knowing that his desperate stunt to go after Jace against every logic had somehow helped, felt good, yes. Back then, he had needed to just see him, only once, to make sure that something of his Jace was still in this world…not wanting to live in it any longer if there wasn’t, and what better way to go than by his parabatai’s own hands?

Instead, the mark he had left on Jace a lifetime ago had still meant something; that Jace was tied to Alec in ways he wasn’t with anybody else, dark magic or not, and only him could draw Jace back from the darkest of places. It felt better than good, actually, because that was the whole point Alec had ever entered the bond with Jace in the first place…

Still, Clary was wrong. Alec knew Jace loved him, deeply, as all of this had clearly shown…but Alec had passed the time when he hoped Jace would feel something that he simply didn’t.

Clary had Jace like that, and Alec was okay with it. Because what all that had happened had also showed, was that Alec had Jace on a whole other level, that would always matter – to him, and to Jace, maybe? – the most.

Soon, Jace would come out of the dark pit he had fallen into. They’d defeat Jonathan once and for all, and they’d all go back to a normal, peaceful way of life. Together.

Alec knew he couldn’t pretend he could go back to Magnus after ghosting him once again during the stress of war…and apprehension for Jace…but he could live with that. They’d all be fine.

When the colors turn grey and the lights all fade To black again

Jace couldn’t bear to be laying down on the bed any longer. He got up, starting to pace the room while he ignored the uncomfortable heat of his body. He had a fever now, great, exactly another thing he didn’t need.

A plan of action. That was what he needed.

Think, Wa-Herondale, think!

He couldn’t leave for now, that was sure, at least not until Alec lowered his guard a little bit. But he’d have to go, eventually, and hunt down Jonathan. He’d kill him, for real this time, and he’d make sure that bastard wouldn’t be able to come back ever again. And then…he’ll figure out a new plan.

In the meantime, Jace calculated it’d take one week before Alec would close both eyes while sleeping. Hopefully.

In that one week, Jace would pretend to be feeling better and better. He’d share with Alec a few things, if asked, to not arouse suspicions. And then, he’d be able to sneak out under Alec’s radar…

Was that his plan? Pretending everything was fine wouldn’t drive Alec away…not even almost killing him had done that. No, his plan was to make his eventual departure as much of a betrayal as possible. He’d be himself, so Alec couldn’t possibly put it on any demonic influence. If he broke his trust hard enough, Alec had to realize that Jace was bad for him. Jace had already almost achieved that, without meaning to, back when Clary had first entered their lives…he’d just have to do it again, on purpose this time.

He’d do it.

As soon as his resolve strengthened, however, he was rewarded with a sharp pain flaring up in him.

No, not again!

Yet, this felt different from those spasms that had gripped him constantly after he had come back to life. If those had sucked out all his strength, his life-force, his sanity…now, Jace felt like he’d be able to take down a greater demon alone, bare-handed.

He looked down at himself, and, if he wasn’t exactly glowing, his skin appeared to be glistening. His hands were curled up in fists, and he wanted nothing more but to rain them down on something, Jonathan preferably; and the fact that he wasn’t doing so only caused the heat in his body to rise and rise…until he couldn’t hold in a scream any longer.

A second later, he could’ve kicked himself, when, inevitably, the door to the Infirmary opened and Alec entered hot on the heels of Brother Enoch.

Jace realized he was on his knees only when the latter crouched down next to him. But, as soon as he touched him, Brother Enoch snatched his hand away with a hiss. Jace was only vaguely aware of that, just as he took notice only on the side of the fact that the Silent Brother quickly signaled Alec of the danger. At that point, Jace could no longer pretend he wasn’t about to combust internally.

He laid down on the floor, curling up into a ball to try and contain himself. A ringing sound was pressing into his ears before he lost consciousness.

The Heavenly Fire is inside you now, Brother Enoch told him when he woke up again, running in your system, and it will flare up anytime you have a burst of adrenaline. We of the Brotherhood we’ll try to figure out the best way to free you of it; in the meantime, I advise you to rest and exercise regularly, to see if your body will get used to the fire or not. Don’t be alone when you do that, and be sure to warn the people of the dangers of your skin.

Heavenly Fire. Jace knew others would see it as a sign that he was blessed; after all, the fire hadn’t killed him, which meant there was good in him, and now the fire of heaven literally flowed in his veins. Jace did see it as a blessing, yes…but in the way that it now meant that people had to steer clear of him, if they didn’t want to get burned.

The fire was but the mere physical manifestation of what Jace knew of himself: he projected pain all around him.

Either way, Jace chose to do what Brother Enoch had told him; it was simply easier that way. As soon as he was allowed back into his room, he stayed there all the time unless he was training. He exercised in bursts, to not cause his body to overheat again, but now that he knew about it, he seemed at least able to control it better than before. He didn’t collapse again, for one; being able to challenge the rush of power in an effective way apparently made all the difference. And, in those moments, he felt more alive than he did any other time. 

It was a good excuse, too, to avoid people. Jace would train, then he could simply say he was too exhausted to socialize or reconnect with the family he had in the Institute.

The Lightwoods had come to see him when he was still in the Infirmary. Maryse had smiled and hugged him, warmer than usual over her joy for his return; Robert had clapped him on the back with comforting words of ‘everything will get better’; Max had excitedly recounted the happenings of his training with a big smile on his face. Jace had smiled the entire time, too…a smile that had fallen as soon as they had left.

Alec and Izzy had been there as well, and Jace wasn’t deluded that they couldn’t read past his façade. Still, he never let them corner him into talking for more than was necessary. If they were with him during training, he exhausted them and himself so much – they did need all the preparation to bring this war to an end once and for all - that in the end they could only go back to bed. And since he had made clear he needed the time and space, they kept their distance. Jace couldn’t help but constantly battle with himself over both his regret and relief at how isolated that made him.    

And it was not as if he couldn’t tell that Alec was brooding, as his parabatai watched him silently and from afar. Jace felt in his very soul that Alec was longing desperately to regain a closeness with him, and that he was worried, especially after the new revelation about the fire in his veins…but Jace’s plan hadn’t changed. He still needed to find that opening, which, no matter Alec’s consideration for his need of space, wasn’t a small feat. Waking up earlier than usual one day, Jace had caught Alec sleeping on a chair outside of his room, by the Angel. A sight that had felt like an ice-cold shower, at the same time that something inside of him grew warmer. Right then, Jace would’ve wanted either to throw himself at Alec…or to shake him awake to tell him to run as far away from him as possible.

Clary had been the easier to avoid, as she appeared as reluctant to confront him as he was.

That was why he would’ve never expected her to approach him in the courtyard while he was practicing his flips...Izzy had been there with him, but now Jace realized that she wasn’t, the traitor probably having left the both of them to have a moment alone.

Clary didn’t even give him the time to regain his bearings, before she greeted him in a cheerful tone that Jace knew was fake, “Hey.”

“Hey,” he replied, fidgeting with his hands.

She cut straight to the chase. “Please, just tell me if you really don’t feel for me anymore, or if I’m only imagining things. I need to know.”

Jace looked down at his own feet, suddenly unable to speak another word…but he’d have to, if he didn’t want to let time go to waste for all eternity, immobilizing them both in a crippling impasse. Plus, he owed her at least that.

“Clary, I – I really wish you weren’t imagining things,” he finally forced himself to say.  

And when he finally glanced at her, Jace didn’t know which one of them wanted to cry the most. He was used to swallowing down the lump in his throat, so he was grateful that Clary did that, too, merely nodding at him while biting her lip…or he couldn’t have continued.

“I just…I thought you were everything I wanted.” If only that one sentence could’ve been enough to put an end to it all. “Even before the compulsion, I – it’s just that I’m starting to think that the blood, the Angel blood we bought share, might’ve drawn us towards each other, you know? Because, when it came to the real thing, I didn’t feel what I thought I would have, and…and I really wish I could give you a better explanation, but I – I don’t know what else to say. I just know that I-” I’d be sick if I ever touched you again. You’re the most confusing mistake I’ve ever made, because I was so sure, yet I’ve never been more wrong.

He couldn’t bring himself to utter either of those sentences.

Clary must’ve understood anyway, because she nodded again, more vigorously this time, as if she couldn’t manage to do anything else. “Is it just…was it something I did?”

“No, no, of course not. You were…great, I – thank you for everything you did for me. Honestly, I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.” He paused. (He projected pain all around him.) “I’m so sorry, Clary.”

A few tears finally left Clary’s eyes. “Is it Alec?”

Jace had to do a double take at that; thinking too hard about Alec was the last thing he wanted to do. “What about him?”

“Do you love him?” she asked more firmly, her gaze fixed on him.

Jace opened his mouth, almost about to laugh, “Ehm, of course? He’s my parabatai. What are you on about?” Even though he had said that casually, his heart started jumping inexplicably inside his chest, and he had to cross his arms, frowning.

Clary, even more inexplicably, rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I heard that already, you two, I swear…I mean, are you in love with him?”

This time, Jace’s mouth started hanging open on its own, and for a good while, before he finally noticed it. He cleared his throat, now that his heart was practically stuck there. “Why – why do you say that?” Jace swiftly looked around at the thankfully empty courtyard. “Do you know that it’s against the Law even mentioning something like that?”

“I’m aware of that, thank you. But I just need to...listen, hypothetically, without any Law or what not, would you want to be with-”

“I don’t understand why you’re asking me this, Clary!” Jace burst out, preventing those words from ever being uttered. “What do you get out of it?!”

“I need to understand what’s going on!” Clary shouted back. “I want to know why I’m losing you, because I’m tired of being blind! Yes, Alec’s your parabatai, but I had already noticed when I first met you that it means to both of you more than you believe, so I at least want to see it get somewhere! Or none of this pain has any point. Jace, I don’t want to see you beat around the bush forever about what you want from your life. I was the one there when you broke free from the compulsion after remembering Alec, when you asked me to kill you, or did you forget that?! And now, I see you going around like a ghost, distancing yourself from the people you love, and I can’t – I can’t stand it. I still love you, no matter what, and I just want to see you happy, you get that?”

For the third time, Jace was left with his mouth gaping open, a reply completely out of reach. When it was clear that he wasn’t going to break the silence, Clary took a step forward to better face him.

“Don’t close yourself off from living, or loving, because of everything that was done to you,” she urged him, now bordering on desperate. “Alec, he loves-”

“Alec deserves much better than anything I could ever offer him!”

Jace’s skin was blazing worse than the first time, as he took a step back, just about ready to bolt away, or explode.

“I don’t think he’d agree with you! If you just stopped for a moment to look at what’s really happening, you’d see how much he’s desperately trying to reach y-”

“Because I need you not to be blind, don’t I?! Why – why can’t you just stay away from things you know nothing about, Fray, for once in your life!”

At that, he really did storm off, albeit not before being compelled by the fire in his veins to punch a hole in the wall.

[shooter-nobunagun]

Unseen Village: Yahar’gul [Bloodborne AU]

//At last we explore the “forgotten village” proper, Yahar’gul. Spoilers abound for the latter half of the game, especially after the events of the blood moon!

Note: I ended up writing waaay too much (was wondering why this chapter never seemed to be any closer to being done) so I split it. I gotta pace myself better...

“This place...what happened?!” Once again they stood before the bloody moon, only this time the sky seemed to have changed with it as well. Gone were the murky clouds and dim sky, now replaced with a garish streaks of purple and yellow and the color of fire. Sio hadn’t seen much of the actual village during her first trip here, but it seemed like perhaps it was for the better. “The moon...it’s so large now!”

“And that color...I don’t like it.” Hunter shook his head. “This must be the blood moon that Rom an’ everyone else is talkin’ about...though I’m more worried about those things.”

“What things—oh...” Her gaze turned upwards and suddenly it came into view, sitting like a monstrous human spider, its body an alien blue-grey and a head that appeared more like a rock. It sat there, hanging off the spire with its too-long limbs and many-fingered hands, the numerous eyes constantly opening and closing in rapid succession. Sio felt her frenzy growing rapidly as she continued staring at the terrible creature. It wasn’t until she nearly burst did she finally tear her gaze away, panting and gasping as her frenzy slowly dissipated.

“Oy, Sio...you all right?” Adam’s worried gaze peered at her, but she simply nodded, leaning against him for a few seconds to regain her senses. “Careful; those Amygdalas are everywhere now, it seems...”

“A-Amygdalas...that’s what they’re called...” Groaning, she rubbed her temples, trying to will the headache away. Was this another symptom of her blood sickness? Sio felt a sudden sense that there was something she should be trying to figure out, in this strange world of blood moons and unnatural skies and filled with creatures beyond her imagination. But for some reason the more she tried, the less she seemed to understand.

“Sio...will you be all right? If you’re not feeling well, you should head back to the dream and get some rest.” She and Adam were trailing a bit behind the group, partly for safety (so a large-scale attack wouldn’t wipe them all out at once) and also because she sensed that Adam was trying to keep her away from those who might use her condition against her. “There’s nothing to be gained by pushing yourself too far.”

“N-No...no please, I’ll be fine. Trust me,” she searched his eyes, and he could only sigh and nod. “I’ll be all right...after all, I have you and Hunter to help me out.” A pause, before he gently placed a hand on her shoulder as if he was about to say something but instead he just rubbed the junction slightly, before nodding wordlessly.

The Amygdalas. Where did they come from in the first place? From what she’d heard the others talk about, there were suspicions that they’d been there all along, but for some unexplained reason, weren’t visible until now. Vidocq was insistent that the blood moon had something to do with it, but Sio felt there had to be something else, either triggered by the blood moon or maybe it was what she’d heard from Rom...

‘When the blood moon rises, the line between man and beast will become blurred...’ 

She shuddered slightly and tried not to think too hard about what those words specifically meant. There was no doubt what the end result of her blood sickness would entail: victims became the very beasts they hunted, stripped of all reasoning and humanity and replaced with a lust for blood and mindless killing. Already she could feel the primal urges increasing, especially when they fought; at times the frenzy was so strong it was all she could do to focus it on their enemies, rather than her fellow hunters. Swallowing thickly, she tried her best to catch up with the rest of the group, as they approached what appeared to be a deserted plaza.

“Careful...remember what we encountered las’ time, those blasted chime maidens—”

“Sshh, you’ll give our position away!” Geronimo gave a severe frown at the surgeon, who only returned it with equal fervor. “I think I see her; against that stone wall? Trying to blend in, eh? Cheap tricks like that don’t work on me...” Without another word, the crow hunter dashed forward with her axe raised, but before the killing strike could be dealt—

SSCCHHWWWWWIIINNGGG—

An intense beam of blue light, similar to the one they’d encountered in Byrgenwerth and against Rom sliced the ground in half, a trail of flame scorching the rock as everyone dodged haphazardly to the sides and alcoves. 

“God damn it, what the hell was that—”

“—It came from the Amygdala—but why would it attack us now?”

“Nevermind that, get that chime maiden before she summons anyone!” Adam barked at the other hunters to get back on their feet, but it was too late; already a hulking troll and several hunting dogs were materializing, followed by a crowd of insane villagers, all of whom were more than ready to tear them to pieces. “Blast it all to hell! As if we don’t have enough to deal with...!”

Whining was for losers however, and as soon as he could get a clear path Adam dashed towards the ghostly maiden and sank his stake into her body. Now there was just the matter of getting rid of her minions...and that alien creature. Adam cast a wary glance upwards, trying to fight off the brick troll while watching for the next time it decided to fire that magic beam. “Umph—” His side exploded in pain as the troll swung a particularly brutal left hook as he barely sidestepped the fire, sending him face-first into the stone ground. “Fuck...”

“Adam!” He heard the sound of her gun before she came into view, the spear ripping into the troll’s body as she pulled off another spectacular visceral attack, tearing out its guts with a gleeful smile... Wincing, Adam blinked a few times, trying to convince himself that the girl hadn’t actually grinned like she enjoyed killing and bloodshed; it was probably just the angle that he saw her at, and the light...had to have been, after all Sio was just an ordinary girl caught up in something so much larger than all of them combined...

“Adam! Adam, are you all right?” The face that appeared now was frightened and worried, but determined. “Hold still, you might’ve broken a rib or something—”

“—Let’s get out of the open, first—that Amygdala, it seems to be firing whenever it sees anyone,” he grunted, limping around to a half-ruined gateway with Sio’s help. “Thanks for that, back there; shouldn’t have gotten sloppy like that...” he coughed up a few bloody strands of saliva, Sio carefully checking his torso for any broken bones as she gingerly touched each rib. “Ughn—”

“Sorry! But, it’s here...” Taking a small knife from her pouch, she quickly sliced away at the fabric, revealing a mass of bruised and bloodied flesh. “O-Oh...that looks pretty bad...”

“Tell me about it...sure as hell feels broken,” Adam hissed through his teeth as Sio cleaned it the best she could with some alcohol, before attempting to bandage it without hurting him any further. “Where’s Hunter?” 

“Uh, last I saw he and that Tell guy were trying to get rid of the last of those dogs, down the steps...” Sio glanced around nervously, peeking at the Amygdala that was still curled around the rooftops. “Do you want me to go get him?”

Adam shook his head. “No, there’s no sense in running out there and putting yourself in danger just for one person; we’ll regroup with everyone after the battle. ‘Sides, you’ve gotten pretty good at this,” he ran a hand over the bandages, nodding in satisfaction. “This’ll do for now. Can’t be wasting blood vials for every little scrape.” Grunting, he rearmed the Stakedriver, but Sio noticed his movements were more hesitant.

“But...Adam...” Despite her worries, she knew he was right; it would be easier if they got rid of the remaining enemies first, and then find a place that would shelter them from the Amygdala’s gaze. Steeling herself, she followed him out from their hiding place, making sure to take the lead in clearing their path and warning him whenever she heard that peculiar sound of magic. ‘I don’t think we’ll be able to defeat that Amygdala...not from here, at least.’ She’d fired off a few bullets just to see if it could be dissuaded, but they only bounced off its skin harmlessly. Besides, every time she merely glanced at the creature she could feel the frenzy boiling up; if they didn’t get out of its sight soon, who knew what other difficulties they’d have to deal with.

It took a few seconds for her to recognize their chosen “hiding” spot, but after the others started commenting on that broken lamp, Sio suddenly realized they were back at the top of the Hypogean Gaol, where she’d first arrived after being knocked unconscious and dragged around in a dirty sack. “Th-this is...” Unconsciously she shuddered, gripping her weapon so tightly it felt like even the spear’s shaft would snap in two.

“Easy there lass, there’s no need t’ fear. We’re all here now, an’ yur much stronger than before, ye?” Hunter gave her a kindly pat on the back, though Sio was only slightly reassured. “Mind ye, doesn’t mean we should let our guard down...”

“No...we need to get ready,” William Tell was sighting his bow off into a dim corner. “We’re not alone...”

Nobody said a word, but all gazes turned to the direction of the bow’s aim. Three figures in the dim light, standing there but Sio knew the second they got their attentions, they would be in for a fight.

“There’s three of them, I’m fairly certain...” Tell lowered his bow and it changed back into a single blade. “Since we’ve a large group as well, it makes sense to split up and face them separately. We’ll have a much better chance of success than tackling them when they’re together.” 

“A spear, cane whip, and...what are those, claws of some sort?” Sio was looking through her own monocle at their foes; the first two hunters wielded fairly standard weapons that one could easily find, but the third... “He’s all crouched over...like a beast itself...”

Before she could make more sense of it however, the others were already assembling into three teams. “Ogura, you go with Hunter an’ Tell; you’ll be taking on the whip wielder. Vidocq’ll be with Jess and Mirza against the spearfighter, and I’ll take the last one with Geronimo.” Adam’s tone left no room for discussion, and so she could only nod in agreement, despite the fact that he was about to take on the unknown hunter with only one other person for back-up—and it wasn’t her at that. Though she hated to admit it, she was slightly miffed that he hadn’t asked her to team up with him—but after having been with him all this time, something told her that it wasn’t because of personal reasons. ‘But still, did he have to ask Geronimo of all people? I thought they disliked each other...’

“No need fer the green-eyed monster, lassie. I’m sure Adam’s got his reasons...” Hunter gave her a slight nudge, after she kept turning around and staring at the other two. “‘Sides, Geronimo’s too professional t’ be stickin’ her beak in others’ businesses.”

“I-I—wha—I didn’t say anything!” 

“Ye don’t hafta; yer eyes say it all, Miss Ogura,”  Hunter teased, but got serious soon after. “Anywho, ye can chew ‘im out after ‘f ye want; but fer now, let’s figure out how the hell we’re gonna deal with this mess.”

“Have either of you had any experience fighting against this type of weapon?” Tell split the bowblade apart, turning the single blade into a formidably-sized bow. “I’d rather keep my distance of course, but if need be, I can do melee-combat...”

“A threaded cane, similar to what Vidocq has; it was contrived as part of the original Workshop, and fairly common among hunters. You can use it as a bladed cane, or split it into the whip for crowd control. ‘Concealing the weapon inside the cane and flogging the beasts with the whip is partly an act of ceremony, an attempt to demonstrate to oneself that the bloodlust of the hunt will never encroach upon the soul,‘ or so they said... We’ll have to time our attacks carefully, it’s probably best to strike when he’s switching between forms.”

Though Tell did not say anything, his eyebrows raised slightly at the girl’s impressive description; not only on the weapon’s detailed background but the strategy to fight against it, as well. “...You are Ogura, correct? And according to the others, this is your first hunt...?”

“A-Ah, yeah...I’m not exactly experienced, so...” Sio rubbed her head sheepishly, suddenly keenly aware of how much younger she seemed compared to everyone else.

“That doesn’t matter; clearly, you are much more knowledgeable than even some of the most veteran hunters.” He gave her another peculiar look, not threatening but curious. “Are you perchance from a family of hunters...?”

“H-Huh? O-Oh no, no no no—I’m just your average girl from a regular old family, I guess...” Well all right that, wasn’t quite true, otherwise she’d still be back in her village and not about to face a deadly enemy in the middle of an abandoned prison. “I...I’m an only child, but I never had much friends...so I just mostly kept myself busy, studying weapons and strategy...a-ah, n, not that I hated it! I actually found it quite fascinating...”

“Hm. Fair enough. Perhaps you will become one of those they speak of in legends...” Tell sighted his bow once more, as the others started heading down to separate their quarry. “Careful; we’ll have to move quick so they don’t try and rejoin each other.”

The spear was now engaged in combat with a Kirkhammer, Vidocq’s whip-like blade cutting through the gloom with a silver gleam while Mirza worked to parry the blows. Their opponent headed towards their corner as well, Sio switching her rifle spear into its trick mode and Hunter separated his blades in two. Tell was off on his perch, firing shots when the opportunity presented itself, but even while dodging the serrated whip and striking back, she noticed that the third hunter, and Adam and Geronimo for that matter, were nowhere to be found.

“Where did those two go? This place is only so big...!”

“Focus on the battle at hand, lassie! Those two can take care of themselves!” Hunter grimaced as he nursed a gash on his cheek. “Knowin’ them, they probably took the fight outside...where there’s more space.”

Although she knew it was logical, and that Geronimo was honorable enough to not try anything, somehow the very fact that those two were out of sight didn’t sit well with her; Sio didn’t recognize this strange burning in her chest, but she knew she didn’t like it. ‘Am I really that jealous...? Even though I trust Adam, and Geronimo wouldn’t...she wouldn’t do anything to him, right?’ Not just those illogical feelings of possessiveness, but the uneasy fear that Geronimo wasn’t someone they could trust completely. 

Her anxious feelings translated into an increased frenzy on the field, the bloodlust growing as she lunged straight down at the hostile hunter, effectively splitting his spine in half as she landed on the bloody corpse with a ‘thump’. Neither Hunter nor Tell said anything much aside from the usual acknowledgements, but she could sense that both of them were viewing her with a sort of feared respect. Elsewhere, the other trio had also finished their fight, and was now in the middle of salvaging and weapon repairs.

“...I’m going to go look for Adam and Geronimo; they’re still not back, and it was only the two of them.” Without even waiting for a response, Sio armed her weapons and headed out the entrance, with Hunter and Tell looking silently on. --- “Watch it! He’s transforming...already more beast than man!” Adam dodged the claw’s swipe, countering with a ferocious thrust as the man-beast howled in fury.

“Hmph, that’s not a problem...” Licking her lips, the Crow Hunter neatly blocked the monster claws with the blunt side of her axe, before firing a shot and nearly decapitating the mad hunter. “Muirhead!”

“Don’t even need t’ ask.” With a grin, the Stakedriver plunged into the beast’s chest, Adam ripping out the insides with a visceral attack that was not unlike the one Sio had pulled off earlier. 

“Well, we managed to make a pretty good team, Muirhead,” the other woman drawled, pushing aside the remains with the end of her giant axe. “Sure you don’t want to change your mind about changing partners?”

“Hn. Thanks but no thanks; besides, don’t you work alone? Why are you still hangin’ around? The beckoning bell’s effects ended a while ago.” Adam didn’t even bother looking at Geronimo, instead more concerned with studying the mangled, mutated body and those claws. “I wonder...if this weapon accelerates the beasthood process...”

“That doesn’t mean I won’t consider the prospects of teaming up...especially with a strong hunter like yourself, we could do a fair bit of damage...maybe even end this scourge, and prevent more hunters from becoming beasts...” Before he knew it Geronimo had gotten much closer than he liked, those dark eyes narrowed into a enigmatic smile as she brushed the bottom of his chin—

“—Adam! Oh...” He pulled away immediately, but not before he caught sight of the petite huntress’ expression: shock, a slight embarrassment, and...anger? “...Geronimo, Muirhead. We’re uh, all done inside...so...”

“Sure.” Geronimo slipped by cooly, as if nothing had happened at all except for a whisper—

”—she’s an interesting one, isn’t she, Muirhead? Very interesting...”

And then Adam was staring at that cape of black feathers, the Crow Hunter whistling casually as Sio slowly trudged forward.

“Sio...you all right?” The air was thick with some sort of unspoken tension, but Adam had enough sense to know that this was not the time nor place to sort it out...whatever it was. “Everyone else all right?”

“...Yeah...” She was definitely upset; her single-word, callous answers notwithstanding, the girl was deliberately not looking his direction, instead adamantly pulling her hat lower and stalking back to the Hypogean Gaol. Great, just what he needed to deal with in a realm that was already more dangerous than usual: emotions. Not for the first time, he questioned the wisdom of attempting to pursue a relationship with the girl. Even though Hunter had more-or-less given them his blessing, Capa’s warning, and his own inner doubts, continued to sit with him.

Don’t fall for her; she’ll just make you cry, in the end.

The emotional turmoil did not make it any easier as the group trudged through the abandoned town, making their way across an especially precarious tower that was filled with foes both human and inhuman. More Amygdalas seemed to have made their home here, as well, but unlike the one they faced earlier, these seemed content to just leave the group alone. Still, he kept a close eye on the girl, who hadn’t said much since they left the crypt; for some unknown reason, the Amygdalas were making her condition worse, even when they weren’t engaged in combat. Hunter had cast a dark glance back more than once, especially after Sio nearly stumbled for no apparent reason, most of the group just shrugging it off as fatigue but Adam didn’t miss the way Mirza’s eyes kept watching her. Gently he tried to reach out to her, to tell her that she didn’t have to push so hard and that...thing with Geronimo hadn’t meant anything at all, but she coldly shrugged it off, only saying that she had tripped and would be fine.

“Leave ‘er be, Muirhead. She’ll be fine.” Hunter said lowly, not wanting to attract attention. “This has something t’ do wit’ Geronimo, don’t it? The lassie wasnae too pleased ‘bout it...” The silver-haired hunter cast as irate a look as he had in a long time, leaving Hunter frantically trying to mollify the other man.

“Piss off,” Adam muttered, though his tone was more resigned than angry. “...Are you seriously accusing me of...underhanded actions, even after all...that?”

“Of course not,” the lanky surgeon hastily replied, “I meant it when I said I trust ye, Adam. I figured ye had yur reasons...but I’ll admit, I’m curious meself. I thought you detested the Crow Hunter?”

Adam snorted. “Beast huntin’ ain’t exactly a profession for the choosy. The woman’s a fair enough fighter...if she could just stop actin’ like this is all some kind of grand game. Of all the hunters in this group. she’s probably the one I’d want t’ avoid going toe-to-toe with the most...’

“That’s fair, but why her? You think none of the others can match you?”

“...That hostile hunter we faced. You saw his weapon—hell, even the squirt pointed it out herself. Beast claws,” he added, and Hunter’s face dawned in understanding. “I was afraid...if she got too close, and with her already like this...”

Neither man said anything more, Hunter now visibly broodier as they pushed their way through mobs of creatures, each spawned by a hidden chime maiden. Yahar’gul may have been abandoned, but it certainly wasn’t dead; it seemed like every corner was filled with some sort of hazard, even compared to memories of his previous hunts—and it was anyone’s guess as to what made the Amygdalas attack, if at all. It wasn’t until the road opened up to some sort of open street did they get a chance to breathe...somewhat. A hissing noise before a gush of vile liquid arched through the air, just missing the group as it landed on the stone walkway, where it proceeded to sizzle and smoke, seemingly burning through solid rock. Sio lept back in shock, before tracking the venom over the side of the wall to the streets below.

“What’s th...th, th-that?!” She didn’t even have any words for the horror that had spat the vile liquid: what appeared to be a tangled mass of half-rotten skeletons, somehow all fused together and shoved into a casket that was much too small to fit them all, forcing the hideous creature to spill out and writhe onto the cobblestones. The many arms and hands clawed and pulled every which way, and what remained of the bodies squirmed randomly as each individual seemed to have its own mind. The creature’s contorted movements and twisted designs left Sio feeling nauseated, and before the group had even decided on how to deal with these monsters she heaved, a puddle of vomit splashing right next to the poison itself.

“Easy there now, lass. Here, drink some water,” Hunter kindly patted her back as Sio emptied the last of what remained in her stomach, breathing hard. “Those cramped caskets probably rank as one of the ugliest sods out there...as dangerous as they are ugly, to boot.”

“H-How...wh, why...” Those large maroons open wide with fear and just plain confusion; she knew that Yharnam was home to nightmares that were indescribable, but this was just too much. “Why is it so...terrible?”

“...If we knew the answer t’ that, we wouldn’t be here.” Adam answered quietly for her. “Chin up, Ogura. We’ve ground to cover.”

She was a little surprised at how civil he was towards her, despite the cold shoulder she was giving him. Which, now that she thought about it, was probably just a bit too childish of her, especially at this point. ‘I guess I really am still a kid,’ she thought bitterly, though when her mind flashed back to that single moment when he and Geronimo were so close...a flash of heated anger flooded her senses, and she wiped her mouth and forced herself to stand up.

It was decided that they would move as two groups; the street was too dangerous to just go waltzing about in the open, and splitting up would allow them to deal with several threats at once. Morbid as the caskets were, Sio discovered they could be tricked into a lit fire, making it easy for her to get in several visceral attacks on the flaming mass of flesh. The streets were littered with what appeared to be stone statues...and yet, as she gazed upon their faces, frozen with fear and something else... No, they couldn’t be real humans. It just wasn’t possible... A sudden roar, before she was pushed roughly against these stone figures and narrowly missed getting sprayed by that poison. “Keep your guard up, Ogura.” By the time she managed to right herself, Tell had already sliced up the monstrosity using the blade form of his weapon.

“S, Sorry...” She shook her head to clear it. This wasn’t the time to be solving the mysteries of this world, though Sio knew that wasn’t the only thing that was distracting her. This tension between her and Adam...it was getting unbearable, even before Geronimo decided to pull that stupid prank. It wasn’t the same as when she was seeking his respect and getting irritated with his put-downs, no...this kind of feeling was closer to seeking a type of satisfaction, to quell this strange desire she was feeling...

Like when they almost kissed that time; her cheeks became hot and she forced herself to pay attention to the battle. ‘Now is not the time to be thinking this, Sio...’ If this was what it was like to fall in love and all that romantic, mushy crap she’d heard so many of the village girls gossip about, Sio wasn’t sure she wanted it. It was very distracting, for one, but it was also frustrating that no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t seem to detach herself from it.

“Lass, you alright?” That strongly-accented voice cheered her up slightly, especially now that the streets were slightly-less-deadly than they had been. “C’mon, let’s find the others.”

“Right...how’s everyone else?”

“Eh, nothin’ fatal. By the way, nice work figurin’ out how t’ lure ‘em into th’ fires.” Hunter nodded in appreciation. “Seriously, findin’ you was like a single blessing in this wretched place.” Sio blushed at his comments, and wondered why Adam couldn’t be polite and caring like the surgeon. 

“Hunter. Ogura...” Speak of the devil. She gave him a single nod as he said her name, not sure yet how she wanted to act towards him. In any case, they were currently in the field of battle, so it would be understandable for her to be all business-like...right? “There’s a plaza of sorts coming up; I think we know what that means...”

“...There’s something there.” There was no proof yet, but after all these hunts, they knew from experience that coming across a seemingly-deserted area usually meant something dangerous lurked nearby. 

“Here, there’s a shortcut. We just need to use this as a stepping—” Adam’s voice cut off mid-sentence as the rotting carriage gave a violent shake, muffled cries coming from inside. “...Or, not...”

“...Right then. I vote we look for an alternative.” 

“But, we’d have to spend more time looking for one...and there’s no guarantee it’ll be any safer,” both men looked at the girl with a slight surprise. “If we’re fast enough...it should be fine...”

At least she hoped so; Sio didn’t want to admit it, but the rattling carriage was terrifying her to no end. Just knowing how things were, it was bound to burst open the second she stepped foot onto it...and yet, it was the quickest way down, perhaps even the only way. “...Worst case, there’s three of us...we should be able to handle anything...”

“Can’t say I’ve much faith in meself, but I’ll trust yer instincts lass,” Hunter shook his head gravely, but got up anyway, despite the fact that he was probably the least courageous out of the entire group. “Well, no use in puttin’ it off...”

“I’ll go first,” Sio volunteered the lead, after all it was her idea to go forward, despite the high risk. Steeling herself, she gingerly landed on the carriage, trying not to think about the vibrations underfoot and the awful moans as she cautiously made her way across, Hunter landing not too far behind.

‘Here it goes,’ she gulped and then leapt down, wincing a bit from the height but otherwise it seemed all right, nothing was broken and no monsters were in sight. “Hey, it’s all—”

The sentence wasn’t even out of her mouth before the carriage windows shattered violently, and the whole thing seemed to topple over as the what appeared to be an endless stream of mutilated corpses were disgorged. Sio briefly heard Hunter and Adam cursing as they fought for their footing, before the whole thing was drowned out by the cries of undead bodies as they seemed to cave in on her; she herself too shocked by the sight to do any but just watch through her fingers as she vainly tried to shield herself.

“Sio! Sio! Dammit, get off her you bastards!” Growling, Adam plunged his way through the seemingly endless number of flailing limbs and half-melted bodies, but he couldn’t risk just recklessly stabbing the pile, lest he accidentally hurt her. “Sio! Hang on!”

“Somehow I knew this was gonna happen,” Hunter bemoaned, but plunged straight in as well. The two men worked with a sort of possessed fervor, Hunter not even flinching as a wailing corpse tried to reach out and grab his neck.

“Sio! Can you hear me? Sio...!”

[lamiaward]

I don’t own OUAT.

Summary;  Was it normal for princesses and dragons to be friends and enemies all at once? Princess Regina waits in her tower, the dragon captured and made to guard her , her only constant companion. It's what all Princesses experience, waiting for the prince that manages to slay the dragon. Except, does Regina want him to come? 

[ this is like part 4 of ‘devour me’ , I suppose you could only read this part, but I would advise you to read the rest too; it is easier to understand that way :) 

Warnings: very controlling mother (Cora) / allusions to abuse

Dragons are elusive creatures, studying them is both a time-consuming and dangerous activity. But what is even more rare than surviving multiple encounters, is seeing them in their human forms. We know they have them- but that is almost all that we know.

Regina had all her knowledge about dragons from two books, the only two that had been in their library. There had been a lot of passages like “ it is assumed’ , ‘we suspect’ and one of the books had been rather small. Her mother did not necessarily approve of her reading – a wife has other duties Regina- but she had been particularly chagrined when Regina had inquired about dragons.

Still, she had had a need to know more, justified- in her own mind- by the fact that she would soon share a tower with one. So she had not let Cora’s snide words or her teachers’ gentle persuasion stop her, sneaking towards the library one night when Cora was holding council( Regina was never invited, not when the involved were sorcerers, giants and trained murderers).

The first time she looked at the books, she had honestly thought Cora had decided that Regina wasn’t allowed to learn too much and there were piles of books on the subjects hidden in Cora’s chambers ( or worse, the west wing she knew her mother kept her spellbooks and had seen Cora’s worst enemies as well as terrifying beings brought to) .

Later, she discovered dragons were an ultimate source of annoyance for her mother. Through the gossip mill as well as Cora herself, she learned that dragons truly were as elusive and dangerous as the books warned; her mother had sent many (warriors, scientists, even sorcerers ) to any place that dragons had been spotted, had promised heavy sums of magic- Regina suspected she had also offered any of the objects she kept in the west wing- and send messages across her own kingdom as well as neighbouring-

But only a few had returned. Sometimes, it was well-known that anyone Cora had send, had been burned or eaten. Other times, they just did not return and no one knew what had happened.

(once , Regina had heard about a dragon who had fallen in love with a bounty hunter. But Cora had sneered and said that it was all ‘idiotic and impossible’)

It was why humans – and even someone as powerful and relentless as Regina’s own mother- knew so little about dragons. The royalty had found it was not impossible to capture dragons, sure – although it often cost many lives- and they had even started the practise of having one of ‘their’ dragons guard their princesses, but even caught and enslaved, dragons were fierce and strong.

They did not give up their secrets.

Perhaps that is why I am so fascinated Regina thought, lowering her book to glance at the slumbering form curled around her. Mal was in human form, exhausted after hunting and teaching and trying to stay awake as long as possible. She made little sounds in the back of her throat – I would never have expected you to be adorable – and radiated warmth as she pressed against Regina.

Regina smiled, feeling absurdly proud that Mal had reached the point where she trusted Regina enough to sleep curled around her. It had been a trust that had slowly been developed, a trust that was necessary between a learning sorceress and her teacher.

Still, it made Regina feel special and treasured. She was certain that the sometimes cold dragon did not lower her walls like this for any human (in fact, she seemed to loathe most humans- perhaps even all). She knew Mal had good reason to distrust humans, even if she felt like Mal had yet to tell the whole story. Mal did not like talking about the past, teased her that ‘such emotive conversations are such a human thing. Dragons are not as sensitive as your kind, we have thicker skin’.

Really, Regina thought dragons just lived a really lonely life.

Mal yawned and pressed closer to her, then slowly started to pushed herself up and rested her chin on Regina’s shoulder. She kissed her cheek- Regina really thought she only did that because Mal loved making her blush- and squinted at the book. “ What are you reading this time?”

“Hm. It is that book you brought me”

“ Ah” Mal seemed to be losing interest already, focusing her intention on Regina’s hair, playing with it.

“ You still have to tell me where you got it”.

“ I just got it from some human”.

“ Who?”.

“ Some snivelling person”

Regina gasped. “ You did not approach him in your other form, did you?”.

She almost jumped when Mal chuckled, pressed so close to Regina that she could almost feel the vibrations of her voice. “ Calm down , little one. I was in this form, your kind is just too easily startled”.

Regina sighed. “ You would say that”.

Mal chuckled again, then gently blew fire against Regina’s neck. It didn’t hurt – in fact it felt rather pleasant- but Regina pulled away nonetheless. She turned her head to glare at Mal. “ I told you not to do that anymore”

“ Hm, but you always blush so prettily when I do” Mal said, pressing a finger to Regina’s cheeks- that were indeed a fierce red.

“ Why do you even enjoy it so much ? “

Mal shrugged. “ I just do. Must there always be a reason, some ulterior motive?”.

“ I have found that people always have an ulterior motive”.

Mal sneered. “ Humans might always have ulterior motives, but I assure you dragons do not. We follow our instincts and think little of things like power and money”.

“ So what instinct is prompting you to constantly fluster me, then?” she felt that same blush rise a little at the look Mal threw her immediately as she licked her lips. Why do I constantly feel like she is going to eat me… why do I not get afraid at the thought?

Mal pulled at the locks she still held in one hand. “ You can figure that out for yourself”. She stood up and stretched. She laughed briefly as she caught Regina’s eyes on her. “ Staring , again? “.

Regina looked down at her book for a moment, then managed to look into Mal’s eyes “ You stare at me all the time, too”.

“ Oh?”.

“Like when I am asleep, I can sometimes feel your eyes on me”.

“ I am meant to guard you, so that is not at all surprising”.

“ So you look at other princesses like that as well? “.

Mal shrugged.  “No. I have little interest in other princesses”.

For some reason, Regina’s heart skipped a beat. She glanced at Mal, who looked disinterested, almost indifferent like usually. She didn’t know what to say , so she quickly changed the subject.  “ Do you intent to hunt again? “.

“ I won’t be gone for long”.

“ Okay” . Before Mal could change (and thus lose the ability to speak) she quickly added  “please do not hunt any humans”.

Mal didn’t reply- she never does- but she gave Regina a small smile as she stalked towards the window. Regina always loathes this part- even if she rationally knows Mal won’t be hurt, it is still awful to watch her jump out of the window and fall before managing to change and fly away.

Regina only picked up her book again when her eyes couldn’t make out the dragon’s shape anymore, even though every time Mal left on a hunting trip, she could only focus again when Mal had returned safely.

It wasn’t different this time; the words she read never sinking in, her having to read sentences three or even four times. She couldn’t keep her eyes from gliding towards the window to search for a familiar shape.

She had just finally been able to force her concentration back to her book when she heard it: a roar so loud it almost made the earth tremble. She dropped her book as she almost tripped in her haste to get to the window, then pushed herself up to better see. Her eyes scanned the sky frantically, not able to determine where-

She lunged back when there was sudden heat.

The heat lasted for a few minutes before it faded , which was her sign to stand up. She carefully glanced down- then gasped as she saw him: a person clinging to the brick. She could not see much of them- their face was pressed against the brick. She could only make out the quiver of arrows, the bow and short hair.

Another furious roar made her look away from the person only barely hanging on.

Her dragon was terrifying like this: jaw wide open, chest glowing with fire, eyes filled with fury. Regina herself wasn’t frightened for her own safety , but she definitely feared for the intruder

Oh gods, she is going to kill him.

---

Dragons are possessive, protective creatures. Regina remembered reading this, but it is still baffling- and infuriating and flattering and a thousand other complicated emotions that mean trouble because she is not supposed to like Mal , definitely not this much- when her Dragon basically goes berserk at the sight of the thief sitting close to Regina and smiling at her. Smiling at her like no one but him- whose name she won’t even allow herself to remember because it is like putting a Thousand tiny stakes in her heart- has ever done.

And it is not like Mal has any reason to get as protective as she is, but she still likes that smile (she just likes the small, hard-won smile that Mal has more)

His hair is slightly smoking as he sits next to her, and there is a very ugly wound on his arm. Behind him, Mal is curled around the tower, little puffs of smoke coming out of her mouth and drifting towards the thief.  Regina has already warned her three times (she kept sliding closer and closer to the thief in a way that made it extremely obvious she was thinking about turning him into a tasty snack) but she still is very obviously threatening the thief while at the same time claiming Regina (the tail wrapped around her shoulders is evidence of that).

He flinches while Regina cleans and binds the wound , his eyes focused on the black tail wrapped around Regina’s shoulder. His eyes are wary and whenever he tries to speak , he falters. Regina thinks it is caused by Mal, who does her uttermost best to terrify him - licking her lips, blowing smoke his way, curling around Regina in a way that screams ‘come too close and you will be roasted’.

“ What are you even doing around these parts?” Regina finally asks, ignoring the tension in the tower and pretending like her breath doesn’t stutter when Mal pushes her head through the window until her chin is level with Regina’s shoulder and the little puffs she is still releasing , caress Regina’s bare skin.

She doesn’t even look at Mal, not wanting to give her the satisfaction, not after she nearly hurt someone terribly.

“ My band is camping out in the woods a little while from here, and one of us got injured so I thought-“.

“ You would get some jewellery or something else with monetary value and buy medicine?” Regina offers.

“ Exactly, milady”.

Regina finishes tending to his wounds and straightens, walking over to the chest with jewels. She picks a few and walks back to the thief . “ I do not approve of thieving, but I do not want any of your people to die either” she says , offering him the jewels.

The thief jumps to his feet“ How can I ever thank you?”.

Before Regina can say anything, the thief grabs her hand. “ Come with me, I can get you out of this tower” he speaks earnestly and Regina, for the shortest moment, feels tempted. Even if living in this tower is pleasant – and her dragon an unexpected gift-  she still felt like she had been transferred to a new cage. She is so tired of cages.

He notes her hesitation and presses ‘Our lives may not be luxurious , but there is always food and friends so- “ he suddenly releases her hands and stumbles forward: Mal ( who had been sending smoke the thief’s way the entire time and would probably have used fire already if that did not mean endangering Regina) has suddenly pushed him from behind. Now she looks ready to do far, far worse.

The thief immediately turns around, grabbing an arrow from his quiver. Before he can release the arrow,  Regina pulls him behind her and stands between the two with raised hands.

“ Stop it, the both of you” she warns.

When Mal stops breathing in/out like she was preparing a giant fire ball, she slowly turns around to face the thief. He is still holding his bow, but at least it is not pointed at the Dragon’s chest anymore.  

“ I appreciate the offer, truly, but I cannot leave” she says, sincere but also firm.

He takes a few careful steps towards her, the look of annoyance and weariness replaced with empathy.  “ Milady, let me help you” he insists, reaching out for her hand but stopping when Mal lets out the most terrifying sound. It is a clear warning, a ‘I will hurt you if you come any closer’ kind of sound.  

“ You cannot help me” Regina says, which is the truth. Even if this person somehow manages to get her and the Dragon away from the tower, her mother would not rest until it was a prince ( better yet, a king) that had come for Regina.  Her mother has guards, magic, power… her mother has fear and hearts that controlled the people and would never let them go. If Regina only has a thief and a Dragon (no matter how strong, fierce, incredible) she will never win.

“ We can escape from this beast, I can get you to- “.

Regina takes a few steps back, shaking her head. Her heart is rattling wildly, her breaths too short and stuttering to the point that she felt dizzy. “ No. Leave her alone”.

She suddenly looks at the man with different eyes. She had liked him, had felt instinctively that he was not a bad man, that he was not stealing out of laziness and selfishness but now he seems like the worst kind of villain. Her eyes scan the room for any kind of defence, anything to keep him from hurting the Dragon but she did not see anything. Her fingers start to tingle, heat up like-

The man looks at her with confusion. “ Milady?”.

“ Just go. Leave! And never return. You are not getting to her” Regina snaps, her voice suddenly sharp and cutting. Her eyes narrow, her fingers stretch , her entire body language screaming discomfort and fury.

“ Did I say something wrong?”.

“ You said the worst thing you could have said”.

Instead of doing what Regina wants,  the thief takes a careful step towards her and scrunches his face up as he thinks. “ I don’t understand. Is this.. beast – “  he swallows and his grip on his bow tightens when the Mal moves forward until she is inches away from his face ( while still keeping her tail wrapped Regina) . “ Is it not keeping you trapped?”.  

Regina shakes her head. “ No- while yes, but not voluntarily- it takes a lot of time to explain” she looks pointedly at the man. “ Time you do not have. Go. Help your friend”. Her voice only softens the slightest bit, hardly noticable.

“ I am not leaving you here, at the mercy of – “.

Regina steps towards Mal, laying her hand on her head to calm her (when the man had stepped forward again, Mal chest had started to glow once again) and the thief’s mouth falls open a little. Regina does not know how he has missed it ( she had not shown even the slightest hint of fear around her dragon after all) but he finally seems to realize that this dragon and princess are not enemies at all, that it is not as black-and-white-simple as the beast and the Belle, the monster and the damsel.

“ A b.” he trails of, not sure at all anymore and Regina takes the opportunity to gently push him towards the window. “ You climbed up, I am sure you can climb down’ .

He glances at the Dragon again, and there is more than just weariness in his eyes. His eyes flit to the collar for the slightest moment, then get stuck on how she remains in front of Regina like a (fire)breathing shield.

Regina smiles, strokes the head beneath her hand. “ She won’t hurt you. And I will be all right”  

Finally, he starts walking towards the window. Just before he climbs out of the window , he turns to her. “ If you ever need my help, just ask for Robin of Locksley”.

Regina falters for a moment, not used to being treated like someone kind, someone worth of protection and help (all too used to looks of fear and mistrust, eyes that ask questions like ‘is she as cruel & cold like her mother). Then remembers herself and gives him a warm smile“ I  will remember that” and of course she would, because she knew that name. It is the name of the thief that dared to steal from Cora, whose heart Cora wants almost as much as dragon hearts, whose name fall from her lips in a hate-filled hiss.. A thief who is in as much danger as Regina’s brave serpent.

She thinks about giving her own name, but she loathes the terror and mistrust that always follow. There are few people who can see her for anything else than Cora’s daughter. So she just keeps stroking Mal’s head as she watches him disappeare,  climbing down quite easily and running towards the forest.

Only when he is very far away, does she feel Mal start to relax beneath her stroking fingers.  She slowly retracts her hands, with some reluctance. Mal’s tail reaches for her arm, but lets go- its owner apparently realizing Regina just wants to watch.

She walks over to the small hill of pillows on the window still, her spot to read and watch her Dragon and dream of faraway lands where she is not ‘ Cora’s daughter’, where she is not ‘The princess in the tower’ , where she is just Regina – whoever that is.  

Sometimes, she just sits there and stares at the stars and every night she asks a different one to just give her freedom, that she will never ask for another thing again, just that. She has been doing that since – well since forever, at least since as long as she can remember, since the very first time she heard something about asking the stars, about wishing on stars. She remembers staring at them from her father’s secure arms, thumb in mouth – do not bite or suck your thumb, dear- and asking them things like ‘playing outside instead of wearing those dresses that itch and cannot get dirty.

She suddenly misses her father, misses his gentle voice and the tiny ways in which he always tried to make her life easier, to make her happier.

She is vaguely aware of a shift in the air, of a subtle change of breathing, that smell of fire and leather and nature becoming less pronounced but she is mostly immersed in staring out of the window at the darkening edges of the flowers/burned  grass/ forest and thinking/dreaming. It is only when two hands fall on her shoulders that she is truly aware of what happened (she is in her human form again) and stiffens automatically ( after years of Cora’s cruel hands and the constant need to be on guard, she doesn’t think she can ever stop stiffening and flinching) , then slowly starts to relax until she is leaning against Mal.

Robin has long disappeared, but Regina – and by extension, Mal- remain at the still. Regina doesn’t move at all while Mal only moves to touch Regina’s hair- curl it around fingers, stroke it, gently pull at it. Mal is so very warm- she always is when she has just been in her other form – while Regina feels like she is freezing.

“ You are shivering” Mal whispers, her voice the first sound – apart from breathing- in what might have been hours. (must have been: the sky has started to truly darken and the stars have blinked themselves awake)

“ Make yourself warm” she orders, her tone slightly harder and definitely more commanding. Regina knows what she means- they have spent quite some time on all kinds of fire spells- but she just feels too depleted today.

She closes her eyes, waiting for Mal to push her (magic lessons mean constant pushing and hearing ‘you can do better, I expect better) but perhaps she senses Regina’s distress because she sighs and then there is a blanket floating towards them and Mal’s arms around her.

She sinks into the comfort and even it does not completely chase the cold away – or the memories she cannot ever push away deep enough- she feels better. She feels safe and protected, feelings that used to be unfamiliar to her, and thinks off the day they will leave this tower.

She has to believe they won’t say their goodbyes. She wants to believe it won’t be goodbye. She needs to believe Mal will still be in her life.

(and she can try to lie to herself, that it is just to make sure Cora won’t catch either of them or to protect villages from what a dragon can do to them, but –)

As Mal pushes her down on the bed, tugs the blanket over her and allows her to press against her, she knows she fiercely wants Mal in her life because every instinct she has -every feeling- tells her it is supposed to be that way.

For some reason, she thinks of the rare tales of dragons loving anything as she falls asleep.