#seriously one of the most beautiful songs ever written

[thedivinetarot]

Hold me, love me, touch me, honey be the first who ever did

Future spouse turn on +18

☆ How to chose your pile?

First clear your mind, take a deep breathe and close your eyes. Ask the question in your head "what will turn my future spouse on about me?". And shall the picture you are drawn to the most will be your pile.

☆ Disclaimer:

Please if you are under 18 do not interact or reblog this reading. This content is explicit and is not for you.

This is a general reading so don't put your life on hold for it. Also, this reading is written for the feminine (women, girls) if you are masculine or identify as a man this reading is NOT for you. This reading is for the feminine collective.

▪︎This reading was done using Raider Waite tarot deck and sexual magic tarot deck.

Lots of love 💕

Arya

Pile 1 - sleeping beauty

Your current energy

I feel like this pile’s energy is quite saddening. I see that you had a project to work on and nothing went as you hoped which made you clash with your team members and caused something unpleasant to face. I see that you feel quite empty and insecure towards your own thoughts. You have many creative thoughts to offer and you are so passionate about them but I see that because your team didn't listen to you or do anything you say it left you feeling unimportant or like a "chair's leg" idk how to explain it but they made you feel like an empty vase. Also you might have been feeling quite stuck and gloomy. I see that lately your self-esteem has dropped and you feel like nothing matter or you don't matter anymore. I'm so sorry for that pile one you deserve absolutely the best. Your thoughts and ideas are valuable and if someone didn't take them seriously that doesn't mean that they don't matter. Also, I see that you might be under a psychic attack or telepathy so be careful. I see that this person who is attacking you is quite naive and they are doing it with their whole will which means they know exactly what they are doing. I see that you are trying to get over them like your mind is trying to wash them off but they are like an ink stain that doesn't really go away. But eventually it will so don't worry. For others (people who are under psychic attack or telepathy) this person is trying to communicate telepathically with you so expect them to show up in your dreams or receivesigns from them. I see that what is between you two is not finished yet. You may see that everything has finished buuuttt it is not. This person may come with a love offer and communicate with you very soon. They may be working on themselves right now. Anyways the period of stagnation is almost over or it will be over by the end of this year.

☆ Placements for you:

Pisces, Capricorn, Taurus, Gemini, Libra, Cancer. Or you have Neptune, Saturn, Mercury prominent in your chart. Or you have 12th, 2nd, 10th, 7th, 3rd, 4th house stallium or your sun moon is there. I see also moon in cancer and saturn in libra.

☆ What will turn your future spouse on?

Right off the bat I see that your future spouse will be in love with your breasts. I see everything related to them. Massaging them, sucking them, grabbing them. They also looovvvee how the bra shape them especially corsets and push up bras and also they love how they look with no bra soo ;) anyways. This person is so down bad for you like they are an animal for that part. I keep hearing the song "Addicted to you by Shakira" weird I never listened to that song before but when I described the song to my sister she gave me the name. Also, your waist and belly button. They like how your waist is shaped. I see also that you are this person's dream girl. They see you as the empress, their empress. They like how beautiful you are whether you think it is true or not. I see that they see you the empress to their empror. I also got the collar bones too. Your spouse is going to see you as something so beautiful and otherworldly. I keep emphasizing on the upper body especially the breasts and waist. I see also that they like watching you getting undressed after an event or a party. They like your whole naked form too but mostly your breasts. They also like your size too, no matter how big or small you are they think that you complete them and the chemistry is off charts. I see that you guys may have wonderful sexual chemistry like you two can't keep your hands off of each other. You see those couple who gives off the vibe that they fuck every two minutes? You are like that pile 1 they adore you. This person also gets horny by the fact that you are intimate with them and only them. They get horny or turned on by dim lights and you getting undressed in front of candle lights. Also this person might get horny when you guys hug. They just feel soo hot and bothered whenever you are around. Their love language may be physically touch. They even get horny when you set on their lap too. I see that they might get turned on when you are applying lotion, perfume or even cream on your body they get weak in their knees.

I hope you enjoyed your reading💕.

☆ Placements for them:

Taurus, Capricorn, Aries, Leo, Cancer, Pisces. Also they have moon, Mars, Venus, Neptune prominent in their chart. Sun or moon or stallium in the 1st, 2nd, 5th, 4th, 12th, 10th. Venus in Aries, mars- moon, Venus- ascendant aspects in synastry.

Pile 2 - Woman posing

Your current energy

I see that you might be stuck on someone with Aquarius placements. I see that you have finally made peace with them and you feel kind of imbalanced by that. I see also that this person kept you stuck and out of place. I see also that you are in a place right now where you can't see the truth and you are very conflicted. This confection is keeping you feeling restless and tired. I see that you are fighting internally your anxiety about them. I see that this person knows how to tick your boxes and keep you on edge. Pile 2, this person's intentions aren't fully good towards you. I see that they are only here for fun and good times but believe me it will only end up with disappointment so be careful. I see that this person is manipulating you into thinking that they are so tired and can't live without you but they are not. They know that you'll get back to them, I see that you need to stop giving them the validation that they seek because each time you return to them it make their ego bigger. You are worthy of more than that pile 2. Also, the energy under the bottom of the deck is quite wicked. This person is doing everything in their power to torture you and manipulate you.

☆ Placements for you:

Aquarius, Pisces, Taurus, Virgo, moon in sagittarius, mars in leo, Venus in scorpio, Sagittarius, Venus in Aquarius. Venus, Uranus, Neptune, Mars, moon prominent in your chart or stallium in the 11th, 12th, 2nd, 6th house in your chart.

☆ What will turn your future spouse on?

I got a lot of 10s in this pile so I guess your spouse really feels turned on by the fact that they are making a family that is going to leave a legacy behind with you. Also, this person really gets turned on when you surrender to them, I see a lot of submission. Doesn't mean that they are dominant but they generally love to see you under them. They might be a soft dom. They won't force you to do anything against your will. This pile is quite vanilla, I see a lot of fluids here. They might feel turned on by your sex fluids or they generally like to play with it. They also get turned on when you tease them. This person is foodie, I am picturing the image of Louis and Peter griffin when they were feeding each other fruits in this scene check it out if you want to. You might feed each other grapes and fruits in general. I'm not getting this person enjoying a specific body part at all. I feel like they enjoy your presence during the act more. Also, they get turned on when you hug them tightly. I feel like this person is quite traditional, they enjoy it when you make dinner for them. I see them getting back from work were you are dressing up nicely and making them a very delicious dinner. Also, this person is into sexting. I see them getting very horny when you are teasing them with your nudes. Idk this person respectively is very traditional and vanilla. I see also that they are very mature emotionally. This person get turned on by eye contact and deep conversations they might spend hours making love and they last very long.

Enjoy your reading pile 2💕.

☆ Placements for them:

Leo, Mercury in virgo and sagittarius, Pisces, Aquarius, Venus in virgo, mars in Aries. Dominant planets in Mercury, Mars, Neptune, Uranus. Stallium/ sun or moon in 1st, 6th, 11th, 12th, 9th house in their chart.

Pile 3 - Lady with flowers

Your current energy

I see that this pile is surrendering to the divine. I see that you are trying to enjoy your life as much as possible. I feel like you are living in a routine, there's nothing much honestly. I see that you are anticipating something. I feel like you want something new in your life, something to break the routine without creeping you off. I see that you always lean towards routine and structure but somehow you desire change. I see that you want change but you are very resistant to it which is creating chaos energetically. Pile 3, set with your self and decide what exactly is holding you back from the change? What is scaring you this much? Writing this down can be really helpful I order for you to acknowledge what is wrong. I see that this duality of wanting change and fearing it is keeping you stuck and confused. But at the same time you are looking forward, you are looking for a sign from the universe or God to intervene and change it. You are deeply feeling optimistic about tomorrow. I see that your energy is quite happy and warm. You might have walked away from something that kept bothering you and now you feel like that thing have no power over you right now. I see that there might be a small health issue that faced you in the previous weeks like cold or fever. But you got better thanks to God or the Universe.

Placements for you:

Sagittarius, Gemini, Cancer, Scorpio, Taurus, Aquarius, Aries. Also, I'm picking up on Mars in Aries, Venus in scorpio, Moon in scorpio. Venus, Mercury, Sun, Mars, Pluto as dominant planets in your chart. Stallium in the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 8th, 11th house.

☆ What will turn your future spouse on?

Well first you got triple 888 which never happened in my readings. It means that you are going to experience infinite abundance with your spouse. I see that this person at first will be soft and sweet. They will make love to you softly, they will demand nude pictures of you and they will masturbate to it. They have breeding kink, they will imagine having a child with you while they are masturbating. They are going to make love like there's no tomorrow but as the relationship preced they are going to get scary honestly. I see that they are going to share their sexual fantasies with you. They will ask you to role play with them and the roles are going to be quite dark. Like, they might role play a r*pe scene or something very dark of course with your consent if you are comfortable with that type of stuff or not. With each day that pass they will show their kinkier side to you. I see them using their belt or whip on you. There will be hair pulling too, and heavy BDSM. I see that they will escape reality with you into the bedroom I see them really praising and encouraging you afterwards. They also might tie your hands. I see wax play too, this person is very naughty and kinky I can't with them. This pile’s future spouse might get turned on by pain. I'm picturing Angelina Jolie when she stabed her boyfriend to feel pleasure while they are doing it. This person might get horny when you are in pain. They might cause you pain too. This person is giving Christian Grey, I see that they like being in control and doing heavy stuff to their partner. Idk pile 3, if you might get uncomfortable with that try to communicate with them. You don't have to face all of this. Also, I see that this person will see you as their lover, I got the lover card and Judgement twice which is quite unusual. I see that it might mean that this relationship is meant to awaken something in you, something you are ignoring.

Enjoy your reading pile 3💕.

☆ Placements for them:

Air placements (Libra, Aquarius, Gemini). Mercury in sagittarius, and water placements (Cancer, Pisces and scorpio). Mercury, Pluto, Venus. Stallium in Air placements or houses and Stallium in water placements.

Pile 4 - Woman looking at the stars

Your current energy

I see that there's someone in your life that is spreading rumors about you. It might be a woman with leo placements or a man with Aquarius placements I'm not sure. I see that they feel very jealous of your achievements and how graceful you are. I see that you are the type of person who is very beautiful. You might be beauty with brains, someone who is very intelligent and smart. This person is spreading rumors about you and the cards are telling me that they will get their Karma so don't worry you don't have to do anything about it. The cards are advising you to have inner strength and calm down before engaging in any behavior that doesn't suit your public image. I see that you might be someone who is quite popular and known but very envied by others. Your skills and dedication are drawing the right people into your life and the right opportunities too. I see that if you are planning on traveling somewhere it will happen but also for that to happen you need to find closure and end a cycle in your life.

☆ Placements for you:

Leo, Virgo, Sagittarius, Aries, Pisces, Aquarius, Libra, Leo. Sun, Mars, Saturn, Venus prominent in your chart. Stallium in the 1st, 6th, 5th, 9th, 12th, 7th, 11th house in your chart.

☆ What will turn your future spouse on?

Okay, first thing is this person is very idealistic, very emotional and devoted. I see that they get horny when you tease them with your breasts like pressing them against him or showing them to him randomly make him sexually frustrated. I see that he gets really horny when they see you dressing up for them. A lot of emphasis on glam, they enjoy watching you dressing up, putting on perfume and makeup. You might be their type honestly. Like they were searching for someone like you and they found you soo it is a win win. This person is like pile 2, they are quite traditional. They don't have any weird kink at all. I see that they lean more to making love unlike pile 3 it was insane but anyways no judgment on my blog. I see that your ass is something that they like, they enjoy the size, shape and how soft and squishy it is. This person gets so horny when you are showering or under water. They see you as someone who is so ethereal like a mermaid. They like your body naked and wit under the shower. They might join you there too. I see that they really get turned on when you whisper in their ear and tease their neck. This person is in their head a lot when it comes to you. They might go to work and sit there imagining you two doing it nonstop and when they return home they'll be like a wild animal. He is so soft, like a soft dom again. I can't with him I try to provoke many cards but all I am getting is the cups suit which is linked to love and emotions. I see that this person is very emotional when it comes to you what matter for them is intimacy and how comfortable you are with them. Also, it keeps them going when you are in pleasure. They feel prideful when you reach your orgasm and moaning their name. Also, I'm getting Nikki Minaj here. He'll totally take it off of you after the party. Also I'm getting the song "something about you by eyedress, dent may" this person sees you like something so beautiful and ethereal. They have a lot of respect for you, they won't curse or cuss at you at all during sex. They see sex as something very sacred and romantic only shared between two people. They don't dare to call sex (sex) they'll say (love making) instead. This person is very poetic, they can and will write poems about you and set the right romantic mood for you two to enjoy.

Take care pile 4 💕.

☆ Placements for them:

Water signs (Scorpio, Pisces and cancer). Air signs (Aquarius, Gemini and Libra). Mercury, moon, Venus as prominent plants in their chart. Stallium in the 4th, 8th, 12th, 11th, 3rd, 7th house for them.

Post date: 24th of Nov -2024 Sun

* Feedback is appreciated

[nemo-of-house-hamartia]

"I don't know your name or what I am to do One day you'll wonder why, try read between the lines And you will sing for me the way I sang for you Sing me a song for the ocean to part Sing me the anthem of life"

[dancingbirdie]

Okay so on Astarion, I was reading this fic about him not knowing Tavs true intentions with him and it bothering Astarion a lot, so what if he goes to some mage or magic user and asks them to show Tavs true intentions to him, when he does the vision he sees is just... being snuggled. It's Tav on top of him and the both of you are falling asleep, his hands are under your shirt softly petting your skin as your sleepy self is contently snuggled up to him. I just start crying about him finding out that Tavs DASTARDLY and EVIL plan with him, their greatest desire from him... is to simply be held. 🥺

Hi @goblin-creatcher! Thank you so much for this BEAUTIFUL prompt. I, uhh, kind of took it and went a million miles an hour with it. This is honestly one of my favorite things I've ever written. I hope you enjoy it as well! xoxoxo

Something Imagined / Something Real

Word Count: 3.9K

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Astarion x f!Tav

Warnings/Tags: Brief but detailed description of rough consensual sex, descriptions and references to Astarion's trauma/trauma responses, minor Act 1 and Act 2 spoilers, FLUFF, angst

Suggested Song Pairing: Slow Dancing in A Burning Room (Stripped) - cover by ST LUNA

Summary: Astarion has been suspicious of Tav’s true intentions toward him. He persuades Gale to cast a spell and reveal her motivations. ANGST and FLUFF ensue. A rewriting of Astarion’s confession scene from Act 2.

The sun had just begun to set on the campsite when Astarion decided to put his plan into action. He had waited until Tav departed with some of the other party members before making his way over to the wizard. Gale was too busy reassembling the bookshelf inside his tent to notice Astarion’s approach. It wasn’t until he gave a polite cough that Gale jumped and whirled to face him. 

“No, no, no,” he began all at once, hands raised in a sort of shooing motion. Astarion stared at him in confusion. “I can respect Tav’s indulging in your need for blood, but as I’ve said before: I taste terrible.” 

Astarion scoffed. “Charming. Actually, wizard, I was coming to request your aid in a different, though somewhat related, matter.”

“Really? Care to elaborate?” Gale responded, still somewhat wary. It wasn’t often he found himself alone with the vampire. 

“Testy, I see,” Astarion crooned teasingly. His knee-jerk response to people treating him like a monster, to behave in the most false saccharine sort of way. 

But he drew up short, censoring himself before saying anything else he might regret. He knew he needed to get on the wizard’s good side if he had any chance of getting the answers he sought. 

“I was hoping you knew a spell to reveal someone’s true intentions. Their… motivations for behaving in a certain way, so to speak,” he finished more seriously. 

Gale pondered the question for a moment before answering. 

“Hmm… yes, there is magic to determine that sort of thing… Although it’s been some time since I practiced it…” He trailed off, rubbing his chin in thought. 

“Why are you asking for such a thing?” he asked suddenly. 

Astarion had been prepared for this question, of course. No one did anything for free, no questions asked. He delivered his explanation perfectly, as he’d been rehearsing in his mind.

“One might say our dear sweet Tav and I have been growing a bit… closer these days, but I can sense a master manipulator when I see one. I just simply want to ensure their intentions toward me - toward the party - are true,” he replied with mock innocence. 

“Ah, yes,” Gale nodded. “I gathered as much when the two of you slipped away from the tiefling’s party a few nights ago.” 

“But,” he continued on,”I needn’t think you should worry when it comes to Tav. She seems about as transparent as they come. I’m sure any intentions she has toward you are true.”

Yes, but the best actors always mask their motivations behind innocence and transparency, Astarion thought to himself. I should know. I’ve been doing it for centuries.

After the party’s unfortunate meeting with that Gur in the Sunlit Wetlands, Astarion realized he would have to take potential threats from Cazador even more seriously. He wasn’t about to lose his freedom, not now that he finally had some small taste of it. 

It didn’t hurt to be more suspicious of everyone he encountered, even the sweetling Tav. Anyone could be an operative sent by Cazador, and the best ones would be as skilled as he was in the art of manipulation. It was well-known at this point that the person he’d grown the closest to on their journey was their brave party leader, Tav. Unlikely as it may be that she was scheming for his master, Astarion’s paranoia wouldn’t let him indulge in interactions with her a second longer unless he knew how she truly felt. 

Given Gale’s hesitation, Astarion knew he would have to kick his acting up a notch. Press on that wizard’s heartstrings. Touch the one nerve he knew he was sensitive to.

“Gale, darling, from one literally damaged soul to another, indulge me just this once,” Astarion beseeched him. 

The wizard glared at him a moment, before finally relenting with a heavy sigh. “Fine. Fine. But I want it known that I don’t agree with this so-called solution one whit,” he grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Yes, yes, noted and formally documented, on my word as a former Baldurian magistrate,” Astarion replied cheerily. “So, let’s hop to it then, shall we?”

“What, right now?” Gale asked, shocked. “Shouldn’t we be, I don’t know, a little less conspicuous?” 

“What better time than now?” Astarion responded. “Tav’s out gathering firewood with Wyll and Karlach. They won’t be back for some time. As for Lae’zel and Shadowheart, well…” he paused, gesturing over his shoulder. 

Said two were engaged in a heated sparring session on the outskirts of the camp. Snarls and curses could be heard emanating from both warriors as they tried, and failed, to gain the upper hand against their opponent.

“That lovers’ dance could go on until morning,” Astarion finished. 

“Fair point,” Gale admitted begrudgingly, grimacing at the sound of swords clashing violently. “Very well. Let’s get started.” 

Clearing his throat, Gale began to utter a series of phrases completely foreign to Astarion. He watched as the wizard began moving his hands in a wavelike pattern, forming a circle before them. Suddenly, a mist began to form from seemingly thin air, taking shape according to the boundaries Gale’s hands were creating. The mist grew more and more opaque until it appeared before them like a clouded mirror. 

As the fogginess of the ethereal magic began to clear, the “mirror” became a confusing blur of scenes whipping by, too fast for Astarion or Gale to really comprehend. There were flashes of Tav and Astarion, together and separate, but they disappeared too quickly to ascertain their context. It was as though the spell was shuffling through the entirety of Tav’s thoughts, assessing each one at breakneck speed. 

Finally, the spell slowed to a halt, stopping on one scene in particular. Astarion was struck speechless by what began playing out in the foggy portal before them. So distracted, he didn’t even notice Gale’s tight cough, or how the wizard suddenly became intensely interested in a copse of trees nearby, rather than the revelation the spell was revealing.

Not that the scene was especially profound, objectively speaking. In fact, to anyone else, it might be viewed as the least revelatory thing possible that the spell could have shown. Boring. Inconsequential, even. But to Astarion, it was almost earth shattering. 

He saw himself - he could see his face! - with Tav, lying tangled together in some immaculate four-poster bed. 

That was the first shock that coursed through him, nearly causing his knees to buckle. He was seeing himself for the first time in over 200 years. Or at least, he was seeing himself as Tav saw him. And… the person he saw… Well, he was gorgeous. White blonde locks, curled and tousled in a devil-may-care sort of way. A strong, patrician nose that suggested good breeding. High, sharp cheekbones. Full lips, upturned in a thoughtless grin. Red eyes bordered by long, sweeping lashes. Delicately pointed elven ears. Smooth alabaster skin, without blemish or spot. 

Astarion could scarcely believe his own eyes. 

The second shock to his system was the nature of their activities. He would have been less surprised had the vision shown them fucking. Him taking her roughly from behind perhaps. His name a cry of ecstasy from her lips as he pistoned in and out of her with a feral sort of determination. 

Fantasies of lust, of total domination, now those were things he was familiar with inspiring in the minds of the victims he had taken as lovers. It was what he strove for, in all honesty. Desire like that all but ensured he would capture his prey and live to serve another day for his master. 

But nothing of the sort was occurring between vision-Tav and himself. Instead, they were just… embracing? What in sweet hells was this?

She lay halfway on top of him. Her hair was mussed, perhaps from sleep or perhaps from previous lovemaking. One hand was drawing absentminded shapes across his chest, her lips trailing behind, leaving kisses in their wake. He watched as vision-Astarion chuckled softly, as his hands slipped beneath her sleepshirt to caress her waist, as he placed an innocent kiss on the top of Tav’s head. Eventually, she reached for his hand. They both watched their fingers intertwine, blissfully content.

It was the purest, unadulterated expression of affection that Astarion had ever seen. Something in his heart quaked at the sight of it. He wanted that moment. He envied, he hated, vision-Astarion for enjoying such apparent happiness.

So absorbed in the vision and its implications, Astarion failed to notice the soft padding of feet that indicated someone’s re-entry into the camp. 

“If the two of you are quite finished poking around in my head,” an angry voice suddenly spat from behind them, “I’d appreciate you preserving what little privacy I have left and shutting that damn spell off.”

Mortified, Astarion and Gale turned to see Tav, arms crossed and visibly seething with rage. Gale quickly dispelled the magic with a flick of his wrist. A blush was slowly but surely rising up Tav’s neck to reach her cheeks. Whether from rage or embarrassment, Astarion couldn’t be certain. 

“Tav, let us explain-” Astarion started.

“It was his idea-” Gale blurted at the same time, pointing at Astarion. 

Both paused, glaring at one another. But Tav would have none of their feeble attempts at backpedaling. 

“The explanation doesn’t matter. Whose idea it was doesn’t matter. The fact is that both of you violated the privacy of my mind, which I’ll remind you, has ALREADY been violated by having a bloody tadpole forced inside of it!” Tav shouted. At their words, the camp became enveloped in a heavy silence. Even the crickets ceased their chirping.

Astarion cringed inwardly, knowing the other party members could plainly hear this altercation and had likely stopped whatever it was that they had been doing to listen in. He noted the sounds of swords clanging together had ceased. He was certain Lae’zel and Shadowheart at least were aware of what was happening. Nosy bastards, all of them.

But what disturbed him even more was the realization that Tav’s eyes were welling with tears. She was too proud to acknowledge them or wipe them away. Such was her nature. But they were there nonetheless, and the knowledge that Astarion had brought her to the point of tears was enough to spur a rush of utter self-loathing inside him.

Without another word, Tav turned on her heel and marched stiffly out of camp, toward the direction of a nearby creek they’d identified as a water source earlier in the day.

“I can’t believe I let you convince me to perform that spell,” Gale said as she disappeared between the trees. He dragged his hands down his face. 

“How could we have been so doltish, forgetting that all of our privacies have already been violated with this tadpole business?”

Astarion didn’t have an answer to that. At least, not one the wizard could possibly understand. 

The thought hadn’t occurred to Astarion, he realized, because violations of privacy had been something so intrinsic to his being for over 200 years. He didn’t even recognize it as something abnormal. Like a fish unaware that the water surrounding it is, in fact, water. 

Violations of privacy were a part of life, at least for him. So much so that his request for Gale to perform that magic hadn’t even occurred to him as an overstepping of boundaries. To Astarion, it had simply been a matter of survival. He had needed to know another potentially manipulative person’s true intentions, and so he had found a means to uncover it and maintain the upper hand. 

Belatedly, he also realized that Gale’s hesitation to cast the spell had had nothing to do with being inconvenienced for the evening, but because the wizard had known that it was improper to do to another person. If he had misread that, Astarion wondered, then what other truly benevolent behaviors had he mistaken as pragmatic manipulation?

“I need to go find her,” Astarion murmured, clenching and unclenching his fists in an uncharacteristic fit of uncertainty. 

“Yes, you do,” Gale asserted. “We both owe her a sincere apology… if she’ll even accept it.”

“I’ll see if I can convince her to come back to camp,” Astarion replied, making to leave in the direction Tav had stormed off. 

“Wait,” Gale said, a hand on his shoulder. Astarion turned to meet his gaze. 

“Look, well, I’m obviously not an expert in healthy demonstrations of affection. But I do think it’s obvious from what you saw in that spell that Tav well and truly cares about you. In perhaps the purest way possible. Treat that carefully.”

Part of Astarion wanted to laugh aloud in utter hopelessness at the wizard’s advice. Someone cared for him? Truly and purely? No hidden games, no strings attached? Oh certainly, that wouldn’t be a problem for Astarion at all. Obviously, his 200-year existence as a master-manipulator-fetch-hound for a power-hungry vampire lord had perfectly prepared him to respond to this situation in a healthy manner. Obviously.

But all that was too much to reveal to someone he barely knew and too heavy to say aloud. Rather than giving some smarmy retort, Astarion opted instead to give a stiff nod and continue walking toward the edge of camp. He had no idea how he could make things right with Tav, but at the very least he could try. 

***

He found Tav sitting on a fallen tree near the edge of the creek bed. Her legs were drawn up to her chest, arms wrapped around them as she rested a cheek to her knees. In the waning twilight, she reminded Astarion of some misbegotten gargoyle perched on the roof of a temple, solitary and so very sad. 

Her ears twitched as she noted his arrival. Astarion wasn’t trying to be stealthy. On top of everything else, the last thing he needed to do was scare her. 

“Can I join you?” he asked softly, wincing to himself at the awkwardness of the question. 

The reality was that there was no way to broach this conversation without some stilted beginning, and he hated it. Navigating tricky conversations was normally something he excelled at. But as he was quickly finding, when it related to Tav, nothing in his past life had prepared him to respond to her well. 

“If you’d like,” Tav answered tonelessly. 

Knowing it was probably the best response he was going to get, Astarion swallowed thickly and moved to sit down on the log next to her. 

“I… wanted to… apologize for what you saw, back at camp,” he began.

“Apologize for doing it, or apologize for getting caught?” Tav asked as she turned her head to look at him, resting her other cheek on her knees. 

Astarion balked at the question. Her piercing gaze unnerved him. He hadn’t really thought that far. 

“Both, I suppose?” he answered honestly, although it sounded more like a question to Tav. She huffed a laugh.

“You know, part of me really wants to yell at you. Scream in your face. Tell you off proper,” she mused.

“So why don’t you?” Astarion asked, perplexed. 

Tav didn’t respond at first, just sat there studying him. As if by staring at him long enough, she could project the answer into his mind. 

Astarion didn’t interrupt her, much as he would have liked to. Part of him always bristled when people gazed at him for too long. It was unfair that they could study him, when he hadn’t been able to so much as glance at his reflection in over 200 years. 

Finally, Tav released a heavy sigh, her body curling further in on itself. She closed her eyes as she spoke.

“Because then I would be just like every other bastard in your life who’s mistreated you.”

Astarion flinched in surprise. Those had not been the sort of words he’d been expecting. The truth of them cut deeper than had she raged at him like she wanted to. It left him feeling even more vulnerable, and that in turn made him want to retreat into the comfort of viciousness.

“I don’t need you to pull any punches,” he scoffed, glaring at her. “Go ahead and say what you will.”

She straightened up at his tone, opening her eyes and returning his glare. 

“No. I don’t want to,” she said testily.

“I don’t need your pity,” he hissed. “It’s insulting.”

“Gods damn it all, Astarion!” Tav exclaimed suddenly, causing him to jump in surprise. She threw her hands up in defeat. “I’m not doing anything out of pity! I don’t want to rage at you, because I know that whatever I say right now, I won’t mean it come the morning!”

Astarion blinked. Once again he was left feeling flat footed by the turn of the conversation. Sensing his surprise, Tav continued on with her deluge of words.

“You hurt me tonight, and I’m angry at you - and at Gale, for that matter - for what you did. But you’ve shared enough of your… history… with me, that I realize your behavior is just… just a byproduct of centuries of abuse and manipulation you’ve endured! And I won’t be another abuser in your life. I won’t,” she asserted. 

Astarion continued staring at her, as if she were some otherworldly creature that had just wandered across his path. He watched as Tav inhaled a deep breath, releasing it shakily. She turned away from him to peer out into the forest, uncertain. She opened and closed her mouth several times before actually speaking. As if whatever she was about to say was more intimidating to her than anything else she’d said tonight. 

“I… care deeply for you, Astarion,” she said quietly. “You obviously saw that in the vision. I’m not playing any games. There’s no hidden motive. I’m not trying to manipulate you.”

She turned to look at him again before continuing, her breathing a bit unsteady. 

“I didn’t sleep with you that night of the tiefling party as some sort of maneuver to gain your trust. Although I understand if that was your motivation for doing so.” 

Astarion’s expression morphed into one of guilt. But Tav nodded soberly, as if she had already expected it, before continuing on. 

“It’s okay. I’m not angry. But I’m putting all my cards on the table now, so to speak. Actually, your decision tonight forced my hand, but I had been planning on telling you soon anyway. So, there you have it. The truth of my intentions. What you do with that information is up to you.”

She turned back to gaze out at their surroundings. Like she was giving him the opportunity to bolt away without her watching him. As if she expected him to flee from her confession. 

But Astarion didn’t flee. He remained seated, staring at her in complete wonderment. 

“Why?” he asked quietly.

She looked back at him again, confusion evident on her face. 

“Why what?”

“Why do you care for me? You’re so… well-adjusted. And I’m well… this,” he finished lamely, placing a hand on his chest. 

Tav pursed her lips. “It would be a mistake to misconstrue my empathy for you as me being well-adjusted. Everyone has their own demons, Astarion,” she murmured. “Mine just look different from yours.”

Astarion mulled her words over in his mind, considering them. He leaned forward to brace his forearms on his knees, his head drooping slightly. 

“I…,” he started, unsure. “That vision… what it implied… You deserve something real, Tav. You’re incredible… truly.” 

Tav closed her eyes, bracing for the fallout. Even though she would accept his decision, whatever it was, she didn’t think she could bear to watch him deny her. It would hurt too much. 

“Look. When we met, I had a plan. A nice, simple plan,” he blurted all at once. Rising swiftly to his feet, Tav watched as he began to pace before her, near to bursting with frenetic energy. 

“Seduce you, sleep with you, manipulate your feelings so you’d never turn on me,” he counted off, laughing half-heartedly. “It was… easy - instinctive. Habits from two hundred years of charming people kicked in. All you had to do was fall for it. And all I had to do… was not fall for you… which is where my nice, simple plan fell apart,” he finished, stopping to stand before her. 

She held his gaze, speechless. 

“I want you,” he whispered fervently. “I want what was in that vision… I want us to be something real.”

Never in a million years had she thought he would respond to her like this. She opened her mouth to speak, but Astarion cut her off with another sudden exclamation. 

“I just don’t know what real is,” he confessed, his tone a touch hysterical. Tav knew from his body language that being this transparent was completely out of Astarion’s comfort zone. 

“Being… close to someone - any kind of intimacy - was something I performed to lure people back. For him. Even though I know things between us are different, being with someone still feels… tainted. Still brings up those feelings of disgust, and loathing. I… I don’t know how else to be with someone. No matter how much I’d like to,” he finished, staring at her with beseeching eyes, willing her to understand.

Tav rose to her feet, coming to stand before him. 

“I don’t want you for your body,” she whispered. “Or to perform any acts of intimacy. We can be together, without sleeping together, for as long as you need.”

“Really,” he asked softly, his voice pitched low, rough with emotion.

“Really,” Tav asserted, giving him a small smile. “Would it be all right if…” she paused, conflicted. He eyed her curiously.

“Could I hug you?” she whispered.

The fact that she asked before doing so caused a well of emotion to spring up inside him. Eyes watering, Astarion nodded. 

Slowly, Tav moved forward to wrap her arms around his waist. Her head nestled into the crook of his neck and shoulder. A perfect fit. He felt her exhale a deep sigh.

Tav hugging him was a sensation unlike any he had ever felt. At least, any he could remember feeling. The act of being touched, embraced, without any desire for something more. She just wanted to hold him, feel him close to her. It was incomprehensible to him, but utterly enjoyable, at the same time. 

Slowly, ever so slowly, Astarion raised his arms to return Tav’s embrace. Drawing her even closer, he bowed his head to rest his cheek against her hair. It was soft, like the finest silk. He closed his eyes as he inhaled deeply, appreciating her sweet, floral scent.   

She made to pull away after a moment, not wishing to overwhelm him. But Astarion gripped her more firmly, a silent urge for them to stay that way a little longer. 

“This… this is nice,” he whispered. 

He both felt and heard Tav hum contentedly in response. 

It wasn’t identical to the vision from Tav’s mind that he had seen, but Astarion reveled in their embrace nonetheless. It felt like the beginning of something new. And for the first time in his very, very long life, Astarion felt excited at the prospects of what would come next. 

[taasgirl]

lover - oscar piastri

summary: y/n is a songwriter who writes plenty of songs however no one realizes that they're made by her (and about oscar hehe)!

a/n: the outcomes of the races are fictional, and the order in which these songs have been written (assume fearless was written this year ygwim?). also no face claim!!

liked by yukitsunoda, oscarpiastri, and 33, 287 others ynusername romance is not dead if you keep it just yours! lovelovelove being able to come home for race day!! i'm so proud of u osc 🩷

oscarpiastri I'm so lucky 🥰 liked by ynusername

user27633 Y/N IS A SWIFTIE CONFIRMED!?!?!

ynusername of course!!

user16372 u literally take the cutest photos of oscar

user82537 y/n quoting paris... i'm so up

yukitsunoda 😆😆

landonorris You're my favourite wag

ynusername wow how considerate

liked by taylorswift, landonorris, and 1, 287, 387 others oscarpiastri Unwinding before Japan 👊

ynusername tehee we're cute

oscarpiastri You're cuter landonorris Get a room

taylorswift ooooh she's working hard @ ynusername

user62584 WHAT THE FUCK ARE U DOING HERE???

user98274 OSCAR IS FRIENDS WITH TAYLOR HUH

user61192 i did not expect to see taylor in the comments of oscar's post tagging y/n!

user92898 no fr like what is going on

user93829 Everyone shut up about taylor look at the beauty that is y/n omd

view ynusername's story...

liked by jackantonoff, phoebebridgers, and 55, 918, 278 others taylorswift In honour of my album 'The Tortured Poets Department' release a week ago, I wanted to thank my biggest musical inspirations! Thank you Jack, Lana, and Y/N for helping me the best artist I could possibly be, without you'd guys I'd be nowhere (thank you y/n for writing the cheesiest, cutest, sexiest songs ever)!!

user51862 who is y/n

user01827 She's dating f1 driver oscar piastri but also now apparently a songwriter idk...

user72973 Wdym thanks y/n for writing?? you're telling me the twitter stans were right??

user62863 y/n is singlehandedly uniting f1 and the swifties

ynusername thank u tay 💓💓

user52868 Girl has been living a double life

user51929 ohhh so this is why taylor was commenting on oscar's post😭

liked by oscarpiastri, taylorswift, and 108, 276 others ynusername well now that the cat is out of the bag, who wants to hear a story? i assume u all said yes.

on one of our first dates, oscar made me a bracelet (yes that one) and i thought (and still think) that it was one of the most romantic gestures. so obviouslyyy i wrote 'lover' about him hehe. yes we only knew each other for at most three months when i wrote it, but i love him so much, he's my forever.

oscarpiastri I love having a singer for a girlfriend (wife one day)

ynusername hello cat boy

user18739 You're telling me that taylor's most romantic song is literally written by my favourite wag about my favourite driver?? i might pass out

ynusername haha yes! i write a lot of songs for tay

landonorris So this song is basically about ur delusions liked by ynusername

user52863 oh now i need to know exactly what songs you've written

user20939 AND PLEASE RECORD COVERS OF THEM TOO

lilymhe wait so you've been friends with taylor the whole time...

lilymhe AND THE SONG THAT I WANT PLAYED AT MY WEDDING IS WRITTEN ABOUT OSCAR?? ynusername oh my god lily HAHA

let me know if you liked this!! i know it's super short but i'm seriously lacking inspo and ideas omd. also i literally love oscar so much.

i'm also working on a few reqs, so if you have a suggestion or request, let me know because i'd love to do it!!

[atinystraynstay]

Soft Spot - Min Yoongi

Synopsis: Yoongi closed himself to most of the world. He didn't want to risk anyone hurting him or the people that mean the most to him. That was until you came along, somehow having the golden key to his heart.

Pairing: Min Yoongi x reader

Genre: Fluff, mutual pining, strangers to friends to lovers

Word Count: 1.7k

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yoongi had spent over 30 minutes at the florist. His eyes bounced between all the different flowers, unsure what would be the best one to present to you. You would think that since Yoongi produces music, he felt a constant pressure for the next song to do better than the last.

However, his biggest worry was trying to impress you.

To him, not enough words could describe you. He has attempted to write at least one song to showcase his adoration for you. Yet, nothing seemed to fit. He could easily describe you as perfection. You were the one person who balanced him out amongst the chaos. The songs he produced with you in mind just didn't do you justice.

"Hyung, you ever going to make a selection?" Taehyung teased for him.

A sharp puff of air left Yoongi. He thought asking Taehyung to help him was the best idea, but he was starting to regret it.

"Would you shut up?" Yoongi murmured.

Taehyung went into a fit of chuckles before putting his hands up in defense. Seriously, he was here to provide insight?

Of course, Yoongi had an idea of the right ways to treat someone. He has experienced short flames of love in the past. But nothing like what you two had. It admittedly scared Yoongi at the intensity of emotions he felt within himself. He didn't mean to push people away, but he just often put all those emotions toward his career before another person. BTS counted on him to produce songs, to be a strong older brother. He didn't put another put through the wringer just because of his intense career.

But then he met you.

It started off innocent at first. You two just happened to bump into each other at the convenience store. He had been locked up at the studio, trying to lay tracks down for a new song when he needed a break. He figured going for a walk and grabbing an energy drink would help relax him.

Similarly, you had been crammed in your university's library working on a research paper. You were in the last semester of your graduate program, a step closer to becoming a Social Worker. Your fingers were starting to ache and you felt a bit restless after sitting at a work table. You decided you needed fresh air and an iced coffee before going to attempt to edit the paper.

You two had bumped into each other. Fatigue was written all over your faces that you hadn't noticed each other. That was until you bumped in as you tried to go to the register.

Seeing how tired you were, but also how beautiful you looked, Yoongi offered to pay for your beverage. When you tried to politely decline, he insisted after being in your way. Even though you were the one not watching where you were going.

As a way to show appreciation, you offered to give him your number. That way, you could repay him with a drink of his choosing whenever he wanted.

Since then, you two have been attached. Text messages were exchanged which then became FaceTime calls, particularly late at night due to both of your schedules. FaceTime calls quickly grew tiresome because all Yoongi wanted was to be in the same room as you, so you two began to hang out.

While Yoongi has not officially asked you to be his exclusively, he knew he wanted to be with you. You two practically saw each other twice a week. In his mind, you two were together.

That was until Taehyung pointed out that he hasn't actually asked you to be his, that you could be under the impression you two were just friends. Yoongi was doubtful, but his younger brother had a point. What if you saw him as only a friend? What if you were actually seeing someone else?

The thoughts made Yoongi both anxious but motivated to do something about it. Cue Taehyung coming in to help. Taehyung knew how to be romantic. He offered insight without Yoongi overthinking it.

"I'm telling you. She won't really care about the exact flowers. Just that you got them for her." "But they have to be perfect for her."

It brought Taehyung amusement to see how smitten his hyung was. Actually, all the boys were invested in Yoongi's love life. For the 10 years that they've known him, this was the first time that he was choosing something for himself rather than for other people. They all adored how dedicated Yoongi was to them and the group, but they always wanted Yoongi to be happy in all aspects of life. Including romantic.

They ever knew someone could be so happy over receiving a text message. At least, that was the case until they saw him grinning in his studio as he spun gently back and forth. He would re-read your texts to him, his smile getting wider and wider.

Or the way he thinks of you had random points. Having ramen for dinner? You like ramen. He would wonder if you had eaten, if you were happy, if you had a good day. See a squirrel while on a stroll? You were so energetic, so busy. What were you up to? Should he call you?

You were always on his mind. You meant everything to him and so much more.

It was why when he stood in front of your apartment door, his heart was racing. Yoongi was convinced that his heart was going to leap right out of his chest at this rate. He was practically shaking.

He sucked in a deep breath, looking down at the bouquet of flowers. Roses felt too intense for the occasion. He had selected an arrangement of blue hydrangea, blue delphinium, and white button poms. They reminded Yoongi of a clear, warm day and you were the sun. They were tied together by a pink bow, subtle but perfect.

Here goes nothing.

With his left hand firmly holding onto the stems of the bouquet, his right hand reached forward to ring the doorbell of your unit. It was a late Sunday morning. Sundays were your day to relax, to do self-care. He hoped he wasn't introducing, but he knew you'd be home.

From the other side of the black-painted door, he could hear shuffling. His heart fluttered knowing you were indeed inside. And about to open the door.

Did he get the right bouquet? Did you even like flowers? Should have have gotten a bigger bouquet for you?

He didn't have enough time to go through every scenario as soon the door opened. There you were. His angel.

Your hair was pulled back in a high ponytail with little strands framing your face. You wore a pair of black shorts but a large, oversized sweatshirt. All he wanted to do then was wrap you up in his arms and cuddle you. God, he was down bad.

You had a warm on your face, but quickly your eyes widened to see the flowers in his hand. You couldn't but hope they were for you, but you were convinced you and Yoongi were just friends. He was too kind to you to be anything more than that.

"Hi y/n," he said softly.

His voice sent your heart into palpitations. Nobody else sent you into such a spiral unlike he did so easily. It was just him greeting you but your knees were like jelly.

"Hi Yoongs," you spoke just as softly.

Yoongs. You were the only person who called him that. And he prayed you would be the only.

"What's going on? I figured you might be asleep still since you were at the studio until late." "Nothing can stop me from seeing you. I had a very important erran to run."

He was trying his best not to become a stuttering mess. But the way you were looking at him? The way you had a soft gaze yet lured him in, he was bound to crumble.

"These are for you, beautiful. Saw them and I thought of you."

Your cheeks turned bright pink. You were at a loss for words, and Yoongi noticed. He couldn't help but feel his ego rise. Maybe all the guys were right after all? Maybe you did like him?

He only got this confidence when he had a little bit of whiskey in his system. This was different, though. He didn't have liquid courage to fuel his delusions. He was stone-cold sober to see how you reacted to him. While non-verbal, your body language says everything.

"Oh Yoongi, they are so beautiful. You didn't have to do this." You took the flowers into your own hands to admire them up close. It warmed Yoongi's heart to see the way you took in their beauty, even though they weren't as beautiful as you are. He hoped you were seeing yourself just as positively, but he was ready to remind you constantly if need be.

"And I know what you're about to say." He began. "If you feel guilty for me spoiling you, why don't you accompany me for brunch? Going on an official date would make me happier than you buying me something."

Your head had never snapped up as quickly. Did you hear him correctly? Was he asking you out on a date? There was no room for interpretation when he said the words himself, but you weren't sure if you heard him correctly.

"Wait, you are actually asking me out?" "Well yeah, y/n. Isn't it obvious I like you?"

You opened your mouth to counter his statement, still in disbelief. However, you quickly closed it. Come on, y/n. Don't hesitate. You're so close to getting what you've always wanted.

"Can you give me 20 minutes to get ready and place these in water?" You asked. "Take all the time you need, angel. I'll be downstairs in my car, making sure it's all warm for you."

Feeling bold, Yoongi leaned into to press a lingering kiss to your cheek. "I've got nowhere else I'd want to be than spending time with you." Shivers ran down your spine from his tone and the way his words practically vibrated throughout your body.

He pulled back and winked before going towards the elevator. You gently closed the door before rushing to get ready.

Dreams can come true.

[keepingsecretstokeepyoutk]

This is going to be very long and sound a little crazy at first, and maybe a little mean but please hear me out…

I’m convinced that Taylor sometimes purposefully includes one line or multiple lines of poorly written or clunky lyrics in specific songs to make a point.

We all have seen some version of this with bearding songs like London Boy, a simple bop whose lyrics were immediately detected as sounding disingenuous, even with the general population (the locations she was signing about were the most touristy and too far away from each other to visit on the same day, etc, basically implying that she doesn’t actually have a long term local bf there that she spends a bunch of time with exploring the city with, etc).

But just like everything else on the album, I think she’s doing maybe a more in your face version of that. No holds barred.

So High School is an obvious example of this, with all of the early 2000’s hs imagery, she seems pretty blatantly to be mocking the idea the public has of her “living out every American girl’s high school fantasy” of dating the tall popular football player. With lyrics like “touch me while your friends play grand theft auto” (barf), etc, shes being clear enough that this is not a serious song.

This is the possibly controversial part, but I’m so curious to see what others think about this - I think another iteration of this on this album is the title track, The Tortured Poets Department. Hear me out.

(First, I want to reassure you that there are lines in this song that I really like and think are well written, like: “you’re in self-sabotage mode/throwing spikes down on the road” and “but you awaken with dread/pounding nails in your head/but I’ve read this one/where you come undone/I chose this cyclone with you”. And I fully agree with the idea that these sentiments are from Karlie’s perspective. Basically, when you take out the chunks I’m about to talk about this song makes way more sense and has a beautiful sentiment of undying love behind it - which makes the following parts stick out that much more!)

The first time I listened through the album, and this was the second song, I got terrified because I didn’t understand its place in the whole narrative and when I heard the first clunky line “scratch your head like a tattooed golden retriever” I got the ick. Then the bridge with no structure and no wit and no clever turns of phrase, no metaphor, just “you put my ring on the finger people put wedding rings on” and “that was the closest I’ve ever been to my heart exploding”. So over simplified and cheesy, and doesn’t sound anything like her writing, especially the caliber of her recent lyrics

I know art is largely subjective, but I insist there is no way that the same person who wrote Cowboy Like Me wrote these lines into her title track if she didn’t have a reason and a point to make. To make it clear that this isn’t a matter of genre personal taste, because I know CLM is a very specific sound and a style that music snobs often take more seriously - I love SO many of her candy pop bangers, they are infinitely more clever, articulate, and overall works of art by a true wordsmith than this. Karma, The Very First Night, etc are all a master classes in clever words and tight writing being tucked into an “unserious” pop song.

The lyrics I cited above to me sound like what haters believe her writing sounds like, even fans who make little jokey TikTok’s about her and make up a spoofy something to sing while in character - that’s what these lyrics sound like.

Im worried im being too harsh, but please stay with me because the more I think about the more genius I think it actually is.

In the context of the themes of rest of the album, (her being trapped, miserable, manipulated, ready to burn it all down, screaming to be seen) this theory became clear to me. I think she’s leaning into her public persona (in more ways than one, we’ve already seen it with the stunting), in a way setting a “trap” for her fans and the public, that will essentially call them all out on how they ignored the real her in favor of her pr narrative, making the album about paternity tests, etc, all of which I’m guessing will become very clear in retrospect, possibly after she comes out? (Of course it’s already clear to us now, which is another purpose of the beard songs including clunky writing - to signal to us that these are not serious and that she knows that we know that she knows (like Phoebe on friends lol))

Ultimately, this is (along with So Highschool) a classic beard song. When she writes in this voice, she embodies the most extreme versions of her public persona, not just the one she has cultivated on purpose, but also the one that people have of her that don’t know her (as she did in Blank Space), including those that don’t take her seriously - because her identity as a boy crazy psycho ex girlfriend is directly tied to people dismissing her art as vapid because, they’ve only ever heard her singles, they don’t know the full her.

That voice is the straightest, the most boy crazy, the most one note, and sometimes the most unsophisticated writer version of her that people have in their minds, including her fans - the fans that refuse to see her as a whole person, the real, that believe she is head over heals for big football boy, that believe “he knows how to ball, I know Aristotle” is a romantic line about how opposites attract, the fans that say they don’t “get” some of her most beautiful and well-written songs, the fans that don’t see her and haven’t been seeing her.

They didn’t see giant Taylor on the eras tour, they refuse to see all of her queer signaling, etc, and I think she’s making the bearding songs obvious to underscore the difference between her Taylor(TM) and Taylor(person) personas.

She knows that despite the fact that the lyrics don’t even come close to measuring up to the rest of the album, the public, and many of her fans, will make this song one of the most listened to simply because they are looking for evidence of her relationships from the past year. We’ve all commented on how insane it is that this layered, complex, devastating album is being reduced to the usual paternity tests. This is currently one of the top songs precisely because it is “about Matty”. And of course, So High School is one of the tops songs along with it because it’s “about Travis”.

The juxtaposition of the bearding songs alongside her beautifully written poetry of Prophecy, Peter, Whose Afraid of Little Old Me, Cassandra, How did it end, The Albatross, etc mirrors the juxtaposition of her two selves during the Midnights era.

She has proven the point that if they think she wrote every line of this song completely in earnest, then they see her largely no differently than her haters do, as a subpar writer who writes absurdly cheesy love songs praising trashy to mediocre, problematic men. By eating it up they tell her that’s what she’s good for, for being the subject of tabloids and warring fans who make this entire album about two (purposefully) mediocre songs and the men who “inspired” them.

She has proven her point - that a subset of her fans will be distracted by a lesser song simply because they think it’s about one of the greasy men that’s she been seen holding hands with. That they will ignore once again all of her pleas to be seen, that she’s in pain and caged, and has been driven insane by their willful ignorance. That they don’t appreciate her full potential and talent, that they don’t even see it, and just want to be confirmed in their ideation of her.

This song is essentially the “forget him(her)” pill at the beginning of the fortnight mv, but it’s a sedative for the fans, who are addicted to her straight narrative. Similar to Willow’s 13 chants of “that’s my man” that started off evermore, casting a spell of heteronormativity over everyone who wanted it, so that they could choose to just completely ignore the following 14 gayest songs ever written. Don’t pay no mind to her singing directly about women with zero male perspective - she said “that’s my man!” We’re good! She’s still straight!

Taylor in the fortnight mv had to a take a sedative to be able to go into the next room and write her bearding songs - ie she self medicates to deal with keeping up the straight persona and to get through having to release dumbed down songs to feed the masses. (I also see the pill as something forced on her, I think it represents both layers)

From the first time I watched the music video I thought the writing Taylor looked so miserable and the bearding songs are why.

In this room she’s trapped, churning out the songs that her fans expect of her, the songs that make her team money, the songs that make her money, but that she has to compromise her truth to create.

But when she frees herself she’ll burn the stories that weren’t true, the filler that doesn’t represent her.

I’m curious to hear other’s thoughts on this - have you ever felt like Taylor purposefully inserts off-sounding lyrics that are written in a different voice to make a point?

I want to reiterate that it’s not the entirety of either song that I think is terrible, I genuinely love bopping along to both So High School and TTPD (track). Like I said above, when you remove the clunky lines from ttpd (track), the song has another layer and likely gives voice to some Karlie insight that is beautiful and tragically profound. It’s the red herrings, the pieces specifically meant to tie this song to a bearding narrative, that I’m dissing, and the only reason they are suspicious in the first place is because I know how gifted Taylor is with the written word.

Taylor is such a skilled writer that she can embody the voice of the bad writer that dismissive ignorant idiots believe her to be, just to make a point!

I even wonder if maybe there is a second version of this song locked away in one of those drawers in the fortnight writing room that leaves out the red herrings and is a thousand times better than the bearding version we got.

I hope one day we get to hear it.

[m1ssunderstanding]

Get Back Rewatch 55 Years On: Day Six

Paul and Linda: walk in. Me: Panics in bisexual

He’s so weird. He’s been carrying her purse, gives it back, then tries to change his mind again and the look she gives him. ‘You’re very cute, but I can carry my shit.’ 

But the “Linda’s a cameraman.” Rare Paul feminism moment. Slow clap.

And then instantly, “I’d better go and put in some piano practice.” You fucking addict. Linda, what are you getting yourself into, girly?

“Actually, we’re going on a farm in Scotland.” “I’d love to find a . . . a farm.” I wonder at what point he showed it to her. So far, they’ve done the dirty weekend in LA, Christmas in Liverpool and Portugal, a stay in New York, and now London. Have they done the Mull of Kintyre at this point? Oh, boy. Today might be the Paul and Linda show for me, folks :/

Why does she look like a loving mom watching her daughter’s dance audition? 

Paul taking Mal’s advice on “Standing” VS “Waiting” 

“I feel the most relaxed around Ring.” Linda/Paul/Ringo threesome fic when?

Ringo again with the EXCELLENT taste in jackets. That blue is So pretty. With the black velvet collar. Immaculate. 

“There’s enough obstacles without putting them in the song” is the most Paul quote ever. It’s like his artistic mission statement. The surface read of Paul’s songs is that they’re just these weightless, meaningless, pretty nothings. But the real read (part of) is that they’re meant as comforters, bolsterers, flashlights, and silver linings. 

He does love a good pair of hands, doesn’t he?

He really is showing off for her, though, here. When Linda hasn’t been here, has Paul ever just sat down at the piano and run through all his new songs? Not even close. And it’s so immature and so lovely.

“It was like a comedy, when I heard it.” Proceeds to sing some of the most heavy, blue lyrics. The above comment on Paul’s music notwithstanding, I must admit there are also extreme levels of emotional repression going on. 

“Castle of the King of the Birds”!!!!!!! First of all, who is the "king of the birds" if not Paul McCartney? It’s so extremely beautiful. Achingly so. When I fist heard it, I was like “where have I heard that before?” and when Peter Jackson pointed out that it’s the Top Gun theme? How many songs out there are actually Paul McCartney’s illegitimate children? Like, be Lennon/McCartney with me, for a minute here, and translate this sexual metaphor into musical terms. Paul just jerks it a bit, and before he can even finish, about ten people are pregnant from a drop of his precum and ten magical star children are born who he has no idea of. Does that make any kind of sense at all to anyone?

Honestly love the political version of get back. And clearly so does Yoko. That’s the most I’ve seen her get into a song they’ve written, like, ever. Hey, guys. I have an idea. Maybe you should ask the actual immigrant for ideas on your pro-immigration song. Just a thought. 

 When you’re trying to flirt with your new GF but your ex keeps making you giggle

A vignette of Lennon/McCartney’s writing process. Paul: trying to make up some lyrics. John: makes a joke lyric. Paul: puts it in and it works better than what he had. John: 

John: I’ll be taking me shirt off. Paul: definitely not picturing it at all

Okay but my hot take is that the first two verses at least of “Came in through the bathroom window” are a diss track at Jane. Seriously though, it’s got to be one of my many underrated favs to come out of these sessions. Also, they’re so in love doing this one, my heart can’t take it. 

“This isn’t daddy’s tea, is it?” And Yoko just, without skipping a beat, says, “No.” Girl, I know he’s the one calling you mommy in bed, don’t lie. 

It’s the mutual caring of it all, you know? How he’s sitting in her lap while playing with her hair. How he makes her laugh and she buries her face in his tummy. Gosh, she’s gonna love that tummy for almost thirty years. And while the breakup is heartbreaking, isn’t that lovely to think about? 

George, you should’ve made a Bob Dylan cover album. He sounds sooo pretty. 

Ah, yes. The “Just Let it Be, love. He’s not going to leave you.” Dream Song. Which John does not look enthusiastic about. And then it becomes “Well, you said he wouldn’t leave me, mama. But, you know, he went and did it.”

Peter Jackson, WHERE is that Linda/Yoko dish session audio, you absolute monster! Those are Not small-talk faces. Would I rather listen to what they’ve got to say than hear one of the twentieth century’s greatest masterpieces come to be? Yes. Yes, I would.

[bestanimatedmovie]

Choose your favorite!

Either way, Puss is losing a life here

Vote in the other polls!

What fans say:

Puss In Boots: The Last Wish:

It has a very well done and mature depiction of serious topics (mortality) and mental health. My favourite scene is the depiction of Puss having a panic attack and Perrito comforting him. Also great animation and all the characters are amazing.

The trio of puss+kitty+ perrito was really fun and I loved Puss and Kitty’s relationship. The scenes with Death gave me chills when I saw it in theaters. The animation was gorgeous, the character arcs are very well done, every character is entertaining to watch and it's paced impressively well. Probably the best animated movie I saw in 2022

The animation, the characters, the details, the story, the comedy, the messages, the animation style, All OF IT!

I absolutely love the characterization, the fact that they managed to wrangle BLOOD into the movie was insane to me when I watched it in theaters. I was so entranced lol

It’s a fucking cinematic masterpiece. I nearly cried this film changed a part of my soul. The animation is incredibly stylised especially for the fight scenes, the locations are beautiful and the characters are all enjoyable in their own ways. The music is so good i recommended it to my music teacher on the basis of looking at it for leitmotifs. Genuinely one of the best films I’ve ever seen.

The opening scene is absolutely gorgeous + Kitty & pib's relationship is so important to me. they invented true love. <2

I've been fixated on this movie for five months now and it's not stopping; the animation is inventive and stunning, the characters are all in-depth and well-written, the antagonists are all a delight, the themes stay with you ages after you walk out of the theater, it has the most realistic depiction of a panic attack I've ever seen on the big screen in my entire life. It's all incredibly stylish, the music all goes hard, every single scene matters to the greater plotline, never is a character mocked by the narrative for their weakness or naïvete... I'm not a big movie person, but I've watched this over twenty times honestly, and it's impacted me for the rest of my life.

Shrek 2:

Shrek may be one of the biggest memes on the internet, but this movie legitimately SLAPS!!! This is the movie that most Shrek Conoisseurs agree is the best for the mostly great storyline and it's REALLY great comedy throughout. This is also the movie that introduced us to Puss in Boots! The ending is also INCREDIBLY iconic just saying. 10/10

"One of the greatest sequels of all time. Still holds up nearly 20 years later. It's got everything you could ask for. Diegetic music, a giant gingerbread man Godzilla parody, dancing, death/self-sacrifice, Puss in boots, and, most importantly, a banging song that mixes things up (Seriously, the cover slaps way harder than the original. The alternating highs and lows in terms of tempo and intensity really makes it).

Shrek is a good movie. But Shrek 2 is a great movie. It builds off of the world in the previous film, expands and make it more compelling, while still being a fairy-tale modern tale that critiques family relations. There's great jokes, like Shrek pretending to be from the union, the Fairy Godmother breaking her diet as a punishment for someone else, and a knight planting drugs on Puss in Boots. It's an absolutely iconic movie with THE BEST use of an existing song for a climax in any film (fight me) with the I Need a Hero scene, but also is able to slow down and perfectly capture the awkward first meal with disapproving parents.

[bri-sonat]

Life Eternal

Follow up to Enjoy the Silence

Pairing: Brienne of Tarth x fem!knight!reader

Warnings: NSFW!!! heavy smut, semi-public sex, spit kink, scratching, praise kink, lil bit of degradation, corruption kink if you squint, sub!brienne, thigh grinding, angst.

A/N: i apologize for this. it was meant to be smutty but the song made me do it. i am already working on the very smutty (for real this time) ending, just so i don’t leave you all in the pit of despair. once again, english is not my first language so ignore grammar mistakes and such. once again, very sorry.

thank you to my dear bestie aron @queerofalltrades for proof-reading this for me. they’re doing the fandom a favor.

The first thing you noticed as you roused from sleep was the warm body next to you, her form pressed against yours, skin against skin.

The feeling of her naked flesh against yours was something you wanted to savor. Something to lock away in your memory vault to pull out in case of emergencies.

The taller woman had her arm slung over your waist, your legs gracefully tangled together. Deep, hot breaths against your cheek made you open your eyes, taking in your surroundings.

Brienne was still asleep, soft snores leaving her slightly opened mouth. Taking advantage of the situation, you locked away the sight of her, face so peaceful and unforced. Her hair messy from sleep, blonde locks falling freely.

It was only you who would ever get the chance to see her like this, with her guard down and utterly defenseless. Knowing the amount of hurt she had suffered in her past made you even more proud of her for trusting you in this way.

Brienne had trust issues, that much was obvious for those who knew her. Eyes hiding so much sorrow only seen by those she trusted enough, people like you. She wanted you to see everything about her, therefore she allowed you to look inside the deepest and darkest corners of her soul.

However, that also permitted you to see the most lit up ones, shining so brightly it was blinding. Like the glint that would appear in her eyes when she smiled, or the way they would light up as she ranted about her various travels. The secret enjoyment her deep ceruleans would harbor when she spoke about putting men who had underestimated her in their ‘rightful place’. All of this could be seen, if she let you see it.

So there was not only misery behind her beautiful eyes, because along with the deep sorrow that was written on her soul, was also joy. Joy and glee that was a sight to behold, a privilege extended to those she held dearest. Her laugh, reserved for you only, was the most wonderfully composed aria you had ever heard. It was deep, and unapologetically free, coming naturally after she had met you.

Then there was the laughter that wasn’t as true, the laugh she would let out in the middle of a heartbreaking story in an attempt to lighten the mood. It was silly really, and unbelievably sad that she felt the need to pretend that her heart didn’t cry when reliving her most miserable tales. Almost like she felt that her feelings didn’t matter enough to be taken seriously, like she didn’t matter.

One of these anecdotes had been about the ball her father held. She had told you how he had hosted it to find a potential suitor for her, inviting lots of young lords to Tarth. They had been showering her with attention and had even danced with her. She explained that she wasn’t entirely happy with the arrangement, knowing that she had no interest in marrying a man; but decided to attend for her fathers sake. Allowing herself to be joyful at the regard she was receiving, even if she wished that it was from a lady.

Despite the undesired recognition from the young lords, she couldn’t help the grief she had felt when she realized she was being mocked. Woefully vocalizing her disappointment when she had seen the boys snickering amongst themselves. Apparently this was when the nickname ‘Brienne The Beauty’ had been invented and it reminded you once again how cruel the world could be towards those who were different, if it was by choice or not wasn’t of importance.

“Brienne The Beauty they called me. Great joke. And I realized I was the ugliest girl alive,” she had said it with such spite, giving your hand a squeeze before she uttered five words that made your heart swell, “but then I met you.”

She had told you this under one of your late night meetings in your room. During it you had held her hand, softly stroking it as she spoke, as an act of comfort and to let her know that you were listening. You had seen tears threaten to spill out, but she had laughed instead, an empty laugh, cold and false. Fooling her body in to thinking that it wasn’t a big deal, and was successful in keeping the tears at bay.

She was a person, a human-being with emotions, but people seemed to have forgotten that. Using her as a target for their bitterness and loathing, because she didn’t fit in to the expected role as a ‘Lady’ or a woman. As much as you hated to admit it, not everyone saw her the way you did, didn’t see the appeal of her rugged and masculine appearance, did not see the woman she was underneath the steely exterior. The wall she had built up over the years was fortified, insults bouncing off like arrows on stone. The rough façade turned people away from getting the chance to see her, the actual her. The vulnerable, lovable, honest, and beautiful Brienne.

It saddened you, that so many individuals would lose out on someone as amazing as her, all because of the way she looked. But maybe that was for the best, Brienne deserved people who didn’t judge her from first glance, people who loved her unconditionally and true.

Tucking one of the loose strands of hair behind her ear, you observed as she stirred at the sudden contact but she remained asleep. Resting your hand on her cheek, you filed away this memory, the gentle and tender nature. The memory of waking up next to your love for the very first time. You traced the small scars on her face with your fingertips, making sure you appreciated every single inch of her, even if she wasn’t awake to be aware of you doing it.

Shifting your eyes from her unrestrained face, you took a glance around the room. Jumping from the clothes on the floor to the hearth. The fire from last night had burnt out during your slumber, but judging from the faint glow of the firewood, you drew the assumption that it couldn’t have been out for more than an hour.

You remained in Brienne’s warm embrace, relishing in the fact that you could feel her everywhere. Her breath against your skin, body pressed against yours, your hand on her cheek, her fingertips resting on your back. It was intoxicating and you had to hold back the excitement when you realized that this would be your life from now on, it was almost too good to be true. She was too good to be true.

Basking in her touch, you were quickly reminded of the persistent throb between your legs, not having gone back to your chambers to relieve yourself like you usually did. You had expected it to die down during the night, but Brienne’s naked body against your own had reignited the flame, it now burning stronger and brighter than ever.

Not knowing what time it was but having matters to attend to before sunrise. You gave her a quick kiss on her forehead before reluctantly maneuvering your way out of Brienne’s arms, careful to not wake the sleeping beauty. Grabbing your clothes off the floor you deftly put them on, taking one last look at your lover before exiting her chambers.

It was still dark outside, you guessed it would be another hour until sunrise. An hour before the castle and village woke up, leaving you with sixty minutes of uninterrupted time to wash yourself and polish your armor.

You always took a bath in the mornings to wash off the day before and to start the day clean before meeting Brienne for breakfast. Now it was needed more than ever. The aching between your legs was relentless, never letting up as you took large strides, almost running to the bathhouse.

You knew it would be empty, no one else was awake this time of day. Only exception being the few times you would cross paths with Brienne as she exited when you entered, or the other way around. Her skin wet, hair clinging to her forehead from the steam of the water. If you were lucky she had washed her hair and had it slicked back. It took your breath away every single time.

The times you would see her come out the first six months of your arrival were pure torture, wanting to just reach out and touch her but settling for discreetly and respectfully admiring. However, after you had begun your midnight conferences you would take the liberty to grab her, placing a fast but searing kiss to her lips whenever you would see her in the early mornings. The surprised hum she would release was priceless, her face turning red as you walked away, leaving her frozen in place. Seeing her at breakfast after those morning meetings always played out the same. She had her usual stern and intimidating expression on her face, but you saw the slight blush that would form on her cheeks when you sat down across from her.

Entering the baths you quickly stripped yourself of your clothes, folding them up and placing them close by before stepping in to the steaming hot water. You let out a sigh of relief as you felt the comforting liquid envelop you. Allowing your muscles to loosen, you leaned up against the half-wall of the bath, tilting your head back, legs extended in front of you. Arms stretching out on either side as you placed them on the edge behind you, eyes half-lidded.

Small moments like this, being alone in complete silence, nothing to be heard but your deep breaths and the soft sounds of rippling water, had become your favorites. The time spent with the much taller knight was also dear to you, but they competed not, for they were two sides of the same coin. Important to you in their own way.

When you were with her she made your heart flutter in the most beautiful way, raising your heartbeat significantly, just from a simple smile. The feelings you had when around her were overwhelming, taking over all other senses.

Permitting yourself time to unwind in the bath gave your mind and body the time to restore those senses. Like a reset. You knew that having someone affect you in this way was dangerous as a knight, always needing to be on guard, ready to unsheathe your sword and fight at any given moment. Brienne was dangerous in the most addicting way.

Removing one of your arms from the resting place on the edge, you brought it under the surface, spiking your ears to listen for even the smallest sound that would indicate people. Your fingers making contact with your neglected clit made your body jerk, a quiet whimper forcing its way out of your closed lips as you drew gentle circles with your hand. Making sure to stay silent and make as little movement as possible, so if someone were to walk in, they wouldn’t know what you were doing. You had to maintain an image as a knight of the Seven Kingdoms, and if someone were to walk in on you touching yourself, the entire town had. Gossip spread like wildfire, and you knew that it would be frowned upon.

This was restricted to the privacy of your chambers, but right now you couldn’t care less, you needed to be rid of the uncomfortable pressure between your legs. It was an emergency, simple as that. You knew you wouldn’t be able to focus all day if you didn’t alleviate the tension, especially having to be around Brienne during the majority of it. So this was a hail Mary, all dependent on the peoples sleeping habits, and how quick you could bring yourself to orgasm.

The steam from the water had clung to your skin, your hair slightly dampened and slicked back, face in an expression of silent pleasure as you added more pressure. Fingers picking up the pace, small waves created in the water by your somewhat moving arm.

The familiar feeling of release was building in your stomach, screaming to be let out. You held back a moan that threatened to leave, capturing it at the very last second. It came out as a strangled whine instead, you were so close. Images of Brienne from last night entered your mind. Her blissed out face as she came, her screams and moans. The intense eye-contact you held as you ate her out and fucked her senseless. Her beautiful breasts, and the beautiful noises she had made when you sucked and nibbled on them. All of this played through your mind as your fingers worked harder than ever. Just a little bit more and-

A noise stopped you in your tracks, quickly removing your hand and placing it back on the edge behind you. Irritated and frustrated at the interruption of mind numbing pleasure, you realized you would have to wait until night fall to get your much needed orgasm; this was going to be a long day. Your face was flushed and you were panting but it was subtle enough to not be noticed.

You kept your eyes trained on the ceiling as you heard someone enter the room. Shuffling footsteps stopped before speaking.

“Morning.” You’d recognize that voice anywhere. You hummed, a small smile making its way on to your lips.

“Brienne.” It was spoken softly, almost like an affirmation to yourself, or a confirmation to her that you recognized her presence. Tilting your head down you met her eyes, her blue ones staring straight back at you. Her eyes wide as they wandered over your naked body, the opacity of the water not leaving much to the imagination. “Morning.”

Your words brought her eyes back to yours and you shot a tired smile her way, the annoyance of disrupted release forgotten, just being in her vicinity calmed you. In your diminished state you didn’t notice her wandering eyes, but you were definitely paying attention when she started stripping in front of you, never breaking eye-contact. Her mouth marginally open and eyes as dark as the sky outside.

She hadn’t done this before, always having been quite self-conscious of her physique. It took some time for her to be comfortable with you touching her body, even if it was over clothes. You had showered her with compliments and affirmations, until she allowed herself to melt under your touch.

Even after she let you put your hands on her, you continued with your barrage of compliments, hoping that she would eventually see herself the way you did, and judging from the show in front of you, it had worked. She had grown emboldened and self-assured with the help of your sweet words, and for the first time in her life she felt hot, sexy, and attractive; and based on her facial expression she knew you thought so too. It was such a good look on her, the brazenness, it was maddening.

You watched as she unlaced her tunic, your eyes wide as they followed the path of her hands. She opened it and your eyes landed on her breasts. The marks you had left last night were a hue of purple, a strong contrast against her pale skin. Your throat was dry as you watched her take off her tunic, folding it up and placing it next to your clothes.

Her torso exposed to you, she moved her hands to her trousers, starting to unbuckle them. “You weren’t there when I woke up this morning.” Her sudden words ripped you away from your trance, practically having to force your eyes to meet hers. There was a coy smile on her pretty lips.

“No. I, uh.” You cleared your throat, trying to gain your voice back. The effect this woman had on you was staggering, “I had some things to do before breakfast. Sorry.” She watched you with unsullied eyes as she let her pants drop to the floor. The metal buckles on her trousers hit the tiles with a clink. She stepped out of the bunched up material at her feet and bent down to pick it up. You watched her intently as she neatly folded her pants up and placed them on her tunic.

“No need to apologize. I just missed you.” She cocked her head to the side the tiniest bit as she watched you. Your mind fighting tooth and nail to keep your self-control, you desperately wanted to let your eyes wander all over her now almost naked body, but you needed to be respectful.

She looked down at her body and pouted, an innocent action with malicious intent you were sure, “Oh, look what you’ve done!” Her voice was angelic, so pure, purposely used to rile you up, knowing you got a kick out of the thought that you were corrupting her sweet, virginal soul.

You looked to her hips and saw small bruises of where your fingers had dug in to her skin the night before. Seeing what you had left behind sent an almost haughty feeling throughout your body. “How did you know I would be here?” She looked down at you, fingers hooking in to her undergarments.

“You forgot your dagger in my room, I went to yours to return it. You weren’t there, so I drew the conclusion that you could only be here based on your morning habits.” She slowly, teasingly, dragged the piece of fabric down her long legs, your eyes landing on the mound between her legs.

“I’ve had enough of our near misses, therefore I decided to take matters in to my own hands. And after last night, I could use the soothing warmth. I woke up aching this morning.” She said the last sentence with faux confusion, as if she had no clue as to why. You didn’t think you were that rough to the extent that she would be in pain. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that she had been a maiden, your fingers stretching her out could surely be reason for soreness.

You closed your eyes, the familiar pounding feeling between your legs returning. This woman would be the death of you.

“I hope it’s not an excruciating ache. I apologize if I was too rough last night. I didn’t injure you, did I?” It came out more composed than you thought it would, voice more flat than desired. Despite your current predicament, Brienne naked in front of you, you had to make sure she was okay.

Brienne furrowed her brows, your voice not matching the tenderness of your words. “No, you didn’t injure me. It is quite a pleasant ache. It reminds me of last night, you being, you know,” she trailed off, her tone was seductive fading in to shyness, stopping before she could utter the words inside of me. She just put on one hell of a show, but was bashful talking about you fucking her last night. Even with her new-found confidence, she was still shy to talk about the actual act of intimacy but had no problems referencing it.

“Good.” You let out a shaky breath at her answer. She assured that you hadn’t wounded her and that she was fine. Brienne kept watching you, still quite confused of your flat tone but decided not to dawdle on it, you had your reasons. She didn’t fold up her discarded underwear, instead she just kicked it in the direction of her clothes on the floor, she was impatient; wanting to be in there with you as soon as possible.

She had dreamt of this moment since you first passed each other, it was mostly because you looked at her with such admiration but also because of her mishap. She had accidentally walked in on you getting dressed after your bath, her high honor conditioning her reflexes causing her to look away the second she saw your bare back, but for a split second she had seen your naked silhouette, and that fraction of a second was enough to have her a blushing mess.

That one millisecond was enough to keep her mind distracted during the late nights as she laid in her quarters. Throughout the day however, she would keep her thoughts busy with her knightly tasks. Even though she had done them hundreds of times to the point where they had become muscle memory, she just kept going over the process and the order over and over again. Every single day, until night fall when she let her mind run rampant in the privacy her own four walls but even Brienne had her moments of weakness.

There were times, always over the course of your suppers, that you would smile at her in that very special way, causing the taller woman’s mantra to falter, if only for a second. This allowed the image of your wet bare back to intrude the blondes thoughts, a flash of skin flooding her mind. It was a short interference but it was enough for Brienne to chide herself for invading your privacy. She felt perverted, depraved, and immoral for seeing you undressed, even if it wasn’t on purpose.

Even after your late night rendezvous’, she kept her thoughts strictly professional in public, still having a reputation to uphold. She did allow her imagination to have more leeway, the image of your naked form on repeat as she ran her hands all over your back during your heated make-out sessions.

She was done with the crossing of paths, the morning pecks always leaving something more to be desired. She had even begun waking up earlier to increase the chance of you still being in the bath when she arrived but on those days you polished your armor before bathing, meaning you entered as she left. Finally, you were both here at the same time, no one was getting ready to leave. Brienne’s wish was about to come true, after a year of misses she had finally hit the bullseye.

Small waves hit your submerged form as Brienne entered the pool, taking a seat next to you. She leaned her head against your shoulder, and you wrapped your arm around hers, pulling her close to you. Enjoying the rare moment of public intimacy along side each other, it other wise being confined to the privacy of your quarters. It was a change of pace compared to your usual meetings, almost domestic.

“I was very sad waking up to an empty bed this morning,” Brienne spoke up, her head vibrating against your shoulder, “I was hoping to return the favor you gave me last night.” Your eyes shot open as you felt a hand on your thigh. Slowly moving up to where you had touched yourself mere minutes ago.

Your demeanor completely changed once you realized what Brienne was initiating, she wanted to touch you, and you let her. “Is that so? Well then, allow me.” You grabbed a hold of the hand on your thigh and guided it to your cunt, releasing a sigh when you felt her strong fingers on your clit. God, she was so good with her hands.

She hadn’t expected you to be so direct, shocked at how fast you had switched. She noticed that your daily attitude completely differed when it came to sexual intimacy. It was almost like you traded personalities, you becoming dominant, her taking the role of submissive.

As a female knight she needed to appear dominant in her appearance, otherwise men would walk all over her. If she didn’t, they might undermine her, not listen to her, or respect her even less than they already did. Her height unquestionably helped intimidate people into submission. You didn’t have that luxury, so you had to rely on your other qualities. You were more careful, using your intelligence and wit to get people to respect you, the title helped.

That completely shifted once it got heated, Brienne became the careful one, watching and learning. She absolutely loved being dominated by you, especially after doing so herself all day long. It was a welcome change in your usual dynamic.

You, knowing what you were doing having spent a lot of time studying and practicing in Dorne, would take the role as the dominant one. Showing Brienne ways to make you tick, neck kisses being a thing she excelled at once shown.

Brienne’s fingers carefully worked against your clit, intrigued by the way you writhed and pulsed under her touch. She had shifted her head so that her mouth was on your pulse point, kissing and licking. Her hand was so agonizingly slow in its movements, you didn’t know if it was on purpose or not but you needed release, and you needed it fast.

“Spread your legs,” you breathed out, voice tip-toeing on the verge of a moan. Brienne removed her head from your shoulder at your request, and spread her legs. Drawing her hand away, she watched with curious eyes as you climbed on to her. Settling one of your legs in between hers and one on the side, straddling her thigh.

She watched you with an intense look, enthralling eyes following your every move. Sinking down on to her leg you began rolling your hips on her broad, strong, muscular thigh. Brienne’s hands were sitting at her sides, she didn’t know what to do with them; so you assisted. Grabbing her hands, you placed them on your hips so she could help guide your movements.

Your hands held on to her shoulders, nails digging in to her skin as you fruitfully held your moans back, knowing that the acoustics would give away your current activity if someone were to walk by. The knight beneath you just stared, completely mesmerized, mouth slightly open as she released quiet whimpers at the feeling of your heat against her wet leg.

Looking down at her through half-lidded eyes, you saw the moment she noticed your chest was eye-level with her. Your breasts were wet and the way they moved as you continued your actions had Brienne bewitched. She was as in a trance, her mouth watered and she licked her lips. Smiling sensually, you brought a hand up to her head, stroking the now damp hair. “Is there something you want? You only need to ask.” Your voice was husky, dripping in sex, and sickly sweet.

Brienne looked up at you and gulped. Her voice low, filled with wonder. “May I?” Strong hands slowly started to move from your hips, up your waist, before stopping under the curve of your breasts.

“You’re such a good little thing, asking for permission. Of course you may.” At your confirmation she moved fast, her hands cupping your breasts, fondling them, loving how easily they fit in her big hands. She took one of your nipples in her mouth, the other one being worshipped by her calloused fingers.

A strained moan escaped your lips at the feeling of her talented tongue and fingers on your sensitive skin. Your restraint wavered for a millisecond before you dug your nails even harder in to Brienne’s skin, continuously stroking her hair, careful not to hurt her pretty little head. You were almost painfully drawing your lips together, but she had already heard the inviting sound that you made.

She grew confident, flexing her thigh muscles to harden your grinding surface. It was an entirely new sensation and you couldn’t hold it back anymore. A dark and sensual moan exited your mouth as your hips sped up their movements, riding her thigh for dear life. Your actions caused waves to form in the water, hitting the sides of the bath with a splash.

The blondes large hands snaked around your back and you felt her nails push in to your skin, dragging her fingers down from your shoulders to your lower back; groaning at the new sensation of pain working in tandem with pleasure. The amount of pressure Brienne had applied as she scratched your back was intentional, she wanted to leave marks, just as you had done on her.

The hand that had been mindlessly stroking her hair grabbed hold of the blonde locks, pulling her head away from your chest. She was startled at the sudden interruption, her eyes moving to meet your gaze. Your pupils were dilated, darkened by the over-whelming desire, watching her with a smirk on your lips.

“You’re just full of surprises, aren’t you? Open your mouth, slut. I have something for you.” Your voice was strained, breathy moans mixed with disgustingly sweet fake ridicule.

Brienne hesitantly opened her mouth unsure about your reasoning. Releasing a whimper as she watched you spit in her mouth and at the same time as your saliva landed on her tongue, you pushed the knee that was between her legs forward; making contact with her center.

You mocked her whimper as she released a growling moan, not expecting the sudden pressure. She was closer to orgasm than she thought, having watched your performance had her extremely riled up and she could already feel the same coil from last night tightening in her stomach. You loved the look of corrupted purity on her face as your leg moved with your hips, pressing and rubbing against her clit.

The strange feeling of having someone else’s saliva in her mouth as she was being pleasured made her brain short-circuit for a second as she sat there with her mouth still open, small whiny groans coming out; unsure what to do.

“Swallow it.” The hand that had been holding on to Brienne’s shoulder was brought to her chin, encouraging her to close her mouth. You watched with heavy eyes as she swallowed, her fiery blue eyes staring right back at you. The knee between her thighs kept working her and she knew she was on the edge, orgasm threatening to spill over. By your heavy breaths she knew you were almost there too, so she held out, wanting to reach climax together.

The sight of her completely under your command, mouth open in pleasure, breathy moans coming out drove you over the edge, the coil in your stomach tightening and snapping at the same time as Brienne’s. You threw your head back as you felt the orgasm rip through your entire body, muscles tensing.

The woman beneath you screamed your name as she came, your moans mingling as you reached your zenith in unison. It was passion and intimacy on a whole different level, used as a way to convey your love; wanting the other to feel as good as you did.

What started as a hot and dirty sexual interaction had ended with you and your knight making love. It was beautiful, affectionate, and romantic.

Brienne’s hands flew to hold on to your waist to keep you steady and herself grounded, her mouth coming to your shoulder to muffle her groans as pleasure tore apart her body from the inside out. You felt as she gently sunk her teeth in to your skin and you yelped, releasing a loud moan as you stopped the movement of your hips.

Realizing you still had your armor to polish before meeting the blonde woman for breakfast, you climbed off of her, Brienne releasing a whimper at the removal of your knee, already missing the sensation of your wet skin against hers. Taking a deep breath you collected yourself before clearing your throat.

“I’ll see you at breakfast.” Switching personalities, Brienne smirked as she watched you climb out of the water. Humming in delight when she saw your back, red nail marks running down the length of it.

Feeling her eyes on you as you quickly dried yourself and put your clothes on, covering up the red bite mark on your shoulder and your scratched-up back.

“See you later!” You could hear the cocky smile on her lips as she called out after you. Speedily marching out of the bathhouse, leaving a smug Brienne behind.

———

Half an hour later your armor was polished and strapped on to your figure. Your mind wandered to the session that had occurred just thirty minutes ago and you blushed at the memory. You and Brienne had been bold displaying such physical intimacy outside of your quarters, but the possibility of getting caught had made it so much more filthy and erotic.

It being Brienne who had initiated it made it even more exhilarating in a way. You were impressed and intrigued, she had never displayed such riskiness before. She had wanted you so bad that she didn’t care where you were, the need to hear you moan and to watch you unravel in front of her was stronger than the need to keep it in the bedroom.

You secured your scabbard to your hip before taking a quick look-over to make sure you were presentable. The shine of your armor was blinding and you grimaced, wondering if you had gone a little overboard. The edges of your sword were sharpened and shiny, the grip decorated with various carvings; the symbol of your house sitting on the pommel. It had been a gift from your father given to you when you were knighted, specially requested and custom made for you. It was quite similar to Brienne’s hilt in a way.

Deeming yourself fit to be seen, you straightened your back, opening your door and stepping out in to the hall. Closing the door behind you, you turned to walk towards the mess hall but almost ran into an armor clad Brienne, stopping yourself at the very last second, as she stood outside, waiting. Her chin held high and hands ceremoniously clutched behind her back. The messy and damp hair from earlier had been dried and neatly combed back, she looked so elegant and noble. Her dark armor had been polished, the tiny nicks from hits scattered all over the steel plates were accented by the shiny surface.

“By the Gods Ser Brienne, I almost walked in to you! That could’ve ended in injury had I not halted myself. Announce your presence next time, please.” Looking up at the taller woman you smiled, her usual unemotional expression on her face cracking for a second to give you a one back before falling back to a impartial one.

“Apologies, Ser. I was hoping to accompany you to breakfast. After last night and this morning, I thought we might as well.” Her face and voice was empty of any tells, keeping up formalities in public. You could see her lips twitch, a smirk threatening to break through at the mention of your escapades.

“I’d be honored.” With a quick step you were standing next to the taller knight, and you made your way to the mess hall together, large authoritative strides sounding, your footsteps synced. You formally greeted those you passed on your path with ‘morning’, a nod or a bow. Keeping Brienne at arms length was torture, having to hold back the urge to grab her hand, to pull her closer to you.

You hadn’t really discussed the manner of your relationship. There was a silent agreement stating it was probably best to keep it a secret, mostly for appearances, but also for safety. If someone caught wind of your non-traditional relationship it could be used against you. If someone wanted to hurt you or Brienne they could easily take advantage of your relationship, a weakness used as a bargaining chip. Both you and her were strong, but if stripped from your weapon there was only so much either of you could do.

There was also the issue of respect, your duties were dependent on peoples trust and opinions of you. Barely having enough respect as it was, unwillingly harbored by the men because of your higher rank and title, you couldn’t afford to lose any of it. If you did and your trainees started to defy you, it could have fatal consequences. The safety of the people and your obligations came first, both you and Brienne knew this, which meant neither of you could afford to be self-absorbed and display your love.

So you both understood that it was best to keep it under wraps, but sometimes, like now, you wished you could scream about how much you loved her. You wanted to show her off to the world, talk about how proud you were of her. She deserved to be bragged about, deserved to be talked about with such care and such love, you yearned to extend such a basic act of courtesy.

However, you kept your mouth shut, walking along side her as if you didn’t fuck her last night, as if you hadn’t made love in the bath that same morning, as if you didn’t love her with your entire being to the extent that you felt like your heart could explode.

You could detect the faint smell of her, soap from the bath mingled with the strong aroma of the polish and the fragrance of fresh grass that was undoubtedly Brienne’s. It was a weird combination of scents but it was comforting nonetheless.

Turning one last corner, the taller knight pushed the doors open, entering the large gathering hall with you on her tail. You followed Brienne through the crowds of people, her tall form serving as a beacon so you never lost track of where she was.

You removed your sheath and leaned it against the edge of the table before you took your normal seat across from her at your usual table. She sat down shortly after doing the same thing, her hands placed flat on the surface. Looking at her with eyes full of yearning and adoration as your hand longed to reach out and grab hers.

She stared back, face impersonal but her magnificent blue eyes betray her. There was an almost remorseful look in her eyes, there was no need for her to feel guilt, yet she did. It wasn’t her fault that you couldn’t show any form of affection in public, somehow she felt like it was. Both of you knew that giving in to the urge to grab the others hand would end poorly, it wasn’t exactly an act that could pass as platonic comfort now was it.

It could have if you and Brienne had shown any form of physical closeness in public but you hadn’t, meaning such an act would stick out in the outwardly professional friendship you had tried so hard to maintain for public relations. It had come back to bite you in the arse, knowing not even a quick graze of fingers would be overlooked.

You were the one to break eye-contact, tearing your eyes away from her magnetic gaze. Brienne’s face remained disinterested, eyes looking down at her food and then back to you. She opened her mouth to say something, but closed it shortly after. Words just wouldn’t come out. She tried again, words failing her once again.

“You don’t have to say anything. It’s fine,” Brienne barely heard your mumble over the bustling crowd. You had started eating and had noticed the knights inability to speak. She had wanted to apologize, say sorry for a situation she had no command over, an act you couldn’t allow her to perform.

It was ridiculous how she wanted to take the blame for something she couldn’t influence, something she had no way of controlling. You offered her a small smile as you continued eating, gesturing to her untouched breakfast before speaking, more clearer this time. “You should start eating. We have training soon and we can’t be late.” The tall blonde didn’t utter a single word, she just looked down at her food and started eating.

———

Training went on as usual, assisting Brienne, sparring, trying your very best to not stare at her as she barked orders; you failing miserably. The ‘conversation’ from your earlier meal was still fresh in your mind and you wondered if you had been too harsh towards her by not allowing her to apologize; but hastily realized just how ridiculous the mere thought of it was and that the actual uttering of said words would be preposterous. You couldn’t permit her to ask for forgiveness, not for this.

Glances were exchanged during the session as they usually were, but these were different. There was a stronger sense of longing, a more lustful one derived from finally knowing what the other sounded and looked like at the height of ecstasy. Whether she wanted them to or not, Brienne’s gorgeous blues showed more than her stern face did, eyes filled with desire and regret.

The urge to drag you away and let you devour her fought with the urge to ask for pardon. Indecisiveness spread in her body like a bad rumor and she wondered how long she would be able to keep herself away from you in public.

You took one last yearning gaze at each other before parting ways to continue your daily assignments.

It was during your last errand that a raven carrying a message arrived for you. It landed on a fence post nearby, cawing to get your attention. Approaching the bird as it watched you with its dark eyes. You rolled out the small paper and immediately identified your family’s stationary, ghosting a hand over the familiar stamp of your house.

Reading through the message made your heart drop. This could not be happening, surely it wasn’t real, surely your mind playing tricks. You had only been here a year, had only just felt the incinerating touch of your Brienne. She had placed all of her trust in you, trusting that you would not leave her, that you wouldn’t break her heart. You had promised her that much with your oath. Fuck, your oath. She held honor, righteousness and honesty above everything else, she was going to despise you for this.

You read through the message over and over again, tears welling in your eyes as you willed the words on the parchment to transform; but they never did. The words stayed the same and the fact that you had to leave never changed.

You had to leave tonight, and by doing so it meant leaving her behind as well. You couldn’t tell her, how were you supposed to tell her? It would break her heart, but you couldn’t just leave without saying goodbye, she deserved more. Either way, her heart would be crushed, there was no easy way; you just hoped she would understand and not abhor you.

You quickly marched to the throne room, needing to notify your sudden departure; you had sworn an oath after all. You explained to Brienne’s Grace the emergency of the situation and they understood, stating that your services were no longer needed. You gave a quick nod and strode to your chambers to pack up your things and to leave your love a message.

———

When you didn’t show up for dinner in the evening Brienne grew worried, you were never late. Abandoning her seat at your usual table she set out to find you. Frantically searching, letting her composure slip, distress taking over once she reached your chamber, finding it empty.

Panic settled in when she saw all of your belongings gone, you were leaving her as well, weren’t you. All the time you had spent together was a lie, all the sweet nothings you had whispered to her, all of the embraces, everything was a lie. All a part of the forever on-going ruse to ridicule her.

She had given you everything: her heart, mind, soul and flesh, and you took it. She felt naked, exposed, humiliated. Embarrassed of how rapid she had been to trust you with your compliments, your lingering glances and touches. Nausea settled in when she realized how you had sworn yourself to her, she had high integrity and valued other people with the same honorable qualities as her. Apparently, that wasn’t you.

Taking a step in to your room, she looked around, trying to find some sort of idea of where you had gone. Her eyes landed on a note, it was neatly folded, placed upon the empty desk in your chambers. Large steps carried her over to the wooden surface and she gracefully picked up the piece of paper. Unfolding it, tears welled up in her eyes as she read your beautiful handwriting.

My Dear Brienne,

I wished to tell you this in person, but I could not bring myself to do so, I would not be able to bear the look on your face, it would break my heart.

It is with a heavy soul that I must tell you this, though I wish I did not have to. If I could, I would stay in your arms and by your side forever as your knight and partner. Sadly, I am unable to for the near future because I must leave Winterfell.

A raven arrived for me this afternoon from my family’s maester in Dorne. My father has fallen ill and I must return to be by his side. As his only child, and as a knight, it is my duty to honor my family.

Know this, my darling. I meant every single word I have spoken, every kiss, every touch. Every breath I take will be for you, and until I return to your side and into your arms, you will always be in my thoughts.

For I will long for you forever, I will touch your soul forever, and I will say your name forever. This is unfortunately the moment where we must let go, until our souls are reunited once again.

My dear sweet Brienne, you are the embodiment of beauty, grace and handsomeness. The way you carry yourself is so robust, yet your soul is one of the most gentle ones I have met.

From the moment I saw you I was captivated by you, you intrigued me and I only fell more and more in love with you for every second that passed.

If you are reading this during our usual dinner time then I am still here. I wish to see you one last time before I depart.

I am by the stables until sunset. Come find me, please.

I am eternally yours, my love, Ser Brienne of Tarth.

Brienne couldn’t hold her tears back anymore, droplets falling, staining the paper. She sobbed as she read your carefully crafted words. Eyes lingering over your signature before she ran to the stables, hoping she wasn’t too late.

———

You anxiously watched as the sun sunk further and further down the evening sky. Hoping that Brienne would see your letter in time was a foolish idea, but you knew her. You knew that the second you were a no-show at supper she would come looking for you. She would find the letter, read it and come here. But as the sun hit the horizon, the hope disappeared.

Maybe she had read it but was so upset with you that she didn’t want to see you, or maybe she was still reading it, or maybe she was sitting at your dinner table waiting for you. All of the circumstances in which Brienne could miss seeing you off ran through your mind at rapid pace.

You had given yourself over to despair as you fastened your sleeping sack to your saddle, she really wasn’t coming. A sigh left your mouth, materializing as fog as your hot breath reacted to the cold winter air. You should’ve just have told her, because then you would have at least been able to see her, one last time.

You heard the commotion before you saw it, heavy footsteps running towards you. A familiar sight came around the corner, your heart shattering at the tear stained face. Brienne was distraught, her usual calm and collected demeanor nowhere to be seen.

Her eyes immediately locked on to you where you stood, securing the last strap on the saddle. She called out for you, her voice breaking as she sprinted towards you.

“Brienne.” Breathing out her name in relief, you turned towards her so she could take you in to her embrace. She had read your letter. You felt the familiar burning sensation behind your eyes as the tears welled up; allowing them to fall freely. You nearly threw yourself in to Brienne’s arms when she was close enough to you.

You held each other as it were the last time, not knowing when the next opportunity might come. “When I saw your room empty I thought you had abandoned me, I thought it was all a lie, but then I read your letter. I’m so sorry for doubting you,” she started rambling, words stumbling over each other in a desperate attempt to say whatever she needed to say.

Her voice was weak, arms holding on to you for dear life, “I am selfish for suggesting this but stay here. Stay with me. Please.” The please was gut wrenching, her voice broke, burdened by all of her pain, all her love, all the ache.

You felt your heart break at her plea, you didn’t want to leave her, you would stay by her side your entire life if she asked you to. However, you didn’t have a choice this time. “Stay.” It was so quiet, weak, almost like a squeak, but you heard it.

You had to force yourself to let go of Brienne, looking up at her with tearful eyes. No one had never seen her like this before, eyes red, tears glistening on her face in the setting sun. Her emotions and heart out on display for anyone to see.

“You know I can’t do that. It’s a matter of honor, I know you understand,” you placed a hand on her chest, “deep down, I know you do. For your heart is the most honorable and righteous one I have ever had the pleasure of loving.” You smiled up at her, bringing your hands up to wipe away her tears, before settling them her cheeks.

“Then let me come with you, I will request to be removed from my services and accompany you to Dorne,” you knew her words to be true, it was heard in her voice. She would drop everything in the fragment of a second had you asked her to, that was just the kind of person she had become. The person currently standing before you was not the coherent and composed Ser Brienne of Tarth anymore, it was just Brienne who had let her heart take over her knightly persona, for the first time ever.

You smiled up lovingly at her, you desperately wanted to say yes, to have her join you, “You are needed here, my darling,” but you couldn’t.

“There are plenty of other knights who would kill for my position, they’ll find someone to fill my spot,” her words were clawing at you, hands fidgeting on your back trying to find something to hold on to, only finding the cloth of your fur cloak.

“You know that’s not true. They’d never be able to find someone else that would live up to the example you’ve set here,” the standards and discipline she harbored had raised expectations, meaning if she were to leave, her absence would leave a massive void, and it would be noticeable if some inferior man tried to fill it.

“So this is it? I’m just supposed to let you leave?” She stared down at you in bewilderment, voice so small and defeated.

“I’m afraid you’ll have to. I will never stop thinking of you, and we will return to each other’s arms, for I am meant for you, and you are meant for me,” you withdrew your hands, taking a step back, “I will send ravens for you, and my oath stands the same, I am yours forever. Forever devoted to you, I shall not break this promise. This I swear.” You bowed, a gesture of knightly promise, a formality you knew Brienne would appreciate. It was not only empty words, for honor gave them the weight she needed to soothe her aching heart.

She could only watch as you mounted your horse. Taking one last look at her before riding away, leaving a weeping and wailing Brienne behind, your name falling from her lips, pleading you to stay. It fell on all too aware ears as you rode further and further, her screams fading away in to the evening sky, until the only thing heard were your own sobs.

———

Follow-up: Kisses of Fire

tags for the gang:

@na-shoba

@pastanest

@the-fuck-do-i-know

@mayfair-fleur

[seaofreverie]

Sparkstember Day 19: Lil' Beethoven (Ride 'Em Cowboy)

First of all, let this very important fact be known: the love I have for all three albums in the Lil' Beethoven trilogy cannot be overstated. I think I can safely call them my favourite pieces of art ever made. You know, when you look forward to something and it not only lives up to all your expectations but it's also just SO SO much more? Something about this neoclassical / dada / deconstruction of pop music / whatever-you-should-even-call-it approach is absolutely PERFECTLY suited for my tastes, and I didn't even know I was looking for something EXACTLY like this until I found it.

I think the circumstances of my first hearing of this album are pretty funny and something I got pretty lucky with actually (I often think about this with Sparks in general, as much as I wish I've known about them sooner I also do feel like they appeared in my life when I needed that the most. But anyway.) I was very eagerly looking forward to hearing it and finally seeing for myself what the genius of this album is all about. But I insisted that I can only do it through a physical format because yesss, let's make it even more *special*! The moment I've been waiting for! So yeah let's gooo, I need to wait until my CD arrives in the mail (that was one of the longest weeks of my life). And then I started to wonder, well, maybe I actually won't like it that much. To hype myself up to this extent and then be severly dissapointed - would have sucked!

Well, I was NOT dissapointed. Instead I was perplexed, confused, but also very intrigued and quite, ok not just quite, *completely* amazed already. That was the initial reaction and I think it's a rare but very beautiful moment when this happens - no need to *fully* grasp it right away, but enough to be all like "oh that was SOMETHING. I need more." As I said after that first listen (and I actually have my whole LIVE reaction to hearing LB written down lmao, that's how much of a big deal this was for me), I felt like it actually has to grow on me a bit still, gradually but surely with each next listen, rather than the 1st listen being THE prime listening experience. And that was very true! But it wasn't even gradual, it was very fast, seriously. And something very important that stood out to me right away too were the melodies - something about them, and that continues into HYL and ECOTD too. It's this classic feeling of: this always existed, or at least it feels like I've known it for years already. And as I listen more and become more familiar with them the magic still grows.

It's of course no coincidence to me that an album that relies so much on extreme levels of repetition is so addicting, even hypnotising. And once upon a time I thought that I couldn't like something that's too repetitive and therefore could be considered monotonous or "predictable". But nothing is predictable about LB actually. (Besides... ok, I'll get to that one bit later). But yeah, it's good for the brain. And it's been said before by others but this music definitely has this certain neurodivergent appeal thanks to all this, and, well, I love that aspect of it so much and I definitely relate to it on some level that goes even deeper than just song topics and instrumentation choices. It's in the structure and the fundaments of it all too.

I legally can't finish this without a dedicated paragraph to the 2004 Live In Stockholm performance because HOLY SHIT. Feeling so lucky again that all three of these albums got this treatment and we have recordings of these half-concert-half-performance-art pieces that we can now marvel at. I will say that like, a pretty big part of the sum of the appeal that LB has as an album is stored in this show and its visual and narrative elaboration on its themes. And also it's just so fun to watch! Sometimes I thought about how this might be an even better introduction to LB / this era of Sparks / Sparks in general than the actual album but well, never had a chance to test that and you know. Maybe shouldn't recommend Sparks with one of the most leftfield things there is to be found from them. Either way, very good, very important, felt like experiencing the power of LB for the first time all over again.

So now, please hear my exact reasonings for why I so deeply love (almost) every single one of these songs......

The Rhythm Thief

NO song made such a big impression on me the first time I heard it as this. I might have gotten more used to it after all this time but man, The Rhythm Thief, you will always be the realest one to me. This is what made me look forward to the whole album so much and convinced me that it would be like nothing else I've heard before. And that turned out to be so very beautifully true!

How Do I Get To Carnegie Hall?

I could listen to this one a hundred times in a row over and over and not get sick of it one bit. That's it, idk what else to add, beautiful and ethereal in every way

What Are All These Bands So Angry About?

Mostly I just want to direct everyone's attention to the bridge section, at the 2:26-2:52 time mark, which as far as I can say is the most heavenly piece of music ever made. Feeling like that Winnie The Pooh soul leaving his body gif each time I hear this

I Married Myself

Aromantic anthem, to me. Not that much to say actually but it's just, a very sweet and pretty song even when it might be taken as just this sort of ironic piece, I think it's this situation where a song can be taken more or less literally and it doesn't lose anything, rather the sincerity takes on a new sort of meaning? Because yes, maybe this hyperbolic situation (marrying yourself) COULD be the solution to the heartbreak of failed relationships. Ever thought about that??? Ok, stopping right here and leaving my I Married Myself analysis for another day

Ride 'Em Cowboy

My mind is blank on this one suddenly. But it's so good believe me. I love it a lot. It just has this LB spirit that makes it very addicting to listen to

My Baby's Taking Me Home

This was sort of the first Sparks song I've ever heard, or maybe that I quote-unquote purposefully listened to, and I think that's pretty important considering that it was the moment that ultimately lead to... all this. This song has always been incredibly beautiful and powerful to me, but lately it just makes me emotional to an extent that makes it hard to listen to most of the time. I WOULD sell all my material possessions for even one chance to experience this song live by the way

Your Call Is Very Important To Us. Please Hold

Earns soooo much as a live version, but even without that I think it's genius in the same way as The Rhythm Thief, and maybe the most disquieting piece here overall... If we ignore the next one maybe

Ugly Guys With Beautiful Girls

Sitting there hearing the intro of this song all like "huh, this is so chill and calm... too calm..." and then being hit with, well, everything that's going on in this song afterwards was truly THE MOMENT back in the day (and re: the predictability thing. idk though, it's not like, really an issue). Later on I decided that this sort of narrative nature of the song makes it have less replayability value than the rest (???) but I abandoned that opinion soon enough, thank god. I love it how long it took me to realize that this song and the ending of MBTMH are the only times when drums appear on this entire album (I mean no, I'm not very proud of that fact actually, as the self-proclaimed biggest LB fan in my area. And The Rhythm Thief literally saying "say goodbye to the beat"... come on man). So yes, sometimes less is more! I adore this song now it's such a treat I would gladly terrorize my neighbours with it

Suburban Homeboy

Ok, I'm sorry Suburban Homeboy fans but this is the only song here that I'm not a HUGE fan of. I still think it's brilliant and an incredibly fitting ending for the whole thing - the mood whiplash is amazing as this is the only "vaguely happy sounding" song on here, per my words from months back. And what's better than yelling WE ARE THE SUBURBAN HOMEBOYS! (I'm actually awaiting today's Sparks karaoke rating reveal very impatiently lol the reveal happened before I posted this and I'm very happy about it)

One more actually, a quick word on Wunderbar because it gave us two things that we might have not been able to do without: 1) this whole album actually (the fact that LB exists because of Wunderbar giving the Maels the idea to continue meddling with this style. Up there as one of my fav pieces of Sparks trivia) 2) anddddd the 21×21 performance of it of course

[calp0sa]

ooh.. what songs/albums do you reccomend for talking heads newbies?

INFODUMP INCOMING HERE WE GO

TL;DR: Uh Oh Love Comes to Town, Don’t Worry About the Government, The Book I Read, Found A Job, Life During Wartime, I Zimbra, Cities, The Great Curve, Crosseyed and Painless, Seen and Not Seen, Houses in Motion, the ENTIRETY of the Speaking in Tongues album, Road to Nowhere, (Nothing But) Flowers, and the entirety of Stop Making Sense (but only after you’ve listened to the original versions of the songs on there)

i personally believe Speaking in Tongues is like their magnum opus seriously its my favorite album to ever exist. Could possibly say its one of the greatest albums of the 80s. there is not a single song on there that i don’t love. but their whole discography has such an abundance of gems… i PROMISE their debut album “77” is way more than just psycho killer. in fact i think “Uh-Oh, Love Comes to Town” is easily the best song on 77. “Don’t Worry About the Government” and “The Book I Read” being close contenders. as for my favorite song on their second album, “More Songs About Buildings and Food”, i think “Found a Job” takes the cake. Fear of Music, in my opinion, has to be the most underrated talking heads album…. “Life During Wartime” , “I Zimbra”, and “Cities” being my favorite tracks from that one… now im sure everyone knows about Remain in Light because of “Once in a Lifetime” but i PINKY PROMISE its SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT. “The Great Curve”, “Crosseyed and Painless”, “Seen and Not Seen”, “Houses in Motion” are such damn fantastic songs that have sadly been overshadowed by OIALT (dont get me wrong i think oialt is among the most beautiful songs to ever be written, i just wish people would give the other songs the same amount of love) ANYWAY I SAID ALL I NEEDED TO SAY ABOUT SPEAKING IN TONGUES AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS RAMBLE now onto Little Creatures. oh boy. while i think it’s a pretty good album i don’t think it hits quite as hard as the works before it… despite containing one of their best songs, “Road to Nowhere” (GORGEOUS song) Little Creatures was more of an acquired taste for me, so i don’t really recommend that one if you’re just getting into talking heads. ok so i have a confession to make. i haven’t listened to Naked enough to properly form an opinion on it. but “(Nothing But) Flowers” is a marvelous song i like to frequent. i totally recommend.

OK. OK. STOP MAKING SENSE. is their concert film right? i recommend EVERY SONG on its album, AFTER you’ve listend to all the original versions. it’s a magical experience. well anyhow i think this talking heads talk has come to a conclusion. happy listening :]

[hilsonamore]

Cool About It - boygenius

(this song was written for them to be honest, and it fits so perfectly from wilson’s POV)

I just finished reading “either love is a shrine (or else, a scar)” by jamesevanwilson on A03 and all i have to say is that i cried so much, snot running down my nose, heart aching and my mum actually thought there was something seriously wrong going on.

It’s one of the most beautiful pieces of writing i have ever been blessed to read, and the fact that it’s a fanfic and it’s specifically about characters for whom my love is so deep-rooted, makes it all the more heart-warming and heart-wrenching all at once.

Whether it’s because my period probably starts tomorrow and my hormones are not doing okay or not, this was the most alive and full and lovely fanfic i have ever read. If you’re a hilson fan, i would encourage you, with all my heart, to give this fic a read. You will not be let down, that i can promise.

I think that the thing that made this fic so powerful is how close to reality it came. It could have easily been a canon part of the show and that makes it all the more heartbreaking.

Here are some of the parts that broke and healed and beat my heart up the most.

ALL CREDITS GO TO THE CREATOR, I DO NOT TAKE CREDIT FOR ANY OF THE FOLLOWING PASSAGES!!!

edit: THE AUTHOR IS @suhossineun !!!! IF YOU SEE THIS I LOVE YOU, THIS FIC DESTROYED ME!!!

[thinkingfandoms]

An accurate list of the best movies I've ever seen

This list also includes reasons that are all too objective and nonsensical. Avoid asking too many questions. And share what you think in the comments!

Hercules

Hercules is probably my favourite Disney movie. And I also think that's where my interest in Greek mythology started. Hades is my favorite villain from this company and he's such a mood.

The Prince of Egypt

Oh dear you don't know how much I love this movie. I know every song by heart and was lucky enough to sing them with my choir. I'm a big fan of animation and despite how old is this movie, I think it remains one of the best ever produced. I cried more times over this movie than over all the others on this list combined.

Friends & Family

I only discovered this film this year but it quickly became one of my favorites. I have never laughed for so many consecutive minutes at a movie. I approached it because it's unusual to see a gay mob-themed movie, but I immediately fell in love with all the characters and the final scene remains one of the most comic I have ever seen.

Treasure Planet

I have a soft spot for animated films about great adventures and self-discovery. Jim has been my only animated crush for years, and his story has always resonated with something inside of me (maybe the desire for adventure and his recklessness, idk). Plus, of course, "'I'm Still Here" is one of the most beautiful soundtracks ever created.

Howl's Moving Castle

One of the first films I saw by Studio Ghibli and my absolute favourite. The love stories created by this Studio are always wonderful, and this one is no different. Plus I always saw myself in Sophie (especially about the crush on Howl) and, well, there's Calcifer, what more do you want?

Les Choristes

Another thing I love: movies about music. It may be that I've been playing an instrument for years and singing in choirs, but I've always cried watching kids rediscover a new side of themselves through music and songs. And these songs are composition's masterpieces. I still remember them all by heart even though French isn't my native language.

A Christmas Carol

I'm slightly obsessed with this story, with Charles Dickens and with Christmas. I was born on Christmas Eve so you can imagine how close this theme is to my heart. I have seen several versions of this story though, and for some reason, this one remains my favourite. It may be that it's different from other more colourful versions and really shows the darkness behind the original story, idk.

How to Train Your Dragon

I literally grew up with this saga: I was 8 years old at the first film, 12 at the second and 17 at the third. I watched Hiccup grow up with me as a friend and Toothless as a fellow adventurer. I'll forever be grateful to Dreamworks for creating the best-animated saga that cinema has ever seen.

The Three Musketeers

This movie is so random that it's perfect. I watched it again recently (after like 8 years) and realized that maybe my daddy issues come from this movie: Luke Evans, Orlando Bloom and the freaking Mads Mikkelsen together, seriously? I'm not surprised it was one of my favourite movies growing up.

A Monster in Paris

The love I have for this film is enormous. I could never get over the beauty of the songs in it. The characters are so well written and Francœur will always be in my top animated characters. It's too amazing to be real.

Rise of the Guardians

I could talk for hours about this film and have not even touched the tip of the iceberg. I have an insane obsession with all the characters, starting with and especially Jack, my top animated crush for years. It's all so perfect that I don't see how people never nominate it when it comes to top animated movies.

The Hobbit

Again, I have serious problems with films about fantasy adventures. I have always preferred The Hobbit saga to its sequel because the story has always fascinated me more. And the main character especially: for me Bilbo >>>> Frodo. And then there's Thorin and Luke Evans. You know, daddy issues.

Mune: Guardian of the Moon

Another French animated movie, another obsession, another adventure, another animated character in my top. This is an example of how to do good animation. There isn't a colour out of place. The settings are authentic, the characters are original, and the adventure they make gets me every time.

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

I'm maybe a Muggle, but I prefer Fantastic Beasts to the Harry Potter saga. That's not to say it's better, mind you, but it reflects me more. We all know how we Hufflepuffs (and Ravenclaws) have no real representation in the HP movies, so to be able to have at least one prequel saga starring a Hufflepuff (in which I also find myself far too much) as the protagonist is wonderful. And I have an unhealthy urge to become a magizoologist.

The Greatest Showman

It's the movie I have watched the most of these. I know every song by heart and every line too. It always manages to be a roller coaster of emotions. And it has Hugh Jackman in it.

The Boy Foretold By The Stars

I'm a big supporter of the Philippine's film company. This is one movie is gentle, funny, and not based on the usual drama between Christianity and LGBT+ people (which is what I thought when reading the plot at first). Moreover, another underrated thing, the Philippines' music company here has thrown in masterpiece after masterpiece of songs, perfect for this movie.

Bros

This is my top comfort film in the last year. It's like watching a Hallmark movie but hotter, much more sincere and gay. Very gay. And the relationship between the two main characters is so cute and sweet. And funny.

Top Gun: Maverick

I love this saga but especially love this particular chapter. I love Maverick and his relationship with Rooster, and all the other characters are so well-written. And don't get me started on the story... I LOVE it. There isn't much else to say except that Cruise is a great actor (and a terrible person).

Glass Onion - Knives Out

I love my silly little gay detective. And I have a little passion for movies and mystery series. I found this saga's chapter more compelling than the first one, and the characters gripped me more. Also I fell in love with the setting. Oh and then there are Daniel Craig and Hugh Grant.

[mikqls0n]

I had a smut request from @i-beg-you-pardon-laufeyson but I accidentally deleted it but it said:” hya! I totally love your work! It’s so incredibly written. I dont Know if you would want to do this but if you are taking prompts then could you do a smutty jamie or one of his characters fic or Drabble or whatever with the song “bad habit” most especially the lyrics “I wish I knew you wanted me””

So first thank you for loving my ff🫶 and then, I really wanted to write this but didn’t knew what a prompt is so did some research and hope it’s right 😭 hope u still enjoy:)[NOT EDITED!]

———

Jace Herondale x fem!reader

There he was. The blond hair, beautiful blue/gold eyes and a voice no girl could ever say no to.

Yet there he also was, dating your sister clary fray as this wasn’t enough, she just had to mention it every minute possible. As if she was something special.

You had liked jace for a long time now- almost a year to be exact. The tension between you two was viable and people would ask you if you were a couple, to which you always replied with a simple “no”, not giving jace a chance to say anything. Although he always would look disappointed with your answer, which you clearly never saw.

Now you were here in your room- in the institute as clary talked your full of how annoying jace was and that he acts like he doesn’t even love her.

“I mean y/n, can you maybe talk to jace? I don’t know what to say, I can’t just go to him and be like “hey jace do you really love me?” Like that’s embarrassing” she said to me.

“Um- clary I really think you should talk to him yourself about things like that-“

“Please! I Just Can’t ok, he’s kind of ignoring me these past days I don’t think he will talk to me now, so please. And I’ve been noticing you’ve got pretty close with him huh”

“Are you jealous?” I asked her as her face expression already told me the answer.

“Wh-what no!” She laughed.

“Okay, whatever. Fine I will talk to jace about it but only because you’re my sister..”

“Thank You!” She hugged me and I wrapped my arms around her too.

———

You definitely were not going to talk to jace about clary.

“Jace?” I knocked on his door.

There was silence at first until you heard the door open and you were met with jace.

“What do you want?” He asked, his voice almost making you forgot of why you’re even here.

“I- uhm, can we talk?”your voice stuttered.

“Yeah sure, come in” he held the door open for you as you step into his room when jace looked the door.

“So what is it that you wanna talk about?”you both sat on the edge of his bed. Jace leaning his back against the wall while you were sitting in front of him.

“Uhm..” you didn’t know what to say, as you were literally about to confess your feelings to the boy who has a girlfriend- which happens to be your sister too.

“What? Why are you getting so red?” He smirked as you turned your face to the side, brushing it off with a laugh.

“No but seriously, what is it?”

I can’t do this.”um so clary said-“ he cuts your off.

“Can we please, not talk about clary?” He asked.

“What- why? She told me that you’ve been distanced from her and doesn’t know why”he sighed as he liked his lips before sitting up straight.

“You’re so blind y/n…” you both could feel the tension in the room between you two.

“I- I really should go, to clary..” you quickly stood up and as you were about to open the door you were being turned around and pushed against the door as you felt a pair of soft lips against yours.

You didn’t even realised what has happened so quick but also didn’t hesitate to wrap your arms around jace’s neck and pulling him closer to you.

“Jace, we can’t clary-“

“I don’t give a shit about clary, didn’t she tell you we broke up weeks ago? Fuck y/n I’ve always loved you. You just never gave me a chance to show you that..” you didn’t answer as you pulled his lips to yours again.

Jace slowly picked you up from the ground and wrapped your legs around his waist as he walked over to his bed.

Your back falling down onto the mattress as jace climbs on top of you and immediately attached his lips to your neck.

“Jace” you moaned as he sucked on the soft skin while he slowly rocked his hips against yours.

Your hand goes up to his blonde hair as you turned your head, giving him a better view of your neck.

“Please jace, I want you” you whine as you bucked up your hips to his, wanting to feel something of him.

He pulled his lips away from you neck as he stood up and unbuckled his belt and took off his black jeans, followed with his boxers, revealing his already hard cock as he took off his shirt too when he got on the bed again.

“You want me so bad?” He flipped you over so you were sat on top of him as he laid down on his back

“Go on, im all yours” He said as you took off your clothes before sitting on dick,gaining some friction when slight moans came out of jace’s mouth as his hands were placed on your hips moving your hips slightly back and forth making you grab the headboard.

“Is the door looked?” You asked as jace’s movements stopped, the need to be inside you growing.

“Yes, yes it’s locked now please- ah fuckkkk..” you had lined him up to you so you could smoothly slide him into you when You let yourself fall down onto him, causing his whole length to be buried inside you as you let out a gasp at the size oh him being inside you.

“Fuck it..”jace mumbled as his grip got stronger on your waist and he flipped you both over again as he waisted no time and began to pound into you, hitting you g spot over and over again.

“Jace, im- im..”the pleasure beginning to take over you as jace lips found its way to your neck again.

You wrapped your legs around jace waist pulling him deeper inside you with every thrust.

“Fuck y/n, I wish I knew you wanted me earlier , I would’ve done this months ago” you both felt your orgasm getting closer to the edge as the feeling of you clenching around jace’s cock, and the twitch of him inside you made it worse as you both couldn’t hold it anymore and your warm cum mixed together as jace collapse on top of you, still inside you filling you up.

You didn’t know how clary would react if she would find out about this, but you sure know, you will never regret this.

[mimikittysblog]

✨MimiKitty's 2023 Fic Wrapped✨

So as a fun activity my friends all decided to make a 2023 wrapped ppt! So I decided to make one for all the fics I read in 2023! (I didnt get to present it btw lol)

I put what I decided to be my top fics for each month! Whether it be because of amazing writing, gut wrenching angst, sickeningly cute fluff or nastiest smut I decided to put it as my favorite fic for that month!

NOTE: Some of these were not exactly written/published in the month that I put them in but it was when I read and/or reblogged it!

Now without any further ado! Here is my 2023 Fic wrapped!

January

Happiness by @end-hyphen

Why is painter hoon so attractive???? 😭 The angst in this fic is SO GOOD! Its just really memorable and I love the ending too! ALSO THE PLOT TWISTS?!?! I was gagged yo. I was gripping my phone when I was reading this!!! It's just a really beautiful well written fic! Loooove it so much!!

February

In Another Life by @httphannie

First of all the smut was great!! Loved it! But maaann THE ANGST THROUGH OUT THE WHOLE FIC IS SO GOOD!! The ending is one of the most tear jerking, gut wrenching, heart breaking, soul crushing endings I've ever read. SEUNGCHEOL!! YOU SHOULD'VE JUST FUCKIN ESCAPED PLEASEEEE! I remember BAWLING when I first read it, and ✨surprise surprise✨ I cried again just recently when I reread it again. Its so beautifully written, I get every emotion thats poured into this fic and the story itself is so good and unique in a way I just love it! (also kinda funny but love how this is the only SVT fic that made it on this list 😂😂😂)

March

More than This by @heesbaby

KITTY JAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Thats all.

But in all seriousness, this is a wonderful smau!! I loved every bit of it!! Its so cute and soft! Jay is so BABY KITTY 🥹🥹🥹 I love him to bits! And the funny parts are also so funny! The smut is also good but to me its also so cute too! ALSO THE ANTAGONIST MAKES ME WANT TO COMMIT ARSON HOW DARE SHE HURT MY PRETTY BBY JAY!!! But when a fic gets me reacting like that you know its good! Overall an amazing smau! Love love!

April

The Archer and His Queen by @forjongseong

ARCHER JAY GOT ME ACTING UP DUDEEEE!!! The thought its so hot but you wanna know whats hotter??? HOW RESPECTFUL HE IS THROUGH OUT THIS FIC!! He truly respects his Queen and then truly falls in love with her?!? I CANNOT! Also I like how unique it is! In a way that Jay isn't a knight, not a prince, not a king, not just like a commoner, but an archer. Idk I just like how different it is, how often is it to have the love interest be an archer? (I'm sure pretty common but I rarely see it hehe) plus.. again, thats hot 🥰 The smut is so gooooood!! and the ending is adorable!

May

Ship Happens by @/tfwheeseung

MERMAID JAKE!!!!! Like. MERMAID! JAKE!! Now this story, I don't think any of you can read it anymore? as tfwheeseung (lily) has deactivated. So thats a shame, but if theres a way you can read it please do!! Its so cute and so funny! Jake is like a mermaid pup combined he's adorable here!! HE JUST WANTED TO CATCH YOU A FISH!!! How adorable is that?! Its just a simple and adorable fic that I cant stop giggling about every time I think about it!

June

Angels Like You by @ham-st4r

OH THIS ONE IS SOOOOOOO GOOOOOD!! DUDE THE HEART BREAK I FELT FOR HEESEUNG IN THIS FIC AAAAAAA!!

“I believed that you had changed, I really did,” // “I gave you my heart” // "I trusted you with my body,” //“I-I loved you”

Heart breaking dude 😭😭😭 Like how dare the reader break this soft boys heart!! BUT THE ENDING IS SO BEAUTIFUL!!! LIKE AAAA!! I shed some tears!! Overall I truly absolutely adooooree this fic!!! Plus reading it while listening to the song makes you cry harder 👍

July

Hype Boy by @onlyjaeyun

DOMESTIC JAKE!!! Bro Jakes backstory man 😔😔😔 I've never heard of anything sadder like I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM AND HIS ADORABLE AND ANGEL OF A BABY BROTHER! I adore the Sim brothers so much and I will do anything I can to protect them AAAAAAAAAA!!!! Hype Boy is such an adorable and sad smau but it ends so beautifully! Jake has an amazing support system in this smau and just the love he has for his baby brother and the reader is unmatched I love love love!!

August

Rule Number 1: Don't Fall in Love by @jaylaxies

Dude idk why I love fake dating tropes, especially when its to get revenge! So I was hooked from the beginning!!! So HAHAHAH GET FUCKED HOON! Jake is SUCH A GREEN FLAG THROUGH OUT THIS ENTIRE THING ITS GORGEOUS TO READ!!!! Also Undercut Jake?!?!? 🤭 yes pleaseeeeee!! also this one?? the smut?? oh yeah it is NASSTYYYYY IN A GOOD WAY AND I LOVE THATT!! But the aftercare is just perfect!! This is a reaaaalllyy good fic that I always find myself constantly rereading!

September

Poison by @onlyjaeyun

Oh wow another onlyjaeyun smau??? well duh when this on is just AN ABSOLUTE MASTERPIECE!!!! LIKE OOOHH MY GOD IS THIS ONE AMAZING! Like heeseung is so... AKJSJS I HAVE NO WORDS 😭 The fact he actually gets off on the readers pleasure??? HOT BRO. And how can I not put this as the best thing I read during september when it has lines like THIS:

"I've never wanted anyone as much as I want you, princess" // "I just can't break this promise, Sunghoon is my everything",

"and what about me? What am I to you?"

"My most precious treasure."

Do I need to explain further??? Yeah. I thought so 😊

October

Come Back to Me by @enhaheeseung

This entire series was a rollercoaster of a read. Like the way I went from "FUCK YOU HEESEUNG!" to "NO WAIT TAKE HIM BACK" to "YES GO HEESEUNG GO!!" to "HEESEUNG YOU DICKHEADDD" to "Oh god you poor thing" to "Omg yay! theyre together 🥰" is absolutely amazing!! As this was a series, every time I saw a notification for the next part of this fic showed up I immeeeediately read it! Caused me to be late for work a couple of times but it was worth it 👍👍👍👍. It's written really well! I just love this story and how it makes my heart clench and have me at the edge of my seat! Just amazing!

November

Verboten by @heesbaby

YES. JUST AN ABSOLUTE YES!! This smau is SO FRICKIN GOOD! Daddy Heeseung?? like duh yes please! But even before then reader got to play around with 02z 🤭🤭🤭🤭 so that was fun! and what made me love this one so much was also HOW FUNNY IT IS??? Like Cinna I don't think we give you enough credit youre like- SO FUNNY?? How you even thought of having Niki doxx Jake I'll never know but it's just so funny and I'll forever laugh at that thought. But this smau is also just so frickin fluffy at times! the relationship heeseung has with the reader is so fucking healthy, I'm actually jealous. I loved this smau very very much!

December

Strictly Business by @onlyjaeyun

And a surprise to absolutely no one!!! Of course Zadie's third smau had to be on here! NOT MY FAULT SHE MAKES AMAZING STORIES!!! Plus Jay??? as a CEO??? WHAT CAN BE HOTTERRRRR?!?! Of course it's automatically my favorite!!! But besides that Jay is just... so amazing!! He'll literally do ANYTHING for the reader and thats so fucking endearing! My mans in love your honor! We love a rich man who's in love! Find me a man like that please! Besides that the smut is amazing yo, and the ddlg parts 🤭🥰🤭🥰 got me kicking my feet and twirling my hair bro!! It's really no surprise how amazing this one is! especially with how sweet and amazing everyone is (besides some of the antagonists of course!) 100000/10 smau! truly!

And that was my 2023 fic wrapped!!! Also Honorable mentions to these specific creators and fics cause I also REALLY LOVED THEM! I just had to mention them:

@ham-st4r for Wrong Doings

@enhaheeseung for Nobodies

@strzlun for Midnight

@yunjardi for Double Trouble

@luvyeni for Forever and Always

@shanbinswf for Brand New Moves

@yeonjunszn for So Sick

@kitten4sannie for Space in Between

@yoursjaeyun for Endless Love

Thank you to everyone who wrote all these amazing stories! You all really make my days better! I hope you all continue to write for 2024!! I also wish 2024 will be kinder to you! Love you all! 💕

[thevalleyisjolly]

Some Eärendil and Elwing headcanons because I love them:

It took a long time for Eärendil to start singing again after Gondolin, and it was mostly sea shanties and Mortal tunes.  Only in private and only with Elwing (and later, his sons) would he sing in Quenya the songs of his childhood in Gondolin.

When Elwing was 12, she decided that she wanted to be a great seafaring explorer and sail all the way around Middle-earth.  Her hopes were rather harshly dashed when she stepped foot on a ship to pay Círdan a short visit on Balar and discovered that she suffered from terrible motion sickness.  Eärendil gallantly vowed to go on the adventures instead and come back to tell her all about them.

Elwing is just a little bit taller than Eärendil.  He quite likes it, even though it’s not a very great difference.

Eärendil is fantastic at sewing, and has a good eye for embroidery as well.  When he has downtime on Vingilot, he creates beautiful patterns and designs on tunics, handkerchiefs, shawls.  The crew of Vingilot was the most well-outfitted crew to ever sail the Sundering Seas, and he’d always make sure to bring back little embroidered patches with scenes from his voyages, which first Elwing and then the twins would add onto an ever-growing quilt.

Elwing learned how to make lembas from Idril, but for Eärendil’s journeys, she bakes him hardtack in the Mortal fashion.  He likes to make “pudding” out of it with sugar and water.

Elwing loves math, and is very good at it.  By the time she was ten, she could do complex calculations in her head in a matter of seconds that Elven scholars thousands of years her senior would need several minutes and a writing surface to do.  She didn’t have the time or resources to seriously study it while she was in Middle-earth, but in Aman, she does a correspondence course with one of the universities in Alqualondë and promptly has to deal with a whole hoard of mathematicians coming from all over the Blessed Realm to her tower wanting to learn from her.

In their own home, they speak a mixture of Quenya, Sindarin, and Taliska with each other.  They also have a secret written code that they came up with as children, which they leave little love notes for each other in.

Neither of them have ever learned to ride a horse.  Eärendil has fuzzy memories of being put on his grandfather’s saddle for a gentle trot when he was young and the Gondolindrim assure him that he once briefly had a pony, but there were very few steads or mounts at Sirion. Frankly, both of them find horses a little bewildering.

The twins were a surprise because they’d been aiming for triplets.  Mostly just to see if that was even possible, and also because neither of them had ever been pregnant before and didn’t truly understand what it would be like to carry and birth triplets.

Despite the harps of gold they brought to him, Eärendil does not actually play the harp very well.  He’s not fond of wearing white either because he thinks it’s too hard to keep clean.  Elwing looks very good in white, but it’s a mourning colour and she generally prefers warmer yellows and oranges.

Eärendil’s favourite colour is the soft silver of Elwing’s hair, and Elwing’s favourite colour is the warm gold of Eärendil’s hair.  Their favourite wedding present was a tapestry woven by some of Idril’s ladies depicting the intermingled light of Telperion and Laurelin in those exact shades.

Elwing is a vegetarian.  Eärendil isn’t, mostly for practical reasons onboard a ship with limited supplies, but is happy to eat vegetarian when he’s at home.  The real challenge at mealtimes came from Elros being a picky eater and Elrond having a seafood allergy.

There is an outdoor bathhouse at Elwing’s tower because Silmaril glitter is absolutely impossible to get rid of once it’s in the house.  The grout in the tiling there has become permanently shiny, despite their combined best efforts at scrubbing.