#self-compassion.

[lotuspositivity]

You don't have to force yourself to bounce back so quickly. I read something recently that said "when you come in from a rainstorm, you don't expect yourself to be dry and warm right away", and it really resonated with me. It's okay to take time to dry off and warm up. Take the time you need to process what happened to you.

[thepeacefulgarden]

[curingourhearts]

It's okay to 'grieve' things that aren't just death. I've allowed myself to grieve a friendship ending, a situationship, losing something important to me, etc. It's okay to give yourself time to process the loss of something. Grief looks different for everyone, try to find a way that works for you to help make it easier for you.

[shamelesslyimpurrfect]

(X)

[ed-recoverry]

Reminder that caregivers of children are, by definition, supposed to provide shelter, food, and clothing. They did not do you a huge favor by providing this. It was the bare minimum of the job description that they voluntarily signed up for. You are not indebted to your caregivers for giving you the very basics.

[thelatestkate]

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[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

[biblicallyaccuratemoth]

Before I realized I was Trans, I had this intense...longing for a life I felt I couldn't have. And eventually that somber sonder crystalized into a nugget of self-loathing, and this idea that the reason I wasn't allowed to be a girl was because I was being 'punished' somehow.

Absolutely nobody deserves to hate themselves. Relearning self-love is hard, and I know so many Trans people who are working on it. And it's important to keep working on it. You are worthy of love.

[selfcare-journey]

Just because you don't have a "thing" to show for all your hard work, does not mean you weren't working very hard. Plenty of things like clarity, knowledge, or balance, are not tangible, but very worthwhile

[desultory-suggestions]

Even if your body isn’t what you wish it were, you can still treat it with the respect it deserves. While it’s completely fine to dream of certain goals and changes for yourself, it’s equally important to learn to appreciate your body for what it is right now. Don’t try to fuel yourself on self hatred.

[lotuspositivity]

You aren't ungrateful just because you're frustrated with your situation. You can feel upset while still being grateful for what you have. Two things can be true at the same time.

[thepeacefulgarden]

And remember, they don't have to hit you in order to qualify as an abuser. Do they...

Say mean and/or creepy things and then try to walk it back as "just a joke?"

Tell you that you're "too sensitive" when you call out their words or behavior?

Use the Bible, the Quran, the Torah, the Vedas, or any other religious text to justify mistreating you?

Treat you badly, apologize, promise never to do it again, and proceed to do it again?

Try to control where you go, how you dress, who you see and talk to, what and how much you eat, etc.?

Snoop through your phone, emails, belongings, or other private stuff without your OK? Or manipulate you into "letting" them do so?

Track your menstrual cycle (if you have one) without your OK? Or manipulate you into "letting" them do so?

Try to make you keep a pregnancy you don't want (or terminate one you do)? Or try to dictate what (if any) birth control you use?

Threaten to hurt themselves or other people if you leave, or "step out of line?"

Break or throw things when they're upset?

Punch holes in walls, doors, etc.?

Make you (or try to make you) engage in sexual acts you don't enjoy, don't feel ready for, don't feel comfortable with, or just plain aren't in the mood for?

Try to make you feel like a bad person for saying "no" to sex?

Try to distance you from your friends and family?

Actively try to turn your friends and family against you? Or you against them?

Get mad when you say no or try to set a boundary?

Call you degrading names?

Use your insecurities against you?

"Neg" or "should" you into conforming to their preferences?

Try to get you to quit your job, or get you fired?

Use drugs, alcohol, a bad day at work, or whatever their deal is as an excuse for their behavior? If so, you need to get out. Now. Make a plan. I promise, it doesn't get better as long as you are in this relationship. You cannot love the red flags out of people. Even if they don't hit you now, there's a good chance they'll start sooner or later; abuse has a nasty tendency to escalate.

[curingourhearts]

self-improvement should be because you want to improve your quality of life, not because you feel or think you *need* to be better in order to be loved or allowed to live. there's no end goal with self-improvement, it's easy to dig yourself a grave when you don't realize that you're not on a ticking clock to be the 'best version of yourself'. all you need to strive to do is be the version of yourself you are the most happy with. find out what values you find important, what kind of friend do you want to be, how do you want to react to things. what are things that would improve the way you go about life? what would make life easier, better and more enjoyable for you?

[shamelesslyimpurrfect]

(X)

[ed-recoverry]

“The year is almost over and I did nothing!”

Okay, well did you…

Finish a book?

Make a home cooked meal?

Get a new job?

Get a promotion?

Finish another semester of school?

Get your GED/high school diploma?

Get your associates, certification, degree, masters, and or doctorate?

Take an online class?

Finish a project?

Start a new hobby?

Start a new book?

Talk to a new person?

Made a new friend?

Went to something you didn’t want to?

Write a new story?

Start journaling?

Start to dress different?

Start learning a new skill?

Go to the doctor?

Fix your sleep schedule?

Rekindle a relationship?

Go on a date?

Get help?

Ask for help?

Apologize?

Make amends?

Stay sober (even for a few days)?

Stay clean (even for a few days)?

Donate to charity?

Volunteer?

Try something new?

Travel somewhere new?

Do something you were dreading?

Do something you were scared of?

Start showering regularly?

Start brushing your teeth regularly?

Come out?

Go to therapy?

Admit you need help?

Start regularly walking?

Finally find the right combination of meds?

Finally get a diagnosis?

Create a morning routine?

Stick to a morning routine?

Create a nighttime routine?

Stick to a nighttime routine?

Start spending allotted time without electronics?

Admit you’re wrong?

Confront someone who wronged you?

Start reaching out first?

Make a really big decision?

Break up with a toxic partner/friend?

Realize you were traumatized?

Talk about your trauma?

Clean your room regularly?

Make your bed regularly?

Lose weight healthily?

Gain weight healthily?

Start recovery?

Attempt to start recovery?

Continue recovering?

Become a parent?

Adopt a pet?

Care for a person?

Care for a pet?

Care for yourself?

Quit that job you hate?

Get into your dream school?

Pass that shitty class?

Make progress in therapy?

Get that haircut you’ve always wanted?

Start hormone therapy?

Start treatment?

Get surgery?

Care for a plant?

Save money?

Get engaged?

Get married?

Make a big purchase?

Move?

Grieve?

Stay alive?

Because in my book, that is a huge accomplishment!