#season 11 and beyond
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Some of my fav SydCarmy moments/looks in S3
#sydcarmy#the bear season 3#carmy berzatto#sydney adamu#the bear#carmy x sydney#syd x carmy#chef's kiss#the bear fx#carmen berzatto#my gifs#those last 2 gifs are silent communication on 11#they're saying so much with those looks even the usually thoughtful dialogue on the show could still never do it justice#their connection goes so far beyond words
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#SPNWEEK day 3 | fave gag reel moment | 11.15
#spnedit#J2edit#jarededit#jensenedit#spncreatorsdaily#jared paladecki#jensen ackles#J2#supernatural#lipglosskaz#gag reels#beyond the mat#season 11#J2*#myGR#myS11#the straight faces#bwahaha#i have a zillion faves#this is one#200
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I love being a nerd with too much free time because when people start saying any main RVB character is under 35 I can pull out the painstakingly assembled color coded canon timeline. I only do it for this though. My hill
#There are people who think Washington is 25. He's been in the military for over 15 years. BARE MINIMUM he would be 33.#And that's not even 33 during season 6 and beyond#that's 33 when he JOINED PFL.#Which by Chorus was about a decade ago. In season 11 he is NO YOUNGER than 40.#Carolina is also canonically younger than him#I know more than you.#talk
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Day in Fandom History: June 11…
When Finn finds and touches a porcelain lamb, it teleports him into a world where no one but himself and the Ice King can see him and ends up teaming with the Ice King to find a way to escape. “Beyond this Earthly Realm” premiered on this day, 12 Years Ago.
#Day in Fandom History#12 Years Ago#Adventure Time#Season 4#Episode 11#Beyond this Earthly Realm#Cartoon#Animation
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NOW I SEE WHY BONES ANIMATED SCENES WHICH ARE NOT EVEN IN THE MANGA...
This was maybe the first where anime was done BEFORE the manga came out..
But that doesn't matter AT ALL.BEACUSE THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT Kafka Asagiri wanted!!!!!!!!!
Don't you all see???? Before Every episode of the anime we already know what it will be shown. We are all just Insisting that let Bones NOT exclude this part, that part was not done properly, and so on. But we are Never savouring the anime in its own way.
This episode is EXACTLY What we needed!!!
To have our expectations, our fears, our emotions, all exposed at every turns in the anime; savouring the story in its true essence.
I was even afraid to watch what it will turn out to be. Stopped before Dazai could make an entrance (where Fyodor was thinking was about him). My heart was no longer agreeing with me. Was toooo tooooo afraid I might be disappointed.
But that doesn't matter, does it? Because we all saw the episode Without presuming anything.
That was what Kafka Asagiri wanted.
That is why he had sooo small chapters of the manga... So that Everything could lead to this... So that we can see the conclusion all together - WITHOUT any influence, penting up our expectations to the fullest!
And Sorry Bones for blaming you for the many diversions from the manga. You are truly.... Sugoi, Subarishii, all !!!
Saluté to Asagiri-san 🫡 You are beyond my imaginations- beyond everything!!
#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd manga#bungou stray dogs manga#bungou stray dogs anime#bungou stray dogs season 5 finale#bsd s5 ep11#bungou stray dogs episode 11#kafka asagiri#asagiri kafka#BONES#studio bones#you are incomparable Kafka Asagiri#how does kafka asagiri come up with these methods? 😱#beyond EVERYTHING bungou stray dogs#bsd episode 11#bsd ep11#bsd season 5#bsd anime
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Can't fucking believe it's been an entire year of tarlos being married what the fuck
#I've had the date marked in my calendar for like... forever#and I remember so vividly where I was a year ago...#Last year in April was when I got into the fandom and found out about the show#and so I got done with finals and was just bingeing the show like my life depended on it so I could catch up in time for the wedding#I remember getting what was probably the worst news I could have gotten at the time and just thinking 'oh. I hate this“ and then continuing#to binge season 3 and grappling for some sense of normality#while sobbing 👍🏽#and that was like...11 days before the wedding#Anyway! this stupid show and tarlos were there for me at the time and that's not something I can forget#and looking back its like. wow it's been a year. I'm in a better place and I STILL have them...#I can't ever forget what shit was like last May but beyond the pain I will also remember just focusing on getting to the wedding no matter w#what*#god I can't believe it's been an entire year I love them so much#911 lone star#evie's random shit
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Faith and Hedy
Faith has been chosen as star of the week at preschool. You know Mulder is just as excited as she is with this news. ❤️ Number 54 in the family series.
March 16, 2023 9:30 p.m.
“Scully,” Mulder said, as he walked into the office and sat down on the overstuffed gray chair. “We need to talk about something.”
“What is it?” she asked, turning from the laptop to face him. “Is everything okay?”
“I just got an email from the school,” he said and she frowned looking over her shoulder at the laptop.
“I didn’t see an email,” she said. “But I haven’t checked it in a few minutes. Is everything alright?” She looked back at him, her eyebrows raised in curiosity.
“Well…” He sighed and she drew in deep breath.
“Oh… it’s not something awful is it? Please don’t say it’s a virus. They already had the foot and mouth warning and I can’t take-”
“No. It’s not that.”
“Mulder…”
“Faith is going to be the star of the week,” he said with a grin. “They wanted us to know because it involves bringing home the class stuffed animal and taking pictures with it while she has it and then putting them into the class book, that will also come home with her, telling about what we did while it was with us.”
Scully stared at him and then turned back to her laptop with a shake of her head.
“What-”
“Mulder,” she said as she opened her email and clicked on the message from the school, reading it with a sigh. “You need to work on your delivery of good news as opposed to what could be a detrimental situation for all of us.”
“I thought you’d be happy. Faith has been wanting this for weeks now. She talks about it all the time.”
“I am happy,” she said, turning toward him again. “But you scared the shit out of me. I thought something awful was happening. Good news needs to be shared in a different way.” She raised her eyebrows and he smiled.
“Yeah. I suppose I probably could have had a better approach.”
“Probably?” she scoffed and he laughed, rising from the chair, coming closer to kiss her. But she pulled back, narrowing her eyes at him, then turned her head so he could kiss her cheek instead. “Oh, it’s like that is it?”
“It is for right now as I’m still imagining all the horrible things that could have been wrong.”
“Be more positive, Scully. See the light and not the darkness,” he teased and when she turned her head, a sarcastic comment most likely at the ready, he kissed her quickly on the lips and then jumped back before she could do anything.
“You dick,” she laughed, shaking her head. He winked and walked out of the room, laughing as a small couch pillow flew out behind him.
__________
“Daddy! Daddy!” Faith yelled as he walked into the classroom to pick her up the next afternoon. She ran to him, her smile huge. “Daddy! I get to be the star! I’m the star and I get to bring Hedy home with me.”
“Hedy?”
“Hedy the hedgehog! That’s her name, remember? I get to bring her home and have her for a whole week. That’s seven days, Daddy,” she said, as he picked her up and smiled, the shamrocks on her green headband bouncing.
“That’s right. So you’re the star of the week?”
“Yeah!” She threw her arms around his neck, squeezing him tightly as he closed his eyes and hugged her back.
“That’s fantastic news, my love. I know you’ve been wanting this for a long time.”
“Mr. Mulder?”
Mulder opened his eyes and smiled at Faith’s teacher Miss Cole. She smiled back as she held the hedgehog, a large book, and a manilla folder.
“As you heard, Faith has been selected as our star of the week.”
“Yes, I did. We’re very excited.”
“Very, very excited,” Faith said, smiling and nodding at Miss Cole.
“Good, I’m very glad,” she said with a small chuckle. “This is Hedy’s book where you may add pictures, stories, stickers, drawings- whatever you’d like to do. Within reason, of course.” She gave Mulder a look and he nodded with an understanding smile. “Please only use four pages maximum, so we will have space for all of our other friends.”
“We’ve been looking forward to this day for a long time. Those pages will be filled in no time,” Mulder assured her.
“Wonderful. I’m excited to see what you will do with Hedy,” Miss Cole said, handing the hedgehog to Faith, who grinned as she took it, squeezing it happily.
“Honey, can you go get your backpack and stuff from your cubby while I take this stuff from Miss Cole?” Mulder asked Faith and she nodded. He set her down and she ran off to get her things.
“I want you to know,” Miss Cole said. “Every time Hedy is returned to us, she is washed, dried, and then placed on the shelf where we can see her, but not touch her. I fully understand if you also want to wash her, but I just wanted you to be aware that we do wash her when she is returned.”
“Thank you,” Mulder said with a nod. “That’s good to know and I’m sure she will also be receiving a wash once we’re home.”
“Completely understandable,” Miss Cole said as she smiled, looking down at the stuff she still held. “Here is everything else that you’ll need and instructions on what Faith gets to do when she comes back to school next week. I know we sent you an email, but it’s good to have a physical copy as well.”
“Thank you,” Mulder said, taking everything from her as he saw Faith talking to Sadie and showing her the hedgehog in her arms. “She’s really been excited for her turn with Hedy.”
“She’s a sweet little girl,” Miss Cole said, looking at Faith with a smile. “Always so kind and curious. I’m glad she’s so excited.”
Mulder smiled proudly at the praise bestowed upon Faith, nodding his head in agreement.
“Daddy!” Faith said, running back to him as she called goodbye to Sadie. “Can we take Hedy to the park? I think she will like the swings.”
“Sure we can. You ready?”
“Yes! Bye, Miss Cole. We’re going to take Hedy to the park.”
“Have fun with her, Faith. I can’t wait to see the pictures you will add to the book.” Miss Cole gave her a side hug and booped Hedy on the nose. “See you soon, Hedy.”
“Bye, Miss Cole,” Faith said, waving Hedy’s small foot, smiling at Miss Cole.
“Bye, Faith. Goodbye, Mr. Mulder.” She nodded at them and walked back to the other children.
“Alright! You ready to go try out some swings at the park, Hedy?” Mulder asked, shifting the things in his hands to take Faith’s backpack from her.
“Yeah!” Faith shouted, dancing the hedgehog happily in the air.
______________
“These are so cute,” Scully said, as they sat on the couch later that evening. She was looking through Mulder’s camera roll after Faith had gone to bed with Hedy, who had been washed and dried when they arrived at home. “She had a good first day. Mulder… you climbed up that small enclosed ladder? That was very ambitious of you considering that you nearly got stuck last time.”
“That was only because I had the backpack on,” he said, smiling as she looked at him. “I didn’t have it this time and well… I made it.”
“Barely, I’m sure,” she chuckled, scrolling to the next picture.
“Yeah, but look how great that picture turned out. She’s so beautiful, Scully. And kind and curious, Miss Cole said earlier today.”
“Did she? Oh, I love this one. The way she’s looking at you. God, she is so beautiful.”
“Like you,” he said, watching Scully look at Faith, running her fingers over the screen.
“Mmm,” she hummed, selecting pictures and sending them to her phone.
“Scully, I added them all to our shared account. You don’t need to do that,” he said.
“You always say that and then I find pictures in your phone that I’ve never seen before. And then when I am scrolling through them, you tell me that next time you will be sure to remember, but you don’t.”
“Whatever,” he said with a smile, knowing full well that she was right.
“I’d rather cover my bases than miss out.” She handed his phone back to him as she picked up her own and looked at the pictures that had arrived. “There. Now I have them.”
“Mmm,” he hummed, echoing her earlier response, smiling as he changed his phone's wallpaper to a picture of Faith, Hedy’s head poking out from the top of her jacket, as he pushed her on a swing.
“What other plans were you thinking of doing while we have Hedy with us?”
“Well… I’m glad you asked,” Mulder said, opening his notes app on his phone and showing her what he had jotted down.
“Oh… you’ve already made a list. It’s serious,” she said, scooting down a little and snuggling into him as he began to read her his list of ideas.
______________
Saturday, they went to the library for story hour, as well as for the planned arts and crafts activity. When everyone was seated in the reading room, Miss Lauren, the librarian, welcomed them and asked how they all were doing, Faith raised her hand.
“Yes?” Miss Lauren asked with a smile.
Faith stood up from her spot on the floor and walked up beside her. She turned to the other children and held Hedy out in front of her.
“Mulder,” Scully whispered as she grabbed his arm, her eyes huge as she looked at him.
“This is Hedy. I got her from my school. She’s a hedgehog and she’s excited to hear the stories.”
“Oh my God,” Mulder breathed, taking out his phone and quickly snapping some pictures.
“Well, that’s fantastic,” Miss Lauren said. “I’m so glad Hedy is here with us today. I’m sure she will really enjoy the stories that have been selected.”
“She will. She likes to hear all kinds of stories.”
“Good,” Miss Lauren said with a smile. “Thank you for sharing her with us, Miss…?”
“Faith.”
“Faith. That’s such a beautiful name,” Miss Lauren said, touching Faith’s back. “Thank you for sharing Hedy with us. Now if you take your seat, we can start reading the stories.”
“Okay,” Faith said, grinning at her and then sitting back down, Hedy held in her lap.
Miss Lauren smiled and looked over at them, shaking her head when Scully mouthed I’m sorry to her. Reaching for the first book, Miss Lauren began to read and Mulder showed Scully the pictures he had taken.
“God, but she’s adorable,” she whispered and he laughed silently, putting his phone away and watching Faith as she listened to the story.
_______________
Sunday afternoon, they went to Skinner and Rachel’s to celebrate Rachel’s birthday, which was coming up on Wednesday. Faith excitedly showed Hedy to everyone, telling them about being star of the week and getting to take care of Hedy.
“Have you been having fun with her?” Rachel asked as she held Hedy and exclaimed over how special it was for Faith to have her.
“Yes. We went to the library yesterday and she had pancakes with me this morning. She liked the syrup best. She said that it’s sticky like honey. Hedgehogs like honey, Raycho.”
“Oh. I didn’t know that, thank you for telling me, Faith,” Rachel said, handing Hedy back and winking at Mulder and Scully.
The twins each got to hold Hedy, Faith telling them about her, showing them her eyes and little feet. When Jacob put one of the feet in his mouth, Faith gasped and took it from him gently.
“No, Jacob. She doesn’t like that. Don’t put her in your mouth,” Faith said, wiping off Hedy’s foot.
“Maybe we put her up where the twins can’t get to her?” Scully suggested, squatting down to be at Faith’s level, and Faith frowned as she contemplated it.
“No. I will hold her and they can touch her, but not put her in their mouths. I want to share her, but not all the time.”
Scully stared at Mulder as she stood up, shaking her head in disbelief. He laughed quietly as he turned his attention to Faith, who was indeed allowing the twins to touch Hedy, but not hold her.
“The things she says. The way she thinks… it amazes me,” Scully said softly.
“She’s truly becoming her own person,” he agreed, snapping pictures and shaking his head.
____________
Monday afternoon they walked over to Violet and Denis’s house to show Hedy the life-sized wooden giraffe, Jafadine, that stood in their yard.
Faith carried Hedy on her shoulders, singing a song she had learned at school, stopping every once in a while to show Hedy flowers or rocks that she found interesting, continuing with her song when she began walking again.
Scully slipped her hand into Mulder’s and squeezed gently, Bella’s leash held in her other hand.
“Remember when walks used to take so long? Her short steps and love for the same things that still give her pause, halting us as we walked?” Scully asked, letting out a deep sigh.
“I do,” he agreed, squeezing her hand and glancing at her with a small smile. “Those days and the days of necessary seclusion seem so far away and yet also like it was yesterday.”
“Yeah,” she whispered.
“But you know,” he said, letting go of her hand and putting his arm around her shoulders. “It’s like that video from ticky tock that Rachel showed you yesterday-”
“Do you mean TikTok?” she asked with a chuckle.
“Whatever it’s called,” he replied, pulling her closer. “That video she showed you, the one that made both of you cry, about how the baby you loved is replaced with a toddler you love just as much and then that toddler is replaced with a child and so on until all versions of the child leave all at once.” He stopped walking as the realization of the words hit him differently than they had when he had overheard them yesterday. “Oh… now I know why you were crying.”
“Yeah, thanks for the reminder. That was super great of you,” she said, wiping at her eyes.
“Ohhhhhh, Hedy, I love you. You’re the beeeeeest hedgehog in the whole entire universe,” Faith sang, spinning around with Hedy still on her shoulders.
They watched her dance around the dirt road in purple shoes, rainbow leggings under the sparkly green tutu she had worn on Saint Patrick’s Day, a pink fuzzy hoodie, her hair in two long ponytails, and they each sighed simultaneously.
“That day is far off, Mulder. So very far off. Let’s not taint today with those thoughts.”
“You said taint,” he whispered and she started to laugh, which broke through the sadness and brought them back. She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him, Bella whining beside them.
“Mommy. Daddy. Come on, Hedy wants to see Jafadine. She’s never seen a giraffe before,” Faith called to them.
“We’re coming, honey,” Mulder said, kissing Scully’s forehead as they stepped apart. “Don’t want to keep Miss Hedy waiting too much longer.”
Taking Scully’s hand again, they continued their walk, Faith holding Hedy high up when Jafadine came into view.
Pictures were taken with Jafadine and all the other wooden animals hidden throughout the yard, as well as with Violet and Denis themselves. They grinned happily as Hedy rested on Faith’s head while she stood between them, making a silly face.
They stayed for dinner, Faith needing to be carried home, tired from a long day of fun, Hedy safe and secure in the pocket of her hoodie.
______________
Tuesday they prepared the star of the week poster, writing down the answers that Faith gave them to the questions asked on the paper.
My name is: Faith Katherine Mulder I am: four years old My birthday is: on Halloween… ooooooo I have: blue eyes and dark brown hair My favorite color: pink and purple My favorite food: spaghetti and watermelon My favorite toy: the alien with the pink belly, the blue dragon, and the pretend kitchen My pets are: a cat named Grey, a dog named Bella, and lots of fish- but they don’t all have names. My family is: Mommy, Daddy, Unco, Raycho, Jacob and Elizabeth. I am happy: when I am with my family and my animals
“I think these answers give a wonderful description as to who you are, Faithy,” Mulder said, adding a family picture, all of them standing together in the snow at the Christmas tree farm, in the designated spot.
“What’s a describtion?” she asked, as she looked at the other pictures he had added: Faith dressed up in her alien costume on her second birthday, Bella and Grey sleeping together, Faith eating spaghetti, her face very messy, Faith helping the twins open their gifts on their first birthday, and Faith on her own, sitting on the porch swing staring out into the distance.
“Description,” he said, putting emphasis on the p and smiling at her. “It means telling someone about something. For instance, how would you describe Bella to me?”
Faith looked at Bella who was currently lying on the floor with Grey next to her, kneading softly into her side.
“Bella is a dog. She’s black and has… one, two, three, four legs and a long tail. She gives me kisses when she’s happy,” she said, looking at Mulder and smiling.
“That’s a great description,” he said with an answering smile.
“You have green eyes and brown hair, Daddy,” she said, leaning closer to him, searching his face as she touched his arm gently. “You’re tall and strong because you can carry me and Mommy. You’re nice and you love me.”
“Yes, Faithy,” he whispered, pulling her to him and closing his eyes as he held her close. “Yes, I do love you. Very much.”
“I love you too, Daddy.”
When she pulled back, he glanced over at Scully who had her phone pointed at them. She smiled, her eyes shining, and nodded as his phone beeped beside him.
As Faith got down and walked over to Bella and Grey, he opened the message. Letting out a deep sigh, he looked at the pictures of him and Faith staring at each other intently and then hugging.
“Thank you,” he whispered, glancing up at Scully. She nodded as she slipped her phone into her pocket and he looked down at the pictures again, adding them to his camera roll.
____________
Wednesday, after picking Faith up from school, he took her to get something to eat.
“How was your day, my love?” he asked, taking a french fry from the basket, dipping it in ketchup, and taking a bite.
“It was good,” Faith said, adjusting Hedy on the table, making sure the straw to her small glass reached her mouth.
“That’s good,” Mulder said, smiling as he watched her. “The kids liked learning about you?”
“Yup. I got to be the line leader and to pick the after snack activity.”
“Wow, sounds like you had a great day. What activity did you pick?”
“Painting. I painted a sun and it’s wearing sunglasses,” she said with a giggle, looking at him and then taking a french fry for herself.
“Well, that makes sense since the sun is hot and very bright.”
“Yeah,” Faith said, looking at Hedy. “How many more days do I get to have her?”
“Two. You have to bring her back next time you go to school on Friday.”
“That’s not so many days,” she said with a sigh.
“No,” he said, trying not to smile. “But by the time you take her back, you will have had her for seven days, remember?”
“Yeah.”
“And we did a lot with her. We’ll have to start writing it all down and putting the pictures in the book tonight.”
“Will you take a picture of us now?” she asked, picking Hedy up and holding her as she pretended to feed her a french fry.
“Of course,” he answered, taking out his phone and snapping some pictures. She smiled when she saw them, showing them to Hedy as well.
When they left, Faith made sure to ask if Hedy could also have one of the balloons the restaurant offered, asking Mulder to tie it to her small paw. He obliged and on the outside bench, letting Faith borrow his sunglasses, he took pictures of them with their matching balloons, Faith laughing as she held the sunglasses to her face.
______________
“It’s our last night with Hedy. What would you like to do with her?” Scully asked, when they had come back from the afternoon spent with Rachel and the twins at an indoor play space.
Jacob and Elizabeth had stayed mostly in the area for smaller children, but Faith ran around all over, playing with everything that drew her eye. All the while, Hedy had gone with her in the little backpack Faith wore, her little head poking out through the zipper.
“I don’t know,” Faith said with a sigh. “I don’t want her to go. I like having her with me.”
“I know, honey,” Scully said, pulling her close and kissing the top of her head. “But it’s time for someone else to have fun with her, just like it was time for you to have fun with her.”
“I know,” Faith said, burrowing into Scully’s arms, who looked up at Mulder with a smile.
“Oh… I got it,” he said, snapping his fingers. “I just thought of something that I don’t think Hedy has done with us yet, maybe even ever.”
“What?” Faith asked, her voice muffled.
“She hasn’t watched the stars come out while we lay on a blanket in the yard. Remember when we did that last summer?” he asked.
“It was warmer then,” Scully said, giving him a pointed look as she rubbed Faith’s back.
“It will be a little cold,” he agreed with a shrug. “But, we’ll dress warmly and bring some extra blankets with us to wait for the stars. We might even see a shooting star.”
“Do you think we will?” Faith said, sitting up to look at him, sniffling quietly.
“You never know with stars,” he said, raising his eyebrows as he smiled at her. “What do you say? You in?”
“Yeah,” she answered, grinning and nodding her head.
“Then let’s get busy gathering all the things we will need.”
Fifteen minutes later, he was putting down a large tarp that had been in the shed, heavy rocks holding it in place. Three thick yoga mats were rolled out, large sleeping bags were zipped together, and pillows and extra blankets were added to their makeshift bed.
Popcorn and bottles of water were brought out and once everyone was ready, the lights inside and out were turned off and they lay together in the sleeping bags, blankets on top of them, waiting to watch the stars come out.
Faith, lying between them, leaned her head against Mulder’s arm and set Hedy on his chest, lying on her back so she could look up at the sky. He smiled at Scully over Faith’s head and she smiled back.
“You know what to do if you see a shooting star, right Hedy?” Mulder asked and Faith shook Hedy’s body in a no motion. “Well, if you see one flying past, you close your eyes and you quickly make a wish.”
“Can it be for anything you want?” Faith asked and Mulder nodded.
“It sure can.”
“If I see one, I’ll wish Hedy could always stay with us,” she said softly and Scully hummed. “I know I have to take her back tomorrow, but I can still wish.”
“Sure you can, baby,” Scully said, turning to look at her, smiling at Mulder.
“Okay.”
They lay there for a while, Bella running around and coming over for occasional kisses and pets, watching the sky darken and the stars twinkling. Scully pointed out the constellations to Faith, telling her about the Greek mythology attached to them.
“I like the Pegasus one,” Faith said with a yawn, snuggling close to Scully. “But Hedy likes Cassiopeia.”
She yawned again, holding Hedy tightly in her arms, and Mulder smiled at her. Scully cuddled her, humming softly, as Faith yawned again.
He looked back up at the sky, at the constellations Scully had pointed out. He found Hercules, his own favorite, and kept staring when suddenly a star shot across the sky.
“Faithy! Did you-” he asked, turning his head to look at her, but he saw that she had fallen asleep and by the looks of it, Scully was not far off. “No, you didn’t see.”
He smiled and made a wish for all of them, for continued good health and happiness.
Taking out his phone, he moved carefully, getting one last picture of the time they spent with Hedy.
_____________
He carried the big book as they walked to the classroom, Faith’s pages full of pictures and stories of what they had done with Hedy. Faith had added stickers and written her name and Hedy’s under one of the pictures, smiling at it proudly.
“You ready?” he asked, taking Faith’s hand and giving it a squeeze. She sighed as she shrugged her shoulders. “Yeah, I know, honey. Hey, hang on a second.” He stopped walking and squatted down in front of her. “Mommy and I were talking last night about how much you’re going to miss Hedy.”
“I will miss her,” Faith said, looking at Hedy with sad eyes.
“I know. So Mommy and I came up with an idea, but I’ll leave the decision to you.”
“What is it?”
“Well, we were thinking that maybe we could find a hedgehog stuffie that looks like Hedy. It might not be the exact same, but it would be a hedgehog. Would you like to have one?”
“It won’t be just like her?”
“I don’t know, honey. We could look and see what we could find.”
“Like the fairy doll?” she asked. “The one I lost and we couldn’t find her again?”
“But we found one like it? Yeah. What do you think?”
“I don’t know,” she said, looking at Hedy. “I like this one, but my turn is over now.”
“It is,” he said, watching her face as she stared at Hedy.
“I don’t know, Daddy.” She raised her blue eyes to him and he smiled, kissing her forehead.
“You don’t have to give me an answer right now. How about you think about it while you’re at school today and let me know when I pick you up. Does that sound like a good plan?”
“Okay,” she said, smiling as she squeezed Hedy.
“Great,” he said, hugging her tightly for a second. Letting her go, he stood up and reached for her hand again.
They walked into the classroom and she hurried to put her stuff in her cubby as he walked over to Miss Cole to hand her the book.
“Thank you,” she said, taking it and smiling in Faith’s direction. “We’ll all look at it together during circle time and discuss the things Faith did with Hedy.”
“She really had fun with her. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” She smiled as the children began to surround her and Mulder took that at his cue to leave.
Finding Faith in the play area with Hedy, he tapped her shoulder and then squatted down when she turned to look at him.
“I’m gonna get going now, love. You have fun. Bye, Hedy. It was nice having you with us this past week.” He shook Hedy’s small foot and gave Faith a kiss. “Bye, hon.”
“Bye, Daddy. I’ll think about my decision to tell you later,” she said, her tone very serious. He fought back a smile as he nodded.
“Okay. Take your time, Faithy. Bye, love.”
“Bye bye,” she said, turning back to the play area and pouring Hedy a cup of tea.
He walked out of the classroom and back to the car, his thoughts on what Faith’s decision would be.
Sitting in the car, he looked through the Hedy photo album and smiled. It had been fun to have her and see how Faith played with and shared her with others.
Nodding, he opened an app and began to search for a stuffed hedgehog that was similar to Hedy.
In case Faith decided she wanted one, he would be ready with options for her to pick from, the thought of the happiness in her blue eyes all the motivation he needed.
#post season 11#xf fanfic#the x files#msr#love#happy#family life: the story beyond the series#domestic life#domestic fluff#fluff fluff fluff#preschool#friends and family#celebrating their life in real time#sweetness#star of the week
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arizona and alex anon here
thank you!
take all the time you need!
I made the set, i hope it's fine.😁
#ask#anonymous#honestly i don't usually gif scenes beyond season 11 unless they're japril related#i did this once but i'm not sure i will again so if anyone has any requests in the future
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Season 11, Episode 15: Beyond The Mat
This is so fake
People enjoy this?
This makes no sense to me
Finally, something I understand
Nice
That sounds like John
Not like they can do much about it
Sam.
Touch grass
Yeah, this tracks
Yikes
Sure
That's disgusting
Egh. That's nasty
Dean's fangirling so hard
I think he deserves it
I don't think I can watch
Yikes
That's hilarious and so on-brand
Wow
He didn't exactly have a bed
Yeah, I can imagine
That's definitely not what happened
Yeah, sure
I like the outfit
Wow.
It's not about money anymore
Dean, you do that everyday
Yeah, they would know
Fair
Well that sucks
Well, at least Dean is having fun
Dean. You're not a child
Yikes
Not the steel chair 😭
Definitely super staged
Wait, I know this song!
Modern Day Cowboy by Tesla. It's in my Dean playlist apparently, which is hilarious
He is too drunk to be looking after a kid
Oh, poor kid, he doesn't deserve to lose his dad like that
That's one way to put it
Have fun
Dean.
Smooth
Okay, Kool-Aid Man
Nice.
Uh huh
What does that mean?
Yeah, okay
Wow. That was a good one
She's nice for a demon
Ah. Okay
I would not want to be standing on a felt table in stilettos
Back on track
Yeah, I can't imagine those places are very safe
I wonder what monster that was?
Yikes
Yeah...
The Winchesters would know
Witches, maybe?
Oh. Could be anything
Harley dude
This can't end well
He needs a chill pill
Good idea
Dean.
Nice
He's barely alive
Not even remotely
...did he just fart?
Good for her
Awesome
Definitely Harley
Give him a minute, he's back in Hell
Well.
Crowley's back
They took him
Gunnar?
He passed the holy water check
Spooky
It was the cheapest shot
Gunnar is working for someone
The dealer
Ah. Crossroads demon. That explains a lot
Yeah
It's a pretty big favor, actually
You've already attracted too much attention
Good for him
And he doesn't want to be there
I respect that
Yikes
Oh, I don't want to think about that
Interesting
ARE THOSE THE SUPERNATURAL BOOKS?
Whoa.
No
Uh oh
Why did they do that.
Well crap
Ouch
Sure
I'm sure he did
Yeah, he really should have guessed
He's not even wrong
Taller?
What does that mean???
Never meet your heroes
Not Good
Blease. Stop calling him puppy 😭
Poof
Got the finesse
Nice
Time to go
Oh boy
I don't believe that
That's his specialty
Yikes
Yeah. He does.
One-time use, man
Nice
Rip Crowley
Because that makes sense
Why?
There it is
Hellhounds
Dean knows
Poor guy
They don't want to be in the way
Nope
A million times
Yeah.
Darn right
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what you know - ch4: served || r. sukuna
❦ ryomen sukuna x f!reader [college au] [ongoing series]
❝ you've heard his reputation and you've seen first-hand the way he's late to class if he even bothers to show up. paired with him for the most important project of the year, you choose to give him the benefit of the doubt- but maybe that's more than he deserves when your perfect grades depend on him, or maybe there's more to the aloof and irritable sukuna than meets the eye. ❞
❦ cw ; mdni, 18+ only. contains explicit sexual themes and content. use of alcohol. use of cannabis. use of nicotine/cigarettes. angst. hurt/no comfort. hurt/comfort. implied injury. family trauma. smut. slow burn. anxiety. tags will be updated as series continues.
❦ additional tags ; college parties and themes. sukuna ooc warning as this is a realistic take on modern sukuna. reader is fairly preppy and implied to be smaller than sukuna, but he's 6"11.
❦ words ; 12k.
main masterlist || series masterlist || previous chapter || next chapter
When Sukuna was in the sixth grade, he read A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket for a project. He doesn’t remember the plot, the characters, nor any details of real importance about the series, but he knows one thing for sure.
The title could describe how his day unfolded.
Nothing is particularly out of place throughout his morning. He wakes up to the sound of his alarm, blearily rubbing his eyes as he gets out of bed for an early morning workout. He throws his airpods in and turns on his workout playlist as he lifts weights and hops on his treadmill before taking a cold shower to rouse himself from the clutches of drowsiness.
He wakes up the kids, helping Yuji get ready while he multitasks making oatmeal for breakfast and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for their lunches, which he tosses into their Pokemon lunch bags alongside some snacks. Mornings like these are like clockwork for him, simple and predictable, just how he prefers. No surprises.
With the first snow of the season chilling the air, he bundles both kids up in winter gear and grabs his heavy coat before walking them to school. He sets his alarm for their pickup, allowing him just enough time to get to his final class of the day, albeit a little bit late. Nothing new about that, though. As long as he isn’t late for your presentation, that’s all that matters. It’s the one thing he’s keeping at the front of his mind so as not to disappoint you.
He’s not sure why it matters so much, but like an itch he can’t scratch, the thought won’t go away. Ever-present and the only thing at the forefront of his mind since he accepted the presentation on your behalf. He’s not foolish enough to think that there’s any world in which you want to present at all, even though he knows you wouldn’t say no to the extra credit, and he could use it too.
He blinks snow away from his lashes, letting it melt from the warmth of his cheeks as his gaze sticks to the ground before him. His fingers fumble with the metal lighter in his pocket as he walks. He’s had it for a long time, evidence of how worn it is carved into the steel, but he’d sooner pull it apart and put it back together himself than get rid of it if it failed.
As he reaches the campus with time to spare, he spots one of your friends outside the building to his next class. He recognizes the blonde immediately, the one you sit next to at lunch, though he doesn’t recall his name. He knows they share an Accounting class, though him and Sukuna have never interacted beyond brief glances.
Keeping his distance from the blonde, Sukuna pulls out a cigarette as his thoughts are once again back on you, and all he can do is pray the nicotine dulls the feeling of his heart palpitating just at the thought of you like some pathetic teenager. The smoke billows and wisps in the air, more evident than usual in the cold, and he relishes in its brief reprieve from his thoughts.
It’s lust.
It’s nothing more than a reminder that he needs to find an excuse for his neighbour to watch his brothers so he can attend one of Gojo’s shitty frat parties and get laid.
With a glance at his watch, he stubs out his cigarette and trudges past the blonde without a glance. He makes his way to his usual seat isolated from the rest of the students in the corner closest to the door in case he needs to leave. Flipping his laptop open, he waits for the old computer to boot up so he can put together a semblance of an outline to work off of for the presentation at the end of the day.
It’s then that his misfortune begins.
His eyes flicker down to a notification in his email inbox and he sighs at the sight of the contact, his boss at the warehouse looking for him to fill a shift. Right now. He could accept the shift, miss European History, get off in time to pick up his brothers, bring them home, shower, and make it to Art History albeit a few minutes later than he’d intended. That wouldn’t be a big deal, you wouldn’t present at the beginning of class. It would also give him enough money to begin looking at Christmas gifts for the brats, which is an appealing idea…
He accepts the shift, and slips out towards the end of class. The shift isn’t unlike any other, nothing that would make anyone think this day is worse than any other. Sure, he stepped in a deep pile of snow on his way back from his shift and his ankle damn near froze and his socks are wet, but he’ll live. Not the end of the world.
He clocks out and picks up his brothers without a hitch, getting back with enough time to quickly shower the remnants of his shift from his skin and toss on a black hoodie with a Deftones logo across the front, and a pair of black jeans that were strewn over the back of his desk chair. His neighbor would be over any minute and he could head to class, only a few minutes late. An exhausting start to his day, but not bad.
A knock at the door sounds, and Sukuna’s brow furrows. Since when does his neighbor knock? He gave her a key for a reason.
“Choso! Grab that!” He calls as he throws his laptop and textbooks into his backpack, sure the sitter just forgot her keys despite being literally across the hall.
With a sigh, Sukuna casts a glance back at his room to see if he’s forgotten anything, when Choso peeks his head through a crack in the door. “Kuna? Someone’s asking for you.”
The tattooed man’s brow furrows further as he throws his backpack over one shoulder and follows after his little brother, who had shut the door on the person upon realizing it wasn’t their neighbor. The little boy stands a small ways back as Sukuna opens the door.
A man dressed in a long, deep gray peacoat with neatly styled hair stands at the door. Something akin to shock flickers in the man’s gaze at the sight of Sukuna, but it hardens as he addresses him.
“I’m looking for Ryomen Sukuna.”
Sukuna’s eyes narrow, his posture straightening. “What do you want?”
“Can you confirm you’re Ryomen Sukuna?” The man doubles down, keeping his expression indifferent.
With a scowl, Sukuna nods. “Yeah, I’m Sukuna. What do you want?” There’s more bite this time as Sukuna repeats his question.
“Excellent. I am here to serve you with legal documents. Please ensure that you attend your court hearing on March 23rd. By accepting these documents, you have been officially notified. Should you decline them, I am still obligated to make a note of this interaction.”
“The fuck?” Sukuna snatches the manilla envelope from the man’s hands, ripping it open and pulling the documents out. His eyes scan the words on the document, widening in disbelief. “You’re fucking kidding me.”
–
If Sukuna were a better man, he would have put your presentation in his calendar. He would have made an alarm. He would have sent you an email. Anything to let you know he was occupied. If he was a better man, he wouldn’t have torn his court documents in two. The ripped paper is hardly any concern when the handle on his door fell to the ground with a clank with the force he used to shut the door. At least one of those could be fixed with tape.
If Sukuna was a better man, he would have noticed his mistake before it got dark out.
With his head in his hands, he stares out the window by the table at the back of his apartment, brimming with anger when it all comes back to him.
The fucking presentation.
He wants to tell himself that he shouldn’t care, that you’re just a nuisance that wormed your way into his life and his mind. He wants to tell himself that you don’t matter and that he should forget about you like he had tried to last week, and accept that like everyone else in his life, he let you down.
But when he envisions your genuinely nervous expression at the thought of presenting even with him, his blood runs cold at the thought of you presenting without him.
He balls his hand into a fist, trembling from the sheer force of strength he puts into flexing his muscles.
“Fuck!” He hisses, slamming his palm down onto the table as he pushes himself up, sending ripped paper tumbling to the floor. His chair scrapes loudly across the scuffed hardwood of the dining space as he rushes to the door, pausing for only a moment at the sight of the handle he’d barely managed to screw loosely back into place. His jaw tightens as he grabs his keys and coat, tugging the door open a bit too hard as he hears the handle fall to the ground with a metallic thud inside the apartment.
As if he wasn’t already frustrated enough, this only serves to piss him off further. He considers himself lucky (if it can even be called that at this point) that his neighbor is still willing to watch his brothers (with a warning about the door handle) after the irritated dismissal he’d thrown her way earlier, but he’ll fix that bridge later.
There’s a more important one on his mind right now.
He’s not sure why he runs to campus first. Of course you won’t be there. Of course the professor won’t be in class, with the lecture hall closed and locked.
He tries the door again, as though a second tug at the handle might turn back time to three hours ago when he should have been here, but it’s nothing but wishful thinking. With his hand still on the unmoving handle, he slams his head against the door.
“Fuck!” With his brothers no longer around to hear, the curse escapes him in a furious roar. Whatever anger had been simmering at the surface for hours now bubbles over and explodes. In a flurry of frustration and pent up emotions, he reaches into his pocket and tosses the first thing that hits his fingers.
His lighter collides with the wall with a dull thud, falling in two pieces to the ground across the hall as a small dent is left in its wake in the drywall.
Sukuna’s hands rake through his hair, his teeth gritted as he inhales sharply, grappling with the weight of his emotions. He stumbles back until his back collides with the wall behind him, sliding down it with his head in his hands. He’s not sure how long he sits there before the sound of the cold wind whipping at the door outside brings him back to the present.
Running a hand over his face again, he grits his teeth as he stares across the hall at the lighter on the floor and frowns. Pushing himself to his feet, he crouches in front of it as he gathers the lid, hinge, and body, smoothing his thumb over the engraved name of his father on the steel.
Looks like he’ll be learning to fix a lighter sooner than he thought. Shoving it back into his pocket, he pulls his hood up over his head and makes his way back out into the cold. It’s well into the evening now, the cold snowflakes a sharp contrast to his warm skin as the night temperature falls well below that of the early morning.
His gaze rakes the empty Friday night campus. Distant laughter outside one of the bars on campus is all that disrupts the drone of wind and distant cars. You’re gonna be pissed. You have every right to be pissed, and he knows it, but for some god forsaken reason that Sukuna can’t make sense of, he can’t leave this be. He doesn’t want the image of your fearful expression as you present alone to be the only thing that comes to mind when he thinks of you.
Would it be stupid of him to show up at your door? He doesn’t even know. He doesn’t know what the protocol is for shit like this because this doesn’t happen to people like him. Sukuna’s only long-lasting friendship is with Uraume, who knows him well enough to know not to hold his fuck-ups against him. It’s a miracle they’re still friends, if he’s honest with himself. Of course, he has other people he hangs around with here and there, but no one close enough to bother himself with matters like this.
Fiddling with the broken lighter in his pocket, he sets off towards your place, bussing to the nearest stop as he makes his way there from memory. He buzzes your apartment, staring at the ground as the machine rings several times, before it eventually hangs up.
No.
He hits the button for your apartment once more, but you still don’t answer. You’re not home.
“Fuck,” he mutters, the remnants of his anger fizzling out into concern and something that twists in his gut- dread. The day has worn him down so much he has half a mind to wait for you to come home and try to talk to you, but with his mind and body as drained as he is, he doesn’t think he’ll make it home if he doesn’t leave now. That’s not even taking the cold into consideration.
Trudging back to the bus stop, he slides down against the bench and stares up at the sky. The stars are barely visible, but a few still shine brightly enough to be seen over the glow of the city lights. Like everyone else, he took Astronomy as an elective just for the credits, and he remembers that the stars that don’t flicker are planets. He wonders if the one he’s staring at is Jupiter, or maybe Venus.
He wonders if you like looking at the stars.
Sukuna leans forward with his head in his hands. He’s fucked, he’s so fucked. How many ‘unfortunate events’ do those kids go through in that stupid book? How many more can he take?
He swallows hard, reaching into his pocket for a cigarette and balancing it between his lips, reaching in again for his lighter. Although the cap isn’t attached, he hopes it still turns. To his relief, it produces a flame and he sets the broken cap over it to put it out, replacing the pieces into his pocket as he waits for the bus. The nicotine does very little to help dull the edge of his stress.
The ride home is quiet, save for the rumbling of the bus’ engine and the tapping of someone’s foot at the front of the vehicle. It’s not long before Sukuna’s back in his apartment with a screwdriver in-hand as he holds the doorknob back in place while screwing it back in. Its hold on the wooden frame is loose at best given just how badly he’d jostled it earlier and Sukuna has to turn to super glue to keep it in place.
Putting the kids to bed is a mechanical and empty action, one that he tries with every fiber of his being to hide from them. They’re smart kids, he knows they’ve already figured out something is up, but Sukuna needs to keep up appearances and make it seem as though nothing is wrong.
With the kids in bed, he sits at his desk with his laptop, his fingers hovering over your email thread. ‘sorry’, he types out, before hitting backspace. ‘howd the presentation go?’, he then types out, but that’s just about the worst thing he thinks he could send. ‘can we talk?’ he tries next, staring at the screen. He rubs his eyes with his thumb and forefinger before typing and hitting send before he can overthink his words.
[email protected] - Friday, 10:02 PM hey. let me know if you get this. i owe you.
Shutting his laptop, he leans over his desk, his chin propped up on his forearms.
His mind is plagued with thoughts that make it feel as though a dagger is being plunged straight into his chest, each one twisting and dragging it through his body. He wants to fight back, he wants to fight back so violently that he draws blood, but there’s no one on the receiving end of his anger but the world itself.
He grits his teeth, exerting enough strength that he knows his jaw will be sore tomorrow. Every muscle in his body already aches, why not add another one? With a sigh, he finds it in him to sit back up, staring helplessly at the ceiling.
When Sukuna was in second grade, he read Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst. He doesn’t remember what that one was about either, but that one could be the title for his day as well.
–
You blink up at the ceiling the Saturday following your shitty presentation, emotionally drained. Though Nanami had proposed to take you for breakfast… or lunch or dinner, he had allowed you to decline this time, unlike on Friday. You’re no less thankful for him being there for you, but all you really want to do is take some time for yourself.
Pushing yourself out of bed to make tea, you stare out at the snowscape outside your window, glad you’re staying inside as you’re able to bundle yourself up in blankets. You pick up your laptop, setting it on your lap in front of you as you browse movies, looking for something that appeals to you.
Your email inbox number rises as you peruse streaming services, though you don’t bother to look at it. You’re not awaiting any emails. That is, until it’s rising steadily as you’re watching it.
You know who’s blowing up your inbox. It’s not the latest deals from the ramen store down the street, or Netflix requesting to change your password.
It’s the one person you don’t want to talk to.
Your mouse hovers over the ‘x’, your finger not even an inch away from clicking. Yet some sort of bitter curiosity gets the better of you as you click on your inbox.
Seven emails, huh?
You sigh as you stare at the emails. He’s replying to the thread of your last exchanges, so you can’t see a preview of what he’s written.
“Is it so wrong of me to be disappointed?” You remember asking Nanami last night, stirring the straw in your milkshake mindlessly.
He sits up in his seat. “He made you a promise, no? You have every right to be upset.”
You glance up at him. His sharp mahogany eyes are unreadable, but you can sense his sympathy for you through his actions.
You’re silent, absorbing his words as you return to mindlessly stirring your milkshake. The chatter around you is dull in comparison to the loud thoughts of inadequacy digging their filthy claws into your mind.
“I made a fool of myself.”
“No one will remember by Monday,” Nanami tries to reassure you, but it falls on deaf ears.
“I think I said that to myself after Prom.”
Nanami’s lips press together in a tight-lipped frown. “We were kids, back then. All of us, all of them. Things will be different this time around.”
“Do you believe that, or are you just saying that to reassure me?” You ask with a dry laugh, a nervous reaction to his sympathy.
Kento frowns, leaning forward. “I believe it with my entire being,” he replies firmly, ending his statement with your name. You glance up at him again, observing the way his jaw tenses when he sees your puffy cheeks and reddened eyes. “Don’t let this keep you from being you.”
You stare back down at the strawberry milkshake. It’s melting so steadily it’s hardly a shake anymore, it’s closer to strawberry milk.
“You know what the worst part of this whole thing is?”
“What’s that?”
“Well-” you laugh bitterly, “- I can't decide what's worse; That I’m actually still worried about him for some reason or that I ever believed him to begin with.”
Nanami’s gaze flickers away from you as he leans forwards over the table. He contemplates his words carefully, mindful of your obvious feelings for the burly man. “You don't deserve to contemplate that over someone.”
“What am I supposed to contemplate, then?” You chuckle wryly, finally taking a sip of your milkshake. It’s definitely just strawberry milk now. At least it’s not lukewarm yet.
“Did you see the latest episode of ‘Love is Blind’?”
You set your milkshake down with a clink. “Did you?”
“Well… No, but I heard Shoko and Haibara speaking about it at lunch.”
You crack a smile. It’s half-hearted and doesn't reach your eyes, but he senses your amusement anyways and returns your smile.
Now, staring at your unopened emails from Sukuna, Nanami’s words continue to echo in your mind.
“You don't deserve to contemplate that over someone.”
So why are you struggling to return to Netflix? You should just watch a movie and forget about him. If his words meant anything, he would have shown up when you needed him. He wouldn’t have made promises he couldn’t keep.
Sighing, you will yourself to click away and keep your mind off of him as you peruse movies on Netflix. Mindlessly scrolling through each category, it’s by the third one that it occurs to you that you haven’t actually been paying attention to your options, your thoughts occupied by the one man you’re trying to avoid.
After showing you his words mean nothing, why are you still so stuck to him like glue? Staring into your mug of tea, you frown when the answers to your problems aren’t swirling within the warm drink.
Against your better judgment, you take a sip of your tea and click on his emails.
[email protected] - Friday, 10:02 PM hey. let me know if you get this. i owe you.
Frustration stirs within you. He knew damn well that you would be upset with him for not showing up and the best he can do is an ‘I owe you’?
[email protected] - Saturday, 7:23 AM cmon just let me know youre seeing this
[email protected] - Saturday, 7:28 AM fuck, i know i
[email protected] - Saturday, 7:29 AM shit. hit send too early. i know i fucked up but give me a chance to explain
[email protected] - Saturday, 7:33 AM please.
The sight of his plea staring back at you feels like a mockery. Burying your face in your hands, you groan loudly to yourself, as though it might help you make sense of your emotions. Sukuna doesn’t plead with people, he’s made that much clear. Everything with him happens on his terms and is purely transactional, so what’s changed to have him suddenly begging for your attention without asking for anything in return?
Some delusional part of you wants to believe that whatever he wants from you is more than just free babysitting services but he’s given you no reason to believe otherwise.
[email protected] - Saturday, 8:41 AM ill make it up to you. idk how but fuck
You know he’s serious when his email ends with your name. Not Prom Queen, not some nickname that borderlines on flirty, but your given name.
Your mouse hovers over the reply button, thoughts racing through your mind. What if there was an emergency? What if he needs help? What if the boys are in trouble?
No, if something was wrong he wouldn’t be rambling over email. Nothing is wrong, Sukuna is just an asshole, and maybe you need to remind yourself of that. Maybe you’re too kind, maybe you give others the benefit of the doubt too often when they don’t deserve it. Maybe the rumors about Sukuna were always true. Maybe Gojo is right about him.
With frustration fueling your movements, you close the emails and shut the tab. He doesn’t deserve your time and you’ll be damned if you let him ruin your weekend with his incessant messages.
Returning to Netflix, you finally settle on a romantic comedy you’ve been meaning to watch and get back to your (somewhat cold) tea.
–
After a relaxing Saturday spent by yourself and a rejuvenating Sunday spent alongside Shoko, who convinced you (again) to forget about Sukuna, you feel miles better than you did on Friday.
Shoko was ready to put up a fight with your former project partner when you told her what had happened. Now that classes had ended for the semester and you only found yourself on campus to make use of the library, the extra free time only fueled her fire. Nanami, usually cool and composed, was no better when the two of you joined him in the library.
“How are you feeling?” He asked, shooting a glance at Shoko who he’s certain had heard about what went down.
“I’m okay. Thanks, Nanamin,” you shoot him a smile. Though you do seem more at ease than Friday, it’s clear that your anxiety and frustration runs deeper than simply being disappointed. You’re heartbroken. Shoko and Kento would have to be fools not to see the heart eyes you’d had for the History major.
“If you need anything from me, please feel free to ask,” he offers.
“Anything at all,” Shoko tacks on to his statement.
A smile pulls at your lips, even as you find yourself sighing. “Can both of you stop trying to fight him? I’m okay now, really.”
“I wasn’t suggesting that I would fight him-” Nanami begins, interrupted by Shoko.
“I was.”
You can’t help a laugh at her confidence and the grimace that Nanami dons at the sound of said confidence. Regardless, you’re thankful for their support, even if Shoko’s just a bit too eager to teach Sukuna a lesson.
You all fall into easy silence as you study individual subjects, simply enjoying being in the presence of your friends. The morning is quiet and still in the library outside of the sounds of pencils and pens scratching over paper and textbook pages turning. Only a few other students made their way to campus on the first official day of break aside from you, Kento, and Shoko.
Your focus wanes quickly as you find your thoughts wandering, something that’s been commonplace when you find yourself stuck in your own head. Your thoughts roam back to Sukuna’s emails, to his mention of wanting to explain what happened. Had something happened?
You shake your head, trying to remind yourself he’s not worth your time of day and you have no reason to trust his words.
The morning drags on as you struggle to focus on your studies and the moment the clock strikes noon, you’re immediately packing up and dragging your friends to the lunch hall, desperate for the reprieve from your hopeless thoughts.
“I think I’m fucked for my Bio exam,” Shoko sighs as you take a seat at your usual table in the empty hall.
“Perhaps if you had spent more time in your lectures and less time smoking outside my Accounting class, you wouldn’t feel that way,” Kento bites back, earning a laugh from you. He may be aloof and calm, but sometimes you forget just how sassy the blonde can be when he wants to be.
“Shit, that was your Accounting class?”
“Mhm.”
“Motherfucker,” Shoko mutters under her breath, looking off to the side when something catches her eye and she sits up straight suddenly. Both you and Kento take notice of her weird behaviour and go to follow her line of sight, turning your gaze over your shoulder until you’re eye to eye with none other than the cause of all your problems.
Sukuna’s chest rises and falls unevenly, as though he ran to the lunch hall in an effort to find you, his usual aloof expression long gone and replaced with something you’ve never seen on him before- regret. He’s in a black winter coat, his hands fiddling with something in his pocket as he stands there as though he’s debating what he wants to do.
Your heart clenches, your chest feeling heavy all of a sudden. All you can do is freeze, staring uncertainly at him as your body flips between a morbid curiosity to know what happened and the sparks of anger that you feel for him putting you through something you made clear you didn’t want to do.
Finally making up his mind, he crosses the lunch hall to you, only to be met with Nanami taking a stand in front of you. Kento is a tall man, though you would never know when he stands between you and Sukuna. Even with the horribly obvious disadvantage between them, there’s something heartwarming about Kento putting himself between you.
Sukuna’s gaze hardens, his jaw tightening at the sight of Kento. He opens his mouth to say something, but Shoko speaks up first.
“Leave, Sukuna.”
Your lips purse as you glance between Shoko and Kento. It’s sweet, really, of them to try to spare your feelings and fend for you, but you can do it yourself.
“Ken, Sho. I can handle this.” Your smile does little to convince either of them, but with a frown, Nanami sits down. With a resounding sigh, you’re able to finally get a good look at Sukuna.
You’re used to him looking tired, you’re more than used to him looking downright exhausted, but the expression he wears now isn’t exhaustion. His muscles are tense, eyes flickering between your friends before they land on you and it’s only then that his distress becomes apparent. He’s doing what he can to hide it, but his facade of indifference is already cracked, falling apart at the seams.
Your heart twists at the sight as you wrestle with your anger and concern, deciding finally to put yourself first for once. Something Sukuna is clearly incapable of.
“I don’t want to see you, Sukuna.” Your voice is firm and even, and you’re grateful you’re able to keep up the hardened shell you’ve built up over the weekend. He doesn’t deserve your tears or your anxiety.
“I know. You can tell me to fuck off and I’ll listen, but first you gotta give me a chance to explain,” his voice is raspy, evidence of some sort of strain, and you wonder whether he’s been crying or yelling, or maybe he’s been smoking more than usual. Conceivably all three.
You grimace, staring at the wall as you contemplate his words. “You promise you’ll leave me alone after?”
“Anything.”
He’s so quick to respond that it tugs at your heart strings. Why is everything about this interaction so unfamiliar? Where’s the Sukuna you know? Even as he had begun to open up over the last month, you’d never seen him like this. His hand is still fidgeting with something in his pocket, the faint sounds of metal scraping ringing out from his pocket, he keeps shooting glances back at your friends, and his usual air of confidence has fizzled out to nothing.
Then there’s his appearance. His hair is disheveled, pushed back and sticking out on all sides as though he’s been running his hand non-stop through it. His face is gaunt from a lack of sleep based on the dark circles under his eyes and his jaw has been clenched since the moment he arrived. In fact, that might be the only part of this encounter that is familiar, he looks about as angry as usual.
“Fine,” you sigh after a moment, observing the way he exhales in relief.
“Come with me?” He asks, nodding his head towards the door.
Kento and Shoko exchange an uncertain glance as you turn back towards the table and grab your coat and pack your backpack again.
“Call us if you need anything,” Kento speaks up, loud enough for Sukuna to hear as the two men throw scowls at one another. Sukuna knows he’s in the wrong, but he still doesn’t care for this protective behaviour Ken, as you called him, is throwing his way. You’re more than capable of taking care of yourself.
“Thanks, Kento,” you whisper with a dry attempt at a smile.
With one final challenging stare at the blonde, Sukuna turns to lead the way as you pull your coat on and follow him out into the cold. The snow has been piling up over the weekend, crunching beneath your feet and allowing the cold to seep into you, chilling you straight to your bones. You zip your jacket up further, wrapping your arms around yourself as you follow after Sukuna.
He glances back at you, at the way you’re obviously cold and struggling to keep in step with him given the height of the snow banks he’s trudging through. He diverts his path until you’re both in a spot that’s been cleared and you’re able to steadily keep pace with him, although you still keep a small distance back.
The air between you is heavy with unspoken words, and Sukuna knows he’ll deserve everything you throw his way, though it doesn’t make him anymore eager to get to his destination and keep his mouth shut.
“Where are we going?” Your voice is meek, and those sharp crimson irises observe you quietly from ahead for a moment before he replies.
“For lunch.”
“Oh, I actually brought my own lun-” Your words die in your throat at the sight of his brow twitching as he stares back at you. “Okay.”
You just need to grin and bear it through the next twenty or so minutes, and then you can ask him never to bother you again.
Keeping your eyes on the snow as it kicks up with each step, you’re silent for the remainder of your walk. You keep yourself a few feet back at all times, only catching up once he finally reaches his destination and holds the door as he waits for you to catch up. You pause at the entrance of the building, finding a cafe sign hung above the door.
With a nearly inaudible ‘thanks’, you slip past Sukuna into the building. You both pull your hoods down as you take a look around the cafe. Although it’s only a few blocks from the college, you’ve never been inside.
The interior is decorated in warm orange hues with deep wooden floors and plants lining the walls. There’s shelves from floor to ceiling filled with loaves of bread and a display at the front filled with pastries. Two menus hang above the back of the counter with sandwiches, soups, and salads, alongside cozy looking drink options. You make your way up to the counter slowly, followed closely by Sukuna.
“Get whatever you want,” he grumbles in a tone that would make anyone else think he’s frustrated with you, but it lacks the usual growl that would give that indication.
“Hm? Are you sure?” You ask uncertainly, knowing his financial situation all too well.
He nods. Luckily for Sukuna, he took an extra shift and he thanks whatever god will listen that he did and he can afford to buy you lunch. He owes you more than just food, but it’s a start and he hopes he can convince you to give him a chance to prove himself.
He brings a hand up to scratch his chin, the first signs of stubble poking through his skin and faintly visible around his jaw. It’s a good look on him although he clearly just hasn’t had time or bothered to shave.
“What’s good here?” You query, doing whatever you can to ease the discomfort between you, even though you want to tear into him for what he did.
“Ya haven’t been here?” He quirks a brow questioningly. You’re so close to the college he assumed you would have been. “I like the chicken and beef barley soups. The deli sandwich is good too,” he shrugs.
After a moment, you settle on a small soup and a grilled cheese, letting your attention wander to the plants as you wait for the food while Sukuna pays. Neither of you dare to interrupt the tense understanding keeping both of you from saying something you may regret, allowing the silence to suffocate you.
Even once your lunch is ready and the two of you find a quiet seat in the back corner of the cafe, it does nothing to ease the growing anger threatening to boil over as this frustrating man can’t even so much as apologize.
“How’s your food?”
You drop your spoon into the bowl. It clatters against the edge with a sound that startles the poor employee behind the counter, but your attention is stuck on the man in front of you. The stupid man who can’t bother to start with the one thing you truly want from him.
“You know I’m not happy with you, right?”
His gaze flickers between the spoon and your eyes, which are filled with a blazing fire he’s never seen from you before. He sighs, setting his own spoon down as he sits up. “Figured as much when you didn’t email me.”
“Oh, not emailing you back was what tipped you off that I might be upset? Not-”
“I know, I know.” He’s strangely somber as he accepts the way you’re tearing into him. “I didn’t mean to miss the presentation.” He hunches forward over the table on his forearms, his shoulders tense. There’s no subtle cocky bravado behind his demeanor as there usually is, he’s simply… here, listening intently.
Shaking your head, you chew on your lip as you do what you can to subdue your anger. “I’m sure you didn’t mean to miss our other meetings too, but you really had me thinking this time was different.”
“C’mon, those other times weren’t a big deal,” he gruffs, his forearms visibly bulging as he flexes the muscles. He’s doing his best to keep his frustration at bay.
“No, they weren’t. But this time, you signed me up for public speaking. I told you I didn’t want to do it. I even trusted you with my insecurities, and I thought because of that, this time would be different.” You swallow hard, shaking your head as you fight back tears. “But your word doesn’t mean anything, does it?”
“That’s-” His hand balls into a fist as he growls out the beginning of a sentence, but the sharp look you give him has him re-thinking his words. His hand relaxes, his fingers tapping on the table as he diverts his attention to a plant on the wall. “That’s not fair,” he manages, strained.
“How is that not fair? You told me you would handle it and you knew how I felt about presenting. How is that fair to me?” Your voice is low, somewhere between a whisper and a yell as you try to keep your voice down and more importantly even despite the tears pricking at your eyes.
Sukuna adjusts the way he’s sitting, his hunger subsiding at the sight of your growing frustration with him. “It’s… not fair to you.” All he can do is agree, because he knows he deserves this.
“So why couldn’t you grow a pair and at least warn me you wouldn’t be there? I could have prepared something at least!” You make a motion in the air with your hand in disbelief as your rage grows.
Sukuna’s jaw tightens as memories of why he missed the presentation flood his mind and god how he wants to walk out right now and not worry about you or your feelings, or hurting you, but that would be too simple for Sukuna’s life. No, whatever force of nature Sukuna had angered wanted him to suffer, wanted him to sit here and listen to your agony, pinned to the seat by his reverence for you.
He drags his hands over his face, shaking his head like a dog in an effort to come to his senses and come up with something to say.
His silence is somehow worse than his usual devil-may-care attitude. At least you know how to handle his arrogance and anger. His silence only serves to further the insult of his behavior. “You really have nothing to say about all of this?”
Sukuna has a million things to say, but his thoughts are so disorganized he doesn’t know how to make sense of what he wants to say. What needs to be said. He should have taken more time to come to terms with the gravity of the situation he’d gotten himself into, but he couldn’t bear the idea that you would be living with the thought that Sukuna had abandoned you. Yet he’s here now, with you, to disprove that and he doesn’t know what he can do to fix things with you. One misstep and he digs a deeper grave than the one he’s sitting in already.
That’s the thing about you. You’re the sun, able to brighten any room you walk into with so much as a smile, and Sukuna isn’t even the moon by comparison. He’s a distant star, flickering on the horizon but always outshone by those brighter. Even knowing this, he so selfishly doesn’t want to let you go. He hardly understands it himself, but he finds himself smiling more around you and that alone is worth the effort on his part.
“I’m sorry.” He blurts out a pathetic excuse for an apology, one that he knows won’t put out the fires he’s started, but it’s the best he can manage in his disheveled state.
You shut your eyes, letting out a long, dragging sigh. When you open them, you’re staring down at your reflection in your soup bowl, distorted by floating noodles. It’s a genuine apology, a rarity when it comes to him, but he’s lost your trust and good will. Of course there’s a part of you that wants to give him the benefit of the doubt, but he’s not giving you any reason to believe his words, let alone a reason to leave you sputtering over words at the front of your class last week.
Kento’s right. You don’t deserve to be constantly guessing, even if it tugs at your already fragile heart. Why did it have to be him that your heart decided to fixate on?
“I don’t know how I expected this to go, but I guess I should have known this would happen,” you mumble, getting to your feet and grabbing your coat. You need to leave now before you second-guess yourself.
“Wait-! Fuck…” Sukuna’s on his feet in an instant, unable to look you in the eye as he reaches for your wrist, staring at the point where your skin connects like it’s burning him.
“Shit, just…” He hesitates, his jaw tightening. “Gimme a moment.” He doesn’t dare let you go out of fear you’ll leave, his other hand dipping into his pocket as he fiddles with his broken lighter again.
It takes him a moment to gather himself but finally he finds his footing.
“Look, I owe you. I know I fuckin’ owe you, okay? It was a piece of shit move.” He finally meets your gaze, his resolve hardening. “I shoulda been there, I- I got caught up with something. I didn’t mean to miss it and I-” he hesitates, “- I’m beggin’ you to trust me.”
“Why should I trust you? You’ve never given me any reason to. This is just a shitty excuse to use me as a free babysitter again,” you shrug, trying to use reason so as not to fall for the excuses he’s sputtering that your heart so desperately wants to cling to.
His face contorts in disbelief. “Why the fuck would I care about that?”
“If that’s not what this is about, then what is it about? Because if you cared about me at all, you would have been there.”
“Fuck- No- That’s not-” He huffs, his anger threatening to boil over. Running his spare hand through his hair, he grumbles another curse under his breath. “Prom Queen-”
“Don’t call me that.” He knows that’s the cause of your humiliation in the first place, to bring it up right now is downright cruel.
“- Somethin’ happened- with the kids. I didn’t forget. I wanted to be there, I swear on my life that something came up.”
You pause, contemplating his words as he finally gives you some semblance of a reason for his absence, and it’s the exact reason you’d expressed to Kento that had you still worried over the man’s dumb ass. An emergency, a reason to be worried about him, even if he didn’t deserve that kindness from you.
“What happened?” You ask cautiously, sitting back down. Sukuna breathes out a sigh of relief and releases your wrist when you sit back down with him.
“It’s nothin’ I can’t handle, but I need you to believe me. I don’t care that you were babysitting the brats. And that wasn’t free anyway.”
It was, but you’ll let that slide.
Your brow furrows. “What is this about then? Since when do you care about anyone other than your brothers or yourself?”
“Christ, I’m not heartless,” he mutters, shutting his mouth when you shoot him a glare. Yeah, he deserves that. “I care. I do care.” He runs his tongue over his lower lip.
“You didn’t seem to care when you didn’t talk to me for a week and a half straight.”
“I thought we already established that I was a dick for that,” he grumbles, frowning.
“That was when this was a one-time thing. Twice, Sukuna? Really? How am I supposed to trust you when you pulled the same stunt again so soon?” You grimace, quietly observing the way his finger is tapping the table in sync with his leg shaking. At the very least, he doesn’t seem to be lying.
“I don’t expect you to, just give me a chance. Gimme a chance to prove I mean it.”
Kento would kill you for even entertaining the thought, yet… you can’t help it.
“Can you at least tell me what happened?”
Sukuna sighs, leaning back and crossing his arms. If ever there was a time to tell you what happened, it should be now. But Sukuna can’t bear the thought of bogging down your life with more issues than what he’s already thrust upon you. “I don’t want you involved in it.”
“You’re not doing yourself any favors by not telling me.”
“I know,” he frowns, “but I don’t want you involved. It’s messy and complicated and I know you and I know you like to stick your nose in my fuckin’ business,” he scowls at the thought.
“You could at least be nice to me since you’re trying to apologize.” You grimace, exasperated with the attitude he’s throwing your way. You’re tired of his bullshit and who can blame you?
“Right. Sorry. I’m an asshole.” He sees the gears turning in your mind. “I’m a dick,” he tries to appeal to you. Had he blinked, he could have missed the way your lips twitched at the corners into the smallest hint of a smile. ���Just give me one chance.”
You stare down at your soup, which is surely cold by now, scrutinizing him as you think things through. Your silence is nothing short of miserable for Sukuna, but he’ll give you all the time in the world if he can have your kindness for one more second.
It’s that same kindness that you just know Shoko and Kento are going to absolutely kill you for as you let out a prolonged sigh after weighing your options. “One chance, Sukuna. One.” Maybe you’re naive for it, but you want to believe that whatever reason he had is a good one.
To your surprise, there’s no irritated grumble or begrudging sigh from him. No notes of disapproval. He simply nods.
“And you have to help me study.”
“Deal.”
“Oh! And you have to come eat lunch with me on campus again.”
His lip curls up in distaste. “Your friends don’t like me.”
“They’ll come around,” you shrug. “Oh! And-”
“Alright, alright. Don’t push your luck, woman,” Sukuna grumbles, leaning on his fist. You giggle at him and although he knows things aren’t back to normal, it’s a start. He’s not stupid enough to think he’s fixed everything right away, but even if it doesn’t quite reach your eyes, he’s thrilled to at least see that you’re smiling.
That smile that’s like the sun.
The rest of lunch is quieter than usual, the regular cadence of your conversations never fully returning.
“How are Choso and Yuji? Is everything alright now?”
The burly man’s eyes seem to dull at the question as they stay fixed on the soup he’s eating. “They’ll be fine.”
His reaction is anything but reassuring. He doesn’t seem nearly as sure of himself as usual, choosing instead to push the question aside. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
Fuck, is he ever difficult sometimes.
“You know, if we’re gonna try to be friends, I’d appreciate it if you gave me something to work with here,” you offer a wry smile, your best attempt at lightening the air. He shoots you a glance, spooning more soup into his mouth as he leans on his palm against the table.
“It’s been a shitty weekend,” he answers. Well, that doesn’t really give you anything to work with, but at least he’s being honest with you. You fall silent again, the steady clinking of spoons against porcelain and the buzzing of a lunch rush behind you seeming to fall to the wayside in favor of a quiet understanding that things aren’t quite back to normal.
“Am I allowed to ask how the presentation went or would I be digging my own grave?” Sukuna asks over a spoonful of soup after an extended silence.
“I humiliated myself, what do you want me to say?”
“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,” he tries to reassure you, though it comes across empty.
You’re reminded of the laughter and judgmental glares, setting your spoon down as the reigns of anxiety stir in your stomach at the thought.
“I’m sorry, Pr-” he hesitates, his jaw tightening as the new meaning of his go-to nickname sinks in. “- Princess. I hope you at least took credit for my bullshit.”
“I did.”
Sukuna offers a proud smile. “Good girl.”
You blink down at your soup as your stomach does a backflip and your cheeks heat up, and all you can do is pray that he hasn’t noticed the effect that his words had on you.
It’s not long before you’ve both finished your meals over relative silence. “Um- thanks for lunch.”
“Yeah. No problem,” Sukuna gruffs.
“I should go.”
“Let me walk you back,” he insists, as though the uneasy silence wasn’t enough for him. With a lopsided smile, you grab both of your trays and dispose of the trash before you find yourself back out in the cold again.
Sukuna mindlessly fiddles with the lighter in his pocket again, a reminder that he needs to figure out how to put it back together, much like his friendship with you, if he can even call it that.
In an effort to mend things, you turn towards him as you wait to cross the street, smiling shyly. “You know, I do appreciate the effort, Sukuna. I honestly didn’t think you’d really bother trying.”
He scowls. “Sometimes you’re too honest.” He sighs, but he can’t be too upset when you’re giggling again, even if it’s at his expense. “But, that’s fai- shit!” He cuts himself off, whipping his hand from his pocket in a flash as he pats his jacket down.
Your lips are pursed as you watch him, puzzled by what he’s doing. That is, until a puff of smoke leaves his pocket. You blink at him.
“Did you just…”
“Shut up.”
“Light yourself on fire?”
“I said shut up,” he hisses, his cheeks reddening. He’ll blame the cold if you ask, but he’s embarrassed beyond belief, his cool exterior crumbling as he somehow managed to spark a flame in his own damn pocket.
You bite down hard on your lip in an effort to stop yourself from laughing.
“Don’t. Don’t fucking laugh.” He snarls, flashing you a glare.
But being told not to do something only makes it that much harder.
“You’re-” A laugh bubbles between your words and you do your best to swallow it. “You’re okay right?” You strain through your barely-contained chortles.
With a peek into his pocket, he pulls out the lighter, lid, and hinge pin, tossing them into the opposite pocket as he pats down his coat once more. “Yeah, seems fine now.”
Well if he’s fine- you absolutely double over in laughter, unable to bear holding it in any longer.
“Oh, laugh it up, short stuff,” he grumbles, dusting whatever ashes had clung to his skin off onto his jeans. He grits his teeth as he watches you double over at his expense, his cheeks no less red than they were a minute ago as the crimson glow spreads to his ears.
At least this time he can blame the cold, or the fire.
Not that you’d believe him.
As your giggles finally subside, Sukuna’s able to relax more than he has since Friday at the sight of your eyes crinkling at the corners in genuine happiness. Maybe embarrassing himself in front of you isn’t so bad, if it brings back a semblance of the connection he’d been chasing since he found you in the lunch hall.
Wiping tears from the corners of your eyes, you tilt your head. Cute. “How did that even happen? Don’t lighters have like a- a-” you wrack your brain, turning your attention to the overcast sky. “Like a safety or something?”
Sukuna digs a hand into his pocket that isn’t singed, holding the base of his lighter out to you. “It might have, but it’s broken.”
Curiously, you run your hand over the broken hinge, flipping the lighter over. The name ‘Itadori’ is carved in cursive across the back.
“Itadori?”
Sukuna hums. “My dad.”
Your face softens. “I think it can be fixed.” You hold it back out to him and he tucks it back in place.
“Maybe.”
Now that Sukuna’s not literally on fire, you’re able to cross the street and head back to the library where you’re sure you’ll find Kento and Shoko.
“Are you gonna join us?”
“Another time. I gotta take care of some shit.”
“Thanks for lunch. See you around, Sukuna.”
Before you can turn away, his fingers brush your wrist, as if he’s hesitant to stop you.
“Thank you,” he breathes quietly.
You smile.
–
“You have got to be fucking kidding me.”
“Sho, please, you weren’t there!” You try to insist.
“Girl. I’m begging you, you’re better than him.”
To nobody’s shock or awe, Shoko and Kento are equally as unimpressed that you’ve given Sukuna another chance. It comes from a place of concern, of course, but they insist you’re letting him walk all over you.
“There was an emergency with-” you cut yourself off with a glance at Nanami. You suppose you can’t go airing out Sukuna’s personal business to him given that he doesn’t know about the kids. “There was a family emergency,” you insist, “it was an accident.”
“You believe that bullshit?” Shoko’s whipping an unlit cigarette through the air like it’s a sword and it’s you she’s aiming to strike.
“I don’t think it’s bullshit,” you mumble.
With a sullen sigh, Kento finally speaks up in an unimpressed tone. “Had we not just discussed that you deserve better?”
You wince, his words searing. “He made a mistake. Accidents happen, Ken.”
“Hell of an accident,” Shoko shakes her head. “You’re actually hopeless.”
Pouting, you look to Kento for backup, but he doesn’t seem to be in agreement either.
“Give him a break,” you whine, “he literally lit himself on fire today.”
There’s a collective hum of confusion from both of your friends.
“He was messing with a lighter in his pocket and he accidentally lit his pocket on fire,” you grin.
Shoko scoffs. “That’s almost impressive, between the safety and the lack of oxygen in his pocket.”
“Well, the safety was broken,” you reason.
“Hah. Dumbass,” she snorts, exchanging a glance with Nanami. “Just… be careful with him, okay? He’s got a short fuse and a whole boatload of baggage that you and your scholarship don’t need to be involved in.”
“Don’t let him step on you,” Kento pleads in a tone unfamiliar to you.
Your brow furrows as you observe him, but his expression is aloof as ever. “I know, I know. I’ll be careful, I promise.”
–
It’s cold as you slip into the lobby of Sukuna’s building the following evening. You’d re-opened your email tab the previous night to find a message from him.
[email protected] - Monday, 8:58 PM busy tomorrow? kids wanna see ya
[email protected] - Monday, 9:39 PM Just the kids want to see me? ;)
[email protected] - Monday, 9:47 PM you coming or not
You could envision his scowl from behind the screen as you teased him, a stupid smile on your face at the thought of it. Things may not be back to normal, but your heart certainly isn’t aware of that as it palpitates at every thought of him.
Now, as you make your way up to his apartment with your GameCube, you don't really know what to expect.
The moment you crack the door to his apartment, you’re bombarded by Yuji in a tight hug as he’s practically leaping into your arms in utter excitement. Caught off-guard, you barely manage to catch him as he excitedly chants your name.
“We missed you!” He grins as you let him up onto your shoulders, ruffling Choso’s hair while he calmly smiles in greeting.
“That’s enough,Yu,” Sukuna mutters from the stove. He’s dressed in a pair of jeans, that same painfully tight black tank top from last week and a red plaid shirt that hangs loosely from his shoulders. A pair of wireless black headphones sits atop his head, but he pulls them down around his neck as you enter the apartment.
Yuji pouts as he begins to clamber down from your shoulders, landing with a thump! back on the floor before hopping over to the TV again.
Bringing you around the kids is likely a part of Sukuna’s scheme to bring things back to normal, now that you’re seeing him again. Kids are smart, too smart at times and they would know if something is wrong.
The apartment is warm in contrast to the cold winter evening, the smell of fried chicken wafting through the air. You bound up to Sukuna, peeking around his side. “I didn’t know you could cook.”
He clicks his tongue. “D’you think I feed them takeout for every meal?” He arches a brow as he looks over his shoulder at you.
“Maybe,” you simper, looking over the ingredients. There’s a rice cooker with a steadily descending clock and he’s frying up some chicken. “Katsu?”
“Mm.”
“It smells great!” You grin, turning back to give Sukuna space to cook as you head back towards Choso and Yuji. “So, I hear you two missed me?” You chide, your heart filled with warmth when Yuji eagerly nods and launches into a story from school that he’d been wanting to tell you since last week. You listen attentively and his eyes shine when you laugh along with him.
“Give her some space, brat. Come grab plates,” Sukuna instructs calmly, once Yuji’s story is over. He’s more at ease than he has been in a while, and even with the weight of everything going on in his life piled on his shoulders, he feels the familiar pull of your gravity keeping him grounded.
Like some sort of drug, you just seem to relieve his tension merely with your presence. You really are like the sun, warming his skin and lulling his worries to a dull buzz.
As Yuji excitedly runs over to Sukuna in the kitchen, Choso gingerly approaches you. “Thanks for coming.” His tone suggests he knows a portion of what happened between you and Sukuna and he’s grateful you’d give his idiot older brother another chance. Smart kid, just like you thought.
You return his smile. “How’ve you been, Cho?”
“I’m good. Um-” his gaze flickers briefly to the back of the apartment where Sukuna has his arms crossed over his chest as he watches Yuji set the table, handing the little boy three four plates. Choso’s voice lowers as he continues. “I think something’s wrong. Um- with Kuna.”
You tilt your head, following the little boy’s gaze. Sukuna doesn’t seem much different from any other time you’ve seen him. His skin is still somewhat gaunt, but he looks better than yesterday, no longer under duress. “What do you mean?” You prod softly.
“I don’t know,” he shrugs, perplexing you. “Someone came to the house on Friday,” he tells you. Your lips purse at the realization that Friday was your presentation. Maybe his reason for missing your presentation is bigger than he’s letting on. “He seemed mad at them and then he was gone most of the night.”
“He seems fine now,” you comment, but you don’t know Sukuna well enough to know who could have angered him at the door. “Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. I’m sure your brother’s fine. I’ll keep an eye on him.”
Choso nods, sunken eyes following Yuji’s movements as he places napkins around the table. It’s not long before you’re all seated with a plate of chicken katsu curry.
“Thanks, Kuna!” Yuji cheers gleefully, digging in immediately. His mild expression cracks as he picks up his utensils, eyes flickering around the table to his two little brothers before landing on you. He may only hum in response to Yuji, but you see the subtle gleam in his eye, along with something else that you can’t quite identify. Sadness?
Choso’s words echo in your mind, but you can’t find any other sign of anything being wrong. You settle on keeping an eye on him, smiling gratefully at him for making you dinner. The meal is filled with Yuji’s imaginative rambles as he shares stories from school and stories that may only be about forty percent true. Kids, right? Either way, you laugh along and grin at him.
“You know,” you begin once all of your plates are clean, “if you go check my backpack, I brought something for you guys.”
Like cartoon characters, both kids’ eyes widen and they bolt off towards the living room, two bundles of thrilled laughter as their full attention turns towards the GameCube tucked into your bag.
As you join Sukuna with two empty plates where he’s cleaning up in the kitchen, he casts a glance at you. “You’re too good to them.”
Placing your hands on the counter beside him, you shrug. “I just like spoiling them.”
“I see that. They ask about you a lot.” Your heart swells. You’re not a grinch, but you think your heart grew three sizes just now.
“I think they get it from you,” you tease, poking his bicep. He scowls down at you, rolling his shoulder as though it’ll rebuke your teasing.
“They didn’t,” he grumbles, turning towards the sink and flipping on the tap to run water over the plates.
You follow his movement, leaning against the counter beside him. “Is that why you’re being so grumpy about it? Because they don’t get it from you?” You grin, giving him a bright smile.
Sukuna’s lips curl into a devious smirk and before you know it, he lifts his hand from the running water and flicks it at your face. His smile widens to a grin when you jump, squealing in shock.
“Sukunaaa!” You cry, wiping the water from your cheeks and forehead with the back of your hand.
He chuckles, making a point of letting the water run over his hand again as he shoots you a sly smirk.
“Don’t you dare,” you hiss, brow furrowed. But when has Sukuna ever listened?
He subtly flicks more water at you, chuckling when you swat his bicep and go to join his little brothers on the couch with a pout that’s just too cute. Both kids move to the floor as the familiar sounds of Kirby Air Ride fill the room and Sukuna joins you on the couch, sitting just close enough that his knee brushes your leg.
“You’re studying English Lit, yeah?”
You nod, shuffling slightly closer to Sukuna to hear him over the TV. “Yeah, this is my last year. I’m hoping I can line something up in the next couple of months.”
“What do you wanna do?” He queries, leaning towards you just enough to give you the impression he’s seeking your warmth.
“A book editor!” You grin, eyes shining.
He lifts a brow. “You wanna read half-baked books for a livin’?”
You can’t help but laugh. “Sure, something like that.”
Amused, Sukuna smiles, relaxing into the couch.
“Have you thought more about what you want to do?” You ask cautiously, tilting your head as you prod at Sukuna’s reinforced walls.
A muscle in his jaw ticks. “No,” he grumbles, pulling his gaze down to his lap. Before you can push him any further, he glances at his watch and gets to his feet. “Be right back.”
You purse your lips as he hurries out of the room as though he has something to do. Sighing, you grab your bag that’s sitting on the floor by Choso, dragging it to your feet in search of the gum that you know is buried somewhere in its depths. You offer some to both of the boys before tossing your bag aside when something grabs your attention.
A torn piece of paper is on the ground at your feet, it must have slid out from under the couch when you had pulled your bag to your feet. That’s not all that unusual given all three of them are students, but the logo on the paper catches your eye.
Decorated in greens, you recognize the bold logo of a law office on the other side of town. A crease forms in your brow as you stare at the logo, but the paper has been torn in a way that all you can really see is the logo and that it addresses Ryomen Sukuna.
Could that have been Sukuna’s dad? No, that wouldn’t make sense if his lighter belonged to his father and ‘Itadori’ is engraved into its side. It had to be Sukuna himself. You suppose you’ve never actually heard anyone refer to him by another name, but the name is fitting somehow, even if he chooses not to use it.
The sound of footsteps alerts you to Sukuna’s return and you tuck the paper back where it belongs, or at least where you found it. The nosey and concerned part of you wants to prod, especially given the apprehension Choso expressed to you earlier, but you know better than to push Sukuna’s limits.
Sukuna rounds the corner with tense shoulders, tilting his neck to either side as he cracks it.
“Everything alright?”
“Yeah, just didn’t wanna hear you nagging about what I wanna do.” There’s a little more fire behind his words than usual and you sense that this is not the time to be asking why in the hell there’s legal papers torn up under his couch like a rabid mutt got a hold of them.
“A little dramatic, don’t you-”
“Be nice, Kuna!” Yuji yells suddenly, pausing his game.
Sukuna’s jaw slacks in disbelief at his little brother. “Pay attention to your game, brat,” he hisses.
“No! You’re gonna scare her off again! Meanie!”
“That’s it-” With a gleam in his eye, Sukuna lunges forward and tosses Yuji over his shoulder. He’s met with thunderous giggles as the little boy kicks and wriggles in an attempt to escape from his older brother. “You know what happens to kids who get in their older brother’s way?”
“NOOoooO!” Yuji cries out between giggles as he pushes his absolute hardest against the mass of muscles that is Sukuna. Choso is quietly laughing as he watches Sukuna toss his brother onto the couch, albeit gently. “No no no nononono!” Yuji puts his hands up in an attempt to block Sukuna, who pretends to sit on his brother, though you can see he’s not putting his full weight on poor little Yuji.
Putting only an ounce of his weight on his little brother, he slyly grins at you as you laugh along with the siblings, your eyes shining. He may be just about the most hardened and irritated (or maybe irritat-ing) man you’ve ever met, but it’s clear just how much he loves his brothers, even if he could use some time away from them.
“Kunaaaaaa!!” Yuji cries, weakly pushing against him.
“D’ya hear that? Almost sounds like my little brother, except it can’t be because he was a little shit,” Sukuna snorts, only to be met with giggles. You bring a hand up to your mouth as you laugh along with the poor little boy.
“Let me gooooooo!!”
“You done bein’ a brat?”
“Yesss I promise, yesss!!”
Sukuna stands up as Yuji dramatically rolls off the couch, feigning being dead. Sukuna plops back down beside you and runs a hand through his locks, mirth swirling in those striking crimson irises of his.
“You’re still a meanie,” Yuji sticks his tongue out at Sukuna, a mischievous gleam in his eye as he scoots closer to the TV, but Sukuna only rolls his eyes this time. “Don’t scare her.”
“If your brother keeps tutoring me, I’ll be back before you know it,” you reassure the young boy who grins brightly before his attention turns back to the TV. “Speaking of which, I should get going. My final project for Women’s Lit is due tomorrow at midnight.”
You begin gathering your things, pausing as you realize you would have to unplug the GameCube to pack up all of your things, so you settle on pretending to forget it, hoping that Sukuna isn’t paying attention, his eyes locked on the TV.
Checking to make sure you have your phone, wallet, and keys, you cast one last glance at the corner of the piece of paper beneath the couch that’s just barely sticking out, debating doing some snooping later.
To your delight as the boys hug you goodbye and Sukuna follows you to the door, he either forgets about the gaming console or lets it slide this time, leaning against the door frame.
“You make a mean chicken katsu,” you beam, “thanks again for dinner.”
“Mm. Thanks for the second chance.”
Your smile softens.
“I got work at one on Thursday. You up to watch the kids? If you drop by earlier, we can study beforehand.” He leans his head down to your level, the warmth of his breath fanning your face as he can’t resist flustering you at least once each time you visit. “And y’know, you never did get to tell me the third thing I owe ya,” he hums, his voice low and sultry.
Your breath hitches at the implication behind his tone and before you know it, you’re stumbling back away from his close proximity, fumbling for the button for the elevator as the rickety old door slides open with a jarring screech.
“See you on- uh- Thursday.”
“See you then,” he chuckles.
This man will be the absolute death of you.
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❦ a/n ; hiii loves! i hope you all enjoyed <33 very angst heavy chapter, i'm sorry :((( i absolutely adored writing sukuna's horrible day, the poor guy. i also had to consult my friend who's a lawyer on how one gets served documents, what a confusing process and i'm sure she was even more confused why i was asking her LMAO.
anywayyy i just wanted to say that the comments and tags and asks you guys have been sending in seriously make my day and i'm so here for it. thank you all so much for all the love and support <33 as always, it's super appreciated <33
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Why There’ll Never Be Another Good Omens 2 Experience
The strangest thing happened after a few days post my watching of S2. I got a wave of real, bittersweet sadness.
Not due to the obvious – I was dealing with that too, but with more excitement than anything – but because I realized something, as a writer and consumer of media. I realized that it’s unlikely I’ll ever get a media experience close to what I experienced at the end of Good Omens 2. Because really, its setup was absolutely unparalleled – in general, and for myself personally.
I am currently writing my third romance, and what I’ve learned primarily about the genre, the way for it to really work, is that there needs to be something keeping the couple apart initially. The more things keeping the couple apart, the stronger the romance hits. The more the couple clashes with each other, the better it is. Societal norms, class issues, initial dislike, literal danger—all these aspects are what make a romance a story. It’s that conflict that creates the compelling narrative. No romance was ever popular because things worked out well from the beginning – it’s that “look at what we were, and look at us now” aspect that gives readers/watchers that satisfaction. It’s the “I can’t believe this happened” effect. The “I would never have foreseen this” effect. The “they’ll never be together” effect. It’s why forbidden romances are so incredibly popular.
Another aspect that makes a romance story really work well is the amount of time it takes for the romance to develop. A couple that gets together after a few days? Eh, it’s tricky. You better make it really dramatic somehow. A great example is Titanic – class differences, betrothal, and a huge amount of danger threatens this couple, so them being in love after only a few days works. But what really sells this one is because we can see how this romance has survived beyond those few days. We see it 80 years in the future, still there, in the memory of Rose. That is why it hits so hard. Romances that span over long periods of time (especially ones that are bittersweet/tragic) hit so much more than ones spanning a short period.
But wait! There’s more!
You can up this effect by not only having the romance take time in story…but having it take time in real life, for the viewer/reader.
This is why romances in TV shows that take years to finally work out are so compelling. It’s that “Pam and Jim” effect, that will-they-won’t-they deal. We are waiting right along with them, and we’re feeling that same relief when all those things keeping them apart finally fall away. This is harder to pull off, because there’s never that guarantee that the story will make it that far. TV shows get cancelled, creators lose interest or die, etc. So it’s not just “Will They, Won’t They,” it’s “Will They, Won’t They, Can They Even Try?”
This is also compounded by that fear that it won’t happen in-story after all, and while in romances you’re pretty positive that things work out (they kinda have to, for it to be labeled a “romance”) in other media, there’s always that possibility. Look at Community – there’s a forbidden/conflict-ridden romance that didn’t end up working out, even though it was “Will They, Won’t They”d for six entire seasons. You also then have shows and ships where fans are almost sure it won’t happen, but still hold out hope. (See: Supernatural, Sherlock, etc.)
Now. Now look at Good Omens. Look at that absolutely unparalleled, unbelievable set up. It’s unbelievable because it takes almost every single thing that makes a romance compelling, and not only uses all of them, but dials them up to 11.
Why are they at odds? Why are they forbidden from being together?
Because they are literally the most opposing forces you can imagine in Western Canon. They are the Angel Guarding The Gate and The Serpent of Eden. The literal only way you could’ve made this a bigger deal would’ve been to make it God and Satan, and even that would’ve not hit as hard, because it’d be like two CEOs getting together – there’s no fear of a higher power adding that delicious conflict. And to add to all this, in real life, the couple is portrayed as two men, which adds that second meta level of conflict.
And what fear/danger is keeping this couple apart?
Not just familial disappointment—but disappointment from God and Heaven and Hell. Not just moral guilt, but the guilt of potentially dooming the entire Earth. And finally, on top of that, the very real danger of being killed. Not only that, but making it as though you never even existed.
And in real life, they face all those roadblocks that queer couples in media have been battling for years and years, but I'll talk about that more in a second.
Okay, then Time. How long have they been kept apart?
For…all of it.
All of the time that ever existed.
They, quite literally, could not have been kept apart longer.
And this leads into those final two points, the ones that actually really sell it. Because I can sit down right now and write a story about an angel and a demon falling for each other at the beginning of time against all odds…but what I can’t do is to have already written it thirty-three years ago.
That’s how long this story has existed. Thirty. Three. Years.
I’m not even counting how this is using characters that have existed as opposing forces for thousands of years. I’m not even saying that, even though that’s also a part of it. But besides that, this story, this exact story started thirty-three years ago, and is still being continued by the author to this day.
Do you know how uncommon that is?
Yes, we have canon that has lasted for many, many years. Hundreds. We get new versions of beloved older stories ever year. But it’s so very rare that they are by the same creator. We get new Sherlock Holmes content, but it is not written by Arthur Conan Doyle. This, on the other hand, is actual canon content, written by the author of the original. That is unbelievably rare.
That means we’ve got a fandom where some people have grown up with these characters. People who read it at twenty are fifty-three. People who read it at fifty are eighty-three. Kids who saw their parents reading the book now have children of their own. It is a cult classic that has been in the hearts of so many people for generations. Me, personally, I fell in love with it ten years ago, at age twenty, at the very beginning of my own writing journey. This story means so much to people, because it’s stood that test of time.
And yet, this story was never explicitly romantic. So many saw it that way, but it was never something confirmed. Because this was a book from the 90s, at a time where this kind of romance just wasn’t in popular media if it wasn’t played as a joke. It was, back then, the same kind of “forbidden” as a romance between angel and demon. So people imagined, but they never expected anything more. And they’ve continued not expecting more, because even in the 2019 first season, there was never any true confirmation of anything, and people accepted it. You have a 33-year-old story here – it’s possible that this major change/confirmation could happen, but all things considered, it was unlikely. You would never blame the creator for not making major developments to a story they wrote with their late friend a lifetime ago. And no one in production was saying a word to confirm or deny, but we’ve seen all this before. It was a Will-They-Won’t-They…Probably-Not situation.
And then you have the end of S2.
And that's where that bittersweet sadness comes in for me, personally. Not at a huge level, not to the point where I'd have it any other way, but it's there regardless. Because I realized that this was a unique situation that could never be replicated, for me, and likely for many, especially readers of the book pre-show. In all likelihood, I would never again experience a romantic payoff like this one. Because it was the most forbidden of forbidden romances, the couple of which have been kept apart by the worst of all dangers and highest level of guilt for the longest amount of time literally possible, written over a real-life span of time where this kind of romance went from “completely taboo even in real life” to “finally acceptable in popular media,” written by the same creator, and not confirmed as canon until the story reached the age of Jesus Christ himself.
And the real kicker is, even after everything these two literally star-crossed lovers have gone through…they’re still being kept apart. They’ve still not taken down those final, seemingly insurmountable barriers between them. It wasn’t a “here you go 😊” move to make long-time fans happy – it’s being used as a perfect, painful plot point. After 33 years, we’re still having to wait longer.
Chef's kiss. Couldn’t have been a better set up if it was mathematically calculated. And yet, the best part is that it happened organically.
It just works.
#good omens#good omens 2 spoilers#go2 spoilers#good omens 2#gos2 spoilers#good omens s2 spoilers#good omens spoilers#good omens season 2#good omens season 2 spoilers#gos2#good omens meta#good omens 2 meta#neil gaiman
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september love (e.m.)
eddie finds you awake on the first night he's home from the hospital, and wonders what you're thinking.
pairing: eddie munson x reader
warnings: mentions of canon ending of season 4, except eddie didn't die. mentions of hospital and medical procedures (in passing). sort of sad, sort of not. a little bit of angst? hurt/comfort. religious imagery (specific mentions of heaven).
wc: 1.7k+
an: this was just some sort of weird rambling upon seeing the poem mentioned above at like 11 pm? 1 am? who knows. time is a construct. also, reader is compared to a 'violent' dog/animal during eddie's recovery, and if you like this metaphor/vibe, then i strongly suggest and urge you to go read @myosotisa's fic Half Life. she does it far more beautifully than i ever could, and it is one of my favorite fics. ever.
Your head is on his chest.
Your temple and your ear are flush with the soft cotton of his wrinkled t-shirt, the one he insisted upon sleeping on his first night home, and it’s all you can think about. The smell of week old laundry, the stubborn linger of a cologne gifted too long ago to remember the worn name of. A steady heartbeat that still pumps along a little too slow for your liking. The rise and fall of each promised breath that you force your lungs to pace themselves with. Just enough heat radiating off of him to keep you warm, here in bed, here in the dim light of twilight as he rests.
No tubes and no IVs to worry about. No nurses barging in every ten minutes. No beeping of a dozen machines to be your symphony tonight.
No, you don’t need a machine now to keep track of his heart rate. You’ve learned to do that entirely on your own; your heart has learned how to match his with each dulled thump against the skin you cling to through this dingy old t-shirt.
It can’t be long after 3 AM, the moonlight almost as bright as a rising sun as it peeks itself in through the curtains of the window, as if whispering to check if you might still be awake.
And you are. And all you can think about, is your head on his chest.
It’s been over a month since you’ve had this type of moment with Eddie. A moment where you’re truly, sincerely, utterly alone with him. Privacy had become a delicacy that you weren’t aware of the fragility of. You hadn’t understood its importance until you had to bask in its absence, always on edge for the next body to walk into the room and take the air out of your lungs. Always anxious for the next sound of news, always worried for the next shoe to drop.
You’d forgotten what it had felt like for Eddie to twitch his fingers along your spine in his sleep, and for you to be the only witness to his quiet worship, even unconscious.
Your lips part, and you almost consider whispering hard truths into the trembling night air. There’s a million and one dying words cementing your tongue to the roof of your mouth, and you know that every single one you could even manage to utter would only make you sound like a broken record.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you.
I’m sorry I couldn’t prevent it.
All things already said to him when he had been drifting in and out of consciousness in that hospital bed. All apologies already buried between muted sobs as you’d clutched his knuckles a little tighter than you should have, a little too selfish in the moment to wonder if it might be hurting him. The only thing on your mind had been keeping him, holding him, feeling him. He was alive – he was alive. And for the first seven nights of his endless rest, all you could wonder is for just how much longer that desperate prayer could ring true.
Would he leave you again? Would he lose the fight?
You can’t recall without bias which one of you had been the true wounded animal in that little room, scented with burning bleach and cacophonies of nearby patients just beyond the curtains.
Eddie, looking up at the police who had finally come once he woke, eyes big and teary as he’d tried to wrap his head around his new reality.
You, baring teeth and claws at them in the end, ready to bite hard at anyone who got too close.
It wasn’t just the police. It was everyone.
It was the same juxtaposition between the two of you at those nurses who would interrupt the nights, always frowning so dutifully at the sight of your carefully curled figure at Eddie’s side. When friends and family came to visit, and they all had the same look of disbelief. As if they were about to tell you that you had imagined it all; he hadn’t survived, he hadn’t come back to you, you were imagining it. You’d been all bark and awaiting bite towards Steve Harrington and the newly revived Jim Hopper, all the same. Their figures bore no difference to you when it came to protecting what was so holy to you. Him, Eddie, here and alive. Eddie, who slept enough for the both of you those nights. The pain in your back from all the uncomfortable hours spent in that little chair at his bedside was insignificant, all the headaches you’d endured from the smell of iodine that still clung to the air after every surgery were pitiful attempts at the Universe removing you from him.
If you could, you might try to recall your reaction when Dustin Henderson had babbled on through tears as to what had happened to Eddie when the two were left alone. His final act of heroism, or so he thought.
But you can’t. Right here, right now, you aren’t capable of living in the past. You’ve been haunted enough these last few weeks, and all your numb mind can handle is counting the beats of his heart. Like the rhythm of a song – 1, 2, 3, 4. 1, 2, 3, 4. Staccato verses that you sometimes whisper in time, getting worried when they don’t follow the infallible metronome you’ve set for him.
“You’re still awake.”
The murmur of his voice is a drink of cold water, startling in the dark greys and blues wrapping the two of you up.
You lift your head ever so slightly against your better judgment, “Go back to sleep, love.”
“Touche.”
You can see his grin even through the shadows. It’s weak, not yet quite as vibrant as it once had been, but it’s there. He’s still alive. He’s still grinning.
“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” The pads of his fingertips are more intentional against your spine now, longer strokes and mindless shapes, “I’ve got a penny in my pocket if you tell me.”
His words are only slightly slurred. Probably residual of the pain medication they’d prescribed him.
“I wasn’t thinking about anything,” you say, and you mean it.
You hadn’t been thinking. You had just been listening to his heart and his breaths, feeling the weight of him beneath you.
Little things you had taken for granted once upon a time. Never again, your soul aches as you let your head drop back to his chest carefully. Never again.
“You’re just laying awake, not thinking about anything, at…” he trails off, turning his cheek and squinting in the direction of the alarm clock across the room. The glow is dim, and you know you’ll have to change the batteries soon, “Four in the morning?”
4 AM. Last you had checked, it had been 3 AM. You hadn’t even noticed an hour had passed.
“Is that really so hard to believe?” you smile up at him, and it’s just as sincere as your words had been. When his honey brown eyes meet yours, warmth drizzles down your entire being. Across your brain, down your spine, wrapping around your limbs. You could spend an eternity here, simmering in his warmth, content to your heart’s fullest capability.
You’d almost lost him. You’d almost lost this warmth.
You take a second to memorize his features. Studying him as if you didn’t already know every curvature, every freckle, every winkle better than you knew your own soul. You’re looking at him as if you may never look at him again, and he can tell.
He doesn’t have to say that he gets it. His hand simply wanders up to cup your face, basking in you as you were him. Two souls, intertwining over overlapping legs and synchronized heartbeats, and he doesn’t have to say a word.
The moment his fingers card into your baby hairs, you’re turning your mouth quickly to that warm palm. One, two, three kisses. Quick pecks, rapid succession. A secret language that you know he, and only ever he, can begin to understand.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
It drowns out all sorrow, all guilt, all hauntings. Your cracked lips, and the feeling of those lines across his palms. If there is a Heaven, it’s not somewhere in a pearly gated kingdom above. There are no hark angels and there is no bearded man awaiting.
It’s here. It’s now. It’s 4 AM, in bed with your lover, getting to experience moments you’d come so close to losing for eternity.
Do the poets know? They must. All the love, all the adoration, in both your bodies is too abundant for them to not feel it. To not write about it.
“Go back to bed, love,” you repeat almost a perfect imitation of your first command when he had awakened, and this time, his eyelids flutter with your words, “I’m not gonna disappear between now and sunrise. I promise.”
“No,” he quickly whispers back as his eyes fully shut, and your palms smooth out the wrinkles of the shirt to feel the ridges of scars hidden for now. Scars he’s ashamed of, for now. Scars you’d one day show all the love in the world to, sacred proof that he came back to you, only once he was ready. One day. “But you’re looking at me like I might.”
His words are heavy in the shades of violet now sinking into the room. But the moon is high in her sky, and the crickets are chirping to the East, and he’s right.
You’re terrified the daylight will steal him from you. You’re terrified the new day might tear away all that you’ve sunk your teeth into.
“I’m not going to,” he mumbles around a yawn, arms slowly encasing you, pulling you in closer, “I’m not going anywhere. Yeah?”
He’s back with that warmth, coaxing you right back into heavenly notions with him. You let him; he baits you, and you follow.
“Yeah.”
It’s a sigh. Of hopefulness, of relief, of belief.
This time, the I love you is more than a prayer repeated in your mind. And he somehow manages to say it back, just as he begins to slip back under. Still holding you and hands still twitching where they rest against your back.
Let daylight come. You aren’t capable of worrying about it, or stressing about all that has happened. You aren’t capable of thinking about anything right now, because only one thing matters as your temple and ear find his heartbeat once more.
Your head is on his chest.
eddie's taglist: @capricornrisingsstuff @thisisktrying @mediocredreams @vol2eddie @corrcdedcoffin
@ches-86 @alovesongtheywrote @its-not-rain @feralchaospixie @cheesypuffkins87
@thebook-hobbit @babez-a-licious @eddies-acousticguitar @aysheashea@kellsck
@cosmorant @billyhvrgrove-main @micheledawn1975 @eddiesxangel @siriuslysmoking
@witchwolflea @tlclick73 @magicalchocolatecheesecake @mizzfizz @nanaminswhore
@mikiepeach @ali-r3n @hawkebuckley @alwaysbeenfamous @darkyuffie-blog
@vintagehellfire @lilmisssiren @elvendria@loveryanax@stylexrepp
@princessstolas @fangirling-4-ever @eddiesguitarskills @babez-a-licious @josephquinnsfreckles
@writinginthetwilight @trixyvixx @kittydeadbones @munson-addict @bluejeangenies
@cryingglightningg @joannamuns9n @missmarch-99 @rhirojo@findmeincorneliastreet
#ghost's stories#eddie munson#stranger things#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson angst#eddie munson x you#eddie munson comfort#alright now to get ready for my tattoo appointment
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Celebrating 5k followers (and more!)
Thanks to everyone for reading, following along, and sharing! I am very happy to sit down every day and work on this story, and more happy to see others enjoy it as much as I do. This is the planned wallpaper that I had planned a while ago, but everyone’s kindness has brought many eyes to this story! Welcome, and thank you! Episode 11 has many milestones as we approach the plot’s climax for this season, and it is special to me as it is one of the first episodes I really wrote. Now we are officially in a new, creative era! I hope you enjoy where the story goes!
Thank you for your kindness in the asks and messages. I have saved each one! They bring me such light each day.
To all the anons who left a kind word, and to:
@undersea-anchor @floofballsammy @fondesmode @kaiseruniverse1871 @bees-not-boys @gourde @jasper-borealis @art-beyond-the-stars @attuned-caduceus @entrn4me @harumin24 @someone-very-shy12 @eryscalamitas @mintitheicecream @how2weirdo @skiter-cat-slaying @bean-counter29 @luxilic1ous @thetiredpenguin @backwaterotter @liminaltumbly
And all my friends on Discord who keep me afloat! Love you all! 🧡💕❤️
#pink onyx au#steven universe au#steven universe#steven universe future#c423art#ceephorart#pink onyx#jasper#fusion#steven#5k followers#wallpaper
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Day in Fandom History: June 11…
When Finn finds and touches a porcelain lamb, it teleports him into a world where no one but himself and the Ice King can see him and ends up teaming with the Ice King to find a way to escape. “Beyond this Earthly Realm” premiered on this day, 11 Years Ago.
#Day in Fandom History#11 Years Ago#Adventure Time#Season 4#Episode 11#Beyond this Earthly Realm#Cartoon#Animation
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Part 1: Simple Things
Masterlist -Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13
Cause your presence still lingers here (it won't leave me alone)
(In which a procrastinating writer starts another series to continuously procrastinate on)
Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd
Themes: Angst, Pining
Words: 5.8K (lowkey shocked I managed that)
TW: Swearing (I think that's it?)
A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 Look at me not being a liar! I'mma try to be good with updates but we all know me. This first chapter is mainly buildup and it's not my favorite but it's important to get the plot rolling. I know very little about California and it's going to become more and more apparent throughout this series so everyone who knows Cali, just pretend thanks! Did I edit? Yes. Are there probably still mistakes? Also yes. As always, let me know what you liked, what you disliked, and what you wanna see next!
February 2033
“Anywhere but GSV,” Paige says adamantly, staring at the white wall in front of her, instead of her exasperated agent.
Talia lets out a deep sigh, perfectly manicured sharp red nails tapping incessantly against her desk. For the most part, Paige is a dream client and when Talia says jump, she says how high. It’s easy to trust Talia’s vision when she hasn’t let her down once since Paige’s management company has assigned her to their basketball sensation. But most of those decisions had been about endorsement opportunities, opportunities that wouldn’t have other ramifications on the rest of Paige’s life, opportunities that didn’t come with personal consequences.
“Paige-”
“How about the Sparks?”
“They’re not offering nearly as much.”
“I’m okay with taking a pay-.”
“You do not pay me as much as you do for me to let you finish such a stupid sentence.”
“Fine,” Paige spins around in her swivel chair, “you’re telling me nobody else is offering me anything as big as GSV.”
“Well I mean Indiana…” Talia trails off, barely able to hide an impish grin at Paige’s pronounced eyeroll, “and of course you could always just stay in Dallas.”
Paige winces at the mention of the current team. With one championship and two MVP campaigns under her belt, it would be incorrect to say her time with the Wings hadn’t been fruitful but she’d never felt quite at home here. And that had been before the personnel changes had hit Dallas and suddenly, the team coming off a near perfect season with a trophy in their hand, was struggling to keep themselves in playoff contention. Paige had stuck it out two more seasons after, a testament to her loyal nature and desire to start and finish her career at the same place like many legends had done but ultimately enough had been enough and she’s come to terms with the fact that she’s not meant to be a part of the Wings forever.
“Can’t you try talking to the Sparks again?” she says, hands massaging her temple as she resorts to begging, “it’s fucking L.A. they’ve got to have some money lying around somewhere.”
“Even if they did, you and I both know the Sparks aren’t a good fit basketball wise either. GSV has everything you’re looking for. They need a PG and you need a championship contender who’s offering you a deal like they are. You can’t throw all of that away just because-”, Talia bites her lip, catching herself before she can vocalise out loud the real reason they’re having such a complicated conversation about what should be a simple decision.
Paige swallows uncomfortably, skin prickling with that all too familiar fire that spreads through her veins every time her past brushes a little too close to her present. It would be impossible to keep them from ever colliding, but for almost a decade now, Paige has managed to keep them separate beyond absolute necessity. She’s done the cordial handshakes when the Wings played the Valkyries and given due diligent praise when the media had asked about the competition, but that was it. More than that would have been like willingly walking into a fire with kerosene all over her body. And Paige can’t do that, not when the burn marks from years and years ago, still haven’t healed.
“Team chemistry is important,” Paige says finally, “I might be an on-court fit at GSV but that won’t matter if it’s a disaster off the court.”
Talia sighs and Paige can tell she’s fighting the urge to whack her head against her desk, “it’s been years Paige. You've lived a whole life without each other. The two of you are adults. You’re professionals and you’re two of the best goddamn players in the league. You have the same goal; you want to win. You don’t think you can put that behind you to get you both what you want?”
You've lived a whole life without each other
It’s like a well-aimed arrow that barely breaks skin but shatters something underneath, something buried deep within, something she should have gotten rid of years ago but hasn’t been able to let go of yet. Something that feels a lot like a forever she’d never gotten to live out and an always that had flown out of her reach. And Paige knows nobody lives the life they’d expected to live at fifteen or even eighteen but the truth is that most of her dreams had come true. The only thing missing was the person she’d expected to be there by her side when they did.
“Okay listen,” Talia begins again, “here’s what’s gonna happen.”
“Bossy,” Paige smirks, bracing herself, knowing she’s not about to like the next words out of Talia’s mouth.
“You’re going to go to San Francisco,” the older woman raises a silencing hand the minute Paige tries to protest, “you’re going to meet the front office, you’re going to meet the GM and you’re going to tour their facilities. And if after talking with them and seeing all they have to offer, if it’s still not enough to counter having to play with her, then we can revisit this conversation.”
“Can I say no?” Paige tilts her head with a sigh.
Talia smirks and it’s enough for Paige to let her head finally hit the table, “your flight leaves in two days.”
***
Azzi wakes up to a light weight sprawled over her back and tiny fingers rubbing circles against her temple. She can’t help but smile, keeping her eyes closed and listening to the sound of her daughter’s quiet breathing as the little girl continues her ministrations. It’s a new skill she’s been taught, to wake her mom up like this instead of screaming. So far, Azzi think’s it’s been a successful transition.
“Mama,” Stephie whispers in Azzi’s ear, “are you awake yet cause I really really want waffles.”
Azzi laughs, finally flipping herself over and Stephie squeals as she goes from on top of her mother, to landing on the bed, “I thought you said you wanted pancakes last night?”
“I did,” a thoughtful look crosses the five-year-old's eyes, “I think I changed my mind.”
“You think?” Azzi suppresses a smile. It’s uncanny really how she’d given birth to her perfect mini-me. The moment the nurses had placed the tiny little creature into her waiting hands, she’d noticed immediately how much it felt like looking through a door into her childhood. And with every passing day, it seems Stephie morphs more and more into Azzi. From the way her face betrays her every emotion to the way she can’t make a decision to save her life, it’s all Azzi and really it makes sense, because Stephie is all Azzi’s.
“Yes,” Stephie nods matter-of-factly as she sits up onto her knee and pulls at Azzi’s blanket, “so can you get up and make me waffles now?”
“Oh of course I can, your highness,” Azzi says dramatically, rising off the bed and letting Stephie climb onto her back, “would you like chocolate sauce or maple syrup with that your majesty?”
Stephie groans, burying her face in Azzi’s neck as if her mother has asked her to make the most difficult decision in the world. They settle into their morning routine, Stephie brushing her teeth as Azzi goes through her meticulous skin care regiment, occasionally dabbing little bits of this and that on her daughter’s skin, eliciting soft giggles from the little girl. It’s her favourite sound in the entire world. Azzi’s life isn’t perfect and there’s a million what if’s, one bigger than all of the others, that plague her mind sometimes but then she looks at Stephie, and she knows she wouldn’t change a single decision she’d made. Because they’ve all led to this moment, 9 am on a Friday, making waffle batter as her five-year old sits on the counter-top. It’s not everything but it’s enough.
The frantic sound of a door being haphazardly slammed open has both Stephie and Azzi startled, until Colleen comes bursting through it like a tornado.
“Oh thank god you’re awake,” Azzi’s best friend and manager says, out of breath, as she throws her car keys on the kitchen table.
“Hi Aunty Leen,” Stephie grins, waffle batter all over her mouth as she continues to dip and lick.
“Hey kiddo,” Colleen ruffles Stephie’s hair before sitting down and staring pointedly up at Azzi, “you might wanna sit down for this. I have news.”
“Sorry to break it to you Collen but your new h-o-o-k-u-p-s are not sit-down-newsworthy,” Azzi smirks as Colleen scrunches up her nose trying to keep up with the spelling.
“Oh trust me Az, I wish this was about my h-o-o- whatever,” Colleen takes a deep breath, “GSV is meeting with a potential point guard this week.”
“I would hope so. We really need a PG if we’re gonna redeem ourselves next season.”
“Right, well- you see- the thing is-”
“Today if you can please Colleen,” but there’s this knot forming in the pit of her stomach. Her sixth sense that’s been dormant for years is prickling and if she’s honest with herself, Azzi knows the next words that are about to come out of Colleen’s mouth before her best friend has even said them.
“GSV wants to sign Paige,” Colleen says slowly.
For a moment there’s silence and it’s ridiculous how all it takes is her name for Azzi’s mind to start flipping through pages and pages of a photo album she’s buried deep in the treasure chest of her mind. And for a second, she allows herself to get lost in a flood of everything we could have been until the sting of her hand slipping against the waffle iron jolts her back to reality.
“Fuck,” she curses, immedaitely blowing at her fingers. It does nothing. She should know by now that when things burn, the flames might die out, but even the ashes remain on fire.
“Bad word Mama,” Stephie chides immediately, unaware that her mother’s world has just been thrown off balance, “you owe me a kiss.”
She juts her cheek out and Azzi complies, trying to ignore the way her heart is desperately trying to beat out of her chest. It only calms down a little when Stephie presses a kiss of her own against Azzi’s cheek.
“Sorry sweetheart, mama’s bad, Here can you mix this batter for me,” Azzi whispers to the younger girl, distracting her child with something to do, before rounding on her best friend, “she can’t come here.”
Colleen sighs, getting comfortable in her chair, “unfortunately I don’t think you have much choice.”
“The h-” Azzi cuts herself off, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, “the haystack I don’t. This is my team and I don’t want her on it and I’m gonna walk into Ohemaa’s office and tell her exactly that.”
“Right and what exactly are you going to tell her when she asks you why you don’t want the best point guard in the league on your team Azzi? Your team, who mind you, lost in the finals last year because you didn’t have a point guard.”
Azzi flinches, gritting her teeth, both at the reminder of the loss that had happened not long enough ago and the fact that she couldn’t very well go into her boss’s office and blurt out the truth about a tragic relationship that had lived and died in secret.
“It's a bad idea, the two of us- we’ll kill each other Colleen,” she struggles to string the words together, swallowing away the we already have that tastes like bile on the tip of her tongue.
“Well you’re gonna have to learn not to,” Colleen says decisively, slipping from being Azzi’s best friend to her manager, “because you and I both know that if you want GSV to win another championship, you’re going to need her.”
“Are you my manager or GSV’s,” Azzi grunts, rubbing a tired hand against her forehead.
Colleen smiles, “it’s the same thing isn’t it? What’s good for GSV is good for you. And we all know the two of you thrive on the court together.”
“We did. Past tense,” the admission falls like lava from Azzi’s lips, singeing the edges of her mouth as everything that she’d let simmer underneath threatens to bubble over, “there’s no guarantee we still will. Besides, it's all a moot point anyways because she would never agree.”
“Wouldn’t she?” Colleen cocks an eyebrow and Azzi groans at the rhetorical question, waiting for the inevitable other shoe to drop, “because last I checked, she’s flying into San Francisco tomorrow.”
***
Paige has a problem. A really big fuck i really want to be a golden state valkyrie type of problem. She’d fought it every step of the way since she’d landed in San Francisco. Something about the city felt like it was bursting with basketball. The drive from the airport into Oakland had been bursting with murals of the Warriors and the Valkyries and for a split second, Paige can see her own face up on the billboards in a #5 Valkyries jersey. She just doesn’t know if it she can imagine herself next to the woman in #35 again, the woman whose smile in the posters is exactly as she remembers it to have been like when it was pressed into Paige’s skin every night almost a decade ago.
On top of that, Omehaa Nyanin had seemed to know exactly what made Paige Bueckers, the basketball player, tick. Every argument Paige had about why she shouldn’t be Valkyrie, the woman had a counter ready, as if she’d already anticipated exactly what the blonde would say. The Valkyrie coach had been even more prepared with videos of their offensive and defensive sets and how they fit in tandem with Paige’s own skill set, all ready to show off the minute she had walked through the door. It should be the easiest decision in the world to let herself just belong to this world that is screaming her name but there’s a rope around her waist trying to tug her back to safety, trying to tug her away from dousing her still-open wounds in salt.
Sighing, Paige lets herself into what she’s been told is called the “chill area”. Coach had offered to give her a tour of the facilities herself but Paige had declined, asking instead for her former UConn teammate and currently Valkyrie centre Jana El Alfy to do the honours, desperate for a familiar face who knew her history to bounce her thoughts off. It clearly wasn’t what the woman had wanted, but considering she was trying to convince Paige to choose them, whatever the blonde wanted, she was going to get. Massaging her temples at this irritating predicament she’s unwillingly found herself in, Paige’s head rolls back against the back of the chair, eyes closing involuntarily.
“You’re not supposed to sleep in here,” a tiny voice echoes and Paige almost jumps out her skin in shock.
“Fucking hell,” she curses as her eyes fall upon a little girl who seems to have materialized out of nowhere, “shit kid, you scared me.”
The child scrunches her nose and Paige feels her heart beat start to quicken as recognition settles in. She knows this little girl, has seen her on the sidelines at countless games and just like every other time, all she can think of is just how much this child resembles the future Paige had once believed would be hers.
“You owe me three kisses,” the girl says matter-of-factly, her tone so similar to her mothers. It shouldn’t surprise Paige, not when the kid has those same dark curls, those same doey brown eyes, that same nose scrunch.
“I owe you three kisses?” Paige repeats.
The girl rolls her eyes letting out a sigh far too grave for someone of her age, “yes. Mama says whenever someone says a bad word around me, they have to give me a kiss. You said three bad words, so you owe me three kisses.”
“And what does Mama say about asking strangers for kisses?”
“Stranger danger duh silly,” the child puts her hands on her hips, tilting her head as she looks at Paige with a far too familiar expression, “but you’re not a stranger.”
Paige purses her lips, “I’m not?”
“You’re Paige Bueckers. I’ve seen you at Mama’s games and Nanna and Pops have pictures of you in their house,” she stops, staring accusingly, “you don’t know who I am? Did you forget me?”
And Paige doesn’t know what catches her off guard more. The casual mention of a house that used to feel like a home, of people that used to feel like family or the fact that, that puppy dog stare still has the exact same effect on her that it did years ago, even if the owner of said eyes is different.
“Of course I didn’t forget you. You’re Stephanie,” Paige says softly, trying to muster a smile as she adds the last name, “Stephanie Fudd.”
“Stephanie Katarina Fudd,” comes the immediate correction, “but everybody calls me Stephie,” tiny hands wrap around Paige’s neck as Stephie climbs on to her lap, tapping a finger on her left cheek as she smiles up at Paige, “so now can I have my kisses?”
Slowly, Paige presses three featherlight kisses against the little girl’s cheek and when Stephie squeals in delight, she wishes she could record it. Someone somewhere is playing a practical joke on her, Paige is sure of it. Because all of a sudden, all the little things she’s been collecting as to reasons why she might just like the Bay Area are starting to feel insignificant in front of this one, in front of Stephie and her innocent smile and the way her free hand is curled around Paige’s neck as if she’ll hold on forever. And the world is definitely playing a cruel prank on her because Stephie can’t be the reason Paige wants to stay, not when her mother’s the reason Paige needs to go.
“Your Mama just lets you run around the building like this?” Paige asks, trying to focus on Stephie instead of the turmoil in her brain.
Stephie smiles sheepishly, “well I was ‘posed to stay with Aunty Leen while Mama talks to Miss O but then Aunty Leen got a call and I was bored so I came here.”
It doesn’t take Paige too long to decipher that Miss O must be Omehaa, but she’s stuck on who the hell Aunty Leen could be. She’s distinctly aware that her skin has no right to prickle, her hands have no right to sweat, her stomach has no right to knot, she has no right to feel anything when it comes to Stephie’s mother. But jealousy floods through her anyways.
“Who is Aunty Leen?” Paige asks and then mentally slaps herself for it.
“Aunty Leen is Aunty Leen,” Stephie explains unhelpfully, “so Miss Buecks-”
“Bueckers.”
Stephie shoots her an unimpressed look, “same things Miss Buecks. Are you here to join Mama’s team?”
“I-” Paige scratches her neck, only slightly taken aback by the direct question, “I don’t know.”
“You should,” Stephies says decisively, “Mama’s team is the best team in the world and Mama’s the best player in the whole wide world.”
Paige can’t help but smile at Stephie’s loyalty, “so why does her team need me then?”
Stephie looks contemplative for a moment before she uses her index finger to beckon Paige towards her, “can I tell you a secret?”
“Of course you can,” Paige says, leaning her ear down so Stephie can whisper into it.
“Don’t tell anyone but you’re my second favourite player.”
Paige swears her heart feels like it might burst. She’s been plenty of people’s favourite player and it’s always been nice to hear. But somehow, all of that seems to pale in comparison to being Stephie’s second favourite player.
“Why’s that a secret?” she asks softly.
“Cause you play for the wrong team silly. I can’t cheer for not Mama’s team,” Stephie huffs and then her eyes twinkle, “that’s why you should play for Mama’s team and then I can support you!”
“Can’t argue with that logic,” Paige concedes, battling against the part of her brain that’s conjuring up an image of Stephie on the sidelines, cheering for Paige.
“What’s log-ic?” Stephie asks.
“Just means you’re a really smart kid,” Paige says, tapping the little girl’s nose. Her head is ringing with warning bells because this floaty feeling of belonging that’s encompassed in this little bubble she’s found herself in with Stephie is not one she’s allowed to feel, not now, not ever.
“STEPHIE,” a shrill voice echoes outside and Stephie immediately dives into Paige’s neck, hiding herself in the crook of it as a frazzled woman bursts through the door. Her eyes soften when they fall on Paige and the blonde can’t help the caught expression that filters on her face. She knows she’s done nothing wrong; Stephie had been the one to find her after all. But perhaps it’s because she’s scared Colleen will take one look at her and see that tiny rebellious part of her that wants to fight what’s coming next, wants to fight the woman who’s going to take Stephie away from her. Paige isn’t one to get attached easily. It had only ever happened once before when she was fifteen and she’d just known that the girl shooting three’s next to her on the court was meant to be in her life in one way or another. But things had been simple then. Nothing was simple now.
“Stephie,” Colleen says slowly, “what have I told you about running away from me?”
Stephie peeks her head out from Paige’s chest, a coy smirk playing on her lips, “not to do it? But you were boring me Aunty Leen.”
Oh that’s Aunty Leen, Paige thinks and she absolutely should not let out a sigh of relief at that but she does anyway.
“I was on the phone for two minutes, Steph.”
“Two minutes too long,” Stephie counters and Paige has to stifle a laugh.
Colleen rolls her eyes before holding out a hand, “well your Mama’s nearly done so we have to get going kiddo.”
“Can Miss Buecks come with us?” Stephie asks innocently and both Colleen and Paige freeze.
“I don’t think-”
“I’m not sure-”
They both begin before their eyes flicker to each other and they can’t help but smile. It’s funny how relationships work, how one snapped string can cause a whole web to dissolve, no matter how hard everyone involved had tried to make it work.
“I’m waiting to meet someone sweetheart so I can’t come right now,” Paige explains, “but maybe next time?”
And she shouldn’t add that last part, not when Paige should be devising an escape plan to never be in Oakland again instead of giving Stephie false hope about a next time that’s far from guaranteed. But it’s worth it for the way Stephie grins, staring at Paige like she’s given her the world’s greatest gift.
Before Paige can say anything, the little girl presses her lips against Paige’s cheek and she swears she stops breathing for a moment, “I hope you choose to play for Mama’s team Miss Buecks. I think you’d look pretty in purple.”
***
May 2024
“I’ve figured it out,” Paige says triumphantly as she unceremoniously flops onto Azzi’s bed.
“Well hi to you too babe,” Azzi grumbles as she scoots over to give the other girl space. It’s unnecessary because the minute she does, Paige only moves closer, wrapping an arm around Azzi’s torso.
“Hi baby,” she whispers before pressing a kiss against her girlfriend’s lips and pulling away so quickly that it leaves Azzi chasing after her.
Azzi huffs and Paige laughs as she gets herself comfortable, resting her chest on the darker skinned girl's stomach, “I’ve figured it out.”
“Figured what out?”
“Our future,” Paige says triumphantly and Azzi can’t help but smile at the our as she intertwines their fingers together. It’s been years in the making and there’s nothing Azzi’s more confident in than those two words. Not everyone finds forever this young, but she’s certain they have because really she can’t imagine a life where they don’t belong to each other, a life where every night isn’t spent exactly like this.
“And what do you see for our future,” Azzi asks softly.
“Well it’s simple really,” Paige hums, “I’m going to get drafted wherever next year but the year after, you’re definitely getting drafted to Valkyries-”
“I don’t know about definitely-”
“Azzi it’s rude to interrupt,” Paige sends her a chastising look.
“Right of course,” Azzi nods solemnly, “continue.”
“As I was saying. You’re definitely getting drafted to the Valks and then we just have to wait for my rookie contract to be up and boom! I’ll join you in the Bay Area and we’ll be together forever and ever and ever.”
Azzi giggles, brushing her hands through Paige’s hair, “that simple huh?”
“That simple,” Paige promises, catching hold of one of Azzi’s hands to press a kiss to her palm, “it’s us Az, we’ll always be simple. Besides, I think we’d both look pretty good in purple.”
***
May 2033
The Valkyrie facilities are state of the art as expected. Jana is the perfect tour guide, pointing out everything she knows will garner Paige’s attention. As they step foot onto the practice court, Paige feels the overwhelming sense of this could be home that’s been dancing along with her every step of the way today. All the resolve she’d carried with her from Dallas is slowly crashing down and she can practically hear Talia’s sing-song i told you so voice echoing in her head.
“You’d be really good here P,” Jana says excitedly, doing a little spin.
“You’d be lucky to have me,” Paige teases, as she picks up a basketball and subconsciously starts dribbling.
Jana laughs, before a serious expression takes over, “we would. We got really close to winning it all last year and I think you might be our missing piece.”
“I want to,” Paige confesses, “I just-” her eyes flicker to the most recent MVP poster hanging on the walls, Jana’s gaze following hers, “I don’t know if I should. It’s so complicated.”
“Only if you let it be,” Jana says as she swipes the ball out Paige’s hands, “don’t think of everything else P, just- just think of the basketball. Because you know basketball-wise, this is the right move,” she passes the ball to Paige with a smirk, tilting her head towards the basket, “why not take a shot at it P?”
Paige shakes her head, palming the ball in her hands, “can’t believe my son’s all grown up.”
“Children of divorce have no choice but to grow up,” Jana says gravely and Paige laughs despite herself.
Taking a deep breath, Paige raises the ball, arching her arms perfect as she shoots it. It barely touches the rim, before falling through the basket with swish. Hitting the floor with a quiet thud, the ball rolls until it’s stopped by someone's foot. Behind her, Paige can hear Jana cheering for the shot but she barely registers it, her entire attention on the new figure who’s just entered the court. It’s a tale as old as time. Azzi Fudd enters the room and suddenly everything else in Paige’s peripheral fades away, until it’s just her and the girl who still manages to steal her breath away.
“Nice shot,” Azzi says, as she takes a slow step towards Paige. The air is thick with tension as if a time capsule has been opened and their past is leaking onto the pages of their present, staining it with marks of the you and me that we used to be. She should say something, even if it’s just an acknowledgement of the compliment but her tongue feels dry and she’s scared that if she opens her mouth, all the things she shouldn’t say will flood out instead.
“Hey Az,” Jana’s eyes flicker awkwardly between her former teammates, “I didn’t know you were coming in today.”
“Had to talk to Omehaa about a couple of things,” Azzi says airly, eyes still fixated on Paige, “Jana can we have a minute?”
“You won’t kill each other will you?” Jana asks nervously.
Azzi laughs and even Paige cracks a small smile, “no Jana, we won’t kill each other.”
“Just making sure because last time-” Jana clamps a hand to her mouth as both Paige and Azzi flinch, “because nothing- you guys- you guys talk. I’ll give you guys a minute.”
She scampers away cursing to herself about putting her foot in her mouth and it would be amusing, if not for the fact that Paige can still barely breathe. They haven’t been alone in a room since last time and the air around them hangs heavy with the casings of the grenades they’d hurled at each other.
“I’ve never seen you with braids this early in the year. They used to be your summer braids,” Paige remarks slowly. It’s a mundane change to notice but it’s significant of the larger truth, significant of all the time that’s passed, significant of the fact they don’t know these new versions of each other.
“Yeah um, can’t really do summer braids with the W season,” Azzi chews at her lip.
“Right yeah- yeah that makes sense,” Paige nods. The awkwardness is killing her. She’d never been a fan of the silence, always more comfortable in the chaos but it had been different with Azzi. There had been something peaceful, something calming, about the quiet, when it was just the two of them, hands intertwined, eyes closed, as they listened to the sound of each other’s heartbeat.
“Paige-”
“Are you here to tell me not to come to GSV?” Paige blurts out, “because it’s- it’s okay if you are like I get it. I mean- the two of us- it’s just really fucking complicated so I get it- I get it if you don’t want me here.”
“I didn’t,” Azzi admits and it shouldn’t, but Paige feels it sting anyways, “you’re right. You and I- there’s just a lot there and it would- it would be really complicated and when Colleen first told me I- I was gonna go fight Omehaa and be like abso-fucking-lutely not but-” she sucks in a deep breath, “do you remember the promise we made to each other?”
“We made a lot of promises to each other,” Paige says, unable to keep the harshness out of her tone, “sorry I-”
“No you’re right,” Azzi swallows, “but I meant the promise we made when we first started dating. We said we’d never let the personal affect the professional. We promised each other that no matter what, we’d never let our relationship affect us on the court And I know- I know we’ve broken a lot of promises to each other,” they both let out a breath at that, “but I think- I think maybe we should try and keep this one.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying you need a championship contender and GSV needs a PG. Paige, I’m not here to convince you to not come to GSV, I’m here to ask you to join our team,” Azzi says resolutely.
Paige isn’t easily shocked by anything really. She’s lived what she’d consider a pretty interesting life but of course if anyone was going to surprise her, it would be Azzi. Azzi, who has always been an exception to every rule.
“You- you want me on your team?” Paige repeats, a little dumbfounded.
“Yes,” Azzi affirms, “you told me once that we could be the best backcourt duo in college basketball and we were, even if it was only for a year, we were and so now I’m telling you that I think we could be the best backcourt duo in the WNBA.”
Paige is silent for a second before a smirk takes over her features, “I think I did a lot more than tell you, pretty sure I had a whole video that proved it.”
“Are you asking me to make you a recruiting video?” Azzi raises an unamused eyebrow.
Paige shrugs, “could be a nice gesture.”
“I have a five year old child, Bueckers. Trust me when I say I don’t have enough spare time for bullshit like that when you can easily just search up our highlights on youtube. Or just look in your trophy case if you’re looking for proof of how good we can be together,” Azzi says, a hint of that familiar sass bleeding into her spiel.
“We really were good together weren’t we,” it spills out before Paige can stop it and it’s like they’re taking two steps back from each other, the friendly-ish banter of mere seconds ago being clouded by a past tainted by their mistakes, “on the court I mean. We were really good on the court.”
“Right,” Azzi averts her gaze, “just- just think about it okay? This doesn’t- it doesn’t have to be about you and me, not like that at least. It’s about basketball. GSV is the perfect fit for you and you’re the perfect fit for us. And deep down you must know that too, otherwise you wouldn’t be here.”
“Maybe I’m just in it for the free trip to Cali,” Paige surmises.
Azzi scoffs, “you and I both know you make too much money to need a free trip to Cali. If anything, the hotel they’ve given you is probably cheap for your standards.”
“Maybe I just like feeling important? I always did love people showering me with praise.”
“You always did love the attention,” Azzi grins teasingly, “but there’s one thing you always loved more.”
You, Paige thinks but she can’t say that, “and what’s that?”
“Winning. That’s what this is about. You want another championship, so do we. Come help us and let us help you. It’s that simple.”
As Azzi turns to walk away, Paige can’t help but call out from behind her, “you know I think your daughter’s pitch might have been better.”
There’s a smile playing on Azzi’s lips when she turns her face back a little. It’s a new smile that Paige can only assume is Azzi’s Stephie smile, “yeah? What did she say?”
“She told me she thinks I’d look good in purple,” Paige smirks.
Azzi laughs, and it’s exactly like Paige remembers, “it’s that simple huh?”
“It’s that simple.”
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Glenn is right: it is objectively funnier if Mac and Dennis never acknowledge what they are to each other, of course it is.
The humour in Macdennis moments lies in the fact that they have no idea how gay they are for each other, because that’s where Macdennis was born.
Season 5 has these extremely homoerotic moments that follow the insane idea that they should be a fake gay couple because they want to swim in a pool, which results in Dennis breaking them up because of how serious it becomes when it’s acknowledged what they are to each other.
The following 11 Seasons of Macdennis plays with their relationship in a continued, yet often unacknowledged, homoerotic or sexual way, switching between one or both of them failing to realise it’s pretty gay and thus, making it funny.
They’ve been roommates for 25 years. Dennis financially supported Mac the whole time they lived there through S9, at least. They lose their apartment, they both live at Dee’s, they don’t like living at Dee’s, they go rent a house in the Suburbs to play husband and wife. Back in their apartment, they get rid of all their furniture and so now they share a bed. Now they share finances, it’s not just Dennis’, but “our nut,” roommates with a joint bank account. They somehow share doctor’s appointments.
They watch each other have sex, they watch sex together, they spy on each other having sex, they train each other in sexual practices, they practice seducing each other, they attempt to seduce each other, they repeatedly establish their places of dominance, they give each other orgasms, via the prostate, or internal, of course.
They’re incredibly codependent and they’re both getting off.
The fact that they fail to address that it’s reciprocally gay, that there’s some label to be assigned to their relationship far beyond ‘roommates’ is funny. “I sleep with women but I’m emotionally involved with Mac.” It’s funny that only when they lie for the scheme are they really telling the truth.
It’s happening, it will continue to happen, and they won’t define it because why would they? Move Past It, it’s one of their best jokes.
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