#robert mentions
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I need them to do a reboot of House but I want them to just go fucking wild with it. Everyone's gay, everyone's fucking. House, Wilson, and Cuddy are in a toxic polycule, one that definitely violates work ethics, that ends when Cuddy cheats on them with Cameron. I want it to be just as homophobic, just as ableist, just as fucked up, as the original and yet have the characters all be so fucking woke. Same episodes with the same plots but modern. I want Chase to have an onlyfans.
#shitpost#house md#malpractice md#gregory house#hate crimes md#robert chase#james wilson#lisa cuddy#hilson#idk if theirs a ship name for them#but house x wilson x cuddy#allison cameron#i didn't mention foreman#but hes there#he falls in love with Chase after accidentally finding his OF#thirteen uses Tumblr#like she has a Tumblr accent#and house definitely knows what Tumblr is#and definitely notices
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house md will always be remebered as the most insane thing ever broadcast because of how unabashedly feral everyone involved was.
a short collection of things that happen on the show, just off the top of my head, not even scratching the surface:
- house shoots a random dead body in the morgue and then sticks him in an mri machine, which pulls the bullet out of the dead guy’s head and destroys the machine, costing the hospital millions
- foreman gets bitten by a person with rabies
- chase kills an african dictator
- cameron steals drugs from a patient after possibly getting hiv from said patient
- house induces a migraine and then takes a drug made by his arch nemesis (who he’s been stalking for 25 years) to get the drug taken off the market. he then takes lsd (in the hospital, in the middle of a case) to cure the migraine.
- chase goes into anaphylaxis after doing body shots
- house stops an elevator so he can perform a cavity (vaginal) search on a teenage heart transplant patient who’s in cardiorespiratory arrest
- they give a neurosurgeon mushrooms to cure his food poisoning, then they stick him in an operating room. the neurosurgeon strips in front of a health board assessor.
- kutner dies for gay marriage
- house sets an autopsy room on fire while trying to juggle flaming bottles
- house gets recruited by the cia
- taub gets held at gun point after diagnosing a stripper with skin cancer
- in almost every single episode, the team breaks into multiple houses
- house fakes terminal brain cancer so he can get drugs implanted directly into the pleasure centre of his brain
- house cons us immigration to get his fake wife a green card. he also uses his fake wife’s ukrainian food truck to spy on people
- house tries to get wilson, his closet case boybestfriend, into bed every few episodes. every other sentence out of house’s mouth is about wanting to rail wilson.
- taub has a kid with his ex-wife, after they divorce, at the same time he has a kid with his 25 yo side piece. the kids’ names are sophie and sophia.
- house and wilson have a bet on who can hide a chicken in the hospital the longest without anyone finding out
- house tries to kill himself like 6 times and always fails (insulin shock, overdoses, electrocution, jumping off a building, cutting, etc)
- house fakes his death to get out of a prison sentence after violating his parole so he can live out his bi love story with his gay best friend who has 5 months to live
#if people think r/okbuddyvicodin is insane they should see the source material#hate crimes md#hilson#hugh laurie#rsl#robert sean leonard#house md#gregory house#james wilson#hugh laurie biggest hilson shipper fr#rsl biggest hilson hater#r/okbuddyvicodin#tw sui attempt#tw self h4rm#tw self harm#tw self harm mention#dead poets society#dps#yes robert sean leonard aka neil perry from dead poets society is the second main character in this show#starlightseraph’s brainrot
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I’m not going to do one of those “REBLOG OR YOU’RE A HORRIBLE PERSON!!!!!!1!” posts, but please, if you have the time, read about Robert Roberson.
Neurodivergent people, we especially need to pay attention to this. This is a man who was sent to death row because he appeared too “stoic”. He was formally diagnosed with autism after. I’m sure you already know that this is only one part of a larger pattern of flaws. Fellow victims of the US’ crap legal system, we need to say something. I don’t care if you think it won’t work, we still have to give them hell. They may have power, but they need to know damn well we won’t sit by and let people die.
Greg Abbott’s number (yes, of course it’s Texas) is 361-264-9653. Give him a call if you have the time. If calls freak you out, text. If you don’t want to do that, sign the petition. You have the chance to change history right now.
Most importantly, take care of yourself. All this tragedy drains the soul, especially when it hits close to home. After you’re done with this post, drink some water and watch something nice or, better yet, step away from the screen for a bit. You deserve it and more.
#robert roberson#anti death penalty#autism#neurodivergent#tw wrongful imprisonment#tw death mention#i know this is so different from what i usually post but i find it important#it’s rare that i’m tempted to speak out about things but this just makes me feel so infuriated
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Started a new book series, and has been a journey...an Odyssey, if you will.
#poorly drawn odyssey#the odyssey#Athena#telemachus#penelope#odysseus#calypso#I also drew Phemius the bard and Antinous the leader of the suitors but I'll hold onto those for a while longer.#The Odyssey has been on my reading list for ages and I finally decided to just dive into the Robert Fagles translation.#*nobody* ever talks about how damn funny the Odyssey is. Oh my god. I have been howling.#The poor bard doomed to keep playing for this unending feast. The most unwilling court jester.#Penelope being introduced by her crying about how much she 'hates this song'.#And Telemachus is the goodest lad. The OG protag to set about on his heroes journey.#He is kind! He is soft! He yearns for adventure and finding out the truth! He wants to get back at his bullies!#He even gets a companion named Mentor. THE original mentor! Who is *totally* not a god by the way. Just a guy.#Not to mention how much Odysseus gets hyped up only for his first appearance to be him sobbing non-stop.#Honestly I was mostly motivated by the need to do research for a personal project but I've been having the best time.#I sincerely doubt my current audience has any overlap with classic Greek literature but expect a few more PD-Odyssey posts.#(Yes - I am familiar with Epic the Musical; this is not fanart of that adaptation).
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"Ooh, are you guys watching The God Father?"
Barbie (2023) dir. Greta Gerwig
#barbie 2023#movieedit#filmgifs#userstream#cinemapix#dailyflicks#cinematv#barbieedit#filmedit#userkimb#usersakshi#usernaureen#userchibi#usersunflower#underbetelgeuse#userhallie#tusernath#userraffa#my edit#edit: lines#ROBERT EVANS MENTION!!!#issa's delivery of 'the god father' is like my favorite thing in the whole movie#1k
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man. you have to fuck up a waterslide so bad to decapitate a kid. you hear a rollercoaster decapitated a kid and you're like, yeah, that makes sense. that feels like a thing that can happen. but a waterslide? that feels like you must have built a saw trap on purpose.
#original#on behind the bastards i think? they were talking about that water park#and someone (robert?) said they always think of the theme song when the park is mentioned#and i said out loud with my mouth in the car 'i think about that waterslide that killed a kid'
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hugh laurie & robert sean leonard "gear up for the end"
#watch the whole interview oh my god#rsl is just wilson fr#house md#hate crimes md#hatecrimes md#interviews#robert sean leonard#hugh laurie#what is up with you#olivia wilde mention#james wilson#gregory house#housemdedit#anna attempts photoshop
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dr. robert chase x reader - the chase itself (smut)
hi guys :D i know i haven't posted in a while, but i recently asked a VERY good friend of mine to cook me a fanfic of this very beautiful man, and HE DELIVERED. like all out jaws on the floor type delivered. i love this man fr, so i'm posting it here with his permission. it's his first fanfic ever, and in my humble professional opinion he overdelivered - so have fun reading this beautiful smut fic of reader and dr. chase <3
I. Humble Beginnings
Taking place in Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, New Jersey, you are a fairly new nurse who pursued a medical career in quite a common way. The way being that it was more so your parents’ wish for you to go to medical school than your own, but you don’t necessarily hate that fact; at least it gave you a direction, so to speak.
It’s early in the morning, so there’s not a whole lot going on. You went around doing your usual checkups already and what not, therefore you decide to go on your well deserved coffee break. However, right as you are are on that, and you step out of the cubicle you are in, you glance over to an unfamiliar face through an operating room.
Some would call it love at first sight, but it really is more than that. It’s the kind of tingly sensation no one could forget. It’s almost shameful, but you can’t be bothered by that feeling right now. As if you physically couldn’t take your eyes off of them, you lose all sense of purpose, standing there, unable to think. Suddenly, someone bumps into you, which wakes you up from your total amusement. You feel the need to know more, so as you squint your eyes, you can read their name off of the shirt they are wearing.
“Dr. Robert Chase..? I need to.. have a talk with him. I just need to.” – you think to yourself, ponderingly.
You go back to working with a saturated mind, unable to concentrate.
II. The Chase Itself
As days go by, you’re quite hesitant to reach out to him, but you seriously feel the need to. Why is that, really, you ask yourself. You ache to even have a talk with him at this point, but you long for more. Way more. You can’t think of anything else.
After contemplating for a good while, you decide to ask around to know what time he gets off from work, since you want to surprise him at the last minute. That’s the only way you see that you could have a one-on-one with him anytime soon.
With that out the way, you now know everything you needed to know. The only thing that divides you from your desire is to actually act up on it, so you gather all your courage. You look at the time, and you’re actually pretty shocked how caught up you were thinking about him. If you don’t hurry then you’re going to miss him that day entirely, so you start sprinting.
You notice him as he is turning around the corner, all dressed up, ready to leave, and you stumble right into him.
“I need to tell you something inside, it’s.. it’s important, alright. And it might just take a while” – you tell him, struggling with your words. “Great. I was just about to leave, you know. Whatever, show me, I don’t have much time for this. Is it really that important?” – he answers abruptly, being quite impatient.
You suddenly catch a rush of excitement. This is all that you were planning for the past few days or so, to get close to him, and it looks like you’re on track.
III. An Uneasy Start
Chase swings open the door of the office he’s just been in, ushering you in and closing the door behind him, since there’s quite the commotion even late into the night, it’s a hospital after all. It’s dark inside, the only light sources being a dim lamp he accidentally left on and the Moon seeping through the closed blinds faintly. The room has a surgical bed, a cabinet behind it with all kinds of training supplies, a desk with an office chair and a hanger stand. He puts his white coat on the stand, then undoes his tie, putting it into his pants pocket in a really apathetic way, with most of it hanging out.
Seemingly being quite contempt with the situation, he sits down onto the office chair, facing you, and he seriously doesn’t look like he wants to be there.
As a last effort at trying to ease up the situation, you grab the glass of water that is sitting on the desk and you splash it at him, in a playful way. Not surprisingly, this backfires, since he doesn’t seem too happy about, not in the slightest. He stands up from his desk and goes on to wipe off his shirt to make it slightly less messy, all without even muttering a word. You do feel pretty stupid for that.
With another attempt at getting his attention, you arousingly start to cut the strings off of a few upper buttons on your blouse with a surgical knife, as he turns back to you, giving him a snarky look.
“Was that really necessary? What was so important about any of this? Can we get to the damn point?” – he asks you with a loss of temper. “I might have lied about that important thing.” – you answer him not so bravely.
He's visibly frustrated at you, and with a change of demeanor, he stands up and is now closing distance between you in a rush, as you are backing up. He halts as he catches up to you, towering over you.
With both hands on your shoulders, clenching them hard, he asks you, in an almost belittling tone: “Is this what you wanted? “ “I don’t know, is it?” – you answer him in a pretty similar way.
Like the kind of tease you tend to be, you start gliding around your fingertip on his chest, which he.. seems to enjoy, and lets you do for a short while, for then to push you to the nearest wall.
IV. Lust
Fueled by lust, you immediately grab his chin and assertively start kissing him, which absolutely catches him off-guard. In reaction to the advancement on him, he forces your body onto his as he caresses your back. After this goes on for a bit, he grabs you by the thighs, lifts you up and tosses you onto the surgical table.
With your arms behind you, you’re sitting halfway up as your legs are pulled up. You lock eyes while he is still holding you by your thighs. He leans over, drags you closer and is now standing between your legs.
You clumsily unbutton Robert’s shirt, one by one. In contrast, he carelessly tears off a few more of your buttons, making the blouse slide off your shoulders, which then falls onto your lap, flustering you in the process.
He then puts a hand on your lower abdomen, which feels surprisingly soft, even though his hands are quite firm. Most notably, it’s warm. So warm in fact, you feel like you could melt into him, and you are all about that feeling. Starting from your thighs, continuing to your hips, he brushes his both his hands across all the way up to your chest in a painstakingly soft and throughout way, but at the same it’s quite the calm moment.
An intrigued nervousness starts to pile in you as he suddenly starts to unbuckle his belt, which was undoubtedly the loudest noise in the room so far. In the meantime, like the obedient girl you feel like you are, with each rattle, you can't wait to obey. As if you were a household maid, you’re more than ready to satisfy the head of the house, as if he shook a bell around.
He tosses aside his pants and boxers and you feel like you can’t catch up with your heavy heartbeats as he rests his rigid cock on your stomach. It all just feels so sudden, and it’s starting to grow on you in a pleasurable way. He goes onto removing your bra, while you’re simultaneously stroking him slowly and briefly, before he goes down on you again.
You can feel it throb against you, and it’s just as, if not hotter than his hand is, which he has below your stomach again. He needily grinds against you over and over, lifting your skirt up with it every time, and rubbing against your inner thighs.
He doesn’t wait around before removing your panties, which are drenched by this point, and neither does he wait to penetrate you, as he is inside you now.
“Maybe I did need this.. “ - you hear him talk out loud quietly.
At once, as he is slowly, but forcefully thrusting into you, you see him pulling out the tie out his pocket, which he puts around your neck now, instead of his own.
It’s tightened real well, and he’s gripping it by the base, close to your neck. In the meantime he’s constantly pulling on it upwards, as it’s digging into the back of your neck, scraping your chin against it’s band, making your head tilt backwards considerably. With every moan you make, he tightens more on it, leaving your neck all bruised up. As he is fucking you, you’re nails deep in the sheets. You can’t help yourself but feel pleasured.
As he’s starting to get rougher on you, you begin to develop second thoughts and try to resist him, but as you’re doing that, he immediately tugs you closer, rendering your attempt futile. As you look at him, he seems to be way too into this, as his eyes lose all focus and glare, and you can only watch as his control over himself fades, railing you without a care in the world. This creates even more neediness in you, as you cross your legs behind his back, clinging onto him.
You can barely even keep your eyes on him, and you’re not even resisting his pull on your neck anymore, so you fully commit into tilting you head back in joy. All this sexual fulfillment demands you to do so, as you are slipping out of control more by the second. You feel like you could finish at any time, and as he’s also getting close, he’s painfully grazing your stiff walls more and more, with your moans sounding pitifully more helpless.
Ejaculating with a quiet grunt, he blasts the majority into you, leaving two strings across all the way up your body, all for you to feel ecstatic about. You really do feel like you owned up to it with your services, as if it was his way of rewarding you. Not to forget about you, he pushes you over the edge too, as you’re desperately gripping his shoulders. No matter you could barely take a break after your climax, he leans closer over your stimulation filled shivering body, and goes for a deep passionate kiss. Not even bothered by the fact you are still desperately panting and gasping for air along with him.
V. Not So Aftercare
After standing up from the bed, he comfortably hugs you by your hips, to which you endearingly put your hands onto his. After romantically rocking you slightly around with his hug, he leaves his hands off of you to start dressing up. It’s getting quite late.
As he is about to button back his shirt, he looks at you still standing there, still looking a bit shocked from everything that happened so far. Deciding to help out, he steps besides you, getting your bra back from your bed, and putting it on you. He’s slowly buckling the back together, and you are simply just unable to look him in the eyes, since you're becoming increasingly shy in a sudden way, blushing like you never have before.
"You.. didn't have to, you know.." - you tell him in a higher pitch voice.
You really enjoy his care, it does fill you with joy. Then you reach out for your panties, but as you are pulling them up, he slides his hands under yours, taking the lead again, which surprises you even more. You are so overwhelmed with emotions at this point, you shake right into his hand as he pulls it all the way up, giving you a slight friendly chuckle, and blowing you a kiss right above the lining of your briefs, gaining him an immediate gasp from you. You're truly mesmerized by him.
He continues dressing himself, and as you calm down, you rush into his arms, facing his chest. He caresses and pets your face and head with one arm, for him to go onto groping your ass, and going down to your thighs. His hand lifts your skirt away from time to time, letting colder air in. After he finishes clothing up, he swings you to his other side and pushes you right to the desk.
“I need more of you. I need to feel you in more ways.” – he tells you with a shaky voice.
You almost even stumble, and with an utterly scared look on your face, you glance at him. Without precaution, he pushes you down onto the floor. You look down onto your legs. Your knees are together and your feet are far apart, completely side-tracking you. You even put your hands on your knees in a cute way, but as you lift your head, his cock gets into view, poking through his pants fly, which takes you aback.
Your first and immediate reaction is to press your lips all around him, kissing and licking his shaft as it pumps against your mouth. After growing tired and wanting more, he puts his thumb in your mouth, and with a few fingers latching onto your chin, he pushes downwards on your jaw. With closed eyes, you stick out your tongue, waiting for him to enter. He lets go off of his fingers from your face, following up with exactly what you expected. It feels way bigger than what you anticipated, leaving your mouth sore in the first minute, already. He’s being frantic with you, mouth fucking you without relent. You’re huffing for air as you whimper, but you aren’t getting any. You start to sob as he goes deeper down your throat. As you move your tongue in a swing like motion, from side to side, you circle the bottom of his shaft as he shoves himself in an out. You soak his cock with your saliva, blending with his precum. No matter how much of it you gulp down, It’s flowing out your mouth.
Resting his elbows and head above you on the desk, he looks down at the top of your head, as you suck him off. From the table, as he rocks you around, all kinds of documents fly off. Not that he cares, really.
Without even telling, he comes into your mouth, throbbing against your lips. You stomach it all as you look up to him, initiating eye contact, and smiling. After spewing out his cock, you grab it by the base and gently rub it off with a napkin. He pulls his zipper up, and kneels down. He parts your hair slightly and greets your forehead with a last smooch.
Looking back at you for the final time, he waves at you, winks in a mocking, yet sweet way and leaves though the door. You can only wish to meet soon in a similar fashion.
VI. Reflection
You’re at a loss of thoughts. He’s been so careful, yet so careless with you at the same time, and that’s just messing with your brain right now, so you lean your head against the desk, you close your eyes and give into the bliss once again.
Even after he left, you’re sitting in the dark, in the same position he left you in, with his tie still around your neck. You feel embarrassed, but you can’t help yourself as you take in the scent of his tie, pleasuring yourself through your clothes, while thinking about him. He has a hold on you, and you know that well.
#fanfic#house md#greg house#robert chase#chase x reader#dr chase x reader#smut#robert chase x reader#dr house#dr house x reader#wowzieez#9899#robert chase imagines#imagine#robert chase oneshot#oneshot#robert chase one shot#robert chase x y/n#y/n#no mentions of y/n#hospital sex#hospital#doctor x nurse#fanfiction#smutfic#lemon
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(Post-Constant AU) Wilson starts to age, and because of his style, he's starting to look like HIM.
#dst wilson#dst wx78#wx-78#my art#doodle#wilson p higgsbury#post constant au#dst#don't starve#robert wagstaff#mentioned only
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I hate to bitch but… I’m going to:
There was just? So much wrong this season and not even because I wasn’t a fan of the ending - in fact, I quite liked that they were 8 little marigolds together - but the rest of it!?
There’s at least three plot lines that added fuck all to the story - and I’m all for fluffing out the stories/characters, love me a filler episode - but not only did we not have time for a filler episode with 4 less episodes than usual those plot lines added nothing to the characters or the story or anything really.
Klaus getting kidnapped (again), no one noticing (again) - getting possessed & having sex, getting buried alive (again, if ykyk) apart from Alison going to save him - what did it add? - I love Klaus he’s literally my favourite character, I always want more Klaus but it kind of feels like they didn’t know what to do with him? - “let’s make him relapse and do some crazy stuff, for shits and giggles!”
Diego & Luther going to the CIA - this is the one I see the most sense in of course, but apart from making Diego realise that he shouldn’t take Lila and his kids for granted and announcing that the CIA guy was part of the whole Jean & Gene cult thing (and getting to see David Castañeda’s abs (despite supposedly having a Dad Bod now?)) it kind of went on too long? It felt like it was slightly misplaced? Idk
And of course, how could it go unmentioned - the Five/Lila romance? whAT THE FUCK!??? Like it’s creepy both ways bcos Ritu Arya is 15 years older than Aidan Gallagher - freshly legal - and because Five is nearly 70 at that point? And that’s without even mentioning the fact that, oh yeah - Lila’s married to his BROTHER? But if you took it out - what would change? Genuinely? That Lila will always choose her family? Choose Diego? Tbh she could easily come to that conclusion without any romance, she clearly longed to go back more than Five did (who btw, abandoned his family after spending his entire life trying to save them - WHAT?)
The only one making any progress was Viktor
And so many things left unexplained- why did Ray leave Alison? What happened to Dave? (Guessing he’s long dead now but we still don’t know if Klaus’ s2 plan had any effect & the only hint of him we got this season was the dog tags (more than last season at least)) Why is Reggie a fucking alien? How did he get to earth??
I just feel so unpleasantly underwhelmed for a show that has meant so much to me the past few years, for an ending that was mildly disappointing but not as much as the 4 episodes that came before it.
#the fact I haven’t even mention everything that disappointed me this season is shocking#the umbrella academy#the umbrella academy spoilers#tua#tua season 4#tua s4 spoilers#five hargreeves#aidan gallagher#lila pitts#lila hargreeves#ritu arya#klaus hargreeves#robert sheehan#ben hargreeves#justin h min#alison hargreeves#emmy raver lampman#diego hargreeves#david castañeda#luther hargreeves#tom hopper#viktor hargreeves#elliot page#tua spoilers#my brain is weird#meme#memes
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#just a little reminder that Emmerdale confirmed that Robert is still The One for Aaron <3#robron#robert sugden#aaron dingle#victoria sugden#aaron x victoria#emmerdale#robert mentions#gifs#my gifs#2023#13/12/23#*
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transgender detector going haywire rn…
#the fact that this was in the down low (THEE gay episode) too#this is either transmasc chase getting pissed about being misgendered#or transfemme chase reacting in indignation to being outed#take your pick#this bad boy can fit soo much gender in them#house md#robert chase#gregory house#hatecrimes md#greg house#like I’m trying so hard not to see chase as anything but an annoying cishet man#but the sheer level of queer implications they throw at him makes it insanely difficult#remy thirteen hadley#the more I think about it the more canon it feels#because he doesn’t even have long hair anymore. he’s not so twinkishly pretty as to be mistaken for a girl at this age. so what was this!!!#he has STUBBLE#+ somebody mentioned in the rbs that this is also trans!remy proof and. omg ur so right#enby thirteen rights#or whatever other headcanons y’all have for ‘em!!#prodigal siblings#prodigal twins
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What it would actually be like to date various HBOWAR men (modern au):
by me and @guarnerepdf
Speirs:
-is a cokehead finance bro
-you wake up in the middle of the night to him watching you sleep with no explanation given, just an eery smile
-is gaslighting you for purposes unknown (moving your furniture one inch to the left etc)
-buys you the fucking tackiest expensive jewelry and designer clothes as random gifts but half of it is fake
-you justify staying because he takes you to NOBU but you’re afraid to google him
-malarkey keeps telling you he's a serial killer but he has such beautiful hair
-lipton keeps handing you domestic violence brochures when he thinks no one is looking. you throw them away because you want that fucking ugly gucci belt! and the staring is sort of charming after a while
-possibly has a secret child that he is hiding from you. you're not sure.
-the first time you have sex he chokes you without asking and is confused when you get mad at him over it.
-does coke while eating dry fruit loops cereal in the morning. somehow looks hot while doing it.
Liebgott and Webster:
-challengers level toxic throuple, these two come as a pair!
-liebgott is xanned out so badly on the regular that he does not remember the last time he washed his hands.
-lieb met bill and toye in rehab and now all his friends are undergrads even though he's going on thirty.
-lieb won't kiss you in the morning "goddamn it woman, brush your teeth" but will kiss webster no problem!
-lieb likes webster more, but web likes you more because you don't call him slurs and you let him rant to you about sharks.
-you and web unionize at some point to get liebgott back into rehab. when he's gone you realize your relationship is 200 million times healthier but also extremely boring. you take him back the minute he releases himself AMA.
-lieb cannot figure out how to work tiktok, meanwhile webster has 100k subscribers on youtube and does grwm story time videos.
-you once had to be driven home by babe from the gas station after lieb kicked you out of the car. the fight was because he didn't believe you when you said you were allergic to gluten. babe lets you play cinnamon girl by lana del rey on the way home.
-lieb keeps trying to weaponize therapy language against you, 'baby you're fucking gaslighting me!' webster just makes it worse when he tries to explain what the terms actually mean.
Bill:
-you start dating Bill after he steals you away from Babe. Babe was nice, but you got the ick immediately after realizing he's not the leader of the friend group.
-bill sends you disgusting dick pics with extremely poor lighting. you can see his bottle of lotion in the background.
-you think it's sweet that he brings flowers when you go out until you realize they're stolen from the neighbor's flowerbed.
-you have an extremely lavish jersey shore wedding that culminates in a horrible fight when he shoves cake in your face ruining your 400 dollar makeup (that you paid for) and your 2000 dollar dress (that you paid for). during your vows babe has to hold himself back from saying something when the priest asks if there are any objections.
-DIRTY fingernails! does not wash his hands. gives you a UTI but doesn't understand that it's his fault.
-Doesn't cheat but is always on the brink of it.
-Follows multiple swimsuit models on Insta, claims it's okay because 'sweetheart, listen, it's all on the screen!'
-Is so cheap he refuses to pay for extra sugar for your coffee, 'you've had it bitter before, babe.' you are ready to murder him. takes you to chili's and acts like it's a michelin star restaurant.
Talbert:
-cheats on you immediately. within the first week.
-sends you anonymous texts to get STD tested, too scared to actually go to the clinic but is certain he's dying of syphilis.
-cries to lip for an hour when you leave him for speirs.
Gale Cleven:
-'sweetheart. are you really gonna wear that out to dinner? it's a bit...well... risque.'
-accuses you of being an alchoholic every time you drink, but Bucky has done four Jeagerbombs tonight and isn't getting any lectures. Also. Why is Bucky with you two on your date night?
-is straight but keeps stringing Bucky along because he reminds him of his father and for narcissism reasons.
-marge messages you on facebook to warn you about him, and also to sell you on her new MLM scheme.
-bucky keeps giving you mean little grins as he hangs off your man....you are very close to murdering him.
-you finally leave him after he calls you daddy in bed. not mommy. but daddy.
Bucky:
-gives you chlamidya three weeks into dating. gaslights you into thinking you got it from sitting on a public toilet seat.
-drives drunk while you're in the passenger seat, goes above 90 and almost kills the both of you.
-is in love with gale and you both know it but refuses to talk about it.
-laughs when you start crying over your new STD diagnosis.
-is the worst boyfriend in the entire world. do not date this man!
Leckie:
-cheats on you with vera, but has a jealous meltdown everytime you talk to hoosier at house parties. you were literally just asking the man for a lighter.
-hoosier is stirring shit up for shits and giggles. he keeps liking your thirst trap insta photos, commenting 'photo cred'
-cries when you confront him about cheating. writes a poem to you about how badly hurt he was by the whole situation. says he only did it because that's how he was raised! no one taught him how to love properly!!
-exploits his family trauma at any given opportunity, shameless about it
-writes you sweet yet cringy love poems
-chuckler keeps trying to warn you but is so awkward about it that you just end up super confused
-blows up the minute you try and critique his writing
-tells you you're acting 'just like you're mother!' during arguments
-eventually you break up because you cheat on him with hoosier and he cheats on you again with vera
Hoosier:
-completely emotionally unavailable
-laughs at you in the middle of a fight, then when you storm out he stares at the wall for four hours straight. no blinking. no moving.
-goes to chuckler thinking he's dying because he has a 'weird feeling in his stomach.' the feeling is literally just a crush.
-catches leckie flirting with you. doesn't cause a scene but DOES immediately cheat on you as a retaliatory action. has no idea why you're mad about it.
-determined to hurt you before you hurt him.
-somehow makes you think you're in the wrong due to the sheer FORCE of his conviction that it was okay for him to cheat on you.
-you two break up but get back together after having a baby. the baby is possibly not hoosier's but he's a genuinely good father. (the baby very obviously has leckie's face. no one is fooled.)
-during your wedding ceremony leckie has to be thrown out after making the worst best man speech of all time.
-parent teacher conferences are a nightmare because your child is biting the other kids and is failing all her classes. hoosier blames you for not helping her with her homework. you all go out to souplantation afterwards and he keeps dropping barbs about you being a dumbass.
-the two of you stay married for 40 beautiful years before dying of old age. within those 40 years you separate and get back together a total of 5 times. leckie somehow outlives you both.
Luz:
-is sweet and lovely and handsome and makes you laugh a lot but
-you're banned from six movie theatres, three bars, the pier, disneyland, and a froyo shop
-you don't even LIKE froyo but the fact that you can't fucking go there anymore is driving you up the wall
-you got kicked out of disneyland because he got into a fistfight with donald duck
-his mother HATES you. she is the ultimate boy mom. they are constantly talking about you in Portuguese behind your back. she wears white to your wedding.
-cannot go grocery shopping because he's stopped every five feet by some old acquaintance. you have no idea how he knows any of these people!
Eugene:
-you're his beard but he doesn't know it
-is the ideal gay boyfriend/husband
-buys you flowers and takes you out on beautiful dates. cringes when you try to kiss him
-everything would be PERFECT except snafu keeps creating dummy accounts to harass you, drives by your house at all hours of the night, and you're pretty sure he's planning to SWAT you.
-eugene has no idea why you hate snafu? he's such a sweet guy!
Babe:
-you're a bit embarrassed to tell your friends you're dating him....he's sweet but just so dorky
-almost puked on you after taking a dab at bill's house. you had to comfort him for ten minutes
-long suffering angel who you cheat on because you know he's just too good for you.... better to hurt him before he leaves you first!
-is popular on tiktok somehow. you have no idea how this happened but it did
#we came here to set you x reader girlies STRAIGHT on some matters#ron speirs#ronald speirs#edward babe heffron#babe heffron#bill guarnere#bill hoosier smith#robert leckie#eugene sledge#floyd talbert#george luz#joseph liebgott#joe liebgott#david webster#gale cleven#john egan#john bucky egan#men not mentioned either bc we do not care about them or because they would be good boyfriends and there would be no drama#like...there is no drama dating malarkey or roe so as much as we love them. they r not on the list <3
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House, M.D. S1E1 “Pilot” deleted scene
#house md#house m.d.#housemdedit#allison cameron#robert chase#eric foreman#ericforemanedit#robertchaseedit#allisoncameronedit#the ducklings#s1 e1 pilot/everybody lies#foreman & cameron#foreman & chase#chase & cameron#*#*gifs#*house#usertj#usersapphi#100#this is actually such useful context… how long theyve been there#and cameron answering house’s emails gets mentioned later but then you wouldn’t know the significance of it unless you’d seen this scene#it just comes off as a throwaway line of like. house being an asshole I guess but like no she CHOSE to answer the emails#and wilson most likely doesn’t know that she chose to which is interesting
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BELL + ADLER
i don’t smoke - mitski / strangers - ethel cain / dissolved girl - massive attack / jigsaw falling into place - radiohead / tear you apart - she wants revenge / puppet - tyler, the creator
playlist under the cut.
#adbell: the musical#FOR MY FREAKS OUT THERE!!!!!!!#honourable mention: ‘it’s too bad you’re married to me’ mascara - deftones#more robert redford too i found more pics#russell adler#bell bocw#call of duty#black ops cold war#cod bocw#bocw#russell adler x bell#russell adler x reader#russell adler x oc#adler x bell#adbell#adlerbell#web weaving
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