#restructured life
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Re-Patterning your Life with Arden Leigh
#youtube#repatterning#restructured life#inner alchemy#creativity#spiritual lineage#writing in magic#magical experimentation
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My job is burning around me and I’m only seen as an expendable cog in a giant corporate machine, but at least I have Helpy to lend a brightly colored hand!!! <3
#am I talking about fazbear entertainment or my irl job? nobody knows#what I do know is today I found out we’re getting a salary increase freeze for 6 months at least#which in corporate speak probably means a year or more#and restructuring of the company may happen after that#who needs a livable wage? not me obviously#anyway I just needed my small pink boy to cheer me up and it helped a lil#it was fun drawing his blush that way I may keep doing that. hehe#and he must have pretty pink eyeshadow#I’ll be all good in a few days just processing my life asmkcpjsdklc#my baby bear my little skrunkly guy…..#I need a plush of him to kiss on the forehead…#fnaf#fnaf help wanted#help wanted 2#five nights at freddy's#helpy#fnaf helpy#art
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i think i have a type idk happy belated 520
#kart 🐮emoji#michael kaiser#blue lock#endo yamato#wind breaker#no bc endo fanart on twt changed my life#restructured my brain#head in hands rn
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#a doodley#i cant draw his hair shine anymore without thinking abt the ask saying it was so Rooster#so trueeeee my rooster boyyy *sobbing*#also always torn bc i like drawing haggard talon with big ears but i think fed talon wld have bigger ones ykwim#like when kittens have huge ears to grow into#also while im rambling here i wanna restructure his whole history again#vampirism being the result of a curse and negatively affecting him in a way he'll have to carry for the rest of his long immortal life#as well as forgoing feeding to Age and him physically feeling the ails of aging isn't enough...#im trying to conjure up smthng else that wldve happened to him in one of the worst times in his life but thats hard bc i cant explore it to#much bc the subject matter makes me sad LOL and also dont want to seem like those ppl who throw in stuff like that gratuitously
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youtube
cj the x is back with yet another banger that rewired my brain in real time
#and no it's not about barbie movie#i mean. it is very much but it does not discuss the movie itself#anyway great fuckin vid#youtube#cj the x#it many ways it sorta confirmed my existing life philosophy but also restructured so many concepts and that's why i love their video essays#also. some the biggest revelations i had were about characterizing vash the stampede of trigun fame in my fics and I love that for me#Youtube
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2014 ~ 2024
10 years apart! 10 years exactly from the first upload, in fact! 2014 was a big year for me in a lot of ways, and this drawing has always felt like a time capsule of that era because of how much I experimented with it - I have never been one for drawing backgrounds, any time I do one feels like a momentous achievement, frankly - and how proud I was of it at the time. Apologies for the repetitiveness of the redraws, but they’re genuinely very cathartic and are pulling me out of a pretty serious slump.
#artists on tumblr#illustrators on tumblr#digital art#draw this again#original character#digital illustration#original art#digital painting#illustration#art#fantasy art#fantasy character#medieval art#fairytale art#the comments on the original DA post are in fact a literal time capsule of my life then as well. mixed feelings there lol.#also I intentionally left out the chalice and wine because I couldn’t figure out where to put it#the windowsill didn’t work as a surface after the restructuring of that#and I tried to make everything sit together better and it left little room for another surface#I didn’t have the energy to draw an entire new table or something so I just left it out 😅
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kyoya offered to rearrange the furniture in his house just minutes after meeting tamaki the metaphors are so heavy handed i need to lie down
#you JUST met the boy and already are restructuring your whole life around him#theyve been married from the start because kyoya doesnt have another setting#also i feel like this came so late in the anime (to give it the extra emotional weight)#but its in vol 8 of the manga which is so interesting#im gonna try to pay attention to how this informs things here on out in the series#ohshc#ouran high school host club#kyoya ootori#tamaki suoh#moss does books#ecdysing
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when one of my friends started watching Mob I did the typical "haha soooo what do you think of this show? I like it a normal amount!" and he deadpanned "I can see you like it a normal amount, maybe 5-10 triangles worth" and ever since I have been using Triangles as a metric of Fandom Derangement.
#(for the record the actual number of Mob Triangles is 2176 and counting)#very funny to be like 'yeah i have like Four Triangles worth of feelings about this thing' (restructures my entire life around it)#mob talk#hubris quilting
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been looping the love you want by sleep token for the past five hours and thinking about the twinyards and yeah safe to say i'm a worse person now (thank you but AuUGH)
i mean, why not bring twinyard angst into sleep token? its a really fun way to turn a song into a gut-punch
and if u wanna think about euclid and the twins… well i wont take blame for that emotional blow but i cant unsee it so ill force it on you too:
#ghost in the hallway - drake haunting both andrew and aaron#head won’t stop turning as they think on what’s happened to them and what they’ve had to do#if my fate is a bad collision - andrew and the car crash he orchestrated with tilda#and if my mind is an open highway - restructures the bad collision to a metaphorical thing#indicating mental illness and could even relate to both aaron and andrews drug addictions#bad collisions in the open highways of their minds#‘in reverse you were [all] my symmetry a parallel i would lay my life on’ - realising how similar they are and how much they’re each willing#to sacrifice for the other to keep the other safe#LIKE#DO YOU SEE IT TELL ME IM NOT INSANE#andrew minyard#aaron minyard#sleep token#aftg song recs
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Today was the last DND session for a three-year campaign and I am big sad :(
One of the players brought whiskey for a last toast, which was very kind of them. I had never had whiskey before. Turns out I do not like whiskey. Unsurprising.
It tastes like slightly nicer hand sanitizer.
#blue chatter#it was a flavored whiskey as well#everyone else who had it said it was rly smooth and sweet#so I don’t think I super wanna know what regular whiskey tastes like#it was supposed to be like vanilla caramel flavored or smth#I was told it was like cream soda and that was a LIE it was like disinfectant#with a vanilla aftertaste#the campaign went rly rly well though#I’m seriously going to miss it#the final boss battle was just pure catharsis we absolutely whaled on that dark abberant goddess#she got Destroyed#an entire section of the continent restructured bc of the removal of her corruption#I rly like that my character got to be disabled at the tail end of this campaign#they wielded experimental magic that wasn’t supposed to work and resurrected someone who the Keeper very intentionally kept dead#it worked because they partially fused with Arawai the goddess of life and became her aspect on earth#but becoming partially divine in a mortal body takes a toll#they had more and more limited mobility and the more they cast magic to compensate the more of a toll it takes#functionally that meant my movement speed was reduced#and I lost more abilities after each combat as the consequences of overextending myself caught up to me#I wish I’d gotten to play this longer to see how this ended mechanically but it was a lot of fun to get a character who is both#very magically competent and still disabled and that still affects their ability and they still get the dignity of risk#to choose whether to continue casting or not knowing the consequences of doing so#it is very much a fantastical disability which I flavored heavily off of chronic fatigue and a mobility disorder#in-game their skin became hard and brassy around their joints which make them difficult and painful to bend#they lose a lot of sensation and fine motor control#thankfully they have a lot of money from their adventuring so they can commission an accessible house and mobility aids#and their friends help take care of them
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whats sad abt growing up is seeing how it genuinely was just an edgy phase for so many alternative looking or acting people like now theyre working at the house of representatives or a pro-israel thinktank posting to 2hollis. no girl!
#poser poser poser poser liar liar liar liar#‘my frontal lobe developed now i just want a soft life 🤭’ society should be restructured in a way to make these people not exist anymore#journal
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Ok it wasnt THIS bad so i dont wanna call it a Prophecy or anything (especially cuz even if smth were obviously broken the advice wouldve probably still just been 'ibuprofen' bc ribs r hard to heal) bc everyone was really nice and understanding But well. i was in pain in my bones and i did get told to try ibuprofen. so.it was more like. hello my name is doctor i understand u are coming in because you are pain in all of your bones ? im sorry that happened i can do a physical examination and then we can get u an xray ok ? Well theres nothing wrong with u that we can see ur xray looks good sorry.. just keep taking ibuprofen i guess. byebye👋
#text#health tag#THEY WERE NICE THOUGH im just sad i dont know wgats wrong#i do feel a little better rn. but thats probably because ive restructured my life around avoiding rib pain#neg
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Just saw a post that made a cool point about like, fantasy where Ancient Technologies are the most high tech of the setting, and things from the 70s have better longevity than new stuff made to be replaced, and it was very smart and coreect but it made me think of like, The Opposite Direction.
By which i mean Oh. The Sartan were the equivalent to that generation of technology where they built everything w Asbestos and went this is great. This is so resilient it will outlive us. Surely this has nothing nothing to do with our rapidly decreasing population-
#it is always the time to poke fun at sartan engineering but the thing is.#i find the specific Rule Of Cool Bad Desiginingness of it less interesting than the like.#principle of it. which is an almsot fallout level of Smugly Superior 'Progress' obsessed society grinding itself to Dust.#its quite literally about how Colonial Minds do not give a shit and do not comprehend the long term consoquences of Extracting Material#so a society of magic colonial imperialists trying to restructure THE EARTH to made up boundaries and make an infinite energy machine-#and driving themselves to the brink of extinction.#its not GOOD its awful and tragic for all the life lost in every step of this byt also. its poetic! or as the masses say a lmao!
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I love showing pictures of my birds to people because they are sweet and wonderful. However. Every time someone responds with "aweeee they're so cute 🥺 maybe I should get a bird 🥺" I do feel compelled to list out all the reasons that's probably a terrible idea. Which is admittedly a bit of a downer.
#having birds is like having children. in that you restructure your entire life around them and their incredibly specific needs#it works for me because I'm a weird person#but it certainly isn't for everyone#birds are high maintenance and loud and messy and expensive and hard to care for correctly#i love them so it's worth it#but like. most people should probably get a dog or something instead#fsp speaks#birbposting
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there is nothing more satisfying than finishing a scene that has been giving you nothing but issue when writing
#momo rambles#I’ve been stuck on this STUPID SCENE FOR FOUR DAYS#I HAD TO RESTRUCTURE IT SIX TIMES#RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#but uh. hey on the bright side#new last life chapter soon(ish)?#:’D
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Plot outlines are vital to my writing process. They help me hone in on the trajectory of the story, giving my brain something to ignore while taking the draft in an entirely different direction.
#every time#EVERY TIME#i generally stick to the overall plot arc i had in mind#in terms of working toward the basic ending i planned#but my detailed outlines are a graveyard of ideas my brain turns down in favor of bullshit it makes up on the spot#trust the process#but have you considered that my process is being steered by a drunk driver with no regard for where i said we were going#like i just wrote a scene that completely contradicts the order in which i had planned to reveal certain information#but its good so of course now i have to keep it and figure out how to restructure the rest going forward#writer problems#writer life#on writing#writing#plot and structure#plot
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