#reading about him going on about life eternal breaks my heart tbh

[copias-juicebox]

"I CAN EXPRESS MYSELF MORE IN DANCE MACABRE OR MUMMY DUST"

mans telling us he is a little dancey princess and a fucking sex god at the same time... 💀

Interview from Sweden Rock Magazine 10/2023

Hi, hi. There is an interview with Tobias in SRM’s newest issue, but it’s in the subscribers only section, so I thought I’d translate/share since I guess not many people will be able to get their hands on it. It is about Prequelle and it’s part of SRM’s „200 best Swedish hard rock albums of all time” series. Prequelle placed #68. The other albums may have scored higher, but for now we don’t know the whole list. Either way, enjoy. Very insightful. 

„Do you think that "Prequelle" is Ghost's worst album?” Now that’s an unusual opening question. Especially when the interview is about an album that Sweden Rock Magazine's writers and qualified Swedish hard rock musicians (including Tobias Forge) have voted as one of the 200 best Swedish hard rock albums of all time. The question wasn’t planned, but comes spontaneously, as a reaction to the first thing Tobias Forge says when we sit down on opposite sofas in the record company office. I'm here for a two-part interview, partly about the EP "Phantomime" (published in #6 2023), partly about "Prequelle". Neither record companies, artists, voters, nor even our writers who conduct interviews for this series of articles have any idea what placement an album has received. Interviews are often done well in advance and we simply don't want placements to leak and become public long before publication.

No Ghost album has ever been on the list before. The idea is actually to end the day with the "Prequelle" talk, but when Tobias Forge suddenly starts with a funny little comment that this album is probably the one that those who have voted think is Ghost's worst or least popular album, I just have to take the opportunity to ask the question: Do you think that "Prequelle" is Ghost's worst album?

No, absolutely not, he says and laughs. If I'm going to be completely pragmatic, I'd say: "How many songs do we actually play from that record?" There are songs that work damn well live and sit where they should. So it's a pretty strong album.

But is this what you are basing it on? "Prequelle" was released after Ghost had become really big so it can't be compared to "Opus Eponymous" and "Infestissumam" which you don't play many songs from. I mean, no matter what kind of record you had released when "Prequelle" came out, you would still have played many songs from it and they would have worked precisely because Ghost's songs nowadays are moulded more to the arena format.

I don't know how to answer that, it's difficult. If the album had been different, it would have been. If I'm going to talk somehow both artistically and practically, I know that for every record we have become exponentially bigger. "Prequelle" was definitely no exception, but it also took us a big step forward and upwards and we became bigger and broader. To the extent that when we introduce old songs in the live set, you notice that there are elements on albums one and two that make some songs more difficult to play. Not technically, we can play the songs, but they don't work in quite the same way as the later songs, which means that there is a slight favouritism.

I asked the original question about whether you think it's Ghost's worst album only because you directly said that this means it's the least popular one.

I'm just so full of myself I assumed all the other albums are also in the top 200, which may actually be incorrect. This might be the best album and the others aren't even there, haha.

It wasn't long after "Prequelle" was released that you were self-critical of the album in interviews, saying that it was too ballad-heavy and a bit too soft. I haven't noticed that before, you being so self-critical shortly after the release.

Yes, but I still feel that way. If, as an artist, I am only going to look at the work with the criticism that one can feel towards one's own work, I think that if things had been different or if I had more time, I might have wished that I had managed to get maybe two more hard songs. Maybe one more hard song would have fit on the album and another harder song might have phased out one of the ballads. Now five years after the album came out, I know that the two ballads ("Pro Memoria" and "Life Eternal"), which I may not think are bad, are one too many. But I know that many of the people who like the band like both of them, so it's kind of a useless argument.

Who sets the length of an album? Have you set a limit, that it can't be longer than this and have no more songs than that?

No, but it must fit on an LP disc and there is a physical limit. I think the absolute pain threshold is 46 minutes and that's 23 minutes on each side. Now maybe Mikkey Dee (co-owner of Spinroad Vinyl Factory) will raise his hand here: "But I can make it longer!" And it's maybe 48 minutes, I don't know, but I do know that when a disc starts getting so full that you start getting close to the sticker, it starts to sound bad. Especially nowadays, because recordings today are so very maximalist in scope. It's one thing if you record 60s music with drums, a guitar and bass where the sound is cleaner and finer or if you play acoustic stuff with just vocals. Bob Dylan records could have eight songs on each side and it worked all the way through. But this kind of fairly compact music doesn't work well. Not only am I a militant vinyl advocate, I think we should respect the fact that most artists don't manage to create more than 45 minutes of good music on a regular basis. A lot of famous double records are not that good. I don't think the Rolling Stones "Exile On Main St" is very good. It might as well have been on one disc. And if I'm actually going to turn it into something completely mundane, I'd say that I think it's irresponsible to sit and make records with twelve songs if it results in the record being 63 minutes long and you automatically have to make a double record. It's pretty wasteful.

When you said that it's irresponsible, I thought you were going to say that it's irresponsible to print a double vinyl because of the environmental destruction that it entails.

Of course, if we're going to be completely straightforward and not do anything that harms nature, we shouldn't even release any records, so I say this with reservation. But with that in mind and for the sake of art, I think more people should embrace the actual given format that has been the most prevalent in rock history. There is a reason why a film is usually one hour and 30 minutes. You can’t take any more. There's a certain dramaturgical structure and there’s a certain comfort in it. Then the CDs came along they screwed that up, and suddenly there weren't two sides anymore but it started one way and ended another. Now that the CD is no longer important and we've gone back to vinyl, creators should follow suit and start embracing the physical rules.

Are there songs that have been rounded off just because you thought „I have to round off here, because if I continue, it won't fit on the vinyl disc"?

We actually had that problem on the last album. „Watcher In The Sky” ended the A-side and the outro is much longer on the CD and digitally. Two minutes longer I think. Much, much, much longer. It's long, noisy and has all these dives. It's a very chaotic soundscape. You get the feeling that it goes on and on, and on the vinyl it's just the beginning of an outro and then it drops almost immediately. I think that was a huge mistake.

So the overall sound quality was more important than vinyl buyers getting everything? Because you could have pressed the vinyl and it would have fit, but you would have had to compromise the sound quality.

Yes, exactly. You can get the song to just keep going until the vinyl simply runs out. Then it just starts spinning in the middle, depending on what kind of record player you have. But the problem then, if you want to anticipate events at a creative stage, is that people today buy and listen to vinyl records and are sensitive. It's quite common for people to complain that the record is broken. I don't just mean our records, but people complain a lot about the presses. If you make ten songs, it's therefore stupid to have a too thick soundscape towards the end of song number five and song number ten. If you want to be really good and old school, that's where you put a piano ballad because it's an easier sound to handle so far into the record. This is what I think about when I make records. But clearly sometimes I miscalculate.

This must cut right through the record collector Tobias Forge's whole body and soul, that "Watcher In The Sky” is shortened by two minutes on the vinyl of all versions.

Well... I don't toss and turn and wake up in the middle of the night thinking about it anymore. But when it happened, I was livid. Luckily it was just an outro. It would have been worse if it had continued with some kind of narrative into the next song. Now I can't remember in my head how long "Prequelle" is, but if I'd had to go back in time and just re-construct it, the re-construction wouldn't have had much to do with the existing material, I would have just wanted to add a scene. And it's not a scene that's missing, it's just for the sake of balance. It became asymmetrical in a way that bothers me a bit.

You've talked about this before, but it was before "Prequelle" that you really started to talk a lot about how you were thinking about what kind of new songs might suit the live show. Can you get stuck in that mindset, thinking more about what songs are needed live right now rather than creating an album that will last 30 years?

Hmm... (long pause)... The reason I'm sitting here thinking is because I'm trying to come up with examples of other bands that I think might have gone through something similar. I’m looking for examples to the answer I'm about to formulate and that is that: yes, I think there comes a point in the career when most bands make a record because they simply feel they need to… Because what we're talking about is that when you go from playing in small smoky clubs in front of an already inveterate audience that already understands the perhaps a little more chewy expression, that experience can change if you start playing in front of a larger and especially a different type of audience. When a different type of audience comes and you play in a different format, you discover that this song doesn't work very well, it doesn't sound very good and it's difficult to get the sound right. Then there's usually a record or two or three during your career when this transition happens where you start filling in with songs that work better live. Look at Piece of mind", "Powerslave" and "Somewhere in time". There's a reason why Iron Maiden didn't play a lot of the first two albums there and then, because it was easier to play the new songs. You get to that point somewhere in your career and it's very difficult to say when it is - there's no given rule and there are artists who continue to release relevant records and have an amazing ability to release new records and just play the whole new record. Well, now Iron Maiden does that and tests their audience a little bit in that way, but then they will always compensate by doing like a "best of" set the following year so everything is forgiven. Now we're in the middle of the "Impera" period here and have a very strong set, but I'm starting to feel that now that I'm about to start writing a new album, it feels like it's not really on my agenda to write three more albums that will change the live setlist ten years ahead. I think we already have the blueprint for what is Ghost's setlist, especially if you include the entire catalogue. After a while, each new record you make becomes a little less important. It's really hard to know when that point comes, but the truth is that new records don't matter in the same way. Slayer didn't have to release "Divine Intervention”. They definitely didn't have to release "Diabolus In Musica". I didn't care about it and I just wanted to hear the old stuff. If they had just come up and played "Reign In Blood" I would have been soooo happy. And that's the way it is with most bands. Nobody would be sad if the Rolling Stones came up and didn't play anything from "Emotional Rescue". And that's just the way it is. In the future, I can see a scenario where there is probably a basis to possibly build up an alternative setlist. There are so many songs that we do not play and that I have nothing against - I love them too! But it would almost be easier to build up a completely alternative setlist and run a show with only the odd songs. There are so many songs now. There's no reason not to build on that. But when I want to make a new record, it's irresponsible for me not to consider that there might have to be some songs that are a bit more direct. But it doesn't hurt me if we have more songs that we don't play live. I don't know if this answers your question...

I would actually like to ask exactly the same question again, because I wonder if you yourself feel that you get stuck during the making of the record. You said that you would have liked to include another hard song because "Prequelle" doesn't have the balance that you would have liked to have in retrospect.

Exactly, but the explanation for that has more to do with my mental capacity there and then. I simply couldn't cope. I felt that I had probably maxed out… It was probably about as much as I could do that year. That's the simple explanation. To get another song that would have fit and that would have fulfilled this requirement that I now in retrospect would have wished I had, it would have required something that I did not have there and then. The only thing that could have made it easier is if I had more time. It is difficult to reason about it, you see.

I was in the studio for a few days during the recording and it's one of the few times in all these years that I've done interviews where someone has started crying during an interview. It was quite obvious that everything that had happened with the split of the band affected you.

Yes. Of course. It did.

Is "Prequelle" a difficult album to listen to for you? Can you sit and listen to it all the way through? 

Well, at the moment I have to do that from time to time, and listen to all the records, because we're just about to start rehearsing again and then I sometimes have to go back and just listen to the record to go: "Fuck, is that really how I sing?" Especially when we start rehearsing, I can be a bit like: "Damn, who changed this bit?” Then I usually sit down and it hits me: "Oh, it's me who has changed my song!" You simply do that over the years, you start singing it in a slightly different way. So sometimes I have to go back and listen, but it’s more practical. I don't think it's fun to listen them. I do it until they are finished. I listen over and over and over again and really try to listen with all the imaginary ears and all the imaginary perspectives you can have. "How would I have listened to this if I had heard it from this perspective?" Just to get as "objective" a perspective as I can until I'm satisfied, but then it's like „No, I don't want to hear this anymore". But I have to say that I think "Prequelle" is a very tolerable disc despite everything that interfered with the process. Therapeutically, it works quite well considering that we are still playing at least half of the album. For every artist there are songs that you want to play, and there are songs that you don’t want to play because they feel too personal. I don't feel that way about this one, it's more like: "Ah hell, they're part of the setlist and people like it and it sounds good. So that's what we're doing."

On a personal level, was Tom Dalgety the perfect producer for you, the way you were feeling at the time? Tom feels like the kindest, sweetest producer you can meet. He wasn't the kind of producer who pushed you very much, it was more of a nice atmosphere between you.

Yes, really, and it would have been different if Klas Åhlund, who is more confrontational, had been in the room. Now Klas and I are great mates, so it would certainly have been very therapeutic also, but it would have been a different process. If an artist comes in who is in such bad shape that they can't make a record, or a band where the main songwriter has just left them, then a Bob Ezrin goes in and says: "If you don't make the record, I'll make the record myself.” And he goes and makes Kiss "Destroyer" or Alice Cooper records. I'm not saying they didn't make them, just that you hear that Bob Ezrin made "Beth". It's a type of producer that's very different from a lot of other producers who maybe act a little bit more like buddies and cheerleaders and make the atmosphere good. Bob Ezrin doesn't care so much about the atmosphere in the room. Klas is somewhere in between, I would say. Given the condition I was in during "Prequelle", the result could probably have been different if Klas had come in. Ironically, there was actually talk of him doing it, but he didn't have the time and we'll never know how it would have turned out. I only know that it would have been different, but right there and then Tom was fantastic. I know that a lot of bands like to work with him because he is technically brilliant. He's really good at those typical sounds that people like: cool drums, guitar, bass, tone and clarity. He is also very "happy go lucky", a nice guy who sits and jokes all the time. Even if he has a bad day, it doesn't affect anyone else, which is convenient.

Let me compare it to when a writer contacts me after an interview and says "that was such a nice interview". For me, "nice" is not something positive in such a work situation and the result is often better when there is a little friction.

Mmm, and that is more Klas. There is more friction and more confrontation. And I was much better equipped for that at "Meliora" and later at "Impera". I felt better and was simply stronger. There wasn't the same survival instinct as on "Prequelle". If I think back, not about how the album turned out and how I have to live with it, but if I think back to the situation I was in, I was very anxious all the time. Even though I'm happy with the result, I wouldn't want to go through the recording again, even though Tom was great. Because it's hard to work when you're under attack. I realised that now when I made "Impera", when it was no longer like that. You are much more comfortable, it doesn't feel the same, you are more mature, you make better decisions, you are more controlled or dare to be uncontrolled. When things are this serious, you can end up in a freeze mode. Maybe that's also why there wasn't another song. The song that I miss doesn't exist because I simply squeezed out everything I had. If I had been in a different emotional state, I might have been more comfortable working out something at the last second from bits and pieces. But I felt that I really just wanted to get it done, deliver it, get back out on tour and start over again.

When you described being more mature during "Impera" you sounded like a 70-year-old, kind of like all the Aerosmith-like bands that have been fighting all their lives and now that they're in their 70s they say "we're soooo mature,” haha.

I think with all artists, especially when they're required to work in a group, there are many recordings that have been a collision with a wall because you're expected to function in a context all the time, whatever and whenever. But you do change and from one year to a few years down the line there can be a huge difference in a person's drive, hunger and priorities in life. Whether you have the same band structure as I do or whether you play in Metallica, people come in one state and they may end up in another, because you have different priorities at different times. It's unfortunately against the whole rock myth. I think that's the biggest problem for bands and businesses, that you always have this idea that if you just get to a certain stage - not just monetarily or career-wise, but you get to a certain stage of fun - then we've reached the status quo. But that is never the case! Never! There’s always something. Even in the best moments when everything is working, the band is awesome, everyone is working well, the crew is awesome, everyone is laughing, it's just a party all the time mentally, you have the world's best tour manager, everything is flowing and the tickets are selling, there will always be someone who doesn't like it and then has to break away and want to do their thing because it's no longer fun. It's usually somewhere in the lead-up to a stage where it's interesting and then once you've achieved it, it all becomes a bit boring. Just like in a relationship some people may eventually think, "well, that's a bit boring, I have to go out and do something else".

Since I was in the studio when you were laying down guitars on "Witch Image", my heart beats a little extra for that song and I thought it would be a great live song, but you've barely played it (at the time of writing it's Ghost's forty-fourth most played song live).

We did it during the "Prequelle" tour, or "A Pale Tour Named Death" as it was called. Then we did quite a few "an evening with" concerts, for better or worse. The advantage was that if you were a big fan of the band we actually played a lot of songs and actually a lot of the first albums, like "Idolatrine" - or "Witch Image". We did a set, a break and then a whole other set. That was a bit of a taste of what I was talking about earlier: doing a slightly larger set and then a slightly smaller one. You just shouldn't do it on the same night because it gets a bit stale. We played for two hours and 30 minutes or something and that wasn’t a good idea, haha. At least we did "Witch Image", but it has fallen behind a bit and it doesn't mean that we will never play it again, just that we don't do it right now. What I've been happy about is that there has been a feeling for the records that we've made recently, "Prequelle" and "Impera", that people still want to hear the new stuff. We haven't gotten to that stage that I talked about earlier when it doesn't matter anymore. Then it's very fun to try to find a new way to perform the songs, not technically, but suddenly a song like "Witch Image" might fulfill a very nice purpose between a completely new song and another song.

Let me speculate: in 30 years, I think "Rats" will be considered the great hard rock song, "Dance Macabre" the great hit and "Life Eternal" the great ballad. What do you think? Will this in the future be seen as the three big songs of the album?

Yes, that makes sense, I think. I understand that an instrumental song automatically ends up in the wake of a "best of" collection, in the sense that you do one in 30 years. I realise it's not a hit but the instrumental "Miasma" is a big part of our live show. It's strong and feels like such a keeper. Now we don't play "Life Eternal" very often actually, but it was very well received. For some reason people like to get married to it, I don’t know why, hehe. It's nice but it's also a bit like U2’s „I still haven't found what I'm looking for" and you don't use that one at a wedding. But people like it and I guess interpret it differently to me. It’s also a song that I don't think is fun to play live.

And why not?

Because I find it hard to play ballads. Physically, they don't feel the same as rock songs. I miss the "dunka dunka". Now everyone who plays music today knows what I mean - sorry, readers who don't play music - and it's that there's a small problem with having in-ear monitors. This means that you have to reach a certain frequency of beats in order to feel the music, unlike when you played at clubs with only a guitar amp behind you. You felt every single note you made and it just went through your body. Nowadays, I think it's sometimes hard when you play slow songs, because you have to trust that it sounds good, whereas when you play a rock song, you feel that it sounds good.

Does it also apply to "He Is” which is such a huge ballad, not least live?

Well, just the intro and then it gets going quite quickly and suddenly becomes a hard and rather fast-paced song. The classic ballad concept has always been that you play so-called edge beats to make it sound soft, while "He Is” is actually a rather hard-played song considering that it is a ballad. Once the drums come in – boom, boom – it's got AC/DC bite to it. It has a rock feel to it that "Life Eternal" doesn't really have. As I said, I don't think that "Life Eternal" is a lot of fun to perform, but that doesn't mean that it isn't quite good to listen to. It’s just that when I play "Dance Macabre" or "Mummy Dust" I feel that I can express myself physically more in line with what the text says and what it means.

[fromthedeskoftheraven]

Please tell me what you can about Break my Baby. I love a good Max.

Adira, my dear(a) 💖

This idea has had me in a chokehold for literal years but I've just never gotten serious about writing it. The gist is that Max sweet-talks his assistant into going to a corporate retreat with him, where forced-proximity shenanigans and budding attraction ensue. BUT on the way home they're in a car accident and the assistant is mortally wounded, so Max has to make the quick decision to turn her instead of letting her die. They navigate her new vamp life together and (of course) end up in fluffy eternal love.

A little piece of a scene under the cut (tbh I don't know why it's in first person. the muse wants what it wants):

***

Max looks up from his desk with a dazzling smile when I walk into his office juggling his coffee and mine along with my purse and laptop bag.

"There's my favorite little juice box."

"Stop calling me that, it was one time. When you were allegedly at... undeath's door."

He gives an exaggerated frown, swallowing a swig of the black coffee I’ve unloaded onto his desk. "Allegedly? Sunshine, you wound me."

"Don't tempt me. Home Depot has stakes, you know."

"Speaking of steaks, have dinner with me tonight."

"No, thank you."

"You work too hard. You deserve a nice meal, a glass of wine. Creme brulee for dessert."

The thought trickles through my mind, syrupy and comforting and a little fuzzy around the edges, like a drop of warm honey.

It has been a long day, and I am hungry, and that place two blocks over does an amazing creme brulee.

And Max isn't that bad, after all, and he'll be on his best behav—

Wait a minute.

I feel like I’m moving in slow motion as I dig my fingers into the tender flesh of my tricep and pinch, like my sister used to do when we’d fight as kids. The sudden clarity makes me shake my head.

"Really, Max?"

He only shrugs. "What am I supposed to do? You're no fun."

"You don't pay me enough to be fun."

"Well, let me get the paperwork to HR and I’ll call for a reservation."

"If there's nothing else, I have emails to answer," I say, turning toward the door.

"Oh, yeah." Max starts flicking through papers on his desk. "There's that thing this weekend, I need you to go with me."

I blink. "The thing? What thing?"

"You know..." He waves one hand in a distracted circle. "The thing for the company."

"No, I don’t know. Mind-reading is supposed to be your thing."

"I've told you, I can't read minds. This," he says, fishing a brochure out of the pile. "The sales managers' annual retreat."

"In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not a sales manager. And I have plans this weekend."

Binge-watching the Great British Bake Off over takeout absolutely counts as plans.

"Cancel 'em. I need my trusty assistant, gotta impress corporate with how organized and efficient I am."

"You mean, how organized and efficient I am," I counter. "Again, plans."

“Just look at the brochure.” Max shifts tactics to turn the puppy-dog eyes up to eleven. “An all-expense-paid weekend at an exclusive resort upstate, how can you say no to that? You do work too hard, you know.” 

Begrudgingly, I open the glossy brochure he’s shoved into my hands. Rolling green hills surround a hotel that looks like a French chateau. Smiling people are playing golf, swimming in a massive indoor pool, relaxing in a sauna, clinking champagne glasses in a gold-trimmed dining room. A bed as big as my studio apartment is dressed in crisp white linens, with mints on the pillows.

Binging the Great British Bake-Off in a free fancy hotel room wouldn’t be too bad, as plans go.

I look back to Max, watching me expectantly. “You drive and pay for gas,” I start.

Victory sparks in his dark eyes. “Fair enough.”

“During free time, I get to do whatever I want. No meetings, no spreadsheets, no fetching extra ice for your drink.”

“You won’t even know I’m there.” He lays a hand over his lifeless heart like he’s taking an oath of office or something.

This is going better than I expected. Might as well shoot for the moon.

“And I get a clothing allowance. I don’t have any resortwear.”

“You need any help shopping? I drove past the mall the other day, and Victoria’s Secret had this little red number in the window—”

“What do you think?” I ask dryly.

A grin dimples his cheek. “You drive a hard bargain, Sunshine. Deal.”

“Seriously?”

“Eh, why not? I’ll expense everything, anyway. Just have to get creative with the codes.”

This is probably a mistake. 

Best-case scenario, I’ll have stories to tell at cocktail parties. If I’m ever invited to one, that is. Worst case, I end up in prison for staking my boss.

“Fine,” I sigh. “What time are we leaving?”

“I’ll pick you up at 7:30 sharp on Friday morning. Can’t miss the welcome breakfast,” Max says cheerfully.

“Your turn to bring my coffee, then. I want a—”

“Decaf caramel latte with almond milk, extra whip. I know.”

I frown. “Yeah. That.” 

“Well, don’t let me keep you. Those emails won’t answer themselves, am I right?” Max dismisses me with a wink and a flourish of finger guns.

Finger guns.

After two years of working for Max, my eye roll is a reflex. He’s so corny, it distracts me from the weirdness of the most self-focused person I know paying attention to my coffee order.

***

Thank you for asking!

[spookyactionanyway]

So I took all of Billie's songs and put them to the plot of Twilight. I'll explain under the reading break ↓

Not My Responsibility - The Cullens just existing in forks like

Come Out and Play - The cafeteria stare downs in the first movie, also in reference to Edward not being able to read Bella’s mind during the first movie (also not acknowledging that he literally wanted her dead in the first movie based on Midnight Sun)

When I Was Older - Edward’s transformation to a vampire with a nod to his human life

My Strange Addiction - Charlie describing his entanglement with Carlisle to Billy Black 😂😂😂 (the power of this one??? Woah)

Bury a Friend - when Edward is like “say it, out loud. Say it!” Cause he’s like “what the fuck how do you know so much.” Another re-up on the “I’m a killer” speech.

When the Party’s Over - Edward and his “I’m a killer”™️. Edward saying he’s a killer is the exact same as Jughead’s “I’m a weirdo” speech tbh

OverHeated - Bella not giving a fuck about Edwards "I'm a killer"™️ bullshit

Lost Cause - when Bella had to be mean to Charlie to leave

Everybody Dies - Bella while James' venom is changing her

Oxytocin - Victoria snapping after the Cullens kill James and she makes it her goal to hunt Bella and kill her

Lovely - Their tension throughout the whole first movie, as well as any and all scenes where they stare at each other in The Field™️

Bored - Bella during ✨October✨, ✨November✨, ✨December✨

Male Fantasy - Also Bella during ✨October✨, ✨November✨, ✨December✨

My Boy - Bella during Edwards absence in New Moon

Your Power - Jacob's thoughts about Edward in regards to Bella while he's disappeared in New Moon ("You ruined her in a year, don't act like it was hard" like HELLO???)

Six Feet Under - Edward’s perspective of him leaving her. ESPECIALLY the line “how can you die carelessly” in reference to her wanting to be a vampire and him being MUY not chill with it

I Didn’t Change My Number - Jacob when he first joins the pack and is mad at Bella for not fucking him and choosing a bloodsucker™️

ilomilo - the brief window where Edward thinks Bella’s dead

Listen Before I Go - Edward when he thinks Bella’s dead cause he tried to kill himself by flashing humans

All the Good Girls Go to Hell - Edwards perspective on Vampirism™️ because he’s “eternally damned” or something

You Should See Me in a Crown - Rosalie just after turning and getting that good good revenge

My Future - Bella realizing she’s decided to turn and would have to move away from forks (cause y’know, the whole not aging sitch)

Party Favor - Jacob during his wolfy brood in Eclipse cause Bella wouldn’t fuck him. With some parts from Bella’s perspective because he was just whole ass ignoring her signals of wanting to only be friends

Happier Than Ever - The weird back and forth when Jacob and Bella kiss in Eclipse 🫤

8 - Jacob because Bella won’t fuck him™️™️™️ (when he dips in Eclipse, cause he’s an asshole in Eclipse)

Bitches Broken Hearts - Jacob during Eclipse

Everything I Wanted - Edward is the one “dreaming of everything he wanted”, that being that Bella won’t turn and will live a long, happy human life. BUT the lines outside of that are Bella being like “okay, but I wanna be with you forever” and the chorus is Edward @ Bella until the “if I could change the way that you see yourself” bit, that’s Bella’s response (I may as well just fucking color code cause omg)

I Love You - all the back and forth between Edward and Bella for the first like 2-3 movies cause god forbid anyone be direct in their feelings

No Time To Die - Victoria’s perspective of James’ murder and the growing anger (BITCH THE POWER OF THIS ONE WOW)

Watch - how Jacob wished Bella would feel about Edward

Wish You Were Gay - Jacob because he can’t understand why Bella won’t fuck him and he’s a Pencil Dick Piss Baby™️ about it

Xanny - Jacob @ the Cullens because he just can’t fathom why Bella would choose them over him (comparing the Cullens to drugs lmao)

Getting Older - Bella reflecting on her high school friends now that she’s a vampire and can’t talk to them anymore

Halley’s Comet - Bella now that she’s a vampire and has to not speak to her family ever again (specifically her mom)

Billie Bossa Nova - Edward's inner turmoil with wanting Bella but not wanting to taint her with his sinner lifestyle™️

Therefore I Am - Jacob when he has to help the Cullens against Aro and his "witnesses" but he's actively mad at them and only doing it for Bella and Renesmee lmao

Goldwing - Bella hiding/protecting Renesmee from the Volturri

NDA - Renesmee type beat lmao

[59writes]

SEVENTEEN- REACTION: THEIR S/O GETS INJURED (PT. 1)

written for the lovely @honeyylin

again, thank u for being my first request, I will love u eternally (:

I might do the other version still, idk yet!!! but I hope this is satisfactory!!!

(also shout out to my phone for autocorrecting “finally” to “fistula” I hate it here lol)

tw: food, injury

SEUNGCHEOL

• Homeboy would do his damn best to stay focused on whatever task at hand!!!

• he knows you’re a responsible person and you reassured him on the phone that you’re completely fine, but he’s still got the jitters

• but after he zones out for the third time in a row, Jihoon kicks him out of the studio and tells him to go home

• ��you’ll do better there, hyung.”

• “But… the songs-“

• “you’re not exactly contributing right now. go home.”

• and so he does, fidgeting the whole way back

• his anxiety is truly at a peak as he reaches the apartment door, practically chewing through his lip as he fumbles with the keys

• he calls your name the second the door swings open

• “y/n?”

• your head pops up from the couch, tired but grinning wildly. “Cheol!”

• the next thing you know he’s wrapping you in a hug, tension finally leaving him

• “I thought you were at the studio.” You frown when he finally moves away.

• “Jihoon made me leave.” He pouts, sitting down on the floor, eyes even with your leg, which is propped up on a chair. “I was too… out of it?”

• “Aw. I’m really okay, Cheol.” You assure again, reaching down to grab his hand, giving it a squeeze.

• “I know, I know. Just… worried.”

• It’s very clear he’s trying not to make a fuss and ask a million questions about the state of your existence, so you pat the couch next to you.

• “C’mon, we’ve got the day off now. Do you wanna finish the show?”

• His face reluctantly breaks into a grin, hopping up to join you on the couch

• and both of you forget about the pains for a little while as you lose yourself in the screen

• it’s peaceful and warm, and finally, you both get a chance to slow down

• maybe you should get injured more often (/j)

JEONGHAN

• he trusts that you’re completely fine, but he does not trust that you won’t somehow hurt yourself again

• he will babyproof the house for the next few days

• “nope, you’re not allowed to chop vegetables. give me the celery.”

• “hey! let me get that, idiot, you’re hurt.”

• “I don’t care. If you want the cat then text me and I’ll get her for you.”

• just generally being a nuisance, you know how it is

• but still, in his babyproofing he does make sure you take your pain meds on time, setting a little alarm on his phone so he can wake you up with a glass of water and your pills

• he also doordashes you your favorite food without announcing like he just says “Steve is on his way with food” and you have to just ponder who Steve is until some guy knocks on your door

• “he paid me extra to say that you’re the love of his life, so…”

• “let’s not and say we did.”

• he always makes sure to order something sweet too (:

• but yeah he’s doing work around the house and forcing you to stay in bed

• tbh it’s like having a very bossy butler lol

• but hey, at least he’s actually doing his own laundry for once!

JOSHUA

• oh my god he drops everything when he gets your text

• it’s literally just “hey josh can I get some help? I hurt myself moving some furniture” and this man goes feral

• you know how someone is so anxious that their brain shuts off and they’re scarily calm??? Joshua.

• he’s at your house in like, five minutes

• and tbh you just wanted him to finish moving the bookshelf so you didn’t have to

• but now he’s gently scolding you while wiping dirt and blood from your leg

• it’s not even that big of a cut but he’s treating it like open heart surgery

• like his hands are so gentle…

• of course he moves the bookshelf after a little more scolding before like,,, making soup like this man would definitely make soup

• like it’s just an annoying cut that’s gonna leave a bruise and this man is making some chicken noodle in the next room over like you’re dying of pneumonia

• it’s some good ass soup tho (:

JUN

• he would not know what to do tbh but he would be excellent company while you waited to heal

• he’d definitely be very panicky but would hide it as best he could!! cuz you’re the top priority!!!

• he’d lurk and when you get up he’d be like “do you need anything? aspirin? food?” and you’re just like “Jun I’m good I just need to go to the bathroom”

• he definitely knows exactly what you like, and does his best to do things like keep your favorite show on, or make you tea.

• (even when you assure him that you’re fine)

• his help is very random and antsy but still excellent lol

• and the fact that he’s constantly here to help really proves how much he cares about you and your health (:

HOSHI

• oh god, this man

• he’d be all over the place

• overreacting and then scolding and then just zoning out and then he falls asleep smh.

• this man would get out a chainsaw and ask which door you stubbed your toe on so he can destroy it lol

• but alas, no chainsaw is around (thank goodness)

• and so Soonyoung just gets to blame everything else while you’re replacing bandages or whatever

• like, he’s going on about how “just because they have safety stickers on ladders doesn’t mean they’re safe!!” and you’ll hold out your hand for gauze and he’d instinctively just grab it and put it in your hand even though he’s on a bit of a rampage

• he also most definitely is the kind to get a stuffed animal for when you’re hurt lol like every time you get sick or injured badly he gets you a bear that says “get well soon” on its stomach or on the heart it holds in its hands and eventually you just have a pile of creatures encouraging you to be healthy

WONWOO

• this man is just. excellent

• he’s caring without being demeaning, and is just so so so helpful

• he comes home and sees your arm bandaged up and just asks what happened

• and you tell him the story and he tries to hide his smile when he hears about your dumb mistake

• but still he’s patient and willing to help!!

• it’s like he could read your mind on what you needed and would just materialize behind you with a drink or an aspirin or something

• and he’d stay in the room with you whenever he could, reading or texting silently

• it was nice having such a caring presence next to you, even if he didn’t chat much

• I mean, the quiet helped you nap more easily too

• and somehow whenever you woke up, he was still there, keeping an eye on you

• if he had to leave for whatever reason he’d gently wake you up to let you know he was headed out and to call him if you need anything

• he makes the healing process peaceful (:

WOOZI

• when he hears the news he’s just. suddenly very very quiet

• like this man is out of it.

• he brushes off the others when they ask what happened, and makes it through the day fairly uneventfully

• when he gets home you almost don’t hear him, only noticing when he shuts the door

• “Jihoon?”

• He beelines straight to you before wrapping you in a huge hug. big tight hug.

• definitely swaying back and forth a little <3

• but you’re just like “woah ok bud what’s up with you”

• and one look at his face says everything

• it’s just been so much: the stress of a comeback, dealing with the managers and the other boys, and then his s/o gets hurt on top of that?

• maybe he needs a break too

• and so you both take one

• I hope you like sleeping lol

• basically you guys take the next few days to recover, just ordering food up and watching shows in silence before falling asleep together on the couch or even the floor once (hey the rug is soft!!!)

• and one day you wake up to find your injury no longer aching

• and the bed is empty next to you

• so you get up and peer down the hallway

• and Jihoon is in the kitchen, playing soft classical music while cutting vegetables

• he notices as you approach, silently offering you a carrot stick

• “I see you’re feeling better too?”

• he nods.

• you both spend the rest of the morning waking up again, cleaning the house and making food, Jihoon’s energy and personality slowly coming back too

• maybe your break wasn’t as much of him taking care of you, but you taking care of each other

• almost as if you’re tied together somehow, your ups and downs mutual

• either way, after that you’re both a lot more aware of the balance and way of recovery you two have

• and you can predict things in advance for next time!

[divinefireangel]

You are my Honey and my Forever Moon

SF9 Inseong x Wife! Reader Fluffy Smut.

ADORABABY ADORABABY ADORABABY ADORABABY ADORABABY ADORABABY

Disclaimer: This is just a work of fiction. If this piece of fan fiction is offensive to any celebrity, fandom or culture please let me know so I can take it down. Also note that this is my version of a character or celeb, which will vary from person to person.

Author's Note: I finally got to finishing this request!! 🥳 Not gonna lie I kinda like this one lol. I have a free day tomorrow so let's hope I post tomorrow as well🤞

Copyright: Please note that this is my work and if you want to publish this on any other platform, take my permission before doing so. Taking an author's work and posting it somewhere else without any intimation is just disrespectful. I readily welcome suggestions and criticisms. That being said, Happy reading! 🤍

Warnings: 18+ ages and female readers (nothing specified with respect to appearance, etc of reader). Tbh all can read it. Soft sex. Unprotected sex (just don't do this unless you want kids). Probably slow burn I'm not sure. Sexy but soft Inseong 😂. Lmk if I need to add more! Italics is flashback.

Requested: YES. By our fav @inseongsfoxybae

Hey, babe Sush 🥰🥰🥰 Can I request something?

Would you mind writing a honeymoon scenario with Seongie? Smuty and with a lot of softness at the same time 👉🏻👈🏻

Oh babe I hope you like it and that this makes your day a lil better 💞❣

1.8k Words

Staring down at your left ring finger, you traced the new golden band that your finger adorned. Smiling, you remember the moment that changed your life forever. Finally, you were each other's happily ever after. How did you get so lucky to have Kim Inseong fall in love with you, you'll never know. But what you do know, is that there is no one in the world whom you can love as much as him.

You remember the look he gave you just before you got wedded, standing opposite you holding your hands in his, that always fit together like a puzzle, the moment in which you knew, there is no one who will love you as much as him. Seeing his love filled expression, reminded you of every single time he looked at you like that. The first time he saw you on your first date, the first time he saw you all glamed up, the first time he saw your natural perfections, the first time he saw you naked, the first time he kissed you, the first time he smiled at you, the first time he smiled because of you, the first time you made him laugh, the first time he saw you laugh, the first time he saw you dance your little happy dance because you got your favourite food, the first time you told him you loved him, the first time you held him when he cried, the first time you let him sleep on top of you after a long day and the first time he realized you were the one he was looking for his entire life.

And since all those firsts, he's looked at you the same way. Because he doesn't know how else to look at you. You, his soulmate, his eternal love, his forever and forevermore.

Gathering the crowd's attention, the officiate began the ceremony.

"Dearly beloved, we are present here, to experience the blessed union of Ms. Y/N L/N and Mr. Kim Inseong. As I start, I have a passage to read, written by me, about falling in love.

When you hear the word falling, it's generally assumed to be a neutral word. No one prefers to fall willingly. But falling in love, is one of the purest ways to use the word falling. Not a single person is scared of falling like this. Falling from a height of course is scary for most." The crowd laughs at this remark. Smiling, the officiate continued.

"Well now really when we go back then to falling in love. And say it's crazy. We don't say rising into love. The moment you enter any kind of human undertaking relationship, you've given yourself up. But this is the most powerful thing that can be done. Surrender, you see. And love, is an act of surrender to another person. I give myself to you.

These two young people standing here, in front of each other, have surrendered themselves to one another, creating a strong bond, and I pray, that it only gets stronger with time." Staring into each other's teary yet love filled eyes, Y/N and Inseong slipped on a band on their ring fingers to indicate their eternal love.

"What are you thinking about my love? " Handing you a glass of champagne, your husband asked you.

"Just..... Us. "

"Us? " He questions chuckling, sitting next to you on the couch in your hotel room, which is rented for your honeymoon.

Humming a yes, you lean in to kiss him. Meeting you halfway, Inseong attached your lips together, as a hand stroked your hair.

"Don't you want to change into your nightwear? " Tilting your head innocently, you looked at your husband in curiosity.

"I kinda have other plans." He said sheepishly grinning at your confused demeanour. Placing the two identical glasses on a table nearby, Inseong grabs your face gently with both his hands, connecting your lips again.

Carefully he moves his hands to your hair, trying to find for things that may hurt you when you laid down on the bed. Removing the U pins from your hairbun, he slowly lets your hair down. Breaking the kiss completely, staring at your with a soft smile, warming your heart, he moves to remove your earrings and other jewelry.

Chewing in anticipation on your bottom lip, you lift your fingers to unbutton the buttons of his dress shirt. This action isn't something foreign to either of you, having done this multiple times before in the past. But this time, today, right now, is just more softer, more intimate.

By the time you finish his dress shirt, he's already pulled down the zipper of your dress.

Admiring you again, he moves his hand to the side of your face, slowly pushing a strand of hair behind your ear.

Moving the same hand to the back of your head, he tilts your head up, engulfing your lips again in a needy kiss. A kiss of this type from him never fails to make you lose balance, lose your sense of presence of mind and makes you aroused enough to close your eyes as a your lower abdomen starts heating up for attention.

Breathing into each other, you stand up taking his hand and pull him towards the bed, stopping at its foot. Slowly you slide off him shirt from his shoulders, letting it fall on the floor. Looking up at him through your lashes, you bite your lower lip, as you feel yourself getting wetter by the minute. How can you not be wet when you have such a sexy husband? Smirking a little, Inseong traces your skin from your neck to your shoulders to your back, gliding your dress down near his shirt. Taking your delicate hands in his, he gazes down your body, the tent forming in his pants approving your pretty lingerie. How did he get so lucky to have found you. You goddess of a being, so in love with him, a mere man who worships you more than anything.

Placing your hands around his neck, he leans down to kiss your lush lips, as his hands go down your body, reaching behind your back to unclasp your bra, and settling on your waist for a moment, before going down to reach the back of your thighs. Lifting you up without breaking the kiss, Inseong kneels on the bed as your legs wrap around him in instinct. Laying you down lovingly on the bed, your husband looks into your eyes, with that sweet look of his. For him although, he feels like he is looking at you for the first time ever, starting from your forehead to the distance between your eyebrows, to your cute nose and to your parted lips, waiting to be kissed again.

Swallowing in the sight below, his lips find themselves at the base of your jaw. Sucking there lightly, Inseong rolls his hips such that his clothed length rubs against your core. Even with so many layers you could feel the outline of his dick. Kissing down till your neck and collarbone, he continues to grind into you, groaning when he feels your nails scratch his back.

Gasping at a sudden forceful thrust, you wrap your legs tighter around his waist. Detaching his lips from your body, he sits on his knees, looking down at your, enjoying the view of you in your loving needy state. Making eye contact, he unbuckles his belt removing it sexily, followed by his pants and boxers. Placing his hands on your bent knees, he moves his torso up as his hands glide freely from your knees through the top of your thighs, coming to a still on your hips.

Leaning down, Inseong kisses your lips again, as his fingertips trace the upper elastic of your panties. Grabbing ahold of them, he peels your panties down your legs and throws it to the side. One of his hands comes next to your head to support himself up as he stays close to you, kissing till you run out of air in your lungs, while the other takes liberty to part your folds.

Sighing into your mouth, he spreads your wetness from your entrance to your clit, giving it a few strokes to stimulate you more. Moaning into the kiss, you silently beg for more, wanting more, more of him in you, taking you to paradise.

Removing his fingers from your folds, he breaks the kiss just to rile you up more by sucking them as his eyes never left yours. Biting your lip you look at him with pleading eyes. Dropping his cockiness at your cuteness, he slowly guides the head of his cock to your entrance, nudging it in little by little, letting you get used to his size. Pecking your forehead repeatedly Inseong bottoms out into you. Stilling for a moment, he takes your hand in his free hand, bringing it up to kiss your knuckles.

Melting at this sweet gesture, you intertwine your fingers together, as your eyes close overwhelmed by the feeling of his cock starting to move back and forth, in and out of you slowly. Petting your hair with the hand that's next to your head, Inseong joins your lips again, but only for a small kiss. He then proceeds to kiss your cheeks, your nose, your eyebrows, your eyelids, your chin, your jaw, your forehead and back to your lips, all while rutting his pelvis against yours in a loving pace.

This isn't the first time he's made love to you. He's done that multiple times and more. But now, you are his wife and he wants nothing but to take care of you and your burdens and to keep you happy. He wants to spoil you in every way possible. He wants you fulfilled to the maximum extent, and he will do anything for you and your future together to be as perfect as possible.

Moaning his name, when you feel yourself coming closer to the edge, you clench your walls around him. Shuddering in response, he increases his pace to help you both have a blissful orgasm. Nuzzling his nose against yours, he squeezes your intertwined fingers looking back up into your eyes, wordlessly conveying that he is close. So so close to you.

"I love you" He whispers roughly, feeling his release approaching.

"I love you too" You gasp as you tighten your legs around him, clenching your walls as you come undone below your lover. Repeating your name as if it's the only word he knows, Inseong comes down slowly from his high, falling on top of you as slowly as he can.

Pressing your foreheads together, you catch your breath, hugging each other. Setting his head in between your shoulder and neck, Inseong starts to feel drowsy. How cute, you think fondly as you wrap your arms securely around you lover, your husband, playing with his hair as he drifts to sleep with you in his arms, and you following him soon after.

[swamp-spirit]

USTATE OF THE WRITING PROJECTS - September 6, 2022

Started this a bit ago to try to keep myself accountable to all my projects despite ADHD project hopping.

You can find all the posted fanfics on my AO3 and all the posted original stuff on Tapas, but here’s what all the unposted projects are. If any of them interest you, please talk to me about them! Engagement is brain food!

Short-Change the Boatman - D.Gray-Man

Summary - The number of people being born with spiritual power isn’t rising with the population, and clandestine organizations across the world are becoming increasingly desperate. The restless dead are quickly outstripping the number of people who can send them on, souls left to fester and warp. Marian Cross may be a professional psychopomp, but she isn’t too worried about the politics. She does her job, and does it well enough to spend her eternal life with all the necessary vices. Mana Walker dies, eaten by the Campbell curse, and it’s fine. Except he had a kid, a kid who can see not just the dead, but the secrets of the living, a kid who a lot of people would love to join their faction. Nea Walker, meanwhile, has been dead for almost a century, but that doesn’t mean he’ll let Allen Walker fall into the hands of people who’d use him, even if that means attempting to raise a kid with Marian Cross

Since I’m Back Into DGM, of course there’s fic. I wanted to do a modern AU adventure focusing on Allen’s apprenticeship with Cross. Hopefully with a sequel about [spoiller noises]

Doomed from the Start - MDZS/Untamed

AU where Jiang Cheng marries over the time skip, but it’s less of a ‘OC insert romance‘ and more of a ‘character study about Jiang Cheng’s relationship to duty and family‘. It’s specifically for two friends of mine who’ve been supporting me as a writer for literal decades, but is being held back by my inability to finish Untamed or the MDZS novels.

Loyal Hearts - Bokura no Kiseki

I love what I have written for this, but no idea where to go next. It’s an AU where Momoka and Teshimano got memories early instead of Minami and [manga spoilers]. It’s a little bit romance (Momoka/Hiroki and Teshimano/Zeze), but also just having fun with a shakeup that leaves a lot of characters a lot more unhinged.

Devil, Tower, Death - MDZS/Untamed

I’ve been jokingly referring to this as my ‘time-travel break-it fic’. It’s one of the fics where a character gets to go back and do everything right, but its Jin Guangyao who A) Wants many bad things B) Is not always moving towards the things he actually wants/needs so instead of solving all the problems, it just makes things weirder. This ones depressing as hell TBH.

Destructive Forces - Original

One of my favorite recent projects. It’s about a girl who was born to be a curse upon the world, but doesn’t actually hate it, and is trying to get through life not slowly poisoning everything she touches. Lots of monster hunting and lesbian romance.

Solar Fields - Original

Born from reading a bunch of isekai and historical novels and feeling frusterated with how often the genre felt like it reinforced the idea that there were Important People (nobles) and everyone else. I always bad for the maids of villains whose lives are tied to a person they could be killed for helping but would also be killed for betraying. The main character lives in a post-apoclyptic America and is the mute personal maid of an energy baron’s daughter. Her mistress is after the hand of the prince, and Amity is just trying to survive the social season.

Signs of Decay - Original

Summary - Amy is a jaded twenty-something, sham exorcist, and flesh hungry monster. Not that she's eaten anyone. She's been raised to be more than a monster. And the second she kills, the same organization that brought her up will put her down. Everything in her life is tracked, from her pulse to her credit card. But Amy is slipping, and she knows it isn't long before she's declared to high risk to live. But when she meets eleven year old Charlie, she realizes the girl's power to channel the dead makes her a target of the same organization that raised Amy.   Well, Amy's seen enough people killed. She's already called dibs on the next execution, and she'll walk to it happily before she lets them hurt Charlie

Deep Dive - Original

Deep Dive follows a journalist who lives with their sister, a passionate gamer. After spending a year working hard to save up for a VR rig to play the big new MMO with her close knit guild, the sister suddenly tosses out the rig and all her games, falling into a deep depression.

Worried for their sister, the MC decides to do their next story on the popular VR world their sister played in. They find out their sister was a member of one of the most respected, powerful guilds, but quit after a member died, something nobody seems willing to talk about.

It’s taking the ‘MMO world‘ story, but trying to focus more on the very human drama actual MMOs get that comes from... lots of humans working together, especially when you can have as many identities as you want.

Arizona* - Original

Cyberpunk disability focused lesbian romance about a model who gets locked out of her own prosthetics and ends up calling in an activist youtuber to help her remove them. It’s a lot about clashing ideals around disability and relationships to your body.

Three Down - Harry Potter

I wrote this in college almost a decade ago and removed it when JKR started getting Real Terfy, but I’d like to repost and finish it someday because it’s a really heavy, personal story for me. It focuses on Remus just after the end of the war trying to come to terms with what’s happened as he works as a librarian in a small village.

American Villain - Boku no Hero Academia

Summary - The world is changing. In two generations, quirks have gone from a feared rarity to a slight majority, and the world is still catching up.

Holly is one of the people lost in the shuffle. At sixteen, she makes good money with her quirk, making untraceable explosives for anyone who can pay.

Working alone keeps her safe, keeps people from knowing how weak her quirk actually is. 

But when she gets in over her head, she’s taken in by people who offer her everything she’s ever wanted: love, family, a chance to build a better life for herself. And all she has to do is become the one thing she swore she’d never be again, somebody else’s weapon.

The other work on here I posted, then unposted, but this one because I got cold feet.

Untitled Isekai*

As he’s dying, a great hero wishes to be free of the crushing weight of being responsible for other’s lives. The spirits of the world attempt to grant each person’s truest dying wish with their reincarnation, but, understanding the hero will always try to help others and up overburdened, give him a life where he has no strength to protect.

Instead of being a hero, he slowly realizes the only way to survive with poor health, no magic, no money, and no social status, is to turn to crime.

[captnjacksparrow]

Okay so I know I’m far off my rocker with what I’m about to say but I have to say it otherwise I’ll forget or keep thinking about it like crazy.

It’s probably just me but I can’t help but feel like SNS aren’t straight. I can’t help but feel like Naruto could possibly be bi with women preference or don’t realize it. I can’t help but feel like Sasuke might be gay or bi. I don’t want to state it as a fact because we don’t know their sexualities canon wise plus I want to respect the author’s creation however I can’t see those two as straight, especially Sasuke. I understand that Sasuke puts his goals before romance and that may be the case for this. I know he wants to defeat his brother and restore his clan, thats his top priority in life. People say he doesn’t know how to express his emotions, yet I see it fine with Naruto. He seems to trust Naruto more than anything and wants to be with Naruto. He turns down girls, mainly Sakura when it comes to affection or flirtatiousness. Now it could be just that those girls see him as a trophy and Sakura doesn’t understand him or respect him, however even after Boruto when he “marries” Sakura, it seems he’s depressed and regrets the relationship. He visits Naruto’s family more than his own and I find it depressing and interesting because it shows he chooses Naruto over his own “wife”. Even with Karin, he cares about her as a comrade or friend yet I don’t feel romantic attraction on his side. Yet I feel a bit of that with him and Naruto. There was a rumor that the author or creator of Naruto that between Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura isn’t a love triangle but rather a circle like a fish biting its own tail. So Naruto —> Sakura —> Sasuke and Sasuke —> Naruto. Anyways, i know this show isn’t about their sexuality and I shouldn’t focus on that but I couldn’t help but notice something or rather feel it. Also, your post on SNS Sasukes pov, I remember you mentioning Sasuke being comfortable enough to show his vulnerability with Naruto and that had me thinking... is this Sasuke accepting his love for Naruto? Is this Sasuke allowing Naruto to open him and save him. It seems Naruto was the first and only person that made his way to his heart, even expanding it just a little.

That’s just me but I would love to hear what you have to say and correct me if I’m wrong. What do you think?

Nice ask @larrycherry04 😍😍

There was a rumor that the author or creator of Naruto that between Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura isn’t a love triangle but rather a circle like a fish biting its own tail. So Naruto —> Sakura —> Sasuke and Sasuke —> Naruto.

Again larry, there is no official proof for this interview. And if it is so, I don’t really believe any of his interviews, tbh. 

These are the two different official interviews from Shounen Jump at different point of time with Kishimoto and two contradicting answers. 

So, when it comes to drawing Manga, Kishi was very truthful. But when it comes to interviews, he started to contradict his own answers. Which makes him a liar, in my opinion and I don’t blame him.

So, In short, Read the manga or Watch the Anime and see how you feel about it and come to a conclusion rather that believing his interviews.

But to answer whether it’s a love circle??? Nope. 

Sakura, like I said before, she is a pairing fodder for Sasuke, most of the time and for Naruto, a little bit. 

If it is a love circle, like, if Naruto truly loved Sakura, he never should’ve let Sasuke off the hook, for all the tantrums/outbursts he has shown towards Sakura not once or twice but multiple times.

Imagine you are Naruto, you love Sakura so much and values her a lot above everyone.

What would you do in the following scene?

I seriously can’t stop laughing here. Here, a boy, your supposed rival, is mildly insulting your most valued person’s tears. What will you do?

You will speak on her behalf, Of course. Just like Naruto did.

But the moment your rival says something to you, you forget everything about Sakura and starts to think about your rival. Wellllll ... So weird!!!!! Which begs the question ‘Do you really love her in the first place???’.

In this scene, the moment he heard those words from Sasuke, Sakura was out of the picture. Important point to note, Naruto still had a crush on Sakura until this point. 

Moment 1

Sakura: I am going to stab Sasuke-Kun

Sasuke : Am gonna kill you too

**Naruto heroically saves her**

Naruto: Sasuke, Sakura was a member of Team 7.

Sasuke: I don’t give a fuck

Naruto: Anyways, I heard the truth about Itachi and what you’ve been doing so far, is understandable, (including trying to kill Sakura)

Sakura: **surprised pikachu face**

Moment 2

Sakura: I love you, Sasuke-Kun

Sasuke: Annoying!! I am gonna put her in a murdering Genjutsu

Naruto: Sasuke, you shouldn’t have put her in such a strong Genjutsu

Sasuke: If I didn’t , she will come in our way

Naruto: Ummm, that’s true. Let’s go fight!!!

This is the pattern of Team 7 dynamics even until the very end. And I don’t see a love circle at all. 

To put it bluntly,

These words from Naruto is an admonition to Sakura, that is, ‘Whatever happens between us, do not meddle!!’

Sakura is just a third wheel to elevate the relationship between Naruto and Sasuke. Naruto likes her but not more than Sasuke. Naruto will die for Sasuke but not for Sakura. Sasuke will put his life on the line for Naruto but not for Sakura. 

He turns down girls, mainly Sakura when it comes to affection or flirtatiousness. Now it could be just that those girls see him as a trophy and Sakura doesn’t understand him or respect him, however even after Boruto when he “marries” Sakura, it seems he’s depressed and regrets the relationship. He visits Naruto’s family more than his own and I find it depressing and interesting because it shows he chooses Naruto over his own “wife”. Even with Karin, he cares about her as a comrade or friend yet I don’t feel romantic attraction on his side.

Sasuke closed all his walls in his heart to let anyone in, after the massacre. And even before that incident, it was never shown that he had any friends or rather he was frustrated with those boys revering him because of the ‘Uchiha’ name he bears. Uchiha is the powerful clan of Konoha and so everyone has high level of expectations. So, there is that. 

Sasuke was thoroughly frustrated at this comment because nobody is seeing him as a boy named ‘Sasuke’ in his Academy. Even his homeroom teacher saw him as 'Itachi's little brother'. He was clearly facing an identity problem during this time, even in his home. Because Fugaku, Sasuke’s father completely ignored Sasuke and was showing his full attention towards his brother Itachi. When it comes to girls, I don’t have to say anything. They treated him like a trophy. Meaning, Everybody was expecting something from him but nobody was trying to befriend him unconditionally or approach him for who he was. 

This was explained nicely by Itachi in Itachi Shinden novel.

I wish this scene were in the Anime series. Such a warm one.

He was turning down all those girls, because like you said, they just see him as a cool boy who can do anything. And Sakura was one among them. 

If Sasuke looked like Rock Lee, would Sakura have flirted with him??? Absolutely not. 

And to play romance, there should be certain effort from Sasuke’s side, like going for dates or whatever shit, which he was never ready for. Most of all, there should be a reason when you start a relationship. Sakura never tried to reach him in a deeper level and tried to understand his sufferings and hence there were no reason. This is the case even after their marriage. Does she know about Uchiha Clan massacre's reason? Or Itachi? If she had known, she should've educated her daughter and stopped wearing that fucking clan crest on their back. And most of all, what could Sasuke talk with her if she doesn't know a single thing about him?? Their relationship was built on Editorial pressure, regrets and shallowness. Of course, If I were Sasuke, I would avoid my family by staying in my office more.

With Karin, their relationship was purely business 'I use you, you use me' kind. He was very clear about that when he formed 'Team Hebi'.

He helped Suigetsu to get Zabuza's sword and in turn Sasuke wants him to help with his goal. Same with Karin & Jugo. But it seems Sasuke respected her a lot in terms of her strength. Karin was similar to Sakura when it comes to flirting but when it comes to work she means business and can offer Sasuke a lot in terms of Chakra replenishment or sensing enemies plan while battling. That's why he treated her better than Sakura but that's all there is to it. It never went anywhere because Karin knows nothing about him. And Sasuke was not interested in forming a bond with any of Team Taka members either.

In other words, to evolve from a friendship to romance, it takes a massive effort from both sides in terms of understanding. Like I said before, Sasuke built a strong wall around his heart and he never let anyone in it as he saw it as a weakness. Sakura barely made a scratch on that wall. Just for becoming a friend takes a big effort to break that wall. How much effort do you think it takes for romance?? Instead of becoming his friend first, Sakura jumped straight into romance, which makes Sasuke uncomfortable most of the times. Hence the depressed reaction you see in Boruto.

Even with Karin, he cares about her as a comrade or friend yet I don’t feel romantic attraction on his side. Yet I feel a bit of that with him and Naruto.

Hmmm, I don't see Sasuke having a romantic attraction with Naruto. Romantic attraction leans towards sexual desire. But, Sasuke has more of a childlike attraction which leans towards purity and innocence, like more of a desire to be near Naruto, will never be bored even if it was for eternity and would like to look after his safety without expecting anything back.

I've seen this quite a few times.

Sasuke is not competing here, otherwise he would have walked ahead Naruto. He just wants to walk along side him.

This is that dream sequence after their fight. Sasuke, just like before, approaches Naruto by himself and listens to him intently. I am pretty sure he could do this for a whole day and still would not leave him.

LOL. Sasuke, at this moment, doesn’t gives two shit about the world. Meaning he is not missing anyone from there. The person he really wants to be with is right next to him. He even convinces Naruto that Kakashi and Sakura will do something and he doesn’t have to worry. However the moment Naruto leaves, he worries and looks around for him. 

This is what I called, an innocent attraction and the desire to be around the person you feel warm and comfortable. 

But every possibility of changing this into romance is already there. Because Naruto broke his wall long back and has a high place in his heart. A strong friendship with an innocent attraction is all there. If someday Kishi comes out and said 'Sasuke loved Naruto', I won't be surprised at all.

Sasuke being comfortable enough to show his vulnerability with Naruto and that had me thinking... is this Sasuke accepting his love for Naruto? Is this Sasuke allowing Naruto to open him and save him. It seems Naruto was the first and only person that made his way to his heart, even expanding it just a little.

I think Sasuke started to like Naruto unknowingly ever since he started to watch him secretly. Because it always makes him feel warm and fuzzy. 

But, the scars left by Itachi made Sasuke feel that having people around will always makes him weak. Meaning, The more people you love and when you lose them, you will feel weak. Hence, he was very hesitant to reach Naruto. Slowly but surely, Naruto was already making his way into Sasuke’s heart. And once they were put in the same team, he just loved Naruto unconditionally. That’s why he almost gave his life for him.

But Once Sasuke decided to leave the village, he severed all the ties with Konoha, including Kakashi and Sakura. The level of bond Sasuke had with them can be cut off by saying ‘Thank you’. But with Naruto, it takes more than that. Because for Sasuke, Naruto’s existence itself is making him weak by bringing back all the feelings he once had for him. Like Orochimaru said, Naruto has certain power to influence Sasuke’s heart. So Sasuke decided to kill him but in the end he simply couldn’t. 

Everytime Sasuke strays off the path, Naruto will always appear and remind him that he is his friend

Every time Naruto appears and talks to him, Sasuke’s heart was changing but he simply doesn’t want that and he hates that feeling. Which was why he wants to destroy Naruto and whatever he represents. What Naruto represents is a powerful bond between Sasuke and Naruto.

In the final fight, he simply couldn’t cut that bond even though he had a chance to kill. These bipolar battles are what he was fighting all along internally. And finally accepts that he lost and was happy for it. Those words, ‘I lost’ meant he lost the fight physically and mentally he had with Naruto and was ready to totally embrace the feelings he already had.  

It’s not Naruto who was expanding Sasuke’s heart a little, Sasuke already gave a wide berth for Naruto and one day decided to close it. In the end, he couldn’t. 

I can’t help but feel like Naruto could possibly be bi with women preference or don’t realize it. I can’t help but feel like Sasuke might be gay or bi. I don’t want to state it as a fact because we don’t know their sexualities canon wise plus I want to respect the author’s creation however I can’t see those two as straight, especially Sasuke.

As for their sexualities, I seriously could not conclude anything. But from the way Naruto behaves, he certainly looks like a closeted bisexual just like Kishimoto. And Kishi was not hold his guns in this aspect at all, he went all out in the Manga chapter 347. 

I mean it was evident from the way he casted Multiple Reverse Harem no jutsu before Kaguya without any reaction but when Konohamaru did the same Jutsu with Sai and Sasuke, he looked visibly disgusted.

Why to react extremely when Konohamaru is doing the same as you? Probably he doesnt like Sasuke in this jutsu I guess. LOL.

When asked about that ‘accidental’ kiss again, he reacts visibly disgusted but at the same time with a Nosebleed. This screams ‘Closet bisexual’ to me.

As for Sasuke, I simply see him as close to Asexual and possibly demisexual for Naruto.

Why Asexual?

Because Kishi purposefully made Sasuke to be in certain awkward scenes and on top of it, he painted an over sexualized aura all over him, in part II of the manga. It was evident from his bare chested costumes and the way characters like Karin behaves around him. In the same chapter 347, Kishi went all out for Sasuke too.

I don’t even know why Kishi made this scene. But it certainly shows Sasuke wasn’t bothered by a naked man at all unlike Naruto who acted disgusted.

I simply cannot see Sasuke will be romantically attracted to someone if they cannot form a strong bond with him. And to form that kind of bond is not an easy task. But even for a demisexual, there will be a preference. and his preference were not any of those girls especially Sakura. So, I can safely say, if he ever wants to be romantic, all the possibilities points towards Naruto. Because of certain obsession he has towards Naruto throughout the War arc.  

Believe me, Obsession comes from two ways. You will be obsessed on someone whom you hate to your bone because of what they did to you. Most possibly, a hard betrayal. Or, You will be obsessed on someone who you love above yourself. 

Itachi falls under the first category (that’s why when Sasuke was told Itachi was good all along, he couldn’t accept the fact that he hated him for wrong reasons and he snapped and went onto a killing spree because of that obsession. Even though he was sane after losing his parents) and Naruto falls in the later.

Like he was basically saying ‘Naruto is my person. Only I can kill him, he is not yours’ to Obito when he was trying to kill Naruto. And where did these obsession comes from provided Naruto never betrayed him in any which ways? Because of all the past he had with him and he was already in love but was trying to deny it.

Anyways at the end of the day, I don’t mind their sexualities at all. What matters is how they prioritizes each other at any given situations without an ounce of regrets. Because, like I always say, their bond transcends way beyond Marriage, Children and Sex. 

Hope my answer helps :-)

[newtonsheffield]

so after all this chat about Mary & Mary - any thoughts on interactions of the two? Mary finding out the name of the new baby? I tried scrolling through to see whether you have talked about that but couldn’t find anything so sorry if I missed something!! eternally grateful for all the entertainment you provide!

Oh Heyyyyy! 

Oh the Marys. As we know, I think Mary Sheffield is truly the most wonderful human being, a beautiful rule breaking moth. And when I imagine her sitting with Kate’s children just being genuinely proud when they call her Grandma Mary? Yah. I certainly feel more than a little emosh. 

So, I have spoken briefly on how little Mary came to have her name here as well as her nickname Marjorie here and I certainly don’t blame you fr not beig able to find them, this tag is a disaster tbh. 

But here’s a little more on Mary Sheffield + Little Mary Bridgerton

Mary Sheffield was a little embarrassed to admit in later years that while she’d been thrilled for Kate when she’d announced her first pregnancy, she had been a little nervous about the role she’d have in the life of this baby, and any others Kate may have. And while she couldn’t feel anymore Kate’s mother, Kate had never called her Mum nor had Mary asked her though Mary had often heard Anthony and his family refer to herself as Kate’s mother and Kate never corrected them. But when Mary had first walked into the hospital room and found Kate smiling brightly at her husband a tiny baby in her arms who already looked so much like Anthony, and Edwina made a choked little cooing noise as she rushed to the bedside Mary held back, still a little unsure, and then Kate uttered the words she had months ago now, and never again until Mary was sure she’d imagined them altogether: Edmund, Grandma Mary’s here to meet you. And they never seemed to lose their shine. 

When Mary had had a frantic call from her son-in-law only a few hours after she’d had a message that read Kate’s Anthony: Kate’s having the baby!!! Pics to follow!!!!  Panic had gripped her. His voice had choked out Umm Mary, do you think you could come to the hospital? I just... ahh... And he hadn’t seemed to be able to get out the rest of the words. And when she’d arrived and found Anthony, tears rolling down his face, a tiny baby clutched in his arms her heart had broken for this man that most people found so intimidating but at his heart was sweet and kind, and loved his family with a single minded determination. And she’d held him while he cried, refusing to let her own tears fall despite her panic because Kate was not going to die, of that she was sure. This beautiful child would not grow up without her mother. She’s beautiful Anthony. Mary said gently, and Anthony seemed to shake himself, staring down at his daughter a soft smile on his face What’s her name? Anthony sighed his voice shaking I hadn’t thought about it, it’s my turn again he said gently. And Mary smiled as the baby yawned her eyes opening slightly, her breath catching as she recognised Kate’s eyes, right next to Anthony’s nose. And hours later when Kate is safe and sleeping gently she barely holds it together as Anthony whispers This one is Mary. And when Kate wakes up and Anthony gently says the name he’s picked out Mary Lucy Bridgerton and Kate smiles widely despite everything, Mary can’t.

Mary can barely keep the pride out of her voice when Mrs Johnson stops Kate and Anthony as they leave her house weeks later with a Katie Sheffield I hope you weren’t going to leave without showing me that new baby! And Kate laughed and said I wouldn’t dream of it. Plucking baby Mary from her carseat and depositing her in their neighbours arms, the neighbour who’s watched her grow up. Well isn’t she just beautiful little...? And Mary cuts in before Kate can Mary! Mrs Johnson smiles and says Very fitting and Mary Sheffield has to duck back inside when Kate grins happily and says I think so. 

And Mary Bridgerton grows into a child anyone would be proud to call their grandchild (All of Kate and Edwina’s children do of course) Grandma Mary! Mary’s little voice calls from the kitchen and Mary can hear Charlotte’s voice hissing angrily as she rounds the corner Charli won’t stop calling me Marjorie! Mary could hardly bite back her smile. You two are just like your Mummy and Auntie Eddie and Charli and Mary give her nearly identical sceptical looks, so much like the Kate she remembers when she’d first married her father that her heart clenches Mummy and Auntie Eddie are best friends Charli said as though she was explaining something very simple to someone a little dense You two will be one day as well. Little Mary lets out a little scoff and Charli rolls her eyes I doubt it, Marge is too stupid for me to be friends with And Mary has to catch an orange from hitting her other granddaughter in the head. And Mary has to do her best to keep a straight face when she tells Kate about it later  

[bookish-mind]

I read call down the hawk, here’s my aching heart:

*spoilers*

(I wasn’t planning on making a long post about this book but I couldn’t help myself, I had too much to say and I needed a place to scream about pynch)

“This is going to be a story about the Lynch brothers” I knew that already so why am I crying, already, the first line and I’m crying

It mentioned Ronan living somewhere other than the barns after Niall died and I’m just here like,, you can say Monmouth it’s ok

“Adam Parrish was the destination of this road trip” and “Ronan missed him like a lung” my heart my heart my heart

“the guy he loved” PLEASE

Ronan Lynch upon seeing Adam Parrish for the first time: *literally prays*

I see the obsession with Adam’s hands goes way back

“Funny how quickly a handful of weeks could render something unrecognizable” I know ronan was talking about the weather/the campus but my stomach dropped pls this better not be pynch foreshadowing

Their reunion was so chaotic I’d expect nothing else tbh

The watch keeps track of Ronan’s time zone I can’t-

“He was with Adam, and Adam still loved him” PLS THE USE OF THE L WORD KILLS ME EVERY TIME

“there was burnished Gansey, who might not have saved Ronan’s life in high school, but at the very least kept it mostly out of Ronan’s reach so that he could not take it down and break it” this line bothers me bc gansey literally did save Ronan’s life that was the whole godamn point 🙃

Objectively I understand that the crying club are probly decent ppl but subjectively they ain’t no gangsey that’s for sure

“he longed for him even while holding him” pls the yearning,, it’s too much for my frail heart

Bryde needs to gtfo of Ronan’s head is what need to happen

Who is lindenmere I only know Cabeswater

Ronan is crying I’m crying we’re all crying

It breaks my heart that Ronan is still yearning for something more while the rest of the gangsey are out there living

Gansey is chained to a tree in Oregon, seems legit

Chainsaw knows how to say “Atom” I’m fucking crying

“What, Declan? I’m trying to fucking tow a cow” I love this book

Matthew be like “I’ve been staring at the edge of the water long as I can remember never really knowing why”

I literally had a headcanon that Ronan says I love u to Adam in Latin

“He sucked in more longing with every inhale, he exhaled some of his happiness on the other side” this godamn book I swear 😩

“dreamt of you” AGSHSJAK

Oof I kinda love Parsifal all he wants to do is eat some bienenstich made by his momma

Wait wait wait these Niall and aurora doppelgängers are confusing me

“I saved your life because I love you” HE SAID IT OUT LOUD ! HE SAID IT ! IT HAS BEEN SAID

I know it’s common knowledge at this point that they are in an established loving relationship but it hits me the same every time I’m reminded

“It was possible no two students at aglionby had ever come away with such a thorough understanding of Latin (or, possibly, of each other)” I have no words

Declan Lynch falling in love with a dream? More likely than you’d think

Man I hope at the end of all this Declan gets to punch a judge and go somewhere to live and breathe art for the rest of his life

This whole dreamers are born to die young theme is stressing me out

“Ronan, I know you” literally everything they say to each other knocks the air out of my lungs

“They hugged again, merrily, waltzing messily in the kitchen, and kissed, merrily, waltzing more” brb if you need me I’ll be reading this line over and over again for the rest of eternity

Two things: 1) gansey left his mint plant for Ronan to take care of 2) ronan dreamed a literal sun to keep the plant alive when he could have just as easily put it by a window like a normal person that’s the cutest bro shit I’ve ever seen

“Adam stopped breathing” please stiefvater imagine how tired we are

Also where tf is opal I miss the lil weirdo

“he missed him acutely even as he was looking at him” it’s too much,, it’s all too much

Oh hell ya Ronan and Jordan/Hennessy/all the other girls finally met I been waiting for this one

Waaait is the dark lady seashore niall’s dream space like Cabeswater/lindenmere is Ronan’s ??

Oh Matthew, my sweet boy, he figured out he’s a dream

Jordan. Is. Painting. Declan. I. Can’t. Breathe.

Oh damn ok so the lace is trynna get out and destroy the world ? Is that it ?

Matthew asking “Do I have a soul?” broke me

Matthew said “I’m the fake brother” and Declan uno reversed that shit so fast

Alright lindenmere I see you I see you but the thing is.. I miss my girl Cabeswater

OPAL FINALLY

“He didn’t have it in him to love another dream. It hurt too bad. Loving anything did” ouch :(

Fuck fuck fuck this is the part where chaos erupts

Damn those sundogs are cool af tho

I swear I didn’t breathe until I knew Matthew and Declan were alive holy shit

Declan thinking “The world was broken” and “I never actually lived” </3

Let Ronan and Declan hug each other challenge

Adam Parrish please pick up the goddamn phone I am begging you

The way Hennessy is so in awe that Ronan has complete trust of lindenmere/his subconscious made me ache bc it took a helluva lot for him to get to this point

“Hennessy?” “Lynch.” “I’ve been alone a long time” excuse me I’m gonna need a minute-

The way Ronan describes what the lace is to him,, I’m fucking sobbing

Hennessy and Ronan’s swords are badass

I still don’t trust bryde but he got them out of there so points to him I guess :/

Where’s book 2 I need book 2

[fangirlandiknowit101]

30 BTS writer asks: 1, 12 + 18? ❤️🌻

Almost forgot to add - thanks for asking<33333

1. What was the first fandom and/or pairing that you wrote fic for?

Unsurprisingly, it was for Naruto and Sasuke/Naruto. You can still read it in all its glory, even on ao3 lmao. Might be hard to believe but that fic (Unsuspicious title, don't ask why it's called that I have no explanations) is really the absolute first thing I wrote that counts as a fanfic. I didn't write about other people's fictional characters before that. I didn't really write much outside of school at all, not sure how I lived my life tbh...

12. Is there a trope you haven’t written yet but really want to?

I answered earlier that I want to write a horse rider au at some point, but what I'd also like is to write a real enemies to lovers fic. Like, actual enemies. But it might be too angsty, so who knows if I'll ever make it lol.

18. What is a line/scene you’re really proud of? Give us the DVD commentary for that scene.

Aah you guys really want that commentary don't you... maybe one day I'll release a version of tswm with director's commentary for the whole thing hahahahaha (jk I'd never have time to do that)

But alright, I'm gonna take the opportunity to comment on another scene in tswm that I definitely this deserves it, it's the reunion scene between Naruto and Sasuke in chapter 49! I hesitated to pick this one bc it's so long and emotional, and also I don't want to add any accidental spoilers... but oh well. Here we go!

[My comments will be in bold text, this starts almost at the beginning of the chapter, right when Sasuke meets Naruto in Kaguya's place.]

He reached out with a hand, the bright light reflecting in the half-moon in his palm. It glowed, and just like that, his hand wrapped around another’s.

Naruto.

He sucked in a breath, lungs desperate for air. Naruto stood before him, chest heaving, hand clutching Sasuke’s so hard he feared it might break.

Their shared beat rang loud in his ears, eyes wide as they drank each other in. The darkness had given way to white, fuzzy light, their bodies floating, suspended in air.

“Sasuke,” Naruto whispered, as if afraid to drown out the sound of their connection.

Honestly, I tried my best to make it as painful as possible. That's all I wanted lol. At first I had no idea how to write this scene, but then I just got a feeling and tried to write it in words.

There was no hiding in this place. It was similar to that strange place that seemed to exist between them when they fought, blows connecting, hearts open. Between one breath and the next, it would be gone, their shared hearts lingering long after.

Nothing more poetic than that special place Kishimoto created for them when they exchange blows... extremely gay.

Here, there was only the two of them, the heat of their bodies as Naruto reached for his face.

“Am I dreaming?” Naruto wondered, fingers stroking along Sasuke’s cheekbone. “You look so real…”

They sank down, slowly, until their feet touched solid white. He shivered, the tips of Naruto’s fingers touching his chin, his mouth.

“It could be a dream,” Sasuke said quietly, exhaling as Naruto came closer.

“I can feel your heart,” Naruto murmured, his forehead coming to rest against Sasuke’s temple. “I missed you so much.”

Images flashed before Sasuke’s eyes, impressions of the world from Naruto’s perspective. Menma as the kyuubi. Kakashi, entering through a window. Iruka, hand gentle as he reached over the table.

Sakura, pain drawing her face tight. A mountain of paperwork. Snippets of conversation. The overwhelming pain of loneliness, like walls closing in on him.

He puzzled together enough pieces to make sense of the days since they separated.

Must be convenient to just read each other's minds... I should stop making fun of my own writing. But anyway, I felt very clever when I realized I could skip explanations between them and just let them see each other's memories of the past few days. I think it fits that they could see it through the other person's eyes, all the emotions too. Especially how painful it was for Naruto and how much he was trying to keep it together in front of his friends, and still failing. It gives Sasuke a better understanding of what would have happened if he'd decided to leave after one year passed (and I'm still bitter at Kishimoto for doing that in canon.)

“Naruto,” he sighed, lifting a hand to sift through soft strands of hair, closing his eyes as Naruto pressed into him.

Hearts bared, he felt Naruto’s desperate longing as his own. It mirrored his own pain, the aching emptiness filling his chest. Little by little, the cold was pushed away by warmth, Naruto’s mouth touching his cheek, his jaw, his throat. It burned against his skin, each point of contact erupting into tendrils of heat that seeped into his body.

“I didn’t know what to do,” Naruto confessed, lips shaping the words onto Sasuke’s throat. “I couldn’t go back to you, I-“

Sasuke turned his head, capturing his mouth. The words were lost between their lips, swallowed by the sudden surge of need. Naruto’s arm wrapped around his neck, keeping him in place. A fever caught him, leaving him dizzy and faint. He felt emotions between them like a physical caress, like they swirled in and out of their bodies, like a strong wind playing with fallen leaves.

Pain. Longing. Fear.

Happiness. Comfort. Love.

Naruto kissed him like he’d die if they stopped. He might, for all Sasuke knew.

Don't mind me, I was just crying buckets as I wrote this.

Their hands were still clasped tight, their palms pressed together, keeping their marks in contact. Teeth dug into his lower lip, but he could barely feel the pain over the onslaught of emotion. It was overwhelming, to share Naruto’s heart so fully. Was this how Naruto had felt, when Sasuke had touched him by accident? When Sasuke had shared too much of himself, and Naruto had been unable to give him the same in return.

I think it actually wasn't as overwhelming for Naruto when Sasuke accidentally touched him. This place that Kaguya controls just amplifies things a lot.

No such restraints now.

Their souls were on fire, like chakra flames billowing around their bodies. It was too much to make sense of, and yet it felt as if they’d always been this close, always been one and the same. Naruto fit inside him like a key, like Sasuke was now unlocked, his body no longer keeping him prisoner.

“Naruto,” he breathed out, over and over again, every nerve ending alight as they held each other.

I was listening to this song called Heat Up by Giant Rooks as I wrote this (that's where the chapter title comes from and honestly the lyrics are just *chef's kiss*) and I really tried to use as much metaphor as I could, idk if that makes it sound boring haha but for once I was definitely thinking very hard about every single sentence. And I tried to make it as "alive" as I could, so you'd feel it rather than have it described to you.

An eternity later they calmed down, mouths sliding lazily over each other, heartbeats finally finding their shared rhythm. Their foreheads pressed together, Sasuke’s eyes fluttering open to meet deep blue, their usual strength faded into self-doubt.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, running his fingers through Naruto’s hair, thumb tracing the shell of his ear. “Don’t hide from me, not here.”

Aww look at Sasuke, so in tune with his emotions. He really is an all or nothing kind of guy. If they already share everything in this place, there's no point in having secrets. Besides, his worst fear is Naruto losing confidence because of something he said or did.

Naruto let out a sharp breath, lifting their clasped hands between their chests.

“I missed you,” he said again, eyes closing in pain. “I’m so happy you’ve been okay.”

So much pain. Sasuke struggled to make sense of it, so much of it reflected inwards, towards Naruto himself. He could understand the longing, the absence of him like a gaping hole. It mirrored his own pain, pain he’d locked inside his heart within a steel cage. It flowed freely now, wrapping around Naruto’s in recognition.

But the rest… Naruto let out a sob, and yet he was smiling. Sasuke pressed another kiss to his lips, unsure of what to say.

I know Naruto did that whole waterfall thing where he embraced his evil side and totally let go of all his negative energy... But you can't tell me he's 100% okay and only happy and never feels pain. When will Konoha start offering therapy... Jokes aside, at this moment in time Naruto is so conflicted. The whole time he's been worried about Sasuke leaving him, and telling himself that Sasuke would be happier in the other dimension, and that logically he should let Sasuke stay, but he absolutely doesn't want Sasuke to leave him. It's the most selfish thing he's ever felt, I think, this need to have Sasuke by his side. And he's got so much on his shoulders, just piling up, everyone relying on him to somehow magically fix the world. And he's afraid of failing, of acknowledging to himself that there are parts of him that aren't ready to shoulder this burden, that he's still hurting, that there's still a part of him that could have become like Menma. He's supposed to be completely selfless but he isn't, and he thinks of that as a character flaw, a personal failure. And that's kind of where his resolution to not become hokage comes from. Because he doesn't think he can remove this selfish parts of him, and so maybe he should embrace them instead.

“Sasuke, it’s so strange…” Naruto started, his words slow, carefully chosen. “You understand Charasuke so well, but Menma… I can’t accept him. And now I realize, he shows the ugliest parts of me. The parts that I’m afraid of.”

They both leaned back a little, to see each other’s faces. Light played over Naruto’s features, blurring him at the edges. Sasuke cupped his cheek, tilting his chin up so that their eyes met. Now that he knew what to look for, he could feel Naruto’s fear.

“It’s always there,” Naruto confessed, raw honesty in his voice. “The fear of losing you. The fear of not being strong enough. The fear of becoming hokage, and failing.”

Sasuke opened his mouth to say something, to reassure him, but Naruto shook his head quickly.

Sasuke, on the other hand, he never held himself up to be a good person. He's well aware that he has weaknesses, that he's putting up walls so he won't have to deal with emotions and stuff. But he does believe (a bit blindly) in Naruto, I think. Even though he thinks Naruto won't succeed, it's not because of anything that Naruto does or fails to do. He thinks it's because the world won't follow him, that Konoha isn't capable of change. But he never thought that Naruto would actually give up or have these kinds of doubts.

“Let me say this. I didn’t understand it at first. Menma always rubbed me the wrong way. I know you don’t like him either, but for me… It’s like looking at myself and knowing I gave up.”

He drew in a deep breath, his fingers trembling around Sasuke’s.

“And now, here, I can’t avoid that fear. Because all of it… all of it is for you, Sasuke.” He swallowed, and through the fear, Sasuke saw his determination. “You asked me, if there’s any room in my head for anyone but you. And there isn’t.”

Naruto's brain is 99% Sasuke and 1% ramen, that's just fact. That aside, this might be one of my favorite quotes in the fic.

Frowning, Sasuke bit the inside of his cheek to stay silent. Naruto was working up to something, he could tell, and part of him couldn’t help but think it would end the two of them.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Naruto said, drawing the pad of his thumb over Sasuke’s eyebrow, the touch equal parts reassuring and painful. “I can hear your thoughts, you know. Do you really believe that I would choose anything else over you?”

A lie caught on Sasuke’s tongue. He didn’t want to believe it, but what place did he have by Naruto’s side? How could he be all that Naruto wanted him, needed him, to be? How could he be someone that others would accept walking by his side?

Oh, Sasuke. Always so ready for Naruto to cast him aside. He doesn't want to stand in the way of Naruto's dreams *wipes tear*

“I don’t believe that you would want to,” he replied, eventually. “But maybe you should.”

They stood for a long time, looking at each other. Sasuke felt torn in two directions. He wanted to tell Naruto to never leave him. He wanted to say that he’d accept anything. That he’d remove himself from Naruto’s presence to make the choice for him. That he couldn’t, wouldn’t, stand between Naruto and his dreams.

That he’d known, all along, that the other dimension was only a dream. An impossibility. That he accepted this, and wouldn’t resent Naruto for choosing the village over him.

I think the difference between Naruto and Sasuke here, is that even though they both think the other should maybe leave them for better things, Naruto is much less ready to actually give Sasuke up. Sasuke is more of the martyr type lol.

“You deserve me,” Naruto said, voice dark with conviction. “Don’t you dare think otherwise. Don’t you understand? If you saw what I’ve been doing the past days…”

Naruto lifted their joined hands higher, shifted his grip until he held Sasuke’s palm open in front of himself.

“I thought only of you. I cared only about you. What good is the village to me, if you’re not there?”

His heart felt too heavy in his chest. Naruto’s words rang through his ears, the implication behind them ensnaring his heart until Naruto held it in his hand, too.

“I don’t want any of it, if you’re not with me.”

Sasuke lowered his eyes. He couldn’t allow himself to give in. He’d already given so much, and although he knew that Naruto would have this, too, it was too much in this moment.

“Sasuke… When are you going to recognize that you’re a good person? That even if our relationship hadn’t changed like this, I’d still need you beside me?”

I wanted to write this part so badly... To make Naruto tell Sasuke that he's a good person. That Naruto thinks so, at least. It's one of the first things I thought of for this scene. Not that Sasuke agrees haha.

“Me, a good person?” Sasuke raised his eyebrows, meeting Naruto’s gaze again. He recognized the stubborn glint in Naruto’s eyes, and sighed. “Even if that was true, you’re smart enough to know it’s not enough.”

Slowly, Naruto pulled his hand closer, his grip turning gentle. Sasuke caught himself holding his breath, as Naruto’s lips connected with the mark on his palm.

“You still don’t understand,” Naruto murmured, the movement of his lips tickling Sasuke’s skin. “The past few days, what have you been doing? Caring for the children, when I wasn’t there to do it. Putting Charasuke before yourself, comforting him in the ways he needed you to. Holding yourself together. Trusting me to come back.”

This is where we acknowledge exactly how much Sasuke has changed. Naruto spent the days apart thinking only of Sasuke, even to the point where he was neglecting his friends and duties. Sasuke, on the other hand, stepped up to fill the role he thought Naruto left behind, hiding his pain behind helping others. Ultimately trusting Naruto to hold his promise to come back. Also, I just want them to be soft with each other T_T

Staring at him, Sasuke’s breath caught in his chest at the swell of pride Naruto felt for him. Was it true, that he had changed so much? In Naruto’s eyes, he had. It was startling, to realize how Naruto thought of him. But Naruto had changed too, he thought. They had grown closer, in a way he didn’t think they could have in their own Konoha.

“I think Charasuke is a bit like you,” Sasuke said, lips twitching upwards at Naruto’s affronted look. “He needs physical comfort. I don’t mind giving it to you, and I guess I don’t mind giving it to him either. You both tend to do whatever you feel like, anyway.”

“You used to mind.” Naruto looked serious, reaching out to touch Sasuke’s mouth as if to prove his point. “Suddenly, you didn’t.”

The smile slipped from Sasuke’s lips. Naruto was right. A few weeks ago, he did push Charasuke out of the window. To be fair, Charasuke hadn’t liked him much back then, either, and the circumstances had been very different. He did understand him better now. If Menma represented Naruto’s fears, Charasuke represented everything Sasuke wanted in life. But Charasuke didn’t have Naruto, didn’t have Menma with him either, and maybe that was why Sasuke wanted to be there for him. His connection with Naruto was precious to him, had kept him going, had kept him questioning himself even in his worst moments of darkness. Had given him a reason not to give up on a life that wasn’t filled with pain and hatred.

Naruto made it worth it to change. Was he hoping to help Charasuke change, too?

Spoiler alert... yes you were, Sas.

Perhaps Kaguya had something to do with it, but maybe, even without her influence, he would have reached this point anyway if given enough time. Time they didn’t have back home. It surprised him to realize that Naruto had thought of this already. That he felt selfish for wanting Sasuke to go back with him, when he knew it would be painful.

“You minded when I touched you, too,” Naruto added, as a reminder that they were talking about the two of them.

“I didn’t.” It was easy to confess. “I couldn’t allow myself to accept it, but I never minded. And now…”

Even if Naruto could read most of his thoughts in this space, it was difficult to say the words.

“I was afraid to have more of you. I still am.  Because I know they’ll never accept it.”

Sasuke vs homophobia :( Can't really kill that with a sword. Sasuke was definitely in love with him before they went to the RTN dimension, he'd just buried it so deep that he had no idea it was there or what it was. If you separate love from attraction it's not really gay, is it? (It is)

Naruto kissed him again, desperately. There were so many thoughts swirling between them, a mess of images and emotions overshadowed by the overwhelming fear of losing each other.

Naruto’s guilt, for not being able to reach Menma like Sasuke reached Charasuke. Their worry for each other. The frustration of being forced to wait. Sasuke’s slow realization of how much Naruto meant to him. How much his family meant to him, even a different version of them.

“I can’t be without you again,” Naruto said, swallowing thickly. “There’s so much I want to say and I don’t know how.”

“I’m here,” Sasuke promised. “Any way you want me to be.”

Even though it hurt, knowing the struggle that lay ahead of them, how Naruto had struggled only the past few days.

He wasn’t sure when he’d closed his eyes, but Naruto’s hands holding his face between them made him open them again. His expression was serious, almost solemn.

“I think you’d be happier if you stayed there,” Naruto whispered, searching his eyes. “You can’t deny it. I know they’d take care of you, and I can tell that your bond with your family is important to you. In a different way than ours, but still. I’d forgive you, if you chose them.”

Stop sacrificing yourself, Naruto. I don't like it.

“How could you say that?” Sasuke grabbed Naruto’s wrists, glaring at him. “Even after everything you said about how you can’t be without me, how you’d never choose anything over me, and you still think I would leave you? Even when you can feel my heart, you think I won’t choose you no matter what?”

Sasuke calling him out, as he should.

He knocked their foreheads together, tightening his grip.

“You think I’d choose happiness over you?”

How could he be happy, if Naruto wasn’t there with him? It wasn’t even an option. He cared about Charasuke, that was true. And the other version of Itachi, of Shisui, his family… Even the Sakura of that world. But how could they compare? Losing Charasuke would hurt, but it wouldn’t rip his soul apart. Staying with them would be a life, but it wouldn’t be living. How could Naruto think of himself as selfish, and still be so incredibly selfless when it came to Sasuke? What was he supposed to do, to make Naruto trust him once and for all?

“If I deserve you, why wouldn’t you deserve me in turn?”

Naruto didn’t have an answer to that. Sasuke hadn’t expected him to, and he felt him struggle with the concept. Naruto’s hero complex wasn’t doing either of them any good.

Like, I personally don't like the concept of anyone deserving love or not deserving it. Love is something you give, freely, regardless of how society values the other person. The love you give isn't less worth depending on the person receiving it. But I think the both of them are so traumatized that they need to make peace with this concept. They kind of need to be told - yes, you do deserve love, and I will give it to you. Naruto's hero complex is like... we don't have time to unpack all of that.

“You want to do this the hard way?” Sasuke continued, tone sharp. “I’ll do it with you. I don’t think you’ll succeed but I’ll do it.”

He gathered up all his resolve, all his conviction, pushed aside his own reservations.

“Saying you’ll forgive me… that’s a lie. You wouldn’t. You never would. And I wouldn’t want you to, anyway. If you wanted me by your side and I couldn’t do it, you’d be right to hate me.”

“I could never hate you.”

“Then I’d hate myself.”

Bearing each other's burdens and all that...

Naruto made a face, as if to disagree, but Sasuke felt him smile despite the topic of their conversation.

“What kind of role reversal is this,” he muttered, pressing his thumbs into Sasuke’s cheeks childishly. “I don’t even know why I’m arguing about it.”

“Because you love me.”

They stared at each other. Naruto’s eyes widened in shock, but Sasuke held his ground. What was the point in pretending anything else? It all made sense like this, and perhaps deep down Sasuke had always suspected it, even before he returned to Konoha.

“Y-you can’t just say it out loud!” Naruto spluttered, slapping his hands onto his own face instead, hiding behind them with a groan. “Stop being so smug about it!”

Me, while I wrote this: Yeah, you can't just say that out loud! The pain of being perceived. I am suffering with Naruto.

“I won the argument, didn’t I?”

“Ugh, shut up!”

Feeling lighter, Sasuke wrapped his arms around Naruto, leaning his cheek against the top of his head, Naruto burying his nose in his neck. He’d deny it when they were back in reality, but he could feel that Naruto wanted the body contact, and he was unable to resist it. It didn’t take long for Naruto to calm down, releasing a huff into Sasuke’s neck.

“Maybe we can just stay in this place forever,” he said, sneaking his arms around Sasuke’s back.

“You’d miss ramen too much.”

If an emotional scene doesn't end with a joke, what are you even doing with your life. But writing them hug was like, releasing so many endorphins. I'm weak to it.

It was strange, to talk and immediately feel every thought behind the words, every emotion on full display. Naruto’s amusement radiated off him, and it was his turn to feel a little smug as he concentrated on everything that Sasuke felt for him.

When Naruto started imagining long days spent in bed, Sasuke rolled his eyes and decided they’d been emotional enough for the time being.

Sasuke like, I can accept the lovey-dovey stuff, but I draw a thick line in front of the bedroom door. He's got some work left to do lol.

Idk if any of this made any sense but... there you have it!

[all-things-mlqc]

I wonder how they boys would react if they saw mc kissing one of the pther boys and if they confront her she explains they just made it official

I honestly think they would all react similarly for each guy. However, there is one exception that I think would be a lot different for one of them. These are more sad than happy so I apologize. The very end will have spoilers but I will give a spoiler warning before in case you want to stop reading. More under the cut~

Lucien:

He sees MC with one of the boys, holding hands and even giving each other a little kiss.

His eyes widen and his mouth parts slightly as he breathes in a small gasp.

It was unexpected.

And to see it right before his eyes, confirming MCs relationship made his stomach stir.

It was more of a shock than anything. He wouldn’t have reacted the way he did if MC had told him about her relationship prior from seeing them in the act.

However, he only smiles. A sad smile you could say.

He doesn’t believe he deserves MC and tells himself deep down that they would’ve never ended up together.

He can never be fully honest with her and he knew that would get in the way of any serious relationship they could have yeah unless you decide to ditch these dumb beliefs and open up more, be more honest with both yourself and MC

The thought pulls on his heartstrings but he continues to ignore it as it only ends up distracting him in the end.

He continues to support and encourage MC because he truly cares for her. However, he does end up pulling himself a bit away from her as well.

He stops talking about more personal things and things about himself. He says it’s because he doesn’t want to cross any boundaries but it’s also because he can’t stand the thought of not being with her so he will kill those emotions by distancing himself

Victor:

To be quite honest, he doesn’t take it as well as the others.

Jealous 101

That stick up his ass is just deeper now and he says stupid things out of jealousy.

He even questions MC about her relationship after meeting with him for a proposal.

MC: My relationship?

Victor: What is it you see in him that captured your heart hm?

MC doesn’t really know how to respond since this seems very out of character for Victor but also pretty normal since he asks the most random things at times.

He continues to stare at her, waiting for a response, but eventually looks away and insults whoever it is with something similar to “he must be a moron” as he continues to go through the papers on his desk.

This strikes a nerve with MC,

MC: What is that supposed to mean?

Jealousy + Victor = “You’re an idiot”

Keep in mind that he isn’t necessarily rude all the time and is just more tsun dumb gotta make it seem like I’m mean but not that mean

It takes time for it to sync in for him but he hates the thought of MC being with someone else no matter what. He just comes to terms with it eventually.

Shaw:

Right now, with what we have on him, he’s probably the one who is most ok with it.

He doesn’t prioritize relationships and is more drawn to what’s entertaining and fun for him.

He figured out that being in MCs company turns out to be interesting and enjoys the time with her because of this.

He involuntarily talks about more personal things at times but he hides most of everything from everyone.

The best way to put it for him is: He’s butthurt

He’s a bit pouty that someone took his “source of entertainment” and continues to tell himself that she was that and ONLY that.

But later, he feels a sort of emptiness after not being around MC as much as he used to.

DENIAL! HES IN DENIAL!!!

Even though MC is in a relationship with one of the other guys, this doesn’t exactly stop him from being buddy buddy with MC. Boundaries? Who’s that?

He knows what’s crossing the line but also doesn’t change the way he acts towards MC. tbh would probably tick off whoever she’s with

But overall, he doesn’t put as much thought into it as the others. He’s more disappointed than heartbroken if we’re talking about the Shaw we have right now.

Kiro:

Baby boy babie.

He sees MC in public being held lovingly in the arms of another man.

The sadness in his eyes is clear as crystal, however, he snaps himself out of it, telling himself that he’s being selfish.

Kiro wants all good things for MC even if it means being with someone else.

He may even wave to her with a bright smile.

He doesn’t necessarily want to talk to whoever it may be as he still feels very flustered from just seeing them.

He’s afraid he may say something selfish but ends up laughing everything off like he normally does.

It’s a bit off from his natural behavior and MC notices, so she sends him a text later that day asking if he was ok.

“Don’t worry! Just have a lot on my plate right now but I’ll be recharged in a week Miss Chips!”

He puts his phone down, lays on the bed, and stares at the ceiling for what seems like an eternity but eventually falls asleep and wakes up with a fresh start.

He’s still as friendly as ever to MC and watches out for her but keeps his distance as well because he respects personal boundaries.

Gavin:

He notices MC with another man, one he has met before. The young boy in love side of him gets jealous upon seeing them together but he’s an expert at hiding it.

It was only when they held hands that his cool facade came tumbling down.

The look of shock on his face remained there for a long minute and his heart crumpled.

He’s been in love with this girl most of his life, hoping to god that one day he could reunite with her and never let go.

He was just too late.

His love for her is so pure and deep that this doesn’t change anything for him.

He vowed to himself that he would always protect her no matter what; For she was who gave him life.

If he wasn’t already bad at responding or being available before MC was in a relationship, he is now.

He distances himself from everyone and everything. It’s just his way of coping with things.

When he sees or bumps into MC’s partner, he’s even more cold than usual. He’s not angry at them, he’s angry at himself and he can’t help but being upset every time he’s reminded that she’s not his.

However, he’s never angry at her. He still loves everything about her, respects and supports any decision she makes. He’s just frustrated with himself for not taking the leap.

BONUS

Gavin with Shaw:

**SPOILERS**

Gavin with Shaw is completely different, I’m not going to lie.

He is f u r i o u s.

Everything had been stripped away from him piece by piece in Gavin’s life.

He may have had a good relationship with Shaw growing up, but they’ve gone on separate paths since.

While I still don’t believe Gavin and Shaw hate each other, I think Gavin is just sad that it had to be this way, that they weren’t as close as they used to be.

However, seeing his little brother kissing and holding the only woman he has ever loved makes him snap.

He doesn’t take out anger on anyone, he knows that’s wrong, but he goes to an isolated field where he can let out his frustration and anger.

He blows things around and continuously asks himself “why?”

He eventually drops to his knees and lets his emotions take over, crying the rest of his pent up frustration.

He neither takes anger out on Shaw when he runs into him.

But the moment Shaw starts talking about MC, Gavin grabs the front of his collar and reels his arm back ready to take a punch.

In the end, he drops both his arm and Shaw’s collar, walking away.

Shaw calls out to Gavin and looks him dead in the eyes, saying he isn’t messing around this time and that MC is the most important person in the world to him.

He tries to convince Gavin that this isn’t just a fling and that his feelings for her are real and strong.

In a way, Shaw wants to reassure Gavin even though he knows it’s breaking him apart on the inside.

But this actually does help Gavin a bit. It takes a while, but after seeing how gentle Shaw is with her and how happy she is, Gavin begins to heal.

[nad-zeta]

Hello! I sent a match-up rq for IkeVamp as anon by accident. I am a 5'4 INFJ girl. I like to read books and write poetry. Some people describe me as a chameleon since I fit in with everyone but that's because as an empath I easily understand people. I tend to have panic attacks a lot. I am also very bubbly and friendly. I have a habit of overworking and not taking care of myself when I am focused on work. I easily blush and get very flustered with the simplest act of affection. Thanks! Tag me

Hehe, thank you so much for the request dear❤☺! Hehe soz for making ya wait sooooo long! 😱😳I hope you enjoy this, love and I hope you have the best day! ❤🌻☺

So I match you with.................. Comte 

It's no secret that for Comte it was love at first sight. This man has lived a looooong time, so the second his golden eyes glazed over you, as you were looking at one of Leonardo's paintings he knew. His heart started hammering in his chest, and a quiet voice whispered that you were the one. 

He shook his head, thinking the thought preposterous, he had stopped believing in soulmates a long time ago. He turned to leave when suddenly you gave his sleaves a gentle tug. He turned around, and the second those golden eyes locked with yours, his heart had been won. You smiled a bright smile as you handed him the dropped pocket watch. 

For the first time in this man's life, his heart was beating out of his chest, and his mind was blank. He felt like a silly teenager at the way he was rendered speechless, the second your hands touched. And he swore at that moment it was like a blot of electricity that had gone through him, sending a spark down his spine. 

He quickly gained his composure and smiled his all so charming smile as he thanked you. He had to shake his head from the silly little thoughts of soulmates and the ones. He had lived long enough to know not to get too attached. That, vampires, did not have the luxury of getting the destined soulmate and that he was fated to live out his eternal life alone. 

Sending another charming smile your way, he bid you farewell and made his way home, back the way he had come, a few days before. 

The charming smile and warm golden eyes of the mysterious man had stayed with you as you continued to explore the museum. You wondered around soon finding yourself before a large door, and curiosity must have killed the cat cause you found yourself gently pushing the door open, to explore further.

You suddenly found yourself in a completely new place. Gone were the white walls and tile floors of the museum. You were now surrounded by old fashioned wooden floors and wallpapered walls. You continued on with your explorations, walking in on a dinner attended by a variety of different characters. Before you could apologize and excuse yourself a familiar face caught your attention. Comte stared up at you in awe, just how on earth was it possible that you were now standing before him once more. He strode to your side, gently taking you hand in his to invite you to join them for dinner and the rest was history. 

You quickly befriended everyone in the mansion with your bubbly friendly personality. Cause you were a bit of a chameleon, you found yourself effortlessly blending in and adapting to life in the late 19th century. TBH all the residence adored you and saw you as a bit of a mother figure, being able to relate to and understand them. 

The one person who had taken the biggest liking to you, was the lord of the mansion himself. He loved that you got along so well with the residents of the mansion. He enjoyed that light airy feel you had that surrounding you and made a point of it to invite you to the garden for tea and snacks every day. He loved your bubbly personality, and the two of you would chat for hours on end about everything and anything. 

Comte had to laugh at the way you had adopted the role of mansion mom. Often when the residents would get up to mischief *cough Arthur cough* they would run to your side to avoid daddy Comte's wrath. You had Comte wrapped around your little finger, whether you knew it or not. If Arthur had taken a prank too far, he could be found hiding behind you, to avoid a Comte scolding session.

Comte realized rather quickly that you would get so involved in your work that you would simply forget to care for yourself. Often he would find you passed out in the library from exhaustion. He would usually let out a small sigh followed by the most tender smile, as he makes his way to your side to drape his jacket over you shoulders, before carefully picking you up and taking you back to your room. "Ma Cherie, you mustn't push yourself so hard," he gently whispers as he dusts a small kiss on your forehead as he tucks you into bed.

When you walk up later that night, you will wake up surrounded by the warmth of Comte's jacket and the sight of Comte sleeping on the edge of your bed. You can't help but smile as you run you finger through his golden locks.

Within seconds golden eyes flutter open to meet yours as he gives you with a lazy smile. "Ah your awake, you must be hungry, come, my dear let's go and get you some food." He then gently takes your hand in his and leads you to the kitchen to make you something to eat. You can't help but laugh as one would think that having lived as long as this man, he would be able to cook. Nope! Sabastian ran into the kitchen, panicked at the scent of smoke coming from the kitchen. He burst through the kitchen doors to find a small fire and both you in stitches laughing at Comte's lack of culinary skills to even make toast. Sabastian simply shakes his head with a slight chuckle at his lord and instructs both of you to wait in the dining room, while he whips up some food for the two of you.

Comte will be sure to visit you regularly to make sure you are taking care of yourself. He will legit whisk you away every lunchtime and take you out for lunch at a new cafe. If he sees you have been neglecting your sleep, he will invite you to his room and then lead you to his sofa. You will curiously eye the man as he gently guides your head to rest on his lap, as he starts to pull his finger through your hair with the softest of smiles, "you honestly make me worry, Ma Cherie, please rest for a little while." Sleep instantly finds you as he soothingly reads to you as he plays with you hair. 

This man will be by your side in a split second whenever you have a panic attack. He will wrap you up in is stong arms, as he soothingly traces small circles on you back, while telling you to focus on the sound of his heartbeat. He will help you get you breathing under control all while whispering the sweetest most encouraging word in your ears. "I am here Ma Cherie, I will always be here for you." Once you have finally got you breathing under control, he with tenderly caress you face as he wipes away all the fallen tears. It breaks his heart to see you so distressed. He will gently pick you up and take you to his room where he will spend the rest of the day cuddling with you. 

This man loves to tease you! Loves how flustered you get at any signs of affection. He will legit surprise you with little acts of affections like small lil kisses or hugs just to see the blush spread across your face. 

Often, the two of you are spending time together. Sometimes you are simply just in the same room, each busy with their own tasks. After finding you, Comte can't bear the thought of being parted from you, so he will spend as much time as possible by your side. Sometimes this boi gets lonely while working alone in his office, so he will bring his work with him to your room and just plop himself down beside you reading on your bed and continue working. He will most definitely occasionally kiss you hand or cheek, as the two of you continue with your own task snuggled side by side. Sometimes the man wonders how he ever survived without you in his life, as you bring so much light and love into his life that he has never known. 

Loves the fact that you are such a bubbly friendly chameleon, cause his job requires him to make many appearances at different balls and banquets, and as the love of his life, he is always more than thrilled when you accompany him. The room is always dazzled by the two of you cuties. Each of you charming the crowd in your own special way, to build up and foster new business connection. The two of you honestly suit each other perfectly. 

If you are feeling tired from all the socializing, Comte will quickly pick up on your silent cues and lead you to the dancefloor and spend the rest of the night with you in his arms, twirling you around. Otherwise, the two of you will enjoy the quiet of each other company out on the balcony as you watch the night sky.

This man will melt whenever you pull him away from his work to take a cuddle break. He is legit the happiest man in the whole world whenever you guide his head to rest on your lap, as you read your newest poem to him, all while pulling your fingers through his soft golden locks. I hope you are ready to be doted on and spoilt rotten cause this man loves to shower you in endless amounts of love and affection. It just so happens that his love language is both physical touch and giving gifts. So you best be sure every time you go shopping with Comte the two of you will return home with arms filled with parcels and packages.

Comte thanks his lucky stars every day for finally meeting his soul mate, the love of his life and the missing piece to his puzzle. And as such will spend every day of your eternal lives together, cherishing and loving you! 

Other potential matches……………… Napoleon 

I hope you enjoy this, dear! And I hope you have a super good day! ☺🌻❤🦋

[raywritesthings]

Not His to Change

My Writing Fandom: Arrow Characters: Oliver Queen, Laurel Lance, Robert Queen Pairing: Laurel Lance/Oliver Queen (if you really, really like bittersweet endings) Summary: Oliver gets to the afterlife once his work as the Spectre is completed and finds a surprise - and a lesson - waiting for him. Notes: Basically canon-compliant but not for Ol*city or M*rlance fans. Not really all that Lauriver either, tbh, this fic doesn’t really have an audience. Oh well. *Can be read on AO3, link is in bio*

As Oliver felt the energy leave him, he used his last remaining moments as the Spectre to construct the new world that his friends would inhabit together, a combination of two Earths. Two timelines needing to be merged. He brought back some whose lives had been cut short, softened the blows that others had suffered and crafted what he felt was the best version of reality for each of his loved ones that he could think of.

There were some things that he could not change. His father still remained buried on Lian Yu. Oliver could not think of a way for him to have become the Green Arrow without his father’s sacrifice out there in the life raft; the truth was, he was almost more scared of the man he might have ended up being without the island.

The other was Laurel. Oliver’s heart ached, but guilt twisted in his gut at the thought of callously cutting the doppelganger he had gotten to know the last few years down just for the crime of not being the ‘right’ one. The fact was, he had lost his Laurel years ago. And without her loss, the whole second wave of heroes in their city would never have been recruited. Her legacy had had that much of an effect. So he did his best to create the life he wished she had had the chance to have before it had ended; the life she deserved.

A wistful part of him wished that was a life with him, the same way he had wished it in the dream world the Dominators had created. But guilt stayed his hand again: Mia. Getting to know his daughter as an adult made her so real and alive, he couldn’t bring himself to deny her the right to existence. In the new version of Earth, he would remain with Felicity if only for her. So he would give Laurel her happy ending that the Undertaking had robbed her of instead.

Everything decided, his eyes slipped closed, and Oliver felt himself drift away from the realm of the living. Gradually, he felt awareness settle back into his body. The bone-deep exhaustion had left him, and he slowly sat up in the bed he found himself resting in.

It was his old bed, the same that he had had in the Queen Manor all those years ago. Brow furrowing in puzzlement, Oliver rose and looked through the dresser and closet, finding clothes to change into. Once changed, he ventured out of the room and down familiar hallways and stairs. He could hear the low murmur of voices coming from the kitchen, so Oliver cautiously pushed the door open, freezing in shock at the sight of the two people sitting at the kitchen island.

“—think you’ll stick around long, or back to traveling?” His father was asking.

Laurel shrugged, though as she did so, her eyes drifted to him in the doorway. “There you are, Ollie. We were starting to wonder if you were planning to spend your whole afterlife asleep.”

Her remark lacked the bite Siren would have had, her smile light and teasing instead.

“This is… we’re all here, then? There’s not a- a—” He wasn’t sure how to voice his question. Oliver couldn’t remember if being the Spectre had given him knowledge of Heaven or Hell, but he would have imagined wherever he ended up, he wouldn’t be sharing it with both Laurel and his father. They’d sat on rather opposite ends of the scale of morality, after all.

“Welcome to life after death, son,” his dad said. “Or what did that Dumbledore character call it in those books you liked?”

“The next great adventure,” Laurel supplied.

Oliver still felt a little numb, but as he drew up to his father’s chair, the older man stood and embraced him.

“It’s good to see you,” Oliver mumbled into his father’s shoulder. His real father. Not a dream, not a hallucination. Although, was it really the same thing?

He had changed the least about his father and his life, Oliver felt he could say. But even still, he had done what he could to clean up this and that, with the exception of the affair that had created Emiko. Even that he had improved with Emiko being a welcome member of the family rather than his parents hiding her from him and Thea. So was he talking to the father he knew, or just another figment of the man that wore his face? He hadn’t considered that at all, and it made his stomach twist uncomfortably.

Over his father’s shoulder, Laurel was watching him, her look both knowing and compassionate all at once. But this was a Laurel he had never really known either, as much a stranger to him as her doppelganger had once been.

His dad pulled back, keeping a hand on Oliver’s shoulder as he looked between the two of them. “Laurel asked me to let her know when you were coming to join us. There’s some things you ought to talk about, and I think she can explain it better than me.” There was a brief squeeze to his shoulder. “I know how hard you tried.”

“Tried what?”

But his dad walked out of the kitchen. Laurel slowly got up from her own chair but maintained a few feet of distance between them. “So, how was being master of the universe?”

It took Oliver a second to place the memory that question stirred; sitting on the floor of her apartment with a bowl of ice cream in his hands. He hung his head. “Definitely not what it’s cracked up to be. Let’s say I don’t miss it.”

“Not wanting that kind of power for yourself is what makes you a hero, Oliver. But… you did make some choices. Choices that weren’t yours to make.”

He licked his lips. “I couldn’t just kill your doppleganger.”

Laurel held up a hand. “I’m not talking about her. I’m talking about me and Tommy.”

He stared at her in confusion. “You loved Tommy.”

Laurel sighed. “I did in a way. But he wasn’t the love of my life. You know that better than anyone.”

Oliver shifted from one foot to the other. “I had a daughter, Laurel.”

“And I’m not saying you should have given her up, either. I am saying that I didn’t need to be forced into some kind of consolation prize marriage of convenience to make you feel better. I was happier without it.”

“How do you even know that?” He couldn’t help asking. If he had changed time, didn’t that mean everyone else forgot the old timeline? Wasn’t that how Barry said it worked?

Laurel shook her head. “Since I was dead, I got to pick which version of memories I could keep. I chose the version of the life I actually lived.”

Oliver swallowed a lump that was stubbornly trying to rise up in his throat. “Then… you really are my Laurel.”

“Mm-hm.”

He took a step closer, unable to help himself from folding her into his arms. It had been so long, and he had missed her every single day. She hugged him back.

“Everything you went through, everything you lost,” he said in her ear. “Why would you want to remember?”

“Because it created me. The best version of me I know how to be. I wasn’t going to let anyone take that away from me.” She drew back and cupped his cheek. “Not even you.”

“Only you could be that stubborn,” he said, the warmth in his tone belying his words. Laurel smirked back at him. “What happens when Tommy passes?” Even if he had brought his friend back along with so many of his loved ones, Oliver knew it couldn’t last forever. Everyone died eventually. And when his friend got to the afterlife, expecting a version of Laurel that now only existed as a fiction Oliver had invented to assuage his own conscience…

“Then he’ll find his place in the afterlife. I don’t imagine he’ll want to see me, at any rate.” Laurel left his arms completely, walking back to her chair to get a bag that she’d left hanging off the arm. “Considering he was getting ready to file for divorce before the me in that timeline was killed.”

Oliver’s eyebrows pulled together. “What?”

“From what I was told, he could see exactly what he saw in the timeline you and I remember. No matter how much power you have to wield, you can’t change who people are in their bones, Oliver. Only they can change themselves. And I wasn’t about to do that.” She finished slinging the bag over her shoulder, fixing her denim jacket so that it sat properly.

She loved him still. The lump was back, and he brought a hand up to try and wipe at the moisture starting to gather at his eyes before it could get out of control.

“If I could — if there had been a way,” he started. A way for both Laurel and Mia. God, he’d seen the way Mia had gotten on with Laurel’s doppleganger. He was sure his daughter would have found an even more supportive mentor in the Laurel he had known most of his life. The same way Thea once had.

She shook her head sadly. “Your family comes first, Ollie. We both know that. That’s why I’m not staying here. There’s a whole lot of afterlife to explore, a lot of it I didn’t see when I was alive. So you wait here for your family. It’s okay.”

It wasn’t fair, but he knew he would let her go. She was always the bigger person between the two of them, in the end. She walked past him and towards the door, and he couldn’t quite stop himself from saying, “If we’ve got the rest of eternity to spend here, my family might get sick of me after a while.” How many breaks had he and Felicity taken with their relationship, after all?

She looked back, a wan half-smile tugging at one corner of her lips as the long, blonde hair he remembered best spilled over her shoulder. “Then I guess you’ll just have to come running after me if that happens.”

He nodded. “Always.”

“Goodbye, Ollie.”

“Goodbye, Laurel.”

She let herself out of the kitchen, and he heard the front door shut moments later. Slowly, he walked to the island and took the chair she had sat in. Like most times, she had left him with much to think about.

If anyone could see fit to defy him even when he had held the power of a near-God, it was Laurel. A breathy laugh left him at the thought. She always was able to bring him back down to Earth, even when they were no longer on it. Wasn’t that a relief?

[youralternantpersonality]

Enduring Love

Paul x Reader: Enduring Love

Part 1: Eternal Love

Part 2: Everlasting Love

Part 3: Endless Love

Part 4: Enduring Love

***

Your POV

It’s getting hotter and hotter by the second. I don’t know if I can handle this any longer. At some point, I realized that I am currently naked running on the steaming hot ground looking for a point that is cool enough for me to rest. Or at least a way out of this misery. Trees are falling and fires are consuming the forest. I gave up on trying to find a way out. It was no use, I’m stuck. All I can do is find a way around this hell.

I keep running until I see it. The big tree. The center of the forest that has been my safe place the whole time I have been here. Looking at it, it seems like the only normal place here. Where I don’t have to struggle; somewhere comfortable until everything calms down.

I reach my tree and I can rest, but only for a minute. Out of nowhere, I could feel the roots of the tree become warmer and hotter than the rest of the forest. I figure, my last hope is to climb. I have no way out or around this place. There’s no exit, no Snout, and I am alone. I cry and plead for help as I climb up this tree with what little strength I have. When I get to the top, I can see the forest, and all I saw was red and orange flames. Smoke consuming everything, and no possible way out. It was in my last seconds I remember what the beautiful lady told me.

“…you’ll be given two choices soon. Make sure you choose the right one. Your life depends on it.”

“Your life will depend on it…”

I can easily assume that she is talking about this situation. And honestly, all I want is the pain to stop. I’m too tired to fight, but too scared to stop. As the fire gets closer and closer to me, the branch holding me starts to break. I climb to the highest point and make my decision.

Paul’s POV

It’s been two and a half days already. I want this to end now! Edward was supposed to be able to read her, but apparently, he can’t. She’s still breathing, her eyes are involuntarily moving around, but there’s no active response in her. Not a damn thing. As the hours go on, I am eventually put in my place on what happened a few days ago that put us in this position. That put the love of my life in her position.

The evening of the Accident: August 24th

Y/n, Emily, Kim, and Clair were all in the kitchen making dinner while the guys and I were in the living room playing on the PS5. I had got up to go to the bathroom and on my way back I saw Y/n/n phone light up to see, no other than, Alice Cullen calling her. What the hell would that leech be calling Y/n/n for? And why does she have her number saved? I grab the phone and before I can answer I hear Y/n come up behind me.

“Hey babe!” she runs up to me. As soon as she sees my face she stops and her smile drops. “Babe? Are you ok?”

“Why is that leech calling you?” the house goes quiet. She looks to her phone just as the call ends, rolls her eyes, and nonchalantly says,

“It’s just Alice. I ran into her and Bella at the mall to pick out some last-minute gifts for the baby shower.”

“But why do you have her number saved! What are you? Buddy-buddy with them now?!” she tilts her head to the side, squints her eyes, her nose flairs, and heat radiates from her.

“And if I am?” she states calmly. “not once did they ever hurt nor touch me. And if I don’t fucking recall, they don’t feed off humans.”

“One snap and you could have been dead!”

“And that doesn’t apply to you too?! Seriously Paul! Alice helped me pick out some great stuff for Em and Sam’s baby shower, Christmas presents, oh, and your birthday! What evil person does that! Cause last time I checked, you guys sure love that PS5 Alice saw come out and hinted to me for us to preorder it for you guys!? Should I take that back and get the money back? Because I’ll easily do it.”

“No... Ouch! Jared.”

“Shut up Quil!”

“THEY COULD STILL HURT YOU! I don’t want you talking to them again!”

“Hell no! Last time I checked, I don’t have to ask you who I should or shouldn’t be friends with! I can make my judgment!”

“See, this is why I wish I would have never imprinted, especially on someone like you! Why can’t you just listen?!” I say. In that second, you can hear a pin drop. The words flew out before I could stop them. Usually, I have control over what I say in our argument, but this time, I couldn’t.

“Wow…Bet.” Y/n said. Fuck. I groan and follow her outside.

“Paul!” Sam calls out to me

“It’s fine Sam, the truth comes out one way or another. Snout, let’s go, baby!” Y/n walks out the front door and towards her car. I reach out to grab her hand that was holding Snout’s leash. It slips and Snout runs towards and into the woods across the street. Y/n runs after Snout, and everything goes in slow motion. Not paying attention to the truck coming, her body slammed by a truck speeding by and she instantly hit and crack her skull on the asphalt. I run to her hold her in my arms until the ambulance comes as her life slips away. And that when my life came to a stop. All I hear is sirens from a distance and the feeling of warm thick liquid dripping onto my skin and clothes.

EMT’s come and try to take her from my arms, but I resist until Sam and Jared make me let go. I watch as they strap the love of my life to the gurney and put her inside of the truck.

“Shit,” Brady said. I look over and see Snout, dead, next to the truck's tire. His leash got caught against something and dragged him, snapping his neck. I can’t help but lose it at that point. Before I’m aware of doing so, I try to run, but I’m stopped by Embry. The cops want to talk to me and ask what happened. Somehow, I was able to answer some of the questions, but I could feel myself breaking down as I tell them what happened.

Thus, leading us up to here.

Present-day: September 2nd

I could hear it—the final heartbeats. Carlisle and Edward rushed in as we listened to the final intake of breath and the thumping of her heart. After the last one, we’ll know which path she decided to take.

Thump-thump

Thump-thump

Thump-thump

…Flatline….

 My Love

[daxieoclock]

ok shay you dont understand i was literally scrambling through our messages on discord to find a dissidia link and now i cant pick between the kairi reunion with sora and the namixi bed sharing scene so you gotta pick for me

jdhfbghjgb Enu you absolute sweetheart thank you for the ask

they’re both kinda short scenes though sooooo por que no los dos djhfgbjh

Kairi reunion scene is in chapter 10 and the Namixi scene is in chapter 14

She'd only been there twice before, both times after Xehanort's defeat, but Kairi instantly recognized Terra, Aqua and Ventus's home: the quintuple towers and golden chains of the Land of Departure.

I don’t remember if I ever articulated what both of those times were in my head, but it’s a HC that just felt right hehe.

And there, sitting on the bottom steps leading up to the front door, was Sora.

He hopped up as soon as he saw her, that stupid grin all over his face, and then Kairi's eyes blurred over and her feet pounding against the stone courtyard.

"It's so good–" he said, and she cut him off by punching him as hard as she possibly could in the shoulder. "OW!"

Kairi’s anger, frustration and just general emotion is something I had a lot of fun exploring in DKH, and something I definitely want to do more of if I ever return to KH writing (still undecided on that). As much as I love the comedy beat of the pissed-off reunion, it’s an honest feeling I think, to be both overjoyed and infuriated by someone at the same time. And it definitely fits my interpretation of where Kairi – who has been incessantly damseled, left behind and sacrificed-for – is at this moment in her arc. Furious and bitter and just wanting to drag her dumbass bffs/bfs to safety whether they like it or not.

"It's so good–" he said, and she cut him off by punching him as hard as she possibly could in the shoulder. "OW!"

"You absolute, goddamn, stupid idiot!" Kairi shrieked. "Do you have any idea how worried I was? How worried Riku was?"

For whatever reason this makes me think of the very beginning of the story, with Riku lying awake thinking of Sora. Like...yeah. Yeah he was. And on that note, as much as I missed Sora’s presence in the story, I absolutely loved the chance to expand on Riku and Kairi’s friendship/relationship (it’s complicated; when is it ever not?) without him there. I wanted to emphasize both how much they care about each other, and how much Sora’s absence is felt nearly constantly.

"Probably," Sora said, sheepish, massaging his shoulder.

"We had to try and explain to your parents how you....you vanished into thin air, but how it's actually completely okay because you did it to save my life!"

I don’t know that I’ll ever focus too much on any of the KH characters’ biological families, but I think the Destiny trio are the closest to actually Having Any Sort Of Bond with their parents. We’ve got a vague idea of Kairi’s home life – adopted daughter of the mayor, and I’ve extrapolated her dad is kind of absent – but none of Riku’s and only the fact that Sora has a mom. But the idea of Kairi and Riku returning to the island alone, having to break the news to Sora’s parents, just stuck in my head when I was writing this.

She didn't know who embraced who first. But she was in his arms then, and he was in hers, and she squeezed him so close, so goddamn tightly.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"Just hold me," she said. "Just shut up and hold me."

I think this is just a sweet moment tbh djhfgbj.

"Your hair looks longer," Kairi said, finally. They were sitting on the steps together. Her eyes had cleared, but she wasn't ready to leave this moment. "And you're missing a button on your jacket."

"Oh." Sora ran a hand through his hair in that absentminded way that he did. He laughed. "I hadn't noticed."

Liar. She knew him well enough to know when he was putting on a front, and he definitely was now. But she wasn't much better, she had refused to point out the bags under his eyes, the greyish pallor of his tan skin, the way his blue eyes seemed darker than she remembered. She couldn't speak those details, as if silence would make them go away, as if she could will away the scuff from his shoes and the dullness from the little metal crown that hung around his neck. He reminded her of how Aqua had looked after they'd rescued her, so relieved but yet so exhausted. It was the impact of that much time spent alone, that much time spent wandering, spent lost and far away from the ones you love. Kairi's grip on Sora's hand tightened.

I will never forgive Nomura’s cowardice to not show the physical, kinda traumatizing toll that years of isolation in the RoD took on Aqua. 0.8 delved into it slightly, but only in the most surface-level way. And judging by what we’ve seen from Re:Mind and MoM, the same sort of surface-level emotion is going to be applied to Sora’s ‘death’ as well. He’s almost definitely going to come out of a YEAR of complete isolation being just as chipper and bright-eyed as he’s always been, and that is something I wanted to rectify here.

I love the KH cast and I love seeing them challenged, and love watching them grow. There’s not quite enough Sora in DKH to grasp the full extent of how he’s changed after his ‘death,’ but I’d like to think we do see that he HAS changed. It’s something I touched on more directly during Riku’s reunion with Sora, but it’s present here as well.

"So, who's your friend?" He motioned with his head towards the Spirit-Namine, who sat patiently on her haunches.

"Sora, it's me," she said with a little laugh. "It's Namine."

"Oh." Sora stared at the Spirit-Namine for a moment, the gears straining in his head, and then he looked over his shoulder up the stairs, then back at her with a confused expression on his face. "Wait, weren't you sleeping inside? Why are you here and a cat? How are you here and a cat?"

But of course, even after that sort of trauma, Sora is still Sora. He’s still a goober and a softie, and I didn’t want to abandon those traits for the sake of angst.

Sora had never been very comfortable with silence, she noticed him starting to shift and adjust next to her.

ADHD Sora rights.

Kairi kept catching herself holding her breath, waiting for him to vanish or the floor to give way or her alarm to wake her up. Waiting for something to drag him away again.

He looked over his shoulder at her and smiled. "I'm not going anywhere, you know," he said.

Kairi spluttered. "What...who...shut up!" She stared at the ground, cheeks flushed, unable to acknowledge out loud that he'd read her so well.

I haven’t decided if Sora’s surprising emotional perceptiveness is a new aspect of his character or something he’s always had that hasn’t been highlighted well, but it’s definitely an interpretation of him I enjoy. Like, yeah, he’s impulsive and inattentive and kind of rude on occasion, but he’s also showed some moments of being able to read people with shocking accuracy. I think that’s a skill some Keyblade wielders have, a sort of magical hyper-empathy, and Sora definitely has it in spades without even trying.

And briefly before we go into Namixi (and speaking OF Namixi)

Xion glanced at Sora and Kairi from the middle chair and threw up a peace sign. "Hey, what's up?" Her outfit had also changed a lot since Kairi saw her last, she had on a pair of loose black cargo shorts and a pullover hoodie, her black hair swept to one side and tucked behind her right ear. Honestly, she looked a lot happier, a lot freer.

Butch Xion is absolutely the hill I will die on this gal is 100% loves girls and presenting in nonconforming ways.

Namine, laying against Xion, her eyes closed and her expression peaceful.

Xion looked down at Namine as she noticed Kairi's stare. "Oh, yeah, I'm uh...keeping her safe? Cause she can't move when doing her spell, and uh, probably more comfortable than laying on this ground or something right?" She forced a laugh. "Yeah."

Namine, who absolutely has ulterior motives: “I’m going to be unconscious while using this spell and I’d rather not wake up sore, so maybe you could hold me while I’m using it? I’d make me feel safer too.”

Xion, who is gay as shit and forgot about the fact this castle has beds in it: “Yes absolutely I will totally hold you for as long as you need Namine wow yes that sounds great I’m on board heck yeah.”

*************

And with that introduction let’s hop right into the dedicated Namixi scene shall we.

Namine heard her door open, then close. She didn't move, just kept staring straight ahead, lying on her side in the bed, her heart beating staccato on the inside of her chest. A quiet bump of collision in the dark.

"Ow!" Xion muttered. "Stupid bed."

No good confession scene is complete with at least a couple comedy beats.

Her eyes probably had to adjust to the dark still, which Namine was thankful for, considering the fact she was probably blushing up a storm at the moment. "Are you okay?" She sounded so concerned, oh light.

Gentlebutch Xion strikes again. I refuse to see her as anything but very polite towards pretty gals (and Namine is very pretty gal in her humble opinion).

"I'm fine," Namine said, quickly. "I just...." She reached out to take Xion's hand, but hesitated, and just let her own fall back onto the mattress. "Wanted to see you, I guess."

"Oh," Xion said. Relief. Namine started when she felt Xion's fingers brushing against her hand. "Shit, sorry, sorry."

"No, no." Namine laughed, and took Xion's hand. "Thank you. This is really nice."

The eternal sapphic dance of being terrified of overstepping and desperate to express your affection at the same time. Also I have said it before and I will say it again: The Gay Gals Love Hands. Idk what it is but sapphic attraction is like 75% hand-holding it’s ridiculous.

Xion opened her eyes again, those gorgeous purple eyes.

Changing characters’ eye color is sort of a running theme in my fics I suppose, though it doesn’t ALWAYS come up. Xion’s purple eyes is something I saw once and got stuck in my brain forever. I have no idea who came up with it or why it’s something that apparently a decent chunk of Xion fans hc for her, but it sure is what we’ve decided on haha.

Three words. That's it. So easy, just three words. Just say it. Say it. "When you found out Sora was here, and decided to go after him." Coward.

Namine, like most of the female cast of KH, has basically no outwards emotion and very little development. For whatever reason, I’ve fixated on an interpretation of her as someone who expresses her emotions in unconventional ways, spends a lot of time overthinking things, protects herself by exaggerating her personality around others while also being terrified of hurting people the way she was forced to hurt Sora. It’s sort of funny to see a very similar personality come up around my interpretations of Haru Okumura in Deja Vu, but Namine definitely expresses her post-trauma identity a lot softer, less formal but still so very careful.

Anyway that’s a lot of words to say that she self-loathes and picks her words incredibly carefully and that contrasts really interestingly with the more impulsive, emotion-driven Xion. They’re a good fit for each other C:

"You can get under the covers too, if you like."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable."

Please stop being a gentlewoman and take the hint. "I want you to," Namine said. Was that too firm? Too bossy?

"Oh!" Xion smiled, and threw the comforter over herself in an instant. Guess it was fine.

More of that aforementioned dynamic.

"This is very good. I'm happy."

"I'm glad," Xion said. "I...like making you happy."

Namine had to inhale deeply at that. It wasn't easy to confess when the girl kept taking her breath away.

I really like the idea in general that it takes so long for Namine to tell Xion how she feels because Xion just keeps doing really sweet things or being kind of romantic but not really making the space for that confession, and Namine just gets flustered and puts it off.

Three words. Just three. Just say them. Namine took a deep breath. "I, uh. I..." She felt a sob welling up in her throat. Light, why was this so difficult, why couldn't she just tell Xion–

Her lips were on hers. Namine couldn't breathe, could barely think for the screaming of her heart in her ears. Xion broke the kiss, looking so very embarrassed. "Sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean–"

Namine reached up and pressed a finger to Xion's lips, cutting her off before she could apologize any more. "Um," she said, "kiss me again?"

And Xion nodded, and Namine let her finger fall, let Xion lean in and kiss her again. And she squeezed her hand so tightly and kissed her back.

So not really a confession but Xion DID get the hint. Once more: Xion’s impulsiveness makes things both very difficult and much easier for Namine. And I think I like the fact that she ends up deciding to just go along with that impulsiveness, just let go of her plan and kiss the gal she’s been pining for, and stop beating herself up about the words she can’t say yet. It’s sweet hehe.

[animefan-overran]

Birthday Surprise (Twinleafshipping)

This is another multi-part story. Tbh, I honestly don’t know how I busted this part out so fast, I guess it’s considered pretty short, but I don’t know. With this story, I wanted to be able to have a choose your own story format, so this is the first part. After this depending on your preference, you can choose to read whatever part 2 that you would like. Hope everyone enjoys!

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****PART ONE**** (RATING:CUTE/FLUFF)

Dawn scratched her head and stared blankly at the clean piece of paper in front of her, sighing at the reality of her situation. Her mind, fried from thinking so much, was ready to shut down. Giving into her fatigue, she closed her eyes, and rested her head in her arms, that already found their way to the table in front of her. Just as she was about to doze off into a peaceful slumber, the thump of the kitchen door opening  jostled her awake. She glanced over wearily to her mother, who had just returned from the grocery store. Her mother stared back at her with a knowing expression. After all, she didn’t need a rosetta stone to interpret her own daughter. 

“Honey, I know that face all too well. What’s up?” Dawn’s mother finally spoke up, breaking the silence between them.

Dawn shrugged her shoulders in mere defeat “Ah, I don’t know,” she groaned rubbing her eyes in a careless fashion “It’s just that Barry’s birthday is in a week, and I wanted to get him something good this year.” she sighed her figure slumping further into her chair “So, I decided to sit down and brainstorm, but nothing is really jumping at me, ya know? Nothing is really screaming ‘Happy 18th birthday!’.”

Nodding at her daughter’s words, Dawn’s mom proceeded to put away the groceries that she had brought in with her “Well, you could always ask him what he wants,” her mom stated simply.

Almost instantly, Dawn’s eyes widened in disbelief “Ask him? I can’t do that. Sure maybe if our friendship was still fairly new, but I’ve known this guy my whole life. If I ask him what he wants, what will that say about me as his friend?” Dawn replied.

“Well, honey, I don’t know what to tell you then,” her mom looked at her with an apologetic expression “Good luck in your endeavors though.” She stated.

“Thanks, I’m gonna need it,” she murmured, getting up from her seat “I think, I’m just gonna go for a walk. Maybe I’ll get some inspiration outside. I’ll see ya later, mom,”

“Ok, dear. Just try to be back before dinner” her mom called out just in time for Dawn to hear before she left the house.

Closing the door, Dawn was immediately hit with an intoxicating scent; it was the wildflowers that bloomed in the grass every spring. She smiled as she breathed in the pleasant aroma, and exhaled all the tension that she had built up in the kitchen. Nature always had a way of calming her down, especially during this time of the year. She started down the familiar road that connected Twinleaf to a nearby forest trail. This is where she usually went when she needed to implement some good old fashioned problem solving. The woods provided the perfect escape from her mind, and that’s exactly what she needed. Within minutes of listening to the Starly and Bidoof of the forest, Dawn’s motivation was fully recharged. I wonder if Barry likes being in nature as much as I do. Maybe I could take him on a camping trip? Or maybe I could build us a secret hideout out here… Dawn’s thoughts were finally starting to take some shape, something that she was grateful for, to say the least. Just as she was about to turn around to head back, she saw two familiar looking objects a couple hundred yards ahead of her. She walked a little closer to ensure that her eyes were not deceiving her. She gasped, as she finally got close enough to clearly see the subject of her curiosity. Her heart beat raised as she realized she was looking at the bikes of none other than Barry and Lucas.

Immediately, Dawn was hesitant to go any further. What are Barry and Lucas doing all the way out here. Huh, maybe they’re having one of their famous ‘bro times’. But, where did they go? Dawn thought to herself looking around for her two friends. Just then, she heard two familiar voices coming from the woods behind her, their pitches getting louder with each word. Barry and Lucas were coming back to their bikes. Panicking a little, Dawn ran behind a bush and crouched down. The last thing she wanted was for them to think that she followed them. 

“You’re right Lucas, that was a great fishing spot. I can’t wait to show off my new Magikarp to everyone.” Barry smiled pridefully.

“Yeah, man who knows, maybe it’ll even impress Dawn,” Lucas laughed unchaining his bike from a nearby tree. 

“Dude, not funny. Don’t make me fine you for that comment,” Barry snapped back quickly.

Lucas shook his head “I don’t know, it’s kind of funny to me how you’ve liked her for so long, and yet you still haven’t told her how you feel. You’re gonna be 18 soon for crying out loud. You’re gonna have to Machamp up like they say,” Lucas scolded lightly.

Barry sighed knowing full well that his friend spoke the truth. “Ok, first off, no one says Machamp up, it’s literally only you. Second, I know you’re right, but I’m just not sure how she’ll react to it. She could laugh in my face, I can’t have that!” 

“Yeah, I guess you’re right, take your time I guess,” Lucas grinned as the two hopped on their bikes and pedaled back towards Twinleaf Town. 

Dawn stood up from her hiding spot once she was sure that the boys were long gone. “Well, I don’t think I was supposed to hear that,” she stated bluntly in minor shock, her cheeks burning a bright shade of pink. Barry was right, she didn’t know how to respond to this new information. Dawn remained quiet, standing completely still for what seemed like an eternity. For the life of her she couldn’t find any words to describe what she was feeling. 

Barry likes… me? Dawn constantly rolled the thought over in her mind, as she made her way back to her house. That boy can be so elusive with his feelings I would have never known. Who knows, maybe he’s trying his best, and I’m just being extremely dense. Searching the idea of her and Barry as a couple was a completely new concept that brought a host of undiscovered feelings along with it. Feelings of excitement,  curiosity, and weightlessness.

Finally, upon returning to her house, she mindlessly sat down in her front yard, wanting to soak up the last vestiges of the sun before night fell. She laid down in the grass, and gazed up at the dusk’s magnificent display of faded orange, intense fuchsia, and deep violet. Just like the day, who knew that someone could have so many colors to them? Moreover, I would've never guessed that person to be Mr.Busy-body… Dawn giggled at the ever so realistic image of Barry running around always looking for his next purpose. That boy truly is amazing, he never stops… and now I can’t stop thinking about him… Dawn hardly realized she had lost all track of time, in thought of the blonde haired boy, something she never imagined was possible. Nevertheless, she enjoyed being whisked away from reality in thought of her and Barry together. If only I could make Barry to forget about his busy schedule...  a smirk slowly edged its way onto Dawn’s lips. That’s it, I know what to get Barry for his birthday!

****END OF PART ONE****