#ranting about vampires

[generalsdiary]

technically, there are many kinds of vampires in fiction.

are we talking about twilight vampires, in which case they're basically made of rock/ice, so always rock hard? (pun intended)

or are we talking about the vampire diaries vampires, in which case their hearts do beat, albeit slowly, and they keep their bodily heat by consuming warm drinks/food.

of course there are also vampires with cold bodies with paused decomposition who don't have beating hearts, in which case they wouldn't have such an ability.

moreover, there are vampires in for ex. the Dark Heroine by Abigail Gibbs, who are royal families that procreate, and they behave as supernatural humans (with the need to consume blood); warm bodied.

another mention would be vampires in shadowhunters who are simple reanimated corpses with no heartbeat. a conclusion can be made they might have the physical ability to "get hard".

food for thought.

Ever since I saw your vamp/were aventurine/ratio i have come to have a question of great importance that nobody has answered. /hj

Can vampires get hard?

... They are undead. Their hearts don't beat I believe. Can they? If so... how?

This question is haunting me. I don't know why I've not thought of it before. I don't know what about your silly pretty comics made the question arise in my mind when I've been awere (ha) of them for so long.

Feel free to ignore and delete in case you are uncomfortable or such.

he can blush so i don't see why he can't get hard

ask ratio for the details he's the doctor here

[erebus0dora]

something something a chat i am in discussing the loneliness of Armand who needs someone to define him and see him, so

"...it was ghastly and awful and loathsome, and beautiful all at the same time."

and yeah i kinda just want to give ppl hugs with anything i do and talk to them in hushed tones, so there you go

[ohitslen]

*Vampirizes your Vashwood*

keep reading for more :)

If there needs to be much closer close-up please let me know!

[hellspawnmotel]

[arrowheadedbitch]

The worst part of mbav getting canceled is we'll never know where they were going with Ethan

Like they alluded to him being way more powerful than anyone knew yet and then it just ended

They all blew up and it was over

WHAT WERE THE OTHER SEER POWERS GONNA BE

[gilbirda]

hot take but we as a society need to be more comfortable about discussing "icky" parts of history, and even telling the side of the "bad guys"

hear me out

history is written by the victors, and will be heavily biased. The defeated will be painted as evil, deviants and/or like they have always been "the bad guys".

Reducing people to "the bad guys" does a huge disservice to the opportunity of learning from the past, because it creates a distance between the modern reader and the actual events, it creates the comfortable position of "I'm not like the bad guys, so i will never make their mistakes"

I think is important we understand how and why people believed in something, and where did things turn a certain way. Yes. Even "the wrong side". Even the nazis. Even those people you are thinking about, whoever they are.

Because you are not immune to propaganda and it's so so so so important to understand what happened and how did we get to those points before we fall to the same techniques again and again.

"Learning from the past" isn't deleting the ugly parts or cringing when someone brings up war. Thinking otherwise is a huge mistake and precisely what someone who wants to make the same mistakes wants you to think.

[platoapproved]

for @dancinbutterfly who requested this, but also any non tvc book readers who may be curious... here's some excerpts from the scene in the vampire armand where a bunch of guys are bidding for which one of them gets to fuck amadeo and marius encourages it / treats it as a game / commands amadeo to kiss one of them while he kills him. imho this is a part of the text the show writers likely drew inspiration from for the idea of marius 'donating' amadeo.

for reference, these are all taken from chapter 5! so @dancinbutterfly you can direct your friend who doesn't believe this was in the text there.

how do i even begin to content warn for this, it's so fucking BAD. i guess the usual tva warnings for grooming & csa, sexual assault, pedophilia, kind of incest?, slavery, just... marius bein' marius y'know. (IT'S REALLY BAD. like i do just want to emphasize for anyone who has not read tva it's quite explicit and upsetting plz be aware):

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[its-placeebo]

MARIUS DE ROMANUS?

STUPID IDIOT MOTHERFUCKING MARIUS DE ROMANUS GOD DAMN FOOL BOOK COLLECTING DUST EATING RAT OLD BASTARD SHITHEAD IDIOT AVATAR OF THE WHORE BIGGEST CLOWN OF THE CIRCUS LAUGHED OUT OF TOWN COWBOY MOTHERFUCKING MARIUS DE ROMANUS

[mrghostrat]

I love the idea of vampire!Aziraphale. I imagine him still being a bastard about it too. All other vampires wear black but it washes him out so he doesn’t. He prefers to drink blood out of a teacup because straight from the neck is unseemly. Etc.

YOU GET IT... angel aziraphale is basically a vampire already, keeping his old clothes and books he's gotten attached to over the years, and hiding away for weeks at a time while he indulges new music with the shades drawn

my aziraphale is very gothic romantic about it: he doesn't kill anyone, that would be cruel and unnecessary (and he doesn't want the........ blood on his hands). he's a "creep in your window and feed off you while you sleep" kind of vampire, and moves on after a few days when his target starts to weaken too much. at worst, they'll think they have a bad flu.

he definitely robbed a blood bank once, and keeps his store in emptied out bottles of Châteauneuf-du-Pape 😂

(crowley can't be hypnotised)

[dxxtruction]

"Louis acting like a pimp to Armand" And what is a pimp exactly? Quickly. And, oh so sexual trauma survivors can't engage in kink now without it being all about that? Pet names? They can't be submissive anymore? Consensually? Sexually healthy? Be serious. I'd hardly say there's much power difference between them during all this anyway, except that Louis is freer than Armand and it's been putting a strain on their relationship. Louis wants more from Armand, and less of this 'being his past' for them both, and so helping Armand with this could fix that. It's healthy to want to help your partners get out of a rough patch?

I mean, the whole exchange was very clearly set up as a "I want to help you" after such a great moment of vulnerability Louis feels just how much Armand is desperate for it. Louis called Armand so they could work out a plan together.

And the bit with the umbrella was Louis' way of asking 'are you willing to listen to me?' and Armand said yes by unfolding it. Louis goes on and explains, Armand is allowed to argue against it, but Louis makes his point. And then he gives Armand a way to make his own choice in it too. Armand's already decided 'I want you, more than anything else in the world', but Louis still asks after if he's sure of his choice, and with a name, Arun, that is the one of his fullest agency, running the point home. Honoring the situation Armand calls Louis Maitre - as a way of being like 'I'll do as you've said then'. To make this work he's going to have to give Louis some of the control, yes. But it's the first time such a role is ever established, and it was his choice to do it. So so what if they do it in a very suggestive way? They can't like doing that? I think it's them having fun.

I struggle to find how Louis is being overly domineering here when really he's giving and offering Armand the most agency he's ever had. Same with finding it manipulative. The manipulation was more earlier in the episode I think, when he was stringing him along, giving mixed signals. He's no longer toying with him like that. Louis might be pushing Armand, leading him on to make a decision, but he doesn't mean bad by it.

But back to this pimp thing. I find it frankly offensive that this is where people are going with this. I get it, but to run with it being the case is, on many levels, wrong.

Louis told us episode 1 this was the only sustainable line of work to support his family and keep their standing, at the time. It was never his choice to be doing this either but his blackness allowed no other options. He did what he did so his family could stay in that house and maintain all their same comforts. It gave him privileges most black men didn't have at the time that he wanted to maintain and even have more of. Anyway, it doesn't and had never defined him the way 'being good at running things' had. And in that case he just likes having that kind of control where he can get it, which makes sense.

The world is what placed that kind of role onto him of what he was allowed to be able to run, not himself. And on that he actually treated the sex workers he employed well and respected them enough to give them more opportunity.** He recognizes they don't have much in the way of options either.

Louis employed sex workers, yes, but he didn't subject them to abuse, (like how Armand was)*. He didn't oversee things in a way that would go against their consent (see; episode 1 again)**. Sometimes a job is just a job. And Sex work is work.

Armand's particular past with sexual abuses may strike a particular cord with Louis, given all that, but the very last thing either is thinking is that Louis' pimping Armand out here. This is merely their decision as companions, and had nothing to do with adding another line in a laundry list of selling Armands body out to people at the command of someone else. Armand rescinds some of his control to Louis' wishes, because he wants him, and he trusts him, that's all.

If you aren't allowing Armand that choice, and are doubtful it's fully his, you're putting him right back in the box of being defined by his abuses. Putting him back into that space where he isn't given any agency over what he does. (Which is exactly opposite of what the intent of this scene is for)*.

*: (edit) added for clarity.

**: (strike through) numerous people are saying I'm misremembering these points so disregard it. (Thought he was siding with Bricks, it was the other way around). (Technically one aspect of those opportunities were for getting around the law). I don't have a perfect memory, it happens. Let's not get mad about it. Doesn't change much of the point which is that Louis, now, Louis then, was always considering more about the running things and for stated purposes. So I guess I'd say he may only have respected the SWers enough sometimes for what allowed him to do that, and there are moments he certainly expressed remorse over the fact, but he has a great deal higher respect for Armand that is genuine. It's incomparable. Please read my added notes in the tags, it should address most other concerns.

[sharksandsquirrelsandsnakes-ohmy]

Stiles, having been kidnapped again: And, honestly, that's why I'm scared to ship any two Star Wars characters ever again before seeing their family tree. I mean, I don't want the franchise to end up like Game of Thrones— dying of incest-born diseases and poor write—

Kidnapper: DO YOU EVER SHUT UP???

Stiles: No really, no. Maybe if I'm unconscious but I've been told I talk in my sleep too—

Kidnapper: Shut up!

Kidnapper: Fuck this. This isn't worth the money. Get out!

Stiles, having already untied his own restaints: Man, I thought it was going to take you longer to let me go. Didn't even get to all the Percy Jackson characters being cousins.

[fuzziiwuzzii]

Claudia & Farleigh 😼

[autism-purgatory]

“Your vampires suck bc they arent accurate to vampires/doesn’t fit my extremely strict (usually Eurocentric) ideas of vampires” wrong. Skill issue. Vampires or changelings or whatever aren’t real and people can do whatever the fuck they want with them, hope this helps.

[sweetchildcloud]

This are my crushes and what...does it say about me?

[just-about-nothing]

i could treat anya so much better than xander does fr

[loadingbraincells]

guys... guys...