#problem area

[invisible-pink-toast]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer | Melissa Broder, "Problem Area"

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Two of Swords - Trying to keep the balance

* * * *

I ask god to send a swordsman / and god says ‘look at your hands’

— Melissa Broder in “Problem Area” from Last Sext

[glowingskindiaries]

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[krysmcscience]

Did somebody say Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear? I think somebody said Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear. Thanks to that, have these retooled The Good Place jokes:

The "powers that be" can refer to either the Theraprism staff, the Axolotl, or just. Ya know. Disney in general. Or all three! Whichever you think is funniest. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The "party" Bill's referring to is Weirdmageddon, of course. He was quite the ashhole to everyone back then.

Ford has probably gotten pretty good at the 'tune out your psychopathic ex with dank memes' challenge.

It must be very cathartic to be able to make Bill shut up whenever you want with just the press of a button. I'm sure Ford doesn't abuse this ability at all.

Oh, sure, 'Not now,' he says, before he immediately backs out of the newly-made hole in the Theraprism wall. 🙄

Don't worry, Bill doesn't get far.

also yeah i know this one doesn't have an attempted swear - i just wanted to use the joke because of the massive stink-eye involved in it because it makes me laugh

⬇️ More goofs beneath the brief ramble if you wanna skip it lmao⬇️

Why is Ford even there, you might ask? Well, he either decided he preferred to watch Bill suffer in person over being distantly and repeatedly harassed with the same evil desperation book for the rest of his life, or he got roped into some kind of contrived community service for 1.) all his many counts of interdimensional thievery, and 2.) his ignoring all the very clear warnings to NOT summon Bill in the first place (which I like to imagine is also illegal). Theraprism staff were just like, 'Wait, this guy matters to Bill? Ooh, we can USE that! It might be the only thing that can help him want to get better!' It is not considered that throwing Ford at Bill so soon after Weirdmageddon could instead make them both WORSE - in new and altogether special ways! :D

Anyway, I'm calling it the Community Service AU, and I am most likely not going to do anything else with it beyond appropriating these silly Good Place jokes. So, feel free to adopt the concept if y'all wanna??? Just make sure that Bill is still not allowed to swear, no matter what, full stop. It's gotta be a real linguistic corkblork of a situation for him, is all I'm sayin'.

Finally, have these bonus Good Place jokes, but with Handyman!Bill this time:

'Opposite tortures' doesn't sound so bad...at least until it's an all-powerful chaos entity known for torture saying it.

you may think i forgot mabel's cute pink cheeks but the truth is that i did in fact forget but then immediately stopped caring which makes it okay, SHHHHHHH

And, finally:

lmao this is shit

True facts, if you cram Season 1 Eleanor Shellstrop and Michael into a singular triangle shape, they turn into Bill Cipher. This is science, look it up. Or don't, and just trust the source that is me, bro.

Anyway, I should be in bed, y'all have fun with these, I guess. Tune in after like a week or so and maybe I'll have an addendum to my comic about how Bill was drawn naked for karaoke night. Because him actually being naked was not the only thing I considered as a plausible explanation. XD

Also if you see any inconsistencies or errors in any of these comics, No You Do Not :D

Also also, reblogs are rad as hell and I appreciate every single one, just don't repost, please and thanks. Every time a repost is made, an artist somewhere cries. :,)

[creekfiend]

something that drives me insane on a relatively regular basis as a body jewelry understander is talking to people who have sensitive skin who are like "oh well I just can't wear any earrings without my ears getting inflamed" and I say "well what have you tried" and they say "well I've tried sterling silver and I've tried gold..." and it's like. ok. I don't know how gold and sterling somehow got spun by the jewelry industry as being especially good for sensitive skin but whenever I'm like "well have you tried implant grade titanium" they're always like "no....... but I've tried sterling silver... and it didn't work ..." like. I don't know how this narrative about sterling silver somehow got so strong but when they put pins in your fucking legs when you snap your leg in half are those pins made of sterling silver or are they made of implant grade titanium or surgical steel????????? HELLO. HI. YOU MIGHT BENEFIT FROM TRYING IMPLANT GRADE TITANIUM I AM JUST SAYING

[notbrucewayne48]

"aphobia doesn't exist"

bitch literally not that long ago an aroace youtuber animator was insulted by almost half of its community for being it

[forgettable-au]

FORGETTABLE-AU (page 82-85)

THAT LAZYBONES!!

[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]

[captain-krow-drozdov]

Everyone Except For Siffrin Is Looping Au Except Someone Wishes That Siffrin Knew Everything There Was To Know About The Loops And Subsequently Accidently Replaces Their Non-Looping Siffrin With Post Game Canon Siffrin And They Only Find Out Cause Siffrin Gets The Memory Of Back In The Fucking Building Again.

[burr-ell]

[erme-maererme]

this may come off as nitpicky but please. even magic does not look like dragon age magic in veilguard. it's too sci-fi. where are all the dark mysterious ruins with runes and veilfire that make you wonder about what they once were. why am i suddenly removing force fields with lazers. (it came to me suddenly that you also can't tell at all by looking at the ruins in arlathan what these buildings used to be for. because surely it wasn't just to randomly store a chest or a sole bridge-summoning crystal). bellara is also a mechanic and not even a little bit mage now (see all the "tinkering"). and why does minrathous have a speaker system. surely there are ways to depict an oppressive magical state that do not require putting modern technology into your fantasy world. although i see how it may become a problem when you forget what even phylacteries are (you have to destroy lucanis's "blood" instead while breaking him out). and it does look flashy that all the companions have at least some kind of magical abilities and that magic is used creatively, however i'm sorry but thedas is also not that magical. in previous games even when warriors or rogues got special abilities, they were tied to them being unique to the character (eg fenris) and you still could have regular people in your party, most rogues/warriors that you would see fight have been regular people, and this makes the impression of the presence and use of magic in thedas drastically different from the previous games.

somehow the exaggerated design instead of realism has been less jarring for me than this storytelling emptiness of the design in the end. but buildings float now i guess

[lilacandladybugs]

Studying for my calc 3 exam and I had a nightmare that I was trying to solve something weird like x²+ 4x + 9 = e^x² + e and I don't remember what my strategy was but you know natural logs were involved. My professor walks by looks at my paper and goes " oh in this situation e is actually a variable" and I was so mad I woke up

[lunarcrown]

Ren getting besieged on both sides by two museum curators fighting for him? Honestly he’s having the BEST DAY EVER!!!

Comm for @philip-the-nickel !! Drawing my huge Ren design next to the even BIGGER Cleo design made Cub so comically small GDHD but what he doesn’t have in height, he makes up for in pure rizz~~~~

[lazylittledragon]

Heya, feel free not to answer if this is uncomfortable, invasive or you just don't want to :)

I'm a trans guy and I'm, after top surgery, hoping to get laurel wreaths tattooed over the scars with florograpgy accents.

Do you have any advice for someone who's never had a tattoo before? Anyways to deal with pain, common courtesies for the tattoo artist, how the actual session goes, etc.?

Love ya,

Quimble

THAT'S A GREAT IDEA also absolutely!!!

don't stress about it or worry about being 'too much', for someone's first one i will talk through every single thing i'm doing and there are no stupid questions or too many concerns. also don't worry about twitching/flinching, it's not your fault and we know how to work around it

your artist should never make you feel bad about ANYTHING!! you can move the stencil as many times as you want and we don't care about your body or what you look like. if you need to take a break it's fine, if you need numbing spray it's fine. i would honestly rather slightly inconvenience myself than make you uncomfortable. as long as you aren't intentionally wiggling around the entire time or being a dick to the artist, you're all good.

yes it is going to hurt but it probably won't be as bad as you think it will be. when i got my first one i really hyped myself up and was very underwhelmed by the pain aksddfjfdj

bring something with you like a book or headphones if you need a distraction (as long as the tattoo placement allows it). i'm quite chatty most of the time but if you want a quiet session/no smalltalk you can ask for that

the actual session will go something like: show up, look at the design, make any changes if you want, test it out for sizing, put the stencil on and make sure you like it, then start the tattoo. afterwards they'll go through all the aftercare with you and either put on second skin (a film that sticks to your skin and protects the tattoo) or wrap it in clingfilm

if they haven't specified when you book the appointment then ask if it's cash/card/paypal etc and if it's cash, try and get it out BEFORE the tattoo appointment (just a time saving thing). also tipping is never expected but always Extremely appreciated :))

please please PLEASE tell us if you don't like the design/want to change the placement etc. personally i would be mortified if i knew someone didn't like what i'd done and didn't feel comfortable telling me. it's there forever so i want you to like it!!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Hate when the random pain is in the place of An Organ and you need to wonder if it's a Hospital Situation or not

[leroibobo]

really do not think people understand the extent to which palestinian sites/landmarks (especially muslim ones) were destroyed, beginning in 1948 until now, even in cities. the oldest extant mosque in jaffa (al-bahr mosque) was built in 1675, even though islam came there in the 7th century