#probably but like what joy would that bring to me?
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So I just saw wicked and I desperately need something with Fiyero having his sights set not on Glinda but Glinda’s brother y/n
Y/N Upland always knew that he was different. From a young age, he realized that he didn't fit in with the rest of his family, and not just because he was attracted more to boys than girls. When he was born, Y/N was given the rare gift of ice and snow, bringing great promise to the Upland name.
His mother and father tried to turn his talent into something that would make Y/N think he was better than the rest of the people of Oz, but Y/N didn't want that. He just wanted to be normal. That's why he made himself scarce as much as possible. He dressed in normal clothing and he preferred to be alone, instead of playing with other children his age. Then came Galinda, the pride and joy of the Uplands. Galinda was beautiful and had a certain way of getting whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted. The biggest difference between Y/N and his sister… he chose books. She chose looks, and it was certainly working out better for Galinda than Y/N.
She was beloved by all in Gillikin Country. The one everyone thought would succeed, whereas Y/N, would be the first ever person to disgrace his family as the ‘Upland Freak of Nature.’ And maybe they were right. To an extent. The cost of powers always came with a price, and even though Y/N was powerful, he was very bad at controlling them. It was one of the main—if not the most important -- reason to attend Shiz University to gain a better understanding of his powers, and how to properly control them. Unsurprisingly, Galinda was also majoring in sorcery.
That's how he and Galinda arrived on a pink boat to Shiz University, Galinda practically bouncing with excitement. Her pink outfit was pressed and crisp as her nails. “Oh, Y/N! I simply can't wait to attend Madame Morrible's sorcery seminar. I just know I'm going to ace it.” She flashed pretty white teeth that hurt Y/N’s eyes. He pulled his sparkly blue cape over his shoulders. “I'm sure you will, and maybe, just maybe, you'll be able to help me with this.” He made a small snowflake dance on the palm of his hand before closing it.
“Of course, brosicle.” Galinda laughed.
Once they were close enough to the school, Galinda stood on the back of the boat and sat down on her luggage, looking like a queen on her throne. A few students in blue and brown uniforms waved to them as Galinda waved back. Y/N looked down at the water until they were docked. Stepping off the boat, Galinda and her ten thousand pieces of luggage were greeted by their mother and father at the docks.
“Oh, we're so proud of you!” Their father said, as he and their mother gave Galinda kisses. “Thank you. I love you. Just remember, it's not goodbye. It's farewell.” Galinda told them.
“We love you.” Their mother said, finally taking notice of Y/N. “Oh, and you too, sweetie. You'll be good. Probably not as good as your sister, but good enough.” She said.
“Wow. Thank you, mother. Your words of reassurance melt my heart.” Y/N said, tone sarcastic.
Arduenna Upland looks at his son. “You make sure to look after Galinda, Y/N. See to it that she's comfortable, and well taken care of.”
“Of course, father. I wouldn't dream of disappointing you and mother again for the what? Sixtieth time?” He said.
“Just don't do anything to make trouble.” Arudeena said. He looks at Galinda and smiles with happiness and pride. “Have all your kisses? And you will write?”
“Yes. I love you. Sad time. Miss you already.” Galinda said.
“Popsicle board the boat.” Y/N said.
“They are going to miss me so much.”
“Us.”
“Right. That's what I said. Us.” Galinda said.
…
“Attention, students! It is my honor to announce that Fiyero Tigelaar of Winkie country will be filling out our student body. Having transferred from the Royal Winkie Academy. Please help him feel welcome. Without making direct eye contact.”
That's how Y/N and all of the student body at Shiz found themselves in the courtyard by the fountain, waiting for some spoiled Prince from Winkie country. Y/N to suppress the urge to roll his eyes as the Prince rode in on a horse. A blue horse. How original. Lines of male and female suitors were watching as the Fiyero walked passed, his black boots echoing against the ground. Some winked at him, while others twirled their hair in hopes of catching the Prince’s attention. He seemed unbothered.
Fiyero had light brown hair with blonde streaks on it. He wore a tailored navy blue suit with golden trimmings. He headed towards the bulletin board and asked a gawking male student to move as a faculty member checked out his ass. Y/N rolled his eyes from his position across from where Fiyero was. He has been studying with Madame Morrible and another student named Elphaba. He was currently reading a book about the history of ice magic in Oz as he watched Galinda swipe a book from a nearby student, and tried to pretend to be uninterested.
“Are you looking for something?” Galinda asked. She flips her blonde hair dramatically. “Or…someone?”
“No, I was…” Fiyero starts, but stops when his eyes look past Galinda and looked at Y/N.
Y/N frowns. Why was Prince McDimples looking at him like that?
“Sorry…what was I doing?” Fiyero asked.
“How would I know?” Galinda shrugged.
“Maybe it was that young man over there.” Fiyero smiles in Y/N’s direction. Galinda follows his gaze and frowns. “That's Y/N. My brother.”
“Brother you say? Well, I fancy I should meet him as well, don't you agree?”
“I guess.” Galinda pouted as Fiyero had eyes for Y/N, but her.
#x male reader#male reader insert#male x male#fiyero tigelaar#wicked#wicked 2024#fiyero tigelaar x reader#jonathan bailey#bi#gay#lbgtq
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Hello there! I've just come from ao3 and I've spent basically the entirety of the last two days reading the entirety of TTSBC, *inhale* AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH OH MY GOSH YOU'RE AN INCREDIBLE WRITER YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I'VE ENJOYED READING THIS AND ALSO THERE'S SO MUCH OF IT!!!
Seriously the fact that you manage to write so much and so well is incredibly impressive and I really admire you for it
Also I don't know how to bring across how much I LOVE your worldbuilding. It's one of my favourite things to pick up on as a story progresses, and the world you've created is so vivid and facinating and beautiful
Also I feel the need to grumble a teensy tiny bit about the cliffhanger with Grian- sorry, CuteGuy- getting injured becuase that was evil. I mean he was shot?? By whom??? It's probably thanks to that new head of Council (what was his name?)
Literally obsessed with Flower Husbands btw, their relationship is so sweet, and I've loved watching them progress from pining crushes to early relationship and having to work around the things that they don't know/understand to living together and slowly working out their issues (excited to see Scott's skeletons being tackled more btw) and being so cute and the poppy earrings and the trip to the undercity and the constant reassurances and- *wails distantly* It's so good.
And while we're in a ranting mood, how about Treebark and how Martyn (mirroring Scott) wanted more but didn't pressure Ren with anything because he understood he needed time and also (again mirroring Scott) decided he wanted to put the dagger down and give Ren all the roses. How he tried so hard to keep it together when he literally stumbled across the undercity and spontaneously had to (didn't technically, he chose to) go through the whole "meeting the (terrifying) family thing" because it was important to Ren. How Ren's first instinct was to protect him, even though he really didn't know how Martyn would react, and he was so scared it would be bad, and-
Or I could ramble on about Doc and Etho and how beautiful their relationship is, with all the crazy things they manage and do from day-to-day, and their darling Pesky Birds and Little Spark. There's a very unique feeling I get when I read how their early days in the depths were, it's so heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time, and I can't help but love it.
Or I could give you a paragraph about Grian and Scar and how their secrets and double lives unravelled, albeit messily in places, and how now there's just love, even though they haven't said it out loud (ahem, evil, evil cliffhanger) yet, and working around their differences and struggles, and cookies, and the coffee that Scar makes them in the mornings, and the shiny three-ringed binder, and-
I could go on about the under-city, this world under the surface, both dangerous and beautiful. Or Grian, Pearl and Jimmy and how much they mean to each other, absolute chaos and unwavering support. Or our wonderful, loving, chaotic family of six (yes, six, Tango for the love of god you're part of it too even if your relationship with them looks different), Tango and Zed and their issues that they probably really need get sorting out, Cleo and Bdubs (gods that one where they met healed and broke me in equal measure), the Empires Family (they're so dear to me), Nature Wives(I loved how they met), etc, etc, etc.
I could keep going, but I won't in this already super long ask (sorry about that by the way, wasn't really intended). I may rant in the future, if you'd like to hear it
Needless to say, the brainrot has gotten to me and I'd like it to stay please and thank you.
Sorry again for how incredibly long this turned out to be, but I hope it fulfills it's purpose and brings you joy <3 Have a good timezone!
Oh my stars thank you thank you! I'm so glad you enjoy my work so much I love the rambles! It's always so cool to me to see what parts of my stories stand out to people! Please never apologize for the rambles!!!
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Hi, I'm someone who's interested in making a long-fic but just been struggling to do so. Alot of it just cause I really I'm not confident in my ability to write it well or that people will read it. Even though Neon Void was your first fic (I think) you managed to not only reach so many, but tell a story so deep and personal and moving that every time I re-read a snippet I find myself wanting to read a whole chapter.....and then the entire series.
If I can be so bold to ask, how did you do it? How did you take Neon Void and make it? What kept you from giving into the voices within and without that tell you to give up? How did you make sure the story was the best it could be. If you could go back, what would you do differently? What strategies would be best for someone who also wants to do a longfic?
Sorry if it's alot.
First, thank you so so much. It makes me super happy to hear that you thought it was moving and enjoy reading it!!
and don’t be sorry!! I’m super flattered that you wanted to ask me such a cool and thought provoking question!! Gunna hide most of this answer under a read-more as I get a little autobiographical, but in short:
You must be your own biggest fan
I’ll be honest— I had NO idea so many people would read my fic. The amount of positive feedback has blown me away and I couldn’t be more thankful for how nice the TMNT fandom has been to me (and my sister!!)
And you’re right! Neon Void WAS my first fic I ever published!! But I’ve been writing every day since I was a tween. I just love to write. But even then, I was nervous to post. No one except my closest friend had EVER read my writing before. I wasn’t sure if anyone would read it, or even like it since it was kind of a wacky premise.
But also in a way, it was okay if no one else read it, because I liked it. And that’s kind of the secret sauce to it all.
I have never, ever written anything this long before. Originally, TNV was going to be like, ten chapters max. I have no idea it would evolve into a nearly 30 chapter fic. And i think there were several factors that contributed to that.
First, I was utterly and totally obsessed with my own AU. When i started daydreaming about certain scenes over and over, i knew i had to write it. Being so invested in my own story was the biggest factor in actually finishing it. Which sounds so obvious, but the thing is I have a tendency to think of new AUs constantly. (Sometimes even daily.) The fact I kept revisiting this one was a sign that if i wanted to write it, now was the time.
Second, and this is piggybacking off of that last confession of always daydreaming new AUs, i knew i was on a personal timer. If i was going to do this, I had to make sure I did it. So i gave myself a goal of trying to post on a rough schedule to keep myself accountable.
(But remember!!!! It's just fanfiction!!! you never, ever have to put that kind of expectation on yourself! You don't need a posting schedule. You don't even need to finish. I personally pushed myself so hard to see it through because for years I told myself that if i was ever going to post fanfiction, i HAD to finish. It's okay if you don't!! I would never ask a writer or an artist to slog through something that doesn't bring them joy anymore. Because at the end of the day, fanfiction is meant to be fun!!)
BUT
Here's a bit of a confession. I didn't want to give up on it because it brought me a lot of joy during a rough year. I found myself sneaking on my phone at work to write a paragraph or two whenever I had the chance. I would think about it 24/7. I was in love with the story I was making up and looking forward to writing helped get through some not so Cowabunga times. I know posting your work is super intimidating-- and you might be tempted to stop-- but remember, if it makes you happy-- even for a while-- it's worth it. TNV was making my days a bit brighter even before I started posting it.
Which leads to my next confession-- and this is probably the biggest reason I was able to actually pull it off with a posting schedule:
I had already written 50%-60% of TNV before I even posted chapter 1.
And that was on purpose for several reasons. One, I was having so much fun planning easter eggs and planning long-term foreshadowing bits. Second, it was a test to see if this AU was really rotting my brain enough that I wanted to spend a lot of time writing it. By the time I had a lot written and scenes I was super eager to get to, I knew I wanted to post it. But having a bulk of it already written was a huge reassurance in trying to maintain my posting schedule. (But again, that was just my style! You can hit the ground running if you'd like, start and then pause for a while to figure things out-- whatever works best for you!!)
But even when i was insanely obsessed with my own AU, it still took a lot of time and energy to write. There will be times you will find yourself trudging through bridging scenes to get to the scenes you actually wanna write and it's sooooooooo haaaaaaaaard. BUT!!! It's worth it!!! Getting through it and seeing how it sets up the exciting part just right is soooooooo satisfying.
As for making sure the story was the best it could be??? I'm not sure!! Because there were definitely times I went whining to my sister and best friend about certain plot points or scenes, worried it wasn't good enough. There were a LOT of times a scene or idea just didn't feel right. Heck, a lot of chapters ended up in a different order than when I originally started writing!! The lesson I learned throughout the whole thing is that the original idea doesn't have to be absolute. Sometimes rearranging the scenes is just what you need!
But when i was REALLY struggling, I'd find myself referring back to the original source. It was what inspired a fanfic after all! Sometimes taking a step back and reevaluating each character's personality helped me shape the scene into something that felt better. Other times I had to step back and remind myself about what was actually important to the story. (Example: originally, I had no idea how to get Donnie to the hidden city by himself. At first I tried to think of some lore on the mask to give Donnie a reason to go investigating Void... but it didn't feel right. The mask wasn't important. Not even Void was the most important thing to Donnie at the time. Leo was. And that helped me sort of get rid of the loosey-goosey idea of giving a complicated back story to the mask that made the story feel muddled.)
But even then, I wasn't sure if certain moves were the best they could be! I was always worried (and continue to be) that I poured too much into descriptions, or spent too much time talking about emotions with too little action. Or that I overuse phrases. But so long as each chapter made me happy, I figured readers would enjoy them too.
If I could go back and do something different... I wouldn't have goofed with Leo's kraang parasite adaptation in Mad Dog Part 2: Prom. I was trying to make his parasite enter an obvious 'stage 2 boss battle' look, but later I realized I didn't like how I described it lol.
But!!! I will confess, I'm no saint-- when i started getting lovely comments, it helped pour gas on the fire to keep going. And that's why I'm so thankful for every comment or doodle or ask sent my way. You guys are amazing and helped me get the fire under my ass to keep going, even when things were really hard.
I know it sounds so corny and like a cop-out answer, but ultimately, it's YOUR personal investment in YOUR story that is the secret sauce!!! So long as your interested in it, it won't feel so impossible to write a long fic. There will be challenges (like there is with any project) but honestly?? If you're head over heels for your own story, it will be fun and fulfilling. Even if you don't finish-- so long as it made you happy, that's what matters the most. (Again, that's so cheesy... but just like Master Leonardo tells Leo, 'cheesiness makes the best pizza pies in life'.)
Thank you again so much for this fun ask-- and I believe in you! You've got this. Have fun, enjoy writing, and have confidence in your work, because it makes YOU happy, and that's the greatest thing a story could be.
#LONG SPEECH AHOY!!!!#blasting you with my heart beam u got this friend 💗💖🩵💕💞💗🩵❤️#waaaa this ask was so thought provoking and fun to answer THANK YOU!!!#i know it feels scary and intimidating but i believe in you!!!#TNV asks#tnv spoilers
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The school of good and evil but make it sterek
#oh noooo#scott getting dropped off in the evil school because of his shallow ideas of good#this being a more nuanced examination of Scott’s morality than the actual show#stiles gets to be a Prince#poor guy would be so confused#holding a sword and accidentally stabbing the teacher probably#his arrow would fly true#ly to wherever it felt like going#he just hits his mark in a roundabout way#or he's too afraid to shoot#and Derek#Derek’s over there as what#tedros???#omg#prince derek whose mother is basically werewolf king arthur#and whose sisters are also at the school harassing the hell out of him because Laura and Cora bring me joy#or not idk how serious i want this to get#oh no#true love's kiss is broship#sciles brotp#except scott in the school of evil#hmmmm#teen wolf#sterek
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colored a sketch from yesterday
#my art#pokemon#pmd oc#toto#chimichang#infernape#feraligatr#hero/partner#hero x partner#i actually rlly liked how the sketch turned out yesterday lol otherwise i woudln't have colored it#friend said this is what love looks like.. that made me so happy. it means a lot that ppl enjoy this art#even if it's not fully original? idgaf#like im glad ppl are like YAYYYY LOVE WINS and not WHYY ARE YOU DFAWING THESE POKEMON TOGETHER#it is kinda funny seeing it without context i suppose. technically there is no context actually. i havrn't fully Made it#but i enjoy them together so much. brings me joy personally#so comforting. idk. my type of relationship i guess HAHSHJS#my water/fire duo loving ass back when i was a kid would probably be eating my fanart up if she stumbled upon it#that's cute to think about <33#totochimi
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Hm.
#vent#tw vent#vent in the tags#screaming in the void#okay so.#I know I don't post regularly#and maybe it's because I switch fandoms a lot but#I just wish my art would be reblogged more#and I know that it's silly and I'm probably being annoying by saying this#but it just feels really discouraging for me to post something and get a maximum of 7 notes - if I'm lucky - most if not all of which#are likes. and don't get me wrong!! I really appreciate the likes! it's good and I'm glad you like my art!!#but this site lives off of reblogs - sharing things that you like onto your own blog so that others who could potentially also like this#can find it and share it perhaps onto their blogs#if there are only likes then nobody else gets to see it and it eventually fades into the background and get lost.#I tried reblogging my own art from a while ago cuz I thought maybe that would help but. it didn't change anything. it's still all likes#if any engagement happens at all. it's frustrating because it makes me feel like what I post isn't worth being shared.#like it's not good enough. which I know! realistically is not the case but! that doesn't stop me from feeling like it#I don't know what I'm trying to say with this. I'm not trying to force anyone or guilt trip them into reblogging#of course not. no one is obligated to do anything I just. wish more people reblogged my art because yea. I *draw* for myself#but I do *post* it with the intention of it being seen and appreciated by others#that it might bring them as much joy seeing it as it did me creating it#I'm just tired#if you've read this far thank you. I really appreciate you. I love you and I hope you have a really good day <3
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As it turns out, there are still few things that make me as happy as posting a fic/chapter hour(s) past midnight, switching off my laptop and basking in the glow of my silly little creation the next morning at work. <3 I will not be depriving myself of it again.
#rant in the tags so probably ignore those#I spent so long thinking that if maybe I pushed myself just a little more I would finally find Peace#but I did push myself past any limits for other people - the majority of them not deserving it but denanding it of me - and all I got of it#was misery and lack of any joy in life#so going forward I will not be doing that#I will be doing things that bring me joy and that I'm looking forward to#it really takes being pushed to the absolute limits of what you can take to realise that people are right#and you can't hate yourself into being a person you love#and that led to the realisation that I don't need to hate myself at all#because now I have people in my life who want to hear what I have to say without treating it as a nuisance#or some sort of blabbered out insanity#it's a little bittersweet; realising it could have always been like this#but it is now#and that's opened for me the possibility to go back to doing things I was depriving myself from because I was wasting all my energy#on trying to please my way into the approval of people who will never give it to me#just like they haven't since I was a child#so essentially fuсkallthat#I'm enjoying myself again#personal shit#fanfic#rant#just in the tags but still
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Platonic sebezra, circus au?
Oh-ho-ho I did NOT expect this prompt to take root the way it did. Ahem. But here's a little ficlet that doesn't even begin to touch the depths of brain rot you've given me
“You’re the new tightrope walker, right?”
Sabine didn’t look up from lacing up her shoes as she replied, “Looks like it.”
This wasn’t where she’d expected to be— a circus in the middle of nowhere, barely breaking even. Clearly, it wasn’t as popular as it used to be. Everything made that clear, from the worn out waistcoat that the ringmaster had been wearing when he hired her and the threadbare costumes hanging on a rack near her, to the fact that the tent was still nearly empty, and it was fifteen minutes until show time.
But she’d gotten stuck, and she needed the money. And luckily, she was good at more than one thing. Tightrope walking would be easy.
Rising, she turned towards the arena— and froze, coming face to face with a lion.
Her instinct was to scream, her second to run or fight. But instead, Sabine deliberately tensed her muscles, feeling the panic race through her, silently counting to five. When she reached five, she let out a long exhale, then lifted an eyebrow at the orange clad boy standing behind the lion.
“Let me guess,” she said. “Lion tamer?”
He grinned. “How’d you guess?” With a quick whistle, he called the lion back, and it settled next to him, looking like nothing so much as an over large cat. “I’m Ezra, and this is Jasmine.”
“Sabine. This how you greet all your new coworkers?”
Shrugging, Ezra said, “Only the ones who can handle it. And it looked like you could. Besides, it’s a good test of who’s going to stick around.”
Sabine had no intention of sticking around. This job would, hopefully, get her enough money to make it to her next destination, and then she would move on.
But for now, she just nodded. “Looks like I passed.”
“Looks like it,” Ezra said with a grin. “Welcome to Circus Spectres.”
#thanks for the ask!!#star wars rebels#swr#sabine wren#ezra bridger#writing stories is a kind of magic too#YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THE WAY MY BRAIN LATCHED ONTO THIS#listen. they're a struggling circus because they owe people money but they're still trying to inspire wonder and hope and joy#and do what they love#ryder azadi is the ringmaster (the last place he worked didn't survive and there are all kinds of rumors but the spectres took him anyways)#and kanan is a fire eater (partially because. reasons. and partially because of my childhood obsession with dustfinger)#and hera is a trick rider! and zeb is the trapeze artist (who used to have a partner that died and now he refuses to work with anyone else)#and sabine would help them bring life back to this place and ANYWAYS#i have a shocking amount of ideas about this au and backstory#and how everyone here is lost or broken but they all wound up together#(probably thanks to hera)#like i said. a LOT of thoughts#*whispers to myself* don't lose self control and write more don't lose self control and write more#so uh. if anyone wants to send me another prompt. and they don't know what au to choose#you probably shouldn't enable me like that#I DIGRESS#swr circus au
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Baka and Test fan spotted! /pos
Hideyoshi was such a gender for me back in the day, saw a cute hc that he and his sister are twins but he's trans
Also the intro is a banger
I know /pos is Positive but god damn if there isn't a worse call out than Baka and Test fan.
Anyway I'm a hardcore Toshimitus Kubo defender he's one of my favorite characters of all time like I'm talking Top 5 Fictional Character's ever and I would kill everyone on this hell site and then myself if anything happened to him
#Baka and Test#It's such a big comfort show to me it brings me so much joy#It's probably the worst anime I've ever seen#Anyway Hideyoshi and Yuuko ARE twins? That's canon.#I guess you meant like. Identical rather than Faternal?#Anyway I disagree Hideyoshi is a Cis Man#And YUUKO is Transgender!#But I do adore every Trans and NB person who latched onto him in their youth#What a time to be alive#Also both intros and all the outros go stupid hard would agree
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you know I think probably people in ooo didn’t Suddenly start loving fionna and cake fanfics so much as they knew how much ice king wanted them to like them, and are trying to connect with simon through the thing they remember he (ice king) liked a lot. something he MADE!
#like dirt beer guy probably just appreciates simon’s work as an author in general and wants his help and input#but also is like ohh uyeah I read those stories back when I was first starting out (didn’t really get them? but) they were rly somethin!#an I know how much you loved them at the time I mean you used to have author readings at the library and everything you were very successfu#you also wrote those dry science books I think are technically marvelous but really difficult for me to parse um. but anyways.#connect with me about the series you clearly loved for a long time and found a lot of success with#it brought you so much joy dude you used to giggle every time you tried to read it to us (after holding us hostage to do so I might add but#anyways. sorry. thinking.#that line about Jake bringing them all around to the stories tracks though. he kinda liked being derivitavely. what did he say.#and also would love connecting with ppl through media and their personal creations#adventure time#fionna and cake#o
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.
#word vomit alert!!!!!#i love solo trips out bc i get to do whatever i like without having to make conversation with people but omg.......#this trip has evoked alarming levels of loneliness and melancholy for some reason#maybe it's got something to do with just seeing Too Many People at once... and seeing people live their lives and enjoy company#n then i see myself n while i see an independent carefree person who's at peace with herself there's also a tinge! of! melancholy n pining..#for companionship... for easy conversations... for connections!#i was also listening to Fourever while roaming around aimlessly and when Happy started playing i immediately teared up#i think i just have too many things on my mind djskfksmmdskkd i need to get back to journaling n meditating. too much anxious energy#also during dinner i sat next to a couple who seemed to be on their first date post dating app conversation. n it reminded me of my prev rs#dkfkfnmsfndnmdm i wouldn't call it ptsd bc they were good memories but personally i would most likely never use a dating app ever again.....#it's just too much pain having to talk through icebreakers n get to know each other with the topic of Dating already looming in the bg#n it's just a lot of Work for a first date you know??? anyway i'm tired of relationships. i would love organic platonic companionship tho#like i would love more friends. just not a Partner shdkfjdndndmd#but with that said !!!! it's sometimes lonely being single. but the thing is. there's no company that i'd prefer more than my own#i bring too much joy and peace to myself that i feel like it's almost impossible for anyone to meet those standards#it's very much like that tiktok where op said her app guy asked her who his competition was and she answered: Myself. your competition is me#and that was just the truest thing i've seen#also met an unkind worker at dinner. wasn't directed at me but the energy he gave off was just so Bad that it ruined my evening KDKDJSKDK#like . how can someone be so miserable n unkind n mean to the people around him??? as if they aren't deserving of respect... it boggles me#n so todays trip has been so . strange. i felt sad! witnessed unkindness! i felt a little lonely!#i unknowingly self-reflected a lot n probably spiralled into a rumination cycle! thought abt work n how it seemed like there was No Way Out#but !! it is what it is!!!
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i currently watch 18 of the hermits and am constantly stuck between wanting to watch more hermits and knowing i should probably drop a couple before i get a job again. but also like... what if i watched more anyway....
im too behind atm to actually add another pov, and i need to catch up on the life series too but like... man what if i just did it anyway. whos gonna stop me? no one. thats who. i will feed my own hyperfixation and no one can get in my way!!!!
if i do end up adding a new pov who would you recommend? i currently dont watch Xisuma, stress, false, wels, hypno, jevin, joe and doc
i also dont watch xb, but i tried to and i just cant get past the texture pack (it upsets me that i cant)
i get you so much .. idk how i have technically two jobs (although they're very much part time) and am in school full time and still somehow manage to keep up with 26 different povs or. however many it is.
out of all the people you don't watch i'd probably recommend xisuma the most, i think his videos are super easy to watch even if you havent seen a lot of his content before. he has a great balance of building/redstone/interaction with the other hermits and his episodes are typically on the shorter side but he uploads regularly. i may be biased because i really really love his content but. i think he's great
also totally understand the issue w xb's texture pack lol, it's taken like 4 years of me watching him to adjust to it and i still don't like it buuut. i like his content enough to look past it... he's such a silly guy. although i do find that with quite a lot of his episodes i end up playing them in the background like a podcast rather than paying close attention to what's happening on screen. tbh if you watch keralis and beef you probably get quite a lot of xb content anyways so i wouldn't worry too much about missing out!!
#i think watching every pov is hardest at the start of any season because that's when everyone uploads at the same time#but it's actually not that hard to keep up with as long as you don't let yourself fall too far behind#i think if i took a break for more than a couple weeks it'd be really hard to catch up#i also don't watch anything else really .. i don't have a tv or any streaming service subscriptions#i listen to podcasts and a lot of music but i basically don't watch anything other than hermitcraft#i maybe spend like.. an hour a day watching minecraft? which sounds like a lot but#a lot of people easily spend that much time watching tv or scrolling tiktok or something so i guess it's just about balance#honestly hermitcraft just brings me so much joy i would choose that over anything else i could be doing on my phone#it's also easy to watch youtube while drawing which is what i spend most of my time doing#with a different job i can understand that it'd probably be much harder#like if my job wasn't freelance or if i was writing instead of drawing. idk#asks#horsemeatposting
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big write up on how my rhaegar is my own interpretation (and how behind i am on westerosi literature) coming soon to a dash near you.
#ooc. this week on kat valentine's hannibal.#[they’re just extremely personal to me and they make my heart warm and I’ve loved them since… god.#since the first time I read about them in got through dany’s words. I just went ‘I love them’ and never let go. I think I probably connect#heavily to the feeling like your life is based around sorrow and little more. and you’re struggling to find joy but sorrow is what you#-know-. so you can’t grasp a sense of joy or purpose in your true self. because you don’t have one. rhae? their true self is so fragmented#by prophecies and by shortcomings and failures and all the deaths put right on -their birth-.#they put all that on themselves for a sense of ego or self importance they just… didn’t have.#basically: rhaegar has deluded themselves into a lot but they’re also very tenacious about some as genuine beliefs.#but it’s… a study in how a sense of inadequacy can bring about unhealthy habits and obsessions. and how those things can overtake you.#the lyanna relationship is complicated and one i have to define but I think I would prefer#if it was just open and any lyannas who would like to write with me? I’m down to follow your lead. this goes for anyone close to rhae#really. the thing about them is it’s been admitted 100000 times they’re an ideal and hardly a person (and we never knew them IN LIFE)#so my characterization of rhae definitely leans on that display as asoiaf put it forth in the varied opinions on rhae.#they’re a big mixup of me and asoiaf and quite frankly a study in what it is to be burdened by tragedy from moment one and how that affects#an upbringing. how expectations do. I love them. I give my heart for rhae.]
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Is this my best comic ever?? Nope. Do I think I characterized either of these two particularly well in this comic?? Not really. Did I spend an unreasonable amount of time on it to the point that it would be a waste to not post it?? Yes, yes I did.
I really committed to this one, spent a lot of time on those backgrounds and treated myself to ample suffering with the perspective, which is not my strong suit but I am happy with how it ultimately looks. Yay perspective and background practice!!
(Tbh I shouldn't talk like I think this one sucks, I think I've just been staring at it for so long that my brain has decided it's not good and it's actually way better than I think it is, and honestly I am quite happy with it. The artistic process really is something, isn't it?)
The inspiration was basically me reminding... myself... to take breaks sometimes... by drawing for several hour stints during my only little bits of free time. Which totally tracks. Probably. But I've been rolling around in my brain this idea that Lambert is a very uptight people pleaser and anxious workaholic, but Narinder, at least since adjusting himself to the circumstances (which probably took at least a century, maybe two) has discovered the joys of self care, and has made an active effort to chill tf out. This has not made him any less terrifying to the cultists (save for Lambert's closest disciples), nor has it made him friendlier to really anyone but Lambert (and maybe his siblings), but he sure has found some serious peace of mind. That said, I can't place what his motivations are here. Perhaps he is secretly concerned about Lambert's sanity, because he doesn't want them to turn into what he was, or maybe he's just trying to steal away some quality time with his one and only friend, but regardless of the reason, I spent too much time on this for nobody to see it, dang it.
That said. Enjoy this silly little comic that I spent way too much time on, and I hope this silly comic brings you some joy today.
#cult of the lamb#cult of the lamb fanart#cotl#cotl fanart#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#cotl narilamb#narilamb#(like honestly narilamb is a qpr to me specifically and i intend this as such but this can easily be read as romantic as well tbh)#also we get some bonus jalala and rinor in this one!! and some bonus... implied leshycat. technically#not gonna tag those individually cuz there's just like. not enough of it for me to feel like those tags have any meaning#but they're here as a bonus. also jalala and rinor are fun to draw maybe i should make a mini comic just about them sometime#rambles aside pls enjoy this ridiculous comic that i spent an unreasonable amount of time on it was a joy to work on#and even tho its not my best comic ever i do love how it turned out it was such a good time
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I really should stop thinking about death every time I face any difficulties.
#why am I so pathetic it’s just unbearable#how do I even live like that#well apparently if you once have sucicidal thoughts you’ll have them forever#maybe I just need help…#or am I just dramatizing#either way it’s probably not normal#if I come to talk with someone they would never say that they think about dying on a daily basis#and you know what’s worst#is that I don’t even have the reason for it#I have family I have friends I have someone who would care#I have hobbies I have a big project that brings me joy#I have plans for the future#I’m recovering from my impairments#I have everything I never had in the past yet I feel more miserable than before#and I don’t understand why#I don’t understand why I can’t feel attached to my life I don’t understand why it takes me nothing to think about ending it#I don’t understand why I constantly need a reminder that there’s hope no matter what#I don’t understand why I can’t be one of these careless girls who love life and never overthink every instant of it#I don’t fucking understand what I’ve ever done to end up in this place#I’m fucking tired of living in the bottom and just occasionally see the light#when most of other people I know live their lives the other way around#with constantly seeing the light and just occasionally ending up in the bottom#I just fucking don’t understand and I’m so tired#ignore it I’m just being emotional and I can’t help it
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cringe? yes but my serotonin levels are skyrocketing
[ID: A series of images showcasing handmade miniature books. The first image shows the front cover of four of these miniatures. The second image shows the back covers. The third image shows one opened up, revealing a comic. The fourth image shows G3 Twyla Boogieman doll holding one of these books next to a small stack of them. /.]
I'm a little unhinged today so I had the genius idea of making mini books of some of the projects I would eventually like to publish online one day! I used MyFroggyStuff's faux pages book printables as a base. I only did four as a test run and they're so cute! They make me so happy and more motivationed to keep pushing. I did write up very brief synopsises and they're surprisingly legible irl
I mainly used art I already had (including ones from years ago as you can see lol) but even then, it fills me with insurmountable joy.
#personal#miniatures#image description#doll#twyla boogieman#book miniature#ocs#original characters#my ocs#no twyla would not read my stories lol#honestly she'd probably not be interested lol#she is just my current blorbo#and also autism#ok but smth like this would be PERFECT for an artist/writer#I had recent thoughts of like what I really wanted for christmas and it kinda circled to my projects which bring me joy
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