#pink kilts

[kiltedcubfll]

[ghw-archive]

Vivienne Westwood satin kilt, 'Le Flou Taille' collection A/W 2003/04,

[thataveragejo]

On Wednesday We Wear Pink, @verillasclothing Kilts That Is. #kilt #style #mensfashion #mensstyle #menswear #fashion #wednesday #pink #rosa #estilo #hair #hairy #socks #chest #beard #beards #mustache #thoughts #mood #vibe #goodvibes #goodlife #instagood #instadaily #fyp #goodmorning #buenosdias #buongiorno #bomdia #gutenmorgen https://www.instagram.com/p/Cm_le5ZrEkl/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[bluury2]

LEGEND IN A KILT LEGEND IN A KILT LEGEND IN A KILT AAAAAAAAA SCOTTISH CLOTHING SCOOOTTTLAAAAANDDDD FORREEEVEERRRR FREEEEDOMNMNM🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

They went camping and forgot to bring suplies for a halloween party, so the boys are improvising.

...and then here come Wild a Hyrule with their scavenged halloween masks

;)

[distinguishedvulture]

Scottish Fold by Nakanoart

[codfishing]

Pairings: ghoap x single mom!reader

TW: just a fluffy meet-cute on Halloween

You were starting to lose hope as you tried to find a neighborhood that actually participated in Halloween; it was your favorite holiday and you wanted to make sure your kiddo’s first trick-or-treating experience was a good one.

But you found a bustling neighborhood and your spirits lifted as you parked your car along the edge, happily unbuckling your daughter and making your way into the neighborhood.

Your daughter was fascinated by everything, and was surprisingly unfazed by the decorations, including the scarier ones, and she was especially interested in the costumes of the people milling about the neighborhood.

She was especially interested in the man dressed as a skeleton sitting at the end of his driveway with another man whom you assumed was his husband dressed in a kilt.

You waited at the edge of the driveway and told your daughter what to say, and she immediately went up to the man in the skeleton costume, staring up at him silently as they both cooed over her Belle dress.

After a few moments you nervously called out, “Baby, it’s rude to stare. What do we say?”

“Thank you!” She said loudly, prompting another laugh from the two men and you take a couple steps forward, smiling.

“No no, sweetie, say ‘trick or treat’,” You corrected gently, smiling more as she held out her kitty cat bucket and repeated the words.

“It’s alright,” The man in the kilt said with a Scottish accent (you honestly were less surprised by the accent than you were the mohawk) as he grinned up at you.

He eyed you up and down as your daughter was preoccupied with running her fingers over his partner’s skeleton gloves, and the Scot asked, “No costume?”

You laughed nervously. “Didn’t have time to put one together. It’s not for lack of want, I promise.”

He hummed and smiled again, reaching out a hand. “I’m Soap, and this is my husband, Ghost.”

You took his hand and shook it as you introduced yourself too, raising an eyebrow after pulling away. “Interesting names.”

Ghost looked up then, shooting a playful glare at his husband before looking up at you. “He means Johnny and Simon.”

You laughed at that and you could see Simon’s cheeks lift under his balaclava adorned with a half-skull before he went back to having a small conversation with your daughter, making your heart flutter slightly.

“Want a treat too?” Johnny asked then with a grin. “We’ve got jell-o shots for the parents.”

“Ooh,” You sounded before hesitating. “Sure, one won’t hurt.”

Johnny stood up then and disappeared into the dark entryway of their house, reappearing moments later with two of the small containers. He handed one to you and you were about to tuck it away into your sweatshirt pocket when he scoffed playfully.

“Come on, bonnie,” He said, nodding towards you with a grin. “You don’t wanna be walking around with that all night, do you? Take it with me.”

With a sigh, you smiled and opened the shot, tapping the plastic container against his when he reached out and downing the jell-o shot while trying to ignore his tongue releasing the lime green jell-o from the plastic, though it was hard to as he kept his eyes on you while he did it.

You could feel your cheeks flushing slightly and were grateful for the darkness shrouding your pink face, handing the empty cup back to him when he offered.

“That’s a girl,” He praised, leaving you more flustered.

Another group of costumed kids came up and you immediately remembered where you were, crouching down next to your daughter.

“Come on, sweetie; there’s other kids who want a turn,” You said gently, reluctantly pulling her away from Simon with an apologetic smile.

Their eyes lingered on you as you bade them goodbye with a wave that they both returned, their smiles widening as your daughter waved as well and loudly said goodbye.

The short interaction lingered in the back of your mind as you walked through the neighborhood, making the rounds and ending up on the other side of the street after a while.

As you walked along towards the next house, you heard, “Oi, bonnie!”

Looking up, you realized you were across the street from Simon and Johnny’s house again, and Johnny was waving at you.

“Want another one?” He called out, his wide grin nearly glowing in the dark.

Your decision was made for you as your daughter pulled you towards the street, pointing towards them.

“‘S Simon!” She exclaimed excitedly and your heart melted, causing you to lead her across the street towards them. Though admittedly you weren’t complaining in the slightest by being around the two men again.

The large man crouched down, his smile obvious despite the mask hiding it. “Hi, sweetheart.”

Johnny moved to stand next to you after you paused, nudging another jell-o shot into your hand.

“Thanks,” You smiled before adding, “This is the last one though; I have to drive us back home.”

His eyebrows shot up in surprise. “You don’t live ‘round here?”

Shaking your head, you sighed and looked down at your daughter who was happily showing Simon the treats she had gotten so far.

“We don’t get trick-or-treaters at our apartment,” You explained, looking back up at Johnny. “And since it’s her first year, I wanted to make sure she had fun.”

Johnny blinked before grinning. “Well, let’s make it fun, eh?”

He moved to set down the large bucket of candy he had been holding and you stared in shock. “What?”

Straightening up, Johnny nudged Simon’s shoulder before looking back at you.

“Come on, there’s a street two blocks over that’s got more people,” Johnny explained as Simon stood up as well. “We’ll show you.”

Your brain put two and two together and you started stumbling over your words. “Oh, you don’t need to do that! I’m sure we can find it and I don’t want to be a burden—“

“Nonsense,” Simon said then, leaning down to pick up your daughter when she reached out her arms to him, surprising you since you were usually the only one she let pick her up. “If it’s the little one’s first time, we want it to be as fun as possible for her.”

You looked between the two men, but again your daughter decided for you as she started babbling to Simon, who turned his attention to her and started walking off holding her tiny hand in his.

Johnny grinned down at you and nudged you again, leading you after Simon who was happily carrying her as if he hadn’t just met her twenty minutes before.

As you walked through the neighborhood, you learned that both Simon and Johnny were in the military, and that they had actually returned from a mission earlier that day (“Just in time for Halloween but not enough time to really do costumes,” Johnny explained somewhat sheepishly).

You ended up telling them about your divorce (Simon showed he was still listening to the conversation by adding comments here and there despite your daughter monopolizing his attention as she led him up to houses with her as you and Johnny waited at the end of the driveways), and how it was just the two of you now since your ex-husband decided he wanted nothing to do with your daughter. Neither of the men said anything on that but you saw the look they shared of anger and something else that you couldn’t quite discern in the darkness.

Halfway down the new street, your daughter decided it was Johnny’s turn to help her and she reached out for him instead, and you had to suppress a giggle at Simon’s jealous huff as he handed your little girl over to the beaming Scotsman.

As Johnny and your daughter started walking, Simon fell in step with you. You found that he was much quieter than Johnny but was still a great conversationalist, slipping in puns and horribly funny dad jokes when he could. He told you about how he and Johnny met in their unit, and told you about their teammates while you listened intently. He listened just as intently as you talked about your own job, asking questions here and there that showed he was actually interested in your writing career, which made your heart flutter again.

“You know,” You started after a not-uncomfortable lull in conversation as you both watched Johnny chase your daughter through a yard. “For a man who likes dad jokes, you missed the perfect opportunity for your costume with your callsign being ‘Ghost’.”

Simon blinked before his mask lifted as he smiled again. “I figured that would be too obvious.”

“Well next year I expect the right costume,” You teased, nudging him playfully.

“Oh yeah? Next year I expect any costume from you,” Simon teased back, giving you an obvious look up and down.

“Yeah yeah,” You laughed, waving him off as he chuckled next to you.

Johnny had managed to wrangle your giggling daughter and carried her back towards you two, breathing hard from having to chase her.

“Bloody hell, I thought I was in shape until I had to chase a toddler,” He huffed, causing you to laugh hard.

You noticed your daughter starting to whine and after checking your phone, you realized it was definitely past her bedtime and you felt guilty for getting lost in conversation with them.

“Alright, I think it’s time to call it a night,” You announced reluctantly, turning back slightly in the direction of your car. “I need to get her home before she falls asleep on your shoulder.”

“Nah, it’s fine,” Johnny waved you off with a grin. “I don’t mind one bit.”

You smiled at that as they both followed you and you looked back at them, smiling fondly.

“I really do appreciate you two helping her out tonight,” I said gratefully. “I feel a little bad though about intruding on your night.”

“It’s fine, lovie,” Simon spoke up in a warm voice. “Couldn’t have asked for two better intruders.”

You couldn’t help but laugh slightly, still feeling a little guilty for highjacking their night. Your daughter was passed out on Johnny’s shoulder by the time you reached the car and he handed her off to you before stepping back with Simon.

As you buckled her into her carseat, you could hear Simon and Johnny conversing quietly behind you but you couldn’t catch any of what they were saying.

By the time you straightened up and closed the door, it was just Simon standing there and he chuckled at your questioning look.

“Johnny ran up to the house real quick,” He explained. “He’ll be back shortly.”

“Got it,” You said before smiling. “Thanks again, Simon. It was really wonderful meeting the two of you.”

He smiled under his mask and pulled you into a tight hug much to your surprise, but you returned it with a contented noise and briefly wondered if it would be weird to say you wanted to hang out with them again.

As he finally released the hug, Johnny jogged back up to you two and shoved something into your hand.

“Another treat for when you get home,” Johnny said with a wink before pulling you into a tight hug as well. “Drive safe, lass.”

You nodded and the three of you said your goodbyes before you got into your car, trying to not wake your daughter as you turned it on and started driving away.

It wasn’t until you were at the first stoplight that you looked at the ‘treat’ Johnny had given you, pausing when you realized there was a piece of paper taped to the top of the jell-o shot, and you opened it curiously.

The car behind you had to honk to get you out of your frozen state as you stared down at the note.

We hope to see you and the little one again soon, bonnie; call us when you want to be taken out for dinner—the new stepdads

[ghoap-first]

Simon and Johnny decided to keep with tradition for their wedding and not see each other before they walked down the aisle.

They had already done the paperwork to become the MacTavish-Riley’s, so for Simon it was a no-brainer to wear the MacTavish tartan on the day. The MacTavish’s were the closest thing to a family he ever had and he was proud to wear their tartan.

What Simon hadn’t planned on was Johnny seeing him and bawling so hard he could hardly see straight, or leaping into his arms and kissing him while whispering how beautiful he looked before their officiant could even open their mouth.

Simon deflected against his now extremely pinked cheeks by pushing Johnny into place and telling him that this isn’t how this works. Johnny could always see right through him, though, and smiled so brightly Simon thought he’d be blinded by the end of the ceremony. He was also incredibly soft for his goofy almost-husband and warmed nearly immediately.

If Johnny pulled Simon into a private room as soon as they had a moment alone and locked it to see if they both kept up with another tradition (what is under those kilts?), well that’s no one’s business but their own.

[briefalpacashark]

~Drunk Boys~

The boys from 141 get drunk and you have to pick them up.

Warning: Drunk, violence.

Parts inspired from New Girl. If you know you know.

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One lovely evening you sat in your little office space. The boys had headed off quite some time ago for a few drinks. Your usual Friday night outing didn't include you that time because of a few reports you had put off. It was pulling onto 1am when your phone started to ring. It was a new number you had never seen before.

“Hello, this is Y/N speaking,” you said.

“Hey uh doc?” It was Gaz voice that came through the call. 

“Gaz?” you asked.

“Who you talking to?” you could hear Jonny ask in the background.

“I'm talking to doc,” Gaz stated.

“Oh, why?” Jonny whispered.

“I don't know,” Gaz murmured back. It didn't take a detective to establish by their slurred tones that they were drunk.

“Gaz, why are you calling me from a random number?” you asked.

“I don't know. Our phones got wet,” he explained.

“Our?” you asked.

“Yeah Me, Soap, Ghost and Price,” he stated with a sassy tone, as if it was your fault for not knowing. 

“So you fucked you phones?” you asked.

“Yeah,” Gaz nodded.

“And you called me, why?” you asked. There was silence for a bit.

“Captain, why am I calling Doc again?” Gaz asked.

“Because we lost the fucking car and we need a lift back to base,” Price snapped in the distance.

“Because we lost the fucking car and we need a lift back to base,” Gaz tone was much calmer and sweeter than Prices. A small smile worked its way onto your face.

“Alright, ill be there soon. Where are you?” you asked, making your way to the door.

“Not at the base,” Gaz said.

“I know that Gaz. Where are you now?” It was like talking to a toddler.

“Oh, We're at McDonalds,” he said before the line went dead. There were three McDonalds in the town. You thought they would be at the one closest to the bar. You were right. You were about to pull into the car park when you paused. Alittle down the street, right under the McDonalds sign sat four blobs. Driving up to it, you slammed on the brakes at what you saw. 

Price was sitting with his arms crossed. His hat looked to have been ripped in half and then shakily put back together with some staples, a tuft of his hair sticking out the top. Next to him Ghost with a traffic cone on his head and one tucked in his lap as he sat cross-legged. He was hugging it, and the one in his lap had been drawn on, and made up to look like a person, with a hat and a bikini loosely tied around it. One of his jacket sleeves was missing as if it had been torn clean off. Jonny sat next to him shirtless, with a patch of hair missing from his chest. Over it a pink glittery 21st birthday sash. His mohawk sprinkled with glitter and a kilt. Gaz had left in a pair of jeans, he was now in a pair of pink booty shorts that you would place money on that had some word like bitch or booty on the back of bedazzled gems. A crown of beer cans ducked taped around his head compelled the fit. All about them, strewn across the floor was a variety of McDonald's food, ranging from ice-creams to nuggets. They were all happily munching away. And they were all missing their left shoe?

You got out of the car phone at the ready.

“Say cheese boys,” you called. Drunkenly, they all looked up in your general direction, taking a photo. You chuckled, pocketing your phone and hands as you looked over them all. Wondering what the hell happened to them. 

“Ah, it's doc. What are you doing here, lovey?” Jonny asked in excitement, throwing his hands to the air.

“I'm here to pick you boys up,” you said.

“Pah, no we're alright. We've still got to go to another bar. Ain't that right LT?” Jonny asked, waving you away.

“Aye. I want another lager,” Ghost stated defiantly.

“I think you boys have had enough. Just look at the state of ya,” you gestured to them. 

“Wow, body shaming. Shame on you Y/N,” Gaz slurred, shaking his head disappointingly.

“Your all wet. Each of you has a piece of clothing damaged and all of you haven't even made eye contact with me yet,” you explained. Instantly, they all turned to stare into your eyes.

“Bull shit,” Jonny hiccuped before taking a bite of his burger. 

“Sargent, Report,” Price spoke up. You paused, considering his words as he stared down at the road in front of him.

“Report sir?” you asked. He nodded, tipping forward ever so slightly. Your eyes widened. He was absolutely plastered. They all were. 

“Your all drunk as fuck,” you said simply, your sentence finishing in a bewilder chuckle. The boys could hold their liquer, hell you have ever seen Gaz and Jonny drunk. 

“Am not,” Jonnys offended tone had you laughing again.

“Of sorry. My mistake, your only eating ice cream burger because you want to,” you jabbed you fingers at the burger in his hands. The ice cream was dripping down his arms and it looked like he had stacked nuggets, chips and a shit ton of cheese into the mix.

“As a matter of fact I did want to,” he said moving his hand about, the contents of the burger slopping onto the ground.

“Awww,” Jonny whined.

“Five second rule bruv,” Gaz said reaching bow to pick up a handful of the mess reconstructing the burger and handing it back to Jonny.

“Thanks Gaz,” Jonny seemed genuinely thankful. You held back a gag as he moved it to his mouth.

“Don't eat that,” you warned. You sure as hell didn't want him getting sick of all the gems that were now thrown into the burger mix. 

“I'll do what I want to do, because I can do whatever I want to do because I can do it,” he slurred.

“Jonny you eat that burger and I'll never speak to you again,” you proposed the ultimatum. He paused, pondering for a moment.

“What if I drink it?” he asked.

“Your gonna drink a burger?” you asked raising an eyebrow.

“Aye,” he nodded confidently.

“I bet you a tenner you can't,” Price spoke up. The poor man looked to be dozing in and out of sleep.

“I'll take that bet,” Jonny said.

“Jonny that was on the road,” you pleaded.

“And?” he asked.

“Put it down,” you ordered sternly. With a grumble, he chucked the burger down like a toddler throwing a tantrum. The boys held back their giggles. You heard that right giggle. And it was stared by none other than the man himself. Price. He was giggling. The high-pitched noise sounded off coming from him.

“Ohhhhhhhh mums mad at you,” Gaz joked, nudging his side.

“Sod off,” Jonny grumbled.

“Alright where’s the phone you called me from?” you asked.

“Why?” Gaz questioned.

“Because you called me from a random number, which means you had someone else’s phone. By the state of you lot I wouldn't be surprised if you stole it,” you explained.

“Right, it's over there,” Gaz grabbed his thumb to the phone booth. You first thought they had called you from it, but when you noticed the little pink box, you walked up to it to get a closer look. It was an iPhone. In a pink case, it was cracked to kingdom come and they had somehow lodged it in the credit card reader. You tried tugging it out to no avail. What you did find was Gaz’s phone propped up on the little stand with his contacts open with your name and number on it. Deciding not to question the backwards thinking that led them there you pocketed Gaz’s phone, walking back to the boys.

“Alright, I want the truth ok. What happened?” you asked a little concerned.

“Meet up with some airforce boys. They tried to act all high and mighty,” Price shrugged.

“Said they could drink more than us,” Ghost added.

“We had to prove them wrong,” Jonny explained.

“And we did. But then they brought out, Um what was it called?” Gaz clicked his fingers. 

“Abstanance,” Jonny proclaimed proudly. 

“Absinthe?” you asked in shock.

“Hell yeah, drunk those fuckers under the table.” Ghost nodded.

“Dunk yourselves under the table by the looks of it. Why are you wet? And what the fuck happened to ya shoes?” you asked.

“The ducks were drowning,” Gaz stated simply.

“And there was a bar that takes your shoe when you start a tab. It's to prevent running out without payed your tab,” Jonny added.

“So you all rescued ducks and ran out on a tab?” you asked. The boys pondered for a moment realized how bad it sounded. 

“Yes,” Ghost nodded.

“No,” the rest of them said. 

“And only Ghost rescued the ducks, I fell in, Gaz tried to rescue me but couldn't and Price saved us both,” Jonny explained as if it fixed it all.

“You shouldn't have been hanging around ponds this drunk. It's dangerous,” you murmured.

“For your information, it wasn't a pond,” Gaz stated defensively.

“Oh yeah, what was it?” you cooed back.

“It was the fountain,” he pointed across the way into the park where a fountain was lit up. A knee deep fountain. 

“Right, get in the car. Come on,” the boys groaned.

“We can't,” Gaz said.

“And why not?” you asked.

“Cause,” he trailed off. “Legs an’t working,” he finished. The boys all gave him approving nodds thinking his excuse was to tire brilliance.

“Well, I guess I'll just help you. Come on,” you helped Gaz up first, sliding him into the back of the car. 

“I don't wanna go,” Jonny whined.

“I know big guy,” you cooed. Sliding him in next to Gaz, you shook your head when they started giggling. 

“Your turn,” you gestured Ghost up. 

“Am I under arrest?” he asked.

“What? No,” you shook your head.

“Oh really. Seemed like it.” his hint of sass had you pointing to the car. With a grumble he got up and walked to the car, slipping into the middle seat. You frowned, ducking your head to see the other door open, Jonny now sitting at the far side and Gaz nowhere to be seen. Looking back to the makeshift picnic, you saw him back at the phone booth.

“For fuck’s sake, Stay,” you order the two in the car. Walking up to him, you frowned as he held the phone up to his ear.

“What you doing Gaz?” you asked.

“Ringling Doc. She needs to come pick us up,” he said whole heartedly forgetting that you were there already. With a huffed you took him by the arms, pulling him back. You sighed when you saw Ghost and Jonny sitting back on the curb happily munching away. You sat Gaz in the back of the car, deciding to lock the back door this time. You then filed in Jonny than Ghost. Closing the door behind them, you made your way back to Price.

“Come on sir,” you called softly. He looked up to you and with the biggest beaming brightest smile, and he giggled. God you had never seen anything more pure.

“Your sweet Doc,” he said. 

“Thank You sir. Now can you get in the car please,” you begged. 

“Yes Ma’am,” he nodded, suddenly shooting to his feet. And with that, he toppled back like a domino landing in the bush.

“Christ,” You scrambled to get him out, practically carrying him to the car. Putting him in the driver's seat you buckled him in. When your head rose to make sure the boys were all in you were met by empty back seats. 

“Doc, we can't leave the boys,” Price stated pointing out the window. Where the three men were gathered around a tree relieving themselves. Only Gaz seemed to just be standing there and Jonny appeared to be pissing on Ghost's boot.

“Get in the car!” You called out the window. Begrudgingly, they all piled back in. 

“Hang on, I need a piss,” Price spoke up just as they all buckled in. With a tired sigh you patiently waited. Then when he returned you drove off. 

“Wait, a minute, this ain't the way home,” Gaz suddenly pointed out.

“Yes I know. I think I know the bar you're talking about. We're going to go back there and pay your tab and get your shoes back. The higher ups would have a field day if you guys got in trouble,” you explained. Pulling up to the bar, you parked the car.

“Wait this is a police station,” Jonny pointed out. Yes, on the other side of the street, there was a police station. 

“We should go fight that police officer,” Ghost suggested.

“What? What police officer?” you asked.

“The one we stole this from,” Gaz said, pulling a taser gun that had been tucked in the back of his pants.

“You stole from a police officer!” you exclaimed.

“First of all he was an absolute piss head. A real fucker,” Price spoke up in a logical tone.

“Yeah, he tried to arrest Gaz,” Ghost added.

“Prick,” Gaz grumbled.

“Let's do this Lads,” Price grinned at the rest of them. Like a toddler hyped up on sugar.

“Actually, I think that might be a bad idea,” Gaz spoke up.

“Gaz,” Price called and Gaz hummed in response.

“I got two of these and you got two of those. And we got whatever da fuck Ghost is, lets go,” he held up two fists before stepping out of the car.

“No NO nonononono,” you reached over trying to grab at Price, but he was already gone.

“I swear to god if any of you move I'll give you tetanus shots in the morning,” you threw the threat back at the remaining men in the car. The tetanus shot was one of the worst shots you could get, and they all had bad memories of it. So at the threat, they quickly did their seat belts back up. 

“Christ,” you hissed, quickly hopping out of the car when you saw Price walk up to an officer hanging around outside.

While you were trying to deescalate the situation and explain to the cop why there was a drunk man trying to pick a fight, the boys were watching from the car. 

“She's scary,” Gaz whispered.

“What a fucking woman,” Ghost grumbled.

“I think I'm gonna ask her out,” Jonny declared. Ghost head snapped around faster than light.

“Fuck off,” he grumbled.

“Don't tell me what to do,” Jonny rumbled back.

“I bagsed her. You can't do shit,” Ghost said.

“Fucking when?” Jonny asked.

“Just then,” Ghost stated in a matter-of-fact tone.

“You can't bags a woman,” Gaz interjected.

“I know, women are strong beautiful beings to be respected and we are to respect their choices,” Ghost said, all the boys agreeing.

“But I still bags her,” he added at the end. 

“Fuck you Brit. If you like her, do something bout it!” Jonny snapped his blink slightly delayed. 

“Suck a cock scotsman,” Ghost snapped back.

“Do-Do you think you can beat me in a physical altercation of feisty cuffs?” Jonny fumbled with his words, raising his fists slightly. His aim was to star threateningly at his face but he missed the mark slightly staring at his knee. “I will beat you in a way you have NEver Beeenn beaten before,” Ghost stared at Jonny’s unfocused gaze. Before casually reaching over and giving him a gentle backhanded tap on his face. 

“OHHHHHH,” Gaz called from his middle seat.

“DAMMIT!” Jonny explained as if he had just received a full on punch but didn't move in the slightest.

“You just got hit in the face lad,” Gaz giggle.

“Hit me again!” Jonny dared. So Ghost did, repeating the same action. Only it didn't seem to compute in Jonny mind the second time. “I dare you, you put your hands on me one more time, Cause I swear, it will be an, I will-” Ghost reached over his wrist wrapping around the back of Jonny neck.

“Come closer so I can put you in a choke hold,” Ghost asked politely.

“No!” Jonny declared going to hit back only for his hand to completely miss and fall to the side harmlessly. The two fumbled in the back of the car not really accomplishing anything.

“Guys, look he's gettin the cop!” Gaz announced. They all looked out the car window to see the cop walk off.

You had tried and failed to calm them down. Price had demanded to see the cop that tried to arrest Gaz. The boys all piled out of the car, some more graceful than others, before rushing up to you.

“Oh god no, get back in the car please!” you begged.

“Gotta get loose,” Jonny stated, starting to do jumping jacks.

“Guys Doc is right. We should go,” Gaz stated.

“Pussy,” that one word from Ghost was all it took for Gaz to shrug his jacket off and start stretching.

“You guys are really gonna fight a cop!?” you asked, bewildered by it all. 

“Yes we are!” Jonny yelled confidently.

“No you're not!” You yelled. You couldn't believe it. It was like all common sense had been turned off in their heads.

“Ohhh Jonny’s in trouble,” Gaz grinned.

��Fuck you,” Jonny called reaching out to try and give Gaz a slight tap on the nuts.

“Dont touch my balls!” Gaz cried. 

“Yeah Jonny,” Ghost chuckled, amused by it all only for Jonny to try and hit his. Bewildered, you were utterly bewildered as you saw the group of highly trained soldiers all become involved in what you assumed was a game of hit the dick. They were all relatively bent over trying to protect their jewels while simultaneously trying to hit each other. Even price had been pulled into it.

“Guys come on,” you begged. 

“He touched my penis!” Jonny cried in a high-pitched voice.

“Don't touch my penis!” Gaz screamed right back. 

“Can I help you boys?” A cop walked out of the station.

“Officer. Hi. I am so sorry about them there just a little drunk, I'll get them home safely,” you quickly interjected yourself between them.

“It's the cop!” Jonny declared pointing at him. The cop was beyond confused. Because for one, he had never seen the boys before in his life. 

The truth of the story was that it was a comply different cop that had tried to arrest Gaz. They looked similar, and that was about it. And the only reason why he was trying to arrest Gaz was because he had stolen his taser gun.

But the boys could hardly see straight, so when they heard the cop was there, they trusted his words comply. 

“Come on, let's go!” Jonny declared as they all crowded around the poor man. Well, you tried to keep them back trying to speak over their taunts for a fight. The cop spoke into his radio, requesting backup.

“Please, this is all a big misunderstanding. They're actually really nice blokes,” your words fell on deaf ears.

“Pig!” Ghost said.

“Oh look, the little boy needs back up. We can take em,” Gaz said.

“If Laswell finds out about this, she’ll have your heads!” Your yell instantly had the boys silent.

“FUCKEN RUN!” Price ordered the fear filling them. Instantly they took off down the street.

“Serpentine!” Gaz yelled had them all running in a squiggly line. Which had Jonny and Gaz running into each other. Ghost even knocked his head on a low post not even flinching as he kept on running. That left you standing there out the front of the police station with a group of police officers. And you all watched as the boys disappeared down the street. 

“So um that,” you trailed off, pointing to them. “I uh,”

“I have no explanation for that,” you whispered in defeat. 

When you found Gaz he was still running down the street.

“GAZ GET IN THE CAR!” you yelled out the window.

“FUCK THE POLICE! FUCK POLICE WOMEN!” he yelled.

“WHAT!?” you yelled. He instantly stopped running up to the car window.

“I have nothing against women, officers. I understand how my words were terrible. I just heard you were a woman and everyone calls you all policemen so I wanted to be inclusive but I realize I was just singling you out,” he explained drunkenly.

“Gaz I'm not a police woman. Get in the fucken car,” you ordered.

“You can't fool me. FUCK POLICE WOMEN!” he yelled, taking off sprinting again. 

“Fuck this,” you grunted slamming on the breaks and jumping out he car. Gaz wasn't really sure what happened but one moment he was running down the street and the next he was in the back of the car the seat belt cut and tied around his hands and feet.

The others were a bit harder to find. Price was up a fucking willow tree. Getting him out of the tree was a fucking mission. You ended up just throwing random stuff at him until he eventually fell out. You used branches to tie him up and put him in the car as well. Finding Soap was a lucky find. You saw him stumbling down the street and when you called out to him he rushed into a club. As you walked in you realized quickly that you wouldn't have much luck finding him. It was packed to the brim and you couldn't see over anyone's heads. So you make your way up to the DJ booth.

“Hi, I'm trying to find a drunk scotsman. He's a vet. Do you mind?” you asked, gesturing to the microphone.

“Anything for our boys,” he said, handing it over.

“If you're a Scot and wearing a kilt, come up on stage for your prize!” Everyone cheered as you tucked yourself behind the DJ stand. Jonny walked up on stage basking in the cheers, raising his hands high in the air. 

And then you crash tackled him to the floor, tying him up with some power cords.

“Fucks sake Jonny,” you grunted after you had lugged his body out of the club and into the car. 

“Wow, they caught you before me, Captain. I'm surprised,” Jonny grinned smugly. You spent the next hour searching for Simon. You were about to give up when you decided to ring his phone. If Gaz’s still worked there was a chance his did too. Hearing the ringing you frowned. It wasn't just coming from your phone. Looking back to the boys, you could hear the muffled sound.

“Hello?” Ghost asked through the phone. His actual voice sounded once again from the back. Getting out of the car, you rounded it before pulling the boot open. There Ghost lay, his large body comedically tucked into the back, the Traffic cone still in his arms.

“How long have you been in there?” you asked.

“Since you caught Gaz,” he stated simply. With a deep sigh you gestured him out of the back. You knew you didn't need to tie him up and helped him to the front seat. Locking the doors, you started to drive everyone back to base.

“Boys, we've been kidnapped,” Price stated slowly. 

“Like hell we have,” Jonny whispered back.

“What are you boys whispering about back there?” You asked. With your eyes on the busy road, you failed to see them untie themselves and jimmy the lock.

“RONDEVU AT THE PUB BOYS!” Price ordered. Instantly, they all threw themselves out of the car and legged it in opposite directions. You had slammed on the brakes once they had done it. You watched them run, letting your tired head fall to the steering wheel.

“Give me strength,” you pleaded. This time you weren't so lucky in finding them. 

What happened was your phone rang again. From a new number.

“Hello?” you already knew who it was.

“Hey doc. Can you come pick us up? We lost the car,” Gaz's voice wafted through.

“Sure where are you? You asked.

“The police station,” he whispered bashfully.

So there you were back at the police station. You smiled bashfully at the officers the boys had tried to fight. Luckily for them you were a sweet talker. And the fact that they were military helped as well. They would have been charged with theft of a police officer and walking out on a tab. But you returned the taser gun, which hadn't been discharged. And you paid the tab with a generous tip getting their boots back in the process. The boys embarrassingly walked out of the station looking like puppies that had just been kicked. 

“Are you mad at us?” Jonny asked.

“Not mad, Just disappointed,” you shook your head. For the four drunk men the sentence was devastating, making them drop their head in guilt. A tiny smile pulled at your lips.

“Come on, let's get you home,” you ruffled Jonny's hair gently pulling them all out of the police station.

“Can we get McDonalds on the way home?” Gaz asked.

“I want an ice cream,” Price spoke up.

“Sure, why not?”

This time, the drive was much more peaceful. When you got back, you made sure they were all changed, well hydrated and tucked into bed. Which was incredibly hard because they had hit the pass out drunk stage. Ghost was the hardest. You managed to get him on the bed and his shirt and jacket off relatively easily. You paused momentarily as you saw his bare upper body. God damn the greek sculptures could take pointers from him. Your gaze softened as you saw all the scars and bullet holes that lined the ripples of his muscle. He's been through a lot. You felt slightly perverted as you undid his pants. Only they were wet and long, so you stood there yanking at them pulling them off inch by inch. Now you were using your whole body to get those bad boys off, so it didn't surprise you when you flew halfway across the room when you finally got them off. Breathing heavily, you gently lifted his legs back onto the bed. Grabbing the blanket, you tucked it up to his chin, your hand brushing against the wet mask. While the room was heated, it was still cold. Plus, you couldn't tell if it was water or blood from the hit that was on the top. 

“Alright Simon, I'm gonna take off your mask. But I'm gonna close my eyes so don't worry. I just don't want you waterboarding yourself in your sleep,” you whispered. He gave no response. With a deep breath, you reached up and closed your eyes. Your hands gathered the material at the bottom of the fabric and started rolling it up. In your focus you hadn't noticed Simon's eyes snap open at the movement. His hand had almost snapped around your wrist, only stopping when he saw your eyes closed. Slowly, he let his hand fall as you pulled the mask fully off. 

“Alright, now let's see if you did any damage to that head of yours?” you asked. Your hands brushed away his hair from his face, humming at the loose curls. His heart stirred as he stared at you, loving the blissful feeling your hands gave him as they moved across his face. When you were happy that it was only a lump he had sustained a small giggle left on your lips.

“That's gonna be a shiner mate,” you whispered.

He watched as your smile dropped slightly when her thumb brushed over a scar. You got a weird sense of DeJa'Vu as you thumb gently traced the scar. So many scars. Life certainly hadn't been kind to him.

"What am I gonna do with you huh?" you asked softly. Brushing his hair back once again, you stood.

“Night Simon,” you whispered before blindly making your way out the room. Simon watched the door close before looking up at the ceiling. His hand clasped over his rapidly beating heart as he came to the sudden realization. 

He was absolutely smitten for the Doc.

“Fuck,” he grunted.

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=COD Master List Here=

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[lookingbackatfashionhistory]

• Hard tartan kilt decorated with silk rosettes and matching pink silk ribbon ties, part of a man's kilt suit.

Place of origin: Great Britain, United Kingdom, Northern Europe

Date: ca. 1820

Medium: Tartan, silk, cotton

[homeofthelonelywriter]

Of Cupcakes and Skulls | Part 5

(A/N) Getting this ready one minutes before it's going up. xD Hope you enjoy a little bit of domestic downtime between the trio. Don't know for how long it will last. ;)

Pairing: single dad! Mafia! Simon x baker! Reader

Warning: kissies, fluff, angst, comfort, Simon is fucking smitten

Synopsis: Based on this post by @lunamoonbby

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9

Finding Millie’s room was easier than you anticipated, the penthouse was ginormous after all, but once you saw a door, covered in soft pinks, blues, yellows, and oranges, creating a beautiful sunset, you knew you had reached your destination. You softly knocked and waited for a response from inside, before entering and smiling at the little girl. Once Millie saw you in the reflection of the mirror she sat in front of, a big, toothy grin took over her face. You approached, taking in the room. It looked like something straight out of childhood dreams.

The walls were painted in a beautiful shade of pink, one was even painted to depict a field of gorgeous wildflowers. Her bed was in one of the corners, surrounded by thick, heavy curtains, creating a cozy nook that offered privacy. One wall was covered in bookshelves, offering every children’s book you could think of, and was completed with a small, comfortable reading chair. The rest of the room was covered in soft rugs and a multitude of toys. And then there was the little vanity Millie was sitting at. The table was covered in hair ties and bows as if she was trying to decide which one to wear. You joined her there, smiling at her through the mirror.

“Want some help getting ready?”

Millie nodded vigorously, and after she explained what kind of hairstyle she wanted, you got started, brushing her soft hair, before splitting it off into two sections, carefully creating space buns, which you decorated with small, light blue bows. Once you carefully arranged a few strands to frame her face, and she confirmed that she was happy, you noticed that you couldn’t see a wardrobe anywhere in the room.

“Where are your clothes?”

Millie, who was still inspecting her reflection with a gleeful smile, glanced up and pointed to a set of double doors, on the far side of the room. You immediately got a hunch of what was awaiting you, but were still surprised when you pulled the doors open. The best way you could describe the room you just walked into, was the walk-in closet from ‘Princess Diaries 2’. For a few moments, you just stood in the doorway and gawked at the massive collection of clothes, shoes, and accessories.

“Are you okay?”

You turned to look at Millie, who had walked up to stand beside you, quickly closing your mouth, though your eyes stayed wide.

“Uh…yeah. That’s a lot of clothes. How do you decide on what to wear?”

Millie shrugged and walked in, gently grasping your hand on the way and pulling you along with her.

“Sometimes I know. Sometimes I close my eyes and…and point.”

As if to demonstrate, she slapped her tiny hand over her eyes and spun a few times before stopping and pointing at a random dress. You chuckled as you watched her, your head cocked to the side as you watched her, lowering her hand and giggling as she walked and grabbed the dress. It was made of a heavy and thick material, the pattern reminding you of a kilt.

“I like this one. J-Johnny gave it to me.”

You wanted to ask who Johnny was, but before you could, you heard a soft knock on the door to Millie’s room.

“Are you almost done? Breakfast will be ready in a few minutes.”

Simon peeked inside, smiling when he saw you and his daughter.

“Almost, we’ll be down in a second, okay?”

His eyes flickered from you to his little girl, who by then was head first in a drawer full of tights before they returned to you. They were filled with adoration, and you couldn’t help but smile, as he nodded, glancing once more at his daughter before he left the room and walked back to the kitchen.

As soon as he was gone, you turned back to Millie, who was by then holding a pair of thick, grey tights.

“That what you want to wear?”

She nodded with a smile, so you quickly helped her get changed, before you switched the light blue bows, to red ones, that fitted the dress better. Once both you and her were satisfied, you took her hand and together you walked to the kitchen and through to the dining room, where a buffet of breakfast awaited you. Simon was already sitting at the table, a cup of tea and a glass of orange juice in front of him, with that day’s newspaper open, on his lap. But as soon as you entered, he glanced up and closed it with a grin, putting it away for the time being. He patted the seat next to him, and you watched as Millie bounced up to him, before he got to his feet and picked her up, whirling her around once, before carefully setting her down on her high chair.

He then glanced at you, beckoning you to the other side of him, with a smile. You followed and sat down next to him, not protesting when his hand found your thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze.

Breakfast was chaos. Millie insisted on playing multiple different games while she ate her pancakes. Additionally, she had been given free rein with the syrup, you were just glad that you had put a napkin over her dress at some point, so you didn’t have to change her clothes. Once everyone was done, you helped Millie put on her shoes and coat, before Simon sent you back to his bedroom.

“There should be some clothes on the bed, we’ll wait here.”

You looked at him surprised but did as you were told and walked to the room, where you did find a pair of really expensive-looking jeans and a T-shirt in your size, as well as a well-worn and oversized sweater. And once you pulled that sweater on, you immediately knew that it belonged to Simon. A smile spread on your lips as you wrapped your arms around yourself and enjoyed the feeling for a second, before making your way downstairs. By then Simon had also gotten dressed, wearing the same coat he was wearing when he came to visit you the day after you met him and Millie, but instead of the black suit, he was wearing a pair of black dress pants and an expensive-looking, dark grey sweater. He grinned when you came into view, pulling you in by your waist once you were close enough, leaning down to whisper in your ear.

“Looks good on you. Even better than I thought it would.”

You smiled and rose onto the tip of your toes to press a quick kiss to his lips, before lowering back down.

“Do I want to know how you got clothes in my size that quickly?”

He smirked, moving closer again until his lips ghosted over yours.

“I work in mysterious ways.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle as he pressed his lips to yours in a quick peck. Both of you were so lost in the moment that you didn’t even notice Millie tugging on your sweater until she spoke up.

“Can we leave? We’re late.”

Simon and you, both glanced down at Millie, who while still looking at the pair of you with happiness in her eyes, now also showed signs of nervousness. Simon quickly nodded.

“Of course, munchkin.”

While Millie waited, Simon quickly helped you into your coat as you simultaneously pulled on your boots. Within a minute, you were done and Simon opened the door for the two of you. Once outside the penthouse, you used the elevator to get to the garage, where a black limousine was already waiting for you, a man dressed in a black suit in front of it.

“Johnny!”

Millie let go of her father’s hand and bounced to the man, who quickly kneeled down and enveloped her in a hug, chuckling as her tiny arms wrapped around his neck.

“Millie!”

You glanced up at Simon, but he just shook his head, glancing at you in a way that simply said ‘later’. You nodded, turning back to watch as the man, Johnny, carefully strapped Millie into her car seat, before he turned to Simon.

“Boss?”

“Ride in the back with Mills. We’ll take the front.”

Johnny nodded, winking at you before he rounded the car and got into the back seat. You could hear Simon mumble something under his breath, as he watched the other man win at you, making you giggle. You grab his arm, smiling up at him.

“Don’t worry, I’m only interested in you.”

He smirked before pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

“Good.”

Still smirking, he led you to the passenger door and opened it for you, waiting until you were all buckled in before he closed it and rounded the car to get to the driver’s side. Once inside and buckled in, he turned the key, and the car purred to life, much smoother than you were used to with your old and mostly broken car. And then you were off.

Simon easily pulled out of the garage and onto the street, moving through the city traffic without issue, his hand on your thigh. After a few minutes, he glanced into the rearview mirror, nodding. You quickly turned and watched, as Johnny pulled out a pair of headphones and placed it over Millie’s ears. She glanced up for a second, before turning and looking out the window.

“You’ll stay with her today. I want eyes on her at all times. Kyle will be on the perimeter. If anything happens, get her out of there and contact me, okay?”

Johnny nodded.

“Yes, boss.”

Your eyes returned to Simon and watched as he swallowed thickly, obviously nervous. Frowning, you covered his hand on your thigh with your own, giving it a gentle squeeze. He glanced at you, a soft smile on his lips, as he let out a nervous sigh.

After a few more minutes, you pulled up in front of a daycare center and watched as Johnny got out of the car, before getting Millie out as well and setting her down on the ground.

“Have a great, munchkin. Johnny will stay with you today, but we’ll pick you up later. I love you.”

Millie waved through the open door, a wide smile on her face.

“Love you too, Daddy!”

You waved at the little girl through the window and watched as she waved back, continuing to do so until you rounded a corner and disappeared from sight. A smile stayed on your lips as Simon continued to drive through the streets. You didn’t pay any attention as your mind instead went through the events of the last few days and weeks, the smile getting replaced by a frown whenever König entered your thoughts.

“A penny for your thoughts?”

You glanced at Simon, who was already glancing at you from time to time, while still keeping his attention on the road. When you didn’t respond, he spoke up again.

“You look worried.”

You shook your head, before glancing at your intertwined hands, still resting on your thigh.

“Just…just worried about König. I know you won’t let anything happen to me, but…I can’t shake the fear.”

A frown settled on Simon’s face before he squeezed your hand and quickly pulled into a parking spot. Once he killed off the engine and unbuckled himself, he turned to you and gently grabbed your face, turning it so that you were looking at him.

“I know you are scared, and you have every right to be, but I swear, on my life, that I will do whatever I have to, to keep you safe. If anyone harms as much as a hair on your head, I will rain down hell on them, I will drag them before Hades myself and make sure they receive a punishment fit for their crimes.”

You didn’t even notice the tears slowly drifting down your face as his words registered. His thumbs carefully wiped away the tears, pulling you closer until he could press a kiss to your forehead, before undoing your seatbelt and pulling you over and into his lap, holding you close against himself.

“I won’t let him get to you. I promise.”

You nodded against his chest, cuddling into his embrace and letting the feeling of safety wash over you. After a few moments of staying in his embrace, you slowly pull back, careful not to press on the horn, and look around. Familiarity washed over you as you took in your surroundings and your head quickly swiveled to the left, where you saw the front of your bakery. But…it didn’t look like your bakery. At least not like how you imagined it after what happened the day before.

“What…what happened?”

Please consider reblogging and following me! It helps a lot!

Call of Duty - Masterlist

Master-Masterlist

Tags: @lunamoonbby @distinguishedprincesstrash @xanvasy

Like what you're reading? Buy me a coffee!

[kiltedcubfll]

[bebemoon]

look for the name SHRUTI (requested by @ikhaberry) | jean paul gaultier maille mesh frill camisole top in black, vivienne westwood grey and white striped kilt-style skirt w/ overlay of brown lace and three leather kilt buckles, casa shop vintage gold moonstone ring, régime des fleurs "fauna" eau de parfum (bergamot petitgrain, castoreum, coffee blossom, grain, indian oud, night-blooming flowers, nuts, saffron, sumach, tonkin musk), miu miu pink satin jewel-encrusted cork platforms w/ removable lace-up gingham ribbons

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Look, This is gonna be one of those things that sounds bad until you read the whole story. Please don't read the title and go to 'yta' without reading.

AITA for yelling at our friend that my brother isn't trans?

Look, My brother ISNT trans. He likes to wear kilts and sew, Which is what kind of started all of this. My brother is NOT trans, He loves being a boy (trust me, I can hear him enjoying being a boy in his room all the time. Theres no way he'd wanna chop it off(I mean this as a joke I don't actually know how the surgery works), He's told me multiple times that being told by others what he likes is 'feminine' and 'girly' upsets him because he's proud of being a boy and doesn't like being called a girl. Its not because he hates girls or thinks less of them, He just does not like being called the wrong gender which I'm sure you want to be called the correct gender too.)

Anyways lets begin. I (16F) am my little brothers (15M) best friend, Basically. We grew up together and do everything together, Including sewing. I liked it when I was younger, And eventually convinced him to try it as well. He loved it, And we love just sitting together and making random crap we usually end up selling at our yearly garage sale. (Our mom makes us sell all our unneeded crap every year, But we aren't complaining when we make like $100 for it, Mom and dad even help us figure out what we actually wanna keep (we sometimes see old things and go 'Oh I could never get rid of this' and then throw it away))

Sorry for the rambling, But you'll see why some of this is important to know.

Basically, We were getting our shit together for the garage sale, And invited over a mutual friend of ours, Who I'll call uhhh Ley (16F). Shes kind of obsessed with the LGBTQ and loves to help people 'realize' they're gay or trans or non-binary. By this I mean she'll literally bully people she 'knows' is gay or trans by always telling them they are and spreading rumors about them saying they are. The way she 'knows' these things are from gut feelings. I thought maybe she needed friends who would be honest with her and tell her gently that it needed to stop. She stopped being so bad with it and we even convinced her to admit to the rumors she started being fake. We've known her for around 3 years now, And she's stopped doing it as aggressively for 2 of those years. She still makes jabs and 'jokes' saying things like "Oh thats so girly, Are you sure you're not trans?" and "Oh thats such a boy thing to do, Are you a lesbian?", Both quotes she's said to me and my brother less than a week ago. I am straight and cis, So is my brother. We have nothing against the lgbt, We just aren't apart of it. We support the lgbtq as much as possible (with my part time job I like to donate some of my paycheck towards point of pride so people who need the surgeries or binders can get them), And are very open about supporting them.

While we were cleaning out my brothers room and finding stuff to throw into the 'sell' box (we like to do precleaning before our parents help us, It makes everything faster and less work on the people trying to help), And Ley found my brothers kilt. She did a long exaggerated gasp, Looking at my brother.

"So, How long have you been trans? Why didn't you tell me?? I knew it the whole time!"

My brother tried to explain that it was a kilt for men, And he wasn't trans, But she kept interrupting him saying crap like 'you don't have to lie I know now' and 'Its nothing to be embarrassed about, I knew ever since you started to sew'. The last straw for me was when she continued not listening to him and started to ask about how he was gonna come out as school. I yelled at her to get out, That neither of us were gay, Neither of us are trans, And neither of us are apart of any of the lgbtq. We are allies and nothing more. She tried to argue that he had a 'skirt' which OBVIOUSLY meant he was trans, I basically screamed at her that she was a stupid know it all who made everyone who wasn't apart of the lgbtq's life hell because she made sure everyone knew them as someone they arent (I know, I shouldn't of brought up 2 years in the past) and that I was tired of her trying to force everyone to be in the LGBTQ when its just not realistic. Not everyone is gay or trans, Some people are cis and straight. She started crying and left, We haven't spoken in a few days but I think I'm justified. I'm tired of living my life being told I'm something I'm not, I'm tired of seeing it happen to my brother too.

My brother later thanked me for standing up for him, Telling me it made him really upset when she said those things. To cheer him up we watched his favorite movies and I made him his favorite dinner (mom and dad both work day jobs so we both make lunch and dinner)

And for those who are gonna say that allies are apart of the LGBTQ I strongly believe the A is for aro/ace. Being an ally isn't a gender or sexuality

(unless people identify using ally/allyself of course or whatever it is, I'm not quite sure how neos work or whatever but I love to see how creative people get with it and am happy it gives people who don't identify with any of the normalized(? Idk the correct term but yknow the man woman and nb) genders a chance to be who they actually are)

Extra info on why I think I could be the asshole: I feel like we might've been able to explain it if we got her to shut up for a minute, But she kept talking over us. I feel like I went too far by insulting her, And I feel like I might be TA because she's also autistic (so is my brother though, And I have ADHD).

Why I think I'm NTA: My brother is really quiet and doesn't really defend himself often. He doesn't really know how to stand up for himself and is 'easy' to talk over (soft spoken, Quiet talking voice and nonconfrontational) which is why I believe I had to step in in his place, And I don't believe I did anything wrong defending my brother and making her stop calling him what hes not.

Anyways. AITA for yelling at our friend that my brother isn't trans?

To see later: PINK PANTHER

What are these acronyms?

[intergalacticfop]

Minoan Heanos

The distinctive open-front dresses worn by Minoan women are probably even more iconic than the multi-layered kilts. Over time, there's dispute whether the garment is one piece or a separate bodice and skirt, but currently the one-piece theory is in ascendance.

The word heanos is derived from the Linear B logogram *146, wehanos. The wes- prefix, which is the squiggle in the middle, indicates a garment. Bernice Jones believes that this logogram represents the garment worn by Minoan men and women.

Marie-Louise B. Nosch, The Textile Logograms in the Linear B Tablets, pp 133-138

More research and construction below the cut:

The theory that the garment is a full-length tunic is further supported from imagery from the time, like these figures from the c. 1400 BCE Hagia Triada Sarcophagus. This detail from the sarcophagus shows three figures in some kind of procession, 2 women and 1 man. The woman at left wears a tunic with some kind of pelt as a skirt, and the other 2 figures wear tunics without anything over them, showing that they are one continuous, ankle-length garment.

Some of the most important resources for interpreting how the heanos was constructed comes from the two women depicted in the House of the Ladies in Akrotiri, wherein the side seams of the tunic are clearly visible running along the side of the body and under the arm.

details of figures from the House of the Ladies, Akrotiri, via Wikimedia Commons

advadbsvasb

Diagrams from Bernice Jones' book Ariadne's Threads, p. 82, via Gorgeous Tangents

The heanos itself is made of 3 pieces of fabric: 1 back and 2 fronts. These diagrams show a concave hem like on the labrys-shaped kilt but I went with a straight hem, which is an equally valid option. The end of the sleeves are level with the edge of the hem at the widest point. This would probably be the width selvage-to-selvage on the fabric, being narrower than fabric widths commonly are today. There are 4 seams: the shoulder seam, the two side seams, and a front seam (optional, but recommended if you would prefer not being arrested.) It may be tempting to fold the fabric across the shoulder, so the only sewing is side seams and a neck hole, but this makes a weaker garment overall. I used this as a shortcut in my fitting muslin and it caused tears and weak points at the three points of the front opening.

my fabric was a lightweight, moderately loose-woven cotton with a supplementary weave pattern in squares and diamonds. Linen or wool would have been more accurate but also? much harder to find from online quilting stores selling fabric for affordable prices. The main fabric is dark orange and the pattern is made out of pink/lilac threads. This weaving technique resulted in a LOT of long floats (unsecured expenses of thread) on the back--you can see how the wrong side of the fabric is much pinker than the right side. These floats could snag easily if I wasn't careful, so while it made a very effective visual for this tunic, I do not think that this fabric type would be viable for everyday wear. I'll leave it to people who actually know about weaving to ponder what more accurate weaving techniques would be.

Construction

The overall pattern is basically a T-shaped tunic, and the most important measurements are shoulder circumference, shoulder width, bust circumference, and the shoulder-waist length. In addition, you need measurements for the bicep, waist, shoulder-navel length, and hip circumference. After working out the fit with a muslin, I ended up with this pattern, 1 of 4 identical quarters.

Your first impulse may be to make the tunic very close-fitting, since the depictions in frescoes are skin-tight, but since the pattern has no added gusset this is a recipe for Cannot Move Arm. So I gave a very generous curve under the arm, which also made the dress look better when my arms were down, avoiding armpit wrinkles. I continued that ease into about an extra 2 inches added on to my waist measurement and plenty of extra space around my hips so that I could do exciting things like Sit Down.

I sewed the shoulder and side seams using the machine, and felled the raw edges on each side of the seam by hand with a whipstitch. I foided back the front edges of the v-neck instead of cutting them, which was a tip I got from the Gorgeous Tangents blog. This strengthens the neckline and keeps it from stretching, and also means that everything can be readjusted if you have size fluctuations or just want to modify the tunic into something more or less modest.

I whipstitched the front edges together by hand--the contrasting selvage didn't matter because it would be covered up by trim. I ended up cutting the tunic a liiiittle shorter than I wanted, so I finished it with some leftover bias binding instead of hemming it to conserve as much length as possible.

Trim

I custom-ordered the woven tape trim from Long Creek Mercantile. Both are made of wool--the "header band" and the hem trim are 1 1/4" wide and the center-front and cuff trim are 3/8" wide. I observed that most images of the Minoan heanos show trim with two colors at most, in a simple geometric or linear pattern, so I consciously restrained myself from ordering anything more elaborate. The clothing on Minoan frescoes is characterized by strongly contrasting colors, so blue trim was the most obvious, and best-looking option. Orange tunics with blue trim appear multiple time in art like the "Dancing Lady" fresco from Knossos:

Dr. Jones suggests that the band across the shoulder would historically have been a header band--a band of threads woven at the beginning of a project in order to properly space the warp bands (see her diagram at the beginning). That may be a reason why the shoulder trim often depicted under the front or sleeve trim, as shown above. Regardless, the trim almost always coordinates.

I sewed on the shoulder trim by hand, the sleeve and hem trim by machine, and the center-front trim with a combination of both.

Tassels

Many frescoes from Akrotiri and Hagia Triada show the ends of the supposed header band turned into tassels. This embellishment is not universal among heanoi, as you can see from the "Dancing Lady" above, but it does add a fun little something!

(yes, my Lounging Pants are very fashionable)

I turned the excess ends of the shoulder "header band" trim into fringes, knotting the yellow ones into a lattice and turning the blue yarns into tassels. The lattice-tassel appears on a fresco from Hagia Triada:

Reproduction of fragmentary fresco from Room 14 at Hagia Triada, Crete

The saffron gatherers from Akrotiri shown below have clearly displayed fringes at the ends of their sleeves. The one on the left has red fringes that appear knotted or ravelled/unravelled in an undulating pattern, and the one on the right has fringes that may be either beaded with papyrus-shaped leaves or cut into short tassels.

Another option is leaving the fringes loose, as seen in the Akrotiri frescoes from Xeste, room 3:

The final garment was super comfy, actually! It's much simpler to create than I thought it would be based on the frescoes, which made it all feel pretty magical when everything came together. I did think it was a little unusual how tailored this garment is, and the potential waste of fabric that comes from a shaped garment, especially compared to how later ancient greek clothing was mainly rectangles. I don't know enough about bronze-age and earlier clothing to have any idea how typical this was, since I'm extremely Not an expert on this subject, but am always open to learning more!

[owo-writing-man]

Hey I have ADHD. I have a list of task I need to do. Im gonna show the list.

5 notes- Apron

30 note- Rat bag (bag base. Interchangeable design)

28 notes- Handkerchief skirt. (Wrap skirt? Square skirt?)

70 note- Fix flowers crowns

20 notes -finish phone case painting

100 notes- Amals painting.

90 notes- Wand

3 notes- Redye brown skirt brown

3 notes- Kilt pin attachment (x2)

15 notes- Paint pink skirt.

1 note- attachment cloak thing

(So this is sorted already for my own brain so sorry for y'all. )

Why is it sorted like that? Because of how I read

I'm going to do all the things anyway, but I require dopamine, so give me notes and I'll do the thing sooner.

Red is not done

Orange is in progress.

Green is completed.

[webweirdweedsmoker]

ACCOUNT OWNER INTRO

Before you interact :

I AM a really sensitive, logical and respectful person, so I hope receive the same kind treatment♡ I'll post what I feel like posting and it'll probably be a MESS! (and worrying) I don't mind being asked, but don't be rude! And I might post things that might hurt or trigger someone, in these cases, just block my account, do not report my account, I will be very upset! ｡૮꒰◞ ˕ ◟ ꒱ა

Basic → Otherkin, therian, fictionkin, transid, pro/comshipp, loli, wild woman, radqueer, the orphan, para, plural! :3

[ LOTS OF INFO AHEAD ! ]

MY NAMES — Ash¹, Angel², Ares³, Basil⁴, Cameron⁵, Castiel⁶, Dorot/Dollete²⁶, Ena⁷, Expresso²⁷, Frank Zhang⁸, Gangle⁹, Gregory house¹⁰, Killute¹¹, Mari¹², Madoka¹³, Nana¹⁴, Natsuki¹⁵, Pavlova²⁷, Percy Jackson¹⁶, Ranpo Edogawa¹⁷, Pipsqueak ²⁶, Reimi¹⁸, Shiva²⁰, Shizuru²¹ !

HEADMATES NAMES[ excluding the host ] — Dorot/Dollet/Dor/DollノSolaris/Sol/700ノVoidノRanpo Edogawa !

MY PRONOUNS/NEOPRONOMIES — He/HimノThey/ThemノIt/itsノAngel/AngelicノArt/ArtistノBlade/BladeselfノCanni/CanibalノDoll/DolleteノGya/Gal/GyaruノKil/Kilt/Killiut/ Lov/Luv/BubノMoth/Mothself, Nebula/NovaノPaw/AwノPinke/PinkノCue/CutieノStar/StarselfノWing/Wingselfノ:3/:3s/:3zノ7/7s !

MY TRANS IDENTITYS — TransFemboy, Goodic, Transsexless, Transtimeloop, Transnonreligiousangel, Transspacegod, Transdemigod, Transcat, Transchildsexworker, Transchildsoldier, transpure, Permaguilty, Permahospital, Permaliminalspace, Transcamphalfblood, Translungcancer, TransDyscalculia, Transamnesia, TransDepressed, Transsemiblind, Emotifluxage, Message, Permafilthy, Transtopsurgeryscars, Perma:3, Lolibodic, Transcelestialvoice, Transflatfluid, TransHappyTone, Transglitchedvoice, TranSweetTone, Transunderweight, Permabrokenlegs, Transacuti, peachsentian, translightscars, Translongtongue, pastelgoric, Albinvitiligo, Transtaller, Permatears, Transcrossedeyes, Transblonde, Transwings, Iridescamian, Transpaws, Transstar, Bloodbagsplodamian, transbedrockSH, transburnSH, transcigarretburns, trishatedchild, transmissingperson, transmetamorphosis, transchildsona, transcollegedropout, transhatchling, translockdown, transnana, transhikikomori, Startearian, transhyperxual, TranSupernatatto, Transchildhood (I have too many...♡) !

MY GENDERS — TransmascfemVS, agender, rosboy, atypicaltransman, genderincident, eclipsian !

XENOGENDERS + TERMS — Astroperson, Braziliangender, Sunnymoddycatgender, Numeipsevague, ocgender, dollgender, catgender, hallowenmothgender, livingdeadgirlcorpse, trashstimmic, creaturralle, theriandocumentaryjoyic, hiddenidentiy, creepercatgender, abnormalboy, pinkselfshippgender, egirldollic, lovegorix, autistudent, angelcatgender, traitblur, aliencatgender, religeoustraumathing, jellyfishboy, nightstickergender, dollicattic, princeribbon, poemgender, conductor, puppetmasc, lullascelesic, :3thing, cosmoteillere, witchcatgender, beauboy, Fakeboy, nocstuffic, transmasc boything, cutecosplay, malewife, cutehoarder, romourina, angelicwhore, angel mascic, termcollector, videretrian, pearlroomic, stariverus, spiarcea, gachaclubgender, posthumousic, astrostarlic, elemagical, sleepinertiac, wingfrilled, faunashiftergender, gentreloveic, psychocutehorroric, hoardsoft, therigender, isolategender, musiccatgender, backroomscatoric, lacedollic, sorrowess, vampkittygender, flufstimwag, flagstimmic, wingflapstimmic, pastelector, horrorangel, magicalboything, multicatgender, sensiboy, scribblestargender, shinything, typingqu1rkflu!d, babysterric, brokengelic, curiotiltic, dreamstolievan, elegantbodiment, fictocomfic, b♡y, autisticcatgender, sollunarclipsic, elecutehorroric, magicalboigender, sotekittian, animatememenostalgic, amoncitte, keyboardsmashic, faikepic, sofeircatboy, pawthing, humanthing, strawberrycushiongender, pinkpicharic, flufcatgender, colorfulstargender, weirdkidgender !

ORIENTATION — Panromantic, lesboy, nebulasexual, bellussexual, aegosexual !

CIS ID — Canibalism addicted, autism, Native American, Highintelligian, Brazilian, Mixed, cat scratch sh, fangs, aphantasia !

KINS —Angelkin, Celestialkin, mothkin, wolfkin, foxkin, catkin [ the names mentioned in 'my names' also include the names of the hosts' fictionkin ] !

Paras — Auto-Pedo, Daisy MAP, MAP Femboy, Auto-Oulophilia, coquettemapphilia, dollsexual !

D N I :

↳ Queerphobics, Homophobics, transphobic, racists, bigots, etc.ヽ(―_― )ノ

↳Exclu;

↳”I like [thing] more then you”;

↳People who are like “Go look for it" or "I advise you to-“ instead of helping;

↳”You are so [negative thing]!!” I'm not gonna change overnight just because you told me too;

Feel free to interact: ↳plurals ↳Pro/Com/Crack/Cross/Any kind of shippers(Along you do not harass anyone); ↳Other gods(With theyr own religions or with the religions that already exist); ↳Loli/Shotas ; ↳Chronically online.

↳Special interests: Jellyfishs, MagicalGirls, moths/centipedes, gyarusubculture, astronomy, stuffed animals, mental illness/mental disorders, PJO, Supernatural, Mushroom Oasis, Madoka Magica, Tupi-Guarani culture, Yin-Yang, Cats, History of Fashion, Spiderverse, Deadpool, Wolverine, Witchcraft, backrooms, BSD, Edgar Allan Poe ♡

MY WRITINGS — TransID, charic/character ID, nullID, mutoID, alt flags, emojicombos, redesings, headcanons, oc art ! [ My writings is what you can request to me ! ]

W i l l y o u w o r s h i p t h e g o d d e s s ?