#people buying abroad
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the fact that attractive people actually do constantly get free drinks, free food, free bus tickets, free entry to museums (yes this happened irl to a friend of mine), etc seriously makes me so angry. like the rest of us should get a stipend and i'm not kidding
#veesaysthings#via study abroad i recently became tangential to a friend group with a couple very conventionally attractive people and its EYE OPENING#like nobody ever buys me drinks but these girlies are getting whole PITCHERS of beer#gonna jump off a bridge fr.#and i even consider myself to be kinda cute but i'm not like heterosexual man buying me stuff cute. yknow
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btw i dont understand why becoming a citizen of another country is so hard "oh you have to have a job there bluhbluh" ok well what if i just want to live in a house that is there. and i have money saved up. why cant i do that huh
#unless you can and ive vastly misunderstood how living abroad works#but im PRETTY sure. you need a permit for that.#and the permit is only given to people working or going to school#like girl i want to go there and bring my friends but i cant if we all have to go to school and work.#what if i just magically become independently wealthy huh??? you wont just let me live there and buy your tayto chips??? disgusting
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went to milan last week and brought back some italian little guys :D
#and a little birb bc i've never seen a swan plush before so i had to take it home as well 👀#(normal things to buy when abroad hsjks)#alright but manga in italy is so RIDICULOUSLY inexpensive#i mean. yeah they're in italian and i'll have to rely on the power of the mutually understandable latin languages family#but still. wow?? great place. pretty buildings. amazing food. so many people. extreme heat. is that a bookstore? wonder where the manga is.#oh upstairs? oh there's an ENTIRE floor with endless manga?? RARE manga appears to be mainstream here???#IS THAT THE LEGENDARY NON-EXISTENT KAITO KID PHYSICAL MANGA HOLD ON#<- next thing i know i'm out of the store in a daze#checking to see how much it cost bc who on earth checks the price first when it's THE KID MANGA IN THE FLESH (paper?)#and i gasp out loud bc i got THREE volumes - that i frankly never even thought i'd ever see - at a price that here would buy 1 (one)#though interestingly enough i didn't spot a trace of bsd in any of the stores 🤔#also mystery boxes seem to be a thing? of course i had to try my luck as well - first sxf merch in the bag :D#and my melo even though i know next to nothing about the sanrio characters-#but well. in the spirit of jochum i think of them as the honorary internationally-available cousins#last but not least thank you kyotag for the travel tips and tricks! much appreciated. beautiful country. my camera roll is screaming
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very close to having a full on rant on my twt in japanese because i am SO done with the state of merch trading rn i genuinely Cannot trade for togame unless i fulfil silly little requirements that ppl have started to make for popular characters
#like No i am NOT giving up every. single. piece of merch just for one trade who do you think you are#the prices on mercari are shit too#who am i killing for a togame keyring#but i'm also simultaneously terrified to how these japanese ppl on twt will react#im not a truly native japanese person in terms of my personality since i grew up abroad so i'm still treading eggshells around jpn twt#they're so scary#like just say what you meant#you don't need to backhand me with words#or block me silently#sigh#i really don't know what i'll do for future winbre merch#im not very good at pulling togame in random merch#it's truly a curse to be a jo lover and be bad at pulling his merch#also these people are much older than me and are mostly all adults with jobs#and im just a little uni student#i can't buy entire boxes of random merch#how am i supposed to trade
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Thinking about sharing here my granny's Chiles en Nogada recipe.
Not to be mean or arrogant, but sharing would be pointless, because I'm sure you don't have or the talent or the ingredients to make them.
#for talent I mean maneuvering hot *boiling* chilis with your hands and patience at working on something that can take 3 days#for ingredients I mean fresh authentic acitrón#most people won't make them; they prefer to buy even if they are expensive#normally at restaurants *average; nothing fancy; they cost around 20-25 usd per unit *not a full meal; only the chile en nogada*#when they are well made they worh the price#also there is lore behind them#nah I will share them with you people; they are not fun to make but they are delicious#I will share cursed ingredients to use as alternative; not that I would recommend it; but you need to try these at least one time 🥺#also there are alternatives to handle the chiles but they are time consuming :(#still; it's possible to make a *poor* version of them abroad#grandmacore
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so i have arrived at - as the youth may call it - stupid asf situation. you see my printer thought they were being cool (they were <3) and sent me dupes if the small 5 x 7 graphics. which is cool except now i have nine copies of the same graphic amongst other slightly silly things, so i might run in stock leftover sales in the next month or two
#realistically i wont run any preorder things while i live abroad but i promised to penpal with my baby sister so i will be sending intl mail#anyway and i was always planning on taking some of my graphics with me for decoration purposes so might as well maybe#its just... incredibly funny how do i have nine copies of the ice does not forgive george. what will i ever do with nine copies lol#(* i dont want to open shop while i love abroad most likely cause i dont know a printer there BUT if leftovers go fine ill see lol#btw this only applies to 5x7 ones. not-a4 ones i got the amount i ordered aka the ones people wanted + personal use/archival ones#yes store was always just an excuse to buy myself more graphics. i just couldnt justify it to myself. thats why the price was so low lol#its basically production price + rounding up to account for shipping supplies lmao. and even then realistically i couldve gone lower#i just wasnt sure how many people would want any and i wanted to cover my bases haha#i do know artists who table at cons from where i will be living so mayhaps if there is interest i will hit them up to see if theyre willing#to share trade secrets. they probably will some merch manus are kept secret (enamel pins in particular) but prints are dime a dozen lol#erika.txt
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tfw ur mother calls someone you find ugly prettier than you
#'naturally' too#personal#🥴🥴🥴🥴#way to amplify the bdd babes#asked her and told her to be honest and holy shit she rly went the extra mile to tell me i dont know how to do makeup#🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴#thank god for my best friend who gave me logical reasons why she thinks im prettier lol#beauty is subjective ya but to be told somethin like that so brutally???#like girlll aren't you supposed to uplift ur own daughter?? even if she asks you such a question and to be honest?#tbh i wanna change my makeup completely and get a fuckin facial reconstruction 🥴🥴🥴🥴#we're abroad on holiday rn too and everyone is complimenting how pretty i am and she just#told me 'they dont mean it so dont be fooled - they tell everyone that to get them to like them and buy stuff'#like ok??? thank u for not thinking people actually find me pretty :)#tho ya i can see how it's a business tactic. still it's nice to be told sometimes like that.
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Also. The weird girl in school feeling of both intense jealousy and violent repulsion towards "normal" girls.
#this post brought to you by: the normaler girls i follow on insta and the stories they post#like these three girls. two of them from the same university as me. the other one also french. all in the same city as me#all exchange students at the same uni in england!#but they're going on day trips to london and living their best year abroad#and i'm - what. staying at home and making soup? sleeping and failing to buy postcards?#the warring impulses of jealousy and repulsion.#because. i want to be normal too. i want my life to be simple and nice and easy.#i want to be a pretty girl who's doing it right. i want to have my life together (somewhat) (for my age and status)#i want girlfriends in the straight way who i can have daytrips with.#i long for the simplicity of asking out cute boys and aesthetic study sessions that actually pay off#i am so blindingly jealous of them. they're so much more normal than me. they're doing Girlhood and Womanhood correctly.#but at the same time i would rather die than change so much i'd be that girl#because i am simply not that person. this is not who i am at my core#i do not want to buy startbucks. i don't want relationship drama. i don't want to put all my personal data on instagram#i do not actually want to force myself to fit into the restrictive mold of what normal and socially acceptable girlhood and womanhood are#so i feel both 1) left behind and inadequate like i'm back in middle school#2) but also at peace with the fact that you can't get along with everyone and i'm old enough to find my people now#i mean my housemates are really cool and i have other friends that are also the kind of nerdy weirdo people i hang out with#AND 3) inadequate for general 'i'm a fucking child' reasons#they're independent. they're spontaneous. they're just doing things. they're on the way to adulthood. they're in their early 20s.#what am i then but a child. i don't go out much i don't drink i have this huge aura of no romance#i need structure and plans and i have a lot of inertia#and i thought the adult thing was going well! i'm feeding myself all on my own! i'm planning my days!#i'm doing laundry and cleaning up messes! look at the adult!#she's not done baking but i was expecting much much worse honestly. i was braced for a total crumble#but no we're good. i felt proud of myself#and here i see people having the normal typical year abroad experience. and i'm not#i'm being childish and i'm wasting money doing the exact same thing i'd be doing at home but in england#anyway. 2:30. sleep time. good night#wow i have a ramble tag now
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Cool.. Our rent price got raised. :') I did not know it was even possible to get even MORE poor than me and mom already were, but here we are. Guess I'll start surviving on literal bread and water at this rate.
#/vent#personal#no but when will things stop getting worse?#in moments like this I feel especially bitter thinking about that asshole that went to me like:#'wahh wahh katy i won enough money in the court to buy everything I want but it doesn't matter because I can't buy YOU uwu'#*ten days later* 'actually I don't want a friend/sister anymore can you please stay in your bum spot and simply be my-#-online friend and listen to me ramble about my interests without any regards to yours and show off how cool my life is to you like always?#like no I am not materialistic but when people make dramatic promises of this kind they better stick to them#'nooo but you MUST get out of russia!!!' bitch how? I can hardly afford enough food let alone travelling and living abroad#anyways yeah I am done using the guy that pretended to want a better life for us both and then turned tail as a core for venting#sorry it just makes me angry#not so much living in powerty and not being able to crawl out of debt and my life state no matter what#but more about a very consistent trend of having friends that one day get RICH and dump me as 'lower class' right after that happens#he is not the only one like that in my life he is just the most recent one#really speaks about how unlikeable I am if people lose interest in me as soon as they can buy happy things instead#shows that my worth as a human being is super low and I only work as entertainment when people can't buy something to do that instead#like videogames food travels objects books etc etc...#I am just below those things and less interesting than those things and I'll die early hahaha lol#hopes are that supernatural luck power that doesn't want me to escape easily will send me something to help. because yeah my situation-#-is B A D.
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honestly the greatest epiphany i've ever had is that people are people everywhere you go. it seems really banal to say it like that, and i know many will just shrug it off as obvious, but i do think that if more held that thought in the forefront of their mind, then there would be a lot less suffering in the world. terry pratchett has a great quote about this, and it bears repeating, if ever you find yourself thinking of people as not being people like you, you are wrong. you are wrong you are wrong. people are people, no if ands or buts.
#for the longest time as a little kid i basically thought france was a fantasy land were everyone was cool and collected all of the time#and then i lived there and people were mean and they were messy but they also cared deeply about their close ones and like i had dreams#so did they#and however poorly it reflects on me#i remember being shocked that my host family could have family drama to rival my own#because i guess it just never occurred to me before that other people might be Living the same way that i was#and i'm really grateful that i had that realisation when i did i wish i had had it sooner#because now whenever i hear some blanket statement about a group of people i've not really encountered i just remember#that people are people people are the same everywhere#and that they all have their own trials and desires and people they care about#and i really can't be mad and i can't buy into blanket judgements#i don't know how to get those around me to understand this but almost no one is being a bad actor because they are evil#every one and i mean everyone is just trying to find their own peace#and just#okay idk where i'm going with this but i just wish people would stop fucking fighting all the bloody time#i had to live abroad to learn that and i really fcking shouldn't have had to#personal
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The bug man announced a tour!!!!!!!!!!! I just hyperventilated in the shower
#I’m not kidding when I’m saying I would pay any amount of money to see him#if he comes to Europe I’m buying a plane ticket to any city and front of stage tickets#I have enough money saved up for this (i wanted to use it to pay my way through a semester of uni abroad)#BUT this is much more important to me than any stupid ass uni Semester could ever be#I will not let myself believe that I’ll see him because I had tickets before and the show got cancelled and I was inconsolable for weeks#but I’m just saying#I’ve got my credit card ready paul please say you’ll come to Europe#I’ll give you my Kidney my lung my heart whatever you want boy just sing your silly songs for me PLEASE#I think this is what religious people feel like when they think they’re going to see god or whatever#the thing is this is the single most important thing to me and IF it happens it’s downhill from then on. there’s nothing more there I think#imagine seeing lady Madonna live imagine seeing him okay wings stuff imagine seeing MCCARTNEY 3 SONGS LIVE#imagine holding up a sign and he reads it and — I shan’t say#play* not okay
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this month I'm doing a challenge called 'how long can I procrastinate buying plane tickets to Germany for March before I go insane' ahahahahaha
#kinda want to go to the hamburg show as well as berlin and leipzig but i'm nervous about travelling from hamburg to berlin all alone#also i can't decide if i should fly back to finland straight from leipzig or travel back to berlin and fly from there#either way i'm stressing out so much aaaaahhhhhh#so naturally i guess i just won't buy the tickets until march and then hate myself 💅#can someone make my decisions for me lol#feeling like a total loser about stressing about something like this as well hehe#when i know people who travel abroad alone all the time with no issue whatsoever#meanwhile i'm like boohoo too scary don't wanna#ignore this lol sorry for whining on my own blog again
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being poor sucks sometimes I wanna have expendable income but rent is due.
#fugo.txt#this isnt even about some of my most unrealistic material wants either#like the one giorno figure that i cried over never being able to own#this is about not being able to buy MINECRAFT bc it's over 10k#I'm actually so upset i know its dumb but it makes so so upset to know im gonna be a slave to the machine#im gonna start working abroad online for yankis. its fucking humiliating to do it but im tired of having to choose between food or rent#and not having a single peso to spend on things i actually love doing#this is why people who cry about piracy should kts btw. aw i should buy it?? the thing worth 11.300 pesos?? bc its immoral otherwise? die
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i get on this app once a week, see swifties being out of touch and insane, i log out
#what do you mean you want to jail american swifties for buying tickets abroad#and what do you mean ur upset that ppl are going to 5+ shows#this is a concert....people are allowed to go to any shows they want#like be normal and just try other options#im not even american im just someone with common fuckin sense#direct your anger to ticketmaster u all sound like the self centered losers u claim americans to be
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i’m pretty sure studying abroad was a poor decision with regards to every single aspect of my life, but i’m saying this sick and tired and after a long day of being on a mandatory field trip i’ve been dreading all week so. grain of salt etc
#doesn’t help that i just finished listening to a self described cozy mystery audiobook set in oxford#& so now i’m nostalgic and utterly convinced i should have gone to england#but still. i am trying to be positive i am trying to keep an open mind i am Putting Myself Out There as much as i’ve been able#i’ve been talking to people i’ve been asking questions i’ve been making conversation i’ve been searching desperately for someone i like#but also like. if i could get my money back and go home right now. or go to a different program even. i would in a heartbeat#a diff program wouldn’t solve everything but it would solve the academic failure of this program#which is that i’m not interested in any of the classes i’m taking bc i’m trying desperately to take classes that fulfill major requirements#but that’s almost impossible here esp for psych which is the one i need credits for#and so on an academic level this program is a waste of my time and actually actively harming me academically and i very well might have to#take a summer class. bc i can’t meet all my requirements in time#and then on a social level. well it’s me#i don’t like anyone yet and of COURSE bc its fucking day 6 but i have talked. to so many people. and it’s so hard#AND on a culinary level i don’t like any of the food here and i have to figure out how to feed myself and i genuinely considered just buying#a pallet of meal replacement shakes and drinking those. but i don’t even know if i can buy those here#anyway it would all be fine if i was just lonely and didn’t like the food that’s to be expected im homesick#but this program is like actually literally negatively impacting my degree progress and i not only would be happier but would be on a much#more stable path to graduation if i wasn’t doing it#i wish i had picked a better program I WISH I WAS TAKING CLASSES. AT A LOCAL UNIVERSITY. IN ENGLISH. AND NOT AT A STUDY ABROAD PROGRAM#HQ WITH EXCLUSIVELY OTHER AMERICANS!!! WHAT IS THE POINT?????#personal#isa bcn
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can't tell if i'm like... starting to dislike these girls because im pmsing and that's pretty typical for me to suddenly not like certain people, or if it's genuinely because they've been giving me weird fucking vibes and did smth i think was shitty :/
#they left one dude in the club blackout drunk bc he said he didnt want to leave yet#and his phone died and he slept in the street. woke up with no memory of what happened#and a bachelorette party at the club had ripped his shirt off in shreds apparently#and its like. yeah ik those girls that left him aren't responsible for him that's not their job but like. he couldnt b responsible for hims#--himself in that state#we're in a foreign country and he was visibly fucking blackout wasted#and they left him there by himself#and then in the morning when it was like oh fuck we dont know where jake is? they were insistent that we didnt tell the profs and would#instead wait FOUR HOURS for him to contact us (WTF) before going to the spanish police Ourselves#like what the fuck do you think WE can accomplish??#whatever it turned out okay (or as ok as it could be) bc he managed to buy a charger and picked up when i tried calling again within that 1#hour that we discovered he never made it to his hotel that night#so like. it was fine we didnt need to get the professors or cops involved and nobody had to get sent back home to the US#but like. the fact that they STILL are treating it like no big deal is really giving me rancid vibes#he could have been robbed or assaulted or kidnapped or killed. and what would we have done#like. idk. it seems like theyre just trying to sweep it under the rug bc it was THEM who saw him last#it was THEM who abandoned him while he was in no state to be on his own#and it's especially jarring bc some of those girls i'd considered to be really great people that i really liked!!#and then for one of them especially to be LAUGHING when jake was telling her in person what had happened#like zero concern whatsoever#and its so offputting like... genuinely was this no issue in your eyes.#and it's scary bc it really is a double standard bc if this was a girl then everyone would have been flipping the fuck out#the profs and cops would be called ASAP even if it meant that people got sent home early from the study abroad. bc safety is more important#but bc 'hes a grown man he can handle himself' nobody was in any sort of rush to try and make sure he was okay#its just. i dont feel like i can trust half of them anymore when that was how they reacted to the situation#and when one girl today got lowkey pissed at me for being like yeah that was scary how jake was left all alone and slept in the streets#she was like 'well its not our problem. hes the one who didnt want to leave so its his own fault. he should be able to handle himself'#WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU. WHAT THE FUCK.
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