#other bad experiences ive had with dogs are as follows

[cryptideye]

why do poodle/lab mutt owners love letting their dogs loose unsupervised in their yards so they can go bite and bark at other dogs. like ajax would do this too if we let him loose which is why he is never let loose he is always supervised and we just do not put him in positions where he gets the chance to do that shit because its. irresponsible especially if you have a dog that you KNOW doesnt like other dogs. your dog does not need to run loose they do not need to be tied up in the FRONT yard to get really close to the sidewalk and all the people walking by and if youre too lazy to supervise them you can literally just keep them inside like its not hard

yes i do dislike "doodles" because i think mixing coat types is bad and i think theyre ugly AND i think their owners tend to be on the obnoxious side but im mostly using that as an excuse bc the only 2 dogs to ever bite ajax (AND our late dog argus who, unlike ajax, was entirely submissive and never so much as growled at another dog in his entire life and literally cowered on the floor if you looked at him wrong) were BOTH labradoodles and i have a vendetta now

[solradguy]

Sol Badguy’s a war criminal?

Oh god yeah. I could write an essay on all the war crimes Sol Badguy has committed but I'm just gonna list off the big ones that can be quickly cited. The information on what counts as a "war crime" comes from the United Nations' website HERE.

Rome Statute of the International Criminal Court

Article 8 War Crimes

For the purpose of this Statute, ‘war crimes’ means: A. Grave breaches of the Geneva Conventions of 12 August 1949, namely, any of the following acts against persons or property protected under the provisions of the relevant Geneva Convention: I. Wilful killing III. Wilfully causing great suffering, or serious injury to body or health; IV. Extensive destruction and appropriation of property, not justified by military necessity and carried out unlawfully and wantonly;

Most of these come from Sol's post-Begin, pre-"Sol Badguy" era where he was hunting down labs doing Gear cell research or labs that Asuka himself may have been working at, which he blew up, or during the Crusades. He almost definitely did not have time to evacuate those buildings before destroying them and we have NO idea what all he got up to during the Crusades. If Ky has guilt over having to kill humans/his own men for the benefit of humanity as a whole, then Sol probably had to do some messed up shit too. Sources: Begin epilogue, GG World/Frederick

B. Other serious violations of the laws and customs applicable in international armed conflict, within the established framework of international law, namely, any of the following acts: VI. Killing or wounding a combatant who, having laid down his arms or having no longer means of defence, has surrendered at discretion

Sol kills a bounty that was surrendering and begging for his life right before the events of Missing Link. I forget where the officially localized source for this is atm, but it's in the Japanese Missing Link manual.

XI. Killing or wounding treacherously individuals belonging to the hostile nation or army; XII. Declaring that no quarter will be given;

He kills people with fire and with a blunt sword. The United Nations' The Convention on Certain Conventional Weapons has a whole thing on why incendiary weapons are bad: PROTOCOL ON PROHIBITIONS OR RESTRICTIONS ON THE USE OF INCENDIARY WEAPONS (PROTOCOL III)

I'm not sure where under any of the Conventions his Gear cell research falls, but that's probably covered by something somewhere. It ended up being used in multiple inhumane experiments on living human beings (Testament, Aria) and animals (GGBegin: bears, dogs, owls, crocodiles), and was the catalyst for a war that almost wiped out the entire human race. He wasn't directly responsible for that, but he certainly contributed to it.

One could probably argue in the case of the Gears he mercilessly slaughters too. They're shown to be fully sapient (or at least highly intelligent), and to have what seems to be a budding culture of their own. They've shown Sol sparing at least a few humanoid ones (Dizzy, Solaria) but he's killed a ton of the more monstrous ones. Source: Introduction to Metaphysics (GG2Overture Material Collection), Dr. Paradigm & his units in GG2 Overture, the Ganymede Gear settlement. Solaria is from Lightning the Argent.

In short: Sol Badguy is a war criminal.

This isn't a series called Innocent Gear though. Pretty much the entire cast has done one fucked up thing that would get them on trial at the United Nations. Sol Badguy's just one of the worst and I think a lot of people forget that there's a reason why he isolates and hates himself lol

[gaybd1]

ugh yall I just had the weirdest fucking experience and I need help making sense of it

first of all two things that are true:

1. sometimes people just have Bad Days and that’s it

2. Ive been hurt by and hated on my enough people in my life to be kind of paranoid about this shit

OKAY SO long story short there’s this older guy with a dog that I see about two nights a week walking at the park the same time I take mine out. My dog doesn’t care about any dogs or trust any people except for these guys. And he’s OBSESSED with them

Usually we end up walking and talking together while to dogs follow and play. He’s kind of a weird guy but he’s nice and always really enthusiastic to talk. Like I always end up staying out longer than I plan because he’s just talking so much. Fine. Whatever.

We’ve always been real bros like he calls me sir and stuff and it’s always been two guys chilling together

Also I think he’s quite drunk most of the time we interact which might have something to do with what happened today (assuming he was sober today??)

anyway so a couple nights ago, last time I saw this guy and his dog, I also met the guy’s girlfriend who also happened to be out and about

now here’s what I think happened. because two other things are also true

1. when men meet me they usually assume I’m a man

2. when women meet me they ALWAYS assume I’m a woman

so I think this guy went home and was talking about me to his gf like “hey I’m glad you finally met my park walk bro” bc he was talking to me like he was super excited about it. and then the gf goes “what do you mean, that’s not a guy??” and now my man is super embarrassed or angry or something

I’m just saying like this exact thing has happened to me several times before

BECAUSE my dog ran up to them today and I went to walk with all of them and this guy like ignored and cold shouldered me the whole time???? BRUH

I mean he was very nice to my dog lol but still they left like super quick after we got there too

like what????? I HOPE he was in a bad mood or something but my past experience has me worried. Like is this gonna be super awkward in future? bc my dumb ass dog obviously has no idea what’s up, he just wants to see his friends

[chr0nicallycautious]

my mother

pink tote lid moment; the experience of being belittled or demeaned by one’s parents, in some cases even physically abused.

i think my whole life has been one big pink tote lid moment. from the moment i could walk, talk and follow basic instructions, i have been my mothers slave. i was always at her beck and call. whenever she needed me, i was there and always willing to do what she asked of me. i dont know why i gave up my life and devoted myself to such a women.

she always talked about how i deserved more; i deserved to be loved and treated with respect, never talked down on, cherished and cared for so deeply, which completely contradicts her behaviours towards me.

my mother is not a good person and i dont think she ever has been. she had her first child at 18/19, had her second at 24/25 and me a year later and proceeded to have two more after me. it always confuses me as to why she has so many kids when she has such little respect for them.

she was so willing to let go of my older brother when i was just a baby, leaving him with my nanny. her negligence towards him strained the relationship between me and my older brother. and then my other older sibling, gave them an ultimatum in which they could not uphold one of the options and was thrown out of the house.

i keep waiting for this moment to happen to me. for her to throw me out despite everything ive ever done to her. i cook, clean, and care for my younger siblings. i do her favours, expecting nothing in return and work tirelessly like a dog for her.

my mother is not a good person. she loses her temper and when she flies into a temper its like walking on eggshells; a bomb about to explode. you hold your breath waiting for her wrath.

my mother claims she was never physical with us and hates physically disciplining up. tell me why most of the memories i have from when i was younger are of her and my father threatening us with physical violence.

"if you dont do ____ ill rattle your backsides"

"ill smack you so hard you wont be able to sit for a week."

"if you dont stop crying ill give you something to cry about."

the threats always slipped so easily from their tongues, it makes me wonder if they actually felt bad or not. we werent bad children. we were jsut children. children refuse to tidy their rooms, the procrastinate on chores, they act out, they have bad behaviours. i know this from working with children. but at the end of the day, theyre children. they dont know right from wrong. they need to be taught to do these things and given a reason why. threatening them isnt going to do anything other than scare them and make them fear you. and this is how ive felt about my mother my whole life.

i always did things for her out of fear. always did my chores, did everything she asked. i became her best friend so she wouldnt target her anger towards me but in the end it was directed to my younger siblings for their disobedience but in the end it just made them loathe me because i was close with the person who was hurting us. i remember so vividly the fear that struck me after my older sibling was kicked out; every time my mother came up the stairs, i would believe she was coming to kill me. the impulsive thoughts got so bad that i was riddled with anxiety for months and ive never recovered and live in a permanent state of anxiousness.

my mother has been detrimental to my mental health. i cant live in this house. im suffocating. im afraid. what child should be afraid of their own mother.

my most recent pink tote moment is when i woke up to her shouting at me, saying if i didnt clean my room, take down the rubbish and dishes then she would send my best friend - who was staying for the weekend - home. but i knew that it wouldnt stop there. she'd gut the room herself and all my personal belongings would be taken to the tip. she'd make my life a living hell and for what reason?

i never felt like i had a loving mother figure in my life ever. because what mother would treat her child with such little respect.

every child deserves a mother, but not all mothers deserve children. and my mother is one of those.

[grimsagegrimmoire]

.

[actualbird]

first let it be said that i am a giant advocate for polycules. everyone in the nxx should be holding hands.

with that out of the way. HELP I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT VYN/LUKE. it is now crucial for my mental health to pick up this dynamic put it in my mouth like a dog toy and bite with the ferocity necessary to break the little noisemaker. i came for luke but vyn came for ME and now i will never be free.

i don't just need them to hold hands. i need them to play mind games with each other your honor. i need both of them to be hyperaware of what nonsense is going on, analyze it and hide it behind knowing smiles. i need them to then discuss said findings and come at it from two different angles, i need to see the battle of academics and firsthand experience firsthand. i need them to have deep academic discussions about their medical fields. i need vyn to call luke out and have luke bite back with unexpected ferocity and accuracy. i want them to get into such weird niche conversations the other members can no longer follow. i want them to try and figure out what is UP with the other parties secrecy. i want vyn to say some peak horse girl shit and have lukes only point of reference to relate to the man be a mark from 2 years ago that went south. he had to tail the farrier and he now knows way too much about horse anatomy. i need luke to drink instant coffee in front of the man who got a 20 year old pu'erh cake from yunnan for the evening who is currently looking on in barely concealed horrified fascination.

tl;dr: bark bark bark

-💚

heyyo, greenheart! and also this anon who sent this ask MONTHS AGO but finally my vibes are Aligned To Talk About Vyn/Luke

GREENHEART R U PSYCHIC? AND/OR FOLLOW ME ALSO ON MY PRIV TWT? cuz just yesterday on my priv twt i briefly went mildly insane about vyn/luke and YEAH EXACTLY THEIR DYNAMIC IS SO INTERESTING TO ME

at first glance, vyn and luke seem like characters who are LEAGUES APART. but in my prev analysis, "the nxx boys and bad things", i realized a commonality when i made the diagram in there

vyn and luke are both on the active end of the spectrum, in terms of their behavior and tendencies towards their respective "bad thing" but i wont into that again cuz i already explain what i mean in the analysis itself

what i do wanna delve into is how this active-ness makes vyn and luke's dynamic so interesting. like, vyn likes being in control and uses his expertise of it with no holds barred. luke has a very clear "i'll do it myself" mindset in so many situations. in moments that matter for one reason or another, they dont idle, they act.

it's almost as if theyre both on the "offensive", so to speak

to make this clearer, i'll bring up the only thing ive written thus far that focuses on vyn and luke's dynamic (not ship but still i feel strongly about this): chapter 5 of "filler episodes of the lost gold"

as context for u, greenheart, this fic is all little inbetween scenes of the plot heavy event Mystery Of The Lost Gold that happened back in september. i very VERYYYYY MUCH RECCOMMEND u watch recordings of this event because up to this day, it's my fave tot event of all time

but yeah, in this chapter, vyn and luke hang out and it's vyn pov and i wanted to put vyn at a disadvantage but i know hes also such a perceptive and analytical person. and ive always had this feeling that of all the boys, vyn would be most cautious about luke. afterall, luke is new on the team. vyn hasnt known him as long as marius or artem. additionally, luke comes from a background of espionage. all this makes vyn wary about luke, makes vyn want to "figure luke out"

but heres the thing about luke: very often we fixate on his tank/combat abilities that we forget hes an investigator

luke, adept at solving puzzles, can easily perceive vyn just as vyn perceives him. i would even go as far to say that luke, sometimes, has the upper hand. cuz i think vyn approaches the unknown with this mindset of "what are the weakpoints?" so that he can leverage himself to a place of control

luke does that too but also hes an engineer and inventor. hes not looking just at weakpoints. to metaphorize, he looks at things in terms of taking it apart and seeing what each piece means.

all that is why that chapter ended up like that.

and all that to say the like, vyn and luke's dynamic (be it romantic ship or platonic interactions) is so so sOOOO FASCINATING TO ME BECAUSE THEYRE BOTH ACTIVE, theyre both PERCEPTIVE, but due to personality and background, that active perception is different enough to keep the other on their toes

vyn would call luke out on all his unhealthy and over excessive self destruction. luke would call vyn out acting as if the whole world will regard him only with cruelty. vyn and luke r deffo two characters that, once they come head to head, would push each other to confront things the other probably wouldve wished to leave alone.

dumb overthinking meta aside, their vibes are just so HILARIOUSLY DIFFERENT AND IT IS DELIGHTFUL TO ME

vyn: luke, what are you drinking?

luke: oh this? homemade energy drink! i call it "Raise The Roof!" haha

vyn: and what is it made of?

luke: uh. monster energy, red bull, and kool aid?

vyn, at a loss: no

alternately

luke: aw man, i passed out on my bed a few nights ago after a mission and got bloodstains all over my sheets and they wont wash out >:/

vyn: oh?

the next day, a delivery comes to luke's doorstep and it's SINFULLY HIGH THREADCOUNT SILKY SOFT SHEETS FROM SOME EUROPEAN COUNTRY

[uzufoxy]

it makes like. some sense in some areas and like. none at all in others. but im following along enough to understand the main point which is yes kind of a shapeshifter but not at first but now you are after a bunch of stuff happened. the pointy teeth is kind a cool in my opinion plus like i hear golden retriever boyfriends are popular so may be like. the dog behaviors Are cool for a guy in his 20s??

also like woofin at a guy aint actually that bad ive had worse as an employee. mostly id just be confused i think!!

yeah like every animal.!! i think even like. extinct ones?? like dinosaurs. not fully sure. as far as how he got that i think it was like. some science experiement or something hes kinda sore about it so i try not too pry Too much yknow??

hopefully stuff like that wont happen in your world ever, or at least for like. a long long time itd be better if everybody just helped each other cuz it was the right thing to do but idk if thats realistic i like to think it is

aw thats really nice. i got adoptive parents too actually!! or like. father figures. only one of em is Actually my adoptive dad but thats not important really

Yeah somethin like that It was a curse at first but also kinda a protection?? The Twilight turned everyone else to spirits but since I had the protection of the Goddesses instead of a spirit I just got turned to a wolf till I could cleanse the Twilight

N then later I got re-cursed to be a wolf forever by the big bad ridiculous sorcerer usurper king guy of the Twili to be a wolf forever but got cleansed of that curse thanks to the power of the Master Sword

N now I can just be a wolf whenever I want so it feels less like a curse n more like just a part of me now

Though I did undergo like a permanent change even in my human form haha For example I got pretty big chompers now n I got all those funny canine mannerisms that're way less cute comin from a human dude in his mid 20s than from a pupper

Like barkin at people for example

I'm still not over accidentally barkin at that poor Malo Mart employee yesterday n I don't think I ever will be

Imagine just bein at work doin your job n then you notice someone lookin at you so you ask em if they need anythin n they they just let out a big ol WOOF at ya

I hope he never has the misfortune of seein me again but I do gotta go down there from time to time to take shipments of produce n stuff so unfortunately the poor guy will probably see my ugly mug a few more times yet

Uh sorry I hope any of that made sense at all

All animals though? Like every animal ever in the world? That's real neat how'd he come across an ability like that?

Hylia above that's horrific If that's what capitalism leads to down the road I'm tellin Malo to stop bein a capitalist before he starts chargin people for breathin the air in his stores

I mean the kid's got a good head on his shoulders for the most part but I've seen how he can get

Then looks like the pumpkin cans're the way to go for you! Even though at first I thought they were either huge cans with a whole pumpkin inside of em or just real tiny pumpkins inside the cans haha

Hey my Ma n Pa still do the same to me n I'm 25 now so I'm sure your kid'll appreciate it! I know I sure do, specially when I ain't feelin too hot

Sometimes family's all we got n I know every day I'm grateful I got such a good one that took me in like their own even if I ain't related to em by blood

The whole village really all ya gotta do is take one look at me n you know I ain't originally from here but Goddesses bless em they ain't never said a word about it

[edna-skiffens]

The Best Medicine

Summary: You are in the hospital, but you can never sleep in hospitals. Good thing you have a very attractive night shift nurse who is willing to help out.

Word Count: 4.5K

Warnings: hospitals, light med talk, bad medical writing, fluff

A/N: Please ignore the plot holes or the fact that this isn’t the most realistic and also I know this isn’t how discharge works at the hospital.. It’s called fiction for a reason, darling. Also, I left the reason the reader is in the hospital open ended bc some of us may have medical conditions/reasons that we can attach to this, but if not I tried to keep it vague enough on purpose so that you can imagine whatever. Also if you like Nurse!Tom and have requests for him lmk bc i’m happy to write for him.

Toss and turn. Toss and turn. The routine was getting old. This was your third night in the hospital and sleep just wasn’t coming to you.

Maybe it was the medicine they had you on. Maybe it was the constant symphony of sounds and people passing in the hallway. Maybe it was because you weren’t at home in your own bed.

Maybe it was just because you were in the hospital.

You couldn’t be sure. What you were sure of is that you weren’t falling asleep anytime soon.

Feeling another presence in the room, you looked from the ceiling to the doorway where you saw Tom, one of the night shift nurses, standing cautiously.

“I didn’t wake you did I?” He asked as he eased his way inside.

“Nope.”

“So no sleep again, huh?”

“Nope.”

“Sorry darling. Let’s go ahead and get these vitals over with.” He took your blood pressure, oxygen levels, temperature and wrote it down in your chart. Putting the clipboard back on its hook at the end of the bed, he looked up at your tired face. “Okay. So now about that sleep. What do you think will help?”

“Not being in the hospital.”

He chuckled lightly while walking back towards your bedside.

“I know. You hate it here. You’ve made that very clear and I try not to take too much offense to it.” You let out a slight laugh and held back the fact that he was the best part of this whole experience. He almost made it worth it. “I’m sorry we can’t give you any sleeping medication. Do you think it’ll help if I talk to you?”

“You mean tell me bedtime stories?” You couldn’t help but tease him at the adorable suggestion, though it sent a swarm of butterflies off in your stomach.

“I was thinking more like bore you ‘till you fell asleep. But whatever works.”

“You’re the nurse. If you think it’ll help.” You both sat there smirking at each other for a moment. Something unspoken floating in the air between you two.

“Well, I need to finish my round of vitals first. I’ll come check on you when I’m done and if you’re still up we’ll see about those stories.”

“I’ll be here.”

About fifteen or twenty minutes later you heard a light tap on your door followed by “Still awake?”

“Always.”

“You up for a chat?” Tom asked as he made his way to the stool then rolled slightly closer to your bed.

“Got nothing better to do.” You teased again.

“Okay. Well you should probably lay down.”

“Oh. It’s going to be that kind of story, huh?” His laugh was so beautiful and you were happy you were the cause of it.

“No.” He corrected in between laughs “The goal is to get you to sleep. So sitting up won’t help.”

“Right. Right.”

“Well.. anything in particular you’d like to talk about?”

“Why did you choose to become a nurse?”

“Ahhh. Good question. So I actually went to an art school.” You couldn’t help the brief expression of surprise that crossed your face. “I know. Shocking. I did training specifically in dance and gymnastics and I loved it.”

“Wait, so what happened?” You asked, turning on your side to face him more comfortably.

“Well one day we were rehearsing for a show and I fell. Ruined my knee. Had to do physical therapy for months. I tried to get back into it, but it just wasn’t the same. However, through that process I learned a lot about medicine and the health side of things. It really turned me on to it. And when my Plan A got a bit messed up I thought ‘hey, this could work’. So far it’s treated me pretty well.”

You smiled at Tom, admiring his passion for his career and the determination he had to keep pushing after his accident. You enjoyed hearing him talk about it too. If you didn’t know any better you would say it was helping you relax.

“My story that boring?”

“Obviously.”

“Your sarcasm has no end.”

“Oh… goodness.. you thought that was sarcasm?”

Tom only laughed and shook his head the way he often did with you.

You may just have been his patient and he may have just been your nurse, but you both bonded. He kept you company and gave you comfort. In return, you kept him entertained during the quiet night shifts.

“I’m not going to sleep. I'm just resting my eyes. But still listening.” You told him as you nestled further into the hospital bed, trying to find a position that would make it comfortable.

“Okay, darling.” He grinned at you.

“Tell me more. What kind of-” You had to stop to yawn, “What kind of art stuff did you do?”

“Oh. Well, I was in a few musicals. I really enjoyed dancing. I did ballet ever since I was young and I love the control I have over my body. The tricks I can do with gymnastics or the turns and leaps. I mean I can’t do them to that level anymore, but I try to stay active.” He glanced up and noticed you hadn’t moved, “Are you still with me?”

“Mhm.” You barely respond.

“Okay. Well it was a performing arts school so we really were trained in many areas. We had classes in acting, singing, dancing, all of it. It was a lot of fun and I met my best friends there.”

Tom began telling stories about his time at school. Before he knew it, he lost himself and track of time. He looked back at you, quiet and still.

“Y/N?” You were finally asleep. “Goodnight, darling.” He whispered as he gently made his exit.

Because Tom worked the night shift, you never saw him when you woke in the morning. Instead, Tanya, a sweet nurse that felt like a big sister, or Linda, Nurse Ratched in the flesh, came in for morning vitals and meds.

You counted down the days until your release. Life in the hospital was pretty uneventful with the limit on visitors and limited activity. There’s only so many sitcoms one can take in a given timespan. The only thing that you really looked forward to each night was when Tom clocked in.

“Hi Y/N.”

“Hi Tom.” You would smile at each other.

“How are we feeling today?”

“Better. Ready to get out of here.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear you are feeling better and still ready to jailbreak.” He smiled while writing something down on your chart. “They should be bringing up your dinner tray soon and then I’ll bring by your evening meds after that.”

“Okay.”

“If you need me you know what to do.” He called to you before walking out the door.

You were disappointed when Shelley brought your evening meds by later. She was a nice enough nurse. She just wasn’t Tom.

You’d grown accustomed to mainly having him as your nurse during the evening shift. At first you weren’t sure if it was coincidence or on purpose, but after a few nights of staying up and talking, you grew closer to him. You saw less of the other nursing staff and more of Tom.

You tried not to build anything up in your head. You were sure everything he was doing was in his job description and a part of being a good nurse.

He would sneak you extra pudding cups from the cafeteria and bring you an extra heated blanket because you could never stay warm. If you needed a new IV, he held your hand to ease the anxiety. He kept you company and made you feel less alone in such a sterile and intimidating place. And when he noticed you had trouble sleeping he chose to sit with you to help you fall asleep. You couldn’t help the butterflies that built in your stomach.

It became a sort of routine. He checked on you during evening vitals, even if someone else was doing them, and you were always still awake. He would then come and sit with you and chat for a bit, telling you different stories until you eventually fell asleep.

Some nights when you were extra restless he would help you walk the halls.

“The doctors have to see you’re stable enough before you can be discharged. Plus, maybe it’ll tire you out.” He suggested.

He would help get your IV pole ready so you could walk with it. He helped you into your slippers and eased you out of bed after passing you your robe.

Walking the hall slowly, Tom knew he had to remain professional, yet he found a few excuses to graze his hand across your back to ‘steady you’ when you turned corners or he thought you were looking tired.

“It might take me a while to get back to my usual jogs in the park, huh?” You laughed in spite of yourself.

“You’ll get there. Baby steps.” He encouraged, as you turned around the Nurse’s Station. You missed the faces the other night shift nurses were giving you both, but Tom was sure to subtly flick them off. “So, do you like running?” He asked as you headed back towards your room.

Throughout your late nights together, he told you of his three younger brothers and his dog named Tessa. You spoke about what you would do when you were out of hospital. He talked about his friends and flatmates and the adventures they had. He told you many stories, but each morning when you woke up he was clocked out and the day shift nurses were there.

Tonight was your last night. You’re set to be discharged tomorrow and while you are ecstatic to go home, you’re going to miss one thing about this place.

“I bet you’re too excited to sleep tonight. I don’t know if my stories will even help.” Tom said as he sat down next to you.

You smiled up to him sweetly.

“What are you looking forward to the most once you get out of here?”

“Sleeping in my own bed.”

“Well that’s no surprise.” Tom laughed, a contagious sound making you giggle as well. “Isn’t there anything you’ll miss about this place?”

“Yeah.” He smiled “There’s one thing.”

“What’s that?” He asks.

“The pudding cups.”

“Ahh the pudding cups of course.” You giggled while fiddling with the IV line.

“They just don’t taste the same in the outside world.”

His smile grew wider as you giggled.

“No, but really. As much as I give this place grief and say I’m ready to get out of here - which I am,” You gave him a pointed look to which he held his hands up in mock surrender, fully believing you, “it hasn’t been too terribly awful I guess.”

“Oh, well, I’m glad we could make your stay not too terribly awful.. I guess.” He teased. “Do you have anything exciting to look forward to once you’re a free woman?”

“Nothing huge planned, really. The doctors did say to take it easy.”

“That’d be wise.”

“Yeah. I’ll just lay low for a while. My sister said she may try to come visit me though so that would be nice.”

“Oh that would be nice. She’s your older sister right?”

“Right. She moved away last year to be closer to her boyfriend.”

“Ah. Do you like him?”

“Sorry?”

“This boyfriend. Do you like him?”

“He’s alright, I suppose. He makes her happy.” Tom nodded along.

“And do you have a boyfriend that makes you happy?”

“N-No. No I don’t. Not at the moment.” You began fiddling with the IV cord again.

“No boyfriend or not a boyfriend that makes you happy?” He asked.

“Neither.”

“Well that’s a shame.” If the heart monitor was connected you would’ve been screwed. “I just mean someone needs to look after you once you get home. I hope this sister comes through for a visit. You’ve got to take it easy.”

“Oh I’ll be fine.”

“I’m sure you will be.” He smiled.

“How has your shift been tonight? Busy?” You asked, fighting back a yawn.

“A bit busier than usual. There was a slight emergency earlier which is why Shelley handed out meds tonight. Sorry I didn’t come around.”

“It’s alright. I know you have other patients.”

“Yeah, but none like you.” You were sure he said that to all of his patients. After all, you’ve heard similar lines ever since you went to the pediatrician as a child. But it still gave you butterflies.

“Are you getting sleepy?”

“A little. But it’s okay.” He gave you a pointed look but continued to talk anyway. “It’s the last night. One final request for storytime. Make it a good one.”

You thought for a moment before asking your question.

“Do you ever wish that life turned out differently? That you never had your accident and you could’ve followed your dreams to be a dancer?” You asked while turning on your side and getting more comfortable.

“Sometimes. At least, I used to. But I think I’ve accepted it now. And I really can’t see myself doing anything but this.” You nodded taking in his answer “I look at it this way. If it wasn’t for my injury then I never would’ve changed my career path and found my love for medicine. I never would have made so many of the friends I’ve made or the memories I’ve made. I never would have met you.” He finishes with a sweet smile.

“That’s a very positive way of looking at it.” You told him. “Be honest, are you a therapist during the day?” He laughed out loud.

“No. I’m not. I guess I’m a big believer in ‘everything happens for a reason’.” You nodded while covering a yawn.

“So I’ve been curious to ask you,” He began, “Do you usually have this much trouble sleeping? Because you can get help for that you know?” You smiled at him.

“What? I thought a night nurse talking to you was the cure?” Tom smirked and shook his head. “I’m kidding. No, I normally don’t. It’s just the stiff sheets and hospital sounds I think.”

“Darn hospital.” He rolled his eyes and joked. “So this time tomorrow you’ll be sound asleep in your own bed then?”

You knew it was meant to be a happy statement, but you were a little sad at the thought of not having any more late night chats with Tom.

“Yes. Thank God.” You forced a smile.

You felt another yawn coming and tried to hold it back. It was already past the usual time that you fell asleep.

Tom could tell you were exhausted so he launched into a story from nursing school, hoping to lull you to sleep.

You yawned your way through listening, trying to soak up every last moment with Tom. In the morning he wouldn’t be here. You’d leave and likely never see him again.

When he finished, your eyes were half open and he wondered how you were still awake. Or maybe why.

“Why are you fighting it? The point is to sleep. Give in.” He told you gently after another yawn.

You looked up at him, half asleep and rubbing your eyes, not finding the confidence to tell him the true reason you were trying to stay awake.

“I’m happy right now.”

He smiled down at you.

“I am too. But you need your sleep, darling.” You weren’t sure what to say and you didn’t have much energy left in you anyway. “How about this. I’ve probably been in here too long as it is. Let me go check in at the Nurse’s Station and then I’ll come back and check on you soon and see if you’re still awake okay?”

The thought that he was leaving gave you a sad feeling in your stomach. You tried to remind yourself that he was just your nurse. Nothing more.

“Okay.” You smiled at him, sleepily, while settling further into the bed.

He stood up and instead of walking towards the door he walked closer to you. He grabbed the thin, white hospital blanket and pulled it closer around your shoulders.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” He whispered before he walked to the door.

“Tom?” You called out just before he opened it. He turned around with an expectant look, “Thanks for everything.”

Even though the room was dim you could see his smile.

“You’re welcome, Y/N. Get some sleep.”

You don’t remember much after that. You don’t know if Tom came back to check on you. You just remember falling asleep with a smile on your face.

When you woke up the following morning it felt like any other morning in the hospital.

The hallways were much louder. Beeps, chatter, and phones were constant. The lights were brighter.

But you were quickly reminded that it wasn’t any other morning. You were going home today.

The door creaked open and Tanya, one of your regular daytime nurses, poked her head in.

“Oh good you’re up.” She made her way inside and over to the gloves. “How’d you sleep?”

“Pretty good. Thanks.” She gave you a smile, something hidden behind it.

“I’m sure.” She said quietly to herself. You gave her a questioning look. “Oh I just mean I’m sure you’re excited to get out of here.”

You nodded as she took your vitals one last time.

“Everything looks good. What do you say about getting this IV out?”

“I say that sounds amazing.”

She took it out and bandaged up your arm while informing you of how the morning would go.

“Dr. McCoy is making rounds now then he’ll be by soon to go over your discharge. You can get dressed whenever you’re ready. If you need help, buzz me. You’ll still have a breakfast tray come, but you don’t have to eat it.” She gave you a wink while taking off her gloves.

“Thanks Tanya.”

“Of course, sweetie. And in case I don’t see you before you go, you’ve been a wonderful patient. Take care of yourself.” You smiled at her as she left you to change into some leggings and a sweatshirt.

You were packing your remaining things into your bag when your doctor walked in.

“Y/N! How are we doing today?”

“We’re doing great because we’re going home.” You smiled while taking a seat to rest for a few minutes.

“I know you’re excited.” He laughed before explaining the conditions of your discharge. You had medicines to take, a follow up appointment, and strict instructions to rest for the next few weeks. After signing some forms he left you with a stack of papers. “Is someone coming to pick you up?”

“Yeah my neighbor should be here within an hour.”

“Sounds good. Don’t hesitate to call us or come back in if you have any trouble or questions.”

“Will do. Thanks.”

A few minutes after he left a nurse brought in your breakfast tray. There wasn’t much of a point for it but since your discharge wasn’t technically until 10:30 am you were still a patient during breakfast.

You took the pudding cup that you requested with every meal off the tray before sliding it away. Smiling to yourself, you tucked it away in your bag. All you had left to do was wait for 10:30.

Tanya came in to check on you again and told you to buzz the Nurse’s Station when you knew your ride was here. At 10:27 you had a text from your neighbor that they were out front in the pickup zone. So you hit the call button.

“Yes?” Linda, the scariest dayshift nurse, answered.

“Um hi. Tanya told me to buzz in when my ride was here so I could go down.”

“Okay we’ll be right in.”

Not even a minute later you heard your door open. Expecting to see Tanya or maybe even Linda you looked up.

An audible gasp left your lips when Tom stood in your doorway with a wheelchair.

“I hear someone needs a ride?” He smiled as he made his way closer to the bed.

“Tom. What are you still doing here?”

“I pulled a double.” You wanted to ask why, but decided against it. You were still in a little bit of shock from seeing him again. “If you’d rather I can go get Linda to walk you down?” He pointed back towards your door.

“No! No.. I’m just surprised s’all.”

“Well come on. I thought you’d be running out of this place once the clock hit 10:30.” Glancing up you saw it was now 10:34. Your neighbor is probably tired of waiting already.

You grabbed your discharge papers and reached for your bag when you heard, “I got it.” Smiling at him, you sat down in the wheelchair. Tom placed the bag around his shoulder and kicked the brakes off the chair. “Ready?” You nodded up at him.

He rolled you out of the room that felt so small for a final time. You passed the Nurse’s Station and waved bye to the staff. He turned by the elevators and when you looked up at him in question, he read your mind. Looked down at you he said, “We’re taking the staff elevators.”

When you made it there he hit the button, turning you around and backing you in once the doors opened. He hit the button for the Lobby and leaned up against the wall of the elevator, briefly glancing at you, as you rode down together.

“Well you made it. You’re a free woman.” He smiled shyly.

“Yippee.” He met your eyes for a moment before looking back to the floor. The dynamics felt different. It wasn’t like your late night talks together.

“Listen, Y/N.” Tom began as he stood up from the wall and faced you. He was about to continue when the elevator ding cut him off, signaling you had reached your destination.

Maybe that was what was different. You had reached your destination.

You had a fun time talking with Tom and entertaining each other when you were both up late at night. He was fun to get to know and you enjoyed having someone care for you. He was easy to banter with and certainly easy on the eyes. But your time at the hospital was up. You knew it would be eventually. You wanted it to be.

Tom was a nurse. He was just doing his job. He was helping take care of you. He was being nice. He was trying to make your stay more comfortable. There was nothing to read into.

Your time being his patient was up and your time with him was up.

You tried to remain realistic, but the sadness still crept up as he rolled you closer to the door.

Once outside, you saw your neighbor exit the car and wave you over. Tom steered in the direction and slowed before rolling to a stop and hitting the brake locks on the wheels.

“Hi, I’m Taylor.”

“Tom.” They shook hands as Tom passed off your bag for Taylor to put in the backseat.

“I’m sorry for the circumstances, but it really has been a pleasure having you as a patient and getting to know you, Y/N.” Tom admitted as he walked around to face you. He grabbed the papers from your lap. “Take care of yourself, okay?” You had shared many smiles with Tom, but this one felt sadder.

“I will. Thank you for everything, Tom. I mean it.” You reached up and squeezed his hand. He gave you a light squeeze back while smiling down at you. Taylor returned from the backseat of the car and Tom turned to them.

“These are her important papers about follow up appointments, medications, what to do at home, all of that so please make sure she doesn’t lose any of them.” He emphasized the point.

“Got it. Thanks.” Taylor held onto the stack while Tom turned back to you.

“If I can’t handle a few papers on my own, then maybe I shouldn’t be going home yet, Tom.” You laughed.

“I know, I just wanted to make sure they made it home with you.” He walked closer. “You ready to get in?”

“Yeah.” You nodded. He helped you up, supporting you just as a precaution. Once seated, you took a moment to catch your breath as you pulled the seatbelt down. He met your hand, taking it from you to buckle you in.

“You good?”

You nodded with a smile, “Just a little tired. No biggie.”

He looked you over before returning your smile, though his didn’t quite reach his eyes, “If you need us, call us. Otherwise go home and rest.”

This was it. This was goodbye.

“Thanks, Tom.”

“Goodbye, Y/N.”

He shut the door. He walked back to the wheelchair, released the brake locks and headed inside. He looked back only when your car was driving away.

“Here’s those papers that are so important.” Taylor handed you the stack after they got in.

“Thanks.”

“So how are you feeling?”

“Better. Thanks.” You felt them looking at you as they joined traffic.

“You sure? You sound like you feel awful.”

You try to remind yourself to forget the sweet and attractive nurse and start moving forward.

“Yeah. Yeah I’m okay.” You decide to distract yourself by reading through your discharge paperwork, when something caught your eye. On top was a sticky note with the hospital’s letterhead. You were sure it wasn’t there before. Looking closer it read,

Y/N,

In case you need someone to talk to when you can’t sleep.

555-5555

P. S. I have a connection to some pretty good pudding cups too.

Tom

The smile that grew on your face was undeniable. All the feelings you suppressed came flooding in. He wasn’t just being nice. He actually liked you.

One thing you knew for sure was that even though you would be in your own bed tonight, you still would be up, talking to a very special nurse.

Lmk if you want to be on my tag list

[thefanficmonster]

The Five Scares (and one revenge)

Corpse Husband x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Swearing 

Genre: FLUFF, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Having a tendency to scare people, Corpse has gotten used to his friends being jumpy whenever he appears from the void into a Discord call with them. However, the one who has it the roughest with the spooks has to be his partner Y/N. Basically: The five times Corpse scared Y/N and the one time they scared him

Requested by Anon. Hi darling! Thank you so much for your lovely request it was a real joy to write and I had a ton of fun doing so! Hope you have equally as wonderful of a time if you happen to come across it and give it a read despite the long wait you’ve had to endure which I apologize for. Love, Vy ❤

I

Having had to go home for the night to keep an eye on their roommate’s dog, Y/N and Corpse agreed to have a video call before they fell asleep. They didn’t want to appear like that typical clingy and cheesy couple but after spending almost a whole week curled up in Corpse’s apartment, the two would feel each other’s absence to a very saddening degree to the point where they’d even forget the other isn’t around and would call out to them. 

Letting the call ring, Y/N’s hand comes up to smooth out their hair. However, the touch reveals to them that their hair needs a bit more than a simple tap or a pat to be tamed so while they wait for Corpse to answer the call, they quickly head to their bathroom. Flicking the light on, their reflection greets them with the underwhelming news of the actual state of their hair at the moment: an absolute mess. They proceed to do their best with the single hair-tie they have handy. A bobby pin or two would be neat but they have no time to go and grab one right now, seeing as how they can’t recall if they even brought them back from Corpse’s apartment. If they didn’t, they would have to search their roommate’s room for some which would take an even longer amount of time.

Eventually, they manage to tame it in something closely resembling a presentable ponytail and exit the bathroom feeling more exhausted than before. With a loud sigh, they crash onto their bed, face-first into the sea of pillows, groaning at the slight sting of their muscles relaxing at last.

“Y/N?“ The decently loud mention of their name by a deep, familiar yet sudden and unexpected voice startles them to the point of squealing and jumping an entire inch away from where they were positioned.

They look around their room in a frenzy, wondering where on Earth that voice came from and how it could be here with them right now.

“Y/N, you there?”, before they could locate it, it emerges once again, helping Y/N get an ide of where it’s coming from - somewhere in the messed up bed sheets.

“Corpse?“ They finally find their voice, “Y-yeah I’m here. Question is: how are you...“ and then it all clicks, causing them to twist their face in an expression of utter disappointment and bury it in the palms of their hands, groaning.

“You forgot about the video chat, didn’t you?“ Corpse asks, amusement not even attempted to be hidden in his voice.

“Yup.“

II

It’s been one hell of a day. Y/N’s college lectures exhausted them to a max and their six hour job following their classes did nothing to help them AT ALL. Quite the opposite actually. Makes sense why they look, move and talk the way they’re doing right now: like a ghost, zombie and an elder combined in one. To add to their misfortunes for the day, they were met with the mocking ‘OUT OF ORDER’ sign taped to the doors of the elevator, laughing in their face with the information that their hellish experience for the day is far from over.

Just the thought of having to climb to the fifth floor made their stomach turn in the most unpleasant way possible, but the though of how long that would take made matters even worse. Arriving at their designated apartment, they have every right to be pissed, cussing their heart out. 

However, then comes a new problem: the inability to pinpoint the correct key. They proceed to curse themselves, the keys, the door handle and the door itself before punching the poor wood that did no wrong and just stands here, serving its purpose of keeping unwanted people out of the apartment it’s guarding.

Following their anger outburst and front-door-abuse, they proceed to try finding the correct key once again, this time slightly more calmly as to not accidentally miss it in their frantic rifling.

Right as they’re about to try the third key, however, the door opens. Well, it’s opened by someone on the other side, that someone being none other than their boyfriend Corpse who’s currently staring at them wide-eyed, one eyebrow raised, the word ‘confused’ basically written across his face.

While he’s processing the sight in front of him, Y/N lets out a little scream, jumping back and away from the door, a hand placed over their chest as their wide eyes scan their boyfriend who now seems equally terrified as a result of their reaction.

“Corpse?!“ They manage to gasp, barely hearing their own voice over the loud thumping of their heart and the rush of blood in their ears, “What the hell are you doing here?!“

The confusion on Corpse’s face deepens, reaching whole new levels as his eyes gaze deeper into theirs, searching for the meaning behind their bizarre question. “You mean...at my own apartment? What am I doing, at home?“

For a few seconds, the two just stare blankly at one another, processing everything that’s just happened. Suddenly, it all just kinda caves for Y/N and they burst out laughing, doubling over, their arms clutching at their stomach as they do so. Their laughter is contagious, so Corpse can’t help but let out a few chuckles himself.

“Alright, you’ve been driven to insanity, I can tell.“ He mumbles at his reckless partner, coming up behind them and wraps his arms around them, lifting them up and carrying their laughing ass inside.

III

Finally deciding to sit down and get this damn project started, Y/N already feels like they’ve had enough of it, burnout already creeping in and threatening to ruin their work and trip them up every step of the way. It wouldn’t have been so bad had the subject not been one they absolutely despise and wish they could get out of studying but alas they’re stuck with it.

They equip their headphones as soon as they plant their butt on the desk chair in their tiny room in their tiny roommate-shared apartment, putting their Spotify playlist on shuffle as they open a blank Power Point document. They work better with music blasting in their ears since the silence tends to be too loud and distracting when they’re trying to focus. So, that way they can also sing their heart out in peace and not get disturbed by the sound of their own off-key singing. Win-win, basically.

Singing ‘Never Forget You’ by Zara Larsson and MNEK, they get a little carried away, ditching the project to enter a full-blown music video they can imagine down to the detail in their mind.

However, there’s a surprise awaiting them.

As soon as MNEK’s part of the song begins, another voice apart from his echoes through their headphones, singing along to the song. Freaking the fuck out, they let out a loud scream, smacking the headset off them, sending the object falling and landing on their laptop keyboard with a crash that only serves to further startle their roommate’s dog which comes to check if they are being attacked or something only to be disappointed by the lack of action.

When pushing the headphones off, they did so with a force strong enough to snap the cable out of the laptop entirely so now the room is filled with the sound of that same foreign voice laughing his ass off.

A voice that belongs to no other than Corpse Husband himself.

“You gotta learn to disconnect from Discord calls, Y/N.“ The fucker says, still cackling wholeheartedly at his partner’s misery.

Pissed off or not, Y/N would have to admit he’s got a point. But they’d also rather never speak again than admit it so...

“Fuck you!“ is what they say instead, seconds before disconnecting.

IV

Making breakfast is not something either Corpse or Y/N are used to, mostly cause they both either wake up late or skip the meal entirely. Regardless, having been given a day off from work and having no classes since it’s Saturday, Y/N saw no better way to start their day off than to prepare a nice breakfast for them and their boyfriend to enjoy. Problem is: they aren’t the most skilled in the kitchen. Sure they can scramble an egg or make mac and cheese, but in order to do it correctly they are not allowed to have distractions of any kind. Not even music, that’s how you know it’s serious.

Seeing as how Corpse has never seen them cook, he’s obviously unaware of theirs. The dummy straight up waltzes into the kitchen, unintentionally remaining unspotted and unheard by Y/N because he’s barefoot and because they have their back turned to him.

“Whatya cooking over there babe?“

Y/N’s focus bubble, being as thin as it is and considering they initially thought Corpse was still asleep, they have every right to let out the yelp they just did, dropping the egg they were gonna crack over the pan in said pan in its entirety - yes, shell and all.

A moment of silence commences: regretful on Corpse’s end and frustrated on theirs. Neither of them dares to say anything to avoid triggering the other. Well, that’s the case until Y/N decides enough’s enough and they turn to look at him, a wide, obviously fake smile plastered onto their face.

“Scrambled eggs, following a secret recipe, property of the L/N family.“

Seems like your pre-breakfast snack is an extra large dose of sarcasm, huh?

V

“So, how was your day? You sound pretty chipper so I take it wasn’t a nightmare like a few days ago.“ Corpse comments over the phone, listening to shuffling and shifting as Y/N moves around the apartment, getting ready to head out.

“It was great actually. Got some important results back and, not to brag or anything, but they were higher than I expected.“ They reply, a genuine wide grin refusing to leave their face as they silently count the amount of money they’ve got in their wallet. “I’m gonna go buy a cake so we can celebrate it. It’s no small deal, trust me, especially not when I initially thought I’d fail both these exams to the point of being pitied.“

“Wait...-“ Corpse attempts, his voice suddenly sounding strained and urgent but that’s the very reason he cannot seem to find or get the right words out of his system. Not that Y/N gives him any time to figure it out.

“No Corpse, you cannot change my mind. Cake and beers, we’re celebrating toni- SHIT!“ They scream as they throw open the front door, bumping square into someone standing on the other side, almost dropping their phone.

Taken aback by embarrassment and fear, they leap back, their eyes searching for the ones of the person whose personal space they just invaded. Well, to be fair, he was the one invading their personal space by standing right outside the door to their - well, to Corpse’s apartment.

The fear and irritation die down almost instantly when Y/N recognizes the person standing opposite them.

“Mind telling me why we’re talking on the phone when you could’ve come in and we could’ve had a normal person conversation?!“ They snap, ironically enough - they’re still holding the phone to their ear.

So is Corpse whos is smiling guiltily, “That’s why I called, I forgot my keys, but I got...carried...sorry.”

Well, at least this serves as proof Y/N’s not the only forgetful one.

                                                            ~  ~  ~

Corpse has been stuck in his recording room for four hours now, never stopping his stream to take care of his basic human needs such as eating or going to the bathroom. This behavior of his has Y/N worried sick and unable to focus on the task at hand - an assignment they’ve been trying to finish for two hours now, sitting with their computer on their lap and looking hopelessly at the blank Word document waiting for them to fill it up while they are waiting for it to start writing itself.

Seeing as how neither are gonna happen, not until Y/N puts their mind at ease, they slowly put the laptop aside, standing up to carefully skip on over to Corpse’s recording room to check on him, stopping by the kitchen to grab him a snack and a bottle of water along the way.

The door to the darkened room is open a crack, as usual, suggesting they can enter without knocking - this also means he’ll probably not hear them even if they knock so the whole gesture would be pointless. Not that Y/N has a tendency to knock or anything... Waltzing in, they find that the only light in the room is the very faint and dark glow of the computer screen which is displaying a dark and dingy room from a first-person view of the protagonist of whatever game Corpse’s currently playing.

“Corpse?!“ They whisper-yell/hiss at him, trying their best to grasp his attention without startling him - they don’t need to be told that the game is of the horror genre and the last thing they need is for their boyfriend to flip backwards and fall out of his chair because they scared the shit out of him. “Hey?!“

Neither attempts prove futile so, despite their best instincts telling them differently, they walk over to him and tap him on the shoulder. The reaction, while within the realm of expectancy, is a lot more startled than they expected, accompanied by a scream on top of all. They’d never heard him scream in fear before, it’s quite amusing if they’re being honest.

They suppress a snicker as Corpse’s wide open eyes meet their squinting ones in the darkness, “Y/N...babe...what is it? Is everything ok?”

Y/N rolls their eyes, “No, everything isn’t ok. Your unhealthy habit of forgetting to take care of yourself, for example.” They put the snack and the bottle on the his desk, giving him their best disappointed-parent look before turning on their heel to strut their way out of the room. However, just as they are about to make their exit, they stop right at the doorframe, giving their stunned one final glance over their shoulder with a smug smirk playing across their face, “Oh and by the way, that’s what I like to call revenge.” Just like that, they leave, pushing the door back into its previous position.

And boy, is it some sweet, sweet revenge.

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[pbelfz]

I think you're the only yandere writer ive seen that includes the details of "ok if the reader is tied up/trapped, how're they gonna use the bathroom." And it adds so much to the realism of your story, and i think is one of the defining factors that separates His from other yandere stories i've read. Like it adds a whole new level of fear and disgust to the story- and honestly it makes the immersion to the story 1,000 times more effective. Usually the reader immersion for me gets completely killed when authors are like "oh they were tied up for days at a time, it was so bad because it was really boring, and their legs got a little sore." Because i had a phase where all i read were historical accounts from Prisoners of War, graphic crime documentaries, etcetera . Like, i know there's a mental toll that comes with isolation, but theres a certain level of fear, pain, dehumanization , that comes with knowing that your body is slowly decaying, and you have no control over even the most basic needs as a human being (like how even animals will avoid defacating on themselves, or like how even dogs might be left alone on a leash, not with their legs bound and mouth muzzled).

One of the only authors ive seen that also goes for this level of realism (though i think their focus is more on portraying the realistic psychological impact of such an abusive relationship) is yanlovex3, though it's been a long time since they've been active.

YES YES YES YES!!! I tried to incorporate a lot of my irl knowledge into the story!! I’ve had jobs where I’ve interacted with clients of all different backgrounds (I’m a social worker), so I’ve become rather desensitized to trauma stories and behavior that is often criminalized. Real experiences also make for great writing inspiration, too.

A lot of my writing in ‘His’ followed a pattern of basic human thought processes and functions, such as, “(Y/n) is angry. What does it look like when someone is angry? What does the body do when a person feels anger? What does anger feel like?,” and so on. I’ve found it’s much easier to describe situations and scenes by breaking down emotions by their simplest, Maslow hierarchy form.

[astudyinfreewill]

hey this may be a stupid question, but it's already been a long time since ive read trk so i don't remember everything properly, so can you explain to me why exactly ganseys behavior in the book is seen as problematic??

hey! don’t worry, there are no stupid questions in my book. in fairness, it’s not about gansey’s behaviour in trk, it’s about his behaviour throughout the whole series. most of his problematic actions all come down to the same basic flaw: self-centeredness. for all that gansey is a generous and loving person, he can’t help but make everything about himself. he is driven by anxiety to define his place in the world beyond his privilege, yet he is blinded by that very same privilege - a bad combination, and one that leads him to show very little empathy for the people he loves.

like many teenagers, he’s looking for affirmation from his friends... but then resents them for not giving it, while failing to see that (most of) his friends are dealing with traumatic issues. when his friends reject his input - because it is not what they need or want at the moment - gansey always, always takes it personally. at no point does he try to ask himself, okay, if this isn’t what my friends need, then what do they need from me and how can i be a better friend? instead, he goes straight into self-pity mode, complaining that his friends reject his support and walk away from him. thing is... it’s not real support if it only makes him feel better and not them.

i don’t really have the time to write an extensive meta on all of the interactions where gansey’s lack of empathy comes into play, but here’s a list of just the most glaring ones in the series, in no particular order:

gansey consistently tries to pay for adam’s way and persuade him to move in with him, even though adam has told him multiple times that he is uncomfortable with it because independence is key to his sense of self as an abuse survivor. sometimes he does this even when he’s fully aware that it will start a fight. despite that, adam is usually the one apologizing, at least on page

notably in trb there’s a scene where gansey tries to get adam to move in with him, but when adam asks what’s going to happen if gansey leaves henrietta - is adam just supposed to drop out of aglionby and follow him? - gansey doesn’t reassure him that’s not gonna happen. he just says adam will have to start again at a new school. 

as i said above, this is not true support because it helps gansey feel better without inconveniencing him, but it is not what adam wants. if gansey wanted to support adam, he’d at least promise he would stay in henrietta for their final year of high school, instead of expecting adam to follow him around the world.

when adam rejects that offer and says he’ll stay in the trailer park, gansey takes it incredibly personally and his first response is to victim-blame adam for his abuse, saying things like: “you let your dad pound the shit out of you. you’re as bad as [your abusive mother]. you think you deserve it.” when adam still refuses to move in, and tells him, rightfully so, that gansey doesn’t know what it’s like for him, gansey follows that up with “don’t pretend you have anything to be proud of”. this is past mean and straight into cruel.

adam is the one who apologizes after this fight. let that sink in.

when thinking back on ronan’s suicide attempt, it is strongly implied in the text - and was made explicit in deleted scenes - that gansey appears to have taken ronan’s suicide attempt not just as a traumatic event, but as a slight against him, and is always vaguely guilt-trippy when it comes up (i.e. you promised me you wouldn’t get suicidal again)

gansey does illegal things on ronan’s behalf, multiple times, without ever wondering if this is what ronan wants, see: bribing school officials to keep ronan in school when ronan explicitly wants to drop out, because staying in school is what gansey thinks he should do. even if gansey’s heart was in the right place (i believe in staying in school), he is essentially involving ronan in illegal dealings against his will.

gansey is happy to share his search for glendower with the others, and delegate tasks to them (adam especially) as long as they do things his way. when adam acts against one of his decisions, gansey is absolutely unable to let that go. and while i understand that he is hurt by the breach of trust, because adam went behind his back, his language is telling: “i did tell him that we were to wait, right?”. you don’t “tell” your friends what they “are to do”. that’s not an equal relationship. 

this is also seen in the way gansey acts with ronan in more of a parental role, actively ordering him about. you know there is a problem when an outside character refers to ronan as “gansey’s dog” and neither gansey nor ronan disagree with this.

there’s the infamous hospital scene in trb, too, which has been excellently analysed in this meta post by @bleachersmp3 and @mericatblackwood, but i’ll say a few words about it anyway

in this scene, adam has just been beaten into losing his hearing. he has just come out of the hospital, bruised and traumatised, and has been told he will now have a permanent disability as a result of his abuse. he is now also homeless, because by pressing charges against his father to protect ronan, he has ensured his parents will kick him out for good. so he is forced to move into monmouth - something we have been told from the start of the book he absolutely did not want, because it was critical to his sense of self not to depend on gansey’s wealth. so, he’s bitter about it.

and okay, that’s not entirely fair, because it wasn’t gansey’s fault. but if your friend had just undergone such horrific trauma, surely you would be a little lenient, and understand they’re not being objective atm, right? well, not gansey. instead, gansey launches into a tirade at him: “what is your problem, adam? [...] is there something about my place that’s too repugnant for you? [...] I’m sick of tiptoeing around your principles!”

when adam snaps at him that he’s being condescending by using highbrow words (we can assume that this is a discussion they’ve had before, because adam tries to get gansey to use more everyday words multiple times in the book, especially when it’s clear that blue doesn’t understand something, so it’s something gansey already know adam finds condescending), gansey goes straight to victim-blaming again, this time with a classist twist thrown in: “i’m sorry your father never taught you the meaning of repugnant. he was too busy smashing your head against the wall of your trailer while you apologized for being alive.”

gansey does not apologize at any point after this fight. 

when adam sacrifices himself to cabeswater - which he does explicitly to stop whelk from murdering one of them and save gansey - gansey takes it as a slight against him, because it goes against what he told adam to do, and sadly asks adam “why? was i so awful?”, showing he has completely misunderstood adam’s reasons. adam tells him, and not for the last time: “it was never about you”.

it clearly doesn’t sink in bc they have the same discussion in the dream thieves, when gansey again asks him why did he go to cabeswater against his orders. he does this in an emotionally manipulative way, too - implying that ronan and blue both think badly of him while gansey has been defending him so adam owes him. adam again tries to tell him “it wasn’t about you”, which gansey refuses to believe, and reminds adam that the glendower search “belongs” to him. adam replies that if gansey wants adam’s help - which gansey relies upon frequently, as it seems like adam is assigned a very large share of research and coming up with ideas - he needs to treat him as an equal

after the fight, when adam has a mental breakdown due to the combination of stress, ptsd, and magically-induced hallucinations, and is found wandering along a highway, clearly dissociating and undergoing amnesia, gansey is still so bitter about their fight that he contemplates leaving him behind in dc, so that “adam will have to apologize for once” (for once???)

consider all this emphasis gansey puts on how much adam betrayed his trust; consider that gansey then spends nearly two books seeing blue behind adam’s back (starting in tdt, through bllb, and halfway through trk)

consider that despite the fact adam takes the reveal gracefully and thanks gansey for his honesty, when adam later in trk is honest with gansey about his feelings for ronan, gansey’s immediate reaction is to assume adam is using ronan as a sexuality experiment and warns him not to break ronan’s heart, because ronan is just so fragile and adam is just so cold

consider that the only basis gansey has for making this assumption is that “adam has hurt him (gansey) so many times before”, but never stops to think about his own responsibility in their disagreements, or whether he ever hurt adam 

as you can see, the vast majority of these are in the first two books, with the exception of the “shovel talk” in trk. i would like to say gansey grows over the series, but i think unfortunately it’s more to do with the fact that starting with bllb, the plot is split between gansey/blue and adam/ronan, so gansey just doesn’t get as many interactions with adam and ronan (he’s still bribing school officials on ronan’s behalf though, including selling monmouth which at the time is where ronan is also living). 

gansey isn’t a bad person, and doesn’t (always) mean badly. he does love his friends. unfortunately, his refusal to see things from anyone’s perspective but his own makes him a toxic friend on a great number of occasions.

[symphonicspecter]

Which mythical creatures/cryptids are your favorite(s)? Feel free to expand upon your answer of you want!

Me thinking about monsters: fuck yeah fuck yeah fuck yeah

Okay so in no particular order

Mothman my beloved. Theres a few of you following me that know one of the reasons he’s a fave but I’m not disclosing that publically. I think as a cryptid he’s very neat because there is an event associated with his sightings!

And while Mothman is most famous for showing up around Point Pleasant before the Silver Bridge collapse, there have been sightings of a similar creature by different names in Mexico and southern US before a swine flu outbreak, and I don’t remember the location but somewhere else before an earthquake. Would be neat if they’re related, like this creature that tries to warn people of disaster. Although of course from the skeptical side it’s probably been misidentifed birds and coincidences. But it’s fun to think about!

Also the typical design of this vaguely bug-bird-human blob that’s pitch black with big eyes is really cute. It’s also just fun to see all the different ways people draw him. And he’s a little bit of a meme which is fun. Fun fact the first time I read about Mothman was in 4th grade and the book had a creepy drawing of him staring through someone’s window, so some nights I was afraid that if I opened the curtains I’d see him staring at me. .

I like the Jersey Devil too, theres a lot of cool designs of him. Like yesss gross demon horse man lets gooo. I also think it’s really interesting how some of the “sightings” are not actually of the creature but of hoofprints and disembodied voices. Somewhere in New Jersey a beast is tap dancing on roofs at night and I think that’s great. .

Fresno Nightcrawlers! They’re fucking pants. They’re just so funny to me. Just these weird little baggy pants lookin guys walking around in people’s yards at night. .

The Chupacabra is another fave of mine and has been for a while. I personally like doglike interpretations better than the alien ones. Spiky vampire dog is such a neat idea. Horrible for your livestock though. Maybe if Chupacabra is real we could tame it 🤔

.

For non-cryptid creatures:

Dragons!! In case it’s not obvious when I have a dragonsona. I’ve loved dragons since I was little. I ALWAYS was the “why do they have to slay the dragon why can’t they befriend the dragon” kid. I had lots of books of dragons as a kid, from story collections to novels to drawing guides to history and famous dragons collections. And I would read them again and again.

Im not quite sure what drew me to dragons versus other mythical creatures at first. Except that they’re very cool and there’s lots if different kinds. Dragons are really cool because they show up in myths all over the world! So there’s lots of stories and lore.

I love how dragons are so popular and varied that there’s lots of designs for them too, and they still continue to be popular creatures, even a fairly common sona!

I think another thing I’ve liked about dragons over the years is the experience of drawing them. Because there’s not just one dragon design, I used to draw dragons a lot to practice different types of animal bodies and colors. And I didn’t feel as pressured for accuracy as I did drawing animals and people.

.

Slenderman. One of the most modern monsters in terms of creation time. I think it’s VERY cool that he’s borne from the Internet, so the spread of his popularity and trends in the myth are recorded. Like, this is a myth that you can find the origin of and view it yourself (I don’t know if the site is still up actually, but I’ve seen screenshots so I know there’s at least that). I really think Slenderman was done dirty by popular media. He deserves a better movie and to be known for more than just bad incidents. I love the wide range of takes though. I know I keep saying that but I really do think it’s neat how people interpret creatures differently. Slenderman is cool in that some people make him scary, others make him funny, or sympathetic. And while typically he’s made scary, or at least spooky, there’s different ways he’s scary. Some people like him as a violent killer, others like him as a psychological predator. It’s really neat that no two Slendermen scare the same way.

Also he’s just a neat looking monster. 10/10 would get a gangly hug

.

Cerberus/hellhounds. They’re scary looking but they’re just puppies! Good boys and good girls! Houndoom is one of my favorite pokemon too (it’s inspired by hellhounds)

.

On one hand, manticores are not one of the first creatures that come to mind, BUT whenever I see one I always think oh !!! How cool!!! They have a very cool design! While it’s never said explicitly in The Divine Comedy that Geryon is a manticore, his design is clearly based on one. I love that “the beast of fraud” has “the face of an honest man” but when you look beyond that it’s a monstrous body, it’s a symbol of deception! .

W*nd*gos are incredibly controversial bc of their origin and the usual design for them is inaccurate, but I’m using that as a reference point here. The actual myth of these creatures I’m not as much a fan of. However, the “big black furry beast with a skull head” is one of my fave designs. I’ve seen some proposals for calling this design pucca after the black shapeshifting creature instead! Tbh I think we need a new name entirely since this type of monster seems detached from other myths. It’s just a very neat design that I wish we could call something else!

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Okay ummm that’s it with naming I think. But I like all sorts of weird creatures! I like animalistic looking ones more than humanoid or abstract. Ive probably said it many times before but I love monsters that are actually sweet or friendly.

[grocerystoredean]

Dude i love the internet sometimss i go to someones blog and theyre like “sideblog is at x” and im like !!!???! DUDE???? Sometimes i think i know three people but they turn out to all be the same person on different accounts and it makes me love them more. Theres someone, like longtime friend, on my discord server who im not entirely sure is actually a separate person or another account for the same person but like. Ive known these people for like 3 years now so i cant really ask??

I feel like ive said this before but worst thing in the world is not knowing if something you do or experience is normal -

My sisters dog is growling at nothing right now but she was kinda asleep and now shes up and wagging her tail so probably im not about to get nerfed by a ghost. If i dont send this ask you’ll know ig.

- anyway so then youre googling hospital robots at two in the morning and for some reason the internet doesn’t know what you mean by that. Idk the human experience is so varied and seriously what how are there so many ways to do things the world is so crazy. I wanna live in the same house with someone i share no language with and see how that would work out. I think im pretty good at nonverbal communication and also it would be rad af to halfway not know whats going on half the time but it would be in a fun way this time. My neighbor, when i was bad at chinese or having trouble learning or whatever offered to drop me off on the streets of beijing and pick me up three days later, he said by then id know the language. At the time that scared me, and i dont know how good of an idea that specifically is but idk id do it. Its just so wild how many things there are yknow??

Honestly i feel like i had other funnier things to say but i cant remember any of them so instead how about you tell me how youre doing? How was your new year and being back at school and whatnot? Seen any cool critters?

omg hi dba! answer for this and the rest of ur asks under the cut!!!

i think u can ask. i dont think its that rude. its a wide internet out there. im really careful abt keeping track of sideblogs and im super weird abt like who i follow i have neuroses abt it and stuff but so anyway i do keep exact track of who is who. if i interact via a sideblog i constantly keep track.

as for the varied and wild human experience yes so much. i dont think its a good idea to do that but my dad said when he lived in south america for a little while as a kid he picked up spanish really quick so it's true. i love thinking about the complex inner lives of everyone around me. andrew garfield voice i think you could fall in love with anyone if you knew their story.

my new year was very boring lol i literally watched doctor who on da couch but it was good. as for critters i was getting high a while back (sorry kids. dont do drugs etc) and a deer literally came out of the woods and walked right by me. like it was not 5 feet from me i could have reached out and touched it. it was sososo cool.

okay so when u sent this i was actually blogging while on a discord call with tumblr user transfagshit / carriecoded and so we were a little incomprehensible on the dash. our blogs should be viewed together in tandem from that night in order to piece together any jokes

analyzing supernatural actually has nothing to do with being smart and everything to do with bullshitting. all analysis is going hey you know what would be funny. if i said this. i have a post somewhere that keeps being tagged as like meta and or whatever and i genuinely have no idea what i was saying. i typed it frantically at 1am. so clearly its at least a little bit bullshitting. its not exhausting at all because were all doing it as a bit. writing supernatural posts fills the hole in my heart that having not taken an english class in 2.5 years left. its a hobby.

fsdakjsfdlkjf thanks bro. it'll be okay. someone died recently. which hasnt been fun. but i'm okay. or i will be or whatever. life goes on etc. i'll be fine! nevertheless he blogged etc

the only thing with the omega variant is it is the last greek letter, which means we would have to do the million other variants first. which would suck. but god if we got there we would NEED the laugh. we earned the laugh. for getting through that. also dont apologize i love receiving ur asks!!! bussin. i feel like that word had a real cultural moment 5 months ago and i havent seen it since thank u for reminding me. i hope youre also having a lovely time wherever you are

[shhh-no-ones-home]

saving graces marcus moreno x reader

+++++++++

Prompt: “You dont strike me as a professional criminal.” “thats what makes me so good at it.”

song: knife under my pillow by maggie lindemann

tag list: @cynic-spirit

+++++++++

"im starting to get worried about her. she just sits in her room all day, shutting everyone out. and before you ask, yes i have invited her to all of our outings but she always tells me no... i dont know what to do at this point. shes gonna have to leave for work eventually; im not paying rent by myself."

i heard my roommate say from her room. i stood with my back against my bedroom door and sighed. i didnt need to read her mind to know what she thought of me, it was pretty apparent. not that i could control it anyway. it kind of came and went.

"Bradly its a problem!"

she said loudly and i closed my eyes, shoving my hands deep in my hoodie pockets. 'maybe shes depressed again.' i heard him say and i snapped my eyes back open. nope i definitely didnt want to be in his head right now. i just shook it off, pulling my bedroom door open and crossing the hall. i knocked on her doorframe lightly and she paused, staring at me with wide eyes.

"im going out, i probably wont be back for a while."

i said in a soft voice and she nodded, mouth hung slightly open. i didnt wait for her to say anything back, i just made my way through the apartment and to the front door. when i swung it open the cool breeze hit me in the face immediately. it was late autumn but it was only just beginning to feel like it; we did live in a pretty warm city after all. i hummed at the thought as i pressed my way down the stairs and onto the sidewalk. town was only a ten minute walk and usually i could make it without running into anyone.

i guess that wasnt going to happen today though. as i saw a woman about my age walk towards me i ducked my head down, lifting the hood of my jacket over my head. 'oh thats cute, i should get one, wonder where she got it.' i heard and i shook my head. 'maybe i could google the motif, what was it again? oh well.' she thought and i rolled my eyes, quickening my pace to get away from her.

as i came to the stop light at the end of the street i was met with a few other people waiting to cross like me. 'did i put my grocery list back in my bag?' came from the old woman. 'i wonder what would happen if i crossed the street before the light turned green.' came from the the teen in the blue hoodie, standing away from his mom. i just looked to him and drew my brows. 'i really need to stop wearing my good heels to work, theyre starting to scuff and i dont have money to get them fixed.' came from his mom. i just rolled my eyes at her and looked back to the stop light.

as soon as it turned white i walked across the street with the group, nodding to a man walking his dog in the opposite direction. he nodded back but didnt think anything, or not that i could hear. that was a relief. i bit my tongue as i got closer to the corner store. usually i could get away with stealing a few things here and there, tucking them into my hoodie. it was usually small but pricey stuff i knew i could sell online. lord knows i need the money, i haven't told my roommate that i got laid off about a month ago and this was my only source of income currently. the only good thing about it was that i could sometimes read the minds of the people around me to know if they suspected anything. but i always made sure to buy something just in case.

i stepped inside of the store and smiled at the clerk as she waved at me. i had been coming in long enough that they all kind of knew me by now, something to keep me on their positive side and not think anything bad about me. they knew i liked to walk around for a little bit before checking out, a new energy drink flavor and snack chip bag in hand.

i made my way down a few aisles, picking a few things up and looking over them before putting them back. i knew the store like the back of my hand and knew just where the security camera blind spots where. i looked up to one and stepped around the shelf to be in front of the endcap. in front of me was a new shipment set of headphones, each twenty five dollars a piece. jackpot. i picked two off the shelf, closing my eyes to see if anyone was around. nothing. i looked too before slipping them into my pocket.

when i rounded the corner again to the next aisle i froze. there was a man standing there but he didnt look away from the product he was reading the back of. i just stepped slowly down the aisle, looking at a few items, pushing them around the shelf. when i felt his eyes on me i tensed. 'interesting choice of attire.' i heard and i rolled my eyes. i turned and faced him to walk further down the aisle but he looked away quickly. 'oh shes cute though.' i heard and i could feel my heartbeat quicken. then a few others thoughts made their way into my brain.

"shut up."

i whispered to myself, rubbing the side of my head and closing my eyes tightly.

'thats a lot of shit.' 'maybe i could get this with my next paycheck.' 'damn i needed that but theyre all gone.' All the patrons thoughts flooded into my brain at once and i couldn't focus anymore. i moved my other hand up and held my head in place, swaying back and forth. 'damn, is she alright? maybe i should help.' i heard him again, singled out as the others moved around. it was like i could pluck them out of the air with my bare hands. i just shook my head, falling into the shelf to my right and knocking a few things off of it.

"excuse me, are you alright?"

he asked and i snapped my eyes open. he was stood in front of me with a concerned look on his face but leaned back when i looked at him. 'she did not have purple eyes a minute ago.' he thought and i drew my brows, shaking my head and sliding to the ground. then i felt his hand on my shoulder.

"do you need some help? can i call someone?"

he asked but it was hard to hear. everyone was so loud all of a sudden. i just dug my nails into my hood.

"make it stop."

i cried out.

"make what stop?"

"the voices."

i said, looking back to him. he tried to study my face for a moment and i couldn't pick his voice out of the crowd anymore.

"do you have powers?"

he asked quietly as a tear slipped down my cheek. i swallowed hard, looking over his face.

"i dont know."

i said, my lip trembling. he sent me a soft smile.

"im marcus, im the leader of the heroics. and ive seen enough new powers to know when someone has them. you said you heard voices... are you a telepath?"

he asked and i shrugged.

"i think so but i cant control it. i hear them sometimes but not always, and i can never tell when im just gonna invade someone's brain."

i confessed and the voices stopped.

"let me help you."

he said, taking my arm and helping me to my feet. i wiped the tears away and tucked my hands into my pocket. my eyes got wide when i felt it was empty.

"shit."

i mumbled under my breath, looking to the floor and seeing both sets of headphones on the floor amongst a few of the items that had fallen when i did.

"oh, was some of that yours?"

he asked innocently and i shook my head no, squatting down and picking up my wallet.

"nope, just missing this."

i said, stuffing it back in my pocket and placing the stuff back on the shelf, holding the headphones up for him to see.

"i dont think these go here, ill go put them back."

he nodded and i turned my back to him, rounding the corner and shoving them back in my pocket. i grumbled to myself as i stepped forward towards the food part of the store.

"going so soon?"

i heard him say behind me and i slowly turned to face him.

"uh i came for something, i might as well get it."

i said and he nodded, walking to me.

"mind if i join? i really did mean i wanted to help. i know someone you could talk to."

i scoffed at him as he followed me down the chip aisle.

"yeah and by help you mean people who will experiment on me to figure out how my powers work."

"thats not it at all."

he said a little hurt, holding the basket he had loosely in his hand as i plucked some hot chips off the shelf.

"yeah, sure."

i said and he sighed, following me to the other end of the aisle and raising his brow at me as i plucked an energy drink off the shelf too.

"if you come with me we can figure out how they work, together, and we can train you-"

"to be a heroic? i dont think so."

i said with a short laugh, walking quickly to the register.

"why not?"

he asked and i snorted, paying for my goods and taking the bag from the woman with a small thank you. he just placed the basket he was holding on the counter and followed me out of the store, abandoning it.

"look, i dont want to be a superhero. i can barely handle life as it is and know i wouldnt be able to save anyone, now will you please just leave me alone."

i said and i heard him stop following me.

“when i first saw you You didnt strike me as a professional criminal.”

he said and i froze in my tracks. i was almost on the other side of the parking lot already. i should just keep going. but damnit i cant. i looked down and shook my head before turning around. i pulled the headphones out of my pocket and waved them in the air.

“thats what makes me so good at it.”

i said snarkily before moving to walk away from him, tucking them back in my pocket and keeping on my way. i continued back on the path i had taken to get to the store, stopping at the light as it turned red. when a car pulled up beside me on the wrong side of the road i looked to him like he was crazy.

"what the hell are you doing?!"

i asked and he nodded towards the passenger side.

"please, at least let me drive you home, we can talk."

he said and i shook my head in disbelief.

"why would i get in a car with you? you drive on the wrong side of the road."

i acknowledged, walking when the light turned white. he just pulled his car in front of me and parked it, getting out and standing tall over me.

"please."

he said and i rolled my eyes.

"look, marcus, i think youre cute too but this is not how to get a date."

i said, side stepping him but he caught my arm.

"why did you steal that stuff?"

he asked and i looked from his arm to his face.

"i dont owe you my life story."

"and i dont need to be a telepath to know you need this."

he said, letting me go. i just looked over his face before he reached into his back pocket and pulled out a business card.

"please, just think about it. i do want to help you. just think about it."

i took the card and scanned it, shoving it into my pocket after.

"fine."

[yikesharringrove]

the fic you wrote for my last prompt was amazing, ty 😭 can you do 50 + 56 this time please? and if you want to work in dyslexic!steve too that would be awesome! 🥰

You are speaking my fuckin’ language, dyslexic Steve is my ABSOLUTE jam. Honestly, whenever I write Steve, he’s dyslexic, although sometimes it’s not mentioned because it’s not important to Harry’s journey @ jk rowling

Thank you for your request! I’m really glad you liked the other one I wrote! You’re anonymous so I don’t know which one that is but I really enjoyed writing them all! Sorry for my manic energy rn.

Something a little different, it’s modern au! This is probably nothing like what you were thinking so I’m sorry, but I kinda love it ngl.

50: Secret Admirer

56: “I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.”

Prompt list!

Billy spent three and a half hours reading through every single tweet on the account.

There were so fucking many of them. The earliest one was timestamped from four days ago, so obviously, this person had no life outside of tweeting.

Tweeting about Billy.

He had a few personal favorites. He had retweeted them to his account, figuring may as well play it up, make a joke outta everything.

@ImHardForHargrove: sorry WHOMST gave you the RIGHT to have eyes that fuckin blue im YELLING

@ImHardForHargrove: watchin u play basketball is a religious experience y are ur arms so BIG hhnnnng

And Billy’s absolute favorite, which he pinned right at the top of his account

@ImHardForHargrove: ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass

Billy knew he looked good. Knew he turned heads wherever he went. He did that on purpose. But realizing someone at Hawkins High had set up a thirst account for him, well.

“I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.” Billy had explained the situation to Robin, letting her go through the account on his phone. “Like, It’s kinda nice, whoever this guy is, he’s got a crush. But also like, It’s kinda creepy. Plus he’s objectifying me,” Billy was talking through his sandwich.

Robin made a face of disgust. “Why do you keep saying ‘he’? All of the girls in this fucking school are practically drooling for you.”

“Hard for Hargrove, Robin. I know you’re like, revolted by the peen and whatever but that does not excuse a lack of basic sexual education and anatomy.” She gagged at him. Honest to God, gagged. He thought she was gonna spew all over the table.

“If I ever hear you call it a peen ever again, it’s on sight Hargrove.” Heather plopped herself down next to Robin, kissing her cheek before zeroing in on Billy’s phone, still in Robin’s hand.

“Have you guys worked out who it could be yet?” Her eyes were wide at Billy.

“Billy says he thinks its a guy even though people with penises aren’t necessarily men.” Robin gave him a pointed look.

“Yeah Robin, I know that, but, I don’t know I just think it’s a guy penis-having person.”

Heather narrowed her eyes at him. “Do you actually think that, or are you just hoping in that goblin little brain of yours that this account is Steve Harrington’s.” Billy could feel the heat spread down his neck.

“Billy, I know Steve is like, the only out guy in this whole fucking town, but you can do way better than him.  PLUS, I feel like it makes more sense if the person running this account wasn’t out and had to channel their gay yearning through social media.”

“First of all Robin, you have this vendetta against Steve that I don’t get. He’s a nice guy. He’s kinda dopey, kinda dumb, but he’s like, sweet and shit. Second, I’m not out, so it still could be him because he doesn’t think I would, like, accept his advances or whatever. Hence, gay internet yearning.” The chime of the bell sent them packing their lunches, Billy’s phone vibrated in Robin’s hand. She rolled her eyes when he realized he turned on notifications for the account

“Get a fucking life you loser.” She slapped the phone into his hand. He opened the new tweet with embarrassing zeal.

@ImHardForHargrove: i saw u talking with ur mouth full and it was yucky but i was still  🥺🥺

His head shot up, trying to see who would have been facing him during lunch, but the cafeteria was almost empty.

The rest of the week Billy took deliberate care of every interaction he had with anyone. Observing who was in his surroundings, and making note of everything he did and said. He took extra caution around Steve, wanting to spot any minute detail that could give away who ran the account.

The account started blowing up. People were retweeting like fucking crazy. Everywhere he went, he was being asked if he’s seen it, like he doesn’t regularly retweet the good ones. The search for the owner of the account had spread throughout the whole school. A few girls even tried to claim the account was theirs, but every time that happened the account would tweet out something to discredit whoever made the claim, proving them a liar.

Billy was starting to lose hope it was Harrington. The tweets were coming at all different times, posted whenever the person thought about it, so Billy was losing track of who was near when he said or did something. And the tweets were always about stupid stuff Billy didn’t register doing. On Wednesday night the account said

@ImHardForHargrove: hi when you chew on your pencil and it makes me 🥴 that is all thx for comin to my ted talk

Friday afternoon gave them all:

@ImHardForHargrove: walked past ur classroom and u were asleep ive never wanted to CUDDLE someone so bad in my LIFE

But Saturday, Saturday renewed all hope for Harrington Billy could possibly have. Lauren Kranz was throwing a party. It was the first real rager in a while, so everyone was there, and everyone was sloshed. Everyone but Billy, who’d agreed to be designated driver for Robin and Heather like some kinda idiot.

He was brooding on the back porch when his phone went off. The account was active, and the owner was drunk.

@ImHardForHargrove: I can seeeeee u oyt the windw I wan u 2 FUC ME. RAW DOG.

@ImHardForHargrove: srry ur so beauitiful nd THICCC

@ImHardForHargrove: I wana shoot my shot but idk if u lik bois

@ImHardForHargrove: (ys i am boi)

@ImHardForHargrove: nd i dont wana get my heart broken agin 😥

He was right about it being a guy. He was right about him being too nervous to approach him outright. His brain was screaming stevestevesteve at him. Hawkins was shook when Steve came out as bisexual in his sophomore year. He was the golden boy, a real jock. He was NOT the kind of guy people would assume queer in a small midwestern town.

He was kind of a douchebag, dumping one girl for another, sleeping with her and never calling again. But then he settled down with this guy from the University of Indianapolis for a few months until Steve caught him cheating. Apparently, he had slashed the guy’s tires. Billy was impressed.

The next year came Wheeler, who only stuck around long enough to make sure Steve was nice and whipped before she fucked off on him too. So Steve retreated. Spent more time with middle schoolers than anybody else. Didn’t want to put his heart on the line anymore until he knew it wouldn’t be stomped on.  Billy could respect that.

Billy couldn’t risk being out in a town like Hawkins. Word always had a way of getting right back to his dad, and in a tiny hick town with nothing better to do than gossip, it was usually only a matter of hours before Neil heard something he didn’t like.

@ImHardForHargrove: srry 4 bad typing rn. drunk nd dysl exic ren’t a happy combo

Billy’s heart stopped. The drunken idiot was giving himself away. Maybe if he sat here staring at the account long enough, enough would be revealed he could figure it all out like a shitty drunk episode of Blue’s Clues.

He was so focused on Twitter, refreshing his feed, again and again, he didn’t notice a very drunk, and very unsteady Steve Harrington stumbling out the back door towards him. Until he crashed into his back.

“Sorry, Bill!” Billy had Steve by the shoulders trying to keep him upright. “Heyy I have a question for you.” Steve grabbed one of Billy’s hands and veered over to the table and chairs arranged neatly on the small patio. When they were sitting, Steve kept ahold of Billy’s hand.

“Hi.” Steve was smiling like a little kid. Billy was in fucking love.

“hey, Harrington. What was your question.”

“So-oo. I have this friend. A very good friend. Super close. And he has a big ol’ crush on you but he’s too scared to ask you himself because he keeps getting his heart fuckin’ broken so he wanted me to ask. Are you into guys?” It’s a miracle Billy understood any of that, every word blending into the next.

“That depends.” Billy leaned in, running his tongue along his bottom lip. He saw Steve take in a sharp breath, following the movement with his glazed eyes. He knew Steve was talking about himself, he just wanted to rile him up a little. Make him blush first. “This friend you’re talkin’ about. He’s our age? Like you’re not trying to set me up with one a’ your kids, right?” Steve physically recoiled.

“NO, you fuckin’ pedo. I’m NOT trying to set you up with a fuckin’, fuckin’ middle schooler. My friend is, uh eighteen. He’s a senior.” Unless Tommy fuckin’ H. suddenly had a penchant for dick Billy didn’t know about, Steve was 100% talking about himself.

“Well, if he’s as pretty as you are, I’d love to go out with him sometime.” Billy winked. Steve went red.

“Okay, but like, does that mean you’d go out with me? Like I’m as pretty as me, right? Because I was talking about me. Not ‘a friend’ I was talking about me. Steve.”

“Yeah, I kinda figured that out. You know, I was hoping it was you running that Twitter. Any time you’d tweet out something you wanted to do with me, I was always picturin’ doing it with you, Baby.” Billy was practically purring. “Especially all the shit you wanted me to do TO you.” Steve gave something between a whine and a groan and flopped himself onto Billy’s lap, straddling him with very little grace.

“Thank God. ‘Cause you’re so fucking hot I’d let you do anything to me. Anything, Bill.” Billy smiled softly at him.

“Then let me take you home. Let me put you in bed to sleep off all this. And let me take you to breakfast tomorrow. Something nice and greasy for your hangover tummy.” Steve was a puddle in Billy’s lap. “C’mon, Drunky, git your ass up.” Steve just giggled and muttered Drunky Skunky under his breath.

Billy sighed and stood up, hefting Steve up with him.

“Bil-ly,” Steve whined. “You’re so strong, this is so fucking hot. I gotta tweet about this.”

“Tweet it later, Sweet Thing.”

It took Billy for-fucking-ever to find Robin and Heather (they were making out in the basement with the stoners). But Steve chirped and cooed into his ear, so happy Billy could lift him and hold him like it was nothing.

The last tweet from the account was timestamped from Sunday evening.

@ImHardForHargrove: Hi this is Steve. Billy’s my boyfriend now 🥰#ThirstWorks

[savnofilter]

hey guys, i just wanted to speak up about something because i have been getting questions if i was well and stuff and im not really sure these days. mainly because i have become uncomfortable on this blog.

and i beg that people who dont like me, please do not spread things about me please or this because i thought i owe this to my followers.

the reason as to why i feel uncomfortable is because it really dawned upon me that being here doesnt make me happy anymore. and you could see in how flat my writing has become, or how my behavior often changes from happy to sad/low in a quick second.

and since after the summer, being on here has been almost terrible for me. like i use to have many friends, many people i talked to or felt like i created a bond with a lifetime, just kind of up and left me in the dust. while i finally took the time to focus on me for once, they used it against me, they got mad at me and its just hard to keep quiet about since it has always been my goal to talk about my feelings and now i dont think i can anymore, as to why im writing this to you guys tonight..

i will not get into depth (or specific) about it because i feel like the more i try to explain myself, the more twisted it becomes. and instead of helping me, it hurts me.

over the few months, i found when i was taking breaks to be happier. 

and its not the thought of you guys, it was more of like the lingering feeling of the way i was treated by people lingering on my blog. and im afraid if i feel like this still holds truth, i will be leaving this blog sooner or later.

in truth, i feel like ive been mistreated or even to the point where my feelings were so construed that it felt like i have been gaslighted over and over and over again. and honestly i am not as mentally or emotionally mature as many people on here, and some of them know that but it was never regarded.

im sad that this experience has come to this, because i really loved interacting, interacting with everyone and sharing my stories, but with the bad experiences on here has even turned my love/passion for writing down -- and even watching anime. i feel reminded every time i see certain blogs all over my feed, or like “hey im safe with these group of people” then they would pop up again. i felt like im some sort of villain or like an unintelligent-idiot who cant think for themselves. and while people who brainlessly follow those people can blindly hate me is fine, because i will never change who i am for anyone. ever. and i hate having to make posts like these because i feel bad for being so angsty and not being the sav that you guys know because while the brand “savnofilter” or “sav” is an extension of me, i sometimes feel so detached because of how shut out ive fell in this fandom for like 5 months now.

and i sincerely apologize to any new followers, i use to not be this down all the time but it really has been brought to my attention that the only social media that has heightened my anxiety, my depression, and even a part of illnesses i thought went away has resurfaced all because of what has happened associated to this blog.

whether it be being shut out and begging for help from the people i thought would be friends, or that i was kicked to the curve simply because i was not in the right state of mind and basically told me it was my fault for being that way.

and when it was fun, when i had friends it never felt like a chore for me on here. but as i lose support like that, it just hurts even though i have someone who stays beside me all the time. once you lose that, that, ground you start to compare yourself, like normal human nature i think. i started too look at my blog and be like “why arent i getting as much as before, what am i doing wrong, what is so bad about my stuff thats good with theres”. and part of the factor was that its odd, because it wasnt even a place of jealousy. it was one of, how did i fall to be so unimportant? so... immaterial. and it was like, each writer i fell out with, everyone just followed them and im left here trying my best to fill in their spots because i missed having that friend group, or friends with me. the only who really cared for me even with the biggest arguments and hoenstly it was because they were the only the one that cared for me. and i am not trying to cause discourse so please do not contact other people about this.

and as much as i stay at this point to irk the people who want me gone, i feel like the subtle unintentional (or intentional) bad vibes being brought to me is choking me up. and its doing well.

it just, it was so odd being treated like actual shit. like dog dooky shit. like if i was the poop on the sidewalk that you walk around and wonder who fucking took that massive shit, shit. and i was afraid to speak up about it because i was afraid of the backlash id get for having fucking feelings. 

from someone who went through some shit when i was younger, and built this barrier, to being repeatedly told over and over again that my feelings are invalid, to have people to tell me “i wont do that too you” and then do it to me just made me grow as a person. or die as a person. im not sure yet.

not only was it a mixture of people leaving me for shitty reasons, it was how stupid this fandom got. yeah, stupid. completely idiotic. of course there are people who sense-ful(?) and i love you a lot for it. but like ive said before, its unfair, there is no love like there use to be. people arent how they use to be. people put on a show, but once behind close doors its completely different. and if youre thinking of anyone in specific, youve got some shit to reevaluate. 

i was so scared to talk about it before because i was so scared at the backlash id get because i was so tired for being the hurt one and being called the bad guy. and im not blind to me being a bitch, but when i feel like ive done something im upfront about it. im rambling but this happens when i finally let my thoughts out.

and if ive been truthful, ive fallen out of my routine with meeting up with my therapist which may one of the reasons i let it run on this long without really getting a clear conscience. and like ive said before, i had thought it had to do with my life but honestly the only grief i get is being on here. 

to be honest, i have projects and requests i really want to complete before i even leave. so maybe its a while before i leave, maybe if it gets too much i’ll just go. i do not know. but 2020 is the year i finally want to take my own health over everyone else before i did before. and even with how hurt i am, i still hold so much love for these people. so much. but ive always been too loyal.

i am sorry for this sorrowful note, but i do not know how much longer i will stay. i love you all, have a blessed night.