#originally i was gonna write old idea from early prompt

[tsukikoayanosuke]

A Harvest Moon Tale  - Ruikasa Week 2023

Day 7: Free Day (Childhood Friends)

"Raaaaaar! Flower Bud village belongs to me!"

"Stop you evil being! I, Pegasus the Shining, will protect the village! Cosmic beam!"

Rui fell down to his knees. "Aah! You got me!" He dropped, tongue out with a loud dramatic 'blegh'.

"Ahahaha! Flower Bud village is saved! Thanks to Pegasus the Shining!" His friend laughed before laying on the ground next to Rui. "That's so fun!"

Rui looked up at his friend, smiling at him. "It is." Then he remembered something. "Oh. I want to show you something." He opened his backpack and took out a handmade book.

"A book?" His friend leaned closer. Rui opened the first book and his friend's eyes widened when he saw Rui's drawing of their character. "Pegasus the Shining! You've been writing it?"

"Mhmm! I want to remember this story forever, so I write it down."

"That's so cool! You're so smart Rui!"

Rui picked up his colored pencils and started to write. His friends watched him through, adding more flare along the way. They doodled on the pages and added various stickers.

"There," Rui said proudly as he closed his book. He stared at his friend. An idea popped in his head. "Here," he offered the book to them.

"Huh?"

"Keep it."

"But it's your book."

"I want you to keep it." Rui put the book on his friend's lap. "Next time I visit, we can write a new book. So, keep it safe, okay?"

His friend picked up the book, looking through the pages in astonishment. His friends grinned at him. "Alright!" They hugged the book close to his chest. "You can count on me!"

——————————————————————————————

The library was the last place Rui visited during his first day back in Flower Bud Village. The door's bell chimed and the young man behind the table looked up from his book. "Hmm? I don't think I recognize you..."

"I just moved here," Rui said. "Just visiting to say 'hi' while I'm going around the village."

"Moved...Oh!" The young man's sunset eyes widened. "Are you the new guy at the old man's farm?"

"That's me. I'm Rui Kamishiro." Rui offered a hand and the young man took it for some excited shakes.

"Tsukasa Tenma! The librarian." Tsukasa brightly smiled and Rui had to admit that it was an infectious smile. "Ah, this is embarrassing! I forgot that Mama said there will be someone new moving in to restore the old man's farm. I should've prepared a welcoming gift."

"There's no need. But I'm assuming you're the mayor's son then?"

"That's right! I'll visit the farm soon. With a proper welcome this time!"

"Well, I'll be waiting for you then."

Tsukasa did fulfill his words, bringing a bouquet of Moondrop Flowers and staying to pull some weed.

——————————————————————————————

Rui entered the library first thing in the morning after going to the Shinonome's shop for their work table.

"Hey there," Tsukasa greeted.

"Hi. Look what I found." Rui dug in his backpack and took out the thing that he just fixed. He put it on the table for Tsukasa to see.

"A music box?"

"I was doing some digging and found this. Had a treasure map as well."

Tsukasa hummed. "I've never thought that you're an adventurous type."

"I surprised myself too. Want to listen to it?"

"Sure!"

Rui winded up the music box. The sound that came out was nostalgic. It reminded him of Grandpa and that one summer visit.

"What a beautiful melody..." Tsukasa muttered. Rui looked at him. Tsukasa was focusing on the music box, elbow on the table and cheek on his palm. His eyes were fluttering, almost as if he was about to fall asleep from the lullaby.

Rui made up his mind. "You can keep it," he said.

Tsukasa looked up in surprise. "Eh? Are you sure? But isn't this your buried treasure?"

"I want you to have it." Rui pushed the music box closer to Tsukasa with a gentle smile. "I can always try to build a new one. So, keep it safe, okay?"

Tsukasa looked at him and the music box back and forth. He grinned widely. "Alright! You can count on me!"

Huh. That sounded very familiar.

——————————————————————————————

"I think it's kinda ironic that you're a farmer and you don't like vegetables."

"I'm giving it to the people who need them more."

"Then what you've been eating all this time?"

"Did you know the bakery's bread is so good?"

"Are you saying that you've been eating cinnamon rolls for breakfast all this time?"

Rui didn't answer. The judgmental stare from Tsukasa made him sweat. It was easy to put two-on-two together. "Rui!"

"I have eggs too..." Rui whined.

Tsukasa put his hands on his hips like a scolding mother. "Vegetables are important! It's for your nutrition!"

Rui pouted. "That's just a myth. Look at me. I'm doing fine until now."

"You're sure a picky eater." Tsukasa sighed. "If I'm living with you, I'll make sure to make you eat vegetables more."

Rui paused from putting the cake into his mouth. Did Tsukasa even realize what he just said?

"You know what?" He pointed his finger at Rui, a determined glint in his eyes. "Tomorrow, I'll make you a dish that'll make you love vegetables!"

Rui chuckled nervously. "I don't think that'll work."

"There's no harm in trying! So be prepared!"

"Oh, dear..." Rui finally ate the cake. But it was too hard for a cake. And metal-y. Rui spitted the thing onto his fork. "Oh." It was a coin.

"Rui! That's the coin!" Tsukasa gasped. "You're the king!"

Rui chuckled. "I guess I am~"

The mayor noticed this and announced, "The king next year will be Mister Rui Kamishiro!" She approached, shaking Rui's hand after he put down his plate of cake. "Congratulation, young man. You'll be playing an active part in next year's sowing festival and spirit festival."

"Ah, thank you very much." Rui smiled.

"Alright. Let's start the dance!" The mayor clapped. "Everyone, choose your partner!"

Rui looked around as everyone moved to find their partner. Rui turned to Tsukasa. "Tsukasa." He offered a hand at him. "Will you dance with me?"

Tsukasa's eyes widened slightly before smiling gently which made Rui's heart skip. "Of course."

The dance was fun despite none of them being good at it.

——————————————————————————————

It was raining when Rui's knocked at the mayor's door. The door was opened, revealing Tsukasa's little sister. "Oh. Rui!"

"Hi, Saki." Rui smiled, lifting his cooked poached fish that he made this morning. "The library is closed today and I was wondering where Tsukasa is."

"Oh, he's feeling a bit under the weather," Saki said with a sad tone. "Would you like to visit him?"

"Of course." There was no way Rui would pass this. How can he refuse in visiting a sick friend? Saki led him to the loft where Tsukasa was staying.

Saki popped his head from the stairs. "Tsukasa! You have a visitor." She called. Then, she turned to Rui. "I'll leave you two alone, okay?"

Rui smiled at her as a thank you. It was the first time Rui ever came into Tsukasa's loft - or bedroom. It was simply decorated, which was something Rui wasn't expected from a loud and bright young man like him. The owner himself was on the bed, sitting up slowly. "Hi, Rui," he said, voice hoarse and red face.

Rui smiled and sat on the stool beside the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"Not great honestly." Tsukasa smiled sheepishly. "That's very kind of you to visit. Thank you."

"There's no need to thank me. Just focus on getting better soon."

"But you're here. I can't just fall asleep."

"I don't really mind."

Rui guided Tsukasa to lay back down and he didn't even fight back, too sick to even protest which tugged something in Rui's heart.

"You know, I had a silly dream," Tsukasa mumbled.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I was a superhero trying to protect the village from this evil magician." Tsukasa laughed but followed with a cough. "I called myself Pegasus the Shining."

Rui's eyes widened. There was it again. The feeling of recognition, like having to remember something.

"Well," Rui cleared his throat, "strange dreams can happen when you're sick."

"Kinda feeling nostalgic for some reason," Tsukasa laughed a little. "I've forgotten a lot of things about my childhood. Maybe Pegasus the Shining is one of them."

So, it wasn't just Rui. Perhaps they could bond even more between them. "Perhaps..."

——————————————————————————————

"Hey, Rui!"

Rui had just come out from milking his cow when Tsukasa arrived at his farm.

"Ah, Tsukasa." Rui waved as he approached him. "What can you do for you?"

Tsukasa cleared his throat as if to prepare himself for a speech. Then he struck a post, hand on his chest and the other stretched toward Rui. "Rui Kamishiro," he said, voice booming, "I would like to invite you to the Star Festival tonight! I'll be performing at the church but I want to take you to the mountain as well." This bravado flattered a bit as his eyes shifted and a blush appeared on his face. "But if you don't want to that's fine."

Rui chuckled. He's so adorable. "I'll come."

Tsukasa perked up. "Really?"

"I want to see the stars with you too." Rui smiled at him.

Tsukasa grinned at him; a grin that Rui grew to love, and he could practically see him vibrating in excitement. "Well, I'll see you tonight." Rui nodded and Tsukasa skipped away.

Rui did come to the church, not even thinking of skipping Tsukasa's performance. Tsukasa played the flute with Saki (who played the piano) dan the vineyard son, Touya (who played the violin). It was a wonderful performance, but Rui's eyes were always on Tsukasa, admiring how he looked even brighter in the center.

After that, the two of them headed to the mountain, far from the village. The star was twinkling brightly, something that he couldn't do back in the city. Tsukasa traced many constellations, rambling about the myth behind them. And Rui listened to him. He knew that Tsukasa loves when people listen to him and Rui loves how animated Tsukasa is when talking. Everything about Tsukasa is so adorable and lovable for Rui. Through the days, Rui grew more and more in love with Tsukasa. Tsukasa someone made Rui's days brighter. Or maybe he was hopelessly in love with the blond since the first sight.

Rui noticed Tsukasa blow his palm, rubbing them together. "Are you cold?" he asked.

Tsukasa nodded. "It's a bit chilly tonight."

A cheeky idea popped in his head. Rui put an arm around Tsukasa and pulled him closer. Tsukasa let out a squeak. "Eek! Rui!"

"It won't be that cold if we share body heat~"

"Th-That's true...But still!"

"Are you shy?" "I can see you blushing."

"How can you? It's dark!"

"Aw, Tsukasa is so easy to tease~"

——————————————————————————————

Before Rui even opened the door, a loud crash. "Whoa!"

Rui ran into the library, seeing Tsukasa on the ground surrounded by fallen books. "Tsukasa!" he shouted, kneeling next to him to look for injuries. "Are you alright? Does it hurt?"

"I'm fine." Tsukasa waved it with a laugh. "Wow, that's embarrassing."

Rui sighed in relief. "What are you even doing?"

"Rearranging some book." Tsukasa gestured around and Rui noticed some stacked books in some places and more empty space. "New year, new looks, after all. Mama also ordered some new collections, so I'm finding space for them."

"I see. I can help around."

"You're not busy with your farm?"

"I've done my chores for the day, so I'm free."

"Well, I don't mind some extra hand." Tsukasa shrugged with a smile. "Okay then. Let's work together."

They spent the entire afternoon rearranging and noting the books. It was less stressful than back when his farm was still a mess. But Tsukasa was there to help, so it was only natural for Rui to help back. Besides, he could spend more time with Tsukasa. So, it was a win for him as well.

It was then he found a very old book, almost like a scrapbook with its cover filled with stickers.

"Hey, Tsukasa," Rui called. Tsukasa answered with a hum.  Rui lifted the scrapbook. "What is this?"

Tsukasa looked at it and his eyes widened. "Oh!" He ran toward Rui and took the book gently. "Oh, wow. This is so old. I almost forgot that I have this." There was a gentle nostalgic smile on his face as he flipped the pages with the utmost care. "It has been a long time since I read this. Ah, this brings back so many memories."

The feeling returned. And it was as if blaring in his head. "Tell me more."

"Well, it is kinda blurry," Tsukasa smiled slipped a little. Rui knew that Tsukasa always felt down when he could remember anything. At that moment, Rui understood the feeling. "But I think I used to have this one friend. We played a lot, mostly about superheroes and fairy tales. This book is one of the stories from our play date. They gave it to me before they left."

Oh.

"Here."

"Huh?"

"Keep it."

"But it's your book."

"I want you to keep it. Next time I visit, we can write a new book. So, keep it safe, okay?"

"Alright! You can count on me!"

Oh...

"That book..." Rui started, testing the water. "Is it about... Pegasus the Shinning?"

Tsukasa frowned as he turned to him. "Yeah...How did you know?"

Rui took a deep breath before saying, "Because I think I wrote that book."

"You..." A gasp escaped his lips as his eyes widened in shock. "Wait... No way..." Rui stepped forward, taking Tsukasa's hand before the book could slip. "You... You're the..."

Rui sighed, eyes feeling teary. "I am."

Tsukasa's breath quickened. He leaped into Rui's arms, hugging him tight. Rui hugged back, feeling the young man trembling. "You're the kid...You're back."

Rui nodded. "I'm back."

"I can't believe I forgot! I'm sorry!"

"It's okay. To be honest, I can't remember the detail as well. I'm glad you still keep the book."

"There's no way I can throw it away. You wrote it for us." Tsukasa pulled back, eyes glistening with tears but his gentle smile never flattered. "Hey, can we read it? For old time's sake."

Rui nodded. "Of course."

They spent the rest of the hours reminiscing about the past.

——————————————————————————————

Rui almost wanted to run away, but he knew he had to do it. He couldn't delay it any longer. So, he forced himself to walk into his library with his face so red and swallowing his nervousness.

Tsukasa looked up to Rui from his documentation. "Hi there, Rui."

"Hi." Rui winched when his voice pitched up too slightly high.

Tsukasa frowned as he stood up. "Is there something wrong? You look tense."

Don't run away. Don't run away. Come on, Rui. Where's your confidence? "Tsukasa, I..." he gulped. "I need to tell you something."

"Okay?"

Rui huffed, steeling himself. "Tsukasa...I..." Tsukasa's eyes widened, but Rui was already going loose. "I love you more than anything else." "I love everything about you; your smile, your bright personality, the way your ramble about your interest, everything. I cherish everything and want to see more from you. For the rest of my life, I want to be with you and be there for you. So..."

Taking a few seconds of calm to breathe, Rui knelt down, taking a single glittering blue feather. "Tsukasa Tenma. Will you marry me?"

Tsukasa stood with his mouth fully agape. His cheeks flushed and the corner of his eyes welled up with tears. "Yes!" Tsukasa shouted, jumping into Rui, causing both of them to fall. "Yes! Yes! I will marry you!"

Rui hugged him back, happiness overflowing his heart. Tsukasa pulled back a little and Rui tucked the blue feather behind Tsukasa's ear. Rui cupped Tsukasa's cheek and they shared a gentle kiss.

——————————————————————————————

On one gloomy summer day in Rui's childhood, he went home after spending time at his grandpa's farm, leaving a childhood friend behind.

On one bright summer day in Rui's adulthood, he returned to his grandpa's farm, reuniting with his childhood friend-turned-husband.

[11thsdoctress]

I seen that you been asking for request for writing and I can't get out of my mind the idea of a one shot based of snap out of it by the artic monkeys. Where the doctor (ideally 10th but I don't really mind if you use any other) had a relationship with the reader in the past and they meet before a long time and reader is gonna get married and the doctor try to stop them. Sorry if was too long of request and thank you in advance! ✨

oK SO IT TOOK ME A WHILE TO WRITE THIS,,,, bUT,, I LOVE THE PLOT I WANNA TAKE TIME AND DO IT JUSTICE,, I wanted to stick with the prompt to it's exact originally, but I just went on and branched out tbh,,, I hope I did a decent job (after all I wrote this with one braincell) also,,, I love Ten (and David Tennant in general),, I've been meaning to write something with/about him,, he's sooo adorkable :(( ========================

Just Like Old Times (10th/Tenth Doctor x Reader)

Fandom: Doctor Who

Ship: 10th/Tenth Doctor x Reader

Warnings: n/a Word Count: 2276

It was a fickle feeling, knowing that the both of you had something going on, even though you knew the Doctor for just a few years, it felt like he was a childhood friend for more than a decade or two. 

Now your world was back to its normal, dull, and mundane manners, leaving the TARDIS was the hardest decision you’ve made in your life, but who could blame you? Not even the Doctor could blame you for a time of some normalcy. 

A few years had gone by, you met a man, and suddenly everything happened so quickly, from the first few small dates to outings, to him proposing, to which you said yes, After all, you were in love with him, right? Or the idea that he reminds you of the Doctor? Are you really in love with the man that you call the love of your life? Or was it just an infatuation?

You try to shake your head away from these thoughts since it was the day of the wedding ceremony, it was still really early, the sun barely touching the horizon, and the bridesmaids were still fast asleep, you decided to take a head start in preparing for your big day, you pass by your wedding dress on the mannequin, a nice white gown, with some blue accents to compliment with the dress, you took a moment to try to process the moment, but you went ahead to prepare.

—------

*whirring, buzzes, beep-boops, whoooosh-*

It was one of those nights when the Doctor reminisces about the two of you, he always had a feeling that something was missing every time he woke up, and starts a new adventure, hell, even sometimes see you in his peripheral, only to be his imagination playing with his brain and hearts, 

The moment you walked out of the TARDIS was extremely difficult for the Doctor to move on from, He tried to forget everything for a bit, but it was no use, all he could think about was that it was his fault that you had left him with his time-traveling box, 

He had blamed himself that he had put you at a distance, blamed himself that he knew that he was afraid for you to get closer to him, not only of putting you in danger, but afraid to allow himself to express how much he loves and adores you in all the ways he could imagine.

“Oi! Spaceman, where are you heading off to this time?” Donna had pulled him back to reality as she looked a bit worried before grabbing the keys to her home.

“Oh it’s nothing, just thinking of visiting some old friends.” he put on a smile before saying his goodbyes to Donna and heading back to the TARDIS’ console and sighing,

“Maybe I do need to relax.” he looks at the monitor, and his reflection on the monitor, “Alright, let’s pick this date then.”

*whirring, buzzes, beep-boops, whoooosh-*

The TARDIS had landed on in a sunny morning in London, next to a beautifully decorated garden, the door swung open, The Doctor cheerfully opened the door and looked around the place, he smiled bitterly as he recognized the familiar garden, stepping out and started to empty out his mind from the adventures.

He had wandered off in to the garden, the sights and scents of roses, orchids, and lavenders had filled him, bringing back all the memories of him and you in this very place, the time you had brought him ice cream from your favorite parlor, the time he had read you a book while having a picnic, and the countless times of afternoon to night strolls.

All of these bittersweet memories flooding his head filled his hearts with the familiar flutter and heaviness of the guilt that was lingering with him for a while, it was a momentary bittersweet bliss he felt until he saw a signage,

“Mr. & Mrs. Wellington Wedding Ceremony”

Intrigued and curious, The Doctor went around to sneak in and to look who were the lucky couple. Spotting the groom, he just mumbled to himself, “eh, could’ve been worse.” before trying to find out who was the lucky bride,

The Doctor snooped around more to satisfy his curious brain, as he got to a photo album of the couple, he slightly regretted feeding his curiosity by finding the album to see you in the photos.

He felt that the world around him froze, he didn’t want to believe the thing he was seeing, he looks around him, before running to the back of the venue. His hearts were racing as he was trying to calm down, He wanted to deny that he saw you in those photos, he was trying his very best to get you off of his mind.

He wandered around until he reached the park, little ways down the road, not that far from the wedding, settling on the bench near the river, he was trying to convince himself that you were happy with someone else, but there was a nagging feeling in him that he has to do something. It was truly an internal battle, his mind was now wandering into endless, ‘What if’s’ and hypotheticals, until he was interrupted by a voice he tried to forget and  at the same time, longed to hear,

“Doctor?” 

—------

The wedding was a disaster,

James, your supposed soon to be husband, was delaying the wedding hour by hour, since his business was on the edge of a international deal to make them skyrocket in the stocks. You felt stupid to let him tend to his business instead of pushing through with the wedding, and honestly now it felt like the wedding ceremony was skipped entirely.

You tried to keep yourself together, convincing yourself that it was better for the both of them, since, at least it’s going to help the both of you in the finances in the future, but hell, you couldn’t even live and experience the wedding ceremony itself. There was this feeling that bothered you, and to take a breather, you headed to the back of the venue to calm your nerves, to prevent yourself from snapping at the disaster.

As you slowly inhaled and exhaled, to lower the tension and stress of the situation, there was a figure at the corner of your eye, walking to the bench you once had great memories with a memory, the more you looked and analyzed the figure, you were in disbelief when you saw the familiar brown suit and the messy hair, you had to make sure in what you saw was not a hallucination, you were frozen there, you couldn’t believe it, he was there. The Doctor was there.

You had debated with yourself, thinking on which was going to be your next move, let him be or approach him, 

Taking a gulp, you slowly approached the bench, mustering up all the courage you needed before letting out,

“Doctor?”

It felt that time had stopped, it was surreal for the both of you, for you, you’d never thought that you would say that word or name ever again, 

For him, he’d thought he would never hear that voice calling for him ever again,

He quickly turned around, stumbled a bit as he was trying to come up with something to say, 

“I-It’s been a while, huh?” you look down, “would’ve sent you an invite, but didn’t know how to…” You awkwardly say, just to avoid the the silence,

There was a pause, an unbearing one, before the both of you say at the same time,

“I’m sorry!”

Both of you were surprised on how the apologies came out at the same time,

“I should be the one saying sorry here.” The Doctor went a bit closer as he looked at you, “I was the one that was scared to say anything-” 

“No, I should be the one apologizing since I was the one that walked away on what we could’ve fixed!” You insist as you looked at him, 

“Seems like both of us have things to say sorry for.” He says, trying to make the atmosphere less intimidating,

As it became more comfortable and exchanging jokes and banter, the both of you sat on the bench next to the river, asking questions just to catch up, everything was easy going and breezy,

“Never thought I would land on your wedding day.” he says as he sighs, trying to hide the bitter thoughts that accompany with it,

Never thought I’d see you again after what I did.” You look away, regretting the harshness of the reply,

“Wouldn’t blame you.” There was a while of comfortable silence before the Doctor had to ask the question that was in his mind for a while,

“Do you still love me? Or do you resent me for everything?” He asked as his voice had a hint of sadness and nervousness as he was trying to brace for your answer,

“Doctor, I could never hate or resent you, honestly, for a while, I resented myself for walking out, not doing anything to get to you, or at the least-” you sigh, “said yes to this.” gesturing to the white gown you were wearing, “but I can’t do anything about it, can I?” 

“Then how were you so sure that this type of forever suits you?” He suddenly asked,

“What do you mean?” You looked at him, 

“Well, you’re questioning a major choice that affects your life, why did you say yes to this?” 

You thought about his question, it was something you really had to ponder, realizing alot of things, you met your soon to be husband at your lowest time, and he very much acted like the Doctor,

The more you thought about the reasons, the more you realized that you were still very much in love with the Doctor subconsciously. Slowly by slowly, you were regretting the choices you had made ever since walking out of the TARDIS, 

The Doctor suddenly pulls you in an embrace, noting your habit of spacing out and shaking, as soon as you realized what he was doing, you snapped out of the state of overthinking and calmed down, “I can’t just back out of this, I have to push through with this, I signed up for this, I have to take that…” 

“You can.” 

“No I can’t.”

The Doctor was about to say something, until you heard your soon to be husband calling to you, “Baby, what are you doing with this guy?” He harshly grabs your wrist, causing you to whimper,

“What the hell you think you’re doing? Treating her like that?” The Doctor was not happy with that.

“So? She belongs to me.” He plainly and arrogantly says as he was dragging you away from the Doctor’s comfort,

You could feel the anger piling in the Doctor as he was trying his best not to punch this guy, “I’d be careful if I were you.”

He pushes you in his car, “As if.” He gets in the car and it speeds off, You were hopeless, you were comfortable and honest for once in a while. As the car was speeding off, it was the uncomfortable silence that stressed you out the most, James was about to say something but the driver of the car interrupted, “Is that a flying blue box?”

You looked through the window behind you, seeing the familiar TARDIS, you had hope in you for once,

James notices the flying blue box behind the car as well, “What the hell is that?!” 

The doors of the TARDIS opened as The Doctor was now in sight with his sonic screwdriver in hand, he points it to the car door on your side. Noticing the plan, you were about to jump out of the 120mph car and into the blue box, but you felt a grip on your wrist,

“You’re not going anywhere.” James angrily says, The blue box is now next to the car, matching the speed, 

“Yes I am!” You punched him square in the face,

As he winced in pain, he lets you go, in the window of opportunity, you hurriedly made an effort to grab the Doctor’s arm and jump to the TARDIS, in which you ended up landing on top of him and the doors shutting,

As the TARDIS flew up and into space, both of you took a moment to catch your breaths before both of you broke into laughter,

“I miss this!” you exclaimed as you both sat up,

“I miss you.” He says as his laugh turns into a smile,

You blushed at his sudden confession, not really expecting that he would still feel that way towards you, however, you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t feel the same way.

“I miss you too.” you say as you leaned your forehead against his, a usual thing that the both of you did, The Doctor’s smile grew wider and his hearts beat faster after hearing you say that,

He slowly held your face and leaned in closer for a kiss, and it felt that he was longing for this moment for a while, it lasted for a few minutes before he scooped you up, carrying you bridal style, as if he was the one you married.

“The next time I see you in a wedding gown, I better be the groom.” He says, making the both of you laugh as he carries you towards the TARDIS’ halls towards his bedroom, after all, the two of you needed to rest before going on more adventures, just like old times.

======== author's note: aaaaaaaaaaaaa I hope to write more since I really love doing this, and ofc requests are open, wait for announcements for it hdksjksdjfhkdsj hope ya'll enjoyed this-

[rainisawriter]

Sick for You (Ryu) {Sicktember 2023}

━━━━━━༻☔༺━━━━━━

Genre: Fluff, slice of life, angst, comfort, domestic, comedy, romance

Word Count: 8,564

Pairing: First Person x Ryu

World: The Rampage

A/N: Okay, let me say that this is 100 million percent self-indulgent because I am a certified Ryu simp. I would die for this man, okay. This also took like a week to write lmao and it was written for @sicktember 2023. I wasn’t originally gonna do anything for this because of Flufftober but then this idea hit me like a freight train c: Also shout out to Kels (@babyboybinbin), Dia (@sieunkinnie) and Sweet (@xsweetelegantdisasterx) for letting me abuse them in this fic~ I regret nothing ò.ó)

Prompts (in order): #11 -Beginner’s Guide to Faking Sick / #18 – “Wear your coat, you’ll catch a cold.” / #4 – Hiding An Illness / Alt #3 – Pounding Headache / #23 – Coughing Fit / #16 – Consulting the Internet/Web MD / #19 – Curled Up With A Pet / #8 – Persistent Fever / Alt #4 – Forehead Kisses / #12 – Home Remedy/Old Wives Tale / #21 – “But if you stay, you’ll get sick too.” / #24 – “Did you just sneeze?” / #3 – “What happened to your phenomenal immune system?” / Alt #1 – “I could really use a hug right about now.”

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Light streamed through the curtains, landing conveniently across my eyes and bringing me from my sleep. I looked at the clock through blurry eyes, realizing that I needed to get up soon for work but I really didn’t want to. My bed was so comfy and the body wrapped around my own was warm. Why would I ever want to –

Wait a damn minute… I blinked dumbly at the wall for a moment. Why is there a body in my bed? I turned slowly so as not to disturb them, a smile instantly coming to my face when I realized who it was.

Ryu was sleeping peacefully behind me, strands of hair falling across his face. He was already a gorgeous man but he looked like a damn angel when he was sleeping so peacefully. I slowly reached forward, tucking the hair behind his ear. He stirred, gorgeous brown eyes meeting mine.

“Morning,” he mumbled, stretching out his long body.

“When did you get here?” I wondered, propping my cheek up against my hand. “I thought you were on tour for another three days.”

“We had to end it early because of the bad weather.”

“You shoulda woke me up.”

He hummed, fingers curling around the hem of my shirt. “You looked too cute. I didn’t want to bother you.”

I ignore the fluttering of my heart and the warming of my cheeks, leaning down to claim his lips. “Babe, you could never bother me.”

He gave me a goofy grin, eyes lighting up. “You have to be at work soon, right?”

All thoughts of work had gone out the window when I realized he was in bed with me. I rarely got to see him because of his hectic schedule and there was no way I was going to work. 

I forced myself up, grabbing my phone off the bedside table and bringing up Google. Ryu propped himself up on his elbow, looking curiously at my phone screen.

His brow furrowed as he read the words of the article I had clicked on. “‘A beginners guide to faking sick.’ You’re gonna lie to your boss?”

“No… I’m just gonna bend the truth a little,” I defended, trying to ignore the stern look he sent me. “Is it so wrong to want to spend time with my beautiful boyfriend, hm?”

He fought back against the smile trying to overtake his lips, still trying to appear stern but I knew I had broken him. It was my special ability at this point. “Fine, but you have to make it up to him later, okay?”

“I’ll bring him donuts or something.”

Ryu laughed, shaking his head before climbing over me to get off the bed. He started to leave the room but paused as if unsure. “Do you want me to make you breakfast?”

I wasn’t sure why, but he was always cautious when it came to cooking. It’s like he wants to, but he just doesn’t have the confidence in himself which breaks my heart. I offered him a playful grin. “Well, the last time I cooked something that wasn’t instant ramen, I set the kitchen on fire, so…”

He paled as the memory came flooding back to him. “Ah… I’ll cook, then.”

“Sounds like a good idea.” I followed him into the tiny kitchen, settling down at the table with my phone. “I love your cooking. Your food always tastes so good.”

“Really?” He glanced at me with a shy smile and I nodded.

“Yes, really. If I could cook like you, I wouldn’t be a Fire hazard.”

He laughed, pulling the eggs out of the fridge. “Just don’t attempt it when I’m not here, okay?”

“Okay~” I promised, pulling up my boss’s contact. I took a deep breath, clearing my throat as I pressed it to my ear. I hoped it would go to his voice-mail, but no such luck. 

“Hello? Takanori speaking.“

“Hey, boss.” I tried to lower my voice and sound as if I was dying, but judging from the look Ryu was giving me, it wasn’t working as intended. “I, uh… I can’t come in… today…”

“Oh? Are you okay? You sound terrible.“

“Yeah, I -” I faked a few coughs and Ryu sent me another stern look, clearly not approving of the lie. “- I’m not feeling too hot.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. Get some rest and –“

There was a sudden loud clang from the kitchen. Ryu had dropped the metal spatula on the floor. ‘Sorry,’ he mouthed, sending me an apologetic and guilty look.

My boss called out my name, sounding worried. “What was that noise? Is everything okay?“

“Yeah!” I replied quickly, forgetting my tone change which I quickly fixed. “Yeah, sorry. I… I dropped my cup…”

“You should be in bed,” he scolded softly. “Don’t worry about anything. I can get Dia to cover your shift.“

“Thanks, boss.”

“Take care.”

I hung up the phone, releasing a relieved sigh as I sat back in my chair. “Man, acting is hard. I don’t know how you do it.”

“A lot of practice,” he hummed, breaking the eggs into a bowl. 

I watched him for a moment, admiring how careful he was with each action. “What should we do today? A new store opened up a few blocks away. Looks interesting from the outside.”

“Is that a smart idea? What if your boss sees you?”

“He works in an office building on the other side of town and he’s a workaholic so he stays way later than everyone else. The chance of him seeing me is,” I formed a circle with my hand. “Zero percent.”

“Famous last words,” he teased.

“For you,” I came up behind him, arms around his waist and face buried in the back of his shirt. “It’s worth the risk.”

His hand found mine, giving it a gentle squeeze. It was something he did to show thanks when words failed him.

After breakfast, we started to get ready to head out.

Ryu checked his phone before glancing at me. “It’s supposed to rain and the temperature is going to drop. Wear your coat, you’ll catch a cold.”

“Don’t worry so much, you know I love the cold,” I replied, shoving my feet into my boots.

“Loving the cold doesn’t make you immune to it.”

“I’ll be fine, I promise.” I held my hand out to him with a reassuring smile and he reluctantly took it, his hand easily dwarfing my own. “Besides, I’ve got you to keep me warm.”

He quickly turned his head but not before I noticed his blush, bringing a grin to my lips. He tugged me out of the apartment, the chilly autumn air nipping at my exposed skin. The sky was covered with gray clouds,  thunder rolling softly in the distance. 

He glanced up and hummed thoughtfully. “We should buy an umbrella first.”

“The convenience store on the corner sells them, I think.” I tugged him in that direction, feeling in high spirits. How could I not be? The love of my life was home, it was nearly October, it was cold out and it was probably going to rain. It was a recipe for pure joy.

The store had an entire rack of umbrellas for sale, including a blue one with lamas printed on it and a teal one with cats printed on it. It took me an embarrassingly long time to choose one while Ryu waited patiently, standing behind me with his arms around my waist and chin on top of my head. It was an easy feat given our height difference.

“If you want, you can buy both,” suggested Ryu softly.

I considered it for a moment. “They’re overpriced already and I don’t need two.”

Ryu chuckled, picking them both up and heading to the front despite my protests. He didn’t hesitate to pay for them both, again, ignoring my protests. I sent him a disapproving look when he held them out to me.

“Don’t be mad,” he pouted. “I like buying things for you. It makes me happy.”

Well, I can’t argue with that. His happiness is my happiness. I clicked my tongue, taking the umbrellas from him. “Thank you, I really do appreciate it.”

“Of course. Should we check out that new store now?”

“Yes, let’s go~!” I grabbed his hand and dragged him from the store, prompting a laugh from him.

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I stifled a yawn, rubbing the back of my neck. We had been out for hours, mostly just walking around and enjoying each other’s company. The shop hadn’t been anything special, though Ryu did find a jacket that he liked.

He threw his arm around my shoulders, rubbing up and down my arm. “Should we head home?”

“Yeah. We can watch a movie if you want.”

“I’d like that. You can choose.”

“Oh?” I sent him a grin and he frowned.

“Am I going to regret that decision?”

“We are so watching The Worst.”

A faint tint came to his cheeks. “We’ve already seen it a hundred times.”

“And I wanna see it a hundred more because my baby is in it and he’s incredibly talented.” I smiled warmly, reaching up to cup his face. He leaned down to make it easier, his warm hand covering my own. “You’re an amazing actor, you know? And an amazing dancer. And a genuinely amazing person in general.”

He shifted nervously, glancing away. 

I knew complimenting him made him feel shy and nervous, but it felt important to me. I needed him to know how important he is, how special. Maybe that makes me selfish, I don’t know. 

I pulled back, releasing my grip on him. “Come on, let’s get home before -“

As if sensing my thoughts, the sky opened up with a loud roar of thunder. Sheets of rain fell on top of us, causing the others on the street to cry out and rush for cover. Ryu grabbed my hand, pulling me under the cover of a nearby Cafe. As badly as I wanted to enjoy the rain, I was more concerned about him. It would be bad if he got sick and couldn’t rejoin the other Rampage members.

“We should get home so you can change,” I murmured, frowning at the water that clung to his hair. I opened the cat umbrella, making sure to hold it high enough so it wasn’t resting against the top of his head.

“You need to change, too,” he pointed out, putting his arm around my shoulder and tugging me against his side to ensure that the umbrella covered us both. The wind picked up, sending a chill down my spine. It took everything I had not to shiver simply because I didn’t want to worry him.

The apartment was chilly, providing little warmth.

“Hurry and get changed,” said Ryu as he shrugged off his jacket.

“You first.”

He sent me a pointed look which I returned. 

“Don’t look at me like that, Ryutaro. Think about the other members if you get sick.” I folded my arms over my chest, watching as he bit his lip. “Go on, I’ll be fine.”

“I’ll be quick.” He pecked my cheek before rushing into the bedroom. Kazu came rushing out when he opened the door, easily slipping through his legs before rushing over to me.

I clicked my tongue, kneeling in front of him. “Sorry, I didn’t realize you were in the room.”

He stared at me with his large blue eyes, tail swishing back and forth in annoyance.

“Will a treat make it up to you?”

Mrow~

I chuckled, patting the feline on the head before standing up to enter the kitchen, him hot on my heels. He hopped up onto the chair, waiting patiently as I searched for the treats. Where the hell are they? I tugged open the cabinet, spying them on the top shelf.

Well, shit. I stood on my tiptoes, reaching up but only the tips of my fingers brushed against the plastic container. I tried pushing it closer to the edge but I think I just pushed it farther away.

A chest pressed against my back, his hand appearing beside my own and easily reaching the container. “I’ll feed Kazu. Go get changed.” He pressed another kiss to my cheek before approaching the annoyed feline.

I smiled at him before doing as I was told, changing into a t-shirt, a rampage hoodie, and some pajama pants with little ghosts printed on them. I felt much warmer now, but there was a tickle at the back of my brain. I couldn’t describe it, I just knew I didn’t feel quite as energetic as I had this morning. Then again, it was a long day.

Ryu was sitting on the couch waiting for me, Kazu curled up beside him as he gently brushed his fingers over the feline’s white fur. I settled down on his other side, seeing the movie already pulled up and ready to play. He pulled me against his body, arms wrapped protectively around me.

With a smile, I pressed play on the remote before letting myself melt against him, chest filled with warmth and love.

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Over the next couple of days, I started to feel worse and worse. My body felt heavy as if it were made of lead, someone seemed to be endlessly pounding on my skull with a hammer and I barely had the energy to live. Even so, I knew I had to hide it from Ryu because he’s the type who would drop everything for his loved ones.

I refuse to be the reason behind him getting into trouble or, worse, getting fired and losing his dreams. It was hard as hell to pretend to be okay, but I managed by pretending it was a video game. Besides, he leaves tomorrow morning so I can die in peace without disturbing him so long as I make it through the night.

The smell of paella filled the apartment and I swallowed hard, hit by a wave of nausea. Not that it smelled bad or anything, but in my weakened state, I simply wasn’t hungry and I couldn’t trust myself not to throw up if I actually ate something. If that were to happen, Ryu would blame himself for messing it up and I didn’t want that.

On the other hand, telling him I didn’t want to eat would probably make him feel self-conscious and sad. He put in the effort to cook for us despite not having a lot of confidence in doing so, I couldn’t just crush him like that.

I brought my knees to my chest, groaning softly into my knees. Kazu was staring at me from the recliner. I don’t know if he understood my predicament but it felt as if he was judging me for my choices, the little shit. He reminds me of someone else who just so happens to share the same name.

Ryu’s feet padded softly across the wooden floor as he appeared beside the couch. “Dinner’s ready. Do you want me to make you a plate?”

I took a slow, deep breath. ‘Come on, get your shit together. Do it for him.’ Lifting my head, I gave him an apologetic smile. “Actually… I think I might skip dinner tonight.”

He sat beside me with a frown, brow furrowed in worry. “Why? What’s wrong?”

My stomach lurched, a sharp pain shooting through my skull simultaneously and I nearly cursed aloud at my body for conspiring against me. I wrapped my arms tightly around my stomach to try and ease some of the pain I felt. “I’m about to start my period so my stomach is a bit… wonky at the moment.”

“Already? You’re not due to start for another week.”

I shouldn’t have been surprised that he knew that because he was always on top of things like that, always trying to ensure I was comfortable and prepared each month, even when he was away. “Uh… better early than late?”

His face burned at the comment and he brought the back of his hand up to cover it. “Go get some rest.”

“I’m sorry, Ryu.”

“For what?”

“You cooked for nothing… I should have said something sooner.”

“It’s okay,” he replied softly, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “You can eat it when you’re feeling better.”

I wanted to kiss him so badly for being such a sweetheart but I didn’t want him to get sick so I settled for a thankful smile. “Thank you, baby.”

“Of course.”

I waited for him to disappear back into the kitchen before standing up and hobbling my way back to the bedroom, holding onto the wall for support. The room was spinning by the time I made it to bed and I was all too happy to fall face-first onto it, the pillow muffling my groan.

Despite feeling exhausted, I just couldn’t fall asleep. My head was hurting too bad, the painkillers not even touching it. For two hours, I lay there staring at the wall, trying to will myself to succumb to the darkness of sleep but my body refused to obey. When Ryu finally joined me, I pretended I was asleep, urging myself not to move as he slid in behind me, arms wrapped protectively around my body.

I guess that was the missing link because the last thing I remember was him kissing me on the cheek and whispering, I love you, something that he rarely said out loud. 

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I startled awake as a coughing fit grasped me tightly, forcing me to sit up. The room was bright with Ryu nowhere to be found. I glanced at the clock and cursed, realizing that he had already left. I was already late for work, too.

As badly as I wanted to just bail and call in sick again, I knew I couldn’t. This was my karma for lying about being sick in the first place, I knew. With a groan, I threw the covers off of me and immediately started to shiver as the cool air wrapped around me. My head still hurt, my nose stuffy and the room spun when I tried to stand up.

“Shit,” I muttered, sitting back down and squeezing my eyes shut. I waited for my head to stop swimming before standing up again, walking slowly so I didn’t fall. Kazu followed close behind, his big eyes not leaving me once. At least he didn’t seem to be judging me this time. If anything, he looked worried. 

“I’m fine,” I told him, though my voice was hoarse and my throat scratchy. He flicked his ear, eyes narrowing. “Don’t give me that look. I’ll never give you treats again, you little -” My threat was interrupted by a coughing fit, my throat burning.

It took longer than I’d like to admit to get ready for work and, if I’m being completely honest, I don’t remember how I got to work. It felt like I blacked out and when I came to, I was sitting at my desk with a sheet of paper in one hand and a pen in the other.

I felt a familiar tickle at my nose and I scrunched it up on instinct, only making it worse. I tried to hold it back but a loud sneeze ripped from my body, sending the stack of papers flying off the desk. I groaned at the throbbing in my skull, eyes half-lidded. 

“Are you okay?” A hand rested on my shoulder and I slowly lifted my head, seeing my boss frown. “Geez, you look like death.”

“Am okay, boss,” I mumbled, rubbing my eyes. I started to get up to retrieve the papers when the world started to spin violently around me.

“Woah!” He threw his arm out to steady me, slowly lowering me back into my seat. The back of his hand rested against my forehead, his frown deepening. “You’re burning up… wait here a minute, okay?”

I didn’t have the energy to reply, my body slumping forward onto the desk with a groan. Why does everything hurt so bad? Am I dying right now?

“As you can see, she’s not doing so well,” stated my boss as he adjusted his glasses, returning to my side. “Can you take her home? I’ll pay for the Uber.”

“Of course, boss,” replied Dia. “Leave it to me.”

“I’ll call them, then.”

As soon as the car arrived, Dia helped me down to the first floor, allowing me to lean against her even at the risk of catching my cold. At least, I think it’s a cold. Maybe it’s the flu, I don’t know. Either way, she was selfless and I loved her for it.

There was a car parked in front of the building, tinted windows making it impossible to see. I could hear K-pop music blaring from within and I dreaded getting inside with my head hurting as badly as it was.

Dia knocked on the passenger window and it slowly slid down, the driver leaning toward it. She was wearing a strange pink thing on her head, the fabric secured beneath her chin with velcro. On the top was something resembling a tentacle, though it was different. I felt as if I knew what it was, but my feverish brain couldn’t quite place it.

She tilted her head down to peer at us over her sunglasses, yelling to be heard over the loud music pumping through the car. “You Dia?”

“I can’t hear you!” She yelled back.

Shaking her head, the driver flicked the volume dial and repeated the question. 

“Yes, that’s me.”

“Cool, I’m Kelso. Hop in and let’s go for a ride,” she grinned, rubbing her hands together like some kind of anime villain.

Dia sent me a concerned look as she helped me into the backseat, though I wasn’t sure if it was because of my illness or because our driver might be certifiably insane. The cold air of the ac felt good against my heated skin and I sighed softly, resting my head against the glass.

The car was quiet at first, broken only by the soft music playing in the background.

“Hey, you know sharks don’t have any bones?”

“I – huh?” Dia looked at the woman, startled. 

“Yeah and don’t say their teeth, either, because that shit is calcium, not bone.”

“Sure…”

The song changed and Dia gasped. “Oh my god, I love Pentagon!”

“Really? Me too!” She grinned, turning in her seat so that she was half-facing us while still driving down the road. “Who’s your favorite member?”

Dia didn’t seem to notice that our driver was no longer looking at the road despite driving at such a high speed. “I love Jinho.”

“My bias is Wooseok.”

My wide eyes stared forward as cars and buildings zoomed past us. My heart was racing in my chest, and my head seeming to throb in tandem with it. I looked at Dia in horror, trying to get her attention but my voice seemed to have left me. When I turned back to the front, there was a woman relaxing on the hood, not seeming the least bit bothered by the high speed at which we were traveling.

She slowly turned her head, smiling warmly at me when our eyes met, but it quickly fell into a worried frown. “You don’t look so good, hun.” Despite being on the outside of the vehicle, it sounded as if she was talking from right in front of me.

“I…” My voice was scratchy and I ended up coughing a few times before I could speak again. “I think I’m dying…”

She chuckled softly, amusement dancing in her eyes. “You’re not dying. Not yet, anyway.”

“How are you on the hood of the car? How haven’t we crashed yet?” I glanced at Dia to find her still chatting animatedly with Kelso, but they weren’t making a sound. It was as if someone had pressed the mute button on them. “I’m so confused,” I groaned, resting my face in my hands. All I wanted was to be back in Ryu’s arms, but he would be gone for a while.

My heart clenched painfully at the thought, tears stinging at my eyes.

“Don’t cry,” said the woman, her voice soft and comforting. “Everything will be alright, I promise.”

Maybe she was right, but at that moment, it felt like everything was collapsing in on me. 

“Rest,” she ordered.

Warmth spread throughout my body, my eyes growing heavy. I shook my head, trying to keep them open but I wasn’t strong enough. Before I knew it, darkness had claimed me.

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I tugged the comforter tighter around my body, feeling as if I was freezing. It wasn’t even cold outside and the AC certainly wasn’t on, yet my body refused to warm up. What in the world is happening to me? I rarely get sick and it usually knocks me on my ass when I finally do but shit. It feels as if I’ve been sick for weeks, though I know it’s only been a few days.

I wasn’t feeling quite as bad as I had been yesterday, so that’s an improvement, I guess. I felt exhausted and barely got two hours of sleep last night, yet sleep seemed to be running away from me.

With a sigh, I rolled over so I could grab my phone off the bedside table. I was hoping to have a message from Ryu to lift my spirits, but he still hadn’t replied to my last message. I knew he was busy but, already feeling so shitty, it hit me harder than it should have.

I pulled up Google, contemplating my next action for a moment before deciding to search for my symptoms. If I knew exactly what I had whether that be the cold, the flu, or something else entirely, then I could take the proper medication and finally recover from this shit. Regular cold meds and painkillers don’t seem to be cutting it.

After inputting all of my symptoms and the time frame into Google, I skimmed through most of the results because my head was still hurting and my vision slightly blurry, but most of the links I clicked all said the same shit – you’re probably going to die.

No fucking shit. Were all gonna die eventually. I groaned in frustration, throwing my phone onto the bedside table. As if disturbed by the sudden noise, Kazu came running into the room, tail straight up in alert.

“I’m still alive,” I grunted. “Barely.”

“Mrow~” He jumped up onto the bed, looking at me expectantly. 

“What?”

“Mrow~“

“I don’t speak cat.”

He blinked at me and I blinked back. After staring at each other for several minutes, he hopped up onto the bed, flopping down against my side. I slowly turned, throwing my arms around him in an attempt to cuddle. I figured he was going to run away because Ryu was the only one who could get away with cuddling him.

He didn’t, though, allowing me to hold him against my chest. I buried my face in his soft fur, wishing that I would stop feeling like the damn walking dead. More than anything, I wished Ryu was here. Maybe I was being clingy but I missed him something terrible, my heart aching.

I heard the front door open, Kazu’s ear flicking to indicate that he heard it, too. Dia appeared at the door of my bedroom a minute later. “Morning. Feeling any better?”

“If by better you mean death then yes.”

She frowned, touching my forehead with her hand. “That fever is being really persistent… I think you should go to the doctor.”

“Doctors are expensive,” I muttered. 

“You’re dating a celebrity, I think you can afford to see a doctor when you’re sick.”

I shook my head, frowning at her. “It’s his money, not mine.”

“You’re supposed to share things in a relationship.”

“Don’t care. I refuse to use his money. Besides, if I ignore it long enough, it’ll give up and go away.”

She sighed deeply, bringing her hand to her face. “Are you hungry?”

My stomach twisted painfully at the thought of food, my nose wrinkling. “No.”

“You have to eat if you want to get better, you know.”

“I ate last night.”

“Half a slice of bed is hardly nutritious.”

“I’m fine, mom.”

“I’m just worried about you,” she frowned. “Have you even told Ryu-san?”

“Of course not!” I replied quickly, scowling at her. “And I’m not going to. As far as he’s concerned, this never happened.”

“Don’t you think he’d want to know?” 

“Of course, he would, but I know him. He’ll obsess over it and worry himself into the ground. He needs to focus on his group, not me. There’s nothing he can do for me so there’s no point telling him.”

She clearly didn’t agree, making me narrow my eyes at her.

“If you tell him, I will steal all your K-pop albums and sell them for one penny outside of Seiyu!”

She gasped dramatically, hands coming up to cover her mouth. “You wouldn’t dare…”

“Try me.”

“Fine,” Dia huffed, putting her hand on her hip. “Do you need anything before I head to work?”

“Can you get me a Dr. Pepper from the fridge?”

Without a word, she left the room, returning a minute later with a bottle of water.

“That’s not Dr. Pepper,” I scowled.

“You shouldn’t be drinking soda while you’re sick. Drink water so you hydrate, not diedrate.”

I scoffed in annoyance, knowing she was right but refusing to admit it.

She set the bottle on the nightstand, giving me a smile. “I’m off, then. Call me if you need me and get some rest. Don’t do anything stupid.”

I watched as she disappeared from the room, listening to the sound of her footsteps fading as she headed for the door. The hinges squeaked when she opened it, squeaking again when she closed it.

I don’t want to rest, I’ve been doing nothing but resting for ages and I’m starting to go stir crazy. I pressed a kiss to the top of Kazu’s head before slowly crawling out of bed, taking a moment to regain my sense of balance. “Kazu, don’t tell Dia.”

He tilted his head back, staring at me with narrowed eyes. I couldn’t tell if he was trying to say he disapproved of my actions or if he just didn’t give enough fucks to tell her even if he could talk.

After making sure Kazu had food in his bowl, I grabbed a Dr. Pepper from the fridge and curled up on the couch to watch some Netflix. I hoped it would distract me from everything or ease my stir craziness, at the very least. Kazu hopped up into the recliner, crossing one paw over the other before resting his head atop them, large blue eyes staring straight at me.

It was only slightly unnerving.

“I’m not just gonna, like, keel over and die ya know,” I scowled at him, earning just a blink in reply. I really wanted to watch The Worst again, but I knew it would only make me long for Ryu more so I chose a funny movie instead. Thank god Deadpool is available in Japan. It’s easily one of my comfort movies and I love Ryan Reynolds so much.

Man, I’d kill to be able to eat some popcorn right now, but the thought of it had my stomach doing painful flips. I scowled, patting my belly. “Relax, ho. I’m not gonna feed you so chill out.”

About halfway through the movie, I felt my eyelids growing heavier but I fought to stay awake. I was tired of sleeping, I just wanted to watch Deadpool and laugh my troubles away! I slapped my cheeks, shaking my head to try and wake myself up and it worked… for about twenty minutes.

Maybe if I just rest my eyes for a few minutes, it’ll help. Yeah, that’s right. I’m just… resting my eyes…

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The feeling of being lifted startled me awake, my eyes snapping open and my limbs flailing in panic.

“Calm down, it’s just me.”

I blinked dumbly, slowly lifting my gaze to meet Ryu’s. “You’re not supposed to be here… am I hallucinating again?”

“Again?” He frowned at me, his jaw tense. He didn’t say another word as he carried me to the bedroom, setting me gently down on the bed. “Do not get out of this bed.”

I frowned at him, not used to hearing him sound or look so annoyed. My eyes followed him until he was out of sight and I heard the front door open and close loudly, making me wince. Ryu was always so patient and kind, even when someone was trying to rile him up. He playfully gets mad with his members, but it’s nothing serious.

Seeing him act this way now… I knew I had fucked up royally. Tears stung at my eyes but I blinked them back, sniffling loudly as I reached for a tissue to blow my nose. God, I bet I look like an absolute mess.

I’ve always been self-conscious around him because he’s just so beautiful and I know I don’t deserve him, but my insecurities have, for the most part, stayed hidden in a dark corner of my mind. He made me feel loved and accepted, seeming to crush those negative thoughts every time they tried to crawl out into the light.

Now, though, I was completely overwhelmed. My body was at its limit and it was affecting my mind, as well. I felt weak and pathetic, like a burden on Ryu who had raced home to help me because I couldn’t help myself. Was he going to get into trouble for this? Would he lose his spot on The Rampage? 

He leaned against the doorframe, arms folded over his chest and jaw clenched. “Why didn’t you call me?”

“I didn’t want to bother you -“

“Bother me?” He echoed in disbelief. “Do you even consider me your boyfriend?”

“What? Of course, I -“

“You never tell me anything. You’re always hiding your feelings, hiding when you’re sick. Don’t you trust me?” He shook his head, brow furrowed in frustration. “Do you not want to be with me?”

The question was enough to finally break me and send tears rolling down my cheeks. He looked at me with a startled expression, body tense as he pushed away from the doorframe.

I quickly rolled over to face the wall, biting my lip to try and muffle my sobs. I tried so hard to stop crying but, as always, my body refused to obey.

The side of the bed dipped, his warm hand on my back. “Please don’t cry… I’m sorry.”

I was the one who fucked up but he is apologizing? Goddamn it.

“Hey,” he called softly, trying to roll me over to face him but I refused, shaking my head. Instead of forcing me, he slid in behind me until his warm chest was against my back, arms wrapped protectively around me. “It’s okay, darling. I’m right here.”

His words only made me cry harder, fists clenching around the sheets. I was a fucking mess and I hated showing this side of myself to him. He was patient with me, though, whispering comforting words to me and rubbing my arm to try and calm me down. It took a while, but I guess I finally ran out of tears.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, my voice hoarse and throat sore. My eyes felt puffy and there was a wet spot on my pillow from all the tears I had shed. “I… I should have told you, I just… I don’t want to, to ruin your career…”

“That won’t happen,” he assured me, trying to roll me toward him again. This time, I allowed it, not having the strength to fight back. His brown eyes met mine, swimming with love and warmth. He cupped my cheek, thumb brushing away the remnants of my tears. “I thought my heart stopped when Dia called me.”

“I told her not to,” I muttered, focusing my eyes on his necklace, unable to hold his gaze.

“I’m glad she did. You’ve been suffering alone for days,” he frowned, reaching down to press a kiss to my forehead. “You still have a fever.”

I pushed at his chest while simultaneously trying to sink into the mattress. “You’re going to get sick!”

He chuckled, taking my hand and pressing it over his heart. The steady beat was comforting. “I’m not leaving your side until you’re better.”

“But The Rampage -“

“Sends there get well soon wishes. I can’t promise Likiya-san and Zin-san won’t scold you when they see you next,” he smiled, pressing another kiss to my forehead before standing up. He started to leave the room but paused, sending me a stern look. “Don’t you dare move.”

While he was gone, I sat up to grab some tissues to wipe away my tears and blow my nose in an attempt to look a little less like a bog witch. I doubt it helped much, but he didn’t seem to care as he returned with my favorite Halloween mug, steam rising from it.

Ryu sat on the side of the bed, careful not to spill it. “Drink this, it’ll help.”

I tried to sniff the air but I couldn’t smell anything. I eyed it wearily. “What is it?”

“Ginger tea. My lola used to make it for me every time I got sick. She swears by it so she made sure to teach me how to make it.”

I was a picky eater, so trying new things always made me feel weary.  I trust Ryu, though, so I took the mug from him and gave it a careful sip. It filled my body with warmth, tasting slightly spicy. Not like chili pepper spicy but more like… herbal spicy.

“It’s good,” I murmured, closing my eyes as I drank more of it. My throat was already beginning to feel less scratchy and sore.

“I’m guessing you haven’t eaten, either?”

“Define eaten.”

He held back a sigh, running a hand through his hair to compose himself. “I’ll make you some Lugaw.”

“Lu what now?”

“Lugaw,” he repeated with a chuckle. “My lola always told me that it has healing properties and it always made me feel better as a kid. I… don’t know if I can make it correctly, but I’m going to try.”

“I bet it’s going to taste amazing,” I assured him, reaching out for his hand. “You’ll put Gordon Ramsay to shame.”

His cheeks tinted, a goofy smile on his lips, and his eyes lighting up. “Thank you. I’ll do my best.”

When he stood up, I tried to follow only for him to click his tongue.

“No, you need to rest.”

“I’ve done nothing but rest,” I scowled. “I want to watch you cook. It calms me.”

He seemed to consider it for a moment before nodding and holding out his hand to help me up. His arm remained around my body as we headed to the kitchen and he didn’t leave my side until I was safely on the chair. Watching him truly did make me feel calm, along with the beverage that I was drinking. 

I felt a tiny bit better already. Maybe his grandma is really onto something with these home remedies. “How long are you staying?”

He hummed as he cut up more ginger. “I told you, I’m not leaving until you get better.”

“And I told you, the longer you’re around me, the higher the risk of you getting sick. You’re already missing work because of me. If you get sick, you’ll miss even more. What if they fire you?”

“I promise you, that’s not going to happen.” Ryu sent me a reassuring smile but I didn’t feel very reassured at all. “Our managers were very understanding when I told them.”

I slid down in my chair, setting the empty cup on the table. “You could still get sick and spread it to the other members.”

“I won’t get sick.”

“How can you be sure of that?”

“Because I have a phenomenal immune system,” he grinned, making me scoff. 

“What was that you said to me? ‘Famous last words,’ was it?”

“Except I’m not going outside in the winter without a coat only to be caught in the rain.”

I opened my mouth to reply only to scowl, realizing he was right. “Wipe that grin off your face, Ata Ryutaro.”

“Yes, darling,” he chuckled, returning to the task at hand. 

I tried to ignore the fluttering in my chest and the warmth at the tips of my ears when he called me that. I adored it when he called me darling, but it wasn’t something he said often, especially not in public. 

I couldn’t find the smile that came to my lips. I truly was the luckiest human on earth. “Hey, Ryu?”

“Yes?” He paused what he was doing to look at me. “Do you want some more tea?”

I shook my head. “I just wanted to thank you. You really are an amazing boyfriend.”

“You don’t have to thank me,” he mumbled, hiding his face from me.

“I love you.”

His eyes met mine, filled with love and warmth. “I love you, too.”

━━━━━━༻☔༺━━━━━

I stretched my arms over my head, smiling as I breathed in the fresh air of the morning. After a couple of days under Ryu’s care, I was nearly back to my old self, though my body was still a bit achy. At least I could breathe properly now and the room didn’t spin when I got up too quickly. 

The time spent with him was a nice bonus, too. I never wanted this to end, but I knew he had to be getting back to work. With one last look at the cloudy sky, I headed back inside to wake up Ryu. Just as I reached the door, I heard a sneeze from the other side followed by a soft groan. 

I pushed the door open with a frown, taking in the appearance of my boyfriend. He still looked tired, his brown eyes lacking their usual luster. He seemed pale, too. “Babe, you okay?”

He smiled at me but it was obviously forced. “I’m fine.”

“You just sneezed.”

He seemed embarrassed that I had heard him. Before he could reply, though, another sneeze ripped from him, followed by a groan as he clutched his head. Rather than deny the obvious, he just pouted at me.

I hummed, approaching the bed so I could take his face between my hands. I could feel how warm he was before my forehead even met his. “You’ve got a fever.”

His fingers curled around my wrist, lips brushing against my own when he spoke. “I think I caught your flu…”

“Yeah? What happened to that phenomenal immune system of yours, hm?” I teased softly, brushing the hair from his face.

“You’re really going to tease me when I feel this bad?”

“Sorry, baby,” I chuckled, pressing a kiss to his lips. When I tried to pull away, he chased me with a whine. I chuckled, knowing how clingy and whiny he could get when he was sick. “Well, on the bright side, I get to return the favor and nurse you back to health.”

“‘M sorry,” he mumbled as he laid back down. “Will you stay with me?”

“You don’t even have to ask.” I slid in next to him and he slotted his body against mine, face buried in my neck as his limbs wrapped around me. I hummed softly, running my hands through his hair until his breathing evened out.

Maybe this makes me a bad person, but… I’m kind of happy that he caught my flu. God, I sound like such a bitch thinking that way, especially since I knew he was going to be feeling miserable, but I do love being able to take care of him. Despite being younger than me, he’s always been the caretaker in the relationship, going out of his way to accommodate me and my needs. It feels nice to be able to take care of him for a change, to have him rely on me.

His phone vibrated on the bedside table and I cursed softly, reaching my arm behind me to try and grab it. It was not comfortable at all but his limbs were like chains around my body, holding me in place so I couldn’t really move. I’m not entirely sure how I did it, but I managed to grab a hold of his phone, answering it without much thought so it wouldn’t wake him up.

“Hello?” I spoke softly, not wanting to disturb his sleep.

Zin said my name in surprise. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

“I’m feeling great, actually. Ryu is a really good nurse.”

“That’s good to hear. Why are you whispering, though?”

“He’s asleep and I don’t want to wake him up.”

There was a moment of silence and then a deep sigh on the other end of the line. “He’s sick, isn’t he?”

“Um… kind of?” I replied sheepishly. “I’m really sorry, Zin-san. I tried to get him to leave but you know how stubborn he is…”

Zin chuckled. “Yeah, I know. No need to apologize.”

There was muffled talking in the background before the phone shifted to Likiya. “Hey, little one. You feeling better?”

“I’m doing great, Likiya-chan, but Ryu caught my flu, I think.”

“I figured he would,” he replied with a laugh. “Listen, we’ll be there soon but don’t tell Ryu.”

“Eh?” I replied louder than intended, making Ryu mumble and squeeze himself closer to me. “You’re coming here? What for?”

“We wanted to check on you and cheer you up, but I suppose we’ll be doing that for Ryu now.”

“But all of you are going to get sick, too,” I frowned.

“Don’t worry about us, little one, just worry about taking care of our Ryu. See you soon.”

I blinked dumbly as the sound of the dial tone filled my ear. Do these boys have no self-preservation at all? They’re skipping work to come here and risking getting sick in the process, thus keeping them out of work even longer. I sighed deeply, setting the phone down on the bed.

Something tells me this isn’t going to end well. The Rampage is known for having only one brain cell combined and stuffing them all into our small apartment with a sick Ryu and an introverted Kazu? What the hell could possibly go wrong?

━━━━━━༻☔༺━━━━━

I stepped outside, hands stuffed into the pocket of Ryu’s hoodie as I glanced around. Likiya had messaged me a few minutes ago saying that they were about ten minutes away from the apartment so I figured I’d come out and meet them. A few of my neighbors aren’t very fond of strangers in the building and these guys would no doubt be loud on their way up. I also didn’t have much faith that they wouldn’t go to the wrong apartment despite knowing where we lived.

A familiar-looking black car pulled up to the curb and Dia stepped out of the back, looking annoyed. The driver was Kelso again and she, too, looked annoyed as she jumped out of the car, eyes narrowed at Dia. She was still wearing that ridiculous hat which I now realized was Buu from the Dragonball series.

“Go away!” Dia scowled, folding her arms over her chest. “I already told you, I’m not buying your fake CDs!”

“How dare you! They’re not fake, they’re economic,” defended Kelso with a huff.

“They’re fake and you should be in jail!”

“Jokes on you, I was just released from jail!”

I watched the two of them argue back and forth, unsure of how to proceed. Do I try to break it up? That sounded like more effort than I was willing to spare, especially since I needed to be at full battery to deal with the storm that is the Rampage.

Speak of the devil…

Two tan vans pulled up to the curb behind the black car. The sliding door on the first van opened up before it even came to a stop, Shohei jumped out of the vehicle with a grin as he cried out my name. I had no time to prepare myself before his body barreled into my own, arms so tight around me that it knocked the air from my lungs.

“Nee-chan~” he sang with a grin. “I missed you~”

Likiya rushed over with a scowl. “Put her down, Shohei! She just recovered from being really sick!”

He pouted at being scolded before doing as he was told, putting me back on the ground.

I sucked in some air, resisting the urge to cough as I patted his shoulder. “Good to see you, too, Sho-chan.”

“How are you?” asked Likiya softly, holding out his arms for a hug. It was much softer than the one Shohei had given.

“I’m doing well. Wish I could say the same for Ryu.”

“Don’t worry, he’ll be better in no time,” he reassured me, giving me a gentle squeeze before pulling away.

I realized the arguing had stopped and I glanced over at the two women, both of whom were staring at the men with wide eyes. Dia’s eyes were trained on Makoto while Kelso’s were trained on Takuma. The scene behind them changed to pink, sparkles and roses appearing around their heads as hearts appeared in their eyes.

Shit, am I hallucinating again? I quickly shook my head, rubbing at my eyes before looking at them again. They were just standing there staring at the men, no sparkles in sight.

“You okay?” Kazuma patted my arm, tilting his head to the side. Hokuto was beside him, sending me a concerned look.

“Yeah… yeah, I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” frowned Hokuto, reaching forward to feel my forehead. “You’re not warm, that’s good.”

“Sorry, I just zoned out, that’s all. Why don’t we all go inside? It’s getting colder out here.”

Shohei and Kenta didn’t need to be told twice as they darted into the building, followed by Zin who was trying to wrangle them in. The rest slowly filtered inside and I noticed the two girls following as if being pulled by an invisible stream tied to their bias.

Rui was the last one outside, getting a bag from the van. As he turned toward me, I noticed the woman from the car sitting on top of the van. Just like the other two, there were sparkles and roses around her head as she stared at Rui, hearts in her eyes.

“So dreamy~” she sighed, grinning like a fool.

Rui blinked, looking at me. “Did you say something, nee-san?”

“You heard that, too?”

“Yes.”

My eyes widened at the woman. Was she not a hallucination, after all? I quickly waved at him. “Come on, Rui, let’s get inside! I think the cold is getting to our brains.”

The woman looked up, winking at me before disappearing before my eyes.

━━━━━━༻☔༺━━━━━━

[ask-obt]

I feel like this question has already been asked but i can’t remember and I couldn’t find the answer by searching his tag, so: What was the role of Akio in the original OBT? From what i can tell he’s meant to be Rune’s son, but what about his father? Is there a chance he could appear in the current comic, or would he just be repurposed into a new character? (Sorry for long prompt btw)

// the explanation was a bit buried into this ask here (which also talks about other plot points from old OBT), but I'd be happy to give a more accessible version of an explanation as well as some extra context! so akio is the remnant of an arc I had in mind for rune from the very early era of preboot OBT up until I officially scrapped him in 2020. october 6th, 2020 in fact (happy die day you little freak)! in old OBT his role was to be the son of rune and some rando from the luxio tribe in a one night stand, mostly to stir drama between her and kodali. later on it turned out that luxio had the same name as one of my partner's characters (a mew named Xander), and we joked about Xander shapeshifting into a Luxio and blending into the tribe and getting together with rune... and then I made doodles of a vulpix with fun little mew traits, and got attached to the idea! around that time I was gearing up for the reboot of OBT, so he's... well, I was gonna say alolan, but this was actually my first doodle of that fire opal vulpix concept!

and then I thought "actually it'd be more fun if he was kantonian and also will help differentiate his design from rune" which is where you get the current iteration of his design that I use for memeing purposes

then with this being in the reboot timeline, it meant it started intersecting and butting heads with other arcs I had planned. I can probably go more into detail with that once we're a bit further along in the story, but basically rune was A Little Cringe for the circumstances she ended up with xander in the reboot, which would've ended up giving akio a bit of tasty insecurity as he got older and realized he resembled his dad in several ways he didn't like.

one of those ways being that he was flirty, but didn't want to commit to having a family

but that said... these were all headcanons for akio when he was older, aka either in the epilogue of OBT or in a potential sequel. which would've meant I'd have to carry around a baby character that I didn't really have any strong feelings about, a character arc for rune that was fitting with the story less and less over time, all for an epilogue or sequel that may or may not have seen the light of day. don't get me wrong, i still LOVE the idea of exploring this type of arc. but... does it have to be rune's son? she has a bunch of other arcs to explore, and her experiencing motherhood was just complicating the story in a way that wasn't fun to write. overall, it stopped fitting with the themes of OBT and needed to be cut in order to tell the story I actually wanted to tell. so nowadays, akio is a funny little in-joke with myself as a remnant of a long forgotten storyline, and is floating around my brain like a dvd screensaver. maybe someday he'll find a home in a story (he'd be more likely to find another life in my original project before OBT), maybe I'll use him in some sort of RP/collab, or maybe he'll keep collecting dust. only time will tell!

[echoghost1]

Five Fav Fics

got tagged by @jackdaw-sprite to pick 5 of my favorite fics that I've written! (here's their list)

this is gonna be hard cuz I have over 100 to chose from... ( ╯□╰ )

at least they don't have to be complete right?

Under the read more are the ones I chose

These aren't in order, just five that I picked

Carnival Mythika

Summary: What starts as a fun day at the carnival takes a turn after an innocent mistake. Danny gets separated from his friends at the carnival and asks the fortune teller for help to put him in the right direction, or maybe just back to the place he last saw them, the Cryptid Zoo.

Reason: this fic is my baby 😭 it's practically a novel and it really won't be that hard to change a few things and make this an original story because of how much of an AU it is. It's not done yet and it's taking me forever to write mostly because I keep having to take breaks because the emotional parts are so fricken heavy. Danny goes through it. he has a horrible time and it's all emotional trauma If you haven't read it, which it's an over 60k incomplete work with lots of angst and heavy topics, so I don't blame you. BUT if you wanna just read ch. 3 and let me know what you think （*＾-＾*）

Lively Conversations In Dead Man’s Land

Summary: Danny goes on a voluntary field trip to help his suffering grades.

Reason: This is one of the first fics I ever wrote way back in 2013 during PhannieMay (now DannyMay). The prompt was Western and I just went ham with a fluffy GrayGhost field trip fic. I had so much fun writing it and I still enjoy it today.

Quoth the Librarian, “But I’m Alone?”

Summary: Eleanor loved her job at the school library. She always made sure to come in early to make sure everything was just right before the students came. Today something beat her there.

Reason: One of the many fics I wrote for my first phic phight (2021) that I liked but it didn’t get much traction. The premise is simple, just a “what happened to this side character after a scene from the show” + making up a random OC that may never be used again.

Parallels

Summary: It's amazing the things you learn on a field trip.

Reason: My take on a reveal fic where Maddie & Danny try to have a normal mother-son bonding time during a field trip only for Danny to get triggered by something innocuous. A big part of the reason I’m proud of it was because I figured the trigger was so obvious but every comment that mentioned it was surprised by how perfect it was despite having never thought of it themselves.

A Night in La Casa del Sol

Summary: La Casa del Sol is an abandoned Bed and Breakfast on the North end of town, which like any good dilapidated building, has the reputation of being haunted. Paulina may act like an airhead, but she can still put two and two together. If her favorite ghost only comes out of hiding when there's another ghost around, she sure hopes her Abuela was right about the place. Danny is fist clueless, and then just confused, but mostly wants to make sure Paulina doesn't get hurt. Besides, what's the worst that could happen? Another sleepless night?

Reason: Even though it took me a while to add the final chapter to this one I think it was worth the wait. I had fun with a more classic haunted house type horror of Paulina and Danny exploring the old B&B together. That and that last chapter man, I don’t want to spoil it if you haven’t read it or if you did and forgot (it has been three years since I posted that final chapter lol)

And honorable mention goes to...

I think it would be illegal for me not to mention jackdaw’s favorite bedtime story 😜

Lost and Found

Summary: His parents had always warned him about the dangers in the woods.

Reason: Fae AU! Lost Time flavored Fae AU even! Also, like I said, Jackdaw really enjoys it If you don’t believe me check the comment section on that fic But I also really like it too. It was fun to write and it had my two favorite things, an au and taking an idea someone else did but putting my own spin on it! Fun fact: the final spoken bit of dialogue was actually the very first line that I thought of. It’s what made me write this story. It was just so good. And I’m happy to report that it did in fact pay off

[cheerstotheelites-if]

Oh god it's been a year already??? April 8??? Wasn't it just March yesterday?

Oh, uh, s h i t

Happy 1 Year Anniversary! (Holy crap)

Man, time sure is f a s t. One year of being here with you guys and just vibing. Zamn. That's crazy.

I know I keep saying this, but I really do appreciate all of you guys for sticking around for so long. I never expected the silly little stories with my silly little characters 13 year old me was writing and creating would come to this in the end. It's honestly just so mind boggling, and I want to say thank you. Thank you for showing your support, for being so patient with me, for those that send such fun asks and prompts to answer, and just being so cool in general. Don't say that you aren't. I'll fight ye on that. I also thank the lurkers in my followers, I know you and I don't tango too much with interactions but your likes, reblogs or just generally looking through is enough for me.

I'd also like to thank the mutuals and friends I made in the IF community and in the Write Club Discord server for being so cool and helpful. I never expected to make any mutuals here, and I'm honestly glad I did.

I'm kissing you all platonically on the cheek because you deserve it for being the best. 💙💙💙

Now, for the Anniversary Special content...... I don't have one written. I already have a short one for 1k Followers and is just waiting to be posted, but I forgot to prep one for the Anniversary. 🥲😭😭

I was planning to make a small IF to commomerate it, but college finals reared its ugly head like a disease so I didn't have enough time. So, instead, I'll just give y'all some Beta and BtS facts about this IF before it came to be as it is now. Hope that'll suffice, and I promise I'll make it up to y'all next year. 😭😭

Back in the earliest drafts for this IF, the prologue was supposed to start with a student Magus summoning an eldritch being from the underside of Reflection and it backfiring completely. The genre was supposed to fully embrace supernatural, but I ended up scrapping it instead for what we have now.

Beta Zephyrine was a mean girl diva; supposedly Fleur's opposite and bully. I changed it after deciding that Zeph's better off being Fleur's opposite in a more positive way (the version Zeph currently is) and genuinely being Fleur's friend, than whatever toxic mess the former was.

Eliseo was originally gonna be the big bad because of well… look at him. I ended up not doing that, because… look at him. He's simpable material, unfortunately.

Emery wasn't supposed to exist. I didn't originally intend for MC to learn nor have magic in the original drafts, thus no Familiar needed either, and let them be a non-magic character in the story. I changed my mind when I thought about how unfair that'll be, since that'll just make MC more of a damsel than a person with autonomy.

The 1586 Accident and the Willowsberg family as a whole was originally supposed to stay as a "myth" and unexplored as a whole. They were supposed to be mentioned only in passing and not talked about again.

In the early drafts, Fleur's parents were already dead/gone and she was working as her family bank's CEO at the start of the story. She was an outside figure that you'll meet through either Zephyrine or Weylyn.

Cooper was originally more of a loveable asshole back in his early characterization stages; smug know-it-all that loves to be a mischief maker. I have no idea what change happened to make him the hyper golden retriever he is now, but I don't regret it and I don't wanna know.

The choice of setting the IF in a rural city and in Lumintoile Academia specifically was based on old oneshots I wrote about Weylyn and Fleur 2-3 years ago. If you want to know what those oneshots are about, both of them are confessions scenes with Weylyn being the confessor.

Before Ophelia came to be as the 6th RO, she was originally supposed to be an antagonist, mostly due to a oneshot I wrote about her as a concept character 2 years ago. There were scenes planned where she would fight the cast and drama would ensue, but knowing what I know, I ended up scrapping the idea.

Weylyn's characterization didn't change much from his beta, surprisingly, and I think he's the only one who has retained his beta traits (besides some mild redesigning). I always intended him to be, well, him. The only things that did change are in spoiler territory, but very important to his characterization.

There were supposed to be 2 more side characters that you'll be introduced to in the early chapters with Fleur being a young CEO idea in mind, which were her two younger estranged cousins from her mother's side. I scrapped the idea for now, but they might make an appearance soon.

I had ideas to implement variables that show preferrences and proficiency in what magic MC uses, intending for them (MC) to be a jack-of-all trades instead of focusing solely on one magic. But then I thought about the long list of already existing variables I've written down, and went nope.

Eliseo & Fleur had the most rewrites and rehauls on their characterization. From what I can count and remember until recently, it's 10.

When I was making Emery, and basing him off of the Familiar Poll results, he was intented to be younger, 3 years old to be exact. I decided to age him up to 5 years old, because a) he would be too powerful, b) baby, c) "sir, that is a toddler and fresh out of infancy", and d) he would be too powerful.

The inspiration for the IF's whole vibes are from Kiersten White's 'The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein', V.C. Andrew's 'My Sweet Audrina', Laurie Anderson's 'Speak', Kyoukai no Kanata, Wonder Egg Priority, and the Dark Academia aesthetic itself.

This was originally supposed to be a self-contained story, more of a moment in the cast's life than something that will affect them in the long run or be actively going through with time, until I decided to add it into a growing timeline of events alongside other IF's.

[slytherinshua]

🍈 anon here!! i’ve decided to start writing again. i remember argos ago reading this fic on ao3 that was a one sided enemies to lovers thing and thought the prompt would be good for wonwoo. it’s still in very early stages and originally i was gonna write it as a slow burn but i think the direction i’m going rn is more humourous. it’s actually a hog warts crossover 😭 idk why but the idea just hit me

Omg??? That sounds so exciting SKDJSK!!! I LOVE HOGWARTS AUS AND I LOVE E2L MELON THIS IS GONNA BE SO GOOD!!! But you could probably tell from my username that I like Hogwarts stuff 😭 idk why but I’ve yet to write any Hogwarts aus on this acc?? I’ve written them in the past for txt but they were old writing so I never posted them but I wonder if I should plan smth now that you brought the idea into my head?? But omg I’d be so excited to read that so def give me updates of how it’s going!!!

[clouds-rambles]

Im not even gonna go anonymous anymore. Arghh asking for another request makes me feel guilty knowing you have an essay due so i'll just present you a little prompt!

Being immortal and outliving people you love, you know the drill. It must be sad and lonely. But you know what i feel like would be devastating? Just imagine Teyvat in a time loop. Meeting your friends for the first time, getting know them, hearing their plans and ambitions, sticking with them through dark times, falling in love... Reader just happens to be the one to witness all of it over and over and over again.

Don’t worry about it! I’m horrifically avoiding it right now. I’ll probably have some lunch and do some more of it after lunch. I’m talking about things I enjoy so hopefully it wont take up too much of my brain and we’re going to ignore the graphic novel I have to create in 2 weeks too lmao I’m a professional procrastinator

I have a bit of an idea with this so I hope you don’t mind it being platonic and with the Mondstat guys either. I’m going to reference a previous set of headcanons where you’re the leader of the winds. The two writings aren’t related relationship wise though.

Pairings; (Platonic) people of Mondstat x reader

Warning(s); angst

Keep reading under the cut!

You had done this cycle millions of times before. Before you even became the leader of the winds, when you were just a small spirit. Much like your friend Barbatos.

And while the archon of this land could sleep for thousands of years at a time you had elected to protect his people from the dangers that the god of freedom was too asleep to do anything about. And in fairness you can understand why Barbatos has been asleep many a time to avoid his brain contaminating with similar ideals to Decrabain. You can’t blame him really...

But you’re so horrifically lonely. And it’s not like you’re surrounded by an absence of people. In reality you often find yourself over compensating for your loneliness. Nights are often spent in the tavern conversing with mortals that you can’t quite understand.

You half wish you could ascend to Celestia, at least there you can be merry with fellow immortals and not have the constant threat of losing a friend dear.

You have known the Ragnvindr family for many generations. It’s not like they are hard to notice. Bright red hair and, more often than not, a sweet, bubbly personality. Not many of the Ragnvindr’s have been blessed with visions, but they all make their way through life the best way possible. And while they seem to show similar thought processes to the previous anemo archon, especially considering the fact they basically own the alcohol industry in Mondstat, and more recently Teyvat in her entirety. But when you see the family treating their employee’s so well and with a great wage you can’t help but think maybe humanity can move past the age of dictators. Or at least the humans of Mondstat.

The newest Ragnvindr, Diluc had always caught your eye. You had helped babysit both him and his brother while you weren’t busy reminiscing in memories of old mondstat and slaying monsters of your home. The air of change hangs heavy on the air when you’re around them, it seems like the winds you lead are trying to tell you something that you can’t yet decipher.

Until the day comes when you can. Seeing a broken, sobbing Diluc shut you out of his home not only made you sad. But, it infact reminded you that you shouldn’t get too close to mortals. For, like your friend Crepus’, mortal life is fleeting. 

You’ve seen many stories over the years, but there’s only so many times you can hear the same story before they all meld together.

Take Amber for instance, decided to become an Outrider because of her Grandfather. How many times had you heard that story? Someones grandfather joined the knights and inspired them? Too many to count. And as much as you want to remember Ambers story, you already know, like all the others, her memory will meld with the others. 

Kaeya’s story isn’t one you’ll forget quickly, especially when the deeds of  Khaenri'ah weigh heavy on your mind. Though you have seen a small handful of changing of alliance stories in your lifetime his is probably the one that’ll stick the most. Especially when the memory of him crying in your arms after the man he considered a father died. 

There’s this one young girl you remember from centuries ago. She reminds you of Barbara a lot. Carefree, loves the people she works for. Just this girl was born a few millennia too early. She was apart of the Windblume resistance alongside the bard Barbatos fashioned himself after. You had attempted to smuggle the girl out the fortress many a time yet she always wanted to help. 

Sometimes when you watch Barbara sing you can’t help but cry over a girl you considered your first friend after becoming leader of the winds. Barbara is under the impression that you hate her because of how you avoid the girl. But being constantly reminded of someone you couldn’t save in the end makes you so sad. You’re not sure how Barbatos copes with donning the face of a friend when you can barely look at the face of someone who reminds you of a lost friend.

Razor sits fondly on your mind. He reminds you of the people you did actually save in old Mondstat. You remember checking in on a handful of refugees that you had to hide in old caves and how easily they had climatized to foraging for food. Whenever you see Razor you’re reminded of another young boy who went missing millennia ago who was later found to have been raised by bears. 

Through the centuries you’ve become good at pairing up couples. You seem to be able to point out people who will later enter a marriage. You’re not sure if soulmates and reincarnation exists, but that’s your only explanation being able to point to couples so easily.

You wonder for an immortal like yourself would be blessed with a soulmate. Especially considering you weren’t originally in a humanoid form. Maybe there’s some thousand wind out there for you that you’ll never be able to meet and fall for because of this form.

Your mind stretches to Barbatos whenever you think this but you never let yourself linger on it for too long. Lord Barbatos doesn’t like commitment, and you’re very much content with that, yes sir. 

Your eyes often linger on Rosaria as you often ponder if she thinks she’s the only nun to have strayed from typical nun doings. You remember telling a small Rosaria tales of Decrabains nuns and how they helped with the resistance against the tyrant. You wonder if that’s what gave her the idea to stray from typical nunnery. 

You smile upon Lisa fondly, a bright young woman with aspirations as high as the stars. Much like Rosaria you remember telling a young Lisa about alchemy and sorcery. She had such a knack for it, and seeing the woman return after only two years of study was a little disheartening. But you’re sure there will be people after her who will have similar aspirations with better outcomes. It’s not unlike you’ve seen people scurry their lives away in the pursuit of knowledge. You can understand her want for a different life.

As much as it hurts you in the end most, if not all, the people of Mondstat have buried themselves in your heart. And like you have done countless times before you’ll have to move on from them once you’re dead, no matter how much it hurts. Your mind ponders to Adeptus Xiao of Liyue. He’s under a similar curse to you. The curse of being alone while being surrounded by people. You wonder if that’s why Xiao has distanced himself from mortals.

And as much as you feel like you should take a page out of his book, you find yourself falling in love with Mondstat’s citizens over and over again.

[fuckallthegood0nesweretaken]

Daryl Dixon X Reader - Boy or Girl

Title: Boy or Girl

Words: 455

Warnings: Fluff, prison era

A/N: This is an excerpt I cut from my upcoming Daryl fic but I loved it too much to get rid of it completely. (This is also a repost because it wasn’t showing up in the tags)

If you’d like to request something, send me an ask. I’d love to write for you! There’s a Kiss Prompt list, a NSFW Alphabet list, and a Headcanon list. If you have an original idea, don’t hesitate to send in an ask for that as well.

If you’d like to support me, I have a Ko-Fi and a Patreon.

Walking Dead Masterlist

Masterlist

~~~~~~~

You and Daryl had spent the last few hours working on baby names. It was a little early and you didn’t know if it was a boy or girl, but it helped calm you down from the event of the last few days. The two of you were curled up on your bunk, your head on his chest and his arm around you and on your belly. Your fingers were intertwined, his thumb rubbing gentle circles. Your belly had a slight bump, and Daryl had a hard time keeping his hands off of it, not that you minded.

“What about Alanna? If it’s a girl?” You asked him.

“Alanna’s nice.” You laughed and looked up at him.

“Doesn’t seem like you like that.”

“No, I don’t.” He shook his head and you saw a smile. “Emma?”

“No thanks. Knew an Emma and she was a bitch. Lily?”

“Never liked names after flowers. Too cliché. Harper?”

“Maybe,” you said. “Lucy?”

“Too old-school.”

“You’re right. It is old-school. What about Isabella?” You looked at Daryl and he smiled softly.

“Isabella. I like that name.” He looked at you. “Isabella if it’s a girl?”

“Isabella if it’s a girl. Now onto the boys!”

“Owen’s a good name,” Daryl said after a moment.

“I like that. But what about Michael?”

“Nah, sounds douchey.”

“Peter?” You said.

“Maybe. I like Hunter.” You looked up at him, a teasing look on your face.

“I think you like that ‘cause you’ll say you took Hunter hunting.” You knew you were right when you saw the faint pink on his ears. You snorted out a laugh and buried your face in his chest.

“Stop teasin’,” he muttered. That only made you laugh harder, clinging to his shirt.

“What about Jack?” He said. “I’ve always liked that name.”

“Jack,” you said, laughs subsiding. “I like that too. Got any more?”

“Nah. So which is it gonna be? Jack or Owen?”

“I like both of them. Got anything we could flip?” Daryl shook his head and you racked your brain.

“I got it!” You said excitedly. Reaching for your gun, you took one bullet out and gripped it on your fingers. “If the point is facing the wall, we pick Owen. If it’s facing away from the wall, we pick Jack. Sound good?”

“Hell yeah.” Grinning, you set the bullet on the ground and spun it. Watching it closely, it felt like it was spinning forever until it slowly spun to a stop, the point facing away from the wall.

“Jack,” you breathed. You giggled and pulled Daryl in for a kiss. You were both smiling and you were filled with giddiness.

“Jack or Isabella. Either way, our baby is gonna have a kickass name.”

[msmarvelouswinchester]

Love In Sin

Chapter 9

Summary - Special Agent Winchester is forced to go undercover with his frenemy Special Agent L/N when they try to track down a notorious drug dealer. How will Y/N and Dean complete their task? Will their relationship worsen or will new feelings emerge between them?

Pairing - AU!Detective Dean Winchester x Reader

Warning - None, Fluff-ish

Word Count - 1.5k

Square Filled - Clothes Sharing ( @spndeanbingo )

A/N 1 - Surprise, this series lives! So, it has been a loooong time. I wasn't originally planning to post this part today but my college is killing me and I am hardly getting any writing (and reading) done. This was already done and edited so I finally decided to post this today.

A/N 2 - This may seem like a filler chapter but it's not, trust me. It's a very important chapter which plays a crucial part in the next chapters. ENJOY!

Beta'd by the absolute sweetheart @deanwanddamons <3<3

Divider by @firefly-graphics

Series Masterlist

Groaning loudly, Dean dropped his head as you paced around the room, complaining for the hundredth time that night.

“Will you stop?” He grumbled. You came to a halt when you heard his words and turned to look towards him. Throwing a glare his way you continued your pacing .

“Y/N/N, stop it. This isn't going to solve our problem - it'll only annoy the tenants downstairs,” he said and got up from his chair.

“What are we supposed to do? My pacing around is definitely not helping neither is your what, fourth glass of whiskey,” you retorted.

“Third,” Dean said, “this is my third glass and I'm tryin’ to get drunk.”

“We ended up in this situation because we were slacking and this is exactly what we are doing again,” you raised your voice, regretting your decision to stay at Dean’s house with him, “if you won't even try to get out of this situation, I'll be going back to my house tomorrow.”

“You won't stay alone in that house until we catch that son of a bitch,” he said, setting his glass and walking over to you, “it's dangerous.”

You knew it was dangerous considering how the house you had rented in Kansas was destroyed when you had gone back to get your belongings - furniture was thrashed, utensils were broken and clothes were torn, but nothing was stolen. It was clear that Crowley's men were trying to send you a sign to leave their boss alone.

It was Bobby who suggested that staying alone and travelling a few kilometres everyday to discuss the proceedings of the case would be a bad idea since Crowley and Co. were waiting for the perfect opportunity to cause disruption in the case. And knowing how ruthless Crowley could be, murder and kidnapping didn't seem like a far-fetched option for him.

Dean had piped up saying it would be better to stay at his house since he had noticed your house had a weak security system. His other reason was that he had a car, unlike you.

Needless to say, you had reluctantly agreed to stay with the green eyed detective, but deep down inside, you knew that staying with Dean gave you a sense of security and you didn't want to let that go.

“We will figure a way out,” he said, standing a little too close to you.

“How?” You asked the obvious question.

“I have contacted my brother. He will be working as our lawyer to get them to drop the charges. Sammy will be here early morning tomorrow,” he said, removing a stray piece of hair from your face, “but you gotta cool down, sweetheart. Give that pretty little head of yours a little rest.”

“I-I can't. I am freaking out Dean,” you said.

“I know. You have almost bore a hole in the ground by your pacing,” you hit his arm lightly, making him chuckle, “I'm thinkin’ about the case too.”

“Is Sam-will he be able to….this is a critical one,” you mumbled, looking down at the floor.

“I have faith in my brother and he can go to hell and back to save me just like I can. Sammy will do anything to help us. Trust me,” he said, putting a finger under your chin, prompting you to look up at him. He leaned in and placed a kiss on your forehead. This simple act worked like a sedative and you calmed down a bit.

“Join me for a drink,” Dean said and strolled his way back to the couch. You followed him and took a seat beside him. Pouring a drink, he handed you the glass.

“One drink. Only.” You said.

“Alright.”

“Who do you think might be the mole?” you asked, taking a sip of your drink

“It can be anyone. Charlie, Kevin, Bobby, Rufus-”

“Ruby, you,” he nodded, “me.”

“Like I said, it could be anyone,” Dean said.

“Motive?”

“Depends.”

“Do you think we can prove our innocence?” You asked, “the cops kinda caught us red handed and-”

“It's….tough.” Dean said and jumped out of his seat, knocking over the tumbler of ice.

You tilted your head in confusion, furrowing your eyebrows.

“What?” You insisted.

“A few years back, when we were only fledglings in the bureau, Rufus Turner was working Crowley’s case. This information was in the case file that Bobby gave to us. He had arrested two men in his gang but by the time they had got to know about that dick, they had already lost him. He had escaped the feds again,” he explained, flailing his arms all around in excitement.

“Maybe we can find out who those two men were and interrogate them about Crowley,” you said, smiling a little for the first time that night, knowing you had a lead.

“Now all we need is access to those two men's files. FBI is not gonna help us so we have to take matters in our own hands. I’ll call Ash and ask him to find those,” Dean said and ran back to his room to get his phone.

“Ash? What about Charlie?” You asked, when he came back to the room, “And shouldn't you tell Sam first? He is our lawyer and he should be informed about this.”

“It's not like we are gonna interrogate a witness and Ash is a good friend of mine. He is not a fed whereas Charlie works at the bureau and right now we can't trust anyone who works there because we don't know who might be working as a two-faced devil and ratting us out to the God of the Underworld,” Dean said, dialing Ash’s number.

“Ash,” he said when the said man picked up the phone after a few rings.

“Listen, we are kind of in a tricky situation here-oh you heard….not really, we got one week….no it won't….I know you're a busy man, Ash,” Dean said, rolling his eyes, “but we need your help….yeah….the thing is we need access to the old case files related to the drug mafia Crowley….yeah I know that genius….can't you-fine….I owe you one.”

“So?” You asked, hoping for good news.

“Ash will let us know by morning,” he said.

“Can we trust him?”

“Yes.”

“Okay,” you reached for the bottle of whiskey.

“What do you think you're doing?” Dean asked, raising his brow.

“Relaxin’,” you shrugged, “you should try to relax sometimes.”

“You think you're such a smartass, huh?” He said and plopped down on the couch beside you, making you giggle.

“Thanks for tonight, Winchester,” you turned towards your friend.

“For what? For helping you calm down when you were running around like a headless chicken?” He smirked.

“Shut up,” you grumbled, “you know what I mean.”

“I'm here for you. We're in this shit together and I promise to get us out of this mess,” he said as you moved closer to him.

“And I have faith in you.” He pulled you closer and kept your head on his shoulder. He hummed in response. You closed your eyes, sighing loudly, but the sweet moment of coziness was interrupted quickly.

Your eyes flew open, “You son of a bitch, Winchester! Way to ruin a moment! How dare you put ice in my sweatshirt?” Dean laughed out loud.

“First of all, that's my sweatshirt you are wearing and you were looking too peaceful with your head on my shoulder,” he laughed.

“Fuck you!” You growled, and hit his arm hard.

“Ow!” He rubbed his arms. Dean effectively dodged your second attack, “woah, easy there tiger.” By now you were laughing too. As your laughter died down, you looked at Dean and saw him smiling softly at you. You blushed furiously under his strong gaze.

“You hungry?” Dean asked, clearing his throat.

“Uh-huh. Kinda forgot about food today until now.” You said, diverting your eyes.

“I'm thinking about ordering pizza. You okay with that?” He asked.

“Sure.” You said.

Half an hour later, as you were enjoying the delicious pizza and watching some crappy tv trying to put a break on the racing thoughts, you heard Dean speak.

“About earlier,” he sighed.

“Oh yeah. You better be sorry Winchester,” you gave him an annoyed look.

“No, I'm not sorry for that. It was fun,” he laughed.

“No it wasn't,” you said, but failed to hide the smile threatening to take over your face.

“It made you smile,” he pointed out.

“Fine, you're forgiven,” you said as Dean gave you a cheeky grin.

“In all seriousness, what I said earlier, I meant it. I promise to get us out of this mess,” he said, leaning down to give you a chaste kiss on your cheek, your skin tingling with an unknown sensation.

“I know,” you said, “I think I should go to bed now. We have a long day ahead of us.” Dean nodded as you got up and made your way over to his guest room.

Let me know if you want to be tagged in the series!

Feedback is highly appreciated!

[drawlfoy]

The Wonders of Ohio P.6

masterlist (catch up on parts 1-5 here!!)

request guidelines

pairing: draco x reader

request: my original idea :))

summary: y/n’s senior year was going to be great, but her British exchange student is a little weird. this is NOT a non-magic AU. draco’s still a wizard in this fsjifkszfjkd

warnings: language, fainting, bad driving, mentions of drinking and drug use

a/n: eeee this is such a fun bit to write. thank you all so much for being there for me. this is definitely one of my favorite fics i’ve written since it gives me so much creative liberty and the fact that i get feedback and readers for it...just warms my heart. if you’re reading this: thank you so, so much for sticking around. i might come around with more oneshots soon. anyways i hope you enjoy the initial descent into the real real plot. also fluff will be coming soon i promise but i wasn’t lying when i said this was slowburn

tags tags tags @gruffle1 @missmulti @cleopatera @hahaboop @accio-rogers @geeksareunique @eltanin-malfoy @war-sword @cams-lynn @itsivyberry @ayo-cowbelly @nerd-domland @yesnerdsblog @shizarianathania @evanstanfanatic @strawberriesonsummer @hariosborn @night-ving @icintliviinyiniilsiji @erisdogwood @loveissupernatural

word count: 3.4k

song recs:

a pearl -- mitski

movement -- hozier

revival -- deerhunter

Draco was crying.

Or, at least, someone was. The gasps coming from just a wall away were apparent, but Y/N could hear a voice that didn’t quite sound like Draco--which had to be a trick of the mind, because there could be no one in there but him.

She rapped on the door against her better judgement to be met with a flurry of movement--fabric rustling,  and a soft pop that echoed through the air.

“Draco? Are you alright in there?”

Y/N found herself wishing that he wouldn’t open the door. After the Homecoming ask, the last thing she wanted was to see his stupid pretty face again, but she was a good host sister. Emphasis on sister.

To her shock, the door swung open. Just a few inches, just enough for her to see the pile of black shredded paper in the middle of his room and a drained looking Draco glaring back at her.

“Can I help you?” His once pristine white shirt was gray in some places, like he had rubbed ashes on it. 

“I just thought--did you burn something?”

“No. What is it?”

She looked at him a bit closer. His eyes didn’t look red rimmed with the dead giveaway of a crying session, but they looked close. The furrow in his brow was from worry instead of his usual sternness and he kept nervously pulling down at his left sleeve. 

Draco wasn’t crying, but he was about to.

“I…” There was something deeply unsettling about seeing Draco so uncollected and fidgety--almost like seeing a fish out of water or an American conservative with an adequate understanding of class struggles.The air was charged with something yet again, so much so that Y/N could feel the hair on her arms stand up. She decided to avoid damaging his masculinity any further. “Nothing. It just smelled a little like smoke. I wanted to make sure you weren’t burning a candle or anything. You know how my mom is about that.”

He continued to stare at her.

“Would you like me to leave you alone?”

“Please.” 

Well, that was embarrassing thought Y/N as she made her way back down the hall and to her backpack. I get rejected twice in one day. Smooth.

The days following were profoundly more uncomfortable. Breakfasts became uncomfortably akin to the Silent Game and Draco stopped coming out for tea in the evenings. The drives to and from school were decorated only by occasional bits of small talks or grumbles of exams. In short, Y/N knew that she had overstepped a boundary and Draco was pulling back.

School had finally become crazy. Y/N’s life became so entrenched with letters of recommendation and 200 word supplements that the Draco shaped hole in her life was bearable. After all, she was fine before he came, and she was fine now. She’d been silly, allowing herself to fantasize about a kid with some serious trauma and family issues that clearly had personal things that handle before he thought about getting all cozy with someone who was not in the slightest compatible with him. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

oOo

If someone turned a glass of whole milk into a human, that person would be Chad. He was the poster child of an “American” boy--tall, warm blonde hair, slightly tanned skin, and cornflower blue eyes. 

But his personality? Not so much. 

“My beloved husband!” Y/N called out as she saw him speaking to her mother in the foyer while Draco glowered in the corner. She bounded down the stairs in record time, leaping into his arms as her strappy heels swung from her hands. He smelled of cotton and laundry detergent. 

“Hey nerd,” he said, swinging her around in a circle before setting her down. “Did you finish the Econ homework? I was hoping I could take a picture before I leave…”

Y/N drew back to smack him on the shoulder. “You disgust me.”

“You abuse me.”

“And I’ll do it again,” said Y/N. She had forgotten how funny he was. 

“Oh, you two,” Mrs. Y/L/N cut in, stepping between the two and pressing the boutonnière into Y/N’s hands. “Always bickering like a married couple.”

Lizzy snorted from the top of the stairs where she was struggling to stuff a light jacket into her purse. “Hot take.”

“Hold still,” commanded Y/N, holding the pin and attempting to attach it to his lapel. “I’m literally going to accidentally stab you. Cut it out.”

He made a face down at her. “Do it. You won’t.”

“Oh? I won’t?”

“Y/N,” Mrs. Y/L/N’s exasperated voice warned.

“I’ll refrain, but only because the rug we’re standing on was my Grandmother’s,” Y/N said to him, her voice dripping with sweetness. “Consider yourself lucky that you’re not on the tile.”

“I’ve never been more thankful that my late grandmother-in-law had such impeccable taste.” 

“Suck up.”

“Oh, because you’re such a rebel.”

“It’s called motivation!”

“Honey, I want a divor-”

“For Christ’s sake, stop flirting or I’m going to puke,” a cool voice cut in. The group turned to see Sylvia standing in the doorway, clad in a flowing black dress that just barely ghosted over the top of the floor. 

“You look radiant, darling,” Mrs. Y/L/N said.

“And we weren’t flirting,” said Y/N.

Sylvia sent her a little wink before walking to sit down on the couch across from Draco, who was currently perched cross legged and looking profoundly uncomfortable. 

Sylvia, Lizzy, and their dates all opted to take Lizzy’s car to the city while Chad, Y/N, and Draco took Chad’s. The plan was to drop Draco off at the school with ample time to prepare him for the uniquely traumatic experience that was ASB sanctioned after school events, and to the plan they stuck.

“Yeah, go ahead and treat me like your chauffeur, “ scoffed Chad as Y/N slid into the backseat next to Draco. The sports car was surprisingly narrow with hardly any space between them. If she wanted to, she could easily rest her thigh against his.

“It’s called being polite, dear,” said Y/N, flicking the back of his head before turning to face Draco. “You’re really gonna commit to this? Major props, but, like...you really don’t have to go to this if you don’t want to. You can even stay home. I know how to sneak you back in.”

Draco rolled his eyes. “I’m here for the American experience, right?”

“Hate to break it to you, but there is no uniform American experience. It’s all personalized, and I don’t know if you want yours to be seasoned with 14 year olds T-posing in a circle to...I don’t even know. Chad, what kind of music do they play at those places?”

“Fuck if I know. I don’t go to them either.”

“It’s fine. I told Heather I’d be there.”

“Ooookay, whatever you say,” Y/N said. 

They rode in silence for a few more beats. The wind outside was uncharacteristically strong for an early October day, and it looked like a storm was brewing. In their rush to get to the dance on time, they had neglected to take precaution against the wind and ran outside to Chad’s car without a second thought. Draco’s suit, while posh and put together, had clearly bore the brunt of this choice. His tie had become slightly rumpled and his hair mussed, a look that was all types of wrong on him.

“Draco?” she asked. He snapped to attention. “Your tie is all undone. Can I…?” Y/N motioned to his neck.

Wide-eyed and frozen, he met her with, “er...sure.” 

Y/N leaned forward, trying to think past how her thighs were just barely touching his. Her corsage (a tasteful red, thank you very much) bumped against his chest, flattening a bit. She wasn’t very familiar with ties--she’d never had to be in her past experiences--but whatever his was made of, it was expensive. The fabric felt silky and impossibly smooth in her hand as she carefully untied it.

Chad took a sharp turn into the school drop off lot, prompting Y/N to nearly topple into Draco’s chest. His arms shot out to steady her and retracted so quickly that she was left wondering if she imagined the whole ordeal. 

“So it’s true,” said Chad from the front. “Nerds do have bad upper body strength.”

“Shut up,” she responded. Her cheeks felt unbearably hot as she tried her best to focus on tightening Draco’s tie and ignore the fact that she was close enough to smell his cologne--a soft pine, she observed--and feel the shadow of his breath on her face. His hands were clasped together lap, tight enough to turn the knuckles white. 

It was an odd feeling, getting butterflies in her stomach while she was touching a boy that wasn’t her date as Chad careened towards a parking spot and pulled in so violently that Y/N almost went sprawling into Draco again. She looked up at him, getting ready to crack a joke about the absurdity of the situation or the questionable driving; instead, she found herself staring up into his eyes. 

His normally pale eyes looked darker than usual--his pupils were insanely dilated--but that was because it was dark in the car. Obviously. Out of the corner of her eye, Y/N could see his chest rising and falling with an urgency that she hadn’t noticed before.

“Do you want me to uh..fix your...your hair, too?” Y/N said, mentally cringing at how she stumbled over the sentence. To be fair, his hair was ruffled and out of place. It wasn’t like she was making an excuse to touch it or anything.

To that, Draco jerked away from her, his back brushing up against the opposite car door. “No. No, it’s ok. I’ll fix it myself.”

Y/N was sure that her face was tomato red.

“Alright buckaroo,” Chad said from the front, his nonchalant demeanor never more appreciated. “Your hot date is here. Get out of my car. We have a busy day of antiquing ahead.”

Any semblance of casualness left Draco’s body as his eyes widened. “Antiquing?”

“Yeah, remember the place I took you to right after you came here?” asked Y/N.

“Er...don’t you have anything better to do?”

“Excuse me?” She sat up straight so quickly that she felt her hair come slightly undone at the nape of her neck. “That’s rich, coming from the kid going to a school dance as a senior.” 

“It’s probably not going to even be open. It’ll be late by the time dinner’s over,” he said. 

“Since when do you care? Honestly, quit acting weird,” Y/N responded, scootching away from him as he made no effort to get out of the car. 

“I’m not--it’s--erm, nevermind, forget about it.” He cleared his throat, straightened his tie, and brushed off his lapels. “Heather must be waiting for me. Goodbye.”

After a little struggle, Draco managed to best the slightly confusing door handle of Chad’s car and was out the door. Y/N slid across the seat and out with him, shutting the door and grabbing the handle for the passenger side. 

“Y/N?” Draco’s voice called before she had the chance to fully get in and tell Chad to book it. 

“What’s up?”

He took a few steps forward, pausing just a couple feet away from her. His eyes were cast to the rain puddle ridden cement. “Promise me you won’t do anything stupid, okay?”

“I should be telling you that, king,” Y/N quipped. “Your first real American dance. If you go to any after parties, make sure to watch your drink. Don’t take any substances from strangers--or, anyone, really--”

“Y/N, he’s not a chick.” Chad, his hands still perched on the steering wheel, turned to peer out at her. “He’ll be fine. I think they have beer in Britain.”

“Well, whatever. Have Heather text me if I need to pick you up anywhere. And don’t get in any cars with someone who’s been drinking!”

“Y/N!”

“Ok, ok, I’m coming.” She slid into the car, turning one last time to say bye. Draco was already gone. “Only if I drive.”

oOo

“So Heather and Draco, huh?” 

Y/N scowled at Lizzy as she speared a piece of her salad particularly viciously. “I don’t know if it’s like that. I think he’s just being polite, or whatever. I think British people are just like that.”

“Why are we even talking about that boy?” Chad asked. “He’s got that whole Timothée Chalamet dying Victorian toddler aesthetic if Timothée was blonde and had a perpetual stick up his ass.”

“In a hot way, though,” said Lizzy, her eyebrows wiggling. Jonathan scowled at her side. “Oh, don’t be so jealous. As if I’d ever go for a kid who doesn’t even know what Snapchat is.”

“I don’t understand what Heather sees in him,” Chad continued, his fettuccine plate long forgotten. “He’s got the personality of a wet rag, and she’s so bubbly and...I don’t even know. Do you guys get what I mean?”

“Draco’s got personality,” said Y/N. 

“Not like Heather.”

“It’s not his fault he’s reserved. He’s actually really funny.”

“And that’s what I like to call rose-tinted glasses,” Chad said, gently poking her cheek. 

“Hey! I’m the one who lives with him.”

“Whatever. Let’s just call for the bill. I’m not hungry anymore.” Chad folded up his napkin, placing it on top of the tablecloth and ignoring Y/N’s protest as he got out his wallet and placed a credit card on the table. “It’s on me, guys. You know how my parents are. They’re just happy that we’re all getting together again instead of holing up in our rooms.”

“Thank god junior year is over,” Sylvia added. “That’s really kind of you. At least let me get the tip?”

As the group bickered over the payment options and flagged down the waiter, Y/N noticed her phone lighting up with a notification.

Heather, 6.48pm: Hey girly! Sorry to bug you on your night but Draco wanted to check in and ask where you guys are/what you’re planning on doing tonight.

“Who’s that?” Chad asked, looking down at the little paragraph in the gray message bubble.

“Just Heather. Draco wants to know what we’re doing. Probably because he’s realizing how sucky dances really are and is about to beg us to come pick him up.”

He snorted. “Yeah. Poor kid.”

Y/N typed out a quick “we just finished dinner and are heading to the antique place now. lmk if i need to pick him up earlier” and tucked her phone away in her purse. As much as she resented it, she couldn’t help but wish that Draco wanted to join them instead.

“Are you guys ready to beat it and hit up that antique place?” Marvin, Sylvia’s date, asked. She rolled her eyes and sent him a lazy smile.

“You sound like a dad.” 

“Off like a herd of turtles, baby,” Y/N offered, gathering her things as they made their way out the restaurant door. “Not gonna lie, this place doesn’t show up on Google Maps or anything. I think I know how to get there but none of you guys are allowed to make fun of me if I take too many wrong turns.”

“No promises,” said Chad, winking down at her and giving her shoulder a little squeeze. 

 As they walked, it became profoundly obvious that Chad and Y/N were the only two who weren’t officially an item. Lizzy and Jonathon were walking hand in hand while Sylvia and Marvin whispered in each others’ ears when they had to wait for crosswalk signals. While she had great chemistry with Chad, nothing ever felt real with him. It always felt like an act.

Perhaps the tension between them was because of that one time they kissed and never talked about it again in freshman year after a particularly nerve wracking competitive math round before she quit--something that she wasn’t exactly going to shout off the rooftops for the masses to hear. Or maybe because he pushed her away right after and said it was a mistake. 

Whatever it was, Y/N and Chad were decidedly not romantically involved. She had been shocked when he’d even bothered asking her for the night. Granted, they were always pals and it shouldn’t have been awkward, but drawing the comparisons between her and the other girls was making the evening very uncomfy. Y/N couldn’t help but pray that Chad was going to be the one to break the ice.

“Where the fuck is this place?” he finally said, much to Y/N’s glee. His grace and manners were absolutely unparalleled. “It’s cold and I’m sure it’s going to start raining again.”

“It should be just a few more blocks and then to the right,” she responded. “Sorry. It’s cool as fuck, though. I promise it’s worth it.”

“This is just her ploy to lure us all away from civilization to off us,” Sylvia said, turning around from a few feet in front of them to raise her eyebrows at Y/N. “Eliminate the competition before college apps even begin. I’m impressed, honestly.”

“Now you’ve gone and ruined it all,” she fired back. “Thanks, Vy.”

She was relieved to see that the antique store couldn’t be missed, even if she tried. The sign, a worn and friendly gold, was illuminated by large lights. The words “My Grandfather’s Attic” had never looked more welcoming as Sylvia gripped the door and ushered them inside.

The moment Y/N stepped inside, something felt...different, kind of like the hair-raising feeling she got when she was around Draco. The electricity in the air she felt with him could easily be explained away by the fact that he was, for lack of a better term, the most stunning person she’d ever seen, but perhaps she was slowly getting over him. Perhaps…

She turned to see Chad, his honey blonde hair spilling over his forehead as he focused on a basket of vintage buttons that seemed to glimmer in the light. The furrow in his brow--the same one that she’d been so familiar with after seeing him solve countless math problems--appeared as he examined the basket, turning a red button around in his fingers, soft and and sprinkled with writing calluses. 

Maybe it had been Chad all along. Maybe Draco was just a detour. 

Before she did anything she regretted, Y/N turned and made her way back into the store. The set up was the same as she remembered--interesting and foreign objects hanging from the walls, ceilings, and congregating in baskets and overflowing shelves. She didn’t even realize that she had migrated over to the opposite side of the room until she felt the solid, cool wood of the black box from her dreams pressed into her hand as she turned it over and traced the strange white sign that was etched into the front. 

“Y/N!” 

The sound snapped her out of her trance to see...Heather and Draco? He was jogging towards her despite the fact that he was wearing a full suit. Y/N made an absent note to make fun of him later. 

“Why are you--”

“Put that down!” He stopped a few paces away, his eyes darting around the store at a frantic pace. “We need to leave.”

“Why? Honestly, if you wanted me to pick you up, all you had to do was…” She had to take a breath to steady herself. Her body felt like it was filled with static. “All you had to do was ask.”

“That’s not...ok, just put it down,” he commanded. “Please. Just put the box down. We need to go home.”

“No! This is my last homecoming. I’m sorry your experience wasn’t great, but I don’t...I don’t, uh, appreciate…” The lightheadedness hit, so suddenly that she almost fell. 

“Fuck, are you okay?” Draco was right in front of her in an instant, his eyes scanning her face.

“I feel...” She took a shaky breath. “I feel...starry?”

The last thing she remembered was Draco trying to tug the box out of her grip, his other hand warm on her shoulder.

And then everything went black.

final a/n: so draco got a howler and some wack stuff happened, huh? tell me what you think. 

[iidascalves]

New transfer (Momo x F! reader)

Hello!!! Lately I’ve been in my gay feels so I wrote this up. After seeing Momo in the most recent chapter, I couldn’t resist. I LOVE HER!! Anyway, I hope everyone is good haha. If there’s something you’d like to see please send me an ask :) I kind of liked writing this so if I’m bored in the future I might do a part two.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

The cold air of September ran through the station, getting chillier as your train eased to a stop. You played your music and shuffled onto the train along with other commuters. The plastic of your phone case only insulated the heat on your clammy palms. You were haunted by anxiety and anticipation for your arrival at UA.

You were a transferring from another, less popular hero school in the Ito prefecture. The reason for your transfer was that both your teachers and parents believed that UA would better suit your education needs. You were not only top of the class, but also in possession of a very powerful quirk that you developed and honed at an incredible pace.

Your quirk was essentially the ability to manipulate metal. You called it ‘metal’ and chose the hero name ‘Hardware’. Your quirk was useful not only in an urban setting but almost anywhere. If there is a substance that is classified as a metal, you have control of it. Because of your quirk, you took the UA entrance exam by storm. Your parents first recommended this transfer when you showed them you could move the iron in your blood. You made one of your fingers turn blue in order to show them your new trick. Instead of impressed reactions and praise you were met with fear. Despite how much they loved and cared for you, they couldn’t help but fear what they weren’t ready to understand.

Their unwillingness to adapt to change also prompted you to avoid coming out to them. You knew you liked girls. And that was something you were okay with keeping to yourself, for now.

You pulled out an earbud to listen to what stop was approaching. You recognized the name and got ready to depart. You loved your phone and headphones into your backpack and clenched the straps. You couldn’t remember the last time you were this nervous.

The new term started a week ago. Despite the work they sent you, you would still be behind on lessons. You had no idea who your classmates were and if they would even like you. Probably not. Would you get bullied? Are the other kids stronger than you? Will you be the weakest? Was this a mistake?

Your thoughts swarmed as you were carried off the train by the crowd of commuters. Before starting up the sidewalk you took an envelops out of your bag. It contained your class information, directions, and your UA student ID. You stuffed the envelope under your arm and booked it to UA. You were told to get there early so the teacher could give you a run down of things. You tried to focus on your surroundings instead of your worries.

Before long you could see looming blue archway. The gold letters ‘UA’ glittered in the early morning sun.  You spotted three figures waiting for you at the enterance. Curiosity caused your footsteps to quicken.

The three spotted you as you approached and one came barreling towards you in a terrifying speed walk. “You must be our new classmate. Please allow me to introduce myself! My name is Iida Tenya and I am the class president of class 1-A.” His booming voice and large stature made you flinch. “I look forward to working with you!” He did a rigid bow to you and straightened up immediately. You swallowed tensely before carefully replying.

“My name is (L/n) (F/n). I look forward to working with you.” After you returned his bow your eyes moved to the other two figures accompanying him. There was a ragged looking man who seemed severely sleep deprived. You recognized him as the hero Eraserhead.

The sight to his right made your breath hitch. She was easily one of the most beautiful girls you had ever seen. She already was smiling at you kindly. Her dark eyes twinkled in an inviting and charming way. Her hands were folded in front of her, resting on her skirt. You could hardly take your eyes off her. Your heart kept as her melodic voice flowed from her welcoming smile.

“My name is Yaoyorozu Momo. I’m the vice- president of class 1-A.” She bent at the waist to give you an elegant bow. “I’m looking forward to getting to know you.” Her posture returned to the polished way she was standing before. You wiped your damp palms on your skirt and took a sharp inhale of courage.

“(L/n) (F/n).” You returned her bow as a way to hide the blush on your cheeks. “Thank you for your warm welcome.” Upon straightening back up you were greeted with her bright smile. You were planning on staring at it forever when Eraserhead spoke up.

“We spoke through e-mails but we haven’t been formally introduced. I’m Aizawa. I’ll be your teacher.” His posture was relaxed. With his hands in his pockets and his posture slouched. “Yaoyorozu will give you a tour of the dorms tomorrow when you move in. Today we will introduce you to campus and the rest of your classmates.”

“Thank you, Sensei.” You bowed to him and he nodded in return.

“Let’s get into the school. Other students should be getting here soon.” Aizawa started towards the elaborate building and left you, Tenya, and Momo to trail behind. Your head tilted up to gaze at the full height of the massive school building.

————————————————————

“Class. As you’ve noticed we have gained a new student. We’ll do quick introductions and then get into classwork.”

Aizawa shuffled from behind the podium and retreated to his desk. Upon sitting down he draped a yellow sleeping bag around his shoulders and watched you walk up the isle to the podium. The eyes of your classmates made your cheeks ignite. Your sweaty hands gripped the sides of the podium as you tried to find a way to speak through the knot in your throat. You scanned your new surrounding and met the eyes of Yaoyorozu. Her soft smile melted your worries. There was something so calming about her presence that even a look from her provided you with assurance.

“My name is (L/n) (F/n). I’m originally from the Ito prefecture but transferred here after the first semester of my old school. I look forward to meeting you all.” You have a small bow to your new classmates.

“What’s your quirk?” Your eyes snapped to the blonde haired guy in the back who practically growled the question at you.

“I can manipulate metal.” You weren’t sure how to respond. This seemed to satisfy the angry bastard.

“Sounds weak.” He slouched further into his seat and smirked. Tenya swiveled in his chair and outfield a stiff hand towards the boy.

“Bakugou- kun. Please have some respect for our new peer.” Tenya seemed tense. Was this guy always this exsausting?

“Just calling em’ like I see em’.” He shifted his slumped posture. You didn’t care what else he had to say and made your way to your seat. “Not even gonna argue.” He muttered.

You heard the noise of a small shuffle as Momo turned in her seat towards Bakugou. “How do you know her quirk is weak if you’ve never seen her in action?”. Momo waited for a reply.

Bakugou scoffed and looked out the window. Momo pointed herself forward. She then turned to you and you gave each other a bright smile.

After she faced the board once again you felt your face turn red. ‘That was…. kind of hot…’ You thought to yourself.

Your heart fluttered over the image of her smile as it replayed in your head the rest of the class period.

Once the bell rang, you knew lunch was next on the schedule. Due to your anxiety of the first day, you had memorized your schedule. You picked your bag up from the floor and scooted your chair out. A small elbow appeared on your desk. A classmate was leaning on your desk, head propped up on his elbow. His smug face was accompanied by greasy purple hair that looked like balls stuck to his head.

“Can I help you?” You asked. He kept eyeing you. You rose from your seat and slung your bag over your shoulder.

“Looking for a boyfriend? Don’t worry about not being my type. I like all kinds of girls.” He winked at you. You felt your face contort with disgust.

You were so appalled all you could muster out was “Ew.” Your response brought tears to his eyes and he retreated to the back of the classroom.

“Oh, (L/n)-san. Don’t mind him.” You heard Momo’s angelic voice from beside you. “Want to come eat with me an some of the girls? I’ll introduce you to them better.” Her radiant smile gave you no option but to say yes.

“Yeah! I’d love to. Thanks Yaoyorozu -san.” You gave her your best smile.

————————————————————

After a long first day, you had to go home and rest up for your move- in day. You still had to try to remember everyone’s names.

Because of your unfamiliarity with the area, you still had out your directions from this morning.

“(L/n)-san!” Your head turned to the source. It was Momo. “How was your first day?” She fell into step beside you.

“It went much better than I expected. You were a huge help, of course.” You noticed her cheeks held a hint of pink and her face wore an excited smile.

“It’s the least I could do! It’s part of my role as the vice- president, after all. Did you enjoy meeting the others?”

You had not only met the girls during lunch but a few of the guys as well. Many were kind enough to come up and say hello. Kirihsima and Shoji offered to do the heavy lifting for you tomorrow. And the girls promised you a welcome dinner with boardgames and a movie.

“Everyone is so nice. Thanks for introducing me.” Her smile grew warmer and she slowed to a stop. You paused and stood beside her.

“I’m so glad your first day went well. I’ll give you my number in case you need anything.” She fisted around in her backpack for a slop of paper and scribbled her number. She held it out to you and met your eyes with a warm smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow for your move in day. I have to head back to the dorms now.”

“Thanks for your help, Yaoyorozu- san.” The paper was clenched gently in your fist as you smiled at the beautiful girl in front of you.

“Please call me Momo!” She waved her hand as to say ‘no big deal’. She made your heart flutter.

“Sure thing! And please call me (y/n).” You stood for a second, just beaming at each other. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Momo.”

“See you tomorrow, (y/n).” While waving goodbye, you watched her turn around and walk further onto campus to the dorms. A wave of happy excitement flew through your body in anticipation of seeing her again.

[formulatrash]

What are your thoughts on fanfic writing in the f1 fandom? I am pretty sure I saw you tweet about it at some point something small but I was too scared to interact with you on it over at twitter :D

So, this is a hotter topic than I’d really like it to be on my Tumblr and it’s my own fault but. Here we go.

RPF has some questionable ethics and some even more questionable origins. I’m ancient enough that it just used to get straight-up published as a ‘5 minute fantasy’ in young women and girls’ magazines where you’d get like, some 15 year old’s daydream about meeting a boyband member on holiday and falling in love and this was for some reason just treated as an absolutely normal bit of publishing not like ‘what the hell, that would be illegal’ and ‘why is this the fantasy we are encouraging girls to have as an ambition when it comes to sports or even pop success’ and y’know. 

Anyway, the 90s: really can’t emphasise enough how fucking weird having only a few sources to get your media from makes them.

Back to RPF; its roots are in political obscenity, if you want to talk about the bawdy stuff. The French Revolution, in particularly, wrote lots of erotica (the kinkier the better) about the royal family as part of refusing to acknowledge their divine rights under the church. It was an anarchical refusal to accept the situation as it was and to undermine it. 

Beyond that you’ve got historical fiction - Thucydides was all about working up a really good narrative take* on the Peloponnesian war back in the fifth century BC. Extra scenes, big dialogue, you know. If he’d known about self-lubricating buttholes then you BET Herodotus would have put them in the Histories.

Point is: writing fiction about real people isn’t really that weird, Shakespeare did a load of it. But we tend to problematise RPF and consider it strange, even amongst fanfiction.

Now, to 21st century sports and specifically F1. We speak here on Tumblr dot com, the audience where F1 fans skew most largely LGBT, non-cis and female or non binary rather than every other platform which is full of cis het men. Here is where we talk about fanfic. Because they don’t know we’re here, I assume, is the logic.

(they kinda don’t, to be fair)

Most of us do not see ourselves in sports. Most sports media is not aimed at the way that a lot of us were socialised to engage with stuff and most of us - lucky buggers like me aside - do not get to write the narratives of the way sport is engaged with or talked about or who does it. 

A lot of us who live here on god’s abandoned internet have drifted in and out of fandoms and a lot of that will have involved engaging with fanfiction. Fanfiction is a really fun sandbox to play in, as an adult - we get told to stop playing, as we grow up and it’s no surprise that we still want to. 

There’s a six monthly cycle of some AAA game that asks the question “is shooting people bad?” that prompts 10 broadsheet newspaper pieces on Videogames: Not Just For Kids Anymore (and sub in comics/superheroes/etc for games there) that makes everyone who knows that roll their eyes. Games and comics and superheroes are big, legitimised industries now that turnover hundreds of billions of dollars.

Fanfiction is an outlier, as the purest form of play in a lot of senses. Unfettered, it’s the democratic media platform; there’s no minimum standard for publishing, there’s no real limits beyond your own ethics on what you can publish. it doesn’t turn a profit, by its very definition and it allows lots of games and versions of itself within that. 

For something with a ludicrously broad definition that encapsulates hugely different types of works, it has defined forms; from drabbles to wingfic, as structural formats, we also recognise fluff or hurt/comfort as genre. Fanfiction isn’t really the thing itself, it’s the bookshop and what you find in it will vary on where you look and often, the advice of the bookseller or friends you speak to.

If you’ve enjoyed wandering that bookstore and adding to its shelves as part of the way you engage with media and then you come to a sports fandom? Well, you’re gonna look for the fic. If you don’t see yourself in the sport, as a woman or a queer person then you can write yourself in. It’s sad that we sideline the fantasies where we exist - given they’re entirely normal to have - into places where we jealously guard them away from the reality we daren’t intrude on but that is how it is.

And fuck: if your whole reason for liking F1 is cus you wanna marry a driver and you’re writing those 15 minute fantasies about them like you’re 15 and they’re a poster then it’s not doing any harm - it’s a lot healthier than stalking them. You might even work out what you really want or more things about yourself, in the process.

(if it’s ‘to marry an F1 driver’ then I suggest you take some boring swimwear snaps somewhere that looks expensive, stick ‘em on Insta and wait for the DM slide)

One of the things I like best in fanfic is the possibility of a queer narrative without complications, of telling queer stories without having to justify them as Issues, of letting us see ourselves and our own awakenings because fuck, you know the big book shop (if such things still exist) has one shelf of expensive, niche published novels you find difficult to related to and three sex ed books.

F1 fanfic was one of the ways I wandered back to the F1 fandom and one of the reasons I work in the industry now. It was enough of an in to make me want to really think, to have that new crush energy of obsession and enjoyment, about motorsport in a way I’d drifted away from as I felt sidelined from the sport through my early-to-mid 20s. I found brocedes much more compelling, as an interpretation and a way of processing the intense rivalry between Lewis and Nico - even knowing it was fictional conjecture - than I did the equally fictional conjecture about their psychological states and potential weaknesses published in the sports papers.

So, yes, I have read some excellent Formula 1 RPF. I have written some frankly mediocre and in retrospect very poorly edited F1 RPF that I posted to Twitter in a drunken moment of excitement because I was happy I’d finished it and forgot, idk. I have a tricky relationship to being a Notable Person I guess, I hadn’t intended any harm and was mostly worried I’d get flack from the industry. Lol. Anyway, only saying it cus like; this isn’t just me talking about things theoretically.

There’s a lot of F1 RPF that is more insightful than a lot of columns about ‘inside the drivers’ minds’ working off very little more than the RPF is.

Some of it, I won’t lie, I find really fucking weird but I guess like, that ain’t for me. There are a lot of problems with RPF - it’s too male, too frequently misogynist, too keen to reinforce homophobic ideas, too often white and blonde, not radical enough but those issues are for the advanced class rather than the 101 overview I was aiming for here and go well beyond F1 or RPF.

Shit I should be writing the weather report. Fuck. I’m the worst. Err, there you go, that’s a whole thing.

(I don’t read very much - I am busy af - but occasionally and especially on long haul flights when the idea of anything other than soothing is impossible)

*Actually tbh Thucydides couldn’t write for fuck but it was early and you know how when a tag’s young you’ll read a lot of mediocre stuff?

[littlespoonevan]

Hi! I love your fics so much, they're so cute!!! I was wondering if you could write about Mickey's reaction to Ian's Monica tattoo and/or his black hair in prison? Hope you have a great day!

first of all, thank you :’)) and askdjlhf god i am so wEAK for anything involving their prison reunion!!! this kind of devolved from hair talk to relationship talk in the middle lmao but hopefully you still like it!!

(also just a head’s up: i’m not gonna be accepting anymore prompts at the moment bc i really want to clear out the ones i already have so i can start on my long fic. i hope people don’t mind!!!)

*

Ian had really believed he’d never see Mickey again.Ian had really believed prison would be the end of him. Ian had really believeda lot of things until his cell door had opened and Mickey Milkovich was suddenlystanding in front of him, here to save him from himself one last time.

After the initial reunion – the delicate kiss thathad turned hurried until Mickey reluctantly reminded him the window to theircell wasn’t exactly one-sided – they stay on Mickey’s bunk. To be honest, thisposition is no less compromising than what they’d been doing ten minutes agobut Ian isn’t quite prepared to have Mickey out of his reach just yet. Mickey’shalf-sitting, half-laying down as he sticks to his original spot leaningagainst the pillow while Ian sits slouched with his back against the wall andhis right leg pressed up against Mickey’s.

“The fuck is with all this anyway?” Mickey asks whenthere’s a momentary lull in their conversation, hand reaching up to scrubthrough Ian’s hair.

“Oh.” Ian blushes and ducks his head to stare down athis hands. “Guess I didn’t wanna draw attention to myself.”

Mickey raises his eyebrows and his mouth curves up ina smile and it’s such a familiar look Ian feels like fucking crying. He neverthought he’d see Mickey look like that again.

“You know your eyebrows don’t really match your hair,”Mickey comments then, snickering when Ian hits his leg half-heartedly.

“You got a better idea?” Ian grumbles, leaning hishead back against the wall to meet Mickey’s gaze.

“Yeah, don’t get fuckin’ arrested for blowing up avan.”

Ian winces, feeling shame burn through him, but thenMickey’s reaching out and taking his hand. He runs his thumb over the skin ofIan’s knuckles and Ian watches Mickey watch their hands for a minute.

“What the fuck happened, Ian?” Mickey asks softly,finally raising his gaze to meet Ian’s.

Ian shrugs uncomfortably and squeezes Mickey’s handtight in his own to ground himself. “Stopped taking my meds,” he admits quietly.“No one really noticed until it was too late, I guess.”

“What d’you mean no one noticed?” Mickey asks and helooks pissed but not at Ian, he doesn’t think.

Ian shrugs again. “I guess I seemed okay for the mostpart and people had other shit going on. The whole Gay Jesus thing, it gotoutta control pretty quickly.”

“What about that guy you were seeing?” Mickey askssuddenly and Ian hates the reminder of Trevor, hates that Mickey even had toknow about him.

“He’d never seen me manic before,” Ian says. “Guesshe didn’t know what signs to look for.”

“I didn’tknow what signs to look for,” Mickey snaps – again, he doesn’t direct it at Ianbut more the situation at large. “Fuck, you weren’t even diagnosed back then,there was no fuckin’ medication for you to be taking and I knew something waswrong. I knew-“

Mickey cuts himself off abruptly, huffing out afrustrated breath and Ian squeezes his hand again, tugging on it just a bit toget Mickey to look at him.

“You would’ve known this time too,” Ian murmurs. “Iknow you would’ve. It’s okay, it’s my fault you weren’t there. Not yours.”

Mickey doesn’t argue with him or disagree, just sitsup a little straighter and moves himself closer into Ian’s space. “You feelokay now?”

Ian nods earnestly. “I’m stable,” he promises. “Haven’tmissed a dose since I sorted my shit out.”

“Good,” Mickey replies, low and half-mumbled.

“And for what it’s worth,” Ian continues, leaningforward to bump his forehead against Mickey’s before returning to his originalspot. “Me and Trevor are done. I tried to make myself want him again after-after you. But it didn’t really work. My heart wasn’t in it.”

Mickey looks at him, eyes darting all over Ian’s facelike he’s trying to read him for answers. Ian lets him look, drinks in thesight of Mickey before him and reminds himself this is real.

“We should talk about it,” Mickey says finally, eyesflitting to their hands and back up again. “Just- we can wait a couple ofhours.”

Ian nods and smiles because he gets it. They have amountain of shit to work through, probably as far back as the second timeMickey got out of juvie, if they’re being honest, and he knows being stuck in thesame room for the foreseeable future is the perfect excuse to finally do it.But…they just got each other back. And it seems like Mickey wants to bask inthe reunion just as much as he does.

“How’d you find out about me anyway?” Ian asks becausehe hasn’t yet and while Mickey’s always seemed to have a sixth sense aboutknowing when Ian’s in trouble and always seems to show up at exactly the righttime, this one feels a little beyond the realm of possibility.

Mickey shrugs and this time he’s the one who looksembarrassed. “Some kid in Mexico had a shirt with your face on it. I asked himabout it.”

Ian can’t believe that. Can’t believe Mickey wouldrisk everything – the new life he’d built, his freedom, his safety – just to come back here and bewith Ian. But he supposes he should. Back in the early days all Ian had wantedwas some kind of proof that Mickey loved him, that he wanted to stay. Now- thisis quite possibly the biggest love declaration he could’ve made.

“We can talk about that shit later too,” Mickey saysthen, brushing Ian’s thoughts away with a wave of his hand. “What we reallyneed to discuss now,” he continues, hand snaking up the back of Ian’s neckuntil his fingers are tangled in Ian’s hair, “is what the fuck we’re gonna doabout your hair.”

Ian barks out a laugh. “You miss the red?”

Mickey gives him an exasperated look that’s verypointedly not a denial. “You might have to go back to your buzzcut days, army.”

Ian grins at the old nickname and doesn’t protestwhen Mickey uses the hand on the back of his head to guide him closer.

“But then you can’t put your hands in my hair,” Ianpoints out teasingly. Tugging on Ian’s hair has always been one of Mickey’sweaknesses and judging by the look on his face, it still is.

Mickey seems to weigh his options for a moment beforehis nods decisively. “I can deal for a few weeks.”

Ian’s grin is so wide he thinks his face is going tosplit in two as he shakes his head. “You’re so full of shit.”

Mickey scoffs. “So I gotta type, sue me.” He’ssmirking at Ian now, fingers massaging the back of Ian’s scalp and it’s just-it’s the combination of the teasing and the comfort. It’s everything Ian needsand exactly what makes him lean in to kiss Mickey again, current environment bedamned.

Mickey kisses him back anyway, soft and sweet, andlets his forehead linger against Ian’s for a moment when they break apart.

They’re both quiet for a beat but then Mickey leansback. “Seriously though, first thing in the morning. We’re getting you a razor.”

Ian laughs and thinks the next two years of his lifesuddenly sound a lot more bearable.

*

[princessplantasaurus]

Sponge AU Masterlist (for drabble requests and more!)

Alright so I literally just realized that I’m out here asking people for drabble prompts and vaguely mentioning my AUs but...a lot of newer sponge followers found me after the proshot and therefore weren’t around for these AUs?? So here is a masterlist of my Sponge AUs! I’m currently accepting any and all drabble prompts for any and all of these AUs and I’m also willing to answer questions or give some headcanons about them should anyone be curious! I’m also willing to do AUs of these AUs, such as, say a soulmate AU taking place in one of the AUs listed below, for example. 1. Regular Humanized Musical AU Basically exactly what it says on the tin. Based on the musical, all the characters are/appear human. Wrote quite a bit for this before, can be found here. 2. Regular Humanized Musical AU except Karen’s a robot Same as above, except while everyone else is a human, Karen appears human but is a robot. Sheldon built her originally as an assistant for his (then) new restaurant, and somewhere along the way she developed romantic feelings that she never expected him to return (but obviously, he did). Typically a little more angsty or in the hurt/comfort genre than the regular humanized musical au, often drabbles took place much before the musical, in the early days of Plankton and Karen’s relationship. Wrote quite a few of these, can be found here.

3. College AU Ah yes, the one that started it all. Basically a humanized college AU but this was the main one I wrote for. There was a fic posted on ao3 and also several drabbles. First year student Edward started at college in Bikini Bottom with his high school boyfriend as his roommate. When his roommate cheats on him during frosh week, he eventually works up the nerve to request a move. He ends up rooming with fellow first year students Bobby and Patrick, who were best friends from day one. Bobby works at an on-campus restaurant as fry cook, and eventually gets Edward a job as cashier, replacing Sheldon, the former best friend of their student manager, a fourth year student named Eugene Krabs.  Eugene and Sheldon were best friends since elementary school, and went to the same college with the plan of graduating with degrees in business and food science and opening their own restaurant together. When Sheldon stated dating Karen, however, it through a wrench in their friendship. Eugene knocking up his girlfriend and now having to worry about being a father on top of graduating and managing the restaurant has put a lot of stress on him. Meanwhile, Sandy Cheeks, a first year student, just got kicked out of the sorority she only got into since she was the daughter of an alumni. There’s so much more I could say about this AU since this AU is the most “my baby” of all of them but I’ll leave it at this. 3a. Coffee Shop AU An AU of the College AU that featured Bobby as the campus’ resident barista, who deemed himself cafe cupid as he tried to pair up both Sheldon and Karen, and Perch and Edward. Wrote a small handful of things that can be found here. 4. Battle of the Bands AU Team of Tres, 3 twenty something best friends (Bobby, Patrick and Sandy) who have been playing as a pop rock band for a few years, and are finally entering the Bikini Bottom Battle of the Bands, where the winner gets signed to a major label. They think they have it in the bag, until they realize last year’s runners up, Chum Bucket, who toured with the Electric Skates as their opening act, are back to compete again. Chum Bucket is a duo, fronted by leading man vocalist Sheldon Plankton, who considers himself a bisexual sex god rock star and likes to maintain this image, often bringing fans backstage to make out with them. Doing literally everything else for Chum Bucket is the second member, Karen, who writes, produces, and arranges all their songs, while also live mixing and DJing behind Sheldon during sets. What no one knows is Sheldon and Karen have actually been dating for close to 10 years, something they’ve been keeping secret in order for Sheldon to keep up his ‘image’ with the fan base. Feeling the need to add a little extra edge to the band, Bobby recruits Pearl, the teenage daughter of his day job’s manager, after hearing her sing one day and realizing she’s a better lead vocalist than he’d ever be. Pearl’s dad doesn’t exactly KNOW they’re doing this. And why, pray tell, is Bobby’s next door neighbor always complaining about their music? What could Edward possibly know about music, anyway? (When I was initially going to write this as a fic I kept Edward’s role in this a secret and tbh I still kinda want to unless someone requests a drabble prompt that involves his involvement.)   I did write a little bit for this au, all of which can be found here. And now onto the stuff I never got around to writing! 5. Monsters and Aliens AU This one’s gonna be vague as hell because this started as a vague pitch of “Spongebob Universal Monsters AU” that me and my friend Bella kept snowballing in DMs (specifically while I was in the stock room at the place I worked at the time one day, I remember this vividly for some reason??). So basically you got Sheldon who’s a vampire, Sandy who’s a weresquirrel, Squidward as a Phantom of the Opera type, and Patrick who’s a Frankenstien’s Monster type. They are all basically being held in a house arrest type situation, free to live in their little house on the outskirts of town but not wanted by Bikini Bottom as a society since they’ve all wreaked havoc on the town before. Spongebob is town’s local hero kid. Ever since he was young, his upbeat unbreakable positivity and unwavering stick-to-it-iveness have been utilized by the town to stop disaster, including sending him to save them from the monsters multiple times. When a race of alien robots invade and threaten to not just destroy and conquer Bikini Bottom, but the world, the town decides it’s best to send the monsters at them like a little monster army. Spongebob, worried for his monster friends,  decides to spearhead this process so that he can help them plan and train. (Karen is also involved in this AU, as one of the alien robots who “defects” to the “good side” because Plankton “sucessfully” “secudes” her, but that’s a whole separate side tangent)  6. Girl Group AU I LITERALLY FORGOT THIS EVEN EXISTED UNTIL I WAS GOING THROUGH OLD DMs AND IT CAME FLOODING BACK TO ME. Sandy, Pearl and Karen started as a group of high school friends posting videos of themselves singing on YouTube who eventually got big enough to be signed to a major label. Sandy is the lead vocalist and doesn’t really want to BE a musician anymore. Singing was fun when it was just a side hobby she did with two of her friends, but she hates the fame and doesn’t want to pursue music as a career. She’d really rather dedicate her life to science, but she doesn’t want to ruin things for Pearl and Karen Pearl is the youngest (was 15 when they started making videos as opposed to Sandy and Karen who were almost 17) and feels like she’s constantly stuck in Sandy’s shadow. Wants to prove to the world (and her dad) that she’s more than just Sandy’s back up singer. Karen writes all the songs and mostly stays out of the spotlight. Has highkey been sleeping with their manager since day one, despite Sheldon claiming he treats all of his clients equally and doesn’t play favorites. (should be noted that Karen and Sandy were 19ish by the time they were signed and Sheldon would’ve been 20 or 21 since I picture him as an intern who got to surpass his mentor by finding and signing ‘the next big thing’ so like...the Sheldon/Karen relationship is at a healthy age difference don’t get that twisted) But yeah those are the AUs!! And I may think of more!! But I’m back in Sponge mode and want to write more drabbles so feel free to send literally anything into my inbox!! It can be just a little idea of your own, and I’ll also be reblogging starter prompts a few times a week if you’d rather send something from one of those! Feel free to specify an AU! Or not and I’ll pick the one I’m feeling! But thank you very much to everyone who read this monstrosity of a post I owe you my life.

[faejilly]

I was tagged by @la-muerta​ & @facialteeth​ & @thedivinemissema​ for the WIP/Title Game

rules: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. send me an ask with the title that most intrigues you and interests you and i’ll post a little snippet of it or tell you something about it!

AND THEN  by @shadoedseptmbr​ @msviolacea​ & @ravenclawnerd​ for the “stories you want to write... but for some reason haven’t yet”

so this will be a mish-mash of both? The WIPs will mostly have blurbs in this case (to fit the second meme) but you are still welcome to ask follow-up questions, if you’d like ;) Assuming you make it through the list, it is uh. Not Short.

Anyone who would like to play with their WIPs, please consider yourself tagged in either or both of these. :D

Misc Fic Folder:

“untitled document” - where I’m working on fictober fills so I have word-counts for my GYWO tracker. I am not working on these because Brains Are Dumb and also Going Back To Work Is Exhausting

I made a file called “YULETIDE!” which has nothing in it but I’m determined to finish this year so that is definitely technically a thing in the Unending WIP List of Doom worth mentioning. (Tho obviously that’s all I could say even if I had started, because anonymous.)

“coda-fics, rewatch!” -yes, that exclamation mark is important! it’s to keep me motivated! (it didn’t work). Much like untitled, this is for putting stuff so I can do word count tracking even if I don’t know what I’m doing. Currently I think it just says “MARYSE” because I was working on my SH 1x6 coda-fic and then got distracted and haven’t typed anything up yet. (Yay notebooks? Boo notebooks? Not even sure at this point.)

WNIP (works not in progress) Folder:

“TOG” - I had one vivid mental image of how Nicky & Joe met (blood-stained evil smiles?) but then no idea for a follow-up story and also the fandom is insane and I’m not sure I want to deal with all of *gestures vaguely* all that

“Shan Xia Notes” -for a TTRPG that never quite got off the ground; she was a semi-tragic selkie who was still in love with the evil queen/lady who stole her skin and I got to play her for like one session and she was surprisingly chaotic neutral, which wasn’t at all what I’d been expecting. But the game never really got off the ground, so I never had enough info to really delve into writing backstory fic

“post-Kruschev” -Kruschev’s List was the last episode of Scarecrow & Mrs King, and I was debating writing an epilogue in place of the s5 we never got, to try and tie up some loose ends, but the fandom’s three old-ladies in trench coats and I never quite worked up the gumption to get it anywhere

“Code Realize warm as silk sequel” -there is literally nothing in this file except “SEX! Only a little angst” because I wanted to write some “we can’t actually touch each other” smut but never actually did. 🤷‍♀️

BioWare (also all Not-In-Progress Anymore)

“seb/adelaide”, “Theia” & “DAI Erana” -these WIP folders were cannibalized for ficlets for the last few times I did fictober, and while originally I had ideas for longer epilogues for all three of them, at this point I don’t think any of the remaining bits could support a story any longer.

”whispers in the dark” -Maia Ryder never really got much fic at all; the cancellation of any further Andromeda stuff was really disheartening, and at this point I’d have to play the game again, and I don’t think I’m gonna manage that any time soon

”TSP” -a Mass Effect 3 Shepard AU collab project that kind of went off the rails, and our mutual brains/lives never quite seem to line up so we can try and rebuild it ”Ngaio & Tane” -my one truly ruthless Shepard (Alliance background, who romanced Traynor) whose father Tane Shepard was, I think, in PsyOps, and I wanted to figure out their complicated relationship but never really did know where I was going with it

”JE Zu & Yaling” -so I’ve rambled about my Tragic Sagacious Zu Romance Thoughts regarding Jade Empire more than once (#Icy Yaling should have most of it) but apparently I want to yell about it more than I want to actually write it? Whoops.

”CI sequel: 5 times fic?” -Cruel Intentions is a kinkmeme fill that I started and then it sat for like five years before I actually finished it, and I liked the ending, but it does leave a giant fucking question mark in terms of how those people got from there to where they are after the game, and I kind of wanted to write a proper h/c fic rather than just... leaving them wallowing in all that trauma?

But I didn’t. I don’t even remember for sure how I wanted to frame the 5/1 of it all, besides it being something sad about allowing people to see you or touch you in some way. (Prayers maybe, since I think there was definitely some Sebastian & Fenris & faith stuff going on in there.)

“candles” -Merribela prompt fill that I never was happy with? Not sure what I might do with it at this point, so it’s just sitting there all sad and lonely and neglected-like.

Shadowhunters

pt1: WIP LIST ONLY

“Persuasion” -so I keep trying to write Persuasion AUs in many fandoms because it’s my favorite Austen, but I think I like it too much, I have no real solid concept of how I’d transform it, and if I don’t have anything else to say about different characters within that framework, I have no push to actually write anything? Also this SH version of it suffered from MASSIVE scope creep when I started outlining and it got too big for me to handle so I like, killed it twice? Whoops. This one is really probably never gonna happen.

“oosdt sequel” -I wanted to write more about the Forest That Eats People and Magnus & Alec as Guardians Between Worlds, and also some background Magnus’ Found Family & Lightwood Family Feels (maybe some clizzy?) and I left a Madzie plot-thread dangling from the first one on purpose even but I think this one had too many ideas and not enough focus so it’s sort of sprawling all over a doc with a lot of “???” in it

“procedural-ish” -this was originally going to be a sex-farce. and then it turned more serious. and then maybe kind of copaganda which was uncomfortable in terms of the Everything That Is The News in 2020, and then maybe it was more a Mafia AU and at that point I had self-inflicted tone whiplash and I wished the voices in my head were a little more forthcoming about their plans so I stopped before I brained myself on my computer monitor in frustration.

“I had rather a rose than live forever” -I started a reverse!verse Malec (Shadowhunter!Magnus, High Warlock!Alec) for bingo last year, and I couldn’t quite get it together in time, so I made a moodboard inspired by the bits I’d started instead. I may see if one of my prompts from Bingo this year help me finish it?

“fall fright fest (practical magic  au)” -exactly what it says on the tin! almost exactly a year old & neglected! IDEK ANYMORE (I talked about this one with the WIP meme last time tho: here)

“priest!kink theology?” -I thought it was gonna be smut? I like priest!kink. I have made other people like it and yell at me even! But then I kept diverging into demon!Magnus thinking about Priest!Alec’s faith and as usual, IDEK ANYMORE *laughs*

(If they’re remotely canon-adjacent or divergent, a bunch of these are in here because I need to rewatch the show to get the pacing/timing/tone right and I haven’t, and I don’t know why, because I enjoy the show, but BRAINS! Are Dumb! So I guess that’s it?)

“I do” -I have tried to write this damnable Malec arranged marriage fic like six different times. I have signed up for fic exchanges and bangs with it, I have rewritten massive sections, trying to change tone or structure or POV or whatever, and it basically comes down to they like each other too fast and I keep not gutting it enough to get back to a useful pace, but by the time I realized that I was on take six and kind of sick of it. I may get back to it eventually

“wing!fic” -canon divergent in early s1, trying to deal with the consequences of Simon’s kidnapping as the Truly Serious Event that it should have been. It uh. Got heavier than I expected with those consequences (considering it was originally just supposed to be Alec’s wings flirting with Magnus) and also see above re: rewatching for pacing.

“2x20 aftermath/date night/pandemonium porn“ -yes that is the actual wip title. It used to be “spite fic” because I was originally inspired by fighting against a lot of fic!Alec characterization that was clearly based more on the books and ATG syndrome than the Alec in the show, which is the Alec I know and like and want to read about. BUT, pacing and etc. again, I think. Also I have somehow entirely lost my knack for writing porn, which makes it difficult to finish something originally intended to be smut!fic. Or even teasing almost!smut.

“rubbish heap” -so this is about three different fics that I realized complemented each other really well so they’re now all in the same file as I try to turn them into the sequel of “with an if in its soul”. It includes amnesia, parabatai lore shenanigans, a s3 rewrite, and some truly awful Owl adjustments that make me wince in horrified authorly delight and pain. BUT, as with the other ones in this file, the scope is large and I normally write short-fic and I kind of just threw up my hands in exasperation. I may have to break it back up into the three different fics instead, if I ever actually want to write it. Them? But also I need to take better notes on s3 to make sure I have what I need in here.

SH Pt 2: Started posting or not yet in hiatus because it’s actually almost ready to be a thing in the real world! maybe!?

“kisses (firsts)” -I actually started publishing this one, a “series of firsts” that was supposed to be kind of relationship milestones and kind of an excuse for smut, and then there wasn’t that much smut and I lost momentum and also dear lords & ladies the timeline is stupid, wtf. I may not ever add to this one, tbqh. It doesn’t stop in a terrible place, and they’re all ficlets so they stand alone all right.

“clizzy epilogue” -this is blank atm, it’s more a reminder for me to keep poking away at my “girls who can’t breathe air, only fire” collection BECAUSE I WOULD LIKE TO ACTUALLY GET TO THE CLIZZY AT SOME POINT

"mer!alec" -pts 2-4 of a series, but apparently having an actual plan gets in the way of me *writing* the thing, and I haven't managed to throw the half an outline far enough away from my brain to be able to write again. Or something like that.

"ibhww" -if broken hearts were whole is a soulmate fic I started a million years ago, and purposefully set aside to finish some other WIPs because I thought they'd be quick, and now it's just buried under two and a half years of regret and shame so it's hard to get back to it

"iafy" -i am for you is a delightful & frothy semi-epistolary fluff piece that also just lost momentum because Life & 2020 & etc. It's far and away the most popular thing I've ever posted on AO3, which also makes me feel weird sometimes, and I feel like the fact that there's no grand conclusion planned, just a bit more fluff and settling in, might end up being disappointing? Basically, it's the first time I think I've psyched myself out about reader expectations, and until I get over that I'm going to have trouble finishing the last couple chapters. (There really are probably only two more chapters though. IT’S SO CLOSE, I wish I could just... write it. And yet?)

“fake-hating” -I do not like fake dating as a trope that much, I just do not get it, but I love outside POVs and arranged marriages and there’s this delighful tumblr post about how they wished there was more fic about people who were together but had to pretend they werent’, and uh. This may be that? Eventually? I’m not exhausted by my failure to finish it yet, so it’s still in the regular folder rather than the hiatus folder, even though nothing’s been posted for it.

AND I THINK THAT’S IT?

Not as terrible as it could be, but still. MANY WORDS THAT MAY NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY. Posting the equivalent of one’s old ratty sketchbook is always a weird feeling. :D