#orchestra problems

[moochou-eats-paper]

please fucking do this. please.

splitting sections into two is actually a good idea and as someone who plays in a shitty junior orchestra (not that shitty, sorry, I’m being harsh), people would actually play the music instead of moving their bow up and down and relying on front row.

Hey can someone help me go back and time and ask who's fucking bright idea was it to stick all the bass and other low register instruments completely on the right fucking side of the theater with zero compensation on the other? RIP to the people on the left side I guess, fucking ridiculous here please enjoy my proposed solution

FUCK YEAH WAY BETTER

[goingoutofourminds]

the signs as things my orchestra director has said/done

Aries: this is a can-can, not a can-cannot.

Taurus: [stands on top of box, imitating shia labeouf] JUST DO IT.

Gemini: [talking to the double bass] this is what you sounded like just now. [projects screaming goat videos on the whiteboard]

Cancer: [signs everyone's field trip permission slips as 'l.v. beethoven']

Leo: IF YOU PLAY A C-NATURAL, YOU'LL MAKE JESUS CRY. DON'T MAKE JESUS CRY.

Virgo: YOU ARE NOT AMERICAN IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN STAR WARS.

Libra: [projects LOTR memes on the whiteboard during practice]

Scorpio: i want us to do the '1812 overture.' only instead of using cannons, we bring out the potato guns.

Sagittarius: [on the correct way to pronounce 'l'chaim'] IT NEEDS MORE PHLEGM.

Capricorn: 'sounding like butt' is actually a very highly technical musical term.

Aquarius: BE AS PASSIONATE ABOUT YOUR MUSIC AS THESE PEOPLE ARE. [projects 'gangnam style' on the whiteboard]

Pisces: [points dramatically at the first chair violin] LEMME 'SPLAIN YOU A THING.

[qwertyisqueen]

The One Who’s Behind the Slaughter???

context below

Context: My school’s orchestra has recently decided to split us based on skill level into two separate bands, each lead by one of our two directors. This wouldn’t be a problem, if tuba parts were actually divided based on skill and not seniority, but that doesn’t matter. (My teacher explicitly told us that tuba players were divided by seniority since we all have pretty much the same skill level) (Our skill level being ‘taught how to play the scales and thrust into playing full time’) (I used to play flute I don’t know how I got here)

For some reason, the band teacher that is in charge of the ‘easier band’ uses classical music for our warm ups, leading to nuggets of gold like this.

[regtheviolin]

I don't know the point of playing violin and bass anymore. I work so hard on a song and it's over in minutes. No one I know understands, all my classmates in orchestra do it cause of their parents and they don't care.

[rivenantiqnerd]

*cellos desperately running back to grab rockstops*

[spoonietimelordy]

Remembering that I have a ticket for a concert 40min before said concert starts. Oops

[cookinguptales]

entered into polite confrontation in public without getting too terribly flustered, I deserve a gold star

[thecornerofegg]

The biggest problems of being in choires and orchestras are that youll perpetually have the songs stuck in your head, and they will loop like in rehearsals when something just cant be gotten right and the conductor is spending 5 minutes on one phrase

Speaking from oh so much personal experience

EDIT: spending 5 minutes on one phrase is SUCH an understatement. More accurately it's 20 minutes on one and a half phrases

[loonylooly]

Um so me and my orchestra friends just personified our Violas (and we're working on our rosins) so far we have My viola, Vivienne, who's a...stoner opera singer? And then we have Vincenzo whos a very...booktok-y italian butcher..?? And then we have Vladamir and he's a Romanian poet?? Oh and Vincenzo and Vladamir are boyfriends. There's also Victor 1 and Victor 2 who coincidentally got named the same thing and they're both in a love triangle with Vivienne.

[cocatgaming12]

Okay I don’t know if this is just me but I listened to 3 O’clock Things and honestly the whole song gave me Neotheater vibes even though it’s an OK Orchestra song. From the lyrics taking a deeper look at actions from the past to the old timey sounding backing vocals to just the overall feel of the song. It gave Neotheater.

[loverboybrightsideghost]

i saw anastasiaaaaa 🥰🥰🥰👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🗣️🗣️🗣️🥳🥳🥳🥳

[pensivespacepirate]

(guy who is obsessed with eskew voice) wow this is just like i am in eskew

[orcelito]

-22F windchill is Pretty Chilly!! But I bundled right up, so I'm okay. My face doesn't like it, though. My lungs, too. Going full turtle mode, hunkering down in my coat collar and exhaling warm air up to keep my face warm. It works! Makes my glasses a condensation hell though. But struggling to see is worth keeping my face from getting frostbite lol. Lungs still don't like it tho.

[regtheviolin]

Pov: not being able to practice double bass since you borrow one from school

[rivenantiqnerd]

yall my crush said his type is people who are smarter than him and also musicians and that perfectly describes me soo