#or sooner if previews are a dick again !!!

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Erik would probably think that liliandra is a Homewrecker, even though it's just that he missed his shot with Charles while she took hers. Ya snooze you loose.

he cant even be a total hater like babes she saved your honey bunches of oats .......... she also stole him but she cant steal what was never yours OOP

[visionofhope04]

Viper (Part 1)

Batfamily x Batsib!Reader

Part 1 (here) Part 2 (coming soon!)

Ages(probably not accurate, just go with it please): Alfred (Immortal), Bruce (45-ish), Barbara (30), Dick (29), Cass (26), Jason (26), Stephanie (21), Tim (20), Reader (18), Damian (16)

Warning(s): cursing, explosions (not detailed), speak of poison and poisoning, (very) minor violence

Part 2 of this headcannon

A/N: Sorry this took so long 😭. So in the preview I posted I said I'd try using third person and they/them pronouns. It hasn't been working out which is why I didn't post this sooner, I'm sooooo sorry :( I've switched it back to using you because I figured it's still inclusive. Hope you guys enjoy this tho! I’m ngl I had a heart attack bc I thought this draft got lost to the void and I was abt to post it.

—

Your boots pounded ferociously on the concrete as you ran and made a sharp right turn into another alleyway. He wasn't far behind you, it would only be a matter of time before you were caught. You had to lose him, fast. Your heart beat against your ribcage, your breaths came out in pants from your nose. You were sweating, and not just from the physical effort. Despite being a trained assassin, you were nervous. Getting caught would change everything, but you were confident in your abilities. However, that did little to stop the lingering feeling of dread you felt every time he got a little too close. You sped up and turned right again into a narrow alley. The Red Hood, who was chasing you, did not expect this and couldn’t slow down, and passed the alley. Frustrated, he backpedaled and ran down the alley he saw you go into.

He reached the end of the alley and slowed to a stop. The alleyway opened up to an empty street, and there was no sign of you anywhere. All he saw was the odd stains on the alley��s walls, a dumpster, and garbage bags strewn about. He lost you.

“Fuck!” He exclaimed, then kicked the dumpster for good measure.

You jolted in your hiding spot, hopeful he wouldn’t notice the extra weight when he kicked it. Your heart began pounding harder, as if it was trying to escape your body, if he found you, you honestly thought it might. Blood rushed in your ears as you waited with bated breaths. Would he open it? Find you? Compromise everything you’ve worked so hard for? You wouldn’t go down without a fight, but with the Lazarus pit in his blood and not much of it in yours, you doubted you’d be able to take him with strength alone. You’d have to be smart about it, as always. Though you didn’t know how your poisons would affect someone the Lazarus pit had such a strong hold on, you’d stupidly never tried it before. You doubt your mother or grandfather would’ve approved of it, as they would’ve been the ones you tested it on (never Damian, you’d never do that to your precious little sibling), but the knowledge would’ve been helpful at the moment. You desperately hoped that he wouldn’t find you, so you wouldn’t have to find out on him. You didn’t want to kill him after all, he’s a part of Damian’s new family. You couldn't ruin your little sibling's chance at a family, at least one of you could find happiness.

After agonizing moments that seemed like years with your overactive brain, you heard him mutter a few more profanities and his footsteps receded. You held your breath as you waited and observed the sounds you heard. Water dripped from somewhere, most likely a roof, and then rustling. Your heart began to pound harder, assuming he was searching, only for you to hear a quiet ‘meow’ and instantly relax. Once you were sure no one was there, you carefully lifted the dumpster lid and peeked. No one. Perfect. You slinked out of the dumpster and grimaced at the smell. Gross, yes, but it worked. It wasn't by far the worst place you've hidden in, but you'd definitely need to shower as soon as you got back to your hideout. The things you do for this job. You trudged in the direction of your current main base of operations, taking great care to stay out of everyone's sight, especially Oracle's.

—

That was your first run-in with Red Hood. It took him longer than expected to figure out what was going on. Took him even longer to find you. You didn't mind though, it gave you more time to work with. It wouldn't be long before Red Hood kept failing to catch you and decided to involve the Big Bad Bat, though. With Batman would come Robin, then Red Robin, and then Nightwing. If Robin found out, it would ruin the whole plan.

The plan was simple, really. Take over Gotham's underground unnoticed, gather members and create a gang, find a perfect time to cause a gang war to distract the Batfamily, and then Talia would initiate her plans to take over Gotham while the bats are busy. Well, that's what the agreed plan was. You'd always been a loose cannon. Since Red Hood had been so close to catching you, the "unnoticed" part had been foiled, albeit a bit later than anticipated. 

"Hey boss, what brings you in today?" Your loyal henchman, Hopper asked you.

"We've got a job to do. Grab some explosives. We're sending a message."

—

“These places feel haunted.” Willow, another one of your most trusted henchmen, said as she placed one of the four explosives into place. 

“It’s probably the Joker’s victims’ souls, he loves warehouses, like typical villains. Maybe they’re here to warn us, ‘Don’t go into the basement, that’s where we’re buried!’. Or maybe they’ll kill us, who knows.”

“This isn’t a joke, you’re scaring me Tina!”

“You guys done?” You ask impatiently, but reluctantly slightly amused.

“Yup.”

— 

"Seven simultaneous explosions have just been spotted around the perimeter of the city."

"Head to the site closest to your current location. If you're paired with someone, split up. Oracle, call in Nightwing and Red Hood if possible. Do not engage with anyone, survey the damage only. "

"Yes sir!" Chirped Spoiler.

— 

After two hours, at 3 am, everyone returned to the cave.

“I take everything I said about explosions back, I hate explosives.”

“Welcome to the club, Timmy! I’ve hated explosives ever since-”

A chorus of groans resonated throughout the batcave, “We know, Jason!”

“You’re not special Todd, most of us here have died in one way or another.”

“Yeah but have you-”

As Damian and Jason began bickering and the whole group headed to the lockers, Dick pulled Bruce aside. 

“B, I didn’t want to say this in front of the others, but I think something bigger is going on. I found these objects around the warehouse I investigated.”

Batman took the bag Nightwing offered and observed the strange objects. Metal letters. Two A’s, one I, one L, and one T.

“It spells Talia.” He observes.

“She would never do something like that if she was behind it, and she wouldn’t leave a calling card, especially not in that form.”

"I know. Hmm. The damage seemed deliberate. It only destroyed the warehouses on the edge of the city. It caused minimal to no damage to surrounding properties."

"You're saying whoever did this is sending a message, about Talia." Nightwing inquired.

"Precisely."

“But who would do this? And why would they warn us? And what exactly are they warning us about? They must be close to her to have an idea of what she’s planning.”

“We’re going to find out.” He says, then turns to Tim, who had just exited the lockers. "Red Robin, check all security footage at all explosion sites and around them, report back all your findings."

Red Robin nods and heads to the Batcomputer to get to work.

—

Dun dun dunnnnn! So how'd you like it? It's been a while since I've wrote anything and it's because I hit a MAJOR writing block. Hope you enjoyed! I was fighting with these tags fr

Tags: @shakespear-picaso-lovechild @rosemary1225 @azazel-nyx @chevelledahuman

@snowcatlove

@danonered @cantbecreative

[eruden-writes]

Strictly Pleasure - Part 8 Preview

orc x human age gap paranormal romance 8 of ?

Short summary: An orc with a rock n' roll past has a crush on a single mother.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

First - Previous - Masterlist

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Full Part 8 can be found on Patreon right now! ;3

“Is Miss Heidi in there?” The soft voice of Calib the faun broke the silence. Another flare of embarrassment shot through Heidi as she heard the unmistakable sound of multiple feet shifting on the other side of the door. Who the hell else was out there? Heidi’s throughs spun around the other people - Jek’s bandmates - before landing on the orc himself. Her blush bit more aggressively at her cheeks.

Desperately, she looked to Periphoia, who merely raised her eyebrows and gave a grin. On the other side of the door, another person had began speaking.

“We’re sorry for laughing. Really was just at Guj, though.” Heidi thought that was the fish person, Dorzi, from team three. There was a lilt to their voice that reminded her of the stereotypical troublemaker from movies and tv shows. Like he was a second away from sharing his next scheme with you. “He’s always preened and puffed his chest out at being soooo recognizable and the figurehead of Theoret—” A meaty sounding thump interrupted the apology. “Oi!”

“Stick to the apology, limp dick.” That was unmistakably Jek. Heidi heard a similar gruff tone whenever he had to throw someone out of Strictly Pleasure, including that night at the sex shoppe’s theater. The memory made heat crawl down her spine.

However, as the voices continued on the other side of the door, Heidi could hear the camaraderie between the group. She could almost picture what the five were like on stage, traveling together, behind the scenes. The thought made her mortification creep up again. How could she have not seen it sooner? 

“That’s slander that is! I’m never limp when it matters! It ain’t my fault your little squee—“ From the other side of the door, the sounds of a scuffle interrupted Dorzi. Heidi wasn’t exactly sure what was happening, but it sounded like a mild tussle, threaded with curses.

A drawling voice, one that Heidi assumed was the elven man Minxi, cut through the low-key fray, “Oh, yes, you two fighting like that will definitely make her open those doors. Keep it up.”

“Minx is right, you two are acting childish.” The fifth and final voice, gravelly and gruff, sounded. That must be Torrik, Heidi thought, as she and Periphoia silently listened to the retired rockstars. 

Dorzi and Jek started speaking at once, their counter-arguments overlapping each other. Despite herself, Heidi felt the corners of her lips tilt up. 

Before she knew it, Periphoia was heading for the door. Fear jolted through Heidi as she followed the nymph, reaching out to tell her to wait. Before Heidi could stop Periphoia, she had thrown the door open.

[wrestlingisfake]

G1 Climax final preview

This is typically a one-match show, but that one match is a hum-dinger: the final of the G1 Climax tournament. Both of the finalists are entering their tenth match in 28 days--seven round-robin block matches, followed by a three-round single elimination bracket. The winner will earn the right to challenge the IWGP world champion in the main event of Wrestle Kingdom on January 4.

Kazuchika Okada vs. Tetsuya Naito - There is no time limit; there must be a winner. Okada won B Block with six wins and one loss, and then defeated Zack Sabre Jr. and EVIL for a record of 8-1. Naito is currently 7-2; he won D Block with five victories and went on to eliminate Hikuleo and Will Ospreay. This is their thirteenth singles encounter; Okada currently leads the series 7-6.

Naito's story is simple. He hasn't headlined the Tokyo Dome in January since 2021, and he hasn't won in that spot since 2020, when his victory promo was interrupted by KENTA. Ever since then his goal has been to right that wrong and get the last word on the biggest stage of them all. It'll be even sweeter if he can do it this year, since that would likely mean taking the world title from SANADA, who beat Naito and walked away from their faction to begin his rise to the top. It's not a particularly dramatic saga, but it lines up better than anything else the promotion has been building up all year.

All that's standing in Naito's way is Okada, but that's plenty. Okada doesn't need a storyline reason to win the G1 and headline the Tokyo Dome--he's Okada, end of story. A month ago I predicted Naito would win the G1, and I never wavered in that prediction. But now that the show is hours away and I see Okada on the other side of the bracket, I'm having doubts. I try not to bet against Okada. Even when you're getting a push, he can beat you. Even when you need this win, and it wouldn't hurt him to lose, he can beat you. The only thing that's inevitable in New Japan is that he'll be world champion in the Tokyo Dome again, sooner or later. They could easily defer Naito's storyline to fall back to their tippiest, toppiest guy.

I feel like that sweaty superhero guy who has to chose between pushing two buttons. I'm gonna grit my teeth and stick with Naito to win the G1. But I expect this match to be 35 minutes of Okada making me wonder if Naito is even on his level.

SANADA & Taichi & DOUKI & Yoshinobu Kanemaru vs. EVIL & Yujiro Takahashi & SHO & Dick Togo - Hoo boy, get ready for a couple of months of Just 5 Guys vs. House of Torture as they build to Evil challenging Sanada for the IWGP world title. House of Torture matches suck, and even worse they're designed to suck, so I'm not looking forward to this. This program is not what Sanada's title run needed. I guess Evil's team wins to get heat, as if they really need more heel heat.

Shingo Takagi & Hiromu Takahashi & Yota Tsuji & BUSHI vs. Will Ospreay & Jeff Cobb & Great-O-Khan & HENARE - I'm not sure why Los Ingobernables de Japon is closing out this tour facing the United Empire. Ospreay made news last night by unilaterally renaming his IWGP United States title to the IWGP United Kingdom title, so maybe the plan here is for one of the LIJ guys to be set up as challenger. Bushi is probably the weakest link in this match and can lose this. Although Henare is criminally underrated so I suppose he could get beat too. Something tells me Eddie Kingston will run in after this match to give Henare a receipt from last night.

David Finlay & Alex Coughlin & Gabe Kidd & KENTA & Chase Owens vs. El Phantasmo & Tama Tonga & Tanga Loa & Hikuleo & Jado - On last night's show they seemed to set up Finlay vs. Tonga for the NEVER title and Coughlin/Kidd vs. Phantasmo/Hikuleo (???) for the STRONG tag title. Sure, why not? Jado will probably get beat here.

Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI & Ryusuke Taguchi & Boltin Oleg vs. Zack Sabre Jr. & Mikey Nicholls & Shane Haste & Kosei Fujita - Oleg won a dark match last night to earn a future match against Sabre for the NJPW World television title; I'm not sure when that's supposed to happen. I assume everyone else in this match to set up Goto and Yoshi vs. Haste and Nicholls, but it's hard to know what the plans are for the tag division right now. I'd say Oleg should lose but under the circumstances they might actually protect him, so I guess Fujita can lose the fall.

Eddie Kingston & Hiroshi Tanahashi & Tomohiro Ishii & YOH vs. Satoshi Kojima & Hiroyoshi Tenzan & Togi Makabe & Tiger Mask - Wow, it's like they wanted to make sure Eddie got to wrestle all the old guys before he left Japan. I'm sure he'll have a blast. Other than that, there's not much to write home about. Eddie's team pretty much has to win, and I figure Tiger will do the job.

Shota Umino & Master Wato & Yuji Nagata & Tomoaki Honma vs. Ren Narita & Minoru Suzuki & El Desperado & Yuto Nakashima - Huh, we haven't seen Nagata in a New Japan ring lately; up until about six weeks ago, he'd been busy over in All Japan as their top champion. I'm a bit surprised he isn't on the old-timers team in the Eddie Kingston match. I guess the story here is nobody's sure where Narita and Suzuki are right now with their relationship, but I haven't seen any sign that's going anywhere. Nakashima is a Young Lion so he's going to lose here.

Kaito Kiyomiya & Ryohei Oiwa vs. Toru Yano & Oskar Leube - To me the point of bringing a top guy from Pro Wrestling NOAH would be to give him a respectable run in the G1 and treat him like a star. Instead New Japan positioned him in the middle of the pack and he's finishing out the tour in the opening match. At least he can surely beat Yano on his way out, but knowing Yano I wouldn't count on it. Oiwa and Leube are both Young Lions so either of them could lose the match, which makes this too close to call.

[1kook]

attachment: 1 image

— jjk x (f) reader

summary; But for Jungkook to initiate some sexting, nevertheless sexting at 1pm on a Saturday, when you were at work and you were almost positive he was supposed to be on stream right now? Unheard of, you had to mark this down somewhere. warnings; sexting, dick pics, dirty talk?, phone sex, vivid depictions of jungkook being just so sexy bc its true, rating; mature (18+) misc; mentions of youtuber kook 🥰, he’s just horny, stupid selfie trends (see here), he’s a little whiny but so hot v.v  wc; 4.6k 

notes; I've had this in my drafts since april 😐 n then i was like maybe we should actually finish this so i started n then last night i hit another follower milestone!!! so then i rlly forced myself to finish this bc i was so 🥺🖤👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 anyway enjoy lmk what u think its not proofread bc uhhhhh yeah 🤩

You’re at work when it happens.

It’s sometime between your usual listless thoughts of what to write for your weekly reflection papers for some course, and your trip to your store’s pharmacy to bother a coworker. Your phone vibrates in the pocket of your work apron. You’re normally pretty good at ignoring the sound, most of the times it’s just a classmate asking for help on homework or Jimin lamenting his love life, so you’ve grown used to ignoring the tiny vibrations, stocking a quarter shelf of different cooking oils before something in your brain tells you to check your phone.

You already know it’s not something grave, but that thought alone means nothing at the sight of the tiny jungkook♡ that appears at the very top of the list of notifications. Your boyfriend’s texts tended to be wildcards, never following a certain routine or alluding to any specifics. He could send you a long paragraph on how much he misses the scent of that one shampoo, the one you’d briefly run through last year because your usual brand was out of stock, with a ten point explanation on why you should switch back to it. Or two word, caveman sentences that drove you crazy because you never understood what exactly he wanted when he’d send those nondescript “munchies dip” texts.

You unlock your phone, clicking to the messenger app instead of directly on the notification. Hopefully the preview will give some warning on whether you should invest in this conversation or not. You hated the read receipts on messages, choosing to ghost conversations as you pleased, but Jungkook had wiggled his way into your phone one afternoon and specifically turned them on for his chat with you, and you’d never turned them off since. So he knows if you choose to ignore Attachment: 1 Image at 1:43pm exactly, and he'll pester you about it until you respond.

You contemplate it all for twenty seconds. It could be a variety of things, you guess, but the only way to find out is to actually see with your own eyes what he’s up to this time. He knows better than to distract you at work, is usually really good at waiting until your shift is over to spam you with messages. For him to send you something now, only a few hours into your shift, is uncharacteristic of him.

But you glance down the aisle anyway, taking note of some elderly woman you’d helped a few minutes prior and another teenager aimlessly walking around, probably looking for the snack aisle. You inhale and press down on your chat with Jungkook.

It takes you a moment to make out exactly what the image is, twisting and turning your phone around as you fight to see it without raising the brightness. It’s only when your eyes finally adjust to the dark screen, the faint beeping of the check-out registers fading into the distance, that you realize it’s a shot of the front of his sweatpants.

“Hm?” you murmur, getting brave enough to pinch the image between two fingers, zooming in until you’re able to decipher a multitude of details. For one, there’s a Flaming Hot Cheeto stain on the hem of his sweatpants, the same one you’d accidentally put on there a few weeks back and haven’t been able to wash out since. Then there’s that huge palm of his, tattoos and all, rested carefully against his thigh. It’s veiny and thick in all the right places, bringing all the attention to his knuckles, which you guess is what he was going for when you consider the centerpiece of the image—his hardened dick straining against the grey material.

There’s no text attached to the message, no snapchat font slapped over the image, so you wonder what exactly he wanted you to do with this information mid-shift. Well, realistically, you know exactly what he wants, but that doesn’t mean you won’t clown him before getting there. After all, Jungkook was seldom the naughty texter; sexting annoyed him, he would whine, because he would do all that and not even get to feel the true pleasure of sex, of being inside you. You’ve dabbled in it here and there, but it never went as perfectly as it did in pornos. He’d drop his phone and forget it, or you would straight up ignore the damn device as you went all in on yourself.

But for Jungkook to initiate some sexting, nevertheless sexting at 1pm on a Saturday, when you were at work and you were almost positive he was supposed to be on stream right now? Unheard of, you had to mark this down somewhere.

you what’s this about?

You decide to play it safe, because as exciting as the image of Jungkook at his computer chair, cock hard and angry at the thought of you, fluffy hair ruffled in that way you adored, jaw twitching and tightening as he touched himself, moaned deep and rough and just how you liked and—

As nice as that image was, for all you knew this vague message was Jungkook sending you a picture from a week ago to purposefully fuck with you at work.

jungkook♡ what time u get off? jungkook♡ miss you bad baby

Your stomach flips, and it takes everything in you to not squeal and bounce between the shelves like a toddler on a sugar rush. Here was your boyfriend, the cutest, sweetest boy, sending you dirty pictures of himself and telling you how much he needed you. Yes, YOU, not some random on the street, or someone else in a club, Jungkook needed pleasure and that pleasure could only come from you.

You glance back down the aisle again, checking your surroundings for the second time that day. You’ve been standing here, stock cart empty for a little over five minutes now, so it’s probably best to change location lest your manager come barking down your neck. You send one quick text before heading off for stock again.

you 4pm :(

Your phone dings again just as you’re leaving the stockroom, but you decide to check it once you get to the hygiene aisle you need to work on next. Still, the prospect of Jungkook having texted you has you walking with a skip in your step, one your coworker teases you about when you pass by her.

jungkook♡ fuck jungkook♡ tell me what panties youre wearing jungkook♡ please ?

You bite your lip, stopping yourself from smiling at the tone you’d picked up from his message. There was no doubt he’d been riled up for a while now, and you wonder if he sat through his usual Saturday morning streams with his cock hard, pushed against the edge of his desk like you knew he did when such things happened. The thought has you nearly fumbling with a bottle of aloe vera.

you seamless black thong you the one you bought me at the last vs sale

Briefly, you wonder if you should have lied and told him you were wearing that red lace set he’d given you last Valentine’s Day, the one he’d bought with his first big YouTube check. But the beauty of being in a relationship with someone like Jungkook is that you could have told him you were wearing grandma undies and he’d still think you were the most beautiful person to grace the planet.

jungkook♡ mm jungkook♡ tiny ones u ruined last time?

You set your phone down, speed stock a row of sunscreen like you’re on some shelf stocking national competition, before daring to text Jungkook again. Your cheeks are still warm, and your hand tightens dangerously around a bottle of shaving cream.

Before you can formulate some response, he’s sending another one in.

jungkook♡ u soaked those jungkook♡ came fast that day jungkook♡ want u so bad

Your cheeks burn, a little embarrassed that he remembers such details. As with all Victoria’s Secret panties, they were, like Jungkook said, extremely thin. You pause, shift your stance just barely, but you’re definitely wet. Not terribly so, but with this fabric, you’d start to notice it sooner than with others.

you mm you makin me wet bunny

It’s not a complete lie, but knowing Jungkook this is exactly what he needs to hear to get that competitive streak going. You shake your head to clear your thoughts, stocking another section of men’s shaving cream. It takes longer for him to message you back, and you wonder if he got off fine on his own. If it’s over now, at least he provided you with some distraction midway into your shift.

When he texts you again, you’ve almost completely convinced yourself he’s finished, so the Attachment: 1 Video that appears on your lock screen throws you for a loop.

It’s a short clip, no longer than ten seconds, but it has you scrambling to lower the volume on your device as some unsuspecting mother of two wanders past. You flash her your practiced smile, the same one you give all the store’s customers. Not like your boyfriend is jacking it off on your phone, shallow pants filtering out from the speakers.

You turn your phone over carefully after she leaves, try to at least pretend you’re still doing your job as you play the video again.

Sweats are gone, but boxers remain. Legs deliciously exposed, thick thighs with muscles that ripple when he moves. Shirt pulled up just slightly to showcase that broad expanse of tummy, cute belly button and defined abs that tighten with each glide of his palm over the outline of his cock. Your mouth fills with drool at the sight. He was so hot.

Your brain hasn’t even processed it yet, all your energy directed towards your clenched pussy, when he shoots another text.

jungkook♡ im so fckin hard jungkook♡ wanna kiss yuo every where baby jungkook♡ come ove r soon ??

Shutting your eyes and counting to ten doesn’t help ward off the sudden wave of horniness that consumes you, but it does remind you of the job you’re supposed to be doing now. You shake your head, as if the image of Jungkook’s dick throbbing beneath his boxers, low voice in your ear, will magically disappear. It doesn’t, and it plagues you even more when you begin stocking a section of sunscreen, numbly instructing yourself on what to do next. Shaving cream, sunscreen, lotion next, you repeat.

It doesn’t help.

Two minutes later and you’re scrambling for the phone you’d hastily tucked into your apron pocket, tapping your passcode in until your messages with Jungkook are pulled up again.

you after work you promise

Your head is absolutely spinning, the coil in your stomach too tight for you to try and be a functioning member of society. Something in you says to sneak off to the bathroom and call him, but your boss is a little bit of a prick when he wants to be, thinks you take too many bathroom breaks as is.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear. A curt call of your name has you whirling to face your shelves again, phone tightly pressed against your ribs like maybe it’ll melt into your skin and he won’t see it. At the same time, your sudden fright has you scrambling to turn it off, fingers sloppily pressing against the buttons, hitting the volume like seven times before you eventually feel the familiar click that signals it’s off.

Your boss disappears shortly after, and with his sudden appearance having made every hair on your body stand, you find yourself now slumping against your stock cart. Jesus, that man was a handful to deal with.

The paranoia sticks for a little bit, has you stocking shelf after shelf like a robot until you finish the entire row of hygiene products, back stiff from bending over so much. It’s only when you return to the stockroom ten minutes later that you dare take your phone out again.

A pleasant surprise awaits.

It would appear that during your haste to hide your phone from your boss— Jungkook’s scandalous messages and all —your frantic hands had done something else. A fuzzy picture on your end, a blurry display of lotion bottles you had stacked just before your boss’s impromptu appearance, with no words to accompany them. Normally Jungkook would have ignored that; you frequently sent accidental messages like this, butt texted him, he says.

But there’s something about Jungkook’s horny brain that makes him do stupid things, makes him blow up your phone with a series of question marks, call you four times, whine and fuss in your message thread, and eventually, send you probably the oddest image to date.

jungkook♡ ??? jungkook♡ ????what is that jungkook♡ baby please jungkook♡ I don’t get it ??

jungkook♡ Missed Call (4)

jungkook♡ baby jungkook♡ what does it mean jungkook♡ please ur drivign me insane jungkook♡ jsut wanna hear yuor voice jungkook♡ fuck please just

And then, there’s another one of those cursed Attachment: 1 Image messages.

You shouldn’t be as surprised as you are. You’ve been dating Jungkook for a few months now, know he had that sort of unique personality most college dropouts turned YouTubers do. But every now and then the absurdity of his actions makes you question him still, makes you wonder what exactly goes on in that pretty head of his to warrant such ideas, makes him balance a bottle of body lotion on the thick outline of his cock like this.

Unlike the first few images, this one was taken in front of a mirror. The blinding fluorescent light in his bathroom paints him in a stark color, has every inch of his pretty face on display for you. Rosy cheeks, dewy skin. Perfectly swollen cock straining beneath his grey boxers, curved up against his hip. Shirt pulled up, finally freeing that expanse of muscles on his abdomen, cute little belly button on display once again. The red material is pulled up to his mouth, pearly white teeth biting down on the fabric, and he’s got this flushed expression on his face.

But the real star of the show isn’t his chiseled abdomen or sexy expression, but the sheer hardness of his dick that lets him balance a bottle of body lotion over it, like a fuckin’ shelf or something. He’s so hard, dick so full beneath his boxers. So big too, the little boxers pulled taught around said engorged cock and thick thighs.

Your brain says to laugh, to tease him for being such a clown even when he’s horny as hell. He won’t take it to heart, will probably laugh along with you and you’ll add it to your still growing list of funny memories.

But your caveman libido says call him, so that’s what you do, ducking down behind a new shipment pallet with a squeak as the phone rings. It only lasts four seconds before he picks up, voice breathy and low, but it sounds so loud in the silence of the stockroom.

He doesn’t even let you get a greeting in. “You like my picture, baby?” he husks. It sounds like he’s right there, right beside you, speaking into your ear. Your pussy throbs at the way he sounds. Paired with the picture from before, it has your body tingling all over.

“What the fuck is that?” you hiss, trying to not let the sudden overflow of arousal leak into your words. Jungkook chuckles.

“What?” he huffs. There’s the brief sound of shuffling, the scratchy noise of his phone presumably being pressed against his shoulder. “I’m so hard, baby,” he sighs before you can pretend to reprimand him any further. “Fuck— you, can you just talk to me?” he groans, and the disgusting sound of him spitting into his palm fills your ear.

Your face feels warm, eyes nervously peering across the stockroom like your boss will suddenly appear now of all times to rip you from this important phone call. The anxiety and arousal mix weirdly, have your leg bouncing but every new movement sends a shock up your aching cunt to your chest, and then out to the tips of your fingers.

“You shouldn’t be doing that when I’m at work,” you murmur hurriedly, moving to nervously bite at your finger. Jungkook moans softly.

“Uh huh,” he says.

The air conditioning turns on and you nearly jump out of your own skin. “Kook,” you stress, frazzled by your own burning arousal and the fear of being caught. Like you said. Weird mix. “I— not when I can’t respond.”

He shudders on the line. “You’re responding now,” he points out. You hate when he’s right. Before you can defend yourself, define what a proper response is in this scenario, he’s beating you to the punch. “Baby,” he whimpers, voice so airy yet low, makes your eyes roll into the back of your head, back unconsciously arching. “Couldn’t stop— fuck.”

Your mouth feels dry, all and any form of lecturing fading from your thoughts as you become consumed in Jungkook’s little whines and whimpers. He talks smoothly, a modern day Casanova, and it’s certainly because of that cult-like harem he’s gathered on YouTube. Teenage girls who kiss his ass, tell him he’s cute and dreamy. Make his ego so big.

But then he gets horny and can barely contain that lisp you tease him about, shivers and melts when you put his cock in your mouth. “Couldn't what, bunny?” you mumble, voice drawn tight because now you were really horny, and it was all his fault.

The nickname makes him mewl prettily, your speaker suddenly going scratchy as he fumbles with his phone. “C- Couldn't stop thinking about you— your mouth,” he admits, and now you’re certain he’d sat through that Saturday morning stream like this. “T- Tits,” he adds, lisp slipping through. “Fuck.”

You bite your lip, eyes fluttering shut as you remind yourself now was not the time or place to get yourself off. But, well. That didn’t mean you couldn’t get him off. “Sat through your stream like this?” you murmur, circling your kneecap with a trembling finger as if it’ll ward away the raging lust in your abdomen. Jungkook confirms with a breathy moan. “Had all your little fans wondering why you ended so early.”

He groans. “No,” he chokes, voice hot from how much it wavers. “They— I lied,” he confesses out of nowhere, “s- said I had a doctor’s appointment.”

You muffle a giggle into your palm. “Naughty,” you tease. “Too hard to do your job.”

“Just,” he cuts off, voice feathery. He sounds so close and you haven’t even said anything of substantial value yet. “Tell me,” he says quietly, “what to— mmh, what to do.”

A smirk consumes your features. You try to hide it, but there’s no one here anyway so you’re left grinning at an unpacked box of dental floss like a madwoman. “Why?” you inquire playfully, bask in the sad little whimper he responds with. “Shouldn’t you know how to make yourself cum?”

Another groan of frustration, desperation seeping into his tone when he speaks again. “Baby, please,” he begs, and it feels good. Feels nice to have this big YouTuber begging for you like this, whimpering your name like his doesn’t appear on the top 25 most viewed. “Like when you— ah — when you tell me… what to do.”

Your body feels hot, thighs pressing together with each whimper that falls from his lips. “Okay,” you concede, and he audibly moans in relief. “Tip first,” you instruct softly, eyes defocusing as your brain slowly starts to manifest the image of Jungkook spread out on his bed. Thick thighs, grey boxers pulled taught around them, fat cock between his pretty hands, inked knuckles squeezing around his member. You swallow. You can tell exactly when Jungkook does as you say because another muffled moan fills the speaker. “One finger,” you remind him quickly, head spinning from the mere memory of his dick. “Run it… run it over the slit, bunny.”

“Nngh—“ Jungkook sputters. You can only imagine the face he’s making now, the bottom lip he’s bitten raw by now. He does it a lot; it’s a nervous habit. But as sexy as it looks when you’re in bed, you know he has sensitive lips because of it, bleeds easily if he’s too harsh. You have half the mind to remind him about it now, but then he’s hurriedly gasping out for more. “And, and then? Wha— what then, baby?”

He sounds so sweet, melodic voice dripping with honey. “Touch your balls,” you say a little breathlessly. “Don’t squeeze,” you add, “just roll your palm over them.” Your palm squeezes against your thigh, as if it’s remembering the feel of his body, the soft skin between his thighs when you’re down there. He gets so jittery, thick thighs nearly crushing you if you drag him along too much. “O- Other hand on your cock,” you stumble, thighs squeezed together. “Stroke yourself just like I do, bunny.”

Jungkook complies. “Just like you?” he mumbles, suddenly sounds farther away. As if he’s dropped his phone off to the side. “Fffuck,” he grunts, “m- mouth is so pretty.”

“Hm?” you inquire, so consumed with tampering down your growing arousal for a second that you miss his sentence.

Jungkook’s breath stutters, and for a moment you’re met with the wet squelch of his cock in his hand. And then, “pretty mouth… make me— make me wanna see you cry.”

You bite your lip. “Why,” you say tentatively, finally caving in with a hand fluttering over the front seam of your jeans. Not a question, more of a gentle nudge for him to spill his thoughts.

“Be- Because,” he cries, fucking into his hand. He sounds closer and closer. You have to wonder just how long he had been riled up. It’s been a while since his first message, he was probably desperate by now. “Y- You’re so nice,” he cries, and the sentiment, though oddly out of place, makes your heart squeeze with adoration for the boy on the line. “Wanna be,” he groans, “wanna be so fucking mean to you, baby.”

The sudden change of tone makes you choke on a moan, hand pressing against your mound like it’ll somehow penetrate the thick material of your jeans and give you the sensations you crave. As it stands, it’s a muted feeling you get instead. When your hands fail, his voice compensates. “Fffuck, don’t you— don’t you think about it too?”

Admittedly, no.

Jungkook had always been a gentleman in bed. Always cared for your needs before his own, went out of his way to make you feel pampered and adored during your most vulnerable moments. Contrary to what his online persona might say, he was a good boy. Sweetest boy you knew, touched you like you were made of glass.

So to suddenly learn of this dream— fantasy? kink? —of his that you would certainly enjoy equally as much, well. It made you whimper into your palm, eyes worriedly flickering toward the stockroom’s entrance.

“Why?” you whisper, feeling like a broken doll repeating the same phrase over and over again. You’re suddenly aware of how hot everything was. Your polo felt sticky against your spine, apron too tight, jeans too stuffy. How long had you been hiding in here for? You don’t even know. Hopefully your absence on the floor had gone unnoticed.

Jungkook pants into the line; everything sounds so sticky and wet on his end, hand undoubtedly working away at his cock. “Shit,” he curses, doesn’t really answer your question until you prod a second time. “I- I like it,” he stammers. “When you… fuck, when you look small.” He elaborates before you can even ask, breath heavy and drawn out. He was so close. “When your mouth… when it hurts,” he says, thoughts a scrambled mess. “Like when you— when you cry because my cock is— it’s too big for you.”

A blatant ego boost you’ll ignore for now. Not like you can focus on too many things right now anyway. “Your cock is big, bunny,” you agree softly instead. Your legs feel cramped from crouching so long, so you push yourself to your feet. Except then you’re made aware of how fucking wet you are, panties soaked from the phone call with your boyfriend. You shift and they stick to your folds, make you release a shaky exhale that Jungkook doesn’t miss.

“I— you’re wet,” he says boldly, and this time your meek confirmation isn’t a lie. Jungkook grunts. “Fuck, baby, I—“ cut off by his own whiny cry, probably bucking into his hand like a madman by now. “Wanna, wanna kiss you everywhere,” he says, a call back to his earlier message. Your legs feel like jello. You want him to kiss you everywhere too— lips, tits, cunt that is dripping for him now.

“I- I’ll be over soon,” you stammer, feeling like you’ll pass out if he carries on any further. He sounds so good on the line, soft pants, rough growls. You can’t possibly listen anymore, not when you’re so wet and horny in the middle of your shift. “Just,” you pause, can’t get the image of his pretty cock out of your mind. Every blink makes it more vivid, reminds you of the vein on the underside, the exact shade of the tip.

“What?” Jungkook hisses, voice higher than usual, parts of it lost under the rapid movements of his hand. “Tell me, baby, tell me what to do,” he begs hoarsely, “I’ll do it.” Sounds so desperate and needy, two seconds away from busting all over his hand.

You have to lean against the wall of the stockroom to ground yourself, remind yourself you’re not in the same situation as Jungkook and can’t cum in your pants like a teenager. “J- Just cum,” you choke, eyes fluttering shut.

He must’ve been waiting for that command, because the second the words leave your throat he’s filling the line with breathy groans and cries as he comes all over himself, probably ruins his t-shirt. The sounds have your hips unconsciously bucking forward into nothingness, the frustration of not being able to cum with him manifesting in the form of a tiny little sob. Luckily, he doesn’t catch it.

When it’s all said and done, he’s left panting into the receiver, flooding your speaker with breathy sighs that only make you more and more aroused.

“You’re terrible,” you frown, cheeks flushed, body tingling. You flip your wrist over and check the time; it’s been about sixteen minutes since you disappeared from outside. Sixteen minutes of listening to Jungkook touch himself and moan and whine and whimper. Tease you with new possibilities you had never considered before. And now he’s satisfied and you’re not.

Jungkook chuckles, low and tired. The sound shoots straight to your cunt. “Come over after you shift,” he says, as if you’re not planning to fake a severe case of the flu right now in order to get off early and run to his bed. You only had a little less than two hours of your shift left anyway. Not like they paid you well to begin with. Jungkook shifts, releases one of those saccharine groans as he probably snuggles into his bed, all sweaty and worn out. “Want you to fuck my face, baby.”

You frown, counting to ten to calm yourself down. Another few minutes of listless conversation, and you hang up. Your body feels featherlight, a little woozy as you make your way back out into the floor.

Nothing has changed. Customers pour in and out, your boss scolds you for a display you didn’t do, and life inside the store drags on. No one knows that you’re soaking your panties to hell and back, Jungkook’s soothing moans in your ear. Life goes on.

you shift ends in 20

jungkook♡ sweet jungkook♡ got your seat ready jungkook♡ Attachment: 1 Image

Copyright © 2020, 1kook on tumblr. absolutely NO reposts allowed.

[ifliamsmile]

Under Gotham’s Sky -Dick Grayson Imagine || Part 4

Part 3 Part 5

“Hey man, how you doing?” Hank asked when Dick appeared on the kitchen.

“Eating dog food early on the morning?”

“What? No! This is something very delicious that Conner made”

“That’s krypto’s”

Dick answered grabbing a cup of coffee and Hank throwed the meat on the trash immediately.

“But hey. Don’t dodge the subject. How are you doing?”

“Doesn’t matter now, no matter how bad I feel, she must have felt way worse all this time, so I don’t have anything to complain. I deserved that”

“You’ll always be on your knees for that woman, won’t you?”

Hank asked, feeling bad for Dick and the only thing the man did was give his friend a little smile.

“She said she wanted to keep it professional. Let’s keep it professional”

“Dick”

“Hey, good morning.”

“In some of your radios, me and Connor heard that Red Hood commands crime now. That thing in the bank..certainly happened to show who rules now.”

Gar came to tell Dick.

“Wow. Early in the morning and you guys are already up searching?”

“You told us to focus. The sooner we found about this, the sooner we stop him.”

Conner answered

“Right.” Dick crossed his arms “let’s reunite on BatCave.”

Dick said and all the titans followed up to there.

“The police have a way to find out but..”

“But we don’t have the police”

Dove completed his phrase

“Yes”

“We could call Detective Y/L/N”

Gar suggested.

“She won’t answer my calls.”

Dick said, knowing that the things were in bad term now and knowing you to well to understand you weren't going to talk to him so soon.

“But she won’t care if I only go there ask for her help, will she?”

Kory said. Titans couldn’t do anything without GCPD support and all of them knew it. So even with the personal thing between you and Dick, she would try.

————

“Have you even slept?”

Violet came to your desk. She would always notice if something were wrong with you.

“Yes, Vi. I did”

You rolled your eyes, taking one sip of your coffee.

“Liar! Let me pass something on your face, some makeup won’t hurt you know?”

“Seriously?”

Violet came near to you with a little bag of make up and made something really fast on your face.

“Your ex is in town and you have no make up? No way, baby.”

You laughed at her. Only Violet to make you have fun. Seeing Dick for the first time in a year and in a bad way really took the worst of you.

You were going to answer her when you heard someone.

“Detective Y/L/N”

You recognized the woman passing through GCPD’s door, walking 'till you.

“Yes. Starfire, right?”

Violet looked, almost like she was asking if it was okay. You looked at her and nodded, so she left your life, leaving you alone with her.

“Yeah! You can call me Kory.”

She offered you a smile and you answered.

“And how can I help you, Kory?”

“Detective. We’ve found something about red hood, something that would also matter to you, so I’m here in the name of the Titans, we need your help.”

In the minute she said it, you started thinking. A minute of silence but your head worked like crazy. Would you face it all again? Your heart was warning you it was dangerous, but your reason yelled to you that you needed to remember that you were a professional. A detective.

And like this you were heading to Wayne Manor to meet the titans.

————

“….so we thought that you could help us on it”

Gar explained everything he said to Dick earlier and you listened carefully. You and the titans were on the BatCave. Dick stood there, quiet, you both didn’t spoke anything directly to each other yet.

In silence, he admired how beautiful you were. Black always looked so good on you. Damn, he missed you.

“Yeah, I mean, police has a program to identify the pattern of walk of suspects. We could test Red Hood’s and Robin’s walk and see.”

“It sounds perfect.”

Kory said, excited.

“But still, we can’t understand Red Hood’s actions. We can’t preview what he’s going to do next, until it happens”

Dick said and for the first time, your eyes locked on each other’s.

“There’s an option you won’t like not even a bit”

You said, the look on your eyes when you faced him made Dick feel in a spell.

“And which one would it be?”

“Scarecrow”

“Jonathan Crane? No. Not an opinion”

“To recognize mental patterns he’s the best we have, unfortunately.”

“Batman, you and I put him on Arkham for a reason. He almost killed you once, did you forget this already?”

Dick came closer to you, clearly distressed by this and you took a deep breath, controlling yourself with his proximity.

“Batman was using his help to know criminal’s profile before he left Gotham.”

Dick stood in silence, surprised with what you said and you broke your eye contact.

“You could visit him. Ask about red hood”

You said, avoiding to look into his eyes, the depth there made you weak.

“Ok”

He nodded.

“Titans, I’ll be on GCPD trying to match their walks and see if it feets, while Dick go to Arkham. I’ll let you know as soon as I know something. But whatever that happens, don’t act alone. You hear me? Do not act without GCPD’s support.”

You told them and they all nodded, even Dick.

“It seems a good plan.”

Gar said and you nodded, leaving the cave. In a few more steps, when you were crossing the front door, you feel someone approaching you from behind, not even bothering turning around to see who it was, you knew Dick like the back of your hands, even his steps were unmistakable to you.His strong fingers held your arm, softly.

“Y/n.” You turned to look at him “Thank you for coming”

“I didn’t come here for you.”

You didn’t look at his eyes, you had to leave immediately, before you forgot why you needed to be away from him. And like this, you left the Wayne Manor, following to GCPD.

————

“Goddam. How can it be possible..”

You were perplexed. You did it 1, 2, 3 times and it still matched.

Red Hood and Robin walk matched. Red hood was..Jason Todd.

Your hand covered your mouth and you ran them through all of your face. Dick was right all along. He needed to know.

“Detective Y/L/N, the captain requests you as soon as possible”

Jack, one of the caps, came closer to your desk. Damn, you couldn’t call Dick now.

“I’m on my way.”

You went almost running to your captain’s office.

“Detective, Scarecrow suffered an attack of Red Hood on Arkham before he met with Dick Grayson. You must request his exchange to Blackgate immediately.”

“Right, Cap”

Great. The day was only starting and was already a mess. Damn you Jason Todd.

———

Like your captain told you to, you just sent Jonathan Creane to Blackgate, and then you did what you needed to do.

You dialed the number you had written in your brain on your phone. In two calls, he answered.

“Y/n?”

Your heart missed the beats when you heard his voice.

“Dick, where are you?”

“I just left Arkham. You need something?”

“Listen to me. You were right all along, there was something wrong about Jason’s death.”

“Wait, what?”

“What were wrong is that..Jason is alive, Dick. And Jason is Red Hood. And he just attacked Jonathan Crane on Arkham, right after you left. He will follow to BlackGate where he’s safer”

All you could hear was silence. Dick didn’t answer and you couldn’t hear any sound.

“Dick? You okay?”

Here were you. Worrying about him, about how he felt, you knew it would never change.

“When will Jonathan move to Blackgate?”

“Now.”

“Ok”

Dick answered and Hung up.

“Dick? Dick! Damn.”

You knew Dick too well to know when he was going to do something. You waited for his call for almost a hour. What could he do afterall? He could have only followed to Wayne Manor.

There were 40 minutes and nothing of Dick.

“Detective!” Your captain came to your desk with Violet behind her and you got up from your chair.

“Jonathan Crane was kidnapped by a black car right when he was going to left Arkham. Do you know anything about it?”

You didn’t’t answer her and only followed to the big computer she had on her desk. You knew exactly what happened.

“Detective Y/L/N! Answer me, Now!”

“Vi! I need you to search for a Maserati on the map of Gotham and send me the location. Now!”

Violet nodded and ran to her desk.

“Captain, you need to trust me.”

“If it wasn’t for me trusting you, you’d have already been fired. Speak. Now!”

Before you could answer her, Violet screamed

“Black Maserati following to the 68 meters at north!”

North. What could have on north for Dick to go? You thought for some seconds and then it was clear in your mind.

Bruce’s lodge. Dick took Scarecrow there because he knew something. But what?

“I need a helicopter heading to his location.”

“You heard the Detective, Jack. An helicopter to that location. NOW!”

—————

30 minutes later you found the location, between a dense wood, you could see the lodge. You knew it was rounded by Wayne Tech’s protection, you could never get there without permission. So you waited to give the signal.

Damn, How you hated him for bringing himself for that situation. You told them.

Don’t. Act. Alone. This were the instructions!

But what made your heart almost drop of your mouth was what you saw before. Close to the lodge there were some strange moves. A red suit appearing.

“Captain.”

You called her and she came closer.

“Am I seeing right? Is it red hood?”

Your captain took a carefull look.

“It isn’t only red hood, Detective. It’s redhood and nightwing. Fighting”

You felt a knock on your stomach.

Dick and Jason. Fighting. Alone.

You knew Dick during all your life. You knew he was completely capable of defeating Jason and defending himself. But you knew you both had a connection. A strong one. And something made you feel scared about it.

You got lost in your thoughts for more time than you realized.

“Detective” you heard a voice coming from far “DETECTIVE!”

The voice took you off of your thoughts. It was your captain.

“What?”

“I’ll order my sniper to shoot.”

“Wait. Shoot?!”

“That’s our chance to get Red Hood and end this nightmare. They’re close, they can do this without hurting Nightwing.”

The idea seemed completely crazy to you. What if Dick got shot? There were chances and you couldn’t stand it.

What if Dick died? You felt a tight in your heart.

“Captain, but..”

“There are no “but’s”, detective.”

She said and contacted the cops on the helicopter

“When you get Red Hood on your aym, shoot.”

“Got it.”

You knew it didn’t sound fine. If things were wrong, it would end in a complete disaster.

Damn, Dick, why did you have to be so stubborn?

You thought.

“Cap. Permission to shoot?”

“Yes.”

The captain said by looking at the map and they shoot.

Some minutes passed.

“Captain, I’m afraid the target wasn’t the one I shoot. We may have shoot Nightwing”

In the moment you heard it, your entire world fell apart.

Dick got shot.

[literaryspinster]

Here’s that 1000 word preview of Something In The Water I promised! I can’t say exactly when the full chapter will be up since things have been sort of crazy at work, but it should be sooner than later. Enjoy! Ch. 5

She needs to get off of this island.

Not that it’s such a bad place, it’s just too small, she needs to be somewhere that stretches the mind, maybe help her remember how she ended up here in the first place. She doesn’t know how many hours passed between fleeing her wedding and waking up naked on the beach in the dead of night with a splintering headache and a mouth full of sand, but every single one of them is unaccounted for. All she knows is that she can’t go back home, and doesn't have the means to go anywhere else. 

What she does have is the necessary nerve to have found a deserted house with a window that could be easily cracked open (easily for her anyway). Isle DeGranger is full of them. So many residents of the town only stay in their homes a couple of weeks out of the year, and either rent them out to vacationers or just leave them there to look pretty for the rest of the time. Still, squatting in a quaint old vacation home with a hammock out back and a faulty alarm system isn’t without its anxieties. Every time she hears the slightest creak or groan she darts her eyes toward the door, ready to cut and run. When it’s quiet and still, she uses her time wisely, planning where she’ll go next and how she’ll get there.

 In simpler times, the go to method would be to swim, follow the right currents in the right directions until she landed somewhere great, or at least interesting. But it’s out of the question for now, the ocean is vast, but still not big enough for them not to find her after a few hours or so. Until further notice, the safest place is on land, keeping as low a profile as she can.

In retrospect, flirting with a random guy in a bar probably wasn’t the best way to go about it, whether it was for a purpose or not. She should have just left, she’d already successfully pickpocketed enough cash from the drunk, grabby patrons that night to buy food for the week, she didn’t need to push it. 

If only it weren’t for his damn face.

The second she saw him from across the bar she knew she wanted to see that face up close, see the way it changed when he laughed, the way his eyes crinkled and his dimples caved in. It was probably for the best that he charged off so quickly, because if he hadn’t then she might have done more than just look.

Her parents always said she had a ridiculous fascination with the creatures up here, but it never was true. It’s the freedom, to go anywhere she pleases, learn whatever interests her, kiss whoever she sees worthy, live for herself and not some arbitrary 5000 league long list of customs that she never could understand. 

But Dick, he fascinated her from the very beginning. And before she sets off for the next place, she needs to see that face again.

****

This was a mistake.

This was worse than a mistake, this was a colossal fuck up of fyrefest proportions.

Tim Drake, who’s the boyfriend of Gar Logan, who’s the best friend of Rachel Roth, who’s the adoptive daughter of Dick Grayson, is a fucking true crime youtuber.

His channel has 500,000 subscribers.

Dick and Rachel go to meet their Ferry during one of the few free hours Dick has had all week. And the second they hop off to greet her, caterwauling her name like the biggest fans at her concert, he knows they’re going to be more of a handful than anything else happening in the wake of the crime. 

Gar and Rachel immediately fall into a giant hug, their respective green and lavender hair meeting in the middle. While Tim, big eyed, gangly, too much energy for one boy Tim, immediately makes a beeline for Dick.

“Detective Grayson  so good to finally meet you,” he says, offering a firm, quick handshake. “I know this is a dark time on the island but I promise we’re only here to help.”

“Oh, and we also promise we didn’t know about the murder until after you invited us,” Gar says, releasing Rachel.

“It’s fine,” says Rachel. “I’m just glad you're here, and you better not spend the whole time working on your channel.”

“Hand to God,” says Tim.

“Wait, Channel?” Dick asks, slightly panicked but not letting it show.

“Yes, glad you asked,” says Tim, immediately making Dick wish that he hadn’t. 

“I host The Crime Bird with Tim Drake, and I’m likely to be the first channel to cover the DeGranger Lighthouse murder, I know it’s fast but the sooner the word is out there the sooner we can catch whoever did this.”

“Wait, we?” Says Rachel. “No thanks.”

“I know I know, you guys have been missing each other for months, I don’t want to get in the way of you catching up. How about I shadow Dick at the station today and you guys enjoy a beach day?” Tim continues as if it’s all been decided already.

“Sounds good to me,” says Gar. “I wanted to check out the tide pools and rent a Jet ski, Rach, you good to jet ski?”

“No but someone has to take pictures,” she says.

“Fine by me,” says Gar. “Oh and is it true you have a saltwater hot tub?”

“Wait, hold on,” Dick says, trying to get on top of the situation. He’s not entirely sure how the last three minutes have played out this way but he needs to rein it back and fast. “You’re not shadowing me at the station.”

“Listen, I can help, I know way more about this stuff than you think,” Tim insists.

“Because of your channel? And by the way Isn’t it a little, I don’t know, unethical to profit off of a tragedy like this?” Dick almost feels bad about saying it, this is a kid after all, but the last thing he needs is some gung ho murder fanboy following his every move. Tim doesn’t seem offended much at all though.

“That’s a totally valid concern my man, but I promise it’s not like that, half the proceeds from my channel go to the families of the victims, the other half is split between helping support my family and paying for my education.”

“Tim wants to be a forensic scientist,” Gar offers proudly.

“Only trying to keep up with you Mr. future veterinarian,” Tim offers back before turning his attention to Dick again. “Anyway Grayson, when do we get started?”

Did he mention that this was a mistake?

[popculturebuffet]

Scooby Doo (2002) Review: The Most Punchable Fred Jones of All Time

It’s one last hurrah for Halloween as I take a look at the often derided 2002 Scooby Doo Movie! See what happens when you combine future superstar director James Gunn with .. the guy who thought directing the Smurf’s movie and Big’s Mama’s House were good ideas. Oh and with a splash of the guy who wrote the loveable family film Cheaper by the Dozen and the utterly loathed Percy Jackson film. It’s as messy as you’d expect with that.. but is it BAD? good, so bad it’s good, just sorta okay? Come with me as I try to find out under the cut with a full review. 

I’ve always loved Scooby Doo. I grew up with the guy, watching reruns of the non-scrappy classic series from Where Are You to the Scooby Doo Movies, the three Superstar 10 movies (Boo Brothers, Ghoul School and Reluctant Werewolf), or the at the time brand new What’s New Scooby Doo. And later in life i’d absolutely adore Mystery Incorporated.. minus the whole Shaggy, Scooby Velma love triangle, but i’ll likely cover that at some point or sooner, you can comission reviews from me for 5 bucks each, 5 dollars off group orders if you really want to make me suffer through that that bad. But getting off self promotion point is I loved and still love the franchise. While I”ve yet to see “Scooby Doo and Guess Who”, though given there’s Weird Al, Kristan Schaal and Urkel episodes you can be sure i’m going to eventually, and Scoob was VERY ehhh even if Dick Dastardly was awesome. But despite my history with the great dane much like with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, despite my rich history with the franchise I haven’t dove in yet and with a friend who could use a nice halloween suprise and loves scooby doo, I figured now was the time to take a look at it.  And since i’d been wanting to take a look at it again anyway, and decided going big wasn’t a bad way to start, i’m taking a look at the 2002 Scooby Doo movie. I saw this flim first run in a drive in, and saw the sequel the same way and loved it as a kid, and fondly remember checking out the Sountrack Preview page back before youtube existed to make checking out soundtracks easier. It was a simplier time. And even rewatching it later with my nieces, I found myself liking it.  And the thing was almost every time this film comes up it’s with a turned up nose. The CGI, the confused audience, the deciding to cast Freddy Prinze Junior.. all terrible decisions that overshadow the film, when it’s not that bad. It’s not GREAT, but it’s not TERRIBLE either. So what is it then? Well i’ll tells ya. Let’s start with

PRODUCTION: Wait James Gunn Wrote This?

At the turn of the millneium Scooby Doo was back on top. After waning popularity during the Scrappy era, the advent of the warner affilated Cartoon Network meant a whole new generation of kids (raises hand) got to experince Scooby Doo for the first time. This new audeince lead to Scooby Doo on Zombie Island, the first of the franchises 80 or so DTV movies that will continue on long after the earth dies, and brought back the franchise after it’s long slumber. Scooby Doo went from dead to as popular as he was in his hey day again. Naturally Warner wanted to cash in and thus this movie was born.  Originally the film was supposed to be a more adult project, a send up of the franchise with more sex jokes and what not than made the final cut according to writer James Gunn. Yes, the same James Gunn who wrote and directed the Guardians of the Galaxy movie and whose currently saving the suicide squad. It was one of Gunn’s earlier films but just from when he’s talked about it, you can tell he genuinely cared about the project.  Along for the ride with our future Guardian was his co-writer, Craig Titely,  who i’m convinced only came in to do punch ups as the guy has only written three other movies. One of them was being one of MANY writers on Cheaper by the Dozen and thus likely not doing much of note with that, and the other.. is being the only writer on Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief’s movie adaptation.. aka the movie the fanbase and general audiences rejected in droves yet SOMEHOW got a sequel. Which is somehow still worse than his other film, one that asks “was the moon landing a hoax?” Spoilers, it wasn’t. Point is this isn’t a resume that screams co creator and more screams “Guy brought in to kid freindly this up”. More on that in a minute.  The director is another less than reassuring face: Raja Gosnell, whose credits BEFORE this film were Home Alone 3, Never Been Kissed and Big Momma’s house.. so already he dosen’t have the best track record but somehow got worse because AFTER this film and it’s sequel he directed both live action Smurfs Movies and the universally hated Show Dogs, aka the film  that thought dog rape was funny. The fact this film isn’t out and out terrible is a miracle. 

Even more so because naturally, as Studios tend to do they interfered: The film was supposed to be more adult, cracking jokes about common things fans of the series growing up thought like Velma is Gay or Shaggy’s a stoner, and having both be fully true. But wanting to appeal to kids, Warner gradually lightned it, hence Craig, and Raja clearly having no shame gladly took it instead of you know.. standing his ground.  So Velma has a love intrest thrown in and her kiss with Daphne is gone, while Shaggy’s toke smoking was lowered to subtext.. because either of those things is bad apparently? I dunno the 2000′s were fucked. 

Point is THAT’S why these films are so tonally confused and why I don’t hold it agains the film now I know: It wasn’t James Gunn or even, as dumb as he is, Raja Gosnell’s fault that the film had some tones clashing when the studio was demanding it, instead of you know, thinking this through at all and realizing more kids cared about Scooby Doo than they would’ve josie and the pussy cats instead of bringing it up DURING production, when most of the adult stuff was in there. It’s also why the sequel has no real adult stuff, though it’s STILL damn good, but i’ll get to that some other day. 

The film was also shot at an actual theme park in australia. Neat. 

So yeah the film’s humor kind of ping pongs between knowing adult winks and kids stuff. We get Scooby dressing like a grandma in the same film shaggy enhales his demon possed love intrests breath like weed. The jokes themselves on average are pretty good: Some of my faviorites include the grandma scene, everything rowan atkinson does, Velma getting drunk off her ass, and the instructional video bit which is easily my favorite bit of the episode and one of my faviorite scooby doo jokes period:

This is even FUNNIER to me on rewatch, as we now know this is an instructional video for demons.. and that Scrappy clearly had enough problems with his demon horde to have to pay for this thing. It tis glorious.  However there also are also a few that HAVE NOT aged well, are very creepy at best and disgusting sexual assault at worst with Daphne getting her ass grabbed by the Luna Ghost at the start being treated as a joke and Fred oggling Daphne’s body when he’s in it being treated as a ha ha and not...

So yeah the humor’s USUALLY good, but the slipups are noticable and do bring things down a bit when they come by. So the humor is decent if mixed and the production’s a nightmare, how’s the plot? The Plot: Scoob, We’re Getting the Band Back Together!

I won’t be as through as usual because this is a 90 minute movie, I’m running behind as is and it’s 20 years old, 

We start with your standard mystery inc case with the Luna Goose, aka Old Man Incel who resented Pamela Anderson for not boning him. But Fred hogging the glory during the resulting News Cast leads the gang to start fighting over lingering tensions: Velma is tired of Fred hogging all the credit when she does most of the legwork solving things, Daphne is tired of being kidnapped and being mistreated by Velma and Freddy who laugh at the idea of her doing more, and Fred..

We’ll get to him later. Shaggy is the only one wanting to stick together, but no one’s having it and the group breaks apart and Matthew LIllard REALLY sells Shaggy’s heartbreak over his friends all abandoning him well. 

Two years later though, with Shaggy and Scooby naturally getting stoned and eating large quantities of food on the beach, have made peace with retirement, and have apparently had to duck tons of people coming to them to solve mysteries since they aren’t about that. The latest in that line is a man representing Emile Mondovarius, the owner of Spooky Island, a vast island resort and theme park. Naturally since it has spooky in the name the boys want nothing but Mondovarius does what honestly every previous guy coming to them should’ve done: offers them an all you can eat buffet.  Since they’ve done more traumatizing for Dog Treats, they agree and it soon turns out the entire gang was invited, though none of them but Shaggy and Scooby are happy to see each other. I will say one of my complaints about the film is it never tackles the emotions behind the breakup: while the teams slowly repairs there are never any outright apologizes or scenes of them recociling or scenes of Shaggy chewing them out for abandoning him due to their spat. It just skips over the emotional bits to either wave a joke for the kiddies around or scream 

Really the jokes aren’t bad, the film just has trouble with actual emotion or depth that could’ve been there and tries for it once in a while, but dosen’t really do anything with it. The gang splitting up’s a good concept, and at this point on Scooby Doo on Zombie Island had really used it, and that was one where they were clearly still close friends and were still in touch they just quit mystery solving for a while till Zombie Island happened. Mystery Incorpreated would finally give this story justice later: Instead of over a petty ego squabble, the gang broke up over underlying tensions: The revelations about Fred’s dad caused him to go try and find himself, Velma alienated herself by hiding things from them, and Shaggy was shipped off to Military School and Scooby doggy prison camp... thankfully the last two didn’t last and Scooby rescued Shaggy with a tank but the tension DIDN’T go away: While the gang mostly reunited, Velma took time to forgive them and also tried bringing in the friend/girlfriend she’d made in the meantime only for her friends to isolate her and throw her out while Daphne took her time to return due to being hurt by fred. It’s complex and good stuff versus here where it’s just “WE’RE APART BECAUSE WE HATES EACH OTHER. And now we’re NOT”. It’s just a waste of a good concept and i’ m glad the franchise got around to doing it right. 

But my gripes aside our heroes head to the resort and meet Mondevarious, who admits outright to having tricked then and with confronted with the gang being broken up, makes it clear he knews.  “That’s the thing about broken things.. you can put them back together.”

And so he did. He needs the Gang’s help as he’s worried about the island and something going wrong there: The teens are leaving polite, well behaved. and clearly not themselves as one reacts to an old friend by neck lifting him and tossing him aside. Something’s deeply wrong here and the gang’s intrest is piqued enough to stay though everyone but Shaggy is determined to solve it themselves out of ego. Mondvarius is played by Rowan Atkinson and while I watched the bean movie as a kid this is where I fell in love with the guy, with later watches of Blackadder confirming that in my college years. Rowan just brings a fun dorky energy to the character and a nice earnestness too but when he later takes a turn for the bad, he does that well too. Atkinson is HIGHLY underated in my opinon and easily the MVP of this film’s supporting cast.   So the investigation begins, and we get our supsects: The first we met on the plane, Mary Jane, a kind blonde played by Isla Fisher who got the job becasue Gosnel, in a rare good decision, saw how talented she was and while still picking Sara Michele Gellar for Daphne, made sure she had  a part. She’s a nice sweet girl who Shaggy falls for and Scooby’s annoyed by it.. though unlike earlier the film beats mystery inc easily here as it’s a more understandable conflict and dosen’t act like Dog Issues is a thing people says. Again i’ll get to that clusterfuck of an arc some day. The other two are N’Goo Tuna, a shady worker at the park who spouts off the legends of the island. In a nice twist, he’s NOT the vilian, as is obvious but is his right hand man. He also has his own right hand and muscle in Zarkos a cool looking Luchador and N’Goo’s muscle. Also N’Goo may be one of the worst names in Scooby Doo History, and that includes Dabba Doo. But the legend claims the island was once owned by demons who want revenge since the resort took the island from him. 

The other is probably my faviorite non Rowan Atkinson character, Voodoo Maestro, played by Miguel Nunez. He’s basically just a guy who lives on the fringes of the island and also hates the resort and tries using voodoo curses. He’s honestly a delight from his attempt to sacrifice a chicken (An already dead one at that), to his general hammy and annoyed at dealing with these teenagers demeanor. NAturally he has nothing to do with this but he’s still a fun addition and I wish he was in more scnenes than the two he gets.  But with what they’ve gathered the gang all end up at a spooky castle attraction, with Scooby and Shaggy of course being bribed by daphne while Velma and Fred show up indpeendntly and end  up finding the weird training video from earlier but all get caught when the traps are activiated> There’s also a farting contest which.. eh not funny to me but i’ve seen so much worse i’m not even remotely upset. But then the traps trigger though during the chaos Fred and Velma are forced to work together and finally start doing so, and Daphne finds a clue: A mysterious pyramid known as the damon righus and finally gets some, if not nearly enough, credit.  So the gang is back together.. even if it’s a tenative peace, the high from solving this and relay to their boss the suspects, including him, though Fred assures Mondovarius it’s just because he’s spooky and rowan’s character’s delight over that is fucking glorious.  So the gang enjoys some down time at the local bar, with Fred and Daphne doing their own look ins, Scooby and Shaggy eating and encountring mary again and Velma getting hit on by a dude while looking over the ritus, revealing it’s some sort of soul sucking aparatus, and going into their history... which is really just an excuse to bring Scrappy in who in this universe, is a horny egotistical little shit whose abandoned as a result. ANd before anyone boos he’s not a puppy here, he’s got.. dog dwarfisim.. which while .. how does that even work... means he’s a grown ass man and deserved this. We also get drunk velma and Linda Caredenlli is a delight

The night gets interupted by terrible cgi monsters, the aformentioned emon who soul suck most of the college kids present and also get fred and velma who both find out these are very much real. We also get the best song on the soundtrack, man with a hex. It slaps. But it makes good chase music as with Mondvarious, Fred and Velma captured, the rest of the gang and mary escape.  The next morning we get a surreal as hell scene as everyone’s partying, Fred’s talking in slang and Velma with clevage, thank you, is chatting up.. Sugar Ray? For those younger of you they were a band at the time. They were a big thing. Not half bad but faded away. They looked as 2000′s as hell though. WHy Smash Mouth gets all the memes and not them is beyond me. Look at lead singer Mark McGrath!It’s like the early 2000′s gained sentience and took a human form. But the gang is quickly forced to run from sugar ray, though they get Daphne in a deleted scene. Why it was deleted I dunno. Point is Shaggy, Scooby and Mary are all alone.. oh and Mary’s possessed. Shaggy and Scooby argue over it because Shaggy just thinks Scooby is jealous and while he is .. why would he lie about this? He’s as cowardly as you are. But Scooby falls through the floor, and Shaggy is now going solo but luckily finds his friends souls, and eveyrone elses in a massive cool looking vat and frees them all.  Velma, when the demon leaves her and confronts her, finds out sunlight kills the demons and saves Daphne from hers... only to find Fred in her body. Daphne is naturally horrified and we do get a great bodyswapping scene.

Our heroes reconvince on the beach where htey find the Maestro who explains what’s going on to a point, with the gang’s clues filling in the blanks: The ritus, which they stole back earlier, is used for a ritual that will allow the Demons to rule over the earth for “a thousand years of darkness” but it requires a pure soul to work. Cue our big bad talking Scooby into being their willing sacrifice since Scooby dooes not understand what a sacrifice is.  Shaggy naturally rallies the group to go save him after their understandably worried since they usually dealt with weirdos in costumes and not the apocalypse.. well okay Velma and Fred aren’t, Daphne dealt with this kind of thing once a week back in Sunnydale. So they set up a plan to destroy all the demons at once by unleashing the soul bath, setting them all loose and then using a spooky disco ball from one of the attractions rigged up over the ritual area to shine the light in. It’s classic scooby doo. 

Things naturally go wrong as while Shaggy goes to rescue scooby and makes up with him, he’s caught, so are fred and velma and they have to scramble, while Daphne looses a fight with the luchador up top while trying to let the light in to finish the trap. Meanwhile Shaggy saves Scooby’s soul just as Mondovarious sucks it out by shoving the guy.. revealing him to be a robot! DUN DUN DUN. And inside is Scrappy.. which you all probably knew already but try to act suprise who wanted to conquer the world as revenge for the gang abandoning him and because again, in this universe he’s kind of an asshole. He absorbs the souls gathered so far and merges with the damon ritus, because we’re operating on video game rules now apparently, so final boss time.  But we get a great climax as Scrappy chases scooby, Daphne goes buffy on Zarkos ass , and as a result he shatters the glass and lets the light in releasing the disco ball the kill the demons.. man I love that I get to type things like that. Scooby removes the ritus and defeats his nephew and the day is saved. Velma hooks up with random guy, Daphne and Fred get together, I die inside a little and Shaggy and Mary Jane bond. At the press Fred does his good deed for the movie by letting Velma explain things and get the spotlight and the group have firmly reunited. THE END. Overall it’s a solid plot, that works well, comes together in the end and was well put together, it’s more the filling that causes it to tilt back and forth a bit, but overlal outside of the issue I mentioned it’s a good scooby doo plot. While some have pointed out it is similar to zombie island, a case reuniting the gang, the person who brought them there wanting to sacrifice them, or just scooby here, monsters being real, it works because everything else is so different. But since there’s more to break down and it’s easier to give it it’s own section let’s look at...

THE CHARACTERS: NOT HALF BAD, FRED CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF. 

So we’re down to character.. and since there’s a blonde, preeening, selfish, arrogant, sleazy, sexist, obnoxious, loud mouthed, useless elephant in the room, let’s start with Fred. And to quote it’s always sunny....

Yeah so that fury of a thousand crashing waves (Cracks Knuckles): Fred is the worst part of this movie, the worst version of the character across the entire franchise that i’ve seen with the sincre doubt that there is ANY version worse than this. Everything I said above is true and THEN some. He is one of the most unlikable characters i’ve seen in a film that wasn’t INTENDED to be. There’s just NOTHING to like about him. Nothing. He treats his “Friends” like garbage, all four of them: He basically ignores shaggy and scooby at best and treats them as if they were nothing. For Velma he’s your classic power abusing douche who pushes her to the side and often steals the credit for things she did. He’s still a good mystery solver, but he acts like he does all the work to the press and takes all the credit when Velma works as hard as he does if not harder. And worst of all is Daphne, who he basically either treats like some moron who gets kidnapped due to incompetence and not because creepy old dudes want to feel her up, which given the intro is VERY likely the reason she’s the resident victim of the group, and not like a person, or like a pair of boobs and legs he wants to bang or feel up creepily while he’s in her body. For fuck’s sake his reaction to finding out he’s in her body is a creepy and smug “I can see myself naaaakeddd” If that dosen’t make you want to smack him get off my blog. And they get together in the end! 

Who who wanted that. I genuinely want the presumibly original ending where Daphne and Velma hook up and Fred falls off a pier and is never seen again. The acting does not help. While the other four gang members are expertly cast Fred was given to Freddy Prinze Junior, who made a career out of playing arrogant dicks who are somehow the main character so I can’t fault the casting but I can fault that he can’t delver any line without that smug air of trying to be cool douche and it’s at it’s worst with Fred since Fred’s already written as the biggest creepiest douche in the world and Freddy somehow makes it WORSE. He also has zero chemstiry with Daphne, which would be weird given he and Sarah Michelle Gellar had dated for 2 years at this point and as of this writing have been together for 20 overall and have two wonderful kids together... but given how badly written Fred is here, I can’t blame either of them. And i’m sure FPJ is a swell guy, loves his kids loves his wife seems like a really plesant guy, nothing against him as a person, but at least at this point in his career he wasn’t very good. And I am actually planning on trying to seek out one of his later works in his career to see if he’s gotten better in recent years, and willing to give him the benifit of a doubt that he probably has. I just don’t like him here, and while the script does most of the work he only makes it worse.And works before this (Pup Named Scooby Doo) and after this (Mystery Incorperated) would prove you can give fred a personality that’s not dick tip, so fuck this character, fuck the writing.. and I hope Freddy is having a happy halloween with his loving wife and children, seriously I meant it I have nothing against him as a person. A terrible actor can still be a WONDERFUL guy. 

Now that’s thankfully put to bed, let’s pivot over to Shaggy, whose easily the best of the cast. Matthew Lillard looks the part pefectly, has the right combination of heart and goofus and has some great comedic timing. Granted Scream had already proven the guy’s got genuine talent, but still he’s great here and is currently playing Shaggy in most films and productions, except Scoob which.. was far from it’s only mistake but easily the biggest. There’s not much else to say: the guy IS Shaggy and is the only person whose taken up the roll to equal Kasey Casem in it. As for how he’s written.. he’s basically the same and apart from one line of him wanting to leave everyone to their deaths, which feels like it was added later, he’s written really well and is easily the most likeable of the group. 

Scooby is alright. Not the best version but funny and charming enough when he needs to be and while I hated the CGI at one point.. it’s honestly not that bad. It’s not GREAT, but time has actually been very good to it both in how it’s held up and in the fact we’ve gotten SO MUCH WORSE with so much better techlogies. I mean.. Cats exists.. Marmaduke Exists.. the Bill Murray Garfield exists. This was offputting at the time but now it’s just okay. But character wise he’s good and again not much diffrent. 

Velma is the second best casting of the movie. Played by Linda Cardenelli, who i’ve harbored a crush on for a good few decades now and admire mostly for her talent and charm, Linda kills the roll and easily slips into it as easily as Matt did, and while not picking it up full time like he did, still did it a few times afterword and played hot dog water in mystery incorperated, so she did finally get to play a Lesbian Velma it just took a while. And while Velma being gay is kind of sterotyping, it would’ve been nice to have been kept in instead of edited out for bullshit reasons. But overal her character is decent: While she ALSO bullies and belittles daphne like fred, unlike fred it comes less from just being a douche and more from insecurity. As her scene at the bar makes clear she feels undervalued like the other, like the nerd who the cool kids LET hang out with them instead of part of the team. While it dosen’t make her treatment of Daphne OKAY, it makes Velma understandable. We also get Velma Clevage which.. okay not sure if the world needed that but whatever. Point is it’s throughly likeable portryal that I wish got some character growth.  Finally out of the main 5 there’s Daphne, whose alright. Not as good as the other two, as it feels they lean a bit too heavily on her having taken self defense and wanting ot be tougher, but Sarah Michelle Gellar gives her a ton of charm and likeablity that her husband’s character sadly lacks. There’s just a fun, adorable energy to daph that ends up coupling with her buffy style badassery at the end and Sarah plays both beautifully. The script didn’t give her a ton to work with, though that’s the same for all four of htem, but Sarah really made the character work and made her somewhat memorable despite not being as good as Linda or Matthew. Basically not the best, but still a comfortable third ahead of scooby doo and jackass jones. 

As for the rest of the cast, Rowan Attkinson i’ve covered and is utterly fantastic as is the Voodoo Maestro, and both should get hteir own hbo max spinoff together. The minons.. stupid name and luchadoor are decent enough, nothign special but they have presence and do the job of goon well. And Mary Jane is alright.. the joke is WAY too on the nose to be funny and she’s mostly just there to be sweet, but she’s harmless. Not good but not bad.  So finally we have our big bad, Scrappy. And i’m.. mixed about this. On one hand, Scott Innes, who it turns out is also from Missouri good on you dude!, does a terrific job and I couldn’t tell it wasn’t don messick as Scrappy and he plays him as evil great. On the other.. it’s just kinda goofy. Out of all the tips of hte hat to scooby stuff this feels the most over the top. Scrappy was hated, including by james gunn.. so he’s the bad guy. It’s just a bit on the nose, and the twist is pretty easily teligraphed since Scrappy suspciously is mentioned in one scene so him showing up at all is pretty easy to see coming. It’s not terible but it’s not great. His demon minons also just suck.. the designs are wonky and their cgi, unlike scooby and scrappy’s, is just REALLY bad and dated, and even as a kid I never liked them. 

FINAL THOUGHTS:  Scooby Doo is a decent but messy movie. The clashing tones, dated humor and godawful version of fred drag it down at times, and it’s very clear this had a lot of hands in the pot. But.. I still enjoy it. It’s not the best scooby ever, tha’ts mystery incorpeated, but it has great atmosphere, some good ideas, an utterly spectacular with one exception cast, and some really funny jokes. I genuinely feel the film is overhated when it’s a unique, weird and wonderful slice of Scooby. For better or worse there’s no other Scooby doo property quite like it, and that’s what makes it so fun. And it has enough good performances and jokes to smooth out the edges. It’s not the best, it’s a mess.. but sometimes a mess is fun and I like this flim for being a fun mess I can enjoy with my nieces and talk about to all of you. And sometimes that’s all you need.  Thank you for reading this. If you like this you can comission your own review: 5 bucks for a tv episode, 15 for a movie, 10 for an hour long special, and 5 dollars off when you order more than one episode of a show at a time. Just send me a direct message or ask on here and we’ll get started. Until then you can check out my backlog of reviews, check this space every monday for ducktales reviews, and VOTE DAMMIT VOTE. Until we meet again it’s been a pleasure. Play us out Atomic Fireballs, it’s been a wonderful halloween. 

[khoicesbyk]

The Nanny Affair

The Vacation Of A Lifetime. Part 1.

Author’s Note: This fanfic right here is based off of the preview for Chapter 14. This will be three parts. First is what happens before they get to Italy. And the second and third parts will be what happens once they land. Talley Ho! *in my Sherlock Holmes voice*

Song and Story inspiration: I Feel It Coming-The Weeknd.

***Rated: Mature 18+. Contains sexual content and strong language. You know? The usual from me. 😁

***Bolded and/or italicized words are conversations and thoughts of the characters.

***Characters: Sam Dalton (LI) and Krystal Parker (MC)

***All Characters and names (except MC) are property of Pixelberry.

***Trigger Warning: Aviophobia aka a fear of flying. Read at your own discretion.***

Current Word Count: 1,732 words. Personal victory for me! I normally do over 2,000 words. 😁👏🏾🙌🏾💃🏾

Krystal stood there in the kitchen frozen in place. She couldn’t believe what she just heard Sam say.

“Krystal, you okay there?”, he asked her.

“Yeah…I think so. Did you just say that we’re going to Italy?”, she asked.

“Yeah. That’s exactly what I said.”, he replied.

“Uh huh! That’s what I thought you said. So, why are you turning your business trip to Italy into a family trip to Italy again? Because that part I missed.”, she said to him.

“You missed it because; I haven’t explained that part yet. Like I said before; you were right about me being a coward. I was just too stubborn to admit it. Not out loud. Not to you. And certainly not to myself. But being called on it; was enough for me to realize that I need you. I need you near me. I can’t even function properly, without you. And besides; I was kidding myself. I can’t leave my kids behind for 2 months. Business trip to Italy or no business to Italy; I can’t leave my boys. So, get packed because we’re going to Italy. We leave in 2 hours.”, he explained.

“Okay. I’ll go get packed…I’m going to Italy. Wow!”, she replied in a slightly nervous tone.

“I thought you’d be a lot more excited than this.”, he told her.

“No I am. I’m very excited to go. I’m just not exactly excited about flying to get there.”, she says to him.

“If you’re worried about flying with Sofia then; you can stop worrying. She’s flying in with her dad and brother.”, he told her.

“No it’s not that. It has nothing to do with Sofia. I’m not excited about flying because I have a not so small fear of flying?”, she says to him.

“You have Aviophobia?”, he asked. She nodded in response.

“Krystal. You know I would never let anything happen to you, right?”, he asked her.

“I-I know…I…it’s just that…I-I don’t like not being on solid ground. And being 50,000 feet in the air is my biggest nightmare. I know that I should’ve told you sooner but; I didn’t think it mattered because, we weren’t flying anywhere.”, she answered.

That’s when he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She all but melted into a puddle of nothing, in his arms.

“Look at me. Nothing will happen to you, I swear. I won’t let anything happen to you. You don’t have to be afraid. I’m here. I’ll be there with you. Me and the boys. We’ll be there. You don’t have to be afraid.”, he said to her as he rubbed her back. He wanted to calm her fear. “I will never let anything hurt you.”

She felt safe in his arms. She felt home in his arms. “I’m okay. I’ll be okay. Thank you.”, she told him. He kissed her forehead and said to her, “I know you will be. Go, get packed. I’ll get the boys ready.”

2 hours later they were at Dulles Airport; walking to the Dalton Enterprises private jet. As they got closer to the plane; her fear started to take over. Sam took notice at her growing fear so; he decided to introduce her to the flight crew.

“Krystal; I’d like to introduce you to Frank Walton and David Young. They’re the pilots. And this is Wesley Caine, Andrea Baker, Dina Campbell and Xavier Trent. They’re the flight attendants. They will make sure that we will be completely safe.”, he explained to her; in hopes that it quell her growing fear.

“Everyone; this is Krystal Parker. She has a slight fear of flying; and wanted to assure her that she’s in VERY capable hands.”, he said as he introduced her to them.

“Krystal! You’re afraid to fly?”, Mickey asked.

“Yes, I am.”, she answered.

“So that’s why dad had us bring our airplane buddies!”, Mason said as he snuggled his airplane plushie.

“You two are my airplane buddies.”, she told them with a smile.

“Ms. Parker; I can most certainly assure you that are and will be safe. We will make sure of that.”, Frank said with a warm smile.

“Shall we Mr. Dalton?”, he asked Sam. Once Sam nodded they boarded the plane. And soon; they flying over the Atlantic towards Naples.

Krystal was fine as long as she didn’t look out of a window and controlled her breathing. So, to do that she focused on the boys; who were at the time watching Disney+ on their iPads. And although he was on a work call in the back; Sam still made sure to check on her and that she was comfortable. He wanted her and the boys to be comfortable.

After the boys fell asleep in their bunks; Sam went to check on her.

“How are you feeling?”, he asked her.

“Honestly, I’m struggling. It was fine at first because I had the boys to focus on; but now that they’re sleep, I-I-I’m back to being terrified. My anxiety is screaming and it’s getting harder to control my shaking”, she admitted to him.

“Come with me.”, he told her as took her hand. She followed him to his cabin in the back. He walked slowly with her so she wouldn’t be too afraid. As soon as the door closed; she collapsed into his arms.

“Hey! Hey! Hey! Shhhhh…it’s okay. I’m here. I got you. You’re safe.”, he whispered in her ear. He rocked her as she trembled and cried. “I know you’re scared Krystal. But; I promise you that you’re doing so good. I promise you that it’ll all be over soon.”

“I know I shouldn’t be scared; but I can’t…I can’t…I can’t help it. It’s an irrational and irrelevant fear I know but—“, she started to say through tears; before he interjected, “nothing about your fear is irrelevant nor irrational. You know that. I would never criticize you for being scared.”

She was able to start calming herself down; because of him. His strength. His warmth. Feeling his arms around her. Feeling him rub her back. All of this is what eventually calmed her down.

“Here sit down.”, he told her as they both sat down on the edge of the bed. She clung to him tightly. “Thank you for helping me. You didn’t have to do any of this for me.”

“Don’t say that. Of course I had to. I didn’t want you to feel like I don’t care. I might’ve been a little busy but; that doesn’t mean I wasn’t thinking about you.”, he said to her.

“What else can I do to make you feel better?”, he asked her.

After thinking about it for a few seconds; she told him, “Sam you’ve already done enough for me; but if you want to do one more thing, you can do this.”

She brought his lips to hers for a very searing kiss. He wrapped his right arm around her waist; while tangling his left hand in her hair, pulling her close. He wanted her; just as badly as she wanted him.

“I need you. Right here, right now!”, he told her in low growl.

“Take me…”, she begged him.

That was all he needed to hear before; pulling her into his lap. Soon; their clothes were in a lazy pile and they were higher up on the bed. They couldn’t keep their hands off of each other.

“God, you are the most beautiful woman in the world.”, he told her; before kissing his way down her jawline, her neck and stopping at her breasts. In between pleasing her breasts; he asks her, “what do you want Krystal? Tell me and it’s yours. I am yours.”

“I need to feel you inside me! I want you inside me!”, she tells him. Hearing the desperation in her voice; sent chills down his spine.

“Your wish is my command…”, he told her; before devouring her mouth again. He lined himself up with her sweet spot, wrapped her legs around his waist and with a thrust of his hips plunged inside her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and whimpered into his shoulder, as he took her.

“God damn you feel so good! So damn good!”, he said as he relentlessly pounded her. Every sound she made was like a shot of adrenaline to him. Every time he kissed her; he sent shockwaves running through her. Pulses radiated throughout her body every time he touched her.

“Yesssssssssss Sam! Take! Me! Just like that! Yes! Just! Like! That!”, she cried out; while clawing at his back. The pain from her nails digging in his skin; intensified his stroke.

“Yeah that’s a good girl! Tell me that dick feels good! Tell me that you want this!”, he growled in her ear. As if on cue she replied, “give it to me! Fuck yesssssssssss! Give it to me! It feels so good! You feel so good! Don’t you stop! Don’t ever stop!”

She was steadily unraveling. And she was getting dangerously close to her climax; and so was he. He was giving her exactly what she needed from him.

“Sam! I’m so close! Ohhhhhhhh God! I’m about to…”, she told him as she struggled to hang on. Her orgasm was right at its peak.

“That’s it kitten! Cum for me! There you go! Let it out! Let it all out!”, he encouraged her. And with that she gave in; and let her orgasm take ahold of her. Her body shook and her eyes rolled back as she rode the ginormous internal wave of pleasure.

And Sam was not too far behind her.

“Shit! I’m about to…fuck! It’s here baby! And it’s all for you!”, he said through gritted teeth. With last thrust of his hips and a deep guttural groan; he let go. His body went rigid as he emptied himself into her. Once he was done; they were both exhausted and satisfied. He laid down next to her and held her close. She laid in his arms shivering because of the aftershocks.

“Are you alright?”, he managed to ask her.

“Yes. I’m fine. Well as fine as I can be. Thanks to you.”, she replied; her voice barely above a whisper.

“Good. You should get some rest. We’ll be landing in Napoli soon.”, he told her. With a sweet goodnight kiss; she was soon fast asleep in his arms.

@lucy-268 @txemrn @choicesficwriterscreations

Stay tuned for Part 2!

😘

K.

[dudeandduchess]

Rating/Genre: NSFW, Modern AU Characters: Rengoku Shinjurō x F!Reader, Mentions of Sanemi x F!Reader Chapters: 2/10 Summary: Shinjurō and (Y/n) are in a D/s arrangement, but he wants more so he tries to lay the world at her feet in the hopes that she would say yes to being his. Unfortunately, (Y/n) shoots him down every time, since she’s not swayed by his money or influence.But Shinjurō is more determined than ever to keep her, so he will stop at nothing to keep her for himself. Warnings: Smut, Daddy Kink, Spanking, Creampie, Breeding Kink, Dirty Talk, D/s Themes, Oral Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Unsolicited (but not unwanted) Dick Pic

NOTE: Thank you so much for all the feedback, bbys! I honestly didn’t expect this to get the attention that it’s gotten so far. LIke, omg. I’m so happy. And just... thank you! 💜✨

***

(Y/n) raced through the dark streets, revving up her car’s engine as she overtook two cars on the highway. Normally, she would be much more careful because she didn’t want to get caught for speeding, but she wanted to get back to her house and change as soon as humanly possible.

If it meant seeing Shinjurō sooner, then she would risk it and break a few speeding laws. After all, it wasn’t something that her PR team couldn’t sweep under the rug.

She shifted gears the moment she passed the two other cars, going up to the sixth gear to increase her speed— effectively leaving her non-competitors behind in the dust. And in no time at all, they were nothing but a speck in her rearview mirror.

Had her lover seen that little stunt, however, she was sure that the self-satisfied smirk on her face wouldn’t even dare to show itself. He would most likely punish her for being so reckless, even though she was more than capable of handling herself; though, she didn’t really mind his punishments.

From its magnetic holder on the dashboard, her phone lit up with a notification which read:

My cock’s so hard, baby.

She almost swerved right into a barrier when she read it, because it had her feeling all sorts of horny— enough to make her mind focus on nothing but Shinjurō’s dick for a brief second.

And, to make matters worse— or better— her phone pinged once more with a preview of an image that made her mouth go dry. Immediately, her index finger swiped the message open and typed in her passcode.

“Fuck me,” (Y/n) muttered under her breath, while her gaze flickered between the picture of Shinjurō’s cock on her phone, to the road ahead of her.

The head was already leaking precum, while his hand gripped the base of his erection to show her that he was already getting started without her. The vein that ran along his length was so pronounced as well— making her lick her lips subconsciously. She wanted nothing more than to have that inside her— either in her mouth or her pussy, or even her ass; she didn’t really mind as long as Shinjurō fucked her.

At that thought, she shook her head and focused on the road instead of her own lust. It was difficult, since her eyes always strayed over to the picture on her phone— but she locked the device to help her focus on her main task of getting home in one piece.

After a few more minutes, and haphazard drifting around sharp corners, (Y/n) finally made it to her sizeable home in the middle of Azabu.

To say that she was impatient as she waited for a housekeeper to open the gates for her was an understatement. Her fingers drummed against the steering wheel incessantly, while her eyes stayed on the dormant phone on her dashboard.

Her hands itched to reach out and reply to her lover, but she didn’t want to frustrate herself even more. Because to feed in to his teasing was to fuel her own desires, and she didn’t need herself feeling so overly horny while making the half hour drive to their home.

(Y/n) hit the horn twice once more, before sighing huffily and turning off the lights as well as the engine. She got her purse from the passenger seat, then threw her phone in it, before exiting the car and locking it behind her.

She looked up at the tall gate in front of her, then at the ode to modern Japanese architecture that was her house— before sighing once more. If she were to be honest, she preferred the warmer aura that hers and Shinjurō’s home radiated, as opposed to the cold and foreboding atmosphere that the house in front of her exuded.

If she could live in Saitama permanently with the Rengoku Group’s Chairman himself— without being judged for it— then she would have done so in a heartbeat.

But that was nothing but a pipe dream. She wasn’t deluded enough to think that he wouldn’t eventually get tired of her.

Her heels clacked against the pavement, as she walked up to the smaller side gate and pressed the doorbell incessantly. After waiting for almost a minute, she was close to bursting with irritation that she wanted to yell and throw a tantrum, but she held herself back as one of her housekeepers answered.

“Oh my, (Y/n)-sama,” The older woman gasped out; her words colored with fear as she saw the dark look on her mistress’ features. “The young miss is here. Hurry.”

No matter how hard she tried to keep herself from doing so, she still found herself glaring at the older woman. Normally, she was nice and extremely considerate of her housekeepers and other employees, but one thing she hated was being kept waiting.

“Just let me in,” The (L/n) heiress growled out, before adding, “Please.”

The moment that she heard the lock on the gate unlatch itself, she marched through and closed it behind her— unmindful of the barrage of people headed towards her with panic clearly displayed on their features.

She wanted to be mad, as they weren’t alert enough to have heard her blaring her horn in such a quiet area but— at the same time— she wasn’t so stuck up in her ass that she didn’t think that they had nothing else to do other than wait around for her. Partly, it was her fault for not telling anyone that she was already on her way back.

But it wasn’t the time for that discussion at that moment. So, she pressed her car keys into hands the first person to reach her, before saying, “Please take the car inside and put it in the garage. And also, please get the white Civic ready.”

***

After changing into less flashy clothes— which consisted of a plain sundress and sandals— she immediately set off towards Saitama, with just one short text to Shinjurō:

I’ll be home soon, daddy.😘

And she was. In her haste to see him, she cut her travel time by ten minutes. However, she didn’t even bother to stow the car in the garage— as it was seemingly plain for the purpose of not arousing suspicion.

Instead, she left it out in the driveway; out in plain view next to Shinjurō’s grey 2019 Mazda 6. She was confident enough to park it out there, even though their home didn’t have an actual gate, but merely had high concrete fences to ward people off their property.

Almost the entirety of Japan knew that she drove a Porsche Panamera— and had owned much flashier cars before that— which stood to reason that no one would think that she would drive a seemingly-plain 2018 Honda Civic.

It wasn’t part of her plan to get it at first, but when Shinjurō had pointed out how her car was going to be easily recognizable, she immediately made an investment— by using one of her housekeepers to purchase the car under their name.

The plan wasn’t entirely foolproof, as it could still be traced back to her if the media tried hard enough, but it was the best solution that they could come up with— so that (Y/n) wouldn’t have to rely on a driver or anyone else to drop her off.

(Y/n)’s fingers fiddled with the key fob in her right hand— more in restless anticipation than anything else— before locking the car behind her.

She then fished for the keys to the front door inside her bag and quickly entered the house. No time was wasted after that, as she locked the door behind her and immediately stripped herself of her clothing.

“I’m home!” Her voice rang out in the seemingly empty home, as she placed her purse on the table right by the front door.

Shamelessly, (Y/n) flung her dress to the floor, before unhooking her bra clasp and throwing the lacy material at her feet as well. She would have to pick those up in the morning— but she couldn’t care less about those now.

All the while, her feet brought her closer and closer to hers and Shinjurō’s bedroom on the second floor, and she could feel her anticipation building up inside her. Because, after almost two weeks without seeing each other, she was going to finally be with him again.

With only her panties on— the very ones that her lover claimed were his favorite— the young woman entered their bedroom.

Shinjurō’s cock was still so hard even though almost an hour had passed since he’d sent the dick pic, since he merely kept stroking it to keep it ready for his baby.

Slowly, a smirk lifted the corners of his lips, and he crooked his right hand’s index finger at her. “Come here, baby.”

Nothing and no one could have kept (Y/n) from following her lover’s orders, even if they tried.

She practically skipped over to where he was on the bed, before moving to straddle his hips. “Hi, Daddy.”

Slowly, the older man’s hands made their way into her hair— tangling in the soft strands before tugging gently. He then pulled her down for a chaste kiss. “Did you miss me?”

“I did, Daddy. So much.” (Y/n) nodded, and leaned down once more to taste his lips a second time.

“Were you a good little slut for me? Did you touch yourself while I was gone?”

“I didn’t. I promise. I was a good little slut for you.” She purred, before nipping at her lover’s lips. Her heart was racing so uncontrollably in her chest with just a kiss from him, and that was one of the things that she loved the most about being with him— simply being near him sent her heart out of control, in a way that Sanemi never could.

“Really now?” Shinjurō chuckled, as a self-satisfied grin made its way onto his lips. “Turn around and show Daddy that tight cunt.”

Instantaneously, (Y/n) got off of her lover’s hips, before getting down on all fours near the end of the bed. And she almost mewled when she felt Shinjurō’s warm hands squeeze the globes of her ass, before taking her panties by the sides and pulling them down to her knees.

“Fuck, baby. You’re so fucking wet already. Such a filthy fucking slut.” The older man growled, before bringing a hand down and landing a spank on one of her ass cheeks.

The action made (Y/n) gasp in surprise, before devolving into quiet whimpers when her lover began landing hit after hit on each of her cheeks. Every sufficient slap had her gripping the sheets tighter, as her toes curled in pleasure.

She’d mentally counted up to ten, when she felt his warm breath fanning across her slit. “I’ve missed this pretty little cunt.”

And with that, Shinjurō licked a stripe up her folds, teasing her entrance with the tip of his tongue before moving down to take her clit into his mouth. He gently nipped at the tiny nub, playing it perfectly with his teeth, while his tongue flicked it back and forth.

(Y/n)’s moans were so sinful and loud, as the room was soundproofed specifically because Shinjurō loved to hear the noises she made while being pleasured.

“Please, Daddy! I’m so close,” She pleaded desperately, as Shinjurō didn’t let up on his assault on her pussy. Her thighs quivered uncontrollably, while her hands pulled at the sheets beneath her, so he decided to have mercy on her and let her cum.

After all, he loved his baby too much to let her suffer any longer.

His fingers joined in the foray; with his index and middle finger sliding inside her tight cunt and making scissoring motions to prepare her for his cock. However, it was when he curled them and began pumping his hand that she let out the loudest moan he’d heard from her.

Apparently, being subjected to almost two weeks without any sexual relief had taken its toll on her.

“That’s it, baby. Tell Daddy how much you want it, and then I’ll give you my cock,” Shinjurō muttered gruffly, as he kept pumping his fingers in and out of her. “You want that, don’t you? To take Daddy’s dick like the cockslut that you are.”

“Yes, Daddy! I want you to feel your cock inside me. Please fill me up with your cum. Please!” (Y/n) cried, almost desperate as her last plea came out like a sob from her lips.

And in turn, Shinjurō relented and pulled his fingers out of her— lifting them up to his lips and sucking them clean— before gripping his cock with one hand, while the other held her left hip. Then slowly, he pushed the head of his dick inside her; which earned a relieved moan from his younger lover.

“Thank you, Daddy,” She murmured through blissed out sighs. “Thank you. Fuck-”

The last exclamation had been gasped out, as he pushed his cock all the way in and hit the entrance of her womb in that one move. And slowly, he pulled his dick back out— letting the head drag along her tight walls— before thrusting back in, and slowly establishing a rough and borderline punishing pace.

Every thrust had her ass jiggling so beautifully, that Shinjurō couldn’t resist not landing a few more smacks to the already-red cheeks.

(Y/n) was close to delirious with pleasure, as her lover worked her expertly. Both hands were once again on either side of her hips, as he practically slammed himself inside her. Her arms shook with the strain of being fucked so roughly until, eventually, they gave in.

It left her with her cheek pressed against the mattress, but she couldn’t care less if her makeup got ruined. She would rather have had it ruined through sex than through anything else, really.

And when she thought things couldn’t get any better, Shinjurō leaned down over her and pressed his lips against her shoulder. He then trailed kisses up to the crook of her neck, which highly contradicted the brutal pace that he was fucking her in, before biting down on her sensitive skin.

It wasn’t a hard bite, but it was enough to have her eyes rolling to the back of her head— as her neck was one of the most sensitive areas on her body.

“Fuck, baby. I’m going to fill you up with so much cum that you get pregnant,” The older man muttered gruffly against her skin, then trailed his lips up to her ear before biting down on the shell of it. “You want that don’t you? To get pregnant with my child, so that we can stop fucking hiding.”

The last bit shook (Y/n) out of her sex-induced reverie, but she could only gasp as her lover readjusted the angle of his hips so that he was brushing against all of the right spots inside her with every drag of his cock along her walls.

She couldn’t deny that she wanted that— badly— but she also knew that it wasn’t the wisest choice for both of them. Being together publicly would cause so much controversy; and that would spell disaster for both of their careers.

Still, she didn’t have the heart to tell him no— at least, not while she was getting fucked within an inch of her life.

Once more, a hazy cloud of lust fogged up her brain, and she found herself moaning so wantonly as Shinjurō kept fucking her. Every thrust brought her closer to her own orgasm, until the tight coil in her abdomen felt like it had snapped.

Her pussy clamped down on his cock, while her walls pulsed around him while her orgasm coursed through her— as if trying to milk all the cum out of him. Still, through that, Shinjurō kept moving his hips as he tasted his own release on the tip of his tongue.

The hands on either side of (Y/n) balled themselves up into fists, while the man above her pushed his hips flush against her ass— if only to press the head of his cock right against her womb as he painted her walls with his cum.

Completely breathless and nowhere near sated, Shinjurō leaned down once more and pressed his lips to the back of (Y/n)’s neck. “I’ve missed you, baby.”

Masterlist

[grlfriends]

revolutionary girl utena review

ep 1-5

the plot is actually kinda different from what I thought ?? in my mind the plot was: utena was a girl in a princess school who each and every princess would be "conquered" (for a lack of better words rn) in a ceremonial duel by a prince who fancied them, maybe she didnt wanna wanna marry anyone or she liked Anthy already but anyway in my mind utena showed up in the ceremony with duel clothing and then, in a very brave tm like-scene, she would openly declare she refused to be conquered by anyone and tbh I'm not even sure how Anthy would come into the plot... but back into what actually happened in the episodes everything so far is very introductory and just showing what mechanics will be explored further down the line I think?? the op is really good too

also every boy so far reminds me so much of knights of the zodiac?? maybe it's just the design I guess...) and nanami can get these hands, jealousy is a disease and she's the sickest person on earth for all I know

dont ask me why bit I just feel like room of mirrors - gfriend has a very well fitting vibe for it but I'm not exactly sure why hm.... 🤔🤔

ep 6-12

ok so why does this school just have random animals around 😐 I could understand the horse but a bull and a kangaroo?? what ...

touga just says the most random dramatic things and then just casually says anyone who believes in friendship is a fool ?? the guy wouldnt last a day in the naruto universe tbh, he kinda irks me in some way but I'm not sure why so I'll live with this strange feeling for a while I guess

↳ okay so watching ep 10 made me especially kinda creeped out, I know I've watched only 10 eps so far but like can he fall downstairs and break a neck or something already ...

also haha what if I watched that bet on it fmv and gave myself a bunch of spoilers would that be funny or what 😍 this is why i cant have nice things yall.... hope my memory goes to shit when sleep so I dont remember about it this week while I finish it

I feel like the main thing on the episodes are parallels, one way or another I always feel like they're setting up parallels and giving me clues for a bigger picture and a deeper plot arc that is still to come and the bet on it fmv just made this impression stronger, also I wanna say it's done in a good way, one that is both mysterious (??) and "honey you've got a big storm coming" at the same time 🤔🤔 much to think about honestly

↳ just saw ep 11 and even though I already knew this was coming sooner or later it still felt like crap seeing utena lose to dick head, at the end of the episode when he says anthy was always just reflecting utena's own wishes for himemiya (in another way bc I dont remenber the exact words) it felt like 😐 bc yes I knew that (the way she was working her thoughts was simply a copy and paste of what utena was saying) at all time I kept those essays about anthy in my head, I dont think theyll be truly relatable to what I'm seeing rn but yeah anthy rights (even though I know you betray/cheat on utena down the line bc of the bet on it fmv but I'm sure you had your own motivation)

↳ saw ep 12 bc I just couldnt handle being in a cliffhanger and yeah it happened what I absolutely thought it would lmao not that it was that difficult to foresee but yeah, I kinda liked how utena did it for her instead of being like "oh I wanna save anthy from touga" and treating her like a damsel in distress (I know that's kinda her position as the rose bride for what I've been told so far and that this is a subject spoken about in many many essays on tumblr but yeah) bc so far she's been treated as a trophy and a way to get something else, for the green haired guy it was a way to see something eternal, for miki it was a way to hold on into his "shining thing" and for touga it seems (so far) like a way to manipulate (just like he does with nanami) and just mark his position as above everyone else as he seems to view himself?? man I might be saying random stuff rn but it kinda does makes sense in my mind with the information I've had to this point

ep 13-25

honestly 😐😐 through 9 whole episodes I felt like they were trying to make the side characters deeper and show their hidden face and motivations but it felt so shallow...... not even actually shallow, just not deep enough that it would make me care about these characters and the fact there was no actual build to showing us why we're getting to know these characters backgrounds was just kinda meh too, didnt really help that all episodes had all the same formula and the same timing just for the developers made in those episodes be forgotten at the end and also just that pink haired guy could be like "ah failure again", it felt like watching the same episode over and over again, it was really tiring and like?? girl help I do not care about these characters at all, I feel like it could have been done well (like the keiko ep in comparison to the furuba chapter that deals with the yuki appreciation (??) club president graduating.... the way this ep was done and setup didn't really bring me any emotions) overall not to my taste and tbh I feel like I could have skipped all those episodes except for maybe the miki and juri one so 😑

all nanami focused episodes are the worst so far, she's so boring and I cant stand now annoying she is, the diary episode?? the cow episode?? the episode when tsuwabiki fuels with utena?? honestly I know they're trying to show me a better and different side of her but it just doesnt!! work!! bc i feel no sympathy for her, my biggest wish rn is her and touga just disappearing and no more filler episodes🗣🗣

I thought akio was utena's prince?? but apparently he's just anthy's brother and like.. I'm do done with his little talks with utena and yadda yadda, I just wanna see their duel is that too much to ask I'm dying over here (if this lenga lenga continues until ep 25 i will be so mad bc why were so many episodes wasted on such boring and and not necessary side characters backstories?? idc about them at all man aaaaaaaaaa)

↳ ep 25 was good finally we got what we deserve boys 😭😭😭😭😭 can utena just beat up akio already I'm tired of his ass, he exhales both "I'm a feminist I even take women studies classes #herstory" and "if she breathes she's a thot" energy also he has 0 style that mullet is simply horrible I bet there's a hairstylist community who considers him a criminal bc like 😐 it is simply so bad (q bit less when it's tied up but when it's all lose jesus Christ)

also touga thinks he's suuuuch a genius, sooo smart like king, I do not care about you at all can you shut the fuck up please and can we tall about the pink haired guy episode?? wack. honestly thought it would be more emotional or something, I binge watched 12 episodes with his ugly haircut face and did not even feel a thing he can choke I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ANTHY TAKING A SWORD OUT OF UTENA'S CHEST??? OSCAR WORTHY KINGS❗❗❗and then her lame ass brother being like "oh ho ho idk idk" shut up no one cares no one cares I swear to you no one cares shut uuuuup

ep 25-39

first of all, ep 25 was good but kinda reminded me of the nine episodes (13 until 21) where absolutely nothing interesting happened so I hope I'm wrong also can I just say just seeing the preview of the next episode made me roll my eyes so bad I almsot saw my brain?? bc yeah I'm fucking tired of nanami fosuced episodes she's so annoying oh my god nobody cares about a goddamn egg and much less one coming from her let her die or something pls she's so annoying there's nothing I've learned about her that was not against my own will I'm basically rotting over here 🤒

↳ ep 30 has me thinking Akio has a foot fetish or something 😐 bruh leave utena aloooooone I already know your plans and schemes you're not fooling anyone that's embarrassing for u and also... utena you're not very bright are you.... you start seeing every duelist you face with the same exact car and then when you see akio has the same car you didnt even stop to think about it that 1+1 equals 2 ... girl help yourself 😐

↳ yet again another nanami focused ep 😐😐😐😐😐 even though I do understand her better now I still don't find her particularly enjoyable to watch, call me a woman hater but like. idk she's still a bit annoying to me (but touga is straight up evil and is manipulating her so I feel bad for feeling like that tho.....)

↳ ok last 2 eps to go but listen. I thought the akio duel would have happened much sooner, maybe on ep 33 max but well didn't this age well lmao ngl, it did seem a bit too slow paced for my personal taste but also I feel like there's a certain level of drama that comes with slowing the pace down....

↳ aaaaaa yall I'm kinda 😢😭 over the ending omg........... even though it took the best of me to keep going in some parts I still enjoyed the ending aaaaa I thought i wouldnt really like it bc I just usually dont enjoy this type of ending but stil 😢😢😢😢 wait for me utena 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 girl I cried and then anthy walking in the end god utena and anthy holding hands 😭😭😭😭 akio can suck my dick

there's obviously many things I've missed or that I kinda didnt really pay attendance to so please dont take this serious, I was just writing as I watched the episodes so it's more like a thought compilation than anything, still I can see why there's many essays written about it and why it is held as a masterpiece by so many people

[sassy-pelican]

Soulmate AU: Sebastian Stan

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x plus-size-fem!Reader (based off self, explanation in the author’s note) Premise: On your twenty-first birthday, or the twenty-first birthday of your soulmate, you inhabit their body for twenty-four hours. The reader/you wake(s) up as Sebastian Stan. Warning: Fluff, humor, language, implied 18+/NSFW. I don’t know.

A/N: I am basing the reader off of myself. I know that means some physical characteristics are going to be different than actual readers, but I kind of wanted to use the oddity that is my body as a base because of the challenges it might cause for a person that has been a man for their entire life. In no way am I trying to alienate any readers. Also, for the intent of this AU, the reader is going to be bisexual; if that will bother anyone, please don’t read it. Sebastian will also have 20/20 vision, something I am unsure about. If anyone would like to rewrite this to be more inclusive, they may do so, only if they/you have a link to my original post. This has not been edited. Please enjoy. 

Your POV

Finally, less than a day left until you figure out who your soulmate is. Fuck, I hope it isn’t some creepy person. You think to yourself, hoping with everything in that the man or woman’s body you will be in for a whole twenty-four hours isn’t some pervert. You look down, and suddenly begin to feel a but sorry for the person who has to be you for a day.

You aren’t exactly skinny, and while you have made your peace with that, and have realized that without a little extra weight, you would be too top-heavy to have a functioning back, someone else might not. Your thighs touch, your arms are far too long, and all your height is in your legs, which equates to you looking like a newborn deer trying to walk most of the time.

What if they are younger than you and nothing happens? What is they are older and are mad that it didn’t happen sooner? Fuck. Your mind is racing, going through every possible scenario, trying to find an easy explanation. Slowly, you feel yourself begin to panic. Stop! No, we are not going to do this today [Y/N]! No panicking!

Somehow, you yelling at yourself mentally helps. It always seems to anyway. Shit, you should probably clean a little. If this soulmate of yours is going to be you, they are going to see your house, and your bedroom. You look at your bedroom. It is a mess. Clothes everywhere, blankets and pillows everywhere, nothing is clean. You even have your old princess blanket on your bed at the moment. Well that’s kind of embarrassing. Maybe you should change that.

Three hours later, almost everything that was covering your bedroom floor, is now covering your laundry room floor. Still a mess, but not in the first place he or she will see. You hesitate to change the blanket though. It is big and warm and soft; all things that help you sleep, and tonight you might need all the help you can get. Oh, fuck it. It’s staying.

The Next Morning

Peeling your eyes open, you are met with a room very different from your own. It looks like a hotel, and a nice one at that. You also realize that you don’t have boobs but do have a dick. Well, I guess I am a man. You laugh, a lower octave than you are used to, it actually shocks you before you realize, yet again that you are not you. Looking down at yourself, you notice a nice set of abs, which both pleases and alarms you. What if this guy is a fitness nut and expects me to be one too? No, no panicking. Not today. Maybe you should call yourself, see how the person who has your body is doing.

Silently picking up their phone, you realize that is has a passcode, one you don’t know. Well fuck. Sighing, you get up, ready to see who you are, not that you are likely to know who you are, but just maybe, maybe you have met this man before. As you reach the mirror, it hits you. Like a wall of bricks. “Fuck!”

Sebastian’s POV

This isn’t my hotel. What the hell, is that? Reaching up, I grab boobs. “What the fuck?” Confused, I sit up, and see a … a princess blanket? Okay this is getting weird. And Ariel is far too tan. At least the bed is comfy. Brows scrunched in confusion, I slide off of the bed, and walk around the house for a while, noticing very little. Not with my mind still racing at waking up with boobs. And not small ones at that.

Who is this girl? Where is this girl? I hear something. It almost sounds like feet, but not feet. Oh shit, does this girl have a kid? I walk around the corner, and see a dog coming to greet this woman. Thank the universe, I don’t know how well that would have went over. “Who are you?” I ask, not sure why, it isn’t like the dog can answer me.

I continue walking around and spot a note on the kitchen counter. At least there is something. I wasn’t prepared, the poor girl doesn’t have anything to guide her through me. My eyes widen. Fuck. This person is going to wake up as me! Pull yourself together Seb, this isn’t the end of the world. I look at the note.

‘Hello, my name is [Y/F/N] [Y/L/N] and if you are reading this you must be my soulmate. I’m sorry in advance. Please feed Mae a cup of dog food, it is in the big bucket in the pantry, with the cup in said bucket, after you eat dinner. No specific time, but she expects to be fed after you, well me. Anyway … I don’t have plans today, and told everyone to leave me alone, so you don’t have to worry about interacting with total strangers. I have a reminder on my phone to take meds at nine p.m., please don’t ignore it. There is a little plastic container with the bottles and stuff next to my bed with everything you need there. The passcode is [your passcode]. The neighbors can be really noisy, saying anything causes them to get louder so just deal with it the best that you can. Feel free to look through any of my books, I personally recommend Sarah J Maas, or the box set of Harry Potter. Don’t have too much fun. I have to live with whatever you do. ~ [Y/N]’

She sounds nice. Maybe I can make this work. Although, I am still in shock that boobs cause this much discomfort and are this heavy. I wonder what size bra she wears. No. Snooping would be rude, and I, Sebastian Stan am not a rude creeper. At least not yet.

Your POV

You are Sebastian Stan. A celebrity. Of all the possibilities you prepared for, this wasn’t one of them. It never occurred to you that he hadn’t met his soulmate yet. You always just thought that he had met her, and they couldn’t make it work or he kept her behind camera or something. Not that you are complaining, but this wasn’t something you had prepared for.

His phone dings. You read the preview. ‘My pass code is 6548.’ You smile, thankful that he saw your note and thought to reciprocate.

The knock on the door is echoing through your head. Sighing, you get up and do what Sebastian said. You let him in. Chris Evans. Great. You have to talk to one of your celebrity crushes, through your soulmates body, while not freaking out, about being in your soulmates body.

“We have a situation.” You say before Chris can even open his mouth.

“Okay?” He asks, hesitant.

“I am kind of not Sebastian. We have been texting and he told me to tell you what was going on.” You elaborate.

Chris smiles. “Fucking finally!” He practically yells, while doing a little happy dance.

“Um … thanks?”

“Sorry. I am just excited. Anthony is the only one out of the three of us, that has found his.” He stops. “Oh! Text him that I expect an equally enthusiastic response when I find mine.”

“I will. Later. But right now, you need to help me. Does he have anything planned publicly? He didn’t say.”

“Not that I am aware of, but you might want to ask him just to be sure. Oh, I forgot to ask, who are you?” Chris asks.

“I’m [Y/N], apparently I am Sebastian’s soulmate.” You answer.

“Is he in for a body shock? You don’t have to tell me anything specific.”

“Yes. Yes, he is. Already commented on it actually.” You reply, a smile on your face.

“Nothing bad I hope.” He eyes me, well Sebastian, warily.

“No, at least it wasn’t anything that I haven’t thought about everyday since I was twelve.” You elaborate.

“Please continue.”

“Boobs, Chris. I am talking about boobs.” You deadpan. He blushes a little.

“Right. Um, well, wish him luck for me?” You laugh at his embarrassment. The camaraderie between you two coming easier than you thought. Maybe it has to do with Sebastian already being friends with him?

“So, [Y/N], would you like to hear some embarrassing stories about your beloved Seb?”

Sebastian’s POV

It has been hours. She should have texted me again by now. What the fuck Seb? You don’t even know this girl and you are already clingy. I sigh, patting Mae’s head. The two of us have gotten off to a good start. Although I think it had a lot to do with the fact that I don’t think she realizes I am not [Y/N].

I have also discovered that she was right about her neighbors. They are loud. I followed her advice to not confront them, although, it took all of my restraint to do so. I also figured out that she is a lot stronger than she looks. I almost yanked the fucking door to the refrigerator off because I pulled so hard. All my, or her limbs that is, feel awkward too. Like they are little long for her body. But I am not going to question it.

Her princess blanket has become my new favorite object though. It is so soft. However, her food is delicious. She might not have a whole a lot when she returns though. Walking back into her bedroom I eye the nightstand. Don’t women keep strange things in there? Cautiously, I open it. Nothing. I look to the dresser. Nothing.

I go to shut her underwear drawer, something I didn’t intend to open, okay maybe I did, and hear a rattling. I tap the bottom. Shit. A false bottom. Tentatively, I remove it. My eyes go wide.

Your POV

It has been a while since Chris left. And you are bored out of your mind. There is nothing on the hotel television, and he has no books in his room. Almost as if of their own accord, your hands are rifling through his bedside table. You find an order form. Quite a lengthy one at that too. You look at the titles. Holy fuck, he ordered porn. You grab his phone. 

A/N 2: I was going to continue it to include what each of them did with the deal, but after trying to write it and reading what other smut I have written. I realized. I really suck at it. (no pun intended.) However, if anyone would like to try their hand at writing said scenes, feel free. I only ask that you tag me and link the original post. Any questions regarding the post and any specifics I will answer. The website I used for the text messages can be found in the message bar of each.

Also, all text messages are from Sebastian’s phone. I apologize to anyone who actually has that passcode. It just popped into my brain. I also feel the need to clarify his reaction to the possibility of the reader having a kid. I am in no way implying that Sebastian doesn’t like kids/want kids. But if I woke up in someone else’s body and they had a kid I didn’t know, I would be freaking out a little. (I love kids by the way). 

[toomanyfandomssos]

can you do an imagine that’s kinda long and it’s where Benny is dating the reader and she is super nervous to tell him that she’s a vampire? and can you make Benny kinda jealous bc Rory always flirts with her?

Here we go bois I'm back. I'm writing this to a really aesthetic storm in the distance and I'm making some teA. Let's get started shall we

Pairings: Benny Weir x Fem Reader

Gifs aren't mine, credits to the owners

Prompt: You and Benny are dating. What Benny doesn't know is you're a vampire. And things come out in an unexpected situation

2am: the howling wind outside kept you awake. Well. Not that you slept anyway but the wind definitely didn't help you study first the chem quiz. You're a vampire in highschool?! What kind of bullshit is that you're literally immortal. Whatever gotta graduate at some point might as well be with your friends and you're lovely boyfriend.

4am: *obnoxious birds chirping in the distance* you decide to grab a snack. Snack being the first annoying ass bird you caught. You were doodling in your sketchbook when you phone went off. A text from Benny. It read:

Bennykins: I know you're sleeping right now darling but I just wanted you to wake up to me telling you how much I-

The preview cut off. He didn't know you were a vampire. You had been fighting with yourself about how and when to tell him. You were absolutely terrified of how he'd react. Sarah had been pestering you to do it for weeks. You were scared he would be upset that you weren't a fledgling. Even though it wasn't your choice, Jesse basically held you at wooden steakpoint. You chose not to read the message to reveal that you were awake and continued drawing.

School:

"Hey good lookin" Benny yelled across the hall. He loved to point out that the two of you were dating any chance he got.

"Gross get a room" Erica added

You and Benny went out of your way to gross Erica out

"Anywayyyyy what are you doing after school babe" he asked, brushing your Y/H/C behind your ear.

Rory slid down the hallway at a perfectly convenient time

"Me" he wrapped his arm around you solely to make Benny angry

You were quick to shove him off "Very funny Rory, but maybe you should try someone who's, I dunno interested?"

Benny's face was red with anger to the blonde haired boy

You turned and kissed your manz without breaking eye contact with Rory, that was a power move in his book.

As Rory meekly walked away you got to answer Benns question finally

"As I was saying, you wanna go to the mall or maybe catch a movie?" You asked

"Anything's fine with me" he winked.

He walked you to class as you figured out some details so your parents wouldn't freak. Oddly enough they don't know either.

8pm:

The two of you decided to go bowling because what better date than that?

We're you winning or was he letting you? The world may never know.

The night was going perfect up until of course, Jesse walked in.

Out of all people in all places? You thought to yourself, what is this a movie?!

You attempted to avoid eye contact and hide behind Benny, Benny of course being Benny had to say something to piss of the fanged douchebag.

"Well well well if it isn't the Walmart Edward Cullen" he smirked

Jesse rolled his eyes and replied with a simple "fuck you"

Benny looked shocked seeing as he finally said something that got to that everloving dick wagon

"You shouldn't be talking Benny look who you're with" Jesse stated the second he realized you were there

"Yeah what about her?" He began getting defensive

Jesse used his power to drag you to him. That asshole really interrupted date night.

He held you there close as you squirmed. Trying to make it seem as human as possible, Benny was ready to fight and you didn't want him in that danger.

"Pretty ladies like you don't belong with geeks like that" he moved your hair behind your ear in the same way Benny did at school but sick and twisted.

You had enough of his shit and vamped out. You threw him down one of the alleys into the pins, amazingly you managed to get a strike. Your fangs were all out in the open and you were shocked to see Benny smiling like he just met his favorite actor.

Whilst you were distracted with his radiant smile, Jesse launched himself in your direction and knocked you to the ground. You being you, quickly got up and threw some more punches.

Benny literally took some popcorn from a child and watched his amazing girl in awe. Did he expect this? No. Is he disappointed? Nope. Is he going to laugh about it forever? Most definitely.

After Jesse fled in fear you walked up to Benny.

"Hey so, crazy thing. I'm a vampire haha" you told him in shame

"Really?!?!? I would've never guessed!" He sarcastically shoved you a bit

"Yo- you're not mad?!" Your eyes widened

"Of course not love" he reassured you instantly. His warmth gave you tingles and butterflies just like the day you met him.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner" you embraced his love

"It's not an easy thing to tell Y/N" it's almost like everything he said was planned. And that alone left you wondering.

Even though you we're the strong vampire, you always gave Benns the opportunity to protect you. Especially when Rory was, well. Rory.

"Heya toots you wanna catch a movie?" Rory, again wrapped an arm around you and winked at Benny

Boy oh boy he chose the wrong day. Let's just say that conversation only carried through Rory and Benny's fist.

You and Benny walked through the halls of that school having no idea where life was gonna take you two but you sure as hell were having fun.

IM SO SORRY IVE BEEN GONE FOR AN ACTUAL DECADE BUT I AM BACK AND IM TAKING REQUESTS SEND EM IN FRENS. hope you enjoyed this ^~^

[aleteia-ff]

Sneak Preview | Chapter 16 [The Phantom of the Arena]

Next chapter will be up on Thursday! And below the keep reading line, you can find a small preview! 

This chapter covers the first few days of Astrid and Hiccup’s new ‘arrangement’ and this part features the two of them talking to each other, but things aren’t exactly peachy.

~Chapter is still heavily WIP so slight changes may be made~

“Stop avoiding me. Answer my questions. And most of all, stop acting like you’re part of the Jorgenson family,” she told him.

Hiccup shot her a confused look.

“Stop being a humongous dick!” she hissed.

“You wanted to see what my life was like, Astrid,” Hiccup countered. “Well, this is it.” He gestured around him. “Hours of solitude and loneliness, not a human around, day after day.”

She walked up to him, not afraid to challenge him. “If you feel so lonely, why do you avoid me?”

“I didn’t say I mind the loneliness,” Hiccup countered. “Toothless and the other dragons are all the company I need.”

“Then why did you talk to me in the arena?”

“Because I got bored.”

She was now looking at him, face to face. She didn’t buy it. “Why are you lying to me?”

“I am not.” The look on Hiccup’s face was as steeled as the one on her own. It made the lines of his scars stand out even more.

“I don’t believe you.”

“Then don’t,” Hiccup bit.

She could feel herself get incredibly frustrated. Why did he have to be so stubborn? “Why are you doing this? You don’t want me here, I know that. But the sooner you cooperate, the sooner we kill the queen, the sooner I’ll be gone. But of course you only talk to me when you have a blade at your throat.” She balled her fists. “A Gronckle’s ass would be better company than you.”

Hiccup didn’t answer, but simply turned around and made his way back to Toothless.

“Don’t run away from me, Hiccup,” she hissed. “If you’re going to keep avoiding me, we’ll never kill the queen. And I will be here to torment you for a long time. Is that what you want?”

Again, Hiccup did not reply, but simply fumbled around with Toothless’ saddle.

“Tell me, Hiccup!” she fumed. “Why do you feel the need to act like this? Why can’t you just face me like a normal person so we can get this over with!?”

“Because I am ashamed of myself, Astrid!” Hiccup yelled, suddenly turning around and looking at her.

[batfamfanfics]

Preview!!

Kori clapped her hands together once. “Then let us focus, and the sooner you will be in the water.” She told them. “Horoscope, Raven. You too will go first. “

Hal nodded, rolling her shoulders to loosen them up. Her costume’s cloak was sitting with Ravens, beneath a tree on the edge of the dirt circle that served as their training ring. Raven and Hal stepped into the center together, prepared.

“We need a volunteer. Jaime?” Raven asked him, her tone low and mischievous. “Since your suit will protect you, we thought…” Raven held out her hand to him, waiting.

Jaime narrowed his eyes, and Hal gave him an encouraging smile.

Jaime tilted his head back, groaning. “You need me to be Hal’s human punching bag. Again.” He figured.

Hal could only demonstrate and practice the moves she learned with her powers on people, since most of them only worked when she could grab hold of a soul.

“Fine, whatever.” He pulled his head back up, grinning now at Hal. “Give me all you got, jefe.” He goaded, walking into the dirt circle and stopping a few yards in front of them.

Hal bounced on the balls of her feet, excited.

“Okay, okay, okay. Ready?” She asked, looking to Raven and then to Jaime. They both nodded.

Hal stepped back a few paces.

Then she ran forward.

Raven opened up a portal with her powers. Hal ran into it, and her world turned 180 degrees.

Hal fell from ten feet above the ground, where the exit portal hung in the air. She grasped Jaime’s spirit with her powers, and used the fall to slam him to the ground at the same time her feet hit the dirt.

Jaime yelped. He was pulled hard toward the ground. The Blue Beetle suit extended projections to catch him on his back. Hal straightened and trotted over to him, holding out a hand.

“Well done!” Kori encouraged them. Jaime took Hal’s hand and let her pull him up.

They’d all been assigned partners to create and practice a new, collaborative move. Hal and Raven had been working on synchronizing that for the last week. It was harder than they made it look.

“Got me good.” Jaime admitted, twisting his back to crack it.

Garfield snorted. “If you or a loved one has been subjected to Horoscope’s training, you may be entitled to financial compensation.” Garfield spoke in a rounded, mock tone, imitating commercials. “Call 1-800-YOU-SUCK now to get a free consultation today.”

Jaime went to cuff him in the head, laughing with Hal and the others. Garfield just dodged the hit by turning into a snake and slithering away. Terra smirked a little, but she was hard to get a laugh out of. Damian was damn near impossible, but Hal liked to think she was getting better at it. The others too.

“What did Kori say? Focus.” Dick told them, although amusement was thick in his tone. “You kids are impossible to wrangle today.” He shook his head.

“Beach, beach, beach, beach.” Garfield chanted in a whisper, shifting back into a human and pumping his fists with the words.

[audreycritter]

Summer Reading Program

A short fluff for @cerusee . Thanks to @preciousthingsareprecious for brainstorming!  ~2700 Words Robin!Jason, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth Gen/Family Bonding Tooth-rotting fluff Summer Reading Program

The Manor library was quiet except for the ticking of a clock and Bruce Wayne was plowing through a stack of papers that needed signatures. He'd been working on it all day and had moved from the study an hour ago just for a change of scenery. If he finished enough of the thick ream of contracts and disclosures and other legal documents he'd previewed ahead of time, he wouldn't have to do as much when things got crazy at night.

It had been a slow week for patrol and Bruce wasn't sure how much longer it would last.

With a bang, the door flung open and Jason Todd shuffled into the room. His eyes were just visible above the tower of books and fliers balanced in his arms and he made a beeline for the desk Bruce was sitting behind. He eased the pile onto the edge of the desk and then set a flier right in front of Bruce, on top of a paper waiting for a signature.

It said SUMMER READING PROGRAM in large purple letters and had the Gotham County Public Library System seal printed in one corner. The illustration was a cartoonish crowd of fictional characters with various identifying costumes or trinkets.

“I need your help,” Jason said bluntly.

Bruce flipped the trifold open. Inside, on the line for a patron name and phone number, Jason had already filled in Bruce’s name in his childish but improving cursive scrawl.

“What is this?” Bruce asked.

Jason gave him a look that told him just how stupid he thought that question was.

“It's for your book list,” Jason said, tapping the numbered lines. “You gotta read ten. I already picked out mine.”

“Why do I have a summer reading list.” Bruce read over the poorly chosen italic font. It wasn't the easiest to read.

“Because I'm asking you to help me,” Jason said. “If you turn it in, they put your name in a drawing. The grand prize is a Kindle and $25 in Amazon credit.”

“This has my name,” Bruce said, switching his gaze to the stack of books. It was a mix of middle school fantasy, Hardy Boys, and something that looked like a survival series about mountain climbing. “These are books for you.”

Jason gave an exasperated sigh and put both hands over his face and then dragged his fingers downward, pulling at the tender skin beneath his eyes. Bruce reached out and moved one hand away, worried for his exposed sclera, and Jason yanked away with an irritated huff.

“You have to pick your own books,” Jason said. “This is for my list. I need you to hurry. I just found out today and it ends in eleven days. Three chances are better than one.”

“Alfred is helping,” Bruce surmised.

“Yes,” Jason said. “All hands on deck.”

“For a kindle.”

“Do you need coffee? Are you asleep?” Jason waved his hand in front of Bruce’s face and this time Bruce leaned his head away. “I just said that. Pay attention, B. It's urgent.”

“Why do you need to win a kindle.” Bruce felt like he was missing some crucial piece of information and he scanned the flier again. Was there some kind of school credit involved? It didn't look like it.

Jason took a deep breath and launched into a rapid-fire bullet list that sounded rehearsed and bordered on pleading.

“I know I'm supposed to have limited screen time but is it really a screen if it's e-ink? It's not the one with games or movies and it has parental controls and it would help with school and I could borrow books from the library website and save money and it'll be easier to pack for trips and when I come spend the day at the office and heavy backpacks are a source of bad shoulder strain and it's not good for me and I can get books in Spanish to practice my—”

Bruce had said Jason’s name three times with no break and he finally gave up and pinched Jason’s lips together. Jason kept trying to talk, mumbling through his pressed lips.

“Jason.”

The boy stopped.

“I didn't ask why you needed one. Why do you need to win one? If you want one that badly, we can talk about buying one for you.”

Jason looked affronted and immediately after Bruce let go of his face, Jason’s fingers were pinching Bruce’s lips shut in return.

“Are you conspiring to interfere with an educational pursuit?” Jason asked just as seriously. Bruce looked into his frowning blue eyes and considered for a moment the enthusiasm with which Jason had entered the room, the way he'd dragged his feet about school the previous fall and then drastically changed his tune after just a few weeks.

He considered the stack of books and gently took Jason’s wrist and moved his hand away from Bruce’s lips. He thought Jason pinched much harder than he had, but he wasn't sure it was intentional.

“You think you can make it through all those?” Bruce asked, thinking about a balance between realistic goals and pushing one’s boundaries. He admired challenge but didn't want Jason to be overwhelmed; he was a steady reader and becoming a better one all the time, but was still slow for all his heart. They'd spent a lot of time the past year playing academic catch-up in almost every subject.

Jason scowled at him with a bright flash of anger and Bruce internally scolded himself for being an idiot.

“Why? You don't think I can?”

It sounded like defensive daring, but Bruce had spent enough time with Jason to know he wasn't Dick. Whatever bubbled to the surface was often a mask for some fear or anxiety and he'd become aware (sometimes with Alfred’s pointed help) that Jason deeply needed their simple belief in him.

“Of course you can,” Bruce said quickly, hoping it wasn't too quickly. “And I'll help. I think I can spare you from patrol for a night or two if you need it.”

“You'll do it, too?” Jason asked, brightening instantly. He was thumbing through the stack of books and looking over covers.

Bruce looked at the papers spread across the desk. He thought of the ones he'd left in his study. He glanced over at the shelves lining the walls of the room he often sat in but rarely used recently.

“Eleven days?” he asked.

“Mhmm,” Jason nodded, already with his nose in a book. It looked like something about animals with swords. “Ten books.”

“If I win, I'll let you borrow the kindle sometime,” Bruce teased, standing and pushing the papers to the side. Jason kicked at his shins when Bruce walked by, and missed, but didn't look up from the book.

Bruce plucked a book off the shelf and snagged Jason’s t-shirt collar with a finger and tugged. The kid was leaning, half-sitting, on the edge of the desk. “C’mon, Jay. Couch. Keep me company.”

The boy trailed after him without lifting his eyes and his lips moved when he was sounding out longer words. He sank into a corner of the couch with his feet stretched out and pressed against Bruce’s leg.

Neither of them moved except to turn pages until Alfred rapped his knuckles on the door frame to call them to dinner. Jason looked up and blinked owlishly, then his eyes widened even more and he was on his knees peering over Bruce’s shoulder in a second.

“What are you doing?” he demanded breathlessly. He flopped back on the couch and threw his arm over his face. “Bruce! That's like a million pages. How are you gonna finish ten books if you start with that one?”

Bruce held a finger to mark his place in The Count of Monte Cristo and held out a hand to cushion Jason’s head when he rolled off the couch toward the floor.

“I’ll finish, Jay,” he promised. Jason shoved his hand away.

“Can we read while we eat?” Jason asked. His face was buried in the plush rug but he fumbled around for his book, abandoned on the couch. “I’m at a good part.”

“I don't—” Bruce started.

“—see any issue with a temporary allowance?” Alfred prompted from the doorway. He was holding a slender volume of essays. “I wholeheartedly agree.”

Bruce thought it was pointless to argue this on the grounds that he had long been strongly discouraged from bringing work of any kind to the table in the dining room.

They ate while reading, all three of them. The only conversation was when Jason asked for a definition of a word and Bruce was halfway through an etymology of Latin roots when he saw Alfred’s raised eyebrow and Jason’s impatient lip-chewing.

“...but we can talk about that part later,” Bruce finished a bit lamely.

“I want to,” Jason said, and he sounded like he meant it. “Twelve days from now.”

The next nine days brought four patrols without Jason and a boy who was reading so constantly that one night, he missed both reading and patrol when Alfred forced him to bed early with a headache from eye strain. Jason sulked more than he slept and Alfred tried to make it up to him by reading a chapter from his current book aloud, and Bruce read another before going out for the night.

He was less than impressed with the child-protagonist’s climbing skills and problem solving abilities but kept his opinion to himself.

Despite Jason’s worry, Bruce himself made blazing progress through a whole slew of novels he'd wanted to revisit or read. He hadn't had such a good excuse to set aside work and other tasks and read for a long time and wished he'd done it sooner.

Alfred didn't seem to mind the excuse either, and Bruce frequently found him cooking or cleaning with a book in hand and unapologetic about the distraction.

Eight days in, Bruce took the whole day off of work and spent it shut up in the Manor library again with Jason and a steady stream of snacks from the kitchen. In the afternoon, Alfred joined them for a while.

Alfred was the first to finish his list, two days in advance. He clipped it to the fridge with a magnet and read another book anyway.

Bruce was two away and slightly regretting his choice of Le Morte d’Arthur when Jason kept checking his page number progress and humming worriedly at the calendar.

When he got back from patrol early, early that morning, Jason was sitting in the cave with his own final book in his hands and Bruce’s next to him.

“Read,” Jason ordered, pointing. “You have over a hundred pages left and tomorrow is the last day.”

“Jay,” Bruce said, worn out to the middle of his bones. It had not been an easy night.

“B,” Jason said, verging on pleading. “We’re almost there.”

With a sigh, Bruce pushed back the cowl and dropped into the computer chair and propped his booted feet on the desk. If he got any more comfortable he wasn't going to make it.

He wished Jason could just ask for things. Dick hadn't come from much money, and had been a frugal kid, but had few qualms asking for needs or mentioning wants. He didn't take money for granted, exactly, but also seemed more like a normal kid in his acceptance of provided material goods.

Jason swung wildly between actively resisting money being spent on him and gleefully allowing himself to be spoiled, only to collapse into guilt or self-punishing behaviors later in an attempt to retroactively earn whatever they'd given him. He'd balked at tickets to a Knights game, gone happily on the day of the event and come home with a jersey and stuffed full of junk food, and then disappeared for a day a week later.

They'd found him with a bucket of soapy water, worn out after washing every car in the garage.

But when Bruce tiredly looked up from the text to Jason, sitting on the computer desk with his face reacting to every development in his book, occasionally sounding out words under his breath, his eyes rimmed red and a happy, secure slackness in his posture, none of the comparisons or worry mattered. Bruce reached out and ruffled his hair. Jason didn't pull away but instead flipped back a page and said, “B, just listen to this part.”

Bruce didn't mind anymore.

Fifteen hours (and some sleep) later, Jason watched him like a hawk while he filled out the final line of the flier. After dinner, Bruce double-checked the spelling and legibility of Jason’s own list minutes after Jason triumphantly slapped the last book down on the dining room table.

They went to the public library together, all three of them, per the library’s policy of turning in one’s own reading list. Bruce had to fill out a form to replace an expired library card under Jason’s accusing glare.

The glare faded when Jason watched the librarian drop all three names into a decorated glass jar.

Jason talked non-stop, almost without breathing, the walk to the car and ride home. Bruce and Alfred listened to every recalled detail of the ten books Jason had read, and his opinions (with occasional profanity) on those details. It seemed like he'd been saving it all up in his rush to move on to the next book and it was all spilling out of him now.

He didn't stop through the trip up the stairs into the house or until nearly dinner, when he sighed happily and announced gravely that they had to start earlier the next summer.

The weekend passed without incident at the Manor or on patrol or otherwise. Jason roamed the house with nervous energy when he was awake and kept borrowing Bruce’s laptop to double-check the library prize drawing date.

Monday rolled around with a morning forecast of summer storms and Bruce got ready for work and offered to take Jason with him for the day. Jason usually liked going to hide in Bruce's office for the day but today, he refused from his spot by the kitchen phone.

“Should I keep him busy with something else?” Bruce asked Alfred in the foyer, slipping his arms into his raincoat while casting an eye back toward where they'd left Jason.

“I doubt it would be very effective,” Alfred said with an equally worried frown.

Around three in the afternoon, right around the time Bruce had been planning to head home early, his cell phone rang.

“I won!” Jason yelled in his ear as soon as he answered. “B! I never win anything but they drew my name! I won!”

“That's great, Jay!” Bruce said, thanking whatever gods were listening. It wasn't even the idea of not having to console a disappointed kid. He would have read twenty, thirty books in the same time frame to hear Jason so excited again.

“I gotta go, Al’s driving me over right now. The library closes at five. Bye!”

The line went dead and Bruce decided to call it a day. He drove himself home in the rain, under ominous flashes of lightning and cracks of thunder. He made it home before Alfred and Jason by not much more than twenty minutes and the rain had let up by the time they pulled into the drive.

He helped Jason set up the device in the kitchen while Alfred cooked and the wide grin didn't leave Jason’s face for hours.

They were on a stakeout later that week, hunched down in the Batmobile, when a faint glow lit the interior of the car and Batman looked sidelong. Robin was curled up in the seat reading.

“We’ve gotta couple hours,” Robin said. “You told me yourself. Is it too bright?”

Batman studied the alley and streetscape outside the windshield of the hidden car and almost said yes. Then he changed his mind, shifted his cape, and threw it over Robin’s head.

“No,” Batman said.

“Okay,” Robin said happily from under the cape. The glow didn’t make it through the dark fabric and the interior was pitch black again. “Thanks, B.”