idontcare4urmom

[idontcare4urmom]

“first?” • 1.014 words

⋆.ೃ࿔*:explicit content,subvirgin!chris,pussydrunk!chris,unprotected sex,praising kink,clit playing,oral (m! & f! receiving),dirty talk,etc.

!! first language is not english!!

you and chris had produced a special unbreakable bonding together since forever,you thought him as your best friend and you suppose that he thought you as his.you would often spend hours yapping around with him about different opinions and assumptions in the most random cases,or binge eat to dissimilar snacks until you were both intolerable full.

yet,you often would find in the back of your mind dreadful fantasizes about him,you couldn't stop it and it was starting to become irritating.he was too attractive,he had a fascinating personality that drawn you to him,though you never dared to admit it to him and neither to your own self,

you were both currently chilling on your bed,doing a movie marathon that was obviously his idea,you tried to avoid it but at the end he would always find a way to convince you on doing as he desired.after the awful options along with shows or films he choose were over,the conversation you were having was slightly different than normally,it was a pretty much sexaul one.

you knew that your friend wasn’t really the best on pulling girls,but you were more than jaw dropping shocked when you discovered that he was a virgin.you don’t know why you were so surprised but it was really hard to believe,

“wait,so you never had any type of sex? like ever?”

“not really,except oral once,i didn’t really enjoyed it to be honest”

you paused in your tracks when those words left from his mouth,and you couldn’t deny that your disbelief was absolutely high when you heard his statement.not only he had received head before and didn’t pleasured him,but he also didn’t want to take a step further than that?

“how is that even possible? i mean,is really rare for a man to not savour a blow job”

chris was incredibly amused by your current state,he found it quite adorable that you couldn’t believe what you were hearing,but the only thing he did was to shrug it off with his shoulders.

you almost yearned to prove him wrong,to convince yourself that maybe you were the one who would be able to actually unveil to him a newfound experience.you held back from pouncing on him when the logic shallowed up your intrusive thoughts.

it wouldn’t be possible to see chris the same if you actually decided to archive something so unfamiliar to both of you,right?

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

not sure how things escalated so quickly,but in a matter of a few minutes your tongue was making contact with his,messily devouring his narcotic taste that already had you hooked.your hips were tantalizing against his,obviously craving for me since you could feel the sensation of his clothed erection pressing against your thigh,

you eventually broke the contact,breathlessly staring at him with a piercing gaze and with your pupils dilated from the satisfaction that was crashing currently through your veins,his own messy flushed expression sending waves of heat down to your core.

“don’t worry pretty boy,just relax and i will take good care of you,hmh?”

you didn’t hesitate to transfer to the ground,sinked down on both of your knees at the same time you reached from the waistband of his pants,discarding them off alongside with his slim underwear.you barely glanced towards his face,searching for any type of confirmation,and chris could only nod his head briefly.

his tip was the exact hue of his reddening expression,rosy and accompanied by leaks of gooey pre-cum,his blue orbs grand open with anticipation as you slowly capture it in between your mouth,triggering out a whimper from him.

“oh fuck..that’s it,please,please suck me off” the building pool in your panties was almost unbearable when you started bobbing your head in a semi bouncy motion and dawdling speed,connecting your throat around his throbbing head enthusiastically.

warm water rolls down from the corner of his eyes,pathetically coating his entire face while the unrelenting strength of your chocked gagging on his member jolted sparkling shudders over his spine.he hesitantly rocked his pelvis forward,until he finally founded the perfect amount of rhythm to match yours.

“shit..y-you are so perfect,just like that baby..’m so close” the lukewarm vibrations of your hum against his dick when he twisted his thumb greedily on your sensitive nipple under your top almost hooded him on his orgasm,but you smoothed his cock out of your plump lips,a whine slipping off his neck as a result.

you lazily tousled away any piece that covered your body,focusing on his mercifully fucked out face while positioning yourself down on his lap,your hips ruthlessly rubbing back and forth above his shaft.you weren’t able to contain the teasing phrases that escaped you when you heard him sniffling over and over again,his hooded glance frustrating your shallow pussy more into an impatience snap.

“my sweet boy,looking all innocent yet so far gone to pleasure..do you want me to ride you baby?”

“fuck yes,want to feel you so bad—don’t me beg more” he puffed,his eyes wide and imploring while his length curled upwards to graze leisurely against your vulnerable clit,a sly giggle pasting your mouth that transmuted into a indecent moan when you sunk down on him.

your inners walls enveloped squeezingly his cock as you rebounded your ass up and down on him,companied with at first hesitant yet deep bucking thrusts of his own,his thumbs securely digging the flesh of your waist deliciously while he stretched you out,his base sprinkled unwarningly with spurt jets of his release since he was already overwhelmed from earlier,his dick swivelling inside you and abruptly breaking yourself into a sob,

“please sweetheart—mhm,need you to cum around my dick,please” those were the last words you heard before crashing in an absolute ecstasy,white rings of seed busting and wavering around his leaking cock deliciously,

you struggled to collapse into your senses after the mind blowing yet short sex,your body finally submitting into a laying position on top of him,stimulating a low laugh from the man underneath you.

you were caught off guard when the next thing you felt was his palms spreading your legs open,his face leaping in between them to lap at your juices with his kitten relentlessly,triggering surprised mewls to drop from your parted lips

your high pitched sounds only urged him further,his tongue slipping slowly past your folds to caress every spot slobbily,his stubble unconsciously grazing against your sensitive skin as he didn’t stopped his action for even a second.

“chris,oh my gosh,s’ good” the pressure of your second up coming orgasm was already about to bust,and when the twirling motions of his mouth hugged your spot,you were cumming hard on his face,your calloused fingers gripping his hair locks as if your life depended on it.

chris continued until he made sure that he hadn’t left a single drop around your flesh,placing a last peck on your inner thigh before heightening up his head,his disheveled curls falling all over his forehead,

there was a long thick silence that crossed the room,the realization finally hitting your senses like a firm slap,not until a male voice was heard besides you.

“so,would you get too mad if i told you that i want more?”

ev’s note: literally haven’t written in so long..lmao 😬..anyways hope you enjoyed babies💗💗 #ihavenomotivationpleasehelp

taglist: @wiidfi0wer33 @chrislova @cutiepaiquill @zainabthescientist @jetaimevous @toysizee @chratts-left-ball @savvyratatouille @bellassturniolo @justexisting12

�� idontcare4urmom

[idontcare4urmom]

ughhh,not to be dramatic but i love him sm,he is literally the sweetest soul🥹💗

Me next?

[idontcare4urmom]

so um,this was my EXACT reaction upon seeing this picture 😊🙏🏻 SLUT,SLUT,SLUT

[idontcare4urmom]

sigh cause the whole topic is most likely going to be talked in the next video,i am going to have second hand embarrassment😬

the fandom embarrassing itself once again ❤️

[idontcare4urmom]

one day,i am gonna get that man PREGNANT,mark my words.🫦

DONT PLAY W ME .

[idontcare4urmom]

EMBARRASSING for her wtf 😭 i never liked her either cause she is really weird,idc if i am gonna get attacked but that woman is proved that doesn’t even has a degree for actual management 💀 besides that,she used to let the triplets leave at her house for a couple of months too which is not normal and simply unprofessional,also her daughter (madi) was literally a MINOR then,and it’s really weird to have three grown men live in when she is also in the house.i am not saying that the triplets were going to do anything to her of course but imo it’s just uncanny

Oh…. That’s not-

[idontcare4urmom]

all of the sudden my tits are completely exposed and my shirt along with my bra is across my room!!??😨😨😨🤰🏻

I DID NOT HEAR THIS IN THE VIDEO HELLOOOOO

currently pulling my tits out

[idontcare4urmom]

I NEED THIS

YOU KNOW YOU LIKE IT chris sturniolo x fem!reader

requested @idontcare4urmom i am SO incredibly sorry i've been sitting on this request for a while because i can't write smut for the life of me. but i hope you enjoy!

– in which teasing chris ends up with the night ending just how you wanted it to

disclaimer swearing, pet names (ma, kid), harmless teasing, SMUT – fingering, p in v (unprotected), neck grabbing, hair pulling, spanking?? (slapping ass), degradation (use of whore, slut etc.), praising i guess?? – let me know if i missed anything!

wordcount 2.3k

zayas note notice how my writing severely deteriorates and makes less and less sense as the smut goes on..

not proofread

the steady thrum of music echoed through the familiar friends house, blending with bursts of laughter and the low murmur of conversation. it was the kind of scene chris usually thrived in—music pounding, drinks pouring, and people buzzing around him. a while ago, he’d have been front and center, drifting from one drinking game to the next, but now, instead of diving into the chaos, he was sitting on the couch beside you, long legs stretched out, head tipped back against the cushions as if trying to will away his restlessness. his hand rested lazily on your thigh, the pads of his fingers tracing absent circles into your skin, a habit he didn’t seem to pay mind to, but never failed to make your heart flutter.

nick lay sprawled on the couch opposite you both (with matt at home, most likely sleeping), clearly intrigued by the fact chris wasn’t his usual wild self tonight. "look at this," he said, grinning as he gestured between the two of you. "we're at a party- and your just—sitting here? no beer pong or pumping drinks?" he snorts. he wasn't quite straightforward with where he was going, but you all knew he was hinting chris being too attached to you to go just about anywhere else. chris rolled his eyes at the indirect jab, his grip on your thigh tightening ever so slightly.

you felt the corners of your lips twitch, biting back the smile threatening to spill over. nick’s ribbing was nothing new, but the fact that chris was so easy to rile up lately made it impossible not to join in. leaning closer into his side, you rested your head against his shoulder, your fingers sneaking up to run lightly along the seam of his jeans. “he’s just been so behaved, hasn’t he?” you mused, your voice dripping with mock sweetness as you voiced your words in more ways then one. "just loves me too much to leave me here alone"

chris’s fingers tensed slightly on your thigh, his grip becoming firmer—enough to make your breath hitch without causing any real discomfort. it was the only warning you were going to get, subtle and silent, and yet the sensation of his hand grounding you only made you grin wider.

nick said nothing, but let out a laugh, clearly amused by the dynamic unfolding in front of him. he took a long sip from his beer, enjoying himself far more than he should’ve, but he was smart enough to stay on the sidelines, content with watching you poke fun at his brother.

you tilted your head up to look at chris, feigning a pout that didn’t quite mask the glimmer of mischief in your eyes. "you’re not mad about it, are you, baby? you sure you don't wanna go mingle and just stay on the couch with me the entire night?" you asked, giving his thigh a playful squeeze, the pressure just light enough to keep things teasing but enough to remind him you weren’t going to stop anytime soon.

his jaw ticked, the muscle there tightening as he stared straight ahead, clearly trying to rein in whatever reaction was bubbling beneath the surface. "you think you're funny, huh?" he muttered, low enough that only you could hear, the words edged with warning.

you shrugged, batting your lashes up at him innocently. “hm? i'm just telling nick how much you love me, 's clearly enough to make you wanna avoid everybody else here to sit down with me on the couch and be a loverboy” your voice was soft, teasing, carrying just enough challenge to let him know exactly what you were doing—and that you weren’t planning on letting up.

the corners of chris’s mouth twitched, his lips pressing into a thin line as his hand slid higher on your thigh, fingers digging in with just enough force to make your skin buzz under his touch. it was a silent message, daring you to keep going

nick chuckled again from his seat on the coffee table, clearly entertained but sensing that he’d pushed just far enough. nick drained the rest of his drink before standing up. "i'm gonna go mingle and give you guys some space" he states, shooting you a playful wink, then disappeared into the crowd without another word.

the second nick was out of sight, chris exhaled sharply through his nose, his hand flexing once more against your thigh, this time tighter. you could feel the frustration rolling off him in waves, simmering just beneath the surface, though he hadn’t fully snapped yet. it was that same slow-building tension you’d grown familiar with, the kind that made your heart race and your skin prickle with anticipation.

"you’ve been real bold tonight ma." chris murmured, his voice low and measured, the calm tone somehow more dangerous than if he’d outright snapped. "you think that’s cute?"

your grin only widened, heart thudding hard against your ribcage as you leaned in closer, the scent of his cologne wrapping around you like a second skin. “you know you like it,” you whispered, lips brushing the edge of his jaw, just close enough to feel the slight hitch in his breath. "love it when i tease you"

for a moment, he didn’t move, his gaze locked on yours, sharp and unreadable. the weight of his hand on your thigh burned hot against your skin, a promise lingering in the air between you. and then—so slowly it felt deliberate—his fingers curled, squeezing the flesh of your thigh just hard enough to make your breath catch.

“we’ll see about that,” he muttered under his breath, more to himself than to you, though the flicker in his darkened gaze told you exactly what was coming.

the anticipation thrummed low in your belly, leaving your skin humming and your heart pounding as you shifted slightly under his grip, the thrill of knowing exactly how this was going to end sparking like electricity along your spine.

you met his gaze, your grin softening into something smug and satisfied, and without missing a beat, you leaned in close, your breath hot against his skin.

chris didn’t respond to the sensation, at least not with words. but the way his fingers pressed into your thigh, the way his jaw clenched and his breath came shallow, was answer enough.

he rarely ever put up with your shit, so for him to keep his composure around his brother for even this long was enough. he let your teasing words and lingering touches continue on for the night, he could deal with you later and shut you up the only way he found fit.

you let out a pathetic moan as chris slowly and teasingly pushed two of his lengthy fingers inside your sopping cunt, your thong pushed to the side in urgency as he stretched you out in the most delicious way, his digits pushing far enough to reach your cervix.

his eyes were hooded and his expression smug as he watched you squirm underneath him, smirking at the way you'd arch your back at the simplest curl of his fingers. "thats it ma—milk my fingers like the slut you are" he cooed as he thrusted his fingers further into your heat, slowly, teasingly, coating them with your arousal as you let out slow breaths.

he turned your head to the side, bringing his mouth to yours, enveloping you in a deep kiss as he stretched you out with his fingers in a scissoring motion, his lips mounding into yours sensually, muffling your whines of pleasure as your tongues fought for dominance, you letting out a loud gasp once your clit earned a harsh slap from the hand that wasn't knuckles deep into your heat, chris clearly getting pissed by the idea that you thought he'd let you take the lead in a situation like this.

you were starting to grow restless over the stimulation of chris's mouth and fingers at once, your breath beginning to grow ragged and your elbows sinking into the mattress as your mouth hung agape in pleasure, the familiar feeling of your stomach tightening in response to your upcoming orgasm.

your boyfriend could sense your release was near by the was your walls throbbed around his fingers and how you panted like a lost puppy, he sped up, smirking to himself as your peace was seconds away from washing over you, before taking his fingers out entirely, pleased by the groan of frustration you'd let out. "chrisss" you dragged out, those being the only words you had uttered since he had you bent over the end of his bed, whining over his denial at your orgasm.

"if you think i'm gonna let you cum this easy after earlier, your fuckin' insane kid" he murmured, bringing his fingers to his lips, licking them clean of your juices before bringing his arms to your sides and abruptly flipping you over, leaving no room for a thought as you let out a yelp in surprise.

the hum of the air conditioning and the faint buckle of chris's belt being undone and carelessly thrown to the side were the only noises you could register so far, soon followed by the annoyed grunt by chris as he hurriedly kicked his worn out jeans down, his boxer briefs soon following.

chris's rough hands were pressed onto your back, his fingers digging into your flesh as he rutted into you with increased speed. the lace undergarment you had hastily picked out earlier in hopes of the night ending like this was pushed to the side, leaving you exposed to his relentless thrusts. each deep stroke making you drunk on his cock, your mind foggy and breathing heavy as he spoke words you couldn't quite interpret while your walls fluttered around him, legs dangling off the footboard of his bed.

"fuckin' praying 'f this weren't you?" chris growled, his breath hot against your ear. "embarrasing me infront of my brother so you could get a good fuck." his fingers tightened their grip on your hips, pulling you back onto his cock with a force that left no room for doubt about his intentions, your eyes rolling back in response to the sudden intense pleasure. "couldn't just fuckin' ask for it, could you?" he added, his voice dripping with a mix of anger and satisfaction.

your body trembled under his rough handling, the lace of your thong a thin barrier to the raw, primal need he was stoking within you. his strokes were relentless, deep and languid, each one pushing you closer to the edge. you could feel the heat pooling between your legs, your own breath coming in ragged gasps as you tried to keep up with his punishing pace.

"answer me," he demanded, his voice a harsh command that left no room for hesitation. "just had to grab my attention somehow like the fuckn' whore you are didn't you?" he taunted, reaching an arm out to wrap one of his hands around your neck, his fingers wrapping around your throat with just enough pressure to keep you on your toes. "you know you like it" he taunted, mocking your earlier words from the party that had been used in the context of simple and harmless teasing.

you could barely form words, the pleasure and pain blending into a heady mix that left you dizzy as you nodded at whatever he was saying, too cock-drunk out of your mind to speak.

his grip tightened as he lifted one hand to give you a slap on the ass, his fingers leaving marks on your skin as he thrust harder, his cock hitting depths that made you cry out. "words" he tutted, his tone dripping with satisfaction. "y-yes!" you managed to squeal through heavy pants. "needed–need you so bad chris" you breathed, as the repeated invasion to your inner walls sped up. "atta girl" chris praised with a smirk at you managing to form a sentence in your dick-dazed state, the hand he had rested on your ass moving to your hair, forming a makeshift ponytail with his grasp, pulling it just hard enough to make you look back at him, your jaw agape in ecstasy and your eyes shut in pure bliss as he continued.

the room was filled with the sounds of your labored breathing, the slap of skin against skin, and the occasional grunt of effort from chris as he pushed yourself onto him. your hair that had been done with such effort before leaving the house earlier was a mess, stray strands sticking to the sheets, your face, smudged in mascara and striken with tears of pleasure had been stuffed into the mattress to conceal your moans, with chris saying something along the lines of "can't let my brothers know how good i'm fucking ya', can i?", but how could you know? you were too drunk on dick to remember. you had already managed to convince chris into letting you have your fourth orgasm of the night, with him slowly coming close to his first, not even sure if you could handle a fifth, but it was quite easy to tell that you were getting there, your body from the knees below trembling off the bed and your cunt spazzing around his member was everything you both needed to know. you screampt (is that a word??) into the pillows as your release washed over you, coating his dick in your cum as his own orgasm followed soon after, his hips spazzing and cock twitching inside your wet walls before he spilled his seed inside of you, loosening his grip on your neck entirely as he wiped the sweat of his forehead with the back of his hand, satdified when he pulled out to view the sticky mess spilling out of you.

[idontcare4urmom]

ZAYA MY BABY💗🥹

here is mine

🏷️ !! @chromesturn @themattgirl17 @le4hsblog @dirtylittleheart333 @arresiive @chrispotatos @ruerues-things17 and so many more that i am for sure forgetting🥲

🎶✨when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favourite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨

I LOVE THIS SHIT TY!!!

No pressure tags!!! @issysh3ll @sturnioz @sturniolo-fann @sturnihoelooo @heartlessturniolos @streamermattsgf @sturniolosiphone @muwapsturniolo @sturniololoverr @patscorner

[idontcare4urmom]

ughhh thank you for the tag i love this😭

this is my core i think

no pressure tags 🏷️ : @mattsbrowser @cherib3lla @rorylovesmatt @chrislova

how do you see yourself as an aesthetic moodboard???

no pressure tags just thought this would be fun!! @pr3ttyf4wn @patscorner @sturnioloshacker @chrispotatos @chrislilcumslvt @endereies @fratbrochrisgf @flouvela @freshloveforthefit @heartlessturniolos @pouring-rains @too-efn-old-to-be-here

[idontcare4urmom]

i have been waiting for a period simulator for months now😒😒

are my video ideas valid

tell me more ideas to add

[idontcare4urmom]

it’s so disappointing to think that they had to settle down and talk about it with her to come into that conclusion,that should have never have happened in the first place,and the fact that this isn’t the first time happening in a fandom that is comprised by mostly girls (dolan twins situation ifykyk) cause they can’t simply accept the realization of their fantasies being destroyed!!😕

the fact that the triplets and madi came to a conclusion that she shouldn’t be in their videos anymore because some of yall mfs are disrespectful is crazy. madi is such a kind soul and yall are just jealous of the fact she’s closer to the triplets than yall ever will be. people need to stop and realize that what they say does have an impact on other people’s lives. madi is soooooo loved and i hope she knows that. she never ever deserved the hate she’s been getting all because she’s hanging out with three grown men. i genuinely hope yall mfs rot in hell because what the fuck are you hating on her for?? what are you getting out of it..?

if you have a problem with what i’m saying. i’m talking about YOU.

[idontcare4urmom]

masterlist guide⋆·˚ ༘ *

fics✧.*

wrong (smut ♡) "your dad found a new woman on his life after one year of your mom's death,so you are forced to live all together after a lot of pressure,but what you didn't know yet is that her son is a total temping being that will send you over the edge..in many ways."

blurbs-‘๑’-

attention pleaser bf (smut ♡)

stalker neighbour (smut ♡)

book girl reader x bf (smut ♡)

headcanons ღ

touchy bf (fluff and smut ♡✫)

fics✧.*

little red dress (smut ♡) "you were aware of the effect you had on your boyfriend,but that didn’t stopped you from wanting him to drool all over you,there was a party on the town and you got dressed up until Chris sees you and completely loses it."

watch your mouth (smut ♡) "you make the terrible mistake of quip referring to your ex’s name and behaviour during an argument with your boyfriend Chris,leading to things taking a wild twist when his possessive impulses take over."

blurbs-‘๑’- nothing yet..

headcanons ღ

dad Chris (fluff✫)

[idontcare4urmom]

ohhh MYYY ISIAISJAJ😩😩

── .✦. ──

this is the 3rd time today you’ve caught yourself staring at matts arms, if it wasn’t his arms it was his hands. the way the veins spread out and then trailed up to his forearms, you were practically drooling.

he knows this too, he’s caught you staring at him multiple times. he hasn’t told you anything yet though, watching you watch his every move when he wears a tank top or when he’s playing videos games with his brothers, he knows you’re staring.

how could you not though?? he was basically teasing you at this point, like the other day for example, he had gotten some new rings and was desperate to show you them.

“sweetheart come look at these new rings i got” you make your way to your shared bedroom and see him staring at his hands, flexing them making the veins more prominent. that infamous grin while doing so is telling you everything you needed to know.

your eyes fixating on his hands immediately, the way he stretched out his fingers to show off the rings made your thighs clench.

noticing the gleam across your face made his grin widen, “you like them doll? or are ya’ gonna keep ogling at them hm?” he takes your hand into his and start peppering kisses to your knuckles. you couldn’t take it anymore, his teasing words, his stupid grin, just him. you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him into you, your lips locking with his and you feel a hand cup your jaw and the other grip onto your hair.

“y’think you’re so fucking slick huh? staring at me like that with your thighs clenched like i wouldn’t notice, needy girl” he continues down your neck as his hands roam down your body, you gasp at the sudden movement of you being picked up. you’re back now lying against his white sheets “pl..please! matt- need you s’bad” you whine “gotta be more specific than that baby, what do you need from me sweet girl?” he grips onto your legs and places them on his shoulders “pl-please baby.. don’t t-tease me-“

your voice becoming more and more needy “aw, poor thing can’t take a little bit of teasing? such a desperate whore.” he starts sliding off your shorts, those being thrown and forgotten somewhere in the room while he stuffs your lace panties in his back pocket.. “so soaked f’me, all this over what? my hands?” he laughs in your face, tracing his fingers up and down your slick. you yelp out once you feel him slap your cunt, that same stupid grin on his face as he watched you squirm.

“fuck matt- come on pleasee, been such a g-good girl f’you” you grind against his hand, aching for any kind stimulation what so ever. “okay sweetheart, i guess you’ve had enough” you hum in agreement, you feel his slim fingers dip into you, the feeling of the cool metal from the rings sending goosebumps down your spine. “o-oh! mhm.. please!” you pleaded “yeah? s’this all you needed baby? dumb girl just needed my fingers thats all”

- avery’s note ˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡-

first smut!! i was thinking of making this a full fic but i didnt.. anyways school has been beating me up pray for me 😞 okayy well thats all for now bye i love youu ᥫ᭡ !!

[idontcare4urmom]

new moot heyy !!

heyyy babyy!!💗 hru

[idontcare4urmom]

shut the fuck up i am done with all his teasing lately,like that man is doing and saying this type of things on purpose i just know it🤷🏻‍♀️

[idontcare4urmom]

imagine matt being all cuddly with your boobs while laying together😭

wait cause i can see the preview of being together in bed just chilling and chating or scrolling through your phones,and he just won't stop squeezing them through your shirt,and not in a necessary sexaul way😭 "matt can you get your hands off my fucking chest?" "mph,no,they are just too comfy"