#or should i be upset that hes doing it with three fucking episodes left in his whole era

[zombieweek-g]

aint no fucking way this show is about to try and get me to buy a romantic subplot between two characters who’ve barely fucking had interactions between one another now

[tobiasdrake]

Ranma 1/2 reboot episode 4 opens with a deep cut.

Yeah, we're opening on the Ranma 1/2 SNES fighting games they used to have. Because fandom's like that sometimes.

(Now release a modern one.)

I was wondering if it'd be Ryoga or Shampoo introduced next.

(Because I don't actually remember the order they introduce characters in. XD)

Was hoping for Shampoo but I'll gladly take Ryoga. I hope we get to Ukyo before the end of the season. I don't expect we will. But I hope so.

IT BEGINS

Ryoga's legendary inability to find his way. This is a character who can be justified for crossovers by just wandering by. How did he get to Middle Earth? He's just that fucking lost, that's how.

My very first Ranma 1/2 experience, before I knew what the anime was, came from my cousin cosplaying Ryoga at an anime con. He rode an elevator up and down for like an hour just screaming, "Where's the door!?"

I need y'all to properly appreciate the route Ryoga took to Furinkan High School in Nerima.

Do you see that black circle? That is Tokyo. That is where he is trying to go.

The red circle is Shikoku. When he stops the boar and asks for directions to Furinkan High, this is where he is. He's got a long way to go.

The blue circle is Hokkaido, the second place where he stops to ask directions. He has made a complete journey from one end of Japan to the other without ever running into Tokyo.

He's just. So much fun.

"RANMA OUR TIME FOR DESTINED BATTLE HAS COME"

"...who are you again?"

Is pretty much the story of his life from here on out.

Ryoga is kind of a big deal. Of all of Ranma's rivals, he's the rival. He's the guy. Kuno's really more of a recurring nuisance and Mousse is more quirky than anything. Ryoga is the guy who really keeps Ranma on his toes.

Together, these two boys have a very long journey ahead.

...

Which only makes it more amazing that their rivalry is founded in something so petty and ridiculous, but that is the way of Ranma 1/2. Ryoga is homicidally furious because he was supposed to fight Ranma, but Ranma only waited three days for him to arrive at the vacant lot behind Ryoga's house rather than giving him the four days it took him. Ranma stood him up. The coward.

And all over a curry bun.

This is the magic of Ryoga Hibiki. He is an utterly absurd buffoon of a man who takes himself deathly serious. Blissfully oblivious to how entirely ridiculous he is.

He is the Tom to Ranma's Jerry but he thinks he's Vegeta.

Technically, it's his curse that he's so furious about. But. Like. He was already mad enough to follow Ranma to China. With his sense of direction. So pinning it on the curse is deflecting. Ryoga has a longstanding enmity towards Ranma born of a million micro-aggressions compounding into a spongey hatred that can't be easily untangled.

You can't just give him a bunch of week-old bread and then it's all good.

He doesn't even remember he's mad about that. Longstanding hatred eventually loses sight of why it ever started to begin with.

(And besides, Ryoga has more recent things to be upset about.)

I like the subtle build-up they lay out to the revelation that Ryoga too has a Jusenkyo curse. Starting when he says this.

It's interesting that he knows that. He should only know that Ranma stood him up and then left town. But he knows Genma took Ranma to China.

There's also his primary weapon that he fights with for most of the episode.

The story lingers on the fact that Ryoga's umbrella is ridiculously heavy. Even Akane can't lift it. The intense weight of the umbrella serves as a yardstick to show how incredibly strong Ryoga is.

And, later, how strong and determined to protect Akane Ranma is.

But there is one more interesting fact about Ryoga's umbrella that the narrative lets slip past without remarking on it: The fact that it's an umbrella. It's almost as if he's afraid of something in particular.

Something you might use an umbrella, specifically, to protect yourself from.

(Again, the way Ranma 1/2 integrates the malevolent effects of something so universal and ever-present as water into its storytelling, comedy, and action is so much fun.)

And it's in the way he takes personal offense at Ranma's comparatively benign curse.

Like. Yeah, Ranma has to suffer gender dysphoria sometimes but he did get off easy. At least he stays human. Other curse-bearers face a variety of drawbacks that Ranma doesn't have to deal with.

Nobody is going to try to cook and eat Ranma.

Of course, human misery is not judged on a curve. Ranma can be miserable with his gender dysphoria and be better off than other curse-bearers. Both of those things can be true.

But the way Ryoga loses his shit over Ranma's curse is another piece of well-placed foreshadowing about the true nature of his grudge.

Lastly, something I find... interesting... is this moment.

I need to unpack this. Ryoga's razor-sharp belt comes spinning down and slices off Akane's hair, with the implication that if she hadn't turned around to yell at Ranma just now, it would have been her head.

Ranma fucked up yet again in the middle of their argument and hurt Akane's feelings with the stupid-ass shit he says. Leading to Akane storming around, then whipping around to argue with Ranma right at a critical moment that saved her life.

But what really makes this fascinating is that it wasn't Ryoga that almost killed her by accident just now.

It wasn't not Ryoga. But it wasn't just Ryoga.

Ryoga brought the razor belt. But it was Ranma who kicked the belt out of Ryoga's hand. Ranma who sent it up into the air, and nearly brought it down on Akane's neck by accident.

It wasn't Ryoga that nearly killed her. And it wasn't Ranma either. It was the fight. And it was, specifically, a kick that was meant to end the fight, an attack Ranma threw in self-defense because the realization that he hurt Akane's feelings made everything Ryoga's about right now stop mattering.

When Ranma threw that kick, he no longer cared about whatever this shit is. He was trying to fix what he'd just screwed up with Akane, only for the unforeseeable consequences of choices he didn't realize in the heat of the moment that he was even making to suddenly come down on her like a razor blade.

It was his cruel words that put her in that spot and his shortsighted reflex that sent the blade into the air. But it was also his attempt to apologize that made her turn around and saved her from a much more grievous injury.

I don't.

Really.

Know what to do with that.

It's just. Interesting.

[pterodactylterrace]

*less than two months ago*

Beloved? You sure about that Condal? Just… forgot about the mass murder at the coronation? Never happened? Not one of those small folk remembered when she killed hundreds of them for absolutely no reason other than to stare at Aegon and then fly off?

If you were going for a more realistic reaction, they would have been cheering that the dragon and dragon rider that slaughtered so many of them answered for their crimes.

So, according to Condal, hanging a dozen rat catchers (I believe?) to ensure no other assassination attempts befell the royal family would turn all the small folk against Aegon, but the dragon that killed HUNDREDS of them was “beloved”? Did Aegon not meet the quota for small folk slaughter to be beloved or something? Is that it? You have to kill at least 200 before they go from hating you to loving you?

Someone get Condal’s dumbass out of the writing room. Let like 3 hardcore fans take his place. One TB, one TG, one Team Smallfolk. They will make a MUCH better and balanced show. And maybe something interesting will happen. I mean, do we really need five episodes of Rhaenyra’s council not listening? And huge chunks of those episodes just being a bunch of old men squabbling about “women can’t!” While Rhaenyra continues doing fuck all but getting upset about it?

Jesus, show us Aemond decimating the blockade with Vhagar now that Meleys’ patrolling isn’t an issue. Show us Sunfyre’s wounds and the men left to guard him! FFS, stop just standing around talking about what they should do and actually DO something already! Fuck, after Jaehaerys assassination why didn’t they all jump on their dragons and just burn down Dragonstone in the middle of the night? Riders without their dragons are just people. Dragon fire can cook them through the stone walls (see Harrenhal) but nooooooo. Just have a bunch of scenes of people blaming each other and doing nothing about it. Super compelling TV.

Season 1 I rewatched several times because there was usually something going on. Season 2, I was able to catch husband up on the entire season in under two minutes. “Aegon wants to be a good king, his son gets killed by assassins, Rhaenyra grieves the loss of her son, Daemon left for Harrenhal after Rhaenyra found out he sent the assassins. Cole leads an army through the crown lands, sets a trap at Rook’s Rest, Aegon drunkenly interferes and ends up getting roasted by Vhagar. Aemond is now regent.” Tada, five episodes summed up. Hit all the major plot points. Most of which weren’t even impactful.

The only two major events have been B&C and RR. We are over halfway through the season, and we have had less action and interesting things happening than the last three episodes of season 1.

We were promised all out war. Is the all out war in the room with us?

[britcision]

So.

Watched The Giggle.

Guys.

Guys.

About 10-15 years ago I went on an Old Who binge. Like, raided Daily Motion, downloaded the full episodes list from Hartnell to Baker and then every episode with the Master or the Rani

And went for every “lost episode”, a bunch of which are on Audible

And

You know who my favourite was?

My most favourite Old Who thing that I went on a jillion tweet rant about how they should bring back immediately?

The fucking Toymaker

I LOVED him

Favourite guy

And you know the other thing? That… complicates the memory?

I don’t visualise. At all, ever, so I also don’t really remember things in visual aspects, so not being able to visualise what those episodes looked like? Meant nothing to me

That’s normal

I spent the whole damn episode with just the very most nostalgia and delight and also yes, the feeling of “this is so very familiar but I don’t know what it should look like”

Like… I knew it was black and white cuz it was Hartnell

But I couldn’t remember a single visual aspect of those episodes, but it still felt so… perfect. So right

Guys

Guys

There fucking ISN’T video of the first three fucking episodes in that arc. There just isn’t. It’s gone. We have the audio and some stills and some saint has made a kinda audiobook version and then shackled themselves to Audible for some ungodly reason and given us the arc that way

I WAS TRYING TO REMEMBER VIDEO FOR EPISODES I KNEW I LOVED BUT HAD ACTUALLY NEVER SEEN BUT I COULD NOT TELL BECAUSE I AM GODDAMN APHANTASMIC AND CAN’T VISUALISE THE EPISODE I JUST WATCHED

this is all the Toymaker’s fault and Neil Patrick Harris was so fucking perfect and I loved that he came in to do a musical number and then left for no fucking reason

He gave me life and also epic catch was Fine I Guess but someone needs to challenge the Toymaker to a ttrpg, particularly one like DnD or Pathfinder that does not have a win condition because I feel like that would upset him so much but also he wouldn’t notice for like 8 years

[xf-cases-solved]

S1E13: Beyond the Sea

Case: A young couple is kidnapped in North Carolina, and the authorities have five days to find them before they're murdered. Unfortunately, they have no leads, except for the testimony of Luther Lee Boggs—a serial killer Mulder put behind bars years ago—who is claiming to have psychic knowledge that will lead them to the missing children. In some serious turning of the tables, Mulder is skeptical of Boggs' claims, whereas Scully—whose father just died, and who is desperate for just one more message from him to know that they didn't part on bad terms—finds herself believing Boggs, much to her chagrin. After Mulder is shot, Scully is on her own to work with Boggs, leading to some sexy fucking "Silence of the Lambs" -esque scenes that make this episode not just a top tier s1 episode, but a top tier episode of all time. Mulder tears up his New York Knicks shirt (he probably has like seventeen tho, so it's okay), Scully is scared to believe, and Brad Dourif puts his entire goddamn pussy into playing Luther Boggs. A+++, fam.

Does someone die in the cold open: Yes! But it wasn't a crime. Scully gets the dreaded "middle of the night phone call" and learns that her father just died. (Even tho she just saw him sitting in her armchair across the room. Say what???) 

Does Mulder present a slideshow: No. 

Does the evidence survive the investigation: This is another where it depends on what you mean by evidence. Evidence of the actual, literal crime? Yes, that actually worked out like how normal police work is meant to go if you're good at your job. Evidence of Boggs' psychic abilities, however? Unfortunately, proof of those went with him to the gas chamber. 

Whodunit: Lucas Henry, who is either Boggs' accomplice, or somebody Boggs keeps having psychic visions of. It's up to you to decide.

Convictions: Lucas Henry would have been convicted if he hadn't crashed through several floors and fell on his face directly onto some concrete, so we'll give it to 'em.

Did they solve it: While the supernatural element remains a mystery, the crime itself is solved. This one is a resounding yes!

[how do i determine if a case is solved? check the scale here: x]

THIS EPISODE IS SPONSORED BY: Confusing and upsetting your loved ones by appearing to them after your death. Look, we all die—it's a fact of life!—but just because you're dead doesn't mean you have to be dull. When accidents strike, illnesses rage, or the clock has simply run out, keep the fun going by confusing and upsetting your loved ones by appearing to them after your death. By keeping the excitement of living alive by causing trauma to those closest to you as they mourn your loss, you're guaranteeing your time in the afterlife is off to a great start!

*Confusing and upsetting your loved ones by appearing to them after your death is especially recommended for those with loved ones who are particularly skeptical, or who are looking for answers to ambiguities left behind after your departure.

Try it today! Or, well, when you die, we mean. Which might be today!

***

General Total Stats:

(green means stat has changed since last ep; red means new stat added to list)

Total Cases *Definitively* Solved So Far: 6 (holy shit, three in a row?? unprecedented!)

Total Number of "Mulder/Scully, it's me" phone calls: 1

Total Number of Times Scully Has Conveniently Not Seen Something Crucial: 4 (Mulder was actually the one who was out of the room whenever Boggs said something that resonated with Scully)

Total Number of Times Mulder Has Been in Mortal Danger: 5 (pew pew) 

Total Number of Times Scully Has Been in Mortal Danger: 3 ½ (half point bc she should have died, but she had that warning from Boggs, so it was kind of a toss up) 

Total Number of Sexually Charged, Uncomfortably intimate, and/or Flirty Moments Between Friendly Coworkers: 8 (i changed the stat to add in "uncomfortably intimate" bc especially in these first few seasons, a lot of the MSR moments are more like... buddy, i get that you're going through it, but that is your coworker, why are you holding them so gently with so much love in your eyes? anyway, Mulder cupping her face in the beginning, and Mulder putting his hand on her gigantic 90s pant suit shoulder pad at the end are the ones i'm counting)

Total Number of Autopsies Scully Has Performed On Screen: 1

Total Number of Times Scully Plays Doctor: 1

Total Number of Times Mulder Talks to an Informant: 5 

Total Number of Times People Making Out in a Car are Hurt or Killed: 1 (new stat!)

Total Number of Nosebleeds: 4

Total Number of Times Someone Says "Trust No One": 1 

Total Number of Times Someone Says "I Want to Believe": 2 (new stat! first one was actually in that snore fest "Conduit," but i didn't want to go back and add it since i just considered making it a stat now)

Total Number of Cigarettes Cigarette Smoking Man Has Smoked: 2

Total Number of Maggie Scully sightings: 1 (new stat!)

Total Number of Alex Krycek Sightings: 0 :(

Total Number of Times I Had to Look Up What State the Episode Takes Place in Even Though I Literally Just Watched It: 3 ½

Total Number of Times I Had to Look at an Episode's Wikipedia Page to Fill This Out Because It Was Fucking Confusing and/or Too Boring for Me to Pay Attention: 2 (we stan Beyond the mother fucking Sea)

[lurkingshan]

Step by Step Episode 11 (OF DOOM)

Warning: I really, really did not like this episode. If you’re trying to keep positive vibes you should scroll on by, friends! 

Welp. I told a few friends last week that my biggest disappointment would be if, after missing the mark on the emotional payoff of the slow burn and speed running the relationship, the show chose to break them up and do a time jump rather than staying with them in the present time and working through the conflicts they set up. And here we are! I wish I’d been wrong about where this was heading. Shouts to @waitmyturtles and @neuroticbookworm for holding me down while this show fell apart on me, I’ve been all in a tizzy about it, because I really loved it for awhile there.

This episode, yet again, felt like a disjointed mess. After last week’s cliffhanger, the idea of Pat resigning to get away from the predatory office gossip fell away within a few quick scenes. Instead the tension disappeared as the plot brought them into a bubble with only their most supportive colleagues and we swerved into a retread of the Put nonsense and a new plot about Jeng and Pat fighting to save the digital marketing team via the power of Put’s quasi-celebrity and Instagram likes. Or something. I honestly couldn’t tell you the details of what they were trying to accomplish, I was too distracted by my incredulity to pay close attention to this very sudden fake problem that they were obviously going to conquer (that, my friends, is what we call conflict with no stakes). Meanwhile, the show suddenly wants me to care about Jaab and Jen again - enough to devote a big portion of the penultimate episode’s runtime to them, what a choice - after doing fuck all with that plot for six weeks. It’s a no from me. 

It doesn’t matter anyway, because soon enough we’re time skipping again! After resolving the work challenge subplot we speed past another three months of Pat and Jeng’s relationship without addressing any of their issues, and I guess I’m supposed to be at peace with being a full nine months into their relationship with no onscreen emotional advancement? But I gotta be honest, y’all. I am not. You just don’t do this with a slow burn romance narrative. You can’t spend 80% of your runtime building to something that you have no intention of paying off, and no amount of thinking about what else this show is trying to say is going to convince me they did proper justice to the relationship. I already broke down why I didn’t think the episode 10 culmination got us there, and nothing that happened in this episode changed my opinion.

And all of this is leading to yet another time jump - two entire years this time - after the big reveal that Jeng doesn’t believe in Pat at all and literally bought his success, Evil Daddy knew it all along and waited for a choice moment to deploy the info for maximum damage while twirling his villain mustache, and Pat is finally quitting for real and dumping Jeng for good measure.

And ya know what? GOOD FOR PAT. I was completely on his side in this decision. If there’s one bright spot in this episode (other than Chot, always Chot) it’s Pat getting himself together enough to realize he deserves better than the bullshit he’s been getting from Put and Jeng and walking on out. So Jeng and Pat are now broken up, but I never got invested in their relationship in the first place, because we barely saw it, let alone got the chance to live in and feel it. I wasn’t even upset while watching this breakup scene - it left me emotionally indifferent. Which is maybe the worst thing I can say about a dramatic climax in a story.

I guess next week we’ll meet Jeng and Pat again two years in the future and get some kind of happy ending. I’m gonna stick around for the finale and cross my fingers that we get all the epilogue fluff we have definitely earned, but sadly, this show has lost me.

[messenger-of-stupidity]

However, Your Mother

Welcome back to another Shaw Mates Group Chat Post that totally hasn't been sitting completed in my drafts for over a month because I forgot to post it nope not at all that would be utterly ridiculous ahahaha

This is pretty short though because my brain has been filled with angst for the past several months and crack isn't really doing much for me atm.

CW: Angel is back on their crack shit but keeps getting rejected, Baabe is living for the gossip, Sweetheart is a bit more active, Sam just wants some normality but he should know better by now fr fr

Actual CW: Crack, Cursing, Shenanigans, GN Listeners, Any gendered terms are purely for the memes and should not be taken seriously in any kind of way.

<- Previous ---- Masterlist ---- Next ->

Sweetheart: My supervisor is literally dog turds

Angel: i dont know whether to be happy i wasnt first or upset that u didnt say cat litterbox droppings

Baabe: what happened invisi?

Sweetheart: Were circling back to that nickname later. Whats wrong is that theyre making me stay late

Angel: but but 2nites mate nioght

Sweetheart: I know it is thats why Im upset

Baabe: theres only one thing left to do. we cause a error in the computer system and hold their information hostage so that way invisi can sneak out. get it? sneak? cause theyre a stealth? im so funny.

Sam: I knew it was too much to hope that for once this was a normal and legal conversation, and yet I did so regardless. Good lord.

Angel: vamp daddy

Angel: welcome to another episode of davey is gonna kill me

Baabe: whatd you do?

Angel: hol up a sec i need to wait for invisi and vamp daddy to be here

Baabe: if this was discord we could @ them.

Angel: omg it would be so fun to have a mates disc call

Baabe: IT WOULD

Sam: This is the highest level of my tolerance. I don't think I could handle a group call with all of you. Especially without David to monitor.

Angel: davey do be a sexy supervisor vroom vroom

Sam: I'm never going to be able to look at David the same now. Thank you for that.

Angel: yw now where is my invisible hoe

Baabe: imma call them.

Angel: that just leaves vamp daddy and me (っ˘ڡ˘ς)

Sam: Oh dear lord.

Angel: nope just me

Sweetheart: Whatd I miss

Baabe: angel fucked up again.

Sweetheart: Oh good

Angel: cool now that everyones here

Angel: how does one get dough off high ceilings and back into the kitchen

Sam: Do I even want to know how you managed that?

Baabe: by asking you have become complicit. congrats!

Sam: Shit.

Sweetheart: Before I tell you I wanna know how tf you managed to do that

Angel: so i was making pizza rite

Baabe: its gonna be a multi text situation. neat.

Angel: and the impulsive urge to yeet that motherfucker at the ceiling with the force of a thousands suns came upon this bitch

Sam: And that should be a lesson in control, kiddos.

Angel: but i couldnt do it in the kitchen because i wasnt in the kitchen

Sweetheart: Then where tf were you

Angel: in davey and me bedroom

Baabe: omg this keeps getting better. i cant wait to tell Ash.

Angel: we have hella high ceilings so i got on the bed and threw the dough at the ceiling

Angel: now its stuck and davey is gonna come home any minute

Sweetheart: I lied I have no idea how to get pizza dough off high ceilings I just wanted to hear the story hehehehe

Angel: ((유∀유|||))

Baabe: all mates are wonderful. all werewolves are awesome (except chrissy all my homies hate chrissy) but Ash is by far the best. <3

Angel: omg i literally luv my house husband

Sweetheart: Disagree what evidence do you have

Baabe: three words invisi.

Angel: i love you

Baabe: no

Angel: rejected by my waifu im never gonna financially recover alexa play the wheels on the bus

Baabe: breakfast. in. bed.

Sweetheart: Three words for you

Angel: i love you

Sweetheart: No

Angel: rejected twice in one day by my waifus alexa play arabian nights

Sweetheart: Crumbs. In. Bed.

Sam: Why was this what I had to come in to?

Angel: sam wont reject me will u vamp daddy

Sam: Without hesitation I absolutely will.

Angel: im literally gonna kms ༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽

[darkshrimpemotions]

One thing I can't let go is people trying to claim Dean didn't have any mommy issues until the writers "shoehorned" them in to make the Mary resurrection arc work. Like did we even watch the same show??? You can see that man's mommy issues from SPACE.

Like yes, his daddy issues are closer to the surface and a result of active fuck-ups rather than total absence, but the mommy issues are still very much there. Starting with being forced to become her substitute at the age of four and ending with being lowkey despised by his dad for being kind of good at it! Just the simple fact that he's never made any sort of peace with her death qualifies, but it's far from the only issue Dean has around his mother.

As far back as season 2, enemies and his subconscious LOVE to dangle specters of Mary in front of him. The djinn in 2x20 What Is And What Should Never Be, for example, primarily uses Mary to keep Dean compliant. John is dead in the dream. Dean and Sam appear to have a strained relationship. But Dean is close to Mary.

Or consider Dean's first journey back to the 70s in 4x03 In The Beginning. Of course that journey served one purpose, as stated by Castiel, of catching Dean up on what Azazel actually did to Sam. But it also served Heaven's secondary purpose of beginning to drive a wedge between Sam and Dean, primarily using Mary to do so. Partly by having Dean witness all of this alone, and giving him yet another personal tie to Mary that Sam lacks. But also attempting to tie Mary's death more securely to Sam in Dean's mind, and establish Sam as tainted from the beginning to weaken Dean's sense of brotherly love and obligation.

This latter, of course, didn't work, but that they made the attempt at all speaks volumes IMO. If Dean didn't have any issues around Mary, she wouldn't be such a handy lever for antagonists to pull. Dean's desperation to save Mary in this episode is so directly tied to Dean's lifetime of trauma, his idea that the weight of the whole world rests on his shoulders, and his abandonment issues. His conversation with Castiel in this episode even explicitly confirms this: should he succeed in undoing Mary's death, he will undo his entire life up to this point. He knows this, and it isn't a bug in his plan, it's a feature.

In Dean's mind, everything that has ever been wrong in his life stems from this one moment. Mary's death. If he can fix that, he can fix everything. If he saves Mary, he can save John, save Sam, hell maybe the entire world while he's at it. And buried much deeper: if he saves Mary, maybe he can fix himself. Remember, at this point Dean is freshly returned from Hell. He feels broken, in brand new and terrible ways. But maybe, if he saves his mom, whatever it is in him that's wrong gets fixed. Maybe it never breaks at all.

The fact that he tries again in 5x13 The Song Remains the Same, even knowing already that it won't work based on his previous experience, is just heartbreaking. There's still a four-year-old child in Dean's heart, holding his baby brother as he watches his childhood home burn down. He's so fixated on that night and the life he might have had without it. Even knowing that the dominoes that wrecked their lives started falling long before that, it's still all about that night for him.

Then of course, we have 5x16 Dark Side of the Moon just three episodes later. We first see Mary in Heaven in their old home's kitchen making Dean a pie, then getting an upsetting call from John. Echoes of abandonment permeate the scene as Dean comforts her and promises to never leave her. Dean knows even as he says it that they had very little time left together by the time this memory happened, and knows too that he will have to leave her soon as they try to find their way out of this maze of memories. These echoes are brought home when, in the next scene with Mary, Dean attempts to leave her only to have the illusion turn harsh and cold, taunting him with the idea that he was the one that was left.

"I never loved you," she taunts him. "You were my burden. I was shackled to you. And look what it got me."

"I was dead. The one silver lining was that at least I was away from you. Everybody leaves you, Dean. You noticed? Mommy. Sweetheart. Even Sam. You ever ask yourself why? Maybe it’s not them. Maybe, it’s you."

And there it is. Underneath the grief over Mary's death, the missing her, the inability to accept any life that he could have because it won't be the life he would have had if she never died...the feeling, that he beats himself up over, that she left him. Not died. Left him. Abandoned him. Deep down, a part of him feels like his mom left him. That her dying was an act of abandonment, a betrayal. And he CANNOT look directly at it, because that feels like a betrayal in itself, of the memories he has of the loving mother who tucked him in at night and sang him "Hey Jude" instead of a lullaby and made him soup when he was sick.

And buried even deeper: the fear that she never wanted him in the first place.

Dean's issues with Mary go so far beyond "simple" grief at losing her. Mary is at the root of all his other issues, all tangled around her and the night she died. Exacerbated, even actively cultivated, no doubt, by John's A+ parenting. But Dean's hazy memory of Mary, the loss of her, and his fixation on that loss are at the core of his fear of abandonment, his lack of self-worth, and his feeling that he has to save everyone. As well as his deep fear that the thing wrong with his life isn't some childhood trauma or hunting or his dad, or even his time in Hell. But that it's just him, and has been all along.

That's why the resurrection arc works so well. With Mary back from the dead, Dean is forced to confront the feelings of abandonment he pushed aside in favor of preserving her memory. When she fails to live up to that memory, it catalyzes that confrontation even further. He doesn't blame Mary for everything that happened to him and Sam because she's actually to blame. He blames Mary because, deep down, her death has always been the root of everything else in his mind. The one thing that, if he could only fix it, he could fix everything else as well. And seeing living proof in front of him that this isn't true just forces him to face everything he's buried his entire life. Forces him to actually confront the mommy issues at last. And it hurts, and it sucks, but like I said in my other post. It was so necessary.

[all-pacas]

how does retcon sister react to nobody’s fault and the subsequent chase md, or does he not tell her about the details of how it all played out?

She finds out only later. In Better Half a few episodes earlier, they're implied to be getting back in touch after a long absence (she's surprised Chase calls). When the stabbing happens, they're tentatively in touch, but Chase is also in the ICU for a few days and no one else knows to reach out to her — it's not even clear who knows she exists.

And then he doesn't want to tell her because he doesn't want to burden her, Chase also thinks he can and should handle everything by himself. And it's tough, too, because she doesn't have a lot of money and she has a young kid and she can't exactly afford to take off to fly across the world to see Robbie, even if she wants to, and honestly they haven't really seen one another or spoken much in the last few years. Which Chase knows (and so he doesn't want to tell her).

He tells her a couple weeks later. When he's doing better and probably-post nun rebound, when he's a bit more mentally settled. Just calls her up out of the blue all "Hey, so, don't think it's a big deal but I got hurt, by the way." Which of course actually does upset her, because he tried to hide it (and decide on her behalf what she gets to know, what she can handle, because he always acts like she's fragile and one bad day from falling off the wagon when she's been sober for three years, thanks). He always does this! He's such a bastard! But he's always tried to shelter her too, she genuinely barely remembers her mother's death because Robbie did everything he could to keep little kid Ellie distracted and happy and away from the vomit and ass-wiping and occasional violence. She knows he's overprotective, she also thinks he's a coward. (But when she had her son, again in her early twenties, everyone was like oh, you're so young, you're too young for this etc., which she resented of course — she's a little punchy — but it did make her appreciate just how fucked it was that she and her parents expected Robbie to do that at fifteen, with her.) (She still thinks he's a condescending cunt, though.)

But! Deeply complicated and difficult relationship aside! It also upsets her to think of her big brother hurt and alone, like, even if they argue a lot they're still supposed to be a team, against their parents at least, shit-talking their former step-mother at least, he's always sending her money and baby toys for her son, but he won't treat her like an adult and let her help him? (But then it loops back around: Not that she can! Because she doesn't have a great job and she's a single mum and can't afford to fly to America even if she wanted to!)

…So they have another phone fight. A lot of their conversations end that way. But where in the past Ellie usually left it up to her brother to reach out and establish contact, I think this might push her to be a little more proactive going forward. They're all they have left, even if they really can't talk without arguing. The whole Chase MD thing means very little to her (she has no idea who House is besides "isn't that Robbie's boss?"), but I think a year or two post series she finally does visit with her kid, of course Chase absolutely delights in playing with him, showing him off, making Foreman interact with him, etc.

(Foreman is like a) …………you have a sister? and b) super bemused by the fact that Daniela sees Chase as like. This super bossy and assertive know it all type. Completely the opposite of his lazy apathetic work self. Both are true!)

[respectthepetty]

Club Friday Episode 3

I'm watching Club Friday The Series: Moments & Memories, so you don't have to.

It's based on a true story, it's only four episodes so we are already halfway done, all the characters are queer, and IT'S MESSY!

Last week, we left off with Rey proposing to Nart which was bonkers and EVERYTHING was blue because this is about to get depressing.

I've got my wine, and I'm ready for round three of Exes and Oh-Hell-No's.

Why is there an MC for their wedding vows?! Girl, shut up! Having a countdown for a kiss like you're announcing the coming of the New Year fells crusty. No, chick. NO!

Y'all are so stupid for inviting the exes. It's as if you wanted them to stop the wedding with their toxicity. Pun stood in the middle of that aisle FOREVER instead of sitting her ass down, and Pol is standing behind a tree, in white, just smiling away. Y'all welcomed the drama!

NART YOU WERE ALREADY FUCKING POL ON YOUR WEDDING DAY AT THE VENUE IN THE BATHROOM?! I didn't think I'd write this but Rey deserves better than all of these people and if everyone dies except her and her kid, then let it be!

The blues. I'm obsessed.

This boss, Jess, is gonna cause problems. I feel it! But Nart came for him directly. DAMN! If only he could be this direct with Pol instead of fucking him behind his wife's back!

NO, GOD, NO! I need more wine! This is not the way, lady. IT'S NOT THE WAY!

There is not one line that Pol has uttered that I have not loved. He sent Nart a picture of his thighs and Nart came running, so let's not play games here, Nart. Pol owns you, and you like it.

THIS FUCKING CUNT! I love him so much.

This dinner is more awkward than a 2015 and 2016 Thanksgiving meal in America combined. Those were some rough years for family gatherings in the United States, but this shit is worst.

"It's hard to be the middleman" - Then maybe you shouldn't have FUCKED YOUR TOXIC CHEATING EX ON YOUR WEDDING DAY, SIR!

As usual, Rey and Nart invited the drama in just like their wedding day, but unlike Rey who hasn't been in contact with Pun, Nart can't seem to end this even while he is looking at Rey like she will tell him not to go. Nart, make a decision for yourself! WEAK!

Rey where is your hand going?! You can't be crying and thinking about your husband with that slut while you do this. NOT UNDER THESE CONDITIONS, MAMI! NOOOOOOOO!

This show is going to break me in only four episodes. I will forever be changed in the worst way when this is all done. And next week is the last episode, so it will be a fucking disaster.

Jess is going to assault Rey because he is upset that she is the only woman to ever turn him down

Rey is going to smash a bottle over his head and threaten both him and Pol

Rey is going to crawl back to her toxic ex because the woman REFUSES to be single for more than a second

and Nart is going to die or at least he should because the body count has got to go up if Rey ends up with a kid

I AM SO EXCITED!

[rui-drawsbox]

It’s been a while cuz I got struck with every status effect known to man but I can write again. So it is time for episode five :):):):)

K so Mika ain’t doing too hot (ehe perspective shift from where we left arashi)

he is running, and I mean running like hell, running like anyone should be if a scary ass magical knight is chasing you with a pointy object

so he’s crashing through trash cans, jumping over fences, rushing through bushes, ya know, desperately trying to escape and keep his identity hidden

so this chase has been going on for like thirty to forty five minutes at this point (ample time for Arashi to get finished with her clean up work, so she’s on her way home rn)

and Mika finally turned enough corners that the magical knight isnt, so he can finally transform out of his puppet master outfit and hide as a civilian

Though he’s really ruffed up + he doesn’t want to potentially lead the magical knight to Shu if he’s still being chased, so he can’t go home <<33 or go to Nazuna’s house

so he decides to hide out for a bit

anyways it’s about to start raining so he scraps that plan

We cut to arashi who is in her room putting her personal items from school + track away, when she hears a knock at her window (it sounds like the doll from before btw, sound design would use the same sound effect)

she gets startled for a second but when she sees Mika on the other side of the window she chills out

she let’s him in and as soon as she takes in his appearance she starts fussing over him

cuz A. He looks rough, B. His clothes are really roughed up, & C. He’s soaking wet.

she gets him warmed up and takes care of him

they talk for a bit, it’s mostly Arashi asking him what’s going on and Mika dodging and deflecting questions

Arashi asks if it’s anything about Mika’s home life and Mika immediately jumps to defend Shu

to which Arashi is like “you live with him?” (Insert every possible horror story ever scrolling through her mind simply because of what she’s heard from Shu)

and Mika is like “yeah”

(he’s about to drop the orphan bomb) (But when I say orphan I don’t mean his parents are dead or he was abandoned, I mean he just doesn’t have parents)

Anyways Mika is about to feed Arashi the lines he’s been given by Shu in case his lack of parents is ever questioned (lying time) “I’ve lived with Oshi-san since my parents died.”

Anyways Arashi reacts like a normal person, upset, sympathetic, and concerned, and Mika brushes that concern off by being like “I prefer it this way :)” while Arashi is even more like “:( I’m really sorry about that”

Arashi decides to switch the subject because things are getting mad uncomfy

so she asks him to join their friend group for Karaoke on Friday (canonically it is Thursday so that would be the next day)

Now, he isn’t showing it but Mika is actually really excited

he at first, politely declines, but after thinking for a moment he is like “well, maybe” before ultimately settling on “I’ll go if I get permission from Shu :)”

this response really doesn’t help his case from earlier about his home life.

but arashi lets it slide with a weird look and then an “ok :]”

this girl deals with too much, she is just letting shit happen at this point cause she just wants to exist in peace.

anyways we get to watch Mika go to the apartment again after he leaves

the difference in the lighting should make the apartment look quite different, like different to the point that the audience can’t fucking tell it’s the same place. Also camera angles should be completely different.

You know those scenes in movies when a teen gets back from sneaking out and their parent is waiting for them in the dark and when they get inside the lights turn on, well this is a bit like that but the lights are on and the worried parent is just Shu, who is A.not a parent & B. Not mad, just super fucking worried

Shu has been stress baking btw, so there are like three trays of croissants on the counter.

“Kagehira, your absence caused me immense stress, I couldn’t work on the new outfits we were making because you weren’t here. You agreed to be my model and-” this is Shu’s stupid as roundabout way of saying “I was super worried and I couldn’t get on with my day without you. Please don’t worry me like that again”

Mika can kind of tell at this point cuz he’s known Shu for so long. So he just apologizes and doesn’t take what Shu’s saying out loud to heart.

they talk for a little bit about their days

He asks if he can go out for karaoke tomorrow night with friends

Shu has to stop for a moment, because, Mika… having friends, on one hand he’s happy for Mika, in fact he really really likes that Mika is growing as a person(there’s a plot reason for this), but on the other, he’s horribly jealous, the worst part is that he can’t tell where the jealousy is from. Is it from Mika having friends? Or is it from other people spending time with Mika? He can’t tell, it’s a very muddy feeling.

Shu takes a second to answer, but ultimately, he says yes.

Mika thanks him but Shu does stop him before he can head to bed.

“Seeing as you’re going out with friends, I think it would only be fitting that you wear something nice. Come, we must make you an outfit”

anyways we cut to Leo and Arashi setting up for karaoke

Ritsu and Tsukasa arrive a little bit after them

and then Mika arrives

anyways the besties gush over his outfit (it isn’t in his style yet, it’s still very much an outfit with Itsuki written all over it but it’s tailored to fit Mika and it’s really pretty, I’m thinking white Victorian shirt but cut a bit more modern + the green broach that Shu wears in his winter outfit but on Mika’s collar)

Karaoke is going well

the besties introduce Mika and Tsukasa to one another but they’re both kind of shy so their interactions are very “scared animal meets scared animal”

leo is slaying as usual

ritsu is being a little man

Tsukasa is slowly coming out of his shell

arashi is slaying

Mika is trying to figure out what music he actually likes cuz all he listens to is Shu playing the piano and his recordings of that

ritsu recommends something (horror movies bros) and mother of god does Mika vibe with it, so he starts getting into it

anyways karaoke goes on

Leo asks how Ritsu how Rei is doing cuz one of Rei’s bands song’s pops up in the recommended list and Ritsu gets mad <

anyways he starts complaining about Rei

he doesn’t stop <<33

Arashi asks when he’s gonna be in town again

Ritsu is like “in a week 😡😡”

and Arashi is like “Oh! We can all meet up, I know Adonis will be stoked to see him :)” while Ritsu is just like “yeah 😒😡”

anyways karaoke ends, no one really noticed that Mika didn’t really eat except for Tsukasa but it’s fine cuz we know how Tsukasa is gonna handle this (by asking him later 👍👍)

we cut to arashi who is about to go to sleep

when she finally does she wakes up in this weird starry dreamscape, but it’s super vivid and she’s like “huh, what? Where am I?”

Anyways, I would write more (as in another ask tonight) but I am tired, so just episode five for now. I’ve got like 6-10 planned already I just need to write em out. I’ll be back soon <<33

Can’t wait to see your take on this Rui <<<333

Hii!! Hello mrMisano from march 3rd!!!

Mika running from the random Knight that wants to beat his ass:

perfect start of chapter, i love it, 10/10

the owners of the trash cans or bushes may not love it tho 😔 imagine youre looking thru the window and see two kids in cosplay running and making a mess on the street/your front garden

ok now hear me out, i have two ideas for his detransformation: A) his outfit disintegrates into gold strings only leaving his civil look or B) he's hiding on a dark alley to the point where only his silhouette is visible, and when he steps into the light he's dressed normally, like this

man i love this man he's so damn fine (it's the choker for me)

also mika being unintentionally creepy is the best, nothing better than giving your bestfriend nearly a heart attack

and i can totally see Arashi trying her best to keep a straight face when Mika tells her about his paren'ts *badumtss* so she doesn't make it seems like she's gonna treat him any different from before :( shes so sweettt :((

btw i like Shu's stress baking but who's gonna eat all those croissants-- Mika doesn't eat, is Shu living off croissants at this point? sounds funny jasdajs

jumping to the karaoke, imagine Mika saying "oh but i only know classical music :(" when its his turn to sing and everyone just go :0 and starts recommending a bunch of songs/genres to him (that's how mika and ritsu start bonding, im wrong?)

aNyways we got into worldbuilding with Rei's band, is the same Undead, right? would that make them relatively well known or karaokes can get any song like youtube? asking as someone that has no idea how karaokes works--

and every magical girl needs a vivid dream with some esoteric background, it's like a checklist lol

aNywaysx2, that's all i got to say for the chapter 5 akdjfas, and i answered all those pending asks from months ago! yay me! now i gotta answer two more about Nazuna's weapon cuz i've seen 3 teams until now and they all got their points jsdafhas (scissors/offensive+defensive, support like a staff or smth and healing) i'll see what i can do about that lmao

[snickeringdragon]

snick you need to tell me where ok ko wasted its potential and how you think it could be made better i havent seen anyone talk about this damn show in ages Yes im here because of skiddle's tags hi skiddle. hi snick

AHHAHAHAHAHAA. YOU HAVE NO IDEA. YOU HAVE NO IDEA

AHEM.

ok ko spoilers, obviously

...i should put this under a cut

opens up a powerpoint presentation. ok ko is in my opinion overall a very good show. its incredibly funny, charming, and...sometimes well written story wise. unfortunately it has a very very big failing in a very very big plot point

clicks to the next slide. my beautiful son tko.

tko himself is fine. i have no issues with his CHARACTER. i take issue with how his character is treated. tko is, by himself, a child with anger issues, he reacts very poorly to being agitated but like...

he has to be agitated first.

there is not a single example before season 3 where tko like, wrecks shit or whatever without being provoked, in his debut for example, hes just doing his job (albeit begrudgingly) before enid and rad provoke him, and he starts fighting them

however, the show always seems to act like tko is in the wrong, treats him like a villain despite his mostly heroic acts, is he PERFECT? no!! hes a fucking kid with anger issues!! he was locked inside a mind cage!! he doesnt know how to deal with things so he hits them!!! he just. happens to be able to hit things very very hard and with lightning bolts.

another example is the season 1 finale, youre in control. in yic tko. literally doesnt do anything wrong. like im not joking.

in yic tko gets let out to fight boxman jr and like...he does that. he throws boxman jr back to boxmore and then chases him over to boxmore. he does not attack a single hero in this episode. he does not do any damage to the plaza. the worst thing he does in this episode is put ko back in the cage. yet its STILL treated like hes doing something wrong???

another thing about tko. tko wants freedom. he says this outright. being locked inside a literal cage will do that to ya. i want to make sure real quick that we're on the same page here that locking a 6-11 year old boy inside a cage is bad no matter how badly he is at managing his anger issues right. right. okay. tko deserved to be uncaged. and he WAS. except...

when he gets out of the cage in youre in control. thats great and all but...his next appearance, tkos house, hes still upset. he still wants his freedom. its just that instead of being locked in a cage hes locked in a (pretty cool honestly) house. it doesnt matter how nice you make an enclosure, sometimes itll just never work for the animal. and thats what tko is like, he wants out, he wants control over the body, which like. is fucking fair?? im someone who REALLY understands the importance of going outside often, tko really deserves to be allowed outside their headspace. its good for you.

but tko DOESNT. GET THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he shows up. LITERALLY TWICE in season 2 (thats 40 episodes!) and NEITHER of his appearances (tkos house, dark plaza) does he even get to use the body on his own!! its always fused as pko!! he doesnt get a turn!!

and then when season three starts. uh. glances at tko rules. Yeah. The Subconscious. he gets trapped in a dark empty void for [checks notes] about two weeks. minimum.

what im getting at here. is that tko never really left that cage.

okay. im gonna touch on one more tko thing. the FUCKING finale. [furious]

quick recap, in the finale ko and tko have a plot twist moment where "oh hey! ko and tko are the same person actually! and now theyve accepted eachother as the same person and can be happy! hooray!" except like. mko (finale fusion) is just ko

like seriously hes JUST ko. his design? leaning towards kos features. his personality? LITERALLY just ko theres not a hint of tko there. its not the two of them "accepting eachother" or whatever its. its the writers killing off tko.

as well as like. a guy i know pointed this out and i cannot fucking get over it. if they were just going to ""fuse the two"" in the end then WHY. in GODS NAME. is tkos LITERAL FIRST LINE OF DIALOGUE.

"no, not ko."

hes so fucking INSISTENT on correcting people when they call him ko (which is ANOTHER gripe i have with this show. NOBODY calls him his name) and they just. oh yeah hes actually ko lol. LIKE DUDE. THIS ISNT HOW YOU WRITING.

i didnt even mention the issues regarding system stereotypes. i didnt even mention dark plaza since i was focusing on tko. i didnt even. theres so much. i need to stop. now. goodbye.

[sumu-samu]

(Broken) Trust

This was something I thought up from two comments on Geordi’s episode Your Boyfriend Finally Draws The Line. One said something about Cutie having a panic attack after Geordi left and another kinda piggybacked off that with saying how even if Cutie got the help, and Geordi forgave them that they would never forgive themselves and live in constant fear they would hurt him again. So… angst. 

Italics is things playing in Cuties head and the bold italics is what they were thinking in the moment of the fight 

CW: stereotypical/fictional display of a panic attack, argument, disassociation, mental distress, and severe angst. (Lmk if I missed anything)

multiple chapters

master list | part 2

Why are you like this

Of course I’m mad. Fuck you-

I’m asking you for 20 or 30 minutes. Why is that a problem?

That is not fair to me. Don’t say that.

Why are you like this

Do you know how hurtful it is

Fuck you-

Cutie just stood there, all of Geordi’s words swirling around in their head.

Sometimes I just want some space for myself

Don’t… DON’T

Why can’t my words ever be enough for you

Geordi was right, all they did was push and push and push. They were being so fucking toxic. 

Giving me space is not some gift you’re granting me. It’s… it’s a right that you’re respecting.

Don’t guilt me for asking for it

That is not fair to me

Don’t give it conditionally

You’re not really giving it at all

Subconsciously they knew that it would come to this, but they were to blind to see that the way they acted was bringing this end closer and sooner. 

It’s not easy for me to just not care

My feelings aren’t just some problem you can solve

Even if that would be convenient for you.

They think everything’s about them

Selfish, that’s what they were. They were too insecure to take Geordi’s feelings into account. They were too obsessed with what others were thinking about themselves to care that Geordi needed space.

It’s like you don’t even hear me

Because I’m tired. And you don’t seem to have much to say anyway. 

Are we too different

They don’t get it, they don’t get me

I have drawn a line, and they keep crossing it

Maybe trying isn’t enough

It wasn’t, trying wasn’t enough. Because regardless of how hard they tried it always ended up the same. 

I’m upset. But that doesn’t mean I want you gone.

I’m not mad, just tired

I want them in my life

 Did he? Did he still want them in his life? After all they had done.

They think back to the talk they had just had before he walked out.

Is the why really going to make a difference? I already know why you did it. The same reason you always do *he’s going to leave* because the thought of not knowing what someone thinks all the time pushes you to this place where you just- *loud, loud, mad. He’s mad. He should be. You fucked up* 

It was everything they were scared of but they couldn’t do that to Geordi. They couldn’t lie, they couldn’t hide it from him. They loved him. He understood how hard it was to be honest. Of course he did, he was Geordi, the best thing to ever have happened to them. 

Honesty after the fact… and then apology… aren’t going to be enough for me.. anymore *way to go dumbass. He’s gone, he hates you. He should. What’s wrong with you* because… because apologies are just words…. Words you keep on saying.

He was right. The amount of times they said sorry, you coulda filled a whole pool with it. 

I lost three years of myself, and my health, and my happiness to that. And I’m not gonna do that again *happiness, you don’t make him happy. Miserable, he’s miserable. How could you?* 

They never wanted to take his happiness away. To be compared to his ex. An ex they didn’t know much about but they knew was a piece of shit. 

I need to go. I’ll text you when I get there. Goodbye. 

And just like that, he walked out. And they were left there, alone, in silence, so so so much silence. They could feel their heart begin to speed up. Faster and faster, it felt like it would beat straight out of their chest. Their lungs moved with their heart, expanding and contracting faster and faster, their chest burned. They were already crying before Geordi walked out. Their legs gave out, Cutie fell to the ground right there in the kitchen. Chest heaving, mind racing, face flooded with salty tears. They began to shake, they couldn’t stop it. 

“G-G-Geordi” they wheezed. But no matter how hard they tried to call out, Geordi left, he was gone. He wouldn’t even care to come to their side to calm them down. 

They tried so hard to think of the next best person. But they couldn’t. All that ran through their head was Geordi and his words. 

They were able to find the strength to get their phone out and call the last person they texted. 

“Cutie! Hey! Wha-… Cutie?” They could hear the rapid breathing that came from Cutie. “What’s goin’ on? Are you okay? Where are you?” 

“Home… help… please” they struggled to get it out. 

[accirax]

Disventure Camp All Stars Power Ranking (Round 16)

Ah, the sweet sixteenth. At this crucial final 5 vote-out, will I be able to rein my theories in, or will I just be horsing around? With this few players left in the game, it's harder to distinguish between yay and nay.

In case you haven't seen my previous power rankings, the Power Ranking Format is essentially a way of ranking how well each player is doing in the game. So, in essence, this is a long form way of predicting who I think will be eliminated from the competition in the next episode. There will be spoilers for last week's episode (obviously) and its power ranking, so make sure to read that first if you don't want to be spoiled on how I ranked our last boot. If you want more clarification on the rules, that first post will help you out as well. Furthermore, I'm going to be spoiling the preview for next episode, so if you want to go in TOTALLY blind, save this for later. Let's go!

Recap - Alec's Elimination

Current Score: 70 acquired/103 total

(Points versus @venus-is-thinking: 21 acquired/29 total)

"But, I really feel like it has to be Riya's time to go. If it isn't, well... I hope the rest of my list holds up well enough."

Given that Riya didn't get eliminated last week, I'm happy to report that I did put the correct boot in my second best spot. Makes me feel a little better, after my Gabby and Aiden blunders. What I'm not happy to report is that one of my favorite characters this season (and in Season 1) is now out of the game. That's quite saddening. But, I'm not too upset about it.

In the entire pre-merge portion of the game, I knew as I was watching Alec absolutely slay that he was going to have a downfall eventually. Now, I didn't know that said downfall would involve a romantic entanglement with Riya and getting idoled out, but I also didn't know that he'd be able to repair and reflect more on his relationship with Connor, so, pros and cons! Or, rather, cons and pros. And he gets to be in the Loser's Motel episode with Fiore now, hehehe >:)c

While I wish he could have had a nicer exit for his sake, I understand that villains need to be "punished" in shows like these-- and, y'know, at least he wasn't blown up and exploded at age 6 with no support! (/j) Plus, he did get some closure in the form of coming to terms with why his relationships were failing, and having hope for moving on in the future. It was kinda bs that he lost that puzzle challenge because he needed to not be immune for plot reasons in this episode, though. The Alec I know could have smashed a twelve piece jigsaw in seconds. (/j)

Trailer Analysis

Trevor and Emily are back at it again. Are the interns also not allowed to use their phones, or is that just the campers? Just looking out for Trevor's future employment potential, especially in light of Kristal potentially quitting as host.

I guess Riya is worried about appearing in front of a camera now? Perhaps Connor proving how pathetic she had become might have had a more profound impact on her than I might have assessed.

Ooooooh, are we doing letters from home? That would be so interesting. It could also factor into Riya looking nervous in front of the camera-- if the message from her family isn't so supportive of her actions. ...It's a good thing Alec went home before this episode, if true.

The women's alliance is real after all! It wasn't just a myth created and spread by me!!!!

horse

While I absolutely feel for the riggers in this situation... good lord these horse rigs are rough. Their legs just do not move as much/in the right way as they should. I wish the animators retroactive luck in animating this challenge. Also, Riya is the only one who seems to really be struggling with the horses in the preview.

Grett's entering her challenge beast era.

Who the fuck is throwing sticks at Jake? Is it Ally, or is it part of the challenge?

"Final three, let's go~!"

See, told you the women's alliance is real. This is definitely from the same scene we saw earlier of Grett, Riya, and Ally standing around. The real question is just whether or not this will remain as the plan for even this episode anymore.

Power Ranking

#1: Ally

Look, I know I keep putting Ally way above where Venus has her, but... well, it's worked out for me so far, hasn't it? At this point, my vibe check honestly says that Ally is more likely to be a finalist than not (and not just because everyone theoretically has a 60% chance of finalist at this point), even if I can't pinpoint exactly how she's going to get there. I'm sure part of the reason why is because Seasons 1 and 2 treated the Final 4 very differently-- Season 2 had a vote-out with idols fully permitted, while Season 1 had half of their competitors have immunity and choose between the two losers. But, I digress. This is about the Final 5.

The main reason why I think Ally will survive is because she has Grett's favor. I think that Grett will be looking to protect Ally this episode, even if the favor doesn't work the other way. Jake may very obviously want to gun for Ally, but Grett knows that she (and Ally) are the swing votes. Grett will want to take out Riya instead, and if Jake and Connor refuse to comply, she can always eliminate whichever one of them may not have immunity alongside Riya. And, if Grett chooses to work with Riya/the women's alliance in the first place, then Ally is totally fine, too!

The only way I see Ally going home is if Grett decides to abandon her, which I don't think is going to happen. As I see it, Grett currently views Ally as a pawn, and while that may cause Ally to rebel in the future, Grett doesn't seem too concerned by that at the moment.

To be clear, I really hate putting anyone anywhere near the top, because I do think that everyone has a genuinely good reason to be eliminated at this point. It's easy for that to be the case when there are so few competitors left. However, I think Ally has the least reason to go home at this point, so I feel most comfortable with her in the #1 position.

#2: Jake

Not going to lie, pretty much every reason why I don't think Jake is going home this episode is a meta one. If Grett and Ally decided to ride the women's alliance to the end, and if Jake doesn't have immunity, there is a high likelihood he could just die. They voted for him last time. Why not do it again?

That being said, there are a lot of meta reasons why Jake would stay in the game.

Under the assumption that the writers would plan for a mix of Season 1 and Season 2 characters in the finale, and for at least one man to make the finale (as they've already had an all-women Final 3), if Jake goes home, Grett has to be in the finale as the only other Season 1 remaining, and Connor has to be in the finale as the only other man remaining. It's a lot simpler if Jake just makes the finale.

On top of that, Jake's character arc just seems like it's been leaning winner as well. I won't explain all the reasons why, because that would take a long time, and I've been mentioning it in my Power Rankings and initial thoughts for a while now.

While their relationship does have nuance, overall, I think we're supposed to root for Jake and against Ally in their rivalry. Thus, I don't think that they'd want to let Ally actually eliminate Jake. He's a fan favorite, while Ally seems to draw in new haters with each episode.

Jake was already eliminated at Final 5 after being saved by an idol at Final 6 once before. I doubt they'd want him to get eliminated in the exact same way again.

There might be even more, but I'm not thinking of them right now. At any rate, all of those meta elements combined gives Jake enough power to survive being put at a lower placement for this round, at least. Whatever happens in this challenge, I think they'll find some way to save him, whether it's giving Jake immunity, Grett deciding to work with Connor and Jake, the girls deciding to target Connor this time, or whatever else. Still, though. It's scary having him this high.

#3: Connor

Once again, a character conveniently lands in the middle of the ranking because I think they have good reasons to stay or go. Or, at least, I think that's happened before? Possibly even with Connor. Kinda scary that that point is third place, though.

So, why would it make sense for Connor to stay in the competition? Well, like I said with Jake, I think that there'll be at least one man in the finale, so if Connor goes home, it would make it "pretty obvious" that Jake is locked in for the finals. He also still hasn't yet outplaced Riya in this season (or at all), which is something I've been predicting will happen for a while. I also think that Connor would make a very sensible last place finalist, as someone who we can root for but understandably get rid of (because he's already rich) in going from Final 3 to Final 2, opening the stage for a more dramatic showdown between Final 2 rivals. Uh, to be clear, at this point, I'm expecting a Jake/Ally/Connor Final 3 with placements in that order. I didn't really set out to put the three of them in the top 3 positions of this week, but, I guess my internal biases got the best of me?

Screw all that, though-- why would it then make sense for Connor to be the one going home? Well, even though he hasn't been there to see Riya voted out, the end of last episode and this trailer have made it pretty clear that he's already had a moral victory against Riya. Honestly, that might sting for Riya even more-- even though Connor didn't even outplace her, he still seems more content than she is. Why?! Eliminating Connor here could also create a very dramatic do-or-die scenario for Jake at the Final 4. If Jake then wins immunity to secure his spot in the Final 4, it could also lead to some intriguing drama at the Final 4 tribal. I'd love to see Riya going out in that fashion: voting out Connor actually leads to her downfall, as it exposes that her social game wasn't strong enough to save her at the eleventh hour.

Also, if Connor and Alec still need a final conversation at the Loser's Motel, Connor would need to be... well, in the Loser's Motel. To be honest, though, I could actually see the fact that Alec and Connor hugged it out already as being a good sign for the fact that Connor doesn't need to be in the Loser's Motel episode. For that reason and the ones listed above, I think Connor is decently safe... but even decently safe will land you in spot #3.

#4: Grett

After Ally started to sneakily pick up what Grett was discreetly attempting to put down last episode, Grett's life in this game definitely started to flash before my eyes. At this point, it seems to me like Grett is being set up for a pre-finale downfall. However, I think we might still need a little bit more time for Grett's threat level to rise enough for her to truly feel like a final boss archetype.

To quickly explain what I mean by that, modern Survivor (at least) has very frequently edited the show in a way that makes the Final 4 or 5 boot into a final boss that the true winner of the season has to defeat before rightfully claiming their crown in the finale. This is because, a lot of the time, the best strategic players of the season make it really deep into the game, but are such obvious threats to win that the rest of the players scramble to take them out before it's too late. If you've seen Survivor 42, 43, or 44, some names might jump to mind. I don't know if the ONC writers might have been trying to specifically emulate that phenomenon with Grett or if it's just something that could occur naturally, but either way, I think she may receive that treatment.

Part of it is just that I think she's decently likely to win immunity this episode. We've heard that Grett enjoys working out and being athletic in these past few episodes, and she seemed to be kicking ass on that horse. She also has a rich(?) background, so she might have more inherent knowledge of horses than some of the other competitors.

There's more I could specifically say about what I think might happen in these last few episodes involving Grett, but I'll save that for #5. But, if I'm so convinced that Grett will be safe this episode, why put her at #4?

Well, truthfully, I'm not. First of all, I said the final boss can be eliminated at 4th or 5th place, and this is 5th place. Granted, I think 5th place final boss is more warranted for Survivor, with their Final 4 firemaking twist, but it could still be the case here. I could also see Ally convincing everyone else that Grett is too threatening, and everyone working together to vote her out of the game. Even if Jake would hate to work with Ally, I don't know if anyone would be able to pass up such an obvious "as long as it isn't me" opportunity this close to the finale.

While I do still think Grett would be a deserving winner, she's entered into wide enough of a danger zone that I fear she won't make it to the finale. The debate in my eyes is whether it'll be this episode or the next that takes her out. I'm leaning next episode, but I'm unconfident enough in my prediction that Grett goes at #4.

#5: Riya

Alright, back to my direct predictions about what will happen. As long as Riya doesn't win immunity this episode, I think that what will happen is that Grett will decide to turn the tables this time, and plan to vote with Jake and Connor to take out Riya. That way, she can fulfill her personal vendetta against Riya, as well as prevent someone who almost won last season from getting a chance at a re-do.

Given that Grett is locked in with Connor and Jake as Riya votes, there isn't really much of a point to voting for someone else if Ally is in on the plan. But, that doesn't mean that Ally won't be mad about it. The line where Ally seems so happy about going to the Final 3 with Riya and Grett would factor into this. I think Ally might genuinely believe that that's the plan moving forward, before Grett goes "lol no of course we're taking Riya out this time." At that point, Ally will put two and two together, and be confident that Grett tipped Connor and Jake off about the idol play without telling her. Some super close ally she is!

Going into the Final 4, Ally will be sick and tired of Grett bossing her around, not taking her opinions into account when it comes to who to vote out (Jake still isn't out of the game!) and treating her as essentially a second vote. That rage will cause Ally to somehow get Grett out at the Final 4-- possibly in combination with a Jake immunity win or some other situation where Jake is immune from being voted out. Or, maybe Ally would put her hatred of Jake aside in seeing Grett as a bigger threat. Doubtful, though-- she really fucking hates Jake.

Anyways, I feel bad that I haven't actually talked about Riya much in this Riya section. Of course, I don't know if anything that I'm going to say about Riya will make me feel any nicer. I really don't think that Riya is going to be a finalist again. I think that Grett or Ally make more sense as a "villain" finalist for the series, between Grett being a former member of the villains' alliance and Ally being one of the most detestable characters at this point. (Not saying I personally detest her.) If Riya isn't a finalist, it's now or next episode.

And... really, the thing that makes me want to put Riya on the bottom this week the most is wondering what the hell she would be doing still in the Final 4. If she gets there, it's probably either a Connor or Jake boot that gets us there, possibly Grett in the "Ally convinces everyone to vote Grett" scenario. What does that get us?

If Connor is eliminated, Riya is just an awkward third wheel on the Ally/Jake and Ally/Grett scenarios.

If Jake is eliminated, I guess she continues beefing with Connor, but about what? Whatever they have to talk about will probably be talked about in this episode.

If Grett is eliminated, then... I mean, I guess we'll focus in on her and Ally? And she can keep beefing with Connor about whatever. I don't know about you guys, but to me, that feels... kind of fruitless?

The main issue is that, at least in my eyes, Riya has already lost. She's not going to win this season, and everyone in the audience knows it. With Alec's elimination, she lost any sort of power she could have had. She doesn't have Alec to order around, she's officially made a fool of herself in front of Connor, and she doesn't even seem to enjoy the presence of the cameras she's always loved in the trailer. I think Riya may kinda quietly go off into the night this episode, which is the saddest (/pos) method for eliminating her there is. TV's greatest villain, taken out by Grett as an obvious move with very little fanfare. Is this where her relentless ambition and manipulation has gotten her...?

Oh, and she still needs to talk with Alec in the Loser's Motel, probably. Kinda fitting if they're eliminated back-to-back, as well.

As we close out this Power Ranking, let me reiterate that I genuinely could see any of these competitors being eliminated this episode. I wound up having stronger opinions about Ally and Riya than I thought, but I really struggled with where to place everyone at the start. I don't want to get 1 point this week, but I wouldn't be all too surprised if I do. I just have to hope that the power of the horse is on my side.

... wait, Venus was born in the year of the horse! Dammit, I'm totally gonna lose! Unless we have the same person at #5...? As I write this, I haven't read hers yet, so I guess I'll have to wait and see. To the episode!

[divorcingjimmatthews]

season 2 finale thoughts (spoilers!!)

JADE

OK so first things first—i love him sm T_T seeing julie in danger really affected him and he went into the fucking tunnels for her ??? NO ONE is allowed to call this guy selfish anymore okay. now that being said

that's NOT tom!!!! and that's not abby!!!! and that wasn't khatri!!!!!! i hope the small "conversation" (boyd left him on read lmao) on the porch is the start of some jade and boyd plot thread for s3 because they need to talk about this. i wonder if more people will start seeing dead people in s3? i wonder if jade will see tobey...

anyway those visions are clearly trying to manipulate them. the khatri and tom ones alone could pass as neutral but the abby one this episode? hell no!! the vision was trying to convince boyd that the kind thing to do was to let them die 💀💀💀 i wonder if this is also what christopher saw?

and wtf was up with the angkhooey kids! the fuck were they doing in the tunnels! tabitha already saw one of them down there at the beginning of the season but it's really interesting that jade saw the same thing tabitha saw... that's definitely new! he also confirmed that his visions were showing him real things when he touched the ventriloquist doll... which we already knew, but what does that say about the soldiers? all the stuff about the stories... much to think about there 🤔

anyway. enough praise and lore now it's time to scold yes SCOLD this man for going down there ALONE !!! helloooo visions people you should not be going places on your own that's like seeing things 101 i should know about that. final thought: hilarious how jade spends time with tabby and is now seeing the kids, spends 5 minutes with boyd and is now seeing dead people... he keeps catching stuff, he's an empath fr

TABITHA

ok let me start by saying i think this is possibly the best direction they could've gone with the character development on the show. the GAPING HOLE that tabby's absence is going to leave???? for her children and most importantly for jim since he's lately been making an enemy of pretty much everyone else? she's the only one that's really gotten through both victor and jade too... her going missing is going to be so fucking palpable

i posted a theory that jade might be getting out of fromville in the finale right after watching ep9 because i figured that if someone had the resources to do anything from the outside it would be jade with his money and access to tech, but i guess my love for jade was just blinding me because this makes a lot more narrative sense

i've been seeing people speculate that tabitha is going to find eloise and i'm suscribing to that. she's got the lunchbox to prove she knew victor in case eloise lost her memory or something—but i have no idea how the two of them might be able to do anything. it's not gonna be easy

we can't even jump to the conclusion that eloise actually made it out. i think she did make it to the tower (victor's mom probably got her in the tree before the creatures got her) but the glass wasn't broken before the biw pushed tabby so i see no proof that anyone else walked the same steps all the way through before her

i can't stress this enough btw i need —need— jim and jade to become friends like jim's gonna have no choice but to lean on people outside of his family now and his recent antics got a lot of people pretty upset. jim and jade have a lot in common including caring for tabby so i can see them teaming up to look for her at the very least. jim's gonna have to accept victor now whether he likes it or not and thank god for mama liu because without her i think all three of these men would be fucked and i mean it. can they even cook i don't think so

i could talk about these dynamics literally forever (and i will) but now its time to move on to the next

REGGIE

ngl i kind of get him like no one was treating him like they would've treated a main character after such a devastating event i can kind of see why he snapped all things considered. he was right to blame boyd too but look at least boyd was trying, boyd taking on his gambles is what got them the talismans and what got a nightmare creature dead, he's one fucking man okay give him a break

i was TERRIFIED during the wedding scene it was so beautiful (the vows really got to me) but i kept expecting gunshots to interrupt it like i legit thought reggie was gonna somehow manage to kill everyone downstairs or a bunch of people at least. thank GOD he was dumb enough to go for boyd first that's like going straight for the boss in a videogame

also whats with the throat slicing in this show istg everyone here dies of a sliced throat lmaooo is it really that easy to kill someone or to get killed? unsettling. i'm gonna start wearing a neck brace everywhere. they should sell plate armor chokers i'd get one

FINAL THOUGHTS

(EDIT: deleting the bit i wrote on kenny and kristi because regardless of how i feel about their situation as a sapphic woman i don't want to add to the anti-mari/kristi hate going around rn. i want to make it clear that i love both kristi and marielle individually and as a couple and nothing i say about the kenny/kristi situation is meant to imply that kristi should not be prioritizing marielle. this is a serious topic and i'm really sorry that i've been shitposting about it carelessly as if the larger context didn't matter when it does <\3)

[alaffy]

Only Murders in the Building, Ep.3x06 – Ghost Light  (Spoilers)

This episode had less to do with advancing the mystery, than it did getting the characters where they needed to be for the final four episodes.  Still, there were a couple of revelations and a few important things to note. 

The episode begins the day after the previous episode.  Howards comes to Mabel’s apartment and confesses to killing Ben.  However, when Charles and Oliver arrive, we find out that Howard believes he’s responsible for Ben’s death as he didn’t sweep the ghost of a dead actor away.  He says it was because the broom was in K.T.’s office and the office had been locked.  The reason why Howard is telling them now is because Howard saw the ghost in the theater that morning. 

Charles and Oliver learn that Tobert spent the night at Mabel’s and knows of the murder board.  They aren’t happy with him investigating with Mabel.  Well, Charles is upset because Joy has left him and he’s insecure about another relationship ending.  Oliver is upset because he’s afraid that Loretta might have killed Ben (he saw her handwriting and there’s a chance it matches the writing on the mirror).  The three of them decide to go with Howard to the theater.

At the theater, Charles is almost hit twice by falling sandbags; making it look like the ghost is real (as that is how the actor who became the ghost died).  They go to K.T.’s office, which makes her jump.  K.T. mentions how this screwed up her highlights on a script page.  And then we get very close shot of K.T.’s page highlighted in green and orange being shredded by a paper shredder.

They tell K.T. about the sandbags.  She and Howard go to check the stage.  The rest of their story is about how to deal with the ghost, so I won’t go much further with them.  However, K.T. mentions that if her office was locked the night of Ben’s murder, she wasn’t the one who did it.  So, given this information and the detailed shot of the script going into the shredder, something clearly happened in K.T.’s office that night.

Meanwhile, Mabel notices a sign in sheet on K.T.’s wall.  Mabel says they can use that to compare the handwriting on the mirror.  Oliver quickly grabs the sheet and, as Mabel and Charles discuss Charles clearly having an issue processing his breakup, Oliver sneaks away.  Mabel and Charles get into a bit a fight and go their separate ways.  Charles will soon find himself locked in a closet, where he will spiral about his insecurities about people leaving him.  It's a couple of funny moments, but not much more than that. Skip.

Mabel, meanwhile, discovers that Tobert has come to the theater.  It turns out he’s following Johnathan.  Not surprisingly, we find out quickly that the reason why Johnathan was talking to Ben’s “doctor,” was to get the same kind of “medicine” that Ben was using to perform.  It turns out that Johnathan has high anxiety because he’s now the lead man and he hasn’t said anything because, well, he’s kind of doing this for Howard.  It also means that the theory that he killed Ben to get the lead doesn’t make sense. 

Oliver, meanwhile, is trying to see if the handwriting on the mirror does match Loretta’s.  It’s a bit inconclusive.  Oliver hears a noise and, when he goes to investigate, finds a hidden area.  There, he finds that an old friend of his happens to be living in this space.  Furthermore, it sounds like this director had been working at the theater until he was fired by K.T.  (if I understood that correctly).  Oliver admits to his friend that he had fallen in love with Loretta and was concerned that she may have killed Ben.  Oliver’s friend mentions that Loretta has a temper.  Oliver asked what he means and Oliver’s friend tells him about the fight that Loretta and Ben had.  The friend says that Ben and Loretta were rehearsing, and Loretta got upset when Ben took a joke too far.  Apparently, that’s when she called Ben a “fucking pig.”  He then tells Oliver how Charles hit Ben.  Now, it should be pointed out that this friend is a bit of an unreliable witness as he couldn’t hear everything in the conversation and because he’s a bit…mentally unwell.

Afterwards, Oliver’s friend gives Oliver some advice that Oliver had given him years ago about how indecision is the worst thing and…look, Oliver, considering where your friend is now maybe we don’t listen to his advice.  However, Oliver does and this leads to him wiping the lipstick message off the mirror.  It’s at this moment, Charles and Mabel come into the dressing room.

And, I’m sorry, but I don’t really like Oliver at the moment.  I get he doesn’t want to loose Loretta, but he says some really horrible things to Mabel and Charles.  Anyway, this leads to a big fight between the three.  Oliver tells Mabel about how Charles didn’t tell her that he had hit Ben.  Charles tells Oliver that was because he wanted to protect Oliver, but after the way Oliver is acting he’s going to quit the musical.  Mabel is upset with Oliver because he’s being an ass and at Charles as he hid information.  And she also has a valid point, a man is dead.  While Charles and Oliver both have personal issues going on that do need to be recognized and dealt with, it shouldn’t be overshadowing the fact that a man was murdered.  Mabel also lets them know the Cinda had told her that Mabel needed to find another team who wasn’t so busy with other projects. 

So, at the end of the episode, the three have separated and Mabel is now working with Tolbert; which, and I may be paranoid here, why wouldn’t I be shocked if Tolbert and Cinda know each other.

As for Ben’s murder, I still don’t think it’s Loretta.  Maybe.  But there’s something we’re missing and I think Charles has the answer.  Going back to the fight between Loretta and Ben, rather going back to Charles’ reaction to that fight…something has happened before this.  It doesn’t make sense that Charles, if this had been the first time he’d seen them fight, would have just hit Ben.  Like Charles doesn’t ask what’s going on, he just tells Ben to get away from her. And the fact that he warns Ben later to stay away from Loretta…there is something else Charles has seen. 

But then we also have a couple of other interesting questions that come from this episode.  One, obviously, what was going on in K.T.’s office.  The other comes from what Johnathan said about Ben’s drug use.  Mabel mentions that, if Ben took those drugs before the performance, there should have been traces of meth in the toxicology report, from when Ben was killed the first time, but there wasn’t.  Is it possible that the poison was in the drugs?  I have a feeling the answer will be no as I feel like the drugs are another red herring. Like I really wouldn't be surprised if we find out that doctor had been telling them he's been giving them these drugs, when it all is a placebo.

And I still am convinced Ben was professing his love to cookies.