#or saying someone has ADHD because they got distracted by something

[wallabywhump]

Post Episode 8x08 CODA/Continuation

Content: Light angst, Buck spiralling, Buck's abandonment issues/running thoughts/(has ADHD), BuckTommy hints at the end.

Word Count: 1,965

Started writing this when the episode ended, please enjoy!

---

The sign goes out front of Eddie's house two weeks later, Buck helps to dig the hole. Buck helps talk to the realtor. Buck talks Eddie down from a three-bed home with an attic office in a HOA suburb and helps him find a respectably sized two bed that will leave him with money to renovate the bathroom and add a ramp up to the door.

Buck bakes a million cookies and eats them while Eddie has meetings with realtors. He sets out sweet breads and muffins when Eddie has an open house, and he happily serves them to people, "yes, there is a gluten free option! I was playing around with xanthan gum, so it shouldn't- oh, you're too kind."

All through it all, Buck focuses on Eddie, and he tries to ignore the ball of panic that's growing and growing and growing, as Eddie calls his mom and dad, and talks to Chris, and they're discussing going to view the home together and-

"I'll be there in two days, buddy!" Eddie says to Chris, a smile wide on his face while he put the autographed picture of the Hotshots cast into a wallet to keep it safe. "I can't wait to see you; we can talk without it lagging."

Buck takes a deep breath.

"Buck's not coming, LA won't survive if we both are off work."

Buck takes the butter off the heat, starts mixing in the sugar.

"I was talking it over with Grandpa, and we can go to the aquarium while I'm there. I'll even get to cheer you on in your chess match."

Chris groans. "You don't cheer during chess matches, dad, you have to be quiet."

Eddie laughs, and Buck needs to savor that sound. Needs to bottle up the sound of his best friend, and the kid he loves to the moon and back, teasing each other because he doesn't know how long he'll have this for. "Well, okay, you'll just have to teach me what to do, Mijo. I've never been to a chess match before."

The flour comes out of the microwave and Buck mixes that in, the soothing fold-fold-fold making his raging heart beat easier to ignore.

"You've never played chess before," Chris teases.

Buck spares a glance at Eddie, and he's fondly smiling at the tablet, and he says, "Well, you'll have to teach that too. Need to understand how you're winning, kid."

Buck is trying his best to be happy for Eddie, desperately putting his issues to the side, he hasn't even mentioned Tommy with all the baking he's been doing.

Eddie, graciously, hasn't mentioned how Buck has gone back to how he was the exact week after Tommy dumped him.

Or perhaps Eddie hasn't noticed with all the preparation and the legal jargon and clearing out everything to make the house look pretty for viewings, and Buck-

Buck really wants to talk to someone.

Eddie's leaving, Bobby is busy building a house, Hen, Maddie, Chimney-

Everyone's moving forward towards something happier. And Buck's stuck trying not to tie his best friend to a city with his sad puppy dog eyes and a pout, all while missing his ex so much that focusing on Eddie leaving drowns out that pain and fills it with something different.

"Buck?"

Buck jumps, dropping his spatula into the bowl. "Huh? W-What's-"

"Chris hung up, he's got school tomorrow."

Buck picks his spatula up, continues mixing his cookie dough. It's as he folds a third time that he notices he forgot the chocolate chips.

"More cookies?"

Buck forces a smile on his face, ignores the floundering puttering in his heart that tells him he needs to call someone before this becomes unsustainable. Baking isn't distracting him, it's not-

He wants Eddie to stay, he wants Chris to come home, he wants a barbecue in Bobby's backyard with his family-

He wants to call Tommy.

"It's for the viewing tomorrow," Buck says, proud of how even his voice sounds, how it doesn't even sound like a lie.

Eddie sidles up to the counter, looking into the bowl. "You don't have to try buttering up potential buyers with sugary goods. I know you set a precedent for the first one, but I don't want you to feel like you have to."

Buck puts the bowl and spatula down and bumps his hip into Eddie's as he starts greasing up the pan. "If I sweeten them up, maybe they'll actually buy, and you can leave quicker."

The free-sounding tease is easy, it's easy to fake, it's been easy to fake since that day he picked up the tablet and saw the houses. It's been easy to fake since Tommy dumped him, and he had to crawl out of his home and go to work and look somewhat put together, so no-one was scared on their calls. It's been easy to fake since Abby left him at the airport, and with a home that wasn't quite his, and an uneasy feeling in his heart that she wasn't coming back. It's been easy to fake since he was sixteen years old, and Maddie was leaving and-

Maddie, Abby, Tommy, Eddie.

People leave, and that's okay, and it's selfish to force them to stay. No matter how much he wished they would choose to stay.

Buck scoops out a glob of dough and drops it onto his pan.

Eddie rolls his eyes. "Okay, bud, I'm gonna have a beer while you finish with...that."

Buck sets up the mixer to bake a cake after he puts the cookies in the oven.

---

Buck drops Eddie off at the airport and spirals.

The goodbye wave feels robotic, despite knowing that Eddie will be back in a week, even if it's just to start packing up his life to move it hours away. His phone sits in the dock on the dash, and Buck-

Buck doesn't have anything to distract himself from the yawning emptiness inside him.

Nothing to put his mind to, nothing to focus on, just a whole lot of nothing.

The nothing that has been eating away at every positive thought and coping skill he'd put into trying to ignore how much he missed Tommy. The way Tommy would rub his arm and pull him in for a hug when he was feeling low. How Tommy would sarcastically tease him when his anxiety spiked, until Buck couldn't even remember he'd been anxious. How they could sit in silence and not have to chat, and it was just peaceful, and it put Buck at ease, and Tommy wouldn't even mention when Buck's leg started tapping, he'd just put a hand on Buck's knee and lean his weight into-

Fuck.

Tommy would have been a rock through this, platitudes about Eddie not being dead, stop panicking. "I can fly a helicopter, babe, just say the word and you can visit."

Except, Tommy isn't his rock anymore. He's a hurricane that has Buck unmoored and swirling in an abyss of panic and loneliness and, fuck, shit, fuck, Buck has to talk to someone. Or bake something. Or go to the middle of nowhere, with no reception, and scream at the sky.

Everyone's busy. Eddie's on a plane. No-one...he has-

"Buck?"

Buck jolts, staring down at the phone now in his hand, Tommy's face filling the screen, his nose scrunched and looking confused, concerned and cold all in one expression.

So closed off.

"I-I didn't mean to call," Buck whispers, his voice weak and thready even to his own ears. "Hi. Uh, I'll just, uh, hang up."

Except Buck doesn't, he stares at Tommy and feels his heart stutter.

Tommy raises an eyebrow, and Buck watches the cold melt off Tommy's face, leaving only confusion and concern.

"What's happening, Buck?"

"I...just dropped Eddie off at the airport, and I'm sitting at the drop off spot in the taxi ranks, and-"

Tommy's confusion disappears, and his eyes soften, and he's openly concerned and it's like a knife in Buck's chest.

Buck lets out a hoarse laugh. "I've held it in for weeks, not calling, and my best friend leaves and it's like I can't help it- Jesus." Buck runs a hand down his face, he feels like a mess.

"Why did you call me, Buck?"

Because it was habit for six months straight, because every time Buck's been sad since the breakup he's had to physically remove himself from his phone to stop himself from calling Tommy, because Buck just wants to have Tommy as his, and he can't seem to move on despite everyone else seeming able to.

"Everyone else...is moving forward, making families and living their lives, but I'm-"

Buck should hang up, forget about this, say 'sorry, bye asshole', and block Tommy's number once and for all.

Except-

"I'm stuck, stuck on that day in my loft, wondering what happened and how that occurred, and all I've wanted since the day it happened was to call you and fix it or-or, I don't know...I just feel so incomplete here. Unsatisfied. Nothing-nothing makes sense."

Buck rolls on.

"And Eddie told me not to call, so I didn't, except then Eddie decided he wanted to move to Texas and I couldn't be selfish and ask him to stay, so instead I've been helping him, helping him leave my life, because then at least I helped control it."

Buck chokes up.

"Because he's an adult with different priorities, and he can make his own decisions and it's my job as a friend to support him, and I guess you'd know that too if you still talked to him, or hey, maybe he would have stayed for you." He's fucking it up, finally got Tommy on the phone and rather than giving Tommy all the reasons they could work, and he should stay, he's dumping all his fears about Eddie leaving. "And I- I'm not making sense, I'm all over the place, this is not what I wanted to say at all, I had a whole speech about how I love you, and I deserved better, and-"

"Are you safe to drive?" Tommy asks, his voice cutting through Buck's monologue.

Buck bites his lip and nods his head. Of course, Tommy doesn't want to hear about his problems, they're broken up.

"Yeah, yeah, I..." Buck sniffs, wipes at his face despite it being dry, and forces a smile on his face. "I'm just a little sad, sorry for calling."

Tommy shakes his head, and he looks like he's in physical pain, and God, Buck feels like an asshole. He's so selfish, and he should have just thrown his phone out and got a new number after the breakup if he knew he was just going to trample over boundaries.

"No, don't be s- I mean, okay, okay. This sounds like- Eddie left? No, this is a conversation for in person," Tommy sounds just as confused and lost as Buck, which isn't nice, because Buck expects Tommy to be a rock, to be steady, to be- well, that went out the window the night they broke up.

"In person?" Buck wonders aloud.

Tommy hums, and his nose scrunches up, and he puts a finger to the bridge of his nose. The video feed is shaking like the phone in his hand is shaking. Buck swallows and waits for whatever emotional turmoil Tommy is experiencing to pass.

"Drive yourself to mine," Tommy orders.

Buck stares at the screen in shock. "W-What? Tommy, I- no, I-" A taxi starts honking their horn behind him.

"Mine," Tommy repeats, sure, and despite everything it makes that emptiness in Buck feel a little smaller, like Tommy is filling it with just the promise of a conversation. "Sounds like you need to get going. See you soon, Evan."

Tommy hangs up, and Buck spirals, but he starts the car anyway and drives to Tommy's with a spark of something in his chest.

[angelicgarnet]

the way people online talk about autism is getting really weird, like do they know that neurotypicals still have interests? that someone being passionate about a hobby doesn't mean they're autistic? you guys know that right

[antimony-medusa]

Someone asked me for notes on writing technoblade so:

this is how I do characterization, just in random order.

deadpan or "dry" but not monotone— he's often quite expressive just in a deadpan way.

FUNNY. Humour is hard though so you can skate by on just being sarcastic and deadpan.

Sarcastic.

doesn't often say that someone is important to him in words, not in a literal fashion— the reason why things like "for you the world" or "my best friend" or "bro" or "good friend and disciple" gets celebrated is because he wouldn't say that sort of thing often. He is not out here calling people sunshine. Techno's out here saying "oh I'm not endeared" and "there's a RACCOON in my basement" and "that's what I'd expect from you, old man", but at the same time in actions he's very clearly showing that he cares— fight alongside someone, give them gifts, invite them to stay. Complaining about being woken up and how he needs his beauty sleep and how he's gonna wither to ashes while he makes you supper and won't let you apologize and sets up the guest room for you. And then says of course he's doing it he values this friendship. and then tells you how you could make anything you want for breakfast don't wake him before ten or he'll crumble to dust

especially with phil, very rarely MEAN/cutting, even while bantering and complaining— he'll call him an old man who's fallen off but he won't make fun of how he talks or call him stupid or a burden or tell him to shut up. He will tell tommy to stop talking but that would be because tommy was yelling his opinions at people like a grackle

anxiety— he wins fights because he overprepares. the beginning of every stream is so much brewing and armour and grinding. The world is dangerous and the only way to face it is to Git Gud. HE WILL BE GRINDING.

loves animals.

general-purpose nerd. people boil this down to english-major a lot, but things I have heard technoblade go on tangents about include math, psychology, greek mythology, metaphor, and How To Balance The Game

canonically into golf? I don't use that but yeah.

it's fair if I can grind the game sufficiently to make it work. will use exploits and edge cases and also expects them to be used against him cause that's just the game we're playing, right?

dark humour. this is a guy who made jokes about his execution and then his cancer. If he is in peril or something terrible is happening he will be joking about it. Most of the time however that is very carefully dark humour that is about, in the metaphor, him on the gallows, not being part of the crowd at a public execution.

Neurodivergent. This Man Has ADHD. in-game he had the zoomies a lot, he jumped conversational topics, he got distracted and missed stuff.

socially uncomfortable but has social skills— you see the discomfort especially on places like SMPearth or when he's not in a highly scripted lore call. He'll be falling back on silence or falling out of the conversation unless he's comfortable with people, and then you see WAY more of the fast joking, on a sliding scale of how comfortable he was with people. You can absolutely tell if he's comfortable with people and it correlates to how much company manners he's putting on. Like he'll make the effort socially, but you can tell he's plotting his escape from this conversation most of the time on SMPearth unless with his allies.

you can get an incredibly long way with dropping your gs, "bruh", and deadpan sarcasm.

kinda guy to use "wanna" and "soporific" in the same sentence. Big vocabulary, informal mode of speaking unless he's giving a prepared speech.

On SMPearth jokes about world conquest and domination, on DSMP jokes about being the bad guy/withers/terrorism, on origins jokes about cancer.

Will talk himself up as the best and powerful while also in a way that implies he doesn't really believe that or think it's important. First Try, Chat, he'll say, while very clearly and obviously going for the sixth try. Didn't even sweat, while a moment ago he was audibly panicking down the mic. Kinda guy to talk about his enormous clout and then turn the conversation around to how Ranboo has higher viewership and he personally has fallen off and is dying and being flattened— not in a complaining way, but in a "you're doing so awesome you beat me so good great game" way.

does not swear while on stream. We know he swore off-stream but those clips are few and far between. You will get people twitch if you have techno swearing though.

I've run out of thoughts, does anyone else have more ideas for Techno characterization?

[thekeeperof-thefandoms]

Hazbin Hotel characters react to your stims

(I'm doing my personal favorite characters, so if there are others you wanna see, ask me. They may also be slightly OOC.)

Vox

You can't convince me this man doesn't also have ADHD. He's just spent decades masking it, as well as most of himself, to present a perfect image. Probably heard the term as it got more well known but didn't really connect the dots until meeting you.

He fidgets a lot, tapping his claws, bouncing his legs, can't sit in a fucking chair properly.

Doesn't realize he's overstimulated and burnt out from multi tasking dozens of screens until you point it out.

Once he's aware of it you help him manage his work better so he can be less stimulated and tense. You buy him proper fidget toys to mess with and he makes himself some top of the line bass boosted sound canceling headphones. He gives you a pair, too. When you're both alone, you look up songs with loaded bass in 8d just to watch each other twitch and involuntarily move your head with the sound.

That's about the extent of the conscious level of unmasking he'll do though. He gets self conscious.

But, he adores the fact you're comfortable enough to stim around him. Or in public. He can and will violently end people for even giving you dirty looks for stimming in public.

If you show excitement and joy over being around someone through happy noms he will literally get heart eyes. Just be careful where you bite him because it may lead to something else.

He's happy to let you stim, which means tricking him into doing it more.

He remembers and sub consciously absorbs your echolalias or any word replacements you use. If you do a lot of call and response vocals he learns them. (Call and response is basically when you memorize a sound with two people. One calls the other responds. You can just say both parts yourself ((I do)) but it's more satisfying with someone else).

If you do happy flappies this man will short circuit. (He will laugh if you accidentally smack yourself though).

If you squeal and kick you may give him a heart attack. He thought you were hurt or something. He gets used to it eventually but it still startles him.

Vox is also a chatter box so you two can info dump about special interests to each other for hours. Neither one of you expects the other to remember details, but the fact you don't tell each other to shut up and are content to do your own thing while listening to your partner/friend gush is enough.

He has long since forced himself into strict routines so if you struggle to get tasks started or get distracted in the middle of them he's understanding but stern. Tends to cause more harm than good because he talks down to you unintentionally.

If you're a visual/hands on learner he also gets frustrated with you for wasting hours trying to figure it out yourself and getting yourself upset instead of just letting him do it for you. You get into a lot of fights about it at first. He gets better when he sees it genuinely prevents you from enjoying things or trying new things and that you just kinda default to defeated and helpless. He didn't mean to make you feel dumb, he just doesn't understand why you wouldn't want help. Until the tables turn and as he's getting worked up over something he can't figure out and you just stare at him.

He finally snaps at you what the hell you're doing and you smirk "need help? Why don't I just do it for you and you watch? Come on, you've been struggling for an hour, stop being so stubborn and just let me do it. I'll show you later, it's not hard." You feed his own lines back at him and his stomach drops.

"Oh....that feels...mmmm. Nope! Don't like that. Ok. Won't happen again, doll."

Realistically if you work with him and you make mouth noises a lot (bird whistles, tongue clicks, humming, random shrieks) he will get annoyed. It's distracting him and sometimes you don't realize you're doing it and mess up anything he tries to record. The first few times he snaps at you and it causes problems (hello rejection sensitive dysphoria) but eventually he learns how to better talk to you/communicate without accidentally convincing you he hates you.

Alastor

Probably on the spectrum himself, but it also could just be his anti-social habits. Either way he finds you entertaining and your bouts of sporadic energy and gremlin like behavior don't phase him. He's been dealing with Niffty for years.

If you sing or hum a lot to get work done, or listen to music he's all for it. But if you're the type of ADHD where work fast music=horny and bass he'll insist you wear headphones. If you're content to listen to swing (he'll compromise with electroswing) or jazz, he'll play the radio for you.

He doesn’t even care if you're a good singer or not, he just likes seeing you get into it. Will show off by singing it better than you though.

If you're someone who picks your fingers or skin, he'll slap your hands. You bleeding is making him hungry and distracting him. He'll find you something else to do with your hands. Same with nail biting.

He tends to pull his hair when stressed so if you stim with your hair he gets it and unless it's harmful (eating/pulling) he'll leave it, but if you're like him he's either cutting your hair short or braiding it.

Will die before admitting it but thinks you flapping, hopping, clapping, squealing is the most adorable thing ever. Also, laughs at you if you smack yourself, though.

Doesn't understand your memes so half your echolalia go over his head and he just kinda stares at you.

Scolds you for not sitting in the chair properly.

Smiles, nods, and occasionally says "that's nice dear" when you info dump. It's not that he doesn't care, he just can't listen to something he's not interested in for that long.

Mouth noises make his eye twitch but so long as they don't interrupt him, he won't scold you.

He understands you're not dumb but he also doesn't have the patience to help your or wait for you to get things done so he does them for you and tells you stop pouting when you get upset with him.

He likes you enough to not reject your touch and enjoys being in your space, but please refrain from happy biting the cannibal. He will bite back and it's less cute when he does.

Lucifer

The original AUDHD. You two chatter for hours about special interests.

He makes you stim toys.

You two do the adhd laugh so hard over dumb shit you gotta hold onto and smack each other thing. You both wind up on the floor.

Literally would never talk down to you or trigger your RSD. He's spent centuries feeling like he's constantly annoying, dumb, and struggling to time manage and do tasks.

Is equally fed up with people offering to do things for him because he can do it he just needs help getting started. The more you ask if he wants you to do it or when he's gonna do it the harder it is. So you two just sorta hobble together a system for getting shit done.

It's not perfect but if it gets outta hand he can just snap his fingers and fix it.

He happy flaps with his hands and wings and constantly knocks you or other shit over. It embarrasses him but you're in love. You two sometimes hold hands to do the happy bounce squeal, shaking each other.

He initiates happy bites more than you do. Honestly you both start looking like chew toys.

You two echolali all the time and share new ones you find. If you ever can't find each other, just shout one of your current vocal stims and he'll respond.

Literally, the definition of choas couple.

[fandoms-x-reader]

Teenage!MC with ADHD

@ivediedmorethan20times

Headcannons

Summary: The brothers and side characters reaction to a teenage MC who had ADHD. The Demon Brothers and Diavolo, Barbatos, Simeon, and Solomon. Platonic/Sibling Relationship A/N: Please forgive me if this isn't completely accurate. I don't personally know anyone with ADHD and I know there are different types but I did my best!

Lucifer struggled a bit with your ADHD at first. But it was only because he had a hard time getting you to focus on your tasks. 

He would ask you to do something at school or chores around the house, and he would notice that you always had a hard time completing them.

You would either completely forget the fact that he had asked you to do it, or you would get distracted in the middle of it and the task would remain undone.

Lucifer didn't know that you had ADHD and he was having a particularly bad day. He snapped the slightest bit at you when he noticed that you had once again forgotten to do something he asked.

You apologized and explained that you weren’t doing it on purpose and as soon as you told Lucifer that you had ADHD he understood that this was something beyond your complete control.

He felt bad for snapping at you and went easier on you from then on, simply asking you again or reminding you if he wanted you to get something done.

And, he made sure that Diavolo knew about your ADHD so that he didn’t end up in the same confused state Lucifer had been in.

He sees you as family just like he sees his little brothers and he would never think negatively of you having ADHD.

Mammon exhibits signs of ADHD himself so you and him probably have a lot in common.

He’ll constantly interrupt others and is always on the move. He can never sit still and is easily distracted. He’s the whole package.

Honestly, when it comes to the House of Lamentation the others make small bets to see which of you was going interrupt the other one first.

Mammon doesn’t really notice that you had ADHD and even if you told him that you had it, he wouldn’t understand what you were talking about. Do all teenagers talk in abbreviations?

When you explain what it is, Mammon does admit that it has some similarities to his own personality. But, he didn’t care at all.

If you and he acted the same way then even better! You should consider yourself lucky that the Great Mammon and you have similarities.

In all actuality though, you’d probably have a better grasp of things than Mammon and he ends up learning tricks from you on how to control his impulsive behavior and manage his restlessness.

Mammon is really grateful to have you. 

Levi had a tendency to excessively talk when it came to something that he cared about.

Though he rarely had the opportunity where someone would actually listen to what he had to say.

When he realized that you also rambled on Levi was excited to have someone else in the House of Lamentation that was like him.

If you took an interest in the things that he liked, he would love having conversations with you.

Those conversations would be long and full of interesting points of view but they left you both feeling heard on your opinions.

Levi had a bit of trouble playing games with you because you got easily bored and liked switching between games.

He didn’t mind changing games as long as you least let him get to the save point first.

He’s one of the brothers that would handle your ADHD well.

Satan didn’t quite understand why he was having such a hard time getting you to focus on your schoolwork at first.

He had been tasked with making sure you stayed on top of your studies but whenever the two of you sat down to study, you would either zone or just get completely distracted by something else.

The first time it happened, Satan thought that you were just particularly tired that day. But, when it kept happening, Satan realized it was more than being tired.

He did some research on his own and when he believed he had found the diagnosis he asked you if you had ADHD.

When you told him that you did have ADHD, he felt a sense of accomplishment that he had found the answer.

He’ll continue to do more and more research to try and find a way to help you focus.

By the end of it all, he knows more about ADHD than you do. 

And he’s always trying to give you tips and tricks on help to manage it.

He wasn’t trying to be annoying. He was just trying to help.

Asmo was trying really hard to bond with you. But, he was having a hard time, because it seemed like every time the two of you were talking you completely ignored him.

You either looked like you were in a different world or your attention was on something that was completely unimportant.

Asmo thought that you didn’t like him or that you thought he was boring and his feelings were genuinely a bit hurt.

He just wanted to bond with you like his brothers had.

When you explained that it wasn’t him but your ADHD he felt relieved and when you told him what having ADHD was like he felt like you shouldn’t have to apologize for it.

Asmo doesn’t want anyone else misinterpreting you so he’ll take photos or short videos and post them to social media - with your permission, of course - to help spread awareness.

Now that he knows what it is, Asmo finds your ADHD adorable. Humans can have the funniest quirks sometimes.

Beel may not fully grasp the concept of ADHD, but he knows that it’s a part of you, and because of that, he finds it precious. 

He loves it whenever he sees a symptom of your ADHD.

If you were zoning out, he would make sure you were doing it somewhere safe.

After all, he had a lot of practice with people zoning out thanks to Belphie.

If you were feeling restless, Beel would make sure to go with you wherever you wanted to go or do whatever you wanted to do.

He knew demons didn’t know what ADHD was but he dared someone to try and make fun of you for having it.

He would be so quick to defend you. He won’t let anyone try to make you feel bad for something that you can’t control.

And he made sure that you knew that if you ever needed anything to come to him. You were part of his family now.

When Belphie first found out that you had ADHD, he thought that you were just messing with him.

He was sleeping on the couch next to you and you had constantly been moving, shaking the couch a bit.

Belphie thought that you were just trying to prevent him from sleeping as a joke.

But when he asked you to stop he noticed how uncomfortable you looked just sitting completely still.

He asked if something was wrong and you told him it was hard for you to sit still because of your ADHD. 

He had a blank expression on his face, not understanding what you had said to him so you went further into your explanation.

Belphie understood by the end of it and allowed you to continue moving if you needed to. He was the Avatar of Sloth and he could fall asleep anywhere under any circumstances.

He found it funny when you would space out and just stare at nothing in particular.

It reminded him of himself before he passed out.

But you didn’t seem to have the same tendency he had to just fall asleep after daydreaming.

Lucifer had been the one to tell Diavolo about your ADHD and as much as he hated to admit it, he had to do some research to understand what exactly it was.

Once he understood it though, Diavolo did everything he could to ensure you would be comfortable down here in the Devildom.

He made sure that your workload wasn’t too much because he didn’t want to overwhelm you and he knew that you would have a hard time completing large amounts of work.

With how busy he was, Diavolo didn’t get much of a chance to see your ADHD in action. But when you came over for the retreat at the castle, Diavolo noticed all of the traits that Lucifer had told him about. 

He couldn’t help but be curious about your symptoms. He paid close attention and made sure to incorporate what he had learned into your future days in the Devildom.

It was his job as the future King of the Devildom to ensure that everyone enjoyed their time in his kingdom and you were no exception.

Barbatos, like Lucifer, struggled with your ADHD at first. He was a very punctual demon so when he noticed you consistently showing up late or not completing your tasks, he was slightly irritated. 

He thought you were just being a typical teenager and neglecting your tasks because you simply didn’t feel like doing them.

Lucifer was also the one who told Barbatos that you had ADHD and what all that entailed. 

Barbatos was determined to help you get some sense of order in your life. 

He knew that you couldn’t always control when you got distracted and that you had a hard time focusing.

But, he was hoping that he would be able to help you - at least enough to stay on top of your school work.

Barbatos would reward you when you managed to stay on track, feeling proud as if he had raised you himself.

He doesn’t mind your other symptoms at all. He believed they were all things that helped make you unique. Things that everyone in the Devildom had come to admire.

The first time Simeon had watched you zone out, he thought that there was something wrong with you.

He wasn’t sure if someone had placed a curse on you or if you were having a human problem - a stroke maybe? Either way, he was panicking.

He immediately started calling for Lucifer and his worried voice pulled out of your thoughts. “Simeon, what’s wrong?” you asked him and he had never breathed such a big sigh of relief. 

He told you that he thought there had been something wrong with you and it made you laugh.

You assured him that you were okay and explained your ADHD. 

Simeon was much better prepared the next time it happened and he did not freak out.

He did find it interesting that humans could have something like ADHD. The human species was a strange one.

Simeon likes it when you explain your symptoms to him. He loves learning about humans from you and if you ever need any help from him, he won’t hesitate.

Solomon immediately knew the signs of ADHD. He had known many people in the human world who had it as well.

So he wasn’t panicked or confused when you would zone out or fidget. And he was incredibly patient when it came to you accidentally talking over him or rambling on.

He knew how to react to people with ADHD and it was comforting to talk to him because of how good he was with you. 

You and Solomon ended up getting along pretty well because of this.

You were lucky that he had been chosen as the other human exchange student because you weren’t sure how long you would have survived down here without him.

Solomon enjoyed your presence a lot because he thought of you like a little sibling and couldn’t help but find it adorable when one of your ADHD symptoms would present itself. 

He definitely will try to give you charms that he created to keep with you at school to try and help improve your focus.

He didn’t want to think about the demon brothers’ reactions if you started failing your classes. Especially Lucifer and Satan.

[dramaticallycryingblood]

Things I don’t get about the marauders fandom as someone who’s been obsessed with them for literal years

1. How we let so many characters be only children?? like I get that people don’t necessarily want to make OCs but HOW did it get to this? James, Marlene, Peter, Remus, Mary, Barty, Dorcas, Alice, Frank and so many others! Idk maybe it’s just where I’m from but look me in the eyes and tell me you know that many people who don’t have siblings ALSO the ratio is so off and barely any of them have only child energy. It’s just not right.

2. How sooo many of you aren’t multi shippers. Like what do you MEAN you can only see James with Regulus and Regulus with James?? What about bartylus? what about sunrose? what about draksun/sunkiller? what about moonwater? what about jily? what about prongstail? WHAT do you read?? Aren’t you bored??? WHAT DO YOU MEAN you only have ONE ship for each character???? As a multi shipper, I can be convinced of any ship with anything ranging from a real good fic or a pretty edit to an enthusiastic rant from a random person on TikTok and it just makes things interesting. Maybe my adhd brain just needs more ships to focus on or maybe some of you just lack flexibility ( or imagination), but we need to fix this cause there aren’t enough fics with the ships I like 😭😭

3. THE SHIP NAMES. I can’t be the only one who thinks some of these suck right? Like why are we saying jegulus when starchaser and sunseeker are RIGHT THERE?? Same with jily and flowerpot, and bartylus and starkiller. ALSO some names make me wonder if some of you just haven’t grasped the concept of ship names or if I just got it all wrong cause marylily and jegulily are just annoying, why are we keeping the L in Lily? The point is to merge the names together not stick them one beside the other, I just say marily and jeguily because it rolls off the tongue so much more easily

4. The Peter erasure. I just don’t get it, it’s so easy to include him in things, you don’t have to make him a main character, but just mention him every once in awhile. Sometimes I’m reading an important scene in a fic and everyone is mentioned EXCEPT for Peter! It’s so easy, just make him roll his eyes at his friends being idiots or something. And it’s not like you’ll get his personality wrong, ALL THESE CHARACTERS PERSONALITIES WERE MADE UP BY FANS but I understand that some people lack imagination so here’s some things about Peter I like to imagine: he’s a HUGE gossip, like my man sees and hears everything and he takes notes!! He likes to randomly turn into a rat and take a nap in one of the other marauders’ pocket, he does it so much that they had to tell the girls that they had a pet rat cause they were asking too many questions. He’s really perceptive and his friends are all oblivious so it leads to funny scenarios like:

Remus & Sirius after YEARS of pining: we’re dating

Peter: I thought you guys had been together since third year?

Sirius: I’ve literally introduced you to people I was dating?!

Peter, shrugging: look mate I don’t question you lot anymore, you do whatever you want, I don’t care what you’re into, I just don’t wanna know about it

He also pulls people, like he’s really nice and will gossip to anyone who’s in his vicinity so he’s friends with basically everyone and he’s funny and pretty and he’s got charisma so he just charms everyone and when I say everyone, I mean everyone, even the slytherins have a soft spot for him (that’s how he gets accepted among the death eaters during the war actually). In pranks he’s the lookout so he often has to distract the teachers so he asks them random things and spits out half-made up facts about anything so he’s besties with most of the teachers which means he doesn’t get many detentions.

5. The Black brothers, more specifically the way the speak to each other in most fics, like they call each other “brother” so often and as someone who has a brother I’ve never called him that. Is it an anglophone thing? Like do people who speak English at home all do that or are fic writers only children?? (That would explain my first point actually) Or is it more a rich people thin?? Cause I know it’s not a francophone thing that’s for sure (also special mention to people who don’t know anything about French writing Sirius and Regulus as French speakers, I can tell you don’t know what you’re writing about but I eat it up everytime anyway)

6. This is actually just about ao3 but I WANNA BE ABLE TO LEAVE MORE KUDOS!!! I just loooooove fics but I can’t leave kudos at every single chapter and I’m bad at writing comments so I can’t show the author how much I love their work, I hate itttt 😭

7. Why there aren’t more fics about the Black family, and not just Sirius and Regulus, but Andromeda, Bellatrix and Narcissa as well like that would be so interesting and maybe like a deep dive into the Black family ideals and all that (if you have fic recs I’m all ears!!)

8. How jegulily is a pretty popular ship (which I LOVE) yet SO FEW people ship Regulus and Lily outside of it! They are a power couple and I love them and they don’t need James to work!!!

9. Why there isn’t more background Minnie x Poppy cause they are my mothers and I wanna see them moooooreeee

If you read all of this I love you 🥰 have an amazing day/night

[copperbadge]

Every so often I get an Anon ask where I'm not entirely comfortable responding in public with no cut or warnings ahead of the text -- it's not that anything inappropriate is being said, it's just sometimes the subject matter's a little rough. This is one of those, so I decided to copy and paste it and put it behind a cut; warnings for discussion of abuse and fraught familial situations.

You've spoken about having ADHD before, and i was wondering if you have any links to websites with resources for adults with ADHD that are more than the very generic "stay organised!", "eat healthily!", "avoid distractions!" things? like, something that explains ADHD and WHY getting organised is good, maybe? or how ADHD may intersect with anxiety? my mother finally went to a doctor and got (as i expected) an ADHD diagnosis, but the doctor told her medication wouldn't give her much at this point, which is fine, but she's just kept going as usual for her, which is not.

she has ignored everything i've told her before (like, to think ahead and prioritise, to make plans, to make lists, that she has to be systematic about it, to stay calm because if she has a plan everything should be done on time) but she ignores me. she just starts doing whatever, whenever, and then getting annoyed/anxious that "nothing" is done, and then she starts yelling at me.

i just want her to realise she MUST at least attempt to be organised, and that it's not just for work stuff, it's for everything, including every day stuff like chores. (also, i'd like to stop being yelled at. like, some of my first memories are of getting yelled at. it's been years and years of regular bouts of screaming. now i know it's her and not me, and i'd. like it to stop)

i apologize for the huge ask/rant, but yeah, do you know of any resources that explain the importance of being organised? i think if i show her something 'official' maybe she'll start doing it. or do you have any personal tips for talking to her about it? or a book about someone's experience with ADHD? anything. anything at all.

So there is...much to unpack here, as the kids say, both in terms of what you are asking directly and what you are not asking but what I'm going to address anyway. I don't have any great resources for what you're looking for, because neurodiversity comes in a lot of shapes and sizes even within a single diagnosis, and as you likely know I'm a big proponent of doing-what-works, and that's something a person has to figure out for themselves. A lot of people seem to find ADDitude very relatable and they are informative, but that's probably the best general resource out there to go deeper than surface, and a good place for her to start reading if she wants to.

But the real problem, Anon, is that she's never going to listen to you.

That seems like a real bold statement, but it is also extremely likely to be true. Most people who get a diagnosis start to work on themselves and learn more about their unique neurology; it's clear she's not going to do that, and you can't make her. I'm sure some of it is that she's been told her entire life, by people with much more power over her than you, to do those things: be organized, make lists, have a plan. They are the hardest things for people with ADHD to do, and she can't simply whip herself through them, and so she learned long ago to ignore anyone saying anything about it. Medication could help with that a lot, actually, so your mother's doctor really fucked you both by telling her it wouldn't do anything for her; whether she's taken that as permission to ignore the problem or whether she just believed him, he did a really shitty thing in doing that.

Your mother is neurologically incapable of forcing herself to do many things that neurotypical people find easy. There are workarounds, yes; some of us do extremely well if we decide that EVERYTHING has to be planned, and behave accordingly. Some of us find stopgaps. But that has to be a decision she makes, to find workarounds for herself. It's not something you can offer her with helpful websites or books, because she is also likely very deep in shame about it, to judge from her other behaviors. That's not your fault, which means it's also not your job to fix it.

And here's the other problem: you are in an abusive home situation where your mother is taking out her frustration with her mental illness by hurting you.

And that really really sucks and I'm really, really sorry. But the screaming-at-you, which absolutely should not be happening, is a result of decades of frustration at the world that won't accommodate her, combined with an inability to regulate her emotions. Unless she is medicated or learns better regulation or at least picks a different target, it's not going to stop. That's not your fault either. Some of it isn't even her fault. (Some of it is; mental illness is not our choice but it is our responsibility, and she is not behaving as either an adult or a parent should in abusing you because she can't find somewhere else to put all her emotions.)

Presumably you are either too young to leave or can't afford to, but the best possible thing you can do for yourself is get out as soon as you can, sever yourself from her financially, and then decide what level of interaction you want with her going forward. Honestly, may be the best thing for her as well, to realize that if she doesn't make a change, she will lose access to her child.

I realize that is almost certainly not immediately possible, however. Do not leave if you are going to a less safe situation, either. Be smart and strategic -- make your plans and prepare as much as possible ahead of time.

"So in the meantime, Sam, what the fuck am I supposed to do?"

Bearing in mind that we are going to assume you cannot help your mother, as she either doesn't want help or is in denial or both, the best thing you can do if you can't get out is to shore yourself up: remind yourself as regularly as possible that none of this is your fault, and do your best to protect yourself both emotionally and physically. IE, if she's not organized enough to buy groceries or cook, do what you can to make sure you are regularly fed -- do not concern yourself with whether she eats. That's her responsibility, she's a grownup. If you are likely to be yelled at for this -- well, she was always going to yell at you about something; it might as well be as a result of you caring for yourself first. As much as you can, spend time away from her if possible.

Given her past behavior, especially if you are an only child or oldest sibling, you may already be de-facto head of household; this may be simply a process of assuming actively that she can't fulfill that role, and doing what you can to care for yourself and any siblings. If you have other family who understand the situation, I strongly suggest tapping them for help. As much as you can, reach out to adults in your life you trust, and get their help in caring for yourself and your family without needing to depend on her for support.

I don't wish to stigmatize mental illness or addiction but living with someone in denial about the impact of their mental health on those around them is exactly like living with an addict: the best strategy is to expect nothing from them, remind yourself often that you are not to blame for this situation, look out for yourself first and foremost, and get out once you can. I'm really sorry it has to be that way, because it shouldn't be. But I'm concerned with you, not with her, and if you want to build a better life for yourself, it's going to have to be one that doesn't depend on you being able to change someone else.

I'm afraid I don't have a lot of books for you about that, either. I wish you all the luck -- you shouldn't need it, but unfortunately sometimes we still do.

[awarmbowlofhomemadesoup]

There’s some weird dissonance reading Leosagi fics first before watching Samurai Rabbit: The Usagi Chronicles. I mean it, I enjoyed the fics, truly. But some of them made Yuichi more like Miyamoto Usagi than himself (and I’m not saying it’s a bad thing). It’s just funny after finishing 2 seasons of SRTUC because:

While Miyamoto Usagi has a resting bitch face, Yuichi did NOT inherit it. Yuichi has a resting space face when he’s not getting excited about his ancestor or Yokai.

2. He wants to be like his ancestor so bad, but he’s just too wholesome.

3. A lot of people have already said this in a lot of posts, but dude is a disaster (affectionate):

Whooping and swinging his sword and yelling he doesn’t need a sensei after making a promise to his auntie that he would find one and treat the sword with respect.

Almost got run over by heavy traffic (and is not aware of it)

Pissed off every single one of his would-be friends who were ready to beat him up.

Was given a wide selection of mystical weapons, and ended up with a yoyo because he got distracted by it. 

AND went to jail. That’s just his first day in Neo Edo. 

He is not easily distracted, he's "momentarily focused" on other things ("oh look, a bird!")

Went into a self-induced drug trip after trying so hard to meditate

4. While Yuichi can be spacey and distractible, he’s already a skilled swordsman with good instincts and reflexes. What he lacked was experience and something to temper his one-track mind.

5. When the show said he’s “all ears, no brain,” they meant it. Guy keeps syrup packets in his pockets so that he’s always prepared. (for desserts, ig) 

6. “All ears, no brain,” was said within his hearing range and it just went through his head because he’s too excited about fighting yokai like his great-great-greatx grandpa.

7. Has the selfishness and self-centeredness of someone with ADHD (and I’m not saying that’s a bad thing). He can be so caught up in wanting to be a hero, he would sometimes not listen to his friends, or hog the mission for a chance to be remembered for a thousand years.  

8. He wants to be the main character so bad:

Jumped into conclusions with Gen and made a wanted person escape.

Attacks yokai on sight to live out his fantasy of being like Miyamoto Usagi

Tries to pilot a giant robot and did well for 1.5 seconds.

Risks his life more than once by making contact with a giant magic crystal that could’ve burned him alive with too much power.

He’s goddamn lucky his show is for a younger audience or he’d be traumatized along with Leo (and his bros) from rottmnt, Luz from TOH, and MK from Lego Monkie Kid. 

9. Likes one-liners because it’s like in his comics/manga of his greatx grandpa. (”Put down the pig, or I’ll put down the hurt -wait, I can do better than that.”)

10. But yeah, all of that and he’s still a polite and considerate kid who sincerely wants to help people and his friends and will do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do. 

Saves the three people who were going to beat him up.

Got delighted when the three people who were ready to beat him up were there to rescue him. (”Are we friends now? :D”)

Wants to hug them in the first hour of meeting them.

Somehow convinced one of the most terrifying yokai to be his sensei.

Would babble about yokai in the middle of fighting one.

Risks the city for an alien.

Like I know some people can’t stand its animation. It’s not the best, but it’s not bad either. Anyway, this is the Yuichi Usagi that I have known from the show and I’m glad I’ve met him. 

[maggplays]

Bio? Something like that.

How did I start modding? Literally no one has asked this, but here's my story, don't worry it's not long... I guess that depends on what your definition of “long” is, haha! Hang on, here we go.

On a random day in January, 2024, a few days before my birthday, I might add... I woke up to stars in my right eye. A few days later, I was told I had a very rare injury and it would never heal. Those are not words an artist/gamer wants to hear! Long story short, I am now legally blind in my right eye. If you think, oh that's not a huge deal, you can still see. Humor me, get a cheap pirate eyepatch, put that on, then pour yourself a cup of coffee. Not as easy as you thought, right? Depth perception. It’s a thing. Anyway, on with the story. Suffice it to say, I was depressed. Majorly. Then, through some random conversation somewhere, I found Stardew Valley.

Perfect! 2D animation, cute pixel art, story that's not sugar-coated anime, I love it! Got to year 3, TBH I've never played past year 3 because ADHD, and realized the dialogue was quite lacking. Then I discovered mods. What the-, it's a freakin' goldmine! Downloaded a lot of things, mostly dialogue, and tossed half of them. While playing through a Sebastian run, I saw it. Oh. My. God. It's a coding error glaring at me in my dialogue box. This is NOT acceptable. I tried to ignore it, but then it happened again. Okay, time for some investigation. I opened the folder and found... json files. Interesting, I wasn't entirely clueless since I do know HTML code from back when the internet was a baby, Facebook had no ads, and dinosaurs roamed the earth. Okay, okay, the internet was more like a spoiled toddler. Yes, I'm old. Shut up. But I digress. It didn't take long to discover the misplaced punctuation and go on my merry reality-avoiding way. Until I got bored again.

I looked for more Seb mods, but there were like seven. Three were yandere, not my jam, and only 2 were updated for 1.6 and were dialogue-only. Solution? Make my own mod for myself. I spent six weeks downloading mods, learning code, Googling to very little effect, writing dialogue, learning how to make an event, discovering I knew nothing, and on and on. The perfect distraction from the whole eye thing. I finished a decent draft, loaded it up, and praise Yoba, it worked! And on we play. At some point, I saw a comment complaining about the lack of Sebastian dialogue mods. Huh, yep, they're right. Too bad. Oh. Well, I guess I could load this thing I made, it's really just my own internal story monologue while playing the game, I'm NOT a writer, and most people probably won't get it. But I did spend a lot of time on this, and maybe someone out there will like it. Heck, no skin off my nose since it's free. So I took a deep breath, made peace with my inner demons, and threw it out into the void of Nexus, expecting it to be swallowed up and ignored. That... didn't happen.

In the first few hours, several people downloaded it. Huh, Nexus must have a decent search algorithm. That was literally all I thought about it. The next day, 300 downloads. And comments! Mostly positive with the exception of one wild demand I subsequently ignored. At one week, it had 3,000 unique downloads. I was floored, 3,000 weirdos downloaded my mod. Add to that, people seemed to actually like it! I've never gotten so much positive feedback for anything in my life. Seriously. Apparently, my oddball internal monologue, thanks ADHD, is quite entertaining. Heck, might as well make another one... and here we are. Yes, I've gotten negative comments and unreasonable demands, but I do my best to ignore them and practice staying positive. Trolls be damned! It's a lot harder to do that for yourself than for other people, turns out.

So, bottom line, found something interesting? Try it! Does it make you happy? Keep doing it! Even if it's only for yourself, do the thing and let it make you smile. Share it with the world if you're so inclined. Get out there and kick ass!!

[sirfrogsworth]

The Babylon Bee School of Comedy

Have you ever wanted to make Elon Musk reply to you with a double cry laughing emoji?

If you crave that sweet billionaire validation you need only follow this carefully crafted conservative comedy content creation course for that powerhouse of online satire... The Babylon Bee.

Soon you too could be bootlicking billionaire balls with the rest of The BBee writers.

Are you ready to get your learn on?

Let us Bee-gin.

The number one most important rule that all The BBee writers must internalize to their core...

Conservative comedy abhors effort.

Brainstorming for hours on end to craft the perfect premise and punchline... is for the Libs. Check out this Facebook meme that got 10,000 likes.

Can you order Starbucks from a bar? Doesn't matter, it's a snowflake drink for a snowflake Lib.

Does this joke not have an actual punchline? Doesn't matter, get lost you stupid Lib!

Is this technically a joke by definition? Doesn't matter, if you believe it is a joke, then it's a joke! Just like modern currency.

If you put too much thought into a joke, it might grow in complexity. That could be confusing! The death knell of any conservative joke are the words, "Hmm, that's a thinker."

This brings us to rule number two...

NO THINKERS!

Let's take this Ben Garrison comic as an example.

Spell everything out! Label everything! Don't leave anything to the imagination! If your audience has to figure something out or draw their own conclusions, what fun is that?

Conservatives want to hear things that are familiar. They want their beliefs parroted back at them. You must regurgitate those beliefs and then just make it *sound* like a joke. Don't break new ground or introduce new ideas. Don't get all caught up in interesting wordplay or clever puns or subverting expectations.

All expectations should be fully verted.

That is definitely a word because I saw someone use it on Facebook. End of research.

Here is a helpful tip. If you can't imagine the joke coming out of the mouth of late night comedy genius GUTFELD!, then you need to dial it back a bit. Do not surpass GUTFELD! levels of humor. GUTFELD! is your touchstone.

Oh, GUTFELD! I laughed so hard I FELD it in my GUT.

See, I went too far with my fancy pun. That is not the GUTFELD! way.

But what happens if inspiration is fleeting and you can't pay attention to your comedy writing task because you don't believe ADHD is real and thus you are unmedicated?

Don't you worry. If you do happen to get writer's block or are distracted by a funny Pepe meme or a shiny object, just call your racist uncle and say the magic word... "Bidenflation."

As the ensuing unhinged rant darts from subject to subject without any kind of connecting theme, just start writing down every right wing buzzword you hear. Then just insert those buzzwords Mad Libs-style into a derivative joke format.

Let's practice!

Ex. 1: Why did the PRONOUNS cross the BORDER? To get to the DRAG QUEEN STORY HOUR!

Ex. 2: How many GENDERS does it take to GROOM a lightbulb? Two! One to hold the BUTT PLUG and one to GO WOKE, GO BROKE.

Great start! I'm sure with a polishing pass those will make more sense. Or not. The bar is pretty much "will it get clicks?" so we're not too worried about coherence.

Heh... Mad Libs.

U MAD, LIBS?

Get it? Cuz Libs are always mad? About the normalized bigotry and whatnot.

Jokes are always better when you need to explain them.

Oh! That's another rule. Write that down. Wisdom like this is why I am teaching this course, of course. Hah, that's like that horse show song. I got jokes coming out the wazoo. Wazoo is my butt, right? Siri, is wazoo a butt? Oof, I'm kinda spacing on what the next lesson is.

I really wish Matt Walsh hadn't flushed my Adderall down the crapper.

Can I get a second opinion? Top Gun was so good. What does Tom Cruise think about ADHD? He always has good takes on stuff like this. Did I leave my oven on? Shazam, what song goes doodoo doo doo doooooo? Can you vacuum a yard? Has anyone tried that? That sounds more like a marijuana thought than an ADHD tangent. I should double check the THC content of that cotton candy vape juice.

I'm flyin' off the rails over here.

Matt, are you super duper sure it's not real?

Okay, fine. I'm an "energetic boy."

I hope whichever fish absorbs my meds is extra focused on whatever fish shit he needs to get done.

COMEDY WRITING!

Sometimes it is best to learn through observation. Let's eavesdrop on an actual The BBee writer's room to see how the sausage is made...

"So what did your racist uncle have to say?"

"Well, first he texted me a cameraphone picture of Trump as an astronaut that he wants me to print out cuz he doesn't know what a crypto wallet is... but then he said all the woke schools are turning kids into a bunch of gay commies."

"EUREKA!"

Classic! The BBee writers strike again. I mean, they aren't striking. There is no commie clamoring for a union at The Babylon Bee. That's for damn sure. FOCUS!

Do you get the joke though? With the kids and the gay and the communism?

Because all of those woke schools totally cover complex economic theories in 4th grade and all it takes to turn gay is a little persuasion from a teacher with green hair. Libs of TikTok wouldn't lie about that. End of research.

Look at this public school teacher!

I mean, you knooow she has a litter box in her classroom. I can just sense it. End of research.

Sure... it is just a context-free picture of a person with green hair in front of a flag and you cannot actually judge the quality of their teaching ability from this. But yoouuu knoooooow she is skipping right over grammar lessons and giving detailed instructions on how to turn gay.

Step 1: Look at a bunch of butts. Step 2: Touch a bunch of butts. Step 3: Gay sex a bunch of butts.

(Replace butts with cooches for lesbians.)

Grooming accomplished.

And you definitely shouldn't look up that green-hair'd, nose ring'd educator and research her any further. Extensive research is for the Libs, bro. Because you definitely don't want to discover she is a passionate high school English teacher who makes fun content on TikTok in the hopes that people will buy things off her wishlist so her students will have a better learning experience. I mean, caring about her students? That's so gay.

YoooOOOuuuUUU knnnooooooOOOw she is a bad teacher because she has green hair and a flag. End. Of. Research.

So... you have your gay communist headline that is perfect to get all of those sweet conservative clicks. But you still have a full webpage to fill out with more words and stuff.

Now I want to see if you learned anything from my perfectly focused and informative teachings. I want you to write some jokes about kids becoming gay communists.

Ready? GO!

Joke #1 Little Billy has wealthy parents so all the students will share his cookie at snack time.

Joke #2 At the beginning of the day, students pick a new gender out of a hat but all the kids fight over Attack Helicopter.

Joke #3 At lunch, the students have to stand in a peanut butter and jelly bread line.

Joke #4 The teacher makes the kids take turns combing each others' hair for a grooming session.

Wait a sec... are those... THINKERS?

No no no no no! You made my brain all confused and thinky!

You need to calm down, you overachieving silly billy. You forgot the first rule... NO EFFORT.

Just make the same joke over and over again with slightly different wording. EASY!

Remember the classic final rule of comedy...

Jokes always get funnier the more you repeat them.

Anyway, that's probably enough... joke.

Now let's close this article out!

Maybe we can drop the pretense this is comedic satire and just do some hardcore pandering. Gotta own the Libs, amirite?

Gender theory and drag queens and guns, oh my! That is pure pander-monium.

Just shove those factless tactless Tucker talking points straight down their gullet. They'll forget this was supposed to be funny and shake their fist in the air with exaltation. And it's definitely a great idea to put the thought of gunning down drag queens in their heads. That won't backfire in any way!

Congratulations! You are now ready to "write" for The Babylon Bee.

Please purchase this official Trump NFT certificate for $99 that acknowledges that you have completed this course and have a very poor understanding of what satire actually is.

End of research.

[samieree]

Hoi I was wondering if you could do a hiemdall x reader where the reader has adhd or write head cannons? Please

Oh yes! It can be kinda funny thought, because I feel like Heimdall doesn't have much patience in him 😂

I hope I'll write it well, I found behavior of a person with ADHD on the Internet.

So here we go, Heimdall x reader with ADHD headcanons!

When you first met in Asgard, you quickly become one of the most annoying people for him (not more than Thor of Thrud)

He thought he has much patience, really. But after talking with you he had to rethink that.

Heimdall just can't stand when someone talk over him. He may be an asshole, but still believes in culture of discussion.

Not to mention that in your head is almost always chaos. Because of that he often feels confused around you but also intrigued. It's something new to him, not knowing what exactly going on in someone's head.

When he learned you have ADHD suddenly your actions made sense (and he stopped his sarcastic comments on you habits, like tapping fingers on the table or tapping feet. He used to say "Are you sewing something?" when he saw how you leg moves).

Heimdall started looking at you differently and after few days decided to work on his patience (he really needs that).

He got used to reminding you what you were doing/talking about when you got distracted.

Luckily he was already used to explosiveness (thanks to Thor. Okay, Heimdall likes to annoy him, so it's kinda his fault but you know... "He's only speaking the truth, but in a nasty way")

You know, it even became kinda funny for him when you finished the sentence for him. You weren't always right, but when you guessed what he wanted to say it felt like you were reading his mind and he likes that feeling.

Finding you tapping your fingers on the table, he started tapping his but in the different rhythm and like that you were "playing" some songs (Heimdall sometimes starts to hum to himself or even sing quietly. Most of the time you pretend you don't hear it so you can hear his voice in this rare way).

(When you make him aware of what he's doing, he's gonna stop and say "I didn't, you're delusional" or "No, you were").

Okay, we know he is fit, but he doesn't do much to keep his figure (he's a God after all) but with you... He never walked this much.

One day you made around 20 circles just walking on the Wall.

He never was a fan of running and never will be, but he runs after you (Even when Odin told him that he no longer has to watch over you).

Heimdall found himself feeling pretty good in role of your bestie. He is sitting on standing somewhere and you're just walking around him and speaking about your problems, rumours or anything else. He listens, talks back.

Once you asked him to braid you hair.

He didn't agree :(

You looked so sad that he couldn't bare it and next morning came to your room with a brush and hairbands.

Of course he was a bit annoyed, when you couldn't sit in one place. Once he had to start walking after you ("Thank Gods I'm taller than you", "You're lucky I'm skilled at braiding", "Stop or I'm going to tear your hair out and not even on purpose!")

He found a solution for this problem! :D

He noticed that when you draw you always sit in one place and not fidget too much. So apart from a brush and hairbands, he always brings with him sheets of paper, charcoal, pen, ink, paints…

Heimdall got some habits because of you, like taking you by the hand when he feels you get nervous (no matter if you're alone or someone is around).

(Sometimes he even hugs you. Or he playfully pats your head, turning your attention to him)

After a few months Baldur started to joke, that his brother finally found a girl he likes more than his hair (or Odin).

Of course he denied, saying that he simply cares for people in Asgard in general. But inside he couldn't lie to himself.

He began to hug you more often (and he no longer wanted to gain more attention or appreciation from his father).

Once, when you lost your favourite pair of shoes (they were under wardrobe) and he found them... "You're cute when you run like that, looking for something" No, he didn't say that! He's gonna call you delusional, blush and walk away.

He didn't have problems accepting his feelings, he just... Was afraid that you can reject him.

Things changed when he was braiding you hair and you just draw a big, read heart on the paper. You gave it to him, and found him blushing like no one ever before (this sight will never leave your head, he looked kinda cute. Like a beetroot, but cute beetroot).

Not much changed in your relationship after you became a pair, except that you started kissing during the day (and night) and something more... 😏

Teasing remains (but both of you know he's just joking).

Maybe he's even more protective.

Baldur's gonna make fun of him (but he likes you and is happy for his brother's and yours happiness).

In the end, you teached him something (besides how to love and care for someone) - patience (and running fast without superpowers. He thought he was gonna spit out his lungs).

Children? Nah, he has to think about this... (He was just waiting for you to start thinking about it)(He even has names).

-> general masterlist

-> God of War: Ragnarök masterlist

[random-vyxx]

Sooo! Nn DIALTOWN HEADCANONS!! (Tw there are brief mentions of suicide-) [ill get to dsaf headvanons in a different post]

(Also there's a LOT.)

Gingi:

• phonegingi and typegingi are separate beings.

• biology is determined on whats funniest in context.

• can change their sex at will,, like a frog,

• sometimes sleeps at the foot of norms bed like some fatass dog /lovingly /inspiredby that one nrom blog

• they have an immense dislike of beans.

• when asked about any sort of beans they get defensive.

• red-green colour blind

• purrs,,

• has adhd ,,, because,, they,, akt like me,, *

• thinks the narrator and it are homoerotic, the narrator just wants to go home.

• has a hang in there cat poster in its tent.,, stole it from Billy's alternary school when smuggling him out to ask for help summoning satan.

• likes liquorice.

• every 1-3 years gingi has to get a rabies shot. WILL NOT go alone. Has to get someone to take her or else he IS biting a veterinarian.

• Gingi has broken a limb before, they tried gnawing it off but got distracted by an un-watched construction site (gravel yummy yummy)

Karen

• were married. /JOKR.. /perchance?!

• is not only protective of romantic companions (me rn: 🤓👆),, just anyone she likes.

• she doesn't stim often (repressing it n whatnot), but when she does its usually something simple like bouncing onto her heels. *

• HATTTEEESSS blueberries. Oh my god unless they're ripe in the right way she physically cannot make herself eat them. Likes the taste but GOD she cant deal with them. *

• sometimes when she has a painting she didn't like the outcome of, she lets gingi gnaw on it. (She uses non-toxic paints when painting near gingi)

• smart, but she can make dumb decisions out of impulse.

• goth phase, but eventually got out of it because she just.. Didn't like it anymore.

• girlboss, i love her! !!

• her boss HATED her!

• sometimes she gets art block and stares at the canvas, contemplating if shes actually an artist.

• found a leaf that looked strangely like Charlie Chaplin, showed it to gingi and gingi devoured it instantly.

Randal.

• Randy finds it very hard to sleep naturally!! He will curl up around the airvent in the ticket booth.

• shares a braincell with Oliver n Karen.

• as pathetic as he is, can be pretty damn assertive at times.

• not sexually, bro would be shook if he held your HAND.

• he daydreams about some disney ass "getting pushed onto the dance floor and #ROCKING IT!!!!! " (If he got pushed onto a dance floor hed cry.)

• HAS drempt (dreampt? ) about invader zim and rainbow dash frim mlp beating the shit out of him. Has cried to Oliver about it, and Oliver asked if he did or did not deserve their beating,, in the dream.

• honestly kinda in love with Oliver.

• has honestly known Karen a BIT longer than hes known Oliver,, probably met her after leaving his dads house at 16.

• anytime he passes by the swan pond while walking back to the funfair, he starts shaking

• religious trauma, but meeting god kinda eased his fears a bit

• maybe it was the whole "god is really just an alcoholic hobo.. Hm... Maybe im nOT going to hell! He just like me fr! ",, still scared of him tho since if his life got that bad god aint in control.

• ASS EYESIGHT!! cant afford repairs.

• Randy will scarf down ANY food given. Hes usually nervous about being given stuff, but food? No questions asked, already consumed

Oliver

• has some crazy ass habits

• OLIVER IS SMART. IM TIRED OF PRETENDING HES NOT. HE CAN ACT ON IMPULSE, YES, HE CAN MAKE BAD DECISIONS, YEAH, HELL HE CAN SAY DUMB/IMMATURE SHJT BHT HE UD SMAR HE ISS SMA

• actually a pretty good welder, just sometimes uses it for... Evil.

• he welded a dick then him and gingi giggled about it for 38 minutes. He hides it around the scareshack sometimes and when mr dickens finds it, he sighs and places it somewhere new to continue this GOD AWFUL game.

• jokes about committing crimes, but wouldn't,, chaotic good type shiz.

• romance is boring ahh self.*

• likes randy,, but subtly, since hes greyromantic

• once listened to "kiss me son of god" by they might be giants so long he felt physical withdrawal when he WASN'T listening to it. Would pay money to listen to it for the first time again. ****

• used to overbind just because hed forget hes wearing a binder. Average conversation would be like "god randy i feel sick as FUCKK... " "maybe get that checked out..? " "like my chest hurts n shit,, iunno if its actually serious but it does hurt" ".. Oliver are you wearing the binder thingy... If thats what its called-? "*

• Oliver speaks in stage directions, instead of right, he says "stage left"

Bigfoot

• it takes a lot to coax Bigfoot into the city, usually more responsive when karen does it.

• no longer allowed near a car. *

• actually knows several languages, just doesn't speak.

• dude its Bigfoot what can i say, he like 'naners.

Norm

• INTRUSIVE thoughts. Bro is tweaking. *

• whenever he gets intrusive thoughts he feels PHYSICALLY SICK. Like one he gets is doing what he was going to do in the bad ending. One bullet for mingus, one for himself. He wouldn't, definitely not. Giving up his happy ending would be stupid and he knows that. He cant control it though. Thats what intrusive thoughts are. He has yet to tell anybody about them. (Yes im starting his hcs with these two)

• bisexual, had the awakening during his isolation.. Fill in the blanks.

• the hat he wears is,, thank god,, not the infamous erotica hat. Though he has yet to get RID of the erotica hat.

• used to play bloody knuckles. I SWEAR ITS FUN*

• bickers with Mingus a lot, but sometimes they're calm (prolly after some hijinks.)

• was a fucking hOMO for Callum, it was not mutual, and he knew that.*

(tHIS IS NOT ME VILLAIN-IZING ANYONE HERE ITA OKAY TO NOT LIKE SOMEONE BACK I JUST NEED TO ADD TJIS DISCLAIMER BECAUSE SOEM PEOPLE FUCKING SUCK)

• God gets him to make omelettes sometimes. Norm is somewhat freaked out by it, but does it nonetheless because its fucking god.

• sometimes sees bad edits of spaceships going into space on Facebook reels... And he HAS gotten nostalgic over it. *

• isn't ready to date anybody, no siree, but he is able to form close bonds. And thats okay!!!

• sleeps with a rifle under his pillow*

• after little to no contact with fellow humans for YEARS, he is DOGSHIT at several social cues. I dont know if its the autism or the isolation anymore.... Vro also doesn't know about several important events!

• ended up giving gingi a turnip so theyd DHUT UP.

• asked my dad for ideas, he just "double cheeseburger". I dont know what this means.

• The ink spots fan at heart 💖

Mayor Mingus

• The mingling has a specific pin to show they're in it, but nobody knows what it means so they just look fruity. Mingus didn't accept the pin idea, but they did it any ways. She REFUSES to acknowledge the fact she put it on a board in her office.

• Has cat like behaviors,, obviously,, but sometimes shit like purring shows and she HATES it.

• post chapter 3, shes less frantic about fixing callum, but wont put him down,, never.

• head overheats easily become cats cant sweat (a lot)

• tries to get people to shut up as soon as possible, but will negotiate if she deems it necessary. *

• strangely knows "McDonald's lore". Doesn't elaborate.

• Mingus and the rest of the mingling are back as a group, gods no longer in it and bunnys there!!

• has a list of citizen's she dislikes immensely!! If this got leaked, she'd be in big trouble. *

• catnip works. Well. Too well.

• tango will find her high off her ass on catnip,,, just staring at a lamp like a fucking moth.

• The mingling isnt ENTIRELY incompetent now that bunnys back, theyre kinda together as a crime force. Shooty and stabby have yet to be given real weapons but they're still there so the REST of the mafia can say "Honey... We can call the MAYOR for this disrespect. "

• Passively aggressively says "Im fine. " if shes pissed off. [Needs al-kee-hol.. Aka milk]*

• walks her paw-paw around the nursing home just to keep him a little fit. Callum does NOT know who thos strange cat lady is but hes okay with that.

• tired mom-core

• AROACSE!!!! ACE!!! ARO!!!*

[The next characters wont have as many headcanons.]

Abel

• his complaining taught everyone his legal name was "Unabel". Everyone calls him that now.

• Drinks on the job.

• going through a messy divorce. He started it.

• Abelvynny??!!!

• hes alergic to peppermint and coconut.

• strange deja vu when he sees certain phones,, like... Whoever the hell Joe and Harry are, and Tango too for some reason. It confuses him and he does NOT like it.

Bunny

• ABEL DIVORCED HIS ASS WHILE BUNNY WAS IN THE HOSPITAL.

• Disabled because of getting slammed with a fucking machine.

• has prosthetic legs,, because,,, getting slammed with madame mediocre,, AND a call back to callum crown.

• ALSO drinks on the job

• doesn't actually like rabbits, changed his name for marketing.

• eats lemons. *

God / Local Hobo

• RARELY gets seriously mad, and when they do, its not that bad

• Churches weird him out,, but doesn't really care. *

• everyone in town knows them in some way.

• hes the one who pissed on the bank floor

• doesn't actually like eating waffles. He'll eat anything but waffles just are for decorative purposes in his mind.

• genderfluid,, but hes usually too drunk to use anything other than he/they.. Used to use everything though. Maybe when sober they'll use she/her,, but again, rarely sober.

• also has a feminine voice,,, just for sillies. *

Shooty n Stabby

• team rocket type shit

• they datin. They queer.

• their head was done by some dude in an alleyway between an applebees and a hospital.

• Originally he knife headed one is stabby, the gun headed one is shooty. They don't know that,, because they only call eachother "bro".

• dialtown mob isn't even that bad.. They're just incompetent. Like zim compared to the rest of the irken empire. Im sorry invader zim brainrots getting to me.

• HAD good weapons before, because mingus didn't know how shitty they were. Never again. Mingus learnt her lesson.

Theoraur Rustlebelt (famed adventurer and explorer)

• chronic back pain from wrangling large animals. Pain

• Put traps outside of gingis tent, gingi ate them

• sleeps holding a gun.

• says bully so much because its FUCKUNG A FUN WORD OKAY I UNDERSTAND THE HYPWY,, BULLY IS A FUN FUCKJNV WKRD*

• likes the colour green a little.. Too much, just doesn't ever wear it.

Little Billy

• Drinks pure ketchup and its scary. *

• Neurodivergent ,, *

• weed. Lots. [[[Most people thinks it's just kid shit, hes high. who gave him weed. ]]]

• Likes breakcore music (like atari teenage riot and machine girl ) *

• hates everyone equally ♡*

• peanut allergy,, but he mainly eats macaroni so does it matter????

• has one of those silly ass spinny chairs to keep him focused in mingling meetings,, but still easily diverges topic [SPINNY CHAOR IDEA WAS TAKEN FROM SOMEONE ELSS BHT I FORGOT FROM WHOM]

• knows a little too much about knives.*

• favourite knife is a bowie knife, since he finds the history neat. Thinks Jim Bowie did some SICK stuff... But like,, jim bowies still a terrible person and he knows it. Stoll that standoff was epic. This is self projecting im sorry***

• lies a lot, even when not needed. *

• picks up spiders and gives them to people he dislikes. *

• aroace,, but hes 7 so he doesn't know yet.. Nor care.

END!!!!! the amount of aroace headcanons is for a spECIFIC REASON!! (im aroace.)

[alicedash2]

Shanks x Y/N with ADHD

Warning: nope, just fluff

- YN, so, I just wanted to say...- Shanks started to speak, but YN at first paid attention, but, suddenly, his mind started to wander

"Should I have studied? " YN starts to think

"That cloud looks like a boat"

YN starts looking up at the sky, then turning back to Shanks

"His face, he didn't trim his beard like usual"

"What did I eat yesterday?"

- Got it?- Shanks said at the end, YN having his attention back to Shanks

-Hi?- YN said.

-ah, I understand, you can leave it to me- YN said nervously

-... Can you repeat what I just said? - Shanks asked

- ah... - YN gives a nervous smile

- I'll say it again, try to focus, I'll speak more slowly and briefly - Shanks said

- sorry, Shanks- YN says

- ok, it's simple, you just need to reload the pistols and help me load some chests - Shanks says

-Oh, okay!- YN said with a smile

" let's go!" YN think

°•°°°•°•°•°

- It's the last chest...- YN was about to pick up and take the last treasure chest to the ship, when she sees a cat, which was rubbing against the chest

- how cute! He is so sweet!- YN was petting the kitten, completely distracted, but little did YN know that there was someone watching her from afar until a certain moment, YN felt something on her head, behind YN there was a pirate pointing a gun at her head

- don't scream, don't move, just give me the chest...- The pirate said

-Who are you?- YN asked

-Who am I doesn't matter, you're the redhead's girlfriend, huh? You'll serve a good hostage...-

The pirate takes her by the collar and lifts her, he takes her to the ship

- I can't believe it, YN, getting into trouble again? - Yasopp said laughing

- do not laugh! He has a gun pointed at me-- What is that? Wait, he has a gun pointed at me! And why am I being used as a hostage? YOU ARE DISGUSTING!- YN screams angrily

- you're the redhead's girlfriend! You must cost good money for your head, and shut up! - the pirate said while putting the gun on YN's head again

- Red-haired! Give me all your treasure and I'll set she free! Nobody gets hurt!- the pirate said in a big cruel smile

-he... better not - Shanks would say, he knew you would be safe

- why not?! I'll shoot her in the head if you don't do what I say!- the pirate starts screaming, trying to intimidate Shanks

- I think it's hard - Shanks turns and starts walking

- let's go to the ship, let's leave soon - Shanks gets a "yes" from the crew

-I WILL SHOOT- - The pirate finally realizes that YN was out of his hands

- How did she get out?! Where is she?! - the pirate asked

-I think I'm forgetting something, Shanks- YN saidp

- did you clean all the pistols?- Shanks asked, YN nods positively

- and the chests? We're going to need them - Shanks climbed onto the ship

- oh right, I ended up forgetting one! - YN says while going to the chest that he ended up forgetting and takes it back to the ship

- Hey! What are you doing?! You are my hostage!- the pirate frustrated with the situation spoke pointing his finger at YN

- am I? I didn't notice, sorry! I have to go, bye! - YN said while going up to the ship

-What a strange guy! - Yasopp said laughing

- he tried, let him, and YN! - Shanks called YN and then goes to her

- be more careful, although you ran away from him, he could have hurt you - Shanks runs his finger across YN's face

-but... I...- YN tries to speak, but Shanks turns around, asking them to leave soon, because he was having a party and he wanted to drink soon

- come, YN- Shanks called her, YN goes to Shanks-, who puts his arm over YN's shoulders and kisses her on the cheek

- you do thing that's just you can do it!...- Shanks whispers

- It's not my fault!- YN protests

- I know! Go drink and eat something, you haven't eaten anything today- Shanks would say taking her to the kitchen with the rest of the crew, they have fun for the rest of the day, just relaxing and partying

- you're so beautiful - Shanks said

-hm?- YN look at Shanks

- what? - Shanks ask

- I am what?- YN ask to Shanks

- ...-

-...-

-... nothing, let's go- Shanks said and starts walking towards the crew who were drinking

- WAIT! REPEAT! REPEAT WHAT DID YOU SAY! Did you call me what?!- YN scream at Shanks following him

[fatkish]

well hello there i just what to say i love the righting and 2 as u can see i suck at spelling so im sorry. and 3 i wish to know if u could do some mha angst like maybe like kiribaku x adhd reader where like bakugo dosen't mean tell reader to stop talking so fast or to like sit properly and stop moving there leg (i kinda want both cuz i get told that alot but u pick) but then kiri comes home and bakugos is sleeping on the couch and next day, kiri makes bakugo apologises and see how he was wrong. but its up to u. like reader could be overstimulated and cant stop moving. or sumth its up to u but thx for replying if u do don't feel like u need to tho byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Kirishima x Bakugou x Reader Drabble

It was that time of year again. Exams were getting closer and you and Kirishima needed help studying for them. So you both asked your shared boyfriend Bakugou, to help you guys study. Due to your ADHD, you typically take you tests in a different room alone with one of the teachers, that’s because it’s easier for you to focus when there’s less possible distractions. Due to your constant fidgeting, the school has allowed for you to keep a small exercise cycle underneath your desk. This device is similar to an exercise bike with its pedals, but it’s smaller and made to be used when sitting. The cycle is considered a learning tool for you since it allows you to fidget while disturbing as little people as possible.

Sadly, you can’t bring it everywhere with you, if you could then that incident wouldn’t have happened. You and Kirishima had begged Bakugou to help you guys study, so you three went to a cafe. Of course, your Boyfriends knew of your ADHD and how it affected you. They knew that it could only be managed so much, it wasn’t something that could be completely controlled and that it’s something you struggle with. While Bakugou was trying to help you both study, you kept getting distracted by everything and you wouldn’t stop shaking your leg, causing the booth to vibrate.

As you would point out things that you saw that you noticed like someone’s hairstyle or a band t-shirt someone was wearing, Bakugou was starting to get fed up with your inability to focus. You were sitting next to him in the same booth and your constant leg shaking was vibrating the seat and it was driving him crazy. After 1 hour and 30 minutes of your constant interruptions and leg bouncing, Bakugou was at his wit’s end.

“Goddamnit you spacey fuck, can’t you concentrate for more than a couple fucking seconds?!?! And will you fucking quit bouncing your goddamn leg. It’s so fucking damn annoying!” The moment Bakugou registered what he just shouted at you, he realized how much he messed up. You looked at him with watery eyes before your face changed to one of anger.

“I’m leaving” you got up and left the cafe, leaving behind a sorrowful Kirishima and a sorry Bakugou. Bakugou knew he had messed up the moment the words left his mouth. Before Kirishima could say anything Bakugou spoke.

“I know, I know, I messed up and I need to apologize. Don’t worry, I will.”

Kirishima could only look at Bakugou in slight disappointment before he went back to studying.

The next day at school, Kirishima pulled Bakugou aside in the hall outside the classroom and demanded that he apologize to you. Bakugou knew he messed up and was already planning out how he was going to apologize. As they walked into the classroom, they saw you scribbling away in one of your doodle journals. Since most students weren’t in the classroom yet, Bakugou decided to apologize then and there. He walked over and grabbed the back of your shirt, dragging you into the hallway.

“Look, I’m sorry ‘bout what I said yesterday. I was just pissed and I took it out on you.” He mumbled just quite enough for you to hear.

“It’s okay, I know I forgot to bring a fidget and I’ve been trying to manage my symptoms better. I just have to work harder but I appreciate the apology”

“Yeah yeah just shut up” Bakugou muttered as he looked away with a slight blush on his cheeks.

[smytherines]

do you think maybe curt values spying so much because he is intensely aware of how much of a role it played in his and owen's relationship ever actually forming? that curt refuses to let go of it, even when owen's pointing a gun at him, because he doesn't know they're doomed for sure until nothing is as it was.

do you think maybe owen wanting to dismantle those systems is the ultimate symbol for his pain and anger and hatred, like how people avoid the spots their ex's used to take them to?

[I don't think I actually answered your question like... at all... but here's a fuckton of headcanon shit I wrote and never finished]

I think those are both accurate. I think for Curt, spying is the one thing he really feels like he is good at. That for a lot of reasons (but especially the ADHD and being gay) he's never going to feel comfortable or happy having a normal life, and by spying he gets to do something extraordinary. He gets to feel like a real important guy doing important work. He gets to feel valuable when so many people in his life have either said or implied that he has no value.

And that's before he even meets Owen. I think he really adores Owen, and maybe puts him on a pedestal a little bit (but also resents him for it). Owen is better at certain parts of the job- the planning, the stealth, the tactical and technological side of things. He has the things Curt lacks (and vice versa- that part is important). Together they are unstoppable.

Owen impresses Curt, and very few people actually manage to impress him because his RSD makes him maybe a bit too competitive sometimes- if he isn't the best then he must be the worst. So Curt wants to impress Owen too. He wants to not feel insecure in comparison. He sees this guy who is so good at the job and really fucking attractive and it makes him want to be better. To be clear, I'm not saying Owen is actually better, but that Curt's insecurity makes him constantly doubt himself in comparison (relatable).

So once they actually get together, that collaboration + competition element they've had going for however long they were Just Partners (maybe a couple of years) is still kinda there. It's still an element. He already got his sense of self-worth from the job, but now so much of it comes from how Owen sees him in the job.

I think there's also an element of... I dunno, this is some high gender headcanoning and definitely not in the purview of your question, but one thing I think about a lot is skinny autistic nerd Owen who has never done a sport in his goddamn life, thinking of Curt as a super masculine guy? And Curt feeling more masculine around Owen, because growing up people sorta clocked Curt as having some stereotypically feminine traits, which gave him a very fragile sense of his own masculinity. But when he's with someone he's comfortable with, and eventually someone he loves and trusts enough to know his secret, he feels a lot more confident in himself? Even if sometimes it is macho posturing, Owen loves him so maybe he is the right type of guy after all.

Maybe that's why his RSD becomes such a big issue in A1P1, because it feels like everyone is criticizing him at once and it just triggers that crisis for him, and he gets more ridiculous and cocky and becomes more of a daredevil the longer A1P1 goes on- he's trying to prove himself.

Ok enough of me getting distracted, back to the question- he knows that spying is the reason they met, the reason they got together, so its gone from being the thing he's good at to his entire world- when he's on the job he gets to feel good about himself AND he gets to see Owen. The only person who really knows who he is, and doesn't just accept him, but adores him.

I think that's why Curt convinces himself that Owen would want him to go back to the job- because that's where they were together. That's where they met. Their secret was only able to exist in that secret space- in hotels rooms and cars and abandoned buildings on missions. That if Curt can't have Owen anymore, at least he can maybe find comfort in the things they used to do together. He can get some small part of his self-confidence back.

I think for Owen, there is definitely an element of wanting to destroy any reminders of his relationship with Curt. We know so little about Owen canonically, so a lot of questions about his motivations are headcanon territory. So I can only say what I think here.

For me, Owen was accustomed to violence from a young age. We don't have a birthdate for him, but I picture him as *just slightly* too young to have served in WWII. I put him as born in 1928, making him 17 at the end of the war. In any case, if TCB was being sincere when they called London "Owen's hometown," he for sure lived through the Blitz. He saw his city being torn up, bombed, people leaving to fight a war and never coming home. Maybe sheltered in tube stations overnight, depending on his social class. And this would've happened for several formative years. WWII was a much more harrowing event for civilians in the UK than it was for civilians in the US.

So what does that have to do with spying? Well, I think it makes Owen more cautious, maybe more anxious for control over every little thing, he focuses his energy on making sure they avoid scenarios, and trusts Curt- who is good at creative problem solving and quick thinking and brawling- to take care of getting them out of trouble.

But, to me, growing up during WWII also instills in him this hatred of fascism (stick with me, I know that probably seems weird). I think he's less motivated by patriotism than Curt is, and more motivated by really fucking hating the people who made his childhood so difficult, who hurt so many people. And that motivation gets him through his first few years in MI6- he's one of the good guys. He's doing good things and punishing bad people.

But things change a lot in the immediate post-war period. He joined up because his side was the good side. But then the Americans via Operation Paperclip and the British via T-Force recruit hundreds of Nazi scientists for work in their respective countries. And the longer he works for MI6, the less he feels like a good guy saving the world. The more he feels like a hired gun killing without question or reason, doing coups, gradually becoming someone he doesn't like or respect, someone who isn't just good at violence but who genuinely enjoys it. The longer he does it the more he starts to have doubts about his job- except by this point his job is how he gets to see the man he loves, so he can't quit.

One very interesting thing about Spies for me is that any time DMA is onstage with BVN, he very clearly despises him. If you want to make your villain unambiguously terrible, having him genuinely align with Nazis is a good way to do that. But that doesn't happen with DMA. He is always either irritated by BVN, or doing an incredibly over the top appeasement (and making faces every time BVN's back is turned). Of the five people we see DMA/Owen kill post-fall, three of them are Nazis. He hates Nazis. Whatever else broke in him after his fall, I think that sort of instinctual memory of being a kid during the Blitz remains.

To be clear, as much as I wish he was, I don't think Owen is some great anti-fascist, anti-capitalist, anti-imperialist fighter. I think post-fall he is motivated by things he hates (the government that controlled his life and put him in that weapons facility and left him for dead), whereas Curt is motivated by a strong emotional response towards things he loves (his naive idealistic idea of America and patriotism and being The Good Guys).

That being said, I do think a strong part of why Owen specifically wants to destroy spying as an institution is partially to erase the thing that brought Curt into his life, partially to make sure Curt can never return to the thing that almost got Owen killed (except Curt returns just slightly too early and ruins that plan), but also that he just genuinely understands the post-war geopolitical situation. That his country and the US and the Russians are fighting proxy wars against each other, that everyone has their finger hovering over the nuclear button, that technology and surveillance are the way of the future. He can't, or simply doesn't want to, rejoin the side he used to fight for. He doesn't want to be part of nations battling each other for supremacy.

But with Chimera he has the opportunity to operate in the shadows. To destroy the system that destroyed him, and to carve out a place of power for himself. To be king of the ashes. To be so powerful that nothing can ever hurt him like that again. As an MI6 agent he had almost no control over any part of his life, and it almost killed him. With Chimera, he gets to be part of making the rules.

Regardless of whether it's true or not, Owen certainly seems to think that he will be the one in charge of Chimera's surveillance system. So either he knows he isn't going to expose himself as a gay man, or maybe he hasn't been with a man since Curt and truly thinks that he no longer has a secret. I could certainly see him being so injured and detached from his own body that he has stopped having intimate relationships with anyone, so he may think that makes him safe even if he doesn't have absolute control.

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

idea, the skeletons but in deltarune as convenience store owners lol

Undertale Sans - He prefers talking with the clients than actually, you know, filling the shelves of his shop, and mopping, and commanding things to make sure there are still things in the shop. There's also a 50/50 chance you find him asleep behind the checkout lol.

Undertale Papyrus - He's losing his mind. Being autistic, maniac and having ADHD make his job a living hell. Between Sans doing nothing, clients putting what they don't want to buy anymore everywhere except where it should be and all those children destroying his perfect can pyramide because they can't resist the temptation... He transformed the broom closet into a safe spot where he can go and just SCREAM when he's having a mental breakdown.

Underswap Sans - He's good at winning the loyalty of his clients with his good energy. He's dancing while cleaning the supplies or mopping the floor, greeting kids with candies and he's really good at tricking people into buying the higher price products because who would suspect his cute face is simply a commercial advantage? He's terribly good at this job.

Underswap Papyrus - One client screamed at him one day and he never wanted to do this job ever again lol. He's fine at home, thanks, bye.

Underfell Sans - He looks at everyone like they're about to steal something and some clients can feel his hot breath on their neck when they're staring a little too much at something. Not on his watch.

Underfell Papyrus - He's very patient and commercial, but when a Karen shows up and starts to scream at him, he becomes sassy and can destroy them with words. He even threw a lady out himself once, and even if he got in trouble, he regrets nothing.

Horrortale Sans - He forgets very often the orders he's supposed to take, or the tasks he's doing. Sometimes he even forgets he's actually owning the shop and is not a client. He can't do the job alone, and he has a small card on his jacket asking the clients to be patient and repeat what they want if he gets distracted. Also, scream at him because he's too slow and you're getting a very pissed off Willow on your back.

Horrortale Papyrus - He can't work standing up for a long time, so he's mostly taking care of the paperwork and keeping an eye on his brother to gently put him back on track when he starts to get confused. He's giving tasks to two other employees because just the two brothers would lead nowhere lol.

Swapfell Sans - He's that guy who will ignore you completely until you say good morning. He's not your frickin slave, be polite or get to hell. He can give really good advice on coffee and will get mad if the client buys some shitty one and disrespects the art of coffee.

Swapfell Papyrus - He doesn't really care and closes his eyes when he notices some kid trying to steal to survive. He makes sure to leave a ton of food behind the shop when Nox is not looking so homeless and poor people serve themselves. He used to be homeless, he knows how hard it can be. He even let them sleep in the shop during cold winter nights as long as they're not trashing the place.

Fellswap Gold Sans - He's very polite and nice, trying to make everyone have a great time and buy (a lot) of his products, but be mean to his brother and you're sending him straight into berserker mode. He has no regret atomizing and sometimes fist-fighting good old Karens if they dare to talk bad to his brother. The shop is not really well noted on Google because of this...

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - He doesn't mind filling the shelves and cleaning, but as soon someone starts talking to him, he's paralyzed with fear and doesn't know how to talk anymore, often going straight to Wine to ask for help. Please leave him alone! He just wants to do his things in a corner, thank you!