so let’s get something straight: if i cover my ears because i cannot stand the sound of someone chewing, im being rude. so i don’t cover my ears and instead end up in tears, and im being dramatic and im an attention seeker. so i move away from whoever it is who is chewing, and im being disrespectful and making that person feel bad, so clearly im a horribly selfish person. so i blast music to drown out the sound of somebody chewing, but its rude to listen to music at the dinner table, so obviously i have no manners and im a horrible person. how can i win this???
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hey this isn’t aimed at anyone in particular but I’m saying it for the record here: if I tell you no, please stop messaging me about fundraisers and mutual aid.
I get enough messages that it’s impossible for me to keep up without devoting at least half an hour each day, when I’m not even on tumblr that long most days. Me having a boundary about this isn’t a moral failing, it’s a lifeboat for me on my own blog.
In my personal life I’m already advocating and donating literally as much as I can spare. This is not me not caring, it’s just me not willing to interact with that on the one place I go online to not interact with irl news and world events for the most part.
I cannot be upset all the time. I cannot be upset everywhere. I cannot use all my emotional and mental energy fielding my own upset from ongoing events. My options are to hold boundaries about this or stop coming online at all.
I’m all for sharing information and signal boosting to reasonable extents, but the scale of it this year is so large and so enduring that it is literally not possible to for me to participate on every account I have. I’ve previously shared links to Gaza eSIM donations and a major hub of verified Go Fund Mes here and elsewhere online. We, the online humans, know how to look those things up ourselves by now. There are many, many people choosing to do advocacy work, and right now, I can’t be one of them.
If you’re extremely upset when I tell you I can’t share/donate right now about a Gaza family or personal fundraiser you ask me to share here, just unfollow and block me. That’s what those buttons are for. Protect your own emotions and energy and get me off your feed instead of staying upset and continuing to engage with online people or content that upsets you.
Please don’t send repeated angry messages based on manufactured purity politics and moral outrage into my messages and inbox when I exercise the right to run my own blog.
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thinking about the way ghost doesn't hesitate to start killing shadows when graves betrays them but soap only takes one hostage
you can almost hear the voice in his head telling him it doesn't have to be this way; they can still talk it out
"i'm calling shepherd"
his first instinct when confronted with betrayal is to play it by the books; to go up the chain and sort it out democratically. that goes against everything we've seen him do; he’s quick to drop his enemies and bucks authority at every chance except for the one time he's confronted with the barrels of his allies' guns
he wants a peaceful resolution; for the first time we've ever seen, he doesn't want violence to be the answer
there has to be another fix, a solution that doesn't end with him killing the same men he's been working with; his friends
nothing's happened yet
it doesn't have to go this way
but ghost has been betrayed before. he knows the way this ends; either with him six feet under or his enemy
he doesn't hesitate
it's only when they knock alejandro out that soap shoots; when they spill the first blood and cross a line they can never come back from
only when ghost orders him to run and he has to cover his retreat
and somewhere along the line, between civilians’ screams and taunting voices, between his shaking breath and ghost steady in his ear, that naivety is stripped away; his trust turned to teeth that he uses to sink into throats of men he'd have given his life for
"be careful who you trust, sergeant; people you know can hurt you the most"
he's learned the price of trust
just like ghost did
but unlike ghost, he has someone to guide him through the aftermath
"good advice, It"
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hi. sharing some late night thoughts. vampirehunter!yuuta and blood-drunk-on-yuuta's-blood!reader. lover boy who falls in love and is so infatuated with reader that he let's them feed until they get more than satisfied. sick love yuuta who is happy to be able to provide for his lil creature of the night. bloody kisses and hungry touches. room for confusing morals and angst too haha. for the plot.
you’ve awoken something in me bc i once had this draft (for somebody else rip) about a vampire hunter who falls in love with vampire reader, and… ok well context and background idk if anybody remembers that plot line on wizards of waverly place when justin became a monster hunter, but then fell in love with juliet and had to lie to the monster hunter society program thing basically because he was breaking the rules and whatever… that is how i imagine this situation would, but it’s yuuta, so obviously… much worse 😇
yuuta became a vampire hunter not because of any traumatic experience with vampires or deep-rooted hatred for them, but solely because he had a sister to provide for and the job paid well, and the monsters in yuuta’s mind and nightmares as a kid were infinitely scarier than any vampire he’s come across. he’s slain a couple before, even gotten rid of a few other monsters for a pretty penny, but when yuuta steps into your territory, it’s the first time he feels like he’s the one being hunted, and the worst part is, the sort of liked feeling like prey.
the first time, he wasn’t actually looking for you. there were reports of disturbances, and naturally, he was hired to rid the area of potential threats. nobody could pinpoint that there was a vampire in the area, but yuuta could feel it, could feel you. he could tell you were different, you had some kind of control over him despite the fact that he’s couldn’t see or hear you, and yet he was drawn to you. in the three weeks of searching the dense area, yuutas seen two werewolves, a mummy, three goblins, and even a snake hybrid, but never you. he felt like you were toying with him, like he was the rabbit hopping fruitlessly to reach a carrot you dangled in front of him, but he liked the ache in his legs, the desperation to be face to face with you turned into an insatiable drive and shameful need to continue to be the object of your focus. he’s shown up to town with enough monsters slain in tow that the people who hired him feel safe, blissfully unaware that you’re lurking nearby. yuuta’s job is finished, and yet, he find himself back on that mountain, searching for you—looking, yearning, because hunting is the wrong word. humans only hunt what they are afraid of, and yuuta does not fear you; he is the one hoping to be found.
when he finally does get to see you, he’s bloody and beaten and half-dead from an encounter with a particularly pesky zombie and you’re the one that saves him. he feels oddly cozy in your overwhelming presence, and he’s disappointed when you let him go—why don’t you kill him? or tortue him? or keep him? doesn’t he owe you his life, aren’t you allowed to take whatever you see fit as payback? he meets you a few more times before you finally take him up on his offer, and yuuta is far too eager to offer his neck to you, and then embarrassed when you bite at his wrist instead—and yet, he’s still aroused; by the feeling of your teeth in his flesh, by being under your command, by being used for your satiation. you become drunk on yuuta’s blood, but he’s been infatuated with you from the start, desperate to be needed and willing to please.
the first time you bite his neck instead of his arm or wrist, he begs with wet eyes to be the only human you feed from, and is far too happy to be kept as yours when you promise him that exclusivity. he likes that you toy with him, that he’s the hunter but you’re not afraid of him; you tell him to keep working as hunter, and he doesn’t understand why, but then you sink your teeth in his flesh while he’s on the phone with supervisors, lying about the presence of a vampire in the area while that same creature is sat in his lap, feeding off of his blood. he promises them to get the job done, vows to follow their word, only to come back to you and that’s when yuuta truly feels the thrill of the hunt—and the longer you know yuuta, the more you take from him, the more he gives, the more he deceives his fellow humans and his begs to be yours, you begin to wonder which of you is more of the monster in this equation.
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