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steddieas-shegoes · 2 years ago

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Chapter 15

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 / Chapter 8 / Chapter 9 / Chapter 10 / Chapter 11 / Chapter 12 / Chapter 13 / Chapter 14

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Steve felt the exhaustion creep in as Eddie held him close, neither of them speaking after Steve agreed to Eddie’s suggestion.

He let himself rest, but couldn’t fall asleep, something tugging at his brain in a way that still made him hesitant to relax completely.

He was safe, Eddie was keeping him safe, but he couldn’t drift off to sleep.

It took Eddie humming a song he vaguely recognized to catch the thought and put it into words.

“How do you know that song?” Steve sat back, staring at Eddie with wide eyes.

“My favorite local band plays it as their encore during shows. Why?”

“Um. Your favorite local band doesn’t happen to be High and Dry, does it?”

Steve felt his heartbeat quicken, getting louder as he thought about what this meant.

“It…is? How do you know them?” Eddie seemed genuinely shocked by the fact that Steve knew them, which was fair, considering they were a punk metal band that only played local venues once in a while.

Steve knew why they did though. Because he knew them. Because he knew the lead singer very well.

“The lead singer is Jonathan. Jonathan Byers.”

Eddie was still not getting it, which was fine, because Steve was now standing up and pacing, his hands moving to explain as much as possible.

“He’s Will’s older brother!” Steve threw his hands up, a huge smile taking over his face, the first one in too long.

“Wait. Jonathan is Will’s brother?”

“Yes!”

“Okay. Um. That’s a nice coincidence, sweetheart. I’m not sure why you’re so excited about it, but maybe we can go to their next show?”

Eddie was looking at him like he’d grown two heads, which was fair, Steve knew he wasn’t making much sense.

“No, you don’t get it!”

“No, I don’t,” Eddie agreed.

Steve placed his hands on Eddie’s cheeks, kissing his nose before he pulled away again. The erratic behavior was probably a bit too much, but he couldn’t contain it.

“So you have a connection to the Byers outside of me!”

It took a moment, but Eddie’s eyes widened and then he stood up, started pacing, too.

“I’ve done some of Jonathan’s tattoos recently. We aren’t like, close, but we talk sometimes. He gave me VIP tickets to a festival they performed at in exchange for a part of his sleeve a few months ago.” Eddie was practically doing laps around Steve now, who was watching with a fond smile as Eddie took what Steve thought of and ran with it. “He’s actually scheduled for next week to get something small done. I could call him and explain everything, maybe he could work with Joyce and Will and the school board to end the investigation early. We could just say I did it as a favor because I know the family!”

Steve nodded, his brain going faster than it ever has.

“I know Joyce and Will will be on my side through everything, especially when they find out I’ve been suspended over this. But if we can take the financial help out of the equation for me, that will most likely let me keep my job.”

Eddie wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist and lifted him, spinning him around in a circle as he laughed. It felt so good to laugh, to feel just a bit of the anxiety and stress fall off his shoulders.

To feel like he had a chance in not losing everything he’d worked so hard for.

—---------------------------

He called Robin a bit later while Eddie was making them lunch. He sat on the counter, watching as Eddie tossed a salad together, frying up some chicken in a pan and mixing together some homemade dressing.

“Steve! Hi! Are you okay?” Robin answered on the first ring, like she’d been holding the phone waiting for his call.

She probably had been, actually.

“Robs, I’m okay. Thanks for taking care of me.”

“What happened? Are you still with Eddie? Do you need me to come over? I can call into my shift, Chrissy already said she’d cover.”

“I’m still with Eddie. He’s making us some lunch. I um, something bad happened at work, something that kinda came out of nowhere, and I just didn’t know what to do. I’m sorry, Robs.”

He hated that she had to see him like that at all, but was grateful she was there. He hated to think what would have happened if he’d been alone at the apartment.

“Did you get fired?”

“Not quite,” Steve gave a brief explanation of what happened, only stopping when Robin started ranting angrily about the system being so broken they couldn’t even provide assistance to a student who needed it. She wasn’t entirely wrong, and he couldn’t help the fond smile on his face as she kept interrupting his story to complain about the principal being a bitch (she wasn’t), and the art teacher knowing he could get in trouble if he brought it up (they may not have known), and “your parents are literally lawyers, sue them,” (which would be his absolute last resort, but still an option).

By the end, Eddie was smirking as he ate his salad next to Steve, just as endeared by Robin’s antics as Steve was.

“So where does this leave you?”

Steve gulped. The hard part of this conversation would be telling Robin about taking Eddie’s offer.

She was fiercely independent, had to be because her parents weren’t made of money. They provided her basic needs as she grew up, but she wanted more, wanted better, and decided the best way to have that was to work her ass off to get there. She worked two jobs through most of college, up until her final semester that she was in now, having to use any free time not at Starbucks on her internship at a museum. The moment Steve explained that Eddie was paying for all of his stuff for the month, she would lose at least a little respect for Steve.

“Wait, you’re suspended without pay for a month?”

Here goes.

“Yes, but I figured out rent and stuff, you don’t have to worry about it. Eddie’s helping.”

Robin was silent for a moment, then two.

“Helping how?”

“I’m gonna move in with him for at least the month, he’s gonna put me to work at his shop, and he’s gonna pay the bills I need covered while I’m out.”

That didn’t sound so bad. Like it was him working for the money, not just getting his bills paid like some kind of sugar baby.

Although, he kind of did feel like one.

And he kind of liked it.

He’d never admit that to Robin though.

“Do you have all this in writing somewhere?”

Eddie was watching Steve’s reaction, not interrupting, giving him the space to have this conversation with his best friend, one that needed to be had even with the discomfort it brought both of them.

“No. I trust him, and I know you won’t, but I’m just asking for you to trust me.”

“Why do you think I won’t trust him?”

Steve glanced between the phone and Eddie, like he didn’t really want to say it in front of Eddie, like it would hurt him.

Eddie just shrugged, silently telling him that he would be fine and understood this was a private conversation that he was already being given special permission to even be listening to.

“Because you’re hesitant about people, especially people I get close to. And this has been kind of a whirlwind. I’m struggling to even grasp what’s happening sometimes, and you know rushing into something like this isn’t like me. It’s terrifying, I’m terrified. But you remember when Nancy and I broke up and you told me that someday someone would show me that I’m worth the future I dreamed about? Eddie is that person. And I think I just have to accept that as unconventional as everything with us has been, it’s what works for us.”

He looked over at Eddie, who was frozen in his chair and staring at him like he wanted to kiss him, undress him, take him apart, right here at the table.

Steve wanted to let him.

Not while Robin was on the phone, though. Maybe not today at all. He still wasn’t feeling quite himself and he knew Eddie wouldn’t actually act on anything as long as he was in this state of limbo.

“You’re sure about this?” She asked, but she already knew he was.

“I’ve never been so sure of anything.”

“Then I’m sure, too.”

“Really?”

“Listen, you’re almost as cautious with people as I am. And Chrissy wouldn’t keep him around if he wasn’t reliable and amazing. And the way he was with you earlier…” Robin sighed. “He’s good for you. You’re good together. At this point, if something happens to you two, I’ll lose any hope that love is real.”

Steve smiled at the phone and then at Eddie, who was smiling back, reaching a hand over the table to cover Steve’s. He squeezed gently, acknowledging that Steve and Robin were both trusting him more than they’d trusted anyone to take care of Steve.

He wouldn’t, couldn’t let them down.

—-------------------------

Steve fell asleep at the table, barely able to finish half his salad before his eyes were drooping. Eddie had been cleaning up in the kitchen, so when he walked back to the dining table to see Steve’s head on the table, eyes closed, he couldn’t help the fond smile on his face.

He leaned down to kiss Steve’s head, then picked him up, holding him carefulling in his arms so that he could carry him to bed.

Steve’s eyes didn’t open, but he nuzzled his face into Eddie’s neck, curled his hand in Eddie’s shirt against his chest.

Eddie smiled to himself as he made his way to their bedroom.

Theirs.

He bit his lip to not cry.

He didn’t say it out loud to anyone, and barely even admitted it to himself, but his entire life had been spent wondering if he’d ever find anything this meaningful. Anything he’d ever had was hookups that barely even lasted a night or shitty relationships based on dynamics that truly didn’t mean anything if you didn’t care about each other.

He never felt like he wanted, needed, to care for someone like this. Not in this way.

He would do anything to keep Steve safe and happy.

He tucked Steve into bed, not worried about any of his clothes right now, more worried that waking him up would upset him, and kissed his forehead.

It was easy to love Steve, even through the hard things.

He thought about what Wayne told him years ago when he had his first bad breakup: “Someday, you’ll find someone who is easy to love, even when things are hard. Someday, you’ll love someone so much, that even the shittiest days of your lives will be better just because they’re there to love you through it.”

He knew Steve was that someone for him, and he just wanted to be that person Steve.

—---------------------------------------

The next week was chaotic. Eddie had to work, and Steve had to pack some more stuff to live with Eddie.

Steve had a scheduled interview with one of the school board officials put in charge of the investigation for the next day, so he needed his best suit and hair products.

Robin was coming by for dinner that night so Steve could unwind with his two favorite people, so Eddie wanted to make sure he had her favorite dinner prepared, despite Steve insisting she didn’t care about things like that.

Eddie managed to get in touch with Jonathan and didn’t even have to explain everything; Will had already called him crying the day before about his favorite guidance counselor. He told Eddie that Will had already met with the principal and someone from the school board explaining his side of things, and Joyce had a meeting that day to do the same. He offered to do whatever was needed to make sure Steve kept his job.

“Man, I will owe you an entire body’s worth of tattoos if you can help us in any way.”

“Nah, you guys did something amazing for Will. I help when I can, but the shows we do don’t pay much by the time we split it, and my job barely covers the bills as it is. The fact you were willing to pay for his application fee means so much to us, dude.”

“It’s nothin’ man, seriously. I saw what he’s capable of. And his art is what brought me and Steve together, so it seems kind of like fate.”

“Yeah, man, maybe. Can you bring Steve to our session? I’d love to meet him, make sure he’s doing okay so Will can calm down a little.”

He agreed, and texted Steve to let him know the plans.

Everything was happening fast, but that seemed to be the usual for them, and Eddie was learning that life in the fast lane might be okay.

—------------------------------

Steve was extra cuddly when he was at home, but they never went further than soft kisses and gentle touches as they curled into each other on the couch or in bed.

Eddie knew neither of them were in the right mindset for more, not until things calmed down for them.

But the evening that Steve came with Eddie to the shop for Jonathan’s session, they both felt a lot of tension. Steve because this was his favorite student’s protective brother, who definitely held a lot more power over the situation than he realized. Eddie because even with Jonathan completely on their side, it may not mean anything.

Steve was charming, though, when he wanted to be. It wasn’t fake, he genuinely cared about Will and the way this all played out, and wanted Jonathan to know he wanted to keep being the best counselor he could be for him.

“Will talks about you all the time. I’d hate to see where he’d be without you, man. Seriously, thank you for everything you’ve done for him.”

Steve wasn’t going to successfully hold back the tears, not without immense effort, so he didn’t. He let them pool, then fall, and smiled at Jonathan to let him know that he was okay, just had a lot of emotions about everything.

Jonathan hugged him hard, patting his back a few times and smiling at Eddie over his shoulder.

“You did the right thing, Steve. No matter what they say, you did what was right, okay? You did good.”

Eddie raised his brows, but Jonathan just shook his head once.

“Sometimes, Will just needs to hear that. I think you and Will are really similar and I don’t want you to worry. He’s applied and they can’t take that away from him. Everyone’s fighting for you, okay?”

“Okay,” Steve sniffed against Jonathan’s shoulder.

When he pulled away, Eddie opened his arms to comfort him for a moment, just long enough for Steve to take some deep breaths and stop shaking.

“Alright! Enough of me crying. You came for a tattoo. I’ll go grab you some water from the fridge, how’s the temperature in here? You want a blanket?”

Eddie couldn’t help but look at him fondly, at his natural caregiver attitude that came out when he felt most comfortable.

“Water would be great, but no blanket. I’m just getting something small today.”

“Oh, can I see?”

Jonathan smiled and held out his phone, showing him a picture of a sketch.

“Will drew that.”

“He did. It’s a memory he had of us when we were little, but instead of doing it in detail, he stuck to line art. Wanted to use it for a school project, but when I said I wanted it tattooed, he kept it at home.”

“It’s amazing. I can tell it’s you guys even with just outlines.”

“He’s just good at capturing feeling in anything he does.”

Steve nodded.

Eddie looked it over and nodded, too.

“You know, if the art thing doesn’t work out, he’s always got a chair here if he wants to be licensed. I could use someone like him in the shop.”

“I’ll let him know,” Jonathan smiled.

The tattoo went quickly, the conversation between them flowing easily about all kinds of things: Will, Jonathan’s band, Joyce, his job.

By the end, Steve had Jonathan’s number, though he reminded him it might be best not to use it until after the investigation, just to be safe.

“Can you just tell Will that I’m proud of him and that no matter what happens, I don’t regret anything? Neither does Eddie. I’ll still support him however I can.”

“Of course, man. You take it easy though. He’d be upset to know how stressed you are,” Jonathan patted his shoulder, then shook Eddie’s hand before he waved and left.

“I don’t know what I’ll do if I get fired,” Steve’s voice shook as he turned to Eddie, who had started cleaning up his area.

“Sweetheart, come here,” Eddie said, setting down the tattoo gun and removing his gloves.

Steve listened.

“Can you do something for me?” Eddie asked softly.

“Yeah, anything.”

“Can you kneel right here? Just for a couple of minutes.” Eddie gestured between his now opened legs at the floor.

The floor was probably cleaner than most people’s kitchen counters with how much he swept, mopped, and sanitized it, but a small part of Steve was still worried about being on the floor.

“What’s your color, sweet boy?”

“Yellow.”

“Sit in my lap and let’s talk about it,” Eddie moved his legs a little closer together and patted his knee. “You’re okay, sweet boy. I want you to be comfortable, always. Why is it yellow?”

“Um. I don’t know.”

“You’ve been on the floor here before on your knees, right?”

“Mhm.”

“Is it just the stress of everything?”

Steve thought about it. He knew that was a small part of it, no matter how much he knew he would probably feel better after. And the floor being dirty was a small part of it, too, but that didn’t bother him before.

“I think it’s something else. I don’t know what, though.”

“That’s okay. We can give it a try anyway if you want, or I can just finish cleaning up and we can go home if you still don’t want to.”

He didn’t want to go home, he wanted to be good. He wanted to try.

“No. I want to. Green. Please.”

His voice was a little shaky, probably not very convincing that he actually did want to try, but Eddie only took a moment to look him over and make a decision.

“On your knees, then, baby girl.”

Steve shivered at the name, never realizing how much being called one thing could send him so close to the edge.

He dropped to his knees, probably a bit too hard going off the vibrations he felt along his knees and shins. But it was a good pain, a reminder that he was gonna be safe with Eddie.

Eddie touched his cheek, leaned in to kiss him softly, before pulling away completely.

“So good for me.”

And then he turned back to his station and continued working.

Steve didn’t know what he’d been expecting, but being ignored wasn’t on the list. Maybe just being touched gently for a few minutes while he calmed down, or being praised until he started to believe the words Eddie said so wholeheartedly. Maybe even being told to rub off on Eddie’s leg.

He whimpered, but Eddie ignored it.

“Sir?” Steve asked, his voice breaking slightly.

“I’m gonna finish up my stuff, sunshine. You can be good.”

But could he? Like this?

The expectation was silently set that he would just sit quietly at Eddie’s feet while he worked, like a dog waiting for its master.

Maybe any other time, he’d be okay with that. But right now, with how low he was feeling, he didn’t like knowing he was below Eddie.

Eddie didn’t seem to catch on, though, too busy trying to clean up his station.

Steve felt tears spring in his eyes, not the kind he liked, not the ones that meant he was going to fly over the edge. More like the ones that meant he was being pushed over the edge with no one to catch him at the bottom.

“Red.”

Eddie immediately dropped what he was doing, his hands pulling Steve off the floor and into his lap, pushing his face into his neck so he was as close to him as possible.

“It’s okay, sweet boy. You did good for me. I’m so proud of you for using your word when you needed to. I love you so much,” Eddie spoke slowly, softly, rubbing his back and arms, touching every inch he could reach without moving him away from his body.

Steve cried silently, a part of him feeling stupid for his reaction, for even having to use his word for something as simple as kneeling.

He was trying to listen to Eddie, soak in the praise despite his failure to be good this time, allow himself to know that deep down, he was still Eddie’s good girl.

“Let’s get you some water and some of the chocolate bar I have in my desk,” Eddie whispered against the side of his head.

“No, don’t go,” Steve wrapped his arms around his neck, his legs around his waist. “No.”

“I’m taking you with me, sweetheart. I’m not leaving you. Not now, not ever.”

The promise was made so easily, like Eddie didn’t even have to consider how much he wanted and needed to stay. Steve let the words wrap around him, warmth spreading through his chest and stomach, down his legs and through his arms, tingles in his head running down his spine.

Words held power. Eddie held power. Steve held power.

“Not leaving you either.”

It felt like nothing when he said it, too quiet, too nervous. But Eddie shivered like he was giving him the secret to life.

“In it forever with you, sweetheart.”

“Want forever with you.”

Eddie pulled his head up so he could kiss him, his tongue licking along his bottom lip and silently asking for entrance that Steve would always, always give.

It was still soft, careful, like Eddie knew if he pushed too much, Steve would collapse.

Eddie was good at this. He was good at reading Steve, good at understanding what he needed more than even Steve did.

Eddie stood up, holding onto Steve with very little effort, and walked them to his office where his mini fridge sat full of water, soda, and Gatorade.

“Water or something else?”

“Can I have orange soda?”

“Of course, sweet thing.”

Eddie leaned over to grab the soda from the fridge and then sat Steve down on his desk to open it for him. As Steve took a few sips, Eddie found his emergency chocolate bar in his desk drawer.

“Twix okay?”

“My favorite,” Steve smiled.

He was starting to feel better, at the same level as Eddie again, and not close to falling anymore.

Eddie opened the Twix and fed him a bite, smiling as he watched him chew and swallow.

“Wanna tell me what was going on in your head, sweetheart?”

Steve took another bite, then a sip of his soda, and kissed Eddie’s chin.

“I think I just felt too low. Like you were better than me and you didn’t even wanna look at me. I know it’s not true, but you just weren’t paying attention to me and with everything going on, I felt like…I dunno. Useless I guess,” Steve shrugged, tried to act like it wasn’t a big deal.

Eddie’s face fell, but he quickly schooled his features back to a soft smile, kissing Steve’s lips softly.

“I’m so sorry I made you feel that way, sunshine. You mean everything to me and I certainly don’t think you’re useless. I would never think that.” Eddie ran his hands through Steve’s hair slowly, keeping him calm as he spoke. “I should have thought about how you’d feel. You know I love you more than anything, right?”

Steve nodded.

“Do you need to talk about anything?”

Steve knew he did, but he wanted to be in the comfort of their bed, Eddie’s arms keeping him safe and warm.

Before he could answer, his phone started buzzing in his pocket.

With everything going on, he was hesitant to ignore any phone calls, never knowing when someone from the school board would call. He quickly pulled his phone out, relaxing a bit when he saw it was Robin.

“Hey, Robs.”

“Steve.”

Her voice was quiet, like she was trying not to be overheard. She was home alone, though, a rare day off being used to relax and ignore the world.

“What’s wrong?” Steve pushed Eddie away gently so he could stand up, already trying to focus so he could find his keys. He’d driven them to the shop today in case he had to leave for any reason, and he’d never been so appreciative of his past self as he was now.

“Your mother is here.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that your mother is standing in our living room, complaining about the fort of blankets I was living in on the couch, and asking for you.”

Steve felt his body go cold, his legs only keeping him upright because Eddie was standing right next to him supporting his weight.

When did he get there?

“Is that Steven on the phone?” His mom asked in the background. “Why is his stuff gone from his room? It looks like he doesn’t even live here.”

“Put her on, Robs,” Steve said, voice lacking any enthusiasm over having to talk with his mom suddenly, without preparation.

There was a small sound of the phone shifting between hands, then his mom clearing her throat.

“Steven, will you be home soon? Robin seems to be unwell. She’s living on the couch,” his mother was more tolerable than his father, but her snooty tone wasn’t really welcome at this point, especially not when the judgment was being aimed mostly at Robin.

“Why are you at the apartment?”

“I heard about your job. Your father told me that I should leave it alone since you clearly didn’t want our help with anything, but he’s quite an asshole, and I’m not.”

Steve smirked, though he’d never admit it to her. He knew she didn’t actually like his dad, it was just too much of a hassle to go through a lengthy divorce and divide assets. He was almost certain they both saw other people at this point, yet they were still miserable.

“There’s not much to do about it. The investigation has to happen first.”

“Which is probably unlawful at this point.”

He could hear the eyeroll in her voice. Eddie’s eyes were watching him as he responded.

“What do you mean unlawful?”

“Well, the Byers boy, Will, gave permission for Eddie to be there. It’s not your money that was used. Interviews were already conducted with multiple parties confirming that story. They’re withholding pay from you that was earned before your suspension started, which is its own lawsuit, really. In fact, I’m certain one phone call to the school board would have you back in your office by tomorrow morning,” she stated seriously, though he could almost hear the start of a smile in her voice.

“But I did technically break confidentiality.”

“Which would be damn near impossible to prove without camera footage of the entire interaction, which isn’t possible, especially since all parties involved have the same story about having permission to do so.”

“But he’s a minor, he can’t give verbal permission.”

“Steven, do you really think I have earned millions of dollars as a lawyer by being an idiot?”

Steve sighed.

His parents were smart, much smarter than he would ever be, and that’s why he always felt so inferior to them and their expectations of him. They had successful careers, wealth, and good looks, even with their older age. They hadn’t been good parents, neglectful was the term his first therapist used, manipulative and downright abusive was thrown around by his second therapist. But they did show up when he needed them most, or at least, his mom did.

She was showing up now.

Maybe he just had to let her do it. Maybe she needed this distraction after her diagnosis.

Maybe this could provide some healing for Steve.

“What can you do?”

“I need to know where you’ve up and moved to.”

“I’m living with Eddie for the month, maybe longer.”

“Eddie?”

“My boyfriend.”

Eddie was smiling at him, running his thumb along his hip to keep him relaxed.

“When did this happen?”

“Uh.”

“Oh, good Lord, Steven. I’m not going to bite his head off.”

“Last week.”

“You moved in last week?”

“Uh. No. He became my boyfriend last week?”

He was met with silence. It wasn’t often he shocked his mom into silence; She’d always been able to come up with some kind of response.

“Text me his address. We have a lot to discuss.”

The call ended, and Steve looked at Eddie.

“How do you feel about meeting my mom?”

Chapter 16

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