#and the other professors are so mean like they literally ranted to me about how another professor cursed them out

[writterings]

me with my 18 year old students that i teach at a college

[dfwbwfbbwfbwf]

What's the deal with the Sun?

If you haven't read my rant on Narþil, I recommend it, because it explains how vowel and consonant length effect the meaning of words in Quenya. Link here:

So Iþil is moon and comes from the root Þil which means a white light.

Anar looks similar to nár which means fire, so it would make sense if it was in reference to that, right? But it should be Anár then.

Except here. Quoth the Eldamo!

Okay, so since the nár is in the last syllable of Anar, then that makes sense for it to be a shortened vowel.

Anárion. That makes sense. It isn't the last syllable, so it should be nár.

Narya. ... Wait.

Narvinyë. ... Hold on.

Narmancil. ... Tolkien.

Anardil. ... Professor, you had a rule.

Anarcalin. ... Mr Professor Tolkien, we had a deal!

--- One mental breakdown later ---

So, after conferring with the Council (*cough me and some people on a Silm Minecraft discord cough*), we concluded that this was a rule that Tolkien either established very early and forgot about, established late after he wrote a bunch of stuff, or Christopher forgot to put the accent thing on. :/

I also came to the conclusion that it would be Nárþil, in order to follow the rule. But I still maintain that it doesn't mean "red and white flame".

There is no reference to red. At most, I would translate it to white light flame. (Nár means fire/flame, þil means white light.) But I believe that would be thinking a doughnut is an almond (a nut) made of dough. It's more literal than intended. Why would I think that? Point 2.

There are references on Nárþil to both the Sun and Moon. I still believe it is a portmanteau of the two, Anar and Iþil.

Also, the root SIL has two meanings now: "gleam" and "white light", since the þ to s shift turned the root ÞIL into SIL as well.

Edit:

Upon further reflection, I think that it can literally mean "red and white flame" and be a reference to Anar and Iþil. But it's still Nárþil.

[goldenwoods]

I don't want to beat the dead horse of 'Harry Potter's depiction of enslaved house elves is disgusting' but...I simply can't help myself. It still leaves a bad taste in my mouth, and I made this account to rant, after all.

So, I knew that Harry Potter never solved systemic slavery, nor even condemned it as a system. Treating house elves badly was a big no, but enslaving them in general? Debatable to say the least, says the narrative. But a recent conversation with a friend made me remember some details about just how bad it was.

First of all, though the freeing of elves via socks is a repeated element, information regarding how house elves are enslaved (or indeed, how they are born) are never shown. It's some nebulous 'bound by magic' thing and George said they come with old manors (huh?). The narrative deliberately presents all of them in an already enslaved state. Enslavement is, in the Harry Potter universe, the natural state of elves while freedom on the other hand is something that requires an external 'act', something unnatural. Elves are not shown to naturally possess autonomy which is thereafter systematically deprived, rather, they are born as part of a wizard family's property. This is pretty disturbing and sets the foundation for the narrative's whole "slavery is okay because house elves like it!' thing.

The second problem is Harry Potter himself. Harry is infuriatingly passive in front of disgusting acts of slavery. And it's not because he's a shy or apathetic character. Harry will stand up for people, is quite rash about it in fact, and even at his calmest will issue an appropriately scathing remark. But when Winky, someone who's whole kind has been enslaved and abused for who knows how long, sprouts of stuff she's been conditioned to believe like 'we're not paid, and Dobby wanting to be is unbecoming', or 'we're not supposed to have fun' or 'we do what we're told', Harry doesn't tell her 'No? You are entitled to individual autonomy, enslaving you is wrong.' but he's just like 'eh.....Dobby's cool, let him live his life.' and when Hermione complained about their oppression, the book states, literally, "Harry shook his head and applied himself to his scrambled eggs." and "True, both [Harry and Ron] had paid two Sickles for a S.P.E.W. badge, but they had only done it to keep her quiet." and regarding a professor using house elves to test for poison, Harry simply thought 'welp, guess Hermione's gonna be pissed about that, better not mention it'. (???) What the hell is going on with the good guys here, Rowling? Is this the approved attitude towards slavery?

Thirdly, of course, is the whole 'house elves love being enslaved' thing. Which...silly me for thinking Rowling was trying to critique systemic oppression...and not trying to shove it under the rug after using one poor oppressed elf to characterise bad guy Lucius. I mean, Hagrid's reasoning as to why we shouldn't free elves is absurd, he explains that it's 'in their nature to look after humans, that's what they like', they'd be unhappy to have their work taken away, and they'd be insulted if they got paid. Which is, first of all, a demonstrably untrue statement, because Dobby loved being paid. ('in their nature' generalisations proven to be inaccurate? What a shock!) But even putting that aside, how does this translate to slavery? You could...I don't know, free them and let them voluntarily be cooks, cleaners, servants, whatever, instead of keeping them under a 'magical bound' that makes coerced self-harm possible. They can...take care of you and be your servants if they really want to without being your property. What the hell.

Last but not least is how the only time the narrative made Ron Weasley ('good guy' who's exasperated by Hermione's house elves movement) openly consider the well-beings of house elves is when they wanted to set up Ron and Hermione's big romantic kiss. There's something so gross about Rowling trying to finalise her haphazardly-written romance with her poorly-written slaves, a group that she had, in the last few books, already mercilessly exploited for "comedy" via Hermione's unsuccessful activism. And it's...not even that significant. Ron: 'Hey, don't you think we shouldn't trap enslaved elves in a sieged castle that's about to become a death pit?' Hermione, and the narrative by extension: 'You're amazing, Ron! For showing them basic decency!' *aggressive kissing ensues*

And then Rowling made a whole crowd of house elves (along with a bunch of other systemically oppressed races that she couldn't bother writing properly) rush into battle on Harry/Hogwarts' behalf because wow, isn't he benevolent towards the enslaved? They love him! Like...no, Rowling, you didn't earn the 'all races unite' moment, rather you screwed it over so badly that your feel-good climax presents a picture of slaves rushing to defend their masters, who, I might add, just kind of forgot about them and decided that establishing nuclear families with a bunch of kids and no evil baddie anymore means 'all is well', systemic issues be damned.

[skzwhoree]

"Yearn For Me"

Hello guys!!! My last Toji fanfic received loads of love, so I decided to write another anime fanfic.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Yearn for Me”

Starring : y/n and Gojou Saturo

Description: Gojou is the Model student in y/n’s University. When y/n miserably fails all her classes, she seeks for help from her senior Gojou Saturo who is popularly known as the “Dream Scholar”, Gojou accepts her request but on a rather… spicy condition.

Genre- Smut

Content Summary-  Sub!reader, dom!Gojou, University!au, praising, Overstimulation

word count: 1.7k

THE FOLLOWING IS NSFW CONTENT, VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This has been a recent fake scenario, and its eating my head, HELPP.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Not this again! I could’ve sworn I was gonna ace this paper!” but you did not.

Failing in an English paper has got to be one of the most embarrassing moments of your life, what was that all-nighter for? (you literally chatted with your friends online all night)

You teacher on the other hand was not very helpful was he? “y/n this is sickening, are you really trying to improve, because if this is your best, I would rather not see your worst.” It was a dead end. “I will not tolerate any more E’s from you, its either you pass my class or leave it” Dead. End.

The next day…

“Mina-chan, i suppose this is the end for me, this is the part where I sacrifice myself to the gods!” the entire cafeteria is staring at you as you bang your head on the snack table. “y/n you’re so dramatic, why don’t you take extra classes or something, save me from all your rants.” “Mina-chan so rude.” “or like ask a senior to help you out with the assignments”

“Mina-chan don’t you know all our seniors are stoners, all they know is how to smoke weed like a pro.” “Not all of them…” what does she mean by ‘not all of them’, the first thing you smell the second you enter a Year 3’s classroom is cannabis. “Gojou-san is a straight A student.”   That’s a new name.

“Who’s Gojou?” you ask Mina and her face is in complete shock. She even goes as far as to call you a mummy from the Egyptian era to not know who Gojou is. “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? GOJOU IS THE EPITOME OF BEAUTY.” Who is this Gojou and why is mina going crazy about him, and if he was that beautiful and shiny and glamorous, why haven’t you seen him yet?

“Because he’s too intelligent to attend the lectures, he doesn’t come to the university often. But when he does.. it’s a sight to see” “Mina- Chan you’re so dumb, if he doesn’t come to the uni often, how will I ask him to tutor me?”

Well lucky for you. He was at the university that day, just came to submit some assignment in person because the professor insisted.

 “Y/N !!! is this your luck?? There he is!”

And wow. He was a tall man, broad shoulders, blue eyes covered with his transparent spec’s glass frame, white hair held back with a black band. His aura was magnetic, you felt pulled to him. But it wasn’t easy to just walk up to him and mention your request.

Because, wherever he went, women surrounded him. It was as if he was a celebrity, they clicked pictures with him and talked to him formally. He didn’t seem to be bothered, in fact he acted as if it was a normal occurrence for him.

But you were desperate and if to pass and get an A in your classes meant that you had to walk up to him and ask him to tutor you. You were going to do it.

“Excuse me Gojou-san!” Gojou turned as soon as he heard you call him. “Gojou-san?” he thought.

“Umm can I ask why you were running towards me with that manic look on your face? Do you, by any chance, have any intentions of stabbing me?” he was amused, and his tone was rather slick. Not what you had expected. “N-NO! I – um – I had a request that only you can fulfill.”

He looked confused. Who would not be if you say something so blunt. “Just so you know, I don’t model, so if you’re from an agency, I refuse your offer.” With that he turned the other way and started walking. “What? No! Wait! I’m not from a modeling agency, Humble yourself. I am y/n from Year 2, you’re Gojou-San right?” -who does he think he is- “I think I am?” every word from his mouth was annoying. It was as if he knew he was amazing.

“I’ve heard you’re a straight A student, I’m actually really struggling with my assignments, I was hoping you could help me?” he looked interested immediately, “Sure, I’ll help you, but I take my tution fee in cash only.” Money? Fee? For a broke student like you, does he really think you can pay? “Fee?” you say with a startled tone. “Huh? No money? And you expect me to teach you, what do you think I am, a social worker?”

He started to walk away again, he sighed loudly saying something like “Do I look like a social worker? I think I need to fix my hair.”

 But you were desperate. “Wait! I don’t have money, But I’ll do anything! Please, I really have to pass my class!” He stopped. “Anything huh?”

“What do you mean anything?” he walked closer to you, with a smirk on his face. “umm yeah! I can get you morning coffee everyday, or like cook your favorite food for you, I’m a great cook actually and I could get your clothes dry cleaned for you. You know, like run errands for y-” he stopped you by placing his finger on your lips, “I have servants who do all that for me, how about you meet me in the library for our first class after uni today. I’ll take my payment after that.”

You went back to attend your classes, but something about the way he talked was bugging you. What could he possibly want as payment?

Later that day…

“WHAT?! HE AGGREED TO TUTOR YOU?” Mina yelled at the top of her voice, “SHHHH! Yes he did, we’re gonna study at the library in 5 mins”, And with that you rushed to the library, you didn’t want to be late and ruin your impression. When you reached he was already there, doing something on his phone, others at the library whispered to each other as they looked at him.

You waved to him when he looked at you, and he smirked. As you sat next to him, something that you wouldn’t have thought of in your entire life, happened.

He kissed you.

And the girls went crazy, there was an audible collective loud gasp. He kissed you deep and for once you tried to resist, but he hugged you tight so you couldn’t move. What is he doing? And why ?

After kissing you, He pulled back and started to take out books from his bag. “What? Aren’t you here to study?” you were still too shocked to utter a word. “Are you shocked? Well, don’t be. This is how you’re gonna pay me. That kiss was an advance, I’ll take the rest of the payment for today after we finish.” This? Payment? “WHAT!” you yell in the lowest pitch you can “WHAT DO YOU MEAN, IF THIS WAS THE ADVANCE WHAT IS YOUR FULL PAYMENT?” you say, still in a whisper yell.

“don’t you get it? y/n, I want to fuck you.”

No way. “Wait! I can’t do that!” you were stunned and a little annoyed by his confidence. Who does he think he is, you can’t just let him fuck you. “well then, no lessons for you, can’t believe I wasted my time for this.” And just as he got up he said, “You know, after that kiss, no woman in this room is going to spare you. Too bad.” You look around to see girls looking at you furiously, after all you had just kissed the man of their dreams.

Fuck. Dead End.

Now you were forced to take lessons from him. “No WAIT!” he smirks yet again, “Changed ya mind?” he says as he turns towards you. fuck. This isn’t good.

He sits back down and continues to take the lesson he promised. Surprisingly he was a great teacher. You could tell he put in the effort. But the payment kept bugging you.

After the lesson, he stretched a little and waited for you to pack up your bag. He grabbed you by your wrist and pulled you towards him, just to whisper in your ear, “don’t be scared, this’ll be a deal to remember. I’ll make sure you remember.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You pant as Gojou surrounds you in his embrace. You’re skin to skin, his length fills you up deep, the windows of his car fog up. Gojou plants little kisses on your neck as you ride him in a slow pace. “Can’t go on, m tired!” Gojou rests back his head as he says, “I like seeing you troubled, want me to help you sweetheart?” another smirk on his face. “yess, please Gojou-san!” you beg, you couldn’t have wanted anything else than gojou to help you, the slow pace was killing you, your thighs were tired. “let Gojou help her little slutty new student” he says as he quickly has you laid on the car seat.

“c’mon, don’t go quiet on me, beg.”

“Please Gojou-San, fuck me, fuck me!” he thrusts into you once, it was a hard deep thrust, “please Gojou!” Another Thrust, and as you beg him like a prayer, he fucks into your hole hard. Your wallas squeeze him tight and he grunts into your ears.

Gojou bites your ears softly, then the back of your neck, your back, your shoulders. He says “I’ve never met someone who feels so good on my dick before” “its like you were made for me to ruin you” Gojou tugs on your hair, as he cums inside of you, his fluids mix with yours as you cum with him, your hole leaks and wets his car seats. Gojou falls onto you, his heaviness acting as a sense of comfort on your body.

And just as you thought it was over.

He thrusts into you again. “Gojou-San! Can’t take anymore!”

“What? Did you think my lessons were that cheap? I’m gonna go on till I fuck with your head”

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA that was it GUYS! Lmk if you want a part 2! BYE.

[alovesongtheywrote]

hiii girlie!! it’s my birthday HAHA can i please get a nightmare academia part?? thank youuu 🫶

♥ Summary: SORRY I MISSED YOUR BIRTHDAY!! iirc, i got this like. right in the middle of finals season. i am so sorry :( to compensate, i have provided a holiday update!! In this chapter of Nightmare Academia, it's the holiday season and Reid pulls a lil prank.

♥ Warnings: holidays, Wham's Last Christmas

♥ A/N: this is really just a holiday blurb im ngl. happy holiday special ig!! (also. i didn't edit this. my bad lol)

♥ Word Count: 600

Series Masterlist

♥♥♥

The winter seasons were always an interesting time to be a professor.  The campus was decorated with trees and lights.  Fliers advertised Hanukkah and Christmas gatherings.  The students were so stressed and burnt out that they moved through life with a weird sort of festive calm. 

This year, that festive calm had taken on a new feature- your students wouldn’t stop playing Wham’s Last Christmas.  

You had nothing against the song.  All things considered, you liked Wham.  You liked Last Christmas.  It just got a touch annoying when the song played on a constant loop through various shitty phone speakers.  All the time.  Every day.

You weren’t sure what caused it- what earthly force could convince a bunch of college kids to listen to that infernal song so frequently?  What could get them to set Last Christmas to their ringtones?  You were pretty sure most of them hadn’t used ringtones before December.  To put it bluntly- you were confused, tired, and suspicious.  You were also ready to scream.

So you did!

“Holy shit, if I have to hear that fucking song again, I might literally explode.”

Reid looked up at you as you burst into your shared office.  His eyes were wide, as if your pre-loaded rant about Wham’s Last Christmas had caught him off guard.  

If it had, that was honestly on him.  You were only about a week into December, and you had already complained about the thing seventy-six times and counting.  If Spencer didn’t remember that, then his special boy memory powers had clearly failed him.

“Well, you wouldn’t literally explode,” Reid corrected, clearly recovered from his shock, “That’s a common mistake.  You would actually-”

“Reid, stop it before I feed you to the ghost of George Michael.”

He held up his hands in surrender, though a smile played across his lips.  You glared at that little grin as vines of suspicion tangled with the fleshy meat of your brain.

“Did you have something to do with this?”

“Whatever do you mean, Doctor?”

“I mean,” you slammed your hands down on Reid’s desk, “Are you the reason I cannot escape that fucking song?”

He leaned back in his chair, weaving his long, slender fingers together like some fucking anime villain, “And how would I pull that off?”

“Easily.  You’re you, and it’s the perfect crime.  All it would take is the promise of extra credit, and your students would do anything.  You think I haven’t noticed that the student body suddenly loves playing Wham?  Out loud?  Without headphones?”

Spencer’s grin got bigger, “Wow.  I’m sorry that your students have been using technology in a distracting and upsetting manner.  I can’t imagine what that’s like.”

“Spencer Reid, I am going to kill you.  I’m gonna choke you out with Christmas lights.  Seriously.”

He leaned in, “Are you literally going to kill me?”

“Fuck you, Reid.”

“I’d like to see you try.”

You snorted out a laugh, “You wouldn’t survive me, pretty boy.  Now, have you seen the essays my cybercrime class wrote?  They were on my desk.”

“Here-” he said, reaching for one of the desk’s many drawers.  That ended the conversation as the topic drifted to your students and the general category of crime that involved techy-whecy bullshit.  

In the weeks that followed, the volume on Spencer’s prank was turned down.  The students played it less and less, and the campus generally hummed with other holiday themed music until the break hit.  The day after it did, a package arrived on your doorstep.

A lovely vinyl copy of Wham’s Last Christmas.  

You were gonna kill Spencer Reid.

♥ Tags: @icarusignite, @usuallyunlikelyfox, @maraudersforlife2005, @fictionalcomforts, @morgthemagpie, @iiheartbowie, @digitalhearts, @corpsebridenightamare, @ghostatrixx, @reiding-writing, @mywellspringoflife, @80katie, @ms-ks-world, @currentfications, @ilse235, @emagen, @foolishwaitersblog if you asked to be tagged and i forgot, pls let me know!! if you would like to be tagged and aren't, also let me know :D

[midnight-light]

Pokemon Scarlet and Violet Characters AGAIN~!

So I decided to do ANOTHER character post, because I played through the DLC's not that long ago, so let's just dive right into this shall we~? (Pokemon Scarlet and Violet's; Teal Mask and Indigo Disk Spoilers ahead! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.) Starting with my new favourite character~! (Sorry not sorry Arven!) KIERAN

Where do I start???

Upon first meeting him, my inital impression was; 'Aww, adorable wet cat boi! He needs a hug!

Throughout the course of teal mask I began to feel REALLY bad because well...

How dare the game make me lie to that face-

I went into the DLC's practically blind, so his change in personality, while I saw it building up in Teal mask, still got me HELLA off guard in Indigo disk.

Like DAMN boi!

I personally really liked the idea of the theory of the toxic chain (Though I know it was not what actually happened in the game) twisting Kieran's desires, that might just be me though.

For those who might be curious...yes, yes I did use Ogrepon against Kieran.

The fact that he was so desperate to beat Juliana/Florian (Player Character) That he used a master ball to catch terapagos and then recklessly used the pokemon that he barely knew anything about... said something

I liked the overall character arc for Kieran (though I wish I could have given him a hug at the end when he apologized)

Definitely throwing him onto the therapy bandwagon with Arven though.

CARMINE

Moving on to Carmine, I...had a mixed first impression of her.

She agitated me at first, but I knew i was only looking at the surface so I didn't want to jump to conclusions

and damn was I glad that I didn't, she proved to be an enjoyable character.

She started to win me over when Kieran tells the player character, "Actually, she was tearin' the shed apart, trying to find a third mask for you before you got there..."

That finally tipped my dense brain off that she's not all mean and that she does care, just doesn't exactly show it in front of others.

she completely won me over when she told me I could sucker punch Drayton (I love him but sometimes I stg-)

When she was genuinely showing worry for her brother during Indigo disk I just kinda sat their like; "I did this, and I'm sad that I did this." regretti spaghetti was hitting hard.

She also paid witness to Kieran nearly DYING near the end of indigo disk, not to mention helping with battling terapagos... and so...

*Yeets her into the Therapy Wagon* That makes the therapy count four now. (I never mentioned this in my previous character posts but Arven and Penny are ALSO in the therapy bandwagon) Whose next?!

DRAYTON

This guy

THIS GUY.

Don't get me wrong, I love him as a character

But sometimes, SOMETIMES, I want to punch him.

For me at least, he's like the older sibling that LOVES to annoy the hell out of his younger siblings.

but I wont lie I was definitely giggling a bit under my breath when he swaggered up to Kieran and called him "Ex Champion"

It was like he'd been WAITING to say that in revenge for when Kieran beat him and dethroned him from his champion spot.

He is cunning and I love that to bits.

he knew EXACTLY what he was doing when he dragged you into joining the league club and getting you to challenge the elite 4 + Kieran.

"I've got a feeling you're trying to play puppet master." He was not just trying, he was playing puppet master rather successfully.

BRIAR

This may turn into a rant but here we go regardless!

At first, I thought; ah a professor, surely she must be pretty responsible!

and yeah at first she was decently responsible for the students she was in charge of.

Then I started getting near the end of indigo disk

Madam, I know that Kieran is a strong trainer, but also, let him mentally spiral in peace.

Also the fact that Kieran literally says this; "Ms.Briar can be so reckless sometimes... I feel like I always have to keep an eye on her."

Okay, mild concern is officially rising.

'Terrastrialize Terapagos' she says, Ah yes, let's terrastrialize this pokemon that was only JUST caught and we know nothing about, that's totally safe!

Now we're BOTH to blame for Kieran and Carmine requiring therapy!

Despite this I don't hate her

but GodDAMN she nearly gave me a stroke-

[silvertws]

PETRO WAS CRYING AND I WAS CRYING OMFG.

SABRE WHY.

WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO US.

Nah.

Nah.

Bro better pull a fucking 180 on that freaking little fairy-blue thing BECAUSE HELL NAH, HELL TO HELL TO THE NAH.

Leave the boys alone bish.

I'm too attached to them.

I cannot.

I CANNOT HANDLE ANOTHER APO-OWEN SITUATION OK?!!!

I think I would simply perish.

Gone.

Just like that.

Poof!

I hate how attached I am to the silly Minecraft guys.

BUT MY BRAIN... THE PARASITE... THE DEMON IN MY BRAIN WANTS TO LIKE THE SILLY MINECRAFT GUYS...

I need someone as unhinged as me to talk about the sillies, for my own sanity.

Which is, barely there honestly, but that's besides the point.

I believe in redemption arcs PETRO PLEASE, PLEASE YOU CAN STILL FIX THIS.

Please, I just want them to all be happy, I'm sobbing.

ncjekwlalls PLEASE.

Let the fellas be happy.

Like, I usually don't ship characters ok? After Origins I just don't.

But tbh platonically??? Hell yeah, let the fellas be wholesome, no kissing no nothing, just hugging, telling each other sweet things- I will literally be kicking my feet like a little kid.

Also, on a side note.

Ruined Reality rants and theories up ahead.

Heyyyyy guys how are we feeling about the Newest Ruined Reality episode??? Yeah all good? Just doing a check in on all of us.

I mean, yeah, as expected.

Also, alright, this is gonna become a slight theory moment.

Rainbow crystal + heart of the soulstice?

You know how the rainbow crystal is made with the energy of the chromatics?

Yeah well, if the rainbow crystal still works, which I'm led to believe , fusing that energy with the heart, could potentially... Either give life back to the chromatics... Or... Create new chromatics but using the older souls, kinda like reincarnation.

ALSO AH, MY THEORIES WERE KINDA CORRECT HELL YEAH.

Mf First Curse better not bother Light smh Balance, go punch him, you literally can, since you belong in the same omniverse-? So go and punch him thank you very much.

Anyway.

I seriously do not know if Light will be able to bring everyone back.

If he manages to bring Steves back, it's definitely not gonna be everyone.

Not only because a lot of bodies were destroyed, but also for a storytelling factor.

Which is why all of them staying dead is a bittersweet victory, sure, you did it Light, good job! Every Steve who's left is now safe from that! Except... Well, the last Steve kingdom kinda... Doesn't like you. So I don't know if you're going to be allowed there...

Oh, so living with the professor? Yeah sure, if you want to have another metal rod in your leg you can.

Living with Ellie and uh... Cassian....?(I am so bad with names omg) in their little magic thing?

Yeah sure.

Go on.

They already adopted you my good sir, come on, they saw you and were like "yes, this one, ours now, yoink"

Also NCIEKSKSLLSLK PROXIMA.

Proxima the GOAT.

The FUCKING GOAT.

Even in death, EVEN IN DEATH BRO WAS STILL THE GOAT.

Another possibility.

TFC: "yo Light, sup"

Light "gtfo"

TFC "No u"

And then Light gets sent to ANOTHER UNIVERSE Just to suffer AGAIN.

Because remember kids.... TFC cursed Light to suffer FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER AND- yeah you get the gist of it.

So what happens when there's nothing more to make him suffer with in one universe...?

That's right... You send him to another one so he has to start all over again... And again.. and again...

BUT BIT BUT

I find this very unlikely because the reset trope is kinda overused and annoying and I also believe it would take out from the whole experience.

Like on a long run, it makes sense that TFC would do that.

BUT THIS IS A MINECRAFT ROLEPLAY GUYS.

There's just some things you cannot do or play with enough depth.

So, going back on the main topic.

What happens now?

Well, Light, Seer, Galaxy and To- FUCK THAT MF KILLED SOREN AGAIN I CANNOT.

I CANNOT WITH THIS GUY.

Smh, letting Light go through the loss of Soren not once BUT TWICE.

smh.

Anyway.

Now.

I already tried to explain how I think the rainbow crystal might be tied to "fixing" this.

And I think that's honestly our best bet.

Like, before this episode, I honestly thought they were simply going to yoink it from Lewis and Light was gonna use it.

But apparently they didn't do that...

Also like I'm sorry.

WHY THE FUCK DID THE RAINBOW CRYSTAL, STAY FUSED WITH LEWIS EVEN IF HE WAS DEAD.

Nah cause like, I always found that, not particularly logical.

Without the energy from the host, the only thing left with energy IS the crystal.

It would have made sense, in that case, if the crystal, its energy, also caused Lewis body to "live" but without actually being Lewis. But pure energy.

How would the crystal stay fused with Lewis?

Does that mean bro still has some energy somehow?

Was it the soul energy that kept them forcibly united?

I'm probably looking too much into it ngl, it's probably another plot hole or simply something that will be explained later... Maybe.

If the rainbow crystal is not going to be used in any way with the heart, I'll be surprised.

It could be like, a rainbow heart or whatever.

It's seriously the only thing I have going on right now.

Because it's the only thing with enough chromatic energy left to actually do something.

Unless SOMEHOW Light goes back to the other Steve Kingdom and Genesis is fucking alive, just like that, randomly, because he can.

I have no idea if any other deities are actually canon in RR.

Is Origin Steve canon? Or any of the other things in Rainbow Quest? Because Seer, Colle, Genesis, are all things from there as we know.

So just how much from that universe also transpired into this one?

Are demon Steves a problem we're going to have to deal with after everything and Seer is finally put to rest?

Also, yes, Seer will die.

I mean, he literally asked to be killed guys, what do you want? I say let him die. Colle is gone, that's enough pain already, I'm not gonna watch Seer becoming Void again (which btw, I think it's already happening or has already happened during the fight and Void is simply playing with everyone as per usual).

Still hoping for a Light corruption/villain arc (more like corrupt) because bro deserves to let out some steam and I support Light in literally everything he will do at this point.

He needs a beach episode fr.

Actually, no.

WE need a beach episode.

... I'm drawing that shit, I'm putting that in my nonexistent list of things I need to draw for my own sanity.

Oh.

Wait.

I completely forgot about the redstone core guys.

I mean, I don't think that's gonna help..? Idk I feel like it's a different energy from the one in the crystal or the heart so... Idk...

But maybe it could still be used for other things???

Also, we could simply get a time skip, to like, months later or something.

It has happened before and I honestly wouldn't mind it.

There's like, the option of going to the last Steve kingdom and asking them for help, but they must have moved by now, sure we can locate them with the assistant I suppose, if it comes down to it.

Also, one thing.

(idk man, some of y'all might find this offensive or call me chronically online for this :/)

Me whenever gay is used mockingly in a Steve-verse story while literally everyone is the same fucking gender as the other and their reproduction is literally based on MAGIC.

Like I'm sorry but make it make sense.

It's probably one of the things that annoys me the most.

I'm not saying that now everyone is forced to accept ships between certain characters.

I'm saying that there are not many sexuality options in a world where there's usually one gender.

You're either, Aromantic or something on that spectrum, Asexual or in that spectrum, Gay because there's literally one gender there to be attracted to.

Unless we're talking about universes that use more.

Or we could bring in the possibility that since they're all Steves or Alexes, they're all canonically non-binary.

I don't give a single fuck about romance, I can live without it.

But it annoys me, when comments are made, that logically speaking, don't make sense.

One of the biggest plot holes in RR until Ellie was introduced, was Cliff talking about women.

Which was resolved when Ellie came through and was like "no yeah, we exist actually, well used to".

Which again creates another plot hole to how tf did Cliff even meet one of those if they went extinct.

Disclaimer

I wanna clarify that I love RR and the other Steve verse stories or I wouldn't be talking about them. And that my rants are not directed towards the creators in any way, I do not, nor cannot, dictate how they decide to write their stories.

It's their tale to tell, I'm just here to watch, and listen.

I have opinions just like everybody else and if anybody ever takes offense (for some reason) to what I say, suck it up , talk to me like a normal person.

There are opinions to which I'm not willing to change my mind on, but I will still listen to others, just like there's some of which I will probably change my mind on.

As long as you're respectful about it, so will I.

Anyhow, I'm shit at explaining my opinions, because I'm horrible at conversations and English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if I made it look like I was being rude or judgemental.

[aita-blorbos]

(continuation of https://www.tumblr.com/aita-blorbos/744552039046086656/i-25m-am-a-journalist-who-is-looking-into-a)

AITA for technically getting my co-worker killed?

literally not but sure i'll let random strangers judge me for fun. basically I (23M) work for a newspaper. not saying which one. and there was this guy (25M) who worked there. we used to get lunch together a lot and talk and look at puzzles or whatever. then at some point i had to take a month off work because hospital (dont ask) and when i got back, he kept giving me weird stares?? well, he usually did, but it was different somehow. and then without warning he knocked me out and tied me to a chair??? Apparentlyy he thought i killed people with guns for profit. weirdo. guns are very very cool and just because i like guns doesn't mean i kill people with them come on. god forbid a guy like guns and keep 26 replicas in my coat??? maybe it did look a little suspicious, but they're replicas! maybe he should've CHECKED if they were real first. anyways i told him he was stupid for kidnapping me and some other stuff to piss him off, to which his response was STABBING me. rude. like yeah okay fine don't provoke my kidnapper etc etc but else would i do there?? sit there and confess to the murder that i absolutely do not do??? and then he just started ranting about how he secretly hated me the whole time! surprise, every single time he agreed to go get lunch with me is because he wanted info or whatever the hell he was on about! i don't know what he said exactly because i was bleeding out!! >:( so then my weird professor dad came in to pick me up and uh the co-worker guy tripped. very badly. and died. so i GUESS you could say it's my fault he died because i was being a little suspicious by having all those replica guns.

[skitskatdacat63]

Tysm for the tags @monacobasedgirldad @schumigrace @fernandoalonzoo sry im a bit late getting to this lol

Are you named after anyone?

My great great grandmother(I think??), though she was named Katarzyna, and I was born Catherine, but go by Catie obviously(this lowkey annoys my mom lmao, especially bcs if I were to have a nickname, it was supposed to be Cate.)

When was the last time you cried?

Today, over classical music. I think I cry at least once a day 😭 I am very emotional

Do you have kids?

Nope :)

What sports did you play/have you played?

I played soccer when I was a kid. Also does marching band count?

Do you use sarcasm?

All the fucking time, literally constantly. And also we sarcastically bully each other in my family, so I have to pull myself back from accidentally insulting people 😭

What is the first thing you notice about people?

Hmmmm, I feel like ive done this tag game before bcs I remember writing this exact answer. But usually I notice if someone is a good conversationalist or not. Like do they like to lead the convo, do they like to listen to the other people, do they talk too much, too little, are they awkward about it? It's just very interesting to me, bcs I think that kinda thing really does instantly show you if you're going to be compatible with a person(as a friend or more etc.) Cause I talk a lot a lot, and I think it's difficult to get along w people who are untalkative but also people who talk an equal amnt if not more djkfkglg.

What is your eye color?

Just brown!

Scary movies or happy endings?

Scary movies definitely. I mean im not opposed to a happy ending obviously, but that's not really what im always looking for in a movie, I guess? Rn I'm trying to think of my top movies, and man, not a lot of them have happy endings 😭 But I literally just watched two horror movies the past wknd so! Even though they make me paranoid

Any talents?

I think I could go on a rant about anything if you gave me a bit of time. I really think I can just talk endlessly. Is that a skill? Or is it just annoying..? But yeah I'm not sure, but I think I'm pretty good at absorbing information and being able to go on and on about it.

Where were you born?

America rahhh 🦅🦅 I like my state a lot even though I feel like all my peers keep saying "ugh I don't want to be in [insert state] anymore" Smh how dare you

What are your hobbies?

Mostly drawing! I draw both F1 fanart(pretty much all selfmade AUs tho) and ocs. I like writing lore and worldbuilding and meta, but not really writing itself. I like reading fic and watching movies as well. And I think one of the main things I do these days tbh is read about history and keep up with politics. I get more and more involved with it as the days go by, but unlike drawing, I don't really have an outlet for it sigh sigh. So that's why a lot of AUs involve history and random other things, bcs its fun to involve my interests with each other!

Do you have any pets?

Yes I do! Two cats and two dogs. The cats are named Jin and Frank. Jin is basically me in cat form, he's so anxious 😭 and Frank is like my brother, he's such a little bastard who loves to hiss all the time. My dogs are named Maisie and Ruby. Maisie is a menace to society, but she is also the most beautiful dog ever, so I forgive her. Her name makes me laugh bcs she's named after this book character, Maisie Dobbs right? So her name tag says Maisie Doggs

How tall are you?

Around 5'4

Favorite subject at school?

Politics >:) But I'm pretty interested in philosophy as well rn. Unfortunately my love for foreign languages has been slipping in the semester or so, bcs my professors on that side kinda suck. So I've been putting more energy into my other major, and now all I can talk about is history, politics and philosophy, etc etc. It's just a lot of fun and very interesting to me!

Dream job?

Man, sometimes I wish I could just be a student forever, I just want to keep learning all about the world and other things. But I'd like a job that's not too static, something that pushes me out into the world a bit, maybe smth in the government or like a non-profit idk yet!

Ahhhh I'm doing this a bit late so I'm not sure who's done it yet, I feel like mostly everyone has :,) I tag anyone who's interested, like seriously I'd love to see people's answers who I haven't yet!!

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Okay me again, hi, I’m at the airport for a not fun trip home and am distracting myself. I have an anecdote or two for you that are just reminding me of Gojo/Rinko prof dynamic.

My dad would get to his college campus before my mom most days (now she just drives him to work all the time lol). He would always end up popping over to her class or building before class began to say hi, love you, have some tea, etc. But if he got there before her, he’d end up gushing to HER students about her and she’d have to kick him out to start class.

He also had an incident where he’d been hospitalized for a surgery and was not supposed to teach for a bit so he could rest. But he LOVES teaching, so he snuck away from home to teach class and my mother had to come to campus to drag him home and back to bed rest. These may not mean much regarding Gojo and Rinko but I love the college prof couple dynamic in every setting and I wanna share cute stories since everyone’s going through it rn 💚

Hi!! I'm sorry that it's a not fun trip home. I hope it goes as well as it can! 💕

OKAY BUT THAT FIRST EXAMPLE WOULD BE GOJO 1000000%.

He'd get there and be like "DO YOU GUYS KNOW HOW FUCKING SMART YOUR PROFESSOR IS??? HAVE YOU SEEN HER RESEARCH? YOU'RE SO FUCKING LUCKY, HOLY SHIT. SHE'S ALSO HOT AF. YOU KNOW, IT TOOK ME OVER A YEAR TO CONVINCE HER TO DATE ME???"

And he's saying all this shit and Rinko just slips into the back and is cackling as he rants and then he finally notices her and just gets this fucking dopey smile on his face as he greets her and literally everyone is rolling their eyes because how can a couple be this fucking cute and in love?

I also have a headcanon where Mai shows up at his class to pass a message and half his students are like "WTF who is that isn't he married" and the other half are like "WTF i thought hot prof was single wait is he dating a student do i have a chance" and Mai is whispering to him and he's getting all agitated, and suddenly he's just like "CLASS IS FUCKING CANCELED BECAUSE MY WIFE WENT INTO LABOR WITHOUT FUCKING TELLING ME BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T WANT TO INTERRUPT MY TEACHING." and he goes to leave, muttering under his breath as he asks Mai if Rinko drove to the hospital herself and he just groans when Mai smirks at him and tells him she took the metro and he's just like "this FUCKING WOMAN IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, AND SHE'S PERFECT, BUT TODAY SHE WAS PERFECTLY STUPID." and Mai is just fucking cackling as she follows him out of the room.

[22degreehalo]

Pulling my hair out........

Whyyyyyyy are people SO DESPERATE to find ways to justify harry potter being an awful book that nobody ever liked. Why is is SO GODDAMN HARD for people to just admit that a bad person could make a good thing!!!! Even a pretty decent thing!!!!! As if millions of people around the world didn't sit down to read over a MILLION WORDS for fucking nothing!!!!!!!!!!

Because I work in a library!!!!!! Harry potter is still so goddamn relevant guys!!!!!!!! We still have harry potter signs up!!!!!! There are still so many kids reading them for the first time!!!!!! Still soooooooooOOOOO many spin-offs and 'wizarding world crochet' and 'the science of Harry Potter' and 'essays on Hogwarts' and literally anything you can think of!!!!!!!! I wore a cheap-ass witch hat and two separate people asked me if it was a 'Hermione hat!'!!!!!!!! And my coworker dressed up as Professor McGonagall!!!!!!! Another coworker has an 'I solemnly swear that I am up to no good' lanyard!!!!!! Hell, my aunt in goddamn America moved in to a new apartment and do you know what event they put on to bring the tenants together? A Harry Potter crafts day!!!!!!!!!!!

Christ all fucking mighty, regardless of how you personally feel about it now (or back then, if you were ~oh so smart~ enough to uhm Acktchually have hated it from day 1), it was a global phenomenon that got millions of kids into reading. Was it in the right place at the right time? Yeah!!!!!! Just like literally anything that becomes a phenomenon!!!!!!! But IT HAPPENED, and *to this day* Harry Potter is a global symbol of reading and wonder and childhood and it's been fucking decades and you simply cannot change that now!!!!!!! You know what people still to this day recommend to people learning new languages? Reading Harry Potter, because it's immediately assumed of everyone that you'll not just be familiar with the story but know all the beats well enough to follow along with the story even when you can't fully understand what you're reading!!!!!!!!!!

Just oh my fucking GOD, I know this is an unhinged rant but I still keep *hoping* that *this time* if I take a peek behind those filtered tags, I might see a post with some vague tangential reference to reality as it pertains to the most popular modern book series of all time, but as always: nope!!!!! God for fucking bid we acknowledge even for a microsecond that Goodness and Beauty are not inextricably intertwined!!! Absolutely anything to justify ourselves as True Of Heart because we, The Good Ones, would never commit such thought crimery as having positive emotions about a work of art whose author later became a transphobe!!! And of course we can't possibly ever praise the work's anticlassism messages oe statements of tolerance or diversity, because that means Saying She's Right About Everything Ever, so we have no choice but to continue this vicious cycle wherein people only ever hear bad things in this goddamn stupid echo chamber and that just becomes the 'objective truth'!!!!!!

God I'm just fucking waiting for when somebody posts some old letters of Tolkein's and suddenly everyone remembers that he was an old white Catholic man who started a lot of the goddamn racial charicatures HP is blamed for and wrote a whole goddamn race of Always Chaotic Evil sentient beings. Where's all that ~hopepunk~ ~ohhh it's about community gathering together (unlike Harry Potter which idk I guess the MC just did everything huh)~~ bullshit going to go then? Not that I think LotR is actually objectively bad, even though I tried to read it and didn't like it and never cared for the movies at all (they're just action movies. They're literally just action movies in a fantasy setting yall I'm glad you guys enjoy them but to me they're pretty goddamn boring 90% of their runtime) because I am a person capable of nuanced thought and acknowledgement of the concept that sometimes other people can find meaning and enjoyment in things that I myself do not without being objectively wrong!!!!!!!!

[enigmasandepiphanies]

I am so scared of writing, like both my advisors love my research proposal and i got my last term results and they are really good like 9.62 cgpa (sorry for number dropping but not sorry i really struggled last trimester and got my first b and i did 5 courses it was hard) and my research thesis is literally on tumblr and irs something ik and love and i love my courses this term and i am reading so much but i am procrastinating writing and i just it's so scary and secondly, I read about how loneliness has become some international health threat and i just I have been really lonely lately fuck kinda just realizing this while typing and i literally had a great time with my friends today two of my fave people got to hung out together and we gossiped on very comfy chairs but idk I think I have been a bit broken since diwali kalesh and just I think my loneliness stems so much from the fact when people tell me i am too much too intense I expect a lot and i just feel stifled and wanna curl back ans hide myself and never ever be me and the thought that i can't be me because people I love sometimes can't take it just fucking kills me and makes me feel weirdly isolated and i love all the people in my life but it's hurting lately idk how to explain I have started to feel like the world would be easier to deal with if I was not me and my best friend is going to the beach with our other friend, the beach that we both planned to go together to someday like in our bucketlist (well it's just me maintaining that list cause I am just a sap like that while she just says it but ik she means it cause we have done that many times) and i was kinda bummed not cause it's the beach cause she forgot it was like our thing maybe it didn't mean to her that much and i didn't tell her I was bummed cause it would ruin her trip and like what's the point (I got literally into the kalesh for being overtly communicative and i am scared and idk what to communicate and what not and it's not like this makes any difference ik i would move on soon) and also she was so excitedly talking about something else and i realized oh maybe I don't give chance to people to talk to cause it's been a while since she fully ranted (I mean like rationally 3 days but i just do that more than her and it feels like she doesnt get to do that much cause I am so excited and talkative and expressive all the time like IDK CAN I STFU) and yeah I am skincared with my fave candle under yellow fairy lights crying and my roomie is with her very cute old school romantic boyfriend and i feel like idk how to be me in a way that's it's palatable and will i ever find a romantic relationship where a person will accept me for being me like the worst parts of me (but the truth is ik they are not worst parts they make me me and that makes them the best parts and idk the most awful thing would be if people saw my best parts as my worst traits)

how can i be proud of my cgpa and marks when I feel scared of working in the final year and i have advisors to answer to, how can i feel not lonely but also be me in a way that people would love most of the time i just feel very unloved and idk I am losing the sight of me and I am really fuckint lonely

AND OH MY PROFESSOR loved loved my fleabag essay last term, I met her and she said IT'S A GREAT PIECE OF SCHOLARSHIP (not just an assignment, but scholarship something beyond the class and she told me to take credit of my work and write explicitly that this is your idea) AND IT MADE MY DAY but yet I still feel like shit

my roomie came and she didn't even notice me crying rn but I happy for her one of the profs at whose place her boyfriend is staying told her that she's welcome to stay also there are nice accepting people here yet idk if people can accept me for me

[milzumono]

a rant on nbc hannibal and freedom - j. krishnamurti’s philosophy

[the following is a slightly-edited typed up rant of a video recording i made talking to myself about nbc hannibal in relation to Jiddu Krishnamurti’s philosophical view of freedom last fall. i recommend his book Think on these Things.  yeah i have brainrot. i don’t really go anywhere deep with this. it really is just more of a ramble, but maybe someone will find it cool. there are spoilers.]

**

i had a philosophy class and we were talking about krishnamurti’s definition of freedom and what it means to be free, and how one can achieve authentic freedom.

krishnamurti basically says that freedom comes from revolting - obviously - but not in the typical way. he means freedom comes from revolting against what is expected of you and of what you were conditioned. freedom to krishnamurti means not repressing who you are. it’s looking into yourself and letting go of the fear of what you’ll find if you really really look into yourself. it’s allowing a thought to be acted upon. because the more you think about something and that idea takes root in your head, it’s a lot harder to get it out. and it’s a lot more likely that you’ll act on that thought eventually. but we repress a lot of thoughts. we have a lot of thoughts, we think about them, we imagine doing them, but we often don’t do them. krishnamurti says freedom is acting upon that thought. it’s not just independence; it’s not financial independence. you can do all of those things and still not be free. freedom to krishnamurti is intelligence, it’s looking into what you are and just seeing it for what it is. i believe the ultimate definition of his view of freedom is not trying to become anything except yourself. it’s having the intelligence to become yourself. and to transform. because from understanding comes transformation.

and me being the bitch i am, mentioned hannibal to the professor. [the professor didn’t mind it, someone else had brought up adventure time the other day, i don’t even remember why… he thanked me for bringing it up. if i didn’t think he’d be okay with it i wouldn’t have.] because with that whole show (besides the homoeroticism and murder and all of that) i love thinking about the philosophical aspects of freedom and morality and precisely what krishnamurti describes as becoming yourself. that is part of the core of the show. it’s about a character who becomes himself upon meeting someone who sees him for all of him and accepts it. of course, will’s becoming of himself heavily casts shadows on his own morality. so i said to the professor that in krishnamurti’s eyes i think he would say that hannibal is free. his nature is that he likes killing people, and finds beauty in death and in what he does and what he creates out of these people he finds discourteous and rude. he is who he is when he's alone without any guilt or shame. he values his freedom. i mean, at the end of the “mizumono” he verbalizes how much it matters to him, which made will’s betrayal all the more painful. (“my freedom, then. you would take that from me.”)

and you have will who’s a foil to that, who’s very much like hannibal. (“we’re just alike.”) he likes killing people, he fantasizes about killing people, but the difference is he’s arguably not free, because throughout the whole show he’s repressing that urge and he tries his hardest to file these thoughts away because until he meets hannibal he accepts that no one would ever tolerate it. and even if someone does, his conditioned morality constantly reminds him how many people would get hurt. he believes he should employ his empathy, compassion, and imagination for the greater good. so will is literally the exact opposite of freedom, because like krishnamurti said he’s driven by his fear. he fears becoming something. he fears becoming himself. he fears the transformation that hannibal describes in “savoureux”—becoming something other than yourself—yourself in this case who he wants to believe he is, rather than who he actually is/his true self. (“if you had just cultivated the urges you kept down for so long, followed the inspirations as they are, you would’ve become someone other than yourself.”) his whole arc is will trying to be a good, or at least normal and decent person and struggling. will is not any of that, and neither is hannibal. will takes pleasure in killing people, he relishes the savagery of it… that’s just who he is. but he’s always trying to mold himself into everyone else. (a believable person suit.) he just wants to fit into society, but he’s doomed not to, and that’s why his inner conflict and dissatisfaction is the main propeller of the story.

thus i believe that the likelihood of them both dying at the end of the series was the most feasible form of freedom. because there were three possibilities—they live, and kill people, they live and they repress who they are (they don’t kill people), and three, they both die. them living and both killing people is bad for obvious reasons. them living and repressing who they are and not killing people…? sure, it’s moral in the sense that they don’t kill anybody, but it’s also sad for them to have to repress who they are because they thus lose their own freedom in that process. other people have their freedom, but then they lose theirs. they would have to live their whole lives pretending to be people they aren’t, and that’s not really living. so… that’s kinda fucked up. or at least the series makes us think so. they both die? no one else gets killed, and the end of their existence means they can finally stop fighting their urges or changing themselves to conform to the world. (while i love musing on their life together in a s4, this is why most days i believe they died in that sea after all. perhaps will would never feel free even if they did survive the fall - perhaps society’s eyes would weigh him down no matter what. this may have been one reason for him plunging off that cliff. he was with hannibal, the truest and freest versions of themselves had fully conjoined for the first time, but perhaps will believed they could only maintain true, eternal freedom in this lifetime through death. but at least they would be together. it’s tragic.)

(it’s beautiful.)

[this part is much more of a tangent.] what was interesting is that my professor claims hannibal isn’t really free, because he’s hindered by a mental illness and a psychopathic disorder. but that’s the thing. he isn’t quite a psychopath. he isn’t a sociopath. he’s capable of profound love and compassion (although for only two people in his life), and that’s what makes him such a complex character. he can’t be categorized into any one thing. so can we really say he’s hindered by a mental disorder? obviously there is a lack of empathy in how he can so easily find a reason to kill someone and he definitely suffers from narcissism, but my point is he’s still capable of love. then, doesn’t that also bring into question… what exactly is a mental illness? most people would define it as a long-term mental state that causes you to not be able to function in society properly. well, if everyone has a different definition of what it means to live in a functional society and what a functional society looks like, then, can we really say that anything is a mental illness? [obviously i’m not referring to conditions like depression that directly go against one’s own survival. i mean more so things like adhd, is adhd really a disorder, or do we just live in a society that has very specific and confined definitions of what it means to be successful that doesn’t meet eye to eye with something like adhd—so many people with adhd are extremely gifted in their hobbies or analytical skills, and i would not deem anything to be ‘wrong’ with them… but this is a whole other discussion.

because this is fiction, i’m able to delve into the minds of these people with a lot of traits of antisocial personality disorder, and see they still revolt against that label. which many characters remark throughout the series.]

hannibal genuinely thinks he is contributing to a better world by being who he is. he sees the people he kills as pigs, so he believes they’re better off being bacon. so if he thinks he’s genuinely doing good by wiping up these pigs… if that’s his way of contributing to a better society, can we really classify that as a mental illness? [i take a huge ass pause here]

tdlr; hannibal has formed his own philosophy on life and people, a weird combination of hedonism and aestheticism, and lived it shamelessly. will battles it for the entire series. whether hannibal, in particular, was free the entire time or was always imprisoned by his own inflated sense of self and inability to understand just how much his manipulation of will inevitably hurt him, is difficult to answer.

by the way, just to make things clear, i know he’s a terrible person. if i knew him, i myself would want him dead. him and will. not out of hatred, but just because that would be the best thing for them. they wouldn’t have their freedom in prison, but being alive they would destroy other people’s freedom. so the best thing for them is to just not exist. i’m not justifying how either of them perceive the world or how they conduct themselves. they’re literally murderers. i’m just trying to see it for what it is because i find this story so fucking fascinating.

[*on that note… if you’d like, you can check out my will inspired playlist here.]

[scarfacemarston]

Updates

I don’t know how many of you will read this, but I’m ranting about positivity for once! Some people have been disappointed about my disappearing or have been annoyed about my lack of content, so I included some of an explanation. I know as cringe as it sounds, I can be a rather dark/negative person. I know I am, I’ve been told - sometimes harshly - on here. My life has been hellish in a lot of ways that I won’t share. HOWEVER, right now, I feel so heard. This is the lightest I’ve felt in months. Those of you who know me well know I have had my mental health tank since October, and it worsened as time went on. A lot of this was due to loneliness, but more so, struggles with my tuberculosis thesis. My advisor essentially abandoned me. They didn’t respond to my emails for months and when they did, essentially told me to start over. I started writing in October and they didn’t respond to me until January.  I had the university on my ass threatening to suspend me because I had an incomplete that HAD to be turned in that semester. I then didn't hear from her until March and nothing else. except more talks of starting over. I used to guess work to appease the university and was lucky it to finish the last day after sending multiple emails for what the professor wanted. . Guys, if you are in a graduate program - It is NOT NORMAL for an advisor to disappear on you, especially for this long.  Talk to someone higher up if this happens to you.   On the years of original research which included travel, experimentation, and having to develop extremely complex numerical data.  I finally talked to my historic preservation advisor and we’re shortening it and he’s making sure I can use at least some of the 60 pages I have already written. I have written 250 pages of tuberculosis research since I started the research process in 2018, but only 60 for the thesis which has to be a minimum of 80.  I would be able to graduate on time and FINALLY get a proper job when this is over.  It’s the lightest I felt in years. I have some time off to work on other things. This doesn’t mean all my problems are fixed. I still have a lot of personal things going on in life like health that will stay personal as possible, and the loneliness is still horrible, but I hope that will slowly improve. I’ll also be able to finally set up a Ko-fi so I can finally make some money. I lost a lot of funds because I was expected to come at the beck and call of my thesis advisor at any time for additional work. They did not fund me for anything.  So yeah, I finally have my wonderful historic preservation professor and my history of medicine professor on my side.  Yes, this is long, but I don’t know how to cut things down since I ramble. I literally wrote a script so I wouldn’t stutter and ramble nervously. lol (It’s very helpful if you all want to try it!) But yeah, here’s hoping I can be more present in friendships and find some new friends, and maybe make a little money on the way. Thank you for those who have shown your support. Your anons have been so wonderful. You’re so appreciated. <3

[a-tale-of-legends]

Okay since I did Wally, it makes sense I would do Blue. Gonna try and keep it shorter than Wally:s lol. Blue's dynamic with the other rivals!

Silver: Little bro # 1. Next to Beryl, Blue pretty much understood Silver the most in his you get years, and because of that he became this mentor/older brother figure to Silvs. Next to the dragon den, Viridian gym became a safe space for Silver to just hang out, though his definition of hanging out is battling lol. Silver had to deal with the love saga that was Red and Blue and will constantly rip at them for it ( Blue would then mention something about Kenji and that gets Silver to shut up).

Wally: The Bestie ( next to his sisters and Red). How did these two become such close friends despite seemingly contrasting personalities? Blue would give you a long backstory as to how the two met and thus became friends. Wally would shrug and say " The fuck I know. But I am grateful to be his friend :)"( note: Blue did not teach Wally to swear. That was Green). The balance each other off really well tbh. Blue had gone full Karen for Wally once, me thinks. Blue has been concerned with Wally's desire for strength at the cost of bonding with his pokemon, but he ( and others) addressed it with him at some point. Wally and his pokemon are doing better for it! Wally, in turn,let's Blue just rant to him about his frustrations- gym stuff, Red, family stuff, his own goals in life...the man was very conflicted in what he wanted to do in life. These two consider each other their best friend, and I will die on this hill.

Barry: This one is hard since I don't know exactly how they would meet? The best I can think of is in b2w2 during the pwt, if Danica invited Barry along as a plus one. But even then, I'm not entirely sure about how blue perceives him. I do think he appreciates the energy and enthusiasm! Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he saw him as another rival( of course Red and Green are his #1 rivals, and no one can top that). I can totally see the banter between these two being wild ( Blue seems to be the type to playfully egg Barry on).

Bianca: Being the grandson of the esteemed Prof. Oak and having your older sister eventually take the mantel of pokemon professor means that you- Blue - by proxy is always In The Know of the whozawhatsit in the pokemon scientific sphere. So,by proxy, he knew Bianca before officially meeting her. Daisy said that she's a sweet girl, and when meeting her ( thanks to Cheren) , he can say she is really sweet. Though he also appreciates the snark in her. Blue would say he's not too deep into the pokemon professor stuff ( he's not one in my au, but he dabbles into it here and there), but Bianca can and will sight the long conversations they would have about whatever sciencey pokemon topic that comes to mind. He ain't slick.

Cheren: So basically it went like this.

Literally anyone: Oh hey, I heard that Unova has a new normal type gym leader.

Blue, a "normal" type gym leader: Oh?

Literally anyone: Yeah, apparently he helped fight off Team Plasma two years ago.

Blue, who had encounters with his own regions evil team: Oh???

Literally anyone: Mhm. He used to be friends with the guy who stopped them, but that guy disappeared one day-

Blue, who is honestly still healing from everything, including Red just up and leaving: Oh you don't say?!

So basically Cheren is Little Bro # 2. He loves teasing him. It took a while for Cheren to really reciprocate( Blue was kinda Too Much, especially given his general, well, Blueness), but now they're really good friends! Much like Bianca, blue has had long conversations about pokemon and stuff ( which includes trauma and feelings of inadequacy).

Hugh: Another hard one, but probably like Barry. Appreciates the vigor, the drive, etc. Gonna look at pokemas for this one.

Okay time for rapid fire stuff cause this is getting long again.

Kalos rivals: Sorry to group them together :(. Blue knew about them before meeting them for the same reasons stated in Bianca's part. Shauna and him are always in contact due to the Chosen business, but Shauna has encouraged his Dramatic Bitch behavior lol. Sees a bit of Wally in Trevor, and likes talking to him about the Pokedex. Isn't super big on contests, but his sister( Daisy) would partake in them, so he would catch Tierno in a few here and there.

Alola rivals: His KIDS!!! Living in Alola means he sees them often, and once again became yet another mentor figure for them. This was at a point where Blue has become his most mature self, still classic Blue, but less likely to egg someone on for a response unless it's actually needed. He genuinely loves seeing them hang out together and enjoy life, as well as battling as they see fit. He gets really sappy around them lol. Gladion and Ames ( not a rival, oc) call him Old Man. In SM he's only 21 lmao.

Galar rivals: Have not met them properly I think. He had heard about Hop from Leon when he- Leon - was champion. He also probably tuned into the Galar gym challenge and watched everything about it, so he knows about Bede and Marnie from there. If I ever have them medy properly, I think Hop and Bede would be Little Bro #3 and 4. Marnie would be Little Sis # 1 ( Green is Blue's actual little sister in my au, so she doesn't count).

And yeah. That was long. Again. Ah well.

[gorematchala]

Final Fantasy 7, as its own self contained series including all the compilation stuff and Remake, is one of the most bafflingly awful pieces of media I've ever interacted with. Its popularity is part of whatsso frustrating about it to me, but the real issue is a lack of form and structure. I struggle even now to organize my thoughts but this is gonna be a full spoilers rant because I just finished catching up on Remake

FF7 on its face is a game about ecoterrorism, and class inequality. At least for a while. It then gets into flirting with the concepts of an ancient civilization and an alien invader. The afterlife and the perversion of it by the invader. These are all pretty dense topics

You see normally stories, especially long ones, have a thing called "internal consistency" which goes alongside "framework". The problem with games written by Tetsuya Nomura, like Kingdom Hearts, is that the man loves to write the phrase "and then" at the end of literally every sentence. Kingdom Hearts is the most obvious example. There was a bad man named Ansem, and then there was 13 bad guys led by another guy, and then there was a guy who was both of those guys, and then there was a X-blade which is like the keyblade but a morbillion times stronger, and then and then and then

And I have friends who love Kingdom Hearts. Its fine to like it, but lets not pretend its a well structured tight narrative. I often describe those games as Vibe Based Storytelling. The Darkness means whatever you want it to mean in the moment you're hearing about it. People are always "a part" of other people and no one ever explains what that means beyond the separation of the body and soul. I never used to compare FF7 unfavorably to Kingdom Hearts, but FF7R really took the worst parts of those games, which is "The Darkness" and all the vague lofty dialogue that surrouds it, and slotted it into a story that already had issues. And then they also introduced time travel

I do this thing often where I trace a problem back to its source. Its interesting to look at the few potentially little actions or motivations that spiraled out into a much bigger problem. Breaking Bad does that for you by telling you in like season 4 what Walt's actual inciting incident was. And it makes you go wow, what a small petty selfish man. Which is good in that example, I think because you know what kind of guy Walter is by then, so you go "Oh of course it would be fucking nothing. Of course it was just you being too stubborn to do a good thing for yourself at the expense of a little pride. Thats so Walt-core"

In FF7 if you trace the plot back you arrive at professor Hojo, who's motivation from the start is that he loves doing "research". I think this is because they wrote a mad scientist into the script and never wrote like, why he's a mad scientist. In FF7R they keep talking about the Promised Land, and constructing Neo Midgar, but never once do they explain what they think the Promised Land is or how they think Aerith can get them there, or what building Neo Midgar would do for them exactly. With all the time and money they invested in the underground facilities for each department they could just like, build better roads if that was what they wanted. But since they have meetings all the time just to whip Reeve in the balls I dont think thats their goal

So like the framework we're given in this modern era of ours is that they found Jenova and thought she was an ancient, so they started using her cells to make super soldiers for some reason, and then Hojo shot vincent and fucked his girlfriend to make Sephiroth. Sephiroth found out he was a weird mutant and he either went crazy or finally started to hear the call of Reunion or something? So he starts doing the joker smile and repeating the same 4 lines from Advent Children over and over again every time he appears in something. He dies, Zack dies, Cloud inherits the sword and Zacks persona, he also gets a little Jenova goop in him. Then in the original Jenova's body is taken over by Sephiroths will and escapes Shinra tower, which draws Cloud to him at the temple of the ancients and then a bunch of shit happens.

So Cloud and Sephiroth have no relationship except Cloud was the guy that threw Sephy into the abyss. Hojo is compelled to "Do Research" to the point that he later digitizes his brain and takes over Weiss's body so he can Do Research some more, with no particular goal in mind. Which its now been revealed that Chadley made that possible. The little shota android that Hojo made to be his assistant, which I think warrants a harddrive search. Sephiroth wants to destroy the planet, or rule it, or ride it across the universe to find whatever the Kingdom He- I mean the Promised land is. But in 7 Remake he just teleports himself and Cloud to the edge of the universe, so if he can just do that then what does he need the planet for? And Tifa needs twink cock sooo bad or she will die, and she will sacrifice the whole world if it gets her filled like a water balloon

So at the end of 7 Remake Sephiroth opens a portal to somewhere and says come get me teehee, and Aerith then turns the portal white? And then they go in and fight the advent children guys and a big purple soul monster in what seems to be a parallel universe??? And it isnt clear if theyre still in that parallel universe at the end of the game?? But they fight the Sephiroth kids because the whispers are the cries of the planet but they are also destiny, and they also control time, and theyre also monsters sometimes. So they kill the big guy, which somehow ripples back and makes Zack no longer dead. If Zack is no longer dead, the whole thing falls apart because Cloud is nothing without that death. But whatever, it places him as he was back then into current day, sure. But why? I know the answer is because fans like him, but this is what I'm talking about. The whole plot of everything that came out after 7 is based on how much the fans love Sephiroth, and they keep throwing in all this extra shit like Genesis and Angeal, the whispers, reunion theory, deepground, Sephiroth literally just making Kingdom Hearts shadow portals and purple heartless tornados, and it's all constructed on the inciting incident that Hojo just likes to Do Research. There's no solid understanding of anyones motivations, or the mechanics of the setting, or why Tifa had to arch her back and make herself look more breedable for Cloud while Jessie was dying. Or why she can't stop making sex noises whenever a door opens or an elevator stops

I guess I can relate cuz this post has no clear motivation I'm just pissed off that they're parading Zacks corpse around and that they got maybe the worst voice actor of all time to replace one of the best voice actors in the franchise. Because Zack is this shining beacon of normalness in Crisis Core. All this bullshit is happening around him and Genesis is talking about the gift of the goddess, and Zack is like dude I dont know what you're talking about, and I'm like me neither brother