#onion's posts

[krasnyel]

regular ascot-loving-mystery-solving family

[may-darling]

I find it absolutely hilarious that after playing the popularised sexy man “James Bond” for what feels like a millennium, Daniel Craig has only now reached tumblr sexy man status by playing a funky southern gay detective with a hubby that bakes sour bread. If this is not the most on brand tumblr thing I don’t know what is

[killlerfang1]

The Onion is out for BLOOD

[setaflow]

Gay pride happens in June and gay wrath happens whenever hbomberguy drops a 3+ hour video essay about a specific topic

[megamindsupremacy]

Actually my favorite part of Glass Onion was that random fucking dude on the island. What the fuck was he doing there. I thought Darryl (Derrick? David? ??) was like foreshadowing for something or he’d be the twist killer but NOPE he literally was just chillin. Some random lady breaks into his room COOL this detective guy wants to smoke with him SURE the GODDAMN HOUSE EXPLODES? Yeah why not he wasn’t using it that much anyways. Randomass guy you are my hero

[thehumanwiki]

Pokémon but I once again badly edited Onion Headlines onto it

Part 1, Part 3

[werepigeon]

we could've had it all

[the-swift-tricker]

rian johnson after writing glass onion, watching elon musk completely fuck over twitter like a petulant child, knowing his movie is coming out in just a few weeks

[vampirerex]

“It makes no damn sense! Compels me though,” and “no, it’s JUST DUMB” are the two most important additions to the general vernacular ever

[strawlessandbraless]

Dean & Cas + text posts 💙 💚

A beautiful anon gifted me with my new blue and green check marks, I wanted to return the favor. Hope this makes you smile

[oniondraws]

crying over a gummy crocodile npc guys

[offonaherosjourney]

Petition for Rian Johnson to release a 10 minute short film where Ransom Drysdale and Miles Bron are cellmates, because Miles "I only spent 10 seconds planning each of my murders" Bron and Ransom "my murder plan was so smart and elaborate it could have been in one of my grandpa's novels" Drysdale would drive each other ABSOLUTELY MAD and I would enjoy the fuck out of every second

[beaulesbian]

Glass Onion spoilers ahead! - long post

These parallels in the movie are so *chef's kiss* ✨️

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what a combo these two make! ♥

[yoru-kage]

Benoit Blanc is utterly delightful pass it on

[drbtinglecannon]

The way in Knives Out that the entire Thrombey family constantly subjected Marta to racism for years ranging from micro aggressions to outright threats of deportation, that she knew all their fucked up dirty laundry and how they all were constantly exploiting Harlan's wealth, that they excluded her from Harlan's funeral and each blamed everyone else for it, and that they immediately dropped all pretenses of condescending civility when the will was read, yet she spent almost the entire movie sympathetic of them and wanting to gift them the fortune Harlan left her before finally standing up for herself in the last hour

Vs

The way in Glass Onion that Helen outright hated the entire "disrupters" group for at least ~10yrs before the movie even took place and made her opinion explicitly known, that her acting as her twin sister being jilted was so easy to maintain because she hated the entire group so much, that she didn't at all humor their extremely conditional "comradery" with her cause against Miles, and that in the end when everything was said and done she didn't stick around to watch them all turn on each other because it didn't matter anymore if they did or didn't

Marta's kindness got her the house.

Helen's justified fury burned Miles' down.

[moresandmanstuff]