#one thing about sirius black is that he feels everything deeply

[deswhomst]

potential wolfstar hot take (i’m not sure if it is but i’ve never seen anyone talk about it)?

i think remus would have been very jealous of james and sirius’ bond, especially pre-relationship and in the early stages. it’s impossible for him to not have felt insecure and in second place.

until one day, he breaks down and confesses this to sirius. and sirius (who had already dealt with something similar with regulus) tells him gently that he has a lot of love to give and his love for james and remus was different. it could not be compared because it meant everything to him but not in the same way. he does not love james more than remus or vice versa. it’s just love, and it’s more love than he was ever allowed, and it’s for them before it’s for anyone else.

[amiableness]

Kiss and Makeup

Pairing: James Potter x Fem!Reader

Summary: James ruins reader’s date and attempts to make it better.

Word Count: 2829

Warnings: Jealous!James; kissing; and reader wearing heels, jewelry and makeup.

A/N 💌: A quick James oneshot that’s been on my mind, but I’m heavily consider making a second part to this.

As usual, thank you to @moonpascal for reading!

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“Go on, kiss and make up!” Sirius’ voice trails after you as you hurry down the corridor, James close on your heels. On any other day, you might have tossed a playful jab back at Sirius, well-accustomed to his relentless teasing about you and James. But today, the weight of everything made your throat tighten, leaving you silent, your focus fixed on reaching the safety of your dorm.

The sharp click of your heels echoed off the stone walls, and James’ muttering about your surprising speed in heels barely registers. Your anger simmers, blocking out his words as you storm ahead and shove the door open. James is right behind you, catching it just before it could slam shut in his face, determined not to let you shut him out.

“Get out, Jamie.” Though your voice was laced with anger, the way you used his nickname gave him a glimmer of hope. It wasn’t hopeless—there was still a chance to make everything better.

“I’m not leaving until we figure this out.” James says, stepping forward and leaning against the post of Lily’s bed as he watches you roll your eyes and turn into the room. He doesn’t say anything as you begin furiously grabbing clothes and scattered heels off the floor—remnants of you getting ready for a date, now tainted by the tension hanging between you two.

“There’s nothing to figure out! You ruined my date, plain and simple.” You spin around, clutching a black heel in your hand, and for a fleeting moment, James braces himself, half-expecting you to launch it at him in a fit of frustration. But it’s you, his sweet best friend—the one who cares so deeply for others that you always put them before yourself. It’s a trait that drives James a little crazy sometimes, knowing you’d sacrifice your own happiness without a second thought.

The realization only sharpens the sting of your anger, an unfamiliar weight he’s not used to carrying. He can recall times you’ve been disappointed—maybe after one of his careless pranks or his thoughtless disregard for someone’s feelings—but never this. Never this level of anger.

“I said I was sorry.” He tries, crossing his arms over his chest as he watches you scoff and turn away, angrily kicking off your heels. You bend down to pick them up, and despite himself, his eyes drift to the curve of your body. He knows he shouldn’t be looking, but he can’t help it—he’s never been able to take his eyes off you. And now, a bitter feeling twists in his gut, knowing you’re dressed all pretty for someone else.

“You’re not, though. Why the fuck did you feel the need to scare him off?” You toss the heels into your trunk and turn to face him, arms crossed. He opens his mouth to respond, but the words die before they form—because he doesn’t know how to tell you the truth. He knows exactly why, but admitting it out loud would change everything between you. And he’s not sure he’s ready for that.

The silence between you stretches, heavy and unspoken, as you wait for an answer he isn’t ready to give. You both know exactly what you’re waiting for—a proper explanation.

One you’ve been holding out hope for, quietly, for years.

“It’s not fair, you know.” You let out a deep sigh, turning to face your desk, your gaze falling on the mirror. James watches as you begin to remove your jewelry, your back turned to him, but his reflection still catches glimpses of you.The anger in your voice has softened, but he knows that if he says the wrong thing, it could all flare up again, as sharp and sudden as before.

“What isn’t?” He hesitates, watching you carefully as he takes a cautious step forward. His eyes follow the way your lips part in the mirror, the soft exhale of frustration escaping you as you fumble with your necklace.

He wants to step forward, to gently brush your hair aside and unfasten the clasp, to press a soft kiss against the back of your neck once the necklace slips away. But he can’t—so he remains still, trapped in silence, as he watches you instead.

“Why is it that you go out with girl after girl, but when I show interest in a guy, you scare him off?” You already knew the answer—weren’t blind to it. It had been clear to everyone that you and James had been circling each other for years, dancing around unspoken words.

But he refused to admit that he cared for you as more than friends. It felt pointless to tell him how you felt when it was clear James was intent on keeping you in the friend zone.

From the moment crushes became a part of your life, James had been yours. But you were never certain about his feelings—until that one night when he got blackout drunk and confessed he was in love with you. He has no memory of that drunken night, but you overheard him later, telling the boys he’d never drink that much again because he wanted to actually remember the parties he went to. You’d felt a pang of disappointment, but you were gathering the courage to confront him about it. Then, the next day, he hooked up with a girl from Ravenclaw, and just like that, all your resolve crumbled, leaving you feeling more invisible than ever.

He didn’t remember what he’d said, and if he was out with other girls, it was clear he didn’t care enough to mention it while sober.

That was a year ago, and you still hadn’t brought it up. 

So, to cope with the mess of it all, you went on a date—a rare one, the first in nearly a year. And now, here was James, wrecking it all over again.

“I—” He stops himself, clearing his throat, the tension in his voice betraying the lie before he even finishes. “I don’t think that’s true. You go out on dates.”

He knew he spent a lot of time flirting with girls—whether it was during class, when he should have been paying attention, or at parties where conversation flowed too easily. But when someone showed interest in you? That was a different story altogether. He’d like to blame it on the fact that you were his best friend, but deep down, he knew better.He was protective of you because he couldn’t stand the thought of anyone looking at you the way he did. Was it selfish? Definitely. But the thought of losing you terrified him more than anything.

“You know that’s a lie. You saw how excited I was! Why did you take that from me?” You were fully aware of how weak and accusatory your voice sounded, but you didn’t care. You were hurt, and it was clear in the way you shook your head, disappointment heavy in every movement. James watched your reflection, noticing the way you swallowed hard as if trying to shove down the swell of emotions threatening to break free. And with that, a wave of guilt slammed into his stomach, settling there like a stone.

“I just didn’t want him to hurt you!” 

“So you decided to take that off his hands and hurt me instead?” You scoffed, making James flinched as if you had slapped him. It probably would have hurt less if you had.

“Merlin, no! Sweetheart, that wasn’t what I was trying to do—”

“Then what were you trying to do, James? Because I’m getting tired of this little game, we have going on.” 

He lets out a shaky breath, his eyes following your hand as you gently remove one of your earrings. For a moment, your gazes meet through the mirror, and the weight of it all presses down on him. He wishes, desperately, that you would justturn around and face him.

He was racking his brain, searching for the right words, trying to find a way to fix this. He considered stepping back, giving you space like he did when you got agitated with him. But this felt different. It wasn’t just about a moment of frustration—it was something deeper, something that could damage your friendship permanently if he didn’t speak up. He knew he had to fix this.

“You guys make up yet?” Sirius hollered, and James could practically picture him standing at the  bottom of the stairs with his hands cupped around his mouth as he shouted at the both of you.

Sirius’ words from earlier echoed in his head as if they were taunting him, swirling around like a cruel mantra. 

Go on, kiss and make up.

It felt like an accusation, a reminder of how much he’d messed up. He could feel the weight of it pressing down on him, twisting in his gut. Every nerve in his body screamed that his next move would either make everything worse—digging the hole even deeper—or finally give him a chance to tell you why he’d ruined your date. But the fear of losing you pushed him forward.

“Tell me to stop, sweetheart.”

“Stop what—?” You ask, tossing your last piece of jewelry into the ceramic dish with a sharp clang before turning to face James. Your breath catching in your throat as he moves closer, and without thinking, you instinctively take a step back, bumping into your desk. The sudden movement rattles the items on top, sending a soft, anxious clatter through the room.

A sharp gasp escapes your lips as James reaches out, his hand gently cupping your cheek, his thumb grazing the edge of your jaw. You stare up at him, wide-eyed, and James can’t help but think how pretty you look—more than he’s ever allowed himself to admit. 

He’s never been able to admire you like this before, not without the constant fear of you catching him.

His hands are shaky, and his proximity to you is making him nervous in a way that he couldn’t quite shake. But he didn’t know how else to explain himself. So, tentatively, he let his fingers graze your skin, admiring how you melted into him. He watches, heart pounding, as your lashes flutter and your lips part in surprise at the softness of his touch. The anger in your eyes had faded, leaving behind disbelief and something that looked dangerously close to hope.

He startles both himself and you when the words slip out, low and raw: “You make me so fucking nervous.” You blink up at him, silent, processing the confession. His gaze drifts over the mascara you’d carefully applied, the gloss glistening on your lips—details he hadn’t noticed before, but now felt like a punch to his gut. The jealousy flares, burning hot and fast in the pit of his stomach. It was devastating to realize you were all dressed up, and it wasn’t for him. Those heels, thoseglossed lips—they were for a guy who hardly knew you. 

Not like James knew you.

You part your lips, and James unknowingly silences you with a gentle brush of his thumb just beneath your lower lip. A soft, satisfied smile tugs at his mouth as he hears the gasp escape you. His hand rests on your left hip, pulling you closer, grounding you against him. The tension in the room thickens, and just like that, your anger has melted.

“If you want me to stop, just say the word, sweetheart.” He murmurs, his voice low and thick with intention as he edged closer. His fingers caressing your jaw, tilting your face upwards, bringing you within a breath of him. The air between you crackles, heavy and charged, and you feel the pull—the tempting, intoxicating proximity. He was so close now, you could feel the warmth of his breath, and all it would take was the slightest movement for his lips to claim yours.

You thought about saying it—the words were right there, just on the tip of your tongue. But then his lips brushed against yours just barely, and everything else faded away. You couldn’t bring yourself to say no—not when this was something you’d wanted for years. Even with the anger simmering inside you, the frustration over James ruining your date, you couldn’t pull away.

Not now. Not when he was so close.

If anything, a strange sense of relief was starting to wash over you—relief that he had ruined it. Because if he hadn’t, it might have been another guy standing where he was now, and the thought of that made something tighten painfully in your chest.

“Last chance.” He mumbled, pulling back just enough to meet your eyes, searching for any sign that you might stop him. The only sound between you was the uneven rhythm of your breaths, erratic and heavy, pulsing with the desire that surged between you both. When you didn’t say a thing, no rejection, no hesitation—only the warmth of your breath mingling with his—he offered a barely-there smile before leaning in, his lips finally capturing yours with a slow, gentle kiss.

He started slow, cautious, as if afraid he might push you away. But the wrecked hum that escaped your throat—the sound of pure desire—told him everything he needed to know. You wanted this as much as he did.

It was overwhelming how quickly the kiss shifted—what started as sweet and searching, quickly turned frantic and hungry. The slow, deliberate pace gave way to a fiery urgency. The gentle brush of lips became a desperate meeting of mouths as the two of you gave into years of pining.

Your hands, which had been gripping the edge of the desk hard, moved slowly toward him. You let your fingers trail up his stomach, feeling the dips and ridges before reaching his chest. Your other hand found its way into his curls, youtugged softly, the motion pulling a low, pleasure-filled groan from deep within him. That sound, the sound of him unraveling, seemed to shatter something inside James. In an instant, he stepped closer—if that was even possible—until your bodies were pressed together, the heat between you two undeniable, consuming.

He pulled away just an inch, and the desperate whine that escaped your lips was enough to pull him back in, his arms circling your waist before effortlessly lifting you onto the desk. You gasped his name, the sound caught in your throat, as his lips claimed yours again, urgent and hungry. One hand slid around your thigh, pulling you closer, the heat of his body pressing against yours as he stood between your parted legs. His grip on your hip was firm, grounding, while his other hand found its place at the side of your throat, fingers warm and possessive.

You had never been kissed like this before. It was overwhelming—an all-consuming heat that ignited deep in your belly as James kissed you with a hunger, as if he’d been waiting for this moment his entire life.

And it was ruining you, because if this was how it felt to kiss James Potter, you never wanted to be kissed by anyone else ever again.

He rocked his hips against yours, the pressure making you gasp, and that breathless sound was all he needed. He deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding into your mouth, tasting you as if he couldn’t get enough. You were so completely immersed in him—the feel of his lips, the taste of him—that the low, teasing whistle from your doorway barely registered in your mind.

“Bloody hell, I didn’t expect you to actually go and kiss her.” Sirius’ voice rang out, loud and unfiltered. The words struck a panic through you, your body warming with embarrassment as you instinctively tucked your head into James’ chest, hoping to hide from the intrusion. You would recognize Sirius’ voice anywhere, and you knew you would be teased about this for ages.

James, with you still propped on the desk, remained a shield, his body pressed protectively against yours. He glanced over at Sirius and Remus, who stood by the doorway. Sirius, leaning against the doorframe, raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing at the corner of his lips, while Remus stood next to him, his usually calm demeanor showing signs of awkwardness.

“Fuck off and shut the door, mate.” James groans, his arms pulling you tighter as he fights the urge to hurl a book at Sirius and Remus. Instead, he sends them a warning glare and brings a hand up to the back of your head, the heat of the moment still burning between you, and silently dares them to say anything more.

The boys hesitate, but not before Sirius calls out with a teasing smirk, “Didn’t know you had it in you, Potter. You finally got your girl.” And just like that, the door slams shut, leaving the air thick with tension and you cringing in embarrassment.

Maybe telling him you loved him wasn’t that pointless after all.

please consider reblogging or leaving a comment! it keeps me motivated to write and spread my work! 🤍

[hirayalore]

you and SIRIUS BLACK never discussed it out loud, but you both knew that you didn’t want to have kids after everything that happened in the last 13 years.

it wasn’t always like that, though (contrary to popular belief). he could faintly remember back then when both of you were still studying in hogwarts that you’d open the prospect of having children with him and having a family someday—and sirius, although scared to death at the thought of ever raising kids his own when he didn’t even grow up with good parents himself, was amicable with the idea if it meant that he’d see little versions of you running around in your future home.

but then he was imprisoned for 12 years, and that was 12 years of not spending every single day with you, of not waking up in bed beside you, of not being able to share meals, of not being able to do the most normal things that young couples did in their twenties… of not being able to propose, of getting married, of having a family together…

so, when he came back and got his name cleared by the ministry, all he wanted was to make up for that lost time. you and him were already 37 years old after all, and although it wasn’t relatively old, he still felt like both of your years ahead would never be enough to compensate for what has been taken—making the prospect of having kids and having to think of someone else other than yourselves unappealing.

until one night, he decided to make a bold step in knowing whether you two were truly on the same page like he was assuming. you never told him about your opinion regarding it, but in the way you were with him after his return, he could feel it in his bones that you didn’t want to focus on anything else other than your rekindled relationship with each other.

but he just had to make sure.

“darling,” he murmured, as you two were trying to fall asleep, his arms around you while your nose was nuzzling his throat, “do you… still ever think about having children?”

you raised your head up almost immediately, meeting his gaze. “what’s with the question?”

“nothing. it’s just that—it’s something we used to talk about. ages ago, really.”

“yeah, it was.” your eyebrows furrowed slightly, as if you were trying to recall the times you did talk about it. “we used to plan that we’d buy a flat in london and live in a muggle city, just to piss your parents off further.”

he chuckled. “we did.”

“and we’d have two kids. one girl and one boy.” you smiled, faintly remembering now.

sirius nodded. “they’d both should have my eyes—”

“and then have the rest of my features, with the nose being a requirement.” you finished for him, saying the exact line he used to tell you back then. 

the two of you laughed at the memory, fascinated at how the teenage mind works when you’re in love. at that age, you always felt invincible, like nothing could ruin the plans that you and your lover have made for yourselves. you would always believe that everything would go smoothly and that happily-ever-after was right next door, never ever thinking that adulthood could potentially drive you crazy or in this case, a dark wizard was going to try to seize control over your people.

when the laughter died down, you gazed deeply at each other, understanding that just as the times have changed—so have the circumstances and ultimately, your decision.

you ran your fingers on the side of his head, combing parts of his hair, admiring the manner in which his face showed nothing but quiet contentment.

“maybe in another life,” you began, voice coming out as a whisper, “we’d have those things. we’d have kids, and have a big home, but right now…” you leaned closer and pressed your forehead against his, savoring the proximity you once longed for in thousands of nights. “i’m happy with just the two of us. with you, sweetheart.”

sirius smiled and nodded, a hand gently rubbing along the expanse of your back, tugging you closer. “me too, love.” he sighed. “me too.”

with no other words needed to be spoken, you pressed a brief yet firm kiss on his lips before sinking back in your previous position, embracing him and nestling in his arms, knowing that even an eternity of making up for what fate had stolen would never feel enough.

gentle reminder: this author loves feedback! let her know your thoughts if you enjoyed reading this fic and you’ll add 100+ points in her writing motivation meter ♡

[milunalupin]

hi!! I would like to request older!reader and older!sirius black where reader ends up saving him from bellatrix’s curse.

ty for requesting !! enjoyyy <3 + ty to my lovie for helping :)

— another one bites the dust (but it's definitely not sirius)

post azkaban!sirius x reader ★ 1.5k words

Lily Evans was your best friend. The two of you had been sorted into Gryffindor as muggleborn witches together and assigned the same dorm. The two of you did everything together, from studying in the library to braiding each others hair down by the Black Lake. Of course being that close meant you had to witness all of James Potter's attempts at winning your best friend over. One time you happened to alone on your way to class when James and the other 'Marauders' had stopped you, begging you for any tips on how to successfully ask Lily out.

"You've gotta let this go. She's way out of your league, you toerag." You had rolled your eyes at him, the boy gaping at your remark as you had always seemed pretty docile. Sirius Black — who you now notice was standing beside the bespectacled boy — barked out a laugh and applauded you, causing a warm feeling in your chest that you would never admit was because of him. Moreover, if James ever asked him to, Sirius wouldn't mind hanging out with you to get information on Lily (and not because he thought you were super cute).

Once James had successfully convinced Lily to date him, you and her had blended in well with the Marauders. When Lily and James would have their couple time, you would play chess with Peter and study with Remus in the common room. Sirius even let you join in on planning and performing their famous pranks (which did not jumpstart a crush on him or anything). The six of you had become your own little family, and when James had proposed to Lily after graduation it was no surprise who the groomsmen and maid of honor would be.

Meanwhile you had also fallen in love with Sirius Black during your time at Hogwarts, and the two of you had become attached at the hip. Sirius would walk with you to class, and you'd spend nights in the astronomy tower talking about the future.

You were each other's safe space, and Sirius loved you so deeply, which led to a lot of heartbreak the the night Lily and James were killed and your boyfriend was sent to Azkaban for the rest of his life for being the one who did it. You spent the next twelve years working under the Department of Magical Law enforcement as an investigator, trying to convince the Ministry that Sirius would never in a million years do anything to hurt his friend, much less kill him and his wife. They ignored you, dismissing your claims as a fit of hysteria, weaponizing your grief against you. You had been nonstop trying to figure out what exactly happened that night, regularly exchanging letters with Remus until he sent his final one, asking you to refrain from sending any more, as he felt too betrayed by Sirius to hear any of your theories.

The moment Peter had been revealed as the true murderer, Remus had come by your flat to apologize in person, the two of you reconciling over tea and teary hugs. When Sirius finally came back things were slow to return to "normal", but the two of you were just as in love with each other as you were back at Hogwarts. Because of his current situation with the Ministry, you moved in with him at 12 Grimmauld Place, then agreeing immediately when Dumbledore had come to the two of you about reassembling the Order of the Phoenix.

"You're a cheater Sirius Black, I don't want to play anymore." You huffed, standing up and throwing the playing cards down on the coffee table. The two of you were playing cards on the couch in Grimmauld place, trying to have a relaxing night amidst the recent chaos. Sirius cooed and pulled you down to sit on his lap, wrapping his arms around your waist and pressing sweet kisses to your shoulder. "Oh you'll survive, Mrs. Black."

The name alone caused you to melt into him, but the way he was looking at you in that moment made you feel like a teenager again, shy and in love with the boy before you. "Mrs. Black? We're not even engaged, love."

He grabbed your left hand, his thumb running over your ring finger, his voice becoming as soft as his touch. "It's coming, darling, don't you worry."

Your future mother-in-law screeched in horror from her place on the wall. "The most ancient and noble House of Black will not be accepting of a revolting mudblood! Must keep the blood pure, toujous pur!"

"I like to think I've been patient enough." you teased, gesturing to where his mother's portrait hung, the crazy bitch still muttering nonsense to herself.

Sirius sighed and lightly squeezed your hip. "I know m'love, you've been too good to me. Once things blow over a bit, I promise we'll get back to how things used to be, yeah?"

You hummed, brushing the hair out of his face and kissing his forehead. "No need to rush, we've got the rest of our lives, Sirius."

The fireplace suddenly lights up green as Severus comes through, his lip curling on one side as he saw the position you two were in and moved his gaze to somewhere else in the room.

"Severus," Sirius clicked his tongue, cocking his head to the side. "to what do we owe this pleasure?"

"The Dark Lord," his eyes met yours, then shifted to settle on Sirius. "seems to have put an idea in Mr. Potter's head that you were being tortured at the Ministry. He's on his way there to look for you, you are to alert the Order."

You and Sirius stood immediately, thanking Severus as he disappeared again and sending your patronus' to the other Order members. They arrive quickly and the six of you head to the Ministry and apparate down to the lower level chambers, wands at the ready.

Kingsley and Alastor moved towards one group of Death Eaters, with Remus and Tonks on the defense. "Harry, where's Harry?" you were frantic looking for your godson, Sirius right beside you. You find him in combat with Dolohov, rushing to his side just as he hit the dark wizard with a Full Body Bind curse.

"Nice one, Haz!" Sirius praised from a few feet away. Harry beamed at you and you smiled and squeezed his shoulder quickly before heading back over to Sirius.

The chamber was complete chaos, the dark walls lighting up with flashes of all colors, all kinds of hexes and jinxes were being thrown around. You had to admit, Harry and the other students were great at duelling and really kept up with the Order members. Out of the corner of your eye you see your beloved's deranged cousin, her wand locked onto Sirius. Her wand glowed green as she shouted out an unforgivable spell.

You turn around to see him just a few feet from the Veil. "Sirius!" you gasp, immediately casting 'Accio' to pull him out of Bellatrix's way, his hands gripping your waist to steady himself, eyes blown out in shock. You both are staring at each other, eyes watery and chests heaving.

"Too fucking good to me, darling."

Your moment was interrupted by a screeching Bellatrix, sending a 'Confringo' your way. You managed to dodge it but the spell caught the sleeve of Sirius' coat.

"Don't you fucking dare!" you growled, shooting multiple stunning spells at her which she annoyingly kept deflecting. She laughed maniacally as you circled each other, casting spells left and right. The dark witch then shot another spell at Sirius, effectively hitting him in the back then grinning madly at you, "Whoopsie!"

Your heartbeat picked up as you realized where she was standing. You quickly scanned the chamber and it seemed that most of the Death Eaters had fled or been taken down. You'd never killed anyone before, but she was one of Voldemort's strongest followers. Not only that, but she tried to attack your Sirius not just once, not twice, but three times. Your eyes widened as you saw her prepare another curse on him.

"Not my boyfriend, you bitch!"

You cast 'Depulso', throwing her back a few feet into the Veil, immediately sending her into the world of the dead. You stood there frozen, your wand still pointed where Bellatrix once stood. Sirius pulled you back into his arms, whispering "thank you"s and "i love you"s into your ear.

Harry had appeared next as the battle ended, joining in your group hug, the three of you holding each other tight. You kissed the top of your godson's head, no longer unable to hold back your tears.

Harry had come home with you and Sirius that night, having some dinner and then going upstairs to stay in one of the spare rooms. Sirius held you close in bed that night, thanking you once again for saving him. You smiled and squeezed his hand, thanking him for coming back to you all those years ago. You fell asleep that night unaware of the sparkling diamond that was hidden in Sirius' nightstand.

[evanpeterswhoresblog]

Cherry Bomb (pt. 3)

Remus Lupin x f!reader, James Potter x f!reader (mentioned), Sirius Black x f!reader (mentioned)

warnings: smut, p in v, i think it’s protected atp idk, fingering, underage smoking, very dom remus, long af but omg i’m so in love with it

summary: the last part of your plan is far harder to achieve than the first two and it’s far more complicated.

word count: 5k

a/n: ahhh here’s the last part (i think?) anyway sorry it’s long i got carried away but ugh i love remus so much. sorry if my characterization is off, ever since atyd i see him as sarcastic. yeah i love this, hope you guys do too :)

~~~

Out of all the marauders, Remus Lupin was by far the most liked. He was quiet, but not invisible. He was the most sensible out of all the boys and the most polite. Though he did tend to be witty and sarcastic, he was kind at heart. But he was also the hardest one to get close to. Quiet, reserved, beautiful Remus with his nose always stuck in a book. There was always something about him that made girls fall fast. But that was the thing. It was always so easy to fall in love with him. So, if one ever wanted to shag Remus Lupin, they would have to deal with the consequences of loving him. Because he was nothing like his mates. He didn’t shag just anyone. No. He had to choose you. And to be chosen by him was the biggest accomplishment and the biggest curse. Because once you get him, you will never want to let him go.

~~~

Avoiding two of the marauders is nearly impossible. Each corner you turn it seems you run into one of them, or both. And each time their eyes find you they show the same expressions. Confusion. Frustration. Perhaps even a bit of sadness. You debate throwing away the entire plan daily. It’s unfair, the way you’re playing with their minds. But the lingering knowledge that you’re so close to completing the plan entirely keeps you going. Because surely, all your hurt feelings can’t be for nothing.

Right?

You speak to James only once after your shag in the broom closet. It’s a week or two after, he’s been chasing you around, and you’ve been avoiding him. But you decide he deserves some amount of closure. Sweet, lovely, innocent James. You find him alone in the library and take your opportunity. The way he smiles when he sees you approaching makes your heart ache terribly and regret fills your stomach.

“Y/n I’ve been trying to catch you, how are you?” He asks once you’re close enough to hear his quiet tone.

He looks so happy, you feel sick.

“Yeah, I just you know… haven’t been feeling too great,” you lie.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Sit if you’d like, I’ve been attempting to study for the potions test. Aren’t you good with potions? Could you help me possibly?”

You inhale deeply. You could really use a cigarette right now. You’ve broken things off with guys before, but this feels different. In the other cases, you’ve had reasons. For this case though, you have none. James is innocent in all of this. It makes you nauseous.

“Listen, James,” you start, your voice soft. “What happened was great, I enjoyed it a lot, but it was a mistake. I like you, you’re very sweet, but I don’t think we should do anything else.”

Watching his face fall is by far the most horrid sight you’ve ever seen. All the happiness fades fast and leaves behind a bitter frown. He looks down at his papers, toying with his quill.

“I see…” He looks back up, a fake smile on his lips. “That’s alright, it was fun. I’m not really looking for anything serious like that either, so I understand.”

You swallow hard. “I really do like you James, believe me, but it’s just not the right time for this.”

“Don’t worry about it, it’s fine.”

“And...” You pause for a second. “You won’t tell anyone?”

He nods. “Not a soul. This will be our little secret.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course.”

“Well then, I’ll let you get back to your potions. Thanks for... everything.” You give him one last smile before turning on your heels and making your way out of the library.

You almost put an end to it right then and there, but then you see the tallest marauder walking down the hall with Peter. His hands are in his pockets, his book bag slung over one of his shoulders. For a split second his eyes meet yours as the two of you pass each other.

He gives you a small awkward smile.

Fuck.

~~~

To catch Remus Lupin alone you must take the risk of losing your house some points. You wait a week before making your move, for safety. After your conversation with James, the only marauder to pay attention to you is Sirius. He’s still set on telling everyone that the two of you shagged, but thankfully, not many people believe him. Not even his best mates.

It’s a very quiet night when you sneak out after curfew. A night you know one particular prefect is doing rounds on his own. You wander through the castle quietly, making sure to avoid the areas in which teachers lurk. Goosebumps form on your skin, you should’ve worn more than a tee-shirt and sweatpants, but you needed to look casual.

As you’re about to turn a corner, you spot Filch. Panic surfaces inside you and you quickly turn around and run as quietly as you can down the hall. You take a few turns and just as you’re about to relax, you hear a voice.

“It’s past curfew, what are you doing out here?”

Your heart stops for a completely different reason.

It’s him.

You turn to face him and shyly smile. You watch his face change as he recognizes you.

“Oh, it’s you.” He narrows his eyes. “Off to shag my mate again, are you?”

“I never shagged him,” you reply, crossing your arms over your chest. “And I’m out for a completely different reason.”

“What reason is that?”

You shrug. “Personal reason.”

“Ah well, hope it was worth losing your dear Ravenclaws ten points. Get back to your dorm before someone else catches you,” he says, turning away from you.

You watch as he walks down the hall, not giving you another thought. You would’ve replied sarcastically if you could speak for that matter. Once he disappears, all you can do is shamefully make your way back to your house's common room, now understanding why James likes being a chaser.

~~~

Some time passes before you get Remus alone. Each time you see him during the day, he’s accompanied by one of the marauders and you can’t sneak out during his rounds again because your fellow Ravenclaws were not pleased. You’re smoking behind the castle when you happen to finally catch him walking alone. You immediately take your chance.

“Lupin!” You call out to him. You get up from the bench you were sitting on and walk to him.

Thankfully, he stops walking and turns back to face you. “Y/l/n. Is there something I can help you with?”

You can tell from the tone of his voice he’s trying to be polite; it makes your insides warm.

“Yeah, actually there is. I was wondering if you could help me with my transfiguration essay. You’re the smartest lad in the year,” you answer, taking a small puff of your cigarette. You hold it up to offer him a hit, he shakes his head.

“Those things will kill you,” he says. “But I suppose I can help a bit. I assume you’re free right now?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Let me take a look.”

A smirk forms on your lips, and you let out a breath of smoke purposely into his face. “Take a girl to dinner first.”

He swats the air, fanning away the smoke. “Are you going to show me or not? I have things to take care of.”

“Sorry.” You hate the way your face burns. “Come see.”

The two of you make your way to the bench and you take out your essay. Truthfully, you are already finished with it, and you think your work is good. But much to your dismay, only a few seconds after he starts reading it, Remus takes out a muggle pen and begins crossing things off.

“What’s wrong?”

“Your spelling is shit, and you’ve contradicted your argument at least twice already and I’m only on the second paragraph,” he answers, his eyes glued to the paper. “Maybe if you spent more time studying than shagging and smoking, you’d have this information down. We reviewed it a few weeks ago.”

You scoff. “I have not been shagging.”

“Sure,” he mumbles, crossing off another sentence.

“I swear, Sirius is mistaken.” You lie.

He turns his head, his green eyes meeting yours. “Who said I was referring to Sirius?”

Your breath catches in your throat, and you cough due to the smoke. Is he talking about James? Your heart rate increases, and anxiety flows throughout your body. Did James tell? You catch your breath, your eyes meeting his again. He looks unamused.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I haven’t shagged anyone in months, not that it’s your business,” you say.

“You should really practice more on your lying; you are shit at it.” He hands your essay back to you and stands. “I left a few notes of some things you should change, but my biggest suggestion is that you reread the textbook, and perhaps find some more... enticing quotes. Is that all then? Like I said, I’ve got some other business to tend to.”

For a few seconds, all you can do is stare up at him, your mouth hung open ever so slightly. You previously thought Remus Lupin to be a timid boy who went along with the rest of the marauders because he couldn’t say no. Now though, you realize all those assumptions are wrong. He’s quiet, but not timid.

“What do you know?” You question.

“Quite a lot, thanks for the chat.”

Before you can even think of a response, he’s already walking away. You can’t let him slip away again.

“I’ll get it out of you Remus Lupin if it’s the last thing I do!”

He turns his head over his shoulder and chuckles, the sound sending warmth straight to your core. “We’ll see.”

And just like that, he’s gone, and you’re left flustered with rosy cheeks.

You did save the best for last.

~~~

Falling for the third marauder is easier than anything. Almost unconsciously, you begin to fail classes so that he can help you with work, you learn his route around the castle to see him at least once a day, and you sneak around the castle some nights, but he always ends up finding you somehow.

One night, a little over a month after you’ve started your game, something unexpected happens. You’re out after curfew once again, tiptoeing around the castle to see where the tallest prefect is when he appears from behind you. Like usual, he crosses his arms and clears his throat, making you quickly spin on your heels to face him. How does he always sneak up on you?

“How many times am I going to catch you before you start following the rules? I’m sure your fellow Ravenclaws aren’t too pleased with you,” he says. You look up at him, a genuine blush on your face. He narrows his eyes. “You want me to catch you, don’t you?”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

You look away nervously. The plan never involved gaining real feelings for any of the marauders, yet here you were. Standing in your sleepwear after curfew with your heart racing in your chest at the mere sight of one of them. Though you try to deny it, you know deep down you’re crushing hard, and you know it will only end badly.

“I uh... I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m just on a little stroll back from a smoke that’s all,” you reply after a few seconds, your hands anxiously fiddling with one another.

He rolls his eyes. “Listen, I don’t know what your objective is or has been, but whatever it is it’s not going to happen.”

“Remus I-”

“Sirius, I understand, he would sleep with the giant squid if it had tits. But James, really? He may be more of an... active person than myself but he has far more feelings than you think.” He takes a step forward; he towers over you. You swear you can’t breathe. “You may have fooled them, but you don’t fool me. I can see right through you y/l/n and you’re sick.”

You move backward; he follows each step. “You... you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t I?”

Your back hits a wall, panic rises in you. Your eyes fall to his hands, and a bit of relief washes over you when you see he’s not holding his wand. But then another thought takes over. Is he going to hit you? When you look back up, he’s only inches away from you, his hazel eyes piercing down into yours. He places one of his hands on the wall next to your head. You can hear your heartbeat in your ears.

“I didn’t mean to cause any trouble, really. I’m sorry,” you mumble, your words genuine.

“So, what was your goal then? To shag all of us and take your pick of who’s best? Peter would’ve been far easier than James you know,” he replies.

“It was just a stupid idea, I don’t know. It didn’t mean anything deeper I swear.” You’re rambling now, the threat of tears evident in the burning of your eyes. You try your hardest to keep any from falling, you can’t cry in front of Remus.

He sighs. “You’re lucky Sirius is oblivious, and James is trusting. If they knew the truth, you’d have the whole school against you.”

“Wait, they don’t know?”

He rolls his eyes again. “Of course not. If they knew you’d be getting hexed almost all day every day.”

“Then how do you know?”

“I notice a lot more than people think. Did you honestly think no one saw you go up to our dorm with Sirius that night at the party? And did you honestly think none of us would notice James’s change in attitude? You think you know more than you actually do,” he explains.

For a few seconds, the two of you only stare at each other. You don’t know what to think. You should’ve known this would happen. Someone was going to catch on. You wish you had never done it. Any of it. Everything would be so much simpler if you’d simply stayed the quiet Ravenclaw girl who never interacted with the marauders. But you can’t go back, no matter how much you wish you could. You can only make it right moving forward.

“I’m sorry, truly Remus.” There’s so much more you want to say, but you can’t. You can’t fathom the words.

“If you’re truly sorry, stop. I won’t be the next pawn in your game,” he says, his voice slightly lower than before. You watch the way his eyes shift, the way he licks his lips, and moves his head down so he’s almost eye level with you. Your breath catches in your throat. “I suppose I pity you though because you and I both know this has become more than a game to you now.”

You turn your head, but he grabs your chin and forces you to look him in the eye.

“You fancy me.”

“I-”

“Don’t try to deny it. Like I said, I can see right through you.”

“It doesn’t matter. It’s over now,” you whisper, a tear nearly escaping one of your eyes.

He inhales deeply and you notice his eyes trail over your body for a moment before meeting your gaze again. “You’re right. It is over now.”

He lets go of you and backs away and for the first time since encountering him tonight, you feel like you can breathe normally. You stay on the wall, silently catching your breath as he walks further down the hall. But just before he’s about to turn a corner, he looks back at you.

“Or perhaps it’s simply my turn to play with you. Oh, and that’s twenty points from Ravenclaw. Goodnight.”

You fall asleep with his words burning in the back of your mind, and an ache between your thighs.

~~~

After that night, everything is different. You try to avoid them all and go back to the way things were before, you really do. You scribble out the page in your journal with their names, you keep your head down in the halls, and you skip the parties they host. It’s Remus who’s begun playing. Somehow, he continues knowing where you are and appears at random times. Whether you’re studying in the library, and he just so happens to need a book from that section, or you’re out by the lake with your friends and he walks by. You know it’s intentional, but it still manages to leave you hot and bothered each time.

“I thought you said the plan was off?” Your friend says one particular day when the two of you are eating lunch.

You look at her, confused. “It is.”

“Then why has Lupin been staring at you this whole meal?”

Instinctively, you look across the Great Hall and immediately catch those all-too-familiar hazel eyes. He doesn’t look away, at least, not for a moment. He stares at you with no shame, and even from the distance you can sense something different from the look in his eyes. Before you can fully figure it out though, he turns his attention back to the other three marauders.

“Did you shag him?” Your friend asks.

“No, I told you what happened,” you answer, focusing your attention back on the food on your plate. “I wish he’d stop.”

Your friend laughs. “Nah, you don’t.”

You hate how she’s right.

~~~

Nearly two months have passed when you finally confront Remus.

You’re sitting in the astronomy tower, a cigarette between your lips, and a scowl on your face. You can’t take it any longer. Wasn’t he the one who told you off? Wasn’t he the one who told you to stop the games? He was. You know it. So, why has he kept it going? He had said that it was his turn, but that was many weeks ago. How long did he plan to keep this going? You let out a cloud of smoke, frustration taking over your body at the thoughts.

“How many points shall I take off tonight? Forty? Fifty?” You feel him sit next to you, but you refuse to look at him. “You haven’t been out after dark in a while though, I’ll give you that.”

“What do you want Lupin?” You ask, annoyed.

He chuckles. “What do any of us want really?”

You look at him with a straight face, hating the way butterflies take over your stomach at the sight of him so close to you. Despite the scars on his face, you find him more beautiful than any boy. More than James, even more than Sirius. There is something so extraordinary about Remus you can’t explain. You wish it would go away.

“Why can’t you leave me alone?” You question after taking another drag from the cigarette.

“I haven’t spoken to you in over a month, I don’t know what-”

“Yes, you know what I mean.” You cut him off. You exhale your last breath of smoke and throw the cigarette off the tower. “I’m trying to leave this all in the past and move on like you said but you’ve made it quite difficult.”

“Seems you don’t like the taste of your medicine love. It’s hard, isn’t it? Trying to avoid someone when they always seem to end up exactly where you are. It gets rather annoying, doesn’t it? Especially when you secretly enjoy it,” he replies.

Your eyes meet again and that familiar trouble to breathe begins. He’s looking at you in a way you don’t know how to feel about. It’s not like Sirius’s drunken stare or James’s needy stare. No. This one, though the same lustful, is far deeper.

“Just tell me what you want Remus,” you eventually say, your voice lower than before. “What do you want?”

“I want you to get out of my head. I want to look at you and feel nothing. I want everything to go back to how it was before you decided to fuck with my friends and me,” he answers.

You swear your heart stops for a few beats. “Then let all of that happen.”

“You think I haven’t tried?”

You stay silent.

“I never wanted this, any of it.”

You look down. “I know.”

“Don’t do that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Merlin, I give up, you win y/n. You bloody win.”

You’re about to ask what he exactly means, but he acts faster. In the blink of an eye, his lips are on yours. You can’t grasp it at first. You’re kissing Remus Lupin; Remus Lupin is kissing you. The boy who unintentionally caught your heart is kissing you. It’s unbelievable, it’s undeniable, and it’s far from underrated. You don’t hesitate to kiss him back, even through your initial shock.

His hands cup your cheeks, his thumbs stroke your skin ever so gently. You wrap your arms around his neck, one of your hands toying with the hair on the back of his head. He’s a good kisser, very good. That’s why when he parts your lips, you protest.

“Why did you-”

“If we’re going to do this, you have to promise me it’s not a game anymore y/n.”

Your head is fuzzy from how intently he’s looking at you. “I promise Remus, that game has been over for a while.”

“You swear it?”

“I do. Do you?”

“Of course.” There are a few seconds of silence before he sighs, one of his fingers now playing with a piece of your hair. “We have to keep it secret.”

“I know,” you say.

He brushes the piece of hair behind your ear, the intimate gesture sending tingles throughout your body. “I don’t want it to be a quick shag either,” he adds.

“What do you want it to be then?”

The smile he gives you makes your stomach flip. “More.”

~~~

More from Remus Lupin is everything.

After that night, the two of you begin something you don’t exactly know how to name. You would call it a secret relationship, but the thought of that gives you a stomachache. The two of you don’t interact during the day, at least not where anyone else can see. He passes you in the hall as if you’re a stranger, but the second he catches you around a corner in an empty hallway he showers you with affection. And at night when the two of you sneak off, he touches you in ways you never thought possible.

He shows you so many new places in the castle you never knew of. Secret passages, secret rooms, all of it. You never question how he knows all of it, you only hold his hand tighter as he guides you. When he suggests a more secluded place to meet, you of course agree. Though, you never expect that place to be the shrieking shack.

“There’s no way you’re serious,” you say. The two of you are outside, near the Whomping Willow. You make sure to stay out of its reach. “The shrieking shack? That place is haunted, the ghosts don’t even go there because of how scary it is.”

“Obviously I’m not Sirius love, you only shagged him once,” he sarcastically replies, rolling his eyes to emphasize his joke.

“Remus.”

“The shrieking shack is not haunted, believe me, that’s only a silly rumor made so that people won’t go to it. Me, James, Sirius, and Peter go all the time. It has a bed, and given our activities I say we utilize that,” he explains.

You bite your lip. “Are you positive?”

He moves a bit closer to you and places a hand on your shoulder, leaning down so he’s at eye level with you. “You know I would never let anything hurt you, you can trust me.”

“Alright, but how are we supposed to get there so late? It’s in Hogsmeade,” you question.

He chuckles. “Haven’t you learned by now the marauders have many secret ways?”

“Yes, but we’re not in the castle right now how are we to- Remus don’t go any closer you’re going to get hurt you-” You pause, your mouth hung open as you watch the whomping willow go completely still. “How did you...”

“Secrets love, now come, it’s getting late,” he says, holding a hand out to you.

You don’t hesitate to take his hand and follow him into the tree, nothing else is said.

Surprisingly, the walk isn’t too long. It’s dark, gloomy, and a bit cold, but it’s not terrible. At the end of the tunnel, there’s a door. Something in Remus’s posture shifts, almost as if he’s anxious. You squeeze his hand to try to reassure him of whatever he needs, he gives you a smile through the dark that makes your cheeks warm.

The shrieking shack isn’t big, not at all. It’s a simple building with a few rooms and a short staircase. Remus brings the two of you to what you presume is the bedroom though the only indicator is a mattress, blanket, and pillow on the floor. There’s a small fireplace in the room as well, shockingly full of wood and some candles placed near the mattress. The entire shack is creaky and dusty, but you don’t mind. As long as there’s no ghosts, it’s perfect. Remus lets go of your hand and moves to start a fire. You sit down on the mattress and light the candles around.

“What do you guys use this place for?” You ask.

“It’s just a place we come to sometimes when we don’t want to be around other people,” he answers. His back is still turned to you, you could stare at it all day. “Sirius was the first one to discover it wasn’t haunted.”

“Oh? How did he find that out?”

“He’s always been the bravest out of us, though I think he just wanted another rule to break.”

You chuckle. “That sounds like him.”

He finally stands and turns to face you, a bright fire burning behind him. “You would know, you shagged him.”

“Oh, shut up,” you say as you slide off your shoes.

He begins to walk to you. “Can I ask you a question?”

“This context doesn’t seem good, but yes you can,” you reply.

“Be completely honest, out of the three of us, who’s the best?”

He’s standing right in front of you now. You look up at him, a coy smile on your lips, and begin to untie his shoelaces. “You are of course.”

“For some reason, I think your answer is biased,” he says with a laugh.

You trail your hands up his legs after he steps out of his sneakers, stopping once you reach his belt buckle. It quickly gets undone. “What would make you say that?”

He laughs again. “Just a hunch I guess.”

Your moment of control is taken fast when he pushes you down on the mattress, his lips attacking yours. It isn’t a lie though; he is the best. Unlike with Sirius and James, you share such deeper feelings for Remus. Each time he touches you, you practically melt into the palm of his hand. He’s caring. He’s gentle, but rough when need be. Though the two of you argue sometimes, it always is resolved with a hug, a kiss, or a shag. So, in the simplest of words, Remus Lupin is the perfect boy in every way.

All your clothes are discarded quickly, his too. He kisses you deeply as he uses his fingers on you. Sometimes you wonder where he’s learned all his skills from, but even thinking about him with another girl has started to make your stomach hurt. Instead, you focus on how good two of his fingers feel inside you. They’re so long, so slender. More than once in class you’ve been completely distracted by the sight of his hands, specifically his fingers, even more specifically when he’s wearing rings on them. They feel just as you imagine, extraordinary.

When you cum, you’re moaning a mess into his mouth, your body shaking. He milks every last bit of your orgasm out of you before stopping. You watch through heavy lids as he sucks his fingers clean of your cum, the sight makes you audibly groan.

“I need you,” you whisper, running one of your hands through his hair.

“Do you?” There’s something in the tone of his voice mixed with the way he’s looking at you that makes your heart ache in your chest.

You nod. “In so many ways Rem.”

“Promise?”

“Always.”

He moves inside you slowly at first, but he finds a decent pace after a few minutes. Because of his height, you weren’t at all surprised at the size of his cock. It’s by far the biggest you’ve ever encountered and the best. Though sometimes it leaves you sore, it always leaves you in a daze of dopamine.

Remus struggles to keep his head at your level as he fucks you. He presses soft kisses to your forehead, one of his hands intertwined with yours. You’ve never felt such intimacy in your life, it almost makes tears form in your eyes.

“Tell me you’re mine,” he says, his voice shaky. “Even if it’s not true.”

“I’m yours, Rem, completely,” you reply. His hips meet yours harder, and you moan. “All yours I’m all yours.”

Neither of you lasts much longer than that.

In the aftermath as the two of you hold each other, he rests his head on your chest. You run your fingers through his hair softly, the sound of his breathing like music to your ears. It’s at this moment you realize just how deeply you care for him. You hate what you did with that silly plan, but you don’t think you’d change it. If ending up in this moment only came from the plan, you’d do it over a million times.

“Is this real?” Remus asks after some time.

You sigh and press a kiss to the top of his head. “Yes. This is real.”

And so, it is.

[theblackstar04]

oooh okay what about black sisters hcs (or just ramble idc honestly) ?

the black sisters actually make me so insane omg these are just some head cannons i have for them

bellatrix

-she's the eldest of her sisters

-plays croquet and fencing, along with self defense

-joined quidditch in her 3rd year as either a beater or seeker (i haven't decided which)

-genuinely believes in pureblood ideology, especially after hogwarts

-dated rita secretly during hogwarts until she married rodulphus a few years after hogwarts

-her and rita had a on/off relationship, longest they were broken up was a month

-bpd with psychotic features, ptsd, destructive behaviours (especially when she was younger)

-her 'rebellion' is putting 100% into everything. they want her to be a deatheater? she's going to be the most devoted one there is. do well in school? she's getting top scores.

-very extreme with everything she does.

-hated sirius since he was born for getting to be the heir. was both happy and angry when he ran.

-regulus was her favourite until he became the heir

-jealous that narcissa and andromeda were closer with eachother than with her

-used to sing

-she wasn't always 'crazy', but once everyone referred to her that way and acted as if she was, well, its difficult to not become that

-if she was an animagus, she would be a raven

-naturally curly hair, absolutely cannot tame it. black hair

Andromeda

-middle child

-played croquet, didn't care much for any sports

-it was only in hogwarts that she questioned pureblood ideology

-dated ted after 6th year secretly

-ran away after hogwarts with ted

-challenged her families beliefs subtly

-ptsd, osdd 3, extreme paranoia

-was closest with narcissa (and later sirius)

-played the violin

-visited narcissa the night before her wedding, wanting her to run with her. accepted her answer as no, but made sure she knows how to contact her if she ever needs to.

-she does miss her sisters, but knows running was the right thing for her to do

-if she was an animagus, she would be a heron

-naturally wavy/curly hair, very dark brown hair.

Narcissa

-youngest child

-plays croquet, prefers to watch quidditch rather than play.

-doesn't 100% agree with pureblood ideology after andromeda ran, but will never openly go against it

-often got overlooked in favour of her sisters

-she doesn't express emotions loudly like her sisters, but she feels very strongly and deeply

-had a short and sweet relationship with alice before lucius. she wonders what it could've been

-dated lucius in 7th year, got married a year after hogwarts

-ptsd, osdd 4, anorexia (mostly recovered in adulthood, relapsed with the stress of the war)

-was closest with andromeda (and then regulus)

-plays the piano occasionally

-if she was an animagus, she would be a swan

-naturally wavy hair, straightens it. black hair with poliosis making streaks of her hair white. she later starts dying her hair

All of them

-i hc that croquet, fencing, and hunting were all things that purebloods were expected to do

-they were all close during their hogwarts years, before everything went downhill

-the symbolism of three!!

-childhood nicknames for eachother make me cry. "andy" "cissy" "bella"/"trix/ie"

[aphroditelovesu]

Hi can I request poly Regulus and Sirius Black headcannons please?

❝ — 🔮 lady l: hey! I hope you like it, anon! I'm not sure if it's good, but... Well, I hope you like it anyway and appreciate these two wizards! Forgive me for any mistakes and good reading. ❤️❤️

❝tw: obsessive and possessive behavior, jealousy, implicit murder, polyamorous relationships, unhealthy romantic relationships, messy writing.

❝🔮pairing: yandere!regulus black x gender neutral!reader x yandere!sirius black.

Once Regulus and Sirius showed interest in you, there were two options: you were either the luckiest person in the world or the unluckiest. Both were valid, because these two wizards will not give up their darling for anyone.

There's really no way to know which one became obsessed with you first and it doesn't really matter. Regulus won't give up for anything and Sirius is quite committed to getting you all to himself.

The two brothers were never really close, mainly due to the fact that Sirius hated his parents and Regulus followed them blindly and this irritated him deeply. There was nothing that connected them other than the fact that they belonged to the same family and that didn't matter to either of them. Sirius, even if he denies it, wanted to be closer to his younger brother, but when he became interested in you, it changed everything.

Regulus was indifferent towards his brother, he didn't bother him but he didn't please him either, he simply didn't care about him. He aspired to become a Death Eater and there was nothing and no one that would make him give up on his goals.

They lived their separate lives at Hogwarts and that always worked, until you got into the story. Sirius immediately took a liking to you when he met you, regardless of your house, he wanted to be a friend to you and perhaps more than that. He constantly followed you through the halls of Hogwarts and introduced you to his friends and was ecstatic when you all got along. From then on, Sirius' desire for you became more apparent and he became a little possessive of others who came close to you.

Regulus knew he had fallen in love with you the moment he met you. He just didn't know why, but you made him feel something he had never felt before and he craved it. He longed for you. Regulus began to spend more time by your side, inserting himself into your routine, your classes and even your free time, becoming a stalker. He learned everything you liked so he could attract you. Regulus wanted you to trust him blindly and let yourself be guided by him. He would eventually become possessive and very suffocating.

Once they discovered each other's interest in you, things got complicated, especially for you. They didn't want to share you, but they weren't willing to let go of their obsession either. Very reluctantly, Sirius proposed a deal to share you with his brother, even though he didn't want to, he still had your best interests at heart and wanted the best for you. Regulus hesitated, his possessiveness screamed but he eventually ended up accepting his brother's deal, because then he realized that it would be easier for you to love him completely, once you realized Sirius's flaws.

The touches were affectionate and never aggressive. You were the one who had all the control in their relationship and they seemed satisfied with that. The first kiss was shy and a little awkward, you felt strange kissing one brother with the other watching you and waiting to be kissed, but it was a good experience. When your lips touched Sirius's, it was like butterflies exploded in your stomach and all you saw was him. Kissing Regulus had been more possessive and demanding, but nothing that got out of control, his lips were soft and gentle against yours and his arms wrapped around your waist.

Contrary to what everyone thought, the relationship worked very well for some time. They loved you and worshiped the ground you walked on, always taking care of you and spoiling you and their fights were never around you. They were very protective and when any potential threat threatened to get to you, they would deal quickly and definitively.

They wanted you to be comfortable with everything and that included everything from everyday things like drinking coffee to the most intimate activities. Sirius loved watching you, his eyes shining while you did something, while Regulus preferred to participate and loved having you in his arms. Sirius loved kissing your neck and touching the most sensitive places on your body, teasing you. Regulus was more active and liked to be on top and have control, his kisses were possessive and his touches more assertive than provocative.

As more time passed, the more possessive they became and their jealousy was directed at each other like other people. Sirius loved his friends and he knew they loved you, so he always felt embarrassed when he got jealous of them, but he couldn't help being so insecure and afraid of being abandoned by you. You constantly need to remind him that you loved him.

Regulus is the most possessive and his eyes were sharp for anyone who got too close to you and he was ready to commit murder if no one stopped him. Although calm, he still has an icy fury within him and that is dangerous. He's especially jealous of his brother, but he hates it when anyone else comes close to you, to what belongs to him.

They worked well together and the relationship brought them together, although jealousy was still present. There wasn't a day that went by that you didn't know you were loved, the hugs, the kisses, the touching and the gifts were a constant reminder of their love and devotion to you.

Anyone who tries to do you any harm will be eliminated without remorse. They would ally and destroy the bastard who dared to hurt you, you were theirs not only to love but to protect and they would do it with pride and without any regret.

Your relationship was put to the test when Regulus joined the Death Eaters and your heart was shattered, not only because your beloved had allied with them but because Sirius seemed devastated by his brother's choice. You knew they still cared about each other despite Regulus' choices, but they wouldn't admit it and with that choice made, the competitiveness became insane.

There was no longer a deal to be made and you needed to choose between one of the brothers. They would no longer share and the situation had become unbearable to deal with. But you loved them and couldn't choose between one or the other. Any affection they had for each other became empty and ignored and when they begged you to choose one, you cried. You would have to choose and there was no guarantee that they would respect your choice in the end.

[gg-xoxo]

My first shot at writing fan-fiction, because I’ve read way to many for it to be healthy 😂

——————————————————————————

Lily Evans had always prided herself on being independent. She could carry her own books, face her own demons, and fight her own battles. It was just how she was wired. But James Potter? He didn’t just challenge her independence; he wrapped it in a warm embrace and asked to be a part of it.

He didn’t try to smother her fire; no, James made it blaze brighter. He was infuriatingly persistent in the best ways—carrying her bag even after she rolled her eyes, pulling her into his lap mid-argument, and reminding her, in those subtle ways only he could, that letting someone care for you wasn’t a weakness.

On this particular Friday evening, Lily was perched on the Gryffindor common room sofa, legs curled beneath her, a book spread across her lap. James lay with his head resting on her thighs, his glasses slightly askew as her fingers moved absentmindedly through his messy black hair.

“Lils,” James murmured, his voice muffled as he turned slightly to bury his face in the soft fabric of her sweater. “I think this is my favorite thing in the world.

She laughed softly, eyes still scanning the page. “You say that about every new thing we do.”

“Yeah, but this one’s different.” He shifted slightly, his hazel eyes gazing up at her. “This one involves you and me and the best scalp massage I’ve ever had.”

She shook her head fondly, finally lowering her book to meet his gaze. “You’re impossible, Potter.”

“And yet,” he grinned, his hand reaching up to gently take hers, “here you are. Completely smitten.”

Lily rolled her eyes but didn’t bother denying it. She was smitten. Absolutely, head-over-heels, terrifyingly in love with James Potter.

—————-—————————————————————

Later that week, Lily found herself sitting across from Remus Lupin in the cozy Gryffindor common room. The fire crackled between them, and the soft glow of candlelight danced across the room as they sipped on goblets of wine.

James and Sirius had gone off to some wild escapade—undoubtedly involving the Invisibility Cloak and some elaborate prank—but Lily didn’t mind. Nights like these, spent in quiet companionship with Remus, were her reprieve.

“So,” Remus began, swirling the wine in his goblet like he was far older than seventeen. “How’s the love life?”

Lily snorted. “You’re impossible, you know that?”

He smirked. “Just curious. James hasn’t stopped grinning since the day you said yes. It’s almost concerning.”

Her cheeks flushed as she leaned back in her chair. “He’s… he’s something else, isn’t he?”

“That’s one way to put it.”

They fell into comfortable silence, the kind that only years of friendship could forge. Lily appreciated Remus’s quiet presence, his steady demeanor that balanced out the chaos of the Marauders. He was a grounding force in a whirlwind of laughter and pranks.

“I gave him flowers yesterday,” Lily said suddenly, her lips curving into a small smile at the memory.

Remus’s eyebrows shot up. “Flowers? You?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked, feigning offense.

“Nothing!” He held up his hands defensively, though his grin betrayed him. “I just didn’t peg you as the flower-giving type.”

“Well, boys deserve tokens of love too,” she said matter-of-factly, taking a sip of her wine.

“What did he do?” Remus asked, clearly intrigued.

Lily’s smile widened. “He just… looked at them. For ages. Like he couldn’t believe they were his. Then he pulled me into this ridiculous, spinning hug, nearly knocked over half the furniture in the common room.”

Remus laughed, shaking his head. “That sounds like him.”

“Yeah,” she said softly, her heart swelling. “It does.”

——————————————————————————

James Potter had a gift for feeling everything. It was one of the many reasons Lily loved him, but it was also what worried her the most.

When James loved, he loved deeply. When he laughed, it was with his whole soul. And when he took on the burdens of others—whether it was Sirius’s fractured family, Remus’s guilt over his condition, or Peter’s constant insecurity—he felt it all as if it were his own.

Sometimes, it became too much.

Lily found him sitting alone in the Astronomy Tower one night, his shoulders slumped and his head bowed. He didn’t look up when she approached, but the way his shoulders relaxed ever so slightly told her he knew it was her.

“James?” she said softly, crouching down beside him.

He shook his head, refusing to meet her eyes. “I’m fine.”

She didn’t push, didn’t demand he talk. Instead, she settled beside him, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his shoulder.

They sat in silence, the cool night air wrapping around them like a blanket. Slowly, James’s breathing evened out, his head tilting to rest against hers.

“Sometimes I reckon I’m not strong enough for all of it,” he admitted quietly, his voice barely audible.

“You are,” Lily said firmly, her fingers intertwining with his. “You’re the strongest person I know. But you don’t have to carry it all alone.”

He turned to her then, his eyes glassy but filled with gratitude. “What did I do to deserve you?”

“You let me in,” she said simply.

——————————————————————————

For all his bravado and confidence, James Potter was a surprisingly tactile person. He thrived on physical affection—hands brushing, arms around waists, stolen kisses in empty corridors. But his favorite thing, without a doubt, was pulling Lily into his lap.

It didn’t matter where they were or what they were doing. If there was a chair, a sofa, or even just a patch of grass, James would find a way to settle Lily against him.

“James, I can walk, you know,” Lily protested one afternoon as he scooped her up and plopped her onto his lap in the middle of the library.

“Sure you can,” he said, his arms wrapping securely around her waist. “But this is more fun.”

Madam Pince shot them a glare from across the room, but James didn’t care.

“Are you always this ridiculous?” Lily asked, though she made no move to leave.

“Only when I’m madly in love,” he replied with a grin, pressing a kiss to her temple.

She sighed, leaning back against him. “You’re lucky you’re cute.”

“I’m lucky for a lot of reasons,” he said, his tone softening.

——————————————————————————

Lily was stubborn to a fault. She hated asking for help, hated the idea of being seen as anything less than capable. It was one of the things James adored most about her—but it was also the source of their daily battle.

“I can carry it,” she said firmly, clutching a stack of textbooks that looked like they were moments away from toppling over.

“Lily, just let me—”

“No.” She cut him off, her green eyes blazing with determination. “I’ve got it.”

James sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You do realize I’m not offering because I think you can’t do it, right? I’m offering because I want to help.”

“Well, I don’t need help.”

“Merlin, you’re impossible,” he muttered, though there was no malice in his tone. Instead, he reached out and plucked the top three books from her pile before she could protest.

“James!”

“Lily!” he countered, mimicking her tone. “This isn’t about you being strong. I know you’re strong. Stronger than anyone I know. But sometimes, letting someone carry a bit of the weight doesn’t make you any less strong.”

Her shoulders sagged slightly, and James knew he’d won.

“You’re annoying,” she muttered, though the corners of her mouth twitched upward.

“And you love me,” he replied, slinging an arm around her shoulders.

“Yeah,” she said softly, leaning into him. “I do.”

[lupinsversion]

𝐒𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 - 𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥

• summary: when sirius tries to win over reader, but she turns the tables on him.

• contains: sirius black x fem reader, courting, fluff, modern au

• word count: 1.5k

masterlist || requests

Sirius had been trying everything he could to win her over. He had been texting her regularly, leaving her flowers and small tokens of his affection, and he even showed up at her apartment door on occasion to drop off a mixtape or a book he thought she would like.

He was determined to win her over, to prove to her that he was ready for a relationship. But he was also growing increasingly frustrated with the lack of progress.

He felt like he was taking one step forward and two steps back. Each time he tried something new, it seemed to backfire, and he was left feeling more discouraged than before.

He was determined not to give up, but he was staring to wonder if he was doing more harm than good.

He had even resorted to asking his friends for advice. James reminded him to he persistent, while Peter advised him to step back and give her space. Remus had the idea of trying something extravagant, like a big romantic gesture.

But despite their suggestions, Sirius was still feeling stuck.

His thoughts were cut short when a knock suddenly came to his front door. Behind it, she stood, fiddling awkwardly with her hands behind her back. She radiated a mixture of nerves, silently cursing herself for being god awfully stupid and awkward.

His heart stopped as he opened the door and saw her. He had been thinking about her constantly, trying to come up with ways to win her over, and here she was, standing at his door.

He felt a wave of emotions wash over him — relief, happiness, nervousness, and confusion. He didn’t know what to expect, but he knew he wasn’t going to waste this opportunity.

“Hi.” She said almost too quickly, causing her lips to press into a thin line. She was trying to be subtle, helpful in his mission to win her over but now she felt like she was diving head first into cold water.

He felt his heart skip a beat at her simple greeting. He took a moment to look at her, feeling his emotions race through him.

He swallowed the lump in his throat, trying to tamp down the rush of emotions. “Hi.” He replied softly, his voice carrying a hint of nervous anticipation.

“God, this is so stupid.” She ran a hand over her face, whilst the other remained behind her back.

He raised an eyebrow, a hint of confusion in his eyes. He could see the nervousness in her expression, and it only made him more confused and curious. What did she have behind her back? What was she doing at his house? There were a million questions running through his mind, but he decided to ask the most logical one first. “What… what do you mean?” He asked, trying to keep his voice steady.

She suddenly pointed at him, her nerves now controlling her body. “This. You’re the one who is supposed to be winning me over but here I am like some lovesick fool crawling to your front door.”

He felt his face warm at her sudden pointing. He had been spending his whole time trying to win her over, but here she was, saying the exact words that he had been thinking.

He let out a small chuckle, his nerves still fluttering in his chest. “I’ve been thinking the same thing.” He admitted, his voice soft and vulnerable. “But I have to say, you’re a sight for sore eyes. I’ve been hoping you’d come by.”

She huffed. “I don’t do romantic gestures, I’ve never been good at it. I’m twisted… or whatever. I’m not your typical girl who swoons or falls deeply in love too quickly.”

He felt a wave of affection wash over him as she spoke. He felt a new mixture of emotions rise in his chest — amusement, empathy, fondness, and excitement — all mixed together. She was certainly a fascinating creature.

He leaned against the door frame, a small grin playing on his face. “And what if I told you that’s exactly how I like it?” He teased softly, raising an eyebrow.

“Urgh.” She suddenly groaned, throwing her head back slightly before lifting it back up, a hint of vulnerability in her expression. “I don’t do this. This is not me.”

He chuckled, feeling his heart skip a beat. He noticed the vulnerability in her expression, and it only made him want to push a little harder. He could tell that she was trying to fight her own stubbornness, and he couldn’t help but find it endearing.

He reached out, gently tucking a strand of hair behind her ear in a playful yet sincere gesture. His voice was soft and comforting, filled with lighthearted amusement. “So what is this? What exactly are you doing here?”

She pulled her other hand from behind her back, revealing flowers. “This. I know flowers are usually a first from a guy to a girl and I realize that now. So this is stupid. Really stupid. But they’re for you, they reminded me of you.”

Sirius’ heart skipped a beat at the sight of the flowers. He felt gratitude, affection, surprise, and a small hint of amusement. He found the situation to be both charming and hilarious at the same time.

He felt a smile spread across his face. He reached out and took the flowers, inhaling their scent before looking back up at her. “You do realize you’re supposed to be the hard one to win over, right?”

“Yes.” She exasperated. “This is why this whole thing is stupid. Dumb. Corny. Whatever.”

He chucked, a cheeky grin tugging at his lips. He found her exasperated tone to be endearing, and it only made him want to tease her more.

“You know, I’m actually kind of enjoying this.” He said, taking a step closer to her. “Seeing you break your whole ‘I don’t do romantic gestures’ rules and come to my door with flowers for me… It’s doing all sort of things to me.”

“Shut up.” She grumbled with a slight frown.

He chuckled at her frown, feeling a surge of affection mixed with amusement. It was rare to see her vulnerable like this, and he couldn’t help but find it adorable.”

“Is that really all you really have to say? Shut up?” He teased, raising an eyebrow. “Here I am, telling you how cute you are being, and all you have to say is shut up? Now that’s cold.”

“I don’t do this.” She repeated, her feet bouncing on the porch. “This is so out of character for me.”

He couldn’t help but laugh at her nervous fidgeting. He could feel her nervous energy radiating off of her, and it was both cute and endearing. He leaned against the doorframe, his eyes sparkling with amusement. “So I’ve heard you say. You don’t do romantic gestures, you don’t fall deeply in love, you’re not the typical kind of girl… am i missing anything?”

She huffed. “I think you got it all.” She grumbled.

Sirius chuckled, feeling a mix of amusement and fondness. “I forgot to mention that you’re stubborn, opinionated, and determined.” He added teasingly.

“You’re not helping…”

He continued to smile, finding a sick sense of enjoyment from pushing her buttons. He was determined to have her crack, just a little bit. “I’m also a pain the ass, a menace, and a troublemaker, if we’re being specific here.”

“Sirius…” She warned.

He chuckled, realizing he was pushing his luck. He could see the warning in her eyes, and he knew he could go a bit further. “And don’t forget arrogant, cocky, and egomaniacal.” He added, not able to resist pushing her one last time.

“I brought you flowers…” She motioned to the small bouquet. “Isn’t this the part where you kiss me? That’s what happens in the movies.

He felt a jolt of both affection and amusement at her sudden bluntness. “I mean, that’s what would have happened in the movies. But we already established that you’re not the typical girl.” He teased. “What happens in real life is completely up to us. You could tell me to kiss you, I do it, or I could he an ass and ask for a different gift.”

“Now you’re really pushing your luck…”

He chuckled, his amusement growing. He loved the effect he had on her, and he couldn’t help but push a little bit further. “Am I? Am I really pushing my luck? Because that gift was a bit underwhelming.” He teased, knowing full well that he was playing with fire.

“Just kiss me, damnit.” She grumbled.

He felt his heart skip a beat at her demand. He could see the mixture of frustration, vulnerability, and desire in her eyes. It was exhilarating.

“Alright, you don’t have to tell me twice.”

He closed the distance between them, taking a step forward, and without warning, cupped her face in his hands, and captured her lips in a deep, passionate kiss.

© lupinsversion 2024

[maraudersmary]

LILY EVANS’ BIRTHDAY MY TRUE LOVE

in honour of it being lily evans’ birthday today, i want to do a part two of my post from last year!!

my lily evans headcanons pt. 2!

after the prank, lily was the first one to talk to sirius again. in fact, she didn’t ever stop. always being so in tune with others, she knew that despite what sirius did, the worst thing for him was to be abandoned, so she made sure she was there for him.

despite this, she did not make it easy for him. he got the scolding of a lifetime and had to make a very expensive trip to honeydukes to buy remus’ favourites chocolates for when they’re talking again.

when remus inevitably started talking to sirius again, lily was not surprised. she was however surprised when james went so long without forgiving him.

once they entered their proper relationship however, lily found out truly how strong james’ loyalty and sense of morality was.

not shy about being open and honest, will tell you what you need to hear! her friends pretended they hated it but really coveted her advice.

she’s also not shy about getting pleasure. lily evans likes a shag! who cares! (i do it’s important to me that she gets this)

her top three one night stands/flings were: narcissa black, barty crouch jr, and caradoc dearborn…

she is actually a rebel, and just played the ‘straight-laced student’ card so well… she drank in fields at 13, introduced the others at hogwarts to WKD at 14, was almost permanently stoned, eyebrow, bridge, labret, septum all pierced (gold jewellery to match her skin and hair and freckles ofc).

she cared so deeply about her schooling and education, she never let anything get in the way of it, but she had learned the hard way that she needed to allow space and time for everything she loved. that meant her friends, james, weed, art.

her bipolar disorder means sometimes she suffers long depressions, but since telling her friends and gathering their support, they really know how to help her the best they can.

they don’t rush her to ‘be better’, but they all have their things. mary and marlene will just hang out in the room, talking and watching movies and creating a space for lily to join in, but not forcing anything. alice and pete would bake for her, all her favourites. remus would sit in her room with a book and chocolate, they’d often read at the same time, or when things were really bad, he would read to her. sirius, emmeline, and dorcas would bring her work if she couldn’t make her lessons and help her catch up with everything when she couldn’t.

james struggled at first. he wanted to be able to just make everything better for his girl, but it didn’t work like that. he learned to just be what she needed. to hold her, comfort her, lie with her in silence, make a joke.

recommends sirius and james muggle books she thinks they’d like. she loves james but knows he’ll never read them. sirius will though, and they have biweekly coffee dates to discuss the latest read. remus is really jealous.

she had tea and biscuits with professor mcgonagol once a month. they started in fifth year when lily broke down crying in her office once, sharing about her bipolar and how she feels like she can’t cope. now their catch ups are an opportunity for lily to share anything she needs to.

her and dorcas go for walks with their sketchbooks and a zoot each, find somewhere nice to set up, and sketch and smoke. it’s their sacred time.

sometimes remus comes with a book, but no one else is ever allowed to. (a big black dog ran past once though…)

[dufferpuffer]

In what ways would you say Molly and Arthur are different?

Aside from a shared intense love for their children, the ability to command a room and a blazing rage at injustice - a lot.

Molly reacts with emotional fear and defensiveness. Her no. 1 focus is keeping people 'safe', even if it means hurting them - but she doesn't think about the big picture. She just does what feels best at the time and can get explosive when things don't go her way. She wants to control others so her anxieties quieten - even if that means trimming their wings and tying them down.

Arthur reacts with pragmatism, empathy - a more open mind. He is more concerned with the emotional health of people. He isn't reckless but he treats safety practically, not as a gut feeling. Without a fear as deep as Molly's (she can't defeat a boggart) he feels more safe if they are well informed. He hates the idea of tying people down from their wants, whims and dreams.

Arthur can be more passive than Molly - but he isn't afraid or unable to stand up to her, speak against her or reason with her. He is her anchor, cooling her down and pulling her leash, while she drives him forward and keeps him focused.

+ When finding out there was a werewolf in the same hospital room as Arthur - Molly reacted with knee-jerk prejudice. Despite knowing Remus she immediately questioned if he was safe to be around.

Arthur, meanwhile, reminded her it was still two weeks till the Full Moon (aka the New Moon, the furthest time away from Full Moon) and he had already tried to give the werewolf comfort and camaraderie.

+ Molly was against telling Harry about Sirius Black. She thought he would be scared to know the truth, that they should trust Hogwarts to be safer than Azkaban - and trust that Dumbledore and the Dementors can handle everything. She doesn't show much understanding of Harry and is upset when engaging with the concept of Sirius Black at all. 'But no one's really sure that Black's after Harry-'

Arthur puts his foot down and insists he not only has a right to know - but knowing that Harry and Ron are both cheeky wanderers who will find ways to slip out of iron-grips, if they don't fully understand the danger they are in they'll walk right into it.

+ Molly doesn't like Fred And Georges' desire to be business owners. She is constantly questioning them and even destroying their hard work to stamp it out of their heads. She is frustrated that they didn't get amazing OWLs like their brothers, instead 'wasting their time and money' planning and experimenting for their dreams.

Arthur, while still apprehensive about them taking risks - and in general passive regarding his wife's temper - shields them. He warned against them betting their money but allowed it to happen, he told them off harshly for testing a sweet on Dudley but then tried to protect them from their mothers anger... he is less strict about their behavior in general, engaging with the fun of it. They're the first ones to shout 'Dad's back!' when he comes home.

... Not comparisons - just some extra little things I thought of: Molly is appalled by things like Bill's long hair, Muggle medicine being used to try and save her husbands life, gnomes in her garden - she wants things to be controlled to her standards - and 'normal'. She can hate something one minute, like Fleur or her twins' dreams, but flips to loving them deeply when they please her sensibilities. She seems to struggle to understand the strengths of others, or anticipate their viewpoints.

Arthur thinks gnomes are funny, that House Elves deserve better treatment and is sensitive to Muggles in fear and confusion. He can drive, which I think is fun. He doesn't mind bending rules for the sake of fun - if done responsibly. He understands others' strengths and needs and treats them with a high level of importance - he never tries to control, only reason.

Okay this turned into a ramble - one day I wanna do a big meta post on this lol. But this is what you get for now B^)

[itsjaywalkers]

been thinking about the regulus & walburga ivent a mom who wants to be saved post for. days. DAYS laurie!!!!!! because like, to me, walburga is sirius’ devil. he’s not really capable of seeing her as anything else than his abusive mom. incapable of seeing her as a person. which is why it’s ’’’’easier’’’’ for him to leave. BUT REGULUS DOESSSSSSS. regulus sees his mom as a person and he loves her in this deeply twisted way and cant leave and/or abandon her because he’s just. cursed. to also see her as a person. ive been feeling so sick over this and it’s all your fault……..

JEN!!!!! I FEEL YOU!!!!! THEY HAVEN'T LEFT MY MIND FOR A SINGLE SECOND!!!!!

i agree with u, i think sirius sees walburga as his abuser, as a monster. even if there might a part of him who sort of . still craves her love and approval, he can't see past the abuse. he's able to leave the family, turn his back on her and cut all ties. stop seeing her as his mother even. he doesn't think walburga can be saved, and even if she could be, sirius probably wouldn't want to. he doesn't think he ever loved him, and he can't forgive her

regulus, however.. not only does he love walburga, he also wholeheartedly believes she loves him back. even if it's in her own fucked up way. that's one of the reason why he stays, i think. he's loyal to a fault, and family is always the most important thing for him (he's a black after all). at the end of the day, and despite all the wrong she's done and all the pain she's caused, walburga is still a person to regulus. she makes mistakes and she hurts him, but she's his mother. everything she does is out of love for him. that's enough for him to forgive her. or, maybe not exactly forgive her, but to endure. and deep down, regulus thinks he can save her. he wants to, more than anything, but the truth is that she doesn't want to be. she doesn't believe she needs to, but even if she did, she wouldn't allow it

that's why i loveeee to explore reg's dynamic with his parents, especially with walburga. i have a few stories in which he leaves with sirius, or leaves after him, and also cuts all ties etc. but in my True Version of regulus.. he can never abandon them. even if he ends up moving out or reconnecting with sirius, he always keeps in contact with both walburga and orion. he can't help it. those are his parents, and he's always gonna love them, despite the ugly and despite the pain, because that's what family is supposed to be, to him!!!

[fefifofoggy]

The Marauders as The Soldier, Poet, King Meta

So, I don't know if anyone's ever thought about this song with the Marauders specifically. But as a sidenote I like listening to music on my way to classes and I ran across one of those 'and you were a fairy' playlists with the first song being The Soldier, Poet, King by The Oh Hellos.

Anyways it made me think of MWPP and which lyrics would represent who.

The King

I don't think that this comes as a surprise to anyone, but I feel James has this spot claimed. The ruler is the most important, he is the king. Everything he says or does can have either a negative or positive impact on the people and his subjects. It was a positive impact for his friends. They remember him in a good light, he can essentially do no wrong and if he does then it can always be explained away for this or that reason. He was the shining sun and the warmth that all the Marauders felt cocooned in. Prongs was their King.

“No, I think you’re like James,” said Lupin, “who would have regarded it as the height of dishonor to mistrust his friends.”

James was protective and loved deeply those that were his. He was honorable, he had a very black and white view of the world from what we know of. The king who found nothing more dishonorable than not trusting his closest friends--the ones he became illegal animagi with, the ones he created a secret map with and the same ones that he went gallivanting through the woods under a full moon with.

There will come a ruler Whose brow is laid in thorn Smeared with oil like David's boy

(Yes, this is a reference to Christianity, to Jesus and his brow laid in thorns while put on the cross to die.)

But, I also like to think of it and how this would apply to James. There will come a ruler -- he and Lily are a part of a Prophecy; those who have thrice defied Voldemort, with a summer born child. A Prophecy that they go into hiding for, a Prophecy that could kill them. Yet, it wasn't the Prophecy that killed them, but a betrayal of trust.

The Poet

Sirius Black, the poet.

I feel that this might be contested--maybe a lot of people would think this is the role that Remus would slide into, since he already fits into dark academic aesthetic and fandom portrays him as a voracious reader. (Not to mention the way he talks and how he will weaponize his words)

But I think the Poet is Sirius Black.

There will come a poet Whose weapon is His word He will slay you with His tongue

Born and raised a pureblood to the House of Black, likely slotted to become the next head of his house after his father or grandfather. We see from Walburga's portrait during OoTP that she had a virulent tongue, a trait that Sirius inherited from her. We see it in the train car during their first meeting.

“Where’re you hoping to go, seeing as you’re neither?” interjected Sirius.

Between MWPP, Sirius has always been the one to use his words to cut people the most.

“There’s enough filth on my robes without you touching them,” said Black.

Picking at people's hygiene, cleanliness, looks, abilities, or intellect--nothing is/was too far for Sirius.

“Before Wormtail wets himself from excitement.”

That's how he talks to a friend once he's gotten annoyed? What about his enemies? Or those he considers beneath him? (Which are typically those he doesn't find to be intellectually stimulating to him, as we've seen and a few other people on here have pointed out.)

More than half the time, Sirius' chosen weapon is his words. He is the type of character to point out flaws, weaknesses, things that he knows will hurt the most because he wants to make you bleed.

(And to think, these quotes aren't even some of the worst things he's said, I just couldn't find the quotes that I wanted and didn't want to leaf through my bookshelf.)

The Soldier

I know this will most definitely be an unpopular opinion, but I couldn't decide between Peter or Remus as the soldier. So, I put them both in this section, but I am more partial to Peter.

Remus as the soldier because of his status as a werewolf.

There will come a soldier Who carries a mighty sword

His lycanthropy is his sword, and he is one of Dumbledore's soldiers because of his ability to enter werewolf rings as a spy. It's a heavy burden but one that (as Lupin says) only he can bear.

But that is two of three lines, and he doesn't quite fit the soldier role to me.

Peter does, however.

Sure, he's not a brave soldier, the one that movies are made about--and he doesn't have a strong sense of wanting to fight for the little guy.

But he is still a soldier. The soldier who joined because his friends signed up for a war and he didn't want to be alone. The soldier who thought that maybe, just maybe, he could cruise on throughout the war because he's not particularly useful or strong or politically important in any way. He's just another foot soldier.

Until he is important, and he realizes that he doesn't want to die. He's fresh out of school, he followed his friends into a war because maybe they convinced him (or he convinced himself) that this would be a summer thing or a couple years at most and it'll make for a decent story for his future kids or grandkids when he can say, "Yeah, I fought in the war--on the winning side."

But then he is faced with a choice: living as a turncoat or dying.

Nobody wants to die. Certainly not Peter who is barely in his twenties at this point. He hasn't lived. Didn't have a girlfriend, wasn't married like James was. Did he even want to get married? What if he wanted to travel the world?

We don't know.

So, spying? On his friends, on his comrades, on people who look him in the eye and think they can trust him. And it turns out that Peter is kind of good at it. He's remained undetected for a while. Hell, Sirius thinks its Remus and Remus thinks its Sirius. Nobody ever suspects Peter.

After all, why would they? It's not like he's ever been anything more than a coward, right? James and Sirius' tagalong. Peter couldn't hurt a fly, not when he was the fly.

There will come a soldier Who carries a mighty sword He will tear your city down

First his sword was his secret as a spy.

Then he becomes a Secret Keeper. The Secret Keeper.

A Fidelius Charm was advanced magic. Voldemort could make out with the Potter's living room window and still not know they were on the other side, unless--

Unless someone with the key to the city let him in.

Tearing a city down had never been easier.

[wrongcaitlyn]

do you have any jegulus fic recs??

YES ABSOLUTELY

it's been a bit since i've read jegulus fics bc the solangelo hyperfixation has been so strong but i still have plenty bookmarked!! i'm just going to share my favs of my favs, but i have even more (21 total) bookmarked on my ao3 :)

(also, just gonna put this right here, that i 100% would rec crimson rivers, best friend's brother, and just lovers by bizarrestars, and art heist baby! by otrtbs but i feel like everyone in the jegulus fandom has already read those bc they're pretty much classics, so just know!! i love those fics!! but i'm gonna try and rec some other possibly less known fics here :))

ALSO ALSO - all of these authors have incredible other fics and i highly recommend you check out their entire dashboard!!! for literally every single author on this list. i'm subscribed to all of themjkdf

You Signed Up For This by Solmussa

James and Regulus have a summer fling that they promised their friends they wouldn’t have. Remus and Sirius discover their mutual hatred is just pent-up sexual tension. Dorcas and Marlene are always winning, even when they’re not. It’s a cruel summer for all. first of all i'm extremely attached to this fic bc it introduced me to maisie peters, which led to one of the best concert experiences of my life!! but other than that, this is just so beautifully written, so detailed, and an all-around incredible fic. everything by this author is incredible too!! it's got the perfect balance of angst vs fluff and just summer vibes, which is prob the perfect thing to read right now - anyway, DEF read if you haven't already!!

Mastermind by pieceofchocolate

Regulus Black is the mastermind behind the Liberal party. Unfortunately, he’s never been very good at the more outgoing parts of politics – on a more fortunate note, he has his brother to act as a front figure. Sirius Black has always been the sweetheart of British politics, charming the voters with his wit and charisma. That was until James Potter came around, becoming party leader of his own party, the Leftists. Sirius would probably hate him, if they weren't such good friends. Regulus does not share this problem. Remus Lupin literally just needed a job, and got thrown into the mess of secrets, games and an upcoming parliamentary crisis. With an election around the corner, things are bound to go awry. MCD WARNING but so worth it. like genuinely. it's a painful fic but there's also a good dose of fluff and i enjoyed every single second of reading despite it being politics and.. well, i'm from america so you can probably guess that it was very strange to actually be attached to these characters while they were politicians😭 this one's also so well written and - there are fics where you can just tell that the person cares so deeply about the topic they're writing about, and this is one of them!!! i love finding fanfics where authors are just incredibly passionate about the subject/au OH and it has a taylor swift title. so like. yk it's already gonna be good. (this is also actually one of my favorite songs ever so i was soo excited to read)

blue and yellow skies by alarainai

Quidditch Rivals turned Quidditch Lovers. That's what the world sees them as, at least. Too bad Regulus hates James Potter's guts, and James? Well, it doesn't matter what he feels about their definitely fake, definitely emotionless relationship. c'mon. there had to be one fame au on this list. and i KNOW that this one's sports, but it's so so so fucking good - and i'm gonna be honest, i've read so many of the band au's (there are quite a lot in this fandom, even i've written one) but for some reason i didn't have any of them bookmarked - which tbf, i'm very selective with what i bookmark lmfao but!!! this one is just SO good the plot, the social media aspect, the background wolfstar, just 10/10 fic!!

these violent delights (have violent ends) by damagecontrol

titanic au prepare for pain. MCD warning. but like, the pain is written so well, and it's so heartbreaking, and i literally remember staring at the ceiling after reading this (finishing at like 2 in the morning) and just not being able to think of anything but that ending, and like, you KNOW that you're going to be in pain bc it's a titanic au, but like, GOD it's so good. i genuinely don't even have the words i'm still depressed bc of it (but in a good way)

The Mystery of the Pears by sonwar

In the cave, Regulus doesn’t beg for it to stop. He begs not be left behind, alone. Perhaps this is why, when Kreacher gives one last look over his shoulder and sees terrible, pale hands reaching for his master, he appears in a flash at Regulus’ side, clutches him by the elbow, and Apparates them both out of the cave, directly disobeying his master’s last order. canonverse fic!! and such a lovely au. the romance between them is just so natural, and yet there's still the war going on - but really, it's just so well written, despite all the angst of the war, imo it's just such a feel-good fic. love this one so much.

Only the Brave by Solmussa

A fic about two idiots falling in love (x2 because there's wolfstar, too) during a war, and the sacrifices they'll have to make to survive it. andddd this one's the big one. this one's the one i choose to accept as canon. like. GUYS. THIS ONE'S SO FUCKING GOOD if you haven't already and you're a jegulus fan, you just HAVE to read it like genuinely. the plot is so well-thought out, all of the interludes give these other characters their own stories too, and the angst!!! but also the badassery!!! i can't even explain it but if you want a canonverse war au where jegulus survives and they all win, then, like, this is the one. it's so perfect. prob my fav jegulus fic of all time.

and those r my recs!! hope that you enjoy them, and i have several others in my bookmarks!! i've also written some if you haven't checked those out, but!! happy reading :) thank you for the ask!

[lottiebagley]

'Tis the damn season- Sirius Black

If I wanted to know Who you were hanging with While I was gone, I would've asked you It's the kind of cold Fogs up windshield glass But I felt it when I passed you

She felt weird being there, an intense feeling of guilt. She hadn't meant to leave. Really, it was the last thing on her mind at first. But everything felt claustrophobic, like the walls were closing in on her. Things with Sirius were in a weird place and really she wasn't 100% sure how to handle it. Then, all of a sudden, she had this job offer. It was temporary, 6 months in New York and she needed something that felt new and alive and she wanted to be far away from Sirius. Now everything had changed because 5 years later and she still lived an ocean away. 

Remus was a teacher now. Lily and James were married with a kid and trying for another. Marlene was thinking about filing for divorce. 

They weren't kids anymore. They were in their mid 20's. 

She was home for Christmas. She didn't have family in New York nor England, but as they had every year prior Lily and James demanded she spend the holiday at their place. 

"God I'm so glad you're here!" Lily is squealing, arms flung around her friend in the busy airport. Little Harry, who's 4 now is clinging to his godmothers leg with gleeful giggles 

"Hey Lils," She smiles, a soft smile, as she returns the hug. Leaning down to pick Harry up "How's my little trouble maker?" She questions, propping the dark haired boy on her hip as she grabs her suitcase, listening to the child's babble and responding when needed as her and Lily make their way to the Potter's car. 

Harry is babbling excitedly from the backseat, about father christmas and presents and chocolate, as Lily attempts to join the stream of traffic leaving the car park

"James is so sorry he couldn't come with us to pick you up, he got called into work last minute," Lily apologises as they start the hour long drive back to her home. 

"Prongs knows I don't mind Lils, and so do you. Just grateful to have somewhere to spend Christmas," 

"And you should know we would never let you spend it alone," Lily reminds, her friend smiling softly. 

"I do know that," She reassures. It was true. She'd grown up next door the Potter family, so inevitably James was one of her best friends. When they both made Gryffindor they stuck together, as everyone who knew them expected. They had their little group which eventually adopted her dorm mates, Lily, Dorcas and Marlene after Lily and Severus stopped speaking. 

It had been content, the war was fought and they survived.

 The friendships survived too for the most part the only lingering awkwardness being the one shared by her and Sirius. They never dated, technically, but they were in love. Utterly deeply in love. They had been since they were 15 and though they never actually confessed it, never allowed their friendship to blossom into something more, they both knew it. Sirius was her first kiss, her first time. He took her to dances and picked her up from class and she painted his quidditch number on her cheek for each game and stroked his hair. It wasn't a relationship, but in all ways but labels it was, which led to inevitable drama. It was unsustainable but nothing changed, they both knew it was why she left.  

"You can ask y'know," Lily comments, eyes ever so briefly flickering to glance at her friend knowing the thoughts in her mind.

"Don't think I wanna know the answer," She shrugs, glancing out of the window. "Is he gonna- y'know," She trails off embarrassed to admit seeing him again had been on the forefront of her mind. 

"Yeah he's spending the holidays too," Lily confirms, watching as her friend nods and knowing better than to ask her what she's thinking.

"Is he..." She trails off not entirely awkwardly, Lily glances at her intense eyes and a knowing smirk "Does he. I- A date? Is he bringing someone of the holidays?" She lets the question spill out 

"No," Lily informs simply, she doesn't offer anything else, changing the conversation quickly. 

There's an ache in you Put there by the ache in me But if it's all the same to you It's the same to me

She'd known she was going to see him, with Lily's confirmation in her mind. She didn't know though, how she felt about it. Excited and nervous all at once, would he hate her? would he have moved on? Just because he wasn't bringing someone for the holidays didn't mean he didn't have someone.

She hadn't expected though,  to see him quite so quickly. The car pulls into the drive and she knows immediately that he's there, motorbike tucked at the end of the drive way and the door is being pulled open by him. His hair is a little longer, though she hadn't seen him since last Christmas so she could have predicted that. He's clad in a warm looking jumper and some sweatpants, clearly cozy inside the comforting home. 

"There's my little man!" He's cheering, wide grin, as he rushes to open a giggling Harry's car door, quickly fetching the child from his car seat and lifting him into a tight hug. 

She wonders, briefly, if he was concentrating on not letting his eyes fall to her, or if maybe that magnetising need to look at each other wasn't there anymore. For him at least. She still can't imagine a view on earth she'd rather look at than that of Sirius Black. 

"Thought you were coming tonight?" Lily questions, she's helping the girl with her bags but her eyes are watching Sirius, watching as he seems adamant on not looking at the girl who's staring at him so desperately Lily thinks she looks as if she could combust. 

"Regulus' new girlfriend is a bore," Sirius shrugs, he knows he should greet her, that it's awkward not too, after all they are spending the next week in the same house. But he doesn't want to be the first to say something. He didn't leave. He didn't not return any calls.

"Hi Sirius," Her voice is timid and as much as he's glad to hear it, to see she's here, she's here and well and not got some boyfriend to spend her holidays with he hates it. Hates that she is reserved around him now. 

"Hey, good flight?"

"Fine, crying baby but no turbulence," 

"That's good then, aside from the crying obviously," he feels like an idiot the second the words have left his mouth

"Yeah," 

"Cool," he wants to curse whoever has decided now would be a good time to  remove every word he has ever known from his mind and leave him a boring, lifeless shell. 

"What about you? How was Regulus?" 

"Fine got a new girlfriend,"

"Heard she's a bore," The girl jokes and Sirius smiles, a real smile. Wondering, for a moment, when he last didn't have to force a smile. 

It's then that Harry begins to whine, Lily swooping in to get him inside and get him a snack. The small moment effectively ruined.  

So we could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now And it always leads to you and my hometown

The house is cold, it hadn't been the whole evening, upstairs and tucked in the spare bed she hadn't been. James had insisted she take the guest room. He'd assured time and time again that Remus and Sirius didn't mind her having it. Remus was going to have a blow up bed in the office and Sirius was taking the couch. She had consistently tried to take either sleeping situation, feeling bad to be the one taking the bed. The offer was refused. 

She's humming softly, some Christmas song that had been stuck in her head for days having heard it so many times recently. Her hands make light work of pouring milk into a pan, the lights in the kitchen set to dim. 

"Let me guess, hot chocolate?" His voice is velvety, not at all laced with sleep. She wonders if he was laid awake too, thinking about how she was directly above him, so close yet impossibly far. 

He had been. 

"You know me too well," She agrees, voice soft. She doesn't turn around, feels almost embarrassed to be clad in reindeer print pj bottoms and some old jumper she'd had forever. 

"You just haven't changed since we were eleven," He returns, leaning on the door frame. 

"You want one?" She asks, moving towards the fridge to take out the milk once more. 

"I got it," He announces. She nods, lets him cross the room to take out the milk, instead taking out another mug, and dumping 2 tablespoons of hot chocolate powder into it.

He arrives by her side, placing the milk down alongside a can of whipped cream. 

"Pretty sure that's for Harry's special christmas eve hot chocolate, the one with a flake and marshmallows and smarties," She comments, her tone is soft, the adoration she has for the child evident. 

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him," Sirius shrugs, he watches as she carefully adds more milk to the stove, "Just promise you won't tell on me yeah?" 

"Your secret's safe with me," She confirms, she looks at him then. For the first time since he entered the room. He's already looking at her. With a look she can't read and so much intensity she wonders if anyone has ever looked at her like that before. He looks beautiful though, glowing in the soft lighting of the room. 

"Y'know, I still do this every time I can't sleep," She informs him, eyes sincere and voice quiet, almost lost in the night. 

He knows what she's trying to say. It had started when they were kids, he'd found her in the common room late at night on the second day of school. They'd spoken a little, but she'd stuck to James like glue, quiet when he wasn't by her side. She'd looked at him, wide glassy eyes. He'd asked what was wrong and she'd whispered to him about feeling like she was never going to belong in Gryffindor, not even at Hogwarts. He'd comforted her, wiped her tears away and helped her sneak to the kitchens, acting confident when in reality he'd never done it before either. He'd made the hot chocolate and she'd sat on a counter, he made her laugh and she suddenly felt like maybe everything would work out, like she might belong here after all. 

It had become ritualistic for them. If one of them was sad they'd sneak to the kitchens and make hot chocolates and vent and cheer each other up. 

Her first break up. 

His bad fight with James. 

Her dad passing. 

His parents. 

The war. 

"I do too," He'd said quietly. Looking away now, almost like her words had hurt him even though it was the last thing she intended to do. "Milk's done," He adds, he wanted to leave the room, he was scared. Scared if he stood there, looking at her all domestic and cosy and glowing and beautiful, he wouldn't be able to resist the urge he'd been fighting since she climbed out of the car that morning. 

I parked my car Right between the Methodist and the school that used to be ours The holidays linger like bad perfume You can run but only so far I escaped it too Remember how you watched me leave But if it's okay with you It's okay with me

Her legs are curled under lap, almost cat like in the large arm chair. Remus in next to her, sprawled across the sofa with the crossword of the day from some muggle paper in his hands. 

She has one too, in her lap, though she's hardly looking.

"Ok, I'm at a wall. Trade me," Remus announces, leaning across to hand her the paper he had been working on 

"Huh?"

"Trade me?" He questions, eyebrows furrowing at her despondent face.

"Right," She nods, switching papers with him. 

He looks at her crossword, hardly started and suddenly he feels bad. 

"You okay?" He asks, he glances out of the window she's clearly looking out of. Sirius is out there, leather jacket and a loose scarf. He's laughing, head thrown back and eyes crinkled. Helping Harry, who Lily had bundled up extra tight, to build a snowman. 

"Fine," She confirms, pulling her eyes away from Sirius to look at her friend. 

"I can only imagine how hard this is for you," Remus says gently

"I'm okay," She shrugs. Remus nods, not sure what to say. It felt like a theme recently. In the 24 hours she'd been there Lily, James and Remus had all struggled. Not sure what to say to either of their friends. They clearly missed each other, clearly pined for each other. Yet, neither of them was doing anything about it, neither of them even wanted to talk about it. 

"You know he never wanted kids," She speaks quietly, head motioning outside. "It was weird. I always thought he'd be a great dad. Still, think he would. I just- I guess I got it. His parents were-well, y'know- and I understood him not wanting to repeat that, thinking he'd be like him, his dad I mean. He wouldn't though. He'd have been a good dad. Still could be I guess," 

"I think so too," Remus confirms, eyes traveling to watch his friend as he helps Harry to roll a head for his snowman.

"I get that he was scared, just think it's a shame," She comments. She turns back to her crossword, to Remus' familiar scrawl. She'd said too much, she didn't want to put anyone in the middle of things.

"You're wrong," Remus speaks, still watching Sirius

"How so?" 

"He wanted kids. He talked about it a bit," Remus explains, watching as she turns to look at him face contort with confusion, "Said he wanted them after the war.  A boy first, then a girl,"

"He'd be a good girl dad," 

"Didn't seem to care too much," Remus shrugs, "He just wanted a family. Everyone to be happy and healthy and safe. Said he wanted a daughter cause he thought she'd look like you," 

"Me?" 

"Who else would he have had this fictitious family with?" Remus shrugs 

"Sirius didn't want to settle down, we all knew that," 

"If you'd asked he would have done,"

"Remus-" She sighs

"You know I'm right. He'd have done anything you asked," 

"That's not fair, I wasn't even his girlfriend," 

"Sorry. I'm not trying to put anything on you. I'm just saying, he would have done anything you asked. Think he probably still would," 

"I asked him to be my boyfriend. He said no," She states simply. She'd asked too early, that's what Sirius had always said. To ask right before a war was starting, when their lives were so imminently in danger. The label would make something happening to either of them so much worse, it's what he'd said when he rejected her.

Remus wants to say that if she'd asked again, asked after the war, that Sirius would have said yes. That he'd have married her on the spot if it's what she'd wanted. That Sirius had told him that the day before she left. But Remus decides it's not fair to put that on her. She left and Sirius stayed and either one of them could have changed everything. 

"Let's talk about something else," Remus decides.

We could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now

Lily was stressed, that much was clear. Her hair was messy and Harry was whining on her hip. The kitchen a mess around her. James wasn't much better. Somewhere outside with Remus and Sirius, a desperate attempt to try and construct the goddamn gazebo. 

"Lil, everything okay?" Her friends voice speaks from the doorway 

"Oh hey, I didn't hear you get back," Lily speaks, her voice a little quick and eyes wide as she turns around, Harry starts to let out a whine and Lily's eyes screw shut. 

Her friend is quick, reaching out to the toddler and distracting him quickly when she passes him his dinosaur toy from the kitchen counter. "What can I do?" 

"Remind me to never listen to James and agree to host a stupid Christmas Eve party next year?" Lily questions, she's moving quickly back to the counter. Stirring the chocolate that's melting in a pan for dessert, momentarily abandoning the vegetables she had been cutting. 

"Okay, and for right now?" 

"I hate food cooked with magic, but this is hard and I have a thousand things to do and no time and-" Lily complains, eyes starting to turn glassy 

"Lily, sweetheart, you are gonna be fine. Delegate okay? I chop a mean carrot," 

"No, you're a guest and-" 

"Lil, what do you need?" 

"Can you run to the supermarket?" 

"Done," The girl nods, scribbling the list Lily recites onto an old envelope 

"Take one of the boys with you, there's going to be a million bags," Lily instructs, pointing out her car keys as she turns back to her food prep "You're the best," She calls after her friend. 

The silence in the car is awkward, they both hate it, because before all of this silence between them was never anything but comfortable. She has so much she wants to say and he does too, yet neither of them can even begin to find the words they would need. 

"Got a lot to get?" Sirius questions from the passenger seat, fingers tapping anxiously at his thigh. 

"There's a list in my bag," The girl answers, suddenly questioning if she'd come off blunt, she hadn't intended to. 

"Can I?" He questions, head tilting to the tote bag on the back seat, unaware whether they were at an appropriate level to go  rifling through each others bags.

"Sure," She agrees, he leans back, grabbing the bag and pulling it onto his lap. 

He rifles through the bag for the list, trying to ignore the de ja vu the bag causes, her essentials the same as they were in her high school bag. 

"You're a shit driver y'know?" he teases, looking up from the list when she takes a turn much too quickly, jolting him in his seat 

"Maybe I had a really bad teacher," She shrugs in response, they both find their minds running to the summer Sirius had taught her to drive, her home opposite the Potter's allowing them to hang out every vacation. 

"At some point you can't teach someone, trust me I tried," 

"You gave up,"

"Well at the time I was a glorified taxi service,"

"I'd say private chauffeur," She corrects, he smiles lightly 

"I'm driving home," 

"Okay," 

Time flies Messy as the mud on your truck tires Now I'm missing your smile, hear me out We could just ride around And the road not taken looks real good now And it always leads to you and my hometown

The black dress sparkles a little in the light of the guest room, ending at her thighs and tight to her body she turns a little in the mirror, she was running a little late but it had taken forever to get her hair to fall right. 

She thought maybe she'd dragged out getting ready a little too long. The party had started downstairs, there was so many people. People from school. People she didn't know, new friends and colleagues. Her friends, all of them. Yet it was daunting. She thinks maybe it was the thought of Sirius, Sirius all dressed up because she just knew he'd look perfect. Sirius flirting with some girl he'd invited, or one of James' colleagues or someone from school. 

She'd been drinking wine as she got ready, something she'd done to ease her nerves but now she almost regretted. Feeling a little tipsy and overly emotional, the idea of watching Sirius with someone else left her feeling a white hot anger in her very soul. A feeling she knew was incredibly unjustified, yet she couldn't push it away. 

It's why, as she walked into the decorated living room, bee lining to Marlene, who was squealing at the sight of her well missed friend, she was glad to see Sirius was in the corner of the room playing with Harry.

She spends hours catching up with friends, making polite chit chat with people from distant memories, smiling and exchanging pleasantries with strangers. She allows some guy from Lily's work to flirt with her but doesn't give anything back. 

 She watches Sirius from afar. He looks beautiful, so utterly beautiful. He's dressed in a white shirt that's tight around his form, the top few buttons undone and his blazer abandoned somewhere. 

He spends as much of his night as he possibly can with Harry, staying with the kid until he's tucking the sleeping boy into his bed. Partly because he firmly believes Lily and James deserve a night off, partly because it's the perfect alibi. 

After that Sirius tries to float, doing little jobs to help things run smoothly and using a plethora of excuses to excuse himself from conversations. He feels rude, particularly to a girl from school who he is sure is nervous to approach him. He isn't rude. But he thinks maybe it comes off that way. 

He's not sure is it's just that it hurts to see her so okay, head back laughing with her friends. Or maybe it's just how drained he's felt all day. 

He grabs a bottle of champagne and his blazer, sneaking outside and to sitting on the floor round the side of the house. Out of sight from any windows. He digs through his blazer pocket for a packet of cigarettes and a lighter, a habit he's been trying to drop but honestly was struggling with. 

Its 5 minutes of silence before he is the slight click of heels on the floor. He holds his breath, hoping to not be found. She rounds the corner and he exhales. Feeling less drained just at the sight of her. 

"Got a light?" She questions, Sirius nods and watches as she crosses towards him, cigarette in one hand and glass of champagne in the other. She holds the cigarette out to him and he lights it for her. "Mind if I sit? Or I can go smoke in the back garden and we can both pretend the other person isn't out here?" 

"Sit," He says simply, she nods, sitting next to him on the cold ground, Remus had shovelled snow all afternoon. "Since when did you smoke?"  

"Since 2 years ago, I had some project due at work and I was crazy stressed. Some guy I work with offered me one and I accepted. Stupid looking back," She informs simply.

"It's bad for you," 

"I've been telling you that since we were 17," She reminds

"Been trying to quit," He admits, watching her as she stares at him. Her eyes are slightly hazy, he can see she's drank a little too much but she's holding herself together gracefully. 

"That's good. I have too,"

"Good," He nods, he watches as she inhales and exhales and sips her champagne. 

"Why are you out here?" 

"It was too much in there," Sirius admits, she nods in quiet understanding 

"I get that," 

"You always did. Get me," He sighs, almost wishfully 

"I guess so," 

"Do you regret leaving?" He asks. He thinks maybe he shouldn't. That come morning maybe he'll regret it. But there's something about the way she looks in the moonlight. The way she's been looking at him since she came outside, and how it's the same way she's always looked at him. 

"I'm really proud of my career. I wouldn't have it if I had stayed," She's careful in her words, he can see her thinking about them before she speaks

"Right." He nods, her words in his mind are a polite rejection. 

Sleep in half the day Just for old times' sake I won't ask you to wait If you don't ask me to stay

"Merry Christmas!" James' voice is loud as he enters the guest bedroom, flipping the light on without a care in the world

"I hate you," She states simply, they grew up together and James really was the closest thing she had to a brother. He smirks watching as she uses the thick sage green bedding to cover her eyes from the light.

"I know. Haz wants you to come downstairs so we can do gifts," 

"What time is it?"

"6. He's been up since 4," James informs, she pulls the duvet down from her face to see him leaning in the door way 

"Fine," She agrees stretching a little before clambering from the bed. The matching Christmas pjs Lily had purchased for everyone bunched up a little. 

"Hey, you doing okay? With Sirius I mean," James' voice drops low as he asks, eyes scanning the landing behind him briefly

"I'm fine," She can tell from the look on his face he doesn't believe her "Promise," 

"Mooney said he saw you guys sneaking back into the house last night. At the party," she hates the way his voice sounds hopeful

"We were both having a smoke James. It's nothing," 

"Thought you were quitting,"

"You sound like your mother,"

"Harsh! Go downstairs already woman," James teases, his tone light as he shoves her playfully on her way past him. 

Lily makes mimosas and the group of friends share easy laughs as the day passes by, gifts exchanged and Harry smothered with love and attention. She decides it's the easiest day, people are distracted enough in the festivities the Potters have planned to not spend the whole day worrying about her and Sirius.

Without eyes on them they both find it easier to talk, they share whispered jokes and his dizzying beauty seems softer when he's smiling at her as they peel veg together. 

"Lil I'm serious, go play with James and Harry. We can handle veg duty," She's determined in the way she gently pushes the girl through the archway into the kitchen. 

"Thankyou sweetie," Lily is beaming, looking between her friend and Sirius's back knowingly before shooting her friend a knowing wink. "Rem, come with!" She calls as she retreats to the living room. Remus does as told, but not before giving Sirius a pointed look, one that screams 'SAY SOMETHING'. 

"I've got the potatoes if you've got the carrots," Sirius offers

"Sounds good," She confirms, fluffy socks pattering on the floor as she takes her place beside him at the oak counter. 

"When are you flying back to New York?" 

"The 28th, I promised Mitch I'd be back in time for his birthday stroke crazy new years party," 

"That's fun," Sirius is lying. Nothing about what she just said is fun. It's the opposite. He has three more days before she's an ocean away all over again. She's rushing home, not staying for new years like she has every other year for some guy.

 That's the least fun of all, Mitch. Who the fuck is Mitch? Sirius is racking his memories, in all the awkward Christmases they'd shared since she left she's never once mentioned a Mitch. 

She sees the question in his eyes but doesn't say anything else. She's about to, truly she is, until the song playing through the small radio changes. 

"Oh my god it's my favourite Christmas song!" She's beaming, dropping the carrot and knife she's holding and rushing to turn the music up. 

He smiles gently, watching as she begins to dance around the kitchen. Red tartan pyjamas and the knit jumper Remus gifted her, he can't stop his mind from running to all the summer holidays they'd make breakfast together in the Potter's kitchen and she'd dance around. 

"God, you still can't dance," He teases, gentle smile 

"Shut up and dance with me!" She demands, she stretching an arm out to him and fuck he wishes he knew how to say no to her. 

They jump around and sing along, hands linked together as he twirls her around the room, hearts beaming and flooding the room with laughter. 

The song ends and she's breathless, chest to chest, so close to each other. 

"Mitch?" He can't help the question, not when he's so close to her, not when it's taking everything in him not to lean down and kiss her

"He's gay." 

"Oh,"

"There's no one else for me," She says it quietly, hands dropping his and looking down to her feet, almost embarrassed to admit it 

His hand shoots up, cupping her cheek gently and forcing her to look at him 

"Me either," He reassures, voice smooth and soft. 

So I'll go back to LA And the so-called friends who'll write books about me if I ever make it And wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles I'm faking And the heart I know I'm breaking is my own To leave the warmest bed I've ever known

James Potter can make a kick-ass espresso martini. It wasn't new information, he always made cocktails in the evening on Christmas. The rest of the inner friend group (the other girls from the dorm at school) and their spouses would come over, they would play stupid games and listen to the music they grew up on and the parents would take it in turns to check on Neville and Harry who by this point would be sound asleep in Harry's space themed bedroom. 

Lily had gawped with wide eyes when she'd chosen the seat next to Sirius at Christmas dinner. Remus almost choked on his carrot when Sirius had ever so casually wrapped his arm around her at the table and she had leaned into his touch   Marlene had been shooting her friend knowing looks all night, eyebrows raised in question at the way she'd been perched on the arm of his arm chair the whole night. 

Nothing had happened. Not really. But something in the air had changed, something in the way he was looking at her was different, the longing glances had lost their sadness. 

The night ends slowly, Marlene and Dorcas wander out into the night. Alice heads to where James had pulled out the sofa bed in the office. Lily leaves having checked on the kids one last time. 

She's the next to head to bed, acutely aware of the sound of Sirius behind her on the stairs even though he's been sleeping downstairs the whole trip. 

"What are you doing up here?" She whispers the question in the hallway as Sirius arrives on the landing. 

"I wanted to say night," He whispers back, he looks too pretty. The warm lighting from the downstairs light makes him almost glow and he has a drunken grin on his face. She's no better, her eyes glassy from one too many of those damned martinis. 

"You said night downstairs," She counters, he rolls his eyes fond gentle  smile as he tucks her hair behind her ear. 

"I'm glad you're here," 

"Me too," She confirms it quietly "Look forward to getting to see you, talk to you all year." He doesn't know if the light blush on her cheeks is from the alcohol or the whispered confession. 

"Doesn't have to just be at Christmas y'know? You could call, visit even. I really miss you," He isn't shy in his confession. He'd scream it from the rooftops if it meant she might be a part of his life again for more than just the holidays. 

"Sirius," Her voice is soft, he's too close. He is so close and she feels overwhelmed by him, drunk on his scent and using all her self control to keep her hands out of his hair. 

"I mean it, darling. Truly," His hand reaches out, firm against her chin. "Hey, look," He speaks, face close enough she feels his breath on her face. She follows his eyes, looking up to see a sprig of mistletoe above them. 

James does it every year, enchants mistletoe to sprout above two people in love. Mainly, he does it so he can kiss Lily and remind her to stop being so stressed about hosting and actually enjoy the holidays. Partly, he did it in the hopes it might help his two friends find their way back to each other. 

"Can I?" Sirius's question is full of nerves, scared he's pushing her too far

"Always,"

It's gentle and timid, the way he pushes his lips to hers. It's safe at first, a peck. Neither wants the other to freak and run. 

He's the one to push it further, though that isn't really surprise. 

He pulls her ever closer, chest to chest and his big arms wrap around her, holding her to him. He kisses her like he's desperate, scared if he stops he'll loose her all over again. 

She feels like she can breathe properly for the first time in years. Feels a weight off her shoulders as she allows her hands to tangle into his hair, a craving she'd had every time she looked at him. She lets him man handle her towards the door to the guest room. 

His tongue pushing into her mouth as he holds her against the wall by the door. One of her hands stays tangled in his hair as the other moves down to hold onto the warm skin of his hip, fingertips slipping under his maroon sweater. 

His hand travels down, landing on her bum with a firm squeeze and the motion seems to bring her back to her senses a little. She pulls away, though Sirius is quick to chase her kiss swollen lips with his own. She giggles in response, one last chaste peck to his lips before she looks him in the eyes, blown out a little with lust and creased from his bright grin.

"Sirius," She sighs out, he smirks head falling to allow himself to press a trails of kisses down her jaw and onto her neck

"Darling," he murmurs against her skin 

"This is a really bad idea," Her point seems a little futile as she moves her head to the side to allow him more space to press his kisses 

"Tell me you want me to stop. Say the word and I'll go back downstairs and you can go to sleep and we can wake up and pretend none of this happened," 

We could call it even Even though I'm leaving And I'll be yours for the weekend 'Tis the damn season

He doesn't think he's ever seen a sight so beautiful. She's laid next to him, body lit by the pale moonlight casting through the window. Her skin is bare and flushed and she fits against his body as perfectly as she always has. 

Her leg is strewn over his naked torso, her head resting on his chest, hand reaching up to comb her fingers through his hair. 

His arm that wraps around her lands on her back, thumb pressing comforting circles into her back.

"You're so perfect," He speaks into the quiet. She tilts her head up on his shoulder, allowing him to see her beaming face 

"Sirius, you are the most beautiful person I've ever known," Her tone is impossibly soft, as his heart in that moment. The sincerity in her voice makes his whole body feel warm. 

He feels too overwhelmed by the sickly sweet love in his chest to come up with much of a response, instead he presses his lips to her forehead an action so full over love and comfort it almost hurts her chest. 

"I'm gonna hate having to miss you again," She says softly, her settling back into his chest as he squeezes her closer

"Only ever a phone call away," He hums hand moving to toy with the ends of her hair

"You could visit?" She suggests, scared he'll laugh at the thought though she has no reason to be 

"Anything, if you want me to do it I will," His promise makes her grin widely, she leans up to press a gentle kiss to his lips. 

The quiet takes over once more, both basking in having the other in there arms again, a feeling they'd been craving in the years of absence. 

"I'm sorry I left," She whispers, she'd wanted to say it a thousand times, truly she had. 

"I'm sorry I didn't come after you," He pauses for a beat, he thinks maybe the question is too big, what he's asking of her too much. His eyebrows furrowing as he thinks, deep pout on his lips.

"What are you thinking about?" She questions, thumb gently  smoothing out the lines in his frown 

"Stay," He says it quietly, so quiet she almost misses it. "Please, I need you to stay,"

We could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now

She hadn't technically said no. She hadn't said anything really. 

She'd felt like an idiot, sitting up in the bed to better at Sirius. Blinking as her mind raced, what if she did stay? what would she be staying for? would he finally be ready to commit to her or was he asking her to give up the career she worked so hard for to be around when he wanted a casual fuck? 

"Say something," He hated how much his own voice sounded like it was begging, he hated the look in her eyes. The guilt. She was going to say no. He was certain of that as he looked at her. 

"Say anything," He doesn't mean to sound angry. Doesn't mean to make her feel bad. 

She's left, blinking as she desperately tries to gather her thoughts. He gets out of bed. 

His movements around the rooms are sharp and hurried, tugging his clothes back on. 

"Sirius," She says, she needs him to look at her. Needs him to stop for a second, to talk to her. 

"No," His hands tug his jumper over his head as he moves towards the door 

"Stop. Sirius, please just wait," She clambering out of the bed to follow him, grabbing her pyjama pants and pulling them up quickly as she reaches for the large knit sweater. She's following him down the stairs of the silent house. 

He slams the front door in her face before she has the chance to follow him out into the snow. She hears the revving of his motorbike before the engine kicks in, hears the way it fades away as he races into the night. 

She feels like an idiot. Feels pathetic as she sinks to the ground, back pressed to the front door. She had vowed a long time ago to stop crying over Sirius Black yet she can't stop herself. 

"What's going on?" Remus is calling. Woken up by the sound of the slamming door. She wipes at her tears, desperate to hide them from him but the second he sees her and sends her a soft smile she's blubbering all over again. 

"He left. He fucking just left," She's hiccuping through her crying, and he joins her on the old wooden floor. 

"What happened?" He asks gently, a comforting hand squeezes at her knee. 

"We slept together," 

"Ok, ok and then he just left?" 

"No. He asked me to stay and I- I froze Rem. I sat there like an idiot and didn't say anything. He just- I needed to think and he wouldn't give me fucking second," 

"What would you have said?" 

"I don't know what he wants. If he wanted to try like really try I would have said yes," 

"He needs to know that," 

Time flies Messy as the mud on your truck tires Now I'm missing your smile, hear me out We could just ride around And the road not taken looks real good now

She hadn't been to his apartment before. Remus had apparated her there and waited with her in a comfortable silence until he'd arrived. Sat on the curb outside, her head on his shoulder. Knowing he was home Remus left, she was safe on the busy London street, Sirius wouldn't let any harm come to her despite the deep sigh he lets out at the sight of her. 

"I wanna be alone,"

"Too bad. I need to talk to you," She demands, arms crossed in front of her. 

"We can talk later," 

"No Sirius. You don't get to say all that shit to me and then just leave," 

"Fine. come on,"

He leads her in an awkward silence up into the building, refusing to look at her in the short elevator ride to the 8th floor. 

His apartment is very him, it's cosy and homely and smells like the Gryffindor common room. 

He drops onto the sofa in the living room, she's too busy eyeing the framed photos on the wall, heart melting a little at the photo of the two of them, both in school uniform sat by the black lake her head on his shoulder his arms holding her close to him. Matching bright grins staring back at her.

"You wanted to talk," He reminds, embarrassed that even after rejecting him she's seeing his framed photo of her. 

" The other day, at the party You asked me if I regret leaving? I lied. No I didn't lie. I just- I didn't tell you the truth. I regret it, every fucking day I regret it, I lay awake every night thinking about what we could have been if I'd stuck around,"

"It's a little late for that," he grumbles, arms folded and a stoic look on his face

"Could you just listen to me?" She snaps, "I've been in love with you since I was 14 Sirius and you have never ever wanted a relationship," 

"That's not true," He protests

"Oh. So you just didn't want one with me?" She feels like an idiot, standing in front of him. Their friends were wrong, she was wrong.

He hates the hurt in her voice, the tears in her eyes.

He's on his feet now, passing over the burgundy rug to grab her hand in his

"That's not what I mean. I just- I was scared, scared if you were mine and something happened. I couldn't have lived through that," 

"You never told me that, you always just said you weren't a boyfriend guy," 

"I could be. For you I could be,"

"Why did you leave?" She questions, desperate to know why he couldn't have given her just a few minutes to work things out

"I couldn't hear you tell me that you don't love me enough to stay,"

"I would never say that,"

"No?" He questions timidly, his eyes searching her desperately

"No," She shakes her head "If I stay this can't be what it was. I'm giving up my life here. We are older now and we are safe and this has to be real,"

"It's always been real to me. I'm in love with you, been in loved with you since second year and I will be until the day I die. So sweetheart, please, please be mine? for real this time,"

"It'll always be you Sirius," She promises, his lips kiss her and she feels herself fall in love with him all over again. 

And it always leads to you and my hometown It always leads to you and my hometown

[badmoonriiising]

After they parted ways, Regulus decided not to look back for James despite of how much he wanted to. He was already too late. James had a wife and a little boy. It made sense: everyone knew from the beginning how fitting Lily was for him, James would be an incredible dad, and Regulus, aware of how kids deseve to be loved and have such good parents because of his own experiencies, decided to let Harry Potter have a father devoted to his family.

Life carried on.

Years later, Regulus doesn't regret his decision. He does, however, think that his old heartbreak has nothing to do with how losing Pandora due to her experiments has shattered his heart to pieces. She was his best friend. Regulus could keep up with everything just because she was always keeping his hand with such gentleness. Evan, Barty and Dorcas are a mess about it too. Xenophilius seems to get madder day by day. And little Luna, who witnesed everthing, is devastaded. She has Pandora's curios gaze, always looking for Regulus now that she seeks comfort, holding him almost afrid of losing her godfather too.

It happens rather quickly. Xenophilius doesn't get better, never ready to take care of his daughter again, and Regulus keeps his thoughts about how kids deserve to be taken care of with pure joy and love after years. Luna was Pandora's, Regulus was hers too, so it makes sense they now belong to each other.

Regulus Black isn't build to be a father. But how he tries. Luna ends up having his meaning grin, mixes her interest for magical creatures with her godfather's anthics for books, and always stands for herself, never letting anyone laugh at her.

He's never loved someone this much in his entire life.

She's the one to achieve what Sirius and James never could, getting him out of Grimmauld Place, making him forget everything about the Black family, because Luna must never be near to anything slightly related to them.

But things are never easy, aren't they? Of course Luna has to go to Hogwarts and get back being friends with Harry Potter.

After years and years of hidding his pain, Regulus faces his brother, with complicated feelings among them: obviously Sirius thought he would never do better and won't admit he's more than impressed about how Regulus has raised this little girl.

And of course, there's James Potter. He's not longer with Lily, but they work side by side because they still care deeply for each other and have a boy they would die for in common. It's different now. James has a family, but so does Regulus. He likes his peace and doesn't want any Potter nearer than necessary. It's easier to pretend he doesn't see the pain burning in James' eyes when he discovers the reason why Regulus never reached out, of how he decided to let him have his happy life and pretended he preferred Walburga Black in the end. And let's not misunderstand it: despite it all, James is fucking happy. But he always wanted to share his happiness with Regulus, and Luna reminds him so much of him back when they were at school that it breaks his heart every single time.