#one day i will have a consistent tag system. one day
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neonacidtrip · 2 years ago
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i hope you've been well
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Thank you! I hope you have been well, too!
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skitskatdacat63 · 2 years ago
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Yayyyyyyyy finally working on my pinned post :D having fun :D
Its funny to me cause I'll do these super organizational things for fandom purposes and genuinely have fun with it, but then would rather die than be even remotely organizational for school
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neverendingford · 3 months ago
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#tag talk#I've been getting back into working out and it's pretty great#home workout not gym workout cause no fucking way I do not belong at the gym#bicep curls are my favorite and squats are my least favorite but I want big thighs so I must continue#I don't split my exercising into different groups on different days. I just have a general set of exercises that I do#I prefer to work my whole body instead of having leg day arm day back day and what have you#it's way more satisfying to lie exhausted and unmoving on the floor as your whole body aches versus only isolated ache and exhaustion#I want to start running again as well but I haven't found a good way to incorporate that into my routine yet.#I'm gonna go on a sunrise hike later this week with a friend. I'm pretty hyped for it I've been wanting to for a while.#brain is overloaded trying to calculate scenarios with the new poly relationship I'm sort of in now#I say sort of because it's so new it's not really established yet. but we have a discord group chat and movie plans for tomorrow#I think our identity is shifting back to R now. I put on a skirt to wear around the house and it feels right and not weird anymore#so I think nature is healing and we're back to normal identity balance which I'm conflicted about#cause on one hand I'm way more cheerful but he's way more solid and reliable and grounded but I'm more social and lively#idk. like most things in life it's not about picking one or the other but rather balancing two opposing sides of a spectrum#my answer is not to pick one identity or the other but rather to learn how to integrate them both into a functional working system#but that's easier said than done.#idk. being two people who slide in and out of phase is kind of annoying actually. I lack consistency#consistency in relationships. consistency in appetite. consistency in physical activity. consistency in entertainment preferences#it makes it so hard to find a routine and stick with it because I oscillate between two people with separate preferences for routine#I worry I'll lose his routine now that I'm slipping back into R not L. I've started exercising again. my bottom dysphoria is manageable.#and I'm worried I'll lose that if I finish turning into R again. worried I'll lose this routine I've finally established.#I'm worried I'll lose who I am again and again and again and never be able to rely on my internal infrastructure#this sucks#I didn't ask for this
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washedoutwings · 5 months ago
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yeah so uhhhh we’re always permanently low on motivation so umm yeah sorry but we are doing one of those note things
20 notes: we will try to take our meds more consistently
50 notes: draw at least something once a week
70 notes: eat something for breakfast every day (at least an apple or protein drink)
100 notes: start keeping better track of our delusions/hallucinations
150 notes: tell our therapist about 2 of our headmates
200 notes: start a system journal
300 notes: tell our therapist about 5 of our headmates
500 notes: tell our therapist about all of our headmates
700 notes: tell our doctor about about our chronic pain
1000 notes: eat something medium for breakfast at least three days a week (like a bowl of cereal)
1500 notes: ask our closer friends to use she/her less (they know that we’re trans)
from here on it’s more about just good habits that we don’t have much motivation for instead of self care type stuff, so less important
2000: draw every day (when possible)
2500: finish writing one of our wip stories/fics
3500: start working on an art commissions portfolio
4500: start working on a writing commissions portfolio
6000: set up art commissions
8000: set up writing commissions
sorry, we feel really guilty about this but we really need some motivation for this stuff. honestly we don’t expect this to even get to 20, but that’s fine! no deadline, ummm if you really want to spam idc, feel free to tag people. i’m not gonna tag anyone, i don’t want anyone to feel pressured
edit: WHAT THE FUCK where did yall come from???????
edit 2: damn i was offline for like 2 days and it was barely at 300 and we log back on to 500+ uhhhh thanks ig lol
edit 3: well we’re almost at 700 so..i guess i’m gonna add a couple more?
edit 4: the gimmicks got to us…also added some more
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cursed-peanut · 6 months ago
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A/N: Hello everyoneeee!!! As promised, here is part 2 of Reunited!! I will be making more parts however it won’t be like a fic, more like a combination of scenarios, headcanons, etc. If you have any questions or thoughts on this AU, my ask box is always open and so are my comments. My taglist is also open! If you’d like to be added, lmk! Please make sure I can tag your account first though. May sound silly but I couldn’t tag some people because they had tagging disabled. If you were one of the people who asked to be tagged but wasn’t, please change that in Tumblr settings :) Anyway, this kinda gave yandereish vibes at the end??? If you want me to turn it into that or write a spin off where Sukuna is a Yandere for reader, lmk in the comments 💗 Anywho, happy reading and I hope you all enjoy this as much as you all did in part 1 <333
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“You are to be monitored by me at all times! If you get caught walking around by yourself well…I will either get an earful from the old hags at the top or they’ll have both of our heads, no in between!” Gojo Satoru tells you in a tone way too cheerful for what he was telling you.
“What? Why? I don’t even have any cursed energy, I’m just a regular human, I’m not some powerful sorcerer.”
“That is exactly why. We’re keeping your presence under the radar for now, but as soon as it inevitably slips out that you’re back and so is Sukuna, so will immediately become a target.”
“That’s not true. ‘Kuna may not be back to his full power, however he is still strong. No curses and sorcerer’s alike would dare hurt someone so close to the King of Curses.”
“While you may be right that he’s powerful even though Sukuna isn’t at his full potential, your ‘Kuna’ currently has the power of one of his fingers and is stuck in a fifteen year old boys body. He could easily be evaded by fellow special grade curses and curse users. Please realise this is for your safety.”
This doesn’t make sense to you. Yes, he’s not at his full power, but it’s not like you’ll be leaving Jujutsu Tech anyway. After all, you don’t go on missions, you’re not a Jujutsu Sorcerer and you will never have a chance to — not that you want to anyway. So logistically there is no need for your protection. Are they worried sorcerers might attack you? That’s surely a fault in the system of their schooling and society if they’re scared of that. Or maybe…they don’t trust you?
“They want me dead because of my relation to ‘Kuna, don’t they?” Gojo’s deafening silence answers your question. “Why?”
“Because they’re afraid that there’s a possibility you’re hiding a powerful technique from us. I personally don’t believe you are deceiving us, but even if you were, I’d be able to stop you anyway. So don’t be become all cocky with delusion. Thinking you can defeat me.” He grins.
“Mhm, well…thank you then.”
“Hm?”
“Thank you for believing in me,” You shakily sigh. “I’m happy to know someone is willing to stand up for me.”
“Of course! I would get a mopey Yuji if you died, and who knows how Sukuna would react, but I know for a fact it would not end well. Talking of Yuji and Sukuna, we should go check on them now!”
That’s right. Itadori has recently been announced as dead, however it seems Itadori must have made some sort of pact with Sukuna to revive him. You and Gojo, along with a few others at Jujutsu Tech, are the only people who know he’s alive. Gojo seems to take this opportunity to train Itadori well, and what that truly means is most of the time he conducts experiments that mainly consist of Gojo purposely annoying Sukuna to see how Itadori’s body would react. Most experiments involved you in some way — he found Sukuna’s threats very amusing, but what he found even more amusing is your ability to make the King of Curses sulk for a day by simply lightly reprimanding him for these threats.
“‘Kuna! That is no way to talk to someone. He just wanted a hug.”
“Yeah ‘Kunaaaa. I just wanted a hug.”
“Gojo-Sensei, please. Stop angering him. It’s getting harder and harder to suppress him.”
“This is exactly why I’m doing this! To help you learn how to suppress Sukuna, no matter the circumstances.” Gojo explains. While that may be partly true, Itadori knows that’s a lie. He’s doing this because it’s funny to him.
“You better watch it, Sorcerer scum,” Sukuna grits. “May I remind you that when I make this idiots body my own, I’m killing you first.”
“‘Kuna!” You scowl, hugging Gojo tighter to Sukuna’s dismay. Gojo flashes a shit-eating-grin Sukuna’s way for one last time and lets go of you.
“Thank you, Sensei. I wasn’t sure how much longer I could suppress him for.” Itadori sighs. You sit down next to him and give him a warm hug, rubbing circles on his back. Itadori looks up at you with warm eyes as you press a kiss to his forehead. You always bring the mummy issues out of him.
Meanwhile, in Sukuna’s domain, Sukuna is looking at you through Itadori’s eyes and he can’t help but marvel at you. You’re even more beautiful than he remembers, and you’re so unbelievably near. He wishes he could take his vessel’s place, return to his former glory with you by his side, but that will have to wait.
He will return to his former glory and you will be at his side when that happens. But above all else, what makes his wait all the more worth it, is the world he plans to create will be perfect for you and him. You wouldn’t need to worry about any disgusting sorcerers killing him and sealing you again.
Even if you hate him for killing the sorcerers, he can live with that. As long as you still love him, and stay by his side, he can deal with that.
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Taglist: @makuzume @spicyhyunn @pearlescentwonderland @namjooningera @six-eyed-samurai @natriae @domainofmarie @lixern @fluttershyfangs @girlyuuta @anabort @yu-87 @sukunaglazer4ever @madison777x @dervngedgf @calisnewworld @ilybbg @the-banshee @mostnormalsukunastan2024real @williamafton26 @mythoswarrior-23 @megantheefan @mindless-rock @kimsunoo2003 @anayesha1 @lelelenlenn @shyshybabyy @unlikelystay @shigemis0ra @iloveboysinred @eresel4mordemivid4 @meo66 @frozen-waffles @mrsslytherin00 @lazyperfectioniste @whosmarjj @itawifeyy @sugurubabe @hanniebanggi
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ginnsbaker · 28 days ago
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All Of Your Pieces (3 - The Neighbor)
Chapter Summary: Agnes sees the perfect opportunity to stir up some trouble while Wanda deals with her jealousy toward your work assistant, Geraldine. Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Female Reader Chapter word count: 2.8k+ | Chapter Tags/Warnings: None
A/N: I really have nothing to say except that I enjoyed writing Agatha in this chapter // More author's notes here.
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
The team has been at a standstill, figuring out who’s behind this, or how to communicate with anyone trapped inside the town. Every drone they've sent in morphs into something entirely different, thwarting their efforts to gather any useful intel. The people sent underground to scout a safe route through have gone dark, their communication cut off. No one else volunteered to attempt approaching the perimeter after that.
The broadcasts they've been tracking are erratic, cutting out for hours with no warning, making it hard to keep a consistent eye on the town's odd behaviors. But it's during one of these quiet periods when something clicks in Darcy's mind.
“I think I have something,” Darcy blurts out to Jimmy. They’ve been scraping the bottom of the barrel, running out of faces to identify from the snippets of life in Westview they caught on screen. 
“Yeah?” Jimmy gives her a tired look, only half-listening. He can't remember the last time he managed more than an hour of uninterrupted sleep. Even if he could find the time to rest, the bizarre situation they're in won't let his mind relax. 
Darcy sighs and leads him outside the tent.
“So, you’ve seen that radio on Wanda’s kitchen counter, right?”
Jimmy only nods.
Darcy continues, “The next time she’s washing dishes, or whatever—which by my count—happens about once an episode, barf, we’ll shoot a signal to that little guy.” She leads him to a set of computers set up behind a pickup truck. Jimmy doesn’t understand what’s going on with these systems, but he’s hoping Darcy really is onto something.
“This transmitter will mimic the frequency of the broadcast,” she pauses to catch her breath in the cold and to give him time to catch up with her science. “And if my theory is right, it will allow us to speak to her.”
She cuts off any chance for Jimmy to comment and assures him, “This is definitely going to work.”
The annual Westview Harvest Festival is in full swing. The town square is packed with booths overflowing with baked goods and fresh fall produce. A small stage is set up for the local band playing tunes from the 70s, while kids dart around in all directions, their faces painted with fanciful designs. Billy and Tommy are with their preschool teachers, who are keeping them and other children their age occupied with arts and crafts that involve tumbleweeds—a material no one seems to think is entirely safe for five-year-olds to play with.
In hindsight, it’s the ideal setting for introductions and mingling. However, everyone here already knows each other—everyone, that is, except for Wanda. She makes an effort to blend in, but apart from a few interactions with the planning committee, which weren’t particularly fruitful, she often remains secluded at home. This makes you, the only one in the household who heads out daily for work, the more socially connected of the two. It’s both amusing and slightly anxiety-inducing to watch you interact with the townsfolk who are essentially strangers to you and to Wanda, if only you knew. You and Wanda never had the opportunity to live a normal life, to settle in a typical city, surrounded by neighbors who could have become integral to the life you might have built together. 
Seeing you interact with these people, she’s realizing it’s harder than she thought to share you with others. Or maybe she’s just as selfish as she’s always been, never really outgrowing it. When you were both part of the Avengers, it was like living in a bubble, surrounded by only a few familiar faces every day. Now, outside that controlled environment, it’s challenging her expectations and stirring up feelings she thought she had under control.
It becomes particularly tough when she sees Geraldine heading towards you, sporting that perpetual, dazzling smile full of perfect white teeth. Wanda's fingers curl into a fist, tiny wisps of red energy leaking from them. You quickly cover her hand with yours, and the effect is immediate—she relaxes slightly, letting you intertwine your fingers with hers, anchoring herself by your side where she feels secure.
“It's so nice to see you outside of the office, just being one of us for a change,” Geraldine says, though she seems to be wearing the same uniform as at work. Not that you're judging, but it does make you wonder why she hasn't changed.
“Definitely beats being stuck behind a desk,” you reply, your attention briefly wandering. Only then do you notice that Wanda has subtly withdrawn her hand from yours, now exploring a booth with homemade apple cider. You hadn't even noticed the exact moment she let go.
“Hello, Wanda!” Geraldine greets her warmly. 
Wanda musters a tight-lipped smile that’s convincing enough, as Geraldine appears quite taken with it. Just then, Geraldine spots Agnes standing a little away from the crowd, lingering behind Wanda with a look that borders on suspicion or disdain. 
Geraldine steps up to her while Wanda continues to busy herself with whatever else is being showcased in the booth. “Hi, I'm Geraldine. Isn’t this a wonderful evening?” She extends her hand to Agnes.
Agnes eyes the offered hand but doesn’t accept it. Instead, she sizes up Geraldine with a quick once-over and nods, foregoing any introductions. Geraldine's smile falters briefly, but she quickly shakes off the slight, tossing a brisk, “See you around, Y/N!” over her shoulder as she heads back to her table.
You wave back and let out a sigh, relieved that you’ve just sidestepped what could have been the most awkward moment of your life. Wanda’s jealousy towards Geraldine seems more serious than you’d realized. You know Wanda can be possessive; it's just been a long time since it's manifested this way. But then, it's also been a while since you've both been in a crowd of strangers like this. Since…
Since when, exactly?
“Y/N, honey?” Wanda’s voice snaps you out of your fog.
You blink. “Hm?”
“I’m thirsty.”
Just like that, you’ve forgotten about your lapse of memory, replaced by a desire to tend to your wife's needs.
“I’ll get us some refreshments. What would you like?” you ask.
“Just some water, please.”
“Water here, too,” Agnes calls out, unsolicited. 
You suppress the urge to roll your eyes. It's great that Wanda's making friends in the neighborhood, but did it really have to be Agnes O’Connor? Ever since you and Wanda moved into this quiet suburb, Agnes has made it her personal mission to be involved in every aspect of your lives. You can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to it than the apparent nosiness of your neighbor.
As you head over to get the drinks, Agnes sidles up to Wanda, her eyes gleaming with an opportunity to stir some pot. 
“Geraldine seems quite taken with your wife.”
It’s not like Wanda doesn’t know what Agnes’s doing, but she finds herself nodding in agreement anyway. Your new assistant does appear smitten with you, and while Wanda gets the appeal—you are, undeniably, crush-worthy—she can't say she's thrilled about it.
“Y/N is her boss,” Wanda murmurs, more to herself than to Agnes.
“Oh, honey,” Agnes laughs condescendingly. “Do you even go to the movies? That's how the steamiest affairs start, you know.”
Wanda bristles at the sound of that endearment from someone other than you. But she keeps herself together—barely. 
“I trust her,” Wanda forces out.
As you're getting drinks, Geraldine joins you, picking up a soda herself. She lets out a light laugh at a joke from the bartender, and you find yourself chuckling too, oblivious to the piercing look your wife is drilling into your back.
Meanwhile, Agnes sees her opening and swoops in, linking her arm through Wanda's with a bit more force than necessary. 
“Of course, you trust her, dear,” she murmurs right by Wanda's ear. “But do you trust her?” She points subtly with her chin towards Geraldine, her lips pursed. “You know what they say, keep your friends close, and your enemies closer…”
Wanda's shoulders tense, her entire frame stiffening. As you return with the drinks, Agnes steps away, leaving Wanda visibly shaken, like she’s teetering on the edge of a panic attack.
“Everything okay?” you ask, handing her a drink. You've noticed before how Wanda's demeanor changes around Agnes; she’s clearly a source of stress for her. It’s going to be a difficult conversation, but it might be time to tell Wanda what you really think about the neighbor.
Wanda takes the water you offer, her fingers trembling slightly as she does. For a moment, she appears distant, disengaged, as if her mind is elsewhere. Then, with a sudden shift, she flashes you one of those smiles that sends a shiver down your spine.
“I'm fine,” she declares, a little too brightly. Then, seemingly out of the blue, she asks, “Is Geraldine here with someone?”
You stop short, realizing you really don't know much about Geraldine beyond work. “I didn’t see her with anyone,” you say.
Wanda nods thoughtfully. Her next suggestion catches you by surprise. 
“Maybe you should invite her over to our table.”
Did you hear that correctly? Had Wanda just done a complete 180 regarding your assistant and was now interested in getting to know her? You shoot a suspicious glance at Agnes. Had she said something to Wanda to change her mind?
“Are you sure?” you ask, puzzled by her abrupt change of heart.
“I am,” Wanda affirms. “It might be nice to make a new friend.”
Back at the response camp, Darcy and Jimmy are huddled around the small, grainy television, waiting for the moment Wanda’s in her kitchen so they can send a message through her radio device. However, the usual domestic scenes are conspicuously absent, replaced by static and sporadic cuts to the ongoing Harvest Festival.
“Come on, come on,” Darcy mutters under her breath, shoving her glasses back up her nose. They've been slipping a lot lately, probably because she's been hunching over her work more than usual these past few days.
“It's this festival,” Jimmy says, squinting at the screen. “I think the whole town's out there tonight. I don’t think we’re going to get the chance.”
Their attempts to contact anyone inside the Hex are dwindling, and Hayward's interest leans more towards studying the energy barrier encasing the town rather than resolving the anomaly itself. His latest directive to launch another drone into the barrier feels like a brute force attempt to crack the problem. Jimmy thinks it’s a waste of time—and resources.
“Yeah, and you know what’s worse?” Darcy grumbles. “I have a bad feeling about Agnes. Every time she's around, things just seem to... escalate.”
As they watch, the screen cuts to a shot of Agnes at the festival, linking arms with Wanda, whispering something that makes Wanda’s expression tighten. “See, what did I tell you?” Darcy exclaims, pointing at the screen. “Who’s this Agnes again in real life?” she asks.
Jimmy swivels in his chair, his gaze sweeping across the expansive pinboard filled with photos of Westview residents. Agnes’s face is not among them. 
“No idea,” he says flatly. He had already run a search in the database, but it came back empty.
“So, we've identified Y/N, Monica, and Agnes as outsiders in Westview,” Darcy explains, tallying them off on her fingers. 
“That’s correct,” Jimmy confirms.
“And then there’s Wanda’s sons. But again… we haven’t seen any other children in the show besides the twins.”
Jimmy thinks about it for a while. It had never really occurred to him before. “Maybe they’re bound to show up at some point?”
“Smells fishy to me,” Darcy huffs. Her thoughts circle back to Agnes. “How do you think Agnes ended up here?” she asks, their list of unanswered questions growing daily.
Jimmy shrugs. “She could’ve just been visiting.”
Darcy considers it. It's a possibility, but somehow, it doesn't feel quite right—too simple, too convenient for someone as vibrant and prickly as the character Agnes portrays.
It's as if Wanda's animosity toward Geraldine just magically went away. 
They’ve been chatting for almost an hour. Initially, Wanda made sure to include you in the conversation, but as time passed, she and Geraldine started connecting over topics that didn’t involve you as much. Feeling somewhat left out but also at ease that the problem between your wife and your secretary has apparently resolved itself, you decide to check out the festival booths.
This is where Agnes finds the perfect opportunity to get you alone. She starts her approach—to your surprise and discomfort—by acknowledging the elephant in the room.
“I know you don’t like me very much,” she says with a knowing smile. “Maybe we can change that tonight?”
You eye her with suspicion, easily seeing through her blatant attempts to flirt her way into your good graces.
“How exactly are we going to do that?” you ask, crossing your arms in front of you.
Agnes simply laughs off the cool reception you’ve given her. If anything, she revels in it. 
“By getting to know each other, obviously,” she says.
“Right.”
She takes your elbow, and you swear she can feel you recoil at her closeness, yet she doesn’t seem to care. She urges you forward, dictating the pace. Her grip is unexpectedly firm, as if to say you have no choice but to listen—like leaving isn't an option.
With you literally in her grasp, Agnes sets her plans into motion. “So, how did you and Wanda meet?” she asks.
You deliver the narrative precisely as it plays out in your memory, exactly as Wanda implanted it in your mind. “We grew up next to each other. Best friends since we were kids.” 
“How cute,” she says, in that smooth, supercilious tone that usually makes your skin crawl. But this time, with the memories of Wanda filling your head, you hardly notice.
“Yeah, I remember when I first saw her,” you continue, gazing into the distance as if the scene you speak of is right there before your eyes. “It was almost Halloween, and my mom had baked a pumpkin pie to welcome them to the neighborhood. She sent me to deliver it. Wanda answered the door.”
“Love at first sight?”
“More like the opposite,” you say, throwing Agnes a good-natured smile, something you’ve never done before. “She couldn’t stand me, and I felt the same way.”
“Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?” Agnes drawls before accompanying it with a short chuckle. “Who knows? Maybe there’s hope for us yet. You might end up not hating me so much after all.”
“Maybe…” you say, the smile reaching your eyes this time.
“Good, good,” Agnes says. “I can’t think of anything more romantic than growing up with the person you’ll be with for the rest of your life. Almost like it’s… sketched out, no?”
You nod at her, not sure where she’s going with this, but you appreciate the sentiment. You consider yourself lucky to have known Wanda most of your life. 
“So, you've lived in Westview your whole life?” Agnes asks.
“Yes,” you nod without hesitation.
“And you've only ever been to Westview?”
“No, of course not,” you laugh, ready to list off places you've been, but suddenly, you can't name any. The cities and trips that should come easily to your tongue just... don't materialize.
Not a single one.
Agnes watches you struggle with a blank expression. A second later, she begins throwing out suggestions, as if trying to help. 
“Canada?" 
You shake your head. 
“California?” 
Another shake.
“New York?”
No. This time, your eyes sting with the frustration of trying to pull something from the haze, realizing there’s nothing there. 
Have you really never been anywhere but Westview?
“Eastview, maybe?” she offers with a bit of sarcasm as she names the town next door.
“I—”
“How strange,” Agnes muses, driving home the final nail in the coffin of your crumbling peace.
You jerk your arm away from her grip and take a few instinctive steps back. “I need to pick up the twins,” you blurt out, seizing the first excuse that comes to mind. “We should be heading out soon.”
Without waiting for her reply, you start walking away, driven by a sudden, intense need to be with your boys, with Wanda. To hold them close, to find some stability. Because right now, you’re petrified by a fear you cannot name. 
“I heard Australia’s amazing this time of year!” Agnes calls after you.
The idea of not having been anywhere but Westview—it’s possible, right? Some people spend their entire lives in one place. But if this feeling—the one that's been gnawing at you lately—is real, if the world outside of Westview is truly non-existent, then what does that say about your life here?
What does it say about you?
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sailoryooons · 23 days ago
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Obsidian | Preface | Red (myg)
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☾ Summary: You've never been able to forget a face. Neither has Min Yoongi. And you both remember the face of the man who ruined your lives.
☾ Word Count: 1,046
☾ Genre: Urban fantasy, criminal/syndicate, strangers to lovers, angst, eventual smut
☾ Rating: Dead Dove. Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately. 
☾ Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence and death, graphic depictions of blood and dismemberment, depiction of stab wounds and being stabbed, feeling of death/on the cusp of death, reference to Yoongi negatively being referred to as a momma's boy, one (1) poisoned and dead fish, death of parents.
☾ A/N: Hi, I am so nervous to be writing this series again and re-doing what I feel like I got wrong the first time. I hope you like the new and what I think is improved version. This preface is much of the same as it's original predecessor, but with a little more consistency in the voice I will use for the rest of the story telling and a little heavier on the experience Yoongi is having. Additionally, the magic system in his has been tweaked from the original, but you will see that in later chapters and as always, I will include the Jewel Caste at the bottom of each chapter.
☾ A/N 2: If you were on the tag list for the original fic and you would like to be removed, please don't hesitate to let me know. I will be going off the same tag list request form I have used the past year, which might include users no longer interested in this story. Please don't worry about messaging me if you want to be removed or alternatively select the removal option on the tag list request form linked below the disclaimer.
☾ Disclaimer: All members of BTS are faces and name claims for this story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment or representation of real-life people. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios.
Main Masterlist ☾ Ask ☾ Tag List Requests ☾ Series Masterlist ☾ Next Chapter
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Min Yoongi dies the same day as his favorite koi fish. 
When he opens the door to his home, the world is awash in red. Red on the tile, red on the carpet. Red on half of his mother’s face - the other half can’t be red because it’s missing. Her jewels are missing too, none of the normal sapphires that glitter on her fingers and ears in their rightful place. 
Red weeps from the ceiling, red spills under the table. Red soaks through Yoongi’s  socks as he stands in the kitchen. He’d left his shoes by the doorway like his mother always asked him, and now they’re red red red. 
At the center of all of that red is his father, head missing. No - maybe not missing. Yoongi’s eyes keep scanning the tableau of crimson until he sees the head of Min Yujun a little ways from his body. Not missing, but not in the right place.  Lights out. No one home. 
Yoongi’s eyes go to his father's hand - he has to look on the other side of the room from his father’s head to do it - looking for the jewels that should be on his fingers. Yujun always has his onyx rings on, perfect gems set into gold bands. Onyx rings, onyx necklaces, onyx bracelets. 
There’s no onyx here. Just more red, dripping from the blunt edge of fingertips recently cut too short. Yoongi diverts his eyes. Seeing the ringless hands of his father is worse than looking at the severed head, the perversity of it turning his stomach. 
Yoongi never hears the man behind him. Doesn’t see it coming until he’s slammed from behind, a wall of radiant energy knocking him forward toward his father’s body - not the head. Yoongi screams as he hits the floor - can’t help it. He rears back, pushing away from the jeweless body, but his hands slip in all that red.
His stomach roils but there’s little time to think as he rolls to the side. He summons the power in the onyx rings on his fingers, feels the vibration as they recognize his call, ready to fight back.
He stops entirely when he sees the face hovering above him, immediately dropping the summoning of his radiant energy. He’s so shocked to see Kim Juwon leaning over him that at first, he doesn’t feel the knife carving out his stomach. 
Yoongi opens his mouth to ask for help finding his dad’s rings, but he’s interrupted by the soft way Juwon says, “I’m sorry.”
Yoongi thinks Juwon means about his parents, maybe. But then white hot pain blooms in his stomach and Yoongi screams, looking down to see the knife pulling down, opening him up. Red red red red. More red. So much red that Yoongi didn’t know he had that much red inside of him. 
Juwon pulls the onyx rings from Yoongi’s fingers. Yoongi tries to pull his hands away from the elder, crying as he tries to keep the red inside. It’s spilling out of him faster than he can keep up with, his panic mounting as Juwon pulls the onyx stones from Yoongi’s ears. Juwon does it gently, as though he’s afraid to hurt Yoongi. Like he doesn’t want to spill more red. 
Yoongi thinks he cries out for his mom. At least he forms the words, and tries to beg for her help. His dad doesn’t have a head to yell at him to stop being a momma's boy, so Yoongi screams for her. Wants her to wake up and crawl over to him and hold him together. To stop the red. 
He’s never been afraid of dying until right now. 
He doesn’t remember Juwon leaving him there, bleeding out and toeing the veil, ready to join his parents on the other side. Yoongi thinks he sees them, thinks he hears them calling to him. But there’s a stronger call, a vibration that pulls at him. That begins to itch. A frequency he can’t let go of. 
Yoongi feels it more than he sees it and he starts slipping across the floor to where a single ring has rolled under the fridge. Juwon wouldn’t have noticed - couldn’t have noticed. Juwon radiates at onyx, never obsidian. 
No one but Min Yujun radiates at obsidian. Or used to. 
But now the obsidian calls to Yoongi and he slides toward it, hand pressed to his stomach, trying to stop the red. His hands are wet and sticky and he gags, feeling something slippery when he presses too hard on the wound. 
The obsidian ring pulses, an invisible force under the fridge. Yoongi slides his hand under, gritting his teeth at the tight fit as he reach reach reaches. Just a little to the left. Almost. Almost. His fingers make contact with the ring and energy explodes through him. 
Yoongi lets out a guttural sound, somewhere between a yell and a gurgle as he lies on the floor, thinking it might be too late. But as the power surges through him, vibrating at a higher frequency than Yoongi has ever known, he realizes his father has left him a single parting gift. 
There on the kitchen floor, Yoongi radiates at obsidian for the first time. Feels his body stitch itself back together, itchy and hot and bothersome. When he’s done, he lays on the floor, sobbing up at the ceiling and trembling, sick and corroded by the powerful gem. 
Hours or minutes pass, he isn’t sure. But when he gets up and sees his home painted red, he decides that Min Yoongi must die here too. 
Sliding the ring on his finger, he stands. He is dripping in more red than he’s ever known, but there is black on his finger, the darkest jewel on the caste and the most dangerous power to wield.
Stepping out of the red-filled home and into the night, he takes a deep breath. Sees his favorite fish turned over in the koi pond, bloated with poison. That fish had been given to him by his mother as a birthday gift, a symbol of perseverance and strength. 
So he takes the name of his favorite fish and walks into the world born anew, leaving the ghost of Min Yoongi behind as Agust takes his place. 
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THE JEWEL CASTE
*IN ORDER FROM TOP TO BOTTOM THEN LEFT TO RIGHT OF POWER.
Lights
Opal → Selenite → Diamond  Rose Quartz → Morganite → Kunzite
Mids
Jade → Peridot → Flourite  Jasper → Spinel → Ruby
Darks
Turquoise → Azurite → Sapphire Tourmaline → Jet → Onyx
Corrosives
Emerald → Garnet  → Midnight → Obsidian
Tumblr media
TAG LIST:
@astroodledream @myynameisbuckyy @idkjustlovingbts @hobibbb
@codeinebelle @rinkud
187 notes · View notes
caesium-55 · 9 months ago
Text
—seven days. [ vii ]
pairing: max verstappen x manager! reader.
summary: as the third time world champion, max verstappen's manager, you function on the belief that whatever max verstappen wanted, max verstappen shall get. but this time, after four years of working as his manager, you can't give him what he wants anymore and that was to stay.
author's note: that's it folks. welcome to the end. peace out (my hand is hurting like a bitch) NOT EDITED NOT BETA READ EXCUSE THE MISTAKES
tags: @whatamidoingwithmylife-ramdom @eugene-emt-roe @bellezaycafe @barnestatic @theseerbetweenus @wcnorris @notyouraveragemochii @lpab @vildetry06 @a-beaverhausen @formula1mount @loloekie @alucardsdaddyissues @juky-ps @cassianswh0reeee @devotedlycrookeddonut @amberpanda99 @supermaxv1 @evie-119 @spideylovin @harianaswhore @formulaal @landorris @onecojg @leclercdream @vicurious28 @c-losur3 @spookystitchery @0710khj @strollnstroll @justab-eautifulmess @ssrcsm i hope i didn't forget anyone
masterlist.
max: ANSWER ME
max: [NAME] I SWEAR TO GOD
max: I’LL FLY TO TEXAS RIGHT NOW I SWEAR
max: THIS IS ALL FUN AND GAMES FOR YOU ISNT IT
max: YOU FUCK ME AND THEN YOU LEAVE
max: YOU'RE ALL FUCKING THE SAME ALWAYS LEAVING ME
max: FUCK YOU [NAME]
max: TALK TO ME YOU COWARD
max: EXPLAIN YOURSELF
max: IM GOING INSANE HERE
Max has visited your apartment a total of two times since he’s given you the keys. The first time—Max remembers it was in early January 2020. You held a housewarming party disguised as a little lunch get-together as a thank-you for his gift. Daniel and him as well as two of your former roommates, Max recognizes them as Julia and Kendall from the PR team, are the only ones invited. You cooked pasta. Your mother’s recipe, you claimed. It easily became one of Max’s favorite dishes in the world and he requests you to cook it from time to time.
The second time, Max remembers going there again after the Monaco Grand Prix 2021. It’s been only a week after your breakup with Leo and four races before the incident with the Hamilton fan in Silverstone. The team holds a dinner to celebrate Max taking P1 and usually, you’re present in these types of things—the after parties and team dinners and all forms of team celebrations in general because you like celebrations but you're nowhere to be found.
Max finishes dinner quickly and excuses himself to Horner. He grabs a beer and drives himself to your apartment, because he knows you’re definitely not staying in the hotel with the team.
When you’re sad, you tend to hide away. It's an annoying habit. You make it your career to dig your nose into everyone’s problem—Max’s most especially—and provide everyone with the help you can offer. It's your love language, Max thinks, to be insanely helpful to everyone but the moment that the places switch and you’re the one who needs help, you run away because you refuse to bother everyone else with your problems despite the amount of people who are willing to return the favor you gave them in the past. It is very hypocritical of you.
He knocks on your door. Four slow knocks followed by three quick ones, so you’ll know it's him. It's an established pattern, a system that works for both of you. You shout for him to wait and Max does so, observing the details of the woodwork in front of him as he waits patiently for you. You have a very nice door.
You open the door. Max’s brows raised slightly at the sight of you. You're still in your Red Bull polo shirt but instead of the pencil skirt you were wearing during the race, you wore short shorts instead. Black, fitted, and they stop a little above your mid-thighs. You're barefoot, too. No YSL heels in sight.
Max turns into a lovely shade of pink. You don't notice it.
You have long legs despite being 5’5” only, which gives off the illusion that you’re very tall when you're actually not. Your body ratio consists of seventy-five percent legs and twenty-five percent upper body. You have lean legs. It's full of childhood scars—thin white lines that are barely noticeable because of how old they are. You have well-built calves and dainty ankles, which look weird but also look right, and your feet are veiny, jagged lines of green blue on skin. Max thinks it's because you wear heels every day.
“Somethin’ wrong, man?” your voice sounds nasal, hoarse, and deep at the same time. Your eyes and nose are red and Max knows full well that you’ve been crying over Leo again and yet you carry yourself as if you're fine, standing in front of him with your shoulders straightened and your tone professional.
Max never liked the bitterness that washes over him whenever he sees you with Leo. But at that moment, he’ll rather endure the bitterness that chokes him until he thinks he’s about to pass out if that makes you alright, if that makes you stop crying.
“I have beer.”
It's a lame thing to say. He should have said something better. He should have asked if you’re alright, should have asked why you were crying, should have asked if there's anything you need him to do just so you’ll feel better. But his mind blanks and he just thrusted the beer forward.
You smile, shaking your head. You take the beer from his hands gratefully, “I have pasta. Wanna go in?”
It's a fair trade. You love beer. He loves your pasta. And so, he entered your apartment.
He faces your door for the third time in 2023. A million thoughts run around his brain per second as his eyes train on the wood patterns of your front door. Dread pools in his stomach as he holds the door knob. He only holds it, not twisting it and pushing it open just yet.
Max is stalling. He knows that. He shouldn't be stalling. He knows that, too.
He dreads what's waiting for him on the other side of the door. He can hear your voice in the back of his skull, saying, “Pussy. You risk your life and drive a rocket ship for a livin’ and you’re afraid of openin’ a damn door?”
Max takes a deep breath and opens the door. Silence and emptiness greets him.
Your apartment has always been bare. You refuse to buy carpets, curtains, houseplants, decorative furnishings or anything that can make your loft apartment seem like someone actually lives there.
(“It's expensive here,” you said.
“I’ll pay,” Max offered.
“No,” you shook your head. “I’ll just bring something from home.”
You never did.)
Max’s feet lead him to your living room. Dust accumulates on top of your glass coffee table and couch. Max remembers them coming along when he bought the apartment. You never got them changed.
His brows furrowed when his eyes landed on the familiar looking box that sits atop the coffee table. He strides towards it, head tilting to read the little pink sticky note attached to it. It reads: Sorry Max, I can't steal more from Kelly.
Max’s entire world crumbles down. He opens the shoe box and sees the shoe, arranged carefully in place.
He hurriedly reaches for the folder next to it and reads the writings inside.
Max, I know you’d be the one who’d find this one day. By that time, I’ll be in Texas already. I don't know if I’d have told you that I resigned already. If I didn't, that's because I’m a pussy. Sorry.
Anyways, I will say this as straightforwardly as I can because I think I had been a pussy long enough.
I resigned, Max. I won't be your manager by 2024.
Max keeps re-reading the last two sentences just to make sure he’s reading it correctly.
I resigned, Max. I won't be your manager.
I resigned, Max.
resigned.
Max hurls the shoe box and it zooms in the air and hits the wall. He fists his hair and pulls. A scream erupts in his throat. The neighbors are going to file a noise complaint but Max cannot bring himself to care. He’s the one whose heart is breaking here.
He grabs the folder. Max feels something fall on his foot. He looks down.
A beaded bracelet. Navy blue and red—the color of Red Bull. There are three white beads in the bracelet and on those three white beads are the letters M and V—his initials—and the number 1—his current number.
Max drops on his knees. He picks up the little thing with trembling hands. He brings the bracelet to his chest and Max falls apart. This time, you’re not here to hold him together.
max: hey im planning to visit the US
max: do you think you can show me around?
Logan Sargeant is a good driver. That's a given. It's his profession. But the way he drives; it's making Max sleepy.
“So….” Logan begins awkwardly. “I’m assuming you're visiting Texas because of [Name].”
Max nods, “Yeah.”
“You're not mad at her, are you?” Logan asks. “For resigning?”
“She told you?”
So you told the American boy but not him? Max cannot help but be offended now.
“Well, I kinda assumed? Liam mentioned it to the other day, who heard the news from his cousin.”
Max’s brows furrow.
“Lawson?”
“Yes, Lawson.”
Max remembers the kid all too well. Liam Lawson has overtaken him in Singapore after all. It's embarrassing. Watch out, Max, you teased him. Liam’s out to get you.
“Liam probably heard it from Leo.”
“Leo?”
Logan is mentioning too many names. Well, it’s just two but two is still many for his brain to comprehend right now.
“Yeah, Leo and Liam are cousins.”
Max pauses.
“Leo and [Name] still talk so I guess [Name] told Leo, who must have mentioned it to Liam, who then mentioned it in the groupchat with me and Osc—are you okay?”
Max tries his hardest not to scream.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” he says, voice tight. “I’m fine. How far are we from Austin?”
They drive past a sign that says “Welcome to Austin.”
“Well, it looks like we’ve just arrived.”
Max is once again offended that Logan knows where you live while he doesn't. Vista Del Pueblo, Logan tells him the name of the place as they hop off the car. It's funny how close you lived from the Circuit of the Americas. No wonder you always requested to be home after the Austin GP before flying off to the next city.
The two-storey yellow and red brick house is empty. Despite that, it looks like a perfect picture of a happy childhood home. The backyard and the patio is wide. Beside the driveway stands an olden tree. Below the tree is a reclining chair that looks like it has gone through a dust storm and a thousand rains.
“It’s empty,” Max announces. Logan nods.
“Yeah.”
Logan ends up approaching an old woman in the neighboring house who was sweeping dust off her porch and asks her if she knows the [Last Name] family’s whereabouts.
“They haven't returned home since Christmas,” she replies. “Everyone in the neighborhood tried contacting them but no one got through. Ever since Julio died… It's like the entire family followed after him.”
Max and Logan stiffen, shocked at the news that's just been revealed.
Julio died….?
Max needs to find you. Urgently. He needs to see if you're okay.
The sun retires for the night and Max decides that it's time for Logan and him to retire as well. Logan drives them to a hotel and Max pays for two rooms despite Logan insisting that he can pay for his own. They grab dinner at the hotel restaurant, in a private area that Max paid for.
“You’re not angry at her, aren't you?” Logan asks for the second time that day. His plate is half empty. Meanwhile, Max’s plate is barely touched. His appetite significantly decreased. He keeps thinking about you, worried about how you're coping with Julio’s death. You are never the best person when it comes to dealing with pain. Physical pain, you can handle. You’re barely fazed when you burn your hand in the oven, when you hit your hip at the corner of the table, when you accidentally get scratches and you don't even notice it until someone points out the blood that terrifyingly drips down your arm. Max can still remember how you dealt with your breakup with Leo. All those nights crying, the unhealthy fixation in work so you won't have any space feeling human emotions, the moments where you disconnect with reality that Max has to pull you out of many times. The death of a father is a million times worse than a breakup. Max imagines a thousand scenarios in his mind. He needs to be with you right now. He needs to make sure you're alright.
“I hope you're not. You obviously are but I still hope you're not,” Logan continues. “She was always going to leave, you know? She told me in January. She told me that she needs to—
Max accidentally throws the glass of water he was holding. It falls onto the floor. The sound of shattering glass echoes throughout the room. Logan stares at Max with his eyes wide. A cleaning crew comes in a hurry and cleans it up. Max doesn't apologize, he only says, “send me the bill later” and sends the crew out. He turns to Logan.
“She needs to what?”
“You're angry.”
You reminded me, Max said in his mind.
“And?” Max raises his brow. “She needs to what?”
Logan lets out a shaky breath, “She needs to become an engineer or else she’ll never forgive herself.”
Manager. Engineer. What's so damn special about that engineering position anyway? Why are you so hell bent on leaving Max? Red Bull pays you more than an engineer. Hell, Max is even willing to raise your salary to the same amount as half of his annual salary in Red Bull if it keeps you from leaving him. Max is willing to pay for your student loans and refund everything you paid to USC during your college years.
Max pinches the bridge of his nose, letting out a deep sigh. He’s feeling too many emotions all at once.
“I think it's best if you talk to Leo?” Logan suggests. Max appreciates that he’s trying to be helpful but mentioning Leo brings nothing but more anger in him. Fucking Leo. Why does he know where you are? He’s your fucking ex for god’s sake. Why are you even still talking to your ex? “He’s close with [Name]. I think he can help you.”
Max contemplates.
He doesn't want to ask fucking Leo.
And he’s not that desperate to seek help from him.
Logan writes his number on a table napkin. Max pockets it.
After dinner, Max sits inside his hotel room. He dials the number Logan gave him because if he’ll tell you where you are, he can swallow his pride for a day. It takes three redials and two rings before Leo answers.
“Hello?”
“Hi, is this Leo Stark?”
“Yes, this is he. May I ask who’s calling?”
“It’s Max Verstappen.”
Silence.
“Hello, are you still there?”
Max hears a loud crash followed by a series and a whole lot of ruffling, “Sorry about that. Do you mind repeating that?”
“Max Verstappen.”
“Ah, so I’m not hearing things. I thought I was hearing things. Sorry. Do you wish to talk to James Vowles? I can transfer the call to him.”
“No,” Max says. “I want to talk to you. It's about [Name].”
“Oh.” A pause. “You're going to ask me where she is, aren't you?”
“You're smart.”
“Well, mate, too bad. I’m afraid I can’t tell you.”
“You can’t?”
“I can’t,” he echoes. “I mean I can but I won’t.”
“So you know where she is.” It's not a question. Something bitter rears its ugly head in his stomach. His bitterness and anger now dwarf his worry for you in size. Fuck Logan for reminding him that you always wanted to leave. Fuck Leo for knowing where you are.
“I’m going to ask again and you better give me the answer I want. Where is she?”
“The answer you want?” Leo clicks his tongue. “It’s always what you want. Have you considered what she wants? Does [Name] even want you to find her?”
“You don't know what you're talking about—”
“I do,” Leo interrupts and the way he sounds so sure of himself aggravates Max. “I do, mate. Believe it or not.”
“I see what's happening here,” Max sneers. “I’ve heard you and [Name] broke up because she was prioritizing me over you. Is this it? Are you doing this out of petty jealousy?”
Leo sighs, “You’re making this about you again.”
Max opens his mouth to retort but Leo cuts him off, “Let me get this straight with you, mate. When we were still dating, not once have I been jealous of you. I understood that she works for you and that she has to put you first in certain situations. After all, you’re her job. I’m just the home she returns to after work.”
Max’s jaw clenches. Leo was her home. It was the truth no matter how much Max hated it. Leo does not stop there.
“I have no issue with her focusing on you. The only problem I have with it is her tendency to focus more on you than herself. If you come to her at a very vulnerable time, especially now, there’s a chance that she’s going to focus on you again. She deals with grief in a very unhealthy way and I don't want her to do that. Not when she needs to properly grieve for her father.”
Leo sighs again.
“So please, mate, just this once. Think about what she needs right now and it’s not you.”
You don't need Max.
But Max needs you.
That is one of the most painful truths he’s ever been given.
“She’ll come back. She always does. It may take months. Years, even. Just… Let her grieve and let her pick herself up. There are people who don't want help because they need to do it themselves or else it won't feel fulfilling. [Name] is no different. Also, I’ll be honest with you, mate. I don't want you coming to her before she achieves her dreams. You’re so used to [Name] giving you everything you want that you forgot that she, too, is someone who needs and wants and dreams. She just wanted to be an engineer.”
“And how is this my fault?”
“You knew what she wanted. You agreed to help her achieve it. You didn't allow her to move to Renault. You told her that you’ll ask your team principal after you win and you did win but you didn't keep your end of the bargain.”
“I—”
“Who are you to control her dreams? If you love her, you would have asked Horner, at least. She knows you never asked Horner. Maybe she would have never resigned if you tried to talk to Horner, but you let your selfishness win.”
Max feels all breath punched out of his lungs.
“You had the power to ask your team principal yet you didn't and she has to watch you achieve your dreams while she can't. Unfair, don’t you think?”
A pause.
“Just start considering what she feels, mate. That's all.”
“I am considering her. Always.” This is the closest to a love declaration he can admit out loud. The purest form of love is consideration, they say. When someone thinks about how things would make you feel, pays attention to detail, holds you in regard when making decisions that could affect you, keeps promises so you won’t be disappointed, that's when you know they love you.
“Are you really?”
Is he really?
“Take care of her for me, Verstappen. Even from afar. You can do that.”
The call ends.
Max stares blankly at the wall, still holding his phone against his ear. Then, he hurls it across the room. He aggressively drags his hand through his face.
Max flies back to Belgium after Austin to spend the rest of his off-season with his mother and sister. He apologizes to Logan for his behavior. Logan is a kind man, he forgives easily. He drives Max to the airport.
The next day, an article is posted, titled—AN UNLIKELY FRIENDSHIP: MAX VERSTAPPEN OF RED BULL RACING AND LOGAN SARGEANT OF WILLIAMS RACING SPOTTED DRIVING AROUND AUSTIN.
On New Year's Eve, Kelly messages Max. He can't say that he’s surprised. In truth, he’s been expecting her to message him, whether it's to beg to take her back or to curse him out or to tell him something about Penelope or it's to inform him that she's going to pick up her things in Max’s penthouse in Monaco.
kelly: i sent someone to pick up our things in your place
max: okay
kelly: also
kelly: *sent a photo*
kelly: she apologized for something that's not her fault
kelly: you have a good one
The photo is a screenshot of Kelly’s conversation with you, dated December 30. That was yesterday.
you: sorry about the breakup
you: i didn't know about the shoes
you: i didn't take it
you: im so sorry
you: i hope you're not too hurt
kelly: i think i’m the one who’s been taking him from you
kelly: take care of him for me
you: thank you for loving him
you: but i can’t do what you're asking
you: not anymore
“What’s wrong, baby?”
Max looks up to see his mother’s worried face.
“Oh, uh,” he closes his phone and almost drops it. Fucking clumsy fingers, fucking messages, fucking pain. “Nothing, Mum.”
His mother does not look convinced.
“You know you can tell me anything, right? No need to hide it. You may be a world champion now but you’ll always be my baby,” she says. “What does [Name] always say? Even champions are allowed to cry.”
At the mention of you, Max looks away.
“Tell me. Is it Kelly?”
The last time Max cried in his mother’s arms was when he was eleven. Jos always said boys should never cry. That boys who cry are weak. And weak people do not become champions. Max wanted to be a champion so he never allowed himself to be weak. Weakness only becomes a weakness if it is known so he learned to bottle it up over the years and all the bottled grief became anger. Hence, the birth of his serious anger issues.
He’s twenty-seven now with three WDC titles under his belt. He’s outgrown both of his parents in terms of physical size and in career accomplishments but when his mother’s arms wrapped around him, he allowed himself to become a little boy again. He allowed himself to be weak.
“She left me, Mum,” Max whispers, hugging her mother close. Sophie rubs his back in soothing circles.
“You’ll find someone, Max,” his mother assures.
“I don't want someone else,” he says. “I want [Name].”
“Oh.”
Sophie blinks.
“Max, you—”
“Please, don't make me say it, Mum,” Max pleads, squeezing his eyes shut. A lone tear drips down his cheek. “Don't make me say I’m in love with [Name].”
Max sends an email to Christian that he’s not going to take a manager in 2024. Christian tells him it's a bad idea, that he needs a manager because he’s becoming busy with his schedules and everyone wants a piece of time with the third-time world driver’s champion but Max cannot care less. If it’s not you, he’d rather have no one at all.
Max wants to learn how to get used without you on his side. He did a little reflecting over pre-season and realized how he had become so dependent on you. He learns the functions of a Google calendar and how to use a Notion page.
Max just knows 2024 is going to be a shitty year for him.
Bahrain, Max remembers, is your favorite track. He doesn't know why you like Bahrain. Bahrain is hot. Bahrain is not as exciting as other race tracks. Personally, he prefers Spa-Francorchamps.
He also remembers that you like watching the air show. You never said it outright but you always have this smile on your face while watching the jets painting the sky with colors so Max kind of figured.
Max snaps a picture of the jets in the sky. He opens his Instagram and searches for your name in his message list. When he presses his conversation with you, the first thing that greets him is his spam of angry messages. All delivered, all unread. The last message, Max remembers, was sent when he visited Austin with Logan to search for you.
max: SO YOU TOLD LEO BUT NOT ME? DO I EVEN MEAN SOMETHING TO YOU?
His finger hovers on the send button. He lets out a sigh and he pockets his phone instead.
Daniel approaches Max after Max wins Jeddah.
“Hey, have you been talking to [Name]?” he asks.
“Not lately,” answers Max. Not since she left me, Max thinks.
Daniel scratches his nape. “I think she's angry at me.”
“You’ve been talking?”
Now, Max is offended. So you talked to Leo, you talked to Kelly, you talked to Daniel, but you made no effort to talk to him? When was he going to get a message from you?
“Well, I kinda…” Daniel pulls out his phone. “I just checked up on her? And she replied like a week later. She sounds kinda angry? I don't know. Do you think she sounds angry?”
Daniel shows Max his last conversation with [Name].
daniel: hey!
daniel: heard from max what happened
daniel: we miss you! you should visit come by in bahrain! the opening is gonna be sick
you: can't sorry
daniel: aww how about jeddah
daniel: i’ll fly you out don't worry about traveling commercial
you: idk man
you: might be too much noise and distraction for you
you: good luck in jeddah tho
A very passive aggressive reply.
“Yeah, she is,” Max supplies.
Max wins Bahrain. Max wins Jeddah. Australia, on the other hand, is a funny story. First, the Williams team pulls an annoying move. Poor Logan. He had to give his car to his teammate and sit out of the race.
Max visits him after the news was officially announced. He finds the American racer in his driver room, sitting sadly on the bed with his head bent low, after asking a rookie Williams mechanic, who trembled at the sight of him.
It's a pitiful looking room. Max has a villa for a driver room. Logan doesn't even have a closet for his overalls, just a rack held together by hopes and dreams. The bed is so tiny and narrow that Max is sure he wouldn't even fit if he lies in there unless he assumes a tight fetal position.
“You’re here,” Logan stands from the bed, eyes wide in surprise. He hasn’t expected Max to visit him out of all the people in the grid. Not even his own teammate performed that courtesy. “Uh, I don't have anything. Here, have my seat. Do you want me to grab—”
“It's fine,” Max holds his palm up. “Sit back down, Logan.”
Logan slowly sits back down and moves to the side so Max can have a space to sit on. Max occupies Logan’s given space beside him. Their shoulders and elbows are touching.
“Are you okay?” he asks.
Logan nods.
“Yeah, I’m okay.”
Max nods, but he doesn't believe him. Comfortable silence wraps the entire room. It lasted less than five minutes.
“You should break the car,” Max suggests seriously. “So no one can drive it, too.”
A soft laugh escaped Logan’s throat.
The door swings open and enters Leo, who freezes when he sees Max Verstappen sitting next to Logan. He looks at the two F1 drivers then back in his hand, where he was holding a large Stanley cup and two styro cups.
“Great, I only brought two cups,” he says, kicking the door behind him to close it. “Should have told me the world champion is coming. I would have brought the expensive wine.”
“What do you have there?”
“Beer,” Leo lifts the Stanley cup and gives it a small shake. “Transferred it to a Stanley cup so no one would notice.”
“James wouldn’t be happy,” says Logan, frowning.
“We’re not happy with him either,” Leo retorts, pouring the beer into the two cups. He hands one to Logan and another to Max.
“I suggested breaking his car,” Max inserts, accepting the cup. He still feels a bit weird to be hanging out with Leo like this. He’s angry still, but he’s not as angry as he was in Austin. Leo’s words, though Max would never admit it out loud, made sense. You left because of Max’s own selfishness. He was the one who had cut your wings and thought that his gesture was out of love when in fact, it was an action born out of his desperation and his fear of being left behind by you.
“Should I?” Leo humors his suggestion, shrugging his shoulders.
Logan sighs, shaking his head at the two. He can’t believe they're both older than him but still wield that petty immaturity.
“Please don't.”
Second, the RB20 has brake issues in Australia so Max ends up retiring in the middle of the race. Max hears everyone cheer at his retirement. That's when you know he’s good. When everyone wishes for his downfall. Everybody in Red Bull grows wary watching their prized driver stomp inside the garage, looking like he has a lot to say to the mechanics. His head is as hot as the burning car at the pit.
Max hears two people whispering amongst themselves:
“Mad Max is back.”
“Where's [Name] when you need her? He’s going to get blow up at us now.”
“[Name] really is a saintess because she’s the only one who can handle him when he’s angry.”
“I never appreciated her efforts before but I am now. I hope she never left.”
Max hopes she didn't, too. Out of all the people in Red Bull, he’s the one who wishes that she hasn't left the most. Now, he’s even angrier.
Max wins P1. If he doesn't, it's a DNF. The problem is the reliability of the car, not him. Never him.
He steps foot in Austin soil again on October 15th for the 19th race of the season, eager to win another P1 and increase his chance of snatching his fourth consecutive world driver’s championship title.
Fortunately, the RB20 doesn't fail him mid-race. The Dutch national anthem is heard all around the Circuit of the Americas and Max retires to the garage, too tired for any form of celebration. He wants to change out of his racing gear. He still has to fix his Google calendar and check out a few things in his Notion page. Who knew being your own manager can be so tiring?
Kendall comes by, a camera in hand. She snaps a quick picture, only one take because she knows Max hates taking pictures. Max believes you mentioned it to her before and has asked her to take the pictures quickly so he wouldn't get annoyed. You were always too thoughtful, always mindful of the little details. Perhaps, it was why he fell in the first place.
Max pivots on his heels to leave after he hears the camera click.
“Oh Max,” Kendall stops him. “[Name] came by earlier. She said congratulations.”
Max entire world stops spinning. Everything else became a mass of white noise.
“Where's she?” Max demands.
“She left already, said she’s got somewhere to be—”
Max sprints to his driver room, grabs his keys and ran all the way to the parking lot where his car was parked, not minding the screams and the questioning stares he received from the people he ran past them to his car. His mind only focuses on one thing—he has to get to you.
He drives down to the familiar road that he and Logan drove in last December 2023. He's racing against time and like all races he'd participated in, he hopes to win. He hopes that he’ll be able to see you. Max arrives at the red and yellow brick house in Vista Del Pueblo, jogging up until the front door and knocking. Four slow knocks followed by three quick ones, so you’ll know it's him.
No one answers. Max jogs up to the window at the front and peeks inside. The house is still empty as it had been in December.
Max's shoulders sagged.
He wasn't fast enough.
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transformerskinkfest · 4 months ago
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Transformers Kinkfest Prompt List 2024
The prompt list is HERE! Thank you all for your suggestions!
Each day has one Transformers kink and one alternative, more general kink (in italics at the end) - use one, use both, combine them any way you like! (Each kink also has a little blurb, but this is just to give you a bit more context on the more unusual ones. Don't feel bound by the explanation - if you want to take a prompt in a totally different direction, go for it!!)
Please remember to tag #transformerskinkfest or #tf kinkfest when you post your work. You can also post to the AO3 collection here!
PROMPTS:
17 October: Alt mode interfacing. What it says on the tin - sex in alternate mode! (Alt prompt: Collar)
18 October: Faction play. Could be two (or more) characters of different factions, or characters pretending to be different factions than they are. Not limited to Autobots and Decepticons - if you want someone pretending to be in the Primal Vanguard or the DJD, go for it! (Alt prompt: Roleplay)
19 October: Xeno. Human (or humanformer)/Transformer pairings, or Transformers with any other sentient alien species. (Alt prompt: Threesome or moresome)
20 October: Fuel siphoning. Siphoning or pumping fuel out of or into your parter(s), and all the sensations/emotions that could go with it. (Alt prompt: Feeding)
21 October: Compatibility modes OR cultural differences. Playing with cultural differences - between citystates, colonies, factions, or Cybertronians and other species - in the berth. This is the compatibility mode concept, from the person who suggested it: "The concept is that bots for whatever reason (forged, constructed, modded, upgraded?) have "compatibility modes" that allow them to more easily interface with beings on other planets. i e Eurythman mode is more sonic focused, or Lithonian mode includes piezoelectric features standard Cybertronian mode doesn't have, or Quintesson mode has more tentacles, etc. And the bot(s) with this kink want to run compatibility mode even when interfacing with another Cybertronian for whatever reason. Like, "let's do it like they do in Menonia, or Odessyx, or Nexus Zero."... How is that mode different, how did they learn of it, what's fun about it for them now with current partner(s)?" (Alt prompt: Public)
22 October: Sentient vehicles. Driving, flying, or just being completely enveloped within your partner (or having them completely inside you) in alt mode. (Alt prompt: Overstimulation)
23 October: Tentacles. Lots of beings - and a fair number of bots - have them... maybe more than we think! (Alt prompt: Bondage)
24 October: Remote transfer. Getting thoughts/information/sensations beamed into your brain by your partner - even at a distance. (Alt prompt: Sensory deprivation)
25 October: Plug 'n' play. Sex via physically plugging into your partner. (Alt prompt: Pet play)
26 October: Obsolete or unusual equipment/abilities. Some bots may have systems that don't initially seem compatible with (or are just a surprise to) their partners - maybe because they're older models, maybe they were created for a specific purpose or person, etc. Doesn't have to be limited to interface equipment - could include other body parts (hi there, Tailgate's suction cup mouth!) or even unusual/Outlier powers. (Alt prompt: Double penetration)
27 October: Sentient weapons. Alt mode sex meets weapons play! From the person who suggested this prompt: "Either A. a bot wants a sentient weapon (gun-former, targetmaster, Mini-Cons that combine into a sword, etc) to be involved in their interfacing with another bot, while in their weapon form; or B. The character(s) who is/are the sentient weapon initiate the request to be involved with a bot or bots interfacing while remaining in their weapon form." (Alt prompt: Biting)
28 October: Tactile interfacing. Basically, sex outside of the sticky or plug 'n' play models: sex that consists of touching your partner's frame, toying with their wires, playing with their EM field - your imagination is the limit. (Alt prompt: Orgasm denial)
29 October: Body control/system takeover. Controlling or hacking your partner's body, either via plugging in or remotely. (Alt prompt: Domination)
30 October: Wing kink/kibble kink. Wings, doors, wheels, antennae - it's all good! (Alt prompt: Size difference)
31 October: Free choice!
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hephaestiions · 16 days ago
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day 7 of @hprecfest — the best of your OTP
wit's end with this prompt, went through all my oldest bookmarks to pinpoint what about harry potter & draco malfoy sank its fangs into me eleven years ago and— look—
i can't remember the first h/d fic i read, but it would have been from @dictacontrion's daily drarry quotes initiative— a splendid system queueing delicious h/d snippets that ran from 2013 to early 2022. dicta wrote many of my early h/d favourites, the stuff that really got me into this ship, but the DDQ initiative was my first exposure to what prolific reading & fandom engagement looked like. DDQ led me to dicta's curated recs here on tumblr and here on LJ— gorgeous selections that were a crash course in learning my tastes.
hungry for more lists (still didn't quite trust myself with ao3/ffnet's search functions), i found @capiturecs' meticulous & immensely navigable LJ rec archive + rec tag & @gracerene-recs' drarry tag. i still go back to these, especially for older fics i don't see recced all that much anymore.
@drarryspecificrecs' reccing & fic finding catalogues running since 2017 are something else; their work on their main blog, on @drarryspecificrecsdaily & as part of @lostdrarryfics (if i'm not mistaken) is an enduring force in this fandom. their consistent contributions put so many underrated fics on my dash i wouldn't encounter otherwise, and it's always a joy to get the tag notif when i post something on ao3. (also here's a drarry reccers masterlist curated by LDF, i haven't checked out everyone on it, but go forth & enjoy!)
@bridenore has been reading fic on a scale i can only aspire to, their continuously updating rec tag is such a diverse list of reads across tropes & fests. @mxlfoydraco's one-stop-shop masterlist is also glorious.
@thedrarrylibrarian's friends of the library initiative is such a fun take on showing love to fanwork & building community— every rec, interview & adjacent commentary felt like having a warm mug of hot chocolate with a friend. here's the masterlist!
i'm also loving the collaborative brilliance of @drarry-reccage ('get recced!' is phenomenal energy)— seven pals putting time into fresh recs. individual tags: @cailynwrites' tag here; @dontthrowsticksatme's tag here; @garagepaperback's tag here; @kk1smet's tag here; @mallstars' tag here; @pl0tty's tag here; @sweatersinthesummer's tag here.
i also love @sweet-s0rr0w's recs (masterlist & tag); i love how inventive she is with themes (the collaborative sex scene rec initiative is fucking inspired). sweet is also doing recfest, check out the tag!
@ghaniblue's monthly reading lists are always fun & fresh + acari's rec tag includes their recfest entries, featuring some drarry, some other ships (including rarepairs), so go have a look!
in general, i've always loved creative recs, so @onbeinganangel's embroidery recs were some of the most fantastic stuff to ever cross my dash (i was lucky enough to get one for my birthday a few years ago & it changed my life). wistfulrats themed recs + commentary were also brilliant. this author list by @bogglebeans was also wonderfully unique & had great takes.
and! of course! @sitp-recs whose blog & person are both gems, whose participation in this fandom is an absolute beacon of light. liv reads & recs with such infectious enthusiasm & i only realised how much of a love song reccing could be for works & creators i enjoy and admire through following her. here's her masterlist of masterlists & every link is delightful. liv also runs incredibly, incredibly kind initiatives, the hidden gems series stands out, as does running @yours-drarry blog which is a platform to send appreciation to fandom participants, so if you've got some love to show someone this holiday season, hop on over!
this is by no means a comprehensive overview of all the reccing that goes on in this fandom, i'm probably missing much more than i've counted (speaking of, if you rec & i've missed you, let me know and i'll follow your tag). but among the many things i adore about h/d fandom, the robust reccing culture occupies one of the top spots, not only because it shows appreciation for creators but because it's such a distilled display of excitement for participating in fandom— all of us poking each other and being poked to go look at that cool, brilliant, fantastic thing, jittery to wax poetic about it. reccers held my hand in fandom when i didn't know what i was doing, relentlessly cheered (other) creators on, cultivated a participative space for readers & lurkers and set the bar in so many ways.
to everyone who keeps the h/d fandom alive— reccers, but also writers, artists, podficcers, fest moderators, editors, cheerleaders, readers, lurkers, everyone, everyone, past & present: you are the best of this ship.
for all the love, time & effort you've poured into this space, thank you.
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thr0wnawayy · 5 months ago
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Chapter 429 has been my Dabi's Dance
I can't stop smiling.
I wanted to start off by saying thank you. Not to Hori, but to you all. Every last one of you in these tags for your contributions. Be it analysis, re-reads, fan works or simply your perspectives. I look forward to seeing what you will make in the future.
So, Thank you.
I suppose I should start at the beginning. MHA was always in the background of my life and I hated it. I don't watch anime and yet still MHA related media would make it's way onto my socials in all it's obnoxious forms. This went on for years.
And then suddenly, it stopped. It seemed like MHA's craze had died down, I'd still see it from time to time through merchandise but never to the consistency it had prior.
That was until Dabi's Dance was published and the net went wild.
I knew a few things about Endeavor from my past exposure, he was universally hated and abused his kids and wife (to the point she scalded her son in a fit of psychosis).
Deciding I had nothing better to do, I found myself searching to see what kind of consequences would befall such a monstrous character.
Would he fall like Icarus, be torn apart by the public, how would the family he ruined react to the news?.
And then, nothing. No punishment, no reaction. Just dead air.
I recall that my face dropped internally. My blank expression mirrored my phone screen's sterile nature, as it displayed the information in front of me.
He got away with it. So I did some digging and it got so much worse.
Bakugo's evasion of any consequences or damages, coddled and shielded by Hori's inability to go through on anything.
Hawks who murdered a near crippled man on a hypothesis, for the mere crime of having the "wrong" quirk, for not giving up, for being "unlucky"
Aizawa, Hori's little mouthpiece. who decides to play judge, jury and executioner with the futures of students he's supposed to be teaching. Only for the Nedzu and the narrative to allow him, his friends turned into lapdogs that agree to the letter.
The Commission who strive to keep theirrotting husk of a system alive through assasins, child soldiers and indoctrination.
Even if it's gears must be lubricated with blood, even if it means lying to the world and having them clean up the mess. They MUST stay on top, the illusion must be upheld.
I just couldn't fathom how this was seen as a good thing.
And somewhere along the way I began to feel something akin to hate. Not your typical ire, one powered by anger, no.
I wanted to see how low Hori would go, just how horrifically he would mangle a series that everyone had once praised.
I wanted to witness what wonders a jaded community would create, to show what they were capable of (to create and understand MHA in a manner Hori wishes he could even emulate a fraction of)
I wished to see your own expressions of love and hatred.
The thought of witnessing the breaking point, the dust settling to expose all the glaring flaws and infested wounds of MHA. It buzzed in my brain like electricity.
The idea that when all was said and done, you, the people would do what Hori couldn't/wouldn't and forge the bones and salvagble bits of MHA into a story worth remembering.
One where abusers are punished for their crimes instead of rewarded
Where victims can have a voice, feel and grow, carve their own paths and move forward from their trauma.
Where the implications of MHA's rotting and disingenuous society get explored instead of swept under the rug
Where people get a chance.
I waited eagerly for the day it would all fall apart.
So, do you know what I did when I logged onto the tag and saw your posts!?.
I laughed, the shrill giggle in the back of my throat quickly surging into an almost manic cackle. It was like lightning, vindicating and sobering all at once. My face was stretched to it's absolute limits with how wide my grin was. I could almost hear the shattering of MHA's last bit of integrity and I loved it.
The realization MHA's greatest threat was the author himself, It's one that I grasped long ago (as far back as the Dark Dekiru Arc) and I'm sure most of you understood this as well.
But to see that more of you are starting to get it, to realize there's no going back. That as the curtains draw near and the lights begin to dim, there is no other side here. Violence begets violence and Hori's gone past the event horizon.
It feels, hopeful. Perhaps we can build something worth saving.
It's been a wild ride so far and it's still ongoing. Hori's time is long over, it has been for a while now, so I suppose what I'm asking Is:
Now It's Your Turn, what's your play?
_______________________________________
Update:
IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING!
youtube
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ms-demeanor · 1 year ago
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Not to be rude or derailing your answer to the ask about the scorched earth post, but I do think quite genuinely that the site is becoming more openly hostile to its userbase, or at the very least its disabled userbase. While I’m not a fan of mobbing people’s personal blogs in targeted harassment campaigns, I think some people are also ignoring that staff blatantly said in a recent post that epileptic users would need to pay for ad-free to have their safety assured
I kind of don’t think that’s being ethical or user friendly, to me that sounds like they’re refusing to meet basic accessibility requests and answering with ‘pay us money to be safe’. Strobing and flashing ads aren’t just eyestraining, they can legitimately lead to serious injuries for epileptic folk, and telling people with epilepsy to just pay up or get lost is kinda… I dunno… disgusting?
So it looks like in a livestream (not on a post so far as I've been able to see) either photomatt or zingring made a glib and inappropriate response to an epileptic user asking about flashing ads and suggested that maybe they needed to pay for ad-free.
That's bad, I don't like it, and if it was supposed to be a joke it was a shitty one.
Zingring, tumblr's COO addressed that comment in a post where she said:
Buying ad-free (or gifting ad-free to someone else) is always an option, but that is not the solution (and of course, some folks simply can’t afford it). Sorry that it sounded dismissive in the session! That was not my intent.
I still think that's inappropriate (it's not that ad free isn't *the* solution, ad free shouldn't be *a* solution to accessibility), but it looks like Zingring has addressed this issue multiple times.
She got tagged in this post listing ways that tumblr could improve accessibility for photosensitive users and seems to have pretty consistently followed up; she has explained that there are rules against flashing ads that are sometimes violated by the advertisers and asks people to please report ads that break those rules so those advertisers can be blocked, has noted that there is apparently a "stop all autoplay" option in the works behind the scenes. She does also seem to take it seriously when users reach out with complaints about accessibility issues and seems to be willing to explore options.
Looking through that blog, this does not seem to be a site that is hostile to users with accessibility issues so much as, like everything else that's wrong around here, it is ridiculously understaffed so every project that someone wants to have as a priority is a project that someone else needs put on the backburner.
However, to very gently push back: how much of what you're experiencing as hostility from tumblr is actual hostility and how much of it is seeing posts like this, which suggests that tumblr is removing accessibility features because the lightbox didn't have double-tap-to-zoom on mobile for some users for a short while, claims that the blocking/flagging issue is a false flag against trans women, shared the inaccurate fearmongering post about tumblr live's ToS, and also claimed that tumblr "allowed" flashing ads that violated the in-place rules that tumblr has for advertising?
(this kind of goes with the 'nobody understands the ToS' but also nobody understands ads; tumblr does not have enough staff to look over the ads that go on their site every day, no social media company does, they rely on advertiser agreements as a sort of enhanced honor system and reports from users if the advertisers don't hold up their end of the bargain; the only way around this for any site that uses ads is to not have ads and that post is explicitly saying don't pay for tumblr because they are doing ads wrong - either they have to run ads and some bad ones are going to slip through and users will have to report them or tumblr will have to be 100% paid by the users or tumblr will go away. If you see ads that are unsafe for photosensitive users on *any* website you should report them to the site because the site almost certainly doesn't know that there's an advertiser violating the ad ToS unless someone tells them)
Generally speaking, I am actually *not* seeing worsening accessibility features, I'm seeing improvements compared to where we were five years ago - alt text on images is now built-in and devs are working hard on making tumblr more compatible with screen readers (as noted in the changes blog regularly); tumblr itself started offering different dashboard themes for users after years of complaints about contrast levels and readability; the "tiktok/twitterified" desktop dash view that everyone hates is supposed to be more readable on wider screens.
Compare this post in October of 2022 when Changes celebrated adding animations for posting (and told users those could only be disabled at an OS or browser level) with this post from July 2023 when they rolled back a feature because of an unexpected use case that could cause problems for photosensitive users.
These aren't things that I'd expect to see from a company that didn't care about accessibility, or that was openly hostile to questions around making the site more accessible.
I don't disagree with you that the comment from the stream about buying ad free was inappropriate; it absolutely was and it must have made photosensitive users feel like shit. But in the three months since that comment tumblr has been very responsive about getting flashing ads removed as soon as possible and seems to be working on more permanent fixes. I think this may be an instance of able-bodied people not realizing how shitty and dehumanizing their joke was (and it was) and taking the steps to do better.
If you don't think they're doing better, I probably can't convince you. I certainly don't think that tumblr is perfect about accessibility and I think that users need to continue pushing for improved user control of how the site displays and interacts with various devices. But compared to the kind of responses users complaints got from staff in 2018? I feel like things have improved a lot.
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sasaranurude · 8 months ago
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Okay. I've been playing Tokyo Debunker today, since the release happened to catch me on a day when all I'd planned to do was write fanfiction. I just finished reading the game story prologue (it was longer than expected!), so here's a review type post. If you're reading this post not having seen a single thing about this game: it's a story-based joseimuke gacha mobile game that just released globally today. It's about a girl who suddenly finds herself attending a magic school and mingling with elite, superhuman students known as ghouls. If you look in the tumblr tag for the game you'll see what appears to be a completely different game from 2019 or so: they retooled it completely midway through development, changing just about everything about it due to "escalating competition within the gaming industry."
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I'll talk about how this looks like a blatant twst clone at the end.
Starting with the positive: The story is charming. I enjoyed it thoroughly the entire time and am excited to read more. The mix between visual novel segments and motion comics was really nice--it broke things up and added a lot of oomph to the action or atmospheric scenes that visual novels generally lack. I like the art in the comic parts a lot. the live2d in the visual novel parts is... passable. Tone-wise, I think the story was a little bit all over the place and would like to see more of the horror that it opened on, but I didn't mind the comedic direction it went in either. The translation is completely seamless. The characters so far all have unique voices and are just super fun and cute. Of the ones who've had larger roles in the story so far, there's not a single one I dislike. It's all fully voiced in Japanese and the acting is solid. (I don't recognize any voices, and can't seem to find any seiyuu credits, so it seems they're not big names, but they deliver nonetheless.) Kaito in particular I found I was laughing at his lines a ton, both the voicing and the writing.
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He's looking for a girlfriend btw. Spreading the word.
The problem is like. The gameplay is the worst dark-pattern microtransaction-riddled bullshit I've ever seen. Hundred passive timers going at all times. Fifty different item-currencies. Trying to get you to spend absurd amounts of real world money at every turn. There's like five different indicators that take you to various real-money shop items that I don't know how to dismiss the indicator, I guess you just have to spend money, wtaf. Bajillion different interlocking systems mean you have zero sense of relative value of all the different item-currencies. I did over the course of the day get enough diamonds for one ten-pull, which I haven't used yet. Buying enough diamonds for a ten-pull costs a bit under $60 (presumably USD, but there's a chance the interface is automatically making that CAD for me--not gonna spend the money to check lmfao), with an SSR rate of 1%. BULLSHIIIIIT.
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There's like a goddamn thousand-word essay explaining the dozen different types of character upgrades and equippables and equippables for the equippables!! Bad! Bad game design! That's just overcomplicating bullshit to trick people into thinking they're doing something other than clicking button to make number go up! That is not gameplay!
In terms of the actual gameplay, there is none. The battle system is full auto. There might be teambuilding, but from what I've seen so far, most of that consists of hoping you pull good cards from gacha and then clicking button to make number go up. There's occasional rhythm segments but there's no original music, it's just remixes of public domain classical music lmao. I'd describe the rhythm gameplay as "at least more engaging than twisted wonderland's," which is not a high bar
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At least there's a cat in the rhythm bit.
And like, ok, I gotta remark on how derivative it is. Like I mentioned in my post earlier, this game is unabashedly aping twisted wonderland's setting and aesthetic. (That said, most of the stuff it steals from twst is magic school stuff that twst also basically stole from Harry Potter, so...?) However, it isn't exactly like twst: in this one, the characters say fuck a lot and bleed all over the place and do violence. Basically, the tone is a fair bit more adult than twst's kid-friendly vibe. (Not, like, adult adult, and I probably wouldn't even call it dark--it's still rated Teen lol. Just more adult than twst.)
Rather than just being students at magic school, the ghouls also go out into the mundane world to go on missions where they fight and investigate monsters and cryptids. Honestly, the magic school setting feels pretty tacked-on. The things that are enjoyable about this would've been just as enjoyable in about any other setting--you can tell this whole aspect was a late trend-chasing addition, lmao. So, yeah, it's blatantly copying twst to try to steal some players, but... Eh, I found myself not caring that much. Someone more (or less) into twst than me may find it grating.
Character-wise, eh, sure, yeah, they're a bit derivative in that aspect too, but it's a joseimuke game, the characters are always derivative. Thus far the writing & execution has been solid enough that I didn't care if they were tropey. If I were to compare it to something else, I'd say the relationship between the protagonist and the ghouls feels more like that of the sage and wizards in mahoyaku than anything from twst. There's some mystery in exactly what "ghouls" are and their place in this world that has me intrigued and wanting to know more about this setting and how each of the characters feels about it. I have a bad habit of getting my hopes up for stories that put big ideas on the table and then being disappointed when they don't follow through in a way that lives up to my expectations, though.
So, my final verdict: I kind of just hope someone uploads all the story segments right onto youtube so nobody has to deal with the dogshit predatory game to get the genuinely decent story lol. Give it a play just for the story if you have faith in your ability to resist dark patterns. Avoid at all costs if you know you're vulnerable to gacha, microtransactions, or timesinks.
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wonderlandwalker · 10 months ago
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One Day at a Time | Finnick Odair x Reader
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Previous Part / THG Masterlist / Inbox
Summary: a short collection of sweet moments shared between you and Finnick as you recover, reminding the both of you of the love you share
(part 4 of the remember series but could also be read on its own I think, you can find the other parts in my masterlist)
Content Warnings / Tags: Fluff, no use of y/n, mentions of punching, I really think that's it.
Word Count: 1.6k
A/N: It's finally here! Sorry it took so long my only excuse is that I am an absolute mess of a human being which is a terrible one but oh well. This will be the final part of the series, hope the fluff makes up for all the heartbreak I've put you through <3
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It's been a week now, one week of blissful moments spend with Finnick while recovering from the attack within district 13. After all that had happened you were in need of some peace, and the universe granted it.
On the first day you were still in the hospital wing, an IV dripping steady fluids into your system. You woke up to Finnick sitting next to you, one of his hands holding onto yours while the other was holding up a book. It was one of your favourites, and you had been pestering him about reading it so you could talk about it with him, but he had always brushed you off, saying he'd get around to it eventually. It seems eventually finally came around. You coaxed him into getting in the bed with you, he was hesitant at first, not wanting to hurt you, but he wasn't above your charms either, your eyes pleading with him in a way he couldn't resist. He had settled in behind you, letting you lean against him, ignoring the dirty look the nurse gave you. You had asked him to read to you, and even though you already knew it by heart, his sweet voice added a whole new element to the story so beloved.
The second day was spent trying to convince the nurse to let you leave the hospital room, if only for a few hours, she didn't initially want to agree, but Finnick simply wouldn't drop the subject. So you walked together towards the dinner hall, feeling like little children sneaking out past the curfew.
Supper had already finished, but Finnick was friends with one of the cooks who let him into the kitchens. He told you to sit down on the table in the middle of the room and gave you a quick peck on the lips before moving over to the fridge. It was simple, it wasn't much, but it was perfect. He would let you taste the dish in-between steps, always forgetting one ingredient or another, but you didn't mind reminding him. At some point you could have sworn he was doing it on purpose, but maybe he was just too caught up in having you there with him again. You offered to help with meting the butter, dicing the vegetables, stirring the sauce, but each and every time he would insist you stayed right where you were, accentuated with a quick kiss, his hands on your face smearing flour all over your jaw, not that you minded. He claimed he was the better cook anyway, that you'd only hold him back, now that one you both knew was a lie, but it was a precious one, one that didn't need to be disturbed.
Day three consisted of a slow day back in your room, having been cleared by the doctor and finally being in your own space again. You and Finnick hadn't shared a room in a while now with everything that had gone down, but you had immediately decided to spend your nights together again, not wanting to spend more time apart than necessary. You hadn't fully recovered yet, still needing your rest, but Finnick had set his mind on moving your things back into his room today.
So there you were, sitting crossed legged on his bed absentmindedly sipping on some coffee he had brought you as you watched him bustle about. He was only gone a few minutes at a time, but you never failed to produce a smile when you saw him approaching again, hands full with some of your books, the collection of flowers he had given you over the years that you had dried and pressed in-between the pages were sticking out slightly, but he handled them with care. Even while you weren't together you couldn't find it ins yourself to get rid of them, and you're glad of it now. He goes back and forth for a while, collecting your pillow, your skin care products, your small radio that barely managed to get a reception down here, but you couldn't bare to part with. Each time he'd ask you where you wanted him to put it down, carefully creating a space that consisted of the both of you.
On day four you had finally woken up in his arms again, wondering how you could have ever forgotten this feeling. When he noticed you were awake he had moved to place a delicate kiss on your lips, basking in the simplicity of the fact that he could. He had told you he had a surprise for you today, and you couldn't help how giddy you already got from the mere thought of what it could be. But it was oh so much better than you could have imagined, because today Finnick took you to the surface. How he managed to get you past all the checkpoints was beyond you, and when you asked he had simply said he had friends in all the right places.
It was a bit of a walk to the spot he wanted to take you, but you revelled in the sunlight against your face, needing to squint your eyes to see properly with how bright the sun was but too blissed to care. The high grass rustled against your bare legs as you continued to walk, and the tickling sensation brought back so many fond memories. When you finally made it to the clearing it was a sight from a dream. The tree next to the lake provided a shadow you could both comfortably lay in as the smell of the fresh water blessed your senses once more. The wildflowers adorning the space around you were once you could recall from back home, with a few others you couldn't identify. Finnick had picked a few, placing them behind your ear as he talked about what the flower meant. A myosotis, he had called it, representing true love and dedication. He told you about the myth behind the forget-me-nots, how they had been afraid of being forgotten by the gods, and you had vowed in return to never spend a day without thinking of him again.
During the fifth day you didn't do much of anything special, but you supposed that depends on your definition of the word. Finnick had made dandelion tea from flowers he had collected yesterday, the familiar taste bringing back a sense of nostalgia for a time that you wouldn't be able to return to. You had once told him your mother used to make it when you were sick, and ever since he would go collect them by the cliffs for you. You had insisted it was too much work that he didn't need to worry himself with, he had countered that he enjoyed the view where they grew anyway, and really, he was going for himself as much as for you. Maybe he had simply been trying to get you to stop fussing over the subject, maybe it had really been true.
You spend the day talking to your friends, reminiscing in regained memories and filling in gaps that you couldn't on your own. As you sat next to Johanna she talked on about the days Finnick spent longing after you, claiming he was alright wirh being just friends, but she was convinced that if any of her friends looked at her the way he looked at you she would have suckerpunched them.
On the sixth day you had begged Finnick train with you, saying how you wanted to get your strength back, how you missed the exercise and the content feeling of aching muscles. He had been reluctant, of course he had been, but once you had managed to drag him onto the training mat he revelled in it. He couldn't deny he had missed sparring with you, the action so effortless with you. He had made fun of how you threw your punches, saying you had to extent your arms further to complete the motion, but he was the one not protection his core properly while fixating on you. It had been good to feel your body in motion again, he was still stronger than you, knocking the breath out of your lungs once be stopped holding back, but you were still faster, getting the drop on him in the split seconds he was distracted. The manner in which your muscle memory still held up, the way in which you still used the same techniques without meaning to, it was good to know there are some things people can't take from you.
The seventh day you picked your routine back up. Waking up to an empty bed but not lonely, his side was still warm as you rolled over. Once you opened your eyes you saw the cup of coffee and the note on the bedside table. Finnick knew you never slept for long after he left, somehow he still knew. He had been given some time off during your recovery, but district 13 didn't stand still and they had needed his help. You weren't expected back yet, but the sense of purpose was one that you were always glad to have. You drank the coffee he left you as you got dressed, smiling as he had made it exactly to your liking, even if he used to complain you couldn't even call it coffee anymore with that much sugar in it. And so you went back to work, moving to scribble a quick message on the back of the note if he came back looking for you, not that he needed it, somehow he would always know where you were.
In the past week you had learned that a love as great as the one you shared with Finnick could never be forgotten, not really, because no matter how many memories faded, there would always come new ones. And soon, even though you didn't know it yet, Finnick would give you his mother's ring once more, and this time you would remember everything that led you here, and you would remember saying yes.
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katsutora · 2 years ago
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— DIAL
ft. isagi yoichi ; itoshi rin ; nagi seishiro ; bachira meguru ; itoshi sae
summary: call routine with them
note: i’ve seen some shit bro. being on this hell-site changes you fr. tag system is an absolute bullshit too. i can’t link jackshit. wow too many “shit” mentioned. shit.
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⚘ ISAGI YOICHI
ㅤ���calls you at a sensible hour if you haven’t agreed on a specific time. he knows your schedule by heart so don’t worry because he won’t bother you in the middle of work, etc. if you do have a call schedule, then he’ll make sure to call at exactly that time. can be very punctual about this and will start seeing everyone as bowling pins once he realizes he’s gonna be a minute late. they don’t call him a STRIKEr for nothing. will listen and rant equally! he always has interesting stories; wbk being in a call with isagi is never boring. also expect his teammates popping up in the background because of course they want to bonk him in the head after running them over know the person who can temporarily turn him into chigiri. ah yes, the furious yelling ambient noise, a classic. “isagi yoichi istg—” “get your ass back in here wtf was that about?!” “you have a competition, princess.” “EVERYONE STFU!!!” never fails to make you giggle. bonus: screenshots you laughing because he adores you sm <3
⚘ ITOSHI RIN
ㅤㅤhe has a routine and you’re in it: three times a day; square meal style. his early calls are short and mostly consist of “good morning”, “have you had breakfast yet”, and “take care”; (borrowing his word) lukewarm shit like that. i love you. even though he usually prefaces his afternoon/evening calls with “i pressed it on accident” (back to back for months straight? yea sure), it’s clearly an excuse because he just wants to hear your voice but his pride isn’t letting him. i love you. it has also recently been brought up to his attention that he can’t seem to sleep peacefully without hearing your voice first. so tell him something, anything, or don’t. he’ll settle with just the comfortable silence after a “hello”. it’s also the only time of the day he’ll say it loud and clear: “i love you”.
⚘ NAGI SEISHIRO
ㅤㅤwhat’s a timezone? it can be in the middle of the day after practice or he can randomly hit you up at 2am after losing yet another round of game. acts out of impulse: when he misses you that’s when he calls you. it’s mostly video calls too! props up his phone so you can see choki his beloved but gets so pouty when you open up the conversation with “how’s choki?” before he can even show you the cactus lmao. “y’re supposed to be asking about me ( ´•︵•` )” he loooves long calls too (re: letting you watch him play without him saying a word whatsoever and no he did not lose track of time + the game after dedicating his next win to you?). is absolutely against ending it unless you really need to go. rip your phone battery.
⚘ BACHIRA MEGURU
ㅤㅤyou’re like an emergency call button but for whenever there’s something crazy going on. his living diary. a breathing, talking, and confused log entry. that being said, he contacts you at least once a day without a fail. well, that’s actually an understatement because he keeps calling then hanging up after telling you one (1) sentence?? “chigiri just ran me over; ok bye!” “my mom painted something inspired by you; later!” “rin-chan just said we’re all lukewarm, boo— ow, ouch!” gotta rely on his teammates to inform you about his well-being because calling him back is no use. “meguru?” “[unintelligible] [intense fighting ensues]” it’s fine, he makes up for it by showing up at your door later in the day. you think it’ll be funny if you close the door as soon as he finishes a sentence? “hi!!” [door closing] “h-wha- you won’t believe what happened today—” [door closing #2] “?? ok so it wasn’t chigiri who ran me over but isag—” imagine doing this after every sentence to teach him a lesson lmfao.
⚘ ITOSHI SAE
ㅤㅤhonestly? in the middle of a fucking interview because man is so unhinged i tell you. “so sae, are you ready for the next match?” ugh, this is so boring. “wait let me ask my s/o.” ??? this is broadcasted live, btw. you think just because he has a tight schedule and it’s nearly impossible to have a free time he won’t call you? he’ll find a way, he always does. likes to call you at the end of the day too and will never lose to the “who can stay awake the longest” game. is more of a listener than a talker, so go ahead and talk his ears off. he doesn’t mind if it’s you + he loves being the last one to end the call, making sure you get some rest (ps: he’s counting on you to wake him up the next day). you’ll receive a call from his manager in the morning saying that he won’t answer his phone and that they’re gonna be late for the next event. “goddamnit sae, not again.”
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© 2023 katsutora ; do not repost and/or translate and/or claim my works
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sysmedsaresexist · 2 months ago
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To the anon asking about my username...
There's a bit of confusion here, I'm going to answer many of your questions but I may not post the ask itself, hopefully it'll make sense :)
When I started my blog I was heavily anti endo and I specifically posted bad pro/endo takes, debunking or just laughing. To this day, most of it is still pretty hilarious. I wasn't focused on cringe, but totally crazy, out there claims that made zero sense and were flat out wrong. Check out my tags #shit endos say, #shit singlets say, and my newest tag, #shit anti endos say, I hope you have a laugh at a couple of them.
In my pinned post, you'll see the thing that started it all. A pro endo saying that sysmeds are sexist.
I would also like to know how they came to that conclusion. I'm right there with you. Also like you, I still have many issues with the pro/endo community. I believe CDDs are trauma based disorders. I post research pretty much weekly about it (check out #debunk and #research). I think endogenic plurality and CDDs are completely different things.
And you know what, my pro endo friends support me. We're all learning. I'm kind with my opinion, I'm open to talking about it, we debate, we share resources, we change our views and adjust based on new info.
This blog corrects misinformation from both sides, now. Some of it is worse than others. Antis can and do spread just as much misinformation as pro/endos.
What I would encourage you to do is start with the multiple selves theory. It actually developed right alongside Freud's theories on hysteria (which included early versions of CDDs at the time), and if Freud hadn't been such a perv, it might actually be much more well-known. It's a nonpathological theory on consciousness and philosophy. People have been describing this phenomenon for a very long time, "endogenic" is just the newest term for it. Here's a couple examples.
2015 - at any given moment in time, one or another of our subselves is in control and determines how we think and act.
1987
2012 - this one has so many links to other people talking about this theory
2023 - These results suggest that the normative principles by which agents have adapted to complex changing environments may also explain why humans have long been described as consisting of “multiple selves.”
2020
2010
Like I said, though, you can find this stuff as far back as the 50s with ease, anything older might take a bit more digging, but it's not a small or new theory.
I think an overlap in language has created a lot of confusion, but it's really not out of the realm of possibility for people to be more in tune with these parts of themselves. It's been documented for over a century outside of psychology, in other areas of research-- anthropology, philosophy.
I'm going to be honest, I don't think a single one of the headmate sale blogs are real. I think they're antis trying to start shit. Like maybe one out of every ten is actually someone misguided behind the screen.
Even CDD systems still incorrectly believe in core theory, endogenics picked it up from us and don't know any better. System resets aren't real, but there are real experiences that can FEEL like a reset-- try being patient and educating people. Ignore the others, because some people just can't be helped, and you're better off spending your time spreading good, accurate posts than arguing with people who don't want to learn anything.
I forget what I was saying.
Anyways, I'm a pro endo sysmed.
I hope you'll stick around and see what's going on.
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