#offendability

[mentalisttraceur]

As I grow and heal, I catch more cloudbreaks of not needing to get angry because I'm safe now (the bad thing can't happen to me), or I'm feeling unshakably powerful (I can stop the bad thing once it happens or handle everything it does to me), or seeing far and wide enough (it's not really all bad, or it's actually good).

Working to develop a healthy relationship with my anger has also shown great promise for ability to be more gentle or measured with my anger. Because:

Anger expression doesn't have to always be either held back or a five-second explosive surgery that decisively changes the doer of shitty behavior to do it less. In childhood, under a certain pattern of abuse, fear, stress, and trauma, I had to sharpen and compress but also curb my anger, until that's basically what it always had to be. I could only safely release anger when it would do something effective in the time window I had before it was punished.

Anger expression doesn't have to be saved for the worst transgressions. In my late teens I ended up in a relationship with someone very easily and strongly hurt by me being angry at them. I had more compassion for their hurt than my wants and needs I guess. That's a funny error of empathy - a more hurtable person always "wins", a sufficiently resilient empath only ever gives. So I got very good at both finding ways to not be angry and to not express anger for minor stuff.

As I heal these two things, I am starting to see a view where anger is a normal active part of the toolkit, not a vicious snarling dog only released in extreme situations or when tired, but something always ready to fade in and out fluidly. Anger is interpersonal hardening which you can use to shore up your resolve and tolerance as-needed. Our boundaries, offendabilities, and even just perception of contradiction to our goals and preferences, can define healthy automatic activations of anger and how intense or soft they will be.

Growing a self-worth core tied into this. That axiomatic feeling that I deserve good things. Specifically, that I deserve a certain standard of treatment from others more than they deserve me proactively tolerating worse to spare them bad feelings or outcomes. Without a self-worth core, empathy prevented me from getting/acting mad at people unless I felt their intentions/motives/thinking were sufficiently bad/unacceptable. With a self-worth core, the other person can be well-meaning, understandable, or even just good and right, and yet I can still deserve better from them or from the situation.

A healthy self-worth with healthy internal anger freedom naturally dials up anger to defend and assert yourself in line with your wants, and it doesn't need others to be unacceptably bad, which means the anger doesn't need to escalate to your-existence-as-you-are-is-a-problem levels just to get going, it doesn't need to be bundled with judgement, condemnation, and hard feelings, and it can relax once the behavior changes instead of needing the person to change.

[professor-pants]

Genre of character: submissive like a guard dog is submissive

[batfam-stuff-posts-0]

Tim: Want to play a game?

Jason: *war flashbacks to knife monopoly* ...okay...?

Tim: It's called 'Jon or katana'. I give you actual quotes from Damian, and you guess if he was talking to his sword or his boyfriend.

Jason:

Jason: Awesome.

[dudedidujust]

The daily planet runs a front page article calling superman the light of mankind

Cue the batfam launching a counter campaign in support of Signal,  the real Light of Mankind.

It starts as a joke but quickly derails into an all out war.

[yooo-lets-go]

what sort of music does simon listen to- and what are the others’ opinions on it when they inevitably discover it?

They probably wouldn’t share a playlist

Plus Roach:

[lesbianfiddleford]

[rinkudonuts]

Idk I just feel like this would happen

[ditzybat]

one of those tiktok gotham university reporters approaching bernard on the way to one of his bio classes: thoughts on red robin?

bernard, mildly sleep deprived, and knowing full well what tim’s night life is like: smash [proceeds to walk away like nothing happened]

[anxiousgaypenguin]

I feel like making one of those uquiz and picrew chains with these random ones I found sooo

Take this quiz and find out what instrument you are and thennnn

make a lil guy with this picrew :))))

(As a viola player I’m VERY offended. So offended, offended beyond belief. But hey kitty :)) )

@ilivebyshipping @glassesgirlies @lusxnei6

[asocketwrench]

it's all coming together

[tweetsongs]

apart from buck not behaving normally about his supposedly platonic bff moving away it is also very funny that their 'fight' also consisted of buck being like 'well you know i don't have to tell you every thought and decision that goes through my mind immediately,' a sentiment which is true for most people, and eddie taking it like a sword in the back.

[batfamilycannons]

Bruce *storming in, burnt and covered in ash*: Where is your brother?

Damian and Tim: tf??

Tim: uh I think Jason’s in the library?

Bruce: no not him the other one

Dick, *scurries past the door*

Bruce: RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON why did you set my bed on fire

Dick: You deserve it!!

[cryptvokeeper]

I don’t go here f1 tumblr did I get this race right

[comicake]

glad to see that a lot of people were disappointed by the fact that Niko’s colourful lights were not her lesbian vibes but just some parasites

[queerprayers]

i don't know what gay draping themselves sensually while bleeding out needs to hear this but st sebastian survived the arrows. let yourself be tended to and let the holes scar over. we have work to do. you need to harangue every empire in your path, to prophesy to your archers. you must become irene and nurse others bleeding back to health. yes spoiler alert we'll all be beaten to death if we keep it up but so it goes. we've never claimed to have a practical religion, just one that looks good suffering in paintings and then comes back to life. the second bit is longer and harder than the first. may as well start today

[iamlostandinneedofcoffee]

I like to imagine that every once in a while Red Hood just goes off comms for long stretches of time and comes back bruised as shit and exhausted before logging off for the night and the rest of bat brigade is trying to figure out which villain of the week keeps jumping him.

Eventually they, cause communication is a skill no one learned, just start harassing hood’s men to find out whose turf they are invading only to find out they thought the bats were beefing with Red again cause he keeps mumbling about brats.

Now they are trying to find out which one of them is lying about fucking with Jason and no one is owning up, the trackers they keep putting on him are fizzling out, no one as any idea and Jason ain’t saying shit. But like he’s never properly irritated about it or asks for help nor can they find anything out so they let it go for now (read keep trying to track him to no avail).

And then one night Red Robin comes across Red getting chased and then fighting off a feral looking teenager on the roofs of Crime Alley and just when he looks like he is getting the upper hand another drops down from above (how the fuck the nearest taller building is not anywhere near close enough to dive into the fight from what the fuck?!?) and joins the brawl.

Tim is about to rush in to help Jason before the two teens’ heads turn in unison to him with Lazarus green eyes and look like cats when they see a red dot. Jason panics and before he can grab them, they leap and now Tim is in a cartoon brawl dust cloud and all and Jason has joined in and is calling them all brats and how his gunna whop their ass- and there is a foot in his mouth.

And yet through it all Tim never feels afraid. In fact, as he fights he realises they are keeping up and beating him all whilst smiling and punning(?!? They must never meet dick SHIT DUCK) and that won’t fucking do, so he brings out all his tools and tricks and is getting matching by two raccoon twins. 20 minutes later they are all grinning bloody smiles and just as he is about to slam his bo staff up into into the female looking twin, a whistle is blown.

They all freeze and look over in unison as if they all became shining quadruplets at a giant shit house built fucking man. And like Tim has seen big men. Bane is a big mother fucker. Superman is a big mother fucker, and is also shaped like one. Bats is big but this guy even though his is maybe not as large he feels infinitely more terrifying and that’s before you get to the flaming(fucking literally, how does that even work or stay in the pony tail) white hair.

“Alright enough for tonight or foods gunna go cold. Inside.” A voice bellows across the roof before the man disappears??!? At the mention of food the one top of Tim almost starts drooling, gets up and starts dragging Tim’s still prone body across the roof and off of it OH FUCK AND INTO A WALL WHA and they went through it… well

A couple second later Jason and the other dude stumble in. Jason picks Tim up as he is coming down from that mini adrenaline rush at and puts a arm around Tim, half hug half chokehold, saying “say nothing and you get to join once a week. Say shit and you’re haunted.” And walks off to the kitchen and starts bringing out food.

… safe to say the rest of the bats are now confused why Tim of all people is now turning up bruised as well with Jason, cause if it was him to start why has he started loosing all of a sudden??? And he says fuck all but his weapons and fighting style has got more chaotic and terrifying.

Oh and he seems to be eating… well you win some and lose some