#obviously I don’t really but STILL!!!!
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ough :-( realizing I may have to ship another box cause I underestimated just how much art stuff and clothes I still have left waa </3
#I hate being attached to my items waaa waaaa#but I’ll die without my silly little pens and stickers okay I need themmmm#obviously I don’t really but STILL!!!!#also everuone got me like going away gifts and housewarming stuff even when I begged them not to#so now I gotta figure out how I’m gonna take all of it without breaking anything so :-(#well </3 as long as I don’t spend another 250$ I should be fine… and it should only cost 100 to ship another big box ough#moving hard#it’s gonna be soooo worth it but my brain hurt from all the real life Tetris of trying to maxamize my space and organizing#waa#callate guero#everyone wish me luck please <33
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potentially hot take but this is a pet peeve of mine
#listen. anyone can write whatever they want and idc I don’t have to engage with it. all power to them!!!!#it’s not even an automatic click-off for me or anything#i just… why. I don’t get it#like… that’s literally one of THE most iconic traits of the entire character. of the entire concept of the SHOW even#and you’re just gonna??? get rid of it??? hello????? the entire basis that John and Arthur’s relationship is made from????????#really????????? possibly the most tender part of their relationship???????#you don’t wanna write fluff about John reading him books and describing things and guiding him????? really?????????#it’s just so boring to me. I don’t understand the appeal#like yeah obviously Arthur as himself would definitely prefer to get his sight back#but as a concept like….#something ab the whole ‘happy ending = the disabled character gets ‘fixed’’ thing just leaves a bad taste in my mouth#why do u have to fix them. why cant they just be disabled. do you think people can’t be happy and be disabled???#idk maybe it’s not that deep. and still I don’t really care that much#it’s just the vibes. I don’t vibe with it.#and I’m sure there’s some actual annoying as hell discourse in the fandom ab it which I have zero interest in engaging in#but I had to have my little petty bitch moment#bc blind Arthur is everything to me. ESPECIALLY in a jarthur context.#anyways thank u for coming to my Ted talk#malevolent#arthur lester#if anyone wants me to tag this as smth Iemme know
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but also like. guys you don’t need to leave the minecraft youtube community bc one person is bad to clarify. like. shelby is a minecraft youtuber. a lot of her friends are minecraft youtubers. those friends are supportive and as far as we know all believe her. the vast majority of minecraft youtubers are like. fine. this shit is something that Happens because Abusers are Manipulative, going to another hobby will Not shield you from anything and you’re not immoral for liking something bad people also liked. which is. one of the biggest video games ever. like in this situation no one was knowingly harbouring an abuser and it seems everyone was supportive. this is just a case of some people being shit, not anything to do with mcyt. hell, the guy hasn’t been on minecraft in like a year lmao.
i fully understand why the content might be uncomfortable to you guys now but like, please don’t self flagellate and cut yourself off from an entire genre of media because of one guy again. i saw that happen after the dream stuff and a lot of people ended up losing important things because they made rash decisions and felt like they Had to leave. but please. take one deep fucking breath. this has happened before. this has happened so much before, and in ways far worse than this. because abusers, unfortunately, exist. you should not feel guilty for being manipulated by a manipulative abuser, don’t blame yourself. do what you have to, but please, please keep in mind that the majority of minecraft youtube is fine. it is fine to continue engaging with it. it’s fine to be manipulated by an abuser and it’s not your fault. please don’t make rash decisions and end up losing things you care deeply about and being unable to get them back. distance yourself all you want, but please be careful to not do so out of emotional self harm from the guilt. that’s something this fandom encourages far too much- even outside of this- and it’s unhealthy and anyone expecting it of you is cruel.
#mcyt#abuse tw#i guess this is discourse idk but like#this happened two years ago and the amount of people who realised cutting themselves off from All mcyt was self harm and came back#only to have lost a lot of content they created and valued because they wanted to punish themselves for trusting a predator#and like. you’re victim blaming yourself. obviously you are not anywhere near as much a victim as The victim#but being manipulated into supporting abusers is still something that is an action they take to harm others#Being used as a tool to silence others unknowingly is a cruel thing and can be traumatic to go through#its honestly really concerning as someone working on their own emotional self harm to see it. like this isn’t about anyone in specific but#guys. emotionally self harming isn’t helping. you don’t need punishment. breathe and think through things.
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Happy new years… let’s stay hydrated together ✨
#I didn’t end up going to the rave just stayed in with my buddies and had KFC (( Korean fried chicken )) and laughed til we cried so#it was still a wonderful start to the new year 💞🥰💞#but the fwb wanted pics of my potential rave look so I figured eh I brought the stuff anyways#and now I’m imagining locking eyes with a stranger on the warm and writhing dance floor#the beat thumps and shakes and rattles the air in our breath as the spotlights dance in the reflections of our held gaze#he pushes his way through the crowd with a singular stare and a wicked smile on his face#I smile and turn my back on him arching myself so he knows I am giving what he’s looking for#I take careful steps through the revelry toward the edge where the crowd thins out#I prop myself up on an available stool in a lonely corner of the club as he closes the distance between us#“now I wonder why you dragged me all the way here” he utters in a playful growl “trying to get far away from the crowd?”#I smile and I nod. “obviously. can’t really do what I want with you out there”#his eyes perk up and his smile gives away the desire building inside him. “yeah? why don’t you show me then.”#“I thought you’d never ask” I smirk. I reach down into my pants and pull out my phone#“so this one is blue. he’s the oldest but he’s sooooo sweet. and that’s Eva. my only girl she’s sassy but she loves swea-” he leaves#whaddahell I say demurely whimpering even… whaddahell…#gpoy
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if i had a nickel for every ship that i have which is shorter light brown hair/bookish/artistic/dad who left trauma boy times longer curly black hair/super smart but kinda dumb/internalized homophobia/dad who stayed trauma boy id have two nickels which isn't a lot but its weird that it happened twice right?
#genuinely i have to look really closely at half the fanart on my fyp so i don’t repost w the wrong tags#obviously the ships are different#but still#mike wheeler#will byers#byler#sirius black#remus lupin#wolfstar
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I don’t understand it when people say that Carrie was also the problem bc she was anxiously attached bc like …. maybe she had a moment or two but for the most part it was absolutely Big being such a selfish prick and then justifying it w “ohhh I have commitment issues bc my last marriage fell through” umm ur a 45 year old BABY actually
#and like at every turn Big was so awful to her and she would justify it w “I’m also the problem”#Girl no#like when he refused to show her in public for the longest time#Or when he literally dropped a bomb that he was going to Paris out of NOWHERE#Refusing to meet her friends#Talking to her on his schedule and his schedule only#Being like “I wanna do things at my own pace” okay but that’s not how a relationship comprising two ppl works#And then marrying a brown eyed brunette socialite#The antithesis of Carrie#Was a transparently bad Big moment in the show but still#The show treads around in circles w regards to how to view Big#Bc they obviously wanna paint him as an unhealthy avoidant and also downright selfish asshole#But they also wanna be like “he’s j too scared to give her the keys to his house bc of his other relationships”#Like he literally played her like a FIDDLE#only to have them end up together ????? I will never understand that ending#I think it’s such weak writing#In real life avoidant men who also don’t want u that much won’t end up w u I fear#I don’t really understand the narrative weighing Carrie w the responsibility of adjusting to Big’s “trauma” and fixing him#He did that for her maybe once in the show but even when he’s being affectionate to her it comes from#A selfish place#Like he wants her attention or wants sex or whatevs like it’s never bc he’s truly in love w Carrie
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That’s it I’m doing one of those posts that usually get people annoyed at me for my whimsy and silliness
Every note this gets I will clean my room for an extra minute
#/nf obviously#I Need the motivation#I wanna see my friends on Thursday and I don’t think Father Dearest will let me if it’s still a mess in here#if it gets 0 I’ll still like. sweep things to the side#my room really isn’t that dirty I just keep dropping my stuffed animals on the floor#I cannot mop
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The bear creatüre has a bachelor degree now
Yea I graduated uni today 🐻❄️🎓🎉
Feels weird tbh 💥
My brain did not register this information yet
Diploma comic reveal when? 👀
#watch me ramble in the tags like a silly billy 🐻❄️👓#bachelors degree#graduation#degree#diploma#it’s actually called bachelor’s degree but literally everyone I know calls it diploma lmao#legit need to get used to the fact I’m a graduate#what do you mean I’m actually a graphic designer now *what do you mean*#I am a silly student forever#*picks up a pen* *it explodes*#🐻❄️✏️💥#I’m still yet to receive an actual document tho#but today was a final presentation and grading#I don’t have a cool photo with a silly paper yet ���#also today was really stressful and cringe lmao💥#🐻❄️☝️clarification I was cringe#I dunno nervousness screws u over okay 💥💥#there were a moment where the professors had to ask you mandatory questions about the project#and the lady asked ‘’what inspired you to create this comic? 🌸’’#my goofy ass answered ‘’stress’’#I MEAN IT IS TRUE#BUT LIKE💥#I could’ve answered something more poetic or something 😭#yea but I’m really glad that it’s finally over#the preparation for the final presentation I mean#(the stress™️ is never over obviously#but at least the main event is)
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I wish more people were normal about POC, and specifically black, characters in the MCYT fandom. I mean, for obvious reasons related to CCs and all that, but also bc I often feel like I’m doing something wrong because sometimes I’m one of the only people I know how is getting like? Stimming flappy arms excited about my favourite black characters? It’s not like I’m singling them out either I get the exact same way about my favourite non black characters?
It’s jarring to get into skyjacks and see almost equal amounts of art of Jonnit as everyone else because I’ve been in this weirdly passively racist fandom for so long. People are so weird about like CANON (silly canon but) biggri and they make them weirdly toxic when they were so sweet. If it was Scar and Grian you people would be all over it. And dude fucking whatever happened to the way people drew Ponk. And, it’s not even just black ccs and characters. Don’t get me started on the way a lot of Dteam fans back in the day (and still some qsmp fans) talk about Asian women like Tina.
#obv if you’re black your input is more important than mine#this is just important to me because a lot of my favourite characters and CCs are black and this fandom treats them like crap#and obviously??? because black people matter generally??? even if I wasn’t really into their content I still would be upset#I don’t watch tina! I don’t watch p0nk anymore! I can still feel angry about this!#and you should be too#sorry including Tina in there makes this flow weird she’s Asian oops#sorry I am. so tired
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Not to start drama because I know everyone thinks she's the "good one" out of the foxes, but I swear "Renee" is from my hometown and she was kind of known for hanging around with the wrongs types of people if you catch my drift. Renee isn't her real name and it's a widely known rumor that she actually killed a guy a long time ago. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I've never seen anyone talking about it soo.....
.
#anon are we about to have beef?#like obviously she has issues#she’s still a fox#and listen i don’t believe in putting any of the players on a pedestal#but like a huge point of the foxes is that they’re all being given a second chance#andrew fucking minyard is on the team#and of course there’s all that shit with aaron minyard recently#i’m not really concerned about someone who maybe killed a man in the past#idk it just she seems like she’s trying#if i’m not faulting the other foxes for their pasts im not abt to dogpile on her#also she changed her name? big whoop#sorry guys revealing myself as a foxes fan#aftg#exy confessions#all for the game#renee walker
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Ok time for my big Hadestown hot take and that’s that West End Hadestown doesn’t give you a 100% Hadestown experience. It’s still ridiculously good and 100% worth seeing, don’t get me wrong (I used my opportunity and saw it twice and will likely see it again if I’m in London), but it kinda made me realise a couple of things about OBC production that will always be my Roman Empire and make me deeply upset Broadway is too greedy to give us an OBC proshot.
So, here are some of my thoughts and reflections based on seeing Hadestown live on West End + seeing different versions (including London National theatre proshot) in boots. I think you can pretty solidly say that in Hadestown there are 2 main stories: Orpheus/Eurydice and Hades/Persephone. And even though arguably Orphedice is the main most important story, it my opinion it also wins from Hadesphone story being strong. Which works perfectly in OBC due to Amber Gray and Patrick Page delivering a very deep nuanced performances as their characters.
I think part of the success of Hadestown when it works on its fullest is how it creates a very deep emotional journey. And I feel that regardless which pair of Orpheus and Eurydice you have (if we take Broadway/tour/West End take on the characters) it’ll still work! Like you need to try really hard to mess up orphedice the way people wouldn’t root for Orpheus or wouldn’t empathise with Eurydice because they are so relatable and cute. You instantly love them, they are so so lovable. So orphedice part is one thing in Hadestown that imo works if not always then in 99% of the cases.
Hades and Persephone’s part of the story in the contrary is VERY hard to nail on 100%, in my opinion, and this is literally driving me crazy. Maybe seeing Amber Gray and Patrick page in professional recording awoken some feelings in me, I don’t know. I will state straight away that I also do enjoy other actors’ takes on characters and I do see some very interesting character moments there and there. However, I keep returning to the thought that Amber/Patrick’s characterisation works SO WELL for the main narrative. I’ll try to explain why I think so. Consider it my love letter to the OBC.
First and foremost, I feel like Hadesphone story has a very fine dynamic that the actors have to nail, so you would feel that: 1) these two still love each other; 2) these two are buried under their problems and see no way out, only a miracle (aka Orpheus and his song) can save their marriage.
And if the first one usually works at least due to Epic 3, the second one, imo, often (at least partially) falls victim to acting/directing choices which can cause troubles with point 1 as well. I think one big thing I’ve noticed is that often Persephone’s alcoholism gets forgotten in the acting performance. Like yeah sure her choreography includes drinking from a flask but in comparison to Amber you never get a feeling that she is absolutely wasted. Which, is in my opinion something that you should feel when you’re watching the show and something I was constantly forgetting about when I was watching the show on West End. I feel in Amber’s performance you can constantly see that her Persephone’s feel good attitude is a façade of a broken person who knows that her marriage is going to hell in front of her eyes yet she is too passive and hopeless to try to make an active change (well, she does try in Chant and nothing happens), so her only way is to chase the sense of normality that the “medicine” gives her. But when she is alone, if you get to catch a moment when people are not looking at her, you can see a deep sadness under her positive front and her memory of the old days when everything was more simple. Nevertheless, the main point that the lyrics literally say is that Persephone is blinded by the river of wine. And this is crucial to her character and her relationship with Hades because the story states that even though Hades is a problem and he is an active actor in creating more problems, he is not the only failure in this relationship. Persephone needs to be woken up from her apathy almost as much as Hades does and this is something that we see during If It’s True.
From Hades’ side I feel like it’s not a good decision to make him a total villain because when he is irredeemable you don’t feel like the whole “song that will fix the world” has any chance of working long term. I think Patrick nailed a deep antagonist very well. His Hades is weird and lowkey creepy and alien. He does objectively bad things but when you look at him you can’t stop thinking that he doesn’t operate in regular human logic or morality. When I look at him in Chant, it feels to me that his words about building stuff to impress Persephone are absolutely sincere, and I can absolutely see that his Hades doesn’t understand why she is so upset about it when his intentions are so so clear. Maybe it’s my vision but even before Epic 3 when he is so far gone and buried in his projects and messed up ideas I don’t have a single doubt that Persephone is a single motivator and goal of Patrick Hades’ life and that he literally doesn’t need any other being to care about. And tragically this fixation is what makes him blind to all other things he does even if those things ruin Persephone’s life (and other people’s but tbh I don’t think he cares).
I feel like by removing Persephone’s Chant 2 verse Hadestown created more problems for Hades and Persephone part of the story making it a much harder job for the actors to prove to the audience that Hades and Persephone have a chance to make their relationship work. Like I get that maybe it was a necessary things to do (even though I think the show is much better with it) but it made it so much harder to empathise with this particular part of the story unless the actors use the choices that work in the narrative. Because for example when I was watching the show on West End part of me was wondering “what is Persephone’s deal in all of that, what does she win by staying with Hades?” With the verse, and with Broadway Previews or London 2018 in particular this part was clear: Persephone still loves Hades and believes that he has the opportunity to change and become a better man he used to be. Without the verse, however, the actors should give you the same idea during the show which is a hard task considering Hades and Persephone have only 2 big conversations together (Chant and How Long). So apart from those songs there are only subtle mostly silent moments they get together through which the actors have to convey the same thought which is hella difficult and probably hardly will be appreciated by anyone apart from the people who sit closely.
So, maybe because in the actor combo I saw (Zachary and Lauren), I got a feeling that even though they were great separately, I didn’t feel much chemistry between them as a pair. I think, Persephone seemed pissed and tired of Hades all the time until How Long and I didn’t feel that she still believes in his willingness to change. And Zach Hades despite being entertaining, kinda gives the impression of Hades who has other options, he is not into Persephone enough. The only sparkle appears between the two in Epic III which is still cute but I’m not sure if it works just as well if that’s the first time you see the show? Also considering Zach Hades gives more malicious intent in His Kiss, The Riot it seems that he is not even slightly interested in Orpheus having any opportunity to succeed with his quest. Which is not bad, don’t get me wrong! But in comparison to Patrick who is deeply self projecting into Orpheus to the point where you could see that even though he doesn’t want to let him go, part of him does because it would prove he too could succeed in his challenge of waiting for Persephone, this take seems a bit lacking. And overall because of His Kiss, their promise in Wait For Me doesn’t seem as giving much hope that the story won’t repeat itself next Sunday. Which in its turn makes Orpheus’ sacrifice feel a bit… worthless. If on Broadway, when Orpheus turns, but spring comes again you feel like it is the start of something new: hopefully a kinder and softer time. On West End the show also wants you to feel it but when you think about Hades and Persephone you feel…less certainty that this sacrifice will have a long term effect?
I guess the creators wanted to concentrate on Orpheus and Eurydice more and forget about Hades and Persephone by making them more secondary story or maybe there was a lack of director’s involvement to give the cast some hints on how to make this particular part of the story work better, but it feels to me that in its current state the show works in its 85% power which is still great but once you know there is something missing you can’t stop thinking about it and wishing the show would give you those 15% you crave.
#me being me#hadestown#thanks for coming to my ted talk#I still immensely enjoyed the production and would come see it again#but when you know the show at its fullest you seem to miss some parts that worked better#also I was able to appreciate the same cast from different angles the second time I could see them from the first row so I could#get a clear view of their acting#and don’t get me wrong Zach and Lauren are really interesting to watch and I liked them#but also I started thinking if it was my first time to watch the show would I understand the appeal of Hades/Persephone line?#and I can’t stop thinking about it#hades#Persephone#hadestown broadway#hadestown west end#it’s also not about WE only but just about some characterisations I saw from different actors in different productions#I just felt like it would be fair to compare to the production and cast I saw life because obviously bootlegs even the greatest are not#the same#thanks for reading this long post
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Ok but what if…
#my art stuff#pizza tower#peppino spaghetti#fake peppino#bruno#mr stick#pizzaface#luigi’s mansion 3#poltergust#poltergust G-00#and the toppins would act as the toads#brick would probably be peach as much as I’d love his sniffer to make him polterpup#maybe one of the toppins replaces polterpup instead? maybe pineapple? why not.#i have no reasoning for it other than liking the pineapple a lot#I know it would make the most sense to make the bosses the BOSSES but I am so tempted to make them the base enemies cus I’m biased#but I suppose we could find a way to squeeze em into the characters#pepperman would obviously be morty so that’s easy at least#I honestly don’t remember all the bosses enough to really place the rest tho 😔#but as base ghosts pepperman would be the hammers. noise would be an oozer prolly. and honestly unsure about vigi OTL#I still haven’t finished the game past noise tho so I can’t speak for mr dude that I’m technically not supposed to know about yet#spoilers#just in case#digital art#whiteboard#i have literally no idea if anybody’s done this yet but I do feel pretty foolish for not thinking of it sooner.
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Not sure if you've done this before but Jimmy and Martyn having a picnic with stuffed animals :3 /nf
Day 407- I don’t know enough about fnaf to make a good pic out of it, I hope you don’t mind I combined it with another one. (And misremembered picnic as tea party)
#Whoops#my relationship with fnaf is really weird actually#I had a friend from 2nd to 5th grade and horror games were her favorite thing especially fnaf. And I was terrified of it#Still she was one of my best friends and I would watch her play whatever game she had on the bus coming home from school#Until 3rd grade when she introduced me to my best friend for the next 3 or so years and I hung out with her on the bus instead#So I was just scared of horror games for a while#UNTIL I DISCOVERED IMPULSESV AND THE JITS PHASMOPHOBIA#Eventually evolving into GIGGS#I think fnaf led me to my phasmo love basically#I still don’t know very much about the game. All I knew was dark and murder and animal. I learned more when the movie came out obviously#Buuuut im not confident enough in my knowledge to make something good#daily-pp#asks
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Maybe it’s too early for me to say this (I’m only on ep 3), but I’ve already seen people online saying that Jentry should be with Kit or Stella instead of Michael and it’s giving…😒
#we already saw jentry & Michael’s chemistry in ep 1 and they’re really cute together#very apparent they like each other#obviously I’m still early in but I highly doubt something will come up about Michael’s character that’s make me think he’s not a good match#yes ppl can have fun shipping however they please but the way these posts are worded & popping up ->#yall clearly don’t like that the main love interest is black#and would rather jentry be with anyone else#there are already many video essays on this (usually about black female love interests)#but yeah that’s what it’s giving#anyways the way the show is progressing I think multiple ships would be fun don’t get me wrong#but why are ppl so adamantly counting out Michael 👀#I’ll delete this later if i find something substantial once i finish the series#it#just thoughts#jentry chau vs the underworld
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I don’t Care about the ships WHERE IS JINX
#I’m so sad#I’m so sorry cai/tvi nation#I do not like that cop#I care about the siblings and the siblings alone#and ekko OBVIOUSly#Yk actually the ending was rlly good except the part where cait is still an enforcer b#and vi??? I don’t actually know if she is#ig she never quit#but she’s not wearing the blue so#idk#anyway I have a lot of thoughts#I’m really sad I was yelling in my room alone like a crazy person#AND MEL MY GOD HOW COULD I FOEGOR HER#I was blinded by the siblings im not gonna lie#but her arc was SO good#ok this got so rambly this was not meant to get like this#I wish we’d gotten like#1 more episode#to let the story breath a little bit#I think caits descent was brushed over tbh#I really fucked w the way they were going w it and then it just ended w a time skip#AND we don’t get Any resolution for it#I really hate the cop angle a lot#sorry I will never fuck w it#cait said and did terrible things and it’s really not… addressed#I would’ve loved to have seen her resign#I Wish vi could have dealt w how she betrayed her entire ideals and Became the very thing that tore her family apart in the first place#1-2 more episodes and more balls to go all in on the anti cop thing and I would have fucked w it meet#arcane spoilers
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I think maybe everyone should cool it with the “weird cult” comments regarding the covert, honestly. It wasn’t that funny to begin with but now that it’s the popular describer it’s starting to become a little uncomfy. No one is forced to join, no one is forced to stay. There’s a ton of parallels between them and real world cultures and religions and I just think MAYBE we need to be a little more aware of what message we’re sending when we say “haha that group of people who are in hiding because their lives were/are at stake and who practice anonymity to survive and follow certain rules that I don’t personally understand or like are a weird cult”.
#maybe we should lay off that word#I’m not the first person to say this obviously but now it’s starting to make me a little 😬#really wish this season had done what it should have and explored Din’s relationship with his faith#then maybe we’d learn more about the covert and Mandalorian culture and people wouldn’t feel the need to use this kind of language#they’re not a cult they’re just a group of people trying to survive in a universe that would prefer they did not#and that hits home for a lot of real people watching#anyway there’s that#the mandalorian#everyone a Din stan til we talk about how his faith is still a huge part of his character and his life#although the show really really needs to address how all of the events so far have changed his mindset#personally I don’t think he wants to leave his creed behind#but I think he would benefit from reevaluating what it means to him Now as opposed to when he took it as a child#the fact of the matter is: the covert and the creed are Important to Din on a fundamental level#would he enjoy you running around calling his family a cult? probs not#mine
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