#now we're down to pork

[the-fae-in-your-walls]

I once had a dream about eating fried chicken that was SO BAD that I can no longer think about eating chicken without feeling nauseous 🙃 my brain do be a weird, chicken-less place.

[sommerbueckers]

BYEE imagine a little blurb of paige x gf reader where reader is wearing THAT ONE urban outfitter top w the titties out and she’s just going ferallll

𝘨𝘶𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘱𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵…𝘴𝘰 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘶𝘱 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵, 𝘪𝘮 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶

___________________________________________________________

YOU WERE STANDING IN the mirror applying the last of your makeup— a little blush here, a little lipgloss there— when your girlfriend barged into the bathroom. She was already dressed, her makeup was done, hair was flawless, her phone charged and ready to go. She stared at you with narrow eyes.

"This is why we're late everywhere," she groaned, gesturing to the curling iron that was still hot and plugged in, and the makeup that was scattered around the sink.

"Well sorry not everyone wakes up as sexy as you," you mumbled absently, carefully lining your lips. "I need time."

"You need time management," she corrected.

You frowned and stood up straight, capping the liner and slipping it into your makeup bag. "Y'know you're one to talk, you get ready on time once and all of a sudden we're behind schedule because of me, you've got some nerve girl." When you were met with silence, you glanced at her to find her eyes on your chest. "Hello?"

Her eyes snapped up to yours, "Hm?"

"You're not even listening! You're just staring at my boobs," you accused her, gently poking her chest with your pointer finger.

"Can you blame me? I mean— they jus' sit so good in that shirt."

You playfully rolled your eyes, shutting off the bathroom light and leaving her alone in the darkness. She followed after you.

"You're gonna wear it outside?" she asked, now looking at your ass as you walked into the kitchen.

"Yes? Is that a problem for you?" you challenged.

"No," she scoffed, "Hell no. Would it look better in the house with some lil panties on? Probably. But, I can't stop you."

"You're right, you can't. So, let's go."

"I'LL TAKE THE PULLED PORK SANDWICH."

Paige had suggested taking a break in your errands and going to lunch. It didn't take much convincing, you hadn't eaten all day. You had had an odd craving for barbecue and ended up at a popular spot not too far from your apartment.

The waiter nodded at you, and then turned to Paige. "And for you?"

Paige didn't answer, her eyes glued to your cleavage as you shifted around in your seat. She had been unapologetically staring at day, lips parted, breathing heavy, an absolute wreck. Even now, with the waiter standing patiently as he waited for her to order, she couldn't bring herself to focus. He cleared his throat to no avail.

Finally noticing the way her attention was clearly on the wrong thing, you snapped your fingers in front of her face. "Paige."

"What?" she frowned, leaning back.

"Order your food."

"Shit, yeah." She quickly scanned the menu, "I'll take what she got, and you could bring out another shirley temple?"

"Sure thing," the guy nodded, flipping his notepad closed, taking the menus, and walking away.

"Dude you're a mess," you whispered, "Get yourself together, we're in public."

"So I can't admire my girlfriend in public?"

"I didn't say that, but you could at least pretend to be respectful about it," you said, laughing as you went to take a sip of your drink.

Paige shook her head, "Just wait 'till we get back home."

"YOU LOOK SO FUCKIN' GOOD RIGHT NOW," Paige murmured, hands behind her head as she leaned back on the couch. You had slowly pulled down your pants, taking your panties with them. Left in nothing but your urban outfitter top, you climbed on top of Paige's lap. Her hands instinctively went to your hips, sensually rubbing up and down. "Want you on my thigh."

"Oh!" you laughed out as you effortlessly moved you onto one of her legs, you bit your lip at the contact her thigh made with your core. "Take your sweatpants off..."

"Nuh uh," she smirked, "wanna see the mess you make." She glanced down at the wet spot on her light gray sweats from where she had just moved you. "C'mon mama, ride it."

___________________________________________________________

𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘢 𝘣𝘢𝘥..𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘴𝘮𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘶𝘵

[niiwa-angel]

Hazbin Hotel Incorrect Quotes

Vaggie, going over more ground rules for the hotel: Alright! We will be having weekly team dinners! Everybody will be taking a turn cooking!

Vaggie: Except Alastor, after the roast incident of April.

Alastor: You all said you wanted a shoulder roast.

Angel Dust: Pork shoulder, not Paul shoulder!

~~~

Alastor, calling a meeting: Listen up, you little shits.

Alastor: Not you Nifty, you're an angel and I'm happy you're here.

~~~

Valentino and Velvette, after losing Vox at the aquarium.

Val: He probably went to the shark tank. He likes sharks.

Vel: You're right.

Vel, laughing: He's probably in the shark tank, he likes sharks so much.

Val: Ha!

Both of them start running.

~~~

Husk: Hello, people who do not live here.

Cherri: Sup?

Husk: I gave you the key to my room for emergencies.

Frank the Egg Boi: We were out of molotov cocktails.

~~~

Charlie: What happens at Overlord meetings?

Alastor: Oh, you know. Boring discussions really. Lots of bureaucracy.

cut to the Overlord meeting

Vox, jumping up on the table: If you don't stop smacking me with your tail, I will end your entire family!

Zeezi: Bitch, try it!

Carmilla: Everyone sit down!

Velvette, recording: Can it old lady! This is gonna break the internet!

Clara smacks Velvette in the face with the handle of her spear: Don't talk to my mother like that!

Valentino: Don't smack my costume designer! She's getting blood all over her clothes!

Rosie, sampling: Tasty blood!

Alastor, also taking a taste: Indeed! Have you considered becoming a soup?

Zestial, fed the fuck up, slamming his hands on the table, effectively shutting everyone up.

Zestial: Sit. Down. Now.

Everyone sits down.

~~~

Lucifer: If you make your hot chocolate with water, you're out of the fucking hotel!

Lucifer: If you're lactose intolerant, you can stay but you're on thin ice!

Angel Dust: I just snort the powder because Vagina took my stash.

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: What the fuck?

~~~

Velvette, kicking through the door to the Overlord meeting: Hello losers!

Carmilla, not looking up from her tea: Hello, problem attendant.

~~~

Valentino, watching Vox freak out because of something Alastor did.

Val: Is it a chocolate pudding at three am type of night?

Vel: Does the day end with 'Y'?

~~~

Charlie: Can you guys get along for five minutes?

Lucifer and Alastor: No!

~~~

Vox and Valentino, aggressively making out in the kitchen.

Velvette: Can I get a waffle?

Valentino, rips his underwear off

Velvette: Can I please get a waffle?!

~~~

Carmilla: I am this close to losing it.

Zestial: Mine dear, there is no room between thine fingers?

Carmilla, watching Vox and Alastor argue viciously while Velvette, Valentino, and Rosie egg them on.

Carmilla: Yep.

~~~

Velvette: Selfie with the fossil!

Velvette, drags Zestial in for a selfie.

Zestial, noticing the filter: What witchcraft is this?

~~~

Vaggie: Okay people! If you're going to have weird food in the fridge, it needs to be labeled as such!

Vaggie: Alastor, that means labeling your demon meat! Angel, that means labeling your edibles!

Nifty, raising her hand: Are my roaches okay?

Vaggie: We're actually going to get you a mini fridge for your room, because your roaches are creeping people out.

~~~

Charlie: I love you.

Vaggie: I love you too.

Pentious, from the wall: AWWWW!

~~~

Carmilla: Acceptable snacks to bring to the Overlords meeting; brownies, candy boards, cheese plates, and veggie trays.

Carmilla: Unacceptable snacks to bring to the Overlords meeting; anything made with demons, magic mushroom cereal bars, and penis shaped gummies.

Zestial, a spider: I am also not a fan of the mint tea.

~~~

Charlie: Okay! I know its funny that Alastor and I can't walk on ice, but that doesn't mean it's okay to freeze the hallway to watch us slip!

~~~

Husk: I have very high standards.

Angel Dust, pulling out a machine gun and opening fire.

Husk: Oh no! He's meeting all my standards!

[sweetbunpura]

Limited Time Menu

Mostro Lounge is moderately busy on most days, mostly due to Azul's marketing and the like. But for tonight, the Lounge was PACKED. Waiters were running too and fro around the dinning room, taking orders and serving food to customers. The infamous first years sat at a booth as they took in the atmosphere.

"Damn, it took forever to get a seat." Ace grumbled. "What's going on today?"

"I heard Azul was running a new limited time menu." Jack responded. "Maybe that's why everyone's piling in here."

"Hmph." Sebek crossed his arms. "What would be so important to bring the student body here?"

"I mean..." Deuce started. "We're here."

Epel chimed. "Yeah, but, we're not here for the promotion and Ortho's here because he wants to hang out. Grim is also a give in."

"Mm-hmm!" Ortho nodded and smiled.

"It's too noisy." Grim huffed. "And Henchhuman said she had stuff to do for the next week."

"Hi, Freshies!" They turned their attention to Ruggie. "Here's the menus! Now, what can I get you started on?"

Jack answered "Water's just fine. Right, guys?" They nodded.

"Sure, sure." Ruggie wrote it down. "And we got a limited time menu going on, only available for the next three days."

"What's the best thing?" Ace asks.

"Honestly? All of it." Ruggie sighs. "We ran out of four things today, so you better get it while it's going."

"Thanks, Ruggie-senpai."

The hyena beastman nodded and left, leaving the first years to look over the menu.

"There's six things on here. Ruggie made it seem like it was a lot." Ace frowns.

"It all sounds good though." Deuce mutters as he looks at the menu. "The Chicken-fried Steak sounds good."

"So do the Biscuits and Gravy." Epel hums as he imagines the food.

"I'm interested in the Jambalaya." Sebek voices.

"Chicken and Waffles?" Ace raises an eyebrow. "I'll guess I'll go for it."

"I wonder what a Shrimp Po' Boy is..." Jack reads the ingredients.

"Gimme those Smothered Pork Chops!" Grim licked his lips.

"Here's your water." Ruggie set it down. " I think I heard Grim yelling out an order." He pulled out his pad. "So, we're ready?"

As each boy gave their order and Ruggie departed to fill in the order, Mostro continued to fill with new customers and those who left sang praises of the menu. A couple of minutes later and their food was out, piping hot and smelling good.

"That smells so good, holy shit." Ace eyed his food.

The others nodded and Ruggie bid them farewell. They took their first bite and an explosion of flavor filled their mouths.

"No way..." Deuce tore into the chicken fried steak. "How is this so good?"

"I want a second helping!" Epel was roughly halfway thought his meal.

"Who knew this food combination would be so good?" Jack took another bite of his sandwich.

Sebek was silent as he nearly finished off his plate. Grim was happily eating, shoving the pork chops in his mouth. By the time Ruggie returned, they had finished as they all looked full and content.

"Thank you for choosing Mostro Lounge tonight!" The hyena beastman took the payment. "We hope you choosing us again!"

As closing time neared, eventually the dining room cleared and the Lounge closed. In the kitchen, Azul addressed the staff with a smile on his face.

"Today was an extremely busy night!" He clapped his hands. "And I'm glad everyone continued to work hard! A round of applause for everyone!" He waited as their cheers settled down. "And thank Yuu-san for allowing us to borrow some of her time!"

Yuu gave a tired smile as she leaned against one of the pillars and cheers filled the room. Afterwards, the dorm members went to bed and Yuu bid the trio goodnight as she left.

"I'm gonna go pass out." She gave a kiss to Floyd's check as she departed. "Night."

"You're in a good mood, Azul. I'm assuming profits were good tonight?" Jade asked once the door closed.

Azul hummed. "Yes! Fantastically so! There was a 65% increase!"

Jade nodded. "And what of you, Floyd? I saw you back to back with Miss Yuu in the kitchen. Since she refuses to share her family recipes with us, surely you know them?"

Azul turned to Floyd with rapt attention. "Oh? Do tell, Floyd."

Floyd shook his head and leaned back in his chair. "Nah. I promised Shirmpy that I wouldn't tell ya anythin'." He yawned. "And I value that promise more than I value anythin' else."

The octopus merman deflated as Jade chuckled. The perks of being the best friend and boyfriend to one amazing chef. Floyd closed his eyes and smiled.

"But~ Her food was so good. She let me try everythin'~"

"Don't tell me that!"

[sarnai4]

Epic Translations

Nobody = Odysseus of Ithaca

Please, don't make me do this = Dang, I'm about to add to my body count

I'm just a man = No one's perfect, especially me who might be making a huge mistake soon

Unless, of course, you apologize = There is literally nothing you could do right now that won't result in me commiting mass murder

I see your wife with a man who is haunting = My man, you are going down a dark road and will be with your wife eventually, but...traumatized doesn't even begin to describe you

I have something that I must confess = I messed up. Like very badly. As in I cost us a few hundred soldiers, but we're still cool, right?

You are the worst kind of good 'cause you're not even great = I'm having fun physically assaulting you and want to also shame you for not killing my son like the little (redacted) that you are

Let me bring you all something to eat = I'm going to turn you into pigs. So, if you're eating pork, try to not think of any previous guests I've had

How much longer till your luck runs out = I'm getting the urge to disobey a direct order and want to emotionally prepare you for betrayal

I've got a secret I can no longer keep = Reading the room is for suckers. I feel bad and am going to emotionally destroy you right here at Scylla's tentacles to get this off my chest

Light six torches = It's important to keep our mouths shut sometimes. This was one of those times, Eurylochus

Someone's got to die today and you have got the final say = I'm THE Zeus, so if I want to add some trauma to a mortal, then I'll do it and make a spectacle of it

I know = I know that you'll die, but I also know that you JUST betrayed me after admitting to another time when you did. So, your death isn't on the top of my worry list. I'll make you a nice tombstone in Ithaca. It'll say "Here's where Eurylochus would lay one day further in the future if not for his foolishness with bags and sheep"

[supernatural-bias]

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐀𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐁𝐨𝐲𝐬 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

↳ notes: just wanted to do something in honor of sorry boys going on hiatus. this is entirely based on their last video so watch that to understand the silly headcanon time. cc!wilbur likers will be blocked by the way, thanks. get out of here

↳ warnings: none. just the four members here. four original, and only, members of sorry boys. no one else

↳ song: campus—vampire weekend

masterlist | commissions | carrd

• You'd think that an afternoon shift at a trampoline park would be easy; especially on the down days. Hanging around the snack bar with your employees, blowing whistles at loud kids, and keeping whatever was left in the lost and found bin became something of a daydream to you upon first getting hired

• It was a better alternative to the fast food joint you had worked previously at a crazed food van—you'd rather do anything but that after quitting

• Your first tip that things weren't going to be that easy should have been the camera crew that shuffled in on your second week, lead in part by a blonde guy with a stack of pre-signed waivers in his hand

• "What's up with that?" You turned to your only other coworker at the hour, a lanky guy with a mask and fluffed up hair. You thought you remember his name starting with an R or something along the lines of that, but mostly you referred to him as 'dude' or 'hey you.' He never felt the need to correct you, so you just never stopped

• "Oh yeah." He'd responded with a tired voice while barely even looking around. "Uh, we have a group that comes in every few days and rents out the place. I've seen them bouncing around, and I'm not really sure they're, uh, stable I guess you could say."

• Glancing down from the reception desk and to the play floor below, you caught a glimpse of the three others he spoke of, one being the blonde kid from earlier, surrounded by a few cameras and doing some rather weak jump moves. One in a red fat suit fell over at one point and refused to get up as he rolled around on the floor whining

• "Er," You took a step out of the reception desk area as you pointed a finger down at the scene. "Shouldn't one of us be down there? Supervising, and all that." You neglected to mention that one of the men looked old enough to be your father and should probably be mediating them

• For a moment you thought your coworker would shrug and tell you to go on, but he just sighed and grabbed his whistle like a weary office worker preparing for a morning round

• "At least this time I won't be alone." He looked at you. The eyebags under his eyes made you feel like he'd done this a lot more than he'd ever wanted to, despite only being at work a few weeks more than you

• The next few minutes went by fine. You were mostly ignored by the two fellows in fat suits as they proceeded to say 'dude' and 'bro' far too much, and was only offered a high five by the same blonde— Tungo you now knew. At one point the cameramen pulled you and the other worked over for a small interview, the likes of which you seemed to enjoy more than him

• The first time either of you really had to step in was when the red fat suit one delved into his shell, yelling something about yoinking his pork

• "Chungus? Chungo?" You managed to say his name without somehow laughing. "Please don't do that. We're gonna have some problems if you continue to."

• As Chounce popped his head out like a cartoon character to look at you, you offered a wobbly smile, and was severely relieved when he finally brought his hands out of his suit to cross them

• "For the record dude I wasn't even pulling my plug." He frowned, having the decency to look midly embarrassed. "I was just thinking about my feelings, bro."

• You got a thankful look from your fellow employee at your successful endeavors

• The both of you continued to watch as a competition between Chounce and Tungo occurred, eventually somehow turning into a fight between them as the self proclaimed Master Za watched

• In reality, you were pretty sure their real names all aligned somewhere along the lines of Tommy Charlie and Phil, if the signatures on their wavers spoke for anything, but none of them seemed to call each other anything but nonsense

• At one point, you were compelled enough by the entertainment to purchase a bag of popcorn from the snack desk, earning a look at disappointment from your coworker as he saw

• "Please don't encourage them." He dragged a hand down his face, careful not to knock his mask off

• "I don't think it'd matter if I did or didn't." You smiled through a mouthful. "Just look at 'em." You waved at the kid zone they'd all migrated too in the last hour or two, currently kissing Master Za on the face as he yelped in protest

• "Wait." Your hand lowered slowly as you blinked. "That's not allowed—"

• The two of you took off in their direction, using your whistles for what felt like the hundredth time that day as you ran

• By the time closing hours came around, it was dark enough outside to make you yawn. It took a significant amount of convincing to get the three of them, mostly Chounce, to leave and stop bouncing, but it eventually worked with a few well placed bribes. Namely, handfuls from your unfinished chip bag from earlier

• "You weren't all that bad! Not a wrong'un after all." Tungo eventually confided in you in front of everyone as you went to close up, looking strangely proud about such a mediocre compliment. You grinned at him anyways, finding him to be one of the saner ones throughout the whole ordeal

• "Maybe next time I could judge a match of yours, yeah?" You offered as you thumbed through the cash in the register

• "Please do not encourage them." A familiar voice from outside sounded for the second time that day, making you suck air between your teeth in an attempt not to snort with laughter

• "And remember to check the bathrooms before you leave. One of them likes to hide in them after we close."

• "Sorry, what—"

• You ended up having to drag Chounce out bt his ankles that night and into Master Za's car so he could get home

• "You know what? It's still better than the food truck."

[makeitmingi]

The Cat and Dog Game [Chapter 5]

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Chef!Reader, RestaurantOwner!Yunho, MaitreD!Hongjoong, Waiter!Yeosang, Waiter!San, Waiter!Mingi, SousChef!Seonghwa, SousChef!Wooyoung, PrepChef!Jongho

Summary: Yunho's dream was to open and run his own restaurant. But he doesn't know anything when it comes to cooking. Until you came along and accepted the job, bringing with you a small crew. How will the black cat tame the energetic golden retriever?

Word count: 3.2K

You all returned for dinner service. Like this morning, Yunho and his friends were not there yet, still resting from their mid day break. You made yourself a large container of iced coffee, tying your apron around your waist.

"Do eateries really benefit from a mid day break though?" Wooyoung asked as he washed his hands.

"Well, in this case, they sold out all that we made so I guess Yunho wasn't confident in continuing to stay open." You shrugged.

"They could still serve drinks." Seonghwa reasoned.

"But staying open with drinks only and no food might hurt the revenue. How much you make from drinks compared to food and drinks is so much lesser. It would be smarter for them to rest."

"That's true. Since they are the wait staff for the dinner service and they'll be cleaning up after." Jongho said.

"Don't they have someone to clean?" Wooyoung scoffed.

"They seem to only have someone that washes the dishes and then he leaves. Looks like the cleaning for the front of the house is all reliant on themselves." You informed. After some light conversations, you all began to get into preparing for dinner. As the prep chef, Jongho did all the slicing and vegetable prep.

"I should start prepping the seafood for the cioppino." Seonghwa went to get all the seafood. While Jongho sliced the vegetables, you made the compound gochujang butter for the chicken.

"The vegetables are done. How are we cutting the chicken for roasting? Halves or quarters?" Jongho asked.

"Let's do halves. They're quite small." You replied.

"Since we're searing the pork medallions towards service, I'll make the cherry sauce to get it ready to go." Wooyoung spoke. You hummed and crossed it off the list.

"I'll start with the chickens." You stood beside Jongho. As he butchered the chickens, you stuffed the compound butter under the skin.

"What fish were we using for the cioppino again?" Seonghwa asked.

"Monkfish." You reminded.

"That's the last chicken. I'm going to remove the silver skin of the pork tenderloin and portion it. Are you good here?" Jongho asked you. You gave him a thumbs up and he went to wipe down his station since he was handling the raw chicken.

Although Jongho was a prep chef, as he says, he usually handled whole dishes on his own. You were fine with it, the sous chef, prep chef titles didn't matter much to you.

"Oh when you're done washing up, help me preheat the oven?" You requested. He nodded and went to turn on the ovens for you.

"Ah, where is the madeira?" Wooyoung whined, walking out of the walk in fridge.

"It should be in the pantry instead of the walk in, Woo." Seonghwa informed. Wooyoung went to the dry pantry to look for the alcohol while Jongho tended to his sauce for him momentarily.

"Okay, that's the last chicken." You said, going to wash your hands and getting all the components together.

You laid the vegetables Jongho prepped at the bottom of the trays and seasoned them then you placed racks on top for the chicken to sit.

"Hwa, help me bring the trays into the oven?" You asked. Seonghwa nodded, lowering the fire on his stew before helping you carrying the remaining trays. You slid them into the preheated oven and closed the door. You set a timer and clipped it to your apron before moving onto the next dish.

"Cherry sauce for the pork is done. Shall I start on the dessert?" Wooyoung came up to you.

"Yes. Do the panna cotta now so it can set in time. But don't forget to make the parsnip puree for the pork dish." You told him.

"I won't. I'll do the panna cottas now." He went back into the walk in to get what he needed. When Jongho was done portioning out the pork and setting that aside, he did the raspberry coolis.

"Cioppino is simmering. We'll have to fire the bread during service." Seonghwa helped you with the Korean dessert.

"Oh! I forgot the makeolli ice cream needs to be churned. Let's get it done now?" You remembered.

"On it." Seonghwa took the ice cream machine out.

"I think the last time I made bukkumi was with my grandfather." You laughed as you made the red bean paste that will go inside the glutinous rice dough and pan fried.

"Actually, we haven't done much Korean desserts in a while. Our recent desserts are all Western or Japanese, we did our wagashi workshop together. We should start doing more of those." Wooyoung said. You all nodded in agreement.

"Thinking of using these for the mushrooms that will go into the pasta dish." Jongho showed the metal bowl with the mix of different mushroom types.

"Looks good. Maybe not shitake since it might overpower. And soak the dried porcinis." You looked through the bowl.

"Okay. I'll mix the dried porcinis and the dried black trumpets." Jongho went to the pantry.

"It smells so good in here!" Yunho came in with a big smile. Wooyoung and Seonghwa gave friendly smiles back. You and Jongho were so focused, you just blocked everything else out.

"Hi, (y/n). Did you get some rest?" Yunho asked, standing beside you. You looked up at him, taking a small step to the side but nodded.

Not that you had anything against Yunho but you valued your personal space, especially around people you were not very close with.

"Do you need help?" He grinned.

"Do you not need to help the others prepare for dinner?" You raised an eyebrow. Yunho shook his head, he really enjoyed being in the kitchen with you the other night. And he was never really one that stuck around the kitchen. The only time he was ever in there was when he was with his grandmother.

"Go wash get an apron and wash your hands." You nodded over to the sink. Yunho let out a small 'yes!' in cheer and went over to get an apron. Once he tied it around his waist, he washed his hands.

"What should I do?" He asked enthusiastically.

"Jongho is preparing the glutinous rice dough for me. For now, let's split these red bean balls and weigh them." You instructed.

"Like this." You demonstrated, taking a spoon of red bean paste and rolling it into a ball with your hands, weighing it to the exact weight then setting it in the tray.

"I can do that!" He nodded. But the moment he spooned the bean paste onto his hand, he dropped it.

"I didn't know it would be hot." He pouted.

"It's only slightly warm. You can wear the gloves there." You pointed with your elbow and Yunho trudged over to get them. Again, imagining Yunho's puppy ears pressed to his head in disappointment made you let out a small chuckle.

"Are you laughing at me?" Yunho's eyes were wide. You didn't think he heard you.

"No." You shook your head. To be honest, he wasn't the only one surprised, Wooyoung, Jongho and Seonghwa were a little surprised too.

Yunho resumed his spot next to you and began to do the task. Good thing he was meticulous, wanting to be as accurate as possible when weighing each ball of red bean paste.

"Dough kneaded and done. I'll let it rest." Jongho said, placing the big bowl with the dough beside you.

"Thanks." You momentarily stepped aside to see the progress with the others.

"How's it looking?" You looked into the ice cream churner.

"It should be good to go into the freezer in 45 minutes. The ratios should be correct that it still freezes despite the alcohol in it." Seonghwa nodded. With alcohol in ice creams, there can only be a certain percentage you put in or else the alcohol will prevent the ice cream from properly freezing.

"Panna cotta is going into the chiller!" Wooyoung announced with a tray in his hands. Jongho helped him with carrying the other trays with all the white ramekins.

"Jong, you can start the prep for garnishes. Woo, you can start on your parsnip puree. Hwa, can you help me make a chicken jus?"

"Sure." The three replied and split up. Once the glutinous rice dough was done, you began to portion those out too.

"Done. Shall I move onto that?" Yunho asked excitedly, putting the last ball of red bean paste onto the tray. You nodded and let him assist you in weighing the glutinous rice dough.

"Good evening." San, Mingi, Yeosang and Hongjoong came in after preparing the restaurant for dinner.

"Evening."

"Wow, you guys look so fancy." Wooyoung chuckled. While there was no waiter or staff uniform, the boys all wore button up shirts and dress pants.

"Wow, it's looking good. Anything we can help with?" Yeosang came over to look at what you were doing alongside Yunho.

"You can help Yunho portion these out. Then I'll start wrapping them." You said. After washing their hands, they came to help where they could with their limited kitchen skills. You placed a red bean ball in the middle of a circle of dough and wrapped it.

"So you're going to fry these after?" Hongjoong asked.

"Pan fry it to get the outside a little crispy. Then we're serving it with makgeolli ice cream." You told him.

"We have 1 hour. Can we make 1 of each dish that is prepared for service for tasting?" You called out. The 3 immediately fell into the rhythm of things.

"Chicken is in the warming oven so let's dish that." You said and Jongho brought the components to you for plating.

"Bread for cioppino going on the grill."

"Pork medallions going on the pan."

"I need a sous at the pass." You said. Seonghwa stepped up and you took over to make the miso butter pasta with mushrooms. The 5 other boys huddled closer to not be in the way.

"Woah." They watched in awe at how all of you worked together, handing components to Seonghwa to plate and put together to be served. Since it wasn't Michelin restaurant, Seonghwa got the plating done quickly. There was no need to micro garnishes but it still looked pretty and well put together.

"Desserts are not ready." Wooyoung informed after checking if the panna cottas were set.

"It's fine. Can we just monitor them and make sure they're ready towards the start of actual service?" You asked and he nodded.

"Watch your back." You cautioned as you placed the hot pan with the miso butter pasta. Seonghwa took a carving fork to twirl it into pretty cylinder. He then spooned the sauce over with the mushrooms.

"Can we sprinkle some chives over?" You said, looking over at the dish. Jongho sliced the chives.

"Better." Seonghwa hummed as he grated the bottarga over then sprinkled the chives over to give it flecks of green.

"Service." Seonghwa said, lining the dishes up. All 5 boys had sparkles in their eyes, their jaws slacked, as they looked over all the dishes in front of them.

"Appetisers, we went a little simple. Bruschetta, mini ham cheese croquetas, crispy brussel sprouts with lemon gochugaru dressing."

"Mains. This is miso butter pasta with mushroom medley and bottarga, we have pork medallions with parsnip puree and cherry madeira sauce, gochujang butter roast chicken with roast vegetables and a chicken jus. Lastly, cioppino with grilled ciabatta." Seonghwa introduced.

"We'll definitely look into exploring a bigger variety of appetisers after tonight." You added. Yunho nodded and they all dug into the dishes to taste.

"The chicken is so good. How did you get all the flavour in?" Yeosang was in disbelief.

"So we made a gochujang butter and we put it under the skin to roast. Then we let all that drip onto the vegetables." You explained.

"The pork dish is my favourite. I love that sauce." San pointed to the dish with his spoon and gave a thumbs up. You gestured to Wooyoung, who was responsible for the dish.

"Hmm..." Wooyoung deliberated after taking a taste of the dish. San blinked in confusion.

"Do you not think it's good?" San asked.

"I mean, it's good. But it is missing something." Wooyoung replied. You took a taste and Wooyoung looked at you for confirmation. You nodded in agreement.

"We have fennel. I'll grill it?" Wooyoung suggested. You hummed and Wooyoung left to go to the walk in to get the fennel. Without anyone else noticing, Hongjoong was finishing the pasta on his own. When the others noticed, it was too late, making them yell at the older male for not leaving them any.

"You snooze you lose?" Hongjoong shrugged. You noticed Yunho had not said anything.

"Any comments? Changes?" You turned to him. Yunho blinked, shaking his head to break his train of thought when he noticed that you were asking him directly.

"It's all really, really good." He said, the tip of his fork still in his mouth. You waited, feeling like he still had something else to say.

"I'm not sure if the food is too fancy..." He confessed. You paused for a while to let his words sink in.

"Would you prefer more homey dishes then?" Jongho asked.

"Let's see how the dinner service plays out before we decide for sure." Yunho said. You nodded in agreement, there wasn't much for you to say since he was the owner, not you.

There was now an awkwardness that hung in the air. Yunho was nervous, he hoped he didn't let his nerves throw you off your game.

"Let's take 5." You said. Wooyoung, Jongho, Seonghwa and yourself stepped out to relax before dinner service. The remaining boys went out to where Yunho was. Mingi looked at his best friend, who was spacing out behind the counter.

"Yunho ah. What was that? You okay?" Mingi tapped Yunho on the shoulder.

"Did I sound too arrogant? Too demanding? They put in all that effort and I just... should I not have said that? I just want the customers to like the place." Yunho panicked.

"It's fine, Yunho. I'm sure they didn't take it to heart. You have to be honest as the restaurant owner." San assured.

"Yes, compared to what I see on television, you were very nice in your reaction." Yeosang said.

"You're too nice, Yunho ah." Hongjoong chuckled, patting his tall friend on the shoulder. Yunho pouted, he didn't like telling people bad news or anything remotely negative.

"And like you said, you didn't say the food was bad. It just might not suit what customers are looking for." Mingi comforted.

"Let's focus on dinner service now." San massaged Yunho's shoulders to relieve the tension.

"This is the list of reservations. If there are still tables available, the online system will add the reservation as it comes in." Yeosang gave the iPad to Hongjoong to refer to the guest list, showing him the online booking sytem. Hongjoong hummed, nodding as he scrolled through and got familiar with it.

"For us, let's split the dining area this way. Into 3. So we don't get any mix ups or repeats, it is easier to keep track of which tables you are responsible for." San said to Yeosang and Mingi.

"Good idea." Mingi nodded.

Meanwhile, your team was back in the kitchen cooking, unaware of Yunho's 'almost' meltdown that was happening outside.

"Too fancy..." You drummed your fingers against the work top. Maybe you needed to go home and research more on what kind of fare and flavours you should be utilising.

"Don't think too hard." Seonghwa chuckled, coming over to kiss the top of your head.

"Don't mock me, Park." You rolled your eyes, shoving him away.

"Let's finish this service then go out. Drinks on Jongho!" Wooyoung said, slinging his arms over yours and Seonghwa's shoulders. Jongho slapped the back of Wooyoung's neck.

"Don't go volunteering my wallet." Jongho glared.

"Yah! I'm your hyung! Show some respect." Wooyoung whined, stomping his feet while Jongho made a face at him, sticking his tongue out. You let out a soft sigh and shook your head, going back to your station, letting Seonghwa mediate their bickering.

Yunho's feedback didn't negatively affect you, it made you want to work harder. You were glad that he was objective and honest, not just saying the food was good.

"We're opening the doors for dinner in 5 minutes." Yunho said through the small pick up window and disappeared.

"I forgot we have that service window." Jongho laughed.

"We've just been talking and serving through the door, which can be dangerous. We should use the window that's actually for passing food and tickets." You reminded.

"Let's do this." You gave each other pats on the shoulder and waited for the first tickets to come in.

"First customers walked in." Seonghwa informed, observing through the window.

Once the orders were taken, the waiters will key it in and the ticket will come through on the machine that's in the kitchen. It cuts the time the waiters have to come and handover tickets, it also makes it easier for whoever is at the window to sort out the orders and give out instructions to the rest of the team.

"First tickets coming in." Seonghwa announced.

Dinner service went by smoothly, there wasn't a manic rush but things weren't slow as well, which was good for Yunho. You were all able to take little 5 minute breaks in between.

"Last ticket going out. Service." Seonghwa rang the bell for pick up at the window. You let out a tired sigh, hearing Seonghwa's words.

"First day done." Wooyoung came, slinging his arm around you. You tiredly leaned against him.

"Let's clean up and prep for tomorrow before going home." You stood up. You, Wooyoung, Seonghwa and Jongho gave each other side hugs to commend one another.

"Good work today, everyone." You smiled.

"Of course, we have our leader to guide us." Seonghwa smiled softly, making you look away.

"Do your dishes." You cleared your throat. You washed the big pots, pans and trays that you used. For the bowls, you all left them on the counter neatly to dry overnight, except for the ones you were going to use now.

"Before we clean the stove and the grill, let's cook some dinner." Jongho suggested. There wasn't much but the 4 of you used whatever leftovers you could find to whip something up.

"I wish we had some of that roast chicken leftover. It was seriously good." Wooyoung pouted.

"Luckily we had some piece of the pork medallions left that we could cube up." Seonghwa said, taking a portion of pasta for himself.

The dish was a pasta with garlic, onions, basil fresh tomatoes, cubed pork pieces. Jongho sauteed the leftover mushrooms, serving that alongside the leftover roast vegetables.

"Hwa, call the front team in. I'm stepping out for a bit. You guys start eating first." You told them.

"Sure." The 3 nodded, not protesting or asking any questions.

"Hey, we made a simple dinner before we start tomorrow's prep. Would you guys like some?" Seonghwa asked. The 5 nodded their heads and entered the kitchen. Just like this morning, Yunho noticed that you were not around. Did you leave after service? Did you eat dinner before you left?

~

Series masterlist

[ciaomarie]

Part 1: What then?

Some seemingly innocent, but truly mind-altering information is shared in a staff meeting.

Short fan fic. Low-key Sydcarmy/The Bear fluff. Post-season 2. Canon-compliant.

Location: The Bear

Time: 10:05 a.m.

The restaurant had closed lunch service on a Tuesday for a "Development Day". The Bear had been open for 5 months and had a 2 month wait list! After Family and Friends when they had all banded together the Bear crew had gotten tighter than ever. Carmen had been a outsider in his own restaurant for a couple weeks, but soon the dust settled. Even Sydney came around after 3 weeks of his patient groveling. The duo was good and soon The Bear had become one of Chicago Tribune's "Best New Restaurants." However, with success The Bear was changing fast. They had hired more full-time front and kitchen staff, which was great. The downside was that "respectful communication" and "customer complaint management" was waning a little. Things were not terrible, but Richie for whom Ever set the bar in hospitality, The Bear should always be improving, not sliding backwards. Natalie, Carmen and Sydney agreed. They also wanted to discuss new menu changes and a to-go system they would be testing soon.

"Okay, people! Let's get started" Natalie said beckoning everyone to take a seat at the front of house.

Richie stood next her "casually dressed" in a button down blue dress shirt and dark grey slacks.

He began, "As you know The Bear is on track to paying off the loan and we're the freakin' toast of the town right now, but this is not the time to take a nap. We gotta keep our eyes on the prize. So first, up facial regulation as known as RBF awareness."

Natalie tapped his shoulder and whispered, "Richie, I love your enthusiasm, but I thought we might start with an ice breaker?"

He shrugged and continued, "But Nat, has a ice breaker. Take it away".

Natalie resumed.

"So, first we want to thank each of you for being part of this dream and making it fun, rewarding, and successful. As you know The Bear is a family business and since there's new faces here we'd like to get to know you better and vice versa. We'll start with a quick round of "Best and Worst". Just pick a question out of the cup and answer it. Please keep your answers to 2 minutes."

The first question went to Randall, a young man in his early 20's with dark curly hair and thick glasses that frequently fogged in the humid kitchen. He was the new assistant pastry chef.

"What was the best place I ever lived? Hm…Guam. My dad, Army, was stationed on the base and I lived there from age 9-11. I had like 12 friends just on my block and we were always playing soccer, swimming, or riding our bikes. It was awesome."

"Thanks Randall!" Natalie chirped.

The next went to Tina.

"Ok…what is worst advice I've ever been given? Keep your head down and do what you know. That's the advice I used to give myself. Thankfully I didn't listen because now I'm a sous chef!"

Sydney who was sitting near the front between Gary and Carmy, beamed at Tina who returned the smile with a little moisture in her eyes.

The next question went to Marcus.

"Best moment in the last year? It was training at Noma, in Copenhagen. It was my first international trip. I got to stay in a houseboat, explore the city, meet cool people, and figure out that I wanted to do this maybe forever."

The last several months had been really hard due to Marcus's mom's passing. He had returned to work after a week of mourning citing that he knew she wouldn't want him to sit at home now that she was no longer sick. Despite that he was getting better every day and had come up with several new popular dessert specials. Tina was seated next to him and patted his arm.

The next few questions went to new dishwasher, Chris, Fak, and then Gary.

Sydney drew the next question and winced upon reading it. It wouldn't be possible to lie because Marcus already knew the truth.

"What was my best meal ever? Well…it was this pork confit with onions and rhubarb. Then after I had this dish called Milk and Honey."

She kept her eyes plastered on the tiny strip of paper while she spoke. In her peripheral field she could see Carm turning slightly towards her, his cornflower blue eyes boring two holes into the side of her head.

"Sounds grand. Ok, Carmy pick a question" Richie ordered wanting to get down to business by 10:30am.

Carmy didn't seem to hear him. He was on another planet.

"Yo cuz, pick a question!"

He startled and drew a question.

"Uh ok. Best part of my day? Hmmm. Closing up."

It was now Sydney's soul's turn to exit her body. Every night, with few exceptions, she and Carmy ended the night in his office to debrief on the day, perform last checks, and close together.

After a moment she felt his eyes still glancing at her. Without turning she whispered, "Later." The last thing she needed was to look at him, and forget how much time was passing, giving Richie yet another reason to tease them. Not long ago he gave them matching copies of a workplace relationship etiquette tip sheet stapled to an OSHA industrial hygiene handout before leaving them to close.

She sighed, trying to compose herself. It was no big deal. So what that Carm knew he was responsible for the best thing she ever ate? Also, they're partner-friends so it's totally normal that his favorite time of day when is they are together…alone. Right?

UH OH.

[suzie-shooter]

Alex Rider season 3 unhinged liveblog ramblings scribbled during first watch. Spoilers, obvs. (also fair warning, I am not particularly a fan of Tom or Kyra lol)

Episode 1 - Widow

S2 recap trivia - Alex's therapist is Molly Doran from Slow Horses and married to Alan Blunt IRL

Malta: Ok, so we're not just going to pretend it's Venice lol.

Creepy old men already hitting on Alex. Standard.

"After this we're out of leads." How do you even have any leads in the first place? Oh ok, Smithers' phone. Terrible security protocols from him, leaving that much historical classified data on it.

"Find the Widow - surely he could have given you an address?" First thing Tom's ever said I've agreed with lmao

Aaaand within a second he's back to being deeply irritating, okay.

Yassen living rent free in Alex's head, you love to see it.

"They've got this picture of me being the responsible one." Have Tom's parents actually met him?

Ooh Razim mention.

You maybe want to clean that wound before whacking a dressing on it Alex?

"Do you think you'll ever lose your appetite Nile?" Spat my drink.

Damn, no harem pants then. Scrubs up well tho.

Listing Levin in the opening credits than having him be only a S2 flashback should be a warcrime.

Episode 2 - Lab

"This weapon is called pork sword, wait, no, shit, wrong USB."

"Julia Rothman. Definitely a wrong un." Spat my drink again.

Do Crawley and Pritchard not warrant helmets and visors? Are they somehow immune to shrapnel?

So, room 6, wired to blow, yes? It's what I'd do…

Oh yeah sure guys, they're going to still be sitting there, all unmoving in the dark, for sure that's a person, and not a Massive Trap.

Thereeeee we go. Agent mince. Top of your class huh, well you're certainly at the top now, and down the sides and partially out of the window.

I know there's the whole 'characters don't know what genre they're in' thing but you are literally in the 'working for MI6 genre', you are up against people notorious for booby traps and blowing shit up, why the fuck would you touch something that hadn't been declared safe first? Apart from anything else you're fucking up the scene before forensics get there.

"I love you man." Vom.

Alex: breaks into super sekkrit lab. Also Alex: doesn't have the faintest fucking idea what he's looking at, so not really helpful.

COMICALLY LARGE BOMB KLAXON.

Episode 3 - Enemy

"Welcome to Malagosto." OooOOooh.

Maybe I'm just looking at it from a fic writer's perspective but it does seem a massive anticlimax to immediately let Tom and Kyra know Alex is okay? Like, you could have got a good couple of episodes of angst out of that uncertainty.

"Do you want me to kill them?" Oh God yes please.

Why the fuck have they plugged the USB directly into the network rather than an isolated PC? 'Hur dur we checked it first', you literally believe Scorpia are smart enough to not be bluffing about the nebulous death threat but you don't think they could hide something on the hardware? Fuck's sake lads. Amateur hour.

Is this Home Secretary meant to be Suella Braverman? Or Priti Patel maybe lol. (Equal rights and all that, and if it had been a white male character I don't think I would have thought twice about the dialogue but having both your two new female characters be immediately proved wrong/ massively patronised/ blown up ain't hugely comfortable viewing tbh).

HOW MANY FICS INVOLVING ALEX GETTING FUCKED ON THAT BED HAVE JUST BEEN BORN?

"Are you suggesting we break into a dead man's house?" "It's not like he's going to be there." 😂

"He became a very close friend of mine." Fnar.

Omg making Alex read his father's love letters is hilarious.

Alex: you could have faked that news report Also Alex: handwriting can definitely never be faked (how is Alex even familiar with his dead father's handwriting? wouldn't recognise mine)

Ugh please stop trying to make Alex/Kyra happen.

Alex up the vent shaft. I hope they're sitting casually at the top going - you could have just taken the stairs love.

If he's climbing upwards, why is his hair dangling like he's upside down? Have they filmed this like 60's Batman, and he's just crawling along a horizontal set lol.

Alex never once asks about his mother does he. Given the shagger-John route they seem to have gone down you almost think Julia would be in a better shout of getting Alex to switch sides by claiming to be his mother.

And - yeah, Alex's recruitment just doesn't feel that convincing here. Adding Tom/Kyra/Jack so much to the mix has changed the feel of his life a lot, and TV verse Alex has had a lot less fucking over by the Department by this point too. And Rothman feels too creepy to be effectively convincing him of anything.

"I want you to meet your tutor." FUCK YES FINALLY 🙌 (may have rewound that part several times lol)

Episode 4 - Recruit

Nicaragua: 18 years ago OH MY GOD IT'S HAPPENING

Baby Yassen is adorable, I'm in love.

OH MY GOD THAT'S SO MUCH BETTER THAN THE FUCKIN SPIDER THING

OH MY GOD THE REVEAL OF HIM STANDING OVER THE SLEEPING ALEX I'M DEAD

(Ok, I'm calm again. For now. We continue.)

"You killed my uncle" - all the hundreds of ways this conversation has been written over the years and Yassen's just like lol get over it 😂 (here for it tbh)

Rothman: He's one of our best Yassen: One of? Bitch.

Yassen watching Alex train like 👀👀

"Did he ever tell you you're no fun?" Oh you want to have FUN with Yassen do you?

Yassen bitchslapping Alex to fuck, both hilarious and hot.

Oh, you want to be WET wet.

"Matteo's the guy with the blanket." Why is that so funny.

Omg Yassen stepping in to protect his boy and humiliating Nile in the process lol. And Alex doing what Yassen tells him, because of course he does 🥰

"This one is my responsibility" 🥰🥰

"What about love, friendship?" Alex has only known Yassen five minutes and is already down bad.

"Kind of lonely though, right?" Yeah, Yassen needs you at his side Alex, so step up and stop being a whiny little bitch about killing people.

Never get in the first taxi, rule one of espionage.

Yep, called it. Tom's like: I'll have my fucking tip back in that case.

This scene is so dark I have no fucking idea what's going on, I thought Nile had attacked Alex, but apparently not. Is Nile officially part of this exercise or not, it seems really unclear lol.

The power of friendship and sparklerabbits saves the day, apparently. Yawn.

Jesus, we really ATE with this ep, huh.

Episode 5 - Revenge

"Would you rather your arms around me, or my arms around you?" Way to make it creepy Tom you skeevy fuck.

"Can we focus please?" "We're multi-tasking."

Sure Grendel, rock up to the super sekkrit spy base in a massively conspicuous car why don't you?

"Yassen will give you everything you need." Oh I BET he will.

Feels sloppy them not removing the diffuser from the vent tbh.

"What does this say?" Alex hasn't inherited John's neat handwriting then lol. Alex leaning into him like that > me making noises only dogs can hear.

"You've put lockpick?" "I left my last one in Nile."

Ooh, suicide pill, nasty. Kind've pointless though, given they've been left with the evidence anyway.

Yassen in Alex's bedroom again, likely place for him to be.

"I don't want you to fail. I don't want you to die." 🥹💕🥰

Yalex roadtrip, let's goooo.

Disappointed they're not making Alex do the Entrapment infrared acrobatic sequence here lol.

If this is Yassen's idea of a date it definitely needs work.

So no surprise scorpions then? Can't have shit in Detroit Malta.

"Why? Why did she kill him?" Well taking things at face value here he was a highly murderous member of a terrorist organisation, so you know, kind've her job.

Yassen does like a casual lean, doesn't he.

Episode 6 - Target

Alex and Yassen have shacked up in London, hope there's only one bed.

Now they're in the back of a van, SO many opportunities for shagging, they're spoilt for choice.

Yassen's impressed look when Alex reels off all the security details, so proud of his boy.

"What happened to my mum?" Finally he wonders lol.

"And I'm good at it. You could be too." 🥹

"You think Alex killed him?" I mean, he was also there with a notorious assassin, so probably not, y'know.

Domestic Yassen cooking Alex's dinner and also cooking him a gun lol.

Smithers' "How I've missed you" ahahaha. Smithers/Kyra much better pairing tbh.

"He's actually quite good at this stuff." Smithers' little snort lmao

Time for Alex to be blacked up/ dunked in a teabag bath/ gussied up. Although he still looks exactly like Alex afterwards, which feels less useful lol.

"You love him, don't you?" Yassen loves him more. I have to say Alex had far more chemistry with Syl, and frankly for that matter with Tom. I really don't get the Kyra agenda.

"It's a dry hole." Alex's worst nightmare.

Is Alex going to look through Mrs Jones' knicker drawer?

Episode 7 - The Shot

Mrs Jones and her tall murderous hobbit son lol. Otto really looks about 58 here.

Hope they bill him for her fucked up fridge.

Is that Bath? Oh, it is.

Mrs Jones casually throwing Alex back into play lol. Maybe she can have a little revenge for him trying to shoot her.

"Everyone breaks into houses." Jack's face lol

Ewww put him down, you don't know where he's been (Yassen's bed, almost certainly)

"Remember they can't hurt you unless you invite them in." "That's vampires."

Yassen arguing in favour of going to rescue Alex MY HEART

"Sit down. I'm going to tell you a story. About your friend, John Rider." HOLY PLOTHOLE TIMELINE PATCHING BATMAN

"John was embedded inside Scorpia for three years." Not the only thing he was embedded in by the sounds of it.

Alex seems to be hallucinating again lol.

Yassen, maybe psychoanalysing your insane boss isn't the safest thing to be doing?

"It's quite mad Julia." Yassen really gives no shits omfg

"I know my place." Yes, at Alex's side.

I like how Julia thought telling Yassen she'd killed John would do anything other than piss him off lol.

Episode 8 - Invisible Sword

"But you do owe me a new fridge." LOLLLLLL

Crawley feeling like a spare part during this lift convo, hahaha

"Smithers, you can do me some kind of tracker, right?" "Yeah, if you promise to keep it on you this time."

Alex is like ohshit I'm gonna die fr

"Not for the agents. They undid their seatbelts." Eyyyyyyyy 👉

Aww they've given him a little baby assassin outfit, how cute.

Where's Yassen, has he just fucked off to the pub?

"For the head of Scorpia, you're a really bad liar."

Laughing at all the other Scorpia agents having to listen to this convo about their boss like we are not paid enough for this shit 😬

"Everyone else is getting what they want, let me have my cereal."

Protecting his boy to the last. Yassen really is purely on Alex's side, we love to see it.🥰

And OMG HE LIVESSSSSSSS 🙌🙌🙌🙌 (I voted yes in that poll, I had faith lol)

Well that was - far more fanservice than I dared hope for, after the meagre pickings we got in the first two series. Yalex supremacy to the motherfucking end, let's go.

[flowers-of-io]

Destinytober - Ghost

Read on Ao3 with formatting that isn't broken by the mobile tumblr app :)))

Nkechi-32 takes a deep breath, and exhales Light.

The Lost City is brilliant in the sunlight, overgrown buildings letting the brightness in through wide open windows and cracks in the ceilings. The floor is all grass, lush and green, and when she walks it feels like stepping on soft carpet—a little springy, a little uneaven, enticing her to take off the heavy boots and wade through it barefoot. Perhaps she could indulge in a little picnic, when the job's done.

Because of course there's a job. Much like Micah, to have sent her out Ghost-hunting when she'd barely arrived. Nkechi refocuses her optics as Agu flicks through the sensors on her HUD, trying to lock in on their target, but there is so much Light here it's near impossible to track down a single errant signature.

"I think I got something," he informs, and Nkechi sees it too—a speck of yellow on the heat map, some fifteen metres away from them and approaching. She turns the corner just as Agu says, "Wait, the signature doesn't ma—"

"Hi there!"

"Whoa!" Nkechi takes an abrupt step back, barely avoiding bumping head first into something small and violet. She didn't account for how fast the Ghost was moving.

"Oh, sorry!" It draws back as well, and she can see its shell now: Reef-made, delicate metal cut into shapes like flower petals and glazed over. It is strikingly familiar.

"Pulled Pork?" She laughs in disbelief. "Whatcha doin' here?"

"Nkechi!" he chirps, and cartwheels in the air. "We're patrolling! Oh, and by the way, my name's Glint now!"

"I take it this means you've found your Guardian," she says with a smile.

Agu emerges from his hiding spot and gives the other Ghost a good-natured nudge. "Did you find them on some asteroid?"

"Nope!" Glint cartwheels again, then stops and narrows his optic in thought. "Actually, the Dreaming City is technically built on an asteroid, so I guess it counts...? I don't know. Especially now with the curse and everything."

He is still talking when a shadow drops down from the rafters behind him, landing on two legs and then unfurling into a cloaked figure. With her instincts honed over centuries, Nkechi doesn't even flinch.

"You weren't joking about people calling you shredded meat, huh." The Hunter pushes their hood back and extends a hand to her. "You're Glint's friends, I take it?"

"These are Nkechi and Agu!" Glint says before any of them can reply. His voice gains an almost ceremonial tone when he adds, "And this is Crow, my Guardian."

Nkechi doesn't meet her Ghost's eye, but she can feel the look he is giving her. She shakes Crow's hand instead, and lets Glint ramble on.

They actually saw the missing Ghost, he tells her, a few hours ago by the eastern edge of the city. Crow offers to help track it down. He is quite nice, Nkechi thinks; his countenance seems to be in a state of constant battle between the natural Hunter confidence and the sheepishness of young Guardians in conversation with someone much older. They make quick work together, and she has to admit, he's not half bad a scout, even if Glint almost ruins their cover by chattering like a wound-up toy right in front of a flock of Husks.

Later, after escorting the wayward Ghost to Micah, Agu and her sit together on one of the Tower balconies and watch half the sunset, half the buzzing courtyard below.

"You know," he says, "that's not really what I pictured when I said he might find the greatest Guardian of all time."

"What, a prince of the Reef?"

"A Hunter Vanguard."

Nkechi laughs. "With how well filling that position had been going for the past few years, the odds really weren't in his favour."

"You think they're a good match?"

She looks down at the black-and-white Hunter leaning against the kiosk and chatting with a Legionnary. Glint is a tiny splotch of purple in the folds of his cloak, nestled against his cheek.

"Yeah," she says with a smile, and pulls her own Ghost closer. "Almost as good as we are."

[hanniebanggi]

a cat date with jun

》 death, murder, animal cruelty, yandere(?)

》 idk what came to me. but this jun nylon china 2023 photoshoot gives american horror story vibes so i wrote this.

》 not proofread.

you've been in a relatioship with junhui for 5 months, and you can say that you know him pretty well.

his colleagues call him weird and strange but that's just him. your junhui. he made you fall in love with him with his weirdness.

he likes cats, he orders alot of cat related items, phone case, plushies, clothes and mugs with cat designs in it.

he like watching horror movies, well, its not like you're a scaredy cat but the things he watches are different. most of them look real.

but despite all those weirdness, he is very sweet and loving to you. he knows everything about you even though you two have only been together for 5 months.

these days, junhui seems, you dont know. weirder? out of it?

he hasn't been paying attention to you these days but you understand that, he's a dentist, so patients' well being comes first.

so, when he asked you to have a date at home with him, you immediately said yes.

"i'm sorry, i wasn't able to pay much attention to you. things just keep on happening these days..." junhui said as he puts a plate full of thin sliced meat down as he prepares the electric grill.

"its okay, jun. i understand, and you message me, you update me. that's enough for me. by the way, where's moon?"

junhui sighed

"also, that. my cat, moon died. so, i was out of it. i didn't know what happened, when i came back he was outside the house and his neck was mangled, looks like he was eaten by some animal."

"baby.. come here." you said as you hugged him. you removed his glasses so you could hug him properly as you two just stayed like that for a minute.

moon is junhui's third cat. and its dead. just like his past pets.

he had a ginger cat back then at the start of your relatioship but it drowned, he said, when you two were out of town.

then a white munchkin cat that he adopted, but it died, you found it outside his lawn, stomach was open and the guts were out.

and now, this.

"it must've been hard for you. im sorry, baby."

"thank you." he said as he pulled away from your hug and kissed your forehead as he went back on his seat to start grilling.

"we're about to eat. im sorry, i bought it up." he said, and you assured him that its fine.

after he cooked almost every portion of the meat you two started eating.

"hm! this is good, junnie." you said as you savor all the flavors.

"i was hoping you'd like it. i worked hard for it." junhui said as he looked at you with a gentle smile on his face.

"i never tasted anything like this, its chewy but also melts in your mouth? i don't know how to describe it."

"but its delicious, isn't it?" he said as he puts his chopsticks down and crossed his legs as he watch you eat.

"uh huh. what's this? and the marbling is good too. is this pork? beef? wait, lamb?"

"it's cat meat."

junhui said as he smiled before pushing his glasses back properly to bridge of his nose.

"w-what? don't joke like that!"

his smile faded as he leaned in.

"i worked hard for it, baby. why would i joke about things i worked hard for?"

junhui's gaze changed.

you laughed at him as you looked at him carefully.

"o-oh! i still have an appointment with my dermatologist. i have to g-go." you said as you stood up from your seat.

"no, i think you should seat down."

"didn't you want to have a bonding time with me? a date? i worked hard for this, baby. i worked hard for months to keep moon plump and healthy. and you like it, right?"

"so, sit down and eat. we have more activities to do for our little date."

he smiled and kissed your cheeks. he pulled your seat as he guide you to sit down again.

you held your breath as you sit down, your face getting pale and your hands shaky.

"atta girl."

[red-dead-reloaded]

John Marston's Wild West Comedy Tour

Our main gig: Chapter 1: The PLAN

And our side hustle: Shootin' Down the Fourth Wall

THE TRUE STORY:

It starts off with a conversation around the campfire after a botched robbery. John's telling the tale to pass the time, and I hit him with:

"Hey, you've got material there!" He blinks a few times, because he never thought about it that way. But he has a think about it...

"Damn, you're right!" So we leave the gang, shit's going south, anyway, but John can't swim, which doesn't leave us with much room.

The road's long, the law's tight - we're looking for something better. No more robbing trains - we're robbing people of their SERIOUS faces and selling them some good old laughter. THE COMEDY TOUR BEGINS! The name of our act: The Good, the Bad, and the Goddamn Outrageous

First stop? We head out West, hitting up the towns that have never seen a comedy show in their life. We don't just show up with jokes, we rob 'em blind (of their funny bones).

We start performing anywhere where there's a crowd - saloons, campsites - folks out here want a good laugh as much as they want a good shootout. But the road to Vegas ain't easy. We get ourselves into some WILD shit along the way.

We run into Arthur Morgan who's decided to strike it out on his own too. He begrudgingly joins us as the third wheel. We keep him JUST grumpy enough to get him to pull out his best one-liners.

FINALLY - VEGAS! Yeah, baby!

By now, we've made it big. The competition is stiff, the eyes of the world are on us. We're used to people wanting to take us down, but by now, we're feeling pretty untouchable. On the night of our big performance, we're having a blast, the audience is laughing so much they could bust a steam engine.

BUT good old Edgar Ross comes along and derails all the fun - trust that man to rain on John's rodeo. He wouldn't know a good joke if it shot him in the face. Problem is, as much as we've been making a name for ourselves as comedians, we've also drawn the attention of the law. HOW ARE WE GONNA GET OURSELVES OUTTA THIS ONE, JOHNNY BOY? John Marston and Arthur Morgan team up to give Ross the public ROASTING OF A LIFETIME. You gonna pull a slick one about John's mama being a prostitute? Be prepared to become ROAST PORK, my villanous bro. Comedic vengeance, retribution of the sweetest kind, is within our grasp. The crowd's going to remember the day they witnessed this epic lampooning from the two greatest outlaw-turned-comedians this side of the Mississippi!

Ross won't be able to hold a candle to Arthur and John, and when it's all said and done? They walk off the stage like the kings of comedy they were meant to be.

Ross will forever rue the day he thought he could punch down on poor John about his mama. The three of us? We'll be Legends of the West. Not for our robberies, not for our wanted posters - but for bringing down the goddamn house with every line.

[bengiyo]

At 25:00 in Akasaka Ep 4 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Shirasaki struggled to build the emotions for his character in the love confession. He begged for another opportunity, so the crew agreed to try again the next day. Hayama went over to Shirasaki's place unannounced, cooked, flirted, and cuddled this man so gently to get him to talk about things he likes. This built to an excellent moment where Shirasaki built the feelings he needed for the character at the same time as his burgeoning realization that he likes Hayama.

I am excited to spend time with Shirasaki sorting his feelings. It's totally normal to get complicated feelings for your costar when you have to believably perform attraction to a version of them.

That braised pork looks so good.

GOOD NEWS, FELLAS: WE ARE USING THE BIG TV!

I so appreciate that Hayama knows that Shirasaki needs specific positive feedback on his performances.

This kitchen is reminding me of Kohinata and Wataru's place. Pretty sure it's the same place.

This dough scene is very sensual.

Welcome back, Baby is a Messy Eater. Love the show quickly flashing back to the kiss with a heartbeat backing it to make sure we get what that has always implied. Bonus points for there still being sauce on his face after.

Yes, show me the audience loving Shirasaki's performance before that snake supporting actor comes back to start negging again.

I think this is Hayama's manager? I'm glad someone told Shirasaki before that other dude.

Aww his manager is getting emotional. I wonder if he felt like he believed in Shirasaki but wasn't sure how to make others see that.

Baby boy can't enjoy his regular restaurant anymore without getting too much fan attention, and now he's getting weird messages. Let my boy live!

The actors playing the interviewers are doing a great job. Shirasaki has a standoffish nature that's hard to break through.

I'm glad we're doing this story in an industry that is still making the show while it's on air. I am excited to see how the reception affects the filming process.

Oh nooo. The curry doesn't taste right, and the blow dryer feels wrong. They led into this by mentioning loneliness and then delivered. Good job, BL.

They even muted the colors on screen to double down on it!

Oh, I like this hug.

I love this show for immediately complicating this scenario with an interloper right as Shirasaki was about to fall into his own spiral. I'm so excited to see how Hayama reacts to this.

This show is really feeling stronger to me as it goes on. We made comparisons to I Became the Main Role in a BL Drama for obvious reasons, but the shows are really distinct for me at this point and I really love the work being done here. I'm really impressed.

[cc-cobalt-1043]

Barbecue:

One summer evening on Pabu The bad batch were heading to Shep's house, he was hosting a barbecue and had invited everyone.

The kids were practically pulling the adults along in their excitement.

"Cmon dad, we've been walking forever." Joey whined giving Cobalt an almighty tug forward.

"We've been walking for two minutes bud." Cobalt said as he was almost pulled off his feet.

"Yeah, forever, we're gonna be late at this rate." Joey said.

"Relax Joey, we won't." Cobalt said.

Just minutes later they arrived at Shep's where the man greeted them with one of his signature smiles.

"Hello friends, glad you could make it." He said.

Shep looked to the kids.

"Lyana is in the backyard if you want to see here." He added.

Shep quickly stood aside as the kids and Batcher charged through the door.

Laughing heartily the adults followed through the door and went into the garden where the kids and Lyana were already engrossed in conversation.

Soon Wrecker and Shep had gotten the barbecue started and a smoky smell had now enveloped the garden.

Daniel and James were chasing batcher around the garden, Boba, Zander and Rowan were talking with Mox, Stak and Deke about different ships they had seen and flown and Omega, Kordi, Cynthia and Lyana were sitting together having a whispered the silence interrupted by their frequent giggles.

Other guests soon arrived including Rex and several clones from the rebellion, Riyo Chuchi, Emerie, Phee and to everyone's surprise Rampart along with Jax, Sami and Eva.

"Hello Edmon, glad to see you." Shep said.

"It's a pleasure Shep." Rampart nodded before going and sitting next to Emerie while Jax, Sami and Eva went to the other kids.

Soon Shep, Wrecker and Gregor announced that dinner was ready and the kids eagerly ran over, even batcher and Lucky got a plate of food each. After the kids had been served the adults got their share of food and everyone dug in.

"Good as ever Gregor, you continue to impress." Rex said after a mouthful of fried porg.

"Oh Rex you honey dripper Gregor giggled pretending to blush.

Rampart took a bite of a pirg wing and he suddenly started gasping for breath.

"...To hot.." He gasped out.

Crosshair handed him a bottle from the cooler which Rampart took a large drink from.

"Can't handle your spices Edmon." Crosshair teased.

"Usually I can, but that was spicy even by my standards." Rampart said.

"Sorry about that, that must have been one of my fireball wings." Fireball piped up.

"What's the difference?" Rampart asked.

"They're much spicier than normal porg wings, that's how I got my name, cause I love spicy food." Fireball said.

"I see." Rampart nodded taking another drink of water.

Daniel was typing away on his tablet while chewing away at a pork chop with a healthy amount of apple suacce on it.

Nemec sat down next to him.

"Whatcha working on Danny?" He asked.

Daniel swallowed his food and wiped some sauce off his chin before awnsering.

"My own starfighter, I'm hoping to build it one day, once I'm old enough to do so anyways." Daniel said.

"Can I see?" Nemec asked curiously.

Dan nodded and passed Nemec the tablet.

Nemec whistled impressed.

"That's a nice looking fighter, I'd hate to be on the wrong end of that." Nemec said.

Daniel nodded his thanks blushing slightly with pride.

Sunset was approaching and by now the younger kids were getting tuckered out.

Sami, James, Lyana and Omega were passed out against Batcher who was curled up on the grass.

Eva had crawled onto Rampart's lap half an hour ago and was out cold, head resting against her adoptive father's chest.

Rampart was chatting with Martha along with Daniel who was fast asleep on his mother's lap similar to Eva.

Cynthia and Katie were chatting, about something funny, the two giggling on occasion.

Boba, Jax, Zander and the triplets were huddled together talking in low voices while nearby Kordi read a book with Rowan lying across her lap fast asleep.

Meanwhile Tech and Phee reatreted too the roof where the two watched the setting sun.

"It really is beautiful isn't it?" Phee asked.

"It most certainly is." Tech nodded in agreement.

The two shared a kiss together as the sun set and the others had fun.

[those70scomics]

Fictober Day 3: "I know you better"

That '70s Show Fanfiction

Fez had finished tempering chocolate in his industrial kitchen at home. He was trying out a recipe he created for Halloween candy. Rhonda designed packaging, and he hoped the manufacturer would deliver it in time.

The molds he'd designed himself months ago. He poured chocolate into them and slid the tray into his refrigerator. The pumpkin- and gost-shaped candies needed twenty minutes to set. It should go well, but his insides were melting with anxiety.

He wiped his sweaty hands on his apron, and Rhonda shouted, "Cocoa Puff!" Rhonda behind him. He stumbled from the refrigerator to her arms. "I'm sorry," she said and positioned him upright. 'I forget that you disappear into a different world when you're working."

"Yes. I did not expect you back for a half-hour."

"It's already past two. I'm starving!" She grasped the refrigerator handle, but he shouted at her to stop. "What's wrong?"

He grabbed frozen pork chops from the freezer. "Wrong? Nothing is wrong."

"I know you better -- and your voice is two octaves higher than usual."

He put the foil-wrapped pork chops into a pot, placed the pot in the sink, filled the pot with hot water, and weighed down the pork chops with a ceramic canister. "They will be defrosted before your hunger devours you."

She cupped his chin and pecked his lips. "Thanks. Now what's devouring you?"

Ah, his mashed potato was so perceptive. He wouldn't know what to do without her, and that was the problem. Her parents had discovered oil on their Mississippi dirt farm, taking them out poverty to the rich life. They were the real Beverly Hillbillies, except they had remained in Mississippi.

"I'm worried my candies will not be good enough for Miss Kitty's Halloween party."

Rhonda laugh-snorted. "It's only October third. You've been working on this candy for a month and have another month to perfect them. So what's actually bothering you?"

Fez glanced around the industrial kitchen. Their house in Kenosha was bigger than he believed he would ever live in. "What am I offering you?"

"Fez -- " she gestured to the sink -- "you're making me lunch."

"Ai, that is not enough! You're getting a PhD in kinesiology ... did I pronounce that correctly?" She nodded, and Fez continued. "Your career will help people. Becoming a chocolatier will make me happy. I hurt you to make me happy, too, but you forgave the unforgivable."

He ripped off his apron and tossed it to the floor. His life was a sham.

Rhonda picked up his apron. "Hey, that was over a decade ago, and you were under a bad influence."

"Do not use Casey Kelso to excuse my behavior. I am a horrible, horrible man."

"What's bringing all this up now? I don't get it. We're happy. Having a career that makes you happy will help other people. Remember Willy Wonka -- the movie version." She held his apron to her chest and sighed. "Gene Wilder is so sexy in it."

"Yes, he is. I suppose ... well ... " Fez ran his palm over the cold granite counter top. "Halloween is our favorite holiday -- and the anniversary of when we reconciled. This year, it feels more important than ever."

Rhonda slipped the apron over his head and embraced him. "Mr. and Mrs. Forman basically said it is. They've recruited all of us for her party. Even Kelso, Brooke, and Betsy, and they live in Chicago! We're only in Kenosha."

"And Jackie and Hyde live in Milwaukee. Perhaps the pressure is bringing up feelings I have not completely dealt with."

"We're gonna turn thirty next year. We have a lot of plans. I can't be your shrink. I can only tell you that I love you and want us to stay together past when you've gone bald and I've gotten arthritis."

She tried to kiss him, but Fez gasped and stepped backward. "I am not going bald! My father still has his hair."

"Gray, then." She attempted to kiss him again, and he let her. "I've got contacts at my university. I'll get the number of some shrinks for you ... if you're willing to try therapy."

"I'm willing to try anything as long as it means I can enjoy everything we have together."

She clasped his shoulders tightly. He winced, and her grip loosened. She had become better at assessing her own strength but not perfectly, and maybe that was the answer. Unlike chocolate, tempering his guilt did not have to be a perfect process. It could not be by its very nature. He was human, not candy.

Although he wouldn't mind being candy if Rhonda were the one who ate him.

[dollsonmain]

Ok, so...

Manager started a notebook and told us to write down what we need to order in the notebook, so I've been doing that.

I add things as I become aware of it being needed.

Today I wrote in something I'd asked for repeatedly (pork BBQ rib patties/McRibs, basically, which I suspect she only saw "BBQ pork" and stopped reading and that's why we have so many tubs of bbq pulled pork in the freezer....) and she was like "Make sure you tell me what you need by Mondays because the order goes in on Tuesday.

I was like "Ok..."

She can just order all that stuff on the next Tuesday... Next... Next week... Does she want me to not write things down UNTIL Monday???? Or write them as the week goes by and I become aware they're needed like I had been??????? Like wh...... The latter is more efficient?

I had asked for that repeatedly? There are 2 left (2 rib patties in a huge box in the freezer.......) and they won't sell by the time Monday rolls around again either way but... I did ask previously for that product.

Like, we stood there and had a conversation about them. We had lots of sub rolls expiring soon, and she had previously said she didn't want to order more rib patties because they weren't selling, so I suggested we put the rib patties into the sub rolls [because we normally slap them on burger buns and they look ridiculous because the bun covers about half the patty in the center and they really should be on sub rolls] and then heat them up and put them in the hot case, because people like to buy them out of the hot case and then be done with them. And she was like "Oh well they kind of took off..." and I was like "That's because I've been putting them in the hot case." They really do sell out of there, but not out of the cold case, and the same goes for the buffalo chicken with pepperjack. No one wants that cold, but when they're warm, people snatch them up.

I........

This week we have one tub of chicken salad that is brand new, I opened it yesterday, it expires today, and I was expected to make tons of little chicken salad sandwiches out of it, but if I do that then I have to throw it all away tomorrow and that seems a waste of bread, which we're always out of. Not that it's the right bread. It's "white wheat" bread which is just bread made with whole wheat flour that's been ground down finely.

She bought some burger buns at a store to make sandwiches with today and they all expire today.

I just.......

How has no one noticed this was happening??????? Like, NO one thought to check expiration dates?????? The past FOUR YEARS?

I'm so confused.

Me checking expiration dates has definitely opened her eyes to some issues, though. She's rearranging sections of the store, now, implementing pseudo-plan-o-grams in places that it's easy to do that like the automotive stuff and paper goods, things that don't move fast, to make reordering things easier, etc. but she's not THERE, yet, and the inventory is still all wrong.

I also saw her drawing a diagram for the Monster energy drinks so she's certainly looking at things a little differently, lately.

I'm still not sure if I can say to her "I know how to set up and manage a micro-warehouse because I have one in my basement. If you set me loose, I can get this all sorted, but everyone has to be on board and maintain the system for it to work and save you lots of trouble and money over time." because she is head strong and it would cost some money, AND she's just Manager. Everything has to pass by Owner, too, and he's not seeming too flexible.

And also that's not my job, my job is "cashier". I'm already doing way more than my job. I get paid $12/hr. That's nothing compared to the amount and variety of work I do. But the kind of person that I am, if given this Thing that needs fixed, omg let me fix it, just like how I've been pulling out fixtures that haven't been moved in ages and cleaning under and behind them and now she has the other employees doing stuff like that later in the day, too.

I am definitely shaking things up in there, and still not sure whether it's a good thing or a bad thing. It's good for the store, certainly, in general. It's bad for the bottom line in the moment because they're suddenly having to liquidate expired stuff left and right because I go find it when I'm bored (all the more reason to not let me get bored, I guess), and that's showing Manager and Owner how inefficient the inventory and ordering is. I'm sure it's frustrating af for the both of them to have someone come in and be like "Wow, all of this is wrong."