Kintsugi
Y/N and Wade have been married for several years now, and Wade is feeling extra sappy when Y/N announces she's pregnant for the second time with a second little girl. Wade reminisces on how Y/N, a former scientist, was able to save Wade all those years ago from the biggest threat he ever had: himself.
Warning: Lewd language and talk about sex and pregnancy. Reader discretion is advised (this is a Deadpool x Reader...obviously this rating is Mature at minimum...)
The scientist eventually got dressed and went downstairs to search for some food, a little anxious about how she was supposed to tell Ellie about the fact she wasn't going to be an only child anymore. Wade and Y/N's daughter, Ellie, had just turned nine years old and the couple had decided now was a good a time as any to add a new face to the family.
Wade followed her downstairs, his bare feet padding against the floor. "Hey, peanut? You okay?" he asked, noticing her tension. He leaned against the counter, watching as she rummaged through the fridge. "You're thinking about how to break it to Ellie, aren't you?"
"I am, yeah." She nodded pensively, reaching into the fridge and grabbing the whipped cream. She squirted some into her mouth and sighed, then turned back to look for something else in the fridge.
Wade chuckled and shook his head.
"You're really going to use whipped cream as a coping mechanism, huh?"
He pushed off the counter and walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind.
"Hey, maybe I can help you come up with a plan. You know, we are married for a reason. Or is that lil ring on that finger worthless now?" Wade joked, holding up his own hand to show his wedding band. It gleamed in the soft sunlight, making Y/N relax slightly upon seeing it.
"You're right, Wade. I'm sorry. I just...I dunno...what if she gets mad? Is all...'waah, you guys are totally ruining my life!' Or something..." The woman found some stuff to make a ham sandwich and grabbed it, setting down the whipped cream in the process. She shut the fridge door with her hip and walked over to the kitchen counter to start assembling her lunch.
Wade's arms tightened around her waist as he leaned in close, his voice taking on a soothing tone.
"Ahahahaha, peanut, you're thinking about this all wrong. Ellie loves us both, and she'll adjust to the new addition just fine. And if she doesn't...well, we'll deal with that when the time comes." He nuzzled her ear. "Besides, I've got a plan. We can make it fun! We can have a family meeting and explain everything together." Wade offered, which made Y/N relax slightly.
"How soon should we do this? We have no idea if it worked today. For all we know, we might have to keep trying to get me pregnant. After all...they taught us in high school that getting pregnant a second time was so much harder than the first time, Wade..." she rambled nervously. Wade gave her a lopsided grin, finding her as adorable as the day they first met.
Wade's grip on her waist relaxed, and he let out a deep sigh. "Yeah, yeah, I know all about the stats and stuff. But we're not gonna worry about that right now. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." He pulled back and looked at her with a serious expression. "Let's just focus on enjoying this moment for now. We've got our little bundle of kickass growing inside you, and we should be celebrating that! The second addition to the Deadpool family! Hot damn, I'm like Bruce Wayne collecting kids here!" He joked.
"But we don't actually know yet...we only just tried less than an hour ago...what if it didn't take?" She frowned, finally finding making a sandwich. She offered it to him, opting to make another one for just herself if he accepted the lunch. Wade graciously took the sandwich and watched as she grabbed him a plate from the cabinet behind her, giving her a silent 'thank you'. She smiled, then sighed as reality crashed back down onto her.
Wade's face lit up with a mischievous grin as he bit into the sandwich, groaning happily at how good it tasted.
"Ahahahaha, peanut, you're so worried about it not taking that I think we need to celebrate either way," His blue eyes sparkles with amusement as he continued. "Win or lose, we're having fun today. And if it didn't take...well, we'll just have to try again soon, won't we?~"
"I guess you're right. It not working just means more sex for the both of us, huh?" she smiled slightly, working on making her own sandwich quietly. Y/N giggled at how Wade hopped up and down excitedly, his sandwich gripped tightly in his hands.
Wade's eyes lit up with excitement as he nodded enthusiastically. "Oh, hell yeah! More sex is always a good thing in my book. And who knows, maybe we'll get lucky and it'll take on the second try," He chuckled to himself, taking another bite of his sandwich. "But even if not, I'm happy to keep trying...for science."
"Hmm, I think you just miss me and all the hot, raunchy sex we used to have before we became parents, don't you?~" Y/N giggled. "We both became so busy what with you being a dad and becoming more of an anti-hero and me switching jobs to stay at home with El."
Wade's face turned bright red as he coughed, trying to play it cool. "What? No way, peanut! I just...I mean, yeah, okay fine. You're right. Being parents is awesome and all that jazz, but let's be real...we used to have some crazy hot times in the bedroom," He winked at her mischievously. "And I'm not saying we can't get back to those times now that Ellie's getting older."
"So you dig the mom bod?" she asked self-consciously. Wade nodded eagerly.
"Uh, a doy, my little MILF. Of course I dig the mom bod, sugar tits. You always looked bangin' but the way you got all curved up makes me hard as a rock God DAYUM." He flirted, spanking her ass playfully. Y/N yelped, her face turning bright red in response.
"Wade, knock it off..." she laughed, clearly flustered.
"Why should I, pookie bear? I'm just giving you some good ole fashioned Wade Wilson luvins! I wanna make my dear wifey feel better, and what better way than doing what I do best? Being a vulgar and annoying asshole to her?" Wade grinned, the smile almost reminiscent of the Cheshire Cat from Alice In Wonderland. Y/N rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but smile.
"There's that smile, firecracker! I love having such a sexy wife all to myself! Not once have I wanted anyone else as soon as you strutted your way into my life, pretty girl." Wade flirted, lightly spanking his wife's ass again and howling obnoxiously like a wolf. Her eyes sparkled with amusement as she playfully tried to swat at Wade's hand, but he was too quick and continued to tease her. She let out a little squeal of delight as he spanked her ass, feeling a rush of excitement course through her veins.
"Oh, stop it! You're making me blush!" She laughed, trying to maintain a stern expression while secretly enjoying all the attention.
"Nuh uh, no. I vowed to make you feel good today, and that means I gotta get those feels back up to the good status." He whispered, moving behind her and cupping both her breasts. He softly massaged both, feeling her melt slightly against his warm hands.
"That's it, baby. Let me take care of you today. I wanna make today all about you. You've done so much for our family and have always been there for me, even when I was a blabbermouth of a Merc. Yet you always seemed to see the good in me. You remember that talk we had all those years ago? About the kintsugi thing?" He asked, his voice turning to a low rumble as he continued to massage her breasts. She sighed and leaned her back against his chest, relaxing even more as they stood together in the middle of the kitchen. The sunshine illuminated her hair, making it even more shiny as it framed her face just right.
"Yeah, I think so. Something about us fixing each other like the kintsugi concept, yeah?" Y/N asked tentatively. Wade nodded, kissing her neck softly.
"You're a damn good scientist, baby. Never let that go, okay? You always talk big shit about me being an anti-hero now...but you're really the one who deserves more praise. You saved my life. If it wasn't for you, I'd still probably be semi-homeless, addicted to drugs and addicted to meaningless relationships as a merc. You saw someone so genuinely fucked up and decided...'I want that one'. And dammit, I can't lie, your stubbornness really came in handy this time." Wade chuckled softly, a warm smile on his lips. "Plus, that serum you made all those years ago gave me my looks back. Now our daughter has a normal looking dad and never has to know what I looked like before. And yeah, you didn't mind when I was all mutated and cancery, but I did, peanut...I did...cause why would such a goddess like you want anything to do with some freak like me...?" He hid his face against her back. Dammit, he hated being vulnerable, but he knew Y/N needed to know the truth. Over the years he had become a lot more sappy thanks to her.
Her eyes welled up with tears as she felt Wade's words wash over her. She wanted to hold him close, but he continued to hide his face against her back.
"Wade, stop it," She whispered, trying to keep her voice steady. "You're being ridiculous...I loved you then and I love you now. You were never a freak to me...you were always my broken thing of beauty." She smiled softly, feeling a lump form in her throat.
"Oh come on...let's face the music, Y/N. I don't think life would be as good or even as easy if I didn't look like my old self again...you really gave me a whole-ass second chance, babe. You brought me back to life and screamed in my face 'YOU MATTER' until eventually you got me believing it, too. That's damn impressive if you ask me. You...managed to fix the Merc With A Mouth." Wade moved to stand in front of her and cupped both her cheeks with his hands, causing her to look up at him and set down her sandwich on the counter.
Y/N's eyes sparkled with tears as she looked up at Wade, her voice barely above a whisper.* "You're making me cry again, dammit," She whispered, her voice trembling with emotion.
"But you know what? I don't care. Because when I look at you...I see the man I fell in love with. The one who was broken and lost, but still had so much heart. And that's what I fixed...not just your face." She smiled softly, wiping away a tear from the corner of her eye.
"How the hell did a devil like me get an angel like you, sweet stuff?" Wade laughed, voice heavy with emotion. Damn, now HE wanted to cry a little. Fuck, being a husband and father had made him go soft. Whatever, it's not like he needed to be overly cocky at the moment, anyways.
"You're no devil. You just needed someone to talk to. Someone to actually listen to the shit you were saying. I don't think anyone did before, did they?" Y/N asked softly, and Wade nodded.
"When you're a merc like I was, talk was kinda cheap in the grand scheme of things, ya know? But well, surprisingly I'm happy I decided to become less of a mercenary and more of an anti-hero. Maybe the Avengers will finally take me on, yeah?" His blue eyes shined with hope as he looked at her. She smiled warmly at him and reached up to ruffle his fluffy brown hair.
"Wade, they would be lucky to have a guy like you on their team." Y/N said.
The couple embraced, swaying slowly in the middle of the kitchen. They were happy, and that's all that really mattered in the end.
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I was just listening to some sad music while thinking about q!bbh and… the eggs changed him. They saved him in a sense. All of them.
When Bad first arrived at the island he was aimless and much like Foolish, looking for the next subject of entertainment. He was only out for himself and couldn’t be bothered to lend a helping hand to anyone.
Then he was given a little egg with a top hat and everything changed. He had someone vulnerable to look out for, to provide for, and suddenly he was given purpose. All of these little eggs were precious beyond words and everything was perfect until it wasn’t.
Charlie tried to murder Dapper right in front of Bad. That was the first time Bad felt fear in a long long time then a deep sadness settled in when he learned Juanaflippa had died and that’s what sent Slime on his rampage and everything suddenly felt so much more real. The illusion of perfection broke and Bad realized, truly realized, just what Dapper meant to him.
Juanaflippa was brought back but then a hat trick of tragedy strikes and Bad is forever changed. Bad has a chance to walk Tilin home but she chooses to go with Slime who accidentally kills her. Juanaflippa chooses to stay with Mariana and he accidentally kills her - again. And Trump dies of neglect alone in an empty house. (Cc!Bad mentioned on stream a while back that the admins had asked him if he could do Trump’s tasks but Bad didn’t realize how dire the situation was- he blames himself)
Within the span of 24 hours, three eggs died and Bad could have saved each of them. This is when everything changes for Bad’s character. This is where Bad vows that no egg was ever going to die of neglect again. This is when Bad started grinding to become the richest person on the server and ensured that all the eggs had maxed out armor at all times. These eggs dying the way they did is what created the Badboyhalo we knew.
Bad created the warp plate system in the sky so he’d be able to reach just about anywhere near spawn to save an egg if they went down. He is the one who discovered the true utility of warp stones and spread that information across the server. He is the one who informed everyone of the autoeat and XP pump functions of the backpack and set up all the eggs with infinite XP so their armor would never break.
He was so incredibly damaged by these eggs dying that he turned all his hyper vigilance towards protecting the remaining eggs even if he barely knew the parents or the eggs themselves. He would never say no to someone asking for help ever again.
Bad went from selfish and out for himself to the most selfless person on the server. He was a demon seeking entertainment in the wake of eternity and transformed into a servant of the people who gave his life again and again for others without question.
Getting Dapper primed Bad for change. Dapper was the crack in the stone that allowed the walls within him to shatter when Juanaflippa, Tilin, and Trump died. Ever since that tragic day, all of the eggs became part of Bad’s family.… and now they are gone.
Dapper and their siblings brought out the best of Bad. They saved him from a cycle of chaotic indifference. And now he’s alone again. Everything he’s done to protect them has been for nothing. Everything he’s changed, the steps he took towards healing millennia old traumas… all of that was for not.
Some wounds cut too deep to heal. Even with all the progress Bad made, he still valued his entire self worth on how useful he was to others, on protecting the eggs. Every time something happened to the kids, he took it as a personal failure. When Bobby died, he blamed himself for not going with them on the adventure. Now they are gone gone. They fled. They are somewhere Bad can’t follow. He failed them. He had one job and he failed.
It doesn’t matter what happens to him now. Getting them back is all that matters. Bad’s world has lost all vibrancy and he’s physically fading away. He doesn’t notice because he can’t let himself. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is getting them back. But even if he does… it’s already too late. He failed. He couldn’t protect them. He failed.
When the eggs come back changed (hatched?) all he will see is his failure. If he lives long enough to see his babies return, will they give him the strength to come back from this? Or will their presence give him the reassurance that… it’s okay. He doesn’t need to fight anymore. They are safe now. He can let go. One last goodbye.
Fuck man. I’ve been here since the beginning. Since the second day Bad had Dapper. I’ve watched almost every single stream since. I’ve watched Bad change in real time. I’ve watched Dapper and the other eggs change him. I stayed up until 3 am watching Bad bargain with god to save his son from an unfair death. I’ve watched Bad chase desperately across the map only to arrive moments too late to find Ramon’s corpse. I’ve watched him sit silently weeping while waiting for Jaiden and Roier to say their last goodbyes. I still remember his screams for Dapper when they were killed by pillagers. I remember them stranded in the snow tens of thousands of blocks from safety with no items no food Dapper couldn’t even speak. Terrified that it could end then and there.
The fact that this whole journey has lead us here. Bad is literally dying because he failed them. He failed them in a hundred different ways but this was the big one. This failure broke him. If Bad does end up dying dying at the end of this arc… that would both be the most narratively satisfying yet heart breaking thing that could possibly happen. The eggs saved him in a million different ways. It makes sense that they would also be the death of him.
Bad’s a demon and a grim reaper so I doubt he’d stay dead but I could see Dapper and friends going on a quest to bring him back from where ever demons/grim reapers go when they die. Maybe he’ll finally get some closure from the tragedies he’s left in his wake all throughout history. Maybe he’ll get a chance to truly start over with a clean slate.
Fuck now I’m thinking about Dapper having ti live through their dad sacrificing himself for them and their siblings. We know Dapper was borderline suicidal before being taken so just… Dapper seeing themself in Bad too late and not being able to save him. Killing himself for the greater good. Dapper refusing to accept that Bad is gone and spending every waking minute researching how to bring him back by any means necessary but knowing Bad would want them to move on, to live, to live, to live.
I have no idea where Bad’s character is going. I have no idea if he’s gonna go full villain and burn the server to destroy the federation. I have no idea if he’s gonna sacrifice himself and die trying to get the eggs back. I have no idea if his grief is literally killing him and he’s acting so desperate with the knowledge that he’s on borrowed time. All I know is cc!Bad is gonna take us on one hell of a ride and I can’t wait to see what happens next.
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A long list of Clone Wars headcanons just cause
Sometimes Ahsoka will get the zoomies and how she handles that energy is roughhousing with Anakin who's more than willing to participate
It becomes a show for the 501 because seeing the small togruta tackle the lanky ass nightmare that is Anakin Skywalker to the floor is hilarious
They are both guilty of not knowing their strength so some people (cough cough Obi-Wan cough cough) caution them against it they don’t really listen tho which has resulted in some pretty hilarious injuries
One of those injuries happened when they were playing around and Ahsoka shouldered Anakin so abruptly that he fell back on him tailbone and got the wind knocked out of him she sat by his side laughing her ass off
It took her an unreasonable amount of time to realize he was in pain and when she did she started apologizing like crazy she still gets embarrassed when people bring it up and still apologizes years later
There was another time when Ahsoka turned her back to Anakin when they were roughhousing and he pushed her so hard that she almost fell off of the landing platform they were standing on
He snatched her up by the stomach while muttering “I’m so sorry” and then he started frantically checking to make sure he didn’t seriously hurt her while Ahsoka laughed so hard she swears to this day that she pulled something
Unfortunately when the laughter stopped she did realize she managed to sprain her wrist and when Anakin found he helped her wrap it
You’d think that they’d learn from these incidents but nope they still play fight like two big dogs
Even tho Anakin and Ahsoka’s place is pretty clean it’s never really quiet there’s always gotta be some kinda noise
Sometimes it’s Ahsoka’s music playing loudly in her room, sometimes it’s a holomovie in the living room, and sometimes it’s just them bickering in the kitchen
It doesn’t matter what it is it’s never truly quiet even at night there’s a small amount of noise from Anakin’s snoring (which he denies) and Ahsoka’s purring thing (which she also denies)
As crazy as it sounds the people closest to them will admit that their noise is strangely comforting
Anakin and Ahsoka are so freaking similar that it turns heads sometimes they’ll say something the other said but they’ve never heard like “This is where the fun begins”
It’s stopped Obi-Wan in his tracks before it kinda freaks him out and worries him a little bit but it also puts a small smile on his face when the duo says the same thing at the same time
They’re also able to predict how the other will react once Ahsoka was teaching the clones tricks with her saber and they broke it they felt terrible but they were also terrified about Anakin’s reaction
Ahsoka was the only calm one in the room and explained to the group that Anakin would pretend to be pissed for about an hour but then he’d “calm down” and ask for the parted to fix it and by that time rolled around she’d already have his favorite holo prepped and food from Dex’s
They listened to her with a healthy amount of skepticism and were happily surprised to find out the next day that she was right
There was another time when Anakin and Obi-Wan decided to buy Ahsoka her favorite boba to soften the blow that she wasn’t gonna go on a mission Anakin told Obi-Wan that she’d be happy for a minute before asking what happened and he was right
When Ahsoka got closer to Anakin the clones and everyone else she showed her secret passion for acting like she doesn’t know them in public when they piss her off
It worked a couple of times and one of those times Rex almost got arrested because the officer didn’t believe that they were the commander and captain of the 501st Rex didn’t blame the dude because he couldn’t prove it without Ahsoka’s help and she refused to back him up
Ahsoka finally dropped the act when the cuffs came out but she was still kinda reluctant
She did agree to take a break from that prank and she stopped doing it entirely when Obi-Wan had to bail Anakin out of jail (she bought a lot of boba for a very long time to make up for that one)
They will reference the prank occasionally by asking each other at random points in the day “Do I know you?”
Like sometimes they’ll be out and Anakin will ask “Have we met before?” most of the time Ahsoka will answer “No actually we haven’t” (this girl is wearing his cloak he’s wearing one of her headwraps and his arm is resting on her head)
Sometimes Padme will make a big deal of taking Anakin and Ahsoka out to do something just the three of them
Whenever Padme and Anakin show the smallest form of affection towards each other Ahsoka makes a big deal about gagging Anakin makes a bigger deal of “evening it out”
Like if he kisses Padme and Ahsoka gags he’ll grab her and give her a big smooch on the forehead and then like the little shit that he is he’ll whip his lips calling her greasy
She gets him back by whipping the spit off her forehead with his robes (and also backhanding him which Padme kindly ignores)
Padme will sometimes tease her too like if she grabs Anakin’s hand then she’ll link arms with Ahsoka and make a small comment like “There now you’re even”
Sometimes Ahsoka will get them both back in the moments when they check on each other first she’ll make a big deal about saying “Well kriff me I guess” even if she doesn’t have a scratch on her
Both Anakin and Padme will make a big deal about checking her for injuries with a couple of comments like “Oh my poor little padawan you have a scratch from training last night how did you cope”
I said in my first post that Ahsoka and Anakin have a playlist and I love the idea that they have different titles for them like “Obi-Wan’s least favorite playlist” “get ready to kick seppie’s ass” “the council pissed me off again” and stuff like that
It’s all in good fun but they’ll never let anyone else see those titles because they know it’ll get a good scolding from Obi-Wan
The moment Obi-Wan knew Anakin had formed an “unnecessary attachment” wasn’t some big life-or-death moment on the battlefield
In hindsight it was a pretty funny moment that was caused by Anakin’s stupidity cause he had broken a glass earlier that day and he thought he got all the pieces so he didn’t feel it was necessary to tell Ahsoka
Next thing he knows the poor togruta is gasping in pain and when he goes to check on her she’s sitting on the kitchen floor while the mother of all glass shards is sticking out of her foot
Now you might be asking “How did Anakin miss a glass shard the size of his hand?” he honestly couldn’t give you an answer but he could tell you was in that moment he realized that he forgot to restock the med kit even though Ahsoka had reminded him about it earlier that day
All Obi-Wan got to see of this was a blur of Anakin holding his profusely bleeding padawan while yelling at the top of his lungs “Move she’s bleeding out!”
No one can really blame the man for dropping everything he was doing to chase after his former padawan and they also can’t blame him for assuming the worst like her being stabbed or shot
He didn’t know what he was expecting when he walked into the halls of healing but it wasn’t an embarrassed Anakin standing over a cackling Ahsoka as the healers scolded him for causing a scene
He makes a silent note to give Anakin a small lecture about keeping his emotions under control before checking on his giggly grand padawan
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