#now do i wait for it to go on sale or
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...dude
#I need everyone to know that if Home actually fucking dies it will be bad for me. you will not be able to reach me for a month#someone might have to fly over here to do a wellness check#The man really is going “yeah its a tragedy” far too often now for me to relax#peaceful property#peaceful property on sale#oh gods just the scenarios. of Home staying with them as a ghost for the rest episodes? Only peach seeing him????#That scene of Home waiting in peach's bed in episode 1 2.0 just the super tragic edition#dome jarupat
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i posted this to Pillowfort earlier but a couple days ago i did an unfinished redraw of this older sketch from 2023 of Salesman Barry and High-rank Craig together :3 Barry had a really rough day trying to sell his gramophones and he's struggling to deal with his financial issues and pressure to uphold a family tradition, and Craig can understand how he feels as he has to work for a pretty shitty boss (cough cough brains), and his job as a scientist, while enjoyable, was partially pursued out of being pressured as well.
(the old drawing in question)
(you can't even see them properly....)
additionally: i have created a digital redraw that's still a work in progress but i thought it looked good so i'm posting it :) i have been trying a newer style from my earlier digital stuff and i think it works well with the Jetpack Joyride characters!!
the Pillowfort post has an earlier version with slightly different tears and colouring and stuff, i wanted to put a more up to date version here. also fanon Craig with colour for the first time!?!?!?!?? what!!! i like to think Craig wore a similarish kind of outfit to Runingunin when he first appears in Brains' lab in AOZ. i like to think Craig would wear a "Trust Data Not Lore" t-shirt underneath his coat loll
#barry steakfries#jetpack joyride#salesman!barry steakfries#craig the scientist#also not so fun fact about the older drawing: i do not know where it is and it might not exist in good condition anymore#very very sad :(#ACTUALLY WAIT!!! it MIGHT be in my closet!!! i just remembered a bunch of my older drawings are in there!#it might still survive! hurrah!#i may actually post a bunch of old stuff when i look through there cause some of it is very intriguing#anyway. i love salesman barry x high rank craig i think they should kiss <3#(this would obviously be within the confines of my gay fanon world)#i like to imagine that despite his bad situation barry is still very much the bundle of chaos we know and love#he's just more. ranty and upset a lot of the time. and craig is more confident than how he is now. he's more grounded in himself#imagine barry making a really dumb sales joke trying to ask craig out on their first date after being bfs for a while#it's so stupid that it works perfectly and craig is so charmed by it#he's like ''hey darl i've got some special items to sell you... i mean my items are- you're special enough to- um-''#then he's like ''..... idk where i was even going with that'' and craig's like ''that was so stupid i can't NOT kiss him''#aussie salesman infatuated with a nerd who is infatuated with a aussie salesman who is infatuated with a nerd who is-#hehehehe my silly men
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You're all going to be best friends
#still missing Entrapta Spinnerella and Netossa I think#that should be everyone??#Clawd disappeared before I could get him for Bow so I might end up not doing him :/#he wasn't in the initial plan because doing a boy didnt sound fun but now im doing the ENTIRE alliance i'm regretting not just grabbing him#oh also missing angela.... on the fence about doing her but i will use spectra if i do#og#my customs#left to right:#custom: scorpia#custom: catra#custom: adora#custom: frosta#custom: perfuma#custom: mermista#honestly im holding out hope they make g3 nefera for netossa LOL so i'll be waiting awhile before getting her#entrapta is going to be SS venus because i'm not keeping that fucking hair come on what are you doing mattel#but i want the outfit and i dont like buying the same doll twice and i love venus too much to not keep one of her base doll#spinnerella IS going to be a rebuy unfortunately unless another catty leaks before she goes on sale lol#edit: just found out EE still has clawd so i might end up grabbing him there if i do an order through them & need free shipping
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MILES ?!! Are you okay darling 😭😭😭🫠
Like those two songs and then his caption like… like 😭😭like sir your commitment issues are showing please trust in yourself and your love
#nooo why isn’t he wearing his glasses but has them on his head#Miles Kane in glasses is adorable perfection#omb tour sale#26/10/2023#who do I have to fucking fight who hurt our miles; alex where tf are you go comfort your man#yessss secured my ticket; now all that’s left is train tickets and a bed to crash in oh and a fucking 151 day long wait
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#I think that now that I’ve found swimsuits I like I’m actually going to enjoy this vacation#also I’m slowly getting over my cold so that’s a win#and beba seems to be doing better so I feel more comfortable knowing he’s going to be okay#I feel like I can finally get a little excited about this vacation#I can’t wait to take pics#I found 7 different pairs of shorts too all on sale because now it’s freezing#and dresses from my closet that I haven’t worn in a while
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Two hours. I got two hours of sleep. I’m so frustrated with myself.
Went to the ER. Everyone was very nice. They gave me an IV bag of fluids (I was dehydrated! Sad cactus!) and a little ativan (teeny dose), which was nice at the time! Just a little amount, but the (mostly) quiet room, fluids, and meds managed to relax me a lot. Could have fallen asleep if the bed was actually comfortable. Then they packed me up, gave me another little Ativan to take home for tonight, and said they’d contact my primary. Cool cool. Got some much needed food on the way home, then took the pill and got comfy. Again, smallest dosage they make, so no feeling too good. Managed to muscle past my anxiety to fall asleep, and… 2 hours. Woke up. Tried to go back to sleep. Too frustrated and anxious and I feel like crap. What should I do? Just eat a whole gummy and hope that knocks me out? For me, that feels like playing roulette. Could work, yeah. Could make me sleepy and pliable. Could also backfire and make me feel sick and extra anxious for another 5 or 6 hours. What do I do? Roll back up to the ER? “Hewwo, I woke up and I need more benzos 👉👈🥺” haha funny, but I’ve seriously been thinking about it 😑
God, I’m miserable. Been sitting outside on the porch for a bit. Not quite an hour. Needed to get out of the apartment, but tbh, nearly 4am outside isn’t doing much for me. I just feel alone. It wouldn’t help with sleeping, per se, but just someone, I dunno, hugging or holding me for a few minutes would honestly save me a little. What a mess. Oh yeah, and apparently my kidneys are going 👎👎👎 down. Bad meat. Not great test results. Not what I’m focusing on tonight. I’m a mess. Anyway, this was my update. Sorry for all the walls of text. Suppose this is mainly for me to look back on in the future, but can’t pretend it’s not at least a little validating to put this all out into the world and knowing that maybe one or two people read this and I didn’t suffer completely without recognition. Yeah…
#this is a lot of text#not really a casual read#ok ok… I can’t sit outside forever#gonna go back inside and I dunno make a hot chocolatey drink. grab some snacks#TRY to feel good even though I don’t#YES will probably get a little high#hoping that the combo of sugar. salt. and thc will give me the sleepy tools to just pass out for awhile#just a few more hours! please!#omg I was so pissed when I woke up and thought I’d slept for awhile but realized I hadn’t#’ what do you mean the last text I sent was only two hours ago? ‘#seriously. I thought I fell asleep around 11 pm but it was closer to 1am.#stupid sexy ativan. messing with my sense of time#it really wasn’t that big of a dose! I was basically a little buzzed for an hour or so each time#but the doctor was nice and straightforward with me. I just dunno tho. I’m a big guy with a history of anxiety. .5mg is weaksauce#god I’m getting anxious just sitting here thinking about trying to sleep again#it’s feeding on itself. I’m trying to rationalize this but it’s just this feedback loop.#is this my life now? I’m outside. I feel so alone. I feel like I could die any moment. in a sword of Damocles way. it’s there and waiting.#ok sitting outside isn’t helping#after 4am and yes I see cars driving by. I hear the occasional siren. but I still feel alone in the world#please tell me life goes on? please tell me we’re not really at the end here.#I always feel like I’m staring at our final days. that we’re all barely here. fucking ghost planet. waiting to die.#there’s war and hate and everything is expensive and I can’t.. I’m not a part of this world. I’m too poor and sickly and so it all seems…#like we’re on our last leg. like the final days of a fire sale. this body feels fit for the grave. this world is the grave.#I’m scared#ok like I said sitting out here isn’t helping. Ian. please stop.#yes. yes. ok. snacks and drinks and distracting tv. let’s try this again.#sorry this is a lot#I spent the last 20 minutes writing these tags and getting progressively more anxious 😬#you can ignore this#text
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started playing signalis 👍 *stumbles out of steam covered in blood*
#ive loved it for a while but didnt have the funds to get it and#now i do. or well... it was on sale and i wasnt flat broke haha#game EVER im going insane#playing it rn bc i want to wait for my new pc to do much more bg3 honestly#and im just so#im so#its so#i#hnnrfggggh#signalis#my post
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Since I apparently specialize in drawing d&d characters, this is just a PSA that Baldur's Gate 3 characters also fall into that category
#lynx thinks#baldur's gate 3#shameless self promo#commission me to draw your blorbos :3#all my friends are obsessed with the game but i dont have it so i theorize that drawing the characters might make me feel included ;w;#i still have my summer sketch sale going on#but anything more complex than a bust might actually have to wait until after my trip in a couple weeks#i have a lot to do between now and then
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me: okay we need to clean
stupid brain: i dont want to clean i only want to look at fish
me: if we clean we can get more fish
stupid brain: GO GO GO LETS CLEAN LETS GO
#petco has their tank sale rn...#got a 10 gal for a betta and a 20 long for an eventual river setup with hillstream loachies#i have a 10 gal in backup already but its got so much crust on it i think it's better off as a quarantine tank#i mean. at least if the replacement is 12$ thats like less than i bought that tank USED from a neighborhood store lol#ok wait no i think i got it for 10. but anyway. new tnak for almost the same price as an old crusty one#ive been scouring fb marketplace for used tanks and its hard finding one without some sort of drawback#anyway i listened to fish history while i cleaned im just going to use this hyperfixation to my advantage while its in the forefront#ive had aquarium hyperfixation come and go several times now so i think its safe to say itll be a recurring fixture#and therefore its safe to actually get tanks and not worry about dropping it later#this is all after a shrimp disaster...im just determined to do things better#also panicking bc i have 200000 scuds in my shrimp tank and i need something that eats them STAT#i dont mind the scuds and i dont rlly wanna just kill them but my shrimp just had a massive die off and i dont want them competing rn#my poor shrimpies ):#dont leave veggies in the tank for too long. even if they are tiny#also clean the tank BEFORE the shrimps have their babies and ur too scared to clean#also. have a backup air pump for the filter#you can see the series of events that went wrong ):#dullblogging
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laptop arrived soon I begin my forays into crimes : 3
#the mermaiden speaks#might change it but for now her name is Rainbow-Carbuncle#the question is do I wait for ffxiv to go on sale again because I need to rebuy it for PC version TToTT
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having the worst day so of course I come home only to be locked out of my house
#bc my mom likes to bolt the door#even tho she knows I’m not present#bc robberies take place in broad daylight#in the middle of a busy apartment complex#mhmm sounds legit#im literally gonna scream#i just want to go inside#take a shower and decompress but no#now i have to go sit in the fucking lobby of the leasing office#and wait until mother gets her ass up to open the door#im so over it rn#like it’s a small thing i know#but im in no fucking mood#work was fucking shit#i had several people verbally abuse me#and i had to do like two returns which weren’t even my sales but of course ppl don’t care about that#they just wanna be shitty to the first person available#and im tired and my feet hurt and i just want to fucking relax#but my mom locked me out so now#like a pathetic stray i have wander around with my tail between my legs#i am so done rn im actually gonna cry
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[numbers under the cut just for my own reference]
lol i went for the world's shortest run at the world's slowest pace* but like. considering it's been literal years i feel good? or, you know, maybe not 'good,' but like. satisfied or whatever. pleased my bribing myself worked. now i just have to do it again infinity more times! how exciting…
⸻ *like a mile and a half-ish and it took me like. 15 minutes lmao. baby div i rower!K is extremely Not Impressed but like. fuck her, sometimes you gotta lower yr standards and just. keep trudging.
#like truly it was SUCH a baby little jog#but also it was cold enough i had my gaiter over my face most of the time i was out so like. impressed with myself 4 getting over that hump#like it would have been VERY easy 2 say 'this is colder weather than i've ever run in and it's gonna get dark on me'#'let's just wait until tomorrow'#and i almost did! but then i was like 'you know what let's go do a baby jog.' and now i've been outside#and feel a tiny stupid sense of Accomplishment and also less stir-crazy! wild how that works#anyway. very boring post but like. pleased my bribing myself actually worked lol#(i got some on-significant-sale-but-still-splurgy woolly running gear recently#in hopes that it would (a) make me happy and (b) motivate me to actually use it#and like. initial success on both fronts so tentative thumbs up! now just. rinse and repeat.)#journaling#running#exercise cw
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i hate it when im slightly interested in a video game and all the reviews are like “This game sucks. this game sucks. dont play it.” like man i dont care if a game is buggy or the graphics arent the highest quality. Is it fun? Thats the only question that matters ever
#txt#game reviews are kind of making me insane recently#i feel like ppl have a reeaaaally really high standard for games now#which like. DONT GET ME WRONG . considering how most games today are like $70 or $80#normally i wait a bit for a game to go on sale unless i really really want it#but like ''OMG THE TREES IN THE DISTANCE DONT LOAD IN CORRECTLY'' dude whatever.. whats the story like?#Do u understand me . .
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Now I sit in my room anxiously for the next hour and a half waiting for tickets to go on sale, and then I drive anxiously across town too
#like fuck I’m nervous and I need to eat something but I’m nervous and that makes it difficult#also I fucking hate making plans with people that I don’t know all that well 😭😭 like yeah I know them at work but not outside of work#and also going places I’ve never been before?? to do things that I don’t do?? the social anxiety has my belly in knots#and then….. I have to show my parents that I pierced my nose and I think that’s my biggest fear about all of this#number one fear actually: not getting tickets#number two fear: me coming home with my nose pierced and having to tell them#I just got home from work and saw my dad was home and was like oh shit bc when I leave I’m gonna have to offer an explanation#but like once I have the tickets purchased then like 🤷🏻♀️ what’s my mom gonna do tell me that we’re not going#also like everyone keeps telling me I’m a grown ass adult and I can make these decisions myself#I wonder if everyone at work could see how nervous I was and how increasingly throughout the day I’ve been getting like more nervous and#more quiet but like I feel like it’s equal parts ticket sale anxiety and doing something out of the ordinary that my parents might not#approve of while I live under their roof and all that#but on the bright side my dad just left to go do something so maybe he won’t be back before I leave and I’ll just be like hey I’m leaving#um and I’m getting my nose pierced but I’ll be back soon!!#also though like a source of my anxiety right now is that I have to go pick up one of the people I’m going with and I’ve never been alone#with him not that I mean that in a bad way just an anxious way like I’m awkward as fuck#and the other girl who was maybe going with us didn’t work with us today and she seemed a lil hesitant about it and then I texted her about#what time I’m planning on going and she hasn’t responded but I’m pretty sure she read it#anyway I’m literally like buzzing with anxiety right now over getting tickets first and foremost#ALSO I’m supposed to be getting something from Amazon today and it’s not here yet plus I’m waiting on a trade to get here and I just want#it all to just be here
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today was soooo
#logbook#got up drove to work at hl. stayed for almost 5hrs. then drove to ml and stayed there for 2 1/2 hrs.#was going to work my full 6hr then drive to ml but when the delivery didnt come at abt 5hrs i was like.#if it comes now i aint dealing with this shit for an hr and then leaving thats NO time. so i trusted my gut and left lol.#turned out after all that work c and i and rven p put in its all gotta be moved inside now 😶#so. . .i may stop by tmrw after my shift and help out again.#also the store manager didnt print the right sign for one sale and not enough of a few AND i didnt ask abt printing on labels#i just. let it all go. put out the poinsettia signs. let it goooo. not worth it.#bt can help me with it finding someone to do it tmrw. OR we do it ourselves.#i do hope we got in the houseplants this evening bc then i can work on it tmrw. blah.#also idk who made the cart of $1 poinsettias but some were literally dead so.#i cant wait to eat a lil more food and then pass out. maybe shower then sleep. im so tired.
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MOOGLE TREASURE TROVE SOON AGAIN AND FUCK FUCK FUCKING HELL YEAH DUN SCAITH !!!!!
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#⋯ ꒰ა ffxiv ໒꒱ *·˚#I MISS DOING DUN SCAITH SOOOOO MUCH I LOVE THAT RAID SO MUCH IT SHAPED THE HEALER I AM NOW#first run back when i was going thru hw in free trial. we had so many WIPES it opened something in me <3#so while waiting for a sale (which finally came w the fanfest) i did a bunch of dun scaith runs tbh. it also got me the hair#i used for my wol for the loooongest time until enw !!! and it was also w a moogle treasure trove <33 i wanted that hair for so long too#fun fact but my wol lowkey is so like me fr. even w our hair preferences LMFAOOO#TIME TO DO FRONTLINES AGAIN I MISS FRONTLINES i havent done it much ever since cc released <//3#i'm a Slaughterhouse aka 1k kills btw! <3 heheheh <33 but i need like 9k more sighs i want The Hand Of Mercy.#oh bless aurum vale isn't here /j
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