#now do i wait for it to go on sale or
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Genuine question. What do I do if I like basically every single perfume sample in a set I got
#i bought the commodity fragrances exploration kit because i was so curious about all the scents#and i’m slowly making my way through them. i’m not really bothering with the paper strips; just spraying it directly onto my skin#because i want to see how long each scent is detectable on my skin; how they interact with my body chemistry etc#i mean like i have some clear favourites but there’s really only a couple i don’t care for#(book personal because it doesn’t strike me as unique; i feel like any sandalwood-based essential oil perfume would smell fairly similar#paper personal because it’s so faint as to be barely detectable; juice overall because i have something similar already)#i really like the smell of moss but it doesn’t smell like Me somehow so i don’t think i’d get a bigger bottle#milk personal is the only one of the milk line i’ve tried so far and i liked it but found it a tiny bit faint#i’m going to wear milk expressive all day tomorrow and see how it does#i got a free 7.5ml bottle of gold personal with the black friday sale and i’m So glad because i love the entire gold line so so much#expressive is my favourite but i’m really glad i have almost 10ml of personal in total#paper expressive is so interesting to me. it reminds me of a campfire#book expressive smells like the most wonderful greenhouse i have ever walked into#i haven’t gotten heavily into the bold line yet but i feel like i’m going to have to do complex equations by the end of this to figure out#what i want#right now i’m leaning towards a duo set with gold & paper expressive but that could all change#i’m going to wait til my birthday in february anyway#like i have 18 samples plus the 7.5ml bottle of gold personal which i love.. i’ll be surprised if i use everything by then#*use up everything i mean. i’ll definitely try everything at least once by then#also i want to spend my christmas money on something actually sensible#i have no such plans for my birthday money as yet#personal
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Well, I just got the platinum trophy for the Apollo Justice trilogy collection!
now what am I supposed to do with my life
#actually i still need to play the Investigations collection (and i barely remember the first game and never played the second before)#but i'm kinda waiting for that to go on sale since capcom games go on sale quite often#so uh... yeaaaaaaah... not sure what to play next#i'm empty inside now without more content of my twisted samurai husband :(#honestly i'm hoping that they do another anime—this time for AA4-6#might be smart in the lead up to a new game so people who don't want to spend 100+ hours on the games themselves can get caught up#maybe they could even salvage Monstrous Turnabout in an anime adaptation... idgaf what changes they make as long as simon is there :)#simon simon simon simon simon i love him so much#h.text#h.TurnaboutVomit
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You're all going to be best friends
#still missing Entrapta Spinnerella and Netossa I think#that should be everyone??#Clawd disappeared before I could get him for Bow so I might end up not doing him :/#he wasn't in the initial plan because doing a boy didnt sound fun but now im doing the ENTIRE alliance i'm regretting not just grabbing him#oh also missing angela.... on the fence about doing her but i will use spectra if i do#og#my customs#left to right:#custom:scorpia#custom:catra#custom:adora#custom:frosta#custom:perfuma#custom:mermista#honestly im holding out hope they make g3 nefera for netossa LOL so i'll be waiting awhile before getting her#entrapta is going to be SS venus because i'm not keeping that fucking hair come on what are you doing mattel#but i want the outfit and i dont like buying the same doll twice and i love venus too much to not keep one of her base doll#spinnerella IS going to be a rebuy unfortunately unless another catty leaks before she goes on sale lol#edit: just found out EE still has clawd so i might end up grabbing him there if i do an order through them & need free shipping
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MILES ?!! Are you okay darling 😭😭😭🫠
Like those two songs and then his caption like… like 😭😭like sir your commitment issues are showing please trust in yourself and your love
#nooo why isn’t he wearing his glasses but has them on his head#Miles Kane in glasses is adorable perfection#omb tour sale#26/10/2023#who do I have to fucking fight who hurt our miles; alex where tf are you go comfort your man#yessss secured my ticket; now all that’s left is train tickets and a bed to crash in oh and a fucking 151 day long wait
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#I think that now that I’ve found swimsuits I like I’m actually going to enjoy this vacation#also I’m slowly getting over my cold so that’s a win#and beba seems to be doing better so I feel more comfortable knowing he’s going to be okay#I feel like I can finally get a little excited about this vacation#I can’t wait to take pics#I found 7 different pairs of shorts too all on sale because now it’s freezing#and dresses from my closet that I haven’t worn in a while
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Two hours. I got two hours of sleep. I’m so frustrated with myself.
Went to the ER. Everyone was very nice. They gave me an IV bag of fluids (I was dehydrated! Sad cactus!) and a little ativan (teeny dose), which was nice at the time! Just a little amount, but the (mostly) quiet room, fluids, and meds managed to relax me a lot. Could have fallen asleep if the bed was actually comfortable. Then they packed me up, gave me another little Ativan to take home for tonight, and said they’d contact my primary. Cool cool. Got some much needed food on the way home, then took the pill and got comfy. Again, smallest dosage they make, so no feeling too good. Managed to muscle past my anxiety to fall asleep, and… 2 hours. Woke up. Tried to go back to sleep. Too frustrated and anxious and I feel like crap. What should I do? Just eat a whole gummy and hope that knocks me out? For me, that feels like playing roulette. Could work, yeah. Could make me sleepy and pliable. Could also backfire and make me feel sick and extra anxious for another 5 or 6 hours. What do I do? Roll back up to the ER? “Hewwo, I woke up and I need more benzos 👉👈🥺” haha funny, but I’ve seriously been thinking about it 😑
God, I’m miserable. Been sitting outside on the porch for a bit. Not quite an hour. Needed to get out of the apartment, but tbh, nearly 4am outside isn’t doing much for me. I just feel alone. It wouldn’t help with sleeping, per se, but just someone, I dunno, hugging or holding me for a few minutes would honestly save me a little. What a mess. Oh yeah, and apparently my kidneys are going 👎👎👎 down. Bad meat. Not great test results. Not what I’m focusing on tonight. I’m a mess. Anyway, this was my update. Sorry for all the walls of text. Suppose this is mainly for me to look back on in the future, but can’t pretend it’s not at least a little validating to put this all out into the world and knowing that maybe one or two people read this and I didn’t suffer completely without recognition. Yeah…
#this is a lot of text#not really a casual read#ok ok… I can’t sit outside forever#gonna go back inside and I dunno make a hot chocolatey drink. grab some snacks#TRY to feel good even though I don’t#YES will probably get a little high#hoping that the combo of sugar. salt. and thc will give me the sleepy tools to just pass out for awhile#just a few more hours! please!#omg I was so pissed when I woke up and thought I’d slept for awhile but realized I hadn’t#’ what do you mean the last text I sent was only two hours ago? ‘#seriously. I thought I fell asleep around 11 pm but it was closer to 1am.#stupid sexy ativan. messing with my sense of time#it really wasn’t that big of a dose! I was basically a little buzzed for an hour or so each time#but the doctor was nice and straightforward with me. I just dunno tho. I’m a big guy with a history of anxiety. .5mg is weaksauce#god I’m getting anxious just sitting here thinking about trying to sleep again#it’s feeding on itself. I’m trying to rationalize this but it’s just this feedback loop.#is this my life now? I’m outside. I feel so alone. I feel like I could die any moment. in a sword of Damocles way. it’s there and waiting.#ok sitting outside isn’t helping#after 4am and yes I see cars driving by. I hear the occasional siren. but I still feel alone in the world#please tell me life goes on? please tell me we’re not really at the end here.#I always feel like I’m staring at our final days. that we’re all barely here. fucking ghost planet. waiting to die.#there’s war and hate and everything is expensive and I can’t.. I’m not a part of this world. I’m too poor and sickly and so it all seems…#like we’re on our last leg. like the final days of a fire sale. this body feels fit for the grave. this world is the grave.#I’m scared#ok like I said sitting out here isn’t helping. Ian. please stop.#yes. yes. ok. snacks and drinks and distracting tv. let’s try this again.#sorry this is a lot#I spent the last 20 minutes writing these tags and getting progressively more anxious 😬#you can ignore this#text
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started playing signalis 👍 *stumbles out of steam covered in blood*
#ive loved it for a while but didnt have the funds to get it and#now i do. or well... it was on sale and i wasnt flat broke haha#game EVER im going insane#playing it rn bc i want to wait for my new pc to do much more bg3 honestly#and im just so#im so#its so#i#hnnrfggggh#signalis#my post
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Since I apparently specialize in drawing d&d characters, this is just a PSA that Baldur's Gate 3 characters also fall into that category
#lynx thinks#baldur's gate 3#shameless self promo#commission me to draw your blorbos :3#all my friends are obsessed with the game but i dont have it so i theorize that drawing the characters might make me feel included ;w;#i still have my summer sketch sale going on#but anything more complex than a bust might actually have to wait until after my trip in a couple weeks#i have a lot to do between now and then
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me: okay we need to clean
stupid brain: i dont want to clean i only want to look at fish
me: if we clean we can get more fish
stupid brain: GO GO GO LETS CLEAN LETS GO
#petco has their tank sale rn...#got a 10 gal for a betta and a 20 long for an eventual river setup with hillstream loachies#i have a 10 gal in backup already but its got so much crust on it i think it's better off as a quarantine tank#i mean. at least if the replacement is 12$ thats like less than i bought that tank USED from a neighborhood store lol#ok wait no i think i got it for 10. but anyway. new tnak for almost the same price as an old crusty one#ive been scouring fb marketplace for used tanks and its hard finding one without some sort of drawback#anyway i listened to fish history while i cleaned im just going to use this hyperfixation to my advantage while its in the forefront#ive had aquarium hyperfixation come and go several times now so i think its safe to say itll be a recurring fixture#and therefore its safe to actually get tanks and not worry about dropping it later#this is all after a shrimp disaster...im just determined to do things better#also panicking bc i have 200000 scuds in my shrimp tank and i need something that eats them STAT#i dont mind the scuds and i dont rlly wanna just kill them but my shrimp just had a massive die off and i dont want them competing rn#my poor shrimpies ):#dont leave veggies in the tank for too long. even if they are tiny#also clean the tank BEFORE the shrimps have their babies and ur too scared to clean#also. have a backup air pump for the filter#you can see the series of events that went wrong ):#dullblogging
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having the worst day so of course I come home only to be locked out of my house
#bc my mom likes to bolt the door#even tho she knows I’m not present#bc robberies take place in broad daylight#in the middle of a busy apartment complex#mhmm sounds legit#im literally gonna scream#i just want to go inside#take a shower and decompress but no#now i have to go sit in the fucking lobby of the leasing office#and wait until mother gets her ass up to open the door#im so over it rn#like it’s a small thing i know#but im in no fucking mood#work was fucking shit#i had several people verbally abuse me#and i had to do like two returns which weren’t even my sales but of course ppl don’t care about that#they just wanna be shitty to the first person available#and im tired and my feet hurt and i just want to fucking relax#but my mom locked me out so now#like a pathetic stray i have wander around with my tail between my legs#i am so done rn im actually gonna cry
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[numbers under the cut just for my own reference]
lol i went for the world's shortest run at the world's slowest pace* but like. considering it's been literal years i feel good? or, you know, maybe not 'good,' but like. satisfied or whatever. pleased my bribing myself worked. now i just have to do it again infinity more times! how exciting…
⸻ *like a mile and a half-ish and it took me like. 15 minutes lmao. baby div i rower!K is extremely Not Impressed but like. fuck her, sometimes you gotta lower yr standards and just. keep trudging.
#like truly it was SUCH a baby little jog#but also it was cold enough i had my gaiter over my face most of the time i was out so like. impressed with myself 4 getting over that hump#like it would have been VERY easy 2 say 'this is colder weather than i've ever run in and it's gonna get dark on me'#'let's just wait until tomorrow'#and i almost did! but then i was like 'you know what let's go do a baby jog.' and now i've been outside#and feel a tiny stupid sense of Accomplishment and also less stir-crazy! wild how that works#anyway. very boring post but like. pleased my bribing myself actually worked lol#(i got some on-significant-sale-but-still-splurgy woolly running gear recently#in hopes that it would (a) make me happy and (b) motivate me to actually use it#and like. initial success on both fronts so tentative thumbs up! now just. rinse and repeat.)#journaling#running#exercise cw
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i hate it when im slightly interested in a video game and all the reviews are like “This game sucks. this game sucks. dont play it.” like man i dont care if a game is buggy or the graphics arent the highest quality. Is it fun? Thats the only question that matters ever
#txt#game reviews are kind of making me insane recently#i feel like ppl have a reeaaaally really high standard for games now#which like. DONT GET ME WRONG . considering how most games today are like $70 or $80#normally i wait a bit for a game to go on sale unless i really really want it#but like ''OMG THE TREES IN THE DISTANCE DONT LOAD IN CORRECTLY'' dude whatever.. whats the story like?#Do u understand me . .
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Now I sit in my room anxiously for the next hour and a half waiting for tickets to go on sale, and then I drive anxiously across town too
#like fuck I’m nervous and I need to eat something but I’m nervous and that makes it difficult#also I fucking hate making plans with people that I don’t know all that well 😭😭 like yeah I know them at work but not outside of work#and also going places I’ve never been before?? to do things that I don’t do?? the social anxiety has my belly in knots#and then….. I have to show my parents that I pierced my nose and I think that’s my biggest fear about all of this#number one fear actually: not getting tickets#number two fear: me coming home with my nose pierced and having to tell them#I just got home from work and saw my dad was home and was like oh shit bc when I leave I’m gonna have to offer an explanation#but like once I have the tickets purchased then like 🤷🏻♀️ what’s my mom gonna do tell me that we’re not going#also like everyone keeps telling me I’m a grown ass adult and I can make these decisions myself#I wonder if everyone at work could see how nervous I was and how increasingly throughout the day I’ve been getting like more nervous and#more quiet but like I feel like it’s equal parts ticket sale anxiety and doing something out of the ordinary that my parents might not#approve of while I live under their roof and all that#but on the bright side my dad just left to go do something so maybe he won’t be back before I leave and I’ll just be like hey I’m leaving#um and I’m getting my nose pierced but I’ll be back soon!!#also though like a source of my anxiety right now is that I have to go pick up one of the people I’m going with and I’ve never been alone#with him not that I mean that in a bad way just an anxious way like I’m awkward as fuck#and the other girl who was maybe going with us didn’t work with us today and she seemed a lil hesitant about it and then I texted her about#what time I’m planning on going and she hasn’t responded but I’m pretty sure she read it#anyway I’m literally like buzzing with anxiety right now over getting tickets first and foremost#ALSO I’m supposed to be getting something from Amazon today and it’s not here yet plus I’m waiting on a trade to get here and I just want#it all to just be here
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#Today the boss decided to change out the sale table in the middle of the day without any warning whatsoever#then she jumped down my throat about my attitude when I expressed my surprise by saying ‘right now? where are we going to put it all?’#(for context: we have a tiny back room. I have been trying to bend the laws of physics for months to get the overstock to fit in it)#to me it was a non-issue. I was going to carry out whatever she wanted anyway because. she’s the boss.#like I’m just the peon. what the fuck am I gonna do? Say no??#but I’m apparently ‘always questioning her’ and I ‘think I can do it better than her’ and#she’s ‘been in the business longer than I’ve been alive’ (false)#she was literally lecturing me like I was some child that needed scolding. and I couldn’t leave the back room to go do what she asked#because she was blocking the way. because our back room is TINY.#I took a second to cool off after it happened and waited for the store to empty out before apologising#like I actually tried to say ‘I’m sorry it wasn’t my intention to question your efficacy as a businesswoman’#but she just kept cutting me off every time I tried to get through the apology. wouldn’t even accept or acknowledge the apology#just ‘NOPE. NO. IT’S OVER. IT’S DONE. NO HARD FEELINGS. NO GRUDGES’#oh??? no grudges??? sure sounds like she’s been holding a grudge against me for saying anything that she feels is questioning her authority#apparently this has 'been a problem for a while' but she's been 'letting it slide'#like. um. Maybe? she should have taken me aside and. talked to me about it? LIKE AN ADULT??#Before letting it get so bad that she blows up in my face about it??#like she was actually *yelling* at me in that back room.#this kind of blowup doesn’t just happen to people who let shit roll off their back like water off a duck#how the fuck can I trust that she isn’t just harbouring some other grudge that’s going to blow up in my face randomly without warning now??#you want attitude hon? you don’t even know what attitude is#if I’m gonna be vilified for being surprised and having opinions then I’m just gonna start acting like a fucking cartoon henchman at work#I mean. I’m not paid enough to think. so I’ll just let her make al’ the decisions. even the little ones.#WHADDA YOU WANT ME TA DO BOSS?#I DUNNO BOSS WHADDA YOU TINK I SHUD DO?#WHATEVA YOU SAY BOSS#HEY BOSS CAN I GO PEE NOW BOSS#WHERE DO I GO PEE BOSS?#no fucken grudges huh?#thanks for the new grudge boss. I'll be keeping this one for a loooonnnnng time
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aaand now I dont have enough space for HSR on my laptop (65+ gb) and now I'm retired from playing again.
I literally only went back to playing (after running out of space on my ipad months ago, which prioritizes Genshin) for Jiaoqiu since his JP VA is one of my favorites (I got him to E1L0 from what I saved up) and the only thing I was anticipating was the release of Sunday, next patch. Now, I'm prioritizing Sims 4 on my laptop and which I went from 16 to 70 gb of available space.
#desiree talks#desiree plays#i spent almost $100 on dlc for the sims since there's a sale#i got seasons/get together/city living/growing together/parenthood and dream home decorator#i spend a lot of time in live mode and have aging turned off#i am waiting on aging my daughter bc i want to build a bigger house (still in the starter home across from the BFF house)#when my sim got accidentally pregnant i had to keep all the baby stuff in the livingroom/hallway#and i want to add in a pair of fraternal twin boys next#i want to pick up one or two more things (at most $15) before the sale ends and#im debating between spa day(I literally just want to see sims do yoga at the gym)#crystal creations wedding stories and moschino for making new wedding rings and taking wedding photos for my sim (yeah yeah ikik)#or like paranormal and werewolves for the build/buy and CAS over the actual gameplay lol#or i can just buy some CAS kits and go ahead in making over each one of my townies#i swear to god they are so bad#like theyre either deathly pale or super dark there is rarely any inbetween skin tones#like i used a mod to generate more than one bartender at a karaoke bar#and they all had the same two skintones (only one was super pale) and three had the same afro back to back for their shifts??#wheres the variety#and then all the japanese named sims too#i'm going to find a mod that randomizes more cultural names bc this is weird#like before i got city living i wanted more asian sims#and now there's a bunch if japanese ones#can i have some chinese korean or like vietnamese and filipino?#i guess if you have for rent that would probably help but i dont plan on that yet#i mainly want to house all the single mothers so they can raise their kids and i have more teens available#my daughter is going to need friends her age eventually
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trying to buy things to become doeboy irl on etsy and then got suspended. normal service that isn't endlessly fucking frustrating
#aria talkz#:/.#'up to two weeks' bitch i did not do anything.#IM A BUYER !!!!!!!!!! worst i ever did was have multiple accounts i guess! Bc two of them were accidents!#and now the thing i wanted on sale will go off sale and then this persons gunna have a suspended acc in their messages and get rlly confuse#lalalala. fuck you etsy#ruined my entire mood. i just wanted a deer tail.. i just wanted to be mocha irl. god fucking forbid.#btwlike week after edit. i got unsuspended in under an hour or two thank god#ill prob be depressed and upset when i get the deer tail tho bc nobody can leave me alone when i feel normal w/o going like#'hey is anybody going to traumatize this dude in the same exact way hes been traumatized 500 million times by now?'#and not wait for an answer#Literally always happens in fucking august and my birthdays in november CAN YOU PEOPLE LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE .
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