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#not that i care. i wasnt meant for this world
arsenicflame · 1 month
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genuinely. thank you so much to everyone who wished me happy birthday <3 it means more to me than i could ever properly put into words. yall made me teary more than once today 🥹
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bunnihearted · 2 months
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🦈2
#even tho it was so hard for me. ofc when u can only communicate via the internet so much is lost i think... sm extra things u need to be#more secure kinda? like physical presence does a lot on its own#but yeah.. ok i actually wrote more but u can only have 30tags per post and safari on ur phone does not tell u when it's stopping so half o#what i wrote just disappeared ._. i cant rmbr what i said... and i mean this is just for myself to vent but grr im so annoyed#yeah just that he was sm more patient than i realized. i just was in the start of learning how to live w my avpd#i wasnt able to do a lot. even if i wanted to. he helped me sm to uncover things in myself to start that thing within me#i just desperately wish i had found him earlier and that i've been this far along in my anti avpd limitation abilities.... truly wish that#so im trying to accept it and just think bc i dont have a choice :') i've never wanted anyone like this and that just is how it is#i will always love him simply bc he is who he is#he's so so cool and amazing to me in so so many ways. and i always loved just how he talks and communicates bc it resonates w me#and there are simply sm details i just adore. but yeah... i probably shouldnt think abt that? i feel like.. it isnt my place to think abt i#but it is what it is but it hurts so incredibly much. will i ever be able to let go of him? the love i couldve experienced? the wonderful#person i couldve been with? will i be able to stop thinking abt all his great qualities and how much i wish he was mine? and all the things#wanna do and talk abt with him? he's just.. he just is .. i cant describe it. it feels like more than just earthly love...#maybe i sound insane or too intense or dramatic or smth but.. it feels so much larger than everything#so i struggle sm with letting go bc i want to touch him and i want to love him and i just want to be with him and experience everything w h#but that isnt my place. i know... why.. have i only ever felt like this w him... what do i do with this?? am i crazy? am i going insane? is#there smth wrong with me?#he is worthy of everything and he is so so wonderful but is there smth wrong w me for being so..#for having love that actually truly is all consuming? what is this... it's scary. esp when i cant unleash it. it's like a wild beast i have#to learn how to tame. and i want to be able to find mutual love too. but i cant force anything. will the universe grant me that?#i cant imagine myself ever being able of letting go of him but if that is what the universe has planned then..#ok im actually starting to sound intense and weird and idk O.O i think i think too much#.. it hurts that i wont get to do all of the things and talk abt all the things i wanna do w him. i'll never get to hug him...#if i could ask for only one thing it'd be one hug from him....#maybe is ound crazy but with all my disorders and feeling disconnected from the world.. and finding someone that makes me feel tethered#and safe and real.. and having to let go bc it just wasnt meant for me... why is the universe so cruel.#in the end i care abt him so much i just want him to be loved. i want him to finally feel loved.#someone else.. someone else without avpd can do that for him. i want him to be oh so so loved and .. yeah.. :(#i wish i couldve loved him as he deserves but .. its not my place. not my place... all i want is to hear his voice and live in his arms
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wifeguycyclonus · 6 months
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Orion Pax is naive, he’s just not naive the way ppl seem to think he is
#its more like. lacking in experience outside of a certain setting#he’s naive because he hasnt interacted with a larger section of the world. with ppl who have all sorts of struggles and problems#but ppl sometimes write him as an uwu baby who will be taken advantage of if his few friends dont keep an eye on him#i personally prefer the idea that bc so much of his life has revolved around being an archivist and also being aware#that something is Very Wrong with his world#that he approaches everything with a sense of caution and care that other ppl dont take. he’s suspicious at the same time he’s gracious and#polite#actually i saw somebody say once that he’d be reserved bc of how he came to be at the archives#alpha trion plucking him out of the wilds and dropping him a secure enough middle class job#his fellows would be suspicious of him. he would be used to ppl being wary of him#and maybe that could be part of him getting along so well with megatron in those early days#orion isnt dangerous or weird to megatron. he’s just some nerd who’s good at arguing with him#i think orion would come out of his carefully crafted carefully neutral shell and become a lot more animated#he’s still a but clueless like that scene about wanting to go to an amusement park of all things#but he’s not a stupid uwu baby that big rough megatron is going to ravish at the first chance possible#hm that got longer than i meant#id make it a proper post but. im shy#anyway this is abt tfp orion if it wasnt evident#babble.tag
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vaugarde · 1 year
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been watching moonkitti vids and im like. i do appreciate her presence in the fandom if only bc she actually provides passages behind her own opinions and takes on the series, plus her being more nuanced than others, but on the other hand i feel like she gives the writers a bit too much credit
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isabelguerra · 2 years
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paranatural would be so good if the characters had intended symbolism and core beliefs and things behind them that drove a specific meaning. rather than being tools for shonen anime pseudomocking
#like all joming aside the comic is funny but thats it. its funny. its made to be funny. it has some wacky lines gets some good reactions#its funny. but i dont think its a good story anymore.#like let’s really think about this for a moment. what is paranatural about.#4 years ago i wouldnt said ‘kids fighting ghosts in their wacky hometown’ but theh havent done that in ages. theres no trace of that story#and there hasnt been since chapter 5 ended#digging further- thats just plot. what is it ABOUT? the power of friendship? the perseverance to protect the ones you love?#i used to love max for his down-to-earth straight man grounded perspective. max wasnt funny. max was reasonable and the contrast of that#reason against the nonsense of the town is what MADE him funny.#like the other day when i posted the comparison between ch4’s hallway specshot scene and the one from fridays page#max isnt being funny in the hallway. ‘why am i here’ is put against Haha Woww So Deel Max Lol to which he can reply no i mean study hall.#his reaction is rational. the sarcasm adds humor but its rather the world around him which is so newly strange that his normalcy is funny#and then versus the new page. max makes a Why Am I Here joke again. but this time the question is not asked by max the character who wants#to know why his father has dragged him to a kids entertainment zone. but rather is asked as the setup for an#Unexpected Quirky Classic Max One-Liner ‘no i meant on this earth why do i exist’#it just feels so much flatter. max isnt aloof and uncaring and sarcastic because he doesnt care about anything or anyone and is untouchable.#max is standoffish but genuinely nice and caring for the people he meets. his first instinct after landing on johnnys face#is to ask if hes alright. when PJ feels distraught at not being important in his own death maxes first instinct is to find a way to make him#feel better. to challenge that perspective and doubt the viewpoint his own poor self esteem gives him#when isabel comes out of her spirit trance and is too shocked to move max immediately rushes to her side to protect her against a spirit hes#terrified of. and then the next day brings what happened up to her and says hes sorry she went through that and hes got her back#he BREAKS HIS ARM TO PROTECT JOHNNY AGAINST HIJACK#hes a good protagonist because even though he has trouble connecting to others and being super friendly hes still NICE!!!! he still CARES!!!#i might take these tags and just make them a new post this turned into loving max hours#paranatural
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chisatowo · 2 years
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I love making aro characters as an aro person cause it's just self inflicted relief after spending so much time seeing the weak alloro aro hcs as the "nothing" option for a characters romantic orientation to just remember that aro characters can in fact be written to be complex and interesting characters and their aromanticism can be incredibly meaningful to their character and story even if it's not a point of conflict
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arolesbianism · 2 months
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Alright boys pack it up no more rain world posting new oni dlc is coming out in less than a week
#rat rambles#oni posting#rain posting#I jest I will probably still be posing some rain world stuff if I get around to designing more guys#but I can already feel the oni brain coming back and am half tempted to do one last comb through the files even tho I know itll be#pointless because the full dlc will be at my fingertips very soon#to be clear I 100% will be combing through the data of the full release too but thats a given#calvin my boy pls make it in pls don't get scrapped pls my boy#oh now that we're getting close Im gonna let myself talk abt this just this once but if you care abt potential spoilers stop reading#anyways so last I checked where the duplicant descriptions and stuff is stored there was an additional new duplicant named calvin#now I wasnt able to find anything else referencing him from my admittedly not super deep digging but he was there#I did thoroughly look through the spritesheets tho and hes definitely not there from what I could yell#or at least he wasnt when I checked idk maybe they put him in during one of the patches for some reason#but yeah I hope he makes it in despite all the specific advertising of them adding one new duplicant#its actually these descriptors that have been making me not wanna talk abt calvin dupe too openly as if he does make it in its probably#going to be a pretty big spoiler for a bit?#ofc if he is a secret of sorts then he wont be for long but if he is meant to be a surprise I don't wanna scream on the rooftop abt it#but I do wanna have proof that I found him before hand it he is a surprise I need to feel cool and special for looking at one file <3#yknow what I think I actually am going to pop open oni and tripple check that I'm not missing anything#I was playing rw a lot to cope with the dlc not being fully out but at this point Ive finished every campaign except saints#and saints is being a buggy bastard for me rn and keeps repeatedly softlocking me so Im giving up on it for now#like just this morning I did the entirety of the hunter campaign in like 2 hours I have so little left to do#if I do decide to replay a campaign tho it's probably going to be either gourmands or spearmasters since theyre my favorites to play as#idc what anyone says Ill always preffer the spearmasters story to rivulets I adore them both but ppl do not appreciate spearmaster enough#like every person Ive seen play it sees the ending as disappointing and I wont stand for it its high-key my favorite ending#now thats entirely because Im a moon enjoyer and a tragedy enjoyer but still I will always lose my mind over moon's final message
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kaddos · 7 months
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never in my life have i heard such a tragic and hopeful and beautiful song..... what if we were both addicts and desperately in love with each other but we could only manage to be the worst versions of ourselves to each other... and what if we understood each other profoundly because of this and yet we couldnt have any real closeness because our relationship would only ever be tumultuous. what if i hold a million versions of you in my head and you were bad to me but you were all i had and it wasnt even anything i could name. what if sometimes i cared about you desperately and you did sometimes and other times you were just fucking mean. and what if ill miss you forever. what then
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hyomaslut · 1 year
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──★ ˙🍓 ̟ !! what is this? boyfriend material.
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☆⌒(ゝ。∂).ᐟ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀʀᴇ ʙʟʟᴋ ʙᴏʏs ʟɪᴋᴇ ɪɴ ᴀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴘᴛ. 𝟷
✿ ─ characters: isagi yoichi, chigiri hyoma, reo mikage, nagi seishiro ✿ ─ cw: fluff, gn!reader, no pronouns but there are a few 'fem coded' things referenced like make up or skirts, aged-up!characters, established relationships, pet names, kissing, groping, pda, use of foul language, suggestive themes, proofread so many times so if there’s a typo ill cry ✿ ─ notes: this is my first post ♪(´▽`) i haven't written stuff like this in a pretty long time so bear with me ‹𝟹 this is some hybrid of headcanon and drabble idk
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ISAGI YOICHI is a full-fledged bonafide simp...
he suffers from tragic a condition. when he’s not trying? flirting supreme panty dropper. however, when he tries to flirt with someone he likes? bro is fumbling. at first he seems like such an instant charmer. hes a classic gentleman, great listener, and super attractive. but the second he gets an inkling of a crush, he ruins it for himself. stuttering and getting his words mixed up, saying the most embarrassing jumbled combination of what he actually meant to.
follows you around to all your tasks because how else would he spend his free time except hanging with his baby. to sephora, to the grocery store, to the salon, the the ends of the earth if that's where you're heading that day. more than happy to hold onto your hand as you go about your business, rambling about global soccer statistics and looking at you like you hold the world. yoichi is a prideful purse holder too, his arms and pockets and car being full of your belongings makes him insanely happy for some reason he can’t put his finger on. always ready to press the lip gloss you’re patting yourself down for into the palm your hand, taking a kiss as payment.
he’s bad at planning dates, so don’t put him in charge unless you want to be late to a reservation at a restaurant 2 hours away with mediocre food. he’s good at paying for them though!! the dates he does get to plan are usually to the mall. what can i say, man likes to spoil you.
at the mall isagi can kind of trick you. because typically if he were to offer to buy you a couple hundred dollars worth of things, you would absolutely refuse. buttt if its just one thing from this store and one thing from another, and maybe its the fact that you dont feel the weight of all the items as your boyfriend carries it all, but it flies under your radar. and at some point you look at yoichi… and he has a lot of shopping bags. surely some of those were his right? the little pleased love sick smile on his face says otherwise.
its so worth it to isagi tho. he gets to spend time with you, make you happy, be a doting bf. but it also means that he can pick out clothes for you. as generous as he was, he could be a bit of a greedy gifter - never leaving the mall without a new skirt of his choosing. will personally pick out a pile of things he wants you to try on just for him.
once youre with isagi for a few months, he reveals his true colors. man is a serial PDA offender. he just thinks you’re so pretty, and it gives him such an ego boost to be the guy by your side. better hold his hand or its going in your back pocket. leans in under the guise of giving you a quick, generally acceptable peck on the lips… but all of a sudden he wants another before you even fully pull away from the first and its all downhill from there. sits on your side of the table at restaurants instead of across from you so he can rest his hand on your thigh and sneak in small squeezes when he thinks youre not paying attention. and be careful about walking in front of him, he’s not strong enough to resist the urge to smack your ass.
if the PDA thing wasnt a dead give away, isagi is just very affectionate in general, honestly has a hard time leaving you alone when you’re in the same room as him. he just gravitates towards you no matter what he was previously doing. very easily distracted, very easy to bribe. he’s the type of guy where when he goes to get out of bed in the morning to go to practice, and you cling to him and ask him for just 5 more minutes, theres nothing that could stop him from sinking right back into your arms. his attendance record has definitely suffered because he is unable to deny you a single thing you ask for, especially if that thing is him.
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CHIGIRI HYOMA is taken and makes sure everyone knows it…
hyoma’s partner very quickly becomes his best friend if they weren’t before they started dating. it’s not even intentional, but he gets very quickly attached to you. sure, he has a decent amount of friends, but none of them know him like you do. he loves to hear you talk about your life, invested in your daily drama and indulging you with all of his. he likes to hear your input and insights on situations. he takes notes in his phone when he sees things he thinks you would like, or conversations he had that he wants to tell you about. forever surprised by how much he misses you when you’re apart, chigiri is used to not needing anyone the way he needs you. is so much grumpier at matches that have him go abroad without you, texting you often throughout the day, whenever he can get his hands on his phone.
because you’re now his best friend and partner, chigiri’s a bit tied to you at the hip, but he would never admit to being clingy. not that you mind, hanging out with him is fun and surprisingly intimate. he never fails to hold your hand wherever you go or throw an arm around your shoulder. on dates he’ll lean in close to your ear to whisper little observations and jokes about the people around, the two of you sharing witty comments and secretive snickers behind your hands. when hanging out with mutual friends, the way yours eyes meet his wordlessly, both holding the same micro expression, indistinguishable to other people, that says “we are so talking about that later”.
speaking of clinging to your side, hyoma can have a bit of a possessive streak at times. i feel like it’s something you don’t really expect of him until there’s a guy flirting with you in a store. the way your boyfriend is at your side before you can even answer, standing at his full height, squaring his shoulders with a sour look on his face, not at all shy about the way his arm snakes around your waist. “they’re not interested.” he states plainly, as if it were obvious, but if you payed close attention to him (which you always did), you would notice the distasteful curl of his lip or the venom seeping into his tone or the way his usually gentle fingers hold onto your side with a firm grip.
he doesn’t meet your eyes after, already sensing the knowing smirk on your lips. his ears turn red when you break the silence to tell him that green was a good color on him. but, your ever clever boyfriend is quick to reply, “that’s cute baby, but i’m not jealous. you haven’t seen me when i’m jealous.” the mischievous glimmer in his eye and the smug smile he wears reminds you to not test him.
king of matching outfits with you. not in the novelty shirts cheesy way, but he always asks for a fit check before he picks you up on dates. chigiri is outside your apartment within the hour, wearing a jacket that matches the color of your shoes and a sly grin. generally starts to shift his style to be a bit more cohesive with yours, he loves going out and looking like you belong together.
not to mention, matching outfits give him more excuses to take pictures with you. photos of you and him are plastered all over his instagram, your handle in his bio and everything. he’s no amateur either, always able to catch your best side, in perfect lighting. really makes you feel as pretty as he seems to think you are. hyoma is a bit of a show off too, so he gets a bit of an ego boost getting to let everyone know how cute you are, and that you’re all his.
hyoma greatly values the alone time he gets to spend with you. the best part of his week is sitting on the couch as you help him with his hair care routine. you running a mix of the comb and your fingers through his hair as the two of you catch up on the k-drama you started together. your touch and your attention and your warm presence enough to make the stress of a pro soccer career melt off his shoulders. makes you teach him how to do your nails and learns your skin care routine so that he can return the favor, although he’s much better at the latter.
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MIKAGE REO is ungodly whipped and more than a little dramatic…
if we’re talking about social media boyfriends, reo is near insufferable. let’s be real, reo was already flexing on the gram before you got with him. constantly posting pictures of his car and expensive watches and exclusive clubs. he just becomes worse when you agree to go out with him. his story is full of aesthetically blurry shots of you, sometimes featuring him, anywhere and everywhere. in his car, on dates, cooking in his kitchen. he even found the audacity to post a picture of you in his bed, your bare back in full frame, the sheets pooled around your waist. “i’m so lucky” was the caption and the only context provided. unsurprisingly the lifespan of that post was quite short once you caught wind of it, with the assurance that he wouldn’t be getting so lucky in the near future.
i totally think reo is the type of guy that tries to act like a fuckboy but is secretly a hopeless romantic. in other words, reo is a huge sap™. has a picture of you in his wallet. you’re his screen saver and all his passwords feature your name. nagi is the last person left that will still listen to reo ramble on about you, all of his other friends having gotten tired of it.
we already know that reo is taking you to fancy dinners on the regular, but more unexpectedly i think he is a big fan of outdoorsy dates. previously mentioned hopeless romantic tendencies means reo loves a picnic way more than he lets on. his favorite is when the summer comes around and he gets to take you to the beach. if reo dies and goes to heaven and it's not you rubbing sunscreen into his warm back in a skimpy swimsuit he picked out for you himself, he's not interested. a close second favorite of his is late night drives with you. all the windows of his luxury sports car down, blasting a playlist the two of you made together, singing loud and ugly down the empty freeway. in these moments you make him feel weightless and he swears it’s addicting.
king of clingy. every time that you feel your phone vibrate, there's a good chance that it's your boyfriend. never with anything important either, asking where you are, how was your day, sending you pics of whatever he is doing, even resorting to imessage games when he runs out of things to talk about. he just always finds himself itching to open your contact. if mikage reo could eat up all of your attention, he would not hesitate to do so.
reo is usually the caretaker. when he obtained status of boyfriend, you automatically went on his list of special people in his life, only really consisting of you and nagi, and this granted you the exclusive privilege of walking all over him if you so please. truly a pushover and weak to your pouts. while we’re on the subject of ways to get him to fold, reo is surprisingly easy to flatter. your compliments are honey to his ears, no matter how many people have said the same to him before. his heart thumps loud in his chest whenever you do any act of service or labor of love for him. just wait for the day you buy this man some flowers. got his hand splayed over his red face, his palm not wide enough to cover his infatuated grin. "they're really for me, babe? god i knew i picked you for a reason.”
reo's feelings for you run extremely deep. scary deep. you make him feel stupid and irrational. he can't think straight, he's impulsive. you have to keep a close eye on him because give reo enough time alone and he'll convince himself that getting your name tattooed across his chest is an amazing idea, a grandiose display of his affection and devotion to you - sick as hell too. god forbid you go on a trip by yourself, there's honestly a decent chance you'll come home to a marriage proposal and explanations on how "no no, don't worry babe, i know its sooner than you expected but i've got it all planned out.” just be glad that up until this point he has resisted the strong urge to drop a fourth of his trust fund on a ring, a price he's more than willing to pay to make you all his.
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NAGI SEISHIRO is greedy and will readily take a mile if given an inch…
nagi is… new to the whole boyfriend thing to say the least. not to say he’s bad at it or anything, but i imagine that in the beginning of your relationship, things are a bit, for a lack of better words, lukewarm. he struggles a bit with recognizing that the switch from friends to more than friends is more than just the title, letting you completely take the wheel. but his passiveness doesn’t last long. not when he can’t escape the way you are constantly on his mind. he thought it was overwhelming enough having a crush on you, but now that he’s falling for you it’s on another level. he thinks of you when he first opens his eyes, facing the obnoxious blue light of his phone to send you your daily goodmorning :x . he thinks of you at night, when he’s restlessly fighting to fall asleep before he ultimately caves and facetimes you so that he can drift off to your tired mumbles and even breaths. he thinks of you when practice drags on, the anticipation of seeing you after the only thing keeping him from giving into his exhaustion.
nagi can’t get you out of his head for the life of him, but to be fair he doesn’t put up much of a fight. seishiro is used to getting what he wants, so what does he do when his desire for you becomes a hassle? he makes it your problem. constantly calling you and asking you to pick him up from social functions because he misses you. insisting that he stays the night at your place or that you come to his because he needs his daily dose of you. and he doesn’t have the shame to be shy of telling you everything on his mind either. he unintentionally says very flustering things, unabashedly demanding your touch and your company, no matter who is listening. it’s your fault he’s like this after all, you might as well take responsibility and give him what he wants.
and what he wants is affection from you, as much as he can get. serishiro is mesmerized by your reactions. being in love with you is uncharted territory that he maps out with piqued curiosity and newfound greed. especially kissing. once nagi gets his first taste of kissing you for real, messy and needy and drawn out, he never wants to go back. not after seeing your red face, eyes lidded and lips parted so cutely he just has to steal one more. now his day dreams revolve around you, what flavor of chapstick you’re wearing, what perfume do you have on, are you thinking of him as much as he does you? thats one thing he never really finds the courage to ask, but that he secretly hopes is true.
he loves to find things you can work on together, even if you always end up being the one putting in more effort. nagi will insist on cooking dinner together, and maybe you get his help for a good 10 minutes before he’s slumped in a seat at the counter eating the ingredients. buys tons of lego sets for the two of you to put together and while you’re following the instructions, he’s stealing pieces you need so he can build a little car to push around the table while he watches you figure it out. he’ll even settle for a puzzle and a movie, but your out of luck if you expect him to do anything but the edges.
the lazy genius only really has the time and energy to have a couple of important people in his life, but once you make it into that inner circle, that shit is permanent as far as he’s concerned. it begins with him telling you that it only makes sense to leave some clothes at his apartment, you’re at his place half the week anyway. and then its him smuggling over your favorite pillows and stuffed animals to his bed instead of yours. then he’s asking you to go grocery shopping with him every week. the jokes he makes about the fact that, “you keep all your stuff here anyway. just move in with me already,” are far too frequent to be subtle. but when he hits you with the puppy eyes, which are annoyingly effective, how could you say no?
you’ve put yourself in his orbit after all and now the solar system that is nagi seishiro will use his gravity to pull you inevitably closer. it’s doomed.
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is my bias obvious?? cuz i feel like it might be… lmk which one was your favorite!!
© 2023 hyomaslut. please do not copy, translate, or repost any of my content onto any other sites.
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coriphallus · 1 year
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The Dark Urge thoughts (and prayers)
anyone whos been following me knows im absolutely not normal about durge and i wanna share some tidbits that are implied, but not necessarily canonised, from their story;
I already made a post about it but it seems like bhaal has a degree of control over whether they live or die. he can deny them death, if they fail the duel with orin.
bhaal can command the slayer. he forces orin to transform if you talk to her about sarevok and the scene makes it clear that its against her will.
bhaal manipulates his kin in a subtler way. in the colony you can find a letter from old durge thats apologising to his father for 'liking' gortash. you can interpret their relationship as something deeper but even if it wasnt, this reads to me as terrified and desperate.
the reason being, if you have a LI in act 2 you get the famous bondage scene. coupled up with the letter above makes me think this is a pattern. bhaal can use their feelings against them. he did it with sarevok and orin's mother, orin's mother and orin, etc... it's not as straightforward as 'if you disobey ill kill the one you love'. you will. durge will.
bhaal is testing them in act 2, he revels in chaos, sure, but in the grand scheme of things he doesn't care about isobel. even if you tell scel that you'll kill her you're told that youre too late, you ignored your urges. from durge, bhaal doesn't expect calm calculated murder, he expects blind obedience. failing to receive that his first punishment is to take away something they cherish. there are no half measures, theres no bargaining with a god.
we get so many snippets of information that this has happened before, their foster family being their first victims. theyre made to kill their support system with their own hands, with no one to blame but themselves. they are actually apologising to their father for being fond of gortash because (in my humble opinion) theyre genuinely afraid.
how many times could this have happened, how many nights durge couldve woken up covered in the blood of someone they love until they gave in, became daddys obedient puppet?
durge is groomed for murder. scel says 'you always failed to conduct yourself without me' and given who he is i dont think hes talking about table manners when he says 'conduct'. durge needs 24/7 oversight to set themselves right lest they get tempted by softer things. lest they dare to step away from bhaals grand plan.
durge do have a choice. just as shadowheart had a choice, just as wyll or astarion had a choice. its a choice only in name.
theres no ending besides refusing bhaal that their friends and LI wont die by their hands. the entire lore of bhaalspawn is that theyre meant to conquer the world in his name and slit their own throat a top the mountain of corpses. as cazador aptly put, 'theyre made to be consumed.'
you can pray to bhaal and the narrator says he won't accept [any offering] but the entire world.
durge (and bhaalspawn) do get some sort of euphoria from murder. they crave it like an addict, but bhaalspawn (on prev games) don't constantly have to grapple with these urges as durge does.
now durge is a slightly special case but not in a good way. its implied that theyre not like a regular bhaalspawn, that theyre made by bhaal directly -so to speak-. which is to say, if youre playing a drow, they are bhaals closest approximation of a drow rather than a drow flesh and blood.
thats why theyre fighting tooth and nail against these urges every step of the way, they are literally bhaal himself(in essence). the personality they develop, the person who calls themselves 'tainted' and 'wretched', the character thats making choices throughout the game, theyre the tumour.
theirs is the story of cycle of abuse cranked up to 1000 and it is in parallel to all other origin companions.
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kayewrite · 19 days
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Swear it again
(bsn ending #6)
Bang chan x reader !! Christopher Bang x reader !! word count: 2.8k
bsn alternative ending #4 wherein; chan.. is what your heart wants
an: any team chan here? coz babe! i wasnt in any team but i can say that.. i love chan here!! (and seungmin */sobs)
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part 1 and part 2 first
Bang Chan was the most mature person in your circle.
He was the one who would scold everyone for their wrongdoings, always making sure they understood the consequences of their actions..
He gave advice like a big brother, offering guidance that was both thoughtful and practical, always with your best interests at heart..
He provided help whenever he could, going out of his way to make sure no one felt left behind, even when it meant sacrificing his own time or energy..
And he protected your friendship in the best way he could, often stepping in to mediate conflicts, always striving to keep the group united and strong.
He wrote songs, pouring his heart and soul into every lyric and melody, creating music that resonated with everyone who listened..
He wanted to become a singer ever since he was a kid, because he loved making people happy..
He sang well..
He produced beats..
He got his driver's license at an early age..
He was gentle, his kindness evident in the way he treated everyone around him, always with a smile and a reassuring word..
He was a good cook..
He liked sunny days more than rainy ones..
His hobby was playing sports..
He thought his charming point was his dimples when he smiled, a feature that made everyone around him smile too, his happiness infectious..
He could rotate his hand 360 degrees, a quirky talent that never failed to amuse you, just another thing that made him unique..
He was handsome..
And cute at the same time.
—Wait. Were we still talking about how mature he is?
Well, no! You were talking about how much you knew him.
And why did you know him that much? Because, yes indeed, you liked him.
But—
"I swear to God! I would never fall in love with someone like Chan!" It was just a teasing moment as you lifted your right hand, as if pledging an oath.
You were playing truth or dare with your friends one time. And then you picked truth, and they teased you, asking if you liked Chan—where you immediately denied it by swearing.
And you thought you would never.
But then there was him, always taking care of you, asking How are you after your major exams.
Asking what your cravings were for the day so he could buy them for you.
Asking what you were eating in your apartment. If are you just eating cup noodles again.
Patting your back and giving you a hug when you cried after failing your physics subject, holding you close as you let the tears fall.
The first one to greet you on your birthday, warm and cheerful as he wished you all the happiness in the world.
You felt like… you didn’t understand.
Yes, others cared about you, but Chan… there was something about him you couldn’t quite pinpoint.
And when the way he slowly placed a pair of headphones on you and then played a song he had written and composed by himself, his eyes watching your reaction…
You finally admitted it to yourself—yes… you liked him.
"I swear to God…" Now, you couldn’t continue your words as the others looked at you, waiting for your answer.
"I'm tired of playing. Let's sleep." Then you stood up, leaving them with confused faces.
Well, don’t overthink it. They were just wondering if you really knew how to play truth or dare.
When he wrote that blue sticky note song… you thought he was the one who sneakily slipped it into your binder.
"We helped in making that song," he said as you faced him, "but Changbin wrote the title and most of the lyrics."
That answered your question—it was Changbin who really did put it there.
Not gonna lie, you really hoped it was him. But knowing that another friend did it, you felt anxious. If you were to tell everyone you liked this man standing in front of you… what would their reaction be?
After that night at the party, when you got home and cried, you knew now that Bang Chan liked you. But you didn’t know what to do.
It was because of your stupid swear to yourself!
Why did you pledge something when you couldn’t even handle the consequences?
You continued your life after that, but things felt different. You started putting up barriers between yourself and your friends, especially Seungmin and Changbin, who you always saw in class.
Thankfully, they seemed to understand, giving you the space you thought you needed.
But deep down, you hoped that everything would go back to normal. In just a few days, you already missed the closeness, the easy laughter, the sense of belonging that came with your friendship. And so, you made a promise to yourself that you would fix this—no matter how difficult it might be.
You were about to take a different path home when you spotted Seungmin walking in your direction. He caught your eye, and for a moment, you considered slipping away before he could reach you. But before you could decide, he stopped you.
"Wait. Let's talk."
Even though you weren't ready to face him, there was a pull, a longing to reconnect. You missed Seungmin—your best friend, the one who always understood you without needing many words.
As you both sat down, sipping on your favorite coffee, an awkward silence hung between you, thick with unsaid words.
"I know this is hard for you," Seungmin began, his voice gentle and steady, as if he had rehearsed what to say a hundred times before. "But I hope you won't go through with your plan of distancing yourself from us. We don’t want to lose you."
You bit your lip, feeling the weight of his words sink in. That wasn’t what you wanted either. They were all precious to you. You were just trying to give yourself some space, to sort out your feelings before they got even more complicated. "It’s not that I want to leave…" you mumbled, struggling to find the right words. "I just… I don’t know how to handle all of this right now."
Seungmin nodded, his eyes never leaving yours. "But we’ll give you the time you need," he said softly, taking a small step closer, as if he wanted to bridge the gap that had formed between you. "Just know that we're here for you. We're friends, and we should be with each other, especially when things get tough."
It was as if he could read your mind—he knew exactly what you were thinking, even though you hadn’t said a word. The unspoken understanding between you was comforting, but it also made you feel guilty for even considering pulling away.
"I’m sorry," you finally spoke, your voice trembling with emotion. You weren’t entirely sure why you were apologizing, but you felt it deep in your heart. Maybe it was because you were about to break his heart, to put a crack in the foundation of your friendship. "I… I just…"
You wanted to tell him everything, but the words were stuck, lodged in your throat, as if admitting them out loud would make everything too real to bear.
Seungmin looked at you, his expression softening with concern. "Hey," he said gently, reaching out to place a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "It’s okay. You don’t have to say it all at once."
You swallowed hard, trying to steady your breathing. "I just don’t want to hurt anyone," you whispered, your voice barely audible.
"You like someone, but you're afraid to choose because you don’t want to hurt the others, right?" Seungmin’s words hit the mark, once again proving how well he knew you.
You didn’t nod, but you didn’t deny it either. Instead, you lowered your head, unable to meet his gaze. How did he always know what you were thinking? How did he always manage to say exactly what you needed to hear?
"Don’t be sorry, you silly," Seungmin chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. His laughter was warm, like a blanket on a cold day, wrapping around you and making you feel safe. It was as if he wasn’t hurt at all, like this was just another one of your usual conversations. "Why would you be sorry? It’s not like this is all your fault."
"But it is," you insisted, your voice cracking as you finally met his eyes. "It feels like it is. I never meant for this to happen, but now… now everything’s so messed up."
"Well it was your fault to be pretty.." He mumbled something under his breath, something you couldn’t quite catch—But then before you could ask what, he spoke up again, louder this time, "Don’t be sorry!"
You were thankful for his words, but the anxiety gnawing at you only grew worse. What if Seungmin was just saying this to comfort you while he was hurting inside? What if he was pretending everything was fine just for your sake?
"Who is it, by the way?" he asked casually, as if he were asking about the answer to a quiz question. His tone was light, but there was a hint of curiosity in his eyes,
"It’s--" your heart starting to race,
"It’s Chan, right?" He slapped the table, a triumphant smile on his face as if he’d just solved a puzzle. "I knew it! Ever since we played that game years ago, I had a feeling. You swore you’d never fall for him, and you think I’m a fool to believe that?"
You blinked at him, startled. "How… how did you--"
Seungmin grinned, leaning back in his chair with an air of confidence. "Come on, it’s not that hard to figure out. You’re not as good at hiding your feelings as you think." He paused, his smile softening. "And honestly? I’m glad it’s Chan. He’s a good guy. Just… I didn’t expect it to happen so soon."
Seungmin’s laughter was infectious, and despite the situation, you found yourself smiling. "I mean… I didn’t want this to happen, but--"
"But you—"
"Wait, let me finish talking," you interrupted 'cause he was always cutting you off, laughing at his eagerness Seungmin joined in, the tension between you easing with every shared laugh.
As you continued to talk, the comfort and ease you always felt with Seungmin returned. He had a way of making everything feel right, even when it wasn’t.
"What I want to say is… go for it! Go get that Chan!" He grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "But if he ever hurts you, I swear to God, he won’t be able to walk again."
You laughed at Seungmin’s playful threat, feeling a warmth in your chest that only a friend like him could bring. In the end, you sent him a grateful smile, and Seungmin returned it, understanding exactly what you meant without needing to say it out loud.
You hesitated for a moment before knocking on Chan's studio door. The silence that followed felt like an eternity. You knocked again, the sound echoing in the quiet hallway. Still, there was no response. With a deep breath, you knocked a third time, your heart pounding in your chest.
"Chan, are you mad at me? Please… let's talk." Your voice wavered as you spoke to the door in front of you, desperation seeping into your words.
But there was still no answer. The lump in your throat grew as you fought back the tears that threatened to spill over. Just as you were about to give up, a voice behind you made you freeze.
"Why are you here?" Chan's voice was laced with surprise, as if he couldn’t believe you were standing there. He must have come back from somewhere, holding a cup of coffee in his hand. "I mean… I’m glad you’re here!" He quickly added, realizing how he might have sounded. "I’m sorry, I just went to get some coffee. Come on, let’s go inside."
You blinked away the tears that had gathered in your eyes and followed him as he unlocked the door and pushed it open for you. The familiar warmth of his studio washed over you as you stepped inside, the soft hum of equipment and the faint scent of coffee mingling in the air.
You took a seat in the extra chair beside his workstation, and Chan set his coffee down on the table. "Wait here for a second," he said, heading toward the small kitchenette. "I’ll get another cup so we can share this."
You nodded silently, watching him as he moved around. When he returned, he poured more than half of his coffee into your cup, leaving himself with only a small portion.
"Here," he said, handing the cup to you before sitting down beside you. "How are you?" he asked, his eyes searching your face for any sign of how you were really feeling.
You tried to maintain eye contact, but the weight of everything that had happened over the past week made it impossible. You looked down, your hands trembling slightly as you held the cup. "I’m… fine," you mumbled, knowing full well that Chan could see through the lie.
He didn’t push you, though. He knew you well enough to understand that you weren’t ready to talk about what was really going on. "I really wanted to come to your apartment," Chan said softly, his voice filled with concern. "But then I realized you might need some time alone."
His understanding, much like Seungmin’s, was both comforting and heartbreaking. You appreciated how well he knew you, but it also made you feel even guiltier for pulling away from him.
Chan hesitated for a moment before speaking again. "Uhm, since you’re here… Can you listen to the song I’m working on?" His voice was tentative, almost as if he was afraid you’d say no.
A small smile tugged at your lips, and you nodded. "Yes, I’d love to."
Chan’s face lit up at your response, and he quickly grabbed a pair of headphones. Even though you were perfectly capable of putting them on yourself, he carefully placed them over your ears, making sure they were adjusted just right. His touch was gentle, almost reverent, and it made your heart ache in ways you couldn’t describe.
He pressed play, and the music flowed into your ears. The first few notes were soft, an acoustic intro that was both unexpected and captivating. Then the piano joined in, followed by the steady beat of drums. It was unlike anything you had heard from Chan before—new, refreshing, and undeniably beautiful.
"Are you the one singing?" you asked, your voice full of awe as the song continued to play.
"Yeah," Chan replied, his voice barely audible over the music. He smiled at your reaction, a mix of pride and nervousness in his eyes.
You focused on the lyrics, trying to piece together the story they told. The words were tender, vulnerable, and they struck a chord deep within you. As the song came to an end, you slowly removed the headphones, letting the silence settle around you.
"What’s the title?" you asked, as you always did after listening to one of Chan’s songs.
Chan chuckled, shaking his head. "I’ll tell you later," he said with a playful grin.
"It was amazing, Chan," you said sincerely, your voice thick with emotion. You could tell he felt the depth of your words, his smile softening into something more genuine.
For a moment, you simply looked at him, taking in every detail of his expression. The way his eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled, the warmth in his gaze, the slight flush on his cheeks—it all made your heart race. Before you knew what you were doing, you leaned in, closing the distance between you, and kissed him.
Chan froze for a split second, caught off guard, but then he responded, his lips moving against yours in a way that felt both hesitant and eager. The taste of coffee lingered between you, warm and comforting, but it was the intensity of the emotions that overwhelmed you. Your tears, which you had been holding back for so long, finally spilled over.
You realized what the lyrics were really about. They were about you. Every word, every note—he had written them for you.
I swear I would never fall in love with you that was what I always told myself too, but every time I saw you, I couldn’t help but fall harder
Swear that you will like me too, just like how I liked you. I hoped you know it… Please swear again
and that was the title.
---
an: help
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honoriotsusuki · 2 months
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🎨𝙎𝙏𝙊𝙋 𝙃𝙄𝙏𝙏𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙊𝙉 𝙈𝙔 𝙈𝙊𝙈-🎨
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Fyodor x reader
Hard crack and fluff
DESC: Dazai had always hoped his mother would find someone again after his father left her when he was young. However he was not all to pleased to find out she found a FUCKING TERRORIST
WARNINGS: Mentions of terrorism. Everybody begrudgingly tolerates each other as opposed to outright killing each other. Probably ooc Fyodor. Suggestive but it's played for laughs. Kinda spoiler for Fyodors ability if you squint.
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Dazai never knew his father. And he never wanted to. He had walked out on his mother when he was less than a year old. And yet his mother did it all for him. She tried her best to help him in any way she could despite her struggles and lack of child support. So as Dazai got older he had hoped his mother would find someone worth her time. A guy that treated her well and made sure she was well taken care of. This is not what he meant by that.
[NAME] stood there happily. Elated to finally introduce the two. Dazai had to fight back the urge to gag, scream, and strike the rat all at once. His eye slightly twitching. Fyodor. His mom was dating a fucking terrorist and she hadnt the smallest clue. His sweet, loving, passionate mother. This was ridiculous. His mother was young, she had him in her late teens so she was in her mid to late thirties, early forties. DAZAI HAD NO FUCKING CLUE HOW OLD THIS RAT BITCH WAS. I mean really- for all he knew he predated the fuckinf dinosaurs. He could've had a drinking contest with Christopher godamn Columbus and he would be none the wiser.
Fyodor- wasnt taking this all too well either. I mean, really - how the hell was this your son!? When Fyodor first met you, he saw you as yet another good person who had to live in a world of tainted ability users. However, he began to see you more frequently. Whether that be by coincidence or subconsciously going to places he had seen you before, he didn't know. But it all led in him, eventually asking you out. Fyodor never considered himself a romantic. He had plans - big ones! He couldn't risk distracting himself. But it was something about the way you spoke, your gentle demeanor and sweet mannerisms. How your coat was slightly stained with bright paint. So, of course, he wasn't risking losing you. When you stated dating, you had laid out immediately that if your son didn't like him, it couldn't happen. You valued his opinion over all else. And Fyodor admired it. You were a loving mother. But if he knew your son was the living embodiment of the "'hang' in there!" cat posters, he would have hired an assasin to take him out. (Not that it would've worked anyway. Dazai never seems to stay dead.)
So now here they both sat, at a cute brunch spot eating together. Anytime you looked their way, their smiles would be back. But the moment you left for the bathroom, they both began openly debating.
"Stop fucking my Mom." Dazai grit his teeth, his fork slightly scratching against his face. Fyodor rolled his eyes, "we haven't performed coitus as of yet you imbecile." He scoffed. Dazai visibly recoiled, relieved and yet disgusted. "Who the hell calls it that?" He gagged. "I would rather adress it as such than with vulgar language-" Fyodor argued. "Oh my god. You sound like a fucking Victorian man. What do the sight of her ankles get your rocks hard my guy?" Dazai groaned. "If you keep this up I will make love with her to spite you." Fyodor glared. Dazai paused. Turning to him in disbelief.
"You wouldnt-
"Watch me, cretin."
@HONORIOTSUSUKI
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jeoncopi · 1 month
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• — wednesday — •
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GET INTO IT: I’m not really sure what is this but I saw this jungkook again and so this came out lmao. (jungkook is kind of an asshoolee here tho..)
PAIRING: jungkook x reader
WORD COUNT: 1.2k
THIS IS A: drabble.
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“it’s not fair! babe. let me make it up to you, hm?”
“let me go.”
“please, please, please listen to me.. babe, please.”
jungkook doesn’t seem to understand that what you feel is beyond upsetting.
how many times is he going to promise something he can’t even achieve?
“it was so simple. so, so simple jungkook.” you’re clearly upset.
“I know but—“
his arms are no longer around your body.
“that’s your excuse. ‘I know but’. everytime you say that, I know there’s some bullshit coming.” you pause. “just how many times you’ll keep this game coming up? am I some sort of game?”
“no! never!”
“so why you keep failing me like this? don’t say you’ll meet me in some place and not go. it’s your 5th time doing this shit and to be honest I even gave you too many opportunities to bounce back but you never do. only doing worst by each time. it’s embarrassing! I can’t even make plans even if it’s short with my boyfriend ‘cause he doesn’t wanna show up? embarrassing!”
“I do want to show up!”
“then why the fuck do you fail me each time?” your pierced gaze showing nothing more but annoyance with a bunch of mixed feelings. anger, sadness, disappointment, embarrassment, you name it. it couldn’t get any worst. “oh, are you gonna say ‘it’s for work’ each time I say why do you keep meeting this new girl? you think I don’t know?”
“baby I will never cheat on you if that’s what you’re implying.” tone so serious. jungkook really doesn’t want to mess things up. more so.
“fucking explain.” as sharp as you say it, you just want to know the truth.
“I.. um. agh! I don’t even know why I’m nervous, I ain’t doing dumb shit so why—“ mumbling more to himself, he clears his throat. “anyways.” careful of touching your hands in case you slap them away, he approaches you very slowly. surprisingly, you let him.
“you know how badly I want to say you’re the only girl in my eyes and that I could never love or devote to anyone the way I do with you. believe me when I say you’re the only woman in this whole world who has seen me like this and whom I treat like this.” eyes so clear, you could say he really meant this but still, you couldn’t just give in like this so you just let him speak only looking at him with the same pierced eyes. “but I hate cliche things and I know you already know all of this even if you’re mad at me so I’m just gonna say that the reason why I have been meeting this new girl is because of my manager.” he desperately pauses. “he does know I’m taken and baby,” he gently squeezes your hands onto his. “believe me when I say I make it fucking clear that I am dating YOU. like there’s no one there that doesn’t know I’m dating YOU.” he pauses. eyes glistening pleading for forgiveness while he continues to speak. “but somehow my boss wants me to get closer to her. I wasn’t even gonna speak, even look at her but he wants me and her to get close.”
“of all people?” you take his hands off of yours but he takes them back.
“I think he wants to fuck her if I’m being honest.” it’s his response.
“and that has something to do with you because…?” you still can’t believe he’s saying this shit.
“by his own words, he knows I’m the best at persuasion with people. he wants her to work with him in this big upcoming project we have and the best way to get her close is.. by talking to me.”
you’re silent. no words coming out of your mouth and that gets jungkook to plead even more.
“I swear to god say something.” anxiously biting his lips he gets closer to you but you just keep on staring at him without a word. “..babe.”
“how does that explains you dipping each we have plans?” he’s silent. “am I not your first priority? like I thought so! as YOU claim.” sarcasm wasnt out of this house.. was it?
he sighs. “you are.”
“then?”
his eyes.. they start scanning your entire body. up and down as you want to know what’s going on inside of his head.
“wanna fuck you right now.”
“what?” you just made the most disgusting face that could ever be created. “the fuck are you saying right now?! I can’t with you. i’m fucking done.” getting away from him, you head towards your room until..
he stops you by holding one side of your wrist. “no! babe- wait! l-let me just—let me show you okay? just—“ at this point he thinks he’s the most stupid man on earth. “let me show you why you’re always gonna be my first priority.”
“by fucking me?” you did a quick pause. “that’s not how you’re gonna show it! are you playing dumb? you literally can demonstrate that by fucking showing up to our supposed dates!” eyes becoming watery with anger. “if you wanted to fuck me so bad, then you’ll fucking be good to me and actually listen to me! — I won’t be giving any fucking sex right now or ever! I’m done.”
..and those were your last worst before slapping his hands away from him and smashing the door in front of his face.
jungkook knows he fucked up, he also recognized after thinking for a long time that he needed to grow up. also, that not all problems can be fixed with sex! just.. who the hell he has become to? to leave his girlfriend hanging there, paying less attention to her when he thought the relationship was so fine.. his wrong doing here apart from the many failed dates and promises, was… believing that she could forgive him anytime.
they weren’t kids anymore, they’re literal adults with responsibilities and as much as he was busy, she also is. the difference being, that she could make time for him while he focused way too much into getting his boss to hook up with this new girl.. he thought about how fucked up it was, but even when he didn’t agree with it at all, he still continued to help..
why?
jungkook himself didn’t even know the answer to it only that he just continued to act on literal command..
was this also too much for him? many things needed to get fixed.. but still, he hoped that his pretty, number one girl could ever come again and forgive him.. give him another chance.
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mangosrar · 10 months
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cerebral
matt sturniolo x fem reader
this isn’t proof read 😛😛
suggestive ???
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i knew this would happen. it happened with the last guy i went on a date with, and the guy before that. they just werent him. it was such a horrible feeling to sit across from someone in a restaurant searching their face for a more familiar one, one that had memories etched into his smile lines, one that had a piece of you with him. but the feeling of having him, but not being abel to have him, wasnt much better.
it was hard, finding the middle ground between my ex and my best friend. we both promised that if we ever broke up nothing would change between us. but it did. i was more cautious of him. i picked my words carefully when they left my mouth. i studied his body language whenever i was close to him. he was like a ticking time bomb. he could be set off at any minute.
lazy footsteps could be heard before i saw matt pad his way into my living room before he plopped himself down next to me. he let himself in. of course he did. he leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees before turning to look at me with a sad smile on his face.
"you okay?" his voice was hushed. like if he spoke too loud i might shatter. i just nodded with a gloomy smile on my face.
"so why do you look so sad y/n?" he knew me so well and i hated it. i couldnt differentiate wether he knew me so well because he was my bestfriend for so long, or if because he was the love of my life at one point.
"just the date. i dont think you wanna hear about it" i let out a sad laugh as i spoke. his eyebrows furrowed for a second before he replied.
"youre still my bestfriend y/n. just because youre my ex too doesn’t mean you cant tell me about the new guys" he sounded genuine. like he didnt care about the new guys. like he wasnt mad about them. but he should be. i wish he was. i wish he was repulsed at the thought of me ever being able to move on from him. but he wasnt. i kept my eyes trained to the ground. there was a heavy silence as he searched my face. i could feel his wandering eyes burning holes into me. like he could see straight into my brain.
"he called me cerebral matt" i paused, eyes still boring holes into the carpet beneath me. "i didnt even know what it meant" i raised my eyebrows and let out a huff of air through my nose. "would it have killed him to call me pretty instead?" i finally looked up at matt to see his eyes still on me. a look on his face that i couldnt decipher. i hated that he could see my walls crumbling.
"you are pretty y/n" he cooed, his voice so sickly sweet. matts hand moved onto my leg. rubbing slow circles with his thumb. i hated this. i hated that he could sit there and tell me this and not be mine. how could he promise to soften every edge and hold the world to its best when he was killing me.
"you cant say thing like this matt" i pushed his hand off my leg and just like that the walls were built back up again. his eyes dropped to his hand that was now slumped onto the sofa then back up to my face. he knew this was coming.
"why not?" he knew why. he just wanted to hear me say it. i paused momentarily. weighing up my options. deciding wether to say the real reason or to just leave it hanging in the air and say something that we both know is a lie. i didnt know where i stood with matt. he would treat me like in still his girlfriend in some ways, caring for me, being a shoulder for me to cry on and always being there to hold my hand when i needed him to, but he would drop it after a few seconds, leaving cold, heart shaped scars in his wake.
"because im still in love with you" tears were threatening to spill as i spoke. his face didnt move a fraction. he didnt even blink, just staring at me like he was deep in thought. this was old news for him and he probably could have beat me to it but atleast he was kind enough to let me say it. matt didnt even speak. he just kept staring at me as he brought a gantle hand up to the side of my face.
before i could even pull his hand off my face his lips were on mine. i didnt have the type of self control to pull away. i leaned into him, craving the closeness, luckily he got the hint and pulled me into his lap so i was straddling him and the kiss grew heavy, his tongue forcing its way into my mouth, his wandering hands grabbing and groping whatever skin he could. he moved his mouth off mine and began trailing wet kisses down my neck and jawline making my breath hitch and my eyes close.
he began sucking and biting the skin on the side of my neck making me while. my hands found home in his hair, tugging softly, earning a satisfied hum from matt before he spoke against me.
"lets just get back together mh?" i was so lost in the way his lips felt on my skin i didnt even register what he had said until a few seconds later. i immediately pulled his head away from me and stared at him with wide eyes.
"what?" surprise evident in the sound of my voice.
"i dont see what the problem is, we both still love each other and i hate seeing you go on dates with shitty guys so why not?" i couldnt even reply to him. i just stared at him with my wouth hung open. what the fuck.
"if you dont want to, ill stop, but if you do, just say the words and ill give you whatever you want." he sounded so sure.
"yes" that was all he needed before he smirked and brought his lips to mine again, kissing me, hot and heavy.
the kiss was sloppy and desperate, both of us urgent for a touch we craved so badly. he ground his hips up, pressing his hard on into my heat making me whine into his mouth. i felt him smile against my lips before he kissed down my chin and throat before licking a stripe up it, pulling a moan from me, causing my hips to stutter against his involuntarily.
make up sex is good for the soul.
pt 2 coming soon an it’s spicy 🤓
taglist: @christinarowie332 @biimpanicking @soursturniolo @freshlovehacker @urmyslxt @kitaysworld @kvtie444 @chrisenthusiast @flowerxbunnie @mattsd0ll @itsjennarose @hearttshapedkisses @lovingsturniolo
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yujinslovr · 11 months
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DAY 11 : rosé x fem!reader
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KINKTOBER MASTERLIST
CW: marking, infidelity, cunnilingus
word count: 1,233
a/n: reader has a husband bcz i refuse to write infidelity w a girl, also not proofread so pls excuse any mistakes🙁🙁
“r-rosie, d-don't leave any m-marks, he m-might find out!” you let out a small yelp when you felt rosie bite into your skin, for sure leaving a mark.
“I'll make sure to leave them, let him see. let him see how bad he does in bed, so much so that you have to find pleasure with me.” the way she breathed the words into your skin felt so insanely good. 
her soft lips glided along your bare neck, her hands softly kneading your boobs as she had her fun with marking you. “mm, gonna make sure your stupid husband knows that you don't care about him.” 
you let out soft moans at the feeling of rosé nibbling along your neck mixed with the stimulation on your breasts. her lips sucked a trail along your neck, leading to your breasts. she swirled her tongue around your areola, wrapping her mouth over your left breast. the soft yet wet feeling of her tongue on your breast was heavenly, rosie always had a way with her mouth. 
the ironic thing about your whole situation was that you had met rosé through your husband. rosé was your husbands boss, you were introduced to rosé at one of your husband’s work functions. even the thought of infidelity wasnt something you entertained before meeting rosé, you loved your husband and would never do something to harm your marriage. this changed the night you met rosé though, the way she reached for your hand, and placed a soft kiss on the dorsal side of your hand, you knew you were done for in that moment alone. you never meant for it to spiral into something this big. you were under the influence when you spent your first night with rosé, you told yourself it’d never happen again, that this was nothing but a mistake. 
seeing where you were now, it was obvious that it wasn't just a one time thing, rosé was the best you’d ever had. you just couldn’t seem to let go of her, everything about her intoxicated you, as if everytime you came into her vicinity you were suddenly under the influence. 
you just couldn't seem to think straight when you were with her. 
you didn't know when it got this far, but you honestly felt more for rosé than you ever could for your husband. every little thing she did seemed to bring you to another level of ecstasy, she knew your body too well. you felt so shitty whenever you had to face your husband, whenever you had sex with your husband you couldnt help but imagine it to be rosé fucking you instead. 
sex with rosé was usually fast and rough, never slow and sweet. for this reason rosé’s attitude today came as a surprise to you, the way she took her time to fully appreciate every part of your body  was something you’d never complain about. the softness of her hands along your body was truly an out of body experience. 
the whimpers and moans that left your lips were music to rosé’s ears. “p-please, n-no more t-teasing…” the way you tangled your hand in rosé’s hair, slightly tugging when you said that only served to spur rosé on into teasing more. she continued on with her painfully slow pace, fully allowing herself to enjoy your breasts. her hands firmly gripped your hips, stilling them and holding them down when she noticed you were bucking your hips up to meet her thigh. “patience, darling.” she chuckled out, licking downwards, stopping at your thighs. 
she drew shapes with her tongue on your inner thigh, getting close to where you needed but never quite reaching there. you were soaking. you needed her so badly, yet she seemed to be taking all the time in the world to reach where you needed her most. you tried to buck your hips up into her face yet you were stopped by the tight grip she had on your hips. you whined out in desperation not sure if you could handle another minute of teasing. tears formed in your eyes out of frustration, you needed her so bad. 
seemingly taking pity on you, rosé trailed her kisses up, sucking marks into your very inner thigh before leaving. her lips went up until they reached your most private part, she licked a broad stroke across you, tasting your arousal. she trailed her hands down to your inner thighs, giving them a small squeeze before spreading your legs open.
your moans at her actions were immediate, not being able to control yourself after being teased for so long. the feeling of her wet tongue on you was taking you to heaven. she slowly circled your clit with her tongue, one of her hands coming over to aid in what she was doing. she slowly eased a finger into your wet heat, her tongue on your clit never stopping. she groaned at the feeling of you clenching around her finger, the vibration it sent through your body had your eyes rolling. 
The wet sound of your arousal along with your moans filled the room, the lewd sounds turning rosé on more than she’d let on. “m-more, p-please, more..” abiding to your pleas, she eased in another finger, sucking harder on your clit. simultaneously, she snuck a hand down her own body, pushing her own underwear to the side to circle her clit. 
the vibrations her moans sent through your body alongside her unrelenting fingers were bringing your orgasm quicker than thought. rosie, seeing the tell tale signs that you were going to cum rosie was quick to still all movements on you. “not until i say, okay?” her hand on herself never stopped, just like her gaze on you didn't waver until you nodded in compliance. she licked her fingers that were previously in you and replaced them with her tongue, her hand, still wet with her spit trailing itself up to grope your breasts. 
you could feel your release building up, the feeling overwhelming you, yet you knew better than to cum without permission. “p-please, n-need to…” you couldn't say more nor tried to say more. you knew she understood.
“do you? how badly?” the question was a simple one really, but you couldn't seem to find the energy to form real words. your whines and grinding was met with a slap to your thigh “i'm not gonna repeat myself.”
“n-need it so bad, p-please need t’ c-cum, p-please!” once you opened your mouth, moans and pleas of her to just let you cum already couldn't seem to stop tumbling past your lips. lucky for you though, because rosé could also feel herself getting near.
“cum for me.” it was muffled due to the way you were squeezing your thighs around her head, but you heard it. her tongue in you never stopped, waiting for your release. with the permission of rosie, you finally allowed yourself to let go, a scream leaving your throat. rosé’s moans from her release were muffled, but definitely felt, helping you ride out your orgasm as she finished hers. 
you loosend your thighs that were wrapped around her head, with her head being free she pulled herself up and laid next to you in bed. “I love you.” she breathed out, licking her lips which carried your leftover arousal. 
“I'll send him the divorce papers tomorrow.”
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dreamworksoverdisney · 3 months
Text
I imagine that Ultra-dad totally meant to tell Kenji about being an alien at some point (if he hasn't already) but he kept putting it off.
First he wanted to wait till Kenji was a little older but then he moved halfway around the world,
He wanted to tell him when he became Ultraman but Kenji still wasnt talking to him.
And then with his training and baseball and taking care of Emi, there just never seemed to be a good time to drop the "your dad is a alien" bomb.
He'll tell him... one day.
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