#not saying harris would have been good or bad or anything else... I'm saying she would have been a fuck of a lot less annoying
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medicinemane · 1 month ago
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There's honestly... just so many people, just so so so so so many people in this world where I'm like... aren't you people tired of this fucking... you know, I was going to call them clowns but that's really disrespectful to clowns, these people could never get their face on an egg...
Anyway, aren't you tired of this childish jackass? Don't you just want to ignore them and never have to hear about them again? If we just ignored them they legitimately would go away... don't you want that?
And this applies to... just ungodly amounts of people, from jake paul to even elon musk (just... don't touch his shit, he'll run out of money eventually with how bad he is with it), to just... name an annoying famous person and you'll name someone I've literally forgotten right now that I could never have to hear about again if people would just ignore them (unless they committed crimes, investigators are welcome to pay attention while gathering a case)
Yet the answer's always "no, we're paying so much attention to them!" and I'm just like... why? Why would you watch jake paul box? I heard about that and was like "he's still doing that shit?", and yet I guess it made a lot of money yet again and it's just like... ignore him
These people could go away, and yet
#to be blunt this is also very very very much about trump#the best part of all if he'd lost is how I'd never have had to see or hear about his loser ass again#and you people couldn't even manage that (collective you; not you personally... unless you're Pennsylvanian basically)#like he's insufferable... unless you're a die hard fan of him you know he's just stupid and annoying#why would you want to hear a washed up reality star for four more fucking years?#we could ignore these people hard enough to make them go away#and yet I'll be stuck having to hear him say shit about Hannibal or whatever for four more years cause you couldn't do that#I'm so sick of it; I honestly am#jake paul could have been ignored into obscurity like a decade ago; and yet he's able to launch a scam with mr beast#like dear god... can't you people find something better to do than watch these people? ...like watch paint dry?#it's not just people; it's every live action disney remake; it's... it's just all of it... fucking ai#can't you people fucking ignore it? can't you just kinda boo when it shows up and then forget about it?#I get someone like elon is a toddler that needs an eye kept on him to make sure he's not breaking shit but like...#we could just not buy his cars... which... like... doesn't seem like a hard ask given how badly they're manufactured#again... weirdos on tumblr; I'm doubting you're to blame for most of this#but just like... could we just for the love of god let the stupid shit die out you losers?#I'm not even... I'm not even joking here; this isn't like a goof; this is a prescription#nfts die if literally everyone ignores them; live action remakes die if no one watches them; elon goes bankrupt if no one buys from him#(also gets really sad because he's a massive attention seeker; and that's pretty funny so bonus)#why do I still have to hear about jake paul other than like... 'he's been arrested for fraud' or something reasonable?#could have been done with him years ago... like maybe if you kept around one or two bad habits but... like the lootboxes couldn't go?#tune in; turn on; drop out... this part here; I'm asking you to do the drop out part#drop out of society and stop playing their bullshit games#pay attention; be engaged with the world and your community as best you can; and just stop... stop giving this shit oxygen#but again... if this isn't hitting the void it's probably hitting the choir... you're not an oaf on twitter sucking this stuff up#but fuck me... worry over tariffs and other shit aside; concrete quantifiable worries I can lay out I might add#for the people who act like it's just sky is falling mentality; nah... I can expressly say what and why I worry about come january#but all that aside... you couldn't have voted against him just... just to never hear his annoying ass again?#not saying harris would have been good or bad or anything else... I'm saying she would have been a fuck of a lot less annoying#and like... you gave elon a win too... the two most annoying people on the planet and ya couldn't just... not
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medusaesque · 5 months ago
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Kim's itchy trigger finger
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So, Kim reaches for his gun often. Very often. sometimes for the most ridiculous reasons- opening the bear fridge, the experiment in the church, a note from Klaasje.
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This one is just from being anxious going into the communist reading group. Kim doesn't want to be the kind of cop who draws his gun constantly, who shoots instinctively, but he is, or at the very least it's very difficult for him to stop himself from becoming one.
Perhaps the most horrifying example is with The Pigs-
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Even if he KNOWS the gun isn't loaded, even if he knows it's safe, the instinctual muscle twitch could have ended in an unnecessary death. Kim is very well aware of that fact, and it's horrifying to him. @shufflerock-jam has this really good post about it, where they wonder how many of Kim's kills were unnecessary. "Something about a pair of traumatized cops, one fighting against shooting himself and one fighting against shooting everyone else".
At the end of The Pigs exchange, if Harry says she tried to kill him, Kim begins to interject, but stops himself and agree this situation could've been very bad. Then Empathy chimes in- 'He's trying not to think about how bad it could have been had the gun been loaded.' Which is the heart of the issue, right? that leads us to Eyes-
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This is such a fascinating background to give Kim as a character- not just losing his partner, which gives him the trauma and survivor's guilt that lead to this unhealthy relationship with his gun and frankly with death in general, but losing his Eyes, and having that not interfere with his shooting. Kim doesn't need to see well to hit, he doesn't need to think. It's all in his hands, a reflex. A reflex that nearly took an innocent life. That might have taken one before.
His awareness of looming danger, to him and to his partner, is fueling his version of Hand/Eye Coordination to have him constantly on edge, his whole body is like a loaded spring, always prepared to make sure it doesn't happen again. Then it does-
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In his nightmare scenario, leaning over his partner's bleeding body, Kim only needs one word to shoot without a second's hesitation. He's never not ready to take that shot. He doesn't need his Eyes.
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Harry is distraught to discover he's killed before- his body remembers it. He wants a drink to soften the feeling. Kim however is impressed with how little he's killed- especially coming from the bloody murder unit. He wants to be 'one of the good ones' (Kim's adamant belief in the possibility of a Good Cop is a whole other can of worms) the kind of cop he would think highly of. Kim is disgusted by cops who kill like it's a game. Espirit gives us a vision of a cop exactly like that, who kills so often it doesn't feel like anything anymore. In a way that is completely mechanical- no thought, no feelings, just a thing your body does. Not unlike the way Kim shoots- like a spring unloaded. Kim has 6 confirmed kills before the tribunal, double the amount Harry has. He doesn't react the same way though-
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It's doesn't bother Kim that he has killed, even if he declines to elaborate on it, and he seems to frown upon (or worry about) Harry's destructive coping mechanism. If they're unable to save Ruby, he says "Control your emotions. We did our job. This won't be the worst thing that happens on this case��� believe me. You can't let this break you." When you wake up after the tribunal, he doesn't dwell on the lost lives on either side. Harry's skills call him a killer, a bloodstained killer, but when he tells Kim he also killed he simply nods. He's smoking though. I'm not saying that Kim is heartless or careless, he's rattled by nearly blowing The Pigs' head off, very sorry for the lives lost during the case, and clearly hunted by death, having been surrounded by it for his entire life. But I do think death is a part of the job for him- not just possible civilian causalities, but his own potential death. He speaks plainly about how he might die in the lie of duty, and he narrowly avoided it more than once, with others dying in his place..
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He walked into the line of fire with harry expecting for of them to die, and his quick fingers on the trigger made it so they lived another day. Even if more ghost joined the list that hunts him in his sleep, he is alive. He goes on. He can't afford to fix this habit, as much as he wants to.
So it's so horrible and so touching that when Dros asks "What have you done?" Kim says-
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It's a tragedy, really. A wartime orphan who wanted to be a revolutionary pilot and played with Franconigerian knights, who grew up to be a cop, a job that slowly shapes his body into a killing machine. And when you ask what he does, what you both do, he says keep people alive.
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shurisneakers · 15 days ago
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unsolved (v)
Summary: Bucky doesn't even believe in the paranormal. So who the hell thought it was a good idea to stick him in a series about everything haunted for the internet's amusement? With his loose-canon of a teammate who has no concept of subtlety or shits left to give, to make things even worse. (Buzzfeed unsolved AU)
Warnings: swearing, frustrated bucky, obnoxious reader, witchcraft
A/N: it's like i never left amirite (im sorry it has been like 10 months pls forgive me ily guys let's pretend this series never went on hiatus) (i had cancer and college but now I've graduated from both and i live babyyy. anyway. welcome back to my house of horrors)
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Previous part || Series masterlist
When you tell Maya you want to do witchcraft, you'd done so with the full expectation of defending your idea with the force of a PhD student who was on the verge of a mental breakdown.
She surprisingly agrees. 
“Really?” It's hard to stop the astonishment from entering your voice. Honestly, it sort of pisses you off that the Canva presentation you spent five hours on wouldn't actually see the light of day.
“Yeah, sure. I think it'd do well with the older demographic. ” She shrugs.
"Really?" Now you weren't sure she was on the same plane of existence as you were.
“Make some animals talk. Conjure up some parking spots.”
Ah. 
“I was thinking more like... hexing people and shadow demons,” you test slowly.
That seems to tether her to reality.
Her head cranes towards you centimetre by centimetre, like she was buffering in real time.
“Are you insane?" she states, not very much sounding like she was expecting an answer. "Do you want to end up on the news? Do you know how vicious Facebook groups can be?” 
“No PR is bad PR,” you preach wisely, parroting advice you’d seen bots on Twitter tell other bots. 
“That doesn’t apply to you. I already have a tough time explaining Stephen Strange and why he’s not literally the devil to the public."
Now that was a little unfair. Perhaps it warranted another Canva presentation.
"Have you considered that I'm hotter and significantly cooler than Stephen Strange?" you suggest helpfully.
She squints at you, or more likely your audacity. "I will not have another scandal on my hands this week.” 
“But next week is okay?”
Her hardened stare tells you quickly what a thousand words cannot.
You cross your arms over your chest. “Thou limit me so, Maya. How is one to find you invigorating content in these trying circumstances?”
Maya taps your shoulder on her way out, crooning, “There’s a reason I asked you to do this series. You’ll figure it out.”
You hide a smile with an all too dramatic sigh. “Thou compliment me so. How am I to not fall in love with thee?”
Maya shakes her head playfully. “Nothing that will get me called into a press conference by mid-day. No hexing. No extreme curses. ”
“Mid-level curses it is, then” you call after her.
Her leaving figure does not give you a reply.
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After a week of staring at the corner of his room through the night, delirious to the point where he seriously considered using Sam’s Amazon Prime account to buy his own stupid ghost apparatuses, Bucky throws in the towel.
Clearly, he was mistaken. Sleep deprived and probably missing his family a little more than he would have ever admitted to a living soul.
Bucky's sleep deprivation adds to his already charming and sociable personality.
No one would touch him with a ten-foot pole. Bucky’s usually grumpy and while everyone had sort of built a tolerance towards his regular nonsense, he was now the very sexy combination of grumpy and sensitive.
For his part, after last week's shenanigans, Bucky has stuck to avoiding anything and everything horror.
He watches only romcoms and finds that while everyone says he seems most like Harry from Harry Met Sally, he hates that Mike Wazowski motherfucker with a passion. 
While everyone else seems to get the memo, you have chosen to ignore it blissfully, and have instead been prancing about all week, shoving meme after meme into his face.
Bucky Barnes smiling compilations that were 7 seconds long. Bucky Barnes social media fanfictions that showed him replying far more than he had ever replied to anyone in real life ever.
Bucky’s learnt to ignore you with a long-suffering glare. You adapt quickly, skillfully dodge the daggers shooting out of his eyes and shove another TikTok in his face. It is an edit of him to Toxic by Britney Spears. He doesn't want to ask where they got some of the footage they used.
After the fifth Twitter screenshot, he takes to avoiding you like the plague.
Unfortunately for Maya, that involved avoiding the set too. He sees on the official The Graveyard Shift channels that there’s an announcement put out about an episode delay. 
It is undeniably his fault. No, he still won't answer the group chat or the several knocks at his door every day.
But because the universe is invested in his sorrow, you seem to find him wherever he goes.
In the garden, digging through the vegetable bed.
In the storeroom, looking through oversized cookware.
When he walked into the alley behind the Tower and found you there, he hissed at you like a feral cat and you asked very loudly what the fuck was wrong with him. 
He checks every part of him and all his clothes for a tracker but no-- you just seem to have a karmic connection level of being exactly where he is. 
When he runs into you for the fourth time at the library, he really thinks he’s lost it.
“Are you following me?” he asks, voice sharp.
You look at him in wonder. “Your ego is so big it could have its own gravitational pull. How do you carry around your massive head all day?"
“Everywhere I go, you’re there.” He continues, finger pointing in accusation. 
“Bitch, you're the one who walked in here," you exclaim. "I’ve been here all day.”
“Doing what?”
“Who’s following who now?” you dare.
“Because you’re in this section.” He does a quick check to see what section it actually is. Witchcraft and Wizardry. He may not have known that when he accused you but he definitely was not wrong.
“Why do you care what I do here?”
Because he's wondering if he’s managed to shut down production permanently and sent a bunch of people into unemployment.
“I don’t trust you here," he settles on instead. "What are you actually doing?"
“I’m learning things. Gaining knowledge. And such." You gesture vaguely before you narrow your eyes at him. "Not that you would know, you ape.”
He scoffs. He had the intelligence of a thousand suns, mind you.
“You don’t even have a book," he counters.
“So? I’m gaining knowledge through osmosis.” You look around. “I’m absorbing.”
His nose twitches, teeth clenched.
“Whatever,” he mumbles instead, turning his attention to the bookshelf.
As he thumbs through various titles he’s too annoyed to read, a small movement catches his attention. 
He watches you from the corner of his eyes. 
“What?” you demand, this whole exchange too damn loud for a library. 
“What?” he challenges right back. “Why are you watching me?”
“Why am I– you’re the one staring at me.” You throw your hands up. “First you follow me here, second you accuse me of things that would get me burnt at the stake a couple of years ago, third you accuse me of watching you just 'cause you know you're pretty. You–”
Bucky narrows his eyes, not missing the random compliment you slipped in.
“Hold on just one second. That’s why you’ve been avoiding everyone all week.” You stare at him, wide-eyed and unrelenting.
He thinks he must have missed some part of the conversation because he has no idea why you're looking at him like you've figured him all out.
“That’s why you’ve been so jumpy and sleep deprived ever since that episode you filmed.”
Bucky’s gaze doesn’t waver, but his mind races and his breath falters for a second. There’s no goddamn way you knew what had gone down, he’d deleted every footage that could possibly–
“You missed me.”
He stops his overthinking right in its tracks.
“That’s it, isn’t it?” You tilt your head, face full of pure sympathy. “You filmed one episode without me by your side and realised you couldn’t live without me.”
“Fucking ridiculous,” he mutters, eyes pressed closed tighty, partially in relief. 
“You want me, don’t you? You want me so bad it makes you throw u–”
“Fuck off.” Bucky turns on his heel at the speed of light.
“You have a fat, raging crush–”  
“I’m fuckin' moving out.” His voice is like rocks.
“You can move out, but you can never move on, baby,” you whisper-shout. “When’d you realise you liked me, Bucky? Night one? The first hou–”
He slams the library door behind him. 
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From: Stevie Left some strawberries outside your door. They’re good. 
From: Stevie How are you doing today, by the way?
From: Bucky alive
From: Bucky and thanks 
From: Stevie Anything we have to talk about? Your wood chisels didn’t break again, did they?
From: Bucky nothing im fine
From: Stevie You sure? Time for a Cypress Hills visit?
From: Bucky no im fine 
From: Stevie You haven’t left the room in a week. Beat your old record and I'm going to start getting worried here.
Bucky stares at his phone wondering how he ended up with a mother a century after his own died, before sighing.
From: Bucky going to film a video this week. im fine
From: Bucky promise 
Because there really was no other way to convince Steve that he as leaving the cave he constructed from his comforter.
From: Steve Good to hear. I’m always across the hallway if you need anything. 
From: Bucky i know. your gramophone won’t let me forget it. 
From: Steve Dick.
From: Bucky it is too damn loud. old ass
From: Steve Got a new record. Haven’t listened to it yet.
From: Bucky ill be there in 10
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That Friday, Bucky walks onto the set in his finest black hoodie and darkest sunglasses, looking less like a badass and entirely like a hungover teenager. 
Before he has a chance to even register what’s going on, he is ambushed by lights, a team touching up his face and his stupid dollar store sunglasses leave him before he has a chance to protest.  
“I told you he’d show up,” you pipe up proudly from your place at the table. “Lil' shit simply missed me too–”
“Stop,” he interrupts, finally getting around to look at the set when the foundation brushes stop assaulting his line of vision. 
For a hot second, he thinks you've taken over Steve's cooking show. 
There are candles floating around, which he assumes you're holding up. A large… cauldron, gigantic wooden mixing spoons and 50 little bowls worth of ingredients are neatly arranged on the table.
“What the hell is going on?” he questions immediately. “What is all this?”
“Mise en place, baby,” you reply, shutting a book you had on the table loudly before looking at him. “You’re on dish duty. Come on.” 
“What?” His eyebrows pull into a frown. 
You dust off your hands before reaching under the table and chucking an apron at him. “Back when I worked as a line cook, the number one rule was to clean up as you go. I like to think of it as--”
“What is going on here?” he specifies, already trying to piece together your timeline in his head with every new piece of lore.
“Welcome to my kitchen, motherfucker.” Your grin is nefarious. “We're gonna do some witchcraft.” 
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After he spends fifteen minutes on the phone with Maya confirming that yes, that is indeed the episode and that the heads up he needed would have reached him if he opened the seventeen million messages on the group chat– he finally comes to stand behind the bench with you, a tick in his jaw but also with enough self-awareness to be sheepish. 
He thought his grand return to the channel would be a simple video with some ghost reading or whatever, not… this. 
He turns to you, ready to reach a compromise that ends with him not having to be there at all.
But in the fifteen minutes he had turned his attention to the call, you’ve somehow convinced them to start rolling before he gets the chance to leave, so he’s immediately hit with a--
“We’re on in three…two–”
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“Where is your apron?” you demand, looking him up and down.
“I’m not wearing that shit.” It had some stupid slogan like ‘Life is about taking whisks!’ and he had already been through enough.
“Jeez, annyone would think that you're not in love with me--"
"I'm not."
"--by the way you're so ungrateful. I got that custom-made for you,” you tsk. “I could've gotten the other one. Mine could've said ‘he’s my sweet potato’ and yours could've said ‘I yam’.”
Bucky experiences a whole-body chill. 
“Whatever," you dismiss with a wave of hand before looking into the camera. "Before we get started, we recognize that for some, witchcraft is a deeply meaningful religion and spiritual practice that should be approached with respect and curiosity.”
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“We’re not claiming this is the definitive guide to witchcraft, we’re simply trying out a book that’s been highly recommended for better or worse, and seeing where it leads us. Whaddya say, Bucko?
You look at him for input. Bucky stares at the dusty, hole-ridden monstrosity on the table.
“What’s it called?” Bucky asks finally after a long pause.
You tap the thick, old book. “Witchcraft for Weenies: A Totally Legit Guide to Authentic Witchcraft by A. Harkness.”
“Is that the actual name or are you just making it up?”  
“Rich coming from the only one between us who actually lied on camera--" you glare at him. "I would never fabricate my sources, I’m a champion for academic integrity.”
You pick up the book to show him, flipping it towards the camera too and sure enough, the book that was basically falling apart at the binding was called exactly that.
“Let’s-a go, baby.”
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You stare at him, lips pressed together. Bucky gives no inclination towards changing his answer. 
“Fine. We’re going to do this the hard way, I see.” You exhale, reaching into the pocket of your apron. 
Bucky’s eyebrows knit together when you brandish a deck of cards, yank his arm towards you and drop it into his open palm. 
“Shuffle," you command.
Something very familiar faces him.
Bucky stares at the cards before looking back at you. “Why’s my face on it?”
“It’s a tarot deck I got from Comic Con,” you insist. “Avengers themed. Now shuffle it.”
He thinks you left that card on top on purpose, but regardless, he's already been too much of a menace to the crew to be the cause of any more disturbance.
So he slowly begins, careful and skilled, before you scoff in his face.
“Faster, grandpa," you chide. “I’ve seen the way those hands cut garlic when no one’s around, I know you move faster than that.”
Bucky rolls his eyes but complies anyway, shuffling the cards with the adeptness only a certain Jim Morita could have taught him in a dark tent to keep him awake on a night watch. 
“Faster,” you goad, face smug. “Faster. Come on now, Barnes, your age finally catching up to you?”
It’s stupid– he doesn’t even know why he’s actually complying and increasing his speed. He can’t believe that he was letting you pressure him.
“C’mon, faster, Barnes, you abso-”
His hands were moving so fast by then that they’d have to put the video in slow motion to catch all the movement.
“Faster–” and in the commotion, a few cards fly out.
“Brilliant, thanks.” You slam them down on the table, plucking the deck out of his hand before he has a chance to process why the fuck he actually went ahead with what you were trying. 
“Right, so the universe has decided that these will be your cards,” you tell him, and he finally looks down at what had fallen out of the deck. 
The cards show Sam’s Captain America shield, Carol Danvers, and Spider-Man, with words written below.
“The Star, Six of Cups, The Hanged Man,” you read out thoughtfully.  
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Bucky rolls his eyes so hard he thinks they’ll fall out of his skull. 
“You know, I’m going to just make a general assumption and say you need help.” You hum to yourself. “I'm gonna make a potion to get you some.”
“Get me some?” He's too busy trying to figure out what the cards could possibly mean to see that he's walked straight into that one.  
“Get you some perspective. You need an advisor who’ll dish it to you straight. Give you the facts, no bullshit–”
"No." He had too many of those in his life and he has had enough of people being “honest” and "straightforward” and telling him his moustache was ugly every time he dared to try out a new look–
Until you reach under the table and again and suddenly, there’s a white creature buzzing around on the table in front of him.
“Behold– your new advisor,” you announce.
From the corner of his eye Bucky can see the production team scrambling to figure out where the hell this was going. He lip-reads producers’ orders to find adoption links or resources to insert during post-production, and teasers on social media, to make this look more planned. Great, so no one was prepared-- it wasn't just him.
“Whose fucking cat is this?” He looks down at it, all white except for a few brown spots all around, green eyes and evil in her aura.
“Relax, I'll give her back when we're done.”
“Give her ba–” he echoes. “Where did you get her?” 
“The alley outside,” you coo, rubbing under her chin. “I checked and she doesn’t have an owner. But look at her, she’s meant to be here.”
Bucky looks at the cat. The cat looks back at him, irises narrowing into slits. His nose twitches. 
“You can’t just bring a cat–”
“Remember to adopt, not shop,” you say to the camera before clapping your hand. “Anyway. If my potion goes according to plan, she will be giving you unsolicited life advice for eternity.” 
“You will be unemployed, then,” Bucky manages to add while watching the chaos unfold behind the camera.
“Nonsense, I’m irreplaceable.” You grin. “Besides, you can't manufacture chemistry like this even in a cauldron.” 
You send him a flying kiss. His glower was as sharp as laser beams.
“Let’s get started.” You grin at the camera. 
Bucky tries to pet the cat. She hisses at him.
Well all-fucking-right then.
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One hour later, things have descended into madness of the most mundane kind.
It was precisely when you started telling him ten minutes in that a book had nothing on your instincts and raw intelligence that Bucky knew that this was going to shit. 
The cauldron was on an electric stove unlike the open fire demanded by the book because the team had enough foresight to know it would be a fire hazard.
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You toss in something that looks like cardamom but he isn’t sure at this point. He just wanted to get away from the bright lights and the strange smiling liquid boiling awai.
The cat sits obediently by your side, watching curiously. He is convinced that she is evil.
Unfortunately, Bucky has had to hold her back twice when she tried to stick her paw in to attack a bubble, and at this point, he doesn’t think he has it in him to do it a third time. 
You read the recipe as if it makes any sort of fucking difference now.
“We’re almost done,” you sing. 
Bucky nurses his headache.  “Don't give me hope.” 
“Put some more reegelbeetle seeds in,” you dictate. “This is gonna work, I can feel it.”
Bucky uses his free hand to do as you say. He doesn’t even think it’s the right one, he just reaches for whatever is closer to you and you don't seem to care either.
You toss in some more seeds, stir twice and then turn off the stove. 
“Boom.” You lift the spoon up, watching the thick liquid drip back. “This is either a talking potion or a hex.” 
"Hex to do what?”
“I think it activates dormant allergies.” You squint at the book that literally had no significance besides being a prop. “You got any?”
“No.” But it makes him think of Steve’s pollen allergies. 
“Oh. Well, then there’s only one outcome here.”
“Alright, here we go.” Of the gigantic pot that you’d just stirred, you fish the tiniest amount out on the smallest spoon he’d ever seen, which you also apparently stored in the vast space that was your apron pocket.
The cat watches you hold the spoon near its face.
It takes a sniff. Then two. Finally, after deeming it non-poisonous, it sticks out its tongue the tiniest bit and takes a lick.
The whole crew is silent.
Bucky’s hand is still pressing against his temples.
“Tell us your name,” you urge, voice hopeful.
The cat looks at Bucky, and for a second, something akin to understanding flashes in its eyes. It’s uncanny and weird and something about it unsettles him deeply. 
You seem to catch it too because you look at him in surprise. He looks back at you, face pulled into a frown. 
And for a moment, he wonders. If you'd somehow done it. Because there’s no fucking way–
Then it meows.
He exhales.
Your shoulders drop as you let out an “Aw, man.”
"Great. Goodbye. Like and subcribce to the bell icon," he calls out, dusting his hands against his pants.
Someone from the production crew sneezes.
Both of you turn to him immediately. 
At the same instant, someone else all the way on the opposite end sneezes again, and the whole crew turns to look at them, before another sneezes in the front.
“We did it!” you cheer.
“We didn’t do jack,” Bucky interjects immediately as the crew errupts into a cacophony of chatter and sneezes.  
“It’s a hex that activates allergies and they’re sneezing,” you point towards them with the spoon, triumphant.
“You threw fifteen fuckin' pounds of pepper in there,”  he argues. “You've turned this room into a sandstorm of dry spices. This proves nothing.” 
“I’ve connected the dots.” Your eyes shine, ignoring him.  
“You didn’t connect shit.”
“I’ve connected them.” 
Someone in the corner sneezes. He wonders if Steve’s allergies would be activated by the trace amounts of... cursed soup that he carries with him back to the floor. 
“Well, we can’t leave them like this, Bucky.” You look around, tsking. “We gotta make a reverse hex or something.”
“You can,” he says. “It’s called opening the windows.”
“Nope,” you pop the last syllable. “We’re making another potion. C’mon.”
“First of all, this is not a potion–” he begins, but is interrupted by a buzz on his phone, the screen lit up by a text on the groupchat. 
From: Maya I don’t give a shit if it’s placebo or not. Make a damn potion before you get sued for hexing employees. 
“Fine,” he grumbles. 
“Beautiful. Grab the ash sphinx flakes,” you brandish another big cauldron from fuck knows where.
Bucky stares at you, unmoving.
“Just get the oregano,” you sigh. 
The cat tries sticking her paw in the pot again.
Bucky feels a sneeze incoming.
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Whether the hex and subsequent anti-hex Maya forced you to make at gunpoint was real or not, is yet to be determined scientifically.
What actually does happen, is the damn apron you give him carries enough trace amount of your stupid experiment, that it somehow activates Steve’s very real pollen allergy. Bucky finds himself on edge for the rest of the day every time the man rattles the walls with his middle aged dad sneezing.
It carries on over to his show, which means Steve’s episode on baking a 1950s chocolate cake from tomato soup is edited extremely strangely to cut out every sneeze.
Which means Nat’s episode on spy inaccuracies in Argylle takes twice as long to film because they have to take a few seconds every time Steve’s sneezes interrupt her from the set next door.
Which means Bruce’s video on the science behind memory is delayed on shooting.
All in all, something does seemed to have been hexed, but it mostly seems to be everyone’s fucking productivity.
Finally, everyone manages to get through the day, and the videos are sent to post production.
The same night when everyone’s gathered at the dining table to commemorate the end of another shoot day, Bucky slips out, knowing that Steve would save him a slice of pizza if he never returned. 
He goes back to the library to return his copy of Understanding Wood Finishing, when his curiosity leads him back down a familiar path. 
It’s where he finds you again, in the same corner as the last time, on the floor, surrounded by shelves.
“You again.” You quirk an eyebrow when he appears from the shadows. "Aren't you supposed to be eating pizza?"
“What are you absorbing now?” he asks, voice low for once, respecting the sanctity of the library now that day had slipped into night and everything seemed a bit more solemn now.
“Nothing,” you answer.
“Then why are you here?” 
He figured you’d be out there, introducing everyone to the cat that was now set to be roaming the halls, before someone assumed it was a shapeshifting enemy and dealt with it accordingly.
“God forbid someone get some peace and quiet for once,” you mumble. “It’s too loud out there.”
Oh.
You don’t say anything else, leaning back against the bookshelf with your eyes closed.
There really isn't a need for more words. He gets it. 
The understadning leaves silence in its wake. Bucky doesn't really have anything to say.
“Did you come here just to stare at me?” you ask finally. “Did you finally admit your feelings?” 
“Jesus Christ,” he groans. “I’m not in love with you.”
“Only a matter of time.” You smile before changes to something more subdued, a bit more serious. “You wanna talk about what’s actually been bugging you for the last week?”
Bucky looks at you wearily. “The tarot cards tell you something?”
You eye him. “Not more than what’s obvious. Wanna talk about it?”
He swallows, throat suddenly feeling like it's closing in on itself. 
“No.”
“Alrighty.” 
You say nothing more than that, leaving the both of you in relative quiet, save for the buzz of the warm fluorescent light above. 
Bucky takes an awkward seat next to you on the floor.
You pry open an eye to look at him in suspicion.
“Y’mind?” he manges.
“Mind what?”
He gestures to himself uncomforably, readiy to jump up and leave at any second.
You observe him for a second, and for once he stares back with no irritation in his look, just permission.
“No, you can sit.” You close your eyes. “So long as you don’t tell anyone else 'bout this place.” 
If there’s anything Bucky’s good at, it’s keeping a secret. 
He settles back into the shelf with an exhale, letting the weight of day roll off his shoulders.
You wordlessly slide a thermos towards him. He doesn’t even have to open it to know it’s the damn soup from that afternoon.
And if he’s being honest, it doesn’t taste that bad at all. 
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jarofstyles · 10 months ago
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The Favor 3
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hey... :) I know I've kept you waiting and I'm ready to hand her over to you. Here is the long awaited part 3!
Check out our Patreon for early access to new parts and 100+ Exclusive writings
The Favor Masterlist
WC- 10k
Warnings-dom/sub dynamic, oral sex, sprinkle of degradation, soft Dom h, face fucking, hair pulling, choking, h's filthy mouth, cumplay, etc.
---------
Y/N still had shaky knees by the time she got home that night. They hadn’t gone much further than that, his lips giving her a reward of kisses on her lips and neck as he had her lounge in his lap. To get used to his touch, he had claimed. It didn’t matter to her considering she felt like she was a bit touch starved and he was happy to supply his fix. 
Danny wasn’t a bad boyfriend. She didn’t want to paint him in a bad light- but he didn’t do all the things she had originally expected. He didn’t cuddle her as often as she’d liked and claimed he ‘slept hot’ so he didn’t hold her in his sleep when she slept over. A year into their relationship and she was thinking maybe he was just getting a bit too comfortable.
She was trying not to let it go to her head, how good it had felt to have Harry’s big hands on her body and little kisses pressed to her. How he had been gentle but dominant with her, reminding her to give her his eyes, his words, her lips. He’d kissed her like it was his job and made her head spin, but she figured he must have a lot of good practice on how to be a good kisser. 
When the phone rang the next day and she saw it was Danny, part of her didn’t want to answer. She still felt off about the fact he was okay with someone else touching her so intimately and made her feel so bad about wanting things in the bedroom, but the thing that bothered her the most was just how much she liked Harry touching her. She didn’t know much more about him but he had planned on her coming over to see him this weekend. They were going to actually play a little bit and that excited her to no end. There was no idea on what it was exactly they were going to do, but she knew she would do it for him. 
“Hi.” She said when she finally picked up on one of the last few rings. “Sorry, I’m making food.” It wasn’t a lie. The water was on for pasta. 
“It’s okay. I was just calling to ask how it went.” He said easily. It stung a bit, honestly. She clenched her jaw, unsure how he could be okay with her sleeping with someone else. Did he not know how intimate it was? How safe she had to feel? Clearly not, or she doubted he would let her do this. 
“Went good. He’s really nice and patient.” She mumbled.
“Oh, good. He’s a good guy, even if his tastes are questionable.” 
The girl felt herself stiffen. What the fuck? That wasn’t nice to say. Not about Harry and not about her. She was going to him for her ‘questionable’ tastes, and he never made her feel bad about it. 
“Yeah, well. I’m seeing him this weekend. We’re taking the learning thing slow.” Her fingers picked at the hole in her jeans. “I just wanted to let you know. I’m not really… Comfortable sleeping with two people at once. So I think we need to hold off on our sex together while I do this.” It made her feel icky. Not that there was anything wrong with it, per say. But she didn’t like the idea of him touching her right after Harry. 
“Oh.” He paused. “Okay. That’s fine. Are you still coming out to the bar this weekend though? Or are you and Harry going to be in his sex dungeon.” Now she was irked. Part of her had hoped for maybe a tiny smidge of jealousy. Maybe showing that he cared that she would be spending a lot of time with another man- but nothing. He breezed right past it.  He also talked about Harry in a way she didn’t like the more it happened. Reducing him as solely a man who was a sexual deviant wasn’t nice, or true. He had a dog, he did woodworking, he had a nice house and obviously a good job. He liked music, had vintage band posters in immaculate condition hung up in his hallway. It wasn’t just about who or what he did in the bedroom. 
“Don’t know. I’ll ask Harry.” She mumbled. Since she seemed to be his fucking girl for the time being. “Listen, I’ve got to go. I’ll call you later, yeah?” 
There was barely any time to hang up before she sniffled, eyes closing as she tried to fight the tears. She’s really hoped that maybe she would get an inkling of care or jealousy out of him. He must not have a clue about any of the things they were going to do, the trust it involved, the intimacy. Harry was teaching her slowly and he was gentle and kind while also keeping the dominant persona up. It made her melt. 
So instead of calling her boyfriend back and crying to him, she took her phone out to text Harry. 
Y/N: hiiiiii. 
H: Hello. 
Y/N: I had a question if that’s okay? 
H: I have an answer, hopefully. Shoot. 
Y/N: what exactly did you have in mind for this weekend? 
Y/N: am I staying multiple days? 
Y/N: trying to figure out the packing situation. :-) 
Harry smiled down at his phone in his office. He was doing some emails but had abandoned them when he saw her name flash on his screen. He was thankful to hear from her, even more so that she was thinking about this weekend. She wasn’t having second thoughts. 
H: Yes, multiple days. I was thinking you sleep at mine Friday and Saturday, spend some of the Sunday with me. 
H: it’s up to you ultimately. In this situation, you’re in charge with how much or how little time you want to spend with me. It isn’t all going to be whips and chains, perhaps some food breaks in between. 
Y/N: he’s got jokes? 
H: a few. Don’t tell anyone. I can’t lose my mysterious persona. 
Y/N: my lips are sealed. 
Y/N: I told Danny I wasn’t going to have sex with him while I’m doing stuff with you. 
Y/N: we didn’t do it a lot anyways but it feels wrong to do that when we’re doing the things we do. Is that okay?
Was it okay? Harry could feel the smirk on his face, painted there without his permission. It shouldn’t feel so good that she cut him off in order to spend time with him, but it did. He was still astounded that he was willingly letting this happen but now that he’d had a taste of Y/N, he wanted to continue. He’d teach her everything there was to know. 
H: It’s perfectly fine. Anything that makes you comfortable, remember? 
H: it’s probably best, anyways. You went for your testing, yes?
Y/N: yes sir 🫡 bright and early. Should have the results by Friday!!! 
H: perfect. I’ve got mine done up too. You’re still on birth control too? 
Y/N: mhm, I’ve got an IUD. 
H: ouch. I heard those hurt to put in. But thank you for telling me. 
Y/N: it sure isn’t fun. We should probably be put to sleep but they don’t care lol 
H: I know. It’s a shame. I’m sorry that it hurt. 
Y/N: it’s okay :-) no oopsie baby for me!!! 
Y/N: are you planning to… you know… inside me? 
That was something she hadn’t thought about, but the thought was making her hot now. She’d never not used a condom before, always heard it was messy to not, but something about it felt… erotic. Like being marked and claimed. Something that he could play into when they were doing a scene. 
H: if you’d be comfortable with it, I’d love to. But it’s up to you. It’s your body and I respect what you want with it. 
Yep. He had decided that he wanted to do that with her. Already he was breaking his normal limits but the idea had a strong hold on him. Especially knowing now that she wasn’t going to be sleeping with  anyone else while they were together, it made him feel even more inclined to bend the rules he usually made for her. It was just… he wanted to give her everything. Let her experience the true intimacy of it. Plus he couldn’t deny the idea made him hard as stone. 
H: though… overshare? I am partial to the idea of watching your cunt drip with my cum. 
Y/N: I hope you know I’m blushing.
She was more than blushing. She was starting to get wet from the mere mention of it. Harry seemed to like to be blunt that way and there was something so hot about it, he had no fear of saying what he wanted. No matter how crass it may be. 
Y/N: I think I’d like that, though. If everthing is good with my results- which they should be fine- I’m okay with that. I’ve never done it. 
Harry felt himself twitch in his pants behind his desk. A groan audibly left his mouth as he placed his phone down for a moment, running his hand over his face. He shouldn’t like the knowledge he would be the first one bare inside of her. He would be the first one to cum in her. Fuck, he hated how much he loved the idea of it. This wasn’t his girl, wasn’t his to keep, but he was playing pretend like she was. 
H: good to know, pet. I’m excited to explore with you. 
H: you’re a lot of fun, you know that? 
Y/N: I didn’t know that :-) thank you for telling me. I’m really looking forward to seeing you this weekend. 
H: the feeling is mutual, darling. Very much so. 
—-
Y/N felt the familiar tingle of nerves when she pulled into his house. He’d given her the gate code this time, which she punched in and drove herself through as the house took away her breath again. What she wouldn’t do to live in a house like this. It was a Pinterest dream. 
Parking her car to the side, she grabbed her duffle bag and rounded the side to find Harry waiting at his garage door once again. 
God, he was handsome. 
He wore an open baby pink button up with a white tank top underneath and black trousers sitting higher up on his waist. His smile was soft as he watched her approach, stubble a bit more grown out than she remembered and his hair tousled in a sexy off hour type of vibe. To put it lightly, he looked like a model off duty and she felt a bit intimidated. This man found her attractive? She wasn’t insecure that way, but it was admittedly a stroke to her ego. 
“Hi, Darling.” He hummed, reaching out to take her bag from her. “Drive alright?” His eyes scanned over her in appreciation. A dress, one that flirted over her thighs. A soft pink with a subtle floral pattern, cap sleeves and a sweetheart neckline, flat shoes and a little pearl necklace. “You look adorable.” She really did. The picture of flirty innocence, making him heat slightly when he realized she wore this for him. She had to of, considering he was the person she planned on spending the day with. 
“You think?” The girl beamed, looking down at her outfit. “Thank you. I wasn’t sure what to wear or what the plans were. I wanted to look… presentable.” She could feel her cheeks warming from how intently he looked at her. It was unlike what she was used to, like he was drinking in the details. If he looked at her like this now, how would she feel when she was completely bare? “The uh, the drive was alright. Thanks for asking.” She looked at her bag on his shoulder. “You didn’t have to take the bag, I can carry it!” 
“Cute. No, my mother raised me right. Shouldn’t be carrying a thing, especially when you’re coming to stay with me.” He extended a hand. “C’mon, so you don’t catch a chill. Buttons is waiting for you.” The way her face lit up at the mention of his dog made something in his insides soften, her delicate hand slipping into his own and trusting him to lead. Harry knew he was lucky to spend this sort of time with her, and he wasn’t going to risk wasting a moment. All he’d been able to think about during the week was how she had felt under his palms.
As expected, his hand was dropped as they got inside and he said the release command for Buttons, letting her say hello to the excited animal. He whined and went in circles as Y/N giggled, brushing her hands over him and telling him in a soft voice that she had missed him so much. He had to check himself when he found it a bit too cute. Seeing her be this sort of soft was beyond attractive. “Do you want me to put this away on my own, or did you want to come with me?” He said after a few moments. 
“Oh! May I come?” She looked up at him with soft eyes, kneeling on the floor. The vision was marred by his own filthy vision, imagining this exact scenario with a vibrator tucked inside of her needy pussy, tears in her eyes and his cock slipped from her mouth. He felt himself twitch in his trousers, trying to clear the rasp he knew would follow.
“There she goes. Asking for permission already.” His hand came down to stroke her hair, watching her eyes widen as she saw exactly what it was that she said. Her mouth opened to apologize, but he merely shook his head. “I like it, sweetheart. You look good like this.” 
Y/N was burning between her thighs. It was the fastest she thinks she’d ever been aroused in her life. There was an intensity that radiated from him and a heat that crackled between them at her body reacted to his words. She hadn’t meant it like that, no. It was her trying to be polite, but this view was to her favor, too. Seeing him tower over her, his hand stroking her hair like she was the pet, feeding into a bit of a fantasy she had barely explored. That was the point of them, wasn’t it? It was just…. Y/N hadn’t expected for it to feel so good right off the bat. Had tried to write off their kisses and exchange last time as just initial excitement. It was clear now that it was far more than that. “Sorry.” She peeped, unsure of what else to say. 
“None of that.” His scold was gentle as he twirled a lock of hair around his finger. “No apologizing when you’ve done nothing wrong. You’re being a good girl for me already, Y/N.” The praise was sweet falling from his lips, smirk growing as he watched her clench her thighs in what she thought was probably a discreet manner. Buttons had ran off to his toy basket to play, losing interest once Y/N’s hands had fallen from him, but she stayed in her position. Did she even realize what a natural she was at this? When she’d expressed concerns about ‘not being good’ at this last time after this kissing had slowed, he’d been positive she was the perfect person for it- but this proved it.  
The girl took a shaky inhale, smile painting her lips as she looked up at him with hesitancy. “May I get up?” Testing it out. It was difficult because all she wanted to do was please him, and she knew he’d written out terms but… she’d just walked in. It hadn’t been her intention to fall right into it, but they had. She wasn’t quite sure what to say about that. 
Raspberry lips twitched as he let out a breathy laugh, nodding his head. “Very nice. Yes, you may. C’mon.” His hand was extended to hers and he helped lift her up, steadying her as she blinked at him. He merely gave her a comforting look before taking her hand in his again and leading her up the stairs. “Now, I’ve got two options. You can stay in the guest room, settle in there… or you can stay in my room, with me.” It was a loaded question, he knew. “You’re welcome to change your mind about either at any time, of course. It’s up to you.” 
Y/N hadn’t expected the option to actually sleep in his bed with him. That felt… intimate. More intimate than she would have thought, but from what she had been taught so far? The whole thing was intimate. They weren’t doing just a scene, he was teaching her about this lifestyle and she felt excitement bubble in her tummy at the prospect of waking up next to him. He treated her so nicely like this. Surely, he was going to be a bit mean when they played and she craved that- but she had been craving that sort of intimacy desperately. Was it wrong to get her fill whilst she was here? 
“May I sleep with you?” She asked with slight hesitation. It was also up to him, and though he had offered,  she wanted to know his own preferences. “Is that something you’d like?” It was his house, she didn’t want to put him out. 
And truthfully? Usually, he didn’t really care either way. Sometimes he got a bit itchy for alone time when it came to other arrangements he’d had but the man really couldn’t imagine being sick of Y/N. Not wanting to rub his hands all over her and have unadulterated access to her. To see her sleepy and soft in the morning light, see how he could mold her into his own body and possibly have a bit of morning sex. “I’d enjoy it if you did, yes.” He hummed, trying not to show his bias too much. Ultimately it was her decision to make. 
“Okay.” She looked at him cautiously. “Then… I think I’d like to do that. Please.” Adding in the extra manners surely seemed to work in her favor, his smile brightening at it. It made her tummy flip flop, watching him look at her like that. It made her want to get more of it. 
He’d shown her the guest room she could use anyway in case she wanted time apart from him- though he hoped that wouldn’t be the case- before opening the double doors to his bedroom. 
It was a bit of a grand show off way, but he’d always liked the look of a suite. The doors opening and a tiny mini foyer before a hallway, opening up to the large bedroom. Hardwood floors and cream colored walls, a walk in closet to the left and the bathroom to the right as they walked through the hall, which he pointed out. His actual bedroom was quite large, with a fireplace, television, bookcase, large windows… the bed was on an elevated platform with four posters at the end. Her mind buzzed, knowing it was the perfect set up to tie her up. Leave her helpless. The dark red bedding popped against the cream and hardwood, somehow fitting his personality perfectly. It was clean, comfortable, but lived in. 
“Wow, Harry. It’s gorgeous.” Her hand left his as she walked further into the room and looked at whole thing. The loveseat by the windows and bookcase, the incredible view over the hills. It was hard to imagine what this house would cost, but she had to think it was way more than she could fathom. He walked up to the bed and placed her bag there, arms crossed as he watched her pad across the room and take in details. 
He liked the sight of her here. Her hair falling down her back and bouncing as she moved, she enjoyed the decor he put up and told him so. Harry did wonder if it was smart, keeping her in here with him. If he wasn’t going to set himself up for something painful considering he already felt a bit more for the girl than he should, but he couldn’t stop himself. Rationally he knew that she would probably go back to Danny after this was over and she had her ‘fill’ but… part of him hoped she wouldn’t. Even if she wasn’t with him, but someone who would give her what she wanted. What she needed. All without making her feel poorly about herself. 
His hands itched as he watched her bend over to look at a photo frame on the bookcase, eyes falling down to her dress as it rode up and exposed the softness of her thighs. It was short, the dress, and he wondered if she’d done it on purpose. What she was wearing underneath all of it. Part of his mind wanted desperately to call her over, taunt her about the fact she was teasing him and fuck her throat as a ‘punishment’- but he didn’t want to scare her by moving too quickly. Instead, he would give himself a reward for his self control. 
“Y/N? Come here please.” He stood by the bed and watched as she perked up, trotting over to him with a questioning look on her face. She didn’t do a thing to stop him as his hand cupped her chin, tilting her face up so he could look at her. “You’re still happy to be here, yeah?” His voice was soft as he tried to read her reactions.
It was hard for her to think when he held her this way, but she nodded insistently. “Of course. I’ve… I’ve been looking forward to it all week.” She admitted. It had been the whole week of texting and check-ins to make sure she had good days at work and it had become a routine she really liked. Their kissing and his firm tone had haunted her mind the entire time, making her crave more of it. 
“Yeah? You have?” He hummed. “Should have known. You’ve been a sweet girl since I’ve met you, but… I didn’t expect this out of you.” His thumb ran over her bottom lip. “It’s a welcome surprise. Though I never thought I’d find myself in this position with you… I’m glad you’re trusting me enough to help guide you.” It made him feel really fucking good, honestly. Yes, Danny may have suggested it but she was the one with the choice. “I just want to remind you that if you’re ever uncomfortable, you safe word for me. If you want me to stop, tell me. If I’m too mean and you’re hurt, if anything I do hurts past the point of pleasure, if you’re panicking? Stop me. I’ll never, ever be angry with you for doing that.” 
Y/N seemed to be the type to try and push through true discomfort to appease people. He didn’t want that with him. Of course, he would be pushing many limits. Physically and emotionally. But he didn’t want to cross those. It was a large responsibility any time he took a sub, but this was the biggest one yet. Someone he already knew and cared for, even if it was minor- and it was her first time dipping her toe into it. He was setting the tone for her experiences. It was a bit scary, though he’d never tell her that, but he was up for the challenge. “Promise me you’ll do that. For me. Not just as a dominant but as your friend and someone who cares for you.” He sighed, giving her a firm look. 
“Promise. I promise, Harry.” She murmured, understanding the gravity of what he said. He took her safety seriously and he cared for her. “I’ll be a good girl for you. Swear it.” 
Harry grinned, nodding his head. “I know you’ll be a good girl for me, pet. Knew it since you’ve walked in. You jus’ want to make me happy, don’t you?” His tone shifted, just slightly enough to make her body buzz. It was smooth, something reminiscent of last time she was here. At her nod, he let out a breath and smeared his thumb over her bottom lip again. “Good. You know…. Been thinking about these all week.” Her mouth, she realized. Something turned in her stomach and erupted into butterflies, eyes on his face as she tried to decipher what was going on in his mind. “M’gonna feed you and make sure you’re comfortable in a moment, but can I taste you again?” He hummed. “Do I need permission to kiss you this weekend, or is it something you’ll let me take as I please?”
The butterflies melted in her stomach, settling lower and heated her body up in a way she knew was arousal. Excitement. He was still so careful with her, tender, but she couldn’t wait until he was… less so. Until he took what he wanted, like he said, made her bend to his will. Told her what to do. Boss her around. But she understood he couldn’t read her mind and how she was fucking gagging for him to use her, to touch her, so she nodded. 
“Words, Pet. Remember?” He raised an eyebrow and made her breathing catch as his grip on her face tightened. 
“Sorry- sorry. Yes. You can… you can do whatever you want. I like when you kiss me.” She peeped, knowing that she was handing herself over to the man on a silver platter with all the dressings. “I want that.” 
“There we go.” He cooed. “So good. Thank you for correcting that- don’t make me remind you again.” His face got closer to hers. “I’m glad our wants seem to be in agreement.”
Y/N’s brain went haywire as his lips pressed to hers before it went quiet. So quiet, so smooth as his mouth sipped at hers ever so gently before applying a bit more pressure. Her face was still firmly held between his fingers as he kissed her, her hands falling to his button up and curling into the fabric as she did her best to return the kiss the way he wanted. She’d never been kissed like this, where it was so abundantly clear that he was in charge. There was no fighting for dominance- Harry owned her mouth. 
When he pulled away, the whimper fell from her mouth and she pouted as he chuckled, wiping his thumb over the corner of her mouth to clean her up. “S’okay, darling. Don't want you too worked up yet.” He brushed his nose against yours. “M’gonna take good care of you and your needy cunt. Don’t worry about that. But I’ve got to get you unpacked and some food in your belly before I can make you cum. Need your strength.” He sighed, pressing one last peck to her lips before pulling back. “C’mon. I’ve got a drawer cleaned out for you and the second sink is yours. 
Y/N followed him on wobbly knees, wondering just how fucked she was going to be when this is how she felt from mere kisses. 
—-
Dinner was eaten with a comfortable chatter between the two of them. It was surprisingly easy to just…. Be. Harry was a comfortable person to be around and she thought maybe that’s why she felt the way she did for him. Preening at his praise for her new project she shared with him, like a pup waiting for a biscuit. She’d trailed him around the house, going outside with him to take Buttons on his walk after he ate dinner where he had shown her around his yard. His pool, jacuzzi, garden, the tennis court and rock climbing wall- he seemed to have the works, and she was very jealous. What she wouldn’t do to live in this sort of house. Thankfully she was spending time here now, getting to pretend this was her life. 
Standing on the deck, he whistled for Buttons to come back to them before turning to Y/N. “Think we’re getting close to having our fun together.” He hummed. “Tonight we’ll play a bit, get a feel for each other. Tomorrow, I’ll take you out for lunch. Then I was thinking…” he crossed his arms over his body and Y/N gawked at his arms. He was incredibly fucking hot. “I’ll take you to the toy shop. Let you pick something out to try. S’that something you’d be comfortable with?” 
Y/N had to admit she didn’t expect him to do any of that. Not take her out, nor to a sex shop to get a toy for her, but the thought made her dizzy. It was so nice of him, so thoughtful, and still slightly dirty. She loved the idea, really, especially to spend time with him. “Yeah! I’ve never… I’ve never been to one of those before.” Her admittance was quiet. “Always been too nervous to go on my own. He never liked the idea of going even just to look, so I’m excited that you’d be willing to take me.” 
God, Danny was a pussy, wasn’t he? You didn’t even have to be into kinky shit to go to a sex shop. Harry felt for her. Having that urge, that itch to scratch, and feeling like no one around you would accept you for it had to be an uncomfortable and lonely feeling.  “Well I have a favorite shop and money to be spent. So allow me to treat you this weekend, yeah? More than happy to do it and let you experience new things.” 
Y/N felt guilt at the prospect of him spending money on her, but he didn’t seem to be the type to take no for an answer. He’d had dinner ready for them, had helped her unpack her bag, ultimately taken care of her since she’d walked into the house. Even wiped the corner of her lip when she’d gotten a bit of sauce on it. It came so naturally between them that she knew she should probably be a bit concerned but she couldn’t be. Not with how good it felt. “Okay. I can- I hope you don’t feel forced fo pay for me. I have money I can spend too.” She peeped. “I don’t want you to think I’m taking advantage or anything. You’re the one helping me.” 
Harry clicked his tongue, brushing it off. “Well you’re the one letting me get wrapped in that snug little cunt eventually, yeah? Letting me throw you around a bit and have fun with you… so, that’s enough reason for me to want to do it.” He turned to her and pulled her against him, making her meet his eyes again. “For the time you’re alone with me, you’re mine. You told him he can’t touch you while you’re with me, yeah? M’the only one getting access to you like this?” 
“Yes, sir.” She breathed, feeling herself melt in his grip. His tone had changed and she felt it between her thighs as he held the back of her neck. 
“Then that settles it. I take care of what’s mine.” His mouth pressed to hers, stealing a kiss from her lips. “You’ve been doing well tonight. I think I want to play with you a bit now. Go upstairs to the bedroom and sit on your knees, right next to the bed. Hands in your lap.” The visible perk up made him want to smile, but he kept his face straight. Y/N was the prettiest thing, and he was more than looking forward to touching her now. 
Y/N was more than eager, pushing past the nerves and nearly jogging up the stairs as she made her way to his room. He’d lock the house up and settle Buttons for the night, and she would wait patiently for him. 
The hardwood was cold against her knees, but she did as he asked. Kneeling with her hands in her lap, she tried not to let her mind wander. Instead, she looked around the room and bought time as it rolled by. It was a bit uncomfortable, she couldn’t lie. She had to shift around, but the pain excited her a little bit. Her eyes had kept going to the clock by the bed, watching as 10 minutes passed. Each one made her more and more squirmy with the anticipation, but by the 13th minute she could hear his footsteps approaching and she settled into the final position, watching him walk towards her. 
The man looked tall. Powerful. Someone she had to give into. She craved it.  He stopped right in front of her, a gentle hum leaving his lips as he looked down, his hand coming over her head to caress her lightly. “Look at what a good listener you are, pet.” He murmured, fingers finding her cheek and brushing over them as she gave him her eyes. “This is a beautiful sight to walk into. S’where you belong, isn’t it?” His voice was… different. It held a different tone to it, a cadence that he didn’t have when speaking in other instances. It made her wet. “Belong on your knees, waiting for me to tell you what to do. Gorgeous”. He sighed, appreciating the view he had. 
“Yes, sir.” She whispered, mouth suddenly dry as her hands itched to grab his belt and pull him closer so she could feel more of his body heat. 
“You remember your safe word, sweetheart?” He asked, watching as she nodded. When she didn’t say anything else, his hand fisted her hair and tugged back, making her gasp loudly at the slight sting. It only made her feel hotter, mouth opening but failing to say anything. “What have I told you, hm? Told you to stop with the nodding and use your words, like a good girl.” He warned. 
“M’sorry, I’m sorry sir. Yes, I remember.” She winced as the grip on her hair lessened, missing it a little bit as his lips twitched up. Why had she liked that so much? He’d stolen her breath with that move, and they’d only just begun. 
“There we are. Don’t make me ask you again, or m’not gonna be as nice.”’he smoothed her hair back, taking a step forward. “I’ve been thinking about what I wanted to do with you. It’s exciting, you know? Having free reign over your body. A big responsibility, but it’s one I welcome.” Harry loved it now, seeing her reactions to him. She was doing her best to be good already. “It’s hard to plan when there’s so many things I want to show you. But I think we can have some of the basics now. Make use of those hands and take off my belt.” 
Y/N’s shaky hands gripped the belt and slipped the tongue through the loop, the metallic sound filling the otherwise quiet room. Getting the latch undone, she began to pull at it and watched as the leather ran through the loops until the accessory was off of his body. He didn’t say anything, merely stepping closer to her. So close that her mouth was inches away from his groin, making her excitement build. He was hard. She could see it, the print of him through the fabric, and she wanted to touch. 
“Look what you’ve done to me, darling. Got me hard just thinking about the filthy things M’gonna do to you.” He murmured, using his grip on her hair to pull her closer to him. Her nose brushed against his cock, Harry pressing her face against his pants with little effort. “Give me some kisses. Show me how much you want it.” 
One thing was certain- Y/N was eager. The man watched as she nodded, lips pursing against the fabric as she kissed from the base all the way to the tip. Her breath was warm and leaked through the fabric, making his stomach tighten a bit. What got him was the fact that he could tell she enjoyed this, even being nervous. She continued, keeping her hands in her lap like the good girl she was for him. “There’s my good girl.” He cooed. “Do you want to take them off? Want to make me feel good and wrap those puffy lips around my cock, suck me down?” He mumbled, watching as she nodded- though she paired it with words this time. 
“Yes, sir, I’d really like to. I want to make you feel good. May I?” She was a dream, really. Looking at him with pleading eyes, making him want to groan at how lucky he was to get such an eager little thing. He got to explore her fantasies with her and that was an honor. 
“You may. Go ahead and take my pants off- but don’t touch my cock until I tell you to.” Harry was impressed thus far. Y/N was doing an incredible job, and he could see it on her face. How she was leaning into this, that she was a natural at it. Like she was slipping right into a roll she was made for. Her hands were shaky as they pulled his zipper down, fingers gently tugging at the waistband and leading them down his hips. He didn’t offer much help, watching as they were quickly pulled down to his ankles and she looked back up at him, making him lift his leg to let her slip them off completely. “Excellent.” He praised, watching as her fingers went to his briefs but stopped, eyes widening as she caught herself. He hadn’t asked her to take those off. 
“I’m impressed.” He smiled, watching as she stayed where she was. “You were about to do something I didn’t ask for but you remembered. M’glad you caught that.” He could feel himself throbbing in his briefs though, and he desperately wanted her mouth on him. He’d been dreaming about it for days. “Go on. You can take those off.” Harry was arrogant at times, but the swell of his ego was massive as she pulled the fabric over his cock and her eyes widened at the sight of him. Her motions of taking the briefs off were even more hurried than the trousers, a little chuckle leaving his mouth. “Take me in your hand, give me a few tugs.” 
Y/N was gentle with it, her warm hand shaking slightly as she curled it around the base of his cock. It wasn’t often she would call a dick pretty, but if any she had ever seen deserved that title? It was his. Thick, slightly curved with a ruddy pink tip. Leaking a little bit, making her pant. She wanted it in her mouth. The deprived girl wanted him to push her down on him until her nose brushed the groomed thatch of hair on his groin that led up to a little happy trail. Never in her life had her mouth gotten wet to the point she thinks she could drool over the sight of something, let alone a person. “You’re so pretty, sir.” She whispered, giving him a stroke. He was hot in her hand and she could feel him twitch in her palm, scooting forward on her knees so he was directly in front of her face. 
“You think so?” He grinned. “Thank you, baby.” 
Baby. Baby. Baby? Y/N liked that nickname a lot. Of course she had been called that before, but something about hearing it from him in this context made her whine. Audibly whine, embarrassing the fuck out of her as she hadn’t meant to do it out loud. 
“Oh, you like that then? Sweet little baby.” The man crooned, stroking her hair back. “I have to admit… I didn’t expect you to be gagging for it like you are. But I’m pleasantly surprised.” He watched her pull his cock again, stroking with a gentle squeeze that made him exhale harder. “Prettiest baby, gagging for my cock. Are you going to let me down that throat, hm? Choke on me a little bit?” He purred, watching her eyes widen. “I know you will. But first, I want you to give me some kisses.” He was taunting her a little and he knew that, but he wanted to watch her squirm. 
“Yeah- I, I really want it Sir. I wanna make you happy.” She rubbed the tip over her lips, his precum wetting them in a filthy vision that had Harry wanting to curse. “Just tell me what to do. I’ll listen.” Soft, hot lips began to kiss up the length of him. Wet kisses, her lips curling around the sides as she pulled back and kissed the other side as well. She wasn’t precise with it, choosing instead to let herself be a little sloppy with her kisses and watch his reaction. 
“You are. Doing so fucking well, pet.” His praises made her smile against his length, which really was the filthiest, most lovely thing he’d ever seen. “You really are dirty, aren’t you? Don’t want to pull away from my cock so you smile on it. Do you think you can do it with me stuffed in your throat?” Realistically he knew she couldn’t- but her answer pleased him anyway.
“I’ll try anything for you.” She blinked up at him, resting the tip at her lips as she smattered kisses around the sensitive area. It took everything in her not to peek her tongue out and lick over the slit, but she had to be good for him. That’s all she wanted. 
“That’s what I like to hear.” He mumbled, watching her give him her best pleading look. “Since you can’t safe word with me in your mouth, pinch my thigh if you don’t want any more. I’m going to let you start, but I’ll take control shortly after.” There was a pause. “M’gonna be gentler because it’s your first time with me, but in the future I’ll push you to your limits. Remember what I told you.” He’d never be angry or upset if she wanted to stop. 
Y/N took the permission though, quickly pulling the head of his cock into her mouth and humming in relief. She’d been dreaming about this all week, just as he had. When he’d initially put her on her knees for him the first time they’d met up, she had hoped this would be the case/ but it was worth the wait with his fingers carding through her hair and taking a handful at the back of her head, loosely waiting as she sucked. 
She loved oral. Really, she did, but there was something about Harry that made her all the more excited to do this for him. Perhaps it was the praise or just his energy, but she could feel the dull throbbing of her clit as she took a bit more of him down. 
“Pretty mouth.” He mumbled, wiping the corner of her stretched lips was she got a bit messier. “Been thinking about it, having you here. Love that you’re eager for it. Are you this much of a  cockslut for everyone else?” She tried her best to deny it, a muffled ‘mm-‘mm’ leaving her throat as she tried to take more of him down. “No? Only for me?” This was easier to confirm, bobbing her head a little bit. Harry let out a hiss as he watched her take more, the first tear slipping from her eyes without permission. He was making her eyes water already. 
“M’glad to hear that. This is going to be your favorite cock, I bet.” He started to take over now, pushing her hand away. “Behind your back- good, perfect listening.” He praised, slowly pushing her further down on his length. “This is where you’re going to dream about being. On your knees for me, a bit helpless. But I think…. Fuck.” His eyes clenched shut for a moment as she gagged on him. He watched for any sign to stop, but she merely opened her wet eyes and looked up at him. “I think you like being a helpless little thing. You want me to use you.” He was getting down to it now, thoroughly impressed- but he felt her hand come up and tap his thigh, immediately pulling back. The girl let out a choked noise, Harry pausing and stroking her hair back, looking down in concern. “Okay, baby?” He whispered, watching her wipe her mouth with the back of her hand. “Need a break?”
“Y-yeah I’m okay. We can keep going but...” Her voice was hoarse. “I just- I couldn’t take anymore.” Her bottom lip quivered. “I’m sorry. I wanted to take all of it. I tried-“ she was immediately cut off with Harry cooing at her, lifting her head up and his face bent down to look at her. 
“None of that. It’s okay, darling.” He smiled. “M’just a bit too big for you to take yet. I know. It’s disappointing but…. You’ll learn.” He thumbed away a tear. “We can work on training that throat to take what it was made for. Okay?” Despite how dirty his words could be, he was still comforting her. “Nothing to be sorry about. You’re only just now learning how to be the little whore you’ve always wanted to be.” He got down further, pulling her face up for a messy kiss before straightening up. “How about this. You’ll let me fuck your mouth, but I won’t try and make you take it all. Really want to cum on this pretty face, been aching for it all day.” 
Y/N was burning from his words, the lack of air, her throat. All of it felt good, though. She loved how he spoke to her, the zip of the degrading ruining her panties. She’d been so disappointed in not being able to take all of him, but she liked the idea he proposed. Training her. It made her think about spending more time with him. Sure, it was supposed to be a short term thing but… she was going to take her time if this was the only shot she had of living out her fantasy. 
“Sound good to you, pet? You think you can handle it?”
“Yes, sir. Please fuck my mouth.” She whimpered, aching for him to get back into it. 
And he did. Fuck, he really did. 
Harry was gentle at first, scooping her hair up into a makeshift ponytail. She was kneeling on the bed platform, giving her more ease to suck at the level she was at and him the ability to move her as he pleased. At first he pulled her down onto his prick, easing her into it. Giving some semblance of choice- but when she proved she could take him, he began to truly fuck her mouth. 
He wasn’t brutal, no. It wasn’t exactly what she expected- it was better.  Firm with his strokes but only pushing her to the limit, making he drool around his cock as her hands were held behind her back. Her arms were starting to ache a bit from holding the position but she liked the burn. She liked that he held her head still while she laid her tongue flat and let him thrust into her mouth, pulling out to the tip and thrusting back in. Even more so, she loved how he talked to her. 
“There she is. This is what my greedy pet wanted, isn’t it?” He purred, eyes dark as he looked down at her. “Taking it so well. Messy little thing.” His gaze was hooded as he pushed her down as far as he knew she was comfortable, pushing a bit and making her throat flex around him as he let out a deep groan that went straight to her cunt. “Fuck, yes. Work that little throat for me. Fucking perfect.” He hissed.
It was hard to see with her eyes tearing up but what she did see was perfection. Seeing him lose that control as he watched her swallow his cock, her lips strained from being wrapped around it. Her jaw was going to ache something fierce but it was worth it. 
“Look so innocent, but you’re a deprived whore behind closed doors. Fucking love it, you know that?” He breathed. “Letting me show you how good it feels… how it’s good to let go and be the brainless slut you want to me. Just hand all that control over to me, open that pretty mouth and do what you were born to do. Pleasure me.” He was testing the dirty talk, giving her a glimpse of the degradation she had asked for but not go too hard into it. With each sentence he could see her clenching her thighs, he could feel how she sucked harder over him as he spoke. She liked it. 
Harry was in heaven. Of course he’d expected a bump in the road, multiple really, considering no dynamic was perfect right off the bat- but Y/N was taking to it really well. He’d been impressed with how much of him she could take, the fact she wanted her mouth fucked, and to be honest? She was good. Sloppy, her inexperience in this showing, but really fucking good. He’d happily train her mouth and throat to take him all the way, but this was just as good. His head was swimming in pleasure, her hair tight in his hand as he watched her saliva drip down her chin and onto her poor dress, how she took it without complaining. The girl was a goddamn dream, and he knew this had been the right decision. 
“Messy little baby. Making a fucking mess on my cock and your dress. It’s a good thing you’re not going to need to wear it for much longer.” He smiled, looking a bit drunk.Y/N loved being the one to make him look like that. “Really, you’re not gonna… not gonna need much clothing with me. Doubt you’ll want to wear any with how needy you are. Gonna bend over and offer yourself up to me.” He is breath hitched as he pushed deep, letting himself hold it there before pulling out and letting her cough. Y/N, the filthy thing,  smiled at him with her wet eyes and soaked chin. 
“Yes, Sir.” She breathed. “I want you to cum. Please…” she moaned as he rubbed the wet head of his cock over her cheek, painting it with her spit and his precum. She knew she had to look a mess, but Harry was giving her a look that made her feel like she was going to be devoured. “Please, I’ve been a good girl. I took you, I’ll keep getting better- I want your cum.” Her voice turned that tiny tinge whiny, just like he had predicted. 
“You really are a cockslut. Should I add cumslut to your list of names too?” He chuckled in disbelief. His hand stroked firmly over his prick, smearing it over her face as her lips pursed to kiss it as it passed over. “Fuck me. Where did that shy little thing go? She’s gone away and left me with a filthy excuse of a pet.” He lowered his voice. “Love that. I think I can give you my cum. M’so close.” He head tipped back slightly as he pushed back into her mouth, taking a few dips in the wet heat. The only thing that could beat this was cumming in her cunt. Watching it drip out- but this would be a very close second. 
“Beg me for it.” He ordered, pulling out and stroking right in front of her face. The dominant could feel it it in his balls as they tightened, watching her genuine need. “Be a good little pet, ask me for my load all over your pretty face.” 
There was no acting here. “Please, please give me your cum sir.” She whined, panting as she pleaded. “I want it so much, I was a good girl and I- I need it. I want to be messy with your cum, I want to taste it.” She stuck her tongue out for a moment, letting him smack the tip over it a few times before he pulled back again. Wasn’t good enough. 
“I’ve been thinking about it and touching myself imagining you all week- and, and I really really want you to cum on me. Make me dirty. I’ll do anything.” Her eyes watered again, “please? Please, sir.” 
Harry liked that a bit too much. Y/N was a vision on her knees for him, with her wet face and teary eyes, a glow on her skin that only reminded him of how lucky he truly was to be in this sort of position. He was the first one to give her the things she’d been craving for god knows how long and she truly looked desperate for it. The poor thing was tearing up, falling slightly into that space he had been curious to see just at the prospect of his cum. He couldn’t hold back on her anymore, not when she had been deprived of most of the other things she wanted. 
“Tongue out. Stick your fucking tongue out, and give me your eyes.” His words were chased through clenched teeth as he felt his stomach tightening, her pink tongue laid out and her breathing erratic as she nearly whimpered for him as he rubbed the head of his prick over her tongue. His eyes were glued to her, watching a single tear start to slip down her flushed cheeks- and that was it. He’d always been good at holding back his orgasm before but he couldn’t control this one, a heady groan echoing in the room as one hand held her head still whilst the other milked himself of his load. Watching it paint the pad of her tongue, some dripping down her chin as she tried her best to keep it all in her mouth.. She was such a good girl. It was in her nature, he could tell, and he had been the one to experience her first appearance. Her first bloom as she puffed against his cock, staying still while he fisted himself, making sure to drain every last drop from her balls on her waiting tongue. She deserved it. “There we are… there’s my pretty pet. Keep it on your tongue. Don’t swallow.” He could feel his legs slightly weaken as he regretfully pulled himself away. He needed a minute before he could do something else, but already he could feel his heat seeded in his tummy just by the view. 
It was hard not to be obsessed with the image. 
“Do you want to spit it out, darling?” His voice was softer now, hand that clenched her hair letting go to gently stroke her surely sore scalp. She whined in her throat though, shaking her head as her brows furrowed looking up at him. Christ. “You want to swallow it?” A nod. He’d underestimated just how dirty she was. “Alright, baby. Swallow it then, you were good. Can have what you want.” 
Y/N looked up at him obediently, keeping their eye contact as he watched her swollen lips close and her throat bob from her swallowing. Gingerly tipping her head further back, he thumbed the spillage from the corner of her mouth across her lips and pressed inside, dragging the cum over the pad of her tongue and smiling as she gave him an unsure look. “Suck for me. There you go… M’so proud of you.” He cooed, gently pulling her body up to sit on the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling, hm? Throat a little sore?” The dominant kneeled between her now split legs, thumbing over her bare knee as he checked in on her. 
To be honest, she looked incredible. And he wasn’t just saying that because a dribble of his cum had gotten on her tits. She looked happy. A shy smile on her flushed face and a glow to her skin, eyes hazy and soft, this was the ideal he had for anyone he played with. Happy. He’d gone easy on her to start, but he could only imagine how fucked out he could get her later on down the line. When he pushed her to the limits and she became even more proud of herself for pleasing him, drunk on orgasm and giggly in that space only someone like him could get her to. 
“M;okay.” She peeped, cautiously laying her hand on top of his. “Can I hold your hand? Is that okay?”
Harry felt his heart grow a little, smiling fondly as he flipped his hand over to intertwine their fingers. Their joined hands were brought to his mouth and a spattering of kisses was given to her knuckles, a show of appreciation for her and fondness over the cute little shit she did. “Fucking adorable. Y’know that, darling?” He chuckled under his breath. “Need to check in on you though. Make sure you know just how incredibly you did, that you were okay with everything that just happened, if you need anything to change. I went a bit easy on you for our first time.” 
Y/N’s head was swimming in a good way. Of course it had been far more intense than any blowie she had ever given but that was the point. Harry had been the one in control all while giving her a little leeway. Her face had been fucked, albeit not as much as she had hoped. Her body was still hot over the idea of him training her throat to take him. There were so many things that should be floating through her head right now but it was hard to think further than Harry. Harry, Harry, Harry. He’d been so good to her, given her that taste she had been gagging for and now she knew she wanted more. This feeling was addictive. Maybe her head was swimming from the slight lack of air, but maybe that meant she’d be even more into breathplay than she imagined. Either way, she was happy.
“M’so happy.” She admitted, the rasp of her voice making her toes curl. He had done that to her. “I liked it all. Liked how you pulled my hair, how you talked to me a-and that you just… you fucked my face. I’ve wanted it for ages.” Her face felt hot even admitting that but there was nothing but acceptance and pride on his face as he nodded, lips brushing against her hand. His stubble was scritchy and she liked that. “Was a little disappointed I couldn’t take it all though. You’re… you’re bigger than anyone i’ve been with.”
“Didn’t expect you to.” The man laughed. “I know it’s a lot for your throat, sweetheart. Hasn’t been properly fucked before. Stroking my ego a little with that, but I’m patient. I’ll make sure you can take it soon. Just takes a little practice.” his face leaned closer to hers. “Luckily, I’m full of that when it comes to teaching you. You’re a lot of fun.” His lips pressed against hers chastely, pulling back with a pleased look on his face. “I know you’re probably wanting a little bit of relief, throbbing for me to touch you, aren’t you?” He hummed, watching as she eagerly nodded, blinking at him in hope. However, he wasn’t going to make it that easy for her. “But I think…” The evil little smile on his face made her nervous. “This would be a good time to show you your own bit of patience.”
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querkynchaotic · 1 month ago
Text
Obliviate
mary macdonald microfic - canon compliant
(quoted choices by messermoon for dumbledore's first line)
The first time she thought about it was when Marlene died.
It had been months since she had used magic and years since she had stepped foot into Diagon Alley. Actually, after Hogwarts ended, the only time she had seen a wizard or a witch who wasn't one of her friends was in St Mungo's, when Lily had given birth to Harry.
The problem is, once you think about something, there is no unthinking it. The more she tried to get that idea out of her head, the more she thought about it. And as things got worse, that little voice in the back of her mind became more and more oppressive.
"What if you just forgot about it all ?"
Forget about the bullying in school, the glares, the insults, the double standards, the spells behind her back. The death eaters who had already killed so many of her friends. The attacks on Muggles she felt were directed against her. Knowing who had done it, knowing why, and having to hear the explanations the muggle news gave. Knowing the truth.
Knowing became too much. And she understood why they all wanted to fight -- James Potter wouldn't be James Potter if he wasn't risking his life to make the world a better place -- but she just. Didn't have anything to fight for. The wizarding world didn't mean as much to her as it did to them, and she didn't see why she would fight for a place where she was so unwelcome.
So she thought about it. Forgetting everything. But there was too much to forget. And Lily was still here, Sirius was still here, and they needed her. She couldn't be that selfish and let them down.
So, she only thought about it. As something to calm herself in the middle of the night, the kind of horrible thought that weirdly brings you comfort, thinking "if everything goes to shit, I'll just forget about it."
She just never imagined it would get that bad.
Because after Marlene died, Dorcas went a bit crazy. And then she died. And then Lily disappeared. When Harry was 6 months old, her and James went MIA. Sirius wouldn't tell her anything, they mostly talked about Remus, and the more they did, the more Mary wondered how they would ever come back from that. But she never wondered if they would come back from that. I mean, they were Sirius and Remus, for goodness' sake.
And then.
And then.
And then Lily died. And James. And Sirius had betrayed them. And he had killed Peter. And the world fell apart.
She's in Dumbledore's office with Petunia Dursley, ready to leave, when Dumbledore says :
“You will leave Harry Potter where he is. You will not speak to him, you will not write to him, you will have no contact with him at all.”
She feels like she's in a dream. She's outside of her own body, watching herself in that office, with that man. Right now, she doesn't see a war hero, or a rebel, or a headmaster : she sees the reason why so many of her friends are dead. No, not "so many" : all of them. Because the two who are left might as well be.
"He can't..." Her voice sounds weird, like she's hearing it on tape. Like it's someone else speaking. It's completely void of emotion, as well. It catches her off guard. But maybe she doesn't have anything left to feel. "He can't know I exist ?"
The old man smiles, all trace of coldness gone. "I'm glad we understand each other."
"Then I want you to obliviate me".
The voice in her head isn't a voice in her head anymore. It's not an intruder telling her "you could forget about it" ; it's her thinking "I'm going to forget everything". It's her saying it out loud.
"I beg your pardon ?"
"You heard me. You want me to leave Harry alone ? That's the thing I ask in return." Her voice is mechanic, daring, like her emotions are turned off. Usually, that's not a good thing, because it's even more of a mess when you turn them back on. Hopefully, this time, she won't have to go through that.
"I don't understand. What are you asking ?"
God, she had forgotten Petunia was here.
"Obliviate. It's a spell that erases your memory." She doesn't bother waiting for Petunia's reaction, turning her attention back to Dumbledore. "You said I'm reluctant to being involved, right ? Well, this is me not getting involved. With any of it, actually. I don't want to remember the war, I don't want to remember how it ended, or why it started, I don't... I don't even want to remember your stupid school. I want to forget that magic exists."
A surprised gasp comes out of Petunia's mouth, and then the mask is back on, and she looks full of disdain once again. "I understand that. I always told Lily it was better to be normal than a freak."
Mary wants to tell her she's wrong. She wants to tell her that magic can be beautiful. But right now she doesn't remember why. Magic is beautiful when it's someone's magic, and everyone magical Mary loved is dead.
For Lily's sake, for all the times Mary held her while she cried missing her sister, she wants to tell Petunia she's wrong. That she loves being a witch. But she's so tired. And right now, she really doesn't.
She wishes she had someone on her side, to argue with Petunia so she doesn't have to. To jump into the fight for her.
But isn't that what they did ? Jump into the fight for people like you ? And where did that get them ?
Absolutely fucking nowhere.
"How far back are we talking about ?" Dumbledore's voice snaps her back into reality. He's looking at her with piercing blue eyes. God how she hates him. But she's also relieved, like this man is finally gonna take away some of the pain he caused her.
"Everything. Just erase everything from when I was eleven years old."
"I would not recommend that. You would wake up with ten years of your life missing, and you would start asking questions. Trying to fill the gaps."
"Can't you..." She sighs. She's so fucking tired. And more than anything, she wants to go to sleep. Physically and metaphorically.
"Can't you leave some stuff then ? So I don't wonder and get nosy about my own life ?"
"One simple way to do that would be for you to extract your memories from your brain. That way we could choose which ones..."
"For you to have them ?" She cuts him sharply. "And keep them in little bottles and look through them whenever you like ?" She scoffs "That's not bloody likely. Aren't you supposed to be a good wizard ? Like, really talented ? Can't you manage to... I don't know, make your obliviate a little selective ?"
"I could leave some memories of school, the ones that don't imply magic, but it would be very blurry. You wouldn't have much. And I can't let you keep any memories that date from after school. That would leave too many blanks you would want to fill."
She sighs. Closes her eyes. Lets that sink in.
He's going to do it. He's actually going to do it. This is it. This is where her pain stops.
What a bastard though, she thinks with a chuckle. She opens her eyes.
"It's fine. Just... Imply that we fell out of touch after school. I have a lot of memories that don't include them. I'll be fine."
"Very well. Mrs Dursley, if you would like to step back."
And suddenly, she sees everything. Like she's going to die and her whole life flashes before her eyes. All her magical life, anyways. It's like her brain knows what to focus on, in a last desperate attempt to keep it.
She's going to forget Lily's wedding. She's going to forget Harry. She's going to forget Sirius' and Remus' flat. She's going to forget Marlene's 19th birthday party. She's going to forget the trip they all made to France.
She's going to forget about Quidditch. James flying on his broom, Marlene and Sirius throwing bludgers at each other, Lily cheering them on, Remus reading in the stands, Peter with a red and gold scarf and pink cheeks.
She's going to forget how it feels to fly.
She's going to forget about potions. Lily giggling when they made Amortentia. Marlene mortified when hers smelled like Dorcas, Sirius and Remus thinking theirs didn't work because they were brewing it together.
The classes. The spells. Peter's magical chessboard, the owls, running in the Forbidden Forest, enchanting objects so they would dance, getting back at the boys and pranking them, getting drunk with Firewhiskey in the Leaky Cauldron, ...
She's going to forget Hogsmeade.
Trying to do magical make up. Sirius' magical moon phase tattoo. The first time she saw a unicorn. James' elf Minnie. The magical fireworks on New Year's Eve.
She's going to forget how it feels to cast a Patronus.
All there, in a second, she sees Lily smiling and Marls dancing and Remus...
"Obliviate"
When she comes home from university, she finds pictures of her school friends on the floor. She doesn't remember taking them out of the boxes, but she's feeling a bit light headed and really, really tired, so that must be it.
She picks up a picture of her and the girls. God, she hasn't seen them in ages. She smiles. She wonders what they're up to now. Mentally tells herself off for not having made the effort to stay in touch. It wouldn't make much sense to seek them out now, four years later.
Isn't it crazy, how you can spend your entire time with people, live with them, and then... They all went to different universities and fell out of touch, or at least that's what she assumes because right now she can't remember discussing their future, or what Lily wanted to study.
Oh well. She's ready to bet one day she'll turn on the sports channel and see Marls on TV, though she can't remember which sport it was she was really into. Or she'll stumble across a book written by Remus at the library, though she thinks she would remember if he had gone on to study Literature just like she did ?
"I really need to sleep" she mumbles to herself.
She picks up the photos, puts them back in their box, and goes to bed.
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hjparisian · 1 year ago
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always yours-harry j potter x reader
p: harry j potter x fem! reader w: TW !!! toxic relationship, abuse, fluff ending, cussing, not proof read summary: harry and (y/n) come across each other a bit after the war and reconnect. a/n: another request from a lovely follower! so sorry this is so late. i haven't had motivation to write and couldn't figure out what to even write. if any of you guys are in an abusive relationship, please try to reach out to someone! i know it's better said than done but you all deserve the best.
The light breeze felt perfect to (Y/N). It was her day off of work from the Ministry today, so (Y/N) decided to use this day for herself to relax. Merlin knows that her work and her boyfriend has her feeling drained.
(Y/N) had just exited Flourish and Blotts, nose in one of the new books she bought. Her focus was disrupted when she bumped into a large figure, making her drop her book.
"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry, I should've been looking where I was going," (Y/N) said to the person as she went to pick up her book but someone else grabbed it first.
"Oh it's alright, no worries," a familiar voice said to her.
(Y/N) looked up to the person handing her her book back.
"Wait, H-Harry?"
"(Y/N)?"
The girl was in shock. In front of her was her old friend and former crush, Harry Potter. The last time they've seen each other was at the Battle of Hogwarts. Though she had returned to Hogwarts for her eighth year, Harry did not.
"What are you doing here?" (Y/N) asked the man.
"I was just grabbing some stuff for school."
"School?"
"Yeah," Harry said. "I'm teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts."
"That's amazing Harry!" (Y/N) said to him. "I mean you were the best at the class. Plus you were such an amazing teacher when you taught Dumbledore's Army so it doesn't surprise me."
"Thanks, (Y/N). And what are you doing?"
"Oh, I just came from Flourish and Blotts. It's my day off from the Ministry and I was looking for new books."
"Well," Harry says. "What else do you have planned for today?"
"Honestly, nothing else."
"Do you want to come over to my place?" Harry asked her. "I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to. I was just hoping we could catch up maybe?"
"I would love to," (Y/N) said without a second thought.
Harry and (Y/N) exited the Leaky Cauldron and apparated to Harry's place. It was an apartment not too far from London. Harry unlocked the door and let (Y/N) enter.
It was a rather simple but clean apartment. There were a couple photos on the walls from Harry's years at Hogwarts. One that caught (Y/N)'s eye was a picture of Dumbledore's Army during their fifth year. Harry was in the middle of the photo and (Y/N) somehow had a spot right next to Harry.
"Bring back memories, huh?" Harry said as he stood behind her.
"Yeah. I still remember the first meeting." (Y/N) said. "I wanted to punch Zacharias in the face."
Harry laughed at your comment. "Me too, but he did come around."
Harry guided (Y/N) to the couch in his living room.
"Did you want anything to drink?" Harry asked her. "I got water, butterbeer, firewhiskey."
"Some butterbeer please."
Harry left to the kitchen and returned with two bottles of butter beer, handing one to (Y/N).
"So, how are Hermione and Ron?"
"They're good. They got engaged recently."
"Really?" (Y/N) said in awe. "That's wonderful! I remember talking with Hermione about Ron back in sixth year. Finally got her to admit her feelings for him."
Harry nodded his head, grinning at the memories. "They were both too stubborn to realize it."
(Y/N) nodded before taking a sip of the butterbeer. "What about you Harry? You were with Ginny last I heard."
"I was but not anymore." (Y/N) had a shocked look on her face. "We broke up a while back."
"Really? And Ron hasn't killed you?" (Y/N) asked.
Harry chuckled a bit. "It was actually Ginny who ended it. It was mutual so no bad blood between us."
"That's good then."
A question had been burning on the back of Harry's mind. Thankfully, they were on the topic of it.
"What about you? Are you with anyone?"
(Y/N) set down the bottle she was holding before she answered. "I am actually."
Harry felt his heart drop a bit. "Who is it?"
(Y/N) started messing with the hem of her top, feeling a bit nervous. "Do you remember Cormac McLaggen? He tried out for keeper our sixth year."
For some reason, Harry felt his heart crumble a bit. That bloke Cormac is with (Y/N)? Those two couldn't be anymore different. How could that troll earn her love?
"Harry?"
(Y/N)'s voice snapped him out of his thoughts.
"Are you alright Harry? You were zoning out a bit," (Y/N) pointed out.
"Oh, yeah I'm fine. I remember him, bit of a jerk from what I remember in sixth year." Harry said. "Is Cormac good to you?"
(Y/N) avoided eye contact and kept messing with her shirt. "Oh yeah. I mean we have a few arguments here and there, but he means well. Do you mind bringing another bottle of butterbeer please?"
Harry nodded before getting up to the kitchen again. He didn't necessarily believe (Y/N), but he wasn't going to prod on their relationship.
The two had been enjoying reconnecting. Harry told (Y/N) stories from his first year teaching at Hogwarts, one including how a third year girl sent him a singing card on Valentine's Day. (Y/N) also told Harry about her job at the Ministry and how her coworker spilt coffee on Kingsley Shacklebolt's robes.
(Y/N) looked at the clock on the nearby wall to see that it was a quarter past twelve am. She couldn't believe that she's been talking to Harry for this long. She had to get home.
"Hey Harry, I have to get going," (Y/N) told the man sitting next to her.
Harry looked at the clock to also see how late it was. "Oh, sorry. I didn't realize the time."
"It's quite alright Harry, I had a wonderful time with you anyways."
"Will you be apparating home?" Harry asks her. "Don't want you to head home by yourself if you aren't."
"Yes, I am. You don't need to worry," she said to him. "Besides, I know a few spells thanks to a certain Gryffindor."
Harry smiled a bit, knowing she was referring to him.
"I'll see you later Harry," (Y/N) said while handing him a paper.
The girl disapperated, returning to her home.
Harry unfolded the paper, which revealed some numbers. It was (Y/N)'s phone number. Right under it, she left a small message.
Call me! :)
The next morning, (Y/N) woke up to hearing noises coming from the kitchen. She put on a sweater and walked out to find her boyfriend Cormac cooking.
"Good morning," he said to her.
"Morning," she said.
"Thought I'd make us breakfast before you go to work," said Cormac. "Also where were you last night? You got home pretty late."
"I was catching up with an old friend."
Cormac hummed before asking her the dreaded question. "Who?"
"Oh it's no one special," she nervously said.
Cormac raised an eyebrow at her before asking again. "Who were you with, (Y/N)?"
(Y/N) cleared her throat before speaking. "Harry."
"Potter?"
"Yeah him."
(Y/N) looked at her boyfriend, seeing a look of resentment in his eyes.
"I never really liked that bloke." Cormac said while handing (Y/N) her plate. "Gave the keeper spot to Weasley just because that's his best friend."
(Y/N) just nodded, not wanting to say anything to make Cormac upset.
The two ate until (Y/N) had to go to work. While heading to work, (Y/N) felt her phone buzz. She saw it was a number she didn't recognize, but the back of her mind was hoping it was a certain boy.
(Y/N) took chance and answered it. "Hello?"
"Hello?" A familiar voice said. "Is this (Y/N)?"
(Y/N) laughed a bit before responding. "Yes it is."
"Oh good. It's Harry."
"I know," (Y/N) said, smiling. "I recognized your voice."
"Ah yeah," Harry said. "How are you?"
"Good. Just heading to work."
"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize. I can call later."
(Y/N) felt herself smiling more.
"No it's alright! I have time. Besides, it makes the travel to work less lonely."
And so began a new routine of Harry calling her on her way to work. Which then went into them calling each other after work. On nights Cormac was away, Harry and (Y/N) would call each other.
Harry and (Y/N) began seeing each other more in person too. He'd join her on trips to Diagon Alley for more books or to grab a bite after a long day of work.
This change did not go by unnoticed by Cormac, though. He noticed how distracted she became, how she smiled at her phone more, how she left for work earlier and came back later, how she'd go out more.
The boy had enough.
One day, when (Y/N) had returned from work late, Cormac was sitting in her living room, waiting for her arrival.
"Oh! Didn't know you were here Cormac, I thought you wouldn't get home 'til later," the girl said upon noticing her boyfriend on her couch.
"Where were you?" The boy asked her.
Cormac had gotten up and walked towards her, glaring at her.
(Y/N) had begun to feel a bit nervous, knowing Cormac wouldn't like the reason she had returned late.
"I-I was at work," (Y/N) stammered out.
"What about after work?" Cormac questioned her. "Where did you go?"
"Just went to grab a bite."
Cormac began pestering her. "With who? You had to have been with someone if you've taken this long."
(Y/N) felt herself starting to shake. She had never enjoyed when Cormac began to act like this, knowing he was getting angry and a bit emotional.
"I was just out with a friend," she meekly said.
"I wanna know who you were with (Y/N)."
"It was just a friend, Cormac."
"Don't bullshit me. Was it with Potter?"
(Y/N)'s hesitation was all Cormac needed to get his answer.
"It was with Potter, wasn't it."
(Y/N) couldn't lie to him, knowing he figured her out. She nodded.
"Yes, but he's just a friend."
Cormac laughed at her. "Oh really, (Y/N)? Doesn't look like it to me. All those days you came home late, were on the phone for hours. Probably all with fucking Potter. Wouldn't be surprised if you went and shagged him."
--TW description of physical abuse--
"Cormac, I didn't shag him! We were just reconnecting, that's all. Please let's just tal-"
A loud smack echoed through the room.
Cormac had hit her.
"Shut up you bitch!"
Tears welled up in (Y/N)'s face. Cormac took noticed of this and began laughing at her.
"You're crying?" The boy shoved her against the wall. "What if I give you something to actually cry about?"
"Cormac, stop!" (Y/N) sobbed.
He let go of her and let her drop to the ground. (Y/N) had begun sobbing loudly, hyperventilating.
"Get out (Y/N)! Go to your fucking boyfriend Potter for all I care." Cormac screamed at her.
--TW end--
(Y/N) had pushed herself up and got out the door before Cormac slammed it behind her. She decided to use her strength to apparate to the only person that could help her.
She knocked on the door and waited a second before it opened to reveal her former schoolmate.
Harry stared at her before bringing her inside and embracing her. She flinched, but began melting into his embrace after telling herself that it's just Harry.
"I just need to know," Harry began. "Did Cormac do this to you?"
(Y/N) just nodded, not wanting to speak.
Harry felt himself become angry. How could Cormac do this to her? She was an angel, unlike that asshole. He never deserved her. But did Harry himself deserved (Y/N)? He couldn't protect her, keep her safe. This could've been avoided if Harry was with (Y/N).
He couldn't think about that now when (Y/N) was in his arms needing care. He brought the girl to his bathroom, doing his best to try and tend the bruises that littered her skin. Harry drew a bath and brought a change of clothes for (Y/N).
"I'll be right outside, I promise." He told her. "I'll have to finish checking your bruises when your done."
Once (Y/N) decided to get out of the bath half an hour later, Harry made sure he didn't miss any other injuries before bringing her to his bed. He was just going to let her rest until a hand grabs his.
"Don't leave. Please."
Harry would always listen to (Y/N).
The boy stayed with her until sleep finally took over. As much as Harry wanted to stay with her, he had business to take care of.
Thankfully, he remembered where (Y/N) lived after dropping her off multiple times so he apparated in the night to her door. He banged on the door hard until it opened, revealing his new worst enemy.
"What do you want Potter? (Y/N) isn't here."
"Oh I know." Harry told Cormac. "Just came for a chat."
Harry stepped forward in an attempt to enter the house until Cormac stopped him.
"I'm busy right now."
"Well I guess I can try to make this quick," Harry said.
A punch was thrown at the older wizard, catching him off guard. Harry grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pushed them into the apartment, shoving him up against the nearest wall.
"I know what you did to (Y/N), McLaggen. How dare you hurt her!" Harry screamed at him.
"I didn't do such thing." Another punch was thrown.
"Don't you dare lie to me! I know you did it. You hurt her! You never deserved her."
"Oh but you think you do?" Cormac scoffed at Harry, while trying to push him off.
"I would've treated her way better than you ever have."
"You want a slut like her? You're pathetic Potter."
Those words had enraged Harry more than ever. The two continued fighting, Harry having the upper hand. One more punch landed on Cormac before he fell to the floor.
"You better stay away from (Y/N). If I hear that you stepped one foot near her I won't hesitate to punch you again," Harry spat at him before making his leave back to his home.
Harry headed for his room, wanting to make sure that the girl he loves was still there. Fortunately, she was, but she was awake.
"Where did you go Harry? I was getting worried."
"I just went to take care of something," he said, trying to reassure her.
"What do you need to take care of at this time?" (Y/N) said while walking toward him.
A small gasp slipped her month before her hand made contact with his cheek. Harry would be lying if he said it didn't feel nice.
"You're hurt Harry!" (Y/N) exclaimed before dragging him to his bathroom.
"(Y/N) love, I'm fine." He kind of wasn't. Harry looked at his reflection in the mirror and saw the marks Cormac apparently left him. He was too focused on getting vengeance for (Y/N) that he ignored it.
(Y/N) began cleaning his face. "Harry, you have dried blood on your face. I don't think that's considered fine. What were you doing?"
"If I tell you, you have to promise you won't be upset," Harry said to her.
"What?" (Y/N) paused, confused.
"Just promise me."
"Fine. I promise I won't get upset."
"Alright, well," Harry began. The adrenaline was gone and he began feeling nervous. "I went to visit Cormac at your guys apartment."
"You went to see Cormac?" (Y/N) squeaked. "Why would you do that Harry?"
"I couldn't stand what he did to you (Y/N). He hurt you. You didn't deserve what he did. I had to teach him a lesson."
"So you went to beat each other up?"
"Well, him more so than me," Harry joked.
"Why? Why would you beat him up for me?"
"Because (Y/N). I love you."
(Y/N)'s eyes widen in shock. "W-what?"
"I love you. And I think I always have. Seeing you brought back those feelings I've had back when we were at Hogwarts. I would do anything to protect you (Y/N)."
"Oh Harry," tears welled up in (Y/N)'s eyes.
Harry noticed and got a little bit worried. "It's alright if you don't feel the same way. I know you just had to deal with Cormac so-"
Arms wrapped around him and lips met his. Harry froze for a second before melting into it, gently placing his hands on her waist.
(Y/N) was the first to break the kiss, to respond to Harry's declaration of love to her.
"I love you too, Harry."
(Y/N) finished cleaning up Harry before heading back to his bed. His arms wrapped around her, keeping her warm and safe.
"I promise to protect you no matter what," Harry said to her. "I would do anything for you."
"And I will do the same for you, because you're mine."
"And I will always be yours."
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wolf-tail · 6 months ago
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Even if Rowling wasn't completely off the holocaust denying deep-end, the way she wrote those wizard books kind of pisses me off now that i'm older because they have so much potential to be better than they actually were.
Like, middle school me was eating that shit up for a reason, you don't become one of the most popular authors in the world who created one of the most well-known pieces of literature in the world off of dumb luck. There were things she did right. Unfortunately , now that i'm older I can see everything she did wrong. And my writer's brain mixed with my ego is telling me that I could make it better.
Implant a heavier theme of the wizarding world's patronizing bullshit and entitlement. Like seriously, the complete unwarranted superiority complex that these chuckle fucks have is obnoxious beyond belief. Even middle school me knew that there was no good reason to keep magic away from the people they made up a slur for. Maybe that should have been the main theme of the books.
Seriously, it ties in so well with the evil wizard supremacy sublot. The solution to systemic discrimination is not to get rid of bigoted people. It's to tear down those systems entirely. The wizarding world seriously needs a status quo shake up.
Revamp the house elves or just cut them out entirely. Just don't fucking justify slavery. IT'S NOT THAT HARD!!!
Maybe this is lefist brain talking but do not make Harry grow up to be a fucking magic cop. In fact, I would have had made the Aurors be unbelievably awful and corrupt, just like a real cops!
Give the characters of color less racist names.
Stop describing your female villains as "mannish"
The greedy goblin banker theme is one of the most disgustingly antisemetic things i've ever had the displeasure of putting up with. What the fuck is wrong with you Joanne!? I would just cut that shit out.
The violent fatphobia grosses me out so much. When I was little I wanted Dudley to get a PROPER redemption arc so bad and not be abused for his weight. In fact , if I were Rowling, I would have added in a sublot about Dudley discovering his own magic to and having to unlearn the shit his parents taught him, as well as deal with their painful rejection of him. That would've been really cool.
Apparently lycanthropy was supposed to be a metaphor for HIV??? Ew, Joanne. No. It's like she never talked to a gay man in her life.
The "love" potions piss me off SO BAD. Voldemort's mother was not in love. She was a rapist. I would change that up entirely.
Snape is not a hero. He was an incel in a hate group. Acknowledge him as such and don't have Harry name his fucking kid after him.
Hey, quick question, why does the school have a blood supremacist house???? Why was this allowed??? Why did she write Slytherin to just be openly discriminatory towards mixed blood kids????
Whatever the dad Weasely's name is, I would have played off his whole "weeb for nonmagical people" thing as more patronizing and accidentally insensitive than endearing. He reminds me of white moms who say konichiwa to the waiter at Chinese restaurants and think they're "cultured".
For the love of god, treat the female characters other than Hermione with an OUNCE of respect.
Now that I know more about animal welfare and the exotic pet industry, Hagrid kinda gets on my nerves. I would add a sublot about him learning to respect the boundaries of wild animals.
I can't think of anything else that ticks me off about the books right now but I will come back to this if I do.
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buthowboutno · 3 months ago
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HELLO I'm new to asking things here but I've a small,,, tiiny question that idk if anyone's asked before or not but
What happened at metro tower between sweets and Leo? And, I suppose, with everyone else there, if anyone (like April) recognized Sweets
Because Donnie didn't, Raph and Mikey didn't say anything,,,
Leo and April are the only two that basically said "oh! You're the kid that almost died while we saved the world" so Idk I kind of was curious on, I guess
Like other than, obviously, Leo saving sweets but I guess how he found them? Because I know it's stated somewhere Sweets locked themselves in their moms office but idk
You don't gotta answer this at all (especially if it's a stupid question 💀💀) I just I got myself curious ig
this ask prompted me to write a whole ass snippet about what happened. i blame you. /aff
(snippet under the cut)
If it had been up to Splinter, Leo wouldn’t even be five feet away from his cot in the med bay, much less searching through the remains of Metro Tower. Mikey was still out of commission and Drax was doing some weird mystic ritual on Donnie to help with his head.
If it had been up to Leo, Raph would be in the med bay instead of digging through rubble by his side. April tagged along as well, but she was a floor below looking for… something.  
Leo might have been too ticked off about April and Raph bulldozing his plan to listen beyond every fifth word of their justification.
(Didn’t they know that this was Leo’s—?)
(After all that, they still trust—?)
They hadn’t found any survivors since the first day of searching, when Donnie passed out after manifesting a mystic slide for a group of harried interns that were stuck on the third floor. Mikey’s hands had cramped up so bad after guiding the lone barista out from their cupboard on the second floor that he was still having trouble holding a fork.
Leo wasn’t even sure why he insisted on coming back, to be honest. After four days trapped in this building, there was a good chance that any stragglers would have died of dehydration by now. Donnie’s scans, at least, didn’t show anyone in the building that they didn’t get out already.
Leo just… had this feeling. He couldn’t explain it.
Raph jumped up and tapped the big red ‘5’ hanging from the ceiling before the stairwell, startling Leo out of his thoughts. Under his massive hands, the sign crumbled off of the wall.
“Uh, whoops?” Raph said, looking sheepish as he turned towards Leo.
Leo snorted, “Property destruction. Nice.”
“That was… not my fault,” Raph said, his face screwed up as he stepped towards the stairs, “This whole buildin’ is— "
The floor creaked dangerously beneath Raph’s feet, prompting him to stumble backwards out of the stairwell. Leo took a few tentative steps forward, noting the slight shift in the floor but otherwise no other changes beneath his feet.
“Falling apart,” Leo finished, jumping up and down for good measure. No change, but Leo didn’t like the cracks slowly making their way up the walls.
“Maybe it's time to head back?” Raph suggested gently, taking another scared step backwards when the floor started creaking again, “Raph is getting a little geeked out.”
Leo nodded, taking a step towards Raph before he was struck with this urgent feeling in his chest. Like he had left something behind.
“I’m gonna take a quick look around,” Leo said, stepping back into the stairwell, “You’d better go back down and grab April.”
“Leo–”
“I’ll portal out if the building starts falling down, scouts honor,” Leo said before ducking up the stairs. Raph’s responding groan told Leo that Raph wasn’t going to march up there and grab him. Probably more due to the fact that the stairs would give out underneath him, but Leo would take what he could get.
(Leo was going to be majorly cussed out about this stunt when he got back.)
(Worth it.)
(At least, he hoped it was.)
The sixth floor of Metro Tower, surprise surprise, was functionally identical to floors two through five. The building was mostly leased out to a bunch of different companies doing Spirits knows what in their copy and paste cubicles. 
(They didn’t find any survivors above floor twelve. Leo tried not to think about it.)
Leo raided a few of the fancier looking offices, sending various pieces of tech back to Donnie’s lab through mini-portals. Bribery, maybe, but mostly practice. Leo’s portals had felt off since the–
…Yeah. He needed the practice.
Leo heard a muffled shout from down the hallway, immediately pulling out his second katana and running quietly towards the noise.
Leo noticed the kid first. They had dustpans duct taped to their chest and back like some budget LARPer. They held a yardstick out with a broken pair of scissors haphazardly attached to the end, trembling like Mikey after a fourth cup of coffee. A Kraang zombie shuffled towards them, its face half-melted at this point. 
Why was it still–?
Leo needed to tell the others about this. Donnie was positive that everyone who got infected would’ve been released after they closed the portal to Kraang Prime. This was– this wasn’t a good sign.
The kid shouted at the zombie like they were trying to scare off a bear and tossed a stapler at its head. Decent shot, but ultimately useless. The stapler landed on the zombie’s head and was slowly absorbed into the Kraang viscera protruding from its skull. 
The kid yelped, moment of bravery apparently lost, and ran in Leo’s direction.
Leo recognised that face. It was just a passing photo, something Casey swiped past while stammering about nerd shit like the ‘space-time continuum.’
(Donnie’s influence, no doubt. Leo may have been Casey’s sensei, but Donnie tended to infect people with his intelligence.)
This kid was younger than the photos, though. Their hair was cut short just above their ears, and the dark circles under their eyes told Leo that they hadn’t been getting much in the way of water or sleep since the invasion started.
That half second of thought cost Leo his chance to take down the zombie before it lunged at them.
The kid, thankfully, heard the zombie before it had the chance to grab them and whirled around with their makeshift spear. Their jab landed solidly in the zombie’s chest, but that still didn’t stop it. The zombie's neck craned out in a truly unnatural manner and bit the kid’s hand while it was still holding their spear. The kid let out a painful shriek that rattled inside of Leo’s skull.
That finally spurred Leo into action, sprinting on the front pads of his feet and slashing the zombie clean into three pieces. The body hit the ground without so much as a tentacle reaching out in protest.
The kid fell to the floor, eyes open with fear as they held out their left hand. The mutagen had already started spreading, past their second knuckle already, but it was moving slower than when–
Leo should’ve thought a little harder before he let his reflexes take over. In a second, he sliced off the kid’s pinky and ring finger before the mutagen had a chance to reach their palm. 
They screamed out in pain, immediately clutching their left hand to their chest and staring up at Leo with wide, terrified eyes. 
“Hey, it’s okay,” Leo tried, “I’m here to help.”
Their face was quickly turning white from the blood loss, but the look on their face made Leo think that they’d still try to stab him if he came any closer.
He’d probably deserve it, to be honest, but the kid needed a hospital above anything else. Leo reached down and grabbed the kid before they could fight back. He quickly sliced a portal through the wall and walked out onto the sidewalk in front of Metro Tower. With two more twirls of his katana, April and Raph were standing right next to him.
Leo tried not to think about the ache in his chest after opening up those portals. He pushed the pain out of the back of his mind as he focused on putting pressure on the kid's hand.
“What the–?”
“Med kit, now,” Leo demanded, not even looking at Raph. The kid was trying to wriggle out of Leo’s grasp, but the blood loss was obviously starting to get to them.
Raph wordlessly took the kit from his belt and handed it over. April was standing behind him in shock, hands twitching as if she was trying to figure out what to do.
“Fucking… wizard,” the kid stammered, now clutching onto Leo instead of fighting him, “My g-goddamn hand.”
“You’re welcome, pal,” Leo said flatly. He dumped the travel bottle of rubbing alcohol on their hand haphazardly before wrapping it up as tightly as he could.
“Eat my ass, Dr. Strange,” the kid muttered before looking up at Leo with a sudden and unusual clarity, “I think I’m going to pass out now.”
“Wh– no, wait!” Leo protested before the kid slumped fully into his arms.
That must’ve rattled April out of whatever funk she was in. She reached into the med kit and grabbed one of the instant cold packs, harshly squeezing and then shaking it to activate it.
“They’re going into shock,” she said, leaning down to apply the pack to the back of the kid’s neck, “Leo, can you portal–?”
The moment April touched the kid, Leo was sent into the mindscape. It wasn’t the same as a normal ninja mindmeld; typically, Leo was still able to see through the eyes of his physical body while it happened. This was like his entire consciousness was captured and taken somewhere else.
Leo turned his head to the left and saw April standing next to him, her eyes trained on something else. 
Donnie? No, not Donnie.
Not his Donnie.
This Donnie was… older. Scarred. Taller than Leo thought his twin could ever grow to be. He didn’t speak a single word, just held Leo’s gaze with an intense expression and nodded.
Leo understood, in a split-second, that the kid in his arms was precious. They were family. The pull, the call that compelled Leo back to Metro Tower was more than an antsy feeling driving him out of his cot. 
This… this was one last wish of a doomed timeline.
Leo also understood that if he let this kid bleed out on the streets of New York, the ghost of Donnie future wouldn’t let him sleep peacefully for the rest of his life.
“April? Leo?” Raph asked, his tone incredibly concerned as Leo snapped back to reality.
“Donnie called them ‘Sweets’,” Leo murmured under his breath.
“...What?”
Leo shook his head, clearing the images from his mind, “Right. Let’s go.”
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once-upon-an-imagine · 11 months ago
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Mmmmm
If u still want dialogue requests, maybe Sirius comforting the reader (platonically) due to her dad just generally sucking and being low-key sexist to her at some fancy "the noble and most ancient house of black" party/ball/whatever fancy rich ppl host? (She's also from one of those families, they're betrothed)
Also, hope ur day's better!!
I think this might have been a bit more angsty that you wanted to but I still hope you like it 😁 Warnings: arranged marriage; Lestrange!reader; reader is drunk; bad family situation (mentions and hints of abuse) Disclaimer:  I don’t own Harry Potter 😊 gif isn't mine 😊
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Till Death Do Us Part
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"Hey! It's the rest of the Marauders!" you announced happily as Sirius opened the door to his dorm. "How come they weren't at our engagement party?" you asked, looking at him.
"Because, love, your parents only got us, your brothers, and my brother out for tonight, remember?"
"Oh, right" you giggled. "Don't worry guys, you didn't miss anything good. It was soooo boring" you laughed.
"We can see that, love" James smirked. "Is she drunk?"
"Hammered" Sirius explained as he walked you over to his bed. "I didn't want her to go back to Slytherin like this" he commented.
"Smart" Remus nodded. "What happened?"
"The usual" Sirius shrugged as you sat down on his bed. "Her father being a prick. My dad being a prick. Our mothers being-"
"Bitches" you snorted, before he could finish, making all four boys turn to look at you. "Sorry, that is no way to talk about my mother-in-law" you laughed.
"What about your mother?" Peter asked confused.
"Oh, she is a bitch" you assured him.
"Hey, could you guys... go get something form the kitchen to sober her up?" Sirius asked them, James quickly getting the hint that he wanted all three of them out of there, got up and nodded.
"Sure thing, mate" he said, looking at the other two and grabbing the Map. "Anything you fancy, love?"
"Oh, if they have anything with potatoes or cheese on it, you would make me the happiest woman on Earth, Potter" you smiled sweetly at him.
"I'll see what I can do" he winked at you before the three of them left.
"Do you have anything that I can use to take off my makeup?" you asked Sirius as he looked through his trunk for clothes to give you.
"Um, yeah" he said, leading you to the bathroom. He gave you whatever you needed, placed his clothes so you could change, and gave you a toothbrush you used whenever you stayed there, since this hadn't been the first time.
"Thanks, Siri" you smiled wearily at him before he started to leave. "W-wait, um-" you said, feeling your cheeks burn. "C-could you please help me with m-my dress?"
"Yeah" he smiled before he started working on the back of your dress.
When it was finally undone, Sirius saw you take in a deep breath and felt his heart aching a little at how uncomfortable it looked. But that wasn't all he noticed. He saw faint bruises on your back and your arms. He felt sick to his stomach knowing he recognized them very well, since he had very similar ones on his body.
"They don't hurt as much anymore" you said quietly as Sirius looked at you through the mirror. He placed a soft kiss on your head and turned around.
"I'll be right out if you need me, love, okay?" he said and you thanked him.
A few minutes later, you came out of the bathroom to find Sirius already in his pajamas, sitting on his bed. He offered you a smile and a glass of water which you gladly took, sitting next to him. The two of you were silent for a moment until you spoke again.
"I'm sorry you have to marry me" you said, quietly as you gripped your glass.
"What?" he asked a little confused. "Why would you say that?"
"I don't know" you shrugged. "You can do a lot better, as my brothers were pointing out tonight to your brother and everyone else" you chuckled sadly.
"Your brothers are idiots" he waved it off.
"Still" you said, quietly. "You can call it off if you want to. You know that, right?"
"So can you" he frowned, confused but you shook your head.
"It doesn't work that way with the women in our world, Sirius" you smiled wearily at him. "Plus, even if I could, I wouldn't" you informed him, surprising him a little. "I know that... you didn't even want to get married and... if you did, I wouldn't be your first choice, and I know we don't really love each other that way but... I was relieved when I found out it was you" you said with a small smile.
"You were?" he asked, confused and you nodded.
"I think you and Regulus are the only ones that aren't... like our parents" you said, quietly. "So, if my fate was to be with someone in any of those families" you said, resting your head on his shoulder. "I'm glad it's you" you smiled, not noticing Sirius smile as well.
"Well, I'm glad it's me too then" he said, kissing your forehead.
"You don't have to lie, Sirius" you chuckled sadly. "I know I'm not the prettiest, or the brightest, or... fit to be a wife, really, as my father likes to repeatedly point out" you said, breaking Sirius' heart at how little you thought of yourself. True, the two of you didn't have a romantic relationship, but you had been friends your entire lives and you had been the only one who didn't stop talking to him when he got sorted into Gryffindor. And he loved you very much. "I promise I'll try my best to be the wife you deserve, Siri" you said quietly, making Sirius pull away from you a little.
"Hey, look at me" he said, gently placing his hand on your cheek and making you face you. His heart broke when he saw a few tears in your eyes. "You don't have anything to prove, okay? Not to me. Ever" he assured you. "You are one of the best people I've met, and I'm not gonna let your stupid father or your idiot brothers convince you that you're not good enough. I know that this situation isn't ideal for either of us but, love, I would choose to marry you a million times before I'd let your father pick any of those pricks that could hurt you" he said in a stern tone. "We're gonna be okay, love" he said, hugging you to him. "And I promise I won't let anyone hurt you again" he said, kissing your temple before he turned you to face him again. "No more silly apologies, okay?" he smiled sweetly, wiping away the last few tears on your cheeks. "We're a team now. We're in this together... till death do us part" he said, making you laugh.
"You're an idiot" you chuckled.
"I'm your idiot" he smirked. "Foreveeer" he said in a creepy voice making you laugh and hit him with his pillow.
"Alright, lovebirds, we've got the food" James said, entering the dorm with Remus and Peter behind them carrying an endless amount of food with them.
"You guys know I'm not that drunk, right?" you laughed as the placed everything in the middle like a picnic.
"Well, that is very pretentious of you, Miss Lestrange" James chuckled. "We're also hungry" he informed you. "Plus, I got cheesy potatoes" he said, getting out a container and your eyes widen.
"I love you, Potter" you said, getting away from Sirius and grabbing the plate from him.
"Seriously? In front of your husband?" Sirius asked, offended, sitting next to you. Sirius was right. This situation was not ideal, but you'd choose him every day over anybody else. You were going to be okay.
The End
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A/N: hope you loves liked it!
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eleadore · 3 months ago
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I was just rereading before a fall (again) and I always wonder if I liked the same things the author liked... Can you do top 5 lines from it, or scenes? :)
it's wild to have written something that's been reread haha, thank you for saying that. i'm fairly confident no one cares about these other than me but i was most chuffed by -
when harry dreams of lucius
"What are you doing here?" Harry calls out, but he's not frightened. Just curious. Malfoy turns to look at him and smiles broadly. "Where else would I be?" It's not his voice. It's not his smile. That smile widens until it looks uncomfortable, warping the rest of his face. Lucius Malfoy says, "Harry Potter. It is you, isn't it?"
i forced myself to cut out maybe four more lucius dreams hahhahafljksdkjf kill your darlings as they say
when harry runs into draco and luna outside the great hall
"I shouldn't get my hopes up," she's saying, pink-cheeked, hair even wilder now that it's dried. "But it would be wonderful, wouldn't it, if we could lure a few Tri-Horned Toe Biters? I'll set up a terrarium for them, just in case. And if it gets warm enough, I might be able to observe them mating…" "Aren't they supposed to be invisible?" Malfoy's brushing down his robes like Luna's charm might have left some unpleasant residue. For all that he's mocking her, he doesn't sound nearly as hostile as Harry would expect. "Yes, that's right," Luna says happily, and then, as she sees him: "Oh, hullo, Harry." Malfoy doesn't look at him as he slides past. Harry might as well be a Tri-Horned Toe Biter.
i laugh every time i think about this and theres no good reason for it
when harry's being annoying with his not-a-questions and decides to throw back some literal poison for attention. thats my son
Harry watches as he fills three vials with the antidote, neat, not a drop wasted. Slughorn's poison sits unstoppered between them, an innocuous baby blue. It could be anything. Do anything. "Going to test that out, then?" Harry asks. Malfoy gives him a look, there and gone again, and Harry doesn't think, just wants his eyes on him. The poison's at his mouth before Malfoy can react, Harry tipping it back and swallowing it all in one go. It tastes like mint. Harry licks his lips and is satisfied by the incredulity on Malfoy's face. "Come on. Let's see how you did, Malfoy." 
the scene where ron describes the scene where he's assaulted by random teenage girls gushing about how hot draco is lmaooooo self-indulgence... i know her well
"---and the other one says—these are Ravenclaws, mind you, aren't they supposed to be the brains? Well, this other one, she says, he's always been fit, you haven't been paying attention, and then the other one—the first one—she says, well, he's been sort of awful, hasn't he, what with his father and all the You-Know-Who business— "  "Nasty business, that," Harry says mildly. Dean is still laughing. "---and then," Ron says, stopping in front of Harry's bed and fixing him with a scowl, "the other one, she says, he can't be all that bad, can he, if Harry Bloody Potter gets on with him!" 
when they're in the greenhouse and draco is being a bitch, sirens sound
One more tug, and the glove is off. Their palms catch against each other, skin hot, a little slick from sweat. Draco's fingers are long, knuckles pronounced. Harry digs his thumb into the centre of his palm once, then again, and Draco's mouth falls open. Someone far away drops a pot with a muted thunk, and then wails in dismay. Harry barely hears it.  "If I only have until the end of the year to do what I want," he says, watching Draco watch his mouth, "then I should get started, I think."
ask me top 5/10 anything
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antebunny · 11 months ago
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So there's a subgenre of fics in the Harry Potter fandom wherein a person conceived while one of their parents is under the influence of a love potion will become aroace at birth. The origin, afaik, are two insidiously awful decisions of JKR combining: 1) she reinvented date rape drugs/roofies aka love potions, without realizing it I guess, and 2) she said that Voldemort was asexual, because she's never seen a marginalized identity she didn't spit on.
Since Merope Gaunt (Voldemort's mother) used a love potion on Tom Riddle Sr. (Voldemort's dad) I guess people got the idea that what if love potions caused asexuality? And asexuality + aromanticism, of course, meant evil. Here's an excerpt from one of those fics in which Bill Weasley explains being aro/ace to Hermione:
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"No. I just dated because that was what you did. I never really felt anything for them. A few kisses, plenty of hand-holding. I made out in a few broom closets, and had one very uncomfortable make-out session up the top of the Astronomy Tower that I eventually ended by pretending I heard Filch coming past on a patrol. I even tried making out with a guy once in case that was it–nothing. I never told mum about that, of course. Good wizards don't shame their families like that."
"There's nothing wrong with being gay, you know."
He shrugged. "It doesn't apply to me anyway. I'm not gay. I wasn't anything, and I was trying to accept that and be content with it. It was good enough. Until I met Fleur." His eyes lit up with joy as he spoke about her.
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"Look, the point is with her allure from being part-Veela, I love her. Like I can never love anyone else. I don't want to lose that. You don't understand what it's like to go through life feeling nothing for anyone else. I've dated people I said I cared for, but I wouldn't have died for them. Well, out of logical choice I might risk my life, but not from love. But I would die for Fleur. Do you understand? She makes me a better person. I would do anything to make her happy. I'm not alone in the world anymore."
She nodded slowly. "I see." It wasn't so much him manipulating Fleur, as him permitting her to manipulate him. Into feeling. "I didn't realise it could be that bad." She still thought he should confess, but it didn't sound like he was hurting Fleur–he really did love her.
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I read this fic years ago, and at the time I genuinely had not thought about my sexuality at all. I would've never called myself aro or ace. Still, reading this felt like being repeatedly punched in the face. I kept on waiting for Hermione to say something similar to what she said after Bill made a homophobic comment. After all, she went out of her way the first time, didn't she. Instead, what I got was essentially:
Bill: I don't usually feel romantic or sexual attraction. So there's something wrong with me.
Hermione: Yeah lmao. But there's nothing wrong with being gay!
I've been (reading) on Ao3 since 2016, and in all that time I've seen plenty of subtle racism, sexism, etc. But I've never seen anything as plainly stated as this. To this day I have yet to hear any aro/ace people describe the experience of being aro/ace in any of the following ways: "How could I forgive myself if we brought a child into the world to suffer the emptiness I lived with my whole existence[?]" /"You should be unable to love." / "You don't understand what it's like to go through life feeling nothing for anyone else."
I could not understand why Bill described it as "emptiness" or "feeling nothing." I still cannot find a single aro/ace person who would describe themselves as empty. The most I have ever heard is: "I wish I was normal" (meaning I wish I fit in, I wish to be accepted by other people). Historically, many aro/ace people married and had kids, conforming to societal norms, and I am sure many believed there was something wrong with them or hoped to grow out of it. I was one of them. On a very personal note, I suspect that my father is too. I am certain that he's never heard the terms asexual or aromantic in his life. But if you think I'll ever discuss his sexuality with him, you're out of your damn mind.
Now, I know it's really easy to find this fic from these quotes. I chose to include them anyways because I think it's important to show how blatant it was. My Tumblr blog isn't exactly a platform, but for the five people reading this: please, please do not go after the author. I truly believe that they had no ill-intent. In the comments of this fic, a few people bring up variations of "it sounds like Bill is just aro/ace" and the author is consistently understanding. Here are some of the author's comment on that fic:
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I very much understand what you're saying. It's a tricky thing for me to address, however. For the core idea I'm playing with is basically the evilness of "love potions". And part of that is exploring JKR's idea that Voldemort, being unable to love due to his mother using a love potion on his father, was a *monster* because of that. Perhaps that doesn't come across very clearly (there's a little bit more of it in the prequel), that it's one of the assumptions I'm trying to undermine. ("Love potions are funny/romantic", "Voldemort is a monster because he could not love", "Harry's power was that he could love - he's not a monster like Voldemort", "There's nothing wrong with selling love potions to teens/adults because it's not 'real' love".)
I feel like I'm already poking at the inherent problem of framing "people who cannot love" as "monsters/psychopaths" by showing Bill and Harry's struggles with self acceptance, and Bill finding a way to love (though do note he'd been making peace with the idea he wasn't attracted to anyone, prior to meeting Fleur). I really don't like the canonical take on love-redeems/love-is-the-best-power/the-loveless-are-monsters, so I'm messing with it a bit. Exploring other people than Voldemort, ones we admire, who are also dealing with being unable to love. Does that make sense? Now, that doesn't mean I'm doing a perfect job at it, but I'm trying my best to explore that theme around the edges of my Dramione story.
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The author's intention was to show how other characters, made aro/ace via love potion like Voldemort, were not evil or sociopaths. I don't know why all the characters were so aro/acephobic, but sometimes fics get away from you and you don't address everything you wanted to. I don't know why the aro/ace characters had so much internalized shame and hatred when the term bachelor has been in use for centuries, but we fanfic authors love writing self-esteem issues and I would be a hypocrite to say otherwise. I don't know why the author never tagged acephobia or internalized acephobia, but no one HAS to tag anything.
I don't know if the author ended up writing that fic where Harry comes to accept his aro/asexuality. It's totally understable if they didn't; I have failed to write many fics that I really did want to write. Sometimes it's just like that. I really, truly believe that the author had the best of intentions and is not aro/acephobic, just severely misled on what that experience is like.
My beef is not with this author. I used their words to highlight a reoccurring and popular sentiment that I hate. My real beef is that this fic is popular. This is an entire subgenre of Harry Potter fics. I actually decided to write this post because some random person on the internet said, a few days ago, something along the lines of: "Remember when JKR invented a date rape drug that turned people into sociopaths? Yeah…" (And also because I was up until 3 am last night writing a dumb trash angst one-shot about it).
I'd wager that the vast, vast majority of people who write or read those fics don't feel the same way. But the condescension is baked into the very premise of that trope. "Oh poor you, it must be so hard, so lonely going through life without ever loving another person. You must feel so empty inside."
It's actually people who say similar things that make me feel isolated. Most of the time I feel free, like I've cracked this secret code, like I'm able to see things clearly that people so hung up over sex and romance can't. Other times I feel so left out I wish I was "normal." Mostly, being aro/ace is lonely, annoying, exhausting, and liberating.
It wasn't until last year that a friend told me that some people actually do have trouble speaking to someone they've never met before, just because they find that someone attractive. I thought that only happened in stories. But I don't want to get nervous meeting new people based on their looks, I don't want to treat people differently based on how much I want to have sex with them. I wish my friends in high school had never pressured me to come out as bisexual. I wish all the other similarly liberal, queer communities I've found since didn't insist on associating sex and dating with emotional comfort. I wish I could magically stop my parents from expecting me to ever get married and have kids.
But I can't.
Anyways, that's it for today. I'm not sure what the point of writing this was. I really don't want anyone to get hurt or attacked because of it. This is not a callout, or a hate brigade, or any sort of call-to-action. I don't want people to get up-in-arms about this. I'm just tired. I suppose I just wanted to put my feelings out there, and well, this is my Tumblr.
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pascaloverx · 6 months ago
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To Begin Again
TWELVE
Summary: You're a new teacher at a large and influential school. It's a risky step for you, as you've been running from your ex for almost two years. But when Dumbledore asks you to take on a class at the renowned Hogwarts, you can't refuse. However, your life as a newly arrived teacher won't be easy. Especially when the other teachers don't seem eager to make friends. Or rather, two teachers in particular: Sirius Black and Remus Lupin.
Author's Note: Welcome, dear readers. Please leave your comments if you enjoy fanfiction. This fanfic takes place almost in the real world (with the addition of werewolves) and is not a wizarding fanfic. There will be some differences and changes in things from the Harry Potter story or other fanfics in the HP universe, but I promise to do my best writing this fanfic. There will be a love triangle coming in this fanfic. So, dear readers, just as in this fanfic it's meant to imagine Remus Lupin as being Andrew Garfield and Sirius Black as being Ben Barnes, now I present to you the fancast of Severus Snape as being actor Enzo Vogrincic. Imagine him as Snape if you can.
ELEVEN THIRTEEN
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A week later, things haven't improved. You managed to convince McGonagall that it would be best to change rooms, at least. The current issue is your emotional connection with Lupin. He feels too much, always intensely. For a man who barely expresses his feelings, he feels too much. And even by avoiding him physically, his feelings seem to have an absurd strength in reaching you.
"Are you sure this box isn't too heavy?" You ask Bellatrix, who as your new bathroom mate, is helping you with the move. McGonagall decided to switch you and Peter Pettigrew's rooms. So Sirius will have Peter as his next-door neighbor, and you'll have Bellatrix. It's better than having to avoid Mr. Black every day.
"I'm stronger than I look, sweetheart. I believe this is the last box. I said it would be quicker if I carried the boxes and you organized the room, right?" Bellatrix responds proudly, pleased to have been right. Thanks to her, you'll soon be able to go teach without worrying about organizing anything when you return to your room.
"Pay me back by coming over for a glass of wine tonight. They say it's good to have company for a nice wine on cold nights. What do you think?" Bellatrix says with a mischievous smile, and you can only think that drinking might help you forget your troubles.
"I think it's a perfect idea. I'll stop by your room later for wine," you say, kissing Bellatrix on the cheek. Strangely, she purrs when your face gets close to hers. She immediately kisses the corner of your mouth and leaves with a victorious smile. Unfortunately, you don't even have time to process what's happening in your life because you have to teach your students. So you rush towards the classroom.
The classroom has a distinct atmosphere. Ron and Hermione are sitting apart from Harry. Draco is relatively close to Harry. Pansy is sitting next to Luna. It seems different but not so bad. You had an idea of how your class would be. However, seeing your students like this, you thought of a more unique artistic dynamic.
"Today, we will work on ourselves. Before anything else, know that art resides within the artist. So everything you produce in this class will be a piece of yourselves. The main task is to create a painting that captures your essence. But before you worry about that, understand that the painting itself will be a project that will take several classes to complete. Today, we will focus on yourselves. I want everyone to think about something you like and something you dislike about yourself. One thing you admire about yourselves and another you despise. Does anyone want to start?" You ask the class of students in front of you, hoping someone will raise their hand and spare you from the awkwardness.
"I like being dedicated. Knowing more than most because I'm capable of it. What I don't like is how that can come across as arrogant or overly ambitious. I hate overthinking things." Not surprising anyone and saving you, Hermione Granger responds first. You look at her with pride, nodding as if to reassure your student that her account is important.
"I like how easily I can become attached to someone. Just give me a bit of affection and I can latch onto you. But unfortunately, I tend to develop expectations, and when those expectations are shattered, I become a mess," Ron Weasley opens his heart while holding Hermione's hand, as if she's supporting him, and looking towards Harry.
"I like being fearless. I enjoy adventuring, especially with my friends. And I don't like being aggressive, having a short fuse," Harry says, looking at both Draco and Ron, as if justifying his attempt to be less aggressive towards Malfoy. And so almost all the students went on pointing out what they liked and didn't like about themselves, until only Draco Malfoy was left.
"I like being better than most people I know. But I don't like the fact that it bothers me that feeling superior doesn't actually make me better," Draco admits reluctantly. You're pleased that he managed to share this. You speak to your students, observing them carefully as the school bell signals the end of your class. Everyone seems at least to be trying to take you seriously. As your students file out of the classroom for break, you begin packing up your things when you hear a knock on the door. Turning to look, you find Snape and Sirius standing side by side. Snape looks like a lost puppy who just found its owner, while Sirius appears genuinely furious.
"He wanted to speak with you, the one who helped him the day he lost his memory. Conveniently, now he has no idea what happened," Sirius replies sharply and straightforwardly, clearly in a bad mood. You understand that Snape is a risk for him, but the truth is, the Snape before you seems clueless about what transpired.
"I actually wanted to thank you. I have no idea how I ended up here or why I was in that forest, but I have a feeling you were the angel who saved my life. Right now, I'm going back to the United States to reclaim some of my life, and I wanted to say goodbye with my gratitude. Thank you so much, beautiful lady. If I ever come back here, you'll be the first person I visit." Snape speaks so passionately that it seems he has developed an extra fondness for you. Perhaps his heart holds more memories than his head. He catches you off guard by gently holding your face and kissing your cheek. Then he pauses in front of you for a few moments, gazing at you kindly. Before he can try to kiss you, Sirius pulls him back.
"I'm sure your brain hasn't forgotten basic manners. You don't just kiss someone like that, especially if you don't know if they're single. Can you imagine if you made the mistake of kissing her without her consent in front of her boyfriend? I think it's better if you show your gratitude by leaving." Sirius speaks impatiently and defensively, as if he were your boyfriend or something. Snape apologizes again, looking frightened, and quickly runs off. Clearly, he has lost his memory. Sirius would never scare him off like that if he were the Snape with memories intact.
"Expecting me to thank you for this is a waste of our time. Nice performance—it almost seemed like you were jealous, by the way," you say as you walk, followed by Sirius, who from your peripheral vision doesn't seem pleased at all.
"Were you going to let that repugnant man put his hands on you?" Sirius questions angrily, as if you were about to allow something horrible to happen.
"We both know what he did, but he doesn't. I wasn't going to let him touch or kiss me inappropriately. But that's hardly any of your damn business, Sirius. Go take care of your love life and personal affairs and leave mine alone." You turn, looking directly into Black's eyes, who huffs at your words. He's furious, but you don't care. You warned him that you wanted to stay away from him and Lupin.
"My love, it's hard to believe what comes out of your mouth when your eyes say you want me. I'm flattered that you want to play cat and mouse with me and Lupin. He might obey you, but I won't. Do you know why? Because I know there's a flame inside you that burns for me. And as long as I can, I won't let that damn flame go out." Sirius says, coming so close to you that you feel he could easily become a part of you. He seems angry but determined. You look at him for a moment, then place your hand on his chest for no apparent reason and lean in.
"You're going to end up hurting yourself by doing this. Because I can guarantee that even if I become a blazing inferno of pure desire for you, I will never let you get close to me in the way you imagine. Do us both a favor and give up." You speak so fiercely that, in the back of your mind, there is even a desire to bite Sirius's face. You particularly think this is the werewolf part of you speaking. You turn like a storm and head to your room, leaving behind an aroused and disappointed Sirius.
When you get to your room, all you can think about is how much you'd like to lie down on the bed and sleep. But soon you'll have to go drink wine with Bellatrix. So, you spend some time finishing tidying up your room and taking a good bath. When you get out of the bath and put on your robe, you hear someone knocking on the door. You find it strange because you're almost certain Bellatrix is supposed to be giving a lesson right now. But after tying your robe, you open the door. Remus Lupin stands in front of you, wearing only jeans and a shirt. You think he looks sexy, and unfortunately, from the little smile he gives, he knows you think that.
"What are you doing here?" you ask, leaning against the door and watching Lupin continue to stare at you as if you were a statue to be admired.
"I need you to let me in." That's all he says, while his feelings are too jumbled for you to understand. Something must be wrong. You move your head pointing into the room and let him enter.
"Your feelings are a complete mess. It feels like you can't focus on anything." You say looking at him after closing the door. He looks at you like he's in conflict with himself. That's when you realize you need to make him focus on something. Going against your own words, you do an impulsive act after waiting for him to organize his feelings. You approach Remus and kiss him. It should be a peck on his lips and you should walk away. But something pulls you closer, making you give Lupin another kiss. He leans you against the door, holding your waist, while he supports you against the door. There is a lot of excitement being felt. You know that every second the kiss intensifies, you want more and so does he. And then you throw Remus onto your bed.
"I'm being sabotaged. I had this theory since I transformed on a night that wasn't a full moon. But now it's concrete. The night you arrived here, someone let me out of the safe place where I should have been locked up near the cabin. Sirius and I thought it might be in our heads. A few nights later, I transform outside of the full moon. And now, I discovered that the lock on my little private prison was broken from the outside." Lupin speaks eloquently, and you're glad the kiss served some purpose. It seems crazy to think he might be sabotaged by someone, but it makes sense.
"Do you have any idea who it could be?" you ask, approaching Lupin, who looks distraught. You crouch in front of him, running your hand through his hair. Then the memory of the last time you saw someone crouched in front of him, looking at him the same way and with the same care as now, hits you. Instinctively, you fall back onto the floor, feeling embarrassed.
"You saw me and Sirius the other night. That's why you feel like we don't belong to you, isn't it? That's why you're running from us as if we were a disease? You're afraid of being left out," Remus questions with such confidence that it feels like he can understand you completely. You look at him, confused, while still on the floor, wearing only your robe. Lupin extends his hand to you to help you up. You take his hand and stand up. The two of you stare at each other while he waits for a response.
"If you want verbal confirmation, yes. I saw you two, I witnessed your love and how devoted you are to each other. You can't expect me to get in the middle of an already built relationship." You still speak very close to Lupin. He smirks, as if he finds what you just said adorable.
"If he and I are accepting you in the relationship, you're not getting in the middle of the relationship. Can't you see that we both want you?" Remus says and you put your finger on his mouth to make him shut up.
"You came here to talk about someone sabotaging you. Focus on what's important." You talk changing the subject. While you doesn't want to do romantic things right now, you are intrigued.
"My main suspicion is Bellatrix." Remus Lupin speaks, catching you off guard. You never thought Bellatrix could do anything to Lupin. However, you don't know their story well, and personally, you're a newcomer here. At that moment, someone knocks on your door a few times, distracting you.
"Who is it?" You speak loud enough for the person to hear, while also placing your hand over Lupin's mouth to prevent any misunderstanding.
"Hey, it's me, Bellatrix, your next-door neighbor. Just letting you know I've finished my last class of the day. I'm heading back to my room to take a shower, and then I'll be ready for your company. Sound good?" Bellatrix speaks loudly, and as you deal with Lupin's disapproving look, you begin to consider how to respond.
"Agreed. I'll be in your room as soon as I get ready here," you reply. After hearing Bellatrix enter her room, you remove your hand from Lupin's mouth.
"Are you really going to meet her?" Lupin asks, judging you while also appearing concerned. You look at him slightly uncomfortable.
"I know you believe she might be messing with you now. But to find out for sure, you'll need someone close to her to gather information. Unless you want Sirius to seduce her, I think I'm a good option," you say, being rational. Besides, playing detective could be fun.
"I feel uneasy about both possibilities. And you know that," Remus says, sounding like an overprotective boyfriend. You nod in response, assuring him that you'll be careful despite his concerns.
"Let's find out who's messing with you. Together," you say, a bit awkwardly. Remus gives you one last once-over and quietly leaves. You can't help but think that the hunt for the saboteur is officially on.
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lemoncrushh · 6 months ago
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Cubicle // 3) A Girl Like You
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STORY PAGE
Word Count: 1304
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Thursday // Roni
Once again, I had a hard time falling asleep last night. I couldn't get those eyes, lips and dimples out of my head. I also felt bad that I had such a grim reaction to his telling me his age. It really is no big deal to me, and I hope he knows that. I started circulating in my head different scenarios in which I would apologize to him. Of course, in my fantasies, Harry always kisses me or makes passionate love to me in the end. My brain is so dramatic.
To make matters worse, I actually woke up an hour before my alarm was to go off. I tossed and turned for twenty minutes before finally giving up and hopping in the shower. Some good came out of it, however. I got to work a little earlier, and Harry just happened to pull into the parking spot next to mine at the same time I was getting out of the car. I stopped on the sidewalk to wait for him.
"Good morning," he greeted as he slammed his door shut.
"Morning, Harry," I said, giving my best smile. Or at least the best smile I could muster on very little sleep.
We walked up to the office building together, exchanging small talk about work and the weather.
"By the way," he said as he held the door open for me. "Thanks for your email yesterday."
"You're welcome."
"I'm sorry I didn't reply to it. I got really busy, and I wanted to respond only when I had enough time to say what I wanted."
A little taken aback, I raised my eyebrows in question. "And what would that be?"
Harry looked down at his feet as he smirked. "No. You'll just have to wait for the email."
I playfully pouted as we continued inside the building. I stopped by my desk to drop off my handbag and then met Harry in the break room. Alice, a sweet timid girl from the accounting department was also there, stirring her tea. She gave me a quiet greeting as I poured myself some coffee.
"So who has plans this weekend?" I asked as I sat down at the table with Harry and Alice.
"I'm not doing anything," Alice replied softly. "I never do anything."
"No?"
Alice shook her head.
"What about you, Harry?"
"No plans yet," he answered, giving me the eye. "But that can always change."
"Hmm," I nodded. "Indeed."
"Well," Harry announced as he stood up, "you ladies have a lovely morning. I have an email to write."
"Bye, Harry."
He winked at me as he left the room. I wasn't sure if Alice noticed until I heard her pipe up.
"God, you're so lucky."
"Excuse me?" I glared at her.
"I've had a crush on him since he started working here. I don't think he even knows my name. But he's obviously into you," Alice said solemnly.
I didn't really know what to say. I mean, I had the feeling he liked me, but I didn't want to make someone else feel bad.
"I'm sorry, Alice," I finally spoke. "I didn't know you liked him."
"Eh, who doesn't, honestly," she retorted. "He's bloody gorgeous."
With that, she stood and gave me a quick "see ya" before heading out of the break room. I sat by myself until I'd completely drained my coffee cup, then headed back to my desk to anticipate Harry's email.
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Harry
I was really glad I ran into Roni this morning. All day yesterday I had been thinking about how to respond to her email. I didn't want it to be a quick message. I wanted to tell her how the age difference didn't matter to me if it didn't matter to her. I wanted to tell her other things, but I wasn't sure how she would take it. Maybe her quick email to me was only to be nice. Like a "nice knowing you, but you're too young for me" kind of thing.
But seeing her beautiful face as she stood there waiting for me to get out of the car sealed the deal. I knew she wasn't just being nice. Travis was right, she's into me. The way the corner of her mouth always curves up slightly whilst listening to me speak. When she licks that fucking delicious bottom lip. I want so bad to feel it on mine.
Feeling much more confident, I sat at my computer and began typing the email. I still knew however, that spilling my guts via inter-office correspondence would not be the wisest choice. If we're not even allowed to use the internet without being monitored, who knows what they do about tracking private messages.
So, I kept my words somewhat professional, yet a bit cryptic. Knowing that Roni is a smart and undoubtedly extremely clever woman, I reckoned she would understand and be able to read between the lines.
To: Graver, Veronica
From: Styles, Harry
Re: Weekly Update/Meeting
Ms. Graver,
It was a pleasure meeting you this week. Allow me to welcome you to the company. Regarding our previous discussion, I foresee no objection to future relations. After all, nineteen and twenty-seven are numbers I can certainly work with. I've checked my calendar, and I have an opening in the PM of Friday, or Saturday if that better fits your schedule. Please let me know, and do not hesitate to reach me on my personal line if you have any further questions.
Best regards,
Harry Styles
Below my name, I gave her my cell number. Then I got to work, hoping I'd get a response soon.
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Roni
How fucking cute is he? I giggled to myself as I finished reading his email, then read it again. I wanted to reply with an emphatic yes but knew that would not be appropriate in a work email, which I gathered were his intentions for writing something so business-like. So, I gave a short, similar response.
Mr. Styles,
Thank you for your email and your warm welcome. I shall be contacting you via your personal line so that we may discuss our future meeting in detail.
Sincerely,
Roni Graver
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Harry
I'd noticed Roni had replied to my email nearly forty minutes ago, but fucking Donald, my lame ass supervisor, had been going on and on about some account that had been waiting on their reports, which I knew I had finished and sent out last week. Then Nina, his secretary had to add fuel to the fire by telling me I had done them incorrectly because apparently, there was a change in the format that no one had bothered to tell me about.
After Nina had left, I eagerly opened the email. I grinned to myself as I read her words. Just as I was about to reply again, I heard my phone vibrate on my desk. I swiped it open to reveal a text.
Harry, you're such a clever lad. I would love to go out with you. I'm free all weekend, so you pick the time that's best for you. -Roni
After quickly saving her number in my contacts, I sent her a text back.
The sooner the better as far as I'm concerned. Tomorrow at 8?
Less than thirty seconds later she responded.
Sounds great! :) Can't wait.
I let out a deep breath I hadn't realized I was holding. I turned my attention back to my reports, but suddenly got an idea. Picking up my phone, I texted Roni again.
This might sound silly since we're going out tomorrow, but are you free for lunch?
As I waited for her text, I felt the presence of someone behind me. I turned my chair around to see Roni leaning against my cubicle partition.
"I thought you'd never ask."
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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 7 months ago
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So the situation in Space Oddity is of course an ugly mess for Aro because of all the complicated relationship and situational dynamics at play. Judging from your other metas, it feels like Tom saying he doesn't want to turn is mostly out of concern for Lily's feelings (the rest being negative first impressions). So if it was him alone, I feel he'd eventually agree to join the Volturi (not as much instinctive repulsion to vampirism, doesn't believe a way home is possible, attachments are more easily manipulated by Chelsea when the people aren't physically there).
But how would Lily alone, Lily with Harry, or Tom and Lily without Harry play out in terms of how much luck Aro has in getting anyone to turn?
Space Oddity by me and @therealvinelle and The Man Who Would Be King by me and @therealvinelle
Does Tom Want to Be a Vampire?
I'm very curious what other metas you mean because the answer is no and pretty much for the reasons he outlined. If you're talking about the one where I said he would like to become a vampire, there's a few key differences there that we'll get into. He likes Lily and all, but if he really wanted to do something he wouldn't sugar coat it or lie about it either.
Honestly, no, he meant every word he said.
The difference between Tom here and Tom in A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to London and How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bacchanals is a few key things. In the first, Tom's unbearably lonely and feels he's living a pointless life where he'll never amount to anything or do much of anything. Suddenly, a very exciting person is there with a mysterious mystery, to Tom the charm of being a vampire was having companionship and having an exciting new life. In Bacchanals it's similar in that while he has a good friend, he still feels his life is quite dull.
Tom in Space Oddity is much older, is convinced his life is great, and most importantly is already immortal. He doesn't have to achieve immortality and when the immortality being offer a) makes him an addict for blood in a way he'll never escape b) he gets the very fun offer of joining someone else's immortal army c) he will physically and mentally change as a person and you have Tom going very :/ even at the promise of more power (and that's very suspicious to him because what the fuck is that supposed to mean.)
Lily becoming a vampire is equally as bad for the same reasons. He'd lose control of his apprentice who would become an addict for human blood and would be inducted into someone else's undead army.
He ain't for it.
(I'm not saying it's not impossible he'd join if isolated, just Marcus and Chelsea would have their work cut out for them.)
Lily Alone
Lily alone is not for it but this is Voldemort 2: Electric Boogaloo, she has no idea how/if she can escape them and when she does try to run they find her very easily. Running more might just piss them off/make them decide she's not worth the risk so maybe better to just... try to strike some kind of a deal.
So we basically get what's been happening in the fic with the bonus of a) a lack of cover b) a lack of baby that prolongs how long they'll wait before turning her c) complete isolation again.
We see in the original fic Lily's relatively good at handling isolation/adversarial environments, she doesn't break with Tom or in Godric's Hollow for all things get very stressful, but here she also has someone who can a) manipulate how she feels about things b) if that doesn't work then there's the guy that sees every relationship she has and can act on that information.
It's not a good situation.
Lily with Harry
See above, but she has a little more time so Harry can grow to a point where he can be turned as well or Lily can let him live his life.
Tom and Lily without Harry
The fic except full throttle as Aro doesn't have to slow down for baby.
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hollowed-theory-hall · 8 months ago
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what do you think dumbledore’s letter to the durselys said? i always thought it was something threatening, especially considering the “remember my last” letter
I agree with you, from Petunia's reaction to the "remember my last" letter it very much seems like Dumbledore's first letter was a threat:
Aunt Petunia looked as though she might faint. She sank into the chair beside Dudley, her face in her hands. The remains of the envelope smoldered into ash in the silence. “What is this?” Uncle Vernon said hoarsely. “What — I don’t — Petunia?” Aunt Petunia said nothing. Dudley was staring stupidly at his mother, his mouth hanging open. The silence spiraled horribly. Harry was watching his aunt, utterly bewildered, his head throbbing fit to burst. “Petunia, dear?” said Uncle Vernon timidly. “P-Petunia?” She raised her head. She was still trembling. She swallowed. “The boy — the boy will have to stay, Vernon,” she said weakly.
(OotP, 40)
She seems petrified from fear. I think he made a threat of what would happen if Harry left their house before his 17th birthday. What exactly the threat was, I can't be certain, but for her to react like this it must be bad (or at least something Petunia thinks is bad).
Like, I'm thinking it's not something simple, that would cause discomfort, the threat must have been something more pressing. But, knowing Dumbledore, it wasn't a straightforward threat. It was the implication of horrifying death and torture to Petunia and her family if Harry left, but without actually saying the words. Just implying them. So she'd know, but he could always say he meant something else entirely.
I don't even know what he could say that will fit this criteria, but it's the sort of thing that's up Dumbledore's alley. Benign threat, I think that's what I'd call what he probably wrote there.
I doubt there was much in the way of explaining anything, like: "there will be no harm as long as Harry remains in your home,"
Which could refer to the blood protection on Harry (something I should write about eventually), but Petunia would more likely read as a threat to her own and her family's safety. That's like, the idea of the kind of threat and explanation he'd make.
Also, a non-specific threat can be way worse than a specific one. It leaves the threat up to your imagination, so you imagine the worst thing you can. A specific threat, well, it tells you exactly what will happen, and it might not be as bad as the person writing the threat thinks.
Things I think were in the letter, not necessarily in this order:
"Good evening, Mrs. Dursley" — I assume the letter was polite.
"It is most grave that I must inform you your sister, Lily, and her husband have been killed at the hands of a dark wizard"
"Before you is their son, Harry Potter, which I request you treat as your own" — he mentions something along these lines in HBP.
"I have left magic to ensure no harm will come as long as Harry is in your home until he reaches majority" — I don't think he explained anything further about the blood protections. Or who would come to harm.
"He will be expected to join Hogwarts when the time comes"
It was a very succinct letter that did everything Dumbledore needed it to with the minimal amount of words. That's what I'm thinking at least.
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elisedonut · 13 days ago
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🧡💛🖤🏳️‍🌈💀
🧡: What is a popular (serious) theory you disagree with?
Oh! I was going to say oh i can't really think of anything else other then Imperioused Percy but immediately after thinking that my brain went pst pssst Stan-
so yes
Stan Shunpike NOT being under an imperious during the last few books
he's not a bad guy he's just a dumbass who talks to much and said something stupid to a veela while trying to flirt
I know like where it comes from because Remus is all like 'this is war how could you possibly know that Harry you're being naive blah blah blah blah you should have killed him you idiot' *not actually what he said but something like that
but like idk Harry is so convinced of him being under and I believe him it makes the most sense to me also puts more weight to the claims of imperious from the first war if there is a character that we know of going through that
unlike Percy where being imperioused takes away from his arc and makes things just less fun Stan being sent to Azkaban on bs charges and getting broke out just to be imperioused and then have to live with that is fascinating to me
he still was an idiot and said something he shouldn't have but the punishment life throws him is so extreme in a way he really doesn't deserve
and there are so many DE characters that are just DE's that stripping one of the more complicated character situations and just changing it to that is just lame to me
a very boring choice imo
💛: What is a popular ship you just can't get behind, and why?
uhhhh most of them ngl but in specific
I'm not really into any of the endgame ships except like Bluer but Bluer isn't really popular
but to be fair I'm like that in most fandoms canon ships just don't tend to do much for me overall
I'm very picky on my Draco ships and for me Drarry and Dramione are both kind of yeah ok ig
Pretty much every big marauder era ship that is like a nobody characters
Like why would I ship Barty jr. with who ever Evan is when I can think about him wanting to break his dads new toy (Percy)
🖤: Which character is not as morally good as everyone else seems to think?
Molly Weasley I think she tries yes but i don't think she's as good of a person as some people try to act like she is
🏳️‍🌈: Which character who is commonly headcanoned as queer doesn't seem queer to you?
Most characters are inherently Bi to me just because so that's difficult
maybe Pansy??? i guess??
💀: If you had to choose one major character to die, who would you choose?
Hermione
Not that I don't like her and would be like happy that she died but because i think losing someone from the trio would have been neat and out of the choices (Her and Ron) she would be more fun to kill off since Ron already has the scare moment of him abandoning the group that I think would cheapen his death if he came back after that just to die
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