#not like that. and we can all coexist and I don’t need to feel pressured by their existence yknow

[faithfromanewperspective]

annual reminder to ask yourself am I a badass feminist who doesn’t believe in gender roles and is that why I feel so angsty when I’m around these traditional people, or is it gender dysphoria? because one of them says that they’re wrong for being so traditional and I have to open up their eyes to what liberation looks like and the other is just like. well they can do what they like but it’s simply not for me

[ask-carmenpondiego]

Chapter 21: No Place Like HQ For the Holidays

Once back at VILE HQ, the jet lands and the team disembarks, M procuring a wheelchair with his shadow powers and strapped Carmen in while he started to hum some carols. The mare sulked having to stay seated and not walking on her own. She did want to get up and about with these new augments so it wouldn’t slow her down. Deep down she knew it was for her own good and health to stay off her legs so they can heal properly within the cybernetic casing. “Can I at least have crutches?!” She had asked before they departed. “What? No! You put pressure on your arms the same way as your legs? You’ll blow the sutures and start bleeding all over my equipment!” She remembers Skyggja scolding her.

Blendin had already opened the double doors for the moving to begin. It didn’t take long for the HQ to be swarmed with flying and crawling drones carrying crates and boxes. Kiros went on ahead to help direct the drones with Skyggja’s help after Carmen explained which parts of the top floor was theirs. Carmen wheeled herself out of the way and into the living room, next to the big screen tv which blipped on by itself, 079’s face showing up rather annoyed. It took one look at Carmen and sighed. “Oh great. One of you is broken. This is why we cant have nice things..” She raised an eyebrow and smirked, “Good to see you too, 079. I’ll be adding two names to our household and they will be setting up a lab upstairs on the penthouse floor, so there may be another computer system connecting to ours. PLEASE behave and cooperate with these new agents. I don’t doubt they will attempt to delete you somehow if you start shit with them.” The ai rolled its eyes. “I’ll highly doubt they can but I suppose I can see what I can do to assist. I make no promises.” Carmen smiles and gives an awkward thumbs up, still getting used to the feel of the augments. “Thats all I ask, just a solid attempt in peaceful coexisting. I’ll even give you more monitors if you wish for around the HQ~” 079 gave a deadpan look with confetti and balloons on the screen. “Hooray. Now I wont have to squeeze into those abhorrent tiny screens on your mobile devices. Some of you really need to clear the phone storage from all that porn..”

Blendin hops over with a tablet to show his mother, “Hey Mom, I had some help with M and Kiros and.. 079? Anyway, we came together and we are working on a present for you! I am trying to share the knowledge of the ley line door travel system to your system so you can do what I do! Now, this stuff is super top secret so I could get in a whole lot of trouble for this if I’m caught BUT Kiros insisted that 079 will keep it under lock and key so no one else can track it! And there may be a way to even hook it up to your time machine! M said he’ll tinker with that later.”

Daring had wandered in and stayed a fair distance away and watched the two discuss the travel system. She scoffed as she saw Carmen get excited and hug Blendin, perhaps a little too tight. She didnt realize the added strength she had due to the new blood and augments, that is until he yelped. Daring was still trying to unfluff her feathers as she watched. She was glad a life wasn’t lost, even if it was one she still didnt trust. Perhaps she could tolerate her mother but she certainly kept her opinions known.

As far as she could tell, her brother had fallen right into his mother’s trap and just handed over the ability to steal everything from under everyone’s noses. There must be some way to stop it all. Her thoughts were jarred to a stop as striped arms suddenly wrapped around her from behind, picking her up and twirling her around, “Adora!!! This is a wonderful surprise!! Welcome home!! Lemme give you a big hug! Rrrrrrrr!” Waldo had snuck up on her in a way he would describe as very dad-like. Daring shrieked and flailed in his grasp, “Let me go! Help!” Carmen turned quickly, hearing the screech and instantly relaxed when she saw Wally try to be silly. “Wally!! Let her go, she’s not in the right mood right now.” He let her go with a playful pout, “Aww alright. I was just excited to see our baby girl again. You grew so tall! Look at you! Pretty soon you’ll fill out and be even more like your mom. She sure did give the attractive and smart genes to you, kids.” Daring huffed and straightened her clothes and tried smoothing out her feathers once again from puffing up “I am NOTHING like her! I may be glad she’s still here but I still think she’s up to no good!” She pointed to her smirking mother.

Wally looked over at Carmen for the first time since she came back and stopped short, worry plastered across his face. “My light! Are you ok? I heard there was an incident but it wasn’t specified how bad! What.. your hair, your arms.. legs.. your color.. what happened?!” Carmen started to explain, then when she heard the words coming from her own mouth, the realization of everything started to hit. Her eyes suddenly were pouring tears, and her new hands shook. She finally had a moment to truly process. She reached up to Wally who knelt down and embraced her so tightly, crying as well, “Please.. my light, please take this as a sign to stop. I know you are trying to help cure me but let’s.. just try to find a doctor or something. You’re risking your life to save mine, the accidents are getting more frequent and more dangerous… I want you to stop stealing. Please.” Carmen wiped her eyes, pulling away as she calmed down, making herself push the panic aside, “I can’t. I still have to try. Its what I’m good at, its what I do. Its not like they’ll accept me back into the detective programs..they’ll just throw me back into that horrible place to forget about me.” Blendin hugs his mom around the neck from behind the wheelchair, nuzzling comfortingly, “We wont let anyone take you or any of your agents away from us! And we’ll find a cure, Right Dad?” Wally smiled a little worriedly, “You said it. Now lets get you cleaned up and settled from that trip, maybe some relaxing time in front of the tv or something..” Carmen scoffed with some tears still brimming her eyes, “Relaxing in front of the tv? So I can get lazy and fat you mean?” She teased, wiping her eyes.

Daring crossed her arms and stood brooding from across the room. Ninoga and Kiros were lifting a heavy piece of furniture through the doorway and had to pass in front of Daring. She caught a glimpse of the muscles on both agents and blushed, looking away. “Excuse us, little snack. Don’t want to squish you.” Kiros chuckled with a low teasing rumble, winking at her. She turned scarlet in the face and hurried over to her family, “Guys, where’s the bathroom?!” Wally pointed just down the hall as Carmen looked at her and then at Kiros having a belly laugh while the young pegasus rushes off. “So THATS why it smells like Teen Spirit on Prom Night in the jet! Kiros! You are a scoundrel!”

Kiros shrugged as he held the furniture while Ninoga was pivoting, “I didn’t do a damn thing but I know you wouldn’t have me any other way!” He grinned, now on the move to set the furniture to its proper place. Lekir set a box down, which was picked up by a crawling drone and scuttled off, the vesk stepping out of its way with a bit of a gruff. “Its already like an infestation of these drones, you sure you wanna bring them here?” Carmen nodded, “I can tell this is the break they needed, just like they gave us a break. We have the room and they can be very helpful to us.” Lekir crouched beside her as Wally was busy looking through the tv channels. “How are you feeling? Any pain or anything?” She brushed her fingers through Carmen’s hair as Carmen put on a smile, “I feel great, I cant wait to try to get back on my feet. Wally wants me to relax… and to stop thieving.”

They look over to Wally who had been channel surfing and was currently dancing to some up beat music, occasionally singing along, before changing the channel again, “Mum!….Dad!…..Bingo!…..BLUEY! Man, Kid shows are so fun these days!… Ooooh baking competition! Thats not a cake!!… IT IS A CAKE!! Blendin! Are you seeing this?!” Lekir dropped her face to deadpan, “You? Stop thieving? Heh, thats not going to happen, is it?” She watches Wally pretty much jostle his son in excitement of a purse being sliced and revealing cake. “I will never be able to fathom what you see in him..” She stands up, her hands on her hips. Carmen smiles, “I dunno, he makes me laugh like theres not a care in the world.”

That night, after all the moving had calmed down, they all gathered around the dining room table. A couple stacks of pizza were on the kitchen island nearby, half already emptied. Carmen looked around as they all chattered, dishes and cups clinking, and all she could think about was that she had spent so much time trying to get to this point. But she found it was all worth it. She finally had connections with her family and made new family along the journey. She actually felt complete for once in a very long time.

The sounds of the gathering played over a speaker for a few moments more before a hand reached and switched it off. “This does not sound like a funeral dinner, does it?” A lower ranking gentleman in a suit lowered his head, “N-no sir. It does not.” The one in the chair facing him turned, picking up the umbrella that was placed onto the desk between them, inspecting it closely. “What does it sound like to you?” The younger rank, gulped, “A..a happy celebration, sir?” The blade sliced out from the tip and back in with a press of a button. “A happy celebration. Now. Your task was simple. I see no malfunction in your equipment so the failure rests with you. You told me, no. You ASSURED me that you would have this taken care of.” The lower rank stammers, “I made sure she was gravely hurt, at the very least, if she had a big enough injury, she would not continue.. we wouldn’t need to resort to eradicating her..” They look at the expressionless form of their higher rank. “It seems like you have forgotten what we stand for. Therefore, I will rectify your errors and put you on a path of clarity.”They press a few buttons on the console as a swarm of nanites suddenly covered the lower rank for a split moment and then returned to the opening they had come through. The lower rank just collapsing to the floor, all signs of life removed without cause nor damage or anything, as if every bit of life force was simply consumed and destroyed right from the source, without so much of a sound from the victim. Within moments, two workers came in and took the body to the incinerators. They press the intercom, “Send Mali Negatta into the field, we have a holiday gift to give the thief on this naughty list.”

A voice came over the intercom in return, “Hey all, this is Mali, I’m not available right now but I will return to accept any jobs starting in the new year! Otherwise, stop calling. Byieeee” The higher rank sighed and sat back in the chair. “What a christmas miracle. Well, all things come to those who wait..”

[showtoonzfan]

If you’re not familiar with the musical “Ride The Cyclone” and it’s current script situation with one of its main characters, this post is not for you! Thank you!

So I understand the “Ride the Cyclone” Fandom is really upset, including me ESPECIALLY and we all have a right to be, but I think at the same time, we all need to realize these four things regarding the “Ricky Potts script change” situation: Keep in mind I am NOT disabled so I don’t want to speak for anyone else, but I do want to share important things that I think most of the fandom needs to acknowledge:

Despite the change being an unnecessary piss poor decision and a HUGE downgrade compared to what the script was like before, we need to acknowledge that Ricky STILL has a disability. He may not have the same one he had before, but being mute from trauma is in fact a disability. I say this because everyone keeps saying he’s no longer disabled and that’s just not true. Again, it was still a bad change but his disability wasn’t completely erased like everyone keeps saying.

Disability representation in theater and casting more actors with said disability’s is something that NEEDS to be spoken up about, but harassing the creators and actors are NOT the way to do it. If you’re just telling the crew to off themselves and painting them as one note monsters, that is not getting anyone anywhere, and not helping.

Speaking of portraying people as one note, some of y’all honestly need to stop painting Brooke Maxwell and Jacob Richmond (the writers of the original script) as irredeemable monsters. Again, this issue in theater is something that desperately NEEDS to be spoken up about, and voices need to be heard, but as much as I hate to say it, we really DON’T know all the details on why the script was changed. We don’t know what was going through the writers heads, we DON’T know the full story, so seeing everyone say the writers changed it simply because they were ableist and nothing else are just jumping to conclusions way too early. Regardless if you think they’re truly ableist or not, regardless if you’ve lost all respect for them, these writers are still PEOPLE at the end of the day, and people make mistakes. There is always room to grow, there is always room to learn and improve. We need to actually speak up and inform them that this change was not a good one, instead of just screaming at them, sending threats and calling them ableist pieces of shit, something that I’ve seen SO many people do and it’s an issue. It’s hard to actually IMPROVE yourself when everyone is just calling you bad names and not seeing you as a layered person.

At this point of making this post, people really need to stop arguing with Kholby Wardwell (actor for Noel Gruber) on twitter. I don’t care if you like him, I don’t care if you don’t like him……STOP….arguing with him. I shouldn’t say everyone is, but there are a few, and there’s no point guys, stop harassing him. He’s made it clear on how he feels about all of this, and its obvious at this point, nobody can change his mind on his viewpoints. People also need to stop calling him ableist as well, because if you’ve read his twitter thread, you can tell he never had malicious intent. Of course I’m not excusing some of the way he worded or said things, but again, these issues for the RTC crew as a whole need to stop being viewed with a one note lens. While it’s not hard to say ��theater needs to hire more disabled actors and make it accessible for them”- it’s ALSO not hard to NOT see everything as black and white, mainly the motivations behind the writers and actors. These are all things that need to coexist within the fandom, and people also need to stop pressuring the others to speak on this subject. Again, when you speak up about an important subject matter like this, doing it with aggression is not the way to go.

With all of that said, this script change has heavily disappointed me, even hurt me. I personally thought it was perfectly okay for Ricky to be a kid who got a degenerate disease at 6 years old and lost his ability to walk and talk, but somehow the writers felt the need to change it. It was unnecessary in my opinion, because I felt like the script wasn’t really the issue, it was casting able bodied actors as disabled characters, and getting rid of Ricky’s crutches five minutes into the show. That, as well as treating his disability as a joke, mainly the comments by Ocean. These were all criticisms the show has gotten over the years, so it hurts to see that what we got was the writers idea of “improving” that. Instead of “improving” it however, it felt more like they erased the issue so they wouldn’t get controversy and could avoid the problem, without putting in the effort. HOWEVER, despite that I don’t truly feel like that was the writers intentions. For now, I’ll give the writers the benefit of the doubt, because I do believe that they truly felt like they were helping and encouraging the disabled community, even if the outcome didn’t turn up that way. Again, we STILL don’t know the full story, so I sincerely hope Brooke Maxwell and Jacob Richmond come out with an official statement soon giving us the full insight to why they did what they did, since the new script has gotten so much backlash. It’s clear this change has done more harm than good, and with respect, I hope the writers can be educated and more open minded to why their idea wasn’t the best at all. I have always praised the writing of this musical, I haven’t been in the fandom that long but it has become one of my current favorite musicals of all time, and Ricky Potts has always been a character I adored, and he deserves SO much better. For all of this to happen because of one huge fuckup, hurts. At the end of the day, we all want the same thing. We all want disabled people to be treated like human beings, with respect, and have more accessibility, not just in theater, but EVERYWHERE. We all have a right to be mad, we all have a right to speak up, and I just hope that as a society we all can educate one another without it being taken too far. I sincerely wish the fandom, the writers, everyone, can bounce back from all of this, and society improves as a whole when it comes to the disabled. I will still continue to enjoy Ride the Cyclone, and watch it over and over because no script change can get in the way of my enjoyment of the show. With that said, things NEED to change, and I especially hope the Mccarter Theater gets the consequences to their horrendous action of illegally firing it’s only disabled actor. With that said, feel free to say your thoughts, feel free to disagree, I just needed to get this all out. Thank you for reading.

[scorchieart]

AAAAAAHHHHH I'm so excited! I love the prompts so much!! I hope these aren't taken but can you do Yves & Chevalier/ prompt 1 / angst / 1st pov Yves? A story where Yves has to stand up to Chevalier but he's so scared, but he does it anyway. I'm typing this so fast in case it's gone. Thank you writer!!!💕💕

Characters: Yves Kloss & Chevalier Michel

POV: 1st person (Yves) Genre: Angst

Prompt #1: "What are you waiting for?" "That, I cannot say."

Wordcount: 1047

A/N: This was my reaction when I read the request: 🤩😲😢 Yes, I am aware I went over my own imposed wordcount limit, but shhhhhh....Angst and adventure tied in the poll, so strap your boots for next time!

He will arrive at twilight — the man whose reputation preceded him, yet I only understand fragments. The man who held his quarry captive with silken threads bound by mystique and promises. The man whose name alone evoked despair. Like a pestilence. Like a curse. Like me.

I run my thumbs across the braided handle of the basket in my lap to keep my hands occupied, but my tapping heel ruins all hope of maintaining covertness. The sound ricochets off the crumbling soot-stained walls like crows accosting one another, and though it’s slowly driving me insane, I don’t stop. At the very least, I feel a little less alone.

Aside from my horse, I truly am alone here. I arrived mid-afternoon to scope out the place, though I was ill-prepared for the actual size. The way Clavis described it, the castle ruins were a broken shell of supposed former glory. A motley of derelict pillars and archways encircling rotting rooms picked clean of treasures and life. Yet I could still spot its majestic ramparts on my approach, saluting me as the dying sun pressed me forward.

Clavis said we would meet in the throne room, and even though I could tell where it was the moment I stepped inside, the first room to the right, I saved it for last. I wanted to make sure we would not be interrupted, yes, but more so I was curious to learn of a people who coexisted on a land undivided by borders. My search yielded naught; those bandits left no decrepit corner unsullied.

Sunset blares deceptive crimson through the glassless windows as I wrap my riding cloak more tightly around myself. We are not yet in the thralls of winter. Could I even survive in the land beyond the ruins? I hear my horse whinnying sadly, and I open my basket, produce the sack of sugar cubes, and cross to the exit, still swaddling the cloak around my body. A fresh set of apologies wets my freezing lips as I round the corner to the castle entrance, but both the “sorry”s and my legs stop short when two horses come into view over the threshold. 

I release the cloak and reach for my saber, but I already know it’s too late. The twisted solace I find in the moment is the icy tip on my nape is familiar.

“What are you waiting for?” Chevalier’s voice and his sword release a new chill down my spine that paralyzes me so firmly the sugar sack slips out my grasp. 

“Th-that… I cannot say,” I whisper, my racing heart doing nothing to bring back my senses. I can’t turn to face him, but it doesn’t take a genius to tell he’s not pleased.

“You cannot by choice or coercion?” he growls, pushing the sword harder against my neck, but I know he hasn’t broken skin; I would have felt the warmth of blood.

“Did Clavis tell you?” I ask. Somehow, the thought of Clavis watching, turncoat smirk and all, brings me a sickening sense of comfort. It would mean I’m not alone with Chevalier.

“He didn’t need to,” says Chevalier, maintaining the same pressure on my neck. “You are more aloof than usual, barely speaking at mealtimes and retiring earlier in the evenings. Not a single tea party was held this past week, and you were almost always absent from the kitchens. Sure enough, your horse was missing in the morning.”

I swallow my breath, and it lands in my stomach like a hunk of lead. “You have been watching me?”

“Don’t act so surprised. The movements of every person entering and exiting the palace are under my purview. Especially those who wish not to be seen. Ah —” He lowers his sword, but I am no less tense as he passes me into the throne room. He reappears with the basket, inspecting the contents like he’s just got his hands on a limited edition book series.

“A worthy effort. Though poisons will not suffice on him,” he says, holding a gingersnap biscuit to the horizon.

“They’re not poisoned!” I blurt out, swiping the basket and hugging it to my chest. “You can eat that one to check.”

“Then you do not deny they are meant for someone else?” he says, tossing the cookie at me. I take my time catching and replacing it in the basket to avert my eyes. 

“I will not contradict you, Prince Chevalier,” I say, pretending to rearrange fudge squares, “but this is a matter beyond your purview. Kindly leave.”

“You are aware you speak with the leader of Rhodolite’s foreign affairs faction while standing on the border with our greatest adversary?” His voice is level and without malice, yet my toes still curl reflexively.

“Yes,” I say.

“Then I ask once more, and pray I do not repeat a third time,” he steps directly in front of me. “What are you waiting for?”

I bite my lip to stop my jaw from trembling. My eyes sting with the woes I’ve locked away for decades. The ones Clavis weaseled out of me when he discovered my correspondence last week. The ones I will not compromise even for the Brutal Beast.

I inhale deeply, raise my head, and glare back at Chevalier. “For you to leave… please,” I hastily add on.

He regards me in silence, like a hunter watching a dying animal, contemplating whether it would be kinder to end my misery than watch me suffer.

“He cannot give you what you seek. He was a child himself when she came to Rhodolite,” he says morosely.

I grip the basket so tightly splinters dig into my palms. “Even still, I must know what he can tell me. It is more than you or your books ever could.”

He breaks eye contact first, opening the basket and picking a gingersnap. “I’d like to know, too,” he says, biting down brusquely. He then retrieves the fallen sugar sack and walks off, and I catch my breath as warmth refills my senses.

“What are you waiting for?” he calls to me from the dilapidated doorway. His blade gleams under the rising moon as he produces it once more, and it is only then that I notice the navy tinge of evening has enveloped us all. What he says next makes me immensely relieved I am not alone.

“He is here.”

Mark my words, the day when I properly write Gilbert into a fic is approaching. It's just not today.

Tagging:@atelieredux @queengiuliettafirstlady @violettduchess @venulus @thewitchofbooks @leonscape @rhodolitesrose @venti-tangents @dear-sciaphilia @ikesenwritings @myonlyjknight

If you would like to be added or removed from my tag list, please send me an ask or a message.

[sam-not-sammie]

Seeing a conversation about being kind to others be stripped of its nuance and turned into a debate on whether or not people deserve human decency just based on the concept that people are overworked and are “too tired” for social interaction is so disheartening to me.

No one expects you to be everyone’s best friend, but acknowledging someone’s existence and experience is a free action and allows for overall a more positive and meaningful experience for everyone involved!

I work an incredibly emotionally and mentally strenuous job, and yes, I am EXHAUSTED at the end of the day. On top of it all, I am chronically ill, disabled, and also the primary financial provider for my family. So yeah, it’s exhausting to work over 40 hours a week, and still have more to do outside of that.

That being said though, it is not my right to take that out on the people I work with whether they are coworkers or clients. It is my job not just as an employee but as a fellow HUMAN to greet, meet, and provide a base level of care and sympathy, especially when the people I work with are almost always dealing with external pressures and issues too. It is not my place to be the judge of who is and who isn’t deserving of kindness and respect.

I understand being tired. I understand being disabled. I understand living in the hell that is late-stage capitalism. And at the same time, I am able to understand that all of humanity is in this together, many of us trying our damnedest to make it by day by day.

Something else I’m seeing people not understand is that just because something is not a third space to you, does not mean it isn’t for others, and just because you are having a bad time doesn’t give you the right to take it out on other people, especially when you have no idea what someone else is going through.

“Well but third spaces are places where people can socialize outside of work or school!”

Ok, but even in common third spaces like parks, libraries, shopping malls, people STILL work, and its important to understand that a third space to you is not always what a third space is to someone else. It is unfair to treat others poorly just because “your third space isn’t a grocery store/bank/school.” What about the gardeners and landscaping staff who keep your third space park in order? What about the librarians? What about office workers? Or teachers?

There’s nuance to this conversation because people forget that for so many people who are overworked, they don’t have access to third spaces that are typically enjoyed by others! But dont they deserve kindness and respect at their third spaces? Does the ER nurse who is severely overworked and underpaid deserve to be treated like they are invisible or worse, like shit, when they are simply trying to grab a meal at a fast food chain? Do restaurant employees deserve to be completely dismissed when going to the bank to deposit their tip money? Do teachers deserve to be ignored when they try to make conversation in the break room, just because “they’re at work so it’s not a third space”?

No! This is why the conversation about community and basic kindness is so important! Kindness is free and it doesn’t take that much more energy to give basic decency to others. Toxic individualism and bastardized therapy speech has convinced people that their own self comfort is more important than being considerate of other’s circumstances regardless of what they might be. Was it difficult for me to feel like myself after experiencing a horrendous flashback? Yes. Was it also amazing to see the face of the trans woman I worked with (immediately after said flashback) light up when i told her that she wasn’t alone and that her name was beautiful? Also yes!

These things can coexist and if we want to foster community and a better existence, we need to prioritize taking it upon ourselves to create that better experience for all we come in contact with. It cannot happen overnight and it cannot happen without radical action.

[xoamandafrances]

S3 Ep:12 Overwhelmed AF? Four Things to Remember as a Money Mama

Hello! Welcome to the And She Rises (The F*ck Up) — the podcast! We are so happy you are here.

In today’s episode, Amanda riffs on four things to remember when you’re feeling overwhelmed AF. 

These four clips were taken from our newest course — Money Mama.

Money Mama is currently open for enrollment and marked at a special price. All the things you need to know:

https://amandafrances.com/money-mama

Here are the riffs from today’s podcast:

1. You are always… you. When I became a mom, fortunately, I managed not to feel a total identity crisis. I never exactly felt like I lost myself. Mostly, I felt like I had myself, and my self care, and my family, and my work, and my baby the whole time and a decent balance of it all. Here is how I’ve thought of things: I have allowed parts of me to take a backseat position — they were still there, but they just aren’t running the show full-time anymore. However, those parts of me are available as I need them. And as I make space for them. I don’t feel like the Money Queen 100% of the time right now, but she has her moments. My strategy is to: Let myself evolve. Let yourself become the new you. And let the parts of you that used to be the main you, show up as needed. Every version of you gets to coexist.


2. Slow down to expand time. When I slow down, so does time. I like to move fast and I like to get a lot done. I have been in the illusion that the faster I move, the more I get done, but I have realized that that isn’t true. When I find space in the moments of whatever I have to do — space to be present and check in with myself and slow down — there is more room. I make more space as I find more space. Everything gets… bigger. In my illusion of “go fast to get everything done,” I was always frantic and overwhelmed. I was less present. Ask yourself: Are you being present with yourself? Or are you checked out? If your time is a resource and you are here to use it well, where are you using it well and where are you using it in ways that do not feel good or work for you?


3. Take the pressure off. Have you ever noticed that when you want something or think it would be really cool or fun or lovely for something to happen, but you don’t need it… it is able to show up? Like your lighthearted desire… makes the way. Which is all great and fine, until it’s time to call in something we… need. (Think Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs: We can’t focus on the fun stuff when we’re worried about our basic needs.) Needing it and needing it now can create pressure and… resistance. And the feeling of more space between us and what we want. However, if we can get ourselves into a space of lightheartedness and trust around the thing we need — we can move a lot more energy and make a lot more room for it to come in. But if you can get yourself to think about the thing that you’re needing from a place of, it’s possible, and it’s easy, and it’s coming, and I take the pressure off, and I know I am fine, and I know I will not die, and I know it’ll come through — more desire based and less need based — that is a much easier place to not just manifest and call something in from, but to think creatively from to find your solution.


4. Release the mom guilt. Guilt is not helpful. Guilt is not useful. Guilt is only helpful if it helps us realize that we didn’t like how we showed up in a situation and we would like to choose a new path. Guilt can be helpful to that exact degree, but past that… guilt is not very useful. Ruminating in our guilt turns to shame, and shame is an awful, awful motivator for change. It doesn’t work. Remind yourself: There’s always a new moment. There’s always opportunities to try again. We’re moving forward, always.

Money Mama is only open for enrollment (and marked at the special price!) for a short time — I wouldn’t wait.

If you are feeling the vibe, I can't wait to see you inside.

To you and your glorious, big, bold, beautiful life.

Your rules. Your way.

- Amanda & Team AF

Check out this episode!

[faithfromanewperspective]

urban designer muses, 2023

See, in my head there was a golden era of human connection in almost every culture, thrust upon us by the proximity to each other (and our occupation/work) by the very need for safety. safety in numbers, in shared causes of survival of the tribe, a sense of belonging and purpose. It wasn’t so ideal, I know, people died, anyone who didn’t fit in never got to find people who were more like them. I don’t really want that. 

And maybe I’m blessed in modern culture that we have travel and we have technology and we have ways I could find people who think like me, that I’m not stuck with my visionary ideas ricocheting through my head for connection and better greater belonging and purpose that no one asks about meaning the pressure builds up so high that I lose my grip on reality among those ideas I have no way of anything close to implementing all on my own. Maybe I’m blessed I can blog them online and travel to or attend virtually conferences of people who are putting together similar plans. Read books by them. There are 8 billion of us here after all. 

But if you know me you also know I’m terribly skeptical and cynical of all things colonialism, all things industrial revolution, all things Rational Economic Man, all things stoicism that seem to come exclusively from those who like to lord power over others and strip the humanity of all of us until we’re polished shells of people, starting with themselves. None of that connection beyond the superficial, and if that doesn’t meet your needs there’s something wrong with you. I think it’s what leaves us longing, rightly, for something more, spiritual, supernatural, divine. You can see why when this very culture is reflected in faith spaces it’s so much worse than outside: this place that claims to be for people like me who claim to believe in what I do, expects me to be just the same as the culture and the air we breathe. Doesn’t know how to handle me when I’m not. Doesn’t know how to handle any of the people who’ve come through our doors who aren’t actually, I’ve watched so many of them leave, a little piece of me dying every time. And those of us here—we just want connection don’t we? Connection with God and each other. We want that empathetic witness to what we go through in life because we know it isn’t that happy facade at all times. Good. But my theory is this culture has been around so long that we’re all so empty and drained because of it; none of us have the resources to be the first ones to set a culture of vulnerability, when we can’t without having someone to carry our hurts, and there’s no one there who can be that—the natural cycles are out of whack, a lot like the carbon and nutrient cycles of our planet. None of us have the capacity in us to sit there patient and try again and again to slowly help our loved ones feel more comfortable to open up even as we see them stuck in their own heads and shame and the fact that for so much of our weeks, our time, our nervous systems don’t feel that kind of safety and the moments that they do, the hurt just spills out and can’t be communicated maturely in a way that builds strong and vulnerable community. There’s a greater need for support than anyone can give. 

I think in a culture that values individual success and achievement and having space from others when they annoy you instead of working around your needs and threshold and creating healthy boundaries so you can coexist, we don’t think that the average person needs it. We are none of us trained to give that, properly, we’ve not had people be that for us, well, except for God. And when we have that, we don’t see it, because no one has modelled it to us and we don’t think we need it. We don’t realise our community relies on it, little bit by little bit, giving and taking it in a way that creates balance, creates equality in the banks of social capital and tanks of capacity to give, as we invite more people in rather than turn them away. 

Of course to get there we need a lot of emotional maturity and ability to give, through things like therapy and I might also say education. But most of all we need the time and space to dedicate to this in a sustainable manner. I’ve done so in an unsustainable manner before, not realising what I was coming to to fill me up and then pouring out from, had me pouring more and being filled up less until all that was left for me to do was step back and analyse that need. One I saw all around me and everything we did drained us more and the math didn’t add up. We were feeding each other the gospel without ever applying it to address this pressing need that was obvious to me but apparently not everyone else, something that might have us functioning better, reaching out better in love and community and bringing people in, showing the gospel with our lives: we are liberated to connect. We are equipped to show radical love. 

I am now when I pace myself, but something about this community drains me more than it equips me and if it’s a choice between being able to give something sometimes or participate and vaguely give to the community but go away feeling drained and unable to give anywhere else—including the job that I support myself with—I know which one I’m going to choose. For so long I didn’t. 

And somehow I think I’m not the only one. I’m unique in that I’m southeast asian and naturally tend towards more community-centred interaction and collectivist responsibility. I’m unique in that I grew up in western sydney and had that loyal hard work and resourceful problem-solving attitude that doesn’t see community and relationships as transient but rather something to work on building from a very young age. I don’t understand how people cut and run. I don’t understand how they think about what they can get unless their bodies force them to. Part of that is related to my faith too. Maybe it contributes to my curiosity and constant stream of ideas on how we show the gospel to more people and throw off whatever in our culture is unhelpful. Ideas I feel desperate to at least talk about because of all the need around me. That I felt the structures of ministry actually holding me back from meeting. The community I thought I was in exhausting me, no one there to listen when I wanted to fix it, work on it, but I knew I couldn’t do it alone. People who, bless them, felt nothing was wrong and it is such a privilege to feel that from the status quo, not have to invest all your emotional energy into living with the feeling of injustice everywhere. 

I guess we’ve lived in this normalised superficial connection, living in what most of history would consider mansions one for each nuclear family, nucleated, requiring a car and a concrete plan in order to have a deep conversation with someone, actually connect, with anyone who isn’t your parents, children, siblings, or spouse if you’re married. The ecosystem is simply too small to meet our needs and I think we just forgot we have them? No wonder youth love camps so much. It’s a different community setup, something that meets the needs we have that the setup of our settlements have taken away from us. Would it be that we could congregate at the church after work and it only be a minute’s walk home after. Would it be that connecting with this community didn’t take up our entire Sunday, so that we could have some time to do our chores and connect with our family, as well as get our in the community and connect there too. Outreach. But the design of our city functions to keep us as far away from each other as possible. 

Let me unpack that. Basically, we’re designed around cars, which keep us from interacting in transit with those close in proximity to us except in road rage. Our jobs are transient and we don’t live near them, resulting in long and lonely commutes that extend our work days by hours. We’re left with little interaction in our schedules except with those we live with and share facilities with, or those we work with, or do hobbies with if we have time and money for them. Which you have to drive to, like church. Our schedules are organised around work, sleep, whatever we put in them—little incidental interaction and a lot of striving towards what we do for work, doing better at our hobbies, being a better, kinder person to those we live with. And when we do interact outside it’s a show, for the Pinterest house or the Instagram story about our gatherings—not always, but when you’re invited in first, you have to get through these and spend the required money and do the required tidying in hope that someone lets you in deeper as you keep extending the invitation. 

As young adults, we have work and study and hobbies and we long for the connection of camps whether we live with our parents—or we live out of home and struggle to pull together rent so that we can work a bit closer to that. But the locations we can find housing in impact this, impact our access to our loved ones who we are properly close with, we end up shuffled around for work, we can’t live close to the church or other base for community in order that it might have the least barriers (many of us are disabled, neurodivergent, many of us are struggling in different ways and society often doesn’t help us meet our needs) and barriers are just too many. We learn to live without that biblical connection we long for. 

We learn to study and get jobs and maybe afford therapy, but we only live one day at a time. Maybe we get cynical, maybe we struggle more and more socially, maybe we never end up being able to reach out to the new person and maybe we lose the ability to reach out beyond our faith. I’ve seen it. I’ve seen it go on and spiral further and I’ve seen many give up on creating a community in which we can heal and let down our guards and actually grow. I’ve seen the way we as a church, people of all ages, hide behind our serving roles—I know this doesn’t work for me. I know I long for more, to do more, to prayerfully sustain myself in community as I do—and I need community who can support me in that, I can’t do it alone. 

So I don’t know what to do except create a vision of a better way to settle and dwell as humans who care for the world—a way that facilitates our caring, a way that optimises our emotional energy and creates the most social capital, academically this is the thing that keeps community organisations and churches going and functioning, even if they also require money donated and we also believe in a supernatural provision—this provision comes in the form of financial yes but mostly social capital. I’ve exhausted myself because I know when I’m fed in community I do have that. But when my needs aren’t met I have to look after myself. I’ve spent so much of my life trying to turn around this freight train of our culture and now I’m doing the smart thing: getting qualified to lay the tracks. 

This is why I can’t at the moment serve in any other way. But I can analyse demographic patterns of poverty and how that flows on in areas of little access to resources and I can analyse the impact of growing up middle class and suddenly being an adult, perhaps a burnt out gifted kid, who suddenly has to work for the most basic things. I can analyse how these areas, the areas many of us might move to and be surprised, have higher rates of domestic violence mental illness and greater need for the gospel and its implicit empathetic witness to our pain and captivity, but less resources to pour this out. I can analyse how people who don’t interact with those experiencing these things and learn their stories tend to blame them or not believe their needs. I can weave these strings together as I come up with ideas, it’s what I do best. 

But as I zoom into a group of young people who don’t know how to have the leadership and emotional maturity to create a spiritually mature group—a demographic in social poverty who have grown up, the first generation outside a few selective schools academically, pressured to perform and view any kind of productivity and performance over connection—not to invest in social capital, not to invest in each other when our pressures on our time of study and work are too much. Both men and women now, it used to only be men. I don’t know what anyone else has been ordained to do, but for me I can rebel against the world by using my productivity to build relationships. Build community. And maybe that’s the thing we all need to be convicted of. Rooted in the convictions we have, but actually making a difference in the choices that we make: a practical theology, not just a belief

[blackstarising]

ok i promised myself up and down i wouldn’t make posts like this anymore for my own mental health but i’ve been seeing a lot of, uh, takes in regards to the potential of sarah and bucky dating and a lot of confusion to why these takes are racist, insulting and hurtful, especially to black people. and for me? well, i won't lie, it's personal.

what non-black people need to understand is that positive portrayals of interracial romantic relationships between dark-skinned black women (yes, dark skinned) and non-black men are extremely uncommon in media. for example, can you think about any recent fictional portrayals of relationships of this kind? maybe rick and michonne from the walking dead? or abbie and ichabod from sleepy hollow? great, because those are the only two that i can think of off the top of my head.

okay, now how many of those relationships ended happily?

right.

as a next point, why do i highlight ‘dark-skinned’? because of colorism. you’ve probably seen that word thrown around a lot more in the past year. colorism is the discrimination within ethnic groups between those with lighter colored skin (and more eurocentric features and hair texture, i’m folding in featurism and texturism for ease) and those with darker skin.

the way this plays out in visual media is that it’s much more common to see lighter skinned black women in roles than darker skinned black women. when i was growing up, this was evident in both white-produced AND black-produced media. that’s so raven. sister sister. my wife and kids. the proud family, even. and to make it worse, it wasn’t uncommon for dark skinned black women in shows like these to be portrayed as unattractive, uncultured, or straight up bullies.

this isn’t me saying that we shouldn’t see light skinned or biracial black women in media. i want to emphasize that their life experiences and the pressures they have are different from mine. but i know that, because of colorism, i grew up thinking that the absence of Eurocentric features and a non Eurocentric body meant i was not beautiful and not worthy to be seen. and these truths can coexist. this is not an uncommon wound of colorism.

i say all this to say that for bucky barnes, a white man, to flirt with sarah wilson, a dark skinned black woman, is not the same as ‘just another het ship’. it is positive representation in its own right.

now, i’ve been in fandom for years. i’ve encountered this before. and i’ve encountered this enough to know that truthfully, these kind of ships make people truly uncomfortable and sometimes these people do a bad job of hiding it. what reason, i can’t say. if you ask me, i suspect part of the discomfort comes non-black people realizing they can’t project onto the black person in the ship in the same way they’re used to. i could be wrong. but i’ve been around enough to see a lot of pretzeling and back bending to discredit these sorts of relationships that don’t seem to come up for similar pairings if that same black woman was now white. and i’m seeing it again here, so i wanted to break down the most common takes i’ve either seen or i suspect i’ll see soon and break them down to explain why exactly you’ve been getting irritated replies and why they’re hurtful.

“bucky’s flirting with sarah to make sam jealous.” without thinking about it, this is actually a funny trope. sibling rivalry and all that. and you’re right, bucky doesn’t have to be attracted to sarah, and maybe you ship sambucky instead. but what if he can still find her attractive? this take subtly discredits the idea that bucky could find sarah attractive in her own right - there has to be some ulterior motive in order to explain it, yeah?

“bucky repeated sarah’s name like that because sarah was steve’s mom’s name.” we do know bucky knows steve’s mom’s name! but again, this feels like a lot of reaching to again, rework bucky’s potential attraction to sarah in a different context so it’s not actually genuine. in this case, he doesn’t like her, she just makes him think of his dead best friend’s mom, right?

“sarah’s so strong and badass, she doesn’t need a man! she deserves better.” okay. what does ‘deserving better’ actually mean? why can’t a potentially fulfilling relationship for sarah, a hardworking widow with two children, be deserving better? this also plays into the Strong Black Woman myth, in which black women are just So Strong and Self Sufficient and Powerful they don’t need anything! not even social aid! or protection! or love! or mental health support! let me be clear, this trope is not fun for us, it’s not a positive, it’s a burden that allows society to justify not protecting black women.

“this seems kind of forced/crowbarred in to me.” maybe, but also, in the episode, they really just said 'hi' to one another. now if sam had caught them making out on the boat two seconds after they met, that would have raised my eyebrows, but they just said 'hi'. some people are interpreting that as flirtatious - i'm one of them. but again, using words like 'crowbar' and 'force' or 'shove' make it seem like bucky's attraction to sarah is irrational.

now, here’s what i’m not saying. i’m not threatening you to ship bucky and sarah Or Else. you don't have to. i do. i think it’s fun! but that’s my choice. you don’t have to make that choice. you could be shipping someone else with either sarah or bucky and you don't want something to get in the way of that, i get it. i'm also not saying that sarah needs bucky's validation to be considered beautiful, far from it. what i’m saying is it’s worth it to evaluate the ways that implicit racism is affecting and influencing your responses to interracial relationships with black people, and especially black women in the media. because even if you might not see it, there are those of us who can. why can't the prospect of a white man flirting with a dark skinned black women be taken at face value? maybe sit with that.

sources for further reading the roots of colorism, or skin tone discrimination the walking dead's new power couple: 'richonne' and fandom racism fanlore breakdown of 'what shipping richonne taught me about racism' black women and the thin line between strong and angry post on black womanhood and feminism what is featurism? black hair and mental health: a tale of texturism fandom and the intersection of feminism and race "weak black women" by robin thede (for giggles) the take's 'the strong black woman, explained' (yet to watch but the take hasn't failed me yet)

[amphxtrite]

cedric diggory x slytherin fem!reader

warnings: smut, swearing, oral (female receiving), hand job, fingering, riding, kind of dom x dom, spelling/ grammar mistakes.

do not read if you are not comfortable.

summary: Badgers and snakes are born into their rivalry, even in the wild they are practically bred to fight and show their dominance. Cedric and the reader have hated each other from the moment they met. It’s not until Cedric puts his name into the goblet of fire and nearly gets killed that feelings become clear. fluff at the end.

a/n: thank you to @cedricsyellowscarf and nonnie for requesting!

word count: 4.6k

enjoy <3

__________________________________________

When you think of slytherins, what’s the first thing you think of?

Cunning, resourceful, and badass?

Y/n L/n was all the above when you thought of a stereotypical member of the house of black and green, someone who knew what they wanted and would fight with a smirk on her face.

Hufflepuffs on the other hand are thought to be loyal, compassionate, and sweet.

Cedric Diggory fit the description perfectly. The school golden boy with a pretty face and a kind personality.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. But just like in nature, the badger and the snake were born to fight.

When Cedric first met you, a chill went up his spine, everything about you screamed ‘no’ at him and had a scowl resting on his face seconds after just seeing you. Similarly, the hufflepuff gave off a goody-two-shoes aura, someone who couldn’t relax and caved into every demand thrown at them. You didn’t know why, but you had the overwhelming urge to push all this boy’s buttons and drive him insane. Maybe it was the whole ‘strict prefect, and perfect person’ thing going on, but you just wanted to have some fun with him.

You started small. Flirtatious winks, smirks and checking him out when you knew he was looking. The reactions ranged from annoyed to bashful and if you were lucky he grew absolutely seething.

“What the hell are you doing l/n?” He sighs as you brush your arm past him in the hall.

“What Diggory? Am I not good enough to be in your presence?” You scoff, turning to face him. “Listen, I know what you’re trying to do and it won’t work.” The badger snarled.

“Oh Diggory, it already has.” Your smirk, brushing your wand down his jawline and licking the outside of your teeth.

Cedric couldn’t explain what got him so ticked off about you, maybe it was your care-free demeanour; someone who could get whatever she wanted with a snap of her fingers. He’d seen you in between classes, people fawning over you or begging for your forgiveness, only to be met by your stoic face. Your whole being betrayed every instinct and belief Cedric held, and the voice in his head begged to attack.

And so the battle between the badger and the snake continued, you pushed the badger’s buttons, challenging him and egging him on to snap.

“I’m not going to ask again l/n.” The brunette seethed, taking hold of your arm and pulling you back towards him after your fingers brush his back. “Ask what?” You cock your eyebrow with a grin.

“Did the pretty boy finally lose his composure?” Your grin turns malicious and Cedric pushes you against the wall. “In your dreams l/n.”

“Oh indeed you do.”

The two of you were natural born rivals, coexisting to keep the other on their toes and keep natural instincts alive. Both sides are stubborn, unwilling to let the other win. It was destined that one of you would though, these things don’t just end in draws.

As you ‘flirted’ relentlessly, Cedric’s only offence was his retaliation. He had a feeling you’d stop if he never reacted, but a piece of Cedric enjoyed the challenge and almost craved the game.

When the badger put his name into the goblet of fire you almost scoffed. Maybe you had done it, driven him off the edge and caused him to go insane. But as the boy clad in black and yellow turned to reveal a smile, you nearly choked on your pumpkin juice. How on Earth was this fool smiling at the fact he could’ve just signed himself up for a public, gruesome death.

It may be hard to believe, but even snakes can become ‘compassionate’ when it comes to things they are close too, and while you couldn’t call what you and Cedric had, a compassionate situation, a sense of worry and dread overtook your senses.

“Hey is your head in the right space?” You fall into step with the badger and place your hand onto his forehead to check if the boy was sick.

“What is your problem?” Cedric flinches back, confusion flashing onto his face as soon as your hand comes into contact with him.

“Oh I’m just checking you haven’t lost your mind Diggory.” You roll your eyes and flash a sickly sweet smile.

“It’s none of your business what I choose to do l/n, now leave me alone.” The brunette’s face remains firm.

“As you wish, your majesty.” You smirk and fall back to head to your friends.

Despite the internal fight the hufflepuff couldn’t help but almost feel sorry for the way he reacted to your gesture. It was the first time you’d shown any type of kindness towards him. And while rather strange, he knew he shouldn’t have let his aggressiveness win over his true personality.

The badger never found his voice to apologize though, and the rivalry proceeded. You wiped any trace of worry from your face and continued your mission of driving the golden boy crazy. Only thing that was different was the way Cedric reacted. When you first began your flirtatious mission, Cedric grew angry and annoyed at your attempt to gain his attention. He knew you were trying to distract him and he let it get to him.

The silver-eyed hufflepuff started to look forward to your pestering, your flirting was the only fun he got after his name was pulled from the goblet. His schedule became jam packed with training, classes and pity parties from every student who made eye-contact with him. He was happy to see that something hadn’t changed.

The first task came and had you holding your breath at each champion’s battle with their dragon. Your mouth dropped open in awe at each unique way of conquering the task, and by the time Cedric stepped up to face the Short-Snout, you were already on the edge of your seat.

Snakes are in no means known for their love, but it is known they can show compassion in subtle ways. Worry blossomed in your stomach as you watched Cedric transfigure the boulder into a dog, he was taking a huge risk using it as a distraction, when the dragon could turn at any moment. Cedric managed to grab the egg moments before the dragon lost interest in the labrador, and a weight seemed to lift from your shoulders and a small smile shone through as you joined in on the applause.

The second task arrived and the four champions dive into the water in search of their treasure. Cedric surfaced first with the girl who attended the ball with him, ensuring his spot in first. Krum was next with Hermione, Harry coming in last, but with Fleur’s person along with his.

Cedric was rather confused to see Cho at the bottom of the lake. The egg stated the treasure was the thing they missed the most, so the professors must have gotten the wrong idea when Cedric showed up at the dance with the ravenclaw, she’d simply been kind enough to be there as support because Cedric had no one else to attend with.

By the third task, the entire wizarding world was biting their nails at the anticipation of the triwizard tournament. Sitting in the bleachers in front of the massive maze, it made you uneasy you may have to sit through one of these champion’s screams, injuries or even death.

“Tied In first place we have Cedric Diggory and Harry Potter. They will enter first, shortly followed by Viktor Krum and Fleur Delacour.”

At the sound of the flare, the hufflepuff and gryffindor cautiously make their way into the green maze, choosing each step with caution and wands clutched tightly in their hands, until all that was seen was the walls of the hedge.

Cedric had endured a lot through the triwizard tournament and he was not going to give that up for anything. When he spotted Harry close by the cup, his aggressive side took over and he tried to beat the boy who lived. When Harry actually ended up saving his life, he knew there was no way he could take this victory.

The two of them touched the cup and suddenly the world morphed and they were transported to a graveyard. “A… Portkey.”

A short man enters their vision as Cedric’s weakened frame points his wand towards the intruder. “Petrificus Totalus!” The unknown man shouts as Cedric’s body seizes and he falls flat on his face, his body ignoring his constant attempts at moving to help Harry, he can only listen to everything happening as he lays uselessly against the ground.

“Cedric! Get up, we need to go now!” Harry’s frantic voice calls as He pushes Voldemort and his death eaters back. The binding pressure is suddenly released and the hufflepuff immediately jumps to his feet. He runs to the portkey, throwing back any death eaters getting too close to Harry before grabbing his hand and taking hold of the triwizard cup.

The two boys are transported back into the maze, but they waste no time rushing out and grabbing hold of the first people they see. “V-Voldemort’s back!” Harry screams, followed by Cedric’s own voice. Looks of confusion flash on everyone in the audience's face, but as the champions break down they have no way to deny it, something terrible was coming to Hogwarts.

Amos Diggory makes a beeline for his son while Harry is dragged away by professor Moody. Cedric is gasping for breath and searching around for something, someone, to keep him sane. When your eyes meet Cedric’s eyes flash in hope and he begins to limp in your direction, stumbling and falling often, but not leaving his path despite his father’s grasp. You stand to question the hufflepuff, but he simply collapses into your arms.

“I-I’m so sorry for how I t-treated you. I shouldn’t have let m-my feelings define you, a-and I hate that I despised you for n-no reason.” Cedric begins to cry in fear he could’ve died without finally getting his apology off his chest. He wraps you tightly in his arms and his breathing grows rapid. “P-Please forgive me.” He manages in between breaths and your emotionless barrier falls. “Deep breaths Diggory, you’re going to pass out if you keep this up.” You caress the boy’s back in a soothing manner, but Cedric’s murmuring only rapidly increases, and you were beginning to feel a headache. “Hey, it's alright! I forgive you.”

His muttering continues.

“Ced, please you’re bleeding, let’s go get help.”

No use.

As a final resort you gently lift Cedric’s face from the crook of your neck; tears are streaming down his face and apologies continue to flood your ears.

“Save your breath Diggory.” You smirk, pressing your lips to Cedric’s scabbed pink ones.

Your lips are still as Cedric registers your movement, his eyes widen, but slowly close as your smooth lips pull him into a daze. The slight taste of blood is forgotten as Cedric stands and cups his hands around your face, tilting his face to deepen the kiss and slip his tongue into your mouth. As he familiarizes himself with your taste a low groan emits from the back of the champion’s throat and he pulls away to look at you.

In nature, badgers and snakes are natural born enemies, but when Cedric looked into your eyes, the badger lost its temper and the snake became calm. In the Hogwarts walls the snake and the badger felt something new bubble inside them, and the statement ‘opposites attract’ finally began to make sense. Two people, so different, yet so drawn to each other. Finally giving in to their feelings, with primal instincts still flooding their senses.

“You shouldn’t have done that, once I start, I might not be able to stop.” Cedric’s voice grows low in arousal and he leans his face closer to yours.

“Then don’t stop Diggory, take me.”

Cedric immediately takes your hand in a firm grip and walks you down the bleachers, promising his father to go to the hospital wing, but entering the quidditch pitch’s change room instead.“I-I need you y/n. Fuck, you’ve made me want you for so damn long.” He moans desperately, pushing you against the stone wall and placing his hands wherever he could. You trail your fingers down the hufflepuff’s torso and nibble on his lower lip. Cedric’s hips jolt and you’re met with a sudden pressure on your lower abdomen.

“Someone’s excited.” You smirk, reaching your hand down the brunette’s trousers to take his length into your hand.

Your eyebrows raise at the champion’s size, but you don’t let it shine through as your tease your hand against him, brushing past his tip before using his precum as lubricant to move against him.

When Cedric’s face contorted into a look of pure pleasure and lust, you were sure that this was the reaction you’d wanted from Cedric from the start. Lip in between his teeth and eyes shut tight as he bites back moans and lightly tugs on your hair.

You move your hand faster, smirking in pride as loud whimpers begin to exit beautifully from Cedric’s lips and he begins rocking himself against your palm.

“You like it when I use my hand Diggory?” You tease, applying even more pressure to his aching cock as he began to twitch in your grasp.

“Oh fuck yes y/n, just like that.” The hufflepuff’s rough hands move down from your hair to grasp your face and connect your lips again, drowning out the sound of pure ecstasy leaving his mouth with each thrust of your hand.

“You better be quiet Diggory, or people will know how much of a naughty boy you are.” You whisper in a low voice.

“I’d watch your mouth if I was you.”

Cedric removes your hand from his pants and pushes you on to a wide bench, holding you down so you can’t move.

“Now it’s my turn to make you writhe.” He growls with a devilish grin, pressing open mouth kisses against your neck and sucking on the sensitive skin as he works off your skirt.

Your head falls to the side as Cedric finds your weak spot, a mewl signaling him to go harder. His hands pull down the zipper on your back and he carefully pulls it down as your intoxicating whimpers egg him further on.

“Well princess, I guess you got what you wanted.” Cedric smirks, dropping to his knees in front of you and throwing your skirt to the side.

“You’re driving me absolutely insane.”

Euphoria flows through every single nerve in your body when Cedric presses his rough fingers against your clit, the only thing separating you and pure bliss being a thin piece of fabric. Cedric uses the cloth of your panties as extra friction, slowly circling his fingers around as your back arches and your breath grows irregular. Leaning forwards, he takes the lace of your undergarment between his teeth and pulls it down your thighs, swiftly prying your legs apart as soon as your panties drop to your feet and pass your ankles. “Now be a good girl and keep these open, alright?” Cedric mutters, in a dark voice as he descends.

The hufflepuff tests the waters by licking a stripe up your core, hiding a cheeky grin at the sound of your choked moan and continuing to lap at your slick folds.

Your vision fills with dots and your mind is deprived of any thought, your only feeling was Cedric’s strong tongue flicking around and dipping in and out of your slit.

“So wet for me love?” He groans deeply, the taste of your heat, causing his arousal to grow exponentially. Your only response is the incoherent moans and curses stringing past your lips as your back arches and your body pulses in bliss.

As your hips start to buck and your legs close against his face, Cedric uses one hand to press your abdomen down and using his arm and other hand he pushes your legs apart again, your moans fueling his strength. When the brunette adds his fingers into the array, your hands move from your clothed breasts to Cedric’s soft brown hair. A sudden rush of pleasure has your grip tightening in the champions curls, and a loud curse echoes through the empty room.

“You like it when I pull your hair like that Diggory?” You tease through the pulsing in your body. “Fuck, do that again y/n.” His deep growl responds as his fingers quicken and hit deeper inside your tight walls.

With each tight grip in Cedric’s curls, a loud moan was heard in response as he thrusts his fingers deeper and sucks harder, letting his moans vibrate through to your clit to fill your lower stomach with butterflies.

“I-I’m gonna cum!” You whimper loudly.

“You can cum if you beg.” The hufflepuff purrs with one last roll of his tongue, pausing his fingers, still deep inside of you. Every ounce of your dignity is shredded as the pleasure of Cedric’s mouth and fingers stop.

“Please Diggory, let me cum.” You mewl in desperation, but he doesn’t move.

“Try again love.” He smirks in amusement.

“Please Cedric, you make me feel so good! I’m so fucking close, I need to cum.” You moan in frustration, grinding your hips frantically for any friction. Cedric chuckles darkly, pulling his fingers out almost fully before slamming right back into you.

“Merlin, you say my name so perfectly darling.” The brunette grins, pulling his finger out and slamming back again.

“Say it again.” Cedric commands, attaching his lips to your clit, his fingers now ramming in and out of you.

“Cedric! Oh fuck!” your choked voice almost comes out as a sob, and your incoherent moans mix deliciously with your lover’s name.

With the combined stimulation of Cedric’s rough fingers and strong tongue, a coil snaps as your body seems to lose control. Writhing, pulsing, and gripping Cedric’s hair as you pant for breath.

Cedric pauses the assault with his tongue, but continues using his fingers to help ride out your high.

When the shockwaves finally stop and you’re able to open your eyes again, Cedric is leaning directly above you, a grin plastered on his face. “You’re so beautiful when you cum.” The hufflepuff begins kissing down your neck as his hands move down his torso and pulls his shirt up his chest. Cedric pauses to wince as cuts reopen and the fabric irritates his bruises, but when you sit up to help him, he pushes you down again. “I’m fine, It’s just a couple scratches.” He smirks looking back down at you, but you’ve regained your senses and have pushed the toned champion back onto the bench and climbed onto his lap.

“Are you sure? You looked pretty banged up.” your voice comes out as a soft whisper as you begin to press butterfly kisses to his bruises.

“Yes, f-fuck y/n.” He groans as you suddenly bite down on his shoulder, sucking on it for a couple seconds until you’re sure a hickey will form.

“Good, because it’s my turn now.”

You lift your hips from his lap to tug his shorts down and he lifts his bottom up to help you. As soon as they’re off you begin to unbutton your blouse, shrugging it off before leaning forwards and running a finger down Cedric’s abdomen. “Help me?” You smirk, standing and brushing your hair aside to reveal your bra strap. Cedric obliges with shaky fingers as his cock grows harder and begins twitching. Once it comes loose, you turn and connect lips with Cedric’s again, moving your hand to the back of the brunette’s head to run your hands through his hair and cup his jaw. Cedric takes your hips into his hands and slowly brings you towards him again. You shuffle onto Cedric’s lap again, hovering just above his cock as he rubs the sides of your body.

Without warning you sink onto him, relaxing your walls to take all of Cedric’s length. His grip on your waist tightens as you wrap around him. Strings of curses leave his mouth as his head falls onto your shoulder and he nips at the sensitive skin. When you’re halfway down, he moves his hands from your hips to your breasts, massaging them roughly and peppering kisses all over. With the Help of Cedric’s wandering hands and caring mouth, you bottom out and adjust to the feeling of being full. Your hands dig into Cedric’s shoulder blades and you begin moving up and down. It’s slow at first, you aren’t quite sure how to do it, but the hufflepuff uses his hands on your hips to guide you and soon you’re bouncing up and down, the grip on your side and the waves of euphoria from Cedric’s cock pushing you further than you could have ever thought possible.

“You feel so good darling.” Cedric sighs, his eyes squeezed shut and mouth wide open as your walls wrap tighter against him with each bounce. You don’t respond, your thoughts occupied with keeping the euphoric feeling coming. Using Cedric’s broad shoulders you begin to pick up the pace, sucking dark marks into existence on his chest, panting breathy moans into his ear and tightening your grip around his shaft to earn you that desperate moan that made you dizzy.

With the overstimulation from your voice and love bites Cedric could feel his release coming, but he wasn’t ready to end this just yet, with the last couple bounces he summoned as much strength as he could to lift you from his lap and release onto your abdomen. It took everything in him not to drop you or collapse right there, but he managed, setting you back down on the wide bench to push you back and tilt your chin up to meet eye to eye.

“Don’t t-think I’m done with you yet princess.” He growls.

The lustful look in your eyes as your pupils dilated and your mouth hung open had him hard all over again and before you could reply with something witty, he pounded right back into you.

Your head is thrown back at the new angle Cedric is fucking you in, your back arches so he can move deeper and your legs swing up to wrap around his torso, bringing him impossibly close to you. Cedric responds with vigorous thrusts, desperate for you to submit to him and end this with him on top. While he desperately rolls his hips into yours, you pull his head down and reconnect your lips, using your tongue to explore his mouth as you swallow the breathy moans of the grey eyed hufflepuff. Your teeth clash, lips mold and tongues dance as Cedric fucks you senseless.

“Oh fuck Cedric right there!” You cry, rolling your hips up to meet the champion’s needy thrusts and allowing your moans to fill the empty air. Skin hitting skin is the only sound other than your moans and cries mixing together, intimately connecting and reconnecting over and over as wave after wave of pleasure and euphoria floods your veins and every corner of your body. Your eyes roll back and your toes curl with each movement of Cedric’s hips and with his arms pinned above your head and his low groans right in front of your face you could not contain the knot that was forming in your abdomen. Your nails rake down Cedric’s back and bury themselves into his hair as you grin victoriously at the loud profanities spilling through his gritted teeth. With each pump of his length the knot grows tighter and tighter, Pleasure is swapped with pure bliss and Cedric can feel it too as his thrusts grow sloppy and your core tightens against him. He lets himself go, and you follow right behind him. The proof of your pleasures stream between the two of you, down your legs and in between where you are still connected.

Cedric helps you ride out your high as you run your shaky finger up and down his chest, a smile growing on your face as Cedric finally opens his eyes and looks back down at your tired form, panting and grinning back down at you.

“I win.” He smirks, lazily pulling out of you and resting himself on his elbows.

“In your dreams Diggory.” You roll your eyes and move some hair out of the boy’s face.

“Oh are we back on the last name basis?” Cedric chuckles, cupping your cheek and using his thumb to circle your cheek.

“Only if you want Ced.” You sigh, tilting your head closer to Cedric’s warm palm.

“Well in that case, you better get used to calling me Cedric, y/n.” The hufflepuff beams, sitting up and pulling you onto his lap.

Your eyes widen and you begin to laugh joyously as you connect your lips to Cedric’s again, mumbling sweet nothings in between each peck. You stay like that for a second, in each other’s arms, relishing the feeling of finally being complete and content, but as you press your hand to Cedric’s chest he winces and you know the moment has to end.

“Alright lover boy, it’s time to get you to the hospital wing.” You sigh, pecking Cedric’s lips once more before grabbing your wand and quickly cleaning off the mess in between you and Cedric’s legs. “Do I have too?” Cedric groans, pulling you back to him, as you clasp your bra on. “I’m sure I’ll be fine just sitting here in your arms.” He states staring lovingly into your eyes. “Sorry Ced, but even I don’t know a lot of healing spells and by the look of it you’re gonna need them.” You giggle, standing on shaky legs as you pick up your blouse and skirts again.

“Get changed Ced, I’ll meet you outside.” You smirk, slowly making your way out of the room with a slight swing in your hips.

Taking a deep breath of the night air, you take a moment to really take in what just happened. You thought you hated that boy, but maybe that was just for show. Maybe you’d always had feelings for the boy with the yellow scarf and you had been too naive to realize it. It felt strange how the part of your brain that convinced you to fight was now telling you this was right, but you were fine with it, your whole perspective had changed of this boy from the moment he came limping to you in the stadium.

Cedric had similar thoughts as he tugged on his shirt and pants. He finally realized the feeling he got when you looked at him wasn’t annoyance, it was a crush. A fancy that he wanted so badly to deny, but embrace at the same time, and now he could.

As he finally walked out to you and wrapped you in his arms, you knew it was right and you were where you are meant to be. As you interlocked hands with the grey eyed hufflepuff, making your way towards the castle and your new life. Something was made crystal clear.

Badgers and snakes are natural born enemies, made to fight and hate each other. But you and Cedric aren’t the animals you are associated with,

you’re humans and you had the choice to decide how you would treat your opposite.

And although the two of you were clear descriptions of the houses you were assigned, your personalities molded perfectly.

As Cedric lay in the hospital bed, Madam Pomfrey healing his wounds, you stuck by his side and held his hand, knowing the snake would never define you. The badger would never define Cedric. You were your own people, and you were in love.

[suite43]

this was a commissioned peice of writing for @princemai . If you're interested in a commission, dm me!

Adjusting to life after the war was never going to be easy. How do you coexist with the people who've been trying to kill you for millions of years? It didn't take a nihilist to think that the peace wouldn't last.

Bumblebee counted himself pleasantly surprised that, well, something seemed to last. Peace wasn't the right word, but at least it was less "endlessely killing each other" and more "the entire universe hates us and we can't really blame them". But for the most part, these days, things were peaceful.

That didn't mean it was easy.

You wouldn't call it easy to wake up next to the closest thing you'd ever had to an arch-nemisis wrapped around you. You wouldn't quite know what to do with the fact that as much as he hates to admit it, he's afraid of the dark. And you wouldn't blame yourself for waking up sometimes afraid that you'll find a knife at your throat.

It wasn't easy. But it was peaceful, more or less. Because when Starscream kissed him in that way he did almost every morning, gentle and still half-asleep, Bumblebee could nearly forget he'd ever thought of the mech next to him as dangerous, and a part of him would wonder why it hadn't always been like this.

But then they get up, and the day would go on, and even though there's peace now, there's a lot of history, and Bumblebee can't help but feel like they're both just waiting for everything to turn sideways.

Bumblebee wants to trust Starscream. And he does, on some level at least. Immensely so. Enough to have trusted him with the fate of the universe. But every argument, every time the banter hits just a little bit too close to home, every time Starscream slips back into a crueler, more violent version of himself, Bumblebee wonders to himself if maybe this is it. After all, it wasn't really that long ago that they were shooting at each other.

Starscream has the same thoughts. Obviously, he won't admit it, but it's easy enough to see through his acts once you know him well enough - When did Bumblebee start to know him well enough? How the hell did that happen? It all feels so fast - But sometimes when there's a certain tension in his wings and his fingers curl up ever so slightly and his eyes shoot around, planning his escape, Bumblebee knows that Starscream is just as scared as he is.

It's not always like that. There are moments when they're alone where it feels like none of that matters. They sit together on their couch and they're quiet as they both do their own thing, and Bumblebee shifts to lean against Starscream's shoulder and Starscream wraps one arm around him, his hand idly tracing small circles on Bumblebee's plating, and it just feels right. Bumblebee feels more safe there than anywhere in the universe, curled into the side of one of the most dangerous people in the universe. In a moment like that, he'd tear his spark out and put it in Starscream's hands if he asked him to.

But... It wasn't that long ago that he watched people he loved die at those hands. Those same strong, clever hands that slotted perfectly into his like they were built that way, like everything in their lives had led them to this specific touch. Bumblebee wasn't a big believer in destiny but sometimes everything would line up just so, and if he'd been slightly more of a romantic he'd've called them soulmates.

It was this confusing blend of love and hate, of forgiveness and grudge and grief and adoration that didn't make sense at all and yet when Starscream knows exactly what to order him when they go out it makes perfect sense. And, somehow, it works out.

They've never really talked about... well, whatever this is. It's clearly a relationship, at this point. It's hard to argue for 'just friends' after that many rounds of... well, you know what. It's equally as hard after catching each other after god-knows-how-many nightmares, after thousands of late-late-night conversations, after the way that making each other laugh became the easiest thing in the world, after the way that they would whisper sweet complements between each other like a secret because it was far too embarrasing to say loudly.

So yeah, it was a relationship. But "open, honest communication" was not exactly in Starscream's skillset, and, well, Bee wasn't really sure he wanted to talk about it either. Putting a name on it felt. Dangerous. Like it'd ruin it. There'd be too much pressure, too much commitment, too much... truth. It felt like confessing something that he wasn't ready for.

It was one thing to sleep with Starscream. It was another to, say, kiss Starscream. It was a third thing to literally sleep with Starscream, to trust the second-least-trustworthy person on Cybertron to be with him at his most vulnerable. But to be dating Starscream? To introduce Starscream as his partner? As his conjunx? That was a world of different things that Bumblebee was absolutely not prepared to handle.

What was he supposed to say? Oh, by the way, this is my conjunx. He's killed more people than my brain can even comprehend, but he also saved the universe that one time so it's totally cool now, don't worry!

But he loved him, and that was the problem. He loved Starscream so much, and he wanted everyone in the universe to know about the funny, thoughtful, brilliant person that he loved with all his heart.

And didn't it mean something that Bumblebee had seen Starscream at his absolute worst, and still decided that loving him was worthwhile? It wasn't like Bee was just flailing at the whims of his emotions, he chose to be here. Well, not the first time, that had just kind of happened. But after that, he'd chosen to stay, because loving him seemed worth the trouble of hating him, right? And Starscream was getting better, and that was a good thing.

And who was he worried about knowing? The handful of people Bumblebee would've bothered to tell if they did get married already knew the situation, and it wasn't exactly like either of them were really public figures anymore. The government job Windblade had gotten to keep Starscream busy was mostly just paperwork, and aside from the odd job here or there Bumblebee didn't do much. He'd basically retired. So they weren't going to be the talk of the town or anything. Besides, it's kind of old news, there'd been rumors of them doing something together pretty much since the second the war ended. It wasn't true then, but by now the scandal had kinda worn off and it was more of a "yeah, no shit" kind of gossip.

Still. A decade or so of closeness didn't really feel like long enough for a lifetime commitment, especially after what, four million years of hating each other beforehand?

But... Life is shorter than you expect it to be, right? They'd both died once over the course of this whatever-it-was. And the second time, they really had thought it'd stick, and Starscream sorta-haunting him from another dimension or whatever seemed like it was a permanent commitment, and that didn't scare Bumblebee at all. It sounded nice, not having to be alone again. This was like that, except he could be alone, sometimes, because neither of them could walk through walls or locked doors anymore so all he had to do for some privacy was tell Starscream to politely fuck off for a bit, which was a plus, right? Way more pracitcal.

"Can't we talk about this in the morning?" Starscream complained, eyes half shut, snapping Bumblebee out of his train of thought.

"What?" Bumblebee asked, confused.

"I don't want you to propose while we're drunk and you're rambling, idiot," Starscream was laying in Bee's lap, nuzzling his face into Bee's stomach plating. They were holding hands. When did that happen? "We can talk about it later."

Oh, shit.

"How much of that did I say out loud?"

"I dunno, you talk a lot. You're keeping me up."

"Shit. Sorry."

"S'okay. Your voice is nice."

"Oh." It was quiet for a minute.

"It's okay if you hate me. I get it," Starscream said.

"I don't hate you," Bee responded, blinking a few times, trying to shake off the feeling of spinning. "I like it when you're here."

"But you kind of have to hate somebody a little to love them, right?" Starscream shifted, staring up at the ceiling, head still resting on Bee's stomach. "I mean, it's hard to be with someone all the time.  Especially when you're stubborn and stupid, and you do stupid obnoxious things and I hate it. But if you weren't those things I hate, you wouldn't entirely be you. And I don't just like parts of you, I like you, and I can hate things you do while still knowing that it's you, and I love who you are. Even when we piss each other off. It's still you. Right?"

"Do you think i'm stupid? I'm not stupid."

"You're missing the point."

"Oh. Sorry."

"Stop apologizing so much. I hate it when you apologize." Starscream's hand squeezed his a little tighter.

"Oh... uh. sorry."

"You make me feel... like..." Starscream just kind of trailed off.

"Yeah, I know. you too... uh. I mean. you make me. uh. you know."

"Yeah, I know."

"This is good, right?"

"Mmm, it's gonna feel shitty in the morning, but right now it's good."

"What about after tommorow?"

"I don't know. Ask me then."

"Hm."

"I don't have a plan, Bee. That's not normal for me. But I don't need you to tell me it's going to be like this forever, because it probably won't be. Things don't work out like that for us. But right now, for the first time in my entire life, I'm genuinely satisfied. Can we just enjoy that? I don't know how to be happy, Bee. I don't know how to handle it. But I'm trying to make this work. We can go back to shooting each other tommorow if that's easier for you, but right now, I'm happy."

"Yeah? Yeah. Me too. God, I'm happy," Bumblebee pulled their joined hands up, pressing a kiss to Starscream's knuckles where they intersected. "I'm happy that you're happy. I want you to be happy."

"I know," Starscream said. He muttered something else, but it was quiet and slurred and Bee couldn't quite make it out. In his head, Bee imagined it was something along the lines of I love you.

[rainbowsky]

I feel like it would be better if everyone could just concentrate more on the projects GGDD are bringing out ( SDC and OOL for example) and less on political issues that's out of our hands. More of that positive engagement is what we need

If you prefer to look away from politics that is your right, but that's not something you have the right to ask of others. Especially considering that I tag every political post that I make, so there's no excuse for people seeing things they don't want to see (if you want to avoid political posts from my blog you can filter the "your political disengagement is a weapon against you" tag).

You have created a false dichotomy here anyway, because people are focusing on both. People are enjoying and loving GG and DD and their projects, while reflecting on politics surrounding them.

I believe personally that in order to have a truly balanced and healthy perspective on GGDD one must do both. However, not everybody is up for that emotionally or psychologically, and that's totally fine too.

I'm going to go over some points that I made about this topic a while back. This is a slightly revised version of what I've said in the past. I hope after reading this, Anon, you can understand why I don't find the approach you've proposed acceptable.

“BXG should stay away from politics”

While I understand some people get involved in fandom strictly for the enjoyment and escape, I don’t think it’s appropriate for those people to try to dictate how others approach things. As a politically-minded person, the idea of ‘staying away from politics’ - especially the idea of pressuring others to stay away from politics - goes against some of my most deeply held values.

There are also some fairly glaring problems with the idea that BXG should stay out of political discussions.

1] Making it socially unacceptable to care about politics is a means of ensuring people remain uninvested in what happens in the world.

‘Politics’ is a word that is often used to emotionally distance people from things that directly impact them. Labeling social issues as ‘politics’ and then making 'politics’ a dirty word is a psychologically manipulative practice that frames important, life-changing issues as tedious, negative and inappropriate pursuits. People might as well be saying, “Don’t trouble yourself with how the world is run, with how people treat each other, with what you’re allowed to do, say or think, with who is in charge of things or what decisions and actions they impose upon others.”

How convenient for the powers-that-be. How convenient for the status quo. A population that has a distaste for 'politics’ has a distaste for concerning themselves with their own interests. A population that has a distaste for politics will not only avoid thinking about how things are run, they will dissuade - often vociferously - other people from thinking or talking about those things as well.

When you make it socially unacceptable to think about issues that matter, you ensure that the people will never really question what’s happening, or demand change. You will ensure that people do not inform themselves or reflect on and develop their own ideas and values. You will ensure that people who try to stand up for themselves in a broader way will have little support, and will face bullying and stigmatization for their efforts.

2] Disinterest in politics reflects a level of privilege a lot of people don’t have.

When an issue of injustice comes up and someone’s response is, “I don’t want to talk about politics,” or “Let’s try to stay away from politics” in a very real way the message they are communicating to others is, “Whatever is happening to those people, I don’t care. My conversational discomfort in this moment is more important than the injustices those people are dealing with.”

The fact is, our actions and choices are inherently political. They reflect and often reinforce the sociopolitical structures we live within. The purchasing decisions we make, the media we consume, the ideas and policies we legitimize via our behavior - all of these things are political whether we know it or not.

The big difference between thinking of ourselves as political and thinking of ourselves as not political is that apolitical people are able to move through sociopolitical structures completely unconsciously, while others don’t have that luxury. Poor people, racialized people, immigrants, targeted minorities - none of these people have the luxury of ‘not caring about politics’. Their lives often depend on being deeply invested in what happens in the public and private sphere.

If you’re able to ‘not be interested’ in politics then you are a fortunate person indeed.

To people faced with injustice and inequality, politics can often be a question of their very right to exist, let alone thrive, in this world.

3] Editing politics out of discussions about GG and DD is a lot like erasing their queerness. It adapts them into a narrative that, while it may feel good for some fans, isn’t real.

It may make some fans more comfortable to edit out the parts of this fandom that are confusing or unsettling, but fans who prefer their perspective to be balanced and based on reality will just have to accept that this fandom will sometimes force us to reflect on things that aren’t so pleasant.

GG and DD are living under an authoritarian regime. They are frequently called upon to perform and present propagandistic ideas and projects. All of this just goes with the territory. If we refuse to explore and understand the political elements surrounding GG and DD we will be missing important context about them and and their lives.

The politics are relevant to the fandom. They are relevant to what we discuss, how and why. They are an inextricable element of GG and DD’s lives, and that necessarily makes them an inextricable element of any meaningful discussion of them and what they do.

4] If you share their propaganda posts and projects, you ARE being political.

I really feel the need to point out this obvious fact, because there appear to be some people who really don’t get it. GG and DD’s propaganda posts and projects are inherently political.

It is hypocritical and unreasonable to spread that propaganda and then tell people not to discuss it.

Having said all of that, there are simple ways to co-exist even if we disagree.

There are a lot of reasons why people participate in fandoms, and not everyone is in a mental or emotional place where they want to be exposed to political discussions, which can be stressful. Fandom can be a form of escapism, and a way to enjoy something light and fluffy without having too look too closely at the cracks in the facade.

That is a perfectly legitimate position to take on things, and people who don’t want to take part should be free to filter those things out of their feeds. Tagging political or stressful posts is a must.

However, what isn’t legitimate is telling other people that they shouldn’t be thinking about it or discussing it, or claiming that it doesn’t belong in the fandom. Respect needs to work both ways, and space needs to be given for people to pursue fandom in the ways that work best for them. 

BXG are a broad category of people with a broad range of interests, motivations and needs. It is possible for all of this diversity to harmoniously coexist, but that means respecting each other and working together. Tagging posts that we know some fans would rather not see is one excellent way of doing this. And that includes tagging posts that contain propaganda messages or projects, which can be offensive or triggering for people who have grown up under authoritarian regimes.

***

I also want to add a personal note here.

There are a lot of troubling things happening right now. A lot of people are feeling unsettled about it. One of the main ways in which people process and come to terms with difficult experiences is through talking about it and exchanging ideas with other people who care. It would be a huge disservice to a lot of fans who are struggling with what's happening to say, "You're not allowed to think or talk about this. Let's focus on other things."

One of the primary purposes of my blog from day one has always been to try to be supportive, particularly of marginalized people or people who are dealing with adversity. I want my blog to always be a place where people can feel safe to talk about the things that are on their mind.

[orlandoblumhouseofguccimane]

I’m gonna say something that a lot of people are probably not gonna like, for different reasons, about the Loki series, but please here me out.

I wanna talk about the dialogue surrounding Loki and Sylvie’s relationship. I’m going to address the principles in which I, personally, think we should handle dialogues with opposing views and try to provide some general insight into how each side processes the dynamic. The most simple and brute way I can put it is, Don’t Tell People What To Do Or How To Feel. This dynamic that we see now is actually not as common as you think and that’s why we see such diverse opinions on Loki and Sylvie’s relationship to each other. Some people see their dynamic romantically, and some see it familial. Each has valid reasons for feeling that way, therein lies the conflict. And no, most people who see their dynamic as romantic are not pro-incest (🤢that’s disgusting). I want to break down the fundamental reasons why people reach the conclusions they do, that may make them reject other peoples opinions on this matter. I can’t speak for everybody but I’m trying to sum up the general opinions I’ve seen.

For the people who see the dynamic romantically and want to see that dynamic portrayed further, the thing that’s getting lost in translation is, it’s processed as a masturbatory natured act. A journey into self love if you will but with a physical manifestation. I feel that if you were to ask the people who want the romance plot, whether they would fuck their clone or not, they’d say yes because of the same reasoning. It’s masturbatory in nature and a representation of self love with a side a ego. On the emotional side, for Loki specifically, his grandeur and ego/vanity, whatever you want to call it, hides someone who is insecure, starved for positive reinforcement, vastly misunderstood, and feels that they have something to prove. Layers and layers of trauma and defense mechanisms. If this was in a romantic connotation, Loki possibly could find some catharsis in having an intimate relationship with someone who understands him truly, isn’t going to pressure him to change, and accept them for who they truly are, which is something Loki has never had, while also coming to truly love and appreciate all that he is, including his vulnerability by seeing those traits represented outside himself and being attracted to those same traits. A ‘I can’t judge your vulnerability so maybe I shouldn’t judge mine’ type perspective. I don’t think it’s hard for the other side to see how people could have an emotional investment in Loki x Sylvie as a couple if what I described the possible emotional catharsis could be, resonates with what they want in their own lives.

Everything I’ve said so far is valid. And can be a beautiful story telling moment if done right. Now onto the next perspective. The people who see their dynamic through a familial lens have a different interpretation of the nature of the Loki identity as individual people. Likening them to siblings and/or twins due to their “shared parentage” and “shared blood”. Also valid. But I must say that most of the conflict comes from this perspective as they are the ones to specifically ask of other people not to ship them. I can understand how someone seeing a dynamic that processes as obviously familial may make that person feel vastly uncomfortable by seeing people ship them. I can liken that feeling to how I felt when I found out people shipped Thorki (🤮). Some people find it the same but if we’re being fair, it is not. Thor and Loki are adopted siblings, no two ways around that. But given the not so black n white nature of the multiverse/variants we cannot unanimously say they (Loki & Sylvie) are definitively siblings. But if you choose (or naturally) see and value this familial dynamic, the story has the opportunity to be just as rich and fulfilling for both Loki and Sylvie in an incredibly beautiful way. I feel that on the emotional side of the people who advocate for the familial bond, the dynamic loki and sylvie share of chaotic energy, playful teasing, sobering discussions while also insulting/jabbing at one another, humor and hostility, reminds them of their own siblings or familial bonds. Which is an incredibly valuable thing that you cannot knock. But even if they don’t have that dynamic personally, my point still stands for that as a fantastic sibling dynamic. Or maybe even just as ‘best friends’.

But as far as trying to tell people their wrong and/or immoral for shipping them and telling people “Don’t” is unfair due to the complex nature of the Loki identity and variant logic that hasn’t fully been unfolded to us yet. Neither side is “right”, it’s simply interpretation. I’ve seen people fail to acknowledge or refuse to acknowledge that not everything has a ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ and different interpretations and opinions, even opposite ones, are equal and can coexist peacefully. Not everything is a grave moral issue. We need to keep the hostile energy for the shit that really matters not fictional shit.

On a personal note: Idgaf I just want lokius, thanks for letting me rant lmao

[nightswithkookmin]

I have watched the photo booth photos coming out this week. And JK and Tae first. I wondered if Jimin and Suga would be next. But it is Hobi and Jin. So perhaps Suga and Jimin tomorrow. Is it just me or does Bighit seem to be Really pushing Suga and Jimin? I do honestly believe Suga and Jimin are close but not romantic. Jimin has never looked thirsty for Suga and he certainly has for JK. Thoughts on wtf is up with Bighit and Ship Agenda?

Please don't get me started on this cos I'm afraid I won't be able to stop myself 😭😭😭

For now I'm busy fighting the stigma

But this too is a weight sitting on my chest!

WHAT THE FUCK AT ALL IS A MANLY MAN!I stand with Harry Styles, Zac Efron and all these men who have come out to speak out against unrealistic male body standards and the toxic masculinity in the entertainment industry as well as everywhere.

What about this look is a "submissive gay man" look. 😒

Straight men and Women get butt stimulated, take fingers and dicks up their asses and ARE SUBMISSIVES TOO. IT'S CALLED SEX. Why do you stigmatize some men for their sexual preference and applaud others for theirs?!

If straight men can be submissives, gay men can be submissives. And if being soft looking makes you look gay then EVERYONE IS GAY.

Just look how ANDROGYNOUS AND BEAUTIFUL AND MANLY Jimin looks even without make up!!!!!!!

Jungkook have said he resembles his father and yet he calls him pretty and charming and sexy! You think Jk is confused by his looks?

Do y'all know how much Tae weighs!!!!!!!

That don't look life a soft weak man to me and he is not buffed up crazy!

And the tuktukker's on the bird app and Yt comments claiming he wants to be Tae...

I can I assure you he does NOT!!!!!!!!!!

This is the most absurd thing I ever heard in all my shipping life!!!!!! Y'all are a piece of work!

I'm gonna have to take this over to Kofi from now because some people out here just lack the range and depth to have nuanced conversations about these things and it makes it so hard to talk about some things.

What makes you think I can't talk about the good bad and complicated aspect of life and culture and beliefs or ships? Why do I have to hate BTS to point out if they say something misogynistic or homophobic or racist or exude toxic masculinity?

Have they themselves not said they have learned the most from Armies who've called them out on certain things like the misogynistic song lyrics, cultural insensitivity and all these other things?

Y'all don't confuse me with the fake woke wannabes and edgy folks out here who just want to make themselves palatable to yall. Y'all do them a disservice when you don't stay honest and real.

Expressing concern over POSSIBLE toxic work environment having a negative impact on a member does not mean I am afraid that member would lose their sexuality or sexual orientation. Jk looks nothing like Jimin but I still think HE IS GAY.

And it's presumptuous to assume that if any member had been in Jimin's position that I wouldn't have expressed the same sentiments.

How many times do we hear women celebrities complain about unrealistic body standards and the pressure to look a certain way in the industry? How many times have Male celebrities complain of the same pressures they feel in conforming to the looks yall praise as 'manly?' How many times have RM not looked at Tae or JK and talked about how he's own body isn't up to par and that he needs to pick up or work harder? How many times have Jk talked about fasting and dieting to lose weight? How many times have he called himself 'fat' and that he needs to do this or that?

Forget that Jimin has talked about eating disorders and nearly working himself to death to look a certain way? Why do y'all do that? Why do yall make it hard for us to dialogue about these things and bond over shared concerns or hold diverse views and bond over that and yet even learn from those diverse views?Why does someone you disagree with gotta be evil, and crazy and anti?

There's nothing wrong if you prefer a buff Jimin. There's nothing wrong if HE prefers that himself. But leave room for us to discuss the whys of it all. Leave room. If you think his work environment does not impact his choices that's fine. But don't come for me for also believing it might be impacting him or he might be succumbing to the pressures of the work place.

You think if JK started saying he wants to lose his body muscles or if Jin or RM said that I won't wonder what is motivating that decision too? It's absurd if the only reason y'all think I have is a nefarious gay agenda.

As for BigHit and the Ships

It's like WHY!!!!!! WHY CAN'T WE HAVE ALL THE SHIPS SAILING AT THE SAME TIME!

Y'all do this ridiculous scheduling and pairing as if they are night nurses running shifts! Why the fuxk can't we have all these ships coexisting wholesomely side by side AT THE SAME DAMN TIME!

This is how the conspiracy theories begin- of Tae kook finally getting back together and putting Jimin in his place. No one is putting no one in no damn place! Tae kook is not real.

I can't. I really can't!

Someone beam me up. I just can't anymore.

I might as well delete my Tumblr and move to Jupiter with BTS.

Signed,

GOLDY

[spencer-reids-adventures]

“here, let me take care of you.”

“Here, let me take care of you.”

"No offense," Blake says warily, "but of all of the people who could be taking care of me right now..."

"None are in the building except for me," Strauss points out.

"I can take care of myself just fine."

"You just fell down the stairs," Strauss says. "For god's sake, let me help you sit down and bring you some ice for your knee. I know you hate me, but just let me do this for you, please."

"I don't hate you," Blake says quietly.

"You don't?" Strauss raises an eyebrow.

"I don't like you very much. I certainly don't like what you did to me last time we worked together. But I don't hate you."

Strauss gets Blake settled on the couch in her office, then disappears and comes back moments later with an ice pack, a glass of water, and some painkillers.

"Thank you," Blake says, swallowing the painkillers and then pulling out her phone.

By some miracle, James is actually in town, and she asks him to come pick her up so she can rest at home.

"I'm sorry, by the way," Strauss says.

"Yes, we've had this conversation already."

"Well, this is me trying to make amends."

"I understand that," Blake says. "Do what you need to do. I'm not going to forget about our whole history just to make you feel better. I'm perfectly happy coexisting here as we have been, but please don't think that one day I'll magically forget what happened, because I won't. Your actions have consequences, and you can't just take back what you did."

"I understand," Strauss says.

Just then, Blake's phone vibrates.

"James is here to get me," she says. "Thank you for your help."

"You're welcome."

Blake stands up and winces as she puts pressure on her injured knee.

"Erin?" she says hesitantly. "Do you think you could help me downstairs?"

"I'd be glad to," Strauss says, and they slowly make their way down.

As she gets into the car, Blake gives her a small smile.

[inkykeiji]

I hope this isn’t a tmi type question but u seem really comfy sharing and I just read ur last ask

but I’m basically here to ask how u have achieved what sounds like such a wonderful sex life w ur boyfriend?

I’ve never been able to find anyone who’s into the same shit as me or found the kinda sex I wanna have, how did u find someone who’s into what u are? Did u both just meet and have complimenting sexual preferences by chance, or did u kinda just trial and error together until u found what u both like?

Bc for me (this might be unrealistic idk) when I meet someone like that I’d want it to be natural, i don’t wanna have to show/teach a guy how to fuck me the way I want, it just takes away a lot of the appeal? Like, I want a guy to do what HE wants and just have that naturally be something that I also love.

I know a lot of people say talking and communicating about ur sexual preferences helps a healthy and good sex life, but that just makes me so uncomfortable and takes away the natural spark of it I feel like.

Thank u in advance! No pressure to answer this if it’s too personal!

hello hello!! <33 beware there is a very LONG answer under the cut hehe <3

i hope you don't mind me answering this publicly!!! <33

AH okay! so, the answer lies in a few things. my boyfriend and i began dating in 9th grade, and we've been together ever since (and we just graduated university together right before covid hit, so that should give u a pretty good idea of just how long we've been together for!) which means we've had a LOT of time to try things out, to explore each other's bodies, to learn what the other likes, etc etc etc. i definitely think that this plays a large role in it, just having spent so much time together and having been together for so long, you know?

for us, we got pretty lucky, because we happened to mostly be into the same kinks. but at the same time, since we're each other's only sex partners and have been having sex since we were teenagers, we got to discover a lot of those kinks together. there are definitely a few we don't share (for example i am definitely more kinky out of the two of us and like, he refuses to do anything with knife play; totally understandable) but for the most part they match up.

I KNOW UR GONNA HATE TO HEAR THIS LMAO but communication does play a very big and important role in it all, especially if you're going to be delving into darker kinks/bdsm, you know? you have a responsibility to properly communicate with your partner what you are and aren't comfortable with, to set hard and soft limits, to come up with a safeword, etc etc etc.

for us, for example, he wasn't quite sure about a daddy kink the first time i brought it up. i never pushed him to do it, but eventually he decided he'd like to give it a try, just to see how it goes, and we agreed that if he wasn't comfortable or into it then it was off the table. like that kind of communication is important within a relationship, you know? i also can't expect him to know exactly what i'm into without vocalizing it to him, right?

we gave it a try, and he learned/discovered it's something he really enjoys!!! so there's a certain level of communication and compromise that's necessary there.

i understand where you're coming from with the whole 'i don't want to have to show/teach him how to fuck me'; that makes sense!!! i can totally see why that would take the appeal away from it, especially if it's during the act itself! usually, for us at least, these conversations happen much earlier than the act itself.

but i think what you're more looking for is someone who's experienced!!! do you know what you're into, or have like a general idea of what you're into? i feel like it's kinda necessary to have this conversation with potential partners in advance, that way they know what you like and what you're cool with etc. (and you know what they like + are cool with) and see how much knowledge they have on your specific kinks and work it all out then and there. i can promise you that, from my experience, this does not in any way take away the spark of anything!!! if anything, it builds anticipation!! and it ensures that the sex itself goes fluidly, fun and safe.

this isn't to say that you're not gonna meet someone who's sexual preferences line up with yours!!!! it's very very possible!!! all of the people i know who have good sex have found partners with preferences that align with their own (but they also did all have those conversations about kinks and limits etc!). i think (and you can totally feel free to correct me if i'm wrong!! this is just how i'm interpreting it!!) what you're more looking for is that intense chemistry and compatibility. and you can have and maintain that intense chemistry and compatibility while also having a conversation and open communication about what you are and aren't into, you know? those things can, and do, coexist!! in my humble opinion, if you're a good match, the natural spark of it all will be there regardless. i've been with my boyfriend for an extremely long time, and we still have that. plus, talking about new things to try in bed is something that always gets us both super excited, and we have a tendency to talk about it after we fuck, too. "how was that? did you like this position? (he improvises positions a LOT lmao) was i too rough?" etc.

waaah i hope this makes sense!!!! i'm obviously not a sex health specialist or professional, and i can only give you my own personal opinion based on my experiences but to sum it up:

any relationship is going to require a bit of trial and error and a lot of trust and communication and honesty. it is more than possible to both experience that feeling of natural and fluid sex AND to discuss your preferences. in my case, we got lucky, because we happened to be into most of the same kinks, but we still did (and do) need to talk about them!!! again, if anything, having those conversations makes the sex BETTER, because it goes smoother with less hiccups!! i hope this helps a little <333

[a-lil-perspective]

I have been silent for some time now. I have refrained from exhibiting any plaguing thoughts that might warrant me the label of “that person”, but I’m at the point where I’ve had my fill.

Ramble under the cut so as to not... offend or inconvenience anyone. There’s absolutely no obligation to read this. It’s Tumblr. You can block/ignore me. The option to do so is readily accessible.

I’ve been a Bad Batch fan since day one. While I didn’t start creating that very same day, it was relatively close. Point being, I’m a long-time dedicated fan. As the premiere to their series draws closer, I feel like there is going to be a great shift, rift here. That being said, I figured now is as good a time as any to make this post.

I love those boys beyond words. They’ve been the one constant in my life amidst a rapid and debilitating change. I love getting to give them life, even if my interpretations aren’t the most accurate.

Yes, I am a new Writer and yes, I am new to Tumblr, as I am sure both of those things are painfully apparent.

I get that it is impossible to please everyone. It’s something I’m learning more and more with each passing day. It’s something that gets harder to swallow, even more so.

I’d like to say that being here has been a largely positive experience, with all of these great connections and opportunities. But honestly? It’s been more isolating than anything. I’ve actually never felt more isolated than since I joined a year ago.

As a content creator or even just a general blogger, I don’t ask for much. I don’t ask for anything, in fact. I consider myself very low maintenance. I don’t demand/harass/play the martyr for reblogs. I have never mentioned it once, and never will. Some people on here are so damn passive-aggressive about it, and quite frankly, it’s embarrassing. It’s very stigmatizing. While I completely understand the frustration surrounding the like-to-reblog ratio, I think it’s neither tasteful nor reputable to threaten to call people out for not reblogging your fics. I wish I could say I was joking on that one. But I’ve seen it profoundly. Not cool.

And yet, no one says anything or raises any concern there.

Yet I make metas, harmless rambles, and I get shot down? Seriously?

—I need to “chill”, it’s “overkill”, I’m “overthinking”. I and my content are apparently just so damn arduous to interact with.

If you don’t like me, please just move on. There are plenty of other Bad Batch creators for you to enjoy. You know that. My work is absolutely not the final say, and I’ve never claimed it to be.

What is so wrong, with sharing one’s thoughts? Why do people inherently have a problem with other’s creative efforts? I see it time over again. Why do I feel like if I was making a bunch of smutty posts it wouldn’t be as much of a problem, that it in fact would be infinitely more welcome? (Absolutely NO shade to people who create smut, okay? I’ve made my own share. I admire those bold enough to do so regularly. I absolutely love them. Please teach me your ways).

This ramble really has nothing to do with the most recent event regarding my contributions. Rather, it’s a culmination of experiences over the past several months that have brewed and festered to the point where I can no longer keep downplaying it.

Social media, at its core, is one big popularity contest. It always has been, it always will be. But I’m not here to win. That’s never been my objective. That’s not what I’m about. Surprise (or not), I am not a popular blog. Not by a long shot. I’ll never claim otherwise.

I don’t ask people to view/interact with my content, I’m not an activist, I can’t even fathom exuding that kind of confidence. Even though I, admittedly, crave it. I suspect I crave interaction as much as the next creator. It’s a nice feeling. Yet there’s never been any obligation for it, especially with me, so I don’t understand what the problem is. As I’ve said, there are ample ways for you to block/avoid me. It’s the internet. In this day and age, there’s no excuse for viewing anything you don’t want to.

I came here in the hopes of finding like-minded individuals, uplifting and interacting, and exercising some otherwise stunted creativity.

All Tumblr as taught me is that creating and contributing is largely a thankless, empty endeavor. You can give and give and give and be reduced to nothing. There’s a profound imbalance between “giving” and “receiving”, and in regards to both ends of the scale, it’s became apparent to me that if you don’t cater heavily and in unreasonable degrees or get “noticed” by a popular blog, you get nothing, and your efforts are null and void.

Truthfully? I constantly feel like I walk on eggshells here, and it’s all I can do to not crack under the pressure, even though it’s my blog and my headspace. I should feel comfortable and free to express myself here, and I don’t, and I’m unsure of how to achieve that sense of stability. To be completely honestly I feel like a constant bother and a nuisance. When I post, I literally feel like there is a collective eye-roll that comes with people receiving a notification from my blog. Even though I know, rationally, that can’t be true, that’s an absurd level of thinking. I can’t say I can pinpoint exactly where it stems from.

But regardless: I hardly ever talk about/create the things I actually want. I only recently just got ballsy enough to share some metas, and we all know how well that’s going. I try not to have smut out of respect for my asexual/minor mutuals, even though the tag to blacklist is very much an option. I try not to bring up conflicting topics, Tumblr, political, or otherwise, even though with proper tagging I could. But I try not to even bring that into existence. Even though it’s my right to, I don’t.

I don’t actually feel like I fit into any narrative here, especially in the Bad Batch fandom; even though we are all basically the same steadfast group of bloggers. We all know who we are. We all coexist in the same space. It’s nearly impossible to be unaware of each other, at this point.

And yet, I’m not in a bunch of Discord servers or backed by a team of beta readers and all that jazz. It’s basically just me talking to myself out here. It’s very isolating.

Part of that—most of it—is my own crippling social anxiety, and the genuine belief that I don’t deserve to be in the same space/servers as all of these brilliant creators. Because I’m just me, and there’s not a whole lot of value there. With that mindset, it’s hard to actually feel like I belong anywhere. I know that is a mindset I have to conquer alone.

My excitement over my creations has largely dwindled into nothing. I seldom ever bounce my ideas off of others—another issue that stems from the fear of presenting as a burden—and even though I try to write for myself, even that fire has pretty much died out. I’m not even sure how or if I could even reignite it, at this point. It’s really quite sad. It makes me very sad, actually. All I wanted was to safely ramble, project all my thoughts and creativity that has otherwise been repressed through prolonged detrimental circumstances.

More than anything, I wanted to find and hold onto something that makes me feel useful, meaningful, happy. More and more I wonder if that’s even possible. I don’t think it is, not here. I often wonder if joining and sharing on Tumblr was a horrible mistake. I miss the innocent joy of when I first started creating. It was so simple. I’m trying to find that simplicity again.

But I’m burned out. I’m running on fumes. I have been for some time.

At this point it goes beyond just “taking a break” from Tumblr. It’s the fact that it all feels like this meaningless, monotonous cycle. I wonder every day if I am an isolated case in experiencing these emotions.

And yet, come tomorrow I will still be here, business as usual.

I’m not asking for sympathy or playing the victim or attacking anyone or trying to guilt-trip into more interaction. I am very aware of my shortcomings and incorrect mindsets. I’m just trying to make sense of it all. I feel very disconnected from everyone here and it’s lonely. This took a lot for me to share. I will most likely delete this because anxiety will eat me up, as it does with everything I post. Yes, everything.