#not gonna delete any posts from this morning
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im-no-jedi · 2 years ago
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managed to get at least a couple hours of sleep. I’m obviously still exhausted and will be for the rest of the day. my poor Hunter doll once again being the MVP and let me just cling him to my face while I slept 🥰
more importantly, woke up to a bunch of nice messages from people. y’all are seriously the best. regardless of my opinion of the show, I’m so freaking grateful for getting to interact with this fandom. I’ve made some really great friends as a result, and just had some lovely interactions with people in general. other than the characters themselves, getting to be in the same space as y’all has been the best part of this 🥺💙
I’m still hurting, and I will be for a while. Idk what my status in the fandom will be going forward. despite what I said this morning, I don’t want to 100% give up on the show yet. I may be upset the show is ending after this season, but I’m willing to give it one last chance at redemption. until then, my main focus will definitely be on MLWTBB and making art. gifs and other “official” content will most likely still be made, but more sporadically. Idek when I’ll be able to make myself rewatch season 2 at this point, so yeah. but my personal content will continue for sure. the story and characters I’ve created for this show are extremely important to me, and I want to share them with others. also, I apparently have to continue to fix things more than I thought I would haha.
as I said before, my inbox is always open and I’d love to continue chatting with y’all. especially if you’re like me and need some reassurance, or just someone to rant to. seriously, I’d love to hear some rants; it’s cathartic for me to read/hear LOL
I’m not giving up. I refuse to give up. if this really is about “hope and redemption” like DBB said, then I’m not letting this fully destroy me. I love these characters way too much for that. and I love this community too. we’re gonna be ok guys 💙💙💙
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way2gosuperrstarr · 2 years ago
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errrrr my take on an mc design { @ˊꈊˋ@ } with a little bit of my own "flair" to it of course (^_−)☆
aand by that i mean just mixing some of my own personal sona design elements into it ! lmaoo so nothing too crazy. just about average
this was fun .....! she's cute as hell i think i love them sm
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i kinda just fucked around and found out with the uniform erm i think it looks. okay.
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stereax · 8 months ago
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woohoo spiraling out of control right now (what else is new really I've been fucked up and spiraling for weeks now) and trying to figure out reasons not to delete my tumblr and discord and myself along the way
but you know. talking about myself on my blog automatically means I'm attention seeking and fishing for pity right? should just shut up and stick to the news eh, it's all I'm good for :D
anyway if you need me I'll be in the corner reliving the past, coming to terms with reality, and trying to convince myself I'm not the problem despite every indication to the contrary ✌︎︎
#sterechats :)#09:58 pm - this is a bad idea but scheduling it anyway#what's the worst that can happen really? everyone leaves again? nobody talks to me again?#probably gonna delete this in the morning so. meh. not like it matters not like I matter :D#10:29 pm - wow it feels like my head is on fire#like my brain is actually burning and I can't do a damn thing about it#I should be happy right now! the devils are winning! my favorite guys are scoring!#but no! I'm barely keeping it together around my family and praying I don't wake up tomorrow <3#11:00 pm - I need to get out of here#I need to get out of here out of here out of here I can't stay here any more this is killing me#everyone hates me and I need to chew my arms open maybe then everything will make sense#why am I even writing these tags what does it matter#I was so much more in control of myself when I was sh-ing#maybe I should get back to that maybe it'll help I don't know anymore#I just want my friends back but they hate me hahahaha#11:24 pm - wonder how many people are gonna block me after this one#how many people will finally be fed up and leave for good#everyone leaves and I should be used to this by now#here's a truck stop instead of saint peter's (yeah yeah yeah yeah)#11:41 pm - it's friday afternoon/there goes antigone to be buried alive#in the next world I want to be something useful/like a staple gun/or in love#I would fall off a cliff for you/a thousand times and call it a good day#maybe I'm just incapable of being human! maybe that's it!#maybe I'm not even human at all... but something worse instead...#1:22 am - moving the posting of this back from 3 to 6 am#not that that matters and not that I matter but I don't think I'll sleep#and I don't want this to post when I'm awake#I know I'm just going to get unfollowed and blocked and left behind as always#because happiness and good things and friendships just aren't things I get to have really#I just wish people would stop lying and telling me they're different and they'll stay when they're not different and won't stay
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immortalmrwavell · 2 months ago
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Mr Wavell Is Back!!
Getting Terminated, My Brand New Account and How Things Will Be Moving Forwards. If you were a fan of my content please stick around and read what I’ve got to say ❤️
So as some of you may have already noticed, my original account MrWavellSwaps was terminated. This was very recent so a lot of you who followed me on there may not have even noticed yet but you can go see for yourselves. Obviously this was not my choice and was completely out of my control and when I found out I was frustrated to say the least. This account that I’d worked on for over 3 years had just been snatched away from me in a way that I personally feel was unfair. Initially I had been censored back in July this year for posting content that Tumblr believed to be against their guidelines. Or at least their automated bots thought so as what I posted that got me the censor was in a grey area at most. But despite that I tried to do right by correcting and even deleting any and all posts Tumblr had flagged even if I didn’t believe they were against guidelines just to play nice. Following which I appealed my account’s censorship only to be met with silence for months on end. That is until September 3rd where I chased up the appeal for the third time after receiving no response or updates. I was hoping to receive a turnover on the censorship but was expecting them to just say no and keep it censored. But they did the one thing I didn’t except
The email I got the next morning could be summed up like this. “You want a response? Okay. You’re terminated. Goodbye.” And I was. I tried going on Tumblr and my account was gone. Great.
I’ll be honest in the past I would’ve said that if something like this ever happened that I’d just give up with writing these stories and move on. But I don’t feel that way anymore. I think I’ve just grown so fond of this community and writing as a whole that I just don’t really want to leave yet. I’ve met so many friends through being a writer on here and even more than that I met my Boyfriend! I never could’ve expected that writing these silly gay TF stories would change my life in the ways that it has. And that said I think I’d be doing a disservice to just give up and throw it all away.
So here I am. Back again with a fresh new account.
Where am I gonna go from here you may ask. Well of course I have a large catalogue of stories already from the past couple of years and the majority of those stories are actually still floating around Tumblr thanks to all the reblogs. So it’s not like they’re gone forever which I’m glad about. However with my old account gone it feels like they’re all scattered apart. No longer together in one place. And most importantly they no longer feel like mine. Of course I still wrote them all but with this new account I no longer have any control or ownership over those posts and honestly that annoys me. Not to mention with them all coming from my terminated account, there will always be the chance that they’ll just end up getting completely wiped from the platform eventually, reblogs included.
With that said, I’ve made the decision to re-upload each and every single one of my stories to this brand new account. This way I’ll have complete ownership of these new posts. I’ll be able to edit and change them as wish and overall I believe it would just look a whole lot cleaner than if I were to just hunt down reblogs of my old stories to reblog again over here. However I genuinely see that as a positive as not only will it be better for me that way but it can also give all of you a chance to rediscover some of my older works that were perhaps buried under so many other before. And to spice things up I might even update a few of my old stories to add extra scenes and new images to go with them!
On that note I’m gonna be trying to adhere to Tumblr’s guidelines as best I can so I don’t give them any reason to pounce on me again. This means no risqué imagery from now on even if I personally believe it’s within guidelines. My writing style will remain the same however if a story is particularly steamy I may add a community label just to be safe. If you wanna learn more about community labels and how to make sure you’re still able to view labelled posts check out this post. All that said I do have a plan in mind to bring you all versions of my stories that have more explicit imagery but more on that in a moment.
For the next couple of weeks at least I plan on gradually re-uploading all of my content to this blog like I said. I may do one story a day or more than that depending on how I decide to do it. I’ll continue doing this until everything is back up under this new blog. Once all that is done I’m going to try and create a new master list where you can find links to all my posts just like before. And once that’s done I might give myself a breather for a few days and then I’ll see about posting some brand new content. Content of which I’ll be writing up while doing the re-uploads so that it’ll be ready to go once everything is caught back up. After that everything should hopefully be back to normal with my usual schedule of posting new stories and reblogging stories I enjoy!
Now. On top of this I also have plans to create a new blog or website completely outside of Tumblr. One that I can be allowed to do anything that please with and not have to tiptoe around any guidelines. This is where I’ll be uploading alternative versions of all my stories. Some of them may be exactly the same as they were on Tumblr while others may have secret images and gifs that otherwise wouldn’t have been allowed on Tumblr. I haven’t decided on all the specifics yet but once I figure it out I’ll let you all know.
And one last thing before I sign off. Recently I’ve been considering the possibility of turning this hobby of mine into a job. Now don’t worry I’d have absolutely no plans to paywall any of my content. I want everything to remain accessible for free. However I was considering opening up a place for people to leave donations and maybe even kick my Patreon off again. But most importantly I’d be considering opening up commissions. If I were to go down this route I’d likely be able to post much more consistent content for you all and make this my full time focus. It’s just an idea for now and I probably won’t set it into motion until early 2025 if I decide to go through with it but I wanted to at least share it with you all. I was actually just about to post about it on my original account until… you know hahahah.
Well I think I’ve said everything I wanted to say. Please can I ask that if you liked my stories that you please share this and my upcoming re-uploads around and let everyone know that this is my new blog. It would help a ton in getting me back on my feet on I’d really really appreciate it.
Can’t wait to get back on track and continue delivering stories to all you wonderful people out there. I love all of you and I’m so grateful to you all for following my journey so far and I hope you’ll all find me again so we can continue this together! ❤️
- Mr Wavell
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vamossainz55 · 1 year ago
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hi, nik! fellow carlos enthusiast here hoping you could write a kiss to shut him up. he’s come home from the gym (post sweaty thirst trap selfie) and is venting about pierre. reader smooches him to stop, reassuring him that he could never do wrong in her eyes 🤫😘
a/n: hi anon, i love love loved writing this. carlos doesn't necessarily vent but reader does smooch him to shut him up. slight jealous carlos, i couldn't help myself sorry. i hope you enjoy <3
(+ insta au at the end w the infamous photo)
let's sweat it out, - cs55
it started as a joke, and it wasn’t meant to be taken as anything beyond that. you didn’t think he’d take it too seriously either as his ‘pobrecito’ comment hinted that the spanish driver hadn’t even taken pierre’s comment to heart. but here you were, watching carlos putting on his shoes on with his back turned towards you.
five years of being together meant you didn’t need to look at carlos’ face to know he’s not in the best mood. you can tell by the way he tightens his shoelaces, the little huff he lets out before he gets up.
“amor,” you say, rolling your eyes when he responds with dime before saying your name. he always did this when he was annoyed, refusing to use any pet name.
“i was joking,” you say for the nth time. you know carlos isn’t upset with you, the frustration of it all probably culminating into him being put into a bad mood. 
“maybe you shouldn’t have squeezed him carlos,” he says, voice high pitched with a scrunch of his nose. you roll your eyes at his childish response, crossing your arms over your chest.
“are you mocking me carlos?” your voice is sharp this time, a warning for him not to push it.
he hears it loud and clear since he instantly turns to look at you. “sorry, i know you were joking.” he murmurs before sighing. “i’m gonna go for a run and workout. i’ll be back in a few. do you mind waiting for a late lunch?” he comes over, resta his knee on the edge of the bed to kiss your forehead. 
“mhm, thought you were sorry.” you murmur but smile small at the offer anyways. his hand gently squeezes your elbow before he pulls away. “okay, i’ll wait for you for lunch.” 
_
you figure lunch will be… interesting. a few minutes after carlos had left you had seen pierre’s instagram story, a replay of when carlos had supposedly squeezed him. 
‘don’t be mad but,’ you had texted him along with a screenshot of the post. it took an hour for him to answer, and what he had sent was one of the last things you had expected to see. 
he replies with a photo and nothing else. you open the chat to see what it exactly is and you feel your cheeks burn red as soon as you see it. 
the photo is… something. you can see the droplets of sweat forming at almost every strand of hair he has. his locks are disheveled, lips parted as if in the midst of panting. your eyes trail to his collarbones, down to his chest and you have to cover your face, suddenly embarassed as your blush travels down your chest. 
before you even muster the courage to reply the notification comes in, carlossainz55 posted on their story. 
you’re bright red when you see the photo appear on your screen again. ‘carlos’ you text, 'what is this!! delete!!!!’. it’s technically not explicit, the caption of it saying gym time but it looks so intimate, reminds you of late nights or early mornings that has you feeling antsy. 
he doesn’t answer though, not after two texts or five, and you end up hiding your phone inside the closet to stop yourself from looking at that photo. he knows how much waiting drives you crazy. 
so he’s not surprised when he gets home to find you in the kitchen, lunch barely started even though he had texted you thirty minutes ago saying he was on the way. 
“you didn’t text me back, lost your phone?” carlos asks, smiling innocently at you when you turn over to look at him.
he’s still wearing his gym clothes, the change of clothes left in the bag he had dropped by the door. the fabric clings onto his body and he doesn’t miss the way you eye him. 
“left it to charge upstairs,” you murmur, red when you realise carlos fully knows your ogling him. 
“oh?” he says before coming closer to you. “but what if you miss one of pierre’s post?” carlos asks, raising his brow. 
“huh?” you ask, almost surprised by his words. carlos shrugs, hooks his fingers into the belt loops of your jeans. he pulls you close, loves the way you move towards him without question.
“maybe he releases another statement hm?” his lips hover over yours. “i mean… i shouldn’t have squeezed him after all. my fault hm,” you lean close to kiss him, already riled up from earlier but he doesn’t let you, leans back. “isn’t that what you said this morning?” 
“carlos,” you whine, the ingredients on the counter well forgotten. 
“you’re so busy with what pierre has to say, giving him all the attention in the world. he must be right hm?” your lips come close again, wanting to interrupt him but he still doesn’t let you.
“everybody knows you didn’t do anything carlos,” you say, antsy for a kiss already. 
“mhm, everybody but my girlfriend.” he says, raising his brow.
that’s exactly the moment you realize what all of this is really about. carlos wasn’t mad at pierre, he was jealous of your attention on him. 
“god, you’re annoying,” you say, and carlos knows you’ve finally gotten it. “i was joking.” 
carlos hums. “are you sure?” 
“yes, carlos.” his hands grip your waist. 
“really sure?”
“carlos,” 
“were you re-“ the words are taken from his lips when you press yourself against him. you cup your face and his hands go to squeeze your waist, lifting you to the counter to let you sit there. he smiles against your lips, lets a soft sigh of satisfaction once you both pull away. 
"you know i'll always back you first right?" you ask, raising your brow and carlos nods, pressing his lips against yours again.
"mhm, i know." he says, pressing kisses to your neck. you let your eyes flutter shut but you're quick to remember the story he had posted earlier, and you have to ask.
“so… the photo?” you question, hands already roaming under his shirt. 
“well, needed to make sure pierre was the last thing on your mind,” he says smugly. “did it work?”
you wait for a moment, watch as carlos tries to kiss you but this time you lean back, making him regret doing the same earlier. he pouts, blinks when you tap his nose with his finger. 
“hmm, i don’t know. maybe.” you say against his lips before kissing him again. 
yourusername
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liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 293,758 others
yourusername dont worry about him guys. i'll let him squeeze me all he wants 😏 🤫 1 hour ago
charles_leclerc: ... oh 😦 54m ago
fan1: who wants to bet it took charles more than ten minutes to get what yn meant 28m ago liked by carlossainz55
fan2: WHY IS NOBODY SAYING ANYTHING ABOUT THE MEME 26m ago
fan1: no bc the mouth froth is so real. 25m ago
carlossainz55: coming home rn 🏃🏻‍♂️ 59m ago
yourusername: you're literally right next to me 57m ago
landonorris: NOT INFRONT OF THE KIDS 40m ago
yourusername: what kids? we're making them rn 20m ago
landonorris: i'm gonna throw up 🤢 18m ago liked by charles_leclerc
fan3: not the carlos sainz apologist 10m ago
fan4: LMAO shes his gf ofc she would be??? 6m ago liked by yourusername
yourusername: carlos apologist first, carlos fucker second 3m ago
fan4: girl i-
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waitingonher · 2 years ago
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dating percy jackson
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pairing: percy jackson x gn! reader
content warning: kissing & couple-ly things
word count: 2,144
author's note: first post on this account!! if any of this sounds familiar, it's cuz i used to have an account but i deleted it cuz i wanted to redo it or smth…LOL 😭😭 but requests are open and i'll be coming out with more original work. enjoy!!
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dating percy jackson would be like dating your best friend who you kiss and cuddle with occasionally.
percy’s not a very high maintenance kind of guy, so dating him would be more chill and relaxed. despite this, he’s still so, so incredibly sweet and cares about you so much.
even if he’s very oblivious sometimes…he’s still a sweetheart! 
he’ll do absolutely everything in his power to ensure that you’re safe and alright.
going on quests with him can lowkey get annoying sometimes because he’s always trying to protect you. 
but don’t get me wrong, he knows for a fact that you can definitely handle yourself, but he’s been through so much and the last thing he wants is you becoming injured or worse!! 
his protectiveness comes from a very genuine place, and you know that, but you sometimes like to tease him about it. 
your boyfriend suspiciously eyes the cave you’re supposed to inspect for your current quest, “y/n…” he pauses, turning to look at you, “are you 100 percent sure you’re gonna be okay all alone in there? i don’t like how quiet everything is.” 
you quirk an eyebrow at him, “percy, you’ve asked me this so many times that now i’m starting to think you’re doubting me and my abilities.” 
his eyes widen as he gives you a look of panic, “wait y/n no, i swear i didn’t mean it like that, i was just-” 
you put your arms around his neck, “babe, i’m teasing. i know you wouldn’t do that,” you say, chuckling at his reaction. 
percy rolls his eyes at you and places his hands on your waist, pulling you in for a kiss, “you’re the worst.” 
“i know,” you respond, laughing at your boyfriend. 
if you’re going on a quest without him though…expect him to be 100x more worried about you.
part of him wants to sneak out of camp to join you, but he knows that you’re more than capable of handling a quest without him.
all he can do is just make sure you’re prepared.
nothing, and i mean nothing will be forgotten as long as you have percy.
the night before you leave, he’ll ask you to sneak over to his cabin so he could spend as much time with you as possible.
percy claims it’ll be “a night full of relaxation before your big quest,” but with the way he’s bombarding you with questions regarding your preparedness, you don’t think you’re going to be in for a very relaxing night.
after taking a sip of your tea, you peer over at your boyfriend who opens his mouth to say something, “okay-” 
“love, if you’re going to ask me if i have everything, then the answer is yes,” you utter, leaning in to fix the crooked sheet mask on his face. 
percy chuckles, “how’d you know that’s what i was gonna say?”
“maybe it’s because you’ve been asking me that ever since i got here.” 
he smiles sheepishly, “oh…right.” 
and when you leave in the morning he’s asking you again if you have everything?? as if your supplies somehow vanished as you guys slept the previous night…
iris messages are also a HUGE thing between you guys. 
whether the two of you are away at school, or on a quest without each other, iris messages would be made at every single opportunity. 
cabin sleepovers are a regular for you and percy!
you guys try to have them every couple of weeks and it’s actually a mystery as to how you haven’t been caught yet.
you’ve definitely curated many funny stories of how you’d almost been discovered by a harpy.
percy prefers that you come over to his cabin instead of him going to yours.
this may or may not be due to that one incredibly embarrassing moment where a few of your siblings caught you guys kissing in your cabin’s bathroom… (you and percy were teased for a solid week after that incident) 
it’s safe to say that your boyfriend’s cabin has been the location of all your sleepovers since then. 
you and percy DEFINITELY come up with a really intricate handshake.
it’s the type of handshake that takes more than thirty seconds to complete and consumed most of your free time while you two were memorizing it.
“percy, i love you, but i swear to the gods, if you mess this up again…” 
“um…sorry y/n, but does my leg move this way or that way?” 
but once you and him had the routine down, your friends and other couples around camp were SO annoyed with you guys! 
looking back on it, you two lowkey feel bad for making them watch you guys perform your handshake for minutes on end. 
but what can you say? it’s just too good to not show off.  
you glance up from your interlocked hands with percy and turn your head to face your friends, “okay, are you guys sure you’re looking?” 
annabeth nods tiredly, “yes y/n…we’ve all been watching for the past ten minutes.”
“guys, i swear this is the last time we’ll do it and then you guys can go to bed,” percy announces to the group. 
your friends all collectively let out a groan at the thought of sitting through yet another round of your guys’ handshake. 
you overhear percy talking to one of his friends at the campfire, “okay sure, she might’ve written a song dedicated to you, but did you two create a thirty second long handshake that took literal weeks to memorize? that’s right. i didn’t think so dude.” 
dates are kinda limited at camp, but you guys make do with what you have! 
beach/lake dates are a total must for you and him. 
if you’re not completely confident in your swimming skills, then he’ll take it as an opportunity to teach you!
but if you are a competent swimmer, expect tons and tons of competitions.
whether it be races across the lake or seeing who can hold their breath the longest, you guys have done it all. 
percy then has the audacity to be surprised when he wins every single time…as if he isn’t a son of poseidon?? 
one of your favorite dates of all time was when you and percy went strawberry picking! after picking them, you two attempted to make your own homemade strawberry jam. and to your amazement, it actually turned out okay?? :O
all your friends were pleasantly surprised to hear that no one had burned the kitchen down. 
he also loves to participate in any activities or hobbies that you’re into.
on his own time, percy would try to research or ask your siblings/friends about your hobbies! (he doesn’t want you to find out though) 
he wants to learn more because he genuinely finds them interesting and wants to understand all the terms and definitions of the things you talk about.
but the biggest reason why percy does it, is so he can see your reaction when you talk to him about the subject and he actually responds with an educated answer on the matter instead of his usual head nods! the way your eyes widen and your lips pull back to display the beautiful grin that he’s grown to love so dearly!! it’s like he’s fallen in love all over again. 
once he sees the way you’re smiling at him, he thinks that he wouldn’t mind spending a few more hours in the library. 
percy loves that you show genuine enthusiasm when it comes to his passions and hobbies, so it’s a given that he wants to make you feel the same way. 
if he could, percy could honestly spend all day listening to you talk about your passions. it’s just something in the way your eyes light up that has him utterly hooked.
percy looks at you with such adoration that sometimes you think he’s bored of your rambling.
“ugh, i just love it when-” you gaze down at your boyfriend who has his head resting on your lap. you notice that he’s staring at you, “oh sorry percy, i didn’t mean to bore you.” 
he shoots up out of your lap and looks at you, absolutely dumbfounded, “bored?”
you nod.
“babe, how could i ever be bored of you?” your boyfriend questions with such certainty, as if it were a genuine mystery he wants to know the answer to. 
you give him a shy smile, “i dunno, it’s just you weren’t responding so i thought you got tired of me talking.“
percy smiles sheepishly, “sorry, i just didn’t wanna interrupt you, you looked so happy. and trust me, y/n, i’d listen to you talk all day long if i could.”
you chuckle at his reassurance and lean in for a chaste kiss, “okay weirdo.” 
you guys are that one couple who literally can communicate solely through eye contact. 
someone’s acting stupid in public? you look at percy and he looks at you. next thing you know, the both of you are stifling your laughter. 
on a quest and something feels off? one swift glance at each other and you immediately know what your next plan of action is. 
sometimes it does get annoying though. because now you’re in the middle of a serious camp meeting, tearing up while attempting to hold in the loud cackle you’re both about to let out. 
all because you looked at each other at the wrong moment.
#telapathicconnection
percy also loves it when you wear his clothes!
especially when it’s a jacket or hoodie of his. it’s more personal to percy because it’s not just any other camp half-blood shirt that everyone has. 
he just feels so prideful knowing that it’s you walking around in his clothes. he just goes wild at the sight of you in them. to him, it’s a very effective way of telling everyone that you guys are dating. percy wants the world to know that you’re his and his only! 
one thing about percy is that no matter what, he’ll always make time for you.
oh you’re not feeling well? he’s dropping whatever he’s doing to go see you. you need someone to talk to? he won’t leave you feeling upset, so he’ll create an excuse to leave the sparring arena. 
you obviously do the same for your boyfriend, but you think it’s endearing how he’s so dedicated to you and will do absolutely anything to be there for you. 
when it comes to pda, he doesn’t really mind. his favorite form of pda is hand holding! whether you’re holding hands, linking pinkies, or linking arms, he just loves to show you off while walking about the camp grounds. in general, he just prefers to be touching you in some sort of way. 
at the campfire, he likes to have your hand in his lap so he can play with your fingers. (or your rings/bracelets if you do wear them!)
when you’re in bed, he likes to wrap his arm around your waist. but if you’re not big on cuddling, percy makes sure that his leg is touching your leg, or that he’s at least holding your hand. the list goes on but it’s just his way of telling you that he’s there, by your side!! 
you guys also most definitely have a polaroid camera. one christmas, you gifted him a dark blue polaroid and ever since then, it’s just been nonstop photos of one another. because of the fact that phones aren’t allowed, this is the next best thing to capture memories.
percy can’t even name how many photos he has of you in his nightstand, there’s a lot. so many to the point that he uses an old shoe box of his to hold them all.
but his absolute favorite photo (he keeps this one in his wallet) is a photo of you two sitting on the edge of the pier at the canoe lake. it was taken just after training, sweat drips down both of your temples, and your guys’ cheeks are flushed red. percy is holding the camera with his right hand while he has his left hand wrapped around your shoulders, both of you leaning into each other. and the sun is setting, shades of purples and oranges swirling together to create a gorgeous backdrop for the photo. you two are both smiling, eyes scrunched tightly (partially due to the sun) and teeth wide on display.
he just thoroughly adores your smile.
percy thinks you’re the prettiest person he’s ever seen. especially when you smile like that. and to think that’s how happy he makes you?? he could die happily with no regrets.
all in all, percy jackson is such an amazing boyfriend who loves you with all of his being. 10/10 would definitely date again!! 
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mikachacha · 1 year ago
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𝙹𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙲𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚒 (𝙹𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚞𝚜! 𝙱𝚊𝚍𝚊 𝙻𝚎𝚎 𝚡 𝚃𝚎𝚊𝚖 𝙱𝚎𝚋𝚎! 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛)
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Synopsis: You're trying to help your group promote your choreography for Hwasa's chili by doing a solo. What you didn't expect is for your video to blow up, attracting the people's attention and having a lot of people trying to flirt with you which made Bada, your girlfriend, very jealous.
Warnings: language and jealous Bada
(A/N: i have lots of fun making this 🥺🥺 thanks anon for your wonderful suggestions love ya 🫶🫶)
(Edit: i posted this earlier but tumblr is a hating bitch rn and deleted the bottom half right after the a/n)
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🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸
You woke up fairly early that morning, Bada went to the studio to prepare for her class while you went out to jog. After your jog, you thought it was a good idea to record a video of you dancing to Chili by Hwasa and using your group's choreography to also help promote your group. You picked out a quiet spot before you set your phone to start recording.
When you were finally satisfied with your video, you posted it on instagram. You didn't really expect anything when you posted that video so you just went on your day, totally forgetting about it Sowoen face timed you, the camera pointing at Bada who's currently sulking. You're confused and amused at the same time, you could hear the other girls laughing in the background and teasing Bada for being sulky and jealous.
"What happened to her? Why is she like that?" you asked Sowoen who were barely able to contain her laughter as Bada just lied down on the floor, looking like a kicked puppy, whining about everybody simping over her girlfriend on the internet that made the others laugh even more.
"Y/N-unnie your video is really viral right now and Bada-unnie is mad because everyone is literally simping and flirting with you." you heard Minah explain off cam. You quickly check your instagram and your notification is blowing up with thousands of likes, comments and new followers. Your dm's isn't doing any better. So many messages from random people and some pretty big names, all of them telling you that you're amazing at dancing. You couldn't help but giggle while reading some of the comments then you saw Chocol and Haechi's comments on your video. Even Akanen and Ling left some praises on your video. You had to bite the inside of your cheek to prevent yourself from laughing, now understanding why Bada is acting that way. She must've read the comment Haechi left on your video that made her very jealous.
"I'm just gonna get changed then head over to the studio so please tell Bada to calm her jealous ass." you said and soon got ready to meet Bada and your team. When you got there, Bada was already by the entrance waiting for you. A huge pout on her face before engulfing you in a hug. You smile and hug her back, whispering reassuring words to her so she can calm down.
"I'm proud that you're getting the recognition that you deserve but then I saw most of the comments are talking about how sexy you looked during the part where you twerked a bit then also there are people flirting with you.." Bada ranted and you could see the others watching not too far away, giggling at how their leader is currently acting.
"By others flirting with me, you mean Haechi? Baby, Haechi and I are just good friends. I chose you, I chose to be with you. I'm yours and no one is taking me away, okay? I love you, Lee Bada even if you're all jealous right now." you assured her but couldn't help tease her at the end because you rarely see this side of Bada, the jealous part and you found it extremely adorable. She just shot you a playful glare before kissing you on the lips, finally having calmed down from her jealous and sulky mood.
You returned the kiss and dragged her back to the studio where the others waited before having a genius idea of posting a video of you and Bada dancing to Chili and maybe goof around so she'll feel better.
"Another episode of Bada-unnie being so whipped for Y/N-unnie. Never gets old.." you heard Cheche comment and you giggled, agreeing with the younger member of your group. All of you posted a video of dancing to Chili then goofing around before you pulled Bada so you can have a video of just the two of you together. Both of you are all smiles while dancing then she decides to kiss you at the end, making you blush. She grabbed your phone and posted the video without any thought, feeling pleased with herself. You just rolled your eyes at her before kissing her cheek.
"Jealous ass.." You teased her and she pinched your cheek playfully which you reciprocated.
"Can't help it since my girlfriend is just way too hot." Bada retorts and you smile at her, just placing kisses all over her face. You could see your other teammates making exaggerated gagging noises through the mirror to which Bada responded with her middle finger raised.
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cinnamonest · 6 months ago
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OMG I MISSED YOUR WRITINGS ON SCARAMOUCHE SO MUCH!!
Please I need the version with camgirl reader x incel Scaramouche 🛐
And I hope you are well !!! <3
The way I was gonna make this a fairly simple post and then I got carried away and now it's 9k words WHOOPS
Anyway YES anon, I am on the slut girl x virgin boy agenda... although since I already have a camgirl, this time I went with like an onlyf*ns/e-girl darling + college AU >:3
//noncon, cyberstalking, blackmail, harassment, misogyny, sadism, nipple/ass stuff, revenge porn/leaking, darling is portrayed as being feminine + implied to have a bf
---
You tell yourself it's just to get you through college.
That's how you convinced yourself to start the account — regular camming requires a schedule and streaming and all that, which you'd rather not do, whereas the other outlets let you sell subscriptions for photos and videos, and there was a decent market out there, so you took your best shot, did some work to advertise yourself on mainstream social sites, and hey, it worked. You soon find yourself with a steady stream of income, and all you have to do is masturbate on camera and take a few posed photos of your body.
A few years of some extra income, and then you'll be done, get a better job, and you can delete the account and scrub the internet clean of any trace of the matter. Maybe some guy out there will keep some of the photos, but it can't be that bad.
This way, you can focus on your academics, which a regular part-time job would be too time-consuming for. You don’t have to worry about scheduling classes around a work schedule, either, which allows you to be more choosy on your class schedule, ensuring you get the later classes and don’t have to wake up early each day.
Except one, where you had no choice but to take the early class, as the other sections filled up fast. It’s one of those required tech-involved ones, you just picked from the list at random — one of those big classes with hundreds of people in a huge auditorium, any degree of personalism drowned by the sheer number of people. It’s a male-dominated subject field, and the body of attending students when you walk in clearly reflects that, so you just sit down in the very back at the first unclaimed seat you can find, pausing to say good morning to the boy next to you, who only briefly looks your way in acknowledgement.
The professor goes over the generic first-day material — that yes, you need the expensive textbook, that yes, he will check attendance, and no, he will not give you extra credit at the last minute at the end of the semester, so on and so on… and—
—you’ll be working with the person next to you for the rest of the semester.
Even-numbered seats, the person to your immediate left, odd-numbered seats, to your immediate right. You turn and smile at the guy you’re thus assigned to, the same one you spoke to a few moments ago — once again, he just glances over at you and nods with some vague acknowledgement and then resumes doing what he’s been doing since the professor started, which is scrolling on his phone beneath the desk, only half-paying attention. That does not bode well for your predictions of how equally-yoked you’ll be in your work ethic… but no big deal.
It's one of those classes with a midterm and final project that you work on throughout the semester, rather than tests… which, hey, that could be fun, you tell yourself. You think you can get along. He doesn’t seem to care about what's going on around him much, which is not exactly good, but isn’t bad.
That dopey, happy demeanor… so obnoxious… ugh, you’ve got a notebook (an aesthetic, pretty one at that), and you're pulling it out on the first day of class? For what?
Except you aren’t reading him all that well at all. Unbeknownst to you, his eyes shift over to you and your activities throughout the class. And the reality is he very much does care.
That is, from the very second he lays eyes on you, you irritate him.
Then you write the class and your name at the top of the page all cutesy and artsy-looking, and then— God, now you're pulling out the multiple colors of highlighters and pens. Is that— is that one of those sparkly gel pens? Oh, it is. You’re making a little header with today’s date for your notes with it. Just kill him now. This is practically psychological torture.
Thus, while from your perspective, it feels like he barely pays you a second thought, in reality the rest of the period for him is spent just stewing in a stream of bitter, jaded thoughts.
Look at you with your… girl clothes and girl pens and girl notebook… you probably think you're so cute, spending money on dumb stuff like that… and smiling like an idiot. What are you so happy for. Why are you even taking this class when you'll just be bad at it. Why are you dressed like you put effort into it. Just pick up one of the sweatshirts laying on your bedroom floor like a reasonable person. And why do you smell so nice too.
He mulls over the negativity for the remainder of the class period, totally zoned out until people start packing up, which is the cue to leave.
Except you stop him before he can make a quick exit, holding out your phone, open to a new entry in your contacts.
Ah, since we'll need to work on the project, I can text you…
Right. That. Ugh.
The awkward discomfort of standing there and entering a name and number while you stand there with that dumb little nervous smile is only made more upsetting by the bitter realization that this will mark the first time he's ever had his number in a girl's phone before. Great, now he's going to be depressed for the rest of the day, and it's your fault.
You say thanks and smile again and your hands brush against his when you take your phone back and it makes him physically flinch in recoil — and you definitely noticed it, you mumble a little ah, sorry as if you're trying to make it even more awkward, now he's got to live with the humiliation of that too, and it's still your fault. Clearly, you are going to be nothing but a source of frustration.
And even once he's moped all the way back to the the comfort of his nice, dark apartment, he still can't escape your torment — no sooner does he flop down into bed than his phone goes off…
>Hi! Just wanted to make sure you can save my number too!
You add the little smiling emoji. It makes his eye twitch.
Trying to act all nice and sweet as if you're not only being pleasant because you're forced to work together. He knows full well you'd be all bitchy and demanding and hypersensitive in any other context, and probably all snobbish too, probably would barely pay him any mind.
Even if you are genuinely sweet, that in and of itself is still basically torturing him. Because what’s the point in you being sweet if you’re not going to give him anything more than that? With that in mind, even your niceness is just a cruel tease.
And why would you even be so happy to begin with? Doesn't being a girl suck? If he was something so weak and inferior and unintelligent, he'd be even more miserable about life, and that's really saying something. Maybe it's one of those things where you're so dumb that you lack self-awareness, so you can live a life of ignorant bliss... at the same time, the notion that you’re unaware of how inferior you are is equally frustrating. You should know, that knowledge should weigh on your mind all the time.
The frustration makes his chest feel tight, makes him grind his teeth… naturally, he has to get it out somehow, and there's a very convenient means to do so.
The imageboards he frequents almost always have a “leaked images” thread up and running, communities where they post e-girls’ nudes and revenge porn. The wrongness of it, of course, is the appeal.
Besides, they all deserve it. Some are images originally sent to boyfriends, posted as an act of revenge after cheating or dumping the guy (so it's deserved, really), others are leaked videos and photos from various pay-to-view networks and websites (also deserved, for being a whore), and finally some are just creepshots in public places (deserved once more, for dressing that way).
And the endless amount of the content and surprisingly good tagging system means that one can find any sort of content, and for the leaked porn accounts, it includes the girl's username and links to more of her, so you can see more of the same girl.
Like with this one, that just so happens to catch his eye. There's a whole page where some guy has paid for every single photo this girl has made, and put it out there for everyone to see for free. It's solo stuff, too, which is preferred — seeing couples making videos together, thereby watching the girl love on some guy, is depressing — and getting off to it is much more satisfying than any of the other girls on this thread, considering she looks like you.
…A lot, actually.
He's already memorized your annoying, pretty little face. The title of the video has the words “college girl” in it, too. Adds to the immersion, can feel like it’s really you, degrading yourself like that… of course, when it’s over, he has to deal with the reality that it isn’t, but the momentary pretending is cathartic.
And sure enough, as the first week passes, you quickly prove just as irritating as he initially suspected. You smile at him and talk to him every class, for some unknown, malicious ulterior motive. Are you trying to be belittling? Or are you trying to make him like you so that he'll do favors for you? Or is it for your own amusement?
Either way, the obvious deceit of it all is sickening. It's a commonly known female behavior. You try to come across as so sweet when in reality it's all an act, and you have some horrible reason for it. He just doesn't know what the reason is in your case yet. It would be better to be a bad person outright — the slimy underhanded fakeness of it all is what makes that type of evil so contemptible.
You, though, you’re just a bit puzzled. Normally, being nice to people works well… but this guy keeps sort of glaring at you… maybe that’s just how his face naturally is? But then, he also doesn’t talk very nice either. Not particularly mean, per se, but you can sort of sense an irritation, like you’ve done something wrong… you try to make the best of it, tell yourself you’re just imagining it. Besides, if he really didn’t like you, he wouldn’t respond when you talk to him, or would sit elsewhere, right? It’s not like you have to maintain the same seats all semester, as long as you work on the required material outside of class. So, you tell yourself, he must just be one of those people that naturally has that demeanor.
You’re not nearly as aware of it, but he makes his own observations of you too. You don’t check your phone nearly as much as he does, but every now and then, you look at something or another, and he always makes sure to subtly turn his eyes to see… it’s usually something stupid, like texts from friends, or worse, what appears to be a boyfriend, some male name you text often.
The first time you’re forced to meet outside of class, at the library per your suggestion — a very awkward interaction, but you seem to be fairly unbothered — you take a moment to check it when it vibrates. You’re sitting at an angle that makes it difficult for him to see without moving in a way that would catch your attention, but by pretending to take a swig of whatever can of liquid caffeine he has today (you had the audacity to comment how unhealthy it is), that he can tilt his head enough just to barely make out your screen without being noticed.
Your phone is open to an email.
The words flash across the screen for just a split second before you turn the screen off, but that one second is enough to make out the top of the screen. Enough time for the ‘hello, (username),’ preface to the email right beneath a very familiar blue logo to register with his brain.
He nearly chokes.
It takes every ounce of willpower to even try to hide the natural reaction — his eyes widen, he goes tense, he has to turn his torso away and pretend to fish something out of his cluttered bottomless void of a backpack whilst trying to refrain from coughing.
But then again, you put the phone away so quickly once you saw what it was… and the video from the other day…?
No. That can't be right.
There's no way. There's no way, there's no way, there's no way.
He can’t get back to his own place fast enough. Dropping the keys trying to unlock the door out of excitement, immediately whipping out his own phone, and he’s on the bookmarks tab before he can even sit down. Back to the leaks site, scrolling down to the tags where they put the girl’s username.
You’re wholly unbothered, going right back to talking to him in that overly-sweet tone, so nice, so frustrating, so torturous. You’re saying something. He has to get you to repeat yourself… no, it was just some pointless question about the homework.
To hell with that, that’s not even remotely important anymore… but he can’t voice that thought out loud, so he’s forced to tolerate the torment of waiting out the rest of your meeting until you finally say you’ll have to keep working later.
The usernames match. The one in your email was the exact same as the one now on the screen.
It's one of those moments where what's in front of him is so surreal, he's left so stunned, that he just sits there for a second, completely still, blinking and taking it in. Something that's too perfect to be real. This can't be actually happening, he's mistaken.
And thus he's just left perfectly still, a stupor of disbelief, sitting there in the darkness of the room with only the harsh light of phone screen shining up on his face as it slowly sinks in. It takes a minute — this is just the sort of thing that doesn't happen, it's far too perfect, he has to convince himself it isn't a dream.
And once it registers as reality, it feels exhilarating.
For one, it proves every suspicion right. He really did have a valid reason to be distrusting of your innocent girl act. To think, this whole time you were trying to fool him into believing you were good.
But all along, you were whoring out online, and basically, the fact that you're not upfront about that to someone you barely know is the same as outright lying about it.
Up until this point, life has just been so boring, so disappointing, just going through day to day… even college was just a thing to do because it's what everyone else does. But now? Now he has something exciting. A sudden sense of something meaningful, even if only as an outlet for pure, unadulterated malice.
As for you, well, you get a… well, a follower, but certainly not a fan.
The boy is a world-class hater. It's not passive hating, it's active hating. There is actual effort being put in here, and a lot of it at that.
In terms of the content itself, it's nothing you haven't seen before — some guy leaving comments and DMs calling you a whore and a slut and every nasty name one can conjure, saying you've ruined any hopes of a relationship by doing this, why would anyone ever date you when they can see you naked for a few bucks, telling you to get a real job, blah blah… fairly generic. A lot of the verbiage is certainly non-original, and more or less recycled, specific choices of words and phrases and lingo you know you’ve seen before in those pockets of the internet where certain types of men congregate.
But the sheer dedication to it is what catches you off guard. You're pretty sure this guy is more dedicated to harassing you than you are to the job itself. There's messages from all hours of the day, and you're certain after a short time that he makes multiple accounts for the sole purpose of harassing you. Not to mention he follows or adds you on everything — all the socials you've linked (you keep several associated to your account to lure in horny guys from mainstream sites), adds you on discord and any other messaging app you have (and you have no way of knowing which users are legitimate or if it's him, so you have to add them back and wait to find out each time). One of which you didn't even have listed on your page, so you realize he would have had to go through various apps and search the multiple variations of your username you use until finding you.
Telling him to fuck off accomplishes nothing, in fact he seems to derive great satisfaction from making you upset about it. Tells you that you should be glad — you wanted male attention, right? You wouldn't be posting yourself getting off and flashing your tits on camera for the world to see if you didn't, slut. He adds that insult to just about everything he says to you.
Blocking him only leads to him making new accounts (and then mocking you for trying to block him). You even reached out to a customer support team on one of your social media apps and got him permanently IP banned, which he then immediately circumvented in less than a few hours, making sure to inform you that changing one's IP is so easy and you're so dumb for thinking that would do anything.
But why you, specifically? Why decide to torment you out of every other girl doing this stuff? You don't know. You never asked for this. You never did anything wrong to anyone. You even scrolled back on your social accounts to see if you ever said anything someone could take offensively or had a negative interaction with someone, but found nothing. There's nothing to explain why this one man in particular has decided to come after you specifically, nothing you can think of at least. It feels like the universe just hates you.
It's actually kinda sad. You almost feel bad for this guy, who apparently has so much time to spare and nothing better to do than harass the same girl on the internet day in and day out. You did once shoot back a reply of don’t you have anything better to do?, which actually did make him stop… for about ten hours or so, then it was right back to it.
It's deserved, though, he thinks. E-girls are reprehensible. Taking advantage of guys’ loneliness for money.
Infuriating that you advertise something that he— well, that most guys want so bad, but don't actually give the real thing, only a simulation of it. Make them drool over you, while you hide behind the safety of the screen, far away from what those guys would do to you if they could get their hands on you.
And you know that too, don't you? You know how defenseless you are, know how much danger you'd be in if you teased without putting out like that to a guy in real life, and you do it anyway knowing you're untouchable, you must be so smug about it. Infuriating.
He's not like those simps of yours though, he finds you too morally reprehensible to be drawn to the curves of your body and the parts of you that you post and the sounds you make and how easy it is to imagine the softness of your skin and the way you feel and your warmth and the way you look directly into the camera as you moan and it feels like eye contact—
Anyway, he has standards. And self-respect.
Besides, he knows from stalking your social accounts — including your real ones with your real identity attached, separate from the others — that you have something like a boyfriend. Some guy who shows up in your pictures a lot. What a pathetic idiot. Who lets their girlfriend do this sort of thing? Even disregarding that, does this guy not know you’re meeting with him for your project too? He would never allow you to do something like that, were it him in that position. You must go after spineless guys who will let you walk all over them or something, and would only even accept boyfriends that allow you to do what you do.
That’s why, see, he would never accept something like that. Sure, there would be positives, like getting to see that sweet annoying smile and hear your happy obnoxious precious voice each and every day, and getting to touch you and be around you all the time, and you probably do really nice things for the person you’re with too, and he could always just force you to delete the accounts and never post yourself online again— but, whatever.
Point is, he’s better than stooping so low. He’ll keep living a respectable life, just like he does now — so he thinks as the phone alarm goes off, one of many set reminders to go send you more messages.
It's an awkward relationship, but you're pretty sure he doesn't hate you or anything, which is good. He's hard to read — he seems perpetually either bored or irritated, always slouched over, always maintaining that ‘I really wish I weren't here right now’ tone of voice, lots of heavy sighs or tsks scattered into his speech. Even when you agree to meet at the library to work on the homework and midterm project, he quickly establishes a pattern of being at least ten to fifteen minutes late (without any acknowledgement or apology at that), and frankly, you do the vast majority of the actual work, he just slaps his name on the corner next to yours once it's done.
The torment detracts from your sleep. You're late to your class more than once, trying to sneak in unnoticed by the professor and mumbling apologies to the students you have to slip by to get to your seat. Your partner doesn't seem to care much, at least — he just lazily glances over at you with a flat expression, then goes back to scrolling (he doesn't need to take notes, you'll just send him yours anyway).
He does step in to help when it's too difficult, you can't solve the problem yourself… which is how you realize that, in spite of being remarkably low-effort, he actually does understand the material, much better than you do at that. It's a bit embarrassing, since he makes it out to be so simple, but at least it somewhat compensates for all the work you do.
He's not particularly mean about it, he's just… not nice. The tone and choice of words tends to be not-so-subtly making you out to be dumb for not getting it, or that it's easy, or otherwise belittling.
…You really don't get that one? It's the exact same thing as the last one.
You give a sheepish smile and rub the back of your head.
Aha… sorry…
But it gets done, and that's what matters. You just walk away from each meeting feeling like an idiot, which isn't exactly a great feeling.
But even though you initially felt like the guy didn’t care for you, you quickly notice that he’s started to walk all the way back to your place after your meetings while you talk. You supposed he wouldn’t do that if he didn’t at least somewhat enjoy your company.
And you do try to make conversation. You ask about what other classes he takes…only to learn that he doesn't go to any other classes, since this is the only one where attending is required. He did the math, and he just has to do good on the finals for the other classes to pass, no need to show up for the tests and quizzes and lectures and stuff… and he did research into the professors to find ones where past students confirm they recycle the exact same tests and the past ones are posted online, and he's already got a good cheating method that's only been caught once in all the years he's used it… so there's no point in showing up, he says.
It's a very different mentality than yours, but you try to smile and refrain from saying anything negative. And you try interests and social life as topics, but quickly glean from what little he says that the guy has none of the latter and more or less just a phone and gaming addiction for the former.
Which you have no trouble believing, because good God, does the boy have a totally fried attention span. Even in your meetings, you swear he can't go five minutes without staring at his phone.
Oh, you like that too…?
That does end up helping you find a means to try and get closer. You manage to find one opening, something flash across the screen for some upcoming game. One you've been looking forward to as well.
Huh? You can’t like that thing. He likes that thing. It's not for females. It’s for people with good taste… it’s good… you can’t… someone like you would never be able to properly appreciate it… and now you’re just babbling away with that dumb smile while he’s going through a psychological crisis and rethinking every choice in life because of you. Does this put you two on the same intellectual level...? No, of course not, he has to quickly shake off any such doubts.
You were hoping to get a positive reaction, but you get silent bewilderment in his expression at first, for just a second.
Still, you’re supposed to be boring and a normie… you can’t just suddenly shatter the image of you he’s already constructed… and from the way you're talking about it, you know too much to just be pretending to like something for attention (which is the obvious automatic assumption for when females like media that's actually good and worth consuming).
Devastating. Now he has to consider the possibility that you do have interests and a personality besides being deceitfully sweet and whoring online.
But from your perspective, he just crosses his arms and shrugs.
Kind of, I guess.
And God, then you smile at him again. Every time you do that, it gives him some godawful tight-chested feeling, like you’re trying to kill him with psychic damage.
What gives you the right to be so happy right now anyway? Aren’t you supposed to be in constant distress, now? Is he not doing good enough of a job at tormenting you? You seemed upset, but clearly not upset enough, if you’re still emotionally stable enough to be nice to him. He has to break you, make you too distraught to even go on.
Online, you’re so mean, you never have anything nice to say, even though he’s not that mean to you — well, he could be worse, at least, which is basically the same thing.
Actually, he decides, how you behave in real life will be a good standard of how good he’s doing at making your life miserable. Once it starts to noticeably affect you even in real life, that means it’s sufficient.
But you prove resilient. Each day, you seem to get up, summon some resolve to still enjoy your life, and are still pleasant and friendly… or maybe you’re just really good at acting. Yes, obviously that’s it, since your whole sweetness thing is just an act in the first place.
On your end, the harassment gets worse. It comes in all hours of the day — does this guy not sleep? It’s almost hard to believe someone hates you this much, or even has the energy to keep this up… you start trying to just ignore it.
You tried threatening to report the guy for harassment, but he points out that he hasn’t threatened you with any real harm, and only targeted your public accounts, so no laws broken… and he’s already prepared by taking measures to— well, you don’t understand the spew of lingo that follows, but you gather that the jist is that it would be very difficult to trace him.
So you start to ignore it. You try your best to just not let it get to you, let the comments and messages go without acknowledgement or response. It’s actually somewhat relieving, if you just pretend it doesn’t exist. At first, when you start ignoring him, the messages get more frequent.
But then, it goes quiet for a day. Just around twenty-four hours, you don't get messages, nor comments.
It should make you feel relieved, you think, but it doesn't. Quite the opposite — you feel uneasy. Like something will happen.
He's getting bored, you see. You don't react as strongly anymore as you used to. You used to get so upset at all the messages he sent, and it was so fun to watch how you'd get all defensive and angry in your replies.
Then your replies got shorter, and now— what gives your the right to ignore him? It infuriates him. Dumb whore, treating him like you think you're so much better… or, the gut-wrenching thought passes through his mind, maybe you're busy, you’re probably visiting the guys you sleep around with, since someone like you could never be loyal to that boyfriend he's certain you have.
The only option is to progress things further. He has to think about that. He didn't really have a plan on where to go from here, but now he's started to think about the bigger picture, what he wants in the long term… and that's not going to go over well for you.
It takes some work and digging on his end, but it's worth it.
It's around three in the morning when your phone goes off. It just barely manages to wake you up. You think to yourself that you should remember to turn off the notifications for messaging apps… but for now, you sit up, groggily unlocking your phone. Seeing who the message is from, though, snaps you into full alertness.
A message that makes you go stiff, staring at your phone wide-eyed and slack-jawed, a cold knot of dread forming in your gut that quickly turns to an electrifying surge of pure panic as you read.
The name of your academic institution. The names, emails and phone numbers of your immediate family members. Your full, real name — and your address, down to the unit number.
Your heart sinks into your stomach. The glaring light hurts your tired eyes, but you can't look away.
You know he's just waiting on a response. Probably knows you're panicking, but knows you have no choice but to comply — and you're forced to give him the satisfaction of seeing you type back.
>What do you want from me?
It's only a few seconds before you get a reply.
>From now on, do what I want
>Or I ruin your life.
You hesitate a while before responding. Poor you, you must be so scared now that you're finally getting what you deserve. And even then, you just send back a ‘fine,’ even though it took you so long to respond. You were probably trying to think of how to respond, probably typed out longer potential replies, but decided on that to seem tough or something. That's actually almost endearing.
And oh, it's so, so satisfying to finally see you crumble, even if just a bit, the next day. For you to come shuffling into class for once with a downtrodden, nervous expression, making your way over to your spot without the usual greeting.
…Except that's also irritating. What makes you think you can just not say hello, now that you've established a routine of doing so every day of this class? For all you know, he's just the person you know in real life, so you're basically willingly choosing to potentially disappoint him. Not that you are disappointing him, but like, if he actually cared about your dumb little daily greeting, then he would be. He even gives you several extra seconds, and you still don't do it.
You're still fidgeting nervously, lost in thought when the mumbling directed at you pulls you out of your thoughts.
…Something wrong with you?
You seem to realize your sullen energy and attempt to fix it with a twitching, obviously forced smile.
O-oh, no, I'm just tired, haha… good morning!
He doesn't say anything back, just turns back to phone-scrolling as usual. You realize your melancholy must be showing on your face.
You're being overdramatic, too, he thinks. He didn't even give you any demands yet, since he decided it would be more fun to make you wait in suspense for a few hours or so. Seeing you squirm is funny, but really, you're acting like it's so much worse than it is. What a weakling, so sensitive.
It's just gonna be stuff you're used to anyway…
Which is somewhat true. You're used to the demand for private, custom content.
Men pay you sometimes incredible amounts of money for the stuff. Usually, the customization is about personalization — sometimes it's kind of sad, wanting you to say their name or that you love them while you look at the camera, and sometimes it's just more niche fetish stuff, like pictures of your feet or wearing a weird costume.
But everything this mystery man wants is different — the personalization has to do with the fact that it's painful, humiliating, or both. Moreover, he's never content with the first try.
Stuffing your holes with toys and sitting down on them so they go all the way in, specifically, ‘as many as you can fit’ — but even after the painful effort of getting one in each hole—
>That's not enough.
You can fit at least one more somewhere. And you're intentionally using the smaller toys, aren't you? You won't be able to do that next time, so don't try that again.
Then there's the command to get those clamps on your nipples you used in a video of yours a long time ago, the ones connected to each other by a chain, and to tighten them then pull hard enough for them to come off. You have to take a few deep breaths to summon the ability to do it, and even then, it takes a few tugs to get them to come off. By the time they do, your nipples are swollen and red and your eyes are watery from the sting, but nonetheless, a message comes through within a minute of sending the video.
>You didn't tighten them all the way first.
>Do it over.
Or the one to deep throat that one huge toy you have, the one you used in this one video a long time ago — which you now regret ever posting, since there's a reason that you never used that monstrosity again, much less in your throat. At first you're not even sure you can fit it into your mouth, but you force it somehow.
On and on the demands come. He's not paying for any of it, of course, but the premise is the same.
Still, it's not enough. Come on, you didn't even get it very far in, you have to at least get half down your throat. And you didn't hold the phone close enough, can't hear your gagging choking sounds.
>Do it again.
The timing is often terrible, shortly before or after your classes, or odd hours of the night, forcing you to stop whatever you're doing to meet the demand. Thankfully, though, at least you've never gotten a message from him during your meetups with your class partner — you're certain your distress would show on your face, and it would be hard to come up with an excuse for it.
It becomes such routine, and all happens so quickly, it feels surreal, like you're just forced to accept it and go with it. There’s no time to really process it, as you have to get back to doing your school work and going to class and trying to keep up with your regular video content, it's all so overwhelming, yet so simple, you just have to do what you have to do.
One moment you're slapping yourself in the face while you bounce up and down on a toy so long that it bruises your insides for some jerk that's blackmailing you, and running to class the next, desperately trying to rub at the marks on your face to make them go away.
You're worried that the stress is beginning to show. Your most recent quiz scores are lower than usual, you're getting less sleep. Your insides are always sore. You're paranoid and uneasy, and you know it has to be somewhat evident.
Some of the individual demands have lasting consequences, too. Once you were commanded to choke yourself with a belt on camera, specifically until it left bruises… which you begged and protested against because you had one of your class partner meet-ups scheduled for later the same day, but your tormentor said he didn't care and insisted, so you did it, forcing yourself to go through it… and sending an additional picture at the end just to show the purplish marks in detail, up close.
It wasn't the end of the world for your meeting though — the weather wasn't right for it, but you found something that covered your neck up, at least, so the bruises didn't show. That much, at least, allows you to be at ease… although your classmate seems to be in a particularly bad mood that day.
On another occasion, you find yourself laying on your side, gasping and wincing trying to force one of the larger toys you have into your ass, all the way to the base as instructed, toes curling as you pump it back and forth, in and out… only to be told you weren't supposed to touch yourself while you did it, so, predictably, you have to do it again, the ring of muscle clenching down as it's stretched — and, of course, the act leaves a remnant sensation lasting the rest of the day. You have to rush it too, or you'll be late, due to the horrible timing of the command.
You manage to get to class, but when you move to sit, an ache of pain runs up your spine from your poor abused hole, and you wince, face grimacing at the pain.
It doesn't go unnoticed. The guy next to you, ever observant to everything except the professor, casts a lazy glance over to you, looks you up and down before asking what’s the matter, albeit in a half-caring, bored tone of voice…
You give the oh, nothing, I'm fine! response, stammer out something about hurting your leg yesterday, and he merely gives you an 'ah' of acknowledgement before turning his gaze back down… he rests his chin against his hand so that his mouth is covered up, but you swear, you can detect a slight grin from the shape of his eyes. You suppose it checks out that he'd find your clumsiness amusing, even if it's a lie.
On and on it goes. All the time. Day in, day out. It starts off as once per day, but then your tormentor starts piling smaller requests on top of those. Even beyond the daily video, you get increasingly frequent messages at all times of the day — to take a picture of your tits or ass, or a short video of you fingering yourself, or some sort of angle or pose of your body, writing something on your skin, so on and so on.
He doesn't accept any delays, either. You only get a few minutes to fulfill a demand before getting an impatient follow-up asking what the hold up is. Sleep isn't an excuse either, so you're told, so you have to start turning your phone on loud at night to wake you if need be.
You sense a growing impatience. The frequency increases still, as does the intensity of the content you're forced to make. It's as if it's building up to something — surely it has to reach a limit, or he has to get bored, or he'll ditch you and find a new outlet for his sadistic thrills, you hope. You just hope it ends in a way that's positive for you… but you're afraid of the opposite. What if even after all this, he just ruins your life anyway? It's a very real possibility, one you begin considering increasingly as you think over the whole situation.
The increasing severity and number of demands makes you feel like he's getting more upset, as if you're doing something that makes him mad, even though you have no idea what that could be.
You are right, though.
He's also noticed how much more frequently he gets the urge to demand something from you. How much more the itch has grown, the compulsive need to see you hurting and degrading yourself more and more. You've long since passed the point where he has more videos and photos of you all to himself than those available online — he's been counting — but it's still not enough.
And with the realizations that he's engaging with you more, he realizes that he's also thinking about you more.
No, “more” isn't quite accurate. All the time. Constantly. You never leave his head, everything else feels like a distraction.
And that's only more infuriating. He's very self-aware, realizes it's getting worse, realizes you essentially occupy his thoughts every waking second.
Even then, the distractions aren't working. At one point he realized he literally cannot stop himself from messaging you, it's a compulsion, a need, and the realization of his own lack of self-control regarding it is maddening. He actively tried, told himself to wait until the next day, but just couldn't. Even if he plays games or watches whatever brain-rotting media he tries to consume, his thoughts keep drifting to you. Hell, ever since latching onto you, he’s stopped harassing other random women online in general, and that was pretty much one of his biggest hobbies in the past.
What gives you the right? To get inside his head like that? Make him constantly distracted and wondering about what you're doing, forcing him to keep tabs on you? What makes you think you can just come into his life and control him like this, and think you'll get away with it? You've more or less taken advantage of an innocent person who did nothing wrong to you. Used your body to exploit his weaknesses and manipulate him into doing all this.
You don't get to do that. You have to be held accountable.
You're constantly making him worry about you, what you're doing, who you're talking to, and not knowing is a maddening feeling. It feels like nausea, a sick feeling that completely consumes the mind, rendering it incapable of doing or focusing on anything else, only cycling the same obsessive rage and worry and paranoia until it becomes unbearable.
But there's a way to get rid of that, and give you what you deserve, and get what you owe him all at the same time.
He waits, only another week or so — a frustrating week, but spent planning ahead and gathering necessary stuff — but finally, given the timing, you send a text he was hoping you'd send asking about meeting up again, to finish up the project as the end of the semester approaches.
You're a bit caught off-guard by the message, not to mention how quickly he replies.
>Come over here.
You hesitate, re-reading to try and ensure that you're understanding correctly, and finally ask for clarification that he means to his place.
He says yes. Something about how he's supposed to have something delivered that he'll have to sign, and so he has to be at the apartment when that happens, so, y'know, best for you to come over.
Which is nice.
It's just… odd.
Inviting you over, even if for a required activity, feels very out of line with the person you've come to know, however surface-level said knowing may be. Then again, maybe this is the guy's way of trying to be nice. Everyone expresses appreciation differently.
You're still thinking on it when he adds another text saying that his roommate will be there, preemptively apologizes for any disturbance that will cause… well, you figure if someone else is there, it can’t be anything sinister. That helps you make up your mind, so you agree. At this point, you know each other well enough to warrant trust.
…It’s still pretty awkward, though. The apartment is about like a picture you would expect to see uploaded to the internet as a joke about male living spaces. Borderline barren, barring the computer and the bare minimum furniture and appliances needed to survive, plus some clothes and empty cans and such strewn in various places across the floor, all dark lighting and void of color.
That being said, you quickly realize the apartment is only a studio, and there’s only one bed. The roommate doesn't exist.
And something just feels wrong, in a way you can’t articulate. Like your instincts are urging you to leave. You feel uneasy. Goosebumps spread across your skin. Are you just being paranoid…?
There is something else, though, that immediately catches your attention. You notice that the wall isn’t exposed, rather, most of the room is covered with a layer of some sort of paneling, lining the wall almost as thoroughly as wallpaper. You inquire what it is.
Soundproofing.
An unpleasant answer, but he wouldn’t be so upfront about it unless it was for harmless reasons. You refrain from inquiring about the other odd things you start to notice — locks on some cabinets despite seemingly living alone, a roll of tape sitting on the desk with no discernable purpose.
As awkward as the tension is, you really have no option but to sit on the bed, as its the only surface other than the floor. You try not to contemplate how often the average college-aged boy washes bedsheets.
It occurs to you, though, that right now would be the worst possible timing for a message from your unknown harasser, and you certainly can’t take any photos or videos here… thus, just as you sit down and begin to work, you pick up your phone from where you set yours next to his, and type out a quick message, basically pleading with the unknown man to leave you along for the next few hours, because, as you explain, you literally can’t do anything for the time being.
You read it over, and hit send.
And before you can even put the phone back down, there's a vibration a mere arms-length away from you, as the other phone in the room lights up.
And there, in the notification that pops up on the screen, are the very words you just sent.
There's a few seconds where nothing happens.
Both your heads naturally turn to the sound the moment it happens, but after that, it's just… still. You’re frozen still, he’s frozen still. Both your eyes go wide, and the quiet seconds pass, processing the information before you.
And then, he sighs, body relaxing, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose, muttering as if met with some major inconvenience.
God, why do you have to make this more difficult.
Besides, he already turned the lock that locks you in from the inside, even though you probably weren’t aware of what it was, so you’re already trapped anyway. And you squeal, of course, predictably, but that’s what the soundproof panels are for.
He's not particularly worried like he would have been any other time — this was the plan now anyway, but you're throwing things off schedule. Yet another transgression to hold you accountable for.
You do try to run. You at least deserve that much credit. He was so close to considering you a genuine marvel of human evolution, with how nonfunctional your survival instincts seemed to be.
But you’re sitting with your legs folded, so, you don’t have the time required to stand any chance of hopping up and running. The moment your legs start to move to stand, he’s already got you by the arm.
You even seemed to process everything a bit quicker than he would have thought. Maybe you’re not that stupid after all, just… a little less.
You still are incredibly stupid though. He’s almost surprised you agreed to come. So naive, so dumb, so trusting.
And so loud. Squealing like a little animal caught by a predator — which, well, isn’t too far off, but it still hurts his ears.
Shut up, shut up, shut up…
You can hear the growling voice in your ear, even now that he has your face pressed into the mattress, arm latched around your waist. You’re squirming so hard too, but even fighting with all the strength you can summon, it feels like trying to push back a brick wall. He seems to notice as much as you do.
…Is that actually the best you can do?
Not the first time he’s said those words to you — though before, it was over text, mocking you into filling all those perverse desires. It feels far more biting now.
And it’s so, so, so satisfying to see you realize just how dumb you are, as you put everything together. To watch you slowly grasp everything, realize just how badly you’ve fucked up. He even flips you onto your back just to see your face go through all the stages of emotion. It’s hilarious, and adorable too. The confusion and betrayal and panic and anger.
Oh, you get so mad. It’s actually the best part. You’re practically snarling now, reaching up to try and claw at him, kicking, baring your teeth. Any traces of the sweet demeanor you once held is long gone as you lash out… and then, a purely and entirely euphoric transition to fear.
Aw. Poor thing. After you struggle so much, your breathing gets faster, the fury dissipates as your eyes well with tears. The demands to let you go turn to miserable little pleas.
Maybe you can go back and forth. Maybe if he taunts you again you’ll get angry once more, and then if he slaps you you’ll get meek and fearful again? That would be nice, to have reliable ways to switch your emotions around, as if controlling them with a button. There will be plenty of time to find out later.
But now he gets the opportunity to finally tell you how long you made him wait for this. Mocks you for how naive you were. Brings up specifics from all those videos you sent him. Did you think it would just be left at that? Did you really not realize it wouldn’t be enough? No, of course you didn’t, and that’s why you ended up coming here like the dumb little slut you are.
And look, you even wore something so easy to flip up, practically easy access. You just have no shame at all, do you. See, it goes in perfectly because you’ve been using those toys for those videos, and… ah, so that’s— that’s what it feels like… holy shit… this is what you basically robbed him of all this time? Now you’ll really have to suffer to make up for it…
Well, you wouldn’t get it. It’s about what you did subconsciously, mind games and all that. His torment was intentional on your end, and that’s what matters. Now you'll get to spend a very very long time atoning for it. You should be happy. You won't even have to worry about making money anymore.
This wouldn’t be happening to you if you didn’t do what you did to him, you know. It’s your fault. He tells you so. And when you look up at him, eyes welled with tears, stammering out a question of what he means—
What did I ever d-do to you…?
—he realizes that it’s… difficult to give that question a concrete answer.
What did you do, really...?
The only problem that remains is how you rushed things. He was at least going to wait until you finished the project, but now it’s incomplete… do professors grant extensions if your partner goes missing…?
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vilebird · 7 months ago
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BOTH TOO MUCH AND NOT ENOUGH
1) "I have been found wanting, Natalie thought; I have made myself unacceptable and am not worthy." - hangsaman, by shirley jackson
2) text: "meat must be beaten brutal into tenderness, that any body softens with violence, she grinds salt into the carcass, like a wound, a memory". image: a carcass of beef, cleaned, with the ribs on prominent display, painted in oils and rendered in thick strokes of red, orange, tan and white, on a plain dark red background. the text is cutouts on top, dark red text on light tan. - Family Portrait as Unfinished Meal, by Torrin A. Greathouse and Le Bœuf by Chaim Soutine. collage put together by @invisiblemonstrosity
3) a pale hand crushing ripe red strawberries, green leaves still attached, on a plain white background. - apparently by ouiloved on flickr, but they seem to have deleted.
4) bust photo of a tan person with a spotlight on them outside in the dark, head turned down, shoulder length messy wet black hair obscuring their face. their hand is raised to their chest and they are wearing a white tank top. fake blood is splattered and wiped around their chest and mouth. - i can't actually find this one all my attempts lead back to unsourced tumblr posts if you know where its from. help me
5: "You have no one who has any sort of consideration for you. You have had patience and endurance, and what have they done for you? Half-killed you." - carlyle’s house and other sketches, by virginia woolf
6: "try your whole life to be righteous and be good, wind up on your own floor, choking on blood" - sept 15th 1983, by the mountain goats
7: "such a waste of a girl, such rumination. i am obsessive. i contain nothing but the replay. i am blood and blood and replay. i am please don't go." - i put the coffin out to sea, by lisa marie basile
8: an image of a partially bald baby bird begging for food, drawn in the desaturated greens and black of a trailcam, on top, the text reads "i am asking you for something i need", on bottom, the text reads "why is it so hard to give it to me?" - trailcam baby, by @quezify
9: "was i raised without love? / or was i born unloveable?" - @psychwarded
10: "I, in my corner, with my monstrous needs." - As Consciousness Is Harnessed to Flesh, susan sontag
11: "oh, i know that i'm not whole, and sometimes feel the flies swarming, like much of me is rotten." - roadkill ode, chad abushanab
12: a photo of a cut tree where much of the centre is rotted from fungus, accompanied by the text: "heart rot in pine. heart rot is the softening of a pine trees resinous heartwood, caused by an in-dwelling fungus. not all pines have it, but those that do make the excavation of a tree-hole next cavity easier for the red-cockaded woodpecker."
13: "rot made a home inside my body." - i know it's from "bloat" but cant find the authors name again. i think it starts with a c?
14: photo of an abandoned house in shades of brown and beige and orange, the walls are wet and scuffed and the drywall has been torn open in places, exposing the old lath. - abandoned, by @jaggedplains
15: photo of a mouldy strawberry, fading from bright red to grey-green fluff - Strawberry Gray Mold disease stock photo, by MediaProduction on gettyimages
16: "you ever feel like you were born with something rotten inside you and if people get close enough they're gonna find out" - tumblr post by @twoheadedfawnn
17: "we are meat, we are potential carcasses,' he once said. 'if i go into a butcher's shop i always think it is surprising that i wasn't there instead of the animal." - francis bacon
18: "you dangle on the leash of your own longing; your need grows teeth." - speeches for dr frankenstein, by margaret atwood
19: photo of a python hanging off a roof coiled around a black and white bird, poised to eat it - i heard some noise on the roof this morning, by candycane7 on reddit
20: "all that matters is that you want to hurt me. all that matters is that you want me." - when rome falls, by yves olade
21: "god told me i was forgiven and then he split me open" - god is made of hunger and i am made of dreams, by katie maria
22: "but this is not about love. once a pig is hung and cut straight, cut from rectum to neck, step inside her death like it is a room: that is how to touch her now. the lord said, you must not eat their meat or touch their carcasses. then came the end of the rib." - oh let's just be hogs, by gregory emilio
23: photo of a strawberry cut in half with its leaves attached. it is bright red, steel knife wet. the background is bright white and plain. - cut strawberry by liz west on flickr
24: photo of a handmade cloth sculpture of a dead autopsied pigeon, red zipper like an incision opening to its empty red interior, small cloth and thread organs arranged around it. - pandora: city pigeon, by jessica bartram
25: '"u need a therapist" actually i need to be euthanized' - tumblr post by deactivated user @122mg
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naoreco · 4 months ago
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I figure it’s worth putting on the Tumblr radar since much of this is current discussion of Niosi is happening on Twitter.
(content warnings for sexual assault, abuse, manipulation, and otherwise taking advantage of people)
On Chris Niosi, and Kyle McCarley’s defense of him:
Recently Chris Niosi (aka Kirbopher), who has admitted to abusing people around him for at least a decade, was cast in Honkai Star Rail as the character Moze. Five years have passed since his public apology, where he addresses some specific callouts from victims to debatable effect, but unfortunately he’s lied about apologizing to all of his victims (1, 2), and the specific apologies he has written are now deleted from his tumblr, calling his efforts into changing for the better into his question. Furthermore, as he has a history of taking advantage of his fans even in his more underground days (1+2, 3), putting him in a situation where he has access to more fans to put him on a pedestal is dangerous. Other users have iterated much of this already on tumblr, where it was already discussed in previous years, so this is just some context.
But I’m here to talk about something related that hasn’t gotten any Tumblr coverage. For example, people here have talked about Griffin Puatu’s reddit post defending him already. But nobody has mentioned Kyle McCarley defending him yet.
On July 19, 2024, in the replies of Moze’s introduction tweet, he had this to say:
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He addresses his use of “bad boyfriend” downplaying legitimate abuse later. I don't think it's great but we’ll get to that. However, “the court of public opinion” is a concept that he does stand by, perhaps reinforced by the backlash he received for this. Some of this was vitriolic, given the kind of person he was defending from further criticism, but others did try to reason with him, including some of the above and more as evidence that Niosi isn’t being entirely truthful about his atonement, and overall most responses expressed disbelief and disappointment more than anything else.
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Still, he deactivated his account the following day, on July 20, 2024.
Unfortunately, our story doesn’t end there. In the early morning of July 21, 2024, he made an announcement in his Discord server.
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So here's the thing about Niosi not being a confirmed sexual abuser or rapist or pedophile. I don't have everything, with this being such an expansive case so this is off what I've found. You know the time he planned to take advantage of his girlfriend at the time while said girlfriend was intoxicated (plus this follow-up where he attempted to cover for himself)? Drunk people cannot consent, especially not when drunk sex is already a hard boundary. Although this technically doesn't make him a rapist, to my knowledge, if you're gonna argue semantics it'll just sound like "well he didn't ACTUALLY rape someone so it's not as bad". Is it not already terrible that he tried to and still downplayed it when called on it? Besides, as mentioned in Lighty's testimony linked above, he's let other in his sphere groom minors under his watchful eye, and his other ex Audrey had things to say about how he weaponized sexual favors too. If someone actually has more on a history of sexual abuse and pedophilia, though, please bring it to my attention. I'll add it to this post.
Either way, we don't know what he knows. At best, Kyle has a very incomplete picture of the situation, and at worst he does have a complete picture and he just doesn’t think it’s valid or up-to-date criticism. The person who first brought this to people's attention on Twitter also mentioned that her messages in the server were being deleted when she spoke up to provide evidence, so for someone who welcomes others to share evidence how open he actually is to it is questionable. (UPDATE: There's more to this part of the story but we'll get to it in a future update.) His final message a couple of hours from these just solidifies it.
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Having joined the server myself to see, around the time of the announcements seems to have been scrubbed clean, but there is some current discussion of the topic as of this post. Furthermore, someone there has stated that they're compiling sources to send his way to give him a better understanding of the situation (even if they're not sure if he still wants to talk about this), so maybe this will finally get him to reconsider his stance! Only time will tell.
Overall, though, I stand by my point that if Niosi makes a living, it should be somewhere far away from the public eye. Don't give him a platform to find new fans to take advantage of. Don't give his victims the opportunity to be retraumatized whenever they start a new game of show. He's been given more than enough chances. It's time to turn over a new leaf instead of digging his heels into the ground.
Still, I don't know if Kyle will change his mind at this point. I want him to - I tried, back when his Twitter was still up - but even at this stage he's doubled down on a situation he knows he might not have the full story on and I'm not sure if I can trust that. For any other fans, give this some thought - keep an eye out for any future developments if you still want to have faith in him, move on from him if you can't stand it. I just want him to at least hold his friend accountable instead of trying to shield him from the lasting consequences of his own actions.
(I'll be linking future updates here: #1, #2 and #3 for now.)
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thisismeracing · 2 years ago
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Ex | MS47
SOCIAL MEDIA AU
Pairing: black!singer!reader (she/her) x mick schumacher
Warnings: curse words, Twitter environment, breakup, mention of food, pregnancy, it's not proofread, etc etc. Minors DNI!
summary: Y/n and Mick used to be the golden couple in the paddock, that's why the internet went wild when they announced their breakup. Imagine how they reacted when Y/n dropped a song about not wanting to be his ex. Would the couple have any hope in getting back together?
a/n: none of the pictures used are mine, they are all from Pinterest and other apps. everything else is made up by me and I do not give permission for it to be published on a different platform. I would appreciate it if those things could be taken into consideration 💛
my masterlist | my taglist
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liked by dualipa, mercedesamgf1, and others
yourusername New song is out 🖤 Hope you guys like it!
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schumicedes This feels like such a personal song, it gave me chills!
⤷ yn1990 It's like she recorded a voice message for him and then dropped it as a song.
f1sainzito I still can't believe they broke up, I'm still mourning their relationship
⤷ charleslechair1 I bet they will get back after this song lol
ynprincess I love her but this cover feels so...weird, idk, like it's rushed
⤷ mickeyn someone made a thread on twitter explaining it a bit, but it's basically a picture mick took of her, she wanted to make her message clear and that's why it's so artistically beautiful, it goes beyond the aesthetic
jorjasmith you’re so brave and pure, Ily!❤️❤️
winteryn Yn wanting to be friends with her ex, meanwhile I literally changed cities so I wouldn't see mine again
⤷ cruelsummer1 that's why I feel like they like gave themselves time, not really broke up fr, and now they realize it was not the best idea because they literally love each other.
dojacat Don't make me miss my ex, yn!!!! ☠️
woffantastic NOT THE MERCEDES ADMIN LIKING IT
mickschumacher
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mickschumacher ⛰️
comments on tihs post have been limited
ynandschumi I wanted to comment something but I just know it will be deleted, so I'm just gonna say: you guys look good, hope you enjoyed your hike!❤️ also Angie seems a bit sad without her mother doesn't she....................
⤷ mercedessummer bestie, you did not LMAO
lewishamilton Roscoe says he's mad he was not invited!
mickschum90 I love you, mick!
sunandstarsyn This does not give happiness vibe...
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dailycelebsupdate
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dailycelebsupdate We woke up this morning to the leaking of Y/n Y/l/n’s baby shower. The singer spent a little over a year off the radar after her breakup with F1 star Mick Schumacher, only to show up now pregnant! Who are we betting on to be the baby daddy?
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ynlove we aint betting a thing, and stop saying “only to show up” as if these pics were posted intently, they were LEAKED. Respect Y/n’s right to her privacy!
sainzsunny I hated the fact that the leaked something that she did not want people to know, but my bet would be that she and Mick are back together since that song release 🤐
mickeyf1 You guys are disgusting
swiftieyln She lookes so peaceful, glowing and everything 😭
⤷ ynhundreds that because she was being able to keep her private life to herself.
f1gossipupdates
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f1gossipupdates Is everyone thinking the same thing?
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schumacher47 Is leaking season? Wtf the wrong, why cant celebs have their privacy??
⤷ f1khalid especially Mick, he’s really open about how he likes to have his personal life respected. 😔
ynstars BABY SCHUMACHER ON ITS WAY!!!
hockeyf1d They MARRIED???!!!
ynbrasil I just know Yn will be pissed when she open her socials to this shitshow
yourusername and mickschumacher
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yourusername It's been a long ride and we wanted to share with you guys in a different way, the circumstances, however, did not help, so we are sticking to the good ol' Instagram announcement. We got married last year and decided to keep living in our particular heaven, I hope you guys don't get this the wrong way because we love the love and support some of you give us, but Mick and I needed to bask in our own love without interruptions or assumptions. This love grew bigger than us and it will be walking around the world in a couple of months. We appreciate our friends' discretion, and our fans' love, we see you and we love you. We hope you guys can respect our privacy and our wishes on keeping some details to ourselves. Love, Mick and Yn Schumacher
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ynweeknd SHE SIGNED AS YN SCHUMACHER OMGGGGG
schumickeyf1 "This love grew bigger than us and it will be walking around the world in a couple of months" PLEASE IM SO LONELY THIS IS A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF ROMANTIC
mickschumacher Forever, mrs. Schumacher ❤️
⤷ yourusername forever and some more, my love 💗
charles_leclerc omg thank goodness you guys told everyone, I was so scared I would let it slip
⤷ lechair16 Charles ☠️☠️ LMAO
lewishamilton you guys deserve all the happiness in this world 🤍
ynandmick I was right and nature is healing
twentyoneyns So let me get this clear, my ex gives me a reason to go to therapy, while Y/n's ex gives her a ring, then all the love and orgasms in the world, and then a baby??????????? God definitely has its favorites.
⤷ schumercedes not the orgasms 🗣🗣 HAHAHAHAHAH
ynandmickey MOTHER AND FATHER
⤷ popyn Literally
mercedesamgf1 We already have a spot for them 💜
sunnydaysyln Are we calling the baby schumini or minimacher? or baby schumi? or macherbaby?
⤷ yourusername HAHAHAHHA I love them all
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If you liked it, make sure to like and reblog <3 feel free to talk to me as well, my inbox is always open!
I will start a taglist on my posts, to be part of it you just gotta comment/send an ask saying so, and most important: have your age in your profile (I don’t interact with minors!). See you guys next story! <3
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cursedmagician · 1 month ago
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so. let's talk about that episode shall we?
major ii 17 spoilers under the cut, and lots of theories. read at your own risk.
divider by strangergraphics ✮⋆˙
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I have no idea what to even think about that episode. I watched this at about 8 in the morning my time, and now I am in shambles and have been for the last several hours. I'm going to dump all my theories in this one blog post.
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my first topic, and the elephant in the room - THIS IS NOT THE LAST ACT. NO WAY.
I've seen people asking if this is the last act and therefore the last ever episode in the series, and to that I say... obviously not. there's still so many plot points to be resolved.
like, for example, why would they add in a scene of the prime shimmers going to the contestant grounds if they weren't going to do something for it later?
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yes I know that they were already used as merely a small plot device to allow the episode to progress, but when you think of it in the grand scheme of things there must be something more to it.
also, and - I may be going crazy here - but there might possibly be some sort of parallel of when cobs tells mephone to go "home" with him. we now know that all those previous theories of mephone being made with the shimmer egg are correct, because of fan. since that is the case, I feel like it would make sense for mephone's true home to be with the prime shimmer, right?
I feel like this could be a plot point in the next act. mephone feels more at home with the prime shimmer than he does with cobs (obviously). he would meet them and realise he feels strangely connected to them, and then he figures everything out which leads up to him discovering his true family. and I hope cobs rots and dies FOREVERRR
another point to add onto this is that remember how soap and mic took that photo together in the last episode?
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well, soap was going through her recently deleted.
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on apple (and I'm assuming meeple as well) devices, it takes 30 days for photos in the recently deleted photo to be fully erased from the device. before that, you can restore and fully erase as many photos as you like.
at the end of this episode when everything created by melife has been erased, baxter is seen walking up to soap's phone here.
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in a scene where everything is gone, don't you think this is weirdly symbolic? they didn't have any other reason to show this which leads up to the next theory.
mephone is most likely going to find a way to bring everyone back through some way, and it might be through this system. I'm not saying I know how he's gonna do it, but this will totally be some sort of factor in the next act. hopefully.
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second topic - what about bow and bot?
and I know what you all are thinking. I know that bow is definitely not gone, since she obviously isn't supported by melife anymore. (I'm a little curious, bow mentioned that she can't escape the confines of purgatory mansion, but since now that's been deleted, would she be able to roam free? just a thought...)
the same could be said for bot, since they were made by fan and test tube and not by melife. but there's been some speculation going around saying that since bot was made out of materials from test tube's lab, they would be deleted too right?
I actually think that's not necessarily the case.
we have no idea if test tube's materials or her lab was made out of things generated by melife. for all we know, she could have ordered the mechanical parts from overseas. she could have dug up the space she needed for the lab herself.
all we know is that the locations made for the game itself are generated by melife. however, test tube's lab has really nothing to do with the contest because it is its own thing.
so I think this entire theory is genuinely plausible. bot might still be out there somewhere, and I'm not going to say on the invitational island because we don't know if that entire thing was deleted too or just the floor's face. they genuinely might be making their way over to the season 2 grounds right now, wondering what is going on.
which could possibly make way for a bow and bot meeting, AND they might team up too to save the day!! that definitely feels like a direction that adam would be going for, and I personally would totally stand for it.
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third topic - can mephone X be avoided or stopped somehow?
here's what I'm thinking.
lightbulb actually managed to dodge mephone X here, and even though yes she did get got in the end, you can at least delay the process or maybe even outrun them altogether.
there must be a reason as to why only the person who is being targeted can see mephone X, but that's a theory for another day.
now, this part is less of a theory and more of an idea - that is supported by numerous twitter posts - but what if you are able to see mephone X with another me device thingy?
think about it, what if taking a picture or just going through the camera app enables others to see them, therefore allowing the contestants to potentially disable mephone X for good?
assuming my theory is correct and they do come back somehow, I doubt that adam forgot about this plothole completely. there must be more significance to this in the future.
we all know how the main writing team writes. they think of everything, down to the small details, and the reference previous things that were thought to be insignificant before!! reminds me of bfdi in a way.
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fourth topic - misc stuff/yapping
and well of course I had to dedicate an entire section to just my yapping alone. I know I'm still pretty new to blogging, I don't have many posts yet, but I think it's worth it to just leave my thoughts out here for people to cry over also.
firstly... OJ and paper's last conversation was an argument. lol!! XD!! also it was so funny as to how paper got so ticked off after salt said OJ is her boyfriend. I understand that he might have still felt pretty heated after everything that had been going on, + the argument they had earlier. and I know that OJ is very important to paper. but I still think it was really hilarious. some could say jealous. "he's not your boyfriend he was MINE!!"
ALSO!!! also also also THIS fucking scene...
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this is gonna haunt me for the rest of my life man. what the fuck. imagine if slasher movies were like this... like jigsaw or something. if I saw this in a slasher movie I would be terrified for my LIFE (something these contestants don't have).
I really really liked the scene where paintbrush was crying over lightbulb btw. jazzy did an amazing job at that, and they said that they didn't even cry to be able to voice it!! she's a very talented va, I aspire to be like her someday...
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another thing I wanted to mention is this tweet made by brian a while ago (screenshot I nabbed from me_phone4 on twitter) yes this is absolutely going to be for inanimate insanity. no questions asked. hope is on the horizon guys.
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ok I think that is the end of this post. likes and reblogs are appreciated, and also reblog if you want to add onto my theories later!
for now, signing off!! - CURSED MAGICIAN
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gigidragonbbxxx · 9 months ago
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The Dark Side of Loass + motivation
I was on my daily reddit scroll while sipping my morning coffee when I saw something extremely disgusting on my homepage.
It was a manifestation success story by a man who claimed to have manifested his "perfect" gf - the kicker? She's underaged and he is a fully grown man.
The post has been deleted but the original poster's account is still up, as is his comment history. In his comments he details how he essentially used SATS and shot a message to someone he saw in discord. Apparently she is 15, lives with him due to an abusive situation, and yes they are s******y active. Apparently he treats her very well (he even mentioned bringing her to school YUCK) and buys her a lot of stuff and she's happy.
Let me make this clear:
a girl in an abusive home situation is not "saved" by an adult man taking advantage of it in the guise of "improving" her life situation while subjecting her to doing physical things she cannot consent to because she is not a damn adult.
I did some digging and it was not very long until I saw his first-ever comment about it and it was worse than I thought. I was trying to give the benefit of the doubt like maybe he visualized for a perfect gf and he didn't know she was a minor. Well, that says more about me than anything bc yes I found out that he had specified that he wanted her underaged. He literally says in the comment "specifcs that could get me in trouble". He made a lot of comments about her body, etc. and quite literally said something along the lines of "I'm her savior and shes my obsessed loving gf". Keep in mind...one of the titles this man used (he posted twice in diff subreddits) was "I manifested a s** s****e". So. Yup. He's a whole p*do.
I will not be sharing links as I don't want to give that horrible man any more traction but if you read all that and said to yourself, but Gigi whats that got to do with the dark side of the law of assumption? and why would you say there's a dark side to it?
The truth is that the law isn't dark at all, the evil part of the law is the people who use it for evil.
This is why good things can happen to horrible people.
This is why you see villains win.
They may have an amazing self-concept OR they just are under the assumption that NO MATTER HOW HORRIBLE THEY ARE THEY GET WHAT THEY WANT EVEN IF ITS FUCKED UP AND MORALLY TWISTED.
It's why you see nepo babies who aren't talented get shit handed to them - THEY EXPECT IT BECAUSE OF WHAT? WHO. THEY. ARE. SO CHANGE YOUR INNER SELF. EMBODY THAT CONFIDENCE.
This is why I wanted to share that story with you, it is to motivate you: if you know you're a better person than that horrible man, WHY CAN'T YOU HAVE EVERYTHING YOU WANT TOO?
Shouldn't you deserve even more for being good?
Stop thinking you don't deserve things bc guess what? People who are genuinely criminals are out here manifesting - so stay on your zoom and FOCUS. SATURATE. DISCIPLINE. COMMIT.
and let's all collectively agree to pray for that girl. I'm honestly gonna affirm that she gets saved and ends up in a situation where she is protected, loved, and away from predators.
Do not let evil win. Use it to remind yourself that the law is about BELIEF not FEELING.
with a heavy heart, xx, gigi
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dangermousie · 1 month ago
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Their chemistry is gorgeous...
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And the way he makes a little jokes and then realizes that it's not really a joke to him aaaaaaa
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It's like they know how to hit all my shippy kinks dead center so hard they are ringing.
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And then he stands (without his cloak - he gave it to her!) in front of the cave opening to shield her even if it's by a tiny amount from the cold. He is there until morning!!!
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I really liked the first six eps of this drama but with ep 7, that switch - that unpredictable glorious switch - flipped and I am invested and obsessed. It's glorious.
It is a very romantic wuxia in the best ways (and my very first cdrama was the 2006 adaptation of Return of Condor Heroes and you can't get more ur romantic wuxia than that - and it was the reason I got into cdramas - so it's clearly something I crave.)
The thing I love so much here is how competent and adult and decent both the protagonists are. She is sharp-tongued and prickly but deeply good and he is just so...he is arguably the deadliest fighter in that narrative but he is so completely gentle. The way only someone who is very secure in himself and in his strength can be - he doesn't need to prove anything to anyone. He has his (serious) trauma/regrets/damage but insecurity is not one of his issues. And it is just perfect.
I think ZSX has never portrayed a bastard in any way that worked for me (tho to be fair, those dramas were so bad, nobody could have saved that - his new agency is so much better omg, anyway) but he is a rare actor who can portray sheer unadulterated decency and make it fascinating instead of boring.
And Li Qin is just so adult. She is an adult woman; all her best roles take advantage of her stillness and her ability to portray calm, intense competency (that is why that terrible drama with RJL that shall not be named was so bad - it was bad in general but it also went against every one of her strengths; perhaps someone like GXT could have made it bearable.)
This is a solidly written, beautifully filmed drama in a genre I love that plays to its stars' strengths. What's not to love.
ETA: I was gonna make a whole separate post about him carrying her when she faints, trudging thru the snow, trying to breathe on her cold hands and shielding her as they fall but I accidentally deleted them and don't feel like redoing it so just imagine it instead.
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romana-after-dark · 1 year ago
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Tell Me (Repost)
Dark!Miguel O'hara x fem!reader
Masterlist : Taglist
I posted this months ago and by the morning it only had like 6 likes by the morning lmfao and this was during the peak of Miguel days and I thought "wow this must be terrible" so I deleted it. However, it did well on AO3 so i decided to just report it.
Miguel tries to extract information from you via any means necessary DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT
OH MY GOD DO NOT EAT IF YOU DONT LIKE DEAD DOVES
This is not like The Wrong Way where Joel alternates between horrific and soft. THIS IS JUST PLAIN DDDNE.
WARNINGS!!!!: DDDNE!!! Rape, non con, torture, verbal humiliation, degradation, forced anal, biting (fang baby), literally idk what got into me here, it's literally porn with no plot. I almost always have so much plot. Victim blaming, psychological torture, I want to reiterate its literally rape. I wanted to write for Miguel bc he's a hottie and spiderverse was amazing but lets be honest, its pretty popular on tumblr rn. However, I refuse to write without inspiration, so I won't just write something just bc it's popular. Besides, this may have gotten so far on the dark side it's not even gonna be liked XD anyway, i had genuine inspiration and I went with it. All apoligies.
700 words
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“Tell me.” Miguel O’hera grabbed your throat as you hung from the ceiling. He had been trying for hours to extract the information he wanted, using multiple forms of torture and you were exhausted, but refused to tell him what he wanted. When his hands began trailing your body, you knew the next method would be psycho-sexual.
“I’m not…” You gasp as a finger grazes over your tit. “I’m not telling you anything…”
“Hm.” was his non committal answer before cutting your ropes, watching you tumble onto the concrete. “I guess we’ll see.”
Only taking a moment to breath, you try to scramble away, but to where you aren’t sure. There’s nowhere to go, and a large man climbs on top of you hold your wrists together in on fist as his other undid his pants. You writhe underneath him, but screaming is useless.
“Get off me!” You kick and twist and scrape up your whole body that's exposed in the bra and underwear you were left hanging in, the cold floor ice against your skin. “GET OFF!”
“Oh, I’ll get off alright…” Miguel mumbles as he rips your bra off. “Tell me what I want to know, and I’ll stop.”
You weren’t sure you believed him, but you didn’t want to give up the information. Even as he strips off his pants, his insanely large frame keeps you pinned to the floor. There is no escape.
Miguel mumbles and scoffed ‘fine’ and two hands rip off your underwear, tossing the scraps aside. You scream as he pushes his fat tip into you, ripping you open slowly, slowly… allowing you to feel every inch, every vain, every hard and warm and pulsing part of him. “You can still stop this, carino.”
“No!” You whimper, deadset and determined to stay strong. You wouldn’t let him break you.
“Have it your way.” Dragging his hips back, Miguel pauses before he thrusted into you band fucks you mercilessly, you can feel the raw pain of him sliding in and out of you as you cry out, initially dry. The most humiliating part, however, came after several minutes of hm trying to coax the information out of you, slapping your face until your mouth bled, when he began laughing. “Oh my god, are you getting wet from this? So fucking pathetic.” 
Miguel looked down on you, your body wracked with pain and jolting with each thrust, he could practically feel your will breaking. “You probably enjoy this, do you play out scenarios like this with some pathetic little dicked man? Does it turn you on, knowing you have no choice? Little whore been fucked so many times she needs to feel like she’s being forced just to get wet?” His chuckle was dark and cruel as he continued to taunt you, your tears falling down your bloodied and bruised face. 
“You’re lucky I’m even touching this used up cunt.” Miguel leans over, licking at the tears and blood and spit on your face. “Tell me, and I’ll stop fucking your pussy. TELL ME!” He screams, painfully loud in your ear.
You break, telling him what he wanted. There wasn’t a part of you that really believed he’d stop, so you were surprised when he pulled out.
When he rolled you over, you began to ask. “What are you-” but are cut off by him ramming his cock up your ass. “FUCK!!!” You scream. He wasn’t lying, he did stop abusing your pussy, only to rip our asshole open.
“God, look at you…” Miquel sat back to admire his work, smirking at the way your ass contracted and spread around his thick cock. “I’d say you were made for me, but…” Chuckling, he slaps your ass. “But I can see how much you’re struggling to make room for me. No ones ever fucked you like this, have they? You should be thanking me.” Fangs dug sharply into your shoulder, drawing out more blood. “SAY THANK YOU!” Your ears rang with his screamed words, before another bite. “SAY IT!” He bit and screamed and bit and screamed until you finally cave.
“Thank you!” You sob, and he cums inside your ass with a loud, strangled groan.
Only when you shudder from the cold do you realize he’s gotten off you, his impossibly wide frame no longer covering you. Miguel tosses you a blanket, muttering something about how he may just have to keep you now.
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Eeeeeep well if you like it, please consider rebloging or leaving a comment!
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nikaizkool · 1 year ago
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Manipulative bf feral boys + sweater duo + partners in slime
•dream
Never let’s you go out. Basically traps you but since George and sapnap are living with you two you aren’t lonely
Cooks for you buys you shit but never under any circumstance would he let you go out with a guy friend “no you can go out you’ll probably just cheat on me and the fact you’d cheat on me after everything I’ve done for you is sickening”
• Sapnap
Not that manipulative just like an angry dad when your out past your curfew “babe come home now.” When you came back home he’d be very distant and sad guilt tripping you into apologizing and staying home with him
You’d break up and get together on and off very annoying
Sex lots of it he just seems like the kind of guy to have breakup sex so ▪️🦇🕴️
• George
When he wants to do something you say no to “if you love me you’d do it” if you wanna do something he dosent want to “you need to stop being selfish and be more considerate of my needs.”
Bend you over—sick fuck who likes to quick fuck. Very needy when your talking with your friends “babe can you do this dishes it’s your turn”
• Charlie
- I can’t see him really being manipulative or possessive but I feel like if he were he’d only keep you to himself.
“Oh I didn’t know you were going out tonight I was gonna surprise you with a date—but it’s alright—it’s just I really was looking forward to some alone time, I just feel like you have been going out a lot—I feel like your distancing yourself from me.”
-definitely very clingy hugs from behind in public
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Whispering stuff in your ear around your friends “your mine my love”
-does anything to prevent you from leaving, party’s, sex, dinner, dates, anything. If you both went out together he’ll be very protective and make you leave early. Very subtle stuff
•schlatt
-definitely like very possessive distracting you from your friends making him your only worry
- giving you everything you want, flowers, candy, blankets, anything to distract you from everything else “can you stall stream while I cook babe?”
- when you plan to leave he becomes all hot n sexy he starts feeling romantical, starts kissing your neck bear hugging you all that good stuff “but baby your not really gonna leave me here like this are you? Your friends can wait”
- progressively becomes more demanding through the relationship “what do you mean ‘can I go out’ no the fuck—we’re watching a movie babe” he’d hide your phone for a couple days then “find” it.
•Wilbur
Puppy eyes all the time, “but my darling we were supposed to hang out today it’s, date night” never lets you go anywhere except the mall and if you do it can only be with him. He monitors everything you do.
“Where were you last night my dear? I didn’t see you this morning?” Constantly bombarding you with questions about your whereabouts. “I was on life 360 and say you were out with f/n. I told you to stop hanging out with them—they aren’t a good influence”
Strict but gentle dad energy all the way “darling may I see your phone I gotta look something up” looks through all your texts ruins your friendships with people who say you and wils relationship is toxic the deletes texts he sent.
Reloads your social media every 5 seconds when your out if you post a dance on TikTok hed create multiple accounts saying your ugly till you delete the video afterwards hed Comfort you.
•Quackity
Very subtle “babe I have to go—“ he wrap his arms around you whining till you give in
When you go out together and he sees you eyeing someone he’d whisper to you “Your only mine-yeah?”
After you’d get home he’d guilt you “you don’t fucking love me anymore do you? I loved you Y/n I really did I can’t believe you.”
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