#no sorry i cant coexist with others

[scentofpines]

i love summer but my god people are so fucking annoying, i cant wait for autumn when they will crawl back into the holes they came from and i can be outside in peace again (albeit freezing my ass off)

[mbat]

jews: this thing in fiction feels jew coded to me, this character/group has several parallels to jewish people and i see myself here :)

non-jews: nah, that aint right, its clearly coded to be this other thing/youre stretching so hard to find a connection that isnt there

jews: this thing in fiction falls into antisemitic tropes, this character/group has several common antisemitic tropes that have a long history of being used against my people, and i think we should really consider not using these tropes anymore/consider if theres a better way to go about making the same point without doing it in this specific way

non-jews: nah, that aint right, its clearly coded to be this other thing/youre stretching so hard to find a connection that isnt there

just something ive noticed

[mcybree]

rewatching jimmy’s last life pov to ground myself in what his character actually is so I dont let my horrible skewed visions win

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

[just-your-average-tangerine]

The advice that "if you just be yourself the right people will like you" is a fucking joke. The only times in my life that I've ever had friends was when I was putting an exhausting and unsustainable amount of effort into pretending to be someone I'm not. And frankly, I'm tired of it. But while you assholes were busy discoursing about whether autism is really a disability or not, or if it's a privileged status. I was actually living with it, and it turns out the "can't form close bonds with others" disorder does, in fact, make it impossible for me to form close bonds with others.

[chocymilksailor]

being fictionkin and also being semi active in fandom hobbies (mostly things thatre either general art related and/or things that end up directly related to my kintypes LMFAO) feels like i end up isolating myself from like a good chunk of ppl if i dont overly stress myself out to fit the discussions ppl be having HURHRBFHFHH

[calp0sa]

you are genuinely such a cool freaking person whenever i see your art i get super happy... i Love the way you draw limbs and eyes especially. it just feels Nostalgic in a way. if that makes sense? i feel like if i ate your art it would taste like sourdough bread which i loove sourdough its so yummy. your art would be yummy

not to mention you are just isnanely nice?? like i wish i could be as nice as you but i am such an angry person that i cant. i aspire to be like you one day truly and i hope you know that you are a wonderful person and a wonderful artist

well you have delivered a sourdough loaf of friendliness. which is great, i like sourdough with some olive oil.

but the second paragraph in particular really hit me when i saw it yesterday. like i had to think about it for a hot minute.

i hope it serves as any sort of reassurance that i struggle with anger management as well. i’ve struggled with it all my life. it took me a very long time to learn self control, and i still struggle to control myself sometimes. but i think what helped me coexist with this issue is allowing myself to be understood by, well, myself. because when you have a problem like this, it’s not really in your control. and it’s never shallow. it will always be deeply rooted in something. and that’s what you need to understand. anger comes from fear and pain. you cannot blame yourself for being hurt and afraid. when you feel angry, that is you trying to protect yourself, because you are scared. and when you grow up in traumatic circumstances, this anger will feel so much bigger than you. you’ll always instinctually want to protect yourself, because you’ve been hurt so drastically, you don’t want it to happen again. this isn’t your fault. you are just a human person. shunning yourself for things you can’t control will result in self resentment, which will make you angrier… because you don’t understand yourself... i’ve adopted the sentiment of telling myself “because you are a person” every time i question any strong emotions i feel. humans are the most emotionally complex creatures on this planet. do not boil yourself down to anger, that won’t help you heal at all. and obviously anger can’t prevent you from having kindness in your heart. hell, you took time out of your day to be kind to me! you also saw kindness within me, another person. the beauties you see in this world are a reflection of what you are capable of becoming, and that’s a whole other can of existential worms that would require 7 extra paragraphs to elaborate on. sorry if this was nonsensical it was kind of emotional for me haha. we’re all sensitive people and that’s fine. you’re fine. a vulnerable soul is a strong soul. we’re gonna be fine

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hey miss raven! How are you? Recently i read trey story event card Al'ab Nariya. They are discussing about flames reaction from mixing gunpowder with various metals causing coloured flames in fireworks. Trey said because magic is not common among people, humans relying on science on other thing. Does that mean magic and science coexist together in twst world? How about technology development does that involved colab on magitek and science? Like the magiwheel. They are magitek but does science also involved in the development? Then we have the infamous STYX organization on their research on blot. From what we see, they have more advanced technology than what the general public have. Like the flying cars, the building itself and ortho new gear clearly they combine magitek and science to help their research with blot. Trey also implied that science club also researched on science competition. We all know NRC is magic academy but do they also learn about science? Then does NRC has science in their curriculum like biology, physics and chemistry? A lot of question still inside my brain i cant say more about it 😅 sorry it's turning into a wall of text i just can't get that off! I hope you have a great day! Cheers!

As I’ve theorized in this post, the basis for Twisted Wonderland’s society is the mundane, not the magical. Most of society operates without magic, and that extends to schooling and jobs. Since most people don’t have the capacity for magic, most schools teach normal subjects and those students go on to acquire normal occupations. Magic exists on its own (potions, magic mirrors), non-magic exists on its own (traditional medicine, cellphones), AND a mix of the two exists (healing potions, looking mirrors).

There are many instances within TWST when characters will make reference to “normal” things, such as Trey talking about chemistry and elements from the periodic table in the Silk Adorned vignette (already mentioned by anon). Azul and Deuce frequently mention mathematics or doing arithmetic (usually in regards to money), so non-magical math is implied. Topics like biology and physics are also either directly stated or alluded to. Crewel is even stated to lead the “Science” department at NRC. I would imagine that, similar to theory before application, NRC students need to know these non-magical subjects before combining them in practice with magic.

The same probably applies for the development of inventions that incorporate magical and non-magical elements; there would have to at least be mages trained in the non-magical variant of whatever field they’re in in order to safely and ethically incorporate magic into new medicine or technology. STYX for example is stated to recruit people with low magical reserves, so they are not proficient mages despite having access to crazy tech. Those employees must have hard and technical skills to make them competent researchers of blot.

[salad-o-malley]

I think im gonna need to Hide Tumblr from myself, Before I get a weekly streak of absuing the ask button!...Haha, I've honestly gotten curious way to curious and I know curiosity killed the cat but maybe im more of a dog? Lol, your Ocs are just all so lovely and make me wanna beg like a Victorian child in need of food. I just can't get enough of them. You're amazing at character design! And that had me wondering if you've ever considered getting into writing? From one of your newer but still old videos, you mentioned that you're oc world lives rent-free in your head, and that made me relate to you alot my world is always getting built in my head and one I started written my Ocs storys not in a lore format but more in a story way as if i was writing a book it just seemed to help me place everything together and was curious if you tried or do write storys with you're ocs while most people on here dont like reading Oc stuff if you did ever write something and shared it on here id jump to be the first to read it. (My apologies for all the asks I spend to much time on here...haha.) As an Oc ask im way to invested in learning your Ocs lore well more like world lore from that one video I mentioned earlier Id always been way to eager to know more about the complicated Oc universe so as an actual ask to not waste your time hows Seren's universe set up hes an Incubus/Succubus so that must mean his universe has some sort of hell given he's friends with Rouge (From your pinterest post I think Seren being a sore loser is hilarious.) And from your All of my god ocs plus any one who Relevent video Alodias and Celeste are the first incubus and Angel made so does that mean the god ocs are connected to Serens universe and seeing from the fact Fern and Seren play with there kids dolls and are friends and fern and her husband are hybrids? (Ferns a bunny?...and her husbands a Wolf.) it just makes me curious because that means the universe is filled with alsorts of creatures and then if the god ocs are connected to it, it just seems like a very interesting world and seems very creative and I love it! (Sorry for such a long post...I cant help but abuse the ask button, ill try my best to keep in check!)

-🪼

OH BOY OH BOY OKAY

So i’m gonna try to make this as simple as I can manage to

basicallyyyy I have different oc universes that all kind of coexist at the same time next to each other while being separate from one another

I’ve categorized them in my head kind of like this;

- god realms (not technically a universe but the gods and all the creatures in their realms know of and can interact with all the other universes)

- serenverse (unofficial name lol): basically just base level stuff, kind of just regular earth with more mystical creatures in it (like succubi/incubi, hybrids, etc) this is the universe most of my ocs kind of get automatically shuffled into if they don’t fit into the specific niche of my other universes in my brain ☝️

- fantasy universe: the universe where all the damn whimsy is. Kings, queens, princes, princesses, mystical/magical creatures are entirely the norm, it’s not like regular earth at all- it’s completely disconnected from anything like that. This is where my ocs like Sephtis, Carlin, Cassiopeia, Lunarus, Reef, Ezekiel, Pluto, Florian etc would be! This is also the universe where *my* gods are the most known, widely accepted, and worshipped!1

- Apocalypse universe: the universe that’s closest to being like our world buuut if everything went to shit because a war machine ruined it all. I made this universe specifically for Khaos and Tigre lmao

now getting into god stuff!1 my gods exist everywhere all the time in allllll the universes regardless if the people in those universes know of them or not

for example, in serenverse, the gods are mostly seen as mythology (like how we’d view the greek gods) though some people do know of/believe in them! The reason for creatures like incubi and angels existing there is because some of the ones born in the gods realms just migrated down there and reproduced annnd there ya go. the timing of that happening would’ve been like millions of years ago so it’s already kind of a norm in that society I suppose

while in apocalypse verse nooone of that “exists”it’s literally just a parallel of our world

BUT in my favorite universe, fantasy, the gods are veryyyy very real to the people there!1

this is gonna get even more confusing I apologize but here we go

each of the major gods has their own realm and creatures that they made to inhabit them-

likee

keveah - incubi/succubi

fallon - angels

keres - fire demons?1?

rosalite - cherubs

Lyrastra - literally every living thing on earth + some magical creatures on certain versions of earth

reaper - he didn’t make anything he’s literally death. though most people’s souls reside in his realm!

anywhozies all of the gods realms are like their own mini universes where they and their creations live! They’re all unique and kind of like their own little towns and cities in there.. I have pinterest boards for their realm inspo but I don’t feel like getting into ALL THAT

okay okay moving on. Specific ocs of mine were born in those realms, like rouge, and have the ability to traverse between realms and certain universes as they please because of that!

in the case of incubi and angels,, angels are never born on any version of earth! They’re always born in fallon’s realm no matter what, so there isn’t really such a thing as an angel born on earth (same goes for cherubs and fire demons.. basically any other creature that isn’t an incubus)

buuut incubi and succubi, because of their nature, are doing whatever the fuck and reproducing willy nilly wherever. So! There’s terms for incubi/succubi born in keveah’s realm versus earth- which would be

born in keveah’s realm; sin born

born on earth; earth born (self explanatory)

sin born incubi and succubi can go from the god realms to earth (whichever version) as they please but earth born incubi/succubi *can’t* because they were born on earth so they don’t have that power!1 whoopee!!2

annnd unfortunately seren happens to be earth born (he’s literally half human) so he can’t do any of the special stuff like that. Rouge just has like.. multiple clubs spanning keveah’s realm and the serenverse because I thought it would be silly lol

anyways that got terribly ramble-y and idk if it made a lot of sense but yeah!!2!? lore kind of?? uh!!! there’s definitely more to this but I need to stop rambling good god

[darishima]

BONESY BONESY HIII BONESY

remembwr when i said this

i am home now!!!! here is a pic of both shelves

its a little messy n not well lit.. shelves are a little disorganized too especially the bottom two but its fiine ! lucky star shelf i showed you before is third down on the left. im gonna take better pictures to post here and on mfc once my sega power figure comes in and i move my toga and midari sections around

basic explanation, starting from the top on the left shelf: -combination toga and midari section, with my full ohshc manga set in the back -jiro section, with all my mha manga -lucky star section <333 -misc section, largely demon slayer, w assorted manga -another misc section, kinda where i stuck my least favorite figures LMAO im sorry guys right shelf: -mostly one piece section, partially disgaea section -yamato shrine plus kakegurui section runoff -mainly my edward shrine plus funkos lined up along my tokyo ghoul + tg:re manga sets, but my NSO section is slowly growing. plus miku -hxh section! mostly meruem, komugi, and neferpitou- theyre my 3 favs. couple misc figures next to them too -red box on the right of the lowest shelf is where i stash all my weed LMFAO isnt it a genius spot.. nobody would ever look or suspect. im soo smart.. anyway rest of that is misc manga and its kinda cluttered just pretend you dont see that

speaking of midari and toga sections! here are closeups of both !

midari section is currently cramped and messy.. usually has kakegurui manga behind it (hence the empty spot) but hunter is borrowing the first few volumes rn so it looks sad and empty :( need to move the midari section to another shelf because it and the toga section next to it are getting too large to coexist on the same shelf anymore they need more room. and speaking of toga section

wonderful angel.. also getting crowded mostly because banpresto always makes giant ass bases which take up lots of space on shelves </3 take a hint from pop up parade bp your base game SUCKS.

also just now realizing how BADLY tumblr annihilates quality... pls click on the pictures nd zoom in i promiseee they are better quality than that pls..

here is my jiro section !

gets a whole shelf all to herself (except for the dabi figure.. who is my bookend). im on a quest to get every single (non-gk) figure of jiro EVER made and so far i am missing seven out of sixteen :( most of the rest are trading figures and funkos except for the bellfine scale figure which is hella expensive.. like $100+.. but she will be mine eventually. here are the ones im missing

top 3 are trading figures, middle is still on preorder i think so it cant be mine yet , jst need to track down the other two somewhere. on the bottom are two of the funkos which are easy to buy but i dont LIKE having funkos and i dont WANT them but because its jiro i have to buy them anyway :/ im just putting it off. i almost ordered the first one the other day but decided to wait for the price to go down a bit. middle one is a gamestop exclusive thats bundled with a t shirt and i could easily buy it rn at, yk, gamestop, but i dont want the t shirt so i gotta buy th funko individually off ebay. last pic on the bottom is the bellfine scale, found it for $90 on a site recently when it usually goes for $120/$130+ so hopefully it'll be mine soon!1 anywayy sorry 4 yapping.. just love jiro will collect all her figures 4ever. wish i could do that for toga but she has too many :( 62 compared to jiro's 16 :( anywayyy more shelfies

the midari section was formerly just the kakegurui section but i had to boot these 3 figures out cause they wouldnt fit:

mary nendoroid (which i got for a STEAL at $28 unopened, they usually go for like $70 or more), plus mary and yumeko pop up parades (they are holding hands). and next to them:

yamato section! my beautiful prince yamato! the angle of this one sucks.. wtv. the big figure between the manga is the most expensive figure i've bought so far at $45, not counting the kangel L pop up parade figure i preordered for like $64 (doesnt count cause i dont have it yet). and SPEAKING OF KANGEL...!

kangel pop up parade!!! i got her yesterday!!! and the goodsmile bonus p-chan (the sad kitty)! put her in front of my nso manga + switch game, im so so happy i got her :3 and i'll be even happier when i get the kangel L figure, which is wayy bigger and imo prettier

anywayy hope you liked my yappings bonesy if you see them n read them.. ^_^ and also anyone else who saw this on their dash and checked it out,, sorry for clogging your dash :(

figures are my passion my love my light my one true joy.. would love to answer any questions u have about them ever. need to take more closeup pictures also bc its so hard to see details in that shitty ass full shelf pic i took.. will take better pictures another time <3 shldve taken a closeup of my hxh section its so good,, or my edward section,, oh well

[mamadarama]

Sorry to bother you, but do you know why Souma hates Kaoru so much? I've seen a lot of things where they don't really get along, but I'm kinda new to enstars and don't have the full story. You don't have to respond if it's too much of a bother, but I figured you would know more than me about it. Thanks!

its no bother at all :)

its a combination of multiple things. kaoru used to be a bit of a dick when they were still in school . he was a known player with a bad attitude and was sort of mean to adonis, soumas best friend. souma prioritizes devotion and loyalty over all else and takes it very VERY personally when he thinks someone is mistreating his friends (or friends of his friends) so right out of the gate they started off on the wrong foot. he and kaoru are also polar opposite personalities . souma finds kaoru vulgar, irresponsible, unpleasant , and generally a perfect example of someone who goes against all his core values , putting him on a very short fuse with kaoru .

its gotten better in !! era since kaoru is much more mild mannered now and is actively trying to leave his reputation as a player behind , which was a big part of why souma doesnt like him. kaoru is also close friends with adonis and kanata , who are both close friends of soumas and souma holds his friends opinions in high regard. so he does acknowledge that if kanata and adonis trust kaoru, he cant be all bad, but he still personally doesnt trust him . theyre also in the marine bio club together with kanata, and kaoru is in the same unit as adonis , so he tries his best to coexist with him for the sake of peace (even though he'd really rather not have to at all). kaoru on the other hand doesnt hate souma even close to as much as souma hates him .

tldr; souma and kaoru have badly clashing personalities and values but unfortunately cross paths very often on account of having mutual friends

[horce-divorce]

"Trans men don't need an intersectional word that goes beyond "transphobia" because being a man is not an oppressed identity, it's easier for them to get resources, and they're not affected by transmisogyny"

Words spoken by people who have never met another GNC person offline (or another trans person who wasn't white) even once tbqfh. And yeah access to those spaces is difficult and often gatekept to shit so I don't think that's anyone's fault, esp not transfems. Your brutal exclusion is never your fault. Still, I think it is possible to have these CRUCIAL conversations about transmisogyny and how transfems are affected... without making sweeping statements about what other trans people do or do not experience. It might be easier for people to check their transmisogyny if they could understand how it does in fact affect them sometimes, their behavior, language, and the spaces they frequent, in addition to how it perpetuates this awful exclusion. Being hypervisible and yet constantly excluded IS something that transfems should have a word for. That IS something I do not understand the pain of as a transmasc. It must make them feel utterly insane. By all means, coin more words! It enriches these conversations when we can relate to each other more and we have more language for the discussions we're having. We want to tear down the walls keeping us apart, not build more.

to be clear, I don't think tma/tme are "unnecessary." Transmisogyny is real and transfems do really experience uniquely awful shit, especially from within the community. But that in an of itself is not a unique experience. Being excluded from "women and nonbinary only spaces" is actually not a uniquely transfem experience. So many transmascs do NOT benefit from patriarchy and I am tired of this claim coming from non-transmascs.

HOW we all get policed by our in-groups presents differently, but policing each others experiences is not something that bridges understanding. And I'm sorry but in 3 years of this convo I've not once seen someone bring up tma/tme to discuss transfems without entirely dismissing swaths of other queer people in the process. Maybe im not seeing the good faith takes, idk.

A lot of other bad-faith misinformation is STILL getting passed around about the coiner of the term "transandrophobia" and what it supposedly means, and how the term itself is transmisogynistic. None of that ever matches up with what I actually see in transandrophobia discussions. I see a lot of diverse people discussing and relating to transandrophobia, specifically a lot of tpoc and intersex people, even a lot of transfems. The people who talk ABOUT 'transandropobia truthers' present a much different idea of the discourse we're having than what i actually see. That inconsistency is a red flag for me.

Tldr i think the concept of tma/tme is fine actually, but I disagree with the usage of the term tme specifically. Terms describing what tma/tme are getting at AND transandrophobia can and should coexist. These are not mutually exclusive ideas actually. apparenrly i cant bring up one without addressing the other bc nobody has good faith conversations anymore.

Basically just. Please don't tell me what I have or haven't experienced, and I won't claim to know your pain intimately, either. we can still relate to each other over the ways we've been let down. I feel like that should be the goal, not determining who does or does not deserve to use certain words.

Also as an asexual, the whole "transandrophobia truther" dismissal feels eerily similar to the rampant ages-old acephobia from tumblr we know and love. You guys love mocking "novel" (to you) discourse and then 5+ years down the line acting like you weren't telling us to commit sepukku for suggesting that ace people can be oppressed for our orientation because we "don't even experience sexual attraction and you cant be oppressed for something you dont experience."

self determination is important for all of us for many reasons. I won't tell anyone else what words to use for themselves. If you're TMA youre TMA, end of story. But dont tell me by definition that makes me TME or that I have to use terms I feel are incomplete or inadequately describe my own experience. I'm not asking anyone else to do that.

Anyway.

[autisticlee]

kind of afraid to post this because I predict someone will misunderstand and be upset at me. but this blog is means as a personal journal and i don't post here for other people or attention—

something I see in the autism community (especially on tumblr) is when a less-disabled/lower support needs autistic is proud of their autism or likes it or whatever, the more disabled/higher support needs people think that person is invalidating them/their experiences and speaking over them (I'm not talking about posts that generalize all autistic people/autism as a whole and try to speak for everyone and say it cant disabled you because *they* dont struggle themselves. i only mean posts where people are talking about only their own personal experiences) but i've seen many posts and replies that tell people not to celebrate/be happy about/romanticize/like their own autism. just because they are privileged to not be disabled by it, and not everyone is as lucky, therefore it invalidates those struggling.

I get that it can make you feel left out and invalidated, but not everyone being happy about an aspect of something is forgetting you, talking over you, trying to invalidate you, etc. they can celebrate something without needing to add a reminder that other people are struggling. their experiences are allowed to be good and they are allowed to be happy about it! you can celebrate the good without it meaning the bad is being overlooked too. people can be happy about the positive traits of a thing without it meaning they dont care about the negative ones or the people affected by them.

maybe it sounds mean to "leave you out" but there's far more posts about the struggles of autism than good ones, at least from what i've seen, but tumblr algorithm so maybe thats incorrect. if you look up autism online though, you get flooded by negative things more than positive. lower support needs people also often get told they can't be autistic/don't need help/dont deserve accommodation because they aren't autistic enough. (even I get told this all the time and I feel i'm probably more in the medium support needs?) there's not much good for the people who need the good, so they make it for themsleves.

i'm sorry if it affects you to see people can enjoy an aspect of their lives that causes you great suffering :( I know how to feels to be struggling while people in the same place aren't and are having and sharing positive expiences because of the thing that causes you to suffer. i've been there and also felt left out and like they were ignoring me and my struggles. but!!!!! I learned that that's not always true! it doesn't have to be all bad for everyone! and they aren't trying to ignore my negative experience on purpose! we need to let people who need the positive have their own space just like the ones struggling. I struggle a lot with being autistic and sometimes wish I wasn't. but i'm still happy for the people that get positive things out of it instead and can thrive in life, while i'm barely surviving myself. these two things can coexist

maybe the low support needs people feel left out too and want to make their own posts among the sea of "autism is a horrible tragic disorder/disability and we wish we didn't have it and didn't struggle and suffer/autistic people can never have normal lifes/etc" and that's ok! everyone is valid, struggling or not. no one is talking over anyone else just by having a different experience and view! especially when they aren't making a side note to mention the other perspectives they don't experience themselves. it's not their job to always add a disclaimer about those other experiences. especially if they don't understand it because they never experiences it themselves and can't make an accurate post about it. you can make your own posts if you need to, or ask them to help you share it by sharing your experiences.

just like I make my own posts about how much I struggle in life because i'm autistic. often a post comes from reading a post where someone talked about how autism positively affects something for them, and I make my own post to talk about how that same trait affects me negatively. I don't comment on their post and say they are invalidating my experience. I don't let it make me feel bad or take it personally. I don't feel invalidated or attacked by low support needs who have amazing lives because they have friends and a job and other stuff and aren't struggling as much as me. I don't feel like they are talking over me when they say autism makes them smart enough to get a good job or empathetic enough to have lots of friends. i'm happy for them. they deserve support too.

basically, in simpler terms, someone saying they like pineapple on pizza and making a post about how amazing it is isn't invalidating people who hate pineapple on pizza, hate pineapple in general, hate pizza, or are allergic to pineapple or pizza. you can make your own posts saying you hate it, but don't say people who post about liking it are wrong and not allowed to like it!

again, i'm not talking about the posts where people say "*all* autistic people should like their autism because it's not a disability" or something like that. if that's what people are referring to when they make posts saying to not celebrate autism because it leaves higher support needs out and talks over their struggles, then I apologize. maybe i read those wrong or they aren't worded very well, just like i'm sure this post of mine isn't worded well and will cause people to misunderstand my meaning. but they're always worded to sound like no one should make positive autism posts because it makes people feel bad who don't have the same positive experiences. IF That is indeed the case, then that's just as unfair as the people that tell high support needs to stop complaining and enjoy their autism/disability instead!

this actually goes for many things in general, not just autism. replace autism with other things and it works as well. it's a lesson we need to learn together!

[mihai-florescu]

Do you agree with me that we should get rid of "death of the author" and that we should introduce "death of the audience" instead?

"Oooh but how will other people interpret this-" I don't know! I don't care! I wanna know what goes on inside the brain of the person who actually put their time and effort and soul into this. Not five million other people who Did Not Create the Thing.

(Sorry if this is weird but you feel like the most qualified person i know to have an opinion on this)

Disclaimer, im big on believing 2 things coexist at the same time about everything. My mood swings put me in black and white thinking often, but when i can think clearly from both perspectives im still a contrarian and have counter points for my counter points. Im gonna word vomit an answer, im not good at ordering my thoughts but i hope its fine still.

Oh brother i used to go on rants about this (authorial intent, media consumption, fandom culture etc) all of last semester and it's what ultimately led to me giving up on my degree and serious art altogether... i'll attach a few i found in my archive i think are relevant if youre curious beep meep meow. I was writing these posts at the same time as my thesis paper which was more hopeful and aiming to reframe what we consider escapism, but in the end by the finale (last assessment) the hatred won in my heart and i couldnt make a visual project with an audience in mind. I made something, but it was more like a rant with visuals and absolutely failed the "whats the future of this project?" question. Must it have a future for an audience? Its job was to be a confession and a respite, for my own expression. I dont want an audience, im too much of a misanthropic hater and possessive mother to let others see or interpret my ideas. I know it's selfish and counterproductive but i cant help it. You sending this ask made me laugh since it was so relevant to my struggles this year. Id love to break out of this cycle and mindset but i always go back here to these beliefs.

Anyway... i do think the sensible truth is somewhere in the middle. Reader's interpretation is essential for works to gain life in the world and to outlive their authors, and i revere stories for the ability to touch people's hearts and make them learn things about themselves as well as other's way of thinking (reading is a process of interpretation and contemplation afterall isnt it? Well, active reading at least. Citation to my written thesis). But im not a fan of fandom lens interpretations that so often flatten stories.

I think for our shared stories of interest authorial intent is particularly fun to think about. Commercial works made to sell gacha games but which do have heart and profound messages theyre trying to convey. But also made with an audience in mind. I havent been able to formulate any particularly riveting conclusions, but i would love to know if anyone has focused on such topics. Everything deserves analysis and attempts at understanding... and i find authorial intent an invaluable insight that can never be cast aside. Works gain lives of their own after theyre set free into the world, but they dont spawn fully formed from thin air ready for "consumption"...

Uuu im trying to decide if i should link to you a story about storytelling i wrote and illustrated in a day, and a video about humanity and the power of imagination as salvation and damnation... if i say "i'll share them, but only if you erase from your mind that i wrote them" it'd be hypocritical after everything i just spilled out. But too much knowledge about the author is scary too... not for the audience as much as the author himself. It's the audience who has the final laugh of judgement and interpretation... but it's scary to let others into your mind, to see things you spent time and energy on? I wish i could channel my death of the audience defiance into proudly sharing works without caring who sees them rather than deciding nothing is worth making anymore since im so mistrustful. Alas! Maybe one day i'll stop being a self absorbed, self sabotaging prey animal

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

cracks knuckles. so, been just trying to gauge overall reception with this, but what are your thoughts on the fan made return to the bunker episode? i’ve noticed glowing reviews from people who vaguely describe it—hit the character vibes right, jokes were cool, i liked the art, etc, but scathing ones from people who go more into detail—stan would never be this explicit in his desperation, ford was never this outcast or terrified of himself/others nor did he consider dipper as below, the entire thing was misogynistic, etc. so, what’s your opinion?

i did say i wasnt going to talk/reblog anymore posts about return to the bunker, but ill answer this anyway

i feel its kind of important to say right off the bat that i never finished the episode and i certainly dont intend to. i never even got to one of the b plot scenes with stan and dipper. i stopped around the bit where they got into the bunker and ford started trying to warn them about the shapeshifter. the clearly-not-ford-ness radiating off of 'ford' was too much to ignore and i couldnt finish it

anyway- what was good about the episode? well, the art and voice acting, for sure. during the first part, it also seemed like they had gotten the characters down pretty well and i thought some of the jokes were good.

in the first part.

and then mabel comes in. this is around the time real ford goes missing and fake ford shows up. no there arent two fords in the actual episode, its just that the difference between them is stark enough that theyre completely separate entities in my mind. anyway

i noticed that the sweater thing was weird to a lot of people. glad im not the only one that was extremely confused by the guy wearing a sweater saying it was too hot to wear a sweater. maybe it was meant to be a joke? it really just came off as ford trying to make excuses not to wear mabel's sweater.

which- its not like him not wanting to wear the sweater cant coexist with him liking mabel. maybe its a situation where he doesnt want her to see all his scars, or maybe he doesnt want it to get ruined when he goes to beat the shit out of the hawktopus (since yknow that was kinda the whole point of him being outside)

the point im trying to make here is that it really seems like the episode is just trying to paint ford as unreasonable and not liking mabel. speaking of which-

the way ford treats mabel is uncharacteristic. the first time we ever see ford smile in the show is when he's meeting mabel. he literally says 'i like this kid, she weird!', why are we acting like he doesnt like her?? genuinely confused. who looks at the way he was treating her in the episode and goes 'yeah fords just like that'?

sorry, anyway, last thing i have to say-

the entire bit where theyre making their way through the bunker struck me as a bit odd. it sorta felt like the episode was trying to make a joke out of ford and his wariness about the place? hes trying to guide mabel and some other kids he barely knows through the place, theyre rushing ahead (which cant be good for his paranoia), and for some reason when theyre getting close to shifty and hes trying to warn them its framed as him being melodramatic?

shifty locked his friend in a cabinet and pretended to be said friend so it could catch a look at the creatures in ford's journal and start transforming into them. i think hes allowed to be a bit cautious/afraid about meeting shifty again

and some bonus stuff ive heard about below:

ive heard that ford wipes their memories with the memory gun. he was a victim of it (implied or directly stated multiple times- who wants to bet hes got brain damage from that?) and he struggled so much to use it on stan in a situation where it was necessary to keep the world from ending. no, theres no way ford could just hit them with it like that

ive also heard fiddleford shows up and ford is weirdly antagonistic to him? 'im sorry fiddleford' is a phrase running through ford's mind on the constant for over thirty years and his first reaction to seeing fiddleford again is to apologize to him and assume he hates him. according to the journal, he actually mentioned to everyone else in the shack that he was wondering what happened to fiddleford. its implied he did that several times.

i dont have anything else to say and i dont know how to end this so. thats all. thank you for the ask and sorry if anything i said here sounded aggressive at all. not my intention.

uh moral of the story: i didnt like it :(

[curedeity]

this is a stick up!! give me your top 5 beyblade platonic relationships!!!

IT IS TIME IT IS TIME

1. Madoka and Gingka

This has to be first like im sorry but have you seen their qpr energy? They are literally the modt solid and consistent dynamic of the show, and while underutilized, theyre just genuinely sweet. I love how their relationship continues with them frustrating or annoying each other sometimes, like how youd imagine from a roommate youre comfortable with, but having that same genuine trust and care. Theyre a powerful team that just gets each other normally, and helps each other do a bit more, a bit better.

I genuinely love that theyre just so comfortable around each other with no romantic teasing. Gingka just gets to casually sleep on her couch and stuff.

And from a fanon perspective it gives me a lot to do. Both these characters end up being flat at my points through the show, and digging into their dynamic is one of my easiest ways to add depth to them.

I love having Madoka and Gingka turn to each other to manage the whirlwind of their team in masters. Traveling this far is something new for Madoka, and she clashes with the team a fair bit. Gingka, on the other, struggles to actually work as a team and could use Madoka there to remind him.

I love fury aus of these two, or roleswap aus, i think their dynamic in general has a lot to play with when them working together is placed at the forefront

To mention i love writing my post fury interpretation of the characters where, after being together for so long, they now live separately and have to learn how to manage that.

Basically, i think there are a lot of stages of their dynamic to explore if i dig into it. And theyre just genuinely solid.

2. Gingka, Hikaru, and Ryo

This is the only dynamic that could challenge for top spot and absolutely none of you are surprised to see it. I love this dumbass family dynamic, and it is genuinely sweet to me how Hikaru, even in canon, just gets welcomed in so easily and naturally.

I also think theres a lot to explore from each perspective (if you cant tell from my fanfic archive). Hikarus emotions about her mom and getting a new family, both her reticience and eagerness. Her different interactions with both Ryo and Gingka, because at least canonically its clear to see shes closer to Ryo, so discussing how that affects her rivalry and friendship with gingka is interesting.

And Gingka, post fusion, just got his dad back in a tumulteous way, so exploring that dynamic is interesting. Along with how his perspective on Hikaru would change as Ryo basically adopts her while hes traveling.

And Ryos perspective on these two? Phenomenal. The guilt over not being there for Gingka, the way he helps Hikaru and tries to grow close to her?

All three parts of this dynamic are very strong and unique with interesting aspects to explore, and ultimately just a strong family dynamic where they all really care for each other.

3. Yuki and Madoka

I care about these two being a qpr wayyyyyy too much for canon but like. Im correct and i should say it.

While Madoka and Gingka are interesting for how their priorities wildly differ but how they form a team anyway, Yuki and Madoka have this instant understanding of each other and agreement of whats important.

Not to mention how isolated Yuki is, and how a lot of his arc (or the semblance of one they gave him) is about him opening up to others and becoming more confident, i think him forming a bond with Madoka really works with that. He really deserves someone who understands him, and Madoka deserves someone with common sense.

It also leads to interesting post fury interactions. Madoka and Yuki, as much as they would be friends from fury, probably werent super close, and madoka just opened her house up to yuki as she does to everyone. But then they really have to get to know each other, because no way is Yuki going back to that observatory. Madoka has to learn how to coexist like this with a person who isnt Gingka, like, just a reminder of how different people are. And Yuki has to really come to trust Madoka, to not just be getting along because the world is ending, but to truly accept his place there.

Theyre just lovely. I love them

4. Yu and Tsubasa

Im not gonna write much about them here. Theyre just good. Look at canon, theyre perfect. I didnt want to put them here cause their so obvious. But itd also be a lie to not put them here.

5. Hikaru, Tsubasa, Kyoya and Ryuga

Putting these all together even though i ship tsubasa and kyoya, but in this case i have a separate platonic dimension for these interactions that center around Hikaru. This sort of dynamic is really one that emphasizes how what happened at the end of fusion affected each one, and how they all have different reactions to it and how to deal with it.

Choosing this sort of dynamic lets me use them to foil each other as a group, and gives unique individual interactions. Idk if i wanna detail them all, bc i have fics doing so, but ill take a second to justify Ryuga and Hikaru.

I think Hikaru is the only person who could really challenge Ryuga in how he hurt her (and maybe hyoma). Her life really, really changed from what he did, in a way that sets her apart from the rest in a way that would take ryuga out of his comfort zone the most.

Hiakru, similarly, is the only one of the trio that cant really deal with ryuga, and i like hurting her. Having to interact with him would force her to confront things she might not want to confront.

Tsubasa and Kyoya with Ryuga is just them bitching off at one another.

Honorable mentions!

Gan Gan Galaxy: they didnt get on here bc i highlighted two individual dynamics from this team, but id like to point out as a whole unit their dynamic is very strong. They really carry masters, each having a unique feel in the group and causing so much chaos. They really managed to make a great group with these characters, and im still immensely attached to all of them

Team Wang Hu Zhong: Theyre just perfect. I love the way their all supportive of each other, even if they snipe at each other sometimes. Just strong, nice characters.

Lera and Nowaguma: I like these two cause they remind me of me and my brother. Not that my brother is shy like Nowaguma but he doesnt talk a lot. And i talk A Lot. And am Very Loud. Its a good dynamic, i love it.

Team Starbreaker: Oh these guys are so fucked up. Theyre so fucked up together. Most would kill each other for a cornchip. I love them. Its especially fun to write their team interactions as a focus and try to figure out the ways they foil each other, when they were normally used for foiling specific gan gan galaxy or other cast members.

Maru, Ren and Zyro: all headcanon baby! I genuinely like the sort of sibling relationship most of the cast forms with Maru. I think we see it with Zyro the most, but i also think Ren would quickly ingratiate herself in the dynamic to be one of Marus women role models. I think Zyro and Ren have a strained relationship from how Ren is treated, but the way she learns his moves and challenges him is interesting, and I really wanna see him respect her similarly. I think theyd get along well and have similar chaotic energies.

Hyoma and Ryo: fucked up disappointed mentorship. What can i say? Hyoma has Issues and Ryo is a dumbass.

Lastly, Hikaru and Teru. I think they should be besties