#no matter what happens... it's possible to preserve and push through

[headmaster-merle-ambrose]

Hello, Wizards.

I need you to do it again to a different dictator.

Good evening, young wizards! I have a new favor to ask of you. There's a corrupt warlord by the name of Julius The Seizer running rampant in Aquila.

Go take care of him.

Best of luck, wizards!

[eatmeandbirthmeagain]

Could I make one where Balwin's wife is pregnant but during childbirth she is surprised and it is not a single baby, if it is not 3 triplets and they are chubby and pink, what will be people's reaction?

♡ Sweet Surprise - King Baldwin x Reader ♡

♡ Fluff ♡

A/N: Hello Anon! Thank you for the request, I think that this was one of the ones that got deleted by the glitch a little while ago so I'm so sorry about that, but I'm glad you sent it back in so I could complete it! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figures. Enjoy!

TW: Leprosy, Child Birth

It was exactly one month after the union between the king and queen of Jerusalem that y/n fell pregnant.

After many weeks of trying, it had finally happened.

The young couple were overjoyed, having exceeded all doubts about Baldwin’s fertility due to his illness. It was truely a blessing from the lord Himself and needless to say, the entire kingdom was of the same opinion.

As the months went on, the queen fell heavily pregant. More so than what was expected. This worried the physicians greatly, believing that there may be something wrong.

Y/n was confined to the royal chambers to preserve her health until labour.

Baldwin was destraught. Thinking irrationally, he believed that it had something to do with his disease.

His anxiety grew with each passing day, no matter how many times his queen consoled him and assured him that the situation was no fault of his own.

---------------------

And then, the day came.

The king was out overseeing the construction of a new church in the kingdom when a servant on the back of a large stallion sprinted up to the small group of officials.

“MY LORD MY LORD!” he shouted, leaping down from the horse, panting and tripping overhimself.

“Oh my, are you okay? What is going on?” Baldwin replied, his heart quickening at the thought of an emergency.

“My lord, its the queen, she is in labour!” 

The king and the rest of the small party waisted no time in mounting their horses and cantering back to the castle as fast as possible. 

When they arrived, Baldwin payed no attention to the pain that his body was in. He lept down from the horse, ignoring the surge of agony that shot through his lower body when his feet hit the ground.

He was the first into the castle and ascended the stairs to the royal chambers in no time.

Breathing heavely, he pushed open the doors with the last of his strength before falling to his knees.

Two maids immediately rushed to his side, helping their king to his feet.

“Y/n! Is she okay? Is the baby alright?!” he asked urgently, still panting heavily.

“Baldwin!” y/n called from the bed, “I am alright my love, come see!”.

As the kings vision cleared, the bed that held his wife came into view. As did the baby. And another baby? And another? In the queens arms lay three, healthy, chubby, pink babies who were all sleeping peacefully against their mothers body.

Baldwin gasped, a wide grin quickly spreading across his mask covered face.

The maids helped him to the bed, sitting him down carefully beside his wife.

“They are all healthy sweetheart, thats why my belly was so big! There was nothing wrong, I was just holding triplets!” y/n said, an equally wide smile on her face. 

The young king was lost for words and overcome with nothing but pure joy.

“I- I cant believe it! This is the most amazing day of my life! Oh thank you lord!’’ Baldwin praised, his grin hidden by the mask.

He pressed his forehead against the top of his wifes head, squeezing his eyes shut.

“I cant believe this is happening! I have never been happier” he said, feeling tears of joy welling in his eyes.

Y/n chuckled, “neither can I darling. And I thought we were blessed with one, but THREE!”

Baldwin opened his eyes to look down at his children.

Each one was plump and healthy. Their arorable faces melted his heart.

“There are two boys and one girl” the queen said softly.

“Would you like to hold them?” she asked.

Baldwin thought for a moment, “I dont know if that is a good idea, what if they get sick? I couldnt live with myself if-” 

“Darling” y/n cut him off gently.

“It will be okay. You are clothed and you are wearing your mask. Nothing will happen I can assure you. Allow yourself this moment, you deserve it” she told him with a smile.

He took a deep breath before nodding, leaning against the headboard of the bed and holding out his arms.

One by one, y/n carefully placed each tiny bundle of life in his arms.

Two of them stayed in peaceful sleep but ones eyes opened slowly. It was one of the boys. He did not cry like many babies would, he simply yawned and looked up at his father with big blue eyes. Big blue eyes, just like Baldwin’s.

The kings heart swelled with joy and happiness again at the sight of his son. His own son.

“Oh my love look!, he has your eyes” y/n cooed, looking at the adorable little boy in her husbands arms.

“Yes, he does!” Baldwin’s own eyes welled with tears at the sight and he fought back a broken sob.

Noticing his tear filled eyes, y/n placed a hand on her husband’s shoulder.

“Are you okay darling? Whats wrong?” she asked, suddenly worried.

“I’m alright my love. I’m just so happy, I never thought this day would come. Theyre so perfect, youre so perfect. Thank you y/n- I love you so much”

He tried his best to prevent tears from running down his cheeks, but when the chubby little boy in his arms smiled up at his fathers masked face, he could not fight it.

Y/n wrapped an arm around Baldwin’s shoulders and pulled him closer to her.

“You deserve this happiness sweetheart. I love you, and our family is, and will be, perfect” she kissed her husband's cheek and layed her head on his shoulder.

The king nodded, a small smile returning to his face.

He felt like the happiest man alive, and he knew that as long as he had these children and y/n in his life, he would stay that way for all eternity.

[bonsiii-art]

Please blab about the dynamic changes between Anon and Longan, we're all sat and listening OwO

ALRIGHTY ( •̀ ω •́ ) [ TL;DR bc omg this is long: Anon and Longan's relationship power imbalance goes crazy but they're both kinda into it. Warlord route is where things get rocky and it ends in a messy breakup, where Anon crumbles Longan. Emperor route is where everything is fine and they have a happy wedding :) ]

So, with Longan's new costume, it outlines three possible timelines that all branch off the main one, all starting from the outcome of the final confrontation between Longan and Gingerbrave and co. Establishing Longan and Anon's relationship before the branch-off point, while it's romantic, there's a huge power imbalance. Longan sees Anon as something that's theirs, body and soul. And this results in them having lots of control over Anon's activities especially where they go.

And Anon surprisingly does not mind it... as much at least. Their reasoning why is up to anyone since I like to keep my Anons as blank as possible. In this instance, set up is inevitable <:D. Back to this, I believe that while they are okay in their role that Longan's given them, they hope that the old dragon becomes more sentimental and trusting of them. So that Anon won't be just a cookie to them, they'll be their cookie, their one and only.

During the final battle, Anon would be in Longan Shaman's care, flying around with them in their wyvern form to stay out of danger. So, that's how they are currently and whatever happens in the story 2 months from now will help me decide what goes on from there for the main timeline! >:P ( @snipersiniora since this does answer your question. uwo quick answer is both!)

Now the two routes, starting with the Warlord of Eternal Rest path! As said, this is where everything went super wrong for everyone. The battle raged on until all the dragons were on their last legs. Longan would've hoped that the three dragons' struggle would make them falter but their resolve proved stronger than that. So, it was either them or Longan... and Longan won, killing all three. Lychee had also fallen during this due to having a change of heart and protecting Rambutan from falling debris, getting mortally wounded in the process. The destruction from the war was so great, it would scar the world for years to come. And due to Longan being pushed to their limits, the elimination of cookiekind was not perfect, as in a few survivors still remained, hidden from the dragon orbs. After the initial chaos, Longan attempts to preserve what's left of the islands and their palace. This takes years and their relationship with Anon suffers for it as the ivory dragon spends less and less time with them. Anon still loves them so they try their best to comfort Longan. However, once they saw Anon looking slightly older due to age, the reality of their cookie's mortality hits them and they panic, turning Anon into stone. (Btw, this is going off the idea that Longan can reverse the effects of turning one into stone via their power.) Finding that the world was in ruins no matter what they do, they shifted focus to finding a way to make Anon into a dragon to lengthen their lifespan. Now that they're truly alone, Longan realizes how much they took their companionship for granted and becomes unhealthily obsessed. Insert a small scenario during this period where a surviving cookie somehow sneaks into the palace to find a way to defeat Longan. That cookie finds an altar where Anon's statue is kept and in getting caught by the dragon, ends up accidentally knocking it over. The statue breaking in places sends Longan into a rage, quickly killing the intruder. The dragon's able to fix the statue with the life powder from the fallen cookie and other materials so it's cool for now, I just like angst :) Whether it's through magic or medicine, Longan finds a way to turn Anon into a dragon! So Anon wakes up, extremely sore (from being broken as a statue) but now a proper dragon. They're in a lot of confusion and unease, with their new form and the fact that Longan is much more doting than they remember. Since the dragon is less restrictive of where they go now, Anon travels around Earthbread. Things happen and they end up befriending cookie survivors. This friendship plants the seed of doubt in Anon, seeing the cookies don't deserve to live in these conditions. This all culminates in Anon creating a plan to get rid of Longan. The plan ends up being successful. All in exchange for the heartbreak Anon endures for the rest of their life, reliving the moments before the end and remembering how Longan did not fight back...

And now the Emperor of Eternal Paradise path!! This is where Longan got eeeeverything they wanted. In the final battle, they were able to get Pitaya, Ananas, and Lotus to submit defeat (or at least get them to a point where they can no longer fight on.) Once they quelled the rebellion, they set out all of their dragon orbs to take out the rest of cookiekind. After getting everything settled, Longan promises to formally be with Anon once they find a method of turning them into a dragon. And with endless resources on hand now, this takes almost no time at all (and no statue era for Anon 😔). In a new paradise, sprawling with nature and dragons, Longan and Anon vow their love and loyalty to each other. (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) To the other dragons, they'll never shake that feeling of something missing in their lives now. But for Longan, It's nothing short of perfect.

Sorry I didn't write much here; It's a bad end where everyone's completely boned. Except Longan. :D If you read all the way to the end, I'm sorry and thank youuu qwq

[cherrygenshin]

Obey Me! Rut HC's - pt.2

Warnings: NSFW, SMUT. Minors DNI. Again, no special warnings, just breeding.

GN reader.

Satan

His rut is average, lasting up to a week.

He's not too big on nest building, he finds it gets too stuffy in his room with too many items in it (let's be real, it's really cause it won't fit due to all his damn books)

Actually remains kinda the same? Just touchier?

Won't let you leave his room once you enter, if you do leave he won't let you back in, no matter how desperate he gets.

Snaps VERY quickly, but will try his best to keep his cool around you. He's just so worked up, he can't handle the pressure.

In post nut clarity he will be very smoochy to you, thanking you for putting up with him and giving you the best food he can find.

He's not great at regulating his emotions at the best of times, but now instead of 'ANGRY ANGRY ANGRY' his mind is full of 'BREED BREED BREED'.

Enjoys bending you over so he can pound in to you and groan lewdly in your ear.

PLEASE scratch him up, your marks on him means he's fucking you just right, he wants to see them.

Asmodeous

Longest rut out of everyone, tbh he kinda always wants to breed and be bred so it's not that different for him.

He will seek you out the moment he feels it coming. He normally has demons lining up around the block for a chance with him, but he'll choose you over anyone else. Of course, if you're down to enjoy his rut with more people, then he's down for that too.

Prefers being bred over breeding, I HC that he's got both a juicy cunt AND a nice dick. He uses both, but definitely prefers getting his pussy filled.

You think Levi was loud? Try Asmo. He LOVES the sound of his voice, and he knows you love it too. He will moan the house down.

He's ridiculously sensitive and very bratty, will try and push you further in to him/push himself further in to you, he's very needy.

Unlike his brothers, he's actually not very clingy during his rut, and enjoys his personal space, like taking nice long baths before the next wave of horniness overcomes him.

Overall he's very casual about the whole thing. You wanna breed him? Okay. You want him to breed you? Easy done. As long as someone gets to enjoy him, he's happy.

Beelzebub

Another vote for average rut length, lasts about a week.

Enjoys making a lil nest for you and him to spend the week in, takes pride in his nest building abilities.

OKAY so, Beel wants a family. Idc what anyone says, he's a family man through and through.

Being that he wants a family, his rut hits him very hard. His desire to breed completely overwhelms him, he becomes the most animalistic out of all his brothers.

Also, BIG DICK = LOTS OF CUM

He will FOLD you like a deck chair, just to shove his cock as far into you as he possibly can.

Grunts and groans, will also grip you tight enough to leave bruises, he just loves u so much he wants to be as close to you as possible

"Gonna cum in you darling", "gonna make you a parent", "Fuck- you're gonna be so hot carrying my child."

Will literally carry you to impale u on his dick if you get too tired, he is not stopping until you're pregnant.

Belphegor

Lucky ass bitch has the shortest rut, lasting only two or so days.

Probably will sleep through it ngl wet dream city

If he happens to be awake, he won't ask for help directly, he'll just expect it.

He kinda already has a nest in the attic, won't really add much more to it. He'd rather preserve energy to be able to fuck you properly.

Another for 'I don't really want kids but damn nutting in u is kinda nice'

Gets more whiny during his rut, when he's close he'll let out the most angelic soft moans and whines you've ever heard.

Although he isn't super energetic on the best of days, being in his rut really saps all his energy. He's got a cycle of fuck, sleep, fuck, sleep.

Unfortunately you will have to feed him as he really does put his all in to fucking you, he doesn't even have the energy to feed himself afterwards.

Big on show, don't tell. He won't tell you how much he loves you (he's getting better at expressing his emotions, but he's getting better!) But the way he holds you close as he sleeps says more than words ever will.

[terukotime]

thinking about Ace and Eden again and how i really don't want either of them to be the culprit lol. i just feel like either one being the blackened would be a waste of their potential. i know in Danganronpa that's bound to happen with some characters, but Ace and Eden both have traits and arcs that could run through the whole series, or at the very least, to the next chapter. while a big part of any killing game story is losing characters quickly and having their arcs and growth cut short (we've already seen as much with Arei, rest in peace queen), Eden and Ace have a lot of prominence in the Trust vs. Distrust theme of drdt, on either side respectively. and they both have a lot of potential for their views to change. i can totally see Eden's optimism finally starting to crack, and she begins to lose hope in trusting others and thinking they're good-intentioned, especially since she was put in virtually the same place that Teruko was in in the last trial, with everyone distrusting her and thinking she's the culprit. though Ace hasn't had much of a catalyst to alter his beliefs yet, there's still hope for his views to change. he's a lot like how Teruko began to behave after the first trial, thinking he can't trust or rely on anybody and pushing everyone away as much as possible.

[giant-ass analysis under the cut. i didn't expect myself to go on such a huge rant, but i realized i have quite a lot of thoughts on the matter lmao. there are probably a lot of hot takes in here and i know there will be people who won't agree with me, so take this all with a grain of salt, pls & thx]

while Ace's role in the trials is mostly confined to causing conflict and being a comedic relief, he's expressed being committed to investigating the scene of Arei's death. while sure, if Ace is the culprit, his desire to investigate could very well be a ruse. but for the sake of his potential, it'd be far more interesting if him being innocent results in him going on to investigate more thoroughly and contribute substantially to the trials. Arei did have potential for a full redemption arc, but her death doesn't feel narratively unfulfilled. its tragedy not only allows the audience to further sympathize with Arei and see just how nuanced she was, but it's also meaningful to the members of the cast, and will serve as a point of motivation for them, whether that be to maintain hope in escaping or giving into despair.

at least, that's how it's set up to be. i feel that if either Eden or Ace are the culprit, Arei's death loses a good deal of its weight and meaning. especially if the culprit is Eden; even if she had "well-intentioned" motivations for killing her (as well-intentioned as murder motivations can be, anyway), Arei's breakdown, desire to change, and tragically short path to redemption is rendered pointless. her want to be a good person will have affected virtually no one. her death will have only held significance to David, as most of the cast didn't care for Arei or hated her, much like Ace.

while Culprit Ace won't render Arei's death *as* meaningless as Culprit Eden, it sure would make Ace's own death feel pretty meaningless. he'd be dying in a trial where he fully believes everyone is cruel, everyone hates him, and no one cares about him at all. his shift in his belief can't really be considered much of an arc or even a regression; he just descends further into his hatred and paranoia until he dies doing exactly what the killing game expects of him. Ace, a character who has prioritized his self-preservation all throughout the series, will have thrown that away for...what? revenge against Nico? would he really place his hatred for them over his fear and will to live? Ace is impulsive and narrow-minded, but he's not without *some* sense. if Ace were to be the culprit of this chapter, what would he have contributed to the story? what would his existence have meant? what would he have provided that the story can't progress without? he'd have zero growth, zero stakes, and zero relevance to the ongoing plot, aside from unrevealed backstory (most of which will likely go unsaid in the main story if he were to die now). do i think Ace is going to play a significant role in the overarching story? no. not as much as characters like Xander and David, anyway. but he still has so much to offer as either a survivor or later victim/culprit, as we'll have spent more time with him, gotten a better understanding of him, and possibly be able to sympathize with him, like we do with Arei.

and here's another thing i've been thinking about, too: all the deceased so far have a point of significance to the story. Xander has a connection to the larger-scale mystery surrounding the killing game and a complex relationship with David. he continues to be relevant in the story even after his death and will likely always be.

Min is not only a cautionary tale to the rest of the cast, but her story follows a very cohesive path:

she's a girl committed to her academics and has been led to believe it's the only thing about her that matters ->

while not a social butterfly, she still enjoys spending time with others and making the most of the situation she's in ->

she forms a bond with Teruko, someone who has shown to value both her intelligence and her personality ->

she finds Teruko being murdered by Xander, and instead of being a bystander, she takes action to save her friend ->

she realizes that what she did has jeopardized her own life, a life that she does not center around herself. her family depends on her having a successful future, a future she has been groomed to achieve since she was little and has made several sacrifices for ->

though Teruko is her friend, Min prioritizes her self-preservation. there are too many things that are objectively more important to her than the life of a girl she's known for a couple days ->

still, she cannot shake her guilt and chooses to remain at Teruko's side throughout the investigation ->

she's desperate to maintain her lie, even if it means framing the friend she tried to save and getting everyone else killed. she fights and fights until she can no longer ->

she loses everything. her life, her future, the trust of her friends, the trust and bond she had with Teruko. Min always had good intentions. but even good-intentioned people can do terrible things.

Min's story throughout Chapter 1 alone is very digestible and easy to follow. even without knowing the greater contexts of her life, like her family's financial situation or her groomed future of being a Hope's Peak student, her motives and actions make complete sense. you don't come away from it feeling like she acted out of character or that her death was hasty or sloppily written. her death has a lot of meaning and impact on the other characters.

and that alone makes Culprit Eden or Culprit Ace unsatisfying. Culprit Eden would not only undermine Arei's death and potentially lead her into character derailment, it'd also just be Min's story regurgitated in a much less compelling manner. Teruko has already had her trust broken, and while it seems like she's slowly starting to see the value in relying on others again in the Chapter 2 trial, what good would Eden's death do for her? even if it causes Teruko to regress, what will change? wouldn't Teruko go back to being the way she was acting at the start of the chapter, undoing whatever growth was already beginning to happen? will she be unaffected by Eden's death, or at least act like it? will it somehow strengthen her desire to trust and rely on others again? (it won't.) Eden's role as the chapter 2 culprit really won't do much good for the story, regardless of what her reasons are. everything we've learned about Eden and Arei, both together and individually, will be irrelevant. the significance of Arei wanting to be Eden's friend unconditionally, something that we learn is so significant for her because of her secret, will turn out to actually be pointless because Eden will have killed the one person who expressed they'd be her friend her regardless of who she is.

Ace simply hasn't done enough in the story to establish his deeper character. with Xander, Min, and Arei, we already got glimpses into their core beliefs, their true selves, their moral standings. if those aspects of a character are only revealed after they're confirmed to be the culprit, then honestly...that's just bad writing. i don't like saying that, but i firmly believe it. not only do we hardly know anything about Ace's backstory, we just don't know a whole lot about him other than surface-level things the show outright tells us: he's fearful and paranoid, he doesn't like being a jockey, he's hotheaded and unsociable, he developed an eating disorder due to the strict requirements of his talent, he's hardly ever had any friends, he doesn't think anyone cares about him. and while a lot of inferences can be made from that information, it's still very speculative, and even a bonus episode after his execution wouldn't be able to cover enough of his backstory and personal life for it to feel justified narratively. you simply can't kill him off without letting us see another side of his character and have it better the story.

if either of them do, unfortunately, turn out to be the true culprit of the case...i will be very disappointed. i won't drop drdt or criticize drdtdev for their decisions, but i will still personally believe it to be a bad choice. nevertheless, it's not my story, and i will continue to support and enjoy the show regardless. i have a lot of faith in drdtdev's skills as a storyteller, but no story can be completely perfect. Ace or Eden being the true culprit won't destroy the show as a whole, and i'm not trying to imply that it's a fundamentally bad choice, i just think it'd be very difficult to pull off and have it feel natural, organic, and satisfying for the ongoing story. i will neither be optimistic nor pessimistic about what happens in the next coming episodes, i will simply wait and see. i just wanted to get all my thoughts out here, and hopefully i didn’t come across as aggressive or snobbish or anything. this is a free to watch series, after all, and i enjoy and appreciate all the hard work that has gone into it and made it possible.

[cccakessslicemeee]

Spoilers for fantasy high

Uhhhh mentions of death

And accidentally getting turned into paste by vehicular means. Car crash. Hit and run? So much blood and death

Not a fic, merely a thought bubble..here have it.

---

want Riz to get smacked with a car going 90 miles a minute. He's just turned into paste in a matter of seconds. Riz wasn't adventuring. He was getting coffee and answering a phone call from Kristen when he stepped into the road. Careless of course but Elmvile is usually such a sleep town. She's talking about something trivial or insignificant but it's not insignificant if it's coming out of Kristen's mouth. He listens. He fumbles with the crystal just trying to put it in his shoulder so he can adjust his armful of things. Preoccupied by worrying about Kristen and what she has to say he doesn't hear the car. He doesn't hear the scream or the screech of tires that try to stop but ultimately he's reduced to paste. No bones. Just blood. Gone in a blink.

Kristen is on the other end worried she's pissed him off and he hung up. The lines dead.

She won't know he's dead until hours later. None of them do. Not until the news airs and Kristen is halfway through a burrito and barely catches the name.

Oh. He didn't hang up.

He'd never hang up. He's not like that. He's too kind and too good for that. He'd say good bye at least...

Hours have passed.

The body is no longer intact.

Who the fuck has the body?

She can fix him. She can. She totally can. They just gotta find him.

She shrieks. Everyone hears. She babbles and chokes but is unable to make sense of words right now so she points to the T.V and it's beyond the broadcast now. They have to move fast. They have to get moving NOW.

Where's the body? There is no body. There's blood on a pavement somewhere.

Riz was paying attention to her bullshit. His eyes were not on the road while she was bullshitting. She could have called him later. Or earlier. Or at any other point in time. Where the fuck is the body? Where the fuck is the body?

Elsewhere Sklonda is called to identify a body..there isn't much to see. His personal affects are a clear indicator and that's all she needs to know for sure. She isn't worried. Alright maybe a little. This isn't quite her area of expertise but instead of panicking she concerns herself with her son's return and how she could possibly make use of her time. His documents, his briefcase, his everything that's still salvageable is drenched in blood and just a horrible mess. Well she can find someone with a mending spell and preserve his current case file. Would be a shame if he could solve the case because his file was ruined.

She makes a call to Kristen who has Jawbone rush her down to wherever they are. Wow. He's really a mess.

Cassandra warns her a revivify and spare the dying would be a waste of spell slots but she burns them anyway. Kristen feels better seeing +something+ that was once Riz.

In a way it's a fucked up puzzle. What if she puts his shoe back on his foot and then his foot...kind of. Uhhhh...... Back on the leg(?) no wait that's a knee...

Adine tells her to stop playing with the body. Kristen shoots her a nasty look. She ain't playing. "I can fix him up. He'll be fine. I just need you to quit bitchin' so I can think"

Fig talks to Ayda. A couple of text. Students die all the time. It's a part of adventuring. Ayda calls her dad who says something about "it happened so domestically I don't think I can do anything about it"

Haha fuck.

Sklonda knows people. Death was such a common place she knows a couple experienced clerics. They're pricey but it seems like Fabian is perfectly fine with that especially after the break down of why it is so costly. Making a new body from scratch is quite exhausting because the chosen deity pushes a lot of energy through their cleric to warp or bend reality so that things like that could happen.

They can get him back. Apparently it'll be pretty easy.

Regardless Riz is in heaven. He's confused. What took him out? Is his party okay? What the fuck it was Tuesday? His wings, new things are quite large. Big enough to cocoon himself within them, just think and wonder what fuck. His dad isn't there immediately. He was doing xyz but the moment he heard he made his way back and went to find his son only to stumble upon the ball of feathers.

They dont talk. Not for a while. Maybe Pok tries to but Riz is like no. I don't want apologies or pity. So they sit there enjoying a cool breeze until Riz says something. "Fabian's too cool to skip stones at the river."

"Is he now?"

"Yeah. I can't do it."

Pok used to be able to skip stones across rivers and lakes but that was a lifetime ago in his boyhood. Surely they can figure it out together.

They do that for a time every toss and fling better than the last.

Then a bright light comes looking for Riz. It ask him, no offers for him to come back and he hesitates. He doesn't feel like shit up here. There's so much work to be done.

Pok let's Riz marinate over it but they both know he has to go back. He's got so much life to live yet.

So he goes.

Kristen gives him the biggest bear hug when he comes back. She holds onto him for far too long afraid if she lets go he'll be gone again forever. She's sorry she wasn't there or close and fuck she shouldn't have called.

Merely a thought

[seonsong]

unlikely ally, chapter 1 twinkling watermelon, episode 9 word count: 623 | rating: pg alternate timeline: se kyeong stays in seoul

He disentangles his feet from the life preservers and offers his hand to Se Kyeong.

“Are you okay?” he begins to ask, but in a split second she’s upon him, and his back slams into the lockers with an echoing bang.

“Hey, you jerk!” she snarls at him, and Eun Gyeol thinks he’s never been this afraid for his life. “What’s with you? What are you doing right now?”

“Well, the teachers were chasing us and I didn’t want you to get in trouble. I was trying to help—”

She pushes him back again. “Not that.”

“Not that?”

She’s looking daggers at him, but the adrenaline rush has finally begun to wear off, and he remembers why the trouble began in the first place. He suddenly feels very small.

“Oh. I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have confessed my love publicly like that.”

“No kidding!” Her face looks hot and red. “Do you know why I hated when you and Yichan showed up at that concert?”

“W- why?”

“Because just like every other man, he can’t take no for an answer. I didn’t realize you were just as bad as he was, but I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised by someone who hangs around him so much.”

Eun Gyeol blinks. “Then you’ve told him no?”

“Of course I have!” She stops a moment and checks her volume. “Let me make this perfectly clear to you. I have a boyfriend. I love my boyfriend. And neither you, nor Ha Yichan, nor any other jumped-up little trophy hunter is going to make me change my mind.”

“You really mean that?” asks Eun Gyeol, suddenly flooded with optimism.

“Completely.” (Through gritted teeth.)

He brightens then, and takes her hands enthusiastically. “That’s great! Then please continue to date him—”

The unexpected contact does not please her. She pushes him away savagely, and he shrinks back into himself.

“I simply can’t understand you, Ha Eun Gyeol,” she says after a moment. “You declare your love for me in front of the whole school, you get into a fight with your best friend over me, yet when I tell you I’ll never date you, you get happy?! Are you mentally ill?”

“Not that I’m aware.”

“Then what are you playing at?”

He sighs, running through all the options as quickly as possible in his mind. “You want the truth?”

“Please!”

“Fine, then. I don’t like you. I don’t think you’re particularly attractive, and you have a personality like the inside of a refrigerator.”

“Ha!” she scoffs out, eyes wide. Then, more calmly — “Paradoxically, that’s the most refreshing confession I’ve gotten in the last month.”

She folds her arms across her chest. “Well, go on, then. What’s your angle?”

“I was just— trying to use the situation to make Yichan stop hanging around you.”

“But why? What do you gain from that?”

“I was…” Eun Gyeol sighs. He’s cornered. Now that he’s begun to tell the truth, he can’t find where to draw the line. “It’s because I think he should be with Yoon Cheong-ah.”

Se Kyeong’s entire expression changes; her scrunched forehead relaxes and her mouth falls slightly open. “Wha— Cheong-ah? Yoon Cheong-ah whom you live with?”

“Yes.”

“But why? What does that matter to you?”

Oh, that’s where to draw the line. “Look, I can’t explain it. I just happen to know that they need to be together. It’s important.”

She scoffs. “What are you, some sort of fortune teller?”

“Hey! You two!”

They both gasp and turn like deer in headlights.

They’re caught.

[lukeria314]

About Soukoku and the Perception Issues of Their Relationship

The difficulty in perceiving their relationship arose quite suddenly and in a rather strange way. This is ironic because the dynamic of their relationship fits the societal archetype of something sacred and quite intimate: you can joke, hit, tease, and push someone to their limit, but both parties understand that the other is not truly against it. You wouldn’t act this way with just anyone. But if something genuinely bothers either of you, you either feel it instinctively or discuss it directly, because you matter to each other.

This is exactly the nature of Soukoku. But at some point, people began to view their relationship through a much more uncomfortable lens, distorting the original canon. Chuuya behaves with Dazai in a way that is entirely unique, but this is not a flaw — on the contrary, it is that “special” way of perceiving a person that is rarely seen with anyone else.

Soukoku spent several years side by side. They understand that if something the other did truly hurt them, it wouldn’t have happened in the first place. They are mature, civilized people capable of dialogue and, when necessary, taking each other seriously. Society itself was the one to equate this with intimacy and, after that, became angry at its own interpretation.

I dare say that their relationship is almost healthy — at least, considering the moral norms of their world, which is distorted and distinct from ours due to the existence of ability users. Both of them enjoy their quarrels and teasing. Dazai actively seeks to get under Chuuya’s skin, and Chuuya cares about him despite it.

If the problem lies in how much they mean to each other, then there is no room for argument. Both Oda Sakunosuke and the Flags were of different importance to Dazai and Chuuya, respectively. But for Chuuya, Dazai is just as important as the Flags. For Dazai, Chuuya was just as important as Sakunosuke. However, human psychology and grief for the deceased remain unchanged regardless of logic.

I won’t bring up Storm Bringer as an example since they were younger there, and many moments are too controversial.

But I will reference BEAST, where Dazai “kills two birds with one stone.” In BEAST, memories intertwine with the original and with other universes. Here, Dazai aims not only to preserve Oda’s life in this world but also to free Chuuya from regret because he knew what kind of person Chuuya was. Dazai intentionally tried to make Chuuya hate him — to make him wish to kill him with his own hands. But Chuuya isn’t that kind of person. Even after Dazai’s death, he was torn between two opposing feelings: hatred for not having been the one to kill him (though he had every right to, considering all he had endured) and grief because he still had an emotional attachment to Dazai. Chuuya is someone who bonds with others emotionally, and that attachment to Dazai never fully disappeared.

In the original universe, Dazai actively seeks to maintain their connection, unlike BEAST, where he pushes Chuuya away. Yet in both universes — the original and BEAST — Chuuya walks the path of literal self-destruction. (It’s worth remembering that Chuuya is always extremely cautious about using Corruption and tries to avoid it by any means possible.)

In Dead Apple, he activates Corruption to save the city. The problem is that, if Dazai had not been alive, Chuuya would have wiped out the entire world by himself, only to die from the effects of Corruption. But Chuuya believed Dazai had already considered this part of the plan and trusted that he would be saved.

In BEAST, however, driven by rage and emotion, Chuuya activates Corruption to destroy the Agency and, seemingly, everything around him. He knew it would kill him. Dazai even says this aloud in the film. And Chuuya still went through with it. He consciously chose that death, those sacrifices.

The status Dazai held in BEAST, as well as the accumulated trauma from past losses of loved ones, affected Chuuya so profoundly that he became paranoid when it came to Dazai. He evaluated every possible outcome, every possible threat, and constantly criticized Dazai for his recklessness.

Soukoku has a brilliant dynamic. We just need more time to fully appreciate it.

[dramalove247]

Growth, change and patterns

Love reading other perspectives and they often inspire us to think deeper about our own feelings. We really enjoyed this Business As Usual post by @miss0atae for this very reason, even if we came to a different conclusion.

Thinking about this is making us want to rewatch it... and we still might... so it's possible we could gain a new perspective. But our impression was that Min Jun has changed through his experiences, though not always for the better.

I feel the need to start by saying that we get to see VERY little of who these people have been for the last 8 years. And even now, we only see them as they react to each other, within this relationship and this situation, with all their baggage of the past and how it impacts where they are now at this point in time. Their existence and personality outside this relationship is mostly unknown to us. And honestly, it doesn't matter because we can have epic growth individually and still be stuck in old habits and patterns within established relationships. Sometimes it is hard to free ourselves from who we were to make space for who we are or are becoming. For this reason, it can be much harder to break a pattern than to just start over with someone new where there is no history that needs to be overcome.

We totally agree with @miss0atae that Min Jun seems tired to his core. Depression seems like a possibility, but it's hard to know if this is his "normal" or just where he is at in this particular moment. If I had someone suddenly show up in my life that had hurt me the way Min Jun had been hurt (misunderstanding or not), my emotional state and behaviors would have little to do with how I am managing life on a regular basis. So we aren't convinced that Min Jun's current state as we see him is representative of how he has spent the last 8 years.

The series made a point to say that both had been more submissive in the past, both changed themselves to fit the other, both were insecure and afraid, and both had grown and changed from who they were in the past, and continue to grow as they navigate their current relationship. But for the sake of this post, we are here to focus on Min Jun's growth. I've already written a book, so I'm going to try to keep this short and only make a couple of points. 🤣

One of the big things we noticed is that Min Jun is a lot less passive. Does he still have more work to do in this area? Yes. They even made a point of this with him staying silent at work and taking on too much. But even Jin Hwan says he's changed and is more outspoken. And we see Min Jun frequently push back against Jin Hwan, rejecting him and speaking up about his feelings. He believed he let himself be used last time, and he won't let it happen again. Even when he realizes it was a misunderstanding, he isn't silent when he perceived he's being played with.

And we see this growth again after the wedding when he declines the invitation to go out to dinner. In the past, we saw him cave when Jin Hwan pushed his invitation to join him with his friends. So Min Jun seems a lot more willing to say what he is feeling and prioritize his own desires over those of someone he likes.

We also feel he has grown more protective of himself. He's experienced a deep wound that left serious scars. Even knowing it was a misunderstanding does not change that experience. He can intellectually understand he cut himself, but the wound still existed. Yes, Min Jun had been afraid to admit his feelings in the past, fearing the pain of rejection. But he is even more afraid of that pain now that he has experienced it. This is the change that has not been for the better.

Also, this self preservation fuels his fear as soon as he recognized himself returning to old patterns. He likes Jin Hwan and that scares him. That fear of being vulnerable and opening up to this man to risk being hurt again is clear on his face when they sleep together for the second time. It was devastating to see them repeat the pattern of experiencing the same event so differently. But even with bigger walls this time, with epic levels of reassurance from Jin Hwan, Min Jun ignores his fear enough to let himself surrender to his emotions in this moment, just like he did last time.

But this is short lived. With his growing feelings for Jin Hwan, Min Jun also recognizes himself returning to those old patterns. The increased hope comes with increased fear, and the pain he experienced in the past gives his fear much bigger teeth. So as soon as he finds himself back in a familiar place, watching his phone, waiting for a text, something to prove to Min Jun that he's important, that he isn't being used by Jin Hwan (this time to resist his father), and when that text doesn't come, his need for answers causes him to start searching, while also being afraid of what those answers could be. And when he finds Jin Hwan, the need he feels is too much and the pain too familiar. It's too scary. He knows this isn't healthy and he doesn't want to be back here living these same patterns over again. So he runs away, just like last time. Only now he will tell Jin Hwan to his face, communicating clearly what he wants with devastating impact. And Jin Hwan, having been as clear as he can possibly be, knows there is nothing else he can do, will close the door because it wasn't enough. AH! It's so sad! Having feels!

ANYWAY! By the end, Min Jun grows again. Realizing he is repeating another pattern, making the same mistakes he made last time (thanks to the best wingman EVER!), Min Jun is finally willing to face his fears and stop running. ABOUT FREAKING TIME! He knows he might get hurt, but he won't hold back. And Jin Hwan finally got what he deserved, someone who chooses him back and is willing to fight for him.

We spent the entire show being mad at Min Jun and we weren't ready to forgive him. Honestly, not sure we have. But we will call this ending good enough for Jin Hwan and good enough for us. It told a story we can respect and Min Jun owned his mistakes, grew, and gave us hope he will do better.

Thank you @miss0atae for sharing your perspective and inspiring this post! Please don't think we are picking on you because we had a different opinion. We just wanted to give you credit for making us think deeper about this character. ❤

[musings-ofthe-unamused]

Until the Final Bullet Pt. 1 (Price x Reader)

A/N: Imagine getting stuck in the UK during the apocalypse that would suck. Also read the other parts of the series here!

Warnings: Violence, angst, military men

Word Count: 2k

Ask Box: Open

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Everyone knew it was coming. Years and years of nonstop war would surely lead to dire outcomes. And that outcome was the apocalypse. What people didn’t know was that the cause was a zombie outbreak. It had to be a zombie outbreak. 

You always told yourself if this ever happened, you would swan dive straight off the roof of a building. Who wants to live a life surrounded by rotting flesh monsters? Not you. It was enough that the apocalypse had broken out while you were on vacation, but the fact that it was zombies made matters worse. Much worse. 

You crouched in the back of an abandoned supermarket. It had taken you days to make your way over here without attracting any attention. Everything was a complete mess. Fires, overturned vehicles, houses ransacked. It was hard to find supplies and it’s only been two months since the outbreak. You took a can of beans and stabbed into the lid with your knife. It made a hissing noise and juice bubbles from the hole. 

Gross. 

Back in the good ole USA, you would’ve been in luck. Every food had much more preservatives than anywhere else. You could’ve had your fill to eat. Yet, you were now eating sad British food. Beans. Not even the good baked beans, with little bacon pieces. Cold, wet, and flavorless beans. You used your knife as a spoon and shoveled them into your mouth. At least it was better than nothing. 

You didn’t know how much longer of this you could take. You missed having junk food for dinner, you missed being able to walk around with the threat of being bit, and you missed fresh. Fuck, you really missed it. Everything stinks literally. As you ate, you thought of what your plan was. Killing yourself? Raiding all the stores you can, gathering supplies, giving them to a group of people, and then killing yourself? No. If things were better and you had a lover, you could've been all poetic and turned with them. Instead, you were lonely.

You were pulled out of your thoughts as you heard a groaning noise. And then several others. The thought of going out by being eaten by a group of zombies was the least appealing way to die. You made your way silently through the supermarket towards the toy section. You grabbed the loudest looking toy you could before heading outside. There was a small horde of zombies just outside. You counted them, for a total of four. You could have easily killed them, but you didn’t want their rotting guts and blood all over you..

You silently opened the door and slid out. With a quick hand, you turned on the toy that’s glaringly loud. You threw the toy as far as possible. The rotting creatures immediately were on high alert and slowly trudged towards the noise. You slowly walked backwards, keeping an eye on them in case they decided to turn around. After going a sizable distance, you turned to escape. Hands grabbed your shoulders.

“Hey there, lass.”

Your immediate reaction was to clock the stranger right in the face. But he was obviously way stronger than you. He grabbed your fist and squeezed it tightly. Your eyes narrowed. The man was tall, with a faux hawk. He had a goofy smile that was a start contrast to his tactical gear that he wore. There was a patch on his vest, Military.

“Let me go.”

“Now, now.” He clicked his tongue, releasing your fist. “I won’t hurt you.”

“That’s what everyone says.” You pushed past him. “Now if you excuse me, I’d like to be away from the horde of zombies before the toy shuts off.”

You started to walk away. He followed, Of course he did. Why wouldn’t he? You try to walk fast to keep your distance, but it was no use. He had on that same goofy smile.

You sighed. “Why are you still following me?”

“Because that was a good trick you used. Using toys to lure the zombies away. How did you come up with it?”

“I didn't. I saw it in an anime.”

“Oh.”

“Why are you following me?”

The man grinned, the lilt of his accent heavy. “I’m not. I just happen to be going in the same place.”

You got even more suspicious. You had to run into your fair share of people that seemed friendly, but would end up robbing you blind. Of course, you’ve seen enough zombie movies and played enough games to know better. Your hand rested on your knife holster. You gripped the handle, ready to strike.

“My name is Soap, by the way.”

“Really?” You raised an eyebrow and he nodded. You scoffed. “Ironice. You smell like ass.”

“Not worse than the zombies though, right?”

“No comment. Now stay away.”

You kept walking. The man, Soap, didn’t listen to you. You didn’t know where you were going, exactly, but you knew you didn't want it to be around this man. So you kept walking through the empty streets, hoping that he took the hint and left. But he didn’t. He also wouldn’t stop yapping about some random shit that you had no interest in. Ten minutes later, your knife was pressed against his neck.

“Stop following me or I’ll kill you.”

“That won’t be necessary.” A deeper, much darker voice said from behind you. You could feel the tip of a gun barrel now pressed against the back of your head. You closed your eyes and slowly lowered the knife. You turned to see the man. This guy was even bigger. The clothes he wore were similar to that of Soap’s. He wore a skull mask, making him even more intimidating than the other guy. There was no way you could take them. In a fight, of course.

“Using a gun? Really?”

The skull face shrugged. “I don’t see any zombies around here.”

“Yeah, that’s what they all say. Then they’re eaten.”

Soap laughed. “You’re a pessimistic one, aren't you?”

I just rolled my eyes. “Whatever. I won’t cause trouble , so let me leave.”

“No can do, sweetheart.” Skull face replied. He placed the gun back in its holster. “You shouldn’t be traveling around.”

“Ghost is right.” Soap said, crossing his arms.

Great. Two big and buff guys won’t let you leave. This is just peachy. You hated being a group, but you hated military men even more. They were nothing but disgusting and violent assholes that are no longer barred by the law. Bad news. But what was pissing you off even more was the fact that they assumed you couldn’t take care of yourself. Which you totally could.

“I’m fine on my own.”

Ghost eyed you. “With as frail as you look?”

“I hate British food.”

“Can you even use anything other than a knife?”

“I can use a bow or crossbow.”

“No guns?” Soap asked.

You shook your head. “Guns are too loud. Plus it’s hard to find bullets.”

“Then come with us. We’ll help.” Ghost said. “We have a whole entire base filled with food,water, and weapons.”

“No. I don’t trust the military.”

“Special forces, lass. We’re special forces.”

“Doesn’t make a difference. Goodbye.”

They didn’t try to stop you. Instead, they followed. If you were stronger, you would have killed them on the spot. But alas, you were just a normal citizen. Kind of. Your eyes scanned the terrain as you walked. There were always at least one or two zombies around. And as if on cue,  one appeared hobbling down the street.

“I got it.” Soap said, taking out his gun.

“Don’t-“

It was too late. Soap shot the zombie straight in the head. The sound was loud and rang out in the empty streets. That’s when the rest of the horde showed up. There must have been ten of them, if not more. You facepalmed, angrily turning to face the two military men.

“Are you guys idiots?”

“Watch it.” Ghost growled. “This isn’t the time to insult us.”

Soap frowned. “It seemed clear enough.”

I rolled my eyes. “That’s how it always is. If there’s one zombie, always assume here’s more. I thought the special forces were supposed to be smart.”

Instead of listening to what they have to say, you quickly ran ahead, looking for cover. There was a large walled area ahead. The walls were made of makeshift metal haphazardly welded together. In front of those walls were bushed that you promptly hid yourself in. You stayed completely still as the horde made their way to the noise. This wasn't going to be your problem to deal with. As soon as the horde descended on the two military idiots, you'll make your escape. 

A loud boom shook your body. You clamped your hands over your ears and your eyes squeezed shut. Before you could even get your bearings, the noise happened again. More gunshots joined in. It was official. You probably were going to die here because of the trigger happy men around you. You tried to make yourself as small as possible and wait for a moment of silence. If that would ever come.

"Kid."

You kept your hands over your ears, even as the cacophonous shooting stopped. A hand clamped down on your shoulder. The rancid scent of rotting flesh didn't immediately hit your nose, so you knew that this was a human. You slowly opened your eyes and lowered your hands. As you stood up, you saw that Ghost, Soap, and two strangers were staring at you. You cleared your throat awkwardly.

"So… y'all always attract zombies like this?"

Ghost scoffed. "Thanks for running away. Real tough, huh?"

"Okay," You crossed your arms. "It's not my fault you decided to be an idiot and use a gun to kill a zombie."

"Enough." The man with the bucket hat and mustache stepped in front of you, blocking your view of Ghost. "Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?"

His eyes were kind and soft as they traveled over your face. His hands were on your shoulders, giving you a reassuring squeeze. A sense of comfort washed over you. It had been a while since you felt this way. You nodded silently.

He gave you a smile. "Good, good. I'm Captain John Price. You can call me Price."

Your nose scrunched and that comfort morphed into disdain. "And I'm making my leave."

"Aww, c'mon!" Soap whined your name. His lips formed a pout. "We just saved you from a horde of zombies!"

"That you guys attracted! I'm not staying with a bunch of trigger happy military freaks."

"Price…" Ghost warned, his eyes boring into yours. "Do something."

Price waved his hand to calm Ghost down. He then gave you another smile, his eyes crinkling. "Stay with us just for the night, sweetheart. You can have a shower and some food. Then after you're rested, you can make your decision."

You hesitated. You had enough food and you knew how to survive a night out here. But a shower? You looked at the group of men. Maybe while they were asleep you could snag some stuff for yourself and then leave without them ever knowing. You nodded once. Price's smile went to a full on grin filled with sunshine. 

"Great. Come this way."

The makeshift wall had a gated entrance just a couple of meters away. Your eyes widened as the group led you into their base. And it was a big base. Trucks, a tank, several buildings, and a long row of tents were spread out before you. People milled about. From soldiers to families, it looked like a whole town. A sinking feeling filled your stomach. You never did well around big groups around this. It always ended up badly. 

Your steps slowed down. "Uh… I-I think I changed my mind."

Soap linked his arm around yours. "Don't be scared, lass. We don't bite."

"That's not-"

"You're staying here and that's final." Ghost grumbled, coming up on your other side. They had blocked you in. 

"I'm so going to regret this."

[damnedspots]

cis woman. she/her. 42. ⸻ king roberon cole welcomes yvonne robertson to fabletown—or, as they were once known, lady macbeth from macbeth. before the magic mirror, they come glamoured in the mirage of a padlock upon a door lock to keep herself within, silk slip night dresses, one in black and one in white, interchangeable with a day and night wardrobe, a box of keepsakes secured on the top shelf of a wardrobe, sharp shoulder pad fashion pieces, a lipstick stain on her hand from smudging makeup, unable to fight an eyeroll when faced with statements deemed without merit. the tale from which they hail exalted their ambitious and decisive, but decried their hypocrisy and volatility in equal measure. no matter; this time, they shall write their own. in accordance with the fabletown compact, they are granted amnesty for any and all transgressions, even that which is little known: that her marriage was indeed a convenient arrangement to gain control.

mentions of child loss, grief, murder, mental illness, depression, psychosis, sleepwalking

it had all been an arrangement - two rather ambitious individuals wanting to rise up together. yvonne was hardly going to be able to do it on her own and the quicker she accepted it, the better off they'd be. the two would rise through their ranks and after several years, that thrill she felt would coincide with the attraction she felt for her husband. of course, she was more attracted to him when he was using his head and wasn't moping about but she'd grown to be slightly more accepting of his sensitive side. they were a good team.

societal pressures would always eat away at her. her own mother wanted nothing more than to have a grandchild, a grandson to succeed his father. she wasn't so sure of it - was she cut out to be a mother? every time she saw a child, lady macbeth wanted to run in the opposite direction. had she an aversion to them or was it because she wanted to get as far away from her 'rightful place', if possible... she'd managed to avoid the prospect for so long but inevitably, she fell pregnant. it was something that made her more worried than anything, when her gentlewoman made a comment that she was glowing, that she must be with child. her husband was elated with the prospect of a child, particularly a son - she shared this outlook as women couldn't get anywhere, not really. she was by his side but she was now more an accessory.

a week after their son is born, her husband has to go fight a war, bravely, willingly but that meant it took him away from the both of them. something was wrong. the child passed and he wasn't there. just when she had accustomed herself to taking a feminine role, to accept it, it was all taken away from her. she had to write to him to inform him of the news, something that she shouldn't have had to do but he still had to fight if he wanted to get the crown in the future.

her staff attempted to support her but it wasn't enough. still, they held out on fetching her a doctor for her mind in order to preserve both her image but also the grief she was feeling. he needed him back - she felt incredibly let down by him for not being there and would never quite be able to move past it. of course, her husband was heartbroken upon return, he was sensitive, but it hurt him to also see her in that way. she did need to pull herself together so she'd tap into her masculinity during the day to try hide it all from others but especially him. however, she had no control over what happened when she was asleep.

the sleepwalking would start but be sporadic, her gentlewoman keeping a watchful eye over her to make sure that she was safe. it was clear that she was suffering from an illness of the mind but approaching her could have cost them heir job or worse. she had a temper and her husband would see that when she started to emasculate him, to push him into being king because it's what they both wanted. despite this, she still saw herself as weak because she could feel it, how ugly she was on the inside so she needed to lean into it, to accept it so that both of them could come out on top.

feeling stuck with nowhere else to go, yvonne focuses on the plan - to push him so hard that he'd actually do it and they would come out on top. she'd always thought of him as quite the p*ssy... she wasn't well but he hadn't been privy to that as he knew it was always inside her, or perhaps he was but he'd chosen to ignore it. people would say that it was the guilt that 'drove her to madness' but it was already there. she'd comfort him, knowing that he'd gone through with it but then more crimes would follow and she'd be left with blood on her hands.

things took a drastic turn for the both of them and they ended up in fabletown. neither of them would utter a word about what transpired. they would get her a doctor and leave it at that. it was what was unspoken that would eventually pull them apart. there was a hatred coming from her side and her issues had been far from resolved. there had been multiple instances where he'd wake up and she'd be gone, walking in the streets somewhere as she slept. kind people would help her when they saw her laying on the streets but it was a stark contrast to how she was in her position as mayoral secretary.

her ambition was something she leaned back into, what she aspired to be like once more before she had seemingly lost it. she made sure she was still close to the power. perhaps that wasn't a good idea but she was positive she could pull it off and gain the trust of the king and bluebeard - she just can't let things go... apart from her husband. recently, she'd just had enough, completely broke down and told him that she couldn't do it anymore, not right now anyways. they're separated and yvonne always felt like she'd feel liberated by not being an extension of him but that's not entirely translated in real life. it had always been the two of them and without him to pile all of her shortcomings on, she was forced to look in the mirror and see a shell of the woman she once was - a force of nature.

now that she's alone, she's taking extra care to lock herself in at night - no one's going to notice if she's out when she's not supposed to be. her struggles at night have got worse but she's trying to manage it the best she can. it is exhausting but she has to push through to carry on proving herself. she's a control freak - she always has been and she's trying to reclaim as much as she possibly can.

there is talk that she has dabbled in magic in the past and whispers say that she could have previously been in alliance with the witches, however, none of that has ever been proven.

[anthurak]

Where do you see Sera's arc going in S2 onward? Even though she was the one who authorized Extermination Day, she seems sincerely regretful over it and largely sees it as a necessary evil to protect Heaven, unlike Adam and Lute who only carry it out for sadistic pleasure and bigotry against Demons. Do you think after seeing that redemption for Demons is possible thanks to Angel Dust and Pentious's actions she'll either change her stance or double down on her extremism out of paranoia and denial?

So I touched on this when answering your ‘Are the Exorcists a cult?’ ask a few months back, but I’m pretty sure that Sera is going to end up being one of the main villains of Hazbin.

Like considering this look, I think it’s pretty clear the only ‘sincere regret’ Sera feels related to the extermination is that Emily found out and now thinks less of her for it. I mean we already know that she was the one pulling the strings on Adam and the Exterminators behind the scenes.

I do think that unlike Adam and Lute, Sera isn’t motivated by any kind of sadistic pleasure, but rather through fear and a fixation/obsession with maintaining ‘order’, ie; ‘the status quo’. And of course is no less bigoted then Adam and Lute against demons.

I imagine Sera justifies the extermination as a kind of ‘necessary evil’ to prevent conflict between Heaven and Hell. A very ‘We NEED to keep the demons subjugated, otherwise they’ll surely rise up and make war on us!’ kind of circular justification. I also wouldn’t be surprised if Sera tries to make some kind of ‘retroactive justification’ to Emily for continuing the extermination, saying something like ‘Yes, starting the extermination in the first place may have been regrettable and hasty, but we can’t stop doing it now because if we do, the demons will surely rise up against us in anger!’.

And I think going forward we’re going to see Sera push more into a ‘knight templar’, ‘fundamentalist’ mindset, becoming more obsessed with preserving the status quo, no matter who she has to hurt to enforce it. Thus becoming in some ways even more dangerous than Adam and Lute were.

Like whereas those two were simply straightforward sadistic bigots who got off on killing sinners, I can definitely see Sera doing a lot more moralizing to justify any of her actions. Say, going on a whole ‘everything I do, I do to defend Heaven and our kind!’-type rant to Emily.

To wit, I have a pretty good feeling that Sera is going to be absolutely fucking TERRIFIED at the sight of Sir Pentious actually ascending into Heaven at the end of season 1, simply because the fact that sinners actually CAN get into Heaven is one of the massive revelations that could upend EVERYTHING in Heaven society.

Or at least that’s how Sera is likely to see it. And thus probably go to considerable lengths to keep what happened from getting out.

In fact, as both word of Sir Pentious and the truth about the exterminations start spreading among the ‘winners’ and even other angels in Heaven, I imagine we’ll start seeing quite a few sympathetic to the sinners and demons, particularly Emily, start becoming quite vocal about Heaven’s treatment of those in Hell.

And I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Sera, and other angelic higher-ups, start trying to, shall we say… SUPPRESS those outspoken voices.

As we saw in Helluva Boss, Heaven is an amazing, perfect place to live… so long as you don’t stray so much as a millimeter out of line.

[devastator1775]

Uzi needs an extra dose of TLC from Dr. N!

Summary: N is always there for Uzi. He's always more than happy to give her some affection. Especially when she's having a bad day.

The sound of the door slamming shut made N look up in surprise from the book he was reading. Was Uzi home from work already? He turned on his internal clock and found himself surprised at how late it already was. It’s funny how times flies when you’re reading “1001 surprising facts about Golden Retrievers & basic door maintenance”.

“Hi, Honey! How was your day?” N called out as he closed his book.

No answer.

“Uzi?” N called out again. Again, no reaction from her. That surprised him. Normally she would greet him and then go off about – in her own, caring words – the ‘woeful idiots without any sense of self-preservation or basic common sense’ had visited her clinic that day. No matter how much Uzi Doorman might love her job, she still hated interacting with people. It was one of the few things that never really changed since the day they’ve met, now so many years ago.

But this silence …

N stood up from the couch and made his way towards the hall. As he turned the corner he saw Uzi walking up to him. Her expression was blank – in the most literal sense, as her visor didn’t show anything. Before N could ask what was going on, she had rushed forward, closed the distance between them, bonking her head against his chest, her gaze downwards and arms wrapped around his waist.

Now this felt worrying to N. It wasn’t like that Uzi avoided affection – in fact, she could get quite cuddly when it was just the both of them lounging on the couch after a long day. While she was always very eager to accept any form of physical affection when N offered it to her, she would rarely be the one to initiate it. At least, not out of the blue, like she had done now. It wasn’t like her. Something must have happened.

“Uzi?” N asked cautiously, slowly bringing his hands unto her shoulders. “Uzi, are you okay?”

Uzi shrugged.

“Did something bad happen at work today?”

After a few nonresponsive moments, Uzi shook her head.

A soft smile tugged at the corner of N’s lips and started rubbing her shoulder. “You want me to cuddle it better?”

Uzi didn’t respond for a few moments, but eventually N felt her pushing her head harder against his chest.

A sly grin formed on N’s lips. “Well, I’ll take that as a yes.”

The soft gasp, quickly followed by the giggle Uzi made as N suddenly lifted of the ground made whatever mechanical device that resembles his heart flutter, but the way Uzi instantly clung to him nearly made him melt. She almost desperately grabbed onto his jacket, digging her fingers into the fabric. She pressed herself so tightly against him, as if she wanted her body to have as much contact with his as possible. N couldn’t help himself of blushing as she nuzzled against his cheek, moaning softly as she did. He could however feel how tense her entire body was.  

N smiled as he pulled her closer against him as he made his way towards the couch. He knew Uzi better than most people. Uzi often played it cool, presenting herself with this air of independence and self-reliance, a person who was strong and steadfast, but N saw right through that. The years without a mother caring for her, a negligent father that showed more love to doors than his own daughter and peers that wanted nothing to do with her had left a mark.

Uzi craved affection in all its forms, even more than she would admit; and N was more than happy to oblige in providing it for her.

“Woah, someone seems needy tonight.” N chuckled as he sat down on the couch, allowing Uzi to get a bit more comfortable. He could hear her grumble a response, but the way she had effectively buried her face into his chest it was barely audible. Sensing she still was tensed up, he placed his hand on her back and started softly rubbing it in a circular motion. After a few moments passed, he felt her relax. She eventually removed her face from his chest and pulled herself up to rest her chin on N’s shoulders, prompting N to start caress his fingers through her hair.

N resisted the urge to ask Uzi anything, knowing very well she’d tell him eventually what was bothering her. As on cue, he suddenly heard Uzi let out a wistful sigh.

“A mom and her daughter came by the clinic today.” Uzi spoke up. “This spry, curious kid, recently transferred from Untrained Neural Networks to a new body: one of those new “JCJenson toddler models” Tessa designed for us, y’know?.”

N hummed an acknowledging response.

“Nothing was wrong with her, too.” Uzi continued. “Just a regular check-up; seeing if the personality matrix was attuned to the new body, oil level check, things like that. Completely healthy and ready to grow up in this safe new world we helped make for her.”

“Something you should be proud of, Uzi.” N commented.

Uzi let out a soft chuckle, before sighing again.

“So …what happened?” N finally asked.

“Nothing, really.” Uzi replied. “It’s just …I was looking at how this young mom and her kid: all happy, laughing, playing games while they waited and …I don’t know, I got …envious or something?”

N waited for Uzi to continue.

“I never knew my Mom.” Uzi continued softly. “And what I eventually did ended up knowing about her …. But still, I …I sometimes wonder what it could have been if she had been around when I was growing up and that thought just …wouldn’t. Let. Go.”

N had no idea how to respond, but he felt like he couldn’t say nothing either. He was about to open his mouth to say something, but Uzi sat up, finally making eye contact with him.

“I know, it’s a dumb thing to get upset about and I shouldn’t be pouring this out on you, and-“

“Hey-hey-hey, what are you talking about?” N interrupted her, cupping her cheek and gazing softly in her eyes. “If I’m not the one you can go to when you’re having a bad day, then who will?”

Uzi smiled softly. “I know, N, but you do so much for me already and I don’t want to-“

N planted a finger on her lips, chuckling as a bright blush appeared on her visor. “And I will keep doing this for you, because I want too. Whenever, for whatever reason, you need some extra TLC, I’ll be happy to give it to you. I promise.”

Uzi opened her mouth like she wanted to say something, but nothing seemed to come out. She eventually smiled softly and leaned forward to plant a kiss on N’s lips, who eagerly accepted this. Uzi then started to nuzzle against his cheek, almost in a catlike manner.

“I don’t deserve you…” Uzi exclaimed softly, wrapping her arms around him.

“No, you do. You absolutely do.” N countered, pulling her closely against him. “You deserve receiving love and affection as much as anyone.”

N could hear Uzi sniffle. “N, I …thank you.” She kissed his cheek a few times. “A-and you do too! Maybe even more! I just wish I was as natural at it as you.”

N chuckled, endeared by her nervous tone. “Uzi, just the fact that you’re willing to try despite the trouble doing it naturally, means the world to me. You’re the world to me.”

“You’re a dork.”

“I’m your dork.”

“Wow, what an original counter argument, N.”

“It’s a classic.”

“You’re a classic!”

“That doesn’t even make sense, Uzi.”

“I know, bite me!”

“Maybe later.”

“Promise?”

Their banter went on for a while, throwing cliché sweet nothings back and forth at each other. Eventually, they fell into a comfortable silence, with Uzi resting on N’s chest. The latter was happy to see that Uzi’s mood had improved. N had just picked up his book again, when Uzi suddenly spoke up.

“N?”

“Yeah?”

“I …uh…”

“Yes?”

“I want a baby.”

“0_0”

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved in our archive

By Alana Kaufman

It started when my brain gave out on me in algebra class one January day in 2022. I couldn’t figure out a simple math problem; all I saw were numbers and symbols. My eyelids drooped, my head hurt, I could barely stay awake. Something wasn’t right.

I hadn’t felt like myself since getting COVID-19 a couple weeks earlier. Simple tasks like reading a text or standing up were draining. But what happened in that classroom scared me. At age 14, my life became a state of constant exhaustion, punctuated by doctors’ visits that, months later, would lead to a Long COVID diagnosis. Still, in those early weeks, I felt determined. I was a high-achieving student athlete always eager to accept a challenge—and I felt confident that I could get past whatever this was quickly.

That didn’t happen. And I had no idea how hard a road lay ahead—or just how dramatically the journey would reshape my perspective, outlook, goals, and relationships.

Two years after that initial episode, I’m 85% recovered. I can handle a full day of school. Brain fog and fatigue only reappear during intense projects or when I’m sick. I’ve also discovered a lot about myself, about invisible illness, and about the importance of friends and loved ones—lessons that can help anyone in the midst of a life-changing illness, as well as anyone wanting to offer help.

Here’s what I’ve learned.

Letting go is not failure I used to be a person who pushed myself academically, athletically, and personally. But with Long COVID, that only made me sicker. I knew I had to move in the opposite direction. I dropped half my classes, which felt like losing half of myself. But reducing my workload gave my body the bandwidth to heal. I hadn’t given up on life. I had simply changed my focus in order to find a new way forward. With chronic illness, slowing down isn’t quitting—it’s survival.

Small victories matter When you’re used to dreaming big and racking up achievements, it’s hard to accept that future success might look different. But chronic illness forces you to redefine what a “win” is. For me, it meant trading the goals of straight As and competitive swimming for getting out of bed and attending a couple of classes. With chronic illness, little moments like these become milestones. Celebrate them.

You can’t push through it Before I got sick, I believed that you could overcome anything with enough effort and discipline. So I attacked my illness with the same attitude, often overexerting myself in an attempt to regain my old life. But chronic illness doesn’t respond to sheer willpower. The more I pushed, the worse I felt. Sometimes, the strongest thing you can do is listen to your body and respect its limits.

Invisible illnesses are isolating People can have a hard time understanding what they can’t see. And since there was nothing visibly wrong with me, some assumed I wasn’t actually sick but had just given up on them. Friends stopped inviting me out. Teachers thought I had quit caring about schoolwork. The isolation I felt was one of the most difficult challenges of having Long COVID. Those who reached out and supported me have become some of my most treasured friends.

Healing isn’t linear The trajectory for many illnesses is to get sick, get rest, get better. But chronic illness isn’t that simple. Some days I began at 50% strength, others at 10%, and I never knew where the roller coaster would take me. The energy I felt one hour might evaporate the next. At first, my teachers and friends didn’t understand the sudden shifts. Of course, neither did I. But a low-energy day isn’t the same as not trying. It’s just part of the healing process.

Relapse anxiety can be paralyzing Even as some of my physical symptoms started to fade, I was always on high alert for a possible relapse. Every time I pushed myself a little harder, I worried that I’d end up back where I started. That fear held me back from fully re-engaging with school and activities I once loved. It was helpful to remind myself that I didn’t have to return to “normal” all at once—small, gradual progress was enough.

It can make you mentally stronger Chronic illness changes you. It forces you to slow down, rethink what success looks like, and find new ways of measuring progress. At the same time, it opens up windows into yourself and the world around you.

And what I’ve discovered is a new kind of internal strength and a new sense of self. I still pursue goals, but now they’re more personal, more purposeful. I feel more grounded in values that are authentically my own, and not based on what society expects of me. I’ve learned how to find meaning even in the face of limitations.

I’ve also developed a deeper empathy for those struggling with their own chronic illnesses. Listening without judgment, offering patience rather than pressure, and showing support without conditions: These kindnesses were key to my recovery, and they’re essential for anyone living in the darkness of chronic illness. Thanks to the examples of others, I’m now well-equipped to help those in need—and eager to repay the favor.

[rainingashes1002]

So after rereading the first few chapters to try and get back into the right headspace, I realized that honestly I worked too fast through this during a time I was very stressed and have ended up at a place where I'm just no longer happy with it BUT I have no intentions of abandoning this fic! I have a few options. I know where I'm the most unhappy is the escalation in the relationship happening so fast.

So option one, I can just edit the chapters to remove the sex scenes and mentions of them and just generally clean up the emotional part.

Option two, I could rewrite the fic starting with the third chapter. This would not be a complete rewrite as most of the fic would be preserved and scenes would just be added or tweaked to better close up some emotional things like Laios actually falling in love with Chilchuck, Laios' feelings on the baby and his dysphoria. I would also love to fix up Kabru's role in the story and his portrayal and also fix up how little Senshi, Thistle and Yaad appear. I was also clearly not thinking because a fake marriage was clearly the better plot device for this fic.

Or third option, I can just push through with the notes I have for the reconciliation chapter and the birth chapter but I'm concerned about how much time that will take me for write when I have no motivation for this direction.

So I'm curious what you guys think. I may not choose the route of the winning choice but I'm definitely going to take it into account.

Edit: Forgot to mention that no matter what I choose to do, I plan to leave the current chapters intact in some way outside of some basic edits I didn't catch the first time. I am unsure if I would just compile them into a chapter in the end or post the rewrite as a new fic or not but I don't believe in just deleting them completely

[soradayone]

It’s agonizing how quickly my emotions and thoughts have changed this last week alone. I know it’s not my fault, I know these thoughts are passing through and that they are, in fact, just temporary. 

I’ve thought a lot about whether these types of thoughts should be shared but they are, unfortunately, apart of my creative process. I think deeply, I feel deeply, and I don’t want to feel alone in that notion so it is why I force myself to share. I’ve spent the last 3 years alone in my mind, not writing, barely even drawing, and keeping everything at the right levels of suppression so that I could still function.

I am resilient. I don’t doubt myself and the work I’ve done to wear that title proudly but I am on auto pilot most of the time. Which I don’t inherently hate but I do know because of it I tend to ignore any meaningful signs of struggling. I’ve been given a life that I do not have the privilege to grieve at length. I have to be struck by the reality, acknowledge the blow, wince, and then immediately move on. And although I love to move forward because I crave ever changing growth with every fiber of my being—to feel something and then never stay there too long—in my weaker moments, I wish I could actually stay here a little longer.

I have been forced to grow and change at a rate that I feel I can never keep up with. I have been pushed by no one but myself to keep my mind at bay while my body just navigates everything else. The change both emotionally and professionally in the last 3 years alone has me clawing at my chest, desperate for air.

I’ve told myself multiple times that I don’t deserve to complain, I don’t deserve to allow myself to feel like this and I objectively and logically know the dangers of said statement. Especially because if someone else reached out to me with that same thought, I would vehemently tell them to not entertain it.

I dismiss myself quite frequently by saying tomorrow will come and that whatever I am feeling in the moment will pass. And it is true. This heaviness I feel now will dissipate and I will look back wondering how on Earth I felt it in the first place. Especially in this moment and in this horrendous time, I still love life so dearly. It happens every time and so because I have developed that self preserving habit, I rarely allow myself to document these moments at all. I believe I am a personification of strength most days, I believe it wholeheartedly but right now, I feel weak. I am allowing myself to sit in this weakness. Because I want to. There’s no excuse, there’s no extravagant explanation, I just want to be weak. Even if it’s for a little bit, even if it’s just this moment, this day or this week, I just want to be weak. 

I want the mental blocks I’ve placed on myself for years to weaken briefly enough to where I am allowed the chance to cry and grieve over whatever life I had before this new one or even the life I thought I wanted. As much as I look towards the future with an open mind and immense gratitude, please let me be weak for just a moment. 

I will move forward, I will glow and smile into the person I am most proud of but please for right now just let me cry. I have gone months without shedding tears and felt so afraid of losing that part of my humanity. To be so terrified of the possibility of being broken.

I won’t stay here, I know I won’t, I never do but if I have been given this strength please also give me this weakness. I know what comes from this pain, I know the kind of art that can be made when you embrace this, I want to illustrate the very art that is born from it, I want to write the genuine and crass words that follows. I want to matter, inspire, to love and be powerful but I want to be weak. To cry, to ask why, even when I know why, to fail, to fall and not get up immediately. Please let me be weak, more than just this once and I promise I’ll get back up but please be kind, let me catch my breath, if only for a moment.