#no actually you know what hurts more than that? she was already used to it at that point.

[the-clock-of-the-time-dragon]

So we're doing this, lol. Okay.

He is a double agent.

Literally just headcanon. As I said. Like, I think it's a GOOD headcanon — as I also said — but even you admit that it requires heavy inference and conjecture to claim that he did anything to help Animals; and slipping in "I don't think of her as a Wicked Witch" and wanting to push back against the more insane rumors is not being a double agent (which would require actual action), it's being a known contrarian and former friend of hers. As I explained to begin with: his quest to find her is not evidence of some kind of revolutionary activity behind the scenes — it's evidence that he wanted to personally reunite with her, which is exactly what his actions led to.

Fiyero knows this, by placing himself here he is in the best position both to protect Elphaba but also protect the Animals in the regime.

He didn't do either of those things though. Like, I fully believe that he wanted Elphaba unharmed (obviously) and that he had some qualms with rounding up the Animals... but he literally volunteered for the Harm Elphaba and Round Up the Animals Brigade, and there is zero evidence he did anything to undermine them until she finally showed up in the Wizard's palace unexpectedly.

Given he used the first opportunity, when they wouldn’t get in trouble, to help the Lion Cub it seems a pretty good inference that he was trying to send out warnings to Animals when he could (especially now the movieverse has made him the only character aside from Elphaba who is friends with an Animal – he probably even has a network he can tap into!).

I would like to see that fleshed out in the second movie, yes — because I agree it would be in character, but on stage, we're left to just hope that he did that (albeit his hypothetical offscreen attempts to help Animals still seem objectively outweighed by his actions that harmed them, so — again, as I said — his having sympathy for them doesn't seem to have stopped him from knowingly doing a lot more harm than good).

IDK about you, but I think if I were to search for someone wanted and was given the opportunity to both have the best resources and information to find her and hamper people who might find her and hurt her, I would totally do it this way too.

Saying you'd totally join the Gestapo instead of the Resistance if given the chance — because of "resources and information" — is not the winning argument you think it is, I'm sorry, lol. Like, if he'd already been a soldier before he realized it was fashy, that might make a bit more sense. If that were the case, then yeah he should've become a double agent! But as it is, it kinda just seems like you're making a lot of excuses for why volunteering to do fascism is justified as long as you feel bad about it and (speculatively) tried to sabotage it (with no evident success whatsoever). I would truly love to believe in Double Agent Fiyero, and I hope that's the direction the second movie goes with him: but I also really liked the Amoral Nihilist Fiyero we got on stage. You keep acting like I'm denigrating him as a character, but I can only express so many times that I'm not. He's a great character: just not a great guy imho.

I know we don’t see him helping the Animals, but nor do we really see Elphaba doing so?

No, we don't see Elphaba doing stuff to help Animals onstage (albeit, as I've said, there don't really seem to be any free Animals left by the time we get to Act II), but there are at least direct statements that she's been involved with the Animal resistance. There isn't even an implication that Fiyero tried to do that, let alone did. You're basing your interpretation of his character on speculation — because it is somewhat difficult, in some ways, to reconcile the compassionate boy we saw in the woods with the fascist commander he's become by Act II — but I'm basing my reading on sheer text; on the actions and statements on the page. Regardless of whether you choose to think he was secretly doing a ton of anti-regime work behind the scenes, I just don't think (as I've said) that the preponderance of his behavior really justifies that. Because at the very least he was still choosing to swallow his compassion and do fascist stuff at the same time, and in the end those were the actions that objectively shaped the future of Oz, not the imagined attempts at sabotage he may or may not have done. Either way, he's interesting, but his actions are hard to defend.

Does this mean he didn’t commit atrocities? No probably not. But bear in mind if he hadn’t been doing it, someone else would have.

Yikes...

He literally succeeded in the exact goal he was planning by joining the Gale Force: to protect Elphaba.

But he didn't protect Elphaba. He couldn't even fuckin find her, lol. She protected herself. While he was actively participating in the violent repression that she hated more than anything in the world.

If he hadn’t been Captain of the Guard in the throne room when the Wizard called his guards she would have been captured and killed, instead she escaped which eventually allowed the Wizard to be overthrown and Elphaba’s values to be acted on in the form of Glinda ruling.

None of which was REMOTELY planned, or even likely. Granting for the sake of argument that she would definitely have been captured and/or killed had he not been in that exact place at that exact time — I'm not convinced of that — if we're really gonna try these long-term domino effect arguments, then Glinda's questionable choice not to get on the broom was actually a heroic act that ultimately led to the liberation of Oz! Come on.

There is a difference between keeping quiet, not protesting a regime and actively endorsing it. Glinda was doing the latter and she was not forced into that. (She also was not helping undermine it the same way Fiyero was).

Yes, she was literally forced into that, lol. Claiming she wasn't forced into her position when she was literally captured and molded into an asset of the regime — and then moralizing about her trying to make the best out of her literal enslavement — whilst somehow insisting that Fiyero going out of his way to enlist as an armed servant of the regime wasn't "endorsing the regime", is actually absurd. Like, it's all well and good to believe his ulterior motives for joining make it okay, but to argue that the guy who volunteers to do the hands-on violent repression side of the regime is somehow "protesting it" because he said a couple things mildly out-of-step (so mild that he doesn't seem to have faced any official criticism for it whatsoever), while the girl we saw two seconds away from getting imprisoned or worse right before the intermission is "not forced into endorsing it"?? In what universe??

Madame Morrible made abundantly clear that the only thing keeping Glinda from being thrown to the wolves like Elphaba was serving as a pretty mouthpiece for the Wizard, and nothing more. I've got a whole list of decisions she actually, with little to no coercion, that I think are legitimately questionable. But you aren't even citing those: you're just victim-blaming because she didn't... suffer enough? Or signal against her abusers enough? Like YES, I will say there's a point where a victim can cross lines and become complicit to varying degrees in their own situation — she herself all but admits this — but unless we're going to talk specifically about those instances of dubiousness, it seems as if you're just blaming her for trying to make space for herself to breathe and not be miserable every waking moment of her... *checks notes*... forced servitude in the regime with absolute power over her life????? A victim trying to make the best of their terrible predicament is not a crime. And Glinda makes very clear that having to spread lies about Elphie is an abuse against her; it's a pain to her very soul. Saying it's her fault and that she wasn't forced into it is just... gross tbh.

But do not pretend for one moment that she is not actively complicit in this regime, with no real desire to stop it until it starts actively hurting her.

Yes, she got a lot of things that she wanted out of her arrangement. She is a complex character, after all. She's flawed. Certainly not the "perfect" victim. She also understands that Elphaba would want her to be safe and happy, and that silly (and outright wrong) rumors will not actually bring any more harm to Elphaba than what she already faces. It's a challenging situation, but Glinda chose to pursue a net positive approach: do her part to maintain her situation, make the best of it, and trust that one day Elphie would manage to set things right. She was incorrect — in the end, she had to be the one to do what Elphaba couldn't — but to claim that she was at fault for her own situation and could/should have done more to push back but just didn't want to enough (and moreover, that Fiyero somehow is NOT accountable for his much more violent, much more voluntary situation), is just perverse. The regime was actively hurting her the entire time; Fiyero certainly understands suffering and living one's best life at the same time, so don't act like it doesn't count for her.

He gave up his wealth, privilege and safety to ensure Elphaba escaped from the throne room and continued her cause (this isn’t about running away with Elphaba btw, he lost everything from the moment he pointed the gun at the Wizard). He was ready to die for her in the Corn Field scene. I don’t know what more you want him to do to prove that he was not shallow and he wouldn’t die for his cause in the exact same way Elphaba was prepared to?

He acted on spontaneous desire, as he always does, and is a nihilist who never gave a shit about any of the things (or people) he cast to the wind to begin with. "He lost everything" — and you expect me to find that brave and romantic, I take it? I don't. Throwing caution and care aside to run off and have a passionate night with the object of his affects isn't WRONG — and I've never said that it is — it's foolish and selfish and impulsive. And as I explained many times: I think it's cool that he's like that. But please do not expect me to accept your premise that these actions were deep and selfless. The actions of a depressive with nothing left to lose, recklessly pursuing the one and only object of obsession that keeps him going — irrespective of all other considerations, even hers — is actually shallow and selfish. It isn't a crime to act on passion or desperation or whatever, and as I've said, I think it's really interesting on multiple levels. Just because he's shallow doesn't mean he doesn't have layers; just not many. We can acknowledge his motives as essentially selfish and still respect that he defended her. I think we should be a little more critical and ALSO account for the consequences of his actions in ways that he did not. Why is that such a controversial suggestion?

Fiyero is the only character of the trio to put thoughts into his actions. He is the only one who doesn’t immediately act on his impulses.

Hard disagree. Like yeah, Elphaba and Glinda have their own brands and moment of impulsivity too — I wrote about it in my original post — but no, Fiyero does not think through shit. He doesn't think about the potential consequences of denouncing the rumors about Elphie; Glinda has to temper his impulse to do so. He doesn't think about the potential consequences of abandoning Glinda; for never cared about either his own safety or hers, only Elphie's. If you assume he joined in the army to be a double agent, then he clearly didn't think through or care about all the violence he was going to have to commit.

I'm not saying he isn't clever — his thoughtlessness is not a function of lacking intelligence, but of lacking concern — and I'm not saying he's reactive to denigrate him. Things happen around him, and if it's something that ignites his passion he acts boldly and fearlessly, with zero concern for anyone or anything outside of that moment. When he makes "plans", they're all very ad hoc and making resourceful use of situations that he absolutely did not (and could not) have planned for. Which is neat! Some find that bold, spontaneous, "she's all that I care for in this world" intense personality type romantic. I'm not one of them, but I can see the appeal; as I've acknowledged. I think it's a bit sad that he behaves that way tbh: because it speaks to his pretty hollow existence, as Elphaba herself identified.

[Wicked Act II spoilers]

[edited for tone and clarity of purpose, apologies for initial crudeness and frustration]

Okay, obviously I'm biased, but I'm gonna need the Fiyeraba shippers to please set a lot of your people straight about some things. I've seen way too many people trying to say that Glinda is just a selfish bimbo and that Fiyero is a virtuous and selfless figure more worthy of Elphaba's love. I'll set aside for now the idea of "worthiness" in this context. But let's start off with Fiyero joining the Wizard. Hoo boy...

Yes, he was initially somewhat less tolerant of the propaganda against Elphaba than Glinda was; yes, he was secretly trying to find her so he could run away with her or whatever. But honey: those facts DO NOT fully absolve his actions as the Wizard's top officer, or selfish recklessness throughout Act II. I see so many popular threads and posts romanticizing and whitewashing with "oh but he didn't REALLY join the Wizard, he just pretended so he could try to get to Elphie! It's all for love, and he sacrificed everything for her!" As if the literal captain of the literally fascist forces responsible for the oppression of Animals wasn't equally responsible for said oppression?? Hello? Fiyero really didn't think of seeking out Elphaba in ANY other way that DIDN'T involve becoming *checks notes*... the trusted leader of the troops committing all the abuses she's fighting against in the first place???? Like it's cool and all that he helped with Brrr, and it's all well and good that he planned on betraying the Wizard as soon as he found Elphaba (which took literal years, so I guess we're left to assume he was prepared to just keep doing fascism indefinitely if she didn't show up????), but uh... it's kind of concerning to how eager some of you are to make excuses for this dude volunteering as the head of the Ozian Gestapo??? smdh

He didn't accomplish anything from it either, by the way — like yeah, we get it, he did everything he did whilst silently fantasizing about running away with the Witch he was being paid to hunt. Fine. But I can't be the only one who doesn't buy that as an actual excuse???? Like, guys: nobody forced him to join the fascist army — even with crazy ulterior motives. He wasn't coerced into it; it wasn't his only choice or anything. Searching for Elphaba did not somehow compel him to go and volunteer to follow (or to give!) orders in the name of the dictator who was trying to have her assassinated the entire time. He could have just not done all that. (Genuinely so curious how the second film plans on covering that material tbh)

Glinda made several questionable decisions that can be (and have been) debated, but she is still very unambiguously a victim. Her position in the Wizard's regime was foisted upon her. There are things we can discuss, but I find that many folks need reminding that Glinda would undoubtedly have been disposed of (or worse) if she failed to make herself useful. I mean hell: she wasn't even supposed to meet the Wizard in the first place — she was only there because of Elphie. If she'd tried to resist, it would have immediately gotten her labeled the Witch's accomplice. As soon as she'd chosen not to get on the broom, her fate was out of her hands, and all available options were varying degrees of horrible.

That's not the case with Fiyero. He went to the Wizard all on his own; no one ever cornered or forced him into it. Thinking Animals are people, and having a crush on Elphaba, simply did not stop him from carrying out the regime's orders — for years. It's not clear exactly how long he's been captain at the start of Act II, but the clear implication is that he's been a soldier for most of the time skip. I've seen Fiyeraba accounts with headcanons about him acting as a double agent, secretly doing stuff to help Animals — and that's a great idea, it would indeed serve to make a lot of his actions way more palatable — but until we actually get to SEE some of that (maybe they'll add it for the movie version of Act II; we'll have to see), there is nothing in the story to suggest that. He certainly didn't do a damn thing for all those Animals who were enslaved and caged in the Wizard's palace — and we don't see a single other Animal outside of there in Act II, so as far as we know Fiyero has participated over those years in the near-total removal of Animals from Ozian society. In the name of "finding Elphaba". Not fighting for her cause. Just finding HER. For HIMSELF.

It's fine to have a ship you like, obviously — and there is genuinely a lot to like about Fiyeraba, I don't dislike the idea of them as a couple or as friends — but come on guys: please stop those out there idealizing Fiyero as somehow a clear "morally-superior" alternative to Glinda, lol. The dude had power, access, and opportunities, for years, that he could have wielded in any number of really selfless, revolutionary ways. He didn't. And I propose (apparently controversially): he simply didn't want to. And that — at the end of the day — is (much as some would like to deny it) true to his character. He always WANTED to be self-absorbed and shallow, and all his actions are consistent with that. Elphaba saw depth and discontentment in him, yes: but (and I cannot stress this enough) when given the chance, he channeled that in the wrong direction. He didn't confront that and become a better person — for the most part he just displaced and projected it onto Elphaba as an object of obsession, and put on an even thicker pretense than before.

All his actions — regardless of the complexity he has deep down — are those of a man who never gives one fuck about anything or anyone, except (kinda sorta) Elphaba. But even then: at no time does the care he has for her seem to extend to caring about any of her wants or needs outside of sexual validation from him, or how she might feel about his actions, or indeed the impacts of those actions upon her, her cause, or anyone or anything else. I don't think it should be all that controversial to say: he doesn't think through the wider repercussions of anything he does — thoughtlessness is just one of his core character traits. He doesn't think ahead or see meaning in anything outside of what can temporarily excite him, in the moment. I think people place a little too much weight on Elphaba clocking him with regard to his internal pain, and seem to expect (understandably of course) that she is not only right, but moreover that he will grow from that in a positive direction, based on her influence.

But he doesn't. If anything, we get a surprising inverse: he pretty much proves her wrong. Not to say he didn't have hidden depth and all that, like she said: but his hypothetical heart of gold proves not to really amount to much in practice. He doesn't grow out of his shallowness and his self-centeredness: he grows into it in a way that he hadn't quite yet in school. Where once he was only masking an internal listlessness, after he's been cracked open by Elphaba he decides to be genuinely self-absorbed and deeply shallow, not just coasting by. He performs in new ways — as a soldier, eventually as a "fiancé", etc. — but by Act II we meet a Fiyero who has staked the last remaining shred of humanity in him on the vain pursuit of the only object of his desire that has ever been unavailable to him, and firmly chosen to say to hell with everyone and everything else.

When put to the test, Fiyero sacrifices Glinda, the Animals, and all else that Elphaba actually cared about, to pursue his own unresolved crush from college. Mostly to get in her pants, really — as harsh as I'm sure that sounds. But let me be frank: that is literally all he ever accomplishes in the show. He gives her dick one time, and one of his castles, and that's it. That's the culmination of his years trying to find her — years in which he actively worked as one of the stormtroopers (or even the one commanding them) committing untold crimes against Animalkind (who, again, it seems have been all but erased from Oz by Act II): y'know, the very crimes Elphaba sacrificed her life to try and stop????? He spent the most important time of his life — of his own free will — being a fascist soldier, but he "did it for her" somehow, so according to some, it's perfectly fine. Heroic, even. Yikes??

But let's make something very clear (since my original version of this post caught a lot of flak, including slurs and other rudeness):

I like Fiyero. I find his role extremely interesting (I could do a whole dissertation on him, but I'm especially a fan of the way his proving Elphaba's assessment of him wrong presents a fascinating parallel and contrast with Glinda, which I think is lost on a lot of people). But PLEASE stop with all the misguided Glinda slander and idealization of Fiyero. By all means, thirst! But don't give me all this bullshit about him deserving Elphaba more, or being super deep, or being really principled or noble or whatever else. He does have layers, and quite intriguing ones, but his insides are straw — he isn't meant to have some deep, overwrought emotional core or motivations; he has passions that he acts upon when given the chance. That's it. And that's fine. Actually kind of refreshing in a story rooted in simple children's fantasy but rife with intensely complicated personalities. Fiyero makes it his mission to represent denial of depth and embrace of raw, spontaneous desire — and I for one love that, and wish others appreciated it.

And in all seriousness, shipping wars aside: by the end of the story, it's Glinda who is ultimately vindicated, and has — for all her faults — made the necessary choices to fulfill Elphaba's wishes, bring down the regime, etc. And all that despite herself. She's miserable: not just because of the mistakes she made, but because of her correct moves as well. Fiyero is simply not — and could never be — that person. And that's okay! Like I said: I am not anti-Fiyero. Fiyero's willingness to throw it all away for the sake of sheer, overriding passion is a huge part of what people like about him, of course — and it's an obvious factor in the attraction between him and Elphaba, because she has her own flavor of that impulse as well — but I'd actually argue that it's not romantic, it's his fatal flaw. And thematically that's fantastic! But I just don't believe that it somehow means he "deserves Elphaba more" because he "gave up his life for her" or whatever. In part because NOBODY truly "deserves" Elphie tbh, not 100% (and I question anybody who claims otherwise), but ultimately because I don't accept the idea that his fleeting acts of passion make up for all the shit leading up to them (or even proceeding after them tbh). At least Glinda managed to do what Elphaba always wanted in the end — but I would die on this hill even if Gelphie didn't exist.

You don't have to agree with my analysis of Fiyero and his choices, relationships, etc. — that's fine. What isn't fine is trying to portray Glinda as some kind of spineless traitor whore for the Wizard and Fiyero as a conscientious hero who earned Elphie through self-sacrifice. That's just not the story that was written. It's WAY messier and more interesting than that.

[vanillarosekiss]

♡ p!link ♡

can you tell i'm really craving him right now?

warnings: smut, bsfdad!simon x reader, size kink if you read into it, age gaps, not considered very ethical to fuck your bsf's dad but... :b

He was so hot. Every time you came round your best friend's house, because her dad was so accompanying, you could never take your eyes off him. You'd often go home and touch yourself to the little interactions you'd had with him the previous day, which were all innocent of course. He was just so much bigger than you, so strong, and he was extremely good looking for a guy his age. A small part of you was self conscious of the fact it was deemed morally wrong to think of him that way, you felt like it was a crime against your best friend. Although.. it wasn't like anything was going to actually happen, right?

Another Saturday night rolled around and you arrived at their house, not bothering to knock before you went inside because they were used to you coming over so much; you even knew where the spare key was.

It got quite late fast, and after a long girly talk of boys, updating each other on love life's and doing face masks whilst eating a takeaway, you got changed into your pyjamas. You both slept in her room, usually watching shitty, low-budget romcoms before drifting off into a drowsy sleep, but tonight you were restless. You decided to wait until she was asleep, and got out of bed, careful not to make too much noise.

Going downstairs to the kitchen to get a glass of water, you made the awful mistake of accidentally bumping into her dad. Simon. The sheer size of him made it almost impossible for you to not lose your balance, and he grabbed your shoulders so that you wouldn't fall over.

"Are you ok? Sorry, I didn't see you" he said calmly, checking you were alright.

You blushed a little, and nodded without saying anything. If it wasn't obvious that you had a thing for him before, it definitely was now. He was bound to notice soon anyways, your night clothes becoming slightly more revealing each week.

Simon glanced down, noticing how much of your cleavage was on display, for him. He kept his hands on your shoulders, one hand toying with the light pink elastic strap of your pyjama top.

"You don't have anything else to wear?" he asked, in what you thought was a judgemental tone.

"I- No I do, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.. like.." you rambled and trailed off, flushed with embarrassment.

"M'not complaining, love, don't worry your pretty head" he said reassuringly, before moving behind you and gently leading you into his room to the ensuite bathroom, lower hand grazing your back lightly.

"What are you-" you began, turning but only to be met with a view of his chest.

"You want this, yeah? I'm not stupid, I can tell when a pretty thing like you wants something."

You hesitated, before giving a small, unsure nod.

"Gonna need more than that, sweeth'art."

"Yes. Please."

"Good girl." he praised, before locking the door and stripping you down completely naked for him, making you turn and admiring your body.

"So pretty. Wanted this for so long, haven't you?"

You were still shy, and stood not really knowing what to do with your hands.. hell, with your entire body.

He took you carefully and got you down on your knees, before pulling his already leaking cock from his boxers. It was big, too big. It would never fit. He could immediately see the panic in your eyes, and tried to calm you down.

"S'alright, baby. I'll go gentle on you, I promise. You tell me if it hurts too much, or you get uncomfortable, okay?"

You nod, swallowing a little anxiously.

The next thing you know, you were swallowing his cock, as he guided your head down carefully. His hands caressed your hair, in an almost soothing way, so as to make you feel safe with him. You were definitely not as anxious anymore. Just took a little praise and soft guidance from Simon.

He pulled you back before he came, making you sit on his thighs before plunging into your already soaking core, stretching you out in ways you never imagined you could be. It was hard to take at first, but it quickly became pleasurable, him using you like a little toy. Thrusting you up and down on his large cock, hands grabbing at your waist and squeezing you as he hit your g-spot over and over again.

"God you feel amazing." he groaned, thrusting fastening at the sound of your preciously soft moans. He adored how little and delicate you were, so pliable in his hands.

It was safe to say that the next day, his looks and subtle lingering touches were no longer innocent. You were his pretty little secret, and unless you no longer wanted him, it would stay that way.

Tag list: @punkkture @soapisgod @slut-lmao @sebastianstans-slut @ilikeoldmen @g1rlfa1lure0 @queenoflaflames @tmartin0918 @kkloubee @goldie-221 @patricksoulmate @writingandsins @mxnee777 @caro-line19  @decaffeinateddelusionbread @poohkie90 @lovidovii @xoxoxoaspen @i-ship-stony-and-superfamily @simonrileysdarling

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Ask and ye shall receive 😝

You actually have perfect timing though because I just thought of some new themes and was going to send in more asks soon! So first we have the stories where Chris is Going Through It™️ (to very different degrees across the stories but still). In order of severity of his struggles:

🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲 (LOVING THIS ONE SO HAPPY ITS BEING PUBLISHED!! I’ve been following along the snippets the whole time but it’s so fun to read it all through and see all the parts I missed. And that last part where Eddie finally got to Chris and he’s so out of it!! So engaging I can’t wait to see the full picture of what’s happening!)

🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼 (covids getting to him :( poor kid! All three of his parents are going to help him get through it together! Also covid means we’re approaching Buckley parents’ visit territory! I’m pumped for the angst!)

🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩🪩 (oh boy the probie better not screw up the florist visit! I’m definitely worried it’s gonna go wrong! And I really want to know what Buck’s surprise is!!! This story is so adorable and sweet and funny and I’m really loving it!)

- PCA <3

THIS WORKED GREAT FOR US!

Great theme. So true. Why am I hurting him?

117 for 🌲 (THANK YOU! So glad you're enjoying it!)

---

“I have,” Adriana says. “And, wait… Eddie, you’ve killed people, too. Right?”

Eddie frowns at her. “Yes. In Afghanistan.”

“See, Mom? Eddie and I have killed. Sophia puts things down for a living.”

“Well, I do more than that,” Sophia grumbles. 

“We’ve got a sort of grit I just don’t think you have,” Adriana says. 

Eddie swallows anxiously. He’s not sure challenging her to a game of chicken is the route he’d take. But he got them this far. Maybe it’s time to pass the baton. 

“See, I don’t think any of this was thought out ahead of time,” Adriana says. “And I get that. Hell, do I ever. You’re not playing chess here, Mom. You’re just surviving. Trying to hold your little delusion together. Every decision you make is out of desperation.”

Eddie waits for Helena to reach across the table and strike her. It doesn’t happen. 

“So do it, Mom,” Adriana says. “Let him go or kill him. I don’t think you’ve really thought through what will happen if you choose the latter.”

Their mother locks her jaw. Her eyes flicker between Adriana and Ramon. There’s an incredibly tense moment where Eddie has no idea how this will go. And then enough moments pass, and he realizes Adriana is right. If Helena was serious about murdering their dad, she would have already. She’s right - it’s all been an act to hold her flimsy life together. 

“Three…” Adriana says. “Two…”

Helena opens her mouth, as if she’s about to command Ramon to do it. To stab himself. Sophia flinches. Eddie holds his breath. His mother’s mouth snaps shut. 

“One,” Adriana finishes. 

Helena exhales, defeated.

Adriana turns to their father. “Dad, you can let go of the knife now. You don’t have to listen to her, remember? You can think for yourself.”

Helena starts to cry.

Ramon inhales heavily. His eyes flicker around, conflicted. 

“It’s okay, Dad,” Adriana says. “You can let go.”

Like he’s been resuscitated, Ramon gasps and drops the knife. He stands and takes a few frantic steps backward, bumping into a cabinet and nearly knocking over some crystalware. He looks terrified. He looks small, in a way.

“What’s happening?” He demands. “Helena, what did you do?” 

Eddie looks between them both. His parents. He spent so many years afraid of them. His father especially, but his mother as well. Afraid of their judgement. Their lectures. Their hands. Their punitive attitudes towards his decisions. Their willingness to rip his son from him. And now he’s looking at them and he’s just… Unafraid. Saddened. This is pathetic. This is all so damn pathetic. 

And something in Eddie’s chest just kind of unlocks. Like a stiff joint cracking. 

“Mom,” Eddie says. “Tell him what you did.”

“No, no,” Helena begs. “Please. This doesn’t have to-”

“Tell him!” Eddie snaps. “Tell him what we are.”

Ramon looks at Eddie. Then he turns to Adriana. And the look on his face is one of pure horror. Rejection. 

Well. 

That’s okay. 

Eddie thinks he wants to reject this circus first. 

🍂

“Okay,” Buck says, putting in the address to the nearest motel in his phone map. “Repeat the plan.”

“We go to the motel. We sleep a few hours. You order me a bunch of pizza and drinks before you leave. You go get Dad, and I don’t open the door for anybody unless I physically see him.”

“Right,” Buck confirms as he pulls out of the parking lot. “I’ll leave you with Bobby and Maddie’s phone numbers. If there’s an emergency, either of them would come for you. Or-or they’d send Chimney.”

“Okay.”

“I hate even thinking about leaving you alone, but I can’t take you with me.”

“I know, Buck. It’s okay.”

“You’re sure?” Buck asks.

“Yeah,” Chris nods. “I haven’t… Uh, I haven’t felt like I could be alone for real in a while.”

---

72 for 🔼 (Well it's not alll gonna be angst... is all I can say...)

---

It goes on that way for weeks. Calls and online games mostly, but twice a week, Buck and Eddie are over in the yard, either doing garden chores, or directing Chris with his. Sometimes, when the weather is right, Shannon will lay a blanket on the opposite side of the yard and sit out there with them. Jane will sit up on the blanket, some brightly colored toy in her hand, watching them work intently and babbling little baby sounds. Eddie gets to talk to her. Gets to answer back like they’re having a conversation. 

For those weeks, Chris seems happy. Shannon seems happy. Jane, well… She’s a baby. Her mood changes with the hour. But she seems good, too. Great, even. Eddie just can’t wait to hold her again. 

“You’re in a better mood lately,” Buck observes one afternoon, driving home from gardening.

“I miss the kids,” Eddie says. “It’s just good to be with them, in whatever way we can be.”

Buck nods, smiles softly. “Yeah. You’re different after you see them. I… I love having you all the time, but I wish it didn’t have to be this way.”

Eddie exhales heavily. “Me too.”

Buck smiles again, but there’s a sad look in his eye. 

“What is it?” Eddie asks. 

“Nothin’,” Buck clearly lies.

“No, really,” Eddie presses. “What’s up?”

“I’ll just miss not being with you every day,” Buck says. “Even if I know it’s for the best.”

Eddie takes a deep breath. 

“If you think I’m letting you go, Buck… You’re crazy.”

Buck scrunches his lips to the side for a second, blushing. 

“I’d hope not,” he mumbles. 

“Definitely not,” Eddie confirms. “And, it’s not just… I mean, you’re there every time, too. You’re family, okay? I take that seriously.”

That kind of leaves Buck speechless for a second. Eddie knows he takes it seriously, too. 

v.

The last time Eddie came home - really came home, after being far away - it hadn’t exactly been his choice. He was shot out of the sky and littered with bullets and nearly died. Shannon nearly lost him. He didn’t come home. He was sent home. Not his choice. Shannon always wondered, would he have reenlisted? Would it just have kept happening, if it had been left up to him? If he hadn’t been medically discharged, when would she have snapped? What would have happened? Would she have divorced the empty side of their bed?

She doesn’t know. That’s not the point. The point is, today, after another prolonged absence - albeit not his choice or fault, and much preferable to Afghanistan - Eddie comes home as soon as he possibly can. Restrictions are lowered. Eddie takes a test. And the moment it’s clear, he’s on his way. No hesitations. No excuses. He’s just coming home. 

Shannon tells Chris. He whoops with excitement. 

“You’re sure?” He asks, giddy. 

“I’m sure,” she promises. “He’s ten minutes away, sweetie.”

Her son is so happy he starts to cry. 

---

96 for 🪩 (THANK YOU!)

---

It doesn’t quite go that way. 

Eddie wakes up to Christopher shouting. 

“NO!” 

This is a rather alarming way to be woken. Eddie, startled, nearly rolls out of bed and hops to his feet to run to him, before he remembers his foot. 

“I got it,” Buck mumbles, climbing out of bed with a yawn.

The whole point of today was for Buck to sleep in and take it easy, but what can they do? A shout like that requires some haste. Eddie can’t currently be hasty. Eddie lags behind as Buck hurries out of the room, in search of Christopher. He finds them in the bathroom. Buck’s broad frame blocks Eddie’s view inside the doorway. 

“This is horrible! Prom is ruined!” Chris complains.

“No,” Buck says gently. “No, it’s not that bad. Really!”

“What is it?” Eddie asks. “What’s going on?”

“My life is over!” Chris bemoans.

Buck sighs and steps aside, letting Eddie into the bathroom. 

“Look,” Chris points to his forehead. His forehead, where, smack in the middle, there is a massive, red zit. “It’s horrible.” 

“Oh, wow,” Eddie says dumbly.

Buck nudges him.

Christopher’s face crumples even further. 

“I mean!” Eddie leaps to fix his statement. “I mean, it’s not that bad. Wow, your reaction was… Big, because the zit is not.” 

“Oh, great save,” Buck mutters.

“You’re lying!” Chris practically whines. “It’s horrible!”

Eddie sighs. He fucked this one up.

“Okay, you know what? It’s not great.” He admits. “But prom isn’t ruined. We can fix this.” 

“Can we?” Chris asks. “Because they don’t just disappear!” 

“No. No, they don’t,” Eddie agrees. 

“But we can hide it!” Buck interjects. 

“Hide it?” Chris asks.

“Yeah!” Buck nods enthusiastically. “Yep. We can, uh… Today we can work on getting the redness down, and tomorrow we can use some makeup.”

“Makeup?” Chris asks. “I can’t do makeup! I don’t know how!”

“Well…” Eddie winces. “You must have friends that do. Ainslee does, right?”

“What?” Chris demands. “She can’t see this! She can’t know!”

“Eddie, how did you ever get a girl to take you seriously?” Buck chides. “No, Chris. Don’t worry. We’ll look it up on YouTube.”

To his question, Eddie has no idea. Realizing he’s gay was incredibly liberating, in that he never has to think about that again. And, on top of that, Buck is pretty easy to be around. No stress. No pressure. 

“YouTube,” Chris sighs. “Right. Okay. Buck, you’ll help me?”

“Of course,” Buck nods. 

“I can help, too!” Eddie insists. 

[doodler16]

Yappy Stella Anon again.

I want to have hope for her in season 3 but I simply can't. With what they've made Stella into now, she's literally too stupid to pull anything off. The theory I hate the most with her, is that Andrealphus 'always hated her' and now that he has Stolas's power he's going to kick Stella to the curb. THAT feels most likely rn, sadly. That the story will want to get rid of Stella entirely and have Andy take her place and she can be cast away and die or something. After all 🥺 it what she deserves :3 🌈 we can have our gay ice king take over now (⁠ㆁ⁠ω⁠ㆁ⁠)

Agony, makes me MAD. What I personally thought was happening in the first season was that this lack of attention Stella is getting from the story and from the characters, she was going to use that to her advantage. As it was, she wasn't threatening! Stolas didn't really care, Blitz definitely doesn't care. But Stella matters when it comes to the grimwoire, if that makes sense. In Truth Seekers when Stolas is like "If YOU get in trouble then I get in trouble. WE don't want that!" Building that if shit happens to Stolas, Blitz won't have the grimwoire, and that's obviously a problem. Stolas's problems will inevitably be Blitz's. So Stella, going under both of their radars while they deal with their personal dramas and escapades and distractions in the form of smaller antagonists, will work in the shadows to torment Stolas and have Andy more like a partner in her escapades to be The Worst Ever.

Stolas is finding happiness in this new "relationship" with the imp? She'll ruin it, seed doubt, she already knows Stolas(married for years, she knows whether she likes it or not) so she uses striker to snoop and give her information on said imp she can use to make their already failing relationship worse. Rip that away from him

The actual Octavia manipulation. That's less manipulative and more of nurturing the pain Octavia ALREADY feels from Stolas's repeated failures. Goddddd whyyyyy did they make her relationship with Octavia openly obnoxious it's a WASTE

And THEN the final scheme with Andrealphus. THEY, TOGETHER have been planning the trial to "usurp her horny ex-husband's power". It's not a last minute plan because Stella is soooo stupid. The plan from the beginning will be that either Stolas runs away with his imp, tattered relationship and no power. Or he stays in his sad terrible little life with no imp and monitored power he'll keep. But in both scenarios, he doesn't have his daughter, Octavia is still hurt. The real loss for him. And yeah this is all very Stolas focused but was willing to do that if,,,, y'know the drama was good.

:( Instead the trial is a last minute thing with no build up despite being Immensely Important, motives are just sort of tapered on to the main romance and things just sort of Happen Around Them for it to continue, Stella is wasted for her brother that randomly appeared to steal the show and be "The Mastermind" when it WAS leading for Stella to take that role(in the shadows and playing everyone on strings just because she's "Likes tormenting you!"), and I am sad. I am frustrated and sad. Does this make sense, punching the walls. Stellaaaaaa

Season 3 is supposed to be about the goetia and Stella will have her backstory, so that will be interesting. Andrealphus backstabbing Stella, I do not believe and can’t see that happening. If Andrealphus was truly that fake, he would’ve done it the moment Stolas was stripped of his powers and title. Andrealphus is a massive weirdo but bro is loyal for Stella.

Stella could’ve been cooking and scheming in the background but she doesn’t. Instead Stella is just the dumb and pretty girl. Like girl knew about the grimoire/Stolas relationship with Blitzø and didn’t use it to her advantage. That’s frustrating part. Anon, they made Stella into a cartoon villain (not in the good way, super goofy). Some people are giving Stella way too much credit than she deserves 😂

The funny thing about the Mastermind trial was that in the concept art Salem (ex Spindlehorse employee) made Stella was literally in the trial with Andrealphus. Stella could’ve done so much.

[augustifolia]

Kerosene, part 1

Summary: Emiko, the youngest Todoroki child, falls under poor influence due to her father’s ongoing neglect and emotional abuse.

Warnings: strong language, mentions of abuse and neglect, not a lot actually 🤷

"Touya," Emiko tugged at his shirt, stopping him in his tracks down the hall. Her bright turquoise eyes bore into his as she tilted her head. "Please don't be sad."

Emiko spoke those pleading words like a mantra. The constant tension in the household formed a knot in her throat. It caused a brain fog of mustard gas and stole the air from her lungs. She would say or do anything, all just to make the gnawing ache come to an end.

He forced his scowl in another direction, anywhere out of her sight. Touya pulled her off of him and stumbled into the wall.

"Go play or something, " he huffed. "or go bother Yumi. Anything, I don't care. Just leave me alone." He stormed to his room, fighting the tears that nipped at the corners of his eyes.

The five-year-old girl stood at the end of the hall dumbfounded, with a pained expression, and her arms hung to her side in resignation.

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

The dead summer sun beat down on the children as the sound of cicadas calls filled the air in the distance.

"Why's Dad always so mean to Touya? All he wants is ta' be a hero too." Her unkempt snow-white hair hid her narrowed eyebrows from view as she sat on the dirt patch poking at a cicada shell with a stick.

Fuyumi watched her with a worried expression. She wanted nothing more than to shield the youngest Todoroki from their harsh reality, to give her just a few years of a normal childhood that she and Natsuo had. But she was smarter than that. Fuyumi had already tried feeding her white lies, as well as telling her things were 'normal' or 'going to be alright', but Emiko saw through it.

In the end, she's still young. Whilst she knows these dark truths exist, how they make her feel, it grants no understanding unto what she can do to fix this cruel helyzet she was born into. What could she do? She had no standing within these walls. She was merely at the bottom of the food chain.

"Dad's just.. like that. Y'know? There's nothing we can do." She dismissed. What else could she say? Emiko always had questions beyond what anyone could answer.

She sighed. She could tell by the way Emiko drove the stick into the dirt that she wasn't pleased with her answer. She picked up the brittle shell and held it out in the palm of her hand to her sister.

"You see how the shell's empty? How the cicada crawled out and flew away a long time ago? The shell's kinda like Dad." She explained with hesitation.

Emiko looked up at her sister. Her thumbs danced with one another on the surface of where her shins met.

"But how?"

"Well.." Fuyumi felt the need to backtrack, but she knew that once something had piqued the child's interest she would chase it with persistence. She lowered her voice and continued with caution. "Dad’s missing something inside of him."

She picks up a pebble and attempts to drop it within the casing without success. "So he's looking for things that'll feel like it gave him something he didn't have."

"But- Dad's the number two hero!" Emiko blurts, her elbows stiffening into a narrow path. Her expression was desperate, as if she were telling her father himself her thoughts. "What more could he want?"

Fuyumi had expected anything but for her to take such a great understanding, causing her to stutter back. She puts her hands up in a silencing manner. "Hey, hey, not so loud, alright?"

She slumps down but nods.

Fuyumi reluctantly continued. "Dad’s wants more. So, he- uhm.." her gaze averted as if looking into an invisible dictionary. "Well.. he had kids. Us. And some of us,"

"Like Touya and Shoto?"

"Like Touya and Shoto," she acknowledges, "he trains to become strong heroes. Ones even stronger than him."

Emiko pouts. "Then why did Dad say Touya couldn't be a hero anymore? He's sad. No.. he's mad. Really mad."

"well.. Touya's quirk hurts him, you know? It's not safe."

She looks back to the dirt. "I guess.."

Fuyumi puts on a smile and pats Emiko's matted, unkempt hair. "There you go. Let's go wash up for dinner, alright?"

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

A thousand footsteps rang through the train station. The monotone voice of a woman named off the departing and approaching transits, while Emiko zones out on the ground below two men sharing a pack of cigarettes.

She'd wanted to take the day off to grieve, begged even. Father had told her that it was almost a decade ago, and she needed to get over it. "Hell week," she called it. Seven consecutive days at the age of four where her world began to crumble.

She steps onto the train, herded like animals bunched together with the rest of those getting off of school or work. She grabbed a handle overhead, burying her face deep in her outstretched arm. Her throat burned more than anything. She woke up early, sat through 8 hours of school, though she skipped her after-school training course. She had an hour-- no, less -- before she got home. All she had to do was hold it in just a little longer. Just a little longer...

The house was empty. Natsuo had completely moved out last week, into an apartment not too far. It was far enough though. Far enough that he no longer had to endure the strain in the household. Fuyumi had convinced him to leave, believe it or not. She was out late grading papers, or maybe it was a cover for staying out longer. But thats not Emiko's sister. She puts everyone over herself, and always has. That's why she thought it'd be best if Natsuo considered moving to a healthier environment to start his life. Yumi didn't mind staying behind in the family home until Shoto and Emiko aged out. "It's more time for me to get my savings in order," she swears. It doesn't make her age any faster, but it sure does help that Emiko is a grade ahead. At least in her mind, it helps.

She fumbles the key until the door opens. Hot tears prick at the corners of her eyes.

Though her status is impressive by word of mouth, it's not to say that she isn't drowning in the assignments she refuses to do and the classes she skips. While she'd originally applied for the general studies course, word had gotten out to her father that she was accepted into U.A. The man swore up and down that she wouldn't amount to anything more than Fuyumi, but when Aizawa mentioned Endeavor having two children participating in U.A, he couldn't admit that she had been neglected up until that point.

Once she gets the door open, she slams it and throws the keys down on the entry table. She forces her fingers through her tied hair and pushes herself into the wall. She was too fragile to argue today. If it weren't for her previous absences, or maybe if it were any other day, she wouldn't have gone. She hadn't noticed the entry light being on, otherwise she would've expected Shoto to turn the corner. He'd already changed into more comfortable clothes, it seems. She faces back towards the door, wiping her cheeks with her sleeves. It didn't take much to drench them. Or maybe she just had a lot pent up.

"You're home early," She mutters, trying to hide how congested she sounded. "What happened to after-school classes?"

"You didn't go." He states, pressing something icy against the back of her arm. She jumps, turning around to an outstretched gallon of ice cream and two spoons. "I thought today was a good day for a break." he offers.

She had been forced to try for the hero course, faced with her fathers raging fury and his harsh training. She couldn't remember the last time she interacted with Shoto before her father paired them to train together. After Touya had passed, Their mother hurt Shoto only a few days later. A "psychotic break," the doctors called it. Nobody talked much after that. The house was eerily quiet for weeks. She sometimes wonders if the two week rule applies to that. That maybe they just fell out of the habit of talking. It's not like there was ever a lot of time to talk. Their father secluded Shoto from the rest of the family a lot growing up. But there was always a silent understanding to never mention Emiko's quirk to their father. A silent promise of protection from her big brother.

"You shouldn't... risk getting in trouble with father for skipping class.." she mumbles as she looks over her shoulder at the tub.

"I don't care what the old man thinks. Mr. Aizawa said it was alright and it won't be counted against me." He argues, a underlying desperate tone laced into the fabric of his words.

Fuyumi and Emiko were never taken seriously. They were born of the cursed sex, Endeavor believed they had no place in the heroes world. That's not where they belonged. Emiko wasn't like the rest anyway. Endeavor already had his golden child, he had no use for her. So when she crawled into bed with Touya claiming she felt sick with a faint blue glow and delicate ice crystals crackling like fine porcelain on the surface of her skin, it became a silent agreement amongst the children to let it fly under the radar.

That night, she sat on her bed scrolling through her grades: geometry, B+; literature, A+; history, B. English, B. Science, A. Hero Course 1-B, D.

"If you can't get that F up to an A, how do I know you're not going to disgrace the family name once you're in the spotlight?" Father's words echo in her head. "You're humiliating me in front of my colleagues. I know you can do better, your quirk is more than exceptional.”

“Damn it…” she hisses. “Not good enough.”

“Just come talk to Mr. Aizawa. Maybe he can help you transfer back into general studies without him knowing.” Shoto suggests, sitting stiffly on the foot of her bed.

“No good. He watches our grade books like a hawk. Not to mention he’s in touch with Mr. Vlad.. that would just make a bunch of other issues when that plan fails. Vlad’ll wonder why I didn’t go to him, and why I’d wanna leave the hero course in the first place. That’d only get Dad in trouble unless I lied..”

“No, you’re right..” He rubbed his chin, pulling the rest of himself onto the bed in a similar cross-legged position as Emiko. “It’s not good enough to risk it.”

“What if…” She paused. Her eyes lost focus of the screen before she attracted Shoto’s gaze. “What if I dropped out altogether?” The words fell out before she considered the consequences. She broke contact, looking back at the computer. “Just a thought, y’know.” She swallowed.

“No.. No, you shouldn’t even be considering that. Transferring back to general studies is better than that. Or- Transferring to 1-A, with me.” He stands to face her fully, but she keeps her eyes down. “Emiko if you’re struggling I can help you. I’m ahead, I can-”

“Shoto quit!” she snaps, meeting his gaze once again. “I don’t want to be in the hero course.”

“Well, what do you want to do?” he retorts.

“I- well, I don’t know yet..” She stumbles over her words, “But I don’t wanna be a hero!”

Shoto keeps his eyes on hers, his features slowly softening from their panicked state. He sits back down, tracing the fabric that stretches across his knees. “Of course, you don’t wanna be a hero..” he mumbles. “I’m doing it to prove a point. I don’t expect you to do the same. But…” He turns to her, closing the laptop. She looks up at him. “You can’t drop out. Whether you pass or fail your main course, or if you tell someone about Dad, just don’t drop out, alright?”

She sits with his words for a moment, before nodding. “Yeah.. okay.”

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

“I miss you, ya’ deadbeat,” she whispers off into the cold air.

“How long’s it been?” She readjusts herself as she leans against a burnt-down wooden post. The exact place where her brother was last alive. “Ten, eleven years?” She speaks again, without response.

“I always thought you were so old. A cool teenager, or whatever. But now I’m sixteen, and you’re still thirteen.”

Another moment of silence passes.

“I’m failing my classes, y’know. My teacher said I need to ‘apply myself’. Hate to bring down the average, but I just-...” she sighs. “I can’t care.”

“...I unenrolled, today.” She admitted. The remains of the planks that used to make a house creaked and groaned, but she was used to it. It was all old and broken, and with the weather changing and the wind blowing it was to be expected.

“I’m not really sure what to do from here. I just feel.. Broken, I guess. And every time this time of year hits.. I can’t help but miss you more than anything.” She sits for another minute or so, before standing.

“I’ll.. be back tomorrow, maybe.”

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

Emiko tossed and turned in her bed. She swore she was coming down with a cold. She sat up in her bed. She was excruciatingly hot, but couldn't control how her body viciously shivered.

"Mama" she called out in a tired and sick tone, despite knowing her mother wouldn’t answer. She looked over at her sister in the bed over. It was obvious by the dark spots under her eyes that she had been up far later than anyone else so she could comfort Shoto. He had a rough day training and was littered in bandages.

She shivered, the motion causing a bead of sweat to fall from her face. She hesitantly tip-toed to the last person she knew to help her. She slid the paper door open and snuck to her eldest sibling's bed, wooden panels murmuring under her feet as she stepped.

A small blue glow pulled him from his sleep. She stood silently beside his bed, her arms wrapped around herself as she shook. Small blue flames created an aura around her figure, while intricate sheets of decorated ice patches clung to her skin.

"Touya, I'm sick.." she sniffled.

He rubbed and squinted his eyes, a tired expression the only thing acting as a backdrop.

"Emi?" He confirmed, not completely sure if he was actually awake.

She acted to crawl into bed, but the scent of burnt fabric immediately filled the air. He gasps, jumping to his feet and holding her in his arms. "Hey! Y're gonna start a fire!"

Natsuo shot up at Touya's exclamation, but Touya had already run out of the room.

As he ran down the hallway the small blue flames spread onto the surface of his skin, though it didn't burn. He dropped her into the tub and ran the bath. Touya hastily filled a cup with water and poured it over her head and shoulders. She rubbed her blue eyes and looked up at him.

He took a breath, meeting her gaze. "One hell of a fever, huh?" He laughed nervously, warranting a tired hum from his sister. She wiped the pouring water from her eyes. It had successfully extinguished the flames, but the icy crystals continued to climb her skin. Each crack sounded like porcelain. A gentle hiss when the fire went out.

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

“When were you going to tell me that you unenrolled yourself?” Enji paced back and forth as she sat at the kitchen table with her head down. “Where did you learn to forge my signature? Do you know how many strings I had to pull to get you in that class? Just for you to what, act like a delinquent? I knew you should’ve been in 1-A. It was those second-rate hero students in B, wasn’t it? If you were in A, Shoto would’ve kept you in line.” She winced as he berated her.

“Are you even listening to me?” He turned to face her. You need to understand that you’ve never been in more trouble in your life.”

“Does that mean you’re finally deciding to be a parent?”

“…”

“…”

“…call your brother.”

“Because he blocked you?”

“Because you’re staying with him until you get your shit together. I’m re-enrolling you first thing tomorrow. Until then, I don’t want to see you until you find your gratitude. Do you understand?”

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

Her sneakers struck the concrete with a steady cadence, blending seamlessly into the city's bustling symphony.

A drop of oil in a cup of water.

Why did everyone keep just a bit extra distance away from her?

Emiko grips the bag that hung over her shoulder, swaying back and forth. She lets out a sharp hiss.

“Look– I can’t get involved in family drama right now.” She recalled Natsuo’s words verbatim. “I have a girlfriend now, and well- It’s too early in the relationship to have to explain why my sister absolutely has to stay over.”

She grips the metal rung, pulling back in disgust and wiping away the wet rusty substance on her pant leg.

“He won’t actually kick you out. You two just need to back away from each other. Hold up in your room for a while, alright? It’ll blow over.”

She tosses her bag onto the roof and throws her legs over the pony wall with a huff.

“Blow over.” She growls. “Yeah, whatever.” She throws herself down and leans over the city, mindlessly trying to zero in on a person or two. A snowflake melts on the surface of her hand. Her eyebrows pinch together before she ignites the small drop of water with a large, quick flame. A burnt smell stung her nose afterward. It.. it wasn’t her fire. No.. it wasn’t fire at all. Smoke. Cigarette smoke?

“This isn’t where you said you’d be, now was it?”

She jolted, but not much more. She looks over her shoulder a bit at the silhouette.

“What, ‘re you one of my dad’s sidekicks or something?”

“As if.” The man scoffs. He tilts his head back, his teeth just barely reflecting the light of the city. “Hey, let's make a game out of it. Guess again.”

Her eyes fall back on the city with a roll and a snarl. “Guess? Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” He pushes himself off the wall and slides down a few feet away from her. He wears a casual black pair of tattered pants, boots, and a hoodie hiding his side profile. “C’mon, it’ll be fun.”

She sighs and looks back down at the people below. She just wants to be left alone to hash out her feelings, but a distraction would be nice..

“Well? Can I have a hint?” She looks over to him. She can only really see the tip of his nose and his fingers from under the hoodie. Two are outstretched, letting a lone cigarette burn.

“Tch. no. It’d be too easy.” Silence falls between the strangers. “So.. What’s someone like you doing hanging out on rooftops? It’s snowing, y’know. You’ll catch a cold.”

She pulls her knees close to her chest, watching closely as the cigarette briefly disappears behind the shield of his hood.

“You share?” She squeaked out, less confident than she anticipated.

She was immediately met with bright, scornful eyes and dark scars. Jeez, what happened to this guy?

“This?” Ash fell to the wind as he raised his hand. “What, aren’t you like twelve? ‘Do I share’, not with a kid.”

Her shoulders met her ears. More scolding. Nice. “I dunno. I figured you were… y’know.” She trails off.

“A criminal?” he grins, leaning in a bit as he presses the palm of his hand against the cold brick below.

She pauses a moment, sheepishly shrugging and looking back down. “Something like that.”

“So that means I deal Drugs n’ Crap ™ out to kids, huh? This isn't a school PSA. These things are expensive, y’know.”

“So..”

“So? No. Unless you’re payin’ f-” He’s interrupted by the sound of crinkling as she digs through her bag, then proceeds to hand him multiple wadded-up ¥5,000 bills. He stares down with awestruck eyes, before recomposing himself.

“Of course. Rich brats..” he scoffs.

“So? I can pay, I-”

He grabs the wad of cash, pieces and corners poking through the gaps of his fingers. He flips through the bills with wide eyes until his brows furrow. He looks back to her, shoving the bills in his pocket and standing. Her face drains pale.

“Wait, wait, what are you doing?” She steadies herself upright.

“I’m doing you a favor.” He readjusts his hoodie and stuffs both his hands in his pockets, checking over his shoulder. “Consider it a savings account.”

She throws herself into him, clawing at his wrist and the fabric of his hoodie.

“You can’t do that man, that’s all I’ve got!”

“Hey, hey! You said it yourself, you have a death wish or something? I’m the bad guy. Don’t give your money to strangers.” He pushes her down onto the roof off the pony wall. “Especially not guys like me.”

She glares up at him, catching her breath through gritted teeth. With slow, confident steps he makes his way to the ladder.

“Smoking’s bad for you anyway. Smarten up, yeah?”

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

She lets out a long, exaggerated sigh as she mindlessly rolls a pencil around her new desk. Her head rests downcast as students gradually enter the classroom.

Shoto hasn’t said a word to her since she got back. Maybe he just didn’t know what to say. Or maybe it was to avoid a fight. To keep the peace, or what little’s left of it.

Emiko sat in a brand new table in the far back corner. Talk had gone around the grownups about a dunce seat at the front of the class besides the homeroom teacher, but it was a short-lived idea. The man was outraged by such a thought, claiming he didn’t get paid to babysit troubled youth. Mr. Aizawa was against the idea of an extra student anyway. She had to be on her best behavior, the best in the class if she wanted to stay. She didn’t want to, but Enji did. The threat of being out of the house for good hangs over her head. “If you can’t handle staying in school,” she recounted his words. “You’ll have to learn how to live out in the world on your own.”

As the number of people in the room increases, chatter breaks out about the new student. How the amount will be uneven, or what a new student is doing joining in the middle of the year, or what to expect.

She groans, rolling the pencil more vigorously until it flies off onto the floor. She sighs, pressing her forehead to the icy surface of her desk.

Her seat was off center. Just kind of thrown in the nearest clearing. Her nearest desk neighbor being a rather tall girl with a tight black ponytail. Emiko pulled herself back up when the girl offered the fallen pencil and a formal smile.

“Momo Yaoyorozu.” She introduces.

She takes the pencil. “Thanks.” the mumbles coldly.

Emiko looks up at her with a rather tired expression, not returning her warmth. “Emiko. Emiko uhm.. Todoroki. You can just call me Emi, though.”

Shoto’s shoulders stiffen. He’s been only a few feet away from her for the past half hour and hasn’t said a word. I mean, he hasn’t seen her in days—

She’s pulled from her thought, her eyes fall back on the girl standing beside her desk with an awestruck expression.

“You’re from the Todoroki family? And you’re seated so close to you’re brother, how lucky!”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“It makes sense now, why you’re here. Why so late getting in? I can help you catch up from the past month if you’d-”

“No.” Emiko interrupts. “ I mean, no thank you. I’ll be fine.” She corrects herself.

“O-oh. well, alright. But- if you change you’re mind later on the offer’s still open.” She clasps her hands together, looking to the side before sitting down at her desk.

A group of people fly through the door right before the bell rings, taking their seats as the teacher prepares himself at the front of the class.

She liked him. So far, at least. He only spoke to her when necessary. There wasn’t a class introduction either. He had said something about pros having to make allies on their own time, and if she wanted to survive his class it would be in her best interest to put in her all. Maybe she shouldn't have been so cold with Youyorozu. She’s at the top of the class, she could have been useful.

Oh well. This class was the least of her worries. She just had to pass, not excel. She could if she wanted to of course. If she survived her fathers harsh grading growing up while she was homeschooled, she’d be just fine here. Hell, she was in the top five in general studies, and she didn’t even try.

“Todoroki.” Aizawa had been calling on her at least four times. She snapped out of her thoughts, looking up at him pinching the bridge of his nose. “Did you pick up a textbook? You have a month to catch up on, I suggest you have it readily at hand.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Alright, and your paper?’

“Huh?”

“You need to pick up whatever papers I have set out at the beginning of class.”

“Oh. Right.”

(Leaving out the awkward walk of shame up to the front of the class bc its too brutal 😔)

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

She slings her bag over her shoulder, which she swears tripled in weight since the class began. A chill ran down her spine as she walked down the crowded hall. The thought of going home was less than ideal. She was welcome back already. But for what, passive aggressive comments and more scolding?

Maybe she’d visit mom.

No, she’d just drag unnecessary stress to her mother.

Stay and knock out some chapters in this damn textbook?

She readjusts the bag into a slightly more comfortable position. Pass.

She readjusts the bag into a slightly more comfortable position. Pass.

A cafe? Get some coffee and a pastry—oh, right, no cash. Thanks for that, random mugger. Real classy.

Her steps slowed. She could try and get her money back. Why not? What’s the worst that could happen? Some guy trying to mug her again? She’d like to see him try. She had her quirk… kind of. Okay, maybe she hadn’t practiced much, but even a little fire could scare someone off, right? People usually weren’t stupid enough to mess with a Todoroki. Or so she hoped

Ahead, she sees the distinct color of her brothers hair. She pushes through people, throwing in a few ‘excuse me’s and ‘sorry’ before grabbing his shoulder.

“Shoto! Hey,”

“Oh, uhm.. Hey.”

“Hey, so you actually haven’t talked to me all day, how’ve you been?”

“I’m well. But.. maybe lay low at home.”

“Tch. I’m not going home. Not right now, anyways. Hey, you wanna help me out with something? I could use some backup.”

“Uhm, actually I should get going.. I’m not going home either. I’m studying with some friends. If… you’re not busy, i think it’d be a good idea for you to come along. We could help you catch up.”

“Nah. but thanks though. Maybe next time.”

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

Cars honked and sped by from her right as she walked down the sidewalk. It was just a bit earlier than it was the other night, but it couldn’t hurt to be early. Who knows how long he was up their before she arrived, or if he visits that roof often. What if it was just a one time occurrence? Just, a random crossing of paths maybe.

She hoisted herself up the ladder. The bag’s a no-go, it weighs as much as she does. She drops it on the first step with a heavy thud, before proceeding the rest of the way up.

She threw herself over the pony wall and took a few steps in, looking around. She didn’t smell burning cigarettes, but the night was still young.

Until it wasn't. Hours passed, just her alone on the edge of a rooftop. She played with a controlled cobalt flame at the tip of her thumb, before standing up with a huff. Three hours passed since the time they originally met. During that time she eventually brought her bag up and went through a few pages. The intro, and half of chapter two. Something about hero ethics.. Maybe she shouldn't have skimmed ahead a few extra pages. Maybe she just didn’t understand it yet. But it didn’t sit right with her. She couldn’t understand its values, much less relate to them.

She packed up her stuff and threw her bag off the roof, before climbing down after it.

Where did that— did someone spill their soda down here since she’s been up there? Eugh!

She walks down the street, bitter and defeated with a sopping, sticky bag. Great.

Her shiny new penny loafers were scuffed and scraped up all to hell on her first day back at school. Oh well. Old high-tops it is.

Of course, her blazer’s stained, too. Guess that’s why U.A sells sweater vests. Maybe not directly the reason, but it’ll work for school tomorrow.

She shoves the blazer deep into her bag. Both will be cleaned, eventually.

She sighs walking down the street. It’s cold and humid, and the guy wasn’t there. She loosens her tie as she waits at the train station.

The train hisses as it comes to a stop. She enters, grabbing a pole with the least people hanging off.

A hand nudges hers as it reaches for the bar.

Those same markings. Huh..

Really, she wants to be surprised, but she’s just not feeling it. Without looking up, she murmurs at him tiredly.

“I want my money.”

“I already told you, I’m saving it. Saving you from throwing around that much cash. Ever heard of ‘thank you’?”

“Tch, tough luck. I’m not thanking you for stealing.”

“Fine, don’t.” He rolls his eyes, extending away from the bar a bit to take note of the other passengers before leaning back in. “You don’t really believe in being a pro, right?”

Her eyes dart up to him, making him retract. He looks the other direction.

“Just saying. The face you were making while you were reading, it was—”

“You were watching me?” she furrows her brows, finally meeting his gaze.

“Shh, y’re gonna draw too much attention.”

She huffs and looks away.

“As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I saw you. You didn’t like what you saw, did you?”

“..I dunno. I didn’t read it in the right order. I was just confused. If you saw me why didn’t you say something? You did last time. How long were you there?”

“Long enough to witness you pick your nose.”

“oh.”

“So? What had you so confused? Hero work should be clear as day, right? If it were so noble or good or whatever.”

“What are you talking about? You don’t…”

“Don’t what? Question the system? Hate heroes?” He leans in slightly, the corner of his mouth twitching upward. “Come on, throw me a bone here.”

“...what’s.. The point? In following me, I mean.”

“Bold of you to assume I give a shit enough to follow you. Right place, right time, nothing more.”

She pauses. “So..”

“So?”

“So how do we keep meeting? It doesn’t fell as random as you say it is.”

“Pfft.” Everyone sways forward as the train comes to a stop. “It’s not my problem that you don’t get it yet.”

She looks back in his previous direction, but he’d already disappeared. He threw up a lazy wave before getting lost in the ocean of people.

[arcane-ish]

I get people can wish for what they want but imo any "Silco was a perfect Saint before Vander traumatized him" just never made sense to me because if how base on dialogue Vander clearly thinks Silco is capable of terrible things.

If the last thing he remembers of Silco before hurting him was Silco being just sweet and idealistic and only thinking of helping people then it doesn't make sense that he would accuse Silco of doing things for pride.

And even if you headcanon that that is Vander like diverting from himself what of him pleading with Silco not to hurt the Lanes?

If Silco was the Saint of the Lanes then people would remember him more positively, then it wouldn't make sense that Sevika goes to him because Vander is not extreme enough and Vander would not have reason to assume that Silco would ever hurt the Lanes.

"For what? Pride?" Why accuse him of that if Vander knows that Silco was motivated by kindness before?

"that was never enough for you" Suggesting that Vander remembers Silco who was demanding in their together days.

"In fighting topside, you'd sacrifice everything that we are." Again, if Vander was the violent one before and Silco was the peaceful one, wouldn't Vander say "you sacrificed everything you are/were"?

"Kill me if you have to, but please spare the Lanes." Again if Silco was the sweet one who protected people, why would Vander fear for the Lanes? If he remembers a sweet Silco why would he assume Silco would ever take things out on the Lanes?

Imo a characterisation where Silco was the nice one and Vander was the evil one who ruined him, feels guilty about that and ironically became peaceful just doesn't make sense with what we saw in season 1 where Vander very clearly thinks Silco is capable of doing bad shit.

Again this doesn't mean I assume that Vander wasn't violent or saintly before. Like I can funny buy that maybe as the more physical one he had a higher body count.

I'm not the biggest fan of the Felicia addition but the characterisation that Silco was the pushier one (but maybe still with moral qualms/still capable of being swayed) and Vander was having moral qualms or became more hesitant earlier, before their falling out imo makes perfect sense with what we were shown in season one. So, yeah, the idea that Silco was the "dove" and Vander was the "hawk" before the Drowning just imo makes no sense with the characterisation seen in season 1. The idea that they already were moving in different directions, that there was a turning point and they afterwards went more extreme in the direction they had already been moving into always was the more realistic option with what s1 showed.

To me all the people disappointed that we didn't get an arc about Vi hating Vander and realizing Silco was actually the bestest ever usually strikes me more as people being possessive/territorial about Silco rather than doing realistic extrapolation of what we saw in season 1. Especially imo the show still did do a version of "Vi doesn't follow Vander's path and Vi does gain a more nuanced view on Jinx", it's just more subtle.

Vander's "order" was protect the family/take care of Powder. And her arc is still about letting go of that idea of taking care of Powder/centering her life around protecting others. That arc wouldn't be made better by "Vi realizes that Vander was bad actually and that's why she shouldn't follow what he said".

And no, Vi never sits down and says "actually Silco was awesome/Silco was the better man/Silco rules, Vander drools". But imo she does gain a more nuanced view on Jinx. (And yes they share that moment in the mines with Vander's letter, but I don't think it's that weird that Vi is too stubborn to just turn around openly 100% but imo that she asks Jinx to use her powers "for good" shows her turnaround on Jinx the most). And with how linked Silco is to Jinx in Vi's mind imo that is all mingled together, even if it's Ekko is the one who gets explicit "seeing a different side if Silco" story rather than Vi.

(imo both girls have an arc about choosing their own paths where they don't abolish the influence of their fathers but also don't follow what their fathers would have wanted)

What I wanted from the Vander and Silco flashbacks was subversion and heartbreak.

I wanted younger Silco to be fairly peaceful, someone focused on building up resources and separating Zaun from Piltover with minimal casualties on their end. I wanted him to be someone who says "wait, bid your time, don't push until your ready" type.

I wanted younger Vander to be hotheaded, impatient, someone focused on immediate action and immediate results. Someone who says "don't wait, act, do now rather than later" type.

I wanted Vi and Jinx meeting someone who was part of the failed rebellion while trying to help Warwick-Vander. I wanted Vi to be forced to recognize that Vander wasn't always a good person and Silco wasn't always a bad person. I wanted Jinx to accept that Silco became a bad person and so did she, but people change and so could she.

I wanted a flashback where Vander tries to get rid of Silco because despite being the "Hound,' Silco is the one with the leash and is the one people follow. I wanted Vander, the bigger "brother" to take leadership by force after years of looking up to Silco and growing disillusioned by the constant "wait, we're not ready." And the fail spectacularly and see all the misery he wrought and would continue to contribute to - because the aftermath of failed uprisings involve way more death than the ones directly involved.

Imagine Vander trying to become more like Silco. Patient, contemplative, community focused. And not truly hitting the mark because he still doesn't understand that patience and pacifism aren't the same thing - the goal was war, but with preparation. Acknowledge Vander's failures and shortcomings as a leader, have him compare himself and be compared by others to what Silco once was.

Silco built the Lanes so people had a safe place. Silco owned the Last Drop and funded the rebel group through it. Silco led a rebellion in the mines. Silco got them breathers or plants to clean the air. Silco never worked with Enforcers. Silco never let a death be in vain.

I especially wanted Warwick/Vander to struggle with his past while coming back to himself. An episode just of this and nothing else, tied together by the chain of violence building up to a proper war between Zaun and Piltover with Silco's voice in Jinx's head encouraging her to become Zaun's champion. It would've been a lot better than what we got.

Making it boil down to Felicia's death just sours it all. Vander adopting random children he orphaned and changing because of HIS failure was interesting characterization. It being for his close friend's children is major downgrade. Him trying to kill his other friend because of it and NOT for a greater reason is straight trash.

Seriously, no hate to Felicia, but her being part of the friendship was pointless. How do the kids not know who Silco is if she was so close with them? Her being someone they knew through their rebel group would've been fine, but so close as depicted and yet no ties to the story otherwise? Her death being Vander's reason for trying to kill Silco? Dude claims the events on the bridge changed him - but he still ends up being a violent monster betraying Silco.

[moeblob]

Rey, who is in my very biased opinion, one of the funniest "girls" I have because she's just a guy, truly. Like Rey is just short for Reynold because he was recruited by a a goddess to help the hero she selected and the hero is conveniently Reynold's younger brother. So he agrees to help under the condition that the goddess gives him a female body for the other world. She's like "really odd flex but whatever" and gives him a female form and he's like "you know. I can't really blame anyone but myself for not specifying 'please don't turn me into a Lisa Frank personification'."

[edwinisms]

I know how it sounds at first, but I really gotta feel bad for the boys that sacrificed edwin; I mean even the term “sacrificed edwin” paints them in a more sinister light than they really deserve– considering that wasn’t really, actually their intention.

they were bullies, they were homophobic (and/or were self loathing gay boys themselves taking it out on edwin, or were equally likely peer pressured into acting a certain way), they planned something stupid and mean to do to an innocent, anxious boy with the goal of scaring the shit out of him, all because he was effeminate and an easy target. but they didn’t know or expect any of the ritual stuff to be real. they were all laughing and joking during the ritual because it was just that to them– a joke. a cruel joke, but a joke.

teenagers can be mean and stupid and they usually regret it as adults and grow out of it / grow from it. they were stifled the chance to grow out of it, at least while alive. none of those boys deserved to be instakilled and sent to hell; they’re really not that much less deserving than edwin himself. they were all just kids, after all.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

every now and then i think about my one interpretation of emma as a deeply closeted trans man radfem with a ton of internalized transphobia and antimasculism, who takes her issues with her identity out on the people around her instead of unpacking them and accepting herself. and i think, i need to draw a comic about this

[fablesuntold]

@musingmemories

How long were they going to go around in circles and wager the same war with this tiresome blame game? It was becoming tedious to play the part of a scapegoat for everyone else’s misguided actions. Just like he wasn’t to blame for people greedily lapping up the first sniff of something good when investing in Coin they barely knew anything about, he wasn’t to blame that their recent vote to stay or leave had swayed in the O’s favour to stay. And to hear her hint otherwise was a low blow even for her. How much blame could a man be expected to shoulder in this cesspool world full of imbeciles? They were all here to play the games. All here to win money and clear whatever debt loomed over their heads like a guillotine ready to drop. So why stop playing now when they were already in the midst of things? That was his thought process, as selfish as it may have seemed to some. It made perfect sense in his head.

“You can’t keep blaming me for everything wrong in your life. It’s not fair. I wasn’t the only one who pressed O and you know it. You’re just..” Angry. Hurt. And she had every right to be. They could both argue until they were blue in the face just like they had in the past, but now wasn’t the time for it. Not while in such close quarters to other players who could easily use their jaded relationship to their advantage if the opportunity presented itself.

Instead of finishing his sentence, and choosing to ignore her goading question of why he suddenly cared now when in the past he’d acted like the baby didn’t exist, Myung-gi gently shushed her while hesitantly perching himself on the edge of her bed despite the air of animosity still hanging thickly between them. “Regardless of what you might think of me now, I still do care about you. I don’t like watching you suffer, Jun-hee. So can we please be civil for one night?” Whispered once his hand settled against the round of her stomach, he practically felt his breath catch in the back of his throat. Maybe if their circumstances had turned out differently and he they hadn’t lost all of their money, they’d be one big happy family. But then again, maybe not. Myung-gi would never be able to change his ways even if he tried; money and popularity were the only things that mattered to him. Being a parent? It changed a person’s identity completely, didn’t it?

Still.. the what if of it all played in his mind.

Without realising, his gaze had dropped to where his palm had absentmindedly began to rub slow circles on the petite bump in hopes to soothe away her pain. Was he actually helping in any way? It was hard to tell, and he highly doubted Jun-hee would indicate that he was, or thank him for his efforts at least— not that he expected her to. He didn’t deserve anything from her, especially not her gratitude.

Swallowing thickly, the next words that escaped his lips surprised even himself. “Is it a boy or a girl? Or.. do you not know the gender yet?” A thought meant to remain unspoken, blurted out in the spur of the moment. “I know sometimes people have a feeling of what it could be.” While he knew he had no right to ask, it was more curiousity to than anything.. or at least that’s what he had to keep telling himself as his mind began to wonder. What would their baby look like? Would it have Jun-hee’s innocent doe-eyes and naturally pouty lips, or would it have his cute button nose and dimples? Whatever their appearance.. he hoped they turned out to be kind and caring like their mother.

Not too self-absorbed to the point of showing nonchalance to the people around him like he was so often described.

It wasn’t like he was going to be there to watch them grow up anyhow, by choice or not if the games spared him. Him and Jun-hee? There was simply no way back for them. Scorned lovers who would never find any real common ground again with everything that happened between them. And maybe that was for the best. They were toxic together. A recipe for disaster. No baby deserved to grow up in a household like that.

@musingmemories

‘I wouldn’t have this condition if it weren’t for you.’ Wasn’t that the cold hard truth? But just like the swift decline of his subscriber’s cash, this too, he refused to take full accountability for despite her best efforts trying to get him to own up. After all, it took two to tango.

“In case you’ve forgotten, we agreed to get rid of it, and you didn’t do that. You made that choice on your own. It’s your own fault that you’re still pregnant and—“ Biting his tongue in order to cut himself off before a full on row broke out between them, Myung-gi allowed himself a moment to take a breather. Was keeping the baby her way of spiting him..? Of taking back power? It was easy to get overwhelmed in a situation like this, it wasn’t exactly ideal for either of them, and far from the reunion he pictured they’d have if they ever crossed paths again. But they were here now, weren’t they? Stuck in this nightmare together. Baby or no baby, arguing about who was to blame for the past wasn’t going to help anything. If they wanted to get through these games and bag themselves enough money to finally bring some stability back into their shitty lives, this wasn’t the right path to take.

They were a team once.. why couldn’t they set aside their differences and be that again? But quite naturally.. Jun-hee wasn’t finished saying her piece just yet— apparently triggered by his poor choice of wording.. a common theme for him, accidentally provoking with his no brain to mouth filter.

“Jun-hee.” Her name a whispered warning to lower her voice, paired with a quick glance around at the bunks either side of theirs to check for nosy eavesdroppers, widened eyes shifted back to hers to find that the usual Bambi-like stare had changed into a frosty glower as he spoke again. “I don’t know!? Surely there’s.. help out there for people like you. Maybe there’s shelters that can help? You could’ve— could’ve..” Could’ve what? She was right. How on Earth was she supposed to find the money elsewhere? Shelters weren’t a long-term solution and once she’d overstayed her temporary welcome there, what then? While they weren’t on the best of terms with each other, Myung-gi didn’t want to see her end up on the streets. Not because of him.

‘Give me my answer now so I don’t have to wait around for you when I can go home.’ Never before had a single sentence made his heart plummet as much as that one had, evident in how quickly his head turned to avert his gaze to look at anything but her— a metaphorical slap to the face, or so it felt like. Did that mean.. she didn’t want to know him once they got out of here? It sure sounded that way. But he supposed that was fair and all, and he owed her an answer regardless. Closure was the least he could give her after everything. He needed to face the music for once.

However just as he’d been about to give her the straight answer she desired, one glance back at her had Myung-gi stammering to a halt before the words could even fight their way out from where they’d been lodged in the back of his throat.

Noticing the way her expression had shifted from that of disappointment to.. discomfort? He instinctively leaned up on his elbows to get a better look at her. Surely it wasn’t time already, was it? No.. no, it couldn’t be. Or was she really that far along..? “H-Hey, all this stress isn’t good for you or the.. baby. I told you, we really shouldn’t be talking about this here.” Excuse after excuse, maybe.. but honestly, Myung-gi really was concerned for her health despite the aloofness he’d shown her in the past. “Does your stomach hurt? Is there anything I can do?” Without realising it, he’d already scooted his way over to the edge of his bed, bare feet padding against the cold flooring to work his way over to hers.

While he wasn’t going to win ‘best boyfriend of the year’ or ‘best dad’ for that matter, that didn’t mean he couldn’t still be here for her now when she needed someone. Lingering somewhat awkwardly at the side of her bed, eyes trained down on the thin cotton sheet barely concealing her abdomen, it was difficult for him not to feel somewhat anxious. “Can I..?” Reaching out until his hand was hovering just above her stomach but not quite touching, Myung-gi waited with bated breath for permission.. a first step, one might say, to meeting his child for the first time.

[ourceliumnetwork]

my eternal gripe: knowing about the source of the problem(s) SHOULD allow me to stop the problem from happening again. This includes but is not limited to: car trouble, hair care, skin care, mental health, physical disability, injury, and dyslexia.

[sunsetovertheocean]

Ok, the ending of Lia's section in Twelve? I have actually never recovered from that.

[salem-witch-slut]

Prostitution (18+)

Sevika x Fem!Reader

SYNOPSIS: Of all the girls in the brothel, and she picked you.

WARNINGS: Brothel work (prostitute!reader), dom!Sevika, sub!reader, hair pulling, leather lingerie, grinding, fingering, strap-on use (r!receiving), Daddy Sevika, biting (briefly)

WORD COUNT: 2.1K

A/N: In honor of Arcane Season 2 coming out today, thought I would bring back one of my best kinktober prompts with everybody's favorite muscle mommy. Briefly considered making a part 2 for this but lemme know what you guys think?

dividers made by @cafekitsune

Why did you think this was a good idea?

Well, truth be told, you didn’t think this was a good idea… But it was the only idea you had left. Your family was dead, like everyone was in the Undercity. Your partner got herself killed from a shimmer overdose, and you were facing being homeless. Your entire world was turned upside down and it was all fucked to no end. But now you had to pick up the pieces.

You were hired at the brothel. What the actual fuck were you thinking? Well, you knew Babette, and she was willing to give you a chance. It was decent money, and you were given free food during every shift. How could you turn it down?

It was your first week and you have already been through hell. The women who came to the brothel tended to be high on shimmer and sloppy at best, but the men; they were aggressive, vicious, and you found yourself leaving with aches and pains every single night.

And yet, when you entered the room that you were assigned to today, you were surprised to say the least. The outfit on the bench was… strange. Normally, the clientele wanted something revealing, lace, and soft bright colors. No, you were given something black, made of leather, and matching black heels to complete the look.

“Don’t question it,” You told yourself. “Just put it on.”

You slowly stripped off all your clothes and pulled on the leather bustier and black lace panties. Your fingers twitched slightly as you strapped the heels to your feet and ran your fingers through your hair… Your lipstick was a deep maroon color, and you had dark, dramatic eyeliner. Seems like you thought it all out already?

Who was your client today? Why were you so nervous? What if it was a man that was three times your size? What if it was more than one man? What if you got hurt today?

“Did you hear about who she picked today?” A shiver raced down your spine as you approached the curtains in front of your door, biting down on your painted lip. Who were they talking about?

“Oh, I heard. Cute little new girl is about to get ruined today, huh?” You… they were talking about you! But who else? Who was she?

You’ll get your answer soon enough.

It felt like forever until you heard heavy footfalls in the hallways. Whispers carried in the corridors, along with the aggressive clicks of heels from your fellow ‘coworkers’ running away from whoever was making their presence known inside of the building. Your fingers trembled as you dared a peek out from behind your curtain.

Not even a second later, the curtain was being pulled back and in walked your client… Tall, muscular, handsome, and absolutely terrifying.

The brothel’s most regular visitor. Silco’s right hand… the person that everyone in the underground fears.

Sevika.

You nearly fell down the stairs, heels slipping on the concrete flooring as you tried to back away and give her the space she deserved. But it seemed she had other ideas.

Before your body could come in contact with the ground, the woman reached out and grabbed both of your hips with her hands. Her right hand was warm and calloused, a pulse beneath her flesh, but her left hand? Cold, sharp, and thrumming with the energy of her mechanical arm hidden beneath that cloak she always wears.

“Easy, doll,” Her voice is deep, husky almost as she steps forward and lowers you down to the stable surface behind you. Shivers raced down your back, and you couldn’t stop yourself from trembling in her grasp. For a moment, neither of you said anything. But then her eyes raked all over your body and she breathed, hard. “Damn, look at you… Pretty little thing all dressed up just for me?”

Were you supposed to speak? You have heard so many stories about Sevika… how aggressive and cruel she is out there on the streets, and how she kills without mercy or a care in the world. You were scared of her, to say the least… And Sevika could see it in your eyes. She knew what her reputation was and was more than happy to push the agenda.

“Scared of me?”

You inhaled sharply, your hands slowly sliding from your sides to hold onto her forearms. The whirring of the mechanics of her arm made your thighs tremble. “N-No, miss…”

“Funny,” Sevika reached down and gently ran her rough fingertips along the edge of your jaw before she slid her hand in your hair. “Only dumb girls feel no fear… Now, you aren’t dumb, are you sweet thing?”

 You breathed slowly for a second, fearing you said something wrong to her. She looked amused, but looks could be deceiving… The gap between her two front teeth was cute. You focused on the crease of her jawline, the scars on her face, and the way her brows were pulled down.

She was so fucking hot that you forgot why you were afraid… and then, she grabbed at your hair, making you yelp and submit. Your hands had slid far too high up, and she was punishing you… Fuck, she was punishing you! “Better watch it. I’m paying to touch you, not the other way around.”

“But—” You hiccupped, looking into her eyes for the briefest second. She waited for your words to continue. “S-sorry…”

“Oh, she has manners?” Sevika showed off the smile that made your stomach flutter for a brief moment and reached down with both hands, gripping your thighs and lifting you off the floor like you weighed almost nothing to her. Out of instinct, your hands reached up and grabbed onto her shoulders for stability. “We’re going to have fun.”

Before you could utter another sound, you felt something press against you… something solid, and stiff. Something that felt like it was alive, right against the wet spot on your panties. A low moan left your throat, and you just immediately knew what it was.

“Take it off, doll,” Sevika breathed against your neck. “You know you want to.”

Fingers trembled as you reached for the cloak on her shoulders and slowly pulled it over her head. The brown fabric dropped to the floor behind her, and you looked down, confirming your suspicion. Sevika was strapped under her pants… the bulge was now way more obvious without the cloak.

“Feel that?” Sevika pressed her flesh hand to your rear and stepped forward, spinning you around and sitting herself down on the couch behind you. The second you were in her lap, she was pushing you down onto her hips and grinding the bulge against your cunt like it was her damn birthright to do so.

Your pulse quickened with every passing second, and you dropped your face down against her chest, breathing in the scent of tobacco and her natural scent… Strong, earthy, like a roaring wood fire. You didn’t know what came over you, but before you could scold yourself for knowing better, your tongue came in contact with her bear neck and your lips trailed all over her exposed skin.

Sevika tensed up and her fingers went from holding your hips to sliding under the fabric of your panties, grabbing at your flesh and making you instinctively bite down on her shoulder. Nowhere near enough to hurt, but enough for her to feel it. Sevika looked like she was about to start climbing the walls as she felt your hips roll forward on top of her.

With a simple flick of her metallic fingers, the underwear given to you was ripped off your body and you barely had time to recover before Sevika was lifting you off her lap and reaching to pull the zipper of her pants down. A sigh left your throat, and you could only push your face into her neck; Sevika didn’t like that.

“Nuh-uh,” She grabbed your chin with her flesh hand, pulling you back to look down into her eyes. Her grey irises were staring directly passed your fears and into your soul. It was like she was lighting you on fire from the inside out. “You look at me. Prettiest fucking girl is going to look at me when I fuck her.”

Her words made you blush from the tips of your ears down to your neck and you almost forgot that this was your job… It was easy to think that Sevika had just picked you out of everyone in the underground to have a night with. Not… that she was paying for it.

“Don’t worry,” Sevika smirked, that crease in her brow becoming more prominent as you felt her hand leave your face and slide down between your legs. When you felt her calloused fingers against your soft wet folds, you forgot how to breathe. “Daddy’s gonna take good care of you.”

The sound you made was beyond pornographic. Two of her fingers slipped inside of your wetness without any kind of resistance. Your entire body went rigid, and your eyes fluttered for a brief second before you forced yourself to look at her. Sevika smirked and basked in your expressions, slowly pushing you up and down on her digits.

What did you even say? What were you supposed to do? Sevika isn’t like your other clients… She’s so intense, even when she’s barely touching you. It feels like you are drowning, even if it’s just her presence surrounding you. Your inner walls squeeze at her fingers as she curls them at just the right angle. Sevika smirked.

“Oh, you like that?” Sevika kept you steady on her lap with her metal hand while the other one worked in and out of your pussy. “So wet for me, already? Barely touched you, doll.”

“Fuuck...” You rolled your entire body forward, biting your lip and leaning down just enough to press soft kisses against her face. “P-Please—”

“Please, what?” Sevika said sternly. “Use your words, doll.”

“I… I n-need… ohfuck...”

“Come on,” She smirked, curling her fingers at just the right angle that you almost feel your legs give out. “Just say it—”

“Fuck me,” You whine, finally giving in. “Please, please, please… fuck me, daddy.”

There was a hunger in her eyes that wasn’t there before. It was like a switch had flipped inside of her because in mere seconds, you went from sitting on her lap to her pushing you down into the floor that was littered with pillows, blankets, anything you could desire to make this as comfortable as possible.

Sevika all but ripped her pants to try and free what had been teasing you initially. You only had a few seconds to really look at the strap around her hips before she was lining the tip of the bright purple silicone against your core.

“Pretty little thing,” Sevika growled, almost ferally as she slammed down overtop of you. Suddenly, the leather around your chest felt entirely too tight, like you couldn’t breathe. You began frantically reaching for the ties to undo the restraint on your chest, and Sevika noticed because you gasped at her ripping the ropes off the bustier and pushing the fabric apart to really look at you.

“Now, because you were a good girl…” Sevika gently prodded your opening, making you whimper and reach for her biceps. “You get a warning before you get fucked.”

“Daddy, please—”

That was her trigger. You could only grab at her muscles before she was plunging all of her strap inside of your cunt like it belonged to her. You tried to scream, but nothing came out other than a strangled squeak as your head went back on the pillows and tears filled your eyes.

You aren’t a stranger to being stretched out like this. It wasn’t like it was your first day at the brothel… but it was your first day with Sevika. She only gave you a few seconds to adjust to that cock before she was reaching down with her flesh fingers and gently rubbing at your clit.

Your soft squeaks faded into intense moans, much to the woman’s delight. She chuckled, watching you squirm and look at her like she was an alien of some sort.

“Not what you expected, doll?” Sevika teased, rolling her hips forward and making you moan like the whore you were. “Didn’t think I’d care about making you feel good?”

Very stupidly, you nodded.

“Let me fix that,” She leaned down, and you curled your fingers into the leather of her jacket before bracing yourself for the most intense workday of your entire fucking life.

“Be good for daddy and I’ll make you cum so hard that you’ll beg me not to leave.”

And that is exactly what Sevika did.

[hxxsxxng]

Past Wounds, Present Hearts P.SH

「Pairing」 : exbully!sunghoon x fem!reader

「Word Count」 : 10.5k

「Genre」 : smut, angst, somewhat fluff, college au

「Summary」 : you have felt resentment for sunghoon ever since the hell he put you through in middle school. now you find out he goes to your university.... and he's kinda hot?

「Warnings」 : MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!! mentions of bullying, lower quality of life due to bullying, self doubt, mentions of drinking alcohol, implied intoxication in some scenes, college parties, sunghoon calls reader petnames, kissing, sharing a bed, nipple play, fingering, titty sucking, handjob, sunghoon turns out to be a sweetheart, cum eating, falling asleep together, and more

「Authors Note」 : i originally intended for the story to have a different ending but i changed my mind half way though and it would have been too fast paced for the word count given, i will definitely make a part two if enough people ask! not proofread

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I hate him. The smug look on his face when I walk pass him in the main campus hall. All of the girls clawing on to his shoulder, begging for his attention without knowing what fucking loser he is. The way all of the professors are so impressed with him for doing practically nothing in class. Getting a full ride scholarship for basketball to this school. I have grown sick of it.

Park Sunghoon. The name still twists my stomach after all these years. Middle school was when my hatred started for Him. He was my middle school bully. Always teasing me in front of the whole class, or making comments behind my back. What hurts the most is that he doesn’t seem to care that he used to act this way, or maybe he thinks I have forgotten. The truth is, I will never forget. It sits at the back of my mind all of the time. The people who know me from middle school still view me as this ‘disgusting’ girl who was unlikeable, because of the things that Sunghoon would do to me.

It took years for me to build myself back up, so when I saw that he was planning on going to the same university as me last fall, I was more than worried. But this wasn’t middle school anymore. I can’t let him get away with treating me like an outcast who doesn’t deserve friends.First semester of university is always scary, I was always afraid to come out my shell and meet new people. I wanted to stay on top of acedemics. My best friend Yuqi was the complete opposite. Any opportunity she got to go out and party, she would be there. And, she would surprisingly maintain decent grades as well. Now that I think about it, I have never been a party goer, not even in highschool. Then again, there weren’t too many parties that either sounded interesting, or that I was invited to.

“Kappa Alpha is having a party this Friday, you in?” Yuqi suggested. She always gets the same response. “No, you already know I can’t, we have finals next week” I shrugged. “But Kappaaaaaa!” Yuqi whined, her voice getting higher every passing second. We were walking down the hallway towards our classes. A few students looked over, but quickly decided that they didn’t want to look any further. “I hear that Kappa Alpha has the best Christmas parties every year. You have to come” Yuqi insisted, grabbing onto my arm. I rolled my eyes. “Yuqi… You don’t actually think I’m going to attend one of their parties?” Yuqi gave me a confused stare, trying to read through my expression. “Why not?” “Sunghoon is in that frat, I’m pretty sure he lives in the frat house as well. You would catch me dead before seeing me step foot into that trashy hell hole” I explained, crossing my arm defensively. She knows how he treated me in middle school, she was there to witness it.

“What? He can’t be, out of all the parties I have gone to there, I have not seen him a singular time” Yuqi said with her eyebrows furrowed, putting emphasis into each word.. I tried to tell her that yes, he is the type of guy to hide out in the frat house and not attend, but she had no idea. After some debate, she eventually gave up asking me.

That night, I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling fan as it spun lazily above me. Yuqi's words echoed in my mind, mixing with memories I'd rather forget. The Christmas lights strung across my dorm room cast a soft glow, but they did little to brighten my mood.

I rolled onto my side, hugging my pillow close. Why did Sunghoon have to be here, at my university, in my space? It wasn't fair. I'd worked so hard to leave that part of my life behind, to become someone new. Someone stronger.

But was I really stronger if I was still letting him dictate my choices? I grabbed my phone, thumb hovering over Yuqi's contact. She was probably out somewhere, living it up like she always did. I envied her sometimes, her ability to just… exist without all this baggage.

"Maybe I should go," I whispered to the empty room. The words felt foreign on my tongue. Me? At a Kappa Alpha party? It was absurd.

I sat up, running a hand through my messy hair. Yuqi would be ecstatic if I went. And isn't that what college is supposed to be about? New experiences, stepping out of your comfort zone?

But then I imagined walking into that frat house, the pulsing music, the crowded rooms. And somewhere in there, Sunghoon. Everybody loving him not knowing the kind of cruel person he is on the inside. My stomach clenched at the thought.

"This is stupid," I muttered, flopping back onto my bed. "I don't need to prove anything to anyone."

But even as I thought it, I knew it wasn't true. I did need to prove something - to myself. That I could face my past, that I could exist in the same space as Sunghoon without falling apart.

I picked up my phone again, this time opening my messages to Yuqi. "Hey," I typed, then paused. Was I really doing this? My finger hovered over the send button as doubt crept in. But then I thought of Yuqi's excited face, of the possibility of actually enjoying myself for once.

Before I could change my mind, I quickly typed out the rest of the message and hit send. "Hey. About that Kappa Alpha party… I think I might go after all." I set my phone down, my heart racing. What had I just agreed to?​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Yuqi didn’t see my message until the morning, but I can only imagine her physical reaction after reading her written one. “Really???? I never thought this day would come. I promise you will love it!!!” my screen read. Her overuse of punctuation was telling enough about she felt. It was Friday morning, meaning that the party was going to be later in tonight. If I plan my time correctly, we can leave my dorm around 8pm, and I would have had all of the studying done that at I needed to do for the night.

I couldn’t help feeling nervous at the thought of attending a party with Sunghoon, but I decided that this may be the perfect chance to get to know him better. Okay, not ‘get to know him better’ but maybe this could finally give him a chance to clear the air between us, to apologize properly for everything that he did to me. But the chances of him apologizing are slim to none. When I see him in campus he seems to be the snobby type, unable to admit that they are wrong. Trust me, I have heard the stories going around campus.

I spent the rest of the day in a fog, my mind drifting between lectures and study sessions. The impending party loomed over me, a mix of dread and nervous anticipation.

By the time I returned to my dorm, the sun was already setting. I sat at my desk, attempting to review my notes, but the words blurred together. My phone buzzed - another excited text from Yuqi about outfit choices. I sighed, closing my textbook. There was no point in pretending to study anymore.

~~~~~

At 7:00, a knock at my door announced Yuqi's arrival. She entered with her usual whirlwind energy, arms full of clothes and makeup. "Okay," she said, dumping everything onto my bed. "Let's make you look amazing."

I eyed the pile warily. "Yuqi, I'm not trying to impress anyone. Especially not Sunghoon." She paused, giving me a soft look. "This isn't about him. It's about you feeling good about yourself. Now, let's start with this sweater."

For the next half hour, we sifted through outfits. Yuqi was patient, letting me veto anything too revealing or flashy. We finally settled on a soft, cropped sweater and high-waisted jeans - comfortable, but still party-appropriate.

As I changed, Yuqi chatted about her day, her excitement for the party. Her casual banter helped ease my nerves, reminding me why I'd agreed to this in the first place. This was about spending time with my best friend, not about Sunghoon.

We left my dorm at 8:15, the cool night air a welcome relief for my flushed cheeks. The walk to the frat house was short, but with each step, the butterflies in my stomach intensified. Music pulsed in the distance, growing louder as we approached.

Outside the house, we paused. Yuqi squeezed my hand. "You okay?" she asked, her voice gentle.

I took a deep breath, nodding. "Yeah. Let's do this."

We stepped inside, and I was immediately overwhelmed. The air was thick with the smell of alcohol and too many bodies in too small a space. Yuqi leaned close, "I'm going to get us some drinks. Will you be okay for a minute?"

I nodded, not trusting my voice. As she disappeared into the crowd, I stood there, taking in my surroundings. Groups of people clustered around, laughing and dancing. I recognized a few faces from classes, but no one I knew well.

And then, across the room, I saw him. Sunghoon, leaning against a wall, surrounded by his usual admirers. He was laughing at something someone said, his head thrown back. For a moment, I was transported back to middle school, hearing that laugh directed at me, mocking and cruel.

Our eyes met for a brief second, and I swear I saw something flicker in his expression. Surprise? Recognition? But before I could process it, someone bumped into me, breaking the moment.

I turned away, my heart pounding. What was I doing here? This was a mistake. I was about to head for the door when Yuqi reappeared, pressing a red cup into my hand.

"Here," she said with a smile. "It'll help you relax." I took a small sip, the unfamiliar burn of alcohol hitting the back of my throat. As we stood there, Yuqi chatting animatedly about the people around us, I felt myself slowly start to unwind. Maybe agreeing to come here wasn’t too bad of an idea.I was just starting to relax, the music and Yuqi's chatter creating a comfortable bubble around us, when I saw him approaching. Sunghoon, weaving through the crowd, his eyes fixed on... us? No, it couldn't be. But it was.

He stopped right in front of us, that infuriatingly perfect smile plastered on his face. "Hey, Yuqi," he said, his voice smooth as ever. Then his eyes slid to me. "And Y/N,… it's been a while, hasn't it?" I felt my body tense, my grip tightening on the red cup in my hand. Yuqi glanced between us, her eyes wide with surprise and a hint of concern. "Sunghoon," I managed to say, my voice coming out colder than I'd intended. But then again, why should I care? He seemed unfazed by my tone. "I didn't expect to see you here. You're not usually the party type, right?" The casual way he said it, as if he knew me, as if we were old friends catching up, made my blood boil. How dare he act so nonchalant after everything? "People change," I replied curtly. "Not that you'd know anything about that." I avoided eye contact. I saw Yuqi wince beside me, but I couldn't bring myself to care. Sunghoon's smile faltered for a moment, a flicker of... something passing across his face. Confusion? Hurt? Good.

"Right," he said, recovering quickly. Looking down at the ground with a half smile, he takes ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​my snarky response as a que to leave. “I’ll see you around, (Y/N)” he scoffs and walks away.

“He is such an asshole” Yuqi complains, rubbing my back as a way to try to comfort me. “You responded well” I watched Sunghoon's tall, muscular figure get lost in the crowd, a mix of emotions swirling inside me. Part of me felt satisfied with how I'd handled the encounter, but another part felt... unsettled. I took a long swig from my cup, hoping the alcohol would dull the conflicting feelings. "Thanks," I mumbled to Yuqi, grateful for her support. She gave me a reassuring smile, but I could see the concern in her eyes. "Do you want to leave? We can if you're not comfortable." I considered it for a moment. The idea of going back to my dorm, burying myself in my blankets and pretending this night never happened, was tempting. But then I thought about how that's exactly what the old me would have done. The me that let Sunghoon's actions dictate her life.

"No," I said, surprising myself with the firmness in my voice. "I'm not leaving. I have just as much right to be here as he does." Yuqi's face broke into a wide grin. "That's my girl!" she cheered, linking her arm through mine. "Let's mingle a bit, shall we?" As we made our way through the crowded room, I couldn't help but notice Sunghoon's gaze following us. Every time I glanced in his direction, he looked away, but not before I caught a flicker of... something in his eyes. It wasn't the cruel amusement I remembered from our school days. It was something else, something I couldn't quite place.

Yuqi introduced me to a few of her friends, and I found myself actually enjoying the conversations. It felt... normal. Like maybe I could do this whole college social scene thing after all. But then, over someone's shoulder, I saw Sunghoon again. He was looking right at us, his expression unreadable. Our eyes met for a brief moment, and I felt a jolt of... something. Before I could analyze it further, he quickly averted his gaze, a faint blush coloring his cheeks. Wait, was Sunghoon blushing? I shook off the thought. It was probably just the alcohol playing tricks on my mind.

As the night wore on, I found myself relaxing more and more. The alcohol helped, but it was more than that. Every minute I spent here, laughing with Yuqi and her friends, was a minute I was reclaiming for myself. Yet, I couldn't shake the feeling of being watched. Every so often, I'd catch Sunghoon looking in my direction. But it wasn't the mocking stare I was used to. There was something almost... wistful about it. Once, when our eyes met, he even offered a small, hesitant smile before quickly turning the other way. I don’t understand why he is trying to smile at me. It was confusing, to say the least. This wasn't the Sunghoon I remember. The Sunghoon who had made my life miserable. This Sunghoon seemed... different. Unsure. Almost vulnerable. As Yuqi and I were preparing to leave, I excused myself to use the bathroom. On my way back, I quite literally bumped into Sunghoon in the hallway. "Oh, sorry," he mumbled, steadying me with a hand on my arm. The touch sent an unexpected jolt through me. "You okay?" I nodded, unsureness in my voice. We stood there for a moment, an awkward silence stretching between us. "Listen, Y/N," he started, then paused, running a hand through his jet black hair. "I... I'm glad you came tonight. It was good to see you."

Before I could respond, he quickly walked away, leaving me standing there, completely baffled. It wasn't until much later, as Yuqi and I were stumbling back to our dorms, arms linked and giggling about nothing in particular, that I realized something. For the first time in years, I'd spent an entire evening in the same space as Sunghoon without letting it ruin my night. And more than that, I was left with the strangest feeling that maybe there was more to Sunghoon than I'd allowed myself to see. As I collapsed onto my bed, exhausted but oddly content, I couldn't help but feel like something had shifted. I wasn't naive enough to think one party had erased years of hurt and resentment. But maybe it was a start.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

~~~~~

The next morning I woke up disoriented, borderline hungover. Roll over to the side to check the time on my phone. 11:09AM? It honestly felt like I slept for three days with how many drinks I consumed. I look further down the screen to see the notifications:

1:18 AM: @prksnghn02 started following you!

1:19 AM: @prksnghn02 Liked your post!

I must have fallen asleep to quickly too see this last night, but that was definitely right after we left the party.

I scroll through the conversation, smiling slightly at the messages

2:11 AM: @prksnghn02 Hey! You still here?

2:11 AM: @prksnghn02 I get it if you don’t want to speak to me.

Why was he messaging me. What gives him the right? I igonore the message and delete the message request. All that before my thumb hesitantly hovered over the follow button on his profile, eventually turning it grey. I spent the weekend as usual, going to my job at night and studying in the mornings. Though I had the awkward interaction with Sunghoon at one party, I think that I could see myself going with Yuqi to another party some time. Not soon though because finals start on Monday and I have to pass to keep my financial aid. That’s another thing that pisses me off. I work day and night to pay for my schooling by myself, and Sunghoon gets it all handed to him for being okay at basketball. He teased me for growing up less wealthy than him, but if he were in my shoes, he wouldn’t have thought it was so funny.

Monday morning I was walking through the main hall on campus, where they have to coffee shop that I occasionally stop by. Of course this time when I went, Sunghoon was standing at the bookstore across the walk way, talking to his girl-toys. It took everything in me to not make things awkward by looking in his direction, but for the split second I looked that way, he was already eyeing me down. I pretended to not notice, continuing into the coffee shop line as I would do normally. The line was fairly short. I looked down at my phone to distract myself until it was my turn to order. “I am sorry (Y/N)” a familiar voice says behind me, him lightly grazing my shoulder.

My eyes immediately snap to the owner of the voice. His brown eyes were staring directly into mine as if he could tell exactly what I was thinking just by looking at me. And I know he can. ‘Hey’ he seems to say, flashing me the smallest of smirks as his hand rests on the counter to my left. I scoff in disbelief. He really is serious now isn’t he. I try to ignore him and continue with my order, but Sunghoon stops me in my tracks. My heart starts hammering harder in my chest as I glance around to make sure no one overheard. “Hey (Y/N),” he repeats, giving me his infamous smirk. “I really am sorry” he continues. He’s watching me with a curious tilt to his head as he waits for my response.

“Can I buy you a drink? Maybe we can talk some more?” For a fraction of a moment, it’s hard to believe what’s happening.

“Whatever you are trying to do, I don’t want any part of it” I said sternly, trying to shoo him away. I know he could see the annoyance on my face but that wasn’t enough to get him to leave. “Please, I want to make things right” he begged with a hint of charm in his voice. He reaches out to hold my wrist but this time instead of swatting him away, I let him. If anyone deserves an apology it should be me. He takes a step closer to me, tilting his head slightly. “Fine I guess, but do not expect to get anything out of me” I agreed hesitantly. His facial expression completely changed from worried to… relieved? We ordered together in line while I tried my best to ignore him. His scent was a distraction. It was captivating. It was comparable to mohagany and mint. Admittedly, he is tall and handsome, even when we were in middle school he had always been cute. But I would never say that out loud. Eventually, his named was called and we both went up to grab our drinks. “Thank you Sunghoon” I said while looking down, trying to get out of the situation as soon a possible. “Wait” he says before I get to far away. “I will text you” he added. I half way smiled and walked away.

~~~~~

At lunch, I found myself leaning against Yuqi as we sat at one of our tables outside. “How do you feel?” she asked. “Better” I admitted. “It’ll take some getting used to, but I think I’m doing better” She nodded, seemingly satisfied by my reply.

“Yuqi?” I spoke again once I had my full attention back on her. She turned her attention towards me expectantly.

“Why don’t you give him another chance?” she sighed, rolling her neck around. “I mean, he seems like he is genuinely trying to make it up to you.”

“Yes he is putting in the effort now, but the pain that he put me through doesn’t just go away in an instant, it will take time for me to trust him”

“I understand” she muttered.

~~~~~

A few days had passed but I had never received a message from Sunghoon. Maybe he forgot or maybe he was scared…. I don’t know. But I can’t help but to think that I was maybe looking forward to that message. Yuqi was right, maybe he does deserve another chance. The library was my number one studying location. It was quiet, I could focus, and nobody bothers me. I actually have some time to myself. I have tested out every study area here and the to floor is by far my favorite. I press the 5 on the elevator control pad, and as the doors start closing, someone’s hand is placed between the doors, causing them to shoot back open. It was Sunghoon. I awkwardly scoot to the edge of the confined space to make sure there was more than enough room between us. His eyes light up when he realizes I was the one in the elevator.

“Would it be a problem if I rode with you?” he asked hesitatingly with an awkward smile.

“No, why would there be a problem?” I replied quickly. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds after my answer, and then I heard the elevator ding and the doors slowly start closing again. God, being around him gave me mixed emotions. His aura is so captivating, but his personality is the opposite. And not to mention that mohagany scent again. We rode to the fifth floor in total silence and exited the elevator once it stopped. When we both made way out of the elevator to walk our own directions, He gently grazed my shoulder and said “Good luck with finals” and walked the other direction.

-

Later that same evening while I was still on the library, my phone pinged with a new notification.

prksnghn02: Hey are you available?

prksnghn02: I know I said I was sorry but I really want you to know how I feel. I can’t do it over text.

I think this is the message that I have been waiting to see. I would appreciate to see him and have him fully apologize, though I don’t think this is the right time. It’s the middle of finals week and lord knows I am already struggling as is. I look up from my phone, observing my surroundings, and spot Sunghoon across the almost empty room lounging on a library bean-bag. Alone. That’s a first considering his royalty equivalent status on campus. He was clearly looking at me when I opened his message.

yourusername: Hey, sorry. I really need to study for this Sociology final. I can definitely carve out a time to meet next week.

I look up at him and point at my phone, making a frowny face and his expression mirrors mine.

prksnghn02: Who is the professor? I aced my sociology class I took over the summer. If you need any help lmk.

He looks at me with a thumbs up. His offer seems tempting, but what would I do? Sit there and hear him lecture me? It would already be hard enough to pay attention given how his arms are looking in that black fitted top.

yourusername: I will think about it.

I try to focus on my sociology notes, but my eyes keep drifting back to Sunghoon. He's still lounging on the bean bag, but now he has a textbook open on his lap. Every so often, he glances up, catching my eye before we both quickly look away. The tension is palpable, even from across the room. I sigh, running a hand through my hair. This is getting ridiculous. I'm here to study, not to play this weird game of cat and mouse with my former bully turned... what? Potential friend? The thought makes me uncomfortable. I make a split second decision on impulse and grab my phone, maybe regretting my decision later.

yourusername: Okay fine, come help me.

I witness Sunghoon look at his phone and shoot up out of his seat within the span of 3 seconds. Impressive. My heart hammered a frantic rhythm against my ribs as Sunghoon practically skidded to a stop in front of my desk. It was a stark contrast to his usual nonchalance. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips, and for a moment, I was back in middle school, his laughter echoing in the halls, the same laughter that used to sting.

“So, sociology huh?” he said with the most awkward tone possible. “What do you need help with” he continues, signaling his hand towards my messy notes. My notebook has definitely seen better days. I sighed, shoving my phone into the abyss of my backpack.

"Everything feels like gibberish. Professor Ramirez throws these massive lectures at us, and it all just blends together." Surprised laughter rumbled out of him.

"Ramirez? Yeah, he can be a bit much. But trust me, sociology isn't actually that complicated. Let's see your notes." Tentatively, I slid my well-worn notebook across the desk. He flipped through the pages, his brow furrowing in concentration. The silence stretched, broken only by the soft rustle of turning paper. I snuck a peek at him. His features were softened by a focus I wouldn't have expected. "Okay," he finally said, looking up. "This isn't so bad. You've got the basic concepts down. I think you're just getting overwhelmed by the details."

Relief flooded me. Maybe I wasn't completely incompetent after all. He settled into the chair across from me, his arm brushing mine for a moment as he reached for a pen. He continued to sort through my notes, trying to piece together what I may not be understanding. He was surprisingly patient with me, and even created examples for me to try and understand better. Not to mention that I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him as he spoke. His black hair falling loosely in front of his dark brown eyes and black glasses was so sexy.

"So basically, social stratification is like the ranking system within a society?" I summarized, feeling a flicker of accomplishment. Sunghoon grinned, a genuine smile that reached his eyes. "Exactly! See, you were getting it all along." He paused, then reached for a specific page in my notes.

"Now, let's talk about power structures and how they influence social mobility…" Time melted away as Sunghoon patiently guided me through the sociological knowledge. I peppered him with questions, surprised by my own comfort level.

He answered them all with good humor and a surprising depth of knowledge that made him seem worlds apart from the bully I knew in middle school and the jock he is now. I looked at his face once again, admiring the way he furrowed his eye brows when he concentrated. I am snapped out of my trance with

“What?” Sunghoon questioned me, tilting his face to the side. I couldn’t even comprehend what had happened until a second or two later.

“Nothing! It’s nothing. Go on with what you were saying” I averted my eyes towards the table to try and hide the blood in my cheeks. “Heh, Okay….” he chuckles fiddling with the ring on his finger. He pauses for a few seconds and picks up with “You should get home soon. You don’t wanna have late nights, right?”

He looks me dead in the eye as he says this, a hint of playfulness in his gaze. I glanced at my phone, startled to see it was already 1 AM. We'd been studying for hours without realizing it. The library, usually bustling with stressed students, was now eerily quiet.

"Oh wow, I didn't realize how late it got," I mumbled, hastily gathering my notes. Sunghoon stretched, his shirt riding up slightly. I pretended not to notice.

"Yeah, time flies when you're having fun with sociology, right?" he said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at my lips. "Right, because power structures are just a barrel of laughs." As we packed up our things, Sunghoon hesitated, then asked, "Hey, um, would you like me to walk you back to your dorm? It's pretty late." I paused, considering. The old me would have immediately refused, not wanting to spend an extra second with him.

But now... "Sure," I found myself saying. "That would be nice." We stepped out into the cool night air, the campus very quiet around us. For a moment, we walked in silence, the only sound our footsteps on the pavement.

"So," Sunghoon started, breaking the silence. "Did you find the study session helpful?" I nodded, surprised by my own honesty.

"Yeah, actually. You explain things... differently than I expected." He raised an eyebrow.

"Different good or different bad?"

"Different good," I admitted. "You're more... patient than I thought you'd be." Sunghoon chuckled softly. "Well, don't sound so surprised. Im not just a handsome face ya know.” I felt a retort forming on my lips, but bit it back.

“Yeah yeah, don’t flatter yourself.” As we walked, I couldn't help but sneak glances at him. In the soft glow of the street lamps, he looked... different. Softer somehow. Less like the arrogant boy I'd built up in my mind and more like... well, just a guy. "You know," he said suddenly, his voice quiet. "I meant what I said before. About being sorry." I felt my body tense. "Sunghoon, we don't have to-"

"No, please," he interrupted, stopping in his tracks. I turned to face him, surprised by the earnestness in his eyes. "I was a jerk in middle school. More than a jerk. I was cruel, and I've regretted it for years. I just... I want you to know that. I am sorry." I stood there, stunned. This vulnerability was so at odds with the Sunghoon I thought I knew.

"I... thank you," were the only words that were able to come out of my mouth. - I turned to face towards him as we reached the enterance of my dorm building. “Okay, I guess I can take it from here” I said, grabbing my key card out of my backpack.

“Goodnight, Sunghoon.” I entered the building and the door was already halfway closed before Sunghoon grabbed it and called out behind me, "Wait!” I stopped mid step and turned to meet his curious gaze, confused by what he could possibly want to say. I gave him a questioning look as he approached me slowly. His hands fidgeted nervously, and he took one last glance around, making sure no one was watching before reaching up to touch my cheek hesitantly. His thumb brushed the area under my eye lightly, his hand moving downwards slowly until he rested his palm flat on my jaw. I was somehow okay with this, despite the butterflies in my stomach.

My heart thudded loudly against my chest as I stared at his hand resting gently on my skin, unable to tear my gaze away from his. There was something magnetic about the way his eyes bore into me with an intensity I have never felt. “Have a good night, (Y/N)” he said softly, grazing my bottom lip with his thumb. He leaned down slowly while gazing into my eyes, a soft smile gracing his lips. My breath hitched as he brought his other hand up and cradled my cheek, brushing some loose strands of hair out of my face. “You too, Sunghoon”

~~~~~

The end of finals week had finally come and I am not exaggerating when I say that this is the most relieved I have ever been in my life. I was lounging on my bed scrolling through tik tok and I saw a message pop up at the top of my screen.

prksnghn02: Hey! A few of us are having a small get-together at the frat house to celebrate surviving finals. You and Yuqi should come.

I stared at the message, my thumb hovering over the keyboard. A month ago, I would've immediately declined. But now… things were different. The study session with Sunghoon, our late-night walk, the way he'd touched my face before saying goodnight - it all swirled in my mind, a confusing mix of old resentment and new… something.

yourusername: Let me check with Yuqi. What time?

His response was almost immediate.

prksnghn02: Around 8? It's just a few people, nothing crazy. Promise it won't be like last time.

I couldn't help but smile at that. The last party had been a turning point, in a way.

yourusername: Okay, I'll let you know.

I rolled over, dialing Yuqi's number. She picked up on the second ring.

"Please tell me you're calling to drag me out of this post-finals funk," she groaned.

I laughed. "Actually, yeah. Sunghoon invited us to a small thing at the frat house. You in?"

There was a pause on the other end. "Sunghoon, huh? You two seem to be getting along better."

I could hear the smile in her voice. "We're… working on it," I admitted. "So, you coming or what?"

"Obviously," she said. "I'll be at yours in an hour. We need to talk about this Sunghoon situation, by the way."

I groaned. "There's no 'situation', Yuqi."

"Uh-huh. Sure. See you soon!"

She hung up before I could protest further. I flopped back onto my bed, staring at the ceiling.

An hour later, Yuqi was sprawled on my bed, watching me rummage through my closet.

"So," she said, drawing out the word. "You and Sunghoon, huh?"

I threw a shirt at her. "There's no 'me and Sunghoon'. We're just… I don't know. Not enemies anymore, I guess."

Yuqi sat up, her expression serious. "Look, I know he was awful to you in middle school. But people change, you know? And he seems to be really trying."

I sighed, sitting down next to her. "I know. It's just… complicated."

She bumped my shoulder with hers. "Life's complicated. Doesn't mean you can't give it a chance."

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. Yuqi always had a way of cutting through my defenses.

"Now," she said, her tone lightening. "Let's find you something cute to wear. Just because it's not a 'situation' doesn't mean you can't look hot."

I rolled my eyes, but let her pull me back to the closet.The frat house was quieter than I'd ever seen it. No pulsing music, no crowds of people. Just the soft murmur of conversation and laughter drifting from the back patio. Sunghoon met us at the door, his face lighting up when he saw us. "Hey! You made it." he said, ushering us inside. His eyes lingered on me for a moment, and I felt a flutter in my stomach. "Drinks are in the kitchen, we're all out back."

As we followed him through the house, I couldn't help but notice how different he seemed here, in his element. Relaxed, open, a far cry from the popular Sunghoon I was used to seeing on campus. He was wearing a simple black t-shirt and jeans, but somehow he made it look effortlessly attractive. The back patio was strung with fairy lights, casting a warm glow over the small group gathered there. I recognized a few faces from classes, but it was indeed a much smaller crowd than the usual frat parties.

Yuqi immediately gravitated towards a group she knew, leaving me standing awkwardly by the door. Sunghoon appeared at my side, two red cups in hand. "Here," he said, offering me one. "It's just punch, but fair warning - Heeseung made it, so it's probably stronger than it tastes." I took a sip, the sweetness masking the unmistakable burn of alcohol. "Thanks for inviting us," I said, surprised by how much I meant it. Sunghoon's smile was soft, almost shy. "I'm glad you came. I wasn't sure if you would." "Honestly? I wasn't sure either," I admitted. He nodded, understanding in his eyes. "Well, I'm glad you did. Come on, let me introduce you to some people." As the night wore on, I found myself relaxing more and more. The punch was indeed strong, but the warm buzz it provided was pleasant.

Sunghoon stayed close, always making sure I was included in conversations, laughing at my jokes, his hand occasionally brushing against mine in a way that seemed both accidental and deliberate. I found myself studying him when he wasn't looking. The way his eyes crinkled when he laughed, the gestures he made when he was explaining something he was passionate about. It was hard to reconcile this Sunghoon with the boy who had tormented me in middle school. At some point, Yuqi caught my eye from across the patio and gave me a not-so-subtle thumbs up. I rolled my eyes at her, but I couldn't help the smile that subtly appears on my face.

As the night progressed, people started to drift away in twos and threes. Yuqi had gotten into an intense discussion about some TV show with a guy from her psych class, leaving Sunghoon and me alone on a small bench near the edge of the patio. The fairy lights cast a soft glow on his features, and I found myself staring longer than I should have. "You know," Sunghoon said, his words slightly slurred, "I never thought we'd be here like this." I raised an eyebrow. "What, drunk on your frat house patio?" He laughed, the sound warm and genuine. "No, I mean... talking. Like friends."

His hand found mine on the bench between us, his fingers intertwining with mine. The touch sent a jolt through me, but I didn't pull away. "I was such an ass to you in middle school," he continued, his voice dropping low. "I... I didn't know how to deal with how I felt about you back then." I froze, my heart suddenly pounding. "What do you mean?" Sunghoon turned to face me, his eyes intense even in their alcohol-glazed state. "I had the biggest crush on you," he admitted. "But I was too stupid and insecure to know how to handle it. So I lashed out instead." I sat there, stunned.

The Sunghoon I knew in middle school, the one who had made my life miserable, had a crush on me? It didn't make sense, and yet... "That doesn't excuse what I did," he continued, his thumb tracing circles on the back of my hand. "Nothing excuses that. But I want you to know how sorry I am. And how glad I am that you're giving me a chance to make it right."

I looked at our intertwined hands, then back up at Sunghoon's face. The vulnerability in his expression took my breath away. "I... I don't know what to say," I whispered. "You don't have to say anything," he murmured, leaning in slightly. "I just wanted you to know." We sat there for a moment, the air between us charged with possibility. Then, without thinking, I leaned in, closing the distance between us. Our lips met softly, hesitantly at first. Then Sunghoon's free hand came up to cup my cheek, deepening the kiss.

It was sweet and a little clumsy, tasting of punch with a hint of alcohol. His lips were softer than I'd imagined - not that I'd been imagining it, of course. When we broke apart, I could feel the heat in my cheeks. Sunghoon's eyes were wide, a mix of surprise and something else I couldn't quite name.

"I... wow," he breathed, his thumb gently caressing my cheek. Before I could respond, the patio door slid open and Yuqi's voice rang out. "Y/N? You out here?" Sunghoon and I sprang apart, but not before Yuqi caught sight of us. Her facial expression completely changed, a knowing smirk spreading across her face.

"Sorry, am I interrupting something?" she asked, her tone teasing. I stood up quickly, nearly losing my balance. Sunghoon steadied me with a hand on my arm, the touch sending another jolt through me. "We were just... talking," I managed to say, knowing how unconvincing it sounded. Yuqi's grin widened. "Uh-huh. 'Talking.' Got it. Well, hate to break up this... conversation, but it's getting late. We should probably head out." I nodded, suddenly feeling very sober. "Right. Yeah. Let's go."

As we made our way back through the house, I could feel Sunghoon's eyes on me. At the front door, he caught my hand. "Text me when you get home safe?" he asked, his voice low. I nodded, words not being able to leave my mouth. He squeezed my hand once before letting go. - The walk back to the dorms was quiet, Yuqi mercifully holding back her questions until we were safely in my room. "Okay," she said, flopping onto my bed. "Spill. Everything. Now." I sank into my desk chair, my mind replaying the kiss over and over. "I... I don't even know where to start," I admitted.

Yuqi's expression softened. "Start at the beginning. And don't leave anything out."

~~~~~

Going over to Sunghoons frat house became a frequent thing over the winter break. About twice a week I would go with Yuqi and kick back with a few of his friends, the same ones that were there the first time.

During those times, we'd always end up hanging out in Sunghoons backyard, or playing in his pool. He definitely acted a lot different around his friends than I expected. More relaxed, open, less guarded. In turn he opened up to me a bit too.

“If I beat you in a round of pool, you have take a shot with me” Sunghoon said chuckling, nudging his elbow against my arm. “Come on, that’s fair!”

“I guess, but what do I get it I win?”

Sunghoon narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “You know what, I can think of something…” He moved closer to me, the tip of his nose inches away from mine. A shiver ran down my spine as I tried to resist the urge to pull away. Instead, I remained still, watching nervously as his mouth slowly drew closer and closer. “I think you might like it” he said teasingly.

“I guess I should just let you win then” I sighed sarcastically, trying to ignore the butterflies built up in my stomach.

He scoffs “I promise, sweetheart, I don’t bite” he said, moving back just enough so he could meet my eyes. His voice was low and husky, sending a ripple of heat through my body.

“So, what kind of shot?” I asked lightly, trying to ignore the way my voice shook as I spoke.

“I think I have some Don Julio” he mused, running a hand along the back of his neck.

Sunghoon it first to break all of the pool balls apart, declaring him as solids. Drinking beer between each of our turns and chatting about family and work, Sunghoon was a lot better at pool than he originally let on, because soon enough he had only 2 solid balls left, while I still had 5 stripes.

I was expecting him to have already won at this point. When he set his cue on the edge, lining up to hit one of the solids into a hole, the 8 ball shoots across the board, into the hole closest to me.

“Aw shit, I guess you won” He said with a fake defeated look.

I laughed, setting my bottle aside. “Looks like it. Thanks for letting me have a couple extra rounds” I said, winking at him. I missed my cue stick by mere centimeters, but didn’t care. My eyes were locked on Sunghoon; his hair stuck up everywhere, his skin glistening with sweat after his game, his shirt clung tightly to his frame.

A loud bang echoed off the walls, making us both jump slightly. Sunghoon’s eyes snapped towards the window behind me, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. “Someone just slammed the garage door shut” he whispered. “Did they close up for the night?”

We had spent so much time playing pool, we didn’t realize that slowly, one by one, people started to go home. This meaning that Yuqi probably caught a ride home with someone and the only people left here are the 3 frat guys staying in the house over the break.

“It’s getting late, I should probably call an Uber” I said, rubbing my eyes for focus.

“Why leave so soon? Doing Uber this late at night could be dangerous, you never know what kind of people could be out there.”

“What other option do I have? Yuqi went home already” I replied, grabbing my phone.

“You can stay here, you can sleep on my bed and I will set up a bed on the floor” he offered.

“I don’t know if that is the best idea” I muttered, staring at my feet.

“Just sleep here. Don’t waste money on an Uber, and I promise I can take great care of you.” he urged me, placing his hand under my chin so that I would finally look at him. “Do you really believe that I would let you get into a strangers car right now?”

I hesitated before nodding. “Fine, but only because I trust you.”

~

We pack up all of our stuff from outside, including my purse and all of the extra alcohol. There are so many room in the frat house and I have never been upstairs, I have no idea which one is Sunghoons. As the two of us climb the stairs up to his room, we both silently agree not to mention the previous events from the other night.

Sunghoon doesn’t know why I kissed him, And I don’t know why he kissed me. Even though he did tell me a little about the reason behind our relationship, it wouldn’t matter, he was too far gone for it to change anything anyway.

The moment we step into his room, he tosses his backpack onto the floor and gestures to the large queen sized bed sitting in the corner of the room.

“I didn’t bring anything to sleep in, I can’t sleep wearing jeans and a tank top” I said, gesturing to my jeans.

“Don’t worry about it, I can lend you something” he said, walking over to a laundry basket of clothes lying on the floor near the wardrobe. “I haven’t gotten the chance to put up my laundry, let me find something” he explains, rummaging through the basket.

He pulls out a large black t-shirt and some basketball shorts. “Here, try these on” and walked over, handing them to me, a slight smile tugging at the edge of his lips.

“Look away!” I playfully shouted while waving my hand to shoo him. “

“Oh my gosh, okay” he covers his eyes like a cartoon character.

Luckily I was wearing some spandex shorts and a sports bra underneath, so even if he did sneak a peek, which I’m sure he did, nothing too important would have been exposed. On him the clothes look normal size, but on me, the shirt fit like a dress and the shorts touched half way down my shins. “I guess I have no choice” I shrugged.

I crawl into his bed while he went to fetch an extra blanket for me out of his closet. At this point, he was already in his sleep attire. No shirt and some basketball shorts. It was hard to concentrate when he was standing there wearing nothing but shorts. I admit that maybe I was staring a bit longer than appropriate.

“You like what you see?” he says in a cocky tone, chuckling at my embarrassment.

“Shut up, you are so annoying” I scoff and roll my eyes, laying back down on the bed.

“Haha okay…” he smirks as he stands up from the closed with the blanket in his hand. “Hopefully this will keep you warm enough” he said, covering me with the big piece of fabric.

“Thank you, Sunghoon” I said, turning over to attempt to catch some sleep. He set up a little bed on the floor with a blanket and a pillow right next to the bed and layer down as well.

After sometime of just listening to the sound of the crickets outside, the quiet noises of the street, cars passing by, the occasional chirp of a bird. The atmosphere was rather peaceful, comfortable almost. I couldn't help the small smile forming on my face as I lay my head on my arm.

My brain kept drifting away from sleep, my thoughts constantly drifting back to Sunghoon. My heart rate was rising with every second that passed, I tried desperately to calm myself down, not wanting to give any indication that I was starting to get aroused. The more I listened to the sounds outside, the more I felt the overwhelming desire to be wrapped up in his arms. Just to feel him hold me.

I sigh deeply, rolling over onto my side and facing him. The soft glow of moonlight illuminating the entire room, casting light patterns on his sleeping features. If this was any other day, I would definitely stare at him until dawn, taking in every minute detail of him.

I scooted over to the edge of the bed, just close enough for me to nudge Sunghoon with my foot. “Hoon, are you awake” I whispered.

His eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the brightness of the moonlight leaking through the blinds. “Yeah” he clears his throat. “Why?”

“Can you lay with me?” I whispered again.

He stared at me for a second, trying to understand what was going through my mind. Eventually, he crawled onto the bed, lying down next to me. His body was hot against mine, making goosebumps erupt throughout my skin, but the feeling was comforting nevertheless. We laid like that in silence for a few moments, simply enjoying each other's presence.

Eventually, it became too awkward and I had to move closer into Sunghoon, cuddling up next to him. “I like this” I say quietly, resting my head in the crook of his neck, inhaling his faint scent. He chuckled slightly, positioning himself to where his fingers could comb though my hair.

I mumble, wrapping my arm around his torso. His fingers stopped their ministrations then, hesitating for a moment. I looked up at him from my position on his chest, curious as to what made him stop. I met his deep brown eyes that were focused solely on me. His gaze was soft, yet intimidating at the same time. Slowly, carefully, he lifted my head off his body and held it between his hands. Then he brought his lips to meet mine softly.

He pulled me in closer, gently running his fingertips along my jawline, making my heartbeat pick up in pace. His kisses were slow and sweet, the most tender kiss I've ever had. After several seconds of pure bliss, he pulled away slowly, watching me as if waiting for some sort of reaction. When my eyes fluttered open I met with his eyes, gazing deeply into each others’. A smile formed on my lips, making Sunghoon lean in to reconnect our lips again.

He placed his hands on the sides of my neck, holding me close to him, deepening the kiss, our tongues intertwining in a passionate dance. Our bodies pressed closely together, moving together rhythmically. His hands lifted up my oversized shorts and began roaming across my bare thighs, tracing up the hem of my shirt. We kept getting tangled in each other’s clothing as we continued kissing.

He reached my breasts, pushing up my sports bra to give them an affectionate squeeze, causing me to gasp in response. My hands moved down from his shoulders and ran up the backs of his arms to his neck, pulling on his short hairs slightly. Pulling on the strands of hair caused him to release a low growl and deepen the kiss, pulling his tongue into my mouth. Suddenly I felt his teeth graze my bottom lip, causing me to whimper slightly at the unexpected pain. When he released my lower lip, he sucked on it, sucking on it harder and harder with his sharp canine teeth. “Fuck…” I moan, gripping tightly onto the ends of his dark brown locks.

He took the opportunity to slide his hands under my shirt, rubbing his thumbs over my nipples lightly, causing my stomach muscles to tense up involuntarily. A slight smirk crept onto his lips as he noticed this, but then he proceeded to push the crop top further up on my shoulders before placing soft gentle kisses along my collar bone. He sprinkled kissed on my shoulders and chest and then moved down towards my waistline, placing soft soft kisses along my belly button. His hand started to work its way downwards, slowly caressing the insides of my thighs.

He latched one of my nipples into his mouth, gently suckling the tight swollen bud of flesh with his teeth and tongue. As his hand reached down and slid his middle finger along the underside of my left thigh, causing me to grind against his hand.

He trailed his hand back up to the bottom of my shirts and bunched it up in his hand “Can I take this off?” he leaned next to my ear and whispered. My breath hitched at how sensual he sounded.

“Please” I managed to speak out. He didn’t reply immediately, only gave me a reassuring smile before pulling it over my head, only leaving my bra. His lips found their way back up to mine, sending a surge of electricity through me. His hands worked their way to bottom of my bra, lifting it up and throwing it to the side as well. The cool air on my bare stomach and chest suddenly sent tingles all over my body, sending shivers down my spine and goosebumps all over my skin. He smiled at my reaction, continuing to caress my inner thigh.

“Is it okay if I take these off too?” he whispered, grazing the waistband of my shorts.

I let go of his arms and nodded my head yes, watching his expression change from relaxed to excited. I watched him pull those off and discard them as well, leaving only my thong on. “I hope this is okay” he smiled. He was still looking at me with those intense eyes, making it difficult for me to breathe properly.

He removed the last piece of clothing from me, both my spandex and the shorts he gave me, revealing my beautiful skin and perfectly plump curves underneath. He took a few seconds to appreciate every inch of my body before sliding his slim fingers between my legs. Instinctively my knees fell apart slightly, allowing him access to my core which caused his eyes to darken even more. As he gently traced circles around my bud, sending me into complete ecstasy, I moaned loudly, moaning in pleasure as my hips began grinding into his finger tips.

“God, you’re so pretty” he whispered, trailing kisses along my cheek. I bit my bottom lip to suppress the moans coming out of my mouth as he continued to stroke the wetness inside of my thighs. “So perfect.”

He spread my wetness all over his fingers and slid one finger inside of my desperate hole. At first, he started slowly, his thumb circling my clit while his middle finger slid in and out of my warm opening, slowly increasing the amount of pressure until I was gripping down onto his fingers with all of my strength. He increased the speed of his movements, adding another finger, pumping them hard into me. I closed my eyes and arched my back, trying my best to keep a good grip on his fingers.

“Shit, you’re so wet angel” he groans. He took his hand away to pull off his own shorts, with his boxers. His dick spring free, tip raging and dripping with precum. It was big, a lot bigger than I had expected.

I take all of his length into my fist as he continues contact with my folds. “Fuck, that feels good, baby” he says under his breath. I collect spit in my mouth and layer his tip and slide my hand up and down slowly.

I feel a familiar knot forming in my stomach as he keeps a consistent pace pumping his finger into my gushing pussy. “Agh yess” I moan on his cock, feeling the burning sensation building up. He leans down to place a tender kiss on the back of my shoulder, his warm breath fanning my sensitive skin, causing my back arch even higher. "Let go babygirl"he murmurs against my shoulder.

I let my hand rest against his erection, stroking him slowly, feeling the tip get longer by the moment. Soon enough, I can no longer contain myself as I let the orgasm rip out of me. His name came spilling out of my mouth, followed by a loud moan “Fuck Sunghoon, just like that.” I continue to hold on to him as the wave of pleasure takes over me, feeling my muscles start to seize up and my vision starting to blur.

As I'm regaining my composure, he pulls out of me, bringing his fingers up to his mouth. “You taste so good, princess” he praises, with sweat droplets forming in his forehead.My face turns red with embarrassment. I cover my face with my palms as I try to control my breathing. Sunghoon chuckles and grabs my wrists, pulling my hands away from my blushing face and places them on his cheeks instead. “Don’t be embarrassed, babygirl. That was hot” he says. My blush gets stronger by the second.

“Let me get you cleaned up” he suggested, getting out of the bed to go to his bathroom where he kept his extra cloths. He came back with a small smile on his face. He runs the rag between my legs and said “I am really happy you decided to spend the night”

“Me too Sunghoon” my smile only visible by the moonlight. He went back into the bathroom to put the cloth into the dirty clothes hamper.

“Now come here…” He brings his lips to meet mine once more. He wraps his arms around my sore body, making my face bury into his chest. Our bare skin resting against eachother was so relaxing. His skin was soft, and he was perfectly toned to my liking. He runs his fingers through my hair and begins to massage my scalp, making my whole body tremble. “It’s really late, sweetheart, let’s get some rest” he whispers and kisses my forehead, then rests his chin on the top of my head. As I lay there in Sunghoons embrace, feeling the warmth radiating off him, my eyes gradually fall shut.

-

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[lovedrruunk]

Arcane women and their very specific toxic traits/red flags

this hurt my soul to make but THE TRUTH MUST BE SPOKEN!!!

Caitlyn, constantly feels the need to correct you. Whether it be your grammar, spelling, literally just anything you get wrong, you best believe she’s right there correcting you like the KNOW IT ALL she is. She also has the tiniest savior complex but if you point it out she'll deny it and get defensive. If you don’t meet her high standards or expectations (that r UNSPOKEN), she’ll try to “help” you improve but it just feels more like constant nitpicking than support.

Sevika, don’t even try to ask this woman something. 100% believes in stupid questions. If you ask her something she deems as dumb she will actually get so pissed off even if you’re completely serious. She’ll give you this look of pure annoyance/disappointment that will honestly just make you shut yourself up. Loves to answer with “’Dunno.” WHEN SHE DAMN WELL BE KNOWING!!!! Has a whole “Figure it out yourself” attitude

Jinx, never gives you details about anything. Will just randomly leave the house without telling you where she's going because she thinks there's no reason for you to know. She doesn't do it to be secretive like she genuinely just doesn't understand why you need to know if it has 'nothing to do with you.' If you scold her about it she'll pretend to understand but still won't remember to tell you whenever she goes out. Also this isn’t JUST about her leaving the house it’s about literally everything like she just won’t tell u anything

Vi, has a really bad interrupting problem. You'll be telling her about something and if you say even one word that reminds her of something else she'll bring it up and change the entire conversation topic. She thinks she's being engaging but really it's just super annoying and makes you not even want to tell her about your day because you know she'll just end up talking about something else.

Mel, is lowkey highkey really manipulative... like she definitely knows how to use her charm to get you to do what she wants. She's like so good at it too like you won't notice what she was doing until you're already stuck doing what she's asked for. She's so like nice and sweet with the way she gives you attention right before asking you to get something done for her.

edit: I WROTE THIS LAST NIGHT WHEN I WAS SLEEP DEPRIVED AND FORGOT I POSTED IT LMAO I feel like these could’ve been better so maybe part 2 soon…

[ubeb0nes]

HCs of Sevika in Love ఌ

Congrats champ, you bagged a baddie!

**Reader is fem!

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It's not that Sevika has crazy high standards. Her wants in a partner are actually very straightforward; it's just that most people lack the base integrity and self-accountability to even catch her attention in the first place

I really don't think she'd ever fall for anyone from Piltover, there's just too many generations of trauma accompanied by a life lived under their foot for her to get past. She loves Zaun too much to ever love anything to do with Piltover

That said, she's attracted to the ideals she associates with the Undercity; perseverance, strength (doesn't have to mean physical), adaptability and loyalty. If you have her love, you most certainly earned it bae

For her, it's probably an "oh shit"/"oh no" type of singular moment, when she realizes she's fallen in love

Either you got hurt or in some position where her true feelings were forced out of her, OR it's during an achingly soft moment where it's clear how loyal/devoted you are to her, and only her.

Absolutely spends months denying herself. She will try to distance, reasoning that you're both better off without the notion of love walling you in.

Zaun is no place for that, she thinks. She recalls Felicia and her husband, dying together on that bridge while a twenty-something year-old Sevika, at the time, watched them fall.

The pain to know you couldn't save your loved one in your final moments (even worse to leave two young children behind). She couldn't imagine it. Didn't want to. Sevika knew that her road would end at a violent last stop, and she didn't want you anywhere near that. She thinks about having met you in a different place.

…But she can't fully hide how she feels about you, not ever. She may oftentimes be rough and ruthless, but even at her worst moment Sevika isn't a cold individual. She's too passionate about you, cares too deeply for where you are and how you are

So when you show up at her apartment to yell at her for being so cruel, for shutting you out of her heart instead of being a grown-ass woman and telling you what the fuck you did wrong, she lets you.

She lets you yell until you've tired yourself out, and then she pulls you into that embrace you missed so much. You hit her shoulder or her chest, weakly, because you love her like crazy and never wanna actually hurt her, and tell her to fuck off.

"I didn't wanna push you away, dumbass," she'll say to you, softly, as she presses a kiss to your ear, "You think I don't want you with me all the time? To tell you I love you and shit without it coming back to bite us in the ass? Of course I do. Of course I do. I just… I don't know how. But I'm gonna fuckin' learn, doll. I promise."

"You… you love me? Really?" "Doll, I don't even let Silco talk to me like that." "You asshole-!"

You're mad, but not really. How can you be? You two will make this work, she already gave you her word.

It's more likely for you to move in with her than vice versa. She lets you go ham on adding your personality to her living space, she doesn't have any strong preferences besides cleanliness

Always says I love you before she goes to work. Just in case. If you mess with her and don't say it back, she will get up in arms about it within two seconds of silence

"I could die, you know." "Babe, I'm just joking!" "Do you see me laughing??"

Obviously, lets her drama queen side show more. She's just all-around looser once she confesses.

She makes sure you know how different you are from others, how special you are. Even her posture is different the moment you're within arm's reach

Body language and physicality are Sevika's main fluency. When in love, you notice the way she angles her body protectively around yours in public, or how she always urges you to link your arm with hers when you walk.

You notice that she almost looks… smaller at home. You realize this is on purpose. She makes herself less intimidating when it's just you, lowering herself to your level and opening her posture to you

At home, she likes kneeling by your side when you're sitting on the couch, checking you over or pressing slow kisses to your hands.

Devoted, devoted, devoted. She never wants you to forget.

Every time you call her name, she always stops what she's doing to give you her attention.

"Sevi?" "Yes, baby?" Every time. It's grounding for you both, in a way

Her henchmen become your henchmen. They know better than to say no to your requests for their help. (Ran is down for antics with you regardless!!)

People all over the Undercity start to recognize you as "Sevika's woman". Not her "girl", you garner too much respect for that

You are the only person Sevika answers to besides Silco. Her close circle teases her that you turn her into a little lovestruck puppy

It's really only them who are even capable of teasing her about this, because her changes in behavior are so minute but so important

She puts out her cigarillos when you sit down with her. She always shifts you over to her left side (the side most capable of protecting you). Her eyes start scanning the room more frequently than before you'd arrived.

She figures out over time that she was wrong. When she holds you against her while you sleep, and you grab her hand half-consciously to press kisses to her wrist, she knows you don't make her weak

When you whisper that you love her against her neck while you sway in the kitchen, moving to whatever music vibrates from the depths of her beloved city, she knows you don't make her weak

When you pull her back together without fail, remind her that she is more than just a grunt in a revolution, a soldier that can be replaced, she knows you don't make her weak

There isn't anything she wouldn't do to get back to you. She has to live long enough to know what a good life in a liberated Zaun looks like with you