#needs new meds

[sergle]

taking a moment to reflect on the fact that the bitches on tumblr have - informed me how to get paxlovid for free (bc I complained it costed $1600) - told me that my Kia car troubles were directly relevant to a lawsuit and that I could get kia to pay for the repair - told me how to get an emergency refill of an existing prescription that has run out of refills all because I complain so much on this website and the gay people in my phone genuinely have solutions to my problems that I wouldn't have known about

[pallanophblargh]

I have a disproportionately loud mess of a head for no discernible reason* so it’s kind of a miracle that I spent the last month and some change willing myself to wield watercolor again. Witness the struggle! A long overdue color sketch for a (super patient) client.

Just watercolor with a boop of gouache.

*they are a mush of small but immense problems??? Executive dysfunction being maximized by meds the main culprit…

[crybaby-bkg]

“I’m terrified of trying those hitachi wands,” you offhandedly mention one night in a quiet laugh, while laying in bed beside Bakugou. you’re both on your phones, one last scroll before bed, even though he’s actually playing one of those old people games. he looks over, hair pushed back by a clip he stole from you.

“Why would you be scared?” he asks you, completes the last two moves of the game before he closes his phone and sets it on the table beside the bed. he turns all of his attention on you then, rolling over to his side to face you, and you do the same.

“Because those things are damn near weapons with how they render people useless for like, twenty minutes after they cum.” you snicker, thinking back on the video you had seen earlier in the day. the lady damn near ruined her phone with the wetness, and could hardly move for a good minute after.

Bakugou only stares at you, doesn’t say anything for a long while, but he has this look on his face. he’s thinking about something, but doesn’t open his mouth until he’s whispering,

“That’s crazy,” he kisses your forehead and mumbles an I love you before he rolls over and pulls the covers to his head. you only blink in confusion before you chalk it up to him being the shy little prude he’s always been, and lay down yourself.

the conversation goes forgotten as the weeks pass on, something you don’t dwell on much afterwards. but obviously, it hasn’t passed Bakugou’s mind at all.

“I got it in pink.” he tells you one night after he’s wined and dined you. that wasn’t anything out of the ordinary for him, but what was weird was how jittery he had been the entire time. this was why, surely, when he leads you to the bedroom and opens a neat little box with one of those wands you had completely forgotten about sitting prettily in front of you.

“Katsuki!” you laugh, hands covering your mouth before they cover your eyes in a mix of shame and shyness. “Why do you wanna see me laid out and twitching after using that thing?” you softly punch his shoulder, looking between his reddened cheeks and the wand he holds in front of you like an engagement ring.

“It’ll be hot.” he shrugs, mouth twisting this way and that in uncertainty, before he looks at you from under his lashes. “Wanna try it out?”

“Of course I do.” you answer back just as quickly, stripping from your clothes even quicker. it makes Bakugou laugh, taking his shirt off and his pants too, just to be safe in case you become a slash zone.

he tries it first with him sitting between your legs, just holding the wand there. he looks between your legs and then to your eyes, starting on a low setting and watches how you twist and thrive in the silken sheets. and when you cum, he thinks he can push you a little further.

he ups the vibrations, adds two of his fingers inside of you, crooking them until he finds that soft spot inside of you that makes you absolutely sob. you squirt all over him and he wonders if he should take his boxers off too (he doesn’t though; the thought of finding them tomorrow stained in you makes him damn near burst in his pants).

the next position is in front of your mirror on the closet, with your legs spread over his. Bakugou hooks his chin over your shoulder, holds your twitching thighs open as he keeps turning the vibrations up to the highest settings. you’re squirming and whining and whimpering for mercy, even though you cry even more whenever he stops.

the next time and the next time and the next, he’s got more fingers inside of you, his cock, another one of your favorite toys. he sets you in doggy style, even though he doesn’t fuck you, but keeps the wand between your legs. he likes the way your entire body shakes beneath him, collapsing, trapped between his weight and the strong vibrations that send you into another dimension.

the next day, you can barely feel between your legs, shaky and unstable for the whole day. but Bakugou makes up for it; he always does.

[pastadoughie]

i am extremely sane & normal & i say this w/ complete sincerity as something i believe- its just that "normal people" (ppl w/o "severe" mental illness or trauma) are deeply cruel & bigoted because of their squemishness & disgust twards people who have anything less then perfect social presentation & lifestyle.

i know logistically i am someone who is "severely mentally ill", atleast, when i talk to psychs, they go wide eyed when i say certain things, dont trust me, ask me unprompted if ive had certain diagnoses or evaluations, i guess i meet *their* criteria. i have had little to no irl human contact in the past 6 years, & am deeply afraid of outside things, like supermarkets & trees & the sun. but like. its not like i fucking explode if you take me outside. ive done alot of tharapy & can atleast somewhat speak to people & maintain a level of composure. its just that i obviously try to avoid going outside because it feels agonizing & scary. but like. thats a logical fear??? i dont. have delusions or anything like that. i have reasons to be afraid of things. understandable logical things that could happen in real life. why are people so weird about it? is everybody really so sheltered? you have so little creativity you cant imagine why someone is upset by these things? do you just not care about your own safety?

of course under my circumstances im going to act a bit strange sometimes but you would too! its not something irrational & its not a mental illness!!!! i have simply had to go through more shit then you!! if you get into a car accident & then develop a fear of cars then that is a reasonable fear! because it could (and HAS) happened & it could hurt you!! & its not even something i can argue about because the mere fact that its an accusation against me discredits me before i even get to speak! its unfair!! you cant just accuse every tranny you meet of being a delusional freak because you dont wanna talk to them !

[werecreature-addicted]

Do I think I’m brave enough to court and eventually make love with a monster beyond human comparison? Yes of course. Am I on the verge of tears in the doctors office because I’m so anxious? Also yes get me out of here

[thiinka]

[chrliekclly]

thinking abt this again actually lmfao

[sanguine-melancholia]

thank u my gallant knight

[fallenclan]

yes, Cedarberry's original name was Flailnut. I would have left it except i just. could not take it seriously. good for a laugh tho

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[achillesthesimp]

I’d sleep so much better at night if I was taking my meds snuggled with boy

[tj-crochets]

I cannot find the post anymore because my notes are a mess, but shoutout to the person who told me to look up a pattern for bloomers as an answer to my very vague post about maybe wanting to make shorts, you were absolutely right!!

I found an easy tutorial, all I have left to add are the bottom hems and elastic, and I did not have enough of any one pattern of flannel so instead I have half and half plaid flannel bloomers. They are going to be my winter pajama pants and I am delighted making them, they will be absolutely ridiculous

[milkweedman]

It is interesting how much math comes into even the most basic of like. Making things. Making almost anything. And often not numbers necessarily but proportions and geometry. I think all the time about how castles were built with geometry at the heart of it. And I use the same kind of proportional math to make socks fit. And none of my pieces are ever knit with a prime number of stitches--because you use factors to make neat colorwork and ribbing and different stitches. Idk ! I remember constantly thinking 'how the hell is THIS gonna come in useful ?' But it always does. Math is at the heart of everything, and knowing how to apply it is a tool of critical importance to Thinking Up A Shape And Making It.

[pallanophblargh]

So it’s been a while. And I feel obligated to explain my lengthy absence from… everywhere. My email is so full I’m low key terrified.

On New Year’s Eve, I found out the hard way I have asthma. I thought I was tackling a stubborn cold with a particularly nasty cough, but it culminated in a trip to the ER after I all but stopped breathing and felt hypoxic. My oxygen saturation had dropped into the 60s and I was put on oxygen. Went through the whole barrage of tests, chest x rays and blood draws. And the culprit? RSV and the asthma I had thought was imaginary. Despite my own body’s efforts to cancel my subscription to the bullshit year we are now living in, I was discharged after 6 hours just an hour before midnight. To put it simply, I felt like total shit but no longer in danger.

RSV knocked me and J absolutely flat for 2+ weeks. I still am dealing with fatigue and respiratory/cardio hiccups as I try to get back to how life was before. And before I could get to that point, life threw another wrench.

Raclette, my darling pup I had adopted back in October, who I was assured had been spayed (having come from the shelter where it is required) had gone into heat. Which leads me to believe that her first owners had (for whatever crazy reason) lied to the shelter about spaying her, and there were no records of her from before her time at the shelter. To say I was disappointed and alarmed is an understatement, and my suspicions were confirmed by our vet. Poor girl has been in a diaper for a week and a half and her spay is 3 weeks away. We are both miserable and I’ve had my hands full taking care of her. She’s restless at night so I’m not sleeping well, but I would never hold it against her.

So yeah! Art took a severe back seat, and I will need to reevaluate my relationship with art once the commission queue has been emptied. It’s gonna be an extremely rough year and I’m looking to find things that bring me more joy while taking better care of myself (and the dog). It’s a tall order but it needs doing!

Stay safe out there, y’all.

[crybaby-bkg]

serial killer gojo who likes to stalk you on campus. watch you from across the cafeteria. follows you to your male friends dorm, who ends up maimed the next morning.

who gets tired of never being seen, even though he’s brighter than a fucking dying star on campus, and yet you never notice him. who gets tired when the campus is empty and you’re all alone. finds a knife that’s almost bigger than your head and chases you across the open fields.

he’s laughing, the whole time. his head thrown back and his smile wide as the blade hangs limply at his sides, as if not in threat. as if your heart doesn’t beat so hard against your ribcage, that you think you hear the bones crack with every thud. like your bleeding heart may burst from your skin and splatter onto the ground before you.

he’s a killer, but he’s kind. he’s a killer, but not to you, never to you. holds you so sweetly when he catches you, because of course; he was always going to catch you. licks away your tears and smiles at you, disarming, everything and not. his eyes too ocean wide, his teeth too bone white. you see your reflection in his incisors. you see prey. you see your reflection in his eyes. you see love. it’s always been love for him.

all you have to do now is accept it.

[myhappilyneverafter]

I need to invest in a new mirror for my bedroom. A pretty vintage one. FUCK

[malvo-ish]

Everyone can invest their won money in damn therapy again. Except #8. Homegirl can walk straight into the mental hospital. She is far from saving. 💀