#need more rewatches and will have SO many more thoughts
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Tea Is A Love Language ~ A.H x Reader
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A/N (wow I haven’t wrote that in years): Hi! I’m back (says them to people who did not even realise they stopped writing lmao). There’s been an Aaron Hotchner x You slow burn fic brainstorming away whenever I’ve been rewatching Criminal Minds for the past few years so I thought I’d make a comeback to write a sample entry (that takes place a bit into the actual fic) to see what everyone thinks, aha.
CW/Context: Aaron and Hayley are divorcing/there’s no Emily(sorry!)/Aaron being grumpy but then surprisingly sweet/Reid and reader are best friends/Morgan and reader are very close due a traumatic past/Aaron gave a private lil sweet pep talk to reader when they got overwhelmed after the college campus murders/the timeline is a bit jumbled but it’ll be easier to follow/explained in full fic/in canon mentions of violence/I’m rusty at this, forgive me
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A sigh. Then a smacking sound as the paper contents of a file hit the desk.
“Who’s up for a drink?” Morgan stood up. Eyebrows raising as if a lightbulb flashed atop his head, he turned. “Actually.. who’s up for five?”
The man didn’t need to ask you twice. Nights out drinking with Morgan were always the safest. Sure, they were wild and chaotic.. but you always knew you would get home and you always knew you’d never wake up the next morning fearing you did something you regret. It was funny. One of the men who inspired you to join the Academy and pursue this as a career was not only now a colleague but a friend. A close friend at that. Your letters containing updates on your life since that awful period of your life when you were 18 were more for Gideon’s sake. Though that didn’t mean Derek never checked up on you throughout the years that led to you surprising the agent the day it was announced a new member was joining the team and in you walked into the table meeting.
“I don’t know..” your best friend trailed off, his focus on fixing the contents of his brown satchel.
You got up from your desk, the one attached to Spencer’s, shouldering your own bag. “Nuh-uh, Spence. You’re coming.” You looked up at him, trying your hardest to use your eyes to silently beg to coax him out.
It worked. It always worked. Reid hated nights out, especially Morgan’s definition of a night out, but you knew you made it tolerable for him. Many a night of drinking you sat with the doctor, letting him ramble off about statistics or Star Trek and often debating the one topic you yourself did know about - Doctor Who. You didn’t know why some of the others treated listening to his interests and rambles as almost a chore. You had always found them interesting and besides, how could someone not take an interest in what their best friend cared about?
“.. you’re still cosplaying at comic con with me, right?” Spencer’s eyes narrowed at you.
“Of course.”
“Alright, I’m in.”
You mouthed a “thank you” at him, your hand coming up to touch his elbow as a comfort as you both walked to join Morgan and Rossi heading towards the door.
“JJ?”
“Ugh, I’d love to but.. gonna have to take a rain check.” the blonde woman grimaced, picking up her share of files.
You felt someone brush past you as they hurried towards the glass door of the bullpen. You turned your head, realisation hitting you that it was your Unit Chief. You hadn’t properly spoken one on one to the man ever since the day the team was about to leave Flagstaff, Arizona. There had been a spree killer on a college campus, murdering women who were very similar in age to you and it brought back some painful memories. Painful memories as well as a feeling of guilt that you had survived your own attack and had went on to go and finish college. A privilege that those victims never got to make a reality. You had stepped away for a moment to compose yourself back at the hotel while the other agents were packing to go home when Hotch had appeared beside you. You had been sure you were to be scolded for being too soft or for your exterior slipping, a worry that was all too evident as you had tried to quickly wipe your tear away and swallow the ache in the back of your throat. But no. He had been kind. Really kind. The conversation had not been long, nor did the comforting hand on your arm to gesture you back to the hotel to leave linger, but it had helped.
“Hotch, you up for a beer?” the Italian man extended the invitation to his friend.
Hotch stopped in his tracks, his eyes flickering to the side as he pondered his answer. He decided with a sigh. “Sure.” He turned and you offered an awkward smile when his eyes settled on you.
“Agent Hotchner.” came the suited man with a clipboard and envelope into the room through the glass doors.
Breathing in, Hotch’s eyes looked away from you as he turned. “Yes?”
The man presented him with the clipboard and a pen to sign for the brown envelope.
Hotch’s eyes shifted down to it and his body stiffened slightly with a sharp intake of breath.
You had never seen Hotch display a crack in his exterior like that before. I wonder what’s in that envelope. You thought.
Breaking the silence, you sucked your lower lip in - a tell, you had been told by one of your profiler buddies, that you felt awkward and anxious. “What is it?”
Your boss stared down at the envelope, his fingers subconsciously kneading the paper. That’s one of *his* tells, you surmised, whatever it is it’s bothering him.
He finally glanced up at you through dark eyelashes, a look of defeat in those dark eyes. “Hayley’s filing for divorce. I’ve been served.”
Fuck. Fuck. You fucked up.
You watched as Hotchner took a final look at the contents in his hands before walking away, no longer feeling up to a fun and happy night.
~
“McCoy Boy! How was Connecticut?” You greeted Spencer as you, Morgan, JJ and Rossi piled back into the bullpen. You dropped your bag onto your chair and circled round to the opposite side of the desk to throw your arms loosely round the genius’ neck and shoulders. You never took advantage of the privilege of being the only one Reid allowed to casually touch him like this but now didn’t count. You had missed him. While you were in Indianapolis helping Rossi catch the monster that haunted him and three siblings, your best friend and your Unit Chief were in Connecticut interviewing a death row inmate.
Spencer rested his hand on one of your arms as you squeezed him, propping his book down on his desk. “Ultimately uneventful.”
You shifted your head from the top of Reid’s curly mop to his temple. “Fill me in anyway.”
Spence chuckled before turning his gaze at Rossi. “Uh sir, there’s someone waiting to speak to you in your office.”
You pulled back to crane your neck behind you. Sure enough, Kevin Lynch stood in the doorway to the office at the end of the walkway.
You focused on JJ’s face as Kevin talked, a face barely containing her smile and giddiness. Your eyebrows furrowed confused and as Rossi walked past to talk ‘man-to-man’ with the tech analyst, you mouthed ‘what??’ to the blonde.
JJ raised her eyebrows suggestively at you as she swivelled to walk away. “Garcia and Kevin sittin’ in a tree..”
Morgan’s mouth dropped open. “Get out of here.”
“Wait, what? What?” the brown eyed genius piped up, confusion and anxiety about missing a clue seeping in his voice.
“Didn’t you hear the song, love?” You asked your friend, your left arm still leaning on the back of his office chair for standing support.
“The song meant something? No, I missed it!” Reid grew frantic. Adorable.
“Yeah, it..” you trailed off as your eyes looked around the room as you looked up. They landed on the dark haired man in his pristine suit, shoulders tense as he hunched over his desk, one hand resting on his forehead.
He looks so stressed.
You sucked in your lower lip. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it.” You ruffled the top layer of Spencer’s brown curls. “I’ll explain it later.”
You moved your duffel bag onto the floor underneath your desk and settled in your chair. Every instinct in you was screaming to check in on your boss. That’s just the type of person you were and your instincts never did you wrong. You had gone on gut instinct when you asked Spencer what was causing him to struggle which eventually led to him going to rehab. You had listened to your instinct when it told you to gather up Morgan and JJ to join Rossi in Indianapolis a few days ago. But this was Hotch. This was your boss. You had never seen the man crack a smile let alone open up about his feelings.
Leaning your chin on your hand, your head twisted to look at the environment behind your desk. Looking behind you had become a habit since you were a teenager, even when your body knew it was in a safe environment such as the bullpen. But old habits die hard and listen, it was a habit that kept you alive in the field. Funny that. You’d think someone with that self preservation habit would run away from situations that posed a threat, not run to them. And certainly not make a career out of solving them.
Your eyes landed on the coffee machine set up and kettle sat on the communal kitchen countertop.
Hmm. Too late for coffee. You hummed. Hold on..
You swung your legs out from under your desk, pushing yourself up and away from your desk and headed towards the communal kitchen. The plethora of jars containing coffee grounds - the jar with the brown and gold label was Reid’s only go to - and sugar - the plastic tub of aspartame was JJ’s - littered the counter. But you weren’t looking for the coffee. Stretching up on your tiptoes, you opened up each cupboard. You searched the top two before bending down to view the contents of the bottom ones.
A-ha! Found you. You took out the green box praying it wasn’t empty and silently thanked God when it wasn’t. Plopping one of the tea bags into the clean ecru mug you found, you filled the kettle in the sink and flicked on the switch.
As the water boiled, you dared to glance to your right at Hotch’s office. You didn’t think it was possible but the man looked even more stressed. The noise of the kettle turning off drew your attention and you poured the hot liquid into the mug, pressing the teabag to the sides of the mug with the spoon before scooping it up and binning it in the pedal bin. Stealing the last of the semi skimmed milk from the fridge, you trickled some of it into the tea before stirring. Dropping the spoon into the sink promising to clean it in a few minutes, you grasped the handle of the cup and headed towards the steps to the walkway.
Your feet reached the closed door to the office and your knuckles rapped against the wood.
“Come in.” He sounds tired.
Careful not to spill the tea, you pushed the handle of the door down and the door opened. Hotch glanced up. Twice. Once out of habit. The other a double take. His head left his hand and he placed his pen down on the case files in front of him. You could tell he was trying to figure out what you were doing in his office, it was obvious in his eyes. For a man so expressionless, his eyes were always so expressive.
You realised you had been staring at him for probably a bit too long and shifted your eyes down to the mug in your right hand, your other hand clasping round it for the excuse of holding something as a distraction. You lightly tapped your ring against the porcelain as you tried to word your sentence in your head before your mouth could get you into trouble. The action had Hotch’s gaze look down at your hands, something you noticed he did often. You had a habit of fiddling with one of your rings when you wanted to say something but were deciding if you should or not. It usually ended in Hotch noticing and asking you your opinion on the topic at hand.
You took a breath in. “Sir, if I had known.. I wouldn’t have asked about the envelope in front of everyone.“
“Y/L/N-“ Hotch sat upright in his chair.
“Anyway, I uh, I’m not going to ask you to talk about it.” You reassured him, cutting him off. Still looking at the mug in your hands, you continued. “I just want you to know that you’re not alone in this. I, the team, will support you in any way we can.”
You could feel your heart speeding in your chest, you were sure your boss could even hear the thumping. You risked looking up. The usually stoic man’s gaze softened, his forehead smoothing out. Maybe Hotch wasn’t so scary all the time.
“My mother always liked to show it with tea,” You remembered the mug in your hands. Probably should explain that, yeah. “And it’s what I know so.. uhm..” You shuffled forward closer to his desk and settled the cup on top of the dark wood. Stepping back, your hands went to the back of your trouser legs.
Hotch stared at you, his expression not giving anything away. “You didn’t have to.”
You cocked your head to the side. “Think of it as repaying the favour.”
You watched as those big dark eyes softened, gaze switching to the mug now sat on his desk. Giving an tight lipped smile, you nodded awkwardly and turned to leave. You didn’t wanna overstay your welcome. As your hand reached for the door, your name being called stopped you in your tracks. Not your last name. Your name.
“Y/N?”
You turned, surprised at the switch from your surname to your first name. Hotch called everyone by their surnames, even Rossi sometimes. “Yeah?”
“Thank you.” He meant that. Sincerely.
You tried to stop the smile etching its way onto your face. You felt bold. “Don’t mention it.. Aaron.”
Hotch - Aaron cracked a small smile. A tiny quirk of his lips. You nodded at each other, your hand closing the door behind you as you left the office.
Taking the steps down to your desk, you didn’t see Hotch bring the mug to his lips, taking a swig. His eyebrows raised in approval. Another swig. Leaning back in his chair, he inhaled, looking to his left to watch the bullpen out of his office window. He spotted you carrying case files back to your desk, engrossed in conversation with Reid.
He sighed, his attention turning back to his desk, pausing before opening the drawer next to him. His fingers hovered over a brown envelope, picking it up and sliding the contents of it out in front of him. Taking a breath and another swig of tea, Hotch picked back up his pen and signed his name on the dotted line.
#criminal minds#aaron hotchner#x you#criminal minds x you#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x you#dr spencer reid#spencer reid#x reader#one shot#oneshot#slow burn#angst#fluff#criminal minds one shot#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds x reader#hotch x you#aaron hotchner one shot#aaron hotchner oneshot
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Cause I don't wanna be in love with another, even in another life
AN: I'm having ateez and stray kids brainrot rn. Rewatching all of skz code and wanteez... LORDDDD IM LEGIT SOBBING I LOVE THEM ALL <33333
Mentions of soft San, fluff with a sligth slice of angst and implied nsfw. Mostly teeth rotting fluff, self indulgent (sorry not sorry)
Sannie who is the kindest guy you've ever met. Many think he's tough and mean, but once you get to know him a bit more, he's actually just a ball of sunshine. He's warm, comforting, gentle, nurturing and healing. Somehow he always has something to say no matter your problem. He has the most gentle touches. Jokes and laughter is also a big part of your time together. He enjoys having his hair played with while he reads. Head in your lap while you do random stuff.
Sannie who loves poetry and loves writing for you. Even if he doesn't have the courage to show it to you. I feel like he's the type of boyfriend to leave you notes around the house with words he can't say in person. The type of boyfriend to crush on his partner, who goes above and beyond to make you feel better if life is shitty atm. He enjoys being your safe haven and feels safe being with you. The boyfriend who can't handle alcohol so whenever you two are out, at an event or dinner with his group, he ends up taking care of you. If he is drinking I have a feeling he's gonna end up in your lap, clinging onto you for dear life. (I feel like he cries alot when he's drunk? THAT ONE TIME HE GOT SCARED BY THE MEMBERS IN THAT WANTEEZ EP. AND CRIED. I LITERALLY SOBBED, MY SANNIE)
Sannie who needs a stong bond to the people he surrounds himself with. I feel like he's attracted to individuals who are older than him. Preferably if you enjoy working out, being outside or is a bit of a nerd. Love has no boundraries for him though. He likes feeling like he's stronger than you, just because he likes being protective. Even though you both know who's gonna be ordering for you two. He is the type of guy to act intimidating if someone approaches you when you're on a date. Then afterwards he's gonna be like "Woah, did I look intimidating just now?", "Woah, Hyung/Noona didn't I look totally badass?" (SOBBING I NEED A BF LIKE HIM, SORRY THIS IS SO SELF INDULGENT)
Sannie who loves being praised for small things. He thives of being helpful for you. ESPECIALLY IF HE IS TALLER THAN YOU. He enjoys watching you while doing the most mundane things. He enjoys the smell that your parfume leaves in the bathroom, or the fog on the mirror. He enjoys seing your favorite colour next to his favorite colour when he's out shopping. Sends you pictures of it with "This is us" attatched to it. I don't feel like gift giving is is biggest love language. BUT i do think he's the type of guy to give you a pretty rock because he thought about you when he saw it.
Sannie who gets stressed and insecure easily. Reassurance is important in your relationship. As well as gentle reminders that you think he is the awesomest. Joking around with him when he's stressed is something that makes him let go of the tension in his shoulders. He loves just sinking into your warm touches at the end of the day. When he's touring or busy, he forces wooyoung to cuddle him while he wants to cry because you're not there. If you're an idol aswell, i believe San would cheer you on alot. He'd be so proud whenever he saw you absolutely devour the stage. You two might also write lyrics/poetry together.
Sannie who can be rough when it comes to being intimate. But when he's stressed, exhausted, sad or insecure, he definatly enjoys you being soft, praising him and a tiny bit of body worship. He likes having his hair played with and i have a feeling that his some of his sweet spots are his arms, neck and thighs/calfs?? I don't know. He likes recieving but also giving. Definatly soft dom leaning though.
Songs I listened to DIMPLE - BTS, HURT - NEW JEANS, HEAVY - THE MARIAS, VAMPIRE EMPIRE - BIG THIEF, HEAVENLY - C.A.S
#ateez#choi san#ateez x reader#san x reader#ateez fic#san x you#sannie#san ateez#hubby material#san#I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE#I LOVE SAN#MY SANNIE<3333#atz imagines#atz x reader#atz#ateez imagines#ateez atiny#san atz
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I like Crowley's grey bad-boi-deep-inside-good persona as much as the next person but let's not pretend he's above hypocrisy.
Miss ma'am criticizes the overkill of making angels fall for asking questions, but (apparently) obliterates his plants at the first sign of disobedience/failure/disappointment.
(then again the shredding happens off screen so who knows?)
#is that a deep commentary on the cycle of trauma#are we witnessing generational trauma here#idk man#ask mr gaiman#he's moving in his mysterious ways#is Crowley doomed to be a son of his parent?#whatever or whoever the creator/parent is in this scenario#need more rewatches and will have SO many more thoughts#but yeah#Crowley may be a darker grey than we'd like him to be#and not in a 'claiming his new identity' kinda way#Crowley#good omens#david tennant#neil gaiman
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i can't stop thinking about how the relationship between Jones Hall and Conrad Earp is the heart of Asteroid City, how their one and only encounter (that we see) influences the entire film: Conrad writing a play about connection between people and the immediate connection between Jones and Conrad the moment they meet; the character of Augie becoming Jones, and Jones having his heart broken with each performance, a prelude to Jones' heart getting broken after Conrad's death; Jones initially knowing why Augie burns his hand but then doubting his interpretation and looking for an answer and meaning for the play and looking for the validation of the play director, just like he found Conrad's validation after his monologue when they first met; Conrad's play being also about death and grief, a grief that Jones has to perform without fully understanding it until that grief becomes real with Conrad's death, and so Augie and Jones truly become one man grieving the loss of his loved one; the scene with the actress playing the dead wife and the dream that would parallel both Augie and Jones, how they both feel lost and unable to move on, but the wife (and Conrad through the writing of the wife) urges them to move on and find love again; Conrad dying (what if Conrad was always meant to die? what if Conrad was doomed by his own narrative?) and in his death, giving Jones the grief he needs to play Augie and ultimately understand the play.
“use your grief.”
#does any of this make sense?#i have so many thoughts and they're still too raw to put into comprehensive words#asteroid city#jones hall#conrad earp#augie steenbeck#asteroid city spoilers#i need to write a proper character analysis about them#i've seen the film twice in theaters but i feel i need to rewatch it a hundred more times to fully grasp all the themes and meanings#mythoughts
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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Something I've been thinking a lot about lately is how everyone thought Egon had gone insane. What Happened that made them think that. They've fought a gigantic Stay Puft Marshmellow Man TWICE (counting the 2009 video game because iirc it's canon? Correct me if I'm wrong), fought an interdimensional god, fought a blood thirsty ruler that killed thousands and was hated by all that was trapped in a painting (and managed to get in to beat him by making THE STATUE OF LIBERTY start walking down the street with slime that reacted purely based on vibes), found an underground abandoned transit system full of the moodslime, had a bathtub try to eat Dana and her baby, fought a giant murderous black widow lady, fought the fisherman ghost who turned an entire hotel floor into the bottom of a ocean, and that's not even mentioning them getting trapped on an island that randomly raised up from underwater that had been abandoned for decades created by Ivor Shandor who worshipped Gozer. So what did he do or say that made everyone else think he'd gone insane?? All I can think is maybe he was acting strange / eratic before, but he's always been like that to some degree.
I don't know. It's something that I've been thinking about. The correct answer is 'it's not that deep and they needed a reason that the others weren't together anymore and weren't aware of Egons death or know what was going on,' but also. What Was He Saying that prompted everyone, including Ray, to think he lost his mind when he'd been right almost every time before that.
I'm genuinely so curious as to what he was up to before this. What was he doing. What insane idea was working on prior to this or was he even working on anything at all??
Also want to clarify this post isn't negative 😭 I really love the newer movies and their lore / the newer storyline / characters, I just like thinking about small stupid things like this. Gives me something to think about / speculate about / figure out an answer to.
#ghostbusters#egon spengler#nikolas posts#I have so many thoughts on it because I've just been rewatching the two movies on loop for the past few days.#All we got was Ray saying that he'd started talking about the end of the world (IIRC) and that he went insane and took everything#when he eventually left to deal with it on his own#which for the record it's extremely impressive that he would've stopped Gozer from returning BY HIMSELF. The only reason it hadn't worked#was because of the electricity issue#Hiding all the traps and setting up the proton packs to fire at the hell pit?? Insanity. He's just on a complete different level of existin#Like they were aware of Ivor Shandor and his plans long before??? They found his ISLAND DEDICATED TO GOZER who had full intention of#BRINGING THEM BACK#it's really Really REALLY not this deep but I have thoughts and I wanted to share them. Maybe someone else might have an idea I#couldn't think of or might have something to add.#I guess it could be a 'they beat Gozer once and assumed they were gone' but that wasn't the first time Gozer 'died' so??#if I missed something Please tell me. I haven't watched the newer movies as much as the older ones (I grew up watching them / playing#the game so I'm more familiar with the older lore and haven't had the chance to rewatch the newer ones 1000 times over unfortunately)#so it's entirely possible I missed something#I'd think maybe it was just because they were older but I really don't think thats the case. I have reasoning for it but I need to do#the math to make sure I'm getting the ages right by the time AfterLife happens.#really need to make a chart / timeline of all the events that happened and what year / month / day they happened. That's a project#for tomorrow perhaps.#anyways if anyones reading this sorry for the insane rambling and congrats for making it to the end#also this post isn't negative I adore the newer movies so much. I love them a lot and I genuinely don't really care about this at all#just a thing to think / ponder / speculate about if that makes sense#I enjoy thinking about stupid irrelevant stuff like this#so so so many thoughts
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God I’ll be more eloquent tomorrow i swear.
Or when finals are done anyway. So I can rewatch and make a few meta posts, mostly, because I really wanna have thoughts but my brain is to tired right now.
But I just wanna say how much I fucking loved dead boy detectives. Like that was such a genuinely good time. I was delighted—even through the sadder bits—it was just so fucking fun. That’s the main thing I keep getting hung up on, it was just such a joy to watch.
Highly recommend it, seriously, normally don’t binge but I just watched all of it with the best company so that always makes it even better.
I just really really really loved it and I know what I’m going to be recommending people nonstop for the next while so I can share that adoration lol.
#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#I love them so so so so much#I have so many thoughts about them right now and I wish I had more but#I will savor what I have right now lol#there will be so many thoughts in the morning#I’m gonna be so normal about this I swear#thedovespeaks#aaaaaaaaah god I need to rewatch this show#my coworkers are gonna get an earful tomorrow#okay nonsense is over#I sleep#I’m so fine guys
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wanted to do the hev suits like this started out to be but! well! gordo lineup
#art#half life#hlvrai#freeman's mind#gorgeous freeman#gordon freeman#gordon freemind#gordon feetman#hoping my writing isnt too bad LOL#kinda disjointed n not perfect but i wanted to solidify a few things#also the hla damage was bc of the advisors attack which is a litte further than i wanted this lineup to be#but how could i resistttttttt#i need to rewatch/play hl to figure out when best hed have a broken ankle. im thinking in hl1 but gman would. probably fix that?#but i it could work somewhere in hl2 orrrr ep1? sure. why not#morphine+the suit+Need To Survive you kinda learn to live w it#uh oh im rambling again. oh well#i wanted to give mind more damages like missing claws at LEAST but i need to think more#he def like . absolutely doesnt have hearing in that ear LMAO#scarring on hev suit from prime doesnt make much sense since its extra padded#but his model suggests otherwise??? idk i dont care. im giving him scars#im thinking mind n prime confide a lot together. i think theuy can be kinda friends maybe. listen... it could work#i have so so so so many thoughts you dont knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww
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If youre ok w sharing then i would love to hear your thoughts on lotor........ Hes such a weird guy. Dissecting him like a frog
If i get hate for this, i am blaming you/j but in all honesty i apologize if this kinda messy, as i have said it has beem awhile since i saw any of the episodes about him. Most of it is my personal interpretation and opinions of his character-
First of all i personally hate both "L0tor is evil rapist imperialist who did not have a single redeemable quality" and "L0tor is uwu poor baby who did nothing wrong", because yeah he had good intentions and he seemed to genuinely love Alura and care for Alteans but also he very much did do a lot of things Wrong. I am pretty sure a lot of his actions fall into category of Very Wrong
Lot0r to me is an absolute control freak, he has to be 10 steps ahead of everyone, he needs to be control of the situation no matter what. Whether it be through a silver tongue or by his blade (see N@rti's death, him vs White Lion). This is as much as a ruthless strategy as it is a trauma response. Being raised under Z@rkon, a father who only saw him as inferior half-bred, he had to learn survivor tactics. He will do anything to survive whether it be beg, lie, manipulate, and kill. He is a survivor of some genuinely godawful abuse he suffered for 10,000 years, combined with racism he suffered for being half altean
However this need to be in control extends to his allies and people he cares about. I am sure Lotor may have loved Alura, it doesnt change the fact that he very much abused her trust. Their entire relationship was based on a lie. He knew Alteans were still alive and not only did he not tell Alura about it he leaned into the "last survivors of Altea" for their relationship, which is why it was doomed since the beginning. And if it had not been this, then it would have been something else. Cause lying and manipulation are very much core of his character, that is how we are introduced to him
Like i see people going "Oh Lot0r could have been good if he had therapy and a hug", and i am not really not sure about it, cause like would he? Would he choose to be vulnerable and actually let his feelings out and be truthful in a an unbiased reliable way that will neither serve him in any way nor make him look better nor is a part of some machivilian scheme he cooked up because he doesnt trust the therapist he is paying? No
And thing is he does desire connection. He looks for connection in people who are similar to him. Half galran, altean survivors, Alura these are the people who he chose to get close to. He looks for similarities, people he can relate to, people who he sees as like him, people who he thinks can give him a sense of belonging. He is deeply lonely. However his desperation for control, absolute mistrust in anyone and everyone, and his inability to be actually honest dooms any relationship he'll ever have
Also this is probably just me, but for someone who is this morally complex character he has tendency to see things in black and white? Like it is His dad and empire= bad, alteans=good. He idolizes Altea to the point of seeing it as an Utopia, and this ideal was more important to him than any Alteans who are alive and with him. I also cant remember him ever caring about someone outside of the Dichotomy. Like at most i remember is after he became the emperor Lance pointing out how other planets need to be freed and he just brushed it off
Overall he gives me the "smart people dont always make good decisions, but they are good at justifying their bad ones" vibes. We dont know exactly why he decided to use alteans as batteries but i am choosing to go with my interpretation- "Lottor saw something fucked up in that future showing space whale thingy, decided the only way to solve was altean batteries except in true self fulfilling prophecy greek tragedy way it only made things worse and started a series of event that will cause the thing he saw causing real trouble a few years after his death.
Another thing! I think it should have been him being the focus of Evil Altean episode instead of A//ura. I hate that episode and everything it stands for but like if there Had to be an evil alteans episode then it should be around someone who is you know? Obsessed with Altean culture? Is big on control and manipulation? Is more geared towards big picture and "greater good" over individual? Is worried about turning into just like his galran father and so desperately wants to connect to his idealized version of his altean mother? Yeah
#empty answers#This is the type of shit that used to get you sniped from both sides of the shitty discourse back in ye old days#I probably have more thoughts but i also need to rewatch vld to have a clearer picture#Also i dont get when people say it was bad writing that he turned out traitor#Like it was handled in abhorent way but also- we are literally introduced to him manipulating an entire audience#The fuck yall mean yall thought he was genuine??#I used to like him but come on man#That was the most obvious disney twist villain if i have ever seen one#and vld writers are not smart enough to do something actually subversive#Also gonna be real with you while i do have a lot of thoughts of him i kinda also dont enjoy his character??#It is-how do i put it? A bit lame#Like the eps were going on about how he is this Most Complex Character and instead we have is-#a disney twist villain and sad anime backstory that is supposed to absolve him or something#I can think of so many villains/character that had similar aspects to him but were just Way Better#A convincingly manipulative man with black and white morality who thinks he is in the right even though his actions beg to differ?#B3los is right there#Villain who uses manipulation as a defense mechanism which only drive all their friends away? Grace monr0e and Sash Waybrigt#A tragedy who just wanted peace for his people only for things to spiral so horribly they destroyed the very people they sought to protect?#M0rdred pendrag0n hnoc my beloved <33#A hot villain who is morally reprehensible but is really hot? M3dusa G0rgon <3#And just. I think the problem is the writers wanted him to be all of those things and he ends up being none of them#Not to mention the plot armour. You mean to tell me he is being this obvious and yet no one suspected anything??#Yeah right. Detective!Hunk for the win!#Anyway sorry this is late and so rambly#Thanks for the ask!!!!#Anyone else reading this. This is just a personal opinion ok? No fights ok??
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JJ: It's something we call the buddy system. That means, you always go everywhere with a friend. MORGAN: That's right, because bad men and women are more likely to talk to us only when we're by ourselves
this is likely unintentional, but i like to read into things, so.
for context, they're speaking to a room full of children in a town with a serial child murderer, and are giving them some precautions to follow to stay safe (on a lighter note: the scene is intercut with a scene of gideon doing the same to a room of adults, which i really like)
jj addresses the children as "you" while morgan addresses them as "we". i dont like the term "freudian slip" because i hate freud, but thats the shortest way to describe what i think/headcanon is happening here. im sure they had a script, and i think morgan's part was "bad men and women are more likely to talk to you only when you're by yourself" and the "us/we" came out accidentally. or i could believe that morgan wrote his part of the script and wrote "we" because he sees himself in the victims.
obviously the way morgan was victimized during his childhood was very different to what's happening here (there is no sexual assault and we later learn that the violence was done by a peer, not an adult) but it's made clear several times that morgan takes any case where children are harmed very personally. they all do, because that's just how people are, but again, morgan specifically sees himself in the child victims they encounter. he was victimized differently, yes, but he knows what its like to face violence as a child, he knows the fear they felt, and, considering in this case they profile that the children know their attacker, he knows the feeling of betrayal
#of course its pretty universal that people who are alone are more likely to be victims of violence than people in groups#so that could be why morgan says “we”: he just means people in general#but i like this better even if its probably not how im supposed to be reading this LMAO#am i making any sense#sorry i have many thoughts and feelings about derek morgan he makes me need to lay down for several hours </3#derek morgan#not fic#criminal minds#criminal minds rewatch#criminal minds s02e06#the boogeyman#character analysis#tw sex assault#very random but if theres a list out there of the “most-used” trigger tags for each topic i would love to see it#i never know exactly what to tag for triggers#criminal minds 2x6
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#1440p is CRAZY#i love crying. anyways#i have thoughts...as im rewatching this.....#i like the delivery but you have to wonder about the line of god is punishing us....for what we've done#like mmm we need to unravel that more#and im sad forever bcus possibly they did but there were so many deleted scenes and we can't watch them#bcus unspooling that is like...well what does that mean tho lol#executions related to the oath of supremacy ? bcus henry never expresses regret for those#it is often a thread in fiction#it's in the tudors. that he orders more's execution but has mixed emotions about it and decides that anne is to blame#but when you look at the contemporary evidence that's really a stretch#yk. attending a play celebrating it. walking on foot MILES to see it.#he doesn't even seem to have anything you could circumstantially attribute to regret. no moves of generosity towards more's kin#like he does with the men he orders the deaths of in 1536...#like henry norris' heir hviii 'restored in blood'. which i always thought was. hmmm#obviously he eventually came to believe their marriage was cursed#so that could be the 'what we've done'#but like...idk...the vibe i got from the line was almost more like he was suggesting...for abandoning catherine?#and their treatment of her memory esp since in this series anne wears yellow and he doesn't#which is so...tiresome to me lol#ik ppl want it to be true#but there's nothing (contemporary; again) to suggest he regretted his treatment of catherine. ever#he never reversed his belief that he was never married to coa .#despite eventually coming to believe the same of his with AB
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ok but do i want to actually sit and read through all the clockie animation stuff so i have better foundation for what i want to say? i guess
#avil plays hsr#idk if i actually want to write this ramble because i started rewatching a bunch of scenes that i needed to figure my thoughts out#but the more i gather the more im getting lost with myself so im like MMMMM#i gotta line these pieces up first#i think the trickiest thing about gallagher is wondering how much of what he says is true vs false#UH#ill just tag this as#hsr 2.1 spoilers#because thats the ramble in the tags#but like as a follower of enigmata hes prone to lying and conjuring even more riddles to confuse you#so i just have to wonder too#and if his whole facade as gallagher is fake. then how did he actually become part of the bloodhound?#sunday points out how gallagher stoles features from so many members of the family so. i just have to wonder#he couldnt have changed his identity without being noticed#so thats where i get confused. like How did you get in here in the first place using your disguise?#how did you fool people?#ANSWER MY QUESTIONS MAN (SHAKES GALLAGHER)#at the very least though: i think what he says about mikhail is true#i want to believe those are true even despite his false front#the things i want to talk about is like#well first i wanna make a whole timeline of the historical events of penacony#and that will give me a better idea of how things led to one another to present time#and THANKFULLY i rewatched because now i understand what gallagher meant possibly by traitor#but how did the family come to be?#how did the dreammaster come to be? (SHAKES THE GAME)#ok so i have to read more. so this will take longer#unfortunately maybe by the time i get all the information i want itll be too late and someone else wouldve said#SOMEONE PROBABLY DID#but i like the satisfaction of pulling the pieces together myself. thats the satisfaction of solving cases and puzzles ✨#my desk looks ridiculous now because its like. sticky notes everywhere because im like I HAVE TO MAKE NOTE OF THIS
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ok so I rewatched Krester’s first appearance in the show for research purposes (I forgot what he sounded like) and here’s some notes about what I observed! (it’s a lot and also rambling lol) (let me put this under a cut it's a bit long)
Maura moves to help Krester, yes, but she’s standing up before the men even grab him. She senses the danger and immediately wants to help
Ángel moves forward when Krester is grabbed, I know we all know this but djasjhfvakkasllflfdhd!!!! (is it because he feels an innate need to protect him from harm? Does the body remember even if the mind forgets? What does Ángel think is happening?)
Ramiro and Ling Yi seem to have similar plights; they’re both scared for Krester and themselves. I think Ling Yi is more scared for herself (which makes complete sense, she’s in a bad and strange situation and i think the entire time something along the lines of 'what if this happens to me?' is going through her head and that's a scary thought), and Ramiro is probably more worried for Krester. Idk, his eyes just have more sad in them while he watches Krester being dragged away, while Ling Yi’s have more fear
interesting and also something I didn’t notice before: Lucien also moves, not when Krester is grabbed, but just as he’s being dragged away. I can’t tell whether he’s moving forward, shifting in his seat, or sitting back from moving forward, but I think it says something about his experiences or his character. Idk
another thing about Ramiro vs Ling Yi in this scene: even before Krester is grabbed, and then later as he’s being dragged away, Ramiro’s leaning forwards, towards Krester, while Ling Yi is leaning away to try and distance herself from the situation
Virginia (Mrs Wilson) is also uncharacteristically (at least I think so) disturbed at the scene. She's an intriguing character all around and doesn’t show a whole lot of emotion up until she almost jumps of the ship(???) and is pretty unsteady for the rest of season 1. I’d say the emotions on her face are fear, confusion, and maybe a little disgust? Idk, I'm not the best at reading emotions and also disgust might just be her normal face
also to support my Ramiro/Krester agenda: Ramiro is so worried for Krester in this scene? He cares so much for the people around him, even if he doesn’t know them at all. Truly a good man. But also: good ship material
also I want to talk about the costuming of the extras in this scene? Almost everyone is wearing something I also would like to wear. Kudos to the costuming department
also also just want to mention the mural thingy on the wall in the dining room? That’s… an interesting choice for somewhere where people are eating breakfast and chatting
also how smooth the transition is from Krester being dragged away to Ángel’s face as he watches it? cinema
#i have more thoughts. so so many thoughts#honestly i should do a rewatch and just dissect every scene#i already know there's so many hidden little things in this show and i want to find them#tagging every character mentioned in this post bc what if someone desperately needs content of their blorbo even if it's just their name?#anyway#krester 1899#krester#maura 1899#Ángel 1899#ramiro 1899#ling yi 1899#ling yi#lucien 1899#mrs wilson 1899#1899#1899 netflix
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boo *exu calamity au’s your bad kids*
#riz cerrit gorgug laerryn kristen zerxus fig loquatius adaine patia & fabian nydas btw. if anyone cares#(nightmare king era cass as asmodeus… obviously w/ fig instead but ayda evandrin… ANYWAYSSS)#i can’t remember her name but that One Bitch patia & laerryn hated is kipperlily copperkettle… patia as adaine for that let’s go haters!#need to do a rewatch honestly just to Remember shit also to maybe fully flesh this out#like i have a lot of thoughts here that i could expand upon rn but i’ve forgotten SO many parts of calamity atp bc i’m not into cr &-#have only watched it fully the one time & just generally rewatched certain parts idk how many times#me trying to explain how nydas’s perspective shift with the prophecy is sooo fabian but i can’t remember literally anything: so uh… because-#fantasy high#the bad kids#listen these tags might not be saying much of anything but when i say fig gorgug ayda loquatius laerryn evandrin TRUST ME ok… it’s sooo#same w/ zerxus asmodeus kristen nk!cassandra#also thing i think is funny: purvan or whoever is tracker & trackerbees are still exes and there’s just CRAZYYYY gay tension in every scene#wait i’m sorry even more stupid idea: yk how nydas has the hodmedods? fabian has those rats that show hole. there’s truly an army of them
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"I'll temper you into my greatest weapon" Ancients' king said to Sonic, as if Longclaw hasn't already done that
#I haven't talked enough abt this but yes i like to owe the sharpness of Sonic's skills to all the training he received from Longclaw#this fact combined w/ being built different (speedster) & having an unbreakable spirit is what makes him so fucking powerful#i have so many thoughts i cant put into words maybe i shld rewatch legend of gahoole to get ideas#longclawwwwwww#she really just created a beast & set it loose into the world#he's made of love & wilderness & violence#but also i think its funny how for the longest part sonic learnt abt owls more than he'd his own kind#or any other kind really#his world has been very smol for so long. before she left that is#hmm i need to go sleep#☆ . ( ˡᵒⁿᵍᶜˡᵃʷ ) in promises forgotten with time / to choices that weren't mine .
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always so embarrassing to call someone and realise the audio was coming out of ur speakers the whole time so u were prolly disturbing everyone in a 20m radius from ur room
#sorry to my neighbours and flatmate... it was just my dad tho lol so pretty regular conversation#so funny to me that we've independently formed the exact same opinions on so many movies#love that i can tell him i thought crash 1996 needed more eroticism n horror and hes like yeah it was too sanitised and dry#also hes v excited im watching more david lynch stuff every time i call hes like have u seen inland empire. when will u see inland empire#IM GETTING ROUUUND TO ITTT#hes a mulholland drive girlie too <3 he would do numbers on tumblr if he posted film opinions here#anyway.... back to the alien rewatch yippeeee#.diaries
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