#nate ramblings

[ambrosiadreamer]

.....what

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

I love the Leverage episodes where they're truly just psychologically tormenting a guy.

Like obviously they first establish that the guy is a terrible guy who does terrible guy things. And we really do need the terrible guy to be doing a lot of terrible guy things because this is kinda an ethical nightmare, but don't worry, they are reliably doing a lot of terrible guy things.

But then it is just like "hey, let's convince this guy that he's made first contact with aliens and also that aliens are trying to kill him" or "hey, let's make this guy believe he's contracted a deadly disease and is going to die in quarantine because medical staff are abandoning him" or "hey, let's first try to persuade this journalist that the government is secretly creating Guantanamo Bay 2: Underground Boogaloo in your backyards and when she doesn't run with that story, let's then make her think that oops the government accidentally leaked some kind of bioweapon into the waterways and now water is gonna kill you instead."

[heart-freak]

[chronicowboy]

started my leverage rewatch and never has a pilot episode piloted so hard. it genuinely feels like walking into a room of old friends you haven't seen in about a year. they work alone, they always work alone. parker? she's insane. what're you gonna do when she finds out you live with your mom? age of the geek, baby! twenty pounds of crazy in a five pound bag. boys are on their way. what is it that you do? that's what i do. are we gonna talk about how hard we rocked last night? one show only, no encores. it was kinda cool being on the same side for once. i don't like guns. my money is not in my account that makes me cry inside in my special angry place. eleventy million dollars. that's a computer thing i told her to say that. so this time you really are inside my head. i'm just very good at what i do. somebody kiss this man so i don't have to (🤨). bad guys have money. we work on an alternative revenue stream. we provide... leverage

[independent-fics]

Rewatching “The 12-Step Job” and actually processing that Hardison and Eliot in the end are arguing who has to sit in the middle/next to happy pills Parker.

[blueskiesandstarrynights]

They don't talk about it.

But there's no way Nate should know those things. No way the client could have told him, no way he could've figured it out on his own. Not when these things were nothing more than fleeting thoughts from the mark. But Sophie notices him quietly go for the scotch behind the counter and rub at his head in pain with extra vehemence some days despite the latest con having no personal connection to him.

They don't talk about it.

But someone should've recognized Sophie on that con. There's no way she could have that many characters per con. No way none of those diplomats didn't recognize her from any of her previous cons. Not when she didn't change any more than her clothes and accent. But Nate notices her features seem to flicker at the peace and safety of home when she thinks he isn't watching.

They don't talk about it.

But no one could've survived that. And certainly not looking the way he does. There's no way he didn't come out of that fight broken and bloodied to all hell. Not when instead he walks out with a purposeful stride and only a clenched jaw, rolling his shoulders. But when he's cooking and accidentally burns himself, Parker notices the unmarked skin left behind.

They don't talk about it.

But not all vents are human sized. They all saw the size of the vent cover as she exists with a grin. There's no way she could've fit in there. Not when the human body can't bend that way, a way that even the greatest contortionist can't bend. But some days Hardison notices as she seems to stretch and bend before his eyes when she's feeling relaxed and safe enough.

They don't talk about it.

But that's not how computers work. There's no way Hardison could access that kind of thing. Not when he describes how he did it like that. Not when he does it so quickly like that. Not when he says he's taken berries and the next thing they know he's recreated a colonial era journal to perfection. But Eliot swore he shoved a glass of water at him, not more goddamn orange soda.

They don't talk about it, the thing lingering over their heads as they conduct each con, the unacknowledged thing between the five of them that's a little deeper than just a desire to take down the rich and powerful.

They aren't perfect, they all know that- sometimes they're too good with their covers, sometimes they have to shift gears as the con unfolds before them, but somehow things always seem to work out.

But no one asks about it, so-

They don't talk about it.

[empressofthewind]

i really don't think Mello gets enough credit for how good he is at staying calm in a crisis. like when he finds out Takimura is dead:

the rest of the mafia is in shambles, but Mello? smirking. unbothered. already moved onto his next plan.

and when the police force kills all his allies and raids his hideout:

he exhibits mild annoyance at best. he's certainly not happy about it, but he looks kind of pissed for about 2 panels, and then he immediately launches into action, focusing on self-preservation and taking measures to prevent the Death Note from falling into their hands. he's still moving, still calculating, still thinking on his feet. he didn't expect this but he's prepared for it, and when we next see his face in the monitor room:

smirking. totally unbothered yet again.

compare this to how Near reacts when the SPK raids his base:

angry. immediately breaks something. he does have a plan, and he jumps into action fairly soon after this, but he stays angry even while he's making preparations, and starts insulting the people who are attacking him.

to contrast this specifically against the scene of Mello's base being raided; both are about to lose access to their main hideout, both are at a genuine risk of being killed, and both have backup plans for their respective predicaments, yet the notoriously cool, calm and collected guy reacts more emotionally than the emotional guy.

[gummy-sharks666]

Meronia is so beautifully tragic. Near always looked up to Mello, always believed that he couldn’t beat Kira without him, but Mello would for the rest of his short life, always believe that Near looked down on him… even after death Near would thank him and contribute his success to him…

And the sad thing is I don’t think Mello would’ve ever been able to accept that. I truly believe Wammy’s House and the pressure put on those kids to be the next L is what created Mello’s inferiority complex. I don’t think Near could’ve fixed that either, dealing with his own trauma and the way he expresses his emotions so unconventionally. Sometimes I wonder if Near still feels so much guilt and anger at himself for not being able to make Mello understand, even though it wasn’t his job to, especially as a clearly autistic person unable to express appreciation and love in a “conventional” way.

But anyway!

[applestorms]

i love near so goddamn much. i finally read the c-kira and a-kira post-canon one shots all the way through last night and AAAAAAAAA my heart. nate river 🫵🫵🫵

c-kira in particular hits me hard bc you can really see that he's still reeling from the events of the main story. it’s a very specific era of near that’s so horribly awkward and insecure about his place in the world, about his role as L, and has so very few people left behind to support him-- really just lidner, rester, and gevanni. so much of that story is about near struggling to figure out who he is and who he wants to be in the wake of Everything, scrambling around in the shadows of all these false gods and blown up egos, trying to grow up and be a Person in the smoking remains of all these people who killed themselves with their own hubris. i mean, just look at this page:

LOOK AT THIS. near is almost shockingly expressive in this story, his grief and regret is fucking Palpable in a way that you very rarely see with a guy like him. it really gets to me that this is the story where near actually opens up about his mixed feelings surrounding the original L, about the interview he held where he picked near & mello out to be his two successors, and all while hiding himself within these massive card towers that you only see to be these giant L's at the end-- a kid barely out of his teens already getting dwarfed by the enormity of the history he is expected to continue and represent. the winner of the game who's only prize is the legacy he now holds on his shoulders, the grief he is cursed with as the only one left behind. this kid barely has anyone now, never even got the chance to truly, fully know what he lost in the first place, these all-powerful figures that have dictated every inch of his life from the moment he stepped foot in that damn house.

and i mean, goodness. what did we expect? i can talk all i want about the cinematic parallels of light & L as opposites, but look at near & mello in literally every piece of official art-- near truly loses his other half when mello dies, and you can just Feel the discomfort, the deep-seated, underlying imbalance in his soul through this shit.

a-kira near, on the other hand, has had the time to grow a bit more at ease with himself, but he still gets to me in a slightly different way. i cannot emphasize enough how utterly fucking perfect the decision to make his hair longer is-- for so simple of a detail, it really sums up so much about his character. this version of an older near feels like a guy who's been stuck outside of time for ages, barely even noticing the constant shifts of the outer world as he holes himself up in his room, hardly aware of the way that his own body stretches and grows and changes with each passing day. doing his job, all just for a bit of entertainment. there is still that distinctly privileged, childish part of him that hides in his forts of toys and makes whatever demands he pleases, but it's more smoothed over, more exhausted, more Done.

he's packed away the grief by this point. dealt with it properly? not necessarily. but the wound isn't as raw now so he can set it aside to be ignored or looked over more easily, focus on the things that he wants to. blow up his toys when they don't meet his standards.

i strikes me as important that near's view on the new kira's shifts so much over the course of even just these two little stories. in the c-kira story, near is so Quick to shit on the new guy as fast as possible, literally snarking him into submission with the fear of his presence alone until he writes his own name down. we never see this "cheap" kira, this pathetic fake that couldn't possibly stand up to the original. (projecting a little there, nate?) he's barely more than a panel or two of hands, and then he disappears from the story forever.

in a-kira though, you get something a little more desperate, a little more hungry-- near really fucking wants to meet this new guy, purely for the sake of talking to him, and is a lot quicker to respect him & the depth of how well he's thought through this plan. at first it seems like he's intrigued by the idea of finally finding yet another equal, someone to match his freak after years of standing on his own, and knowing DN you're inclined to trust that the mind games will eventually happen. but, in the end...

he loses. and doesn't he seem so happy about it?

minoru really is the perfect match for near in a way-- a new, passive kira, uninterested in the bullshittery of killing and shinigami and evil murder diaries, to reflect and match the tired, new L who was done with his job before he even started doing it. RIP minoru dying due to shinigami bullshit, but i'm genuinely happy that this is the ending near gets, the chance to finally lose at something without having to pay the price of human lives for it. winning has almost never been a truly positive thing for near-- his winning wammy's house only gave him the many pressures & stresses of a job as L, his winning against light only gave him a dead mello and a notebook to quietly burn, hell, all of this shit happening at all is what made mello resent him so much in the first place.

but now he can lose. and i think he's all the better for it.

near is immature, yes, he bossy and snarky and blows up his toys without giving a fuck what anyone else has to say-- but he doesn't get ahead of himself in the way that light and L and the others did, a trait which ultimately lets him win but also leaves him behind to shoulder the grief of a generation. but now he can lose, he can let the fate of the world fall of his shoulders for just a moment, and everything is still going to be okay. it's good to see him getting older. it's good to see that you can still move on and grow, even when it seems like the legacies of the past are locking you away in a cage. i'm glad these manga exist, and i'm glad near can still make it out alive.

[dark-cynder49]

When your linking family trait is an intense "side-eye" and "I'm so fucking tired of all this yokai bs"

[ambrosiadreamer]

i am going to be real here . i would've fallen hook, line and sinker for the other mother's tricks. the food alone would've done me in

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

Gotta say one of my favourite Leverage moments is when Nate explains that he's quit drinking but is renting a condo above a bar Eliot's like "🤨 very Catholic of you."

[heart-freak]

we do Hermitcraft here

I tried to tag everyone, it will not let me..

[purplepenguintime]

Adding one more to the list of animated movies I thought were never going to see the light of day that said fuck you disney:

[kaiwuzherenz]

okay wait. pause

WHAT!

kkkkkkkkkkk... i know everything that catra has done during S1-4 but to still blame her after S5

okay people...im so not going to ramble about this

i am

anyway! if you cant give catra just the benfit of the doubt i mean like. She tried to change.. Glimmer help her see that she wanted to change for the better. and what did catra do? she saved glimmer from horde prime

then we see that because catra did this, horde prime was very angry....

and then catra got chipped.......... adora offers to take her home. S1-4 Catra would have said no at any cost, but S5 catra is changing for the better

because of this again, horde prime gets angry again and then snap..just killed catra on the spot

adora then jumps down to save catra (ngl watching this, i throught adora basiclly just killed herself but u know she lived)

now we have catra back, the one how wants to change (FOR THE BETTER i must add) Entrapta helps to get the chip out of catras neck, while the ship is going through a belt in space.... Catra trys to say no for this help, knowing that she had hurt entrapta and sent her to beast island.. Entrapta doesnt even care and helps catra, very sorry when she hits one of catras nerves in her neck..

s1-4 catra would have prob attacked entrapta, but s5 catra qucikly calms downs so entrapta could contune

the chip gets removed, and catra sees that entrapta doesnt hate her...and before entrapta could leave, catra stops her

heres the thing i must point out too. S1-4 catra could say sorry or smth like that, but s5 catra says sorry and means it... PART 2 LATER CUZ I NEED A BREAK NGL!!!!!!!!!

[falling-star-cygnus]

you gotta love Nate Adams

man gets ragged on relentlessly by both his friends and yokai for being 'average' and yet still treats all of them with unending amounts of gentle kindness -> unless you're Whisper or Jibanyan but you could also argue that those two are closer to him than the others

he even takes the time to make sure the yokai he 'fights' are okay afterwards, this boy was raised RIGHT